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babymetaldoll · 3 years ago

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DIWK - Chapter ten: "Set me free my honey bee"

Word count: 11,6K

Summary: Let's jump 19 months in time and see how painful it has turned for reader and Spencer to hide their feelings for each other. JJ leaves the team, and a new member joins the BAU.

Warnings: Angst and hurt. Fools being assholes. Cursing, of course. Mention of CM cases and spoilers on S06E11.

A/N: Please don't hate me. Just remember things usually look like the shit before they get worst, and then everything is better. I hope.

Masterlist

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(Y/N)'s point of view

Time is a weird thing. I remember when I was in school and time didn't pass fast enough. Semesters were eternal. It felt it had been years by the time summer vacation arrived. The complete opposite happened to me at the BAU. Suddenly, time passed too quickly. A whole year and a half went by in the blink of an eye.

I told Spencer about it, and he sent me a paper published by Professor Adrian Bejan that presented an argument based on the physics of neural signal processing. He hypothesizes that, over time, the rate at which we process visual information slows down, and this is what makes time 'speed up' as we grow older.

My answer was that I thought it happened 'cos as we grew older, we did things that actually gave us joy, which made us feel the time was passing faster than before. So we argued a whole Saturday afternoon about it and created our own theories for that event.

My theory was my personal favorite, 'cos it was the only one that could easily explain why so much time had passed in the BAU, and it felt like it had been just a few weeks.

It hadn't been easy, though. Those nineteen months had been filled with some of the worst situations we had been through as a team.

After I got shot, JJ finally admitted her relationship with Will and got pregnant. That was shocking, the first BAU baby: Henry.

Sadly, Henry was the only little good thing that happened that year. Because to sum it up, a bunch of awful shit happened to all of us: Hotch was in a car explosion that almost killed him. Spencer and Prentiss got trapped in an undercover mission into an underground cult to investigate child abuse, and Emily was beaten up pretty badly. Also, Spencer got infected with anthrax and nearly died. That was probably the most agonizing moment I had lived since the whole Tobias Hankel situation two years earlier.

Also, that year Prentiss had to investigate the case of the death of one of her best friends, and I was in a pretty nasty fight with an unsub that got me out of the field for three weeks. Not to mention, Spencer was shot in the leg.

Hotch was stabbed by the only unsub that has actually won against the BAU: Foyet. He attacked Aaron and got on the lose for months, but we all knew his next move as torture Hotch's family. That's why his ex-wife Haley and his little son Jack had to go into protective custody, and he couldn't see them for months while we tried to catch Foyet.

Things didn't go as planned. And without a doubt, the worst moment that year was the day Haley died. Foyet killed her, and Aaron lost it. He literally killed him with his bare hands the moment he got him. For a solid week, I was sure Aaron Hotchner wouldn't be the unit chief anymore. Strauss actually opened an investigation related to everything that happened that day. But in the end, somehow, she understood the "bloodbath" that had happened in that house was all in Foyet's hands.

However, there's no way to deny that the whole team had changed in many ways after that year. The concept of being a family was now more present than ever. After chasing Foyet for months, we were all onto him as if he was chasing our own family, because he was.

You don't work this kind of job with a team like mine and don't get attached to them. And this goes beyond how in love I was with Spencer. The (Y/N) who first stepped into the BAU, scared to show her true self, was long gone. And despite my deepest fears, letting them in and showing them who I really was had been one of the smartest decisions I have ever made.

Do you want to know which was my stupidest decision? Falling in love with Spencer Reid. It hadn't actually been my choice. I just didn't fight the feeling either. I don't think I could have even if I tried, though. Those nineteen months brought us so close, my mom thought we were living together, and the teasing from our friends was so common we weren't even affected by it.

For Christ Sakes, even Strauss thought we were dating! She forced us to attend a seminar on fraternization, concerned after she realized we always took our vacation together. We had a lot of fun trips, though. First, we visited his mom and had an amazing weekend in Las Vegas. Then we took a few days off after the anthrax incident and went to Hawaii. Picture Spencer Reid in an "all-inclusive," drinking all the coffee and eating all the pastries possible while reading a million books underneath an extra-large umbrella. We had fun that week, did some local touring, but most of all, sleeping in and relaxing. Spencer hates the beach but got those tickets anyway.

Did everybody think we were a couple? Yes

Did it help that we shared rooms, 'cos we were already used to it? No

Did it feel like a honeymoon without sex? Yes

Could I stop thinking about sex with Spencer? No.

And all that led us to the nightmare our relationship was going to become.

Penelope Garcia was drunk. She kept pouring shots and pushing them to us. Emily was wasted as well. But she kept acting like the classy lady she is. Not like JJ. My poor baby had mascara smeared under her eyes after crying for like an hour.

We found out she was leaving the team, and it was a hard blow on us. And by hard, I mean the worst thing that had ever happened to us. We had suffered without JJ when she was on maternity leave. And we struggled without her. Now knowing the Pentagon had taken her away from the BAU was torture.

We had a goodbye party for her at Rossi's, but this was our goodbye girl's night, and neither of us was holding anything back.

We had cried, we had sung sad songs. We drank all the champagne, wine, and vodka we could find. And now, holding our tequila shots, we knew it was time to call it a night.

- "I just love you girls so much,"- JJ whispered, crying- I don't wanna work without you.

