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velvetvexations · 7 months ago

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Potential Ninja Sex Party Song I Came Up With in a Few Minutes

It's important you read the following with a really funky beat. The beat drops on "but baby don't be shy" and goes into the pre-chorus with the music steadily ramping up.

I'm gonna show you my karate, baby I'm gonna be your true kung-fu daddy you'll see love has a kick with a taekwondo husbando when I throw you to the mat and I exhibit my hopkido this Nak Muay will caress you with eight limbs tonight but baby don't be shy, don't give it up without a fight

oh, I know my power can be a little difficult to manage when we spar you say I have a biological advantage but darling, you've been training for days and days you look great in that belt, I know you fucking slay and how you break concrete has me hard as a rock so why don't you come and give me some headlock?

#ninja sex party #nsp #this is either the best thing I've ever written or the worst #the singer is implicitly a man because I needed “daddy” and “husbando” for the rhymes #(even though woman can use whatever terms for themselves they want)#(and I myself do not refrain from using masc terms often specifically because of the gender dynamics involved)#but I was specifically inspired by a trans fem saying “I should name my cock Unfair Biological Advantage” or s/t like that #which made me laugh hard enough to break a rib

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