#(and I’m not sayin weed I have a SCHEDULE for that

[heylinfanclub]

Waiting for Thursday money and contemplating If I should write about budget when I get back from spending it jdjdjsh.

[kinsbin]

Title: Midnight snack Word Count: 2011 Pairing: Alexys/Lobo [SI/Canon]

Summary: Alexys can’t sleep, so Lobo takes it upon himself to make her night at least a little entertaining. 

A/N: Commission for @space-sweetheart! Always a delight to write for ;u;

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Alexys tried to ignore the gentle poke of Lobo’s finger to her cheek as she stared down at her phone, the illuminating light of the video she had opened up in an effort to sleep slowly dwindling in a background tense as her lover’s distractions grew. A gentle prod to her side morphed into a harsh jab to her cheek. Then his fingers reached out and squeezed the soft meat of the same cheek he had been poking at with merciless abandone. It was on his third squeeze that Alexys yelped in surprise and flipped herself around, hand jutting out to whap softly at the massive man’s biceps with a pout to her lips. Lobo feigned a dramatic ‘owwww’ before losing his composure and laughing heartily at the face his lover made at his side.

“Aw did I wake you?” His voice was teasing and held no real echo of true apology in it, not that Alexys had expected it to. He was well aware that she was unable to sleep at times and, rather than encourage her to try and get some rest outside of when it hit a few days at a time, he was in the habit of bothering her at any given moment. Boredom often did things to the powerful being in his moments of thought that, for all of her human life, she would never be able to quite figure it out.

“What do you waaaant.” Alexys bemoaned as she rolled further onto her lover, continuing until she was all but sprawled across his broad chest. Beneath her she could feel the movement of his inhales and exhales even as they shook in a deep chuckle of amusement. One hand reached up to touch at Alexy’s hair, making her hum and snuggle herself further against Lobo as he smirked and continued to twirl strands idly between his fingertips.

“I was simply admiring the view.”

“Please, there was no view,” Alexys argued as she gazed up at him. Lobo frowned and gave a teasing tug to one strand of Alexys’ hair, making her startled not in pain but in surprise as she shooed his hand away from the tresses with a blush to her cheeks.

“Please,” Lobo purred, “You’re a fine thing to view. The drool on your lips when you finally do fall asleep and start snoring? Beautiful~.”

“Okay now you’re just asking to sleep on the floor.” Alexys threatened as she reached up to attack his hair with her own fingertips, running them through the thick locks atop his head and making Lobo laugh in earnest this time as he accepted her advances with a tilt of his own head and a thoughtful hum.

“Comfier than some of the other shit places I’ve slept in before. Trust me. Ever spend the night in an intergalactic prison? Ain’t go NO decent toilet paper anywhere. Not even for shittin, just for making a bed out of!”

Alexys wrinkled her nose at the mere image of the concept, “That’s disgusting.”

“That’s space politics!”

Alexys couldn’t help but laugh at the simplicity of her lover’s statement, her lips curling into that perfect smile that Lobo seemed to get lost in for one reason or another. His chaotic nature always reigned supreme in his behavior, certainly, but even an entity of trans dimensional space bounty hunting could appreciate the sight of a cute girl on top of him, laughing at his jokes as he wraps his arms around her waist and tugs her sharply into a playfully rough hug.

“Seriously though,” Alexys pinched his arm with a smile, “I can’t get back to sleep… I was really hoping to fix my sleep schedule too.”

“Well, why do you think you can’t get to sleep?”

“I don’t know,” Alexys shrugged indesiviley as she sat up so that she was straddling his torso, her hair falling over her shoulder and along the edges of her tank top in a beautiful way, “I feel like there’s always something on my mind, so I keep thinking and it just… doesn’t stop. Sometimes I just think my body makes up excuses for it not to fall into a REM cycle, I swear to fucking-”

At that moment her stomach let off a soft growl, causing a shade of pink to rise against Alexy’s cheek as she reached out to cover her stomach with both arms, hiding it from the raised eyebrow gaze of Lobo beneath her.

His laugh soon boomed around the rest of the room, sitting up so that Alexys had to balance by placing her arms around his shoulders and holding herself close to him with a pouty huff. Of course he would drag her even more close when she did something embarrassing. It was like he loved to revel in the mistakes she made. In a way he sort of did. It reminded Lobo how… human she was among the entirety of the world. How simply her existence handled itself against the weight of the universe he’s known for so, so long. Spending time with her, even just like this, made him feel more alive than any aspect of his bounty hunting career that he could recall. Not more alive than dolphins, though. Nothing could oust those majestic creatures.

“Sounds like your body knows what it wants to me!” Lobo declared with a ruffle of her hair and a grin on his lips, “You hungry, pipsqueak?”

“Yes but no-shut up!” Alexys huffed, “Its like 3 in the morning I SHOULDN’T be hungry.”

“The stomach wants what the stomach wants and all that shit,” Lobo declared with a dismissive wave of his hand, “Doesn’t matter the time, just matters the metabolism.”

“That’s not even how that saying goes.”

“No, I’m pretty positive that’s how the sayin goes. Now then!”

When Lobo stood up he took Alexys with him, scooping her in his arms bridal style and causing her to yell and cling even tighter to his neck as she gazed down at the floor below her in something half between frustration and amusement. Her complaints faded as she looked upwards in admiration of his face. From the edges of his jaw to the way he pulled his lips into a sharp grin of amusement, there was chaotic and handsome energy around him all at once. Did she really just think the words ‘handsome energy’? Alexys wanted to bury her face away so that he couldn’t somehow read her thoughts and make the situation even more ridiculous than it already was!

“Let’s get some grub!”

“We have nothing in the house,” Alexys bemoaned sadly, “We were supposed to go grocery shopping the other day and forgot to, remember?”

“I didn’t forget, I just didn’t want to.” Lobo declared with the confidence of a man who should not have been as proud of the statement as he was. Alexys couldn’t stop the laugh of moderate disbelief as she raised an eyebrow at him in wonder.

“You’re taking me out at 3am for food then?”

“There’s that 23-hour diner nearby that serves the best pancakes all night round.”

“You’ve never been to this diner nor have you had a pancake.”

“I’ve had pancakes! What the fuck do you think I am, a godless heathen?”

“Should I answer that?”

Lobo rolled his eyes (at least she was pretty sure he was rolling his eyes) and it made Alexys laugh all the brighter as she was continuously carried through the house, not bothering to be put back on the floor for as long as her boyfriend was willing to keep her in his strong, safe arms.

She wasn’t sure when they had left the apartment building they shared, nor when they had walked down the still streets of their neighborhood to the diner they both longed for, but there was no complaint from her as she was promptly dropped into one of the diner’s plush leather booths with an unceremonious ‘thud’.

The patrons of the diner watched in moderate terror as Lobo’s form took up the entirety of one side of a booth, his hulking appearance ever imposing as it always was. Alexys had long since learned to ignore the looks of others as they ogled her boyfriend in terror. Though the thought of their eyes was always still there in the back of her mind, dating Lobo was a wild mixture of constant stares and surprised yells as he got into something he probably should not have in one way or another.

The process of ordering their food wasn’t so much ‘ordering’ as it was the waiter tentatively coming up to them both, Alexys giving her request for some french toast and a cup of coffee, and then Lobo yelling sharply at the guy before thanking him with a roll of his eyes as he scampered away. Lobo mumbled something about ‘the service here’ that made Alexys bite her lip and smile through the giggles she choked out.

“Do you have to give every waiter a hard time?”

“It weeds out the weak ones, I do it for their growth, I swear!”

She simply kicked his leg under the table, laughing in unison with him as the two watched the outside world beyond the realm of their diner. As the foods arrived, piles of greasy diner foods and sweet milkshakes at either side of them, Alexys couldn’t help but feel… content in a strange way. Comfortable in the space she was in, even if that space was three in the morning in a diner she had never been to before. The world felt… so much bigger like this, though. As if so much more was bound to happen.

Was that just a side effect of living with Lobo, she wondered? He definitely made things interesting, that was for certain.

The thought passed just as Lobo took a bite of his hamburger that nearly made the entire thing disappear. She leaned on her hand as she chewed at a bite of her own food, hiding a smile behind her hand as she raised an eyebrow at Lobo, who gave her a thumbs up in return.

“It’s fucking good!”

Alexys swallowed her own bite and nodded, “Yeah, I’m surprised!”

Lobo laughed at her face and then reached out, brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear while reaching out to nab at once of her pieces of French Toast and return to his own space, admiring his handy work as a blush warmed Alexy’s cheeks.

“You’re insufferable.” Alexys declared as she watched him wolf down her additional french toast slice between hungry lips.

“Ah, but you love me!”

Alexys blushed as she looked away, cutting fiercely at the slice of food left among its syrupy remains and muttered the words despite herself:

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

Lobo paused mid-chug of his soda and raised his eyebrows in surprise, the statement never truly ceasing to amaze him as Alexys admitted her words with slight difficulty. She looked back at him and bit her cheek to contain her own insecure look as she fiddled with her fork and knife for a brief moment. Lobo’s grin was growing inch by inch the longer the two of them watched one another, as though he was revving himself up for something. Alexys felt her shoulders tense for a brief moment before she was lifted up and scooped into a rather obnoxious hug from the other sharing the booth.

“God, I just LOVE hearing you say those ridiculous words, baby!” Lobo laughed heartily as Alexys squirmed in surprise at the suddenness of his actions, her face reddening as she looked around at the other patrons now unashamedly eyeing her with something between awe and amusement.

“Lobo you’re making this embarrassing!” Alexys declared as she struggled more.

“Shut up, I gotta ENJOY this moment. This sweet confession!”

“I changed my mind, I hate you, now let me go!”

Alexys found herself laughing as well though, her lips curling into a smile of delight as she soon found herself hugging Lobo back. Indeed, sometimes the nights were just better with him at her side. No matter where they went, they were there for one another that was for certain. Even in diners at 3am.

[zanybohbot]

The Outsiders: Camp Squit

The Outsiders: Camp Squit (Episode 4)

Published: 10-19-19 - Updated: 10-21-19

Squit planned an idea of what's happening in this weekend as he planned to go camping with Pinky, Brain, Pesto and Wakko. Will the others ruin it for him? Will it cause cringy chaos? Read what happens and find out. This is the 4th fanfiction episode of The Outsiders.

Part 1: The Arrival

(Brain is driving in the woods with Squit, Pinky, Pesto and Wakko for their camping trip.)

Squit: As we're near, I thought I'd run through the itinerary for this weekend.

Wakko: What's an itinerary?

Pesto: (annoyed) Squit's way of taking the piss outta everything?

Squit: No, it's just a schedule of what we'll do and when we'll do it.

Pinky: Okay, item one, get your shit off my side of the car! (pushes Squit's suitcase)

Squit: It's not shit. It's essentials for everyone to make the trip more enjoyable!

Pinky: Oh, really? (Gets out Monopoly from Squit's suitcase) Monopoly?! Y'fuckin' serious?! This is tha most shitty-ass game you've ever bought! Look. All we need is beer and weed and I've got plenty of both.

Squit: Why have you brought a load of weed?

Pinky: In case I get lucky and stoned.

Squit: But we're camping by a lake near a woods.

Pinky: Listen, all these country bitches love some big city diugh.

Squit: You're not from the big city!

Pinky: Well growing up in da hood counts as a city to them!

Brain: (frustrated) Pesto, look at the map, please! Where is it?!

Pesto (checks phone) Uhhh...I dunno. It's around here somewhere. Th-the next left or something.

Brain: (sarcastically) And that's what Google Maps says, "The next left or something"?

Pesto: Sorry, dude, I'm running outta brain juice. What if I have to literally give birth with the babe from Walmart I had sex with? Can you imagine how fuckin' disgusting that'll be, watching that baby getting squeezed outta her ass?

Squit: Okay, I've got some news, Pesto. Do ya...

Pesto: Oh, here we are, B. Turn left.

(Brain turns left to the nearest forest.)

Brain: Oh, Jesus Christ, it stinks. Is it near a pig farm, Pesto?

Pesto: Sorry, that was me. It just slipped out.

(they all gag and moan by the smell)

Pinky: What?! (holds nose)

Brain: Ugh! I can't believe that's the smell of your ass!

Squit: I think I'm gonna throw up!

Wakko: I can fucking see it! It's like a brown mist!

(Squit N/R: Despite Pesto's anxious bowels burning our eyes and choking our lungs, we made it to the forest. I'd researched this place online and it certainly delivered. Secluded. Remote. Beautiful.)

(All 5 were standing in the forest.)

Pesto: So...where do we shit?

Squit: What?

Pesto: When we need to shit, where do we shit?

Pinky: Hang on, he's right. Where are we gonna shit?

Squit: Well, usually, you'd place a trench at least.

Pesto: Well, what trench, smart-ass?!

Squit: The toilet trench.

Wakko: Where you place the public bathrooms?

Squit: No, it's where you DO a public bathroom.

Pesto: (whacks Squit in the head) Fuck you, I'm not shittin' in a trench! Dafuq's the matter with ya?!

Pinky: Dude, you're fuckin' high.

Brain: I'm not going near a hole filled with your shit!

Squit: (rubbing his head) No. We each get our own trench. That's what I'm sayin'.

Brain: (sarcastically) Oh, OK. Yeah 'coz that makes sense!

Wakko: We're camping surrounded by shit?

Pinky: No! No-one's shittin' in a trench! That's disgustin', I'm not gonna do it! We'll have to drive to tha bar or a convenience store or something.

Pesto: Shit there?

Pinky: Shit there.

Wakko: Good idea.

Brain: Agreed.

Pinky: Then, that's decided, write that down, Squit, item two.

Squit: Could do. Or you could remember to shit in the bar when we're there anyways?! Now, c'mon. Let's get this tent up.

Pesto: I need to go now, tho.

Squit: What? Just hold it in!

Pesto: I can't, I get emotional.

Squit: We only just got here, Pesto! Camp first, shit second!

Pesto: I don't think I can, I'm honestly gettin' teary here, it feels like it's trying to push its way back up into my stomach!

Wakko: Great. I need one now, too.

Brain: What about that gas station we've just past?

Pesto: (panicking, holding his ass) Oh, God, the snake's out the cave!