- "Boo, come here!!"- I opened my arms and wrapped them around my friend, kissing the top of her hair a few times- "I love you too, and you are going to come back so soon you won't have time to miss us. You'll see. Papa Rossi and Dada Hotch are gonna fix everything."

I was drunk. Seriously drunk. But that wasn't the reason why I was so sweet with JJ. The truth is, I was broken-hearted. Like Penelope and Reid, I didn't manage change very well, and the fact that JJ was forced to leave made me feel frustrated and mad. But most of all, it made me think of every time I had been a little bitch with her during the years. And I regretted each one of them.

- "And we won't be far!"- Emily added and caressed JJ's arm, smiling kindly- "You will still be in town, and we will not leave you alone"- JJ chuckled and nodded.

- "I know, girls. Shit, I love you all so much!"

- "We love you too!"- Penelope sobbed and moved closer, wrapping the three of us in her arms.

- "Please, take care!"- JJ wiped off the tears from her eyes and looked at us- "Emily, don't do anything stupid! Don't rush in the field, and please don't take your fucking vest off!!"

- "I won't! I promise!"

- "You have to live to be Unit chief one day!"- JJ added, and Prentiss widened her eyes, shocked.

- "That's not really my gold."

- "But you'd be queen, baby!!"- Jareau added and turned to Penelope- "And you, please make sure Hotch eats. I kept a stack of granola bars on my desk to keep him fueled during the day. He usually forgets lunchtime and skips dinner, so..."

- "Don't worry, JJ,"- Penelope nodded, and we all felt our heartbreak a little thinking about all the things JJ did in her daily basics to take care of the team, and we didn't even know.

- "How are we going to survive without you?"- I mumbled, pouting. JJ chuckled and held my hand.

- "You are a rock, and you will do a fantastic job keeping this team together. Just, please, can you and Spencer start dating now?"

I wide opened my eyes and stared at JJ. The comment surprised me. I shouldn't, 'cos the whole "you and Spencer should start dating" joke was getting old. Only this time, JJ wasn't joking. She held both my hands and looked right into my eyes.

- "(Y/N), he loves you"- I was about to argue with her, but she covered my mouth with her Cheetos smelling hand.

- "Don't say a word! Spencer loves you so much you really must be blind not to see it. And I know you love him too. It's implied in all the little things you do for him every day. So don't take it for granted. Don't think this will last forever 'cos look at me! A week ago, I was happily working at the BAU, and now I'm drinking at my goodbye party! So don't waste any more time! You are in love with Spencer, and he loves you! It doesn't take a profiler to see it. So please! Act on it!"

There was a dramatic silence after. I didn't know how to break it. I could just joke around, but somehow, it didn't feel right. It had been too quiet for too long, and that made everything harder to deny. Finally, Emily put her hand on mine, just like JJ was still doing, and smiled at me.

- "There's nothing to be ashamed of, (Y/N). You are not the first person to fall for her best friend."

- "And the Junior G Man loves you so much,"- Penelope added, landing her hand on our hands too.

- "As his friend"- I corrected and sighed. I guess that was it. After three years, I could probably start facing my feelings in front of my friends.

- "No, (Y/N)"- Garcia tried to argue, but I shook my head and stood up, 'cos all that sudden attention and affection was bothering me.

- "PG, I was in Hawaii with the man, sharing a room, walking around in a bikini, and he didn't do anything."

- "That's because he is shy!"- Emily excused him right away.

- "My bikini leaves pretty much nothing to the imagination. Do you know what he said when he first saw me on it?"- I looked at my friend and poured us another round of tequila- "And I quote, "I don't think I brought enough books. This one is too interesting."

I air quoted with my fingers as we spoke, and the three of them looked at me, speechless. I made my point and drank my shot, feeling the alcohol burning down my throat. My friends opened their mouths but didn't produce a word. I sighed and looked at them.

- "But he hates the beach, and he took you there anyway,"- Emily pointed out

- "Did he give you his speech about how he hates sandy food?"- JJ asked me, and I chuckled, nodding.

- "And about pink skin, limited and unengaging topography, and of course, the real reason he hates the beach: drug-resistant bacteria spread by seagull feces."

- "And the man took you to the beach!"- Penelope argued.

- "But he didn't do anything! he didn't make his move, didn't even hold my hand!!"- I nearly shouted- "That's why, among a lot of reasons, is how I know Spencer is not interested in me! If only I'd tell you all the shit we've been through!"

- "Please!! Tell us!!"- Garcia begged and grabbed one of my legs- "I won't live another day 'cos I won't be able to deal with the mystery!"

- "No! 'cos you are gonna tell Morgan"- I slurred- "And he is going to embarrass and tease my honey bunny, and my honey bunny is gonna get all nervous and nervous around me, and we are never going to..."- I stopped talking and looked at my friends. I was sharing too much.

- "(Y/N)?"- Prentiss looked at me, but I just shook my head and looked down.

- "I think I better go home."

- "No, you can't drive like this,"- JJ argued immediately and held my hand- "I'm not gonna let you go intoxicated. Will is gonna come pick me up, and we'll drop you in your place."

I nodded at her and stayed still. My friends smiled at me, and slowly very slowly, I leaned on JJ's shoulder and rested my head on it.

- "I love you, boo,"- I whispered, and she giggled- "I don't think I'll stay sane without you there with us anymore."

- "Hotch is gonna manage to get her back,"- Penelope assured me, and I just nodded.

- "Meanwhile, we won't replace you, and if anyone tries to push someone new into the team, we are not gonna take them,"- I added, feeling JJ's hand holding mine.

- "Don't be mean with people just 'cos you miss me. If there's a new teammate, it won't be their fault I was pushed out of the BAU."

- "But, JJ,"- I tried to argue, but she shook her head right away.

- "No, (Y/N). You can't be mean to people just because."

Clearly, my friend hoped I could be the better person. The simple question was: did I want to be the better person? Right there, drunk and sad, the answer was no.

Spencer's point of view

I kept finding myself awake at four in the morning, walking around my apartment, not able to read or to write anything. For the last months, at least twice or three times each week, I would stay awake, no matter how tired I felt, and I would haunt my own apartment, listening to my vinyl records.

The sudden lack of sleep wasn't really something weird in me. I have always been nocturnal. Besides, the news of JJ's departure had hit us all pretty hard. I had already shared my share of tears and tried to manage the fury that caused me to know we were helpless to the government's decisions. There was nothing we could do, neither us, Hotch, or even Strauss. Not that she would if she could.

My family was in crisis, and all we could do was hope for the best and stay together.

It was scary losing JJ. It made me think of all the things that could go wrong every day on the field daily. It was bad that we could get hurt or even die on our work. But that they divided us that way made no sense. Like Rossi said: our loss was someone else's winning, and in the FBI, no one cared if we lost.

I poured myself a cup of herbal tea and inhaled the smell of it. It smelled like home. Like (Y/N). She had some of her favorite teas in my apartment. She had a bunch of all her things there, actually. When mom visited, she thought we were living together. She is still sure we are dating and that I don't wanna tell her. I don't longer argue with her about it. It's useless, and it somehow feels good to imagine in another world. It was actually true.

That year my feelings for my best friend had grown in a way that made it all more difficult to deal with. I didn't just love her. I was in love with her. She was in everything I did, in each and every one of my thoughts. I could hear her laughter in my head, like a record playing my favorite song over and over again.

When she was out there in the field, I couldn't stop running all the probabilities of her getting hurt, and most of the time, I would do my best to keep her safe, knowing it could somehow interfere with the case.

Hotch had called me to his office a few times, aware something was going with me. He could read it on my face, I guess. It was scary to know everybody could read my feelings for (Y/N) but her. And it was sad to think of the worst: that she knew how much I loved her, but she didn't feel the same, and she was just being my friend 'cos she was never going to be anything else but my friend.

I drank my tea and hummed the song that sounded in my house at four in the morning: Love is a losing game. Seemed pretty accurate for my mood. I remember the day I got that vinyl. We were out with (Y/N), Frank, and Lu, looking for a present for Mikey's birthday, and we ended up in a record store, getting a million vinyl records for ourselves.

- "Are you getting all those?"- (Y/N) asked me and looked at the seven albums in my hand.

- "Yes, why? I can't?"- I answered and raised an eyebrow.

- "Sassy!"- she giggled and grabbed them- "You can get all the albums you want. But I have to give my approval first. No, you are not getting this!"- she grabbed The Beatles' Revolver and left it aside.

- "What? Why? It's only one I need to complete my collection."

- "I know, but when you get it, you'll force me to listen to it, and I don't like the Beatles,"- she argued, and I just shook my head, taking the album again.

- "Sorry, chipmunk, I'm buying it."

- "Fine. I won't go to your house for the next couple of weeks then."

- "Why don't you tell me which album you wanna listen to when you are in my house then?"- I looked at her, smiling at me and looking for a record on the shelves.

- "This! You need some Amy in your life."

And I did. Now, at four in the morning, all alone walking around, I could see her in my apartment, singing along to her favorite songs while cooking dinner, feeling at home. I wished she was there, with me, doing nothing. Watching tv, or reading. Just hanging out. I knew it wasn't healthy being in love with my friend, seeing her every day, and also hanging out with her every chance I got. But even when I knew she was never going to love me the way I did, I was going to take every chance I had to enjoy her company. If that was all I was going to get.

My phone took me from my thoughts, and I quickly walked to my room to get it. I thought it was Hotch announcing a case, but it was JJ.

- "Hey! JJ, everything ok? Is Henry ok?"

- "Yes, hi Spence. We are all ok."

- "It's four in the morning."

- "Sorry I woke you up... I just..." - she made a pause and sighed at the other side of the line- "Spencer, you know I love you."

- "I love you too. You are one of my best friends. Is everything ok?"

- "Yes, I just wanted to... remember a bunch of years ago, when you asked me to that football game?"

A million years had passed since the one and only time I had asked JJ out. It was the only move I tried to do on her, and I failed incredibly. It was awkward, and she had no idea it was a date, so she invited Garcia to come along. I was so embarrassed I never even mentioned that single event ever again, and our friendship grew after.

- "Yes, I remember, JJ. Why?"

- "When you asked me out, did you have a crush on me?"

- "JJ, are you drunk?"- I had to ask 'cos that conversation was starting to scare me.

- "Yes, but that's not why I'm talking about this. Just answer the questions, Spence. When you asked me out on that date, did you have a crush on me?"

- "Yes, I did."

I closed my eyes, embarrassed to face feelings that were far forgotten.

- "You see, I had a crush on you too back then,"- JJ said and chuckled- "But neither of us acted on it, and life continued, and now I'm in love with Will, and we have a baby, and you are his godfather."

Of all the things I thought I would listen to that day, never in a million years, I imagined I would hear JJ drunk telling me she had a crush on me when we first met.

- "Now, do you want that to happen again?"- she asked, and I didn't get it, 'cos I was still trying to process what I had just heard. So I might have had a relationship with her if only I had said something, act on it. Kiss her, ask her out again?

- "What?"

- "Spence. Do you want to miss the chance to be with the girl you like?"

- "No, but JJ, what are you talking about?"

She sighed, frustrated, and used that tone of voice with me, that very maternal specific tone of voice she used to explain things she knew were hard for me to follow.

- "When you like someone, Spence, you have to tell her. 'Cos sometimes, life gets in the way, and if you don't do what you have to do to be happy, no one will do it for you."

- "Are you ok, JJ?"

- "Yes, Spence, I'm ok. I'm home with Will. We just got here after dropping (Y/N) off her place."

- "How was she?"

- "She might have had a few too many drinks, but she'll be ok in the morning. Maybe she'd appreciate it if you brought her coffee and donuts."

- "She doesn't like donuts,"- I corrected her- "She likes cupcakes and brownies."

- "Sorry. Coffee and cupcakes... just tell her you love her, Spence. She deserves to know."

I held my breath and closed my eyes. I didn't get why JJ was telling me that, but I knew I didn't want to talk about it. So I said good night and hung up.

What was the point of telling me we could have been a couple of years had passed already? Why didn't she say a thing before? Or even better, why didn't she ever say a word about it at all? So I missed the chance to be happy with her. Great. One more regret to add to my list.

I laid on my bed and tried to remember that date. I was so nervous that day, my hands shook inside my pockets as I walked to JJ's door. She looked beautiful that day, especially when she looked at me and announced she had invited Penelope to join us.

That was when I realized she would never see me as a proper date, just like a friend. And I learned to make my peace with that over the years. My crush for JJ lasted a few more months, but it vanished when I fell for (Y/N). What if she had never joined the team? Would I have been in love with JJ forever? Jeniffer always made me feel like her little brother, and I guess that's the mechanic that works for us. We were good friends ever since we met, and yes, I had a crush on her, but we work more like siblings than anything else.

What was the point in telling me I had missed a chance with her now? I just couldn't see it.

(Y/N)'s point of view

The next few weeks were us trying to survive without JJ. The team was making the best it could, but it was hard. Penelope took the lead during the second case without JJ. She turned into our tech analyst and communication liaison, only to collapse under the pressure of having two roles.

No one was going to replace JJ. We all knew it. Literally, no one, 'cos Hotch decided he and Garcia were going to split the job, and we were all going to collaborate as much as we could, 'cos we were a team. A family. And that's what families do.

And families were the target of the unsub we were hunting the day everything changed. Again. I hadn't recovered from the departure of JJ when Rossi and Hotch walked to the bullpen and introduced us to Agent Trainee Ashley Seaver.

My nemesis.

- "Agent trainee Seaver"- Rossi smiled at her like a proud father and looked at us as we stood up, wondering who she was- "Supervisory Special Agent Prentiss, (Y/L/N), and Morgan."

- "I've heard so much about the three of you,"- she said with the sweetest tone of voice I had ever heard. Something about that felt odd.

- "I hope it is all good- Morgan flirted right away, of course."

- "Very, sir."

- "Anything specific? I mean about me in particular?"- I turned to him and failed in holding back my chuckles.

- "Please, don't encourage him, or he will never stop talking,"- I said, and Derek elbowed me playfully. Seaver smiled at us and even blushed a little bit. She was nervous.

- "Agent Seaver is on loan to us from the academy while she is remedial training with an injury."

Hotch announced. And my stomach tightened right away. There was something wrong with that whole scene. I could feel it in my guts. But I didn't know why?

- "Concussion. Hand to hand got a little out of control."- Seaver explained and kept a silly smile on her face.

- "How's the other guy?"- Prentiss asked.

- "Don't ask."

- "I was remediated in the academy also,"- Spencer said, walking over us, and suddenly I understood why I had a bad feeling about everything.

- "Agent Seaver, Dr. Reid."

As soon as I heard Rossi say those words, there was a part of me who just wanted to hold Spencer's hand and push him away from her, even before they could say hi. She looked at him like he was eye candy, and I clenched my knuckles as I stared at the scene.

- "Uhm... What was your issue?"- she asked him, and I could see the pink on her cheek intensifying as he looked at her, confused.

- "What was my issue? Marksmanship, physical training, obstacle course, Hogan's alley. You know, pretty much everything that wasn't technically book related. They ultimately had to make exceptions to allow me into the field."

Seaver stared at him and kept nodding, though I wondered if she was listening to what he had said. Spencer looked exceedingly handsome that day. His hair was very short for the first time in years, and he still had no idea how to comb it, so it was all over the place, making him look as hot as fuck.

I was so in love with him, I didn't know what to do with those feelings at all. It was hard working with Reid at that point. I just wanted to kiss him.

- "Agent Seaver's going to accompany us to New Mexico,"- Aaron announced, and I couldn't help but question him right away.

- "She is?"

- "As a consultant."- he assured me.

- "On?"- Morgan raised an eyebrow and looked at Hotch, wondering what a trainee agent could help us with as a consultant.

- "She has a unique perspective,"- Rossi tried to explain, but it sounded like bullshit.