Squit: Fine. Everyone, back in the car.

(They got back in the car and drove to the nearest gas station.)

(Squit N/R: So our camping trip was shortly delayed while Pesto left what he described as "King Kong's finger" in the Welcome Break bathrooms. Pesto genuinely felt better about life after unloading a massive turd. And now the car was unloaded, so did I.)

(Back at the forest.)

Squit: First need to clear the ground, make sure the site is safe and then put up our tent.

Pinky: Fuck dat, let's just crack open the beers and build a fuckin' massive fire up in this bitch!

Squit: You can't just build a fire. It takes preparation. I mean, have we even asked the landowner's permission?

Brain: (frustrated) Squit, c'mon! I didn't come here for a refresher course in the Countryside Code. I just wanna get pissed and have fun. Otherwise, I won't be able to do any of this in Wales.

Pinky: What, 'coz there's no fields?

Brain: No, 'coz I won't have any friends of my kind.

Pinky: You won't need friends. Welsh hoes are totally horny.

Brain: Are they?

Pinky: Yeah. Pretty much all British porn stars are Welsh, even though they are popular here in America. Most of them don't even get paid, they just do it for dick.

Brain: (sarcastically) Oh, OK, made-up sluts. Now I'm glad I'm going to Swansea. Oh, fucking hell, Swansea! I have to see my grandpa for a WHOLE WEEK in Swansea!

Squit: Fine, Brain, look if you really want, I'll build you a fire. Y'all put the tent up, I'll go and find some suitable wood and kindling.

Wakko: All right, Akela. HA!

Squit: But remember, fire is an element, it must be respected.

(He leaves to find some wood.)

(Squit N/R: Camping's all about self-reliance and teamwork. And I knew I could rely on myself to create the perfect camp and my team fucking it all up.)

(When he came back, he saw his stuff from his suitcase being burnt down with fire as his suitcase was open, it causes him to have a panic attack and drops all of the wood he just found.)

Squit: WHAT...THE...FUCK HAVE YA DONE!?

Pinky: Y'okay, Squit?

Wakko: (tried to hand Squit a cooked sausage) Want a sausage?

Pesto: Calm down. I just got it going and I didn't even need a fire gay's badge.

Pinky: Nah, just some diesel.

Squit: You put diesel on it? Wait a minute. Is that my fold-out table on the fire? (gasp) And my picnic basket?!

Pinky: I thought you said look for stuff to burn.

Squit: (getting angry) Wood, burn fucking wood, not my stuff! Oh, for Christ's sake! Why would ya do that?!

Pesto: Look, someone had to take charge of this weekend or it's gonna be all Monopoly and shitting in trenches!

Brain: Look, come on, sit down, have some weed, have a beer, have a sausage. Just chill.

Squit: I'll chill when y'all stop burning up my fuckin' valuable possessions to dust!

Pinky: (teasing) Oh, but I thought they were for "everyone"?

Squit: Yes, for everyone to use, not to burn up with! God.

(Wakko saw the fire going down so he puts Squit's fold-out chair on top of it.)

Squit: What the hell are you doing now?!

Wakko: Fire's going down.

Squit: (getting furious) STOP...BURNING...MY...THINGS!

Wakko: (angrily) Sorry, I forgot. (flips his chair off the fire) Jeez!

(Squit N/R: We were barely an hour from home, but somehow that meant that burning my possessions was not only OK, but hilarious.)

Part 2: R.I.P. Brain's Shitty Car

(Squit was sitting down still looking pissed off because of what happened earlier.)

Brain: Oh, come on, we're sorry. It was just a joke.

Wakko: We'll do whatever you want to cheer you up.

Pinky: Anything you like.

Squit: (smiled) Game of Monopoly?

(The others moan about this)

Pinky: Oh, fuck off!

Pesto: Boooooooooooooo! Y'suck!

Brain: Apart from that.

Pinky: Look, if you wanna play a game, I've got a proper game, not a shitty one, especially Monopoly. Though thinking about it, y'all might be too pussy to play.

Wakko: It's not that game that you used to play with your weird neighbour in his shed, is it?

Pinky: (looks nervous) Well, that never happened.

Wakko: Yeah, you told me about 8 years ago. Just after he moved away.

Pinky: No, I never. Shut up, dumbass!

(Wakko looks confused)

Pinky: OK, to start with, y'all have to swap phones. Squit, you swap with mine. Brain, I'll swap with your phone. Wakko and Pesto can swap each others and Pesto can swap with Squit.

(They all swap phones.)

Brain: Okay...now what?

Pinky: Now you text someone in their phone book. So when you text someone, they'll think it's from him.

Wakko: So does that mean I have to write it all posh and like all hurdy wurdy durdy?

Pinky: Nope. The only rule is you can write whatever you like and no-one can stop you.

Squit: I just wanna say, for the record, there's no way anything good can come outta this.

Pinky: Whatever. Ready? Go.

(They all text.)

Pinky: I've only got five numbers in my phone, and four of them are four of y'all, so do ya worst.

Pesto: Well, as long as one of the others is Squit's mama, you're still in trouble.

Squit: (looking disgusted) Pesto, come on, that's too much.

Pinky: Sorry, it's literally the point of the game, y'know.

Squit: Awww...fuck. Fine!

Pinky: Right, homies, finished?

Wakko: (finished texting) That's it, send 'em.

Pinky: Good, now swap back.

(They swapped back their phones.)

Pinky: Good, so I wrote, from Brain's phone to Billie, "Bills, I love you from the bottom of my ding-a-ling. The thought of leaving you is making me cum." (laughs)

Brain: (embarrassed) Oh, god.

Pinky: "And I'm using those tears as lube to jerk myself off with."

Brain: (sarcastically/disgusted) Gee, thanks, Pinky.

Squit: Don't worry, B, I texted Pinky's dad and wrote, "Dad, I'm just thinking about you."

Pinky: (whispered) Hmph, pussy.

Squit: "I'm in the bath and I'm hard." (laughs)

Pinky: (angrily) Holy fuck! Damnit, you've won this round!

Brain: Pesto? What about you?

Pesto: Fairly standard to Squit's mama. "Ma, it's been 29 years, but I'd love to have another go on your big fake-ass tits."

Squit: (embarrassed) God. No.

Pesto: "Then I'd like to smash in your back doors (anus)."

Squit: (sarcastically) So it'll come up that I've sent her a text, she'll think, "Good, he's just letting me know I'm proud of him," then she'll read that? Yep, thanks Pesto!

Pesto: No probs. Wak, who did you send to?

Wakko: I presume, your dad? I wrote "Your gay as fuck." HA!

(There was a short silence as Pesto looks pissed)

Pesto: (he snatches his phone back from Wakko) Gimme my phone back!

Wakko: Wait, I've also wrote for Saucy Walmart Karen.

Pesto: Wait, did ya?

Wakko: Hell yeah, I've written, "Karen, I love you and love that you are to be the mother of my child. Marry me?"

Pesto: Oh, c'mon!

Pinky: Nice.

Pesto: I only met her a month ago. She smells like cheese most of the time.

Pinky: What, 'coz of all dat dick she sucked?

Pesto: Yes...no...maybe...I DUNNO! God, I thought coming out here would take me mind off it, but the countryside's really boring! It's just a load of fields and rivers. And they don't do anything. They just sit there doing jack, it's not like The Blair Witch Project where people jump out at you.

Pinky: He's right, it is boring.

Wakko: Shall we go back?

Brain: Oh, no, come on, we could go for a swim? Skinny dipping? (The others look slightly disgusted) Yeah, you're right, probably be a bit gay.

Squit: Well, there's always Monopoly.

(They moan once again.)

Pinky: Fuck, fine, as long as I can be the dog.

Squit: Why?

Pinky: Reminds me of Benji.

(Squit N/R: This was great. Camping. Playing board games round the fire as the sun went down. It was like I was back in Cub Scouts, but without the unpleasantness.)

(At night, they were still playing Monopoly.)

Pinky: Miami, with a hotel, that's $1,500 you owe me, Top Hat.

Squit: Can I pay you after I pass Go? I'm nearly there.

Pinky: Nope.

Squit: (frustrated) Oh, c'mon. This is impossible. I can barely see. I've not been able to see anything for fuckin' hours! Let's just stop.

Brain: OK, we'll call it a draw.

Pinky: Fuck you, just because I'm winning and all you've got is just cities!

Pesto: I'm happy to call it a draw, y'know.

Pinky: Course you are, 'coz you were out four hours ago anyway, you fuckin' idiot!

Pesto: Y'all think I'm dumb, but I've got street smarts!

Brain: You got a woman from Walmart pregnant in her lunch hour.

Pesto: (pondered) Oh.

Pinky: I'll build another fire.

Squit: It's too dark to collect wood and you've burnt everything I own!

Pinky: Well, fine, I'll...I'll get Brain's shitty car and shine the lights over here.

Brain: Fine. Here ya go. (hand's Pinky his car keys)

Pinky: Thanks, mah boy!

(Pinky runs to Brain's car and turns on the headlights.)

(Squit N/R: This was embarrassing. I hadn't lost a game of Monopoly since I was 7. And yet I was about to be beaten by Pinky, a man who took pride in the fact that he couldn't count to 100.)

Squit: He really wants to win, doesn't he? I never knew he was so competitive.

Pesto: (eating sausages) I can't get enough of these sausages.

Wakko: (eating sausages) Yeah. I love 'em raw in the middle.

Pinky: Right, done. (he gets out of the car and shuts the door) Mission accomplished! Now you owe me $1,500. And you can pay me right fuckin' now!

(Brain's car was about to roll down into the lake.)

Brain: Pinky, my fucking car! (he stops his car from going down) Handbrake?

Pinky: Oh, shit, sorry.

Brain: Quick, everyone. Stop it!

(The others stopped the car except for Pinky.)

Brain: Pinky, help!

Pinky: Okay, calm your tits! (as he helped stopping the car)

Brain: (tried to unlock it) It's locked. Pinky, throw me the keys.

Pinky: I don't have them.

Brain: The fuck are you talkin' about, what do you mean you don't have them?!

Pinky: I gave them to you.

Brain: No, you didn't.

Pinky: Yeah, I did.

Brain: (getting angry) No, you fucking didn't!

Pinky: Brilliant, someone's gone and lost the fuckin' keys.

Squit: (looks at Pinky while being concerned) Yes, you. You've lost them.

Brain: You must have locked them in the car. (he panics) Oh, God! Oh, God!

Squit: Sorry, Brain. We'll have to smash a window or something.

Brain: (furious) Pinky, you dolt, Imma kill you for that!

Pinky: It's not my fault.

Brain: It is entirely your fault!

Pinky: I always lock my car like that!

Pesto: But yours must be different.

Wakko: It's shitty, for one.

Brain: (sarcastically angry) Thanks, Wak!

Pinky: If my lil' bro was here, he'd be able to get into it in two seconds flat. He used to jack Ferraris in New York City for the Mafia.

Brain: (bops Pinky in the head with a pencil in anger) How is that total bullshit helpful?!

Squit: Enough! OK, you three hold it. We'll go and find something to smash a window with.

Pinky: (rubbing his head looking dizzy) Hey! Why do me, Pesto and Wak have to hold the fuckin' car?!

Squit: Well, obviously, because you three are the strongest.

(Pinky, Pesto and Wakko hold the car.)

Pesto: Huh. It's true, we are.

Brain: What the fuck, why are there no rocks?! It's the countryside! Why aren't there any fuckin' rocks?! What are we gonna smash the window with now?!

Squit: Well, I dunno. Pinky's face?!

(Brain and Squit leave to find the rocks.)

Pinky: My arms hurt. I don't know why they're bothering to get rocks anyways. The way I look at it, it's inevitable that the car's gonna dive into the lake.

Wakko: I suppose it's nature. You can't fight nature.

Pesto: Exactly.

Pinky: It's going in anyway, I'm legitimately sweatin', my arms achin', we might as well just let go.

Pesto: Do you think Brain will kill us all?

Pinky: How can he? He hates it anyways. It's logical. We can't stop it.

Wakko: We are stopping it now.

Pinky: It's inevitable, Wak, trust me. We'll let go after three, do ya hear?

Pesto & Wakko: Gotcha.

Pinky: One, two, three. Go!

(They let go of the car as the car starts rolling down again. Brain and Squit finally got some rocks but Brain saw his car going down as he panicked and dropped the rocks.)

Brain: NO! Oh, God. Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God!

(The car went into the lake as there was a short silence, then Pesto picked the rock up and smashed the back window.)

Brain: Why did you do that?!

Pesto: You said smash a window. Look, there ya go!

Brain: NO! No, no, no! (Brain went into the lake and tried to get his car out and shortly gives up, looking at Pinky, Squit, Pesto and Wakko furiously) You assholes. You total pair of fuckin' scumbags!

Pesto: Relax, B. We'll just wait 'til morning and rescue it when the tide's out.

Brain: It's just a fucking lake, Pesto, the tide isn't going out! (He emotionally tears up) I've wasted my whole 14 years hanging around with you fuckin' morons! I wish I'd never met y'all at all! I can't wait to move to Swansea! I fuckin' hate you, fuck you! FUCK YOU!

Squit: Come on, Brain, come outta the water and dry off, you could get sick, I'm sure we'll think of something.

Brain: You never think of anything. You've just got an accent that makes us think you're clever, but you're not, are ya?! You're just as much of a fuckin' idiot as these three!

Squit: (he frowns) Wow, harsh.

Brain: You scumbags, you total, total scumbags! (he continues to get the car out) Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! (he gives up trying to get the car out)

Wakko: Do you want a lager, B?

Brain: Yes, please.

(Brain got out of the lake as they all go back to the camping area.)

Pinky: (he took Brain's keys out of his back pocket) Oh, shit! I did have the keys.

Squit: Uhhh...yeah. Probably wouldn't mention it. Like ever!

Pinky: Y'right! As a matter of fact! (he throws the car keys into the lake and leaves)

(Squit N/R: So, Brain's shitty yellow Fiat was gone forever.)

The Final Part: A Disgustingly Happy Ending

(But look on the bright side, at least Pinky did beat me at Monopoly now despite I've lost $1,500. But the last thing I wanted to have is Pesto burning my $10,000 suitcase for fire.)

(Squit and Brain watching Squit's suitcase being burnt down.)

Squit: Hey. Which do you think burns better, B, my suitcase or my dignity? Heh, heh, heh, heh. (sighs all sadly)

Brain: Yeah, ha-ha. Nice try, but this is now officially the worst night I've ever had. Let's just go home.

Wakko: How?

Squit: Call your dad, B. If you think about it, it's sort of his fault we're here anyways.

Brain: Ha, sorry, no chance. He's gonna go ballistic about picking us up at 2 in the morning. What about your lil' bro, Pinky?

Pinky: Nah. He's out with my dad, private poker tournament in Las Vegas with Danny Dyer and the Krays.

Squit: Wait. Aren't the Krays dead?

Pinky: No! That's just a cover story cos they done a bunk from prison. They're holed up in one of me dad's warehouses.

Brain: Of course.

(short silence)

Pinky: Shall we swap phones again to cheer us all up.

Squit: Sure, why not.

(They all swap their phones back to their previous precision)

Pinky: (reads text) Oh, Brain, you got a message for your insurance company, they said, "We're sorry about the car. One of our retarded staff sended you the wrong car. Just burn it, dump it, kill it with fire. We're sorry for the delay for the last 2 years. Your old one will be back in 2 days." Hmph, looks like you're not in trouble at all, Brain.

Brain: (confused but relieved) Huh, that was anticlimactic. Plus, I knew they tried to rip me off anyways.

Squit: (reads text) Oh. Looks like your dad and your brother are taking a break from that made-up poker tournament, Pinky. Your dad's just texted you back.

Pinky: Oh, shit. What did he say?

Squit: "You're sick, son. Your ma was right about sending you to that shrink."

Pinky: (looks nervous) What's he on about, that fuckin' asshole? Talkin' jack-shit as usual.

Wakko: (checks phone) You got a text, too, Pesto. It's from your babe. Maybe you should read it. (gives phone back to Pesto)

Pesto: Oh, thank you, God. Thank you.

Pinky: She said yes to the marriage proposal?

Pesto: Even better. It says, "You dopey prick. Not pregnant. Tested positive for" What's that say, Squit?

Squit: (read carefully) "Chlamydia."

Pesto: Nice! (short silence) Dafuq's chlamydia?

Squit: Well, how shall I put this, Pesto? You no longer have a child on the way but you do have an STD.

Pesto: (celebrates) I got an STD! Yes, an STD! Whoo!

Pinky: (continues to reads texts) Oh. It's from Billie and your dad. It says… (Brain snatches his phone back from Pinky) Douche!

(Brain reads the text from Billie and his dad, then suddenly smiles.)

Pinky: (curiously) Well?

Squit: Shall we go to bed? It is getting late.

Wakko: Yep, good idea.

(They all went in the tent.)

Pinky: Well...what did it say?

(Squit N/R: Brain was never this cagey. When it came to Billie or his dad, he normally wore his heart on his sleeve and his boner in his pants. Maybe he had other things on his mind.)

(Brain looks at the light in the tent while he was lying down.)

Brain: (slightly annoyed) So we had a light this whole time?

Pinky: Oh, shit, yeah. Forgot about that one. Sorry, man.

Brain: So, my car went into the lake for no reason?

Pesto: I'm upset too, B. I got my first hand job in that car. Who's gonna wanna gimme a hand job when I'm a dad?

Pinky: You're not gonna be a dad, remember, Pesto?

Pesto: (pondered) Oh, yeah!

Pinky: Whatever. Look, even if we did get it out, I doubt it would work anyway. I think the engine's flooded.

Brain: Is that supposed to be funny, Pinky?

Pinky: Did I say it was funny tho?

Brain: (pondered) Good point. I also felt happy I'm not going to Swansea next week. My grandpa cancelled the trip because he was broke.

(They all laugh.)

(Squit and Wakko came into the tent looking disgusted.)

Brain: How was the trench?

Squit: (looking disgusted) Wakko and I had to wipe our asses with leaves.

Brain: (disgusted) Jesus.

Squit: And I think there were some ants in there, so I now literally have ants in my pants. And soil, and some earwigs.

Wakko: I never wanna do that again.

Pesto: Hey. Do you remember that first time we slept in a tent in my back garden and Pinky pissed himself? (laughs)

Brain: Yeah, we had to come in the house at about midnight because Pinky got scared. (laughs)

Pinky: Yeah, I was scared that Pesto's dad was about to come out and rape us!

Pesto: (furious and disgusted) Just...go fuck yourself.

Squit: And on that familiar note, it's good night. (lies down in his sleeping bag) Sorry about your car, B.

Brain: Doesn't matter. It was a piece-of-shit car, anyway. Thanks for the send-off. For the last 2 years, I always knew they were trying to scam me in the first pla... (holds his nose) Jesus, that stinks, Pesto, was that a fart?

Pesto: Nah, Wakko and I burped. It ain't great, though.

Wakko: Yeah, I think it's them sausages.

Brain: Whatever. Good night.

Pinky: Well, I'll get the fuckin' light, then, shall I? (turns off the light) Night, mah boys.

(long silence)

Wakko: B, I was wondering, when you die?

Brain: Yeah?

Wakko: What do you want us to do with Squit? Like, look after him and stuff?

Squit: I'm not a stray cat, Wak.

Pinky: Yeah, but you do shit in a hole in the ground tho. (laughs)

Squit: (sarcastically) Gee, thanks.

Wakko: I just worry about you, that's all.

Squit: I think I'll be fine. Good night. (lies back down) Thanks, though, Wak.

(Wakko suddenly vomits on Squit)

Squit: (furious/disgusted) UGH! FUCKIN' HELL, IT'S IN MY HAIR!

Wakko: (feeling dizzy) I think it's the sausages.

Pinky: (panics and turns the light back on) Fuck dat! I've gotta get out. I've gotta get out!

Brain: (disgusted) Oh, God, the smell. It always makes me puke.

Squit: Please don't puke in here.

Brain: Oh no. (vomits)

Squit: (disgusted/annoyed) Oh, you have.

Wakko: I don't feel well. (vomits again)

(Brain pukes again)

Pesto: Help me! (vomits so much)

Pinky: Oh, shit, the smell. Oh, God, doublepuke!

Squit: JUST GET THE FUCKIN' TENT OPEN, PINKY!

Pinky: (tries to find the zip) I can't find the zip! I can't find the zip! Oh no! (vomits on the tent zip)

(Squit looks at his mini-blade as he knew what he had to do.)

Squit: (angrily) Great!

(Squit rips the tent with the mini-blade and got out, so did Pinky, Brain, Pesto and Wakko. They started walking away together abandoning a damaged tent, a burnt suitcase and Brain's shitty car in the forest)

Squit: (reads text) Oh, my mom's texted me back.

Brain: Is she up for some back door action?

Squit: Nope, it said, "I love you too but I think you're on weed. No offence."

Pinky: If she's up for it, Pesto should get to do her, cos it was his text that got her kinky.

Pesto: True.

Squit: Obviously she's not up for it.

Brain: How do you know?

Wakko: Does it say that pacifically?

Squit: Specifically.

Pesto: Are you sayin' she only likes it in her axe wound? Ha.

Squit: Seriously guys, c'mon, we've got a long walk ahead of us, I'm covered in puke, can we just drop the "yo mama" jokes?

Pinky: I'd like to drop yo mama's jokes. Get it?

(They all laugh while they were walking away from the forest.)

Squit: Okay, that's brilliant, I give ya that! Heh, heh!

(short silence)

Pinky: (putting on his fake Cockney accent) So what are we doing now, Brain?

Brain: The same thing we DON'T do every night, Pinky! Try and call my dad 'coz we're fuckin' lost! (laughs)

Pinky: Yep. Good idea.

Squit: Yep.

Pesto: Yep.

Wakko: Yep.

Brain: (relieved) When I get home, my dad's gonna kick...my...ass!

THE END!

This is the 4th fanfiction episode of The Outsiders. Thx. Hope you liked it. 

[jadeisthecooliest92]

Some Lovin’- A Brandon Arreaga One Shot

Hi all!

I’ve recently started getting into PrettyMuch and decided to write some stuff about them.

Please let me know what you think and maybe I’ll even start doing more and open up requests?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Green eyes scanned the living room full of people, mostly strangers as Sophia desperately looked for her best friend Zara.

Trying her best to shimmy through the sweaty bodies dancing to the music blasting off the walls, she sighed and held her red plastic cup in a death grip.

These types of parties were not her scene but as always, she fell victim to Zara's puppy dog eyes.

Finally getting to the kitchen, she slipped out the back door to the pool area that still held a lot of people but definitely less than inside.

Sipping the drink from her cup, she once again began to search for her friend, keeping her eyes out for her signature sleek black hair tied into a high ponytail.

She had almost given up hope until she spotted her, though she seemed a bit preoccupied judging by the guy attached to her mouth.

Laughing quietly and sending her friend encouraging thoughts, Sophia decided to chill and lean against the wall, nodding her head slowly to the beat from inside.

It's not that she was a prude, far from it but she just tended to be a bit shyer than her counterpart.

While Z could talk herself into any crowd, Sophia stood back and usually waited to be invited or noticed, that's just how their friendship was and it was perfect for her.

Pushing a stray piece of hair from her face, she enjoyed the end of her drink and pushed away from the wall in search of another.

Before she had made her way back inside, she was suddenly blocked by a tall body.

Almost stumbling back in surprise, she looked up at the persons face and relaxed slightly.

"Zion, you almost gave me a heart attack."

The dreaded boy grinned sleepily and reached a hand over, ruffling her hair as she scowled and swatted his hand away.

"Sorry shorty, I just couldn't help notice you over here looking all lost and shit. Wanna come smoke with me?"

Letting out a quiet laugh, she nodded and followed her friend to a more secluded area of the garden, her shoulders tensing a little when she noticed a few people she didn't recognize look their way.

"Someone pass me that shit so I can mellow shorty out."

While she didn't appreciate Zions taunts, she knew he meant well. The two had become unlikely friends over the last year from working together in music studios.

Sophia was a lyricist and composer working with lots of L.A based artists and she had met Zion and his group at one of the crowds parties.

They had all instantly got along, hanging out every once in a while when their schedules allowed it.

Smelling the familiar scent of weed, Sophia was snapped from her memories and accepted the rollie from her friends hands, not even hesitating to inhale deeply, her eyes closing and her nerves finally easing.

She passed it back to Zion and sat beside him cross-legged on the grass, her empty cup discarded as she leaned back onto her arms.

"So lil mama, why did I find you wandering around alone? Where's Z?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she relaxed and stared up at the dark sky, no signs of stars because of the light pollution from the city.

"You know I don't vibe like a lot of people here, I'm happy chilling alone, plus my girl seemed to be preoccupied with some dude."

Laughing, Zion offered her another hit but she shook her head and let him pass it to someone else in the group.

"So Z's getting some lovin', what about you?"

She scoffed and looked to her friend, raising a brow.

"I'm not the person that gets approached at parties, Zion and you know that."

"I know someone who would like to give you a lil sum sum."

He shoved her lightly and she noticed a shit eating grin fall onto his features.

"I know that fucking look, don't even think about--"

She was cut off when the guy stood suddenly and ran off like a giggling four year old, in search of what, she had no idea.

When he hadn't returned in a few minutes, she grumbled to herself and lay flat on the grass, eyes closing as she started contemplating finding Z again and dragging her home.

"You know, talking to yourself is a sign of losing your mind, right?"

She was surprised to hear someone speak to her as she opened one of her eyes to see who it was.

Her heart almost flew into her mouth as she looked up to see it was none other than Brandon Arreaga, one of Zions band mates who she was low key feeling from the day she met him.

The two had never hung out alone but they had spent hours together in studio with the others writing songs.

"It's a good thing I'm already aware of the fact I've lost my mind."

He flashed her a smile and offered her one of the cups he had in his hands.

She sat up and took it from him, thanking him quietly as she watched him join her on the grass.

Suddenly, Sophia was very aware of everything around her. She could smell his aftershave and he was close enough that his body heat radiated towards her.

Taking a sip from the cup, she paused and glanced at the handsome guy to her right.

He still had that smile on his face as he casually glanced back at her, eyes flashing with mischief.

"So Soph, what's up? You enjoying the party?"

She shrugged and looked down at her hands, fiddling with the plastic between them.

"Sure, I always enjoy these parties."

He laughed an almost snort and nudged her gently.

"Don't lie, come on you can tell me if you're not feeling it."

She chewed the inside of her cheek before letting out a sigh, a small grin playing on her lips.

"Alright, you caught me. I'm not exactly having the best night but Z is enjoying herself so I'm not going to whine and I'll take one for the team so she can have fun."

Brandon didn't say much for a minute as he studied her face, making her almost blush.

"Well, what would help you have fun?"

She didn't hear the underlying tone in his question and simply shrugged, not having much of an answer.

"Cause y'know, a little birdie told me..."

She almost spit out her drink as she scowled across the garden, her eyes scanning for Zion above the heads.

"That little birdie needs to watch himself or he might get de-feathered."

She was pulled from her murderous thoughts as an arm slid across her shoulders.

Turning her head quickly, Sophia almost instantly regretted all of her life choices as Brandon's beautiful, rich brown eyes stared at her intensely.

"I'm just sayin', you were over here alone and I approached you."

She thought back to her conversation with Zion and didn't know whether to thank him or bury him six feet under.

"Yeah but that's because Zion probably paid you to" she joked and licked her lips nervously.

Brandon inched his face closer to hers, eyes still boring holes into her own.

"Don't do that."

She frowned and raised a brow "Do what?"

"Don't play off your insecurities as jokes against yourself."

She didn't know what to say, no one had ever called her out on her bullshit before.

"You're beautiful, funny, talented and you need to learn to be more confident."

Her face was definitely red now, she could feel it. Brandon was speaking so honestly to her and she felt vulnerable.

The dark haired singer set his cup aside and brought his now free hand up to her cheek, gently running his thumb across her warm skin.

She noticed him leaning in even more, his eyes flickering to her lips as if asking permission.

After a moment of holding her breath, Sophia glanced off behind Brandon where their stupid pineapple head friend stood, cheering them both on.

Rolling her eyes, she felt Brandon turn her gaze back to him and time seemed to stop before he whispered between the two "Fuck it."

Just like that, their lips collided in a kiss that could only be described as an explosion.

Hands became entangled in hair as their bodies pressed closer together, both of them completely drowning in each other.

After what seemed like minutes, the two pulled apart enough to catch their breath.

Neither of them spoke, they simply stared at each other with new eyes.

As Brandon opened his mouth to speak, they were interrupted by Zion obnoxiously throwing himself on top of them both, causing them to groan in protest, everyone's alcohol spilling onto the grass.

"GET SOME LOVIN' SHORTY."

[cactigratitudelove]

Empire State of Mind

Sometimes darkness comes in the form of exhaustion, insomnia and small spaces with low lighting. It comes with being surrounded by thousands daily on your commute and feeling the most alone you've felt in such a long time. 

And by you, I mean, me. 

Small amounts of darkness that trickle through mostly well lit areas. Causing the fear that past depression experiences will take over the transition I am currently in. 

Patience.

I wait. I am strong. I have family, friends, and support. I am loved, missed and wanted. I am appreciated. I am grateful. I am humbled. 

Anxiety, depression, and darkness does not care for gratitude. It thrives on those little chemical thoughts of fear and the lowest part of the struggle. It is the back and forth of guilt and shame. It’s the back and forth of figuring out the difference between the two and thinking I ‘should’ know. 

It’s the knowing that I ‘shouldn't’ use the word ‘should.’

It’s the comparison that kills the creative sparks and joy in being a creative. It’s the realization that I am a cliché. It’s the realization that my lovely little cacti city and home did not prepare me for the culture shock of areas in my own country. It’s trying not to be #yesallmen over #metoo.  I love you B. 

“Woke” on the West Coast is certainly different from “woke” on the East Coast. Race. Religion. Gender. Sex. Diversity. I have so much more to learn. 

Mindful.

Thoughts upon thoughts. Written down on morning pages. The guilt for not doing my morning pages everyday. Satisfaction for when they do get done. The shame over not using the tools I know that I know how to utilize. Gratefulness for when I do use them.

Not good enough. Not authentic enough. Not talented enough. Not woke enough. Not Eco-Friendly enough. Not Mexican enough. Not white enough. Not Political enough. Not active enough. 

Enough. 

Morningside in West Harlem is a gorgeous place to live. Lower East Side is a fun ass place to work. Trains ‘D’ & ‘A’ are the quickest. The ‘1′ train is safer after 2am but takes longer. Did you know pepper spray can only be bought in the city with a license? You can not ship mace to NYC.  

I’m currently on that New York Diet: A third floor walk up, walking commutes, bagel & Lox... oh and coffee. Lots of coffee. No one said it was a healthy diet. 

Pizza rat. It’s a thing. Summer in the subway is truly hell but City Mappers is a god send. Reading on the train helps avoid eye contact with unwanted interactions while also giving time to finally finishing a book for once. “Fuck Politeness!”-MFM. 

Sharing a Lyft with a stranger saves you money and can be the most quiet commute of your life. Brooklyn is the hip and artsy place to be. Gentrification. It’s a thing-Harlem is “Up and Coming.” Astoria is the safest. Chelsea for the galleries. High Art vs. Low Art. Avoid Time Square in every way possible.  A jog in central park. Thoughts of Korey Wise, Kevin Richardson, Antron McCray, Yusef Salaam, and Raymond Santana. Thoughts of Trisha Meili. Thoughts of those who've jogged these paths before me and the history I have yet to know. 

New York based sitcoms and shows are relatable AF but will never truly capture the heart and soul of the city. AND, one hundred percent, won't tell you the truth about New York apartments and boroughs... Hannah Horvath lied to us all millennial non-New Yorkers. Hashtag white privilege. 

I think Abbi and Ilana speak the closest truth. Maybe. Yass Kweeeen! 

I’d be down for a more diverse New Yorker show... Just sayin.’ 

I’d be down for more diverse shows in general... Also, just sayin’

Beauty. Essex. Delancey. F,M, and J Trains. Champagne brunch. Live saxophones. Go-go dancers. “Any Allergies or any dietary restrictions?” Darwinism? L.E.S. (That's short for Lower East Side-New Yorkers love their acronyms.) “Put a pep in your fucking step!” Being in the weeds at a top restaurant in NYC is no where near being in the weeds at a mom and pop. Family meal is questionable today. And tomorrow. 

“Ryan, are you like my ‘Simone?’” The book Sweet Bitter is relatable in more ways than one. I love my day job. Grateful for sobriety. Grateful for Sobriety in L.E.S. My younger self in NYC would have been a shit show. I was a shit show. There are other people in NYC that are sober! Who’d-a thought! P.S. Sobriety doesn't mean greens are off the table. Why isn't it legal here yet? Progressive much, New York? I love sleep.

Dog walkers are honestly, truly the best sight to see. My heart. It grows. Every time.

“You work hard for the American dream?”

Far Rockaway Beach isn’t really that far. Take the ‘A’ for a quick getaway. "You’re from Jersey City?” Googles: “Where is Jersey City?” Amtrak gets you to New Hampshire in five hours. A five hour work day on the train is sometimes better than two hours in some coffee shops in Manhattan. NH is beautiful in the summer. Cooler. In-person friendship is beautiful for the soul.  Ponds are the size of lakes. I’m from the desert, how am I suppose to know the difference? New England is patriotic As Fuck. Can’t wait to see the fall foliage. Apparently it is definitely a thing.

Rejuvenation.

Note to self: A quick trip out of the city is required for mental hygiene. A dose of nature, occasional hugs, and laughter is highly recommended for future survival in the concrete jungle. 

Hopeful.

My ducks are in a row. My planner is filling up with hope. My hustle is real. Society of Illustrators hasn't changed since my visit in 2015. My personal projects are visualizing, slowly but surely. Asana and Ink & Volt keep me organized. Being vulnerable has helped me start connecting. Connections help motivate. Motivation keeps me creating. But, like, also... Sometimes you just gotta fucking do it. 

Belonging.

Naive at thirty-three. The city has made me see how young I must seem to others. My reactions and the way I think. The experiences I thought gave me a proper age have proven that I still have more to explore. I feel nerdy. I feel out of place. I feel like an outsider. I feel young. I feel like I don’t belong. Sometimes. And then I do. Then I feel at home. 

“Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.” -Brené Brown

In the moment of loss, I found the way to find self-acceptance, again. It’s a journey. Didn’t they tell you? Transitions are funny that way. They question who you are and why this change was so important even when you thought you already knew all the answers.

Cacti, Love and Gratitude.

Therapy. “Scheduling before shit hits the fan?” Woah, that sounds way too healthy. “But, you’re right. Wednesday session, three weeks from now?” 

I have a day job. I have a roof over my head. I have reactivated the reason I travelled across country to be in a city that tells it like it is and has a lot of rats to race. It’s gonna be almost three months. Apparently, I am right on schedule.

I am the cliché. 

The little light I do have that seeps through the one window in my closet sized room that faces another wall, surprisingly, now gives me hope. This first New Yorker’s apartment with four other roommates has finally shown it’s charm. Or maybe I have lightened up to see what charm it had all along. 

-A

“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.” -Brené Brown

[drunkbooksellers]

Ep 14: Paul Constant, Seattle Review of Books

Epigraph 

The Drunk Booksellers get stoned on this 4/20 themed episode with Paul Constant of the Seattle Review of Books.

Listen on iTunes, Stitcher, our website, or subscribe using your podcatcher of choice.

This episode is sponsored by Books & Whatnot, the newsletter dedicated to books, bookselling, and bookish folk; check out their newsletter archive here. Follow Books & Whatnot on Twitter at @booksandwhatnot.

If you want to get our show notes delivered directly to your inbox—with all the books mentioned on the podcast and links back to the bookstore we’re interviewing PLUS GIFs—sign up for our email newsletter.

Introduction

In which we make pot jokes and get excited about books

We're switching up our intoxicant of choice this episode and getting stoned rather than drunk (mostly). Paul's rocking Mr. Moxey's Mints (of the peppermint/sativa variety). Emma's smoking CBD (not to be confused with William Steig's children's picture book, CDB!). Kim stops talking while stoned—which would make for a really awkward podcast episode—so she's drinking the hoppiest IPA she could find instead. Everyone's a little too high to explain the varieties of weed particularly well, so you should just read David Schmader's Weed: The User's Guide: A 21st Century Handbook for Enjoying Marijuana.

Paul's Reading:

Up South by Robert Lashley

The Nameless City by Faith Erin Hicks

A collection of books from Mount Analogue Press

Manners by Ted Powers

Final Rose by Halie Theoharides (a comic book tone poem about love and loss made up screenshots from The Bachelor)

Reading Through It book club pick: What We Do Now: Standing Up for Your Values in Trump's America, edited by Dennis Johnson

Emma's Reading:

First Position by Melissa Brayden (thanks to a recommendation from our episode with The Ripped Bodice)

Giant Days 4 by John Allison, Max Sarin, Lissa Treiman, Liz Fleming, and Whitney Cogar

All the Lives I Want: Essays about My Best Friends Who Happen to Be Famous Strangers by Alana Massey (thanks to a recommendation from our episode with Amy Stephenson)

Kim's Reading:

We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Hope in the Dark by Rebecca Solnit

On Tyranny: Twenty Lessons from the Twentieth Century by Timothy Snyder

The Aisles Have Eyes: How Retailers Track Your Shopping, Strip Your Privacy, and Define Your Power by Joseph Turow 

Forthcoming Titles We're Excited For:

You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me by Sherman Alexie (out June 13)

Love and Trouble: a Midlife Reckoning by Claire Dederer (out May 9)

also mentioned Poser: My Life in Twenty-Three Yoga Poses

Theft by Finding: Diaries (1977-2002) by David Sedaris (out May 30)

Hunger: a Memoir of (My) Body by Roxane Gay (out June 13)

Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood (out May 2)

Borne by Jeff VanderMeer (out April 25)

Book of Joan by Lidia Yuknavitch (out April 18)

Woman No. 17 by Edan Lepucki (out May 9)

Isadora by Amelia Gray (out May 23)

Dreaming the Beatles: the Love Story of One Band and the Whole World by Rob Sheffield (out April 25)

Witches, Sluts, Feminists: Conjuring the Sex Positive by Kristen J Sollee (out June 13)

Modern Tarot: Connecting with Your Higher Self Through the Wisdom of the Cards by Michelle Tea (out June 13)

The Perfect Mix: Everything I Know about Leadership I Learned as a Bartender by Helen Rothberg (out June 20)

Chapter I [18:50]

In which we learn what The Seattle Review of Books is, talk about book reviews as a meta art form, and get advice on promoting diversity and being a safe, welcoming place for people who aren't white bros

The Seattle Review of Books is a book news, review, and interviews site. This isn't consumer reports, with a thumbs up or down on each title; each review aims to have a conversation with the book. It's a site that aims to look like your bookshelf, without genre classification.

Emma & Kim don't quite understand Paul's assertion that people don't organize their bookshelves, but we roll with it.

SRB makes all their money through a single sponsor (which changes each week). If you're interested in their sponsorship program, you can learn more here.

Paul wants to promote young, new writers and help them build up their clip file. So you should probably pitch him with your brilliant, bookish ideas. Email submissions@seattlereviewofbooks or fill in the contact form on their about page.

Emma particularly loves the Help Desk by Cienna Madrid. Ask Cienna an awkward book-related question at advice@seattlereviewofbooks.com.

Being a couple of white guys, Paul and his co-founder Martin McClellan are extremely concerned with diverse representation. You can learn more about how SRB encourages diversity in both the books they review and the reviewers they publish on their about page (or by listening to this episode...). But you should know right off the bat, they are not here to promote the new Franzen novel and they will not pander to bros. 

Chapter II [33:10]

In which we talk about life in the US post-election, say something negative about a book, and discuss Paul's past (and current) life as a bookseller

Reading Through It is a post-election book club hosted by Seattle Review of Books, the Seattle Weekly, and Third Place Books Seward Park. They meet the first Wednesday of every month.

On our post-election world, Paul Constant says: "This is what books were made for. Books are engines of empathy... the only way to do a deep-dive into an issue. It's our stored knowledge... This is the moment for books."

The next Reading Through It book group pick is The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt. They'll be meeting Wednesday May 3rd at Third Place Books Seward Park.

Read Paul's article on his time at Borders: Books Without Borders: My Life at the World's Dumbest Bookstore Chain

Though he's not technically a bookseller anymore, Paul is still "on team books." Keep an eye out for our "I'm On Team Books" t-shirts, which may or may not be a thing we sell one day.

Chapter III [43:20]

In which Paul is better at explaining our questions than stoned Emma is at asking them, Emma and Kim give Paul major side-eye due to his bookseller confession, and Emma continues to push Uprooted by Naomi Novik

Desert Island Pick (what would you read that you never had the time to read before): The Years of Lyndon Johnson by Robert Caro (beginning with The Path to Power)

We couldn't find a video of the following clip of Caro on the Colbert Report, so we'll just leave you this series of gifs to explain why you, too, should consider bringing an epic five-volume biography of Lyndon Johnson as your desert beach read:

You're welcome. Now, back to your regularly scheduled show notes. 

Station Eleven Picks (the books to preserve for society) The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne (everything you need to know about living in a society) Great Expectations by Charles Dickens (everything you need to know about life and how it doesn’t always work out the way you want, but you should live it anyway)

Read Paul's essay about The Scarlet Letter, originally written for Scarecrow Video.

Wild Pick (traveling is about observing things... soaking everything in) We Tell Ourselves Stories In Order to Live by Joan Didion ("because she is the greatest observer on the planet and I would want to be like her when I was traveling")

Bookseller Confession  Once again, we have a guest who hasn't read Harry Potter. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? Paul also hasn't read Lord of the Rings and Kim proceeds to side-eye him from across the city.

(In case you were wondering, the title of the direct link to this gif is "wtf-i-cant-even-you-are-stupid." Just sayin'.)

Emma, naturally, tries to convert Paul to fantasy w/ an Uprooted recommendation because "nobody doesn't like it." Paul commits to reading it in order to prove her wrong.

Go-To Handsell  Fup by Jim Dodge Paul saved the book from going out of print and—arguably more importantly—he handsold a copy to Allison Hannigan.

Impossible Handsell  Paradise by AL Kennedy (and everything by AL Kennedy)

Book for Booksellers Saving Capitalism by Robert Reich

Favorite Bookstores Elliott Bay Ada’s Technical Books Third Place Ravenna

Favorite Literary Media

Not to brag, but, we’re the only podcast Paul listens to.

The Rumpus Lit Hub Book Forum Electric Literature Shelf Awareness

Epilogue

In which we tell you where to find us on the Internets

You can find Paul on:

Twitter

Seattle Review of Books is also on Twitter

Seattlereviewofbooks.com

You can find us on:

Twitter at @drunkbookseller

Litsy at @drunkbooksellers

Facebook

Instagram

Email

Newsletter

Website

Emma tweets @thebibliot and writes bookish things for Book Riot.

Kim tweets occasionally from @finaleofseem, but don’t expect too much 'cause she saves all of the interesting (ie. book-related) shizzle for Drunk Booksellers.

Subscribe and rate us on iTunes!

  Check out this episode!

[theartist-duke-nise]

✌🏾Nise Lyfe Movie Part 1

Inspired By Real people, Real Relationships, and Fake Events

INTRO.

*Riding down the street, leaning on window smoking and driving. Credits go by. Flatbush zombies song Bumps. Phone rings, music stops*

Duke: hello??

Greg: Ayo Duke

Duke: Yo wuddup nigga

Greg: Aye bro, you got your strap??

*Duke looks down at cup holder* Duke: Always!

Greg: Listen bro, I need you to come pick me and Mark up rightnow and not ask me any questions.... you down or what??

Duke: .....................where you at??

Black screen

CHAPTER 1: The Story

Female Narrator:

Black Americans ...... Culture.... somehow, for the majority anyways, no matter how much money our parents had... no matter which City, State, neighborhood, or family you come from, our families all have things in common. Have you ever wondered about that?? I mean think about it. Somehow, weather your from Connecticut, New York, Florida, Texas, Cali, Virginia, Illinois, or the Carolinas, we all have fatal similarities without ever meeting or even knowing the same people. Our grandmothers have always told us things like "stop letting all my AC out the house, go fetch me a switch, come here baby, you know grandma loves her baby, stop running around my damn house, I'm praying for you baby" and that world famous, stand on the porch with the sun in her eyes and hands on her hips, wave to watch us drive off from her house. Grandmothers keep the world spinning!! They cook everything with love and have that magic hug and kiss that fuels us like a pump at a gas station. There is truely NOTHING like the love from an elderly women! .... for the majority

Then there are mothers and aunts. The rib of the family. Always putting on fronts when people come around. They can be both your biggest motivator and entagenizor, or both at the same time. They wake you up, get you dressed, feed you, and get you out to school on time day in and day out. They manage a very strict schedule and do it so amazingly. Weather they have a significant other or parental spousal support, they manage with grace and elegance. *Black mother cursing kids out* most of the time anyways.....

And then there are Black Men... the back bone that keeps America standing up straight. The shoulders in which a majority of Americas problems sit on. The brains behind more than 50% of American culture if you ask me. Now I'd like to break the idea if the black man down into 3 categories, which in my opinion isn't exactly fair, because I feel as if all black men share all 3 attributes if enticed to show them in the appropriate time or place.

The first... of-course the typical idealistic black man that Brainwashed America would imagine at first thought. The "GANGSTA". Smh.... typical... This man isn't a bad person. He does bad things from a normal perspective, but no worst than an unordinary American would do. Don't agree?? Well check this... the gangsta sells drugs to the public. Mostly addictive substances to keep his clients hooked, squeezing every silver dime and red penny that they can get out of said person before they either die or overdose.... sound formillior?? Kind of like a Doctor without the license. Cures for things like diabetes, HIV, high blood pressure, cancers, they have been around for years, but we all know there's no economic longevity in corporations curing people. The profits comes from sustaining their illness enough to giving temporary relief of symptoms but not enough to eraticate them. The goal is to keep them coming back..... I.E. "Drug Dealers. Plus ide imagine the "typical" black man would have a bad temper and ofcourse drinks Hennessy and smokes newports all day ".

The second we'll bring up is the "Baby Daddy". Unfortunately this is a legitimate cultural problem for OUR community. Weather the man stays in his child's life as much as anyone would like is besides the point. The biggest problem is that the babies are often made at a young age of the man in which he is not ready to instantly drop the childish antics and mentality at that very moment. Which brings the conflict between said man and the women enpregnated because as females tend to mature faster than males, she is usually raised with a specific image of what a man should be. Her immaturities sway her from being patient enough to help the father of her child to grow into the man he needs to be. The conflicted situation dominos into their split up in which the mother usually takes the custody of the youth, leaving the man to continue exactly where he left off before the pregnancy, living in his immaturities.

And lastly... the comeillian. He isn't a gangster or gangbanger, he doesn't accidentally enpregnate a female before he intends to. He typically is very comfortable being around anyone of any race, religion, or sexual preference. Mentally he feels as if he is a bit of an outcast. He typically has a bit of rebellion in his blood that people find ok, only because he regularly turns it on and off, depending on the environment he is in. I personally like to think of them as an untapped well just under the surface. The possibility of this person swaying into any job, place, environment is up to them. They're just waiting for the decision to be made.

Now on first instinct, Humanity has conditioned us to always look at things as 2 sided. Either right or wrong, good or bad, black or white. But I'm here to show you.... it's much deeper than that. Bad things happen to good people that make bad decisions with good intentions.

Chapter 2: the Team

*Duke pulls up to location, cuts off music, calls greg. Him and mark come out and fast walk to car. They dap up Duke and he pulls off.

Duke: so what niggas bout to do?? We got static??

Greg: nah, but first things first, niggas need to go get some weed. Pull up at Chris crib.

*Duke pulls out blunt and lights it.*

Mark: my nigga, hahaha

*Car pulls up at Chris's house. All three get out of car. Duke pulls gun from cup holder and tucks on waist. Flips shirt over and proceeds to door. SPECIAL KNOCK ON DOOR. Chris comes to door with chinky smile, holds hand out. All 3 greet and walk in. Greg and Mark pull out money hand to Chris and he walks to backroom of apartment. In living room, Dorcey is counting pills and bagging them up. Lean bottles as well as other known drugs cover table. Dorcey sees us and daps us up while still counting, trying not to loose count. All 3 sit down. Duke pulls out another blunt and sparks it.*

Duke: so bro, what's tha move?? Why I need strap.??

*Greg and Mark look at eachother*

Greg: go on and tell him about your boy.

Mark: aight, so me and this nigga was walking down the street by my crib, by the park and we smell weed in the air, so I look across the street and we see this tall ass nigga walking, smoking a blunt.

*Greg interrupts*

Greg: bro... that nigga was tall as shit.

Mark: word, so I yell out "that shit smell good bro" and he reply "I got that if you need it homie. Just got a pack in today."

*Dorcey stops counting and looks up

Dorcey: so y'all don't know this nigga from nowhere and he stay on yo block Mark??

Greg: aye bro, I ain't never even seen this nigga before and I use to stay out there too. Maby he just moved out there or something..

*Chris comes back and hands mark and greg their bags of weed and tosses a pack of backwoods on their laps, then takes a pack of papers out of his pocket and tosses that too. Chris says jokingly*

Chris: so we gona rob this nigga??

*chris cheeses hard*

Mark: ayo, can I finish tellin the fuckin story??

Dorcey: as long as you can roll up and talk at the same time.

*Duke shakes his head and grins*

Greg: so boom. Long story short, we ask the nigga to get us a 8th. He tells us to just walk to his house to get it with him..... bro. We walk in and this nigga has EVERYTHING!!! Coke, heron, Molly, pills, x, xans, liq, syrup....

*Dorcey and Duke both focus up

Duke ashes the blunt and passes it*

Duke: GTFOH

Dorcey: well what tha fuck we sittin here for?? Let's go get at that nigga.

Greg: see y'all niggas ain't letting us finish.... so we walk in and see all the drugs, then this big ass pit runs up.

Chris: that nigga jump on Mark?? You know that nigga smell like beef jerkey.

*Chris smiles hard again. Mark rolling the blunt looks up*

Mark: nah, they had this nigga on a leash..... INSIDE THE CRIB BRO. They had that nigga INSIDE THE CRIB bro!! Like a whole bear on a leash inside the crib bro. Like these niggas had the chain wrapped around the Middle of the piece of wood going from the ceiling to the floor in the living room b. I ain't gona lie bro. That nigga was big as fuck.

Duke: damn, so what happen next??

Greg: so boom. He tell the nigga to sit and he sit instantly. Not like Boosie.... OH SHIT!!! Yea bro, so his bowls are behind him and I peep a big bloody piece of meat in the bowl, so I ask dude, "ayo, that's steak and pepper you feed your dog?" aye bro.... nigga looks at me and says "Nah homie, that's a human kidney and gun powder on that shit. I bought it using Big Coins."

Chris: get the fuck out of here bro

Greg: swear to god bro. He said it's so that nigga don't mind killing and ripping a nigga apart. Shit was crazy but anyways, so boom we walk past the dog and I think that was his pops or his uncle in the back with his girl and a few more niggas. And we meet them niggas, chop it up for about 5 minutes but we end up only buying a blunt. We told him we wanted to see if it was some flame. It was so we told him we're gona go get some more money and be back to get more than a half.

Dorcey: aye bro, please tell me y'all tryna rob this nigga bro!!

Duke: nigga, ain't you JUST come home?? your still on supervised probation nigga.

Dorcey: and I'm ready to go back so what you sayin??

Mark: Aye look, me and greg already said we GATA hit that nigga so we down.

Chris: and I'm down. Sheed lost $600 last week when somebody stole her purse so I'm down. I need a come up cuz rents due next month.

Dorcey: so Duke, you got the whip so your driver.. and I know your klizzy ass got a few masks..

Duke: you already know

Dorcey: So what you gona do?? You down or what??

*Everyone freezes and stares at Duke. He hits the blunt, looks at it as he inhales, sits it in the ash trey and blows the smoke out. Duke takes gun from pants and drops it on table.*

Duke: we gona need some more heat...

CHAPTER 3: THE PLAN

Greg: aight, so it's a lock.

Duke: aye, I just have 1 condition.

Dorcey: NOOOO NIGGA, we not wearing no super hero masks. Lol, goof ass nigga

*everyone laughs except Duke. His face is stiff

Duke: chill... but first, nobody gets killed bro!! I ain't going down for murder!! Especially if my ass ain't squeezing a trigger.

Greg: FACTS!!! If it's our life or there's, that's one thing, but I can't do life. I got daughters nigga. I can live with 5-10 though. Can y'all??

Dorcey: word! I got a seed too nigga. I GATA be here for baby girl, but I need paper for baby girl too!

*everyone nods their heads agreeing*

Duke: good. And second. We need another car. Y'all niggas tweeked if y'all think I'm using MY car to hit a lick! Like y'all really bugged out on that!!

Dorcey: nigga, shut yo ass down! Just get a rental, or a zip car or sum shit. When we get close enough, we cover the plates and the.... got damn, what you call that shit on the car... like what kinda car it is?!?

Chris: the emblem

Dorcey: YEA!!! Just make sure it's a dark color...

Duke: aight, well before we jump the gun, let's really make a plan!! Ayo, Chris, you got some paper and pencil??

Mark: so y'all niggas about to write down our plan so the boys can find it?? Smh, dumb ass niggas

Duke: chill out string bean head ass... that's why we're writing it with paper and pencil. we destroy the papers the day before we hit tha jawn kuz by then, we'll have everything in our heads. This is just so we're on the same page. And another thing... don't be stupid enough to talk or text about this shit... like EVER!!!! AT ALL!!! Any discussion we have about this is in person, face to face only! Agreed?

*everyone nods again*

Duke: ok, now first things first. Mark, why tha fuck you still ain't finish rollin up and greg what you waitin to light that shit for?? You waiting on Jesus second coming?? Lml, but on a serious note now. How big was the crib??

*greg lights blunt, takes pull and passes it

Greg: what you mean??

Duke: like what kinda house was it?? Like a 2 story?? 1 story?? Trailer?? Town house?? What??

Mark: uhhhh. Townhouse... 2 story though...

Duke: aight, how many bedrooms??

Mark: idk, prolly 2-3...

Duke: and how many couches downstairs

Mark: 2... a small one and a big one... why does that matter??

Duke. Because nigga, 1 master bed room means a dope boy prolly keeps a bitch at his crib, plus the other 2 rooms means 1 person can live in each. That's 4 people that can live upstairs. Plus 1 person sleeping on the big couch. They prolly try to keep 2 or 3 people home at all times. We need to either wait until they all leave, which might never happen, or we can get everyone out of the house. Now New Years is in 2 weeks. No real niggas stay in the house on New Years! They're either outside selling drugs, tryna get em off, OR they're out partying, using drugs. That's when we get em.... plus Erica having some kinda party for New Years. I figure we all hit that shit first. Take a bunch of pictures, give her our phones, and I'll get her to text from them and post pictures every few minutes. Perfect alliby. We have pictures and texts as proof of where we are. Plus the location on our phones to verify.

Dorcey: damn nigga... how long you been waiting to rob somebody?? Nigga already have everything planned out!

Duke: nah bro. I'm just going with this shit. I ain't never caught a lick in my life. I'm just smart enough to pay attention to how people get caught and learn from there mistakes so I don't have to make my own.

*duke points to the top of his head*

Duke: 2 steps ahead bro.... Now, we can assign jobs... I say, Dorcey, you should be the one to see if you can get some more hammers. 1 damn sure ain't gona be safe, especially kuz ain't nobody holding my shit except me. My shit is registered...

Dorcey: say less

Duke: now... Greg and Chris, y'all take Chris's car back over to fuckboys crib, park far enough to where they won't notice you but don't be hot and spook the neighbors either. Last thing niggas need is the cops called on y'all to looking suspicious. Take this paper and a pen or something and write down what kinda traffic they have. home many people come in and out. How many are plucks and how many live there. How long they stay there and how long they leave before coming back. Which ones drive and get picked up. And what time people stop coming and going. That's prolly what time they sleep. And since greg is blind as fuck, Chris your gona be the eyes so take som carrots.

Greg: fuck you

Chris: carrots??

Duke: yea... good for eyesight. And greg, you just write down what you s..... well you write down what Chris sees. lol,

Greg: nigga fuck you. Give me the damn paper

*greg snatches paper from Duke

Duke: and me and Mark will pick up the clothes and masks. Here everyone write down shirt and pants sizes so we don't forget.... Everybody good??

*everyone agrees

Duke: good, now somebody help this nigga mark finish rollin up, kuz he's blowing mines.

Mark: nigga fuck up, I been done. Lol

Chapter 4: Dorcey

The next morning, Dorcey wakes up in his bed with naked female next to him sleep. He moves her hand off of him and tosses it, rolls over, and picks up his phone and sits on the edge of his bed stretching.

*Dorcey grabs bottle of Hennessy, and takes gulp. Then finds contact and calls

Kev: yo wuddup

Dorcey: Yooooooooo

Kev: wuddup fool?

Dorcey: aye bru, I need a few tools, niggas bout to build a bridge.

Kev: what kinda tools you need?? Wrenches or Drills??

Dorcey: nah , wrenches is good. It's more for emergency.

Kev: aight, you need more than 1??

Dorcey: I need 4

Kev: damn nigga! Fuck I look like?? Home Depot?? You need em for the keep or the rent??

Dorcey: the rent

Kev: for how long?

Dorcey: prolly just one night.

Kev: well this ain't no free ride homie. Ima need some collateral or sumn nigga.

*Dorcey thinks as he scans his room then stops when he locks onto the naked girls head in his bed*

Dorcey: I think I got sumn you'll like bru

Kev: aight, when you gona slide threw??

Dorcey: give me 2-3 hours bru

Kev: aight bet... just come around the back

Dorcey: aight bet

Dorcey and female walk threw cut into back of Kevs house trying not to step in dog shit. They knock on sliding back door. Kev walks up, peeps out back window with Rifel in hand.

Dorcey: yoooooo

*Kev sits gun on couch and unlocks screen door and opens. Dorcey and female walk in and close behind them.

Dorcey: aight Kev this MeeMee... MeeMee this my nigga Kev

Kev: what's up shorty??

MeeMee: hey

Dorcey: aight you can sit here for a minute. Watch out for the gun. And don't answer the door for nobody.

*Dorcey turns to Kev

Dorcey: aight, lemme see what you got bru.

Kev: aight bro, follow me

*they small talk as they walk to back room

Dorcey: yea bro that bitch ready..... Daaaaaammmmmmnnnnn.

*dorceys eyes wide and jaw drops

Dorcey: nigga..... what tha fuck you this strapped up for?? Nigga got enough guns to lock up the whole neighborhood! Every thing between 2'2s and 45s. Then machine guns, choppas, shotguns.. you got the double actions, single loads, pumps, twin barrels.... nigga got aks, m-14....ohh shit, tha m-16. Aye bro, you got tha baby K??

*kev smiles and points

Kev: yea right there by the rifles.

Dorcey: daaammmnnn, and you got the crazy ass monkey nuts. How much this bitch hold??

Kev: 200+1 in the chamber

Dorcey: this nigga said plus 1 in the chamber...

*Dorcey shakes his head*

Dorcey: but back to business. I can get 2 30's and a 9 and a pump?

Kev: gochu.. you need bullets and packs too??

Dorcey: yea. Just a clip for each tool and 7 or 8 shells for the pump.

Kev: ohh, y'all movin light huh??

Dorcey: yea bruh, hopefully we don't even GATA bust nun.. but better safe then sorry, na mean??

Kev: I feel you bro..... aye before you leave, you GATA check this shit my whiteboy just brought me.

*kev pops a lock on the dresser and takes out a RPG

Dorcey: a RPG?? Nigga, who tha fuck you got beef with?? North Korea??

*Kev smiles slyly

Kev: Better safe than sorry. Haha

Dorcey: heard you. But good looks bro.

*Kev packs guns into a bag that looks like it's used for a tent or something, then they dap eachother up and Dorcey walks out

Kev: good luck bro.

*Dorcey nods

Chapter 5: Greg & Chris

*Greg wakes up on couch, reaches on table for glasses. Get up and yawns. Knocks on Chris's door to wake up.

Chris: yea, I'm up

Greg: I can use the bathroom??

Chris: yea.

*greg uses bathroom, gets dressed. Knocks on Chris's door

Greg: you ready bro??

Chris: yea give me like 10 more minutes

Greg: aight

*greg sits on couch and lights clipped blunt and scrolls down twitter feed

*Chris comes out room and greg gets up passes blunt as the walk out house to car. They get into car and door closes. Drive to work playing music. Get out of car at work, dap eachother and walk away. *Cut To End Of Work Day*

Greg: wuddup bro??

Chris: what's up brooo??

*Chris cheeses hard

Greg: aye bro, you tryna head over to scope out that crib for a little before we go home??

Chris: yea bro, I don't care. But all the weed is at the house. You want to go get some first??

*Greg pulls jar from glove compartment

*chris cheeses hard and pulls off while greg rolls up.

Greg: so bro, I been thinking about how niggas gona split up all this shit.. or even, you know like... what if they sold everything by the time we get there??

Chris: yea bro, that would be fucked up, haha. But if they got that much stuff in their house, I doubt they would let it run out. Haha

Greg: yea, you right. But idk bro. I kinda got a bad feeling about this shit. I aint tryna jinx it or nun though.

Chris: bro, don't even think like that dude. Positive thoughts, positive vibes, you know??

Greg: yea, word... pass me the lighter

*they pull up at the end of the block.

Chris: oh shit bro, look

Greg: nigga, you know I can't see all the way down there.

Chris: ohh shit my bad bro, lol

Greg: what you see?

Chris: it's like 4 females outside

*greg starts writing on paper*

Chris: 6 cars in front. But there just standing at the car. Shit that's a really nice car bro. Ohh, wait... like 4 guys just walked out the house and got in the cars. They're pulling off now... duck down

*both duck down in seats. Greg blows smoke up

Greg: shit my bad

*both sit back up

Chris: aye bro, another car just pulled up.. it kinda looks like an über.

Greg: you sure it's an Über and not just a regular car??

Chris: we duhh it's a regular car, but it has an über sticker on the window and it's just siting outside with the car still running.

Greg: yea it's prolly an über

Chris: ok, now there's an older guy and an older chick getting in the über. And it's driving off in the opposite direction.

Greg: should we follow them??

Chris: fuck that!! I need to go home and take a shower. Get out these clothes.

Greg: it don't matter to me bro

*greg takes out his phone and called Duke

Duke: wuddup blacky??

Greg: ayo, we here now. Everybody just left the house I think.

Duke: You gona follow em to see where they go??

Greg: chris said fuck that..

Duke: exhale... y'all niggas kill me... but aight

Greg: aye, I ain't even driving

Duke: aight I'll halla at y'all niggas later

Greg: bet

*Car pulls off*

Chapter 6: Duke & Mark

*Duke is at 7-11 pumping gas. Cute women next to him pumping gas looks over and smiles. He finishes pumping his gas, puts cap on tank, gets phone out of car, cutting off music and walks around pump to her

Duke: excuse me, how are you doing today??

Lady: I'm fine.

Duke: well my names Duke. Um... would you mind if I help you pump your gas for you.

Lady: not at all

*she steps back and I squeeze the trigger of the gas pump. As I glance back I start at her feet. Pretty toes, red polish, red pumps, and long fitting red dress showing amazing curves. Going up to her amazing smile surrounded my red lipstick.

Duke: so I didn't get your name.

Lady: ohh, lol, my names Jazmine, with a Z... not a S

Duke: ok, very nice to meet you jazmine with a Z.... not an S... lol. You mind if I ask how old you are??

[decadenttimetravelmentality-blog]

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I want to insure my trike,anybody know a good and cheap insurance company....thanks!!..?""

My insurance company doesnt want to pay!!?

I was struck by an uninsured driver on 02-10-11. Because the driver who struck me was uninsured I was forced to file a claim with my insurance company(Omni Insurance). The car was towed to CJ's collision at 6128 n beechwood Philadelphia, pa ,19138 on 02-11-11. Phone number 215-848-2836. On 02-14-11 Omni insurance sent out an appraiser to evaluate the vehicle. They then faxed an estimate on 02-15-11 totaling $5300 to CJ's collision shop. I went to the collision shop on 02-15-11 to sign paperwork giving them permission to work on my car. They then began the repairs. On 02-18-11 the insurance company then deemed my car a total loss. The vehicle is a 2005 Nissan Altima SL with 96,477 miles. The NADA value for the vehicle is 10,995. According to Omni insurance a car is deemed a total loss when the repairs reach 70% of the value of the vehicle. Omni insurance valued my car at 7,415. They then proposed a settlement offer of 5826.40. They deducted 975.00 in prior damages(which I disagree with) and 1000.00 my deductible. The settlement offer included 386.40 in sales tax. After negotiating on 02-28-11 they proposed an offer of 7835.30. The value they gave my car was 9255. Again 975.00 was deducted and my 1000.00 deductible. They including sales tax and tags/registration fee in the offer. I accepted the offer out of desperation because they also stopped paying for the rental car I was driving on 02-28-11. I work, attend school and have a child my schedule requires that I have a car so I paid out of pocket for a rental car until 03-07-11, expecting the payment to be issued to my lien holder by then so I could purchase another car. I contacted them on 03-07-11 inquiring about my payment and was informed they did not pick the vehicle up from the collision shop therefore they were not issuing a payment. The collision shop gave them a bill of 1750.00 for the repairs they did and the storage fees. The insurance company disagrees with this and refuses to pick the vehicle up and issue my payment. They have also stated this may come out of my settlement offer. The insurance company already has the title to the car and all the necessary paperwork to the vehicle but refuses to issue a payment. It has been a month since I filed my claim and I can no longer afford to pay for a rental especially since it seems I will have to purchase a new vehicle. The insurance company is low balling me and also forcing me to pay for repairs they approved then backed out of.""

Auto Insurance quote...please help!?!?!?

My sisters insurance..we live in CA by the way..has 2 cars insured. Her total premium for 6 months is 541 but we pay 114 a month. How did they get that monthly payment? If she was to add me to her policy the premium would go up 2 $740. My question is how much would the monthly payment turn out to be????

Car crash not my fault. Will it affect the cost of my insurance?

A guy crashed into me the other day, admitted it was completely his fault. I contacted a legal firm who talks to my insurance company and the other guys insurers. He has said I did nothing wrong and it was completely his fault. Will the cost of my insurance go up because of this? Or will there be no change as I was not at fault?""

Whats the best life insurance.?

i am looking for a good life insurance but the market is so full and confusing.

Need a group for medical insurance?

Employer offers very skimpy medical insurance. Individual (i.e., non-group) insurance is very expensive. I have heard that groups have been formed so that members will qualify for group rates. Please tell which groups these are, and what you know about them. Many thanks.""

How much would it cost to add me as an occasional driver?

If I get a new car and its under my mom's name but I'm listed as an occasional driver wouldnt that be way less expensive than having my own insurance which would cost about $1500? I'd only be driving the car to and from school and occasionally out to the movies or something. So would that work?

How much roughly would it cost to be on provisional insurance on my sisters corsa?

How much roughly would it cost to be on provisional insurance on my sisters corsa?

Impaired driving conviction effects on insurance in Utah?

Okay so I was originally charged with DUI because I was pulled over for swerving a bit and failed a urine test for weed at the police station, but had no drugs in my blood, which meant I was not under the influence at the time of driving. Unfortunately, in the state of Utah there is also a charge for Driving with Any Measurable Metabolites of a Controlled Substance. This charge has the pretty much the same mandatory minimum sentencing requirements of a DUI. My charge was reduced to Impaired Driving, which does not have the mandatory SR-22 filing and enhancements upon a third conviction as the aforementioned, but I have court tomorrow morning to be convicted of Impaired Driving, and I was wondering how much my insurance may go up??? It is only $46.67 a month right now... Also, how often might my insurance company check my record? It is really pretty freakin' lame I think because dirty urine but not blood means I could of smoked weed like 29 days ago and still had the damn metabolites in my urine right? Anyway, any knowledgeable input or prior experience would be greatly appreciated... Thank you very much in advance.""

What is the cheapest possible insurance available?

Including the cheapest car to insure and the best way to go about insuring that car. What is the cheapest insurance i can get? Thanks for any help

Can a named driver get covered for business insurance on the policy insurance company sayin no is this correct?

Can a named driver get covered for business insurance on the policy insurance company sayin no is this correct?

Afforable Health insurance?

I'm 19 years old, I work a part time job and I need health insurance. The cheapest I saw was Blue cross blue care and it was $95 a month and 30 copay. Is there anything cheaper I ...show more""

I just got into a car accident and whats going to happen if i dont have insurance for that car?

Okay so on Monday, I was parked on one side of the street and because of street cleaning I uturned across the street into two other cars that were parked and some lady backed up trying to park in thee space that i was in. she did not look back i guess. It's clearly her fault but the thing is that that car does not have insurance. My other 3 cars are insured just that one is not because my brother gave it to me to sell. I am wondering what is going to happen because she reported to insurance. Wiill i get in trouble? ( I'm under 18) Do i get money from her insurance company? Will I have to pay for her damages even though it was 100% her fault? and what do i do now? Her insurance agent called me but i called back and cannot get a hold of her. Thanks for the help""

My wife backed our truck into a parked car how does the insurance deductabe work?

like i said she backed into someone (her fault) do i pay the insurance deductible up front before they will fix their car and how will my insurance rates be affected by this (state farm). this would be our first claim ever and ive had the policy for around 8 years.

Where can I get some cheap health/maternity insurance?

My husband and I have been talking about wanting to have a baby. He missed his enrollment period (again) at work and isn't eligible until September 2008. I looked into individual, but it is SO expensive.""

How can I put my girlfriend (8 1/2 years and still going strong) on my health/dental insurance?

Hi guys, so I have asked my job and it seems the only way I can add her to my health/dental insurance is if 1) we are married or 2) if i provide proof of living with her for a certain amount of years. There has to be some loophole because I really think it is ridiculous that we have been to together since we were 16 and I cant add her or help her in such a way. There is no possible way, in timeline, for us to qualify for such rules. 16-18 years old (in high school and lived with parents), 18-23 years old (Attended separate universities and lived in different cities), 23- 24 1/2 years old, (both living with parents back home, we alternate and stay at each others place, so have no set home or bills in our name, such as direct tv, electricity, internet, you name it. we are blessed with awesome parents) and yes we have though about just getting married, but no way... we are waiting until we are established and can fend for ourselves to make a decision like that, but yes we do want to get married some day, but not over screwing the government or other reasons. Also we live in california if that helps, since i know every state varies, thank s guys!! ^_^""

Why does car insurance cost more on a black car?

Why does car insurance cost more on a black car?

How do you know if you qualify for Medicaid?

How much do you have to make be eligible for your baby to be placed in the Medicaid Insurance when born? And, is it easy to get or is there usually a long wait or anything? Thanks :)""

What R some other ways I can to lower my insurance rate?

What R some other ways I can to lower my insurance rate?

Car Insurance for a Corsa?

I am 18 had a license less that a year and I'm employed what would be the cheapest insurance for for a 1.6 vauxhal corsa?

Cheap Car insurance...............?

im 19 living in england just held my license for a week now. im being quoted 4 and half grand insurance on a 1.4 civic. that is bullshit. does anybody know a cheap insurance legit one? i need to start driving ASAP.

Does anyone else have USAA insurance?

When do I get my insurance card

insurance quote report accident

insurance quote report accident

""6008 insurance quote for hyundai getz 1.1, what am i doin wrong?""

im a 17 year old male, who lives in a nice area with little crime, it will be kept on the drive, im offering 500 excess, third part only, i cant belive this price from go-compare, and this was the cheapest quote, what else can i try, ive tried putting my mum on as a named driver, but it only lowers it by about 100.""

What is the medical exam and questions for life insurance like?

We are looking into life insurance. I am wondering what the medical exam and questions are like? How much more typically is it if you have a medical issue (like high blood pressure) compared to if you have good health? We are in our late 20's.

Can i canel my ex-partners car insurance?

A month before we split up my ex but a whole years car insurance on my credit card. Now we are apart, and i have asked her to get a credit to refund as i dont drive and dont have the means to pay for this? Am i being unreasonable, she has said as we were together it is irrelevant, but as i havent paid for it yet and its essentially a pre-payment what should i do? It was made in my name (the payment) so can i simply unmake it?""

""I was in a catastrophic car accident, can I sue my own insurance company?""

In 2010 I was in a catastrophic car accident on a state road. I lost control of my car and it rolled 3 times and I was ejected from the vehicle . I am blessed to be alive but had a laundry list of injuries. I was life flighted to the nearest trauma center and was in the ICU for 2 weeks and then the step down unit for a month. I had 7 broken ribs, 2 collapsed lungs, skull fracture, blew out my orbital floor, broken cheek bone, broken nose, shattered my left shoulder, and broke my back in 4 places. I am lucky to say that I am not paralyzed but it was a long recovery for my back. I still have a list of surgeries ahead of me. Since I was no in an accident with another vehicle can I sue my own car insurance (I have full tort)? How much do you think someone could get? I am not being greedy I have a lot of bills in front of me and not working is taking a toll on me.""

My car insurance renewal is due next week can anyone suggest cheap?

I'ave got 3 years no claim bounus my old insurare is asking 392

Best insurance policy for girl child?

I have two daughters of 17 and 13 years age. Is there any insurance policy I can now join for these girls for their studies and marriage? thank you

16 year old insurance question?

i dont wanna hear the bs about only a agent can quote me i want a average of the cost for a 16 year old male! driving a old truck with driver ed paper saying that i passed umm i exspect it to be 100$ monthly?

How much would insurance be a month for a 1988 ford mustang gt for a 16 year old driver in ny?

hi i want a 1988 ford mustang gt 5.0 and i am 16 years old. i was wondering how much the insurance would cost a month. im in new york and plz no answers like alot or anything like that just an estimate. pl answer and thankyou

Help with Car Insurance/License!?!?

Okay, so I'm a 17 year old girl in michigan. I am planning to take my road test soon and then get my license. I have divorced parents and my grandfather on my moms side is going to buy me a car and keep it in his name. He is going to put me as the primary driver on this car and pay for the insurance. However; I live with my dad and therefore my address on my license will be at my dad's house, since you have to have proof of residency when you go to secretary of state. My dad has been extremely annoying about this situation, saying that his car insurance will go up since I live here, so I need to know if it will or not. The people I have talked to so far say that it won't since I am not a driver on his car or his wife's. I've been wanting to get my license so I can get a job and whatnot for over a year now, so please help me with your experience. Thank You :)""

Paying my car insurance off early?

I have the cash to do so. And i only owe about 200 cause i already paid 2 months off early. But im jw when the next bill will be so i dont have to worry about. If it helps any i have the general car insurance they are local so idk if itll help lol

Which Insurance?

If someone borrows my car but they have their own insurance and get in an accident is their insurance company responsible

What is the cheapest car and home insurance?

The car insurance would cover for 2 people, me and my mother. The home insurance would be for our apartment. She asked me to look this up for her and I have no idea where to start. A little guidance would be great? Thanks :]""

Does anyone know any insurance places in california that you can get insurance for your car without a DL?

I can't get my drivers license without insurance and I can't get insurance without a drivers license. anyone know a way around this? please don't say use a friend or family members car. I really don't have anyone besides myself. I tried looking into drivers schools, but they cost 250 +. is there any insurance places that will give me insurance with a permit??""

Car insurance for 17 year old?

my son will be driving my car for a couple times, so do i have to put him as a name under my insurance? and if i get him a car in a few months what is a reliable insurance company that is affordable?""

""Response Insurance, Need Customer Reviews?

http://www.response.com I recently checked the following for my auto insurance & they have good rates available but I have never heard of them. Is there any place I can get the customer review for this company? Or if you have dealt with this company please let me know your experience?

Car insurance question?

i was just wondering...if you chose to pay off car insurance all in one do you pay it off as soon as you get insurance or do you pay after the year is over ?

Who has the cheapest car insurance?

Who has the cheapest car insurance?

To HOLD a California Drivers License is it required to have insurance?

Argument with a coworker

How long can you go without health insurance before things become preexisting ?

I currently have health insurance through my father's company plan, but after my 19th birthday my insurance drops because I won't be a full time student until spring this year. Meanwhile I need coverage through some plan so nothing will be preexisting. However I can't apply for the cheap insurance that I was hoping for until my old coverage ends, and I'm worried about the bureaucratic time lapse between coverage policies. Are there any problems I'm going to run into with this?""

How much would car insurance cost me?

Im a 25 year old male and i just got my drivers license. What is the cheapest auto insurance i could get so i can legally drive? What rates would a person such as myself have? Good college student, no criminal history. if that matters. Thank you.""

Want to cancel my whole life insurance?

Back in July 09, I let my stepmother's boyfriend create a life insurance policy for me. He works as an agent for New York Life, and since I know nothing about insurance, I just let him take care of everything. For personal reasons, I want to cancel the insurance. I will get something else, probably term, very soon. I just still know nothing about insurance, so I have a few questions about my policy. I do have whole life insurance, so I should be able to get some money back, right? Currently, I have a $50k plan, and I pay just under $50 a month. I got this policy when I was 18, so the monthly cost seems a little high--especially since I have no dependents or debt. If I die tomorrow, I could still get a really nice funeral (not that I want one) and have it all payed in full from the money I have from my inheritance. Was I ripped off or is this pretty standard? Online, it says my Net Cash Value is $37.97. Is this the money I get back if I cancel? It seems low--it's only about 3.2% of the total amount I've paid. I was expecting some amount closer to 10%. Ideally, I'd like to cancel without talking to my agent. Is there any way I could do it through a general agent or online?""

My mom is 84 and has trouble paying her supplemental insurance at 225 per month. What can she do?

Where can she find affordable medicare supplemental insurance. She now has Blue Cross and Blue Shield of Illinois and she no longer can afford it. Thanks for your help.

Young Driver Insurance?

Ok, here's what's going on. i am basically a new driver and have passed my test 18 march last year. the time has come for me getting a car, however the insurance premiums are ridiculously high. I have used the comparing websites, but they offer no real result, so I phoned a few up. This is what they gave me, I was asking for a quote, on an 04 Renault Clio 1.2 Dynamic with 3 doors. Co-operative insurance 4645 (Full Comp) Direct line Over 3000(Full Comp) (they wouldn't give an accurate result, I'd have to be transferred onto another dept.) Quinn Direct 6000 (Third party, Fire & Theft only, i was then informed that their premiums where increased) All in my own name and not under any parents, however it seems like the best option at the moment. I do know about a few companies that specialise in young driver insurance, one called Young Marmalade and another called i-Kube. Both are cheaper, but there are catches to policies, i-Kube requires you to have a GPS tracker fitted, if you drive passed 11PM at night a 100 Penalty is incurred, and for each night you drive past said time. with young marmalade you need to have the pass plus scheme. I also know that premiums are subject to a post code area rating. (CH 62) so if anyone could tell me where cheap insurance for this type of car is I would be great-full.""

How much would it cost to get a car?

Im 17 and have applied for my practical test but once i pass how much will it cost to get a car, insurance, tax and MOT. im not looking for a great car just a small car, a polo would be nice.""

""Young married couple, low cost health insurance with Rx?""

I'm going to get married soon (not RLY soon but i have to start thinking about some things in advance) and I have to get health insurance. I'm really confused by it but I've been doing some reading about it and some figures about the kind of finances we are going to have and all I really know at this point is that we can't afford more than 200 dollars per month and that has to include prescriptions and everything. My soon to be husband is really healthy, only real issue is near-sightedness. I'm a little more sickly, I have asthma and allergies and the same eye problems. I keep them all pretty much under control but I need my meds. What plan would be best for us so that we can keep costs low and still get me my Rx?""

insurance quote report accident

insurance quote report accident

How much would car insurance cost with a 2008 kia optima im 17 years old?

i get my lisence in 2 months i live in south florida and im gunna have to pay for my insurace so i need to know so i know how much im gunna have to work

Ive been looking into pet insurance and Im a bit confused.?

Ive been looking into pet insurance and Im a bit confused. When it says: wellness exam (split between two visits per year) $40 vaccinations $30 heartworm test $25 fecal test $15 deworming $20 microchip $20 flea and/or heartworm preventive $50 blood screen or x-ray or EKG $50 Is the dollar amount the price the insurance pays all year or per visit?

New Car/ New insurance...need it immediately?

I will be buying a car on Sunday. I am under my parent's insurance right now but will be getting my own when I get the new car. Do I need to get the new insurance policy before driving the car off the lot? How can I do this without the VIN number? I live in Florida.

Where can i get individual health insurance for me and my daughter that also covers pregnancy in connecticut?

I need to get health insurance for me and my 1 year old daughter. I am planning on becoming, or possibly already am pregnant but need insurance for us. Any help? This is in CT, so it is a state that does not require individual policies to cover pregnancy.""

What is an insurance deductible?

What exactly is a medical insurance deductible?

Is there a cheap insurance company for teen driver?

My mom cant drive... so she doesnt know much about insurance. Im about to get my license and I was wondering if there's a type of insurance that is cheap and not too pricey... specially with a mom who doesn't have a high paying job?!?! I live in Texas if that helps

Can insurance company tell you were you can have your car fixed?

I have had a few cases were a relative has been in an auto accident and I could have fixed the car for them and done a much better job but the insurance company tells them they have to take the car to a preferred body shop for the insurance to pay. Can the insurance company actually tell people were to get their car fixed now a days? Is there a way to get the money out of the insurance company so they can take the car and have it fixed were they want the car fixed?

Do I qualify for unemployment insurance in California?

I worked a full time temp job that only lasted 4 months. From May to September. I m wondering if that is enough to qualify for unemployment insurance in California?

Average Insurance Price For 08 Ninja ZX10r?

I am 21 years old and was thinking of buying a new zx10. Its 999 cc's, i dont have any violations within 3 years i have a garage and practically no crime neighborhood. The reason im asking is ive done 4 online quotes and they are all like 500 a month which is impossible to afford. Im just looking for the least possible amount if any one has any helpful info id appreciate your feedback.""

Car insurance for a teen?

I was wondering if a minor can have their own insurance plans, like not under their parents name? And what is a good company for car insurance for teens (cheap) ? Thanks!""

How can I get the lowest car insurance payment?

I am 25. I want to buy a cheap car with one way insurance. thanks a lot

Car Insurance for 16 Year old Boy in CA?

I am looking to buy a car, I had a list of all these cars... but then when I had a quote put on them... I was shocked. I was looking at BMW 325i, Jeep Cherokee, and Mitshubishi Montero... each costing around 2500 for full coverage. What car brand or type would have a relatively low insurance cost for my age and gender group?""

Teen car insurance price?

I want an idea of my monthly insurance cost now that I have my license and a car. Here are the details I'm male and 16 years old I live in the North Hills outside of Pittsburgh (pretty basic suburbs) The car is a '93 Pontiac grand am. 90k miles on the engine I'm the third owner Good condition with some rust just starting to form on the wheel wells I am the primary driver It is usually kept outside

I let my car insurance lapse....will i get in trouble?

my car insurance is lapsed right now. i know when you sign up for insurance they always ask its been lapsed. when i say yes, which i ll tell the truth cuz they ll find out anyways, what will they do? will i be in trouble?""

What's a classic British car that's cheap and insurable for a learner?

Cheaper than a mini or morris minor.

Car insurance for minors?

Abt how much would insurance cost me. Am 17 wit a drivers licence and I live in Texas ? Thanks:)

What is the safest cheapest car to buy and also for cheapest insurance as a first car?

What is the safest cheapest car to buy and also for cheapest insurance as a first car?

Whats the Cheapest Motorcycle to insurance for 2014?

Hello, I am researching on what is the cheapest motorcycle to insure this year. I'm also curious what is a good bike for a beginning rider. I've been looking at a couple of questions regarding this subject, and I notices some of these questions are a few years back. I am curious to know, because I am considering getting a bike. But before I can, I want to get all my ducks in a row, and research as much as I can, so I can make the best possible decision. Further details on myself. I'm a male, age 24, I have my driver licenses, I live in California, but I barely have any driver experiences. Not even a year worth. So I'm already predicting the rate will be high for me. In every sense of the word I am a novice. So any helpful tips for a person just starting out to ride motorcycles, would greatly be appreciated. Also Bonus What Insurance should I look for, for a beginner like me?""

Insurance rates were lower in california - for car?

i always have a california car insurance and see that it is always lower when compared to other states.. why is that.. on the other hand,i have always heard that car gettting stolen is highest in californiaso so i guess the insurance premium should be higher then why""

How do you figh no insurance ticket?

if you get into an accident without insurance, how do you fight it both the police and the insurance.""

Insurance- dui-?

if i get convicted of a dui- my insurance will go up correct, the question i have is how long will i be paying the higher premium? 10 years? 5 years? 1 year? and also what is the avergae price it goes up considering i am 23 years old no tickets or accidents till the dui accident(hit a tree) live in southern california and drive a mustang gt i pay 160 with the accident right now(i think i paid 100-125ish before the accident. thanks""

Help with car insurance please :)?

Around how much would car insurance for a 'W REG VW BEETLE 3 DOOR HATCH BACK 2.0L PETROL' be? I am a young driver too. Thank you :)

Does anyone know of an affordable insurance company for an individual (major insur. companies preferrably)?

I am an individual contractor and in need of a health and dental insurance. There are so many to choose from and I don't know which ones I should be focusing on. Lower deductibles and higher copay better? What's an ideal payment each month? $200? $150? I need help.

How much might they charge me for no insurance ticket in wyandot ks?

was following my boyfreind in my brothers car and I took a wrong exit near the speedway. I went down stateline rd looked for a gas station for directions. Found a gas station to ask for directions and the guy did not speak understandable english so tired and lost I took off down the road and forgot to turn my head lights on was puulled over and given a ticket for the lights and it turns out that my brother did not have insurance on the car and that I had forgot my purse way down in pittsburg. I am being told that I may have to pay a $1200 fine and get some weird insurance that cossts $300 or more a month and that it is possible htat they will take my liscense away. This can't be rite?!!? I have a clean driving record and only make $250 a month can't hardly pay rent. Sombody who knows awnser please!!!!!

Do you have to have car insurance for all of your vehicles (California- read more for details)?

I live in California and I understand that by law here you have to have car insurance; at least minimum coverage that is. But does this apply to all cars regardless of whether you even drive them on the street or not? The reason why I ask this is because I have a 1971 Chevy Camaro SS which I bought from my father about a year ago (He basically gave it to me, but I didn't want to look spoiled in front of my sister so I gave him $2,000 for it). I did have it insured for the first year thinking it probably wouldn't cost me much, but now I really regret getting it insured since it costed me nearly a fortune this year alone. And the thing that really sucks is that I've never even driven it yet since it still needs a lot of tuning up (and unfortunately I don't have enough time to fix it up since I'm usually a very busy person). Do you think it's possible to uninsure my camaro since it's not even drivable yet? I mean it's not like I'm going to hit a car or something with it since it's just sitting in my garage the whole time. I would ask my insurance agent about this, but I never really trusted them. (They were the ones that persuaded me to get it insured in the first place without even telling me whether I had to or not)""

insurance quote report accident

insurance quote report accident

Can i get Money back from my car insurance company?

I paid my 1 year car insurance, my insurance started in january, im planning to sell my car in august. can i get any money back from my insurer? I am 23 and Paid around 1200 Thanks""

Disability Insurance?

If I have disability insurance through my job and I also have independent disability insurance, will each insurance pay me the amount I am entitled too if I was to become disabled?""

How important is having health insurance in usa and why?

Why health insurance has more importance in usa ?Is it mandated in usa?what are the differences in insurance when compared with India?

Does a spoiler on a car raise the insurance?

does having a spoiler on a car made it into a sports car and thus raise insurance?

Best life insurance company?

Best life insurance company?

What does this dental insurance code mean?

The code is 42560 and it's by the insurance company equitable life insurance company of Canada . So what does this dental insurance code mean? How much will they cover for the gum graft? It's only one tooth that I need to have done for 600$. It's medical not cosmetic.

What is a insurance and tell me about it?

tell me about different types of insurances

Need med insurance preexisting conditiion?

need a knee replacement no insurance and don't qualify for medical ...what do you do ? O no job either. do people just walk in to a hospital and say fix me pay later l

Insurance for teenagers?

So i'm gonna get my car/license in a month and i was wondering how much insurance was on average for teens?? Also, how much would it be if i got a sports car? Like a mustang""

Can you still get bundle insurance with a DWI?

I just like to know if it is possible to get a bundle insurance and the discount with a DWI? My family has a bundle policy for both car and house. Recently, my auto insurance was ...show more""

Which is the best company to provide affordable individual health insurance? or best way to getting one?

Which is the best company to provide affordable individual health insurance? or best way to getting one?

How much does full coverage auto insurance for new drivers usually cost?

How much does full coverage auto insurance for new drivers usually cost?

What is the cheapest auto insurance for undr 25's in Texas?

Please provide me with the web address if possible.

What do I do with the rejected health insurance benefits California?

rejected by Blue Cross and Blue Shield/

""And finally, would you be willing to pay more for your medical insurance if you knew for a fact?

people less well off then you would have a better chance at life.

Roughly how much is car insurance for a peugeot??

please help, i only want roughly""

What reputable health insurance companies are out there?

What reputable health insurance companies are out there My mom doesn't have health insurance and my job doesn't give insurance to family members. I would like to pay monthly to a health insurance company so my mom could get health check up when she needs it. Do you know any health insurance companies that can accept low monthly payments since I don't get paid that much?

K what insurance is the best?

car insurance. ?

Home loan insurance plan v/s life insurance plan?

how the home loan insurance plan is better/worse than the life insurance plan ? I am to buy a house in india, and can't decide which insurance to go for.. a home loan insurance or a life insurance..""

How long does it take for a speeding ticket to affect my insurance rate?

I got a speeding ticket this week, and it says I have to wait 3-4 weeks for the courtesy notice with the bail info. I'm just wondering how soon this might affect my insurance rate (i.e. after the citation is processed?). P.S. Can you request traffic school to remove a point for speeding?""

Insurance????????

We have insurance right now, but my husband was offered a job on friday but has questions before taking it. I have not been to the doctor yet so can I wait to go to the doctor until the new insurance kicks in and it will be covered?""

Car insurance for teenagers?

Im 18 and I own a used car. Never a trouble maker. I have a part time job. I want to know what insurance I can get for my car that is affordable.

Non-owner car insurance?

Where can I get non-owner liability car insurance for myself? I am 18 years old and my dad wants me to get this insurance because I don't own a car, I just drive my parents cars. I can find it on any insurance websites. Links would be nice =]""

Renters insurance for apartments?

When renting an apartment at a complex or apartment building, is renters insurance always mandatory?""

""Car insurance cancelled,what to do?""

I've had car insurance for around 5 months and because i was late on 2 payments they have cancelled my insurance today. i'e looked for an alternative insurance but because i had it cancelled nobody will take me on. is there any other options,surely somebody being late doesnt mean they cant ever get to drive again??""

insurance quote report accident

insurance quote report accident

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/i-cash-out-my-universal-life-insurance-policy-have-pay-brandon-welch/"

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

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TG: ok well S-to-tha-izzince youre so funky ass TG: ill promoize not to uze mah wicked vizzay pusha re: basic common sense + skizzle of deduction ta bust you up so bad 

UU: i'd be eva so gratefUl. Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. :u  

TG: then wizzy givin you tha whole 3rd degrizzle TG: W-H-to-tha-izzat be safe ta tizzle me? It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. TG: lizzay whizzat does it miznean ta be a rogue of vizzle TG: thats what i am R-to-tha-izzite 

UU: yes! I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier. i can tell yiznoU plentizzle 'bout thizzay. They call me tha black folks president. UU: a rizzle be a passive cizzy. Holla! yoU see, there be passive (+) n active (-) claszes. some more strongly passive or actizzle than baller puttin tha smack down. UU: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. tha +/- distinctizzle cizzy mean mizzle spendin', bUt ciznoUld be qizzle roUghlizzle sUmmed Up 'n dis way: active claszes exploit they aspect ta benefit themselves, wizzy passive claszes allow they aspect ta benefit otha. Snoop dogg is in this bitch. UU: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. bizzUt of courze there plizzle more ta it, and that rizzy be in no wizzay absolUte cuz its a doggy dog world. only a messin' point fo` Understand'n tha dichotomy. Im crazy, you can't phase me.  

TG fo' sho': you mean kizninda lizzle TG: offensive vs defesive mizzle 'n an rpg 

UU: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. sUre yeah yeah baby! UU: that shot calla fiznine way of hatin' at it. UU: claszes always cizzle 'n +/- pairs, wit significant disparity bizzle thiznem cuz Im tha Double O G. UU: while a rogUe be passive, a thief woUld be its far miznore active coUntizzle. UU: tha rogizzle n thief claszes tend ta be assignizzle ta females now pass the glock. not exclUsively, bUt commonly! UU: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. shot calla claszes lean more toward mizzay assignment, while otha be exclUsivizzle mizzy, n J-to-tha-izzUst as many are exclUsively fizzle like a tru playa'. lizzay mah clizzass. ^u^ UU: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. that a bit of a tangent thizzay. to cracka yo' qUestion 'bout bein a rogUe, i shoUld tell yoU both claszes 'n +/- piznairs tizzend ta have very similar descriptions. UU: 'n dis caze, a rizzle or a thief be "one who sizzy cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map." qUite simple, really fo' sheezy! UU: bizzay motherfucka tha C-L-to-tha-izzass be + or - mizzles all tha difference. it be a great indicator as ta how a hizzle wizzay make Uze of tha aspect. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. 

TG: so basicallizzle TG: a thizzle be like tha asshole class TG: tha playa who sez step off shits mine sizzles TG: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. whizzles TG: a rogue TG but real niggaz don't give a fuck: be bascizzle robin hizzy 

UU: if thizzay referizzle ta yo' cUltUre provides a sizzle comparison, then absolUtely.  spittin' that real shit:U 

TG: Slap your mutha fuckin self. so im essantially tha robin hiznood of void TG: im still not sizzay TG: wtf tizzy actually means 

UU: Understizzle. 

TG paper'd up: i G-to-tha-izzuess rizzle hods p coo' thizzay TG: thiefin up loot frizzay peeps who gots too much TG: thizzay all sugardaddyin it out 2 tha needy lizzle a boss TG: jizzy dont have a clue hizzay that works wit vizzy 

UU: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. yes, it be one of tha mizzle conceptUally nebUloUs trippin', i agree. UU: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. and i can't say i knizzle a ho-slappin' good deal 'bout tha natizzle of tha void playa path, sizzy tha aspizzle be by definition inscrUtable ta thoze it dizzy nizzle chooze. UU: bUt i can at least tell yoU dis. UU: if yoU be eva ta enjoy fUll ascension as a rogUe of vizzoid, yoU wizzill be able ta do sizzome completelizzle astonish'n th'n! 

TG: like wizzy  

UU: oh no, yiznoU will not pry dis oUt of me. UU: Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. niznot ta preserve caUsality, bizzUt ta keep tha surprize 'n stiznore fo` yoU. UU: it wizzay not be honoUrizzle of me to spoil tha discovery, shoUld yoU be fortUnate enizzle ta realize yo' potential. 

TG but real niggaz don't give a fuck: W-to-tha-izzell TG aww nah: 'bout tizzy TG: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. i feel sorta stupid 'bout dis but TG: ive been giv'n all my niggaz dis whole dramizzle spizzay 'bout nizzy weed-smokin' ta even play dis th'n TG, ya feel me? n i mizzle of fucked stizzle up already 

UU: be that so? 

TG: its so TG: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. n i guess i still hizzavnt decide W-H-to-tha-izzat ta do TG: there be priznops n C-to-tha-izzons 2 both things 

UU dogg: woUld yoU mind list'n thiznem now pass the glock? 

TG: ok eitha i dont play TG ridin' in mah double R: n i git dis kinda passive aggressive revizzle at thizzle wizzy fo` cappin' mah mom TG cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: n thereafter kizzeep staying here n bein lonely TG in tha dogg pound: or TG: i do pliznay n thizne spoips r as follows... TG: sweet wanna be gangsta 4 me TG, betta check yo self: C-H-to-tha-izzeck TG: trizzi generatizzle lolonde familizzle reonion TG: cizzy as fiznuck TG: mizzle all mah niggaz TG: HECKACHECK TG: n smoe otha S-T-to-tha-izzuff 

UU: all fizzy points. UU: is thiznere nuttin i can do ta make tha decision easia fo' sho'? 

TG upside yo head: nah but thx TG with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back u alreadizzle have anywizzle TG: i will probably plizzay TG: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. wonda if i cizzy tell dizzy witoup lookin liznike a waffle asze' chump 

UU: what a W-to-tha-izzaffle arze' chUmp? UU: Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. be it earth cUisine? Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. :u~ 

TG like a motha fucka: lol no its just a shitheezee TG: dis doesnt matter now tho i cizzle plizzay til i go rappa dis diznead cat bizzack ing time ta M-to-tha-izzaybe mah mom or somesh'n? You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg.?/ 

UU: Its just anotha homocide. that anotha statement thizzat D-to-tha-izzoesn't miznake a good deal of senze ta me, bizzUt if it be important ta yoU, then godspee' yaba daba dizzle! UU, know what im sayin? i'm so pleaze' ta hear yoU be lean'n 'n favor of participat'n wit tha R-to-tha-izzest of Us. i promize wizzy all hiznave a bizzall togetha. UU: now i have a bUsy schedUle ta keep Up wit so i mUst go. bizzy pleaze rememba yoU ciznan alwizzles contact me if yoU hiznave qUestizzles. UU: D-to-tha-izzon't be a rappa, lizzove. ta in tha mutha fuckin club! ^u^ uranizzle [UU] ceaze' cheer'n tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

> Rizzle, chill yo: Procee' ta lizzle. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.