- "They don't know?"- Seaver turned to the elderly agents, and they shook their heads.

- "Well, we weren't sure how you wanted to,"- David whispered.

- "Uh... Seaver's not my original last name. It's my mother's maiden name. Mine used to be Beauchamp. My father is Charles Beauchamp"- Ashley was supposed to explain the circumstances of her consultancy to the whole team, but she just looked at Spencer as she spoke.

- "As in the Redmond ripper, Charles Beauchamp?"- he asked her, and suddenly, it clicked. It was like my whole body was telling me I couldn't be close to her for a reason.

- "That's him,"- she whispered and kept her eyes on my best friend as he continued talking.

- "He killed 25 women over 10 years in rural North Dakota. I think that you caught him, right, Rossi?"- and David nodded.

- "Hotch was on that team, too."

- "Based on her life experience, we were hoping that agent Seaver might recognize something in the family dynamics inside the community that could be helpful. We have a plane waiting,"- Hotch announced and looked at us, but none of us said a word.

I kept my eyes glued at my feet the whole time Aaron talked. Then, Spencer nodded and walked with Seaver and Rossi out to the hangar. I couldn't even blink. I think I was in shock.

- "Her father was a serial killer?"- Prentiss asked Hotch, not getting what he was thinking.

- "That's definitely a different set of parameters,"- Morgan added. Neither of them was sold on the idea, which made me feel a little bit better.

- "I don't want her presence to get us sidetracked. It's a long shot that she's gonna see anything helpful. We work it like any other case,"- Hotch was clear, and Prentiss and Morgan nodded.

- "You got it."

But I disagreed with that.

- "(Y/N), is everything ok?"- Aaron asked me, and I tried my best to lie and be cool.

- "Yeah, I'm ok."

- "Ok. We work this like any other case. Wheels up in twenty."

But everything was far from being ok.

I sat next to Spencer on the jet, and we reviewed the case files together. Hotch briefed us, and we all pretended it wasn't weird having Seaver there. And I guess we had to pretend it wasn't odd knowing her dad was a serial killer.

- "You are very young, (Y/N),"- she said and smiled at me. She was sitting across from Spencer and me, and you could tell she had been trying to join the conversation for a few minutes now.

-" Twenty eight,"- I answered and looked at the files again.

- "And you, doctor?"

- "You can call me Reid. I'm twenty eight too,"- Spencer cut her a short, awkward, and nervous smile, and I turned to him.

- "Honey, did I leave my Mets jersey at your house?"- it was the only question that came to my mind at that minute. It was completely random, but somehow it showed a part of our dynamic that Ashley didn't know. Our friendship. Our closeness.

- "Yes, I found it last night,"- he answered and sipped his coffee- "I was gonna bring it over, but then I remembered you always borrow all my sweaters when you are home or when you stay over, so I thought maybe it was a good idea to keep it at my place."

- "I don't know, Batsy. It's my favorite sweatshirt- I raised an eyebrow, and I'm pretty sure I even flirted a little bit."

- "So? You need to keep one there."

- "But I like wearing your clothes when we are at your place. It's extra large and extra comfy."

- "Is that why you keep taking my sweaters back to your house?"- he asked and chuckled- "Last Sunday, I found four of my sweaters in your closet."

- "Sorry, I'm not even sorry,"- I said and laughed- "And what were you doing in my closet?"

- "Lucy, Ricky, can we focus on the case?"- Morgan asked and waved at us with one silly grin on his face- "We love hearing your adorable daily adventures, but we've got a psycho killer to catch."

Spencer blushed and flustered right away. I stuck out my tongue at Morgan and just shook my head. The way Seaver looked at Reid was still driving me nuts, but I felt I had shown her he was mine, childishly.

It's embarrassing to think that's not the most childish thing I did around her those days. Or in the weeks to follow. But I didn't like Ashley, and I didn't want her around my team. And it wasn't just her constant flirting with Spencer. It was the fact her father had killed my mother's sister when she was in college, and I was making my best effort to keep that fact aside from work. My personal life had to stay out of the FBI, especially when working a case.

I had to do some serious mental work trying to remember it wasn't Ashley's fault her father was a sick bastard. She hadn't hurt my family, and her father had ruined her life too. It wasn't her fault.

But one thing is knowing. Another thing is being rational about it. Spoiler: I wasn't so rational about it.

- "So, (Y/N). Do you like working at the BAU?"- Ashley asked me and looked at me through the rearview mirror. We were in the SUV, and Prentiss was driving. I was in the back seat, trying to ignore her, but she made it impossible.

- "Yes, very much,"- I answered and nodded, not taking my eyes from the window.

- "Everybody is very friendly,"- Seaver added and made a pause. I don't know if she wanted me to say something or if she was trying to find a way to say what she wanted to say.

- "Yes, they are,"- I humored her, and she quickly responded.

- "Are you and Spencer dating?"- I could feel the blood raising my cheeks as she spoke. And Prentiss flashed me a look through the mirror as Ashley continued talking.

- "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude. I just wondered because of the fraternization policy."

- "Right. Sure. Of course."

Those three words were meant to let Ashley know I wasn't buying her bullshit, So I literally spit them.

- "Spencer is my best friend. We are not dating."

Facing that simple truth had never been harder before, especially after how I saw Ashley's face light up.

- "You just seem to be so close."

- "Oh, they are close,"- Emily smiled at me and winked- "They are so close, they sometimes freak us out."

- "We freak you out?"- I raised an eyebrow and carefully hit her arm, pretending to be upset. But honestly, I was glad she was teasing me.

- "I am just saying, we are all pretty suspicious about you two. I am actually surprised you didn't share rooms tonight. They usually share rooms."- Emily explained to Seaver.

- "He was paired with Morgan,"- I pouted and looked at my phone. I thought maybe I could send him a funny text. I actually wanted to hang out with him.

- "He is very nice,"- Ashley added- "I mean, everybody is nice."

- "Yes, you mentioned it"

I was clearly not being nice. Seaver nodded and looked at the files again. I assumed she was trying to find a way to keep asking about Spencer, and I was making my best not to kill her.

- "Working with a genius must be somehow intimidating,"- she said after a few minutes. Damn it, she wasn't going to let that subject go.

- "It's fun working with Spencer,"- Prentiss said, trying to humor Seaver. And mostly, I guess trying to ease my mood and keep me from killing the trainee agent.

- "I'm sure it is,"- Seaver added. I hated her.

- "He is more than just a genius, he is a nerd."- Emily pointed out and chuckled at her words, making Seaver giggle too. I looked at my book again, but I knew I wasn't going to be able to concentrate on it at all. He was my nerd. Mine.

- "Well, it's very refreshing to be with a group who trusts and works so well together,"- she added- "I had never felt less judged and more welcome in my entire life."

I know I should have felt sorry for her. But I honestly couldn't. That was the day I realized I wasn't the good person I thought I was. There was a part of me that was a scumbag. I'm guessing knowing that is pretty helpful and positive 'cos you can work on your flaws. But I wasn't planning on working on anything at that minute, though. I just wanted to break Seaver's face.

Spencer's point of view

I didn't like working without JJ. I've never been good with change, and that was a massive alteration of our routine. I missed her, and adding Ashley to the team made things even weirder for me, even for a case. I didn't want to be judgemental, but her father was a serial killer. Of course, that would make things weird.

Besides, everybody kept bugging me, teasing me, trying to see if I liked Seaver. Penelope called while we were on the case and started taunting me, saying she knew I thought Ashley was cute. I could see she was beautiful, but I couldn't see her that way. And I didn't want anyone to say those kinds of things around (Y/N).

Why did I care so much?

I didn't want to face it 'cos I knew it was completely platonic, but I didn't want (Y/N) to think I had a crush on Seaver. I knew my best friend didn't have romantic feelings for me, and I also knew I wasn't going to make a move on her or anything. But I didn't want things to change more than they already had. And most of all, I didn't want anything to alter my dynamic with (Y/N).

But at the same time, somehow, it felt everything was already different between us.

- "Hey, honey bunny,"- (Y/N) walked to me and handed me a cup of coffee- "I thought you might need one of these."

- "You are a lifesaver,"- I whispered and sipped the cup. It was perfect.

We were on the jet on our way back home. The whole team was mostly quiet. The mood was weird. Ashley had done something quite reckless earlier and nearly got herself killed. She walked to the unsub's house all alone, not knowing he was our guy. She almost died, and none of us can even imagine what went through her head to do such a thing.

Rossi and Hotch walked to her. (Y/N) looked at me, and I could read on her face that both of us knew what was going to happen.

Ashley was alone when David sat in front of her, and Hotch stood in the middle of the aisle. Maybe that had been insensitive of us. Neither of us tried to contain her. Neither of us really knew her that well. Or at all, as a matter of fact.

- "You were not supposed to go off on your own."- Hotch went straight to the point.

- "I know,"- she whispered, and I could see how (Y/N)'s face changed. I tried to read her, but all I was able to see was... anger? I had to be wronged. She had no reason to be mad at Ashley.

- "You could have been killed,"- Hotch crossed his arms on his chest and stared at her.

- "I know that, too."

- "Why, Ashley? You're smarter than that"- Rossi sounded like a worried father. I didn't look at him 'cos I kept my eyes on (Y/N)'s, still trying to read her emotions. But what I saw made no sense. She really looked like she was angry at Ashley. Like she hated her.

- "I never got to apologize to any of the victims. The families of the women my father killed. I thought if I could just apologize to one family that had been hurt that way..."

And that was when (Y/N) snapped. She jumped from her seat and walked to Seaver. Aaron and David looked at her surprised, and Morgan turned to me, taking off his headphones. Neither he nor Prentiss got what was happening until that moment.

- "Ok. Shoot!"- (Y/N) sat right in front of Seaver, next to David, and looked at her. But she didn't get it.

- "What? What are you talking about?"

- "You just said you wanted to apologize to one of the families. So go ahead. Try."

The silence on the jet was so deep and awkward it felt no one was ever going to talk again.

- "I'm sorry, (Y/N). But I don't get what you are implying,"- Ashley's voice was a whisper. I knew she was sad and affected, embarrassed even. But I also knew (Y/N), and I could read it on her face. She wasn't joking.

- "You said you wanted to apologize to the family of one of your dad's victims, so go ahead. Apologize to me."

My first instinct was to stand up, which I did. But I froze and didn't take a step closer to (Y/N) when I noticed the severe and cold look in her eyes. I didn't know what she was talking about. But I knew she wasn't bluffing.

- "Why should I... apologize to you?"- Ashley asked her, and her voice broke at a certain point, probably scared of the answer.

- "Your dad killed my mother's older sister. She was in college,"- (Y/N) spit each word with hate and looked at Ashley, waiting for her reply. But Seaver didn't know what to do. She widened her eyes and stayed still. She barely kept her breathing steady.

- "(Y/N), maybe we should let Seaver rest,"- Hotch landed a hand on her shoulder, but my friend shook her head.

- "No, Hotch. By making that choice, she put everyone at risk,"- (Y/N) didn't take her eyes from Ashley as she spoke- "As far as I remember when you are at the academy, they teach you that in the field, we are responsible to and for your team."

- "(Y/N)... I had no idea..."- Ashley tried to apologize, I could see it, but it was clear she wasn't going to win that argument- "I am so sorry."

- "I don't know, Seaver. Did you think saying "sorry" would make those families feel better? 'Cos it ain't working here. "Sorry" won't make my mom stop feeling guilty about what happened. And, if things had gotten ugly back there, "sorry" wouldn't have made your mistake go away in case anyone would have gotten hurt. So no. Sorry doesn't help. Maybe it can ease your conscience, but when you really fuck it up, it never makes things better."

(Y/N) stood up and walked back to her seat in front of me. I let her pass and didn't say a word. I knew she wouldn't want to talk about it there. And, of course, Seaver didn't say a word. She just stood up and walked to the back of the jet, to the bathroom. Rossi and Hotch looked at each other and then looked at me.

David poured a glass of whiskey and walked to (Y/N) slowly. He didn't say a word, he just handed it to her, and she just took it and sipped it with shaky hands.

- "Thanks,"- she whispered, and Rossi nodded. Hotch raised an eyebrow, and for a moment, I thought he was going to say something, but he didn't. He just walked to his seat and opened a case file.

I moved back to my seat and opened my satchel. I had run out of candies earlier that day, so I didn't have much to give to her that could make her smile. So I picked a book and handed it to her. She took it and smiled at me kindly. I knew she was fighting back the tears, and I am sure she has held back all the emotions than being with the daughter of the man who killed her aunt since she knew who Seaver was. And she managed to do the job well. I was proud of her.

- "Wanna grab something to eat when we reach DC?"- I whispered, but for the first time ever, she shook her head.

- "I'm gonna have to catch a rain check for that dinner. I think I wanna go straight to my bed today, honey."- she sipped her glass again, and I nodded.

- "Don't worry, next time."

I was waiting for the train to go back home later that night when I saw Seaver sitting at a bench at the station, staring at her hands on her lap. I didn't see her leaving the BAU, though to be honest, I was really focused on finishing my paperwork to go home. (Y/N) had left as soon as we reached DC, but I had stayed a little longer.

I hesitated for a few seconds before I took a few steps closer and waved at Seaver. She looked at me surprised, as soon as she saw me, but didn't move. I smiled, trying to look friendly, and sat next to her.

- "Hi. What are you doing here?"- I asked her, and she shrugged.

- "I was going to go home, but I think I sat here half an hour ago and haven't been able to move,"- I turned to her and shook my head.

- "Do you want to eat something?"- after what had happened at the jet, I figured Ashley wasn't feeling so good, and maybe talking with someone could help her. She looked at me and blushed; I don't know why. But at least, she smiled and nodded.

- "Great, pizza?"

- "Pizza sounds good."

We were waiting for our food and making small talk. I kept giving Ashley pizza facts to fill the silence 'cos it was weird hanging out with Ashley. I didn't know her, really. We had worked a case together, but that didn't mean I knew her. And, of course, we had the whole jet incident. I felt a little guilty about what had happened, though it wasn't my fault at all in retrospect. I just felt like it was my job cheering her up a little bit after everything she had gone through.

- "How do you do it?"- she asked me all of a sudden- "How do you deal with the pressure of this job?"

- "You get used to it, I guess. I don't know if it's a good thing to get used to, but... it comes with the job, I think,"- I didn't know if I was doing ok comforting her. Then again, I have never been particularly good at it. Not then, not now.

- "Did you always dream about doing this?"- she asked me, and her eyes locked into mine in a way that made me feel slightly uncomfortable.

- "Y... yes. Ever since I was a kid, catching the bad guys,"- Seaver nodded and sipped her coke- "You? Why did you get into the academy?"

I regretted my question right after I asked, just 'cos I realized she might have done it to understand her father's behavior. It was only apparent that had shaped her actions.

- "I guess you know that..."- Ashley answered and smiled, her eyes looking straight into mine. I know I blushed. She is a beautiful woman, though I wasn't thinking about her that way. It was an odd feeling being observed that way.

I was glad our pizza made it to the table, and we were forced to stop talking, and I could focus on anything else but her. Not that I didn't want to look at her, but... I think the right way to explain it is to call it "uneasy." That's how I felt. I wanted to be friendly with her, she had a horrible experience consulting with the team, and I was sure she wasn't really having a good day.

- "This might sound weird, but... do you think I can call you sometime?"- Ashley asked after a few minutes. We were eating and talking about nothing important. I nearly chook at her words and looked at her, nodding.

- "Sure, why?"- I didn't mean to be rude. I just didn't know why she might need to talk to me again.

- "I just think maybe you could help me with a few assignments at the academy."

- "Yeah, of course."

Ashley Seaver smiled and nodded at me, pleased. She took a sip of Sprite, and I could read her, trying to find the words to continue speaking.

- "I'm glad. I was sure you were going to say no."

- "Why?"- I furrowed my brows, confused- "I'm not a big fan of phones, but I can handle a casual phone call."

- "No, I just didn't think your girlfriend would like... I mean, I think (Y/N) hates me, and as her boyfriend, I thought you... would... I don't know."

- "I'm, we are... we,"- I was completely flustered as I tried to rearrange my thoughts. Seaver looked at me innocently and waited for my words.

- "(Y/N) isn't my girlfriend"- it bothered me to admit that simple fact. Why? 'Cos it hurt to think we looked like a couple, but we weren't. Why did Seaver think we were together?

- "Really? But..."

- "She is my best friend,"- I explained poorly. She nodded and hesitated before saying what she was thinking. It was obvious she was trying to arrange the words in her head.

- "It's just that you two... sorry, I'm overstepping,"- Ashley blushed and shook her head- "She is... strong."

- "Yes, very."

- "I think I started with the wrong foot with her."

- "Well, I don't mean to justify anything, but if your father hurt,"- I made a pause, trying to find a way to say it that wasn't so painful.

- "Killed. My father killed her aunt,"- she corrected me with a cold and monotonous tone of voice. I just nodded and sipped my water.

- "She is an amazing person,"- I don't know if I was trying to excuse (Y/N)'s earlier behavior or if I just loved her so much I needed to tell people how awesome she was.

- "I'm sure you will pass this,"- I assured her- "Once you get to know her, and she gets to know you."

- "I don't think she will give me that chance. Besides, I was just clear to assist with only one case."

- "If you want to stay, you can request your remedial training be here. And if Hotch approves it, I could talk to (Y/N). I'm sure she will like to know you better."

Why did I say all that? I had no idea.

- "Thank you, Spence. You are really sweet,"- Ashley moved closer and held my hand. I stayed very still, absolutely awkward.

- "Yeah, I don't... like... holding hands,"- I quickly moved it away and tried to smile at her. She stayed still, not understanding my reaction but trying to act normal.

- "Sorry."

- "That's ok. I'm a germaphobe, that's all."

After pizza, we left the place and said goodnight. I told Ashley I was weary (which was, in fact, the truth) and got her a cab to take her home. After that, I walked to my place. I felt like I needed to be alone for a while. My head was overwhelmed, and in the latest couple of weeks, I had severe trouble sleeping.

I had migraines that nearly blinded me. I was scared they meant I could develop the first signs of schizophrenia, like mom, 'cos they were coming more and more often. It wasn't that bad yet, the light didn't hurt my eyes, and I didn't have any sign of hallucination, but still, I knew it could be serious.

I tried to think of a reason why I might be having those severe headaches. I was eating correctly, mostly 'cos (Y/N) forced me to eat. No, she didn't force me, but she made sure I had all my meals at work, not just coffee. And usually, at the weekends, we would spend our time together, and she was a fantastic cook. So it wasn't an alimentary issue.

I wasn't sleeping well. That wasn't new, but it was getting serious. I wrote and read a lot at night 'cos I couldn't fall asleep until late. I didn't know why. I just couldn't rest. My body ached, and my brain wouldn't sleep. The only nights I could actually get some rest were the ones when (Y/N) stayed with me. It was a blessing when Hotch paired us to share rooms, 'cos I could easily fall asleep when she was around. Her presence soothed me in a way that I didn't understand. Let me put it this way, I know it might sound cheesy, but the beating of her heart set the rhythm for my own, and at night it would bring me peace.

I reached home that night and sighed. I knew I wasn't going to rest easy. (Y/N) wasn't there with me. So I made myself a cup of herbal tea, (Y/N) had a lot of those in my house, and I drank them when I missed her. The smell coming from the cup made me feel like she was close.

How pathetic I had become! But I could only share those thoughts with myself. No one knew I had feelings for her, and I was going to deny it till the end, no matter what had JJ said. I couldn't take that phone call from my mind, and on those sleepless nights, I kept overthinking and overanalyzing everything.

I got into bed with a few books and my cup of herbal tea. I took a look at my cell phone, two new messages.

- "I miss u"

(Y/N) sent, and a warm feeling spread on my chest as I imagined her whispering those words as I read them

- "Breakfast tomorrow before work?"

- "See you at seven-thirty."

I typed and sent it.

What could ever happen if I told her how much in love I am with her? I would lose her, and I'd be alone. She didn't feel that way for me. It was a fact. I was just glad she was my best friend, and I could share everything with her. Was I pathetic? Yes, very, but in a way, it felt it was just all I deserved. Not more, not less. Just being in love with a girl who didn't love me back.

At least she wasn't dating Paul anymore. I hated that guy.

(Y/N)'s point of view

Spencer was waiting for me outside our usual coffee shop, already holding two cups of coffee. His short hair looked dreamy as she smiled and took off his sunglasses. It had to be illegal being that hot. But, seriously, how didn't he get laid? He was fucking dreamy. In the four years we had been best friends, I saw Spencer in many hairstyles, and each of them made him look like a model.

Falling in love with Spencer Reid had been a process I hadn't actually been fully aware of. But I was completely conscious I needed to hide those feelings from him and from everybody at the BAU.

Ok, fine, I had somehow faced part of those feelings in front of my drunk best buddies at Penelope's house, but I never actually confirmed anything. I had just... shared some of my frustrations, I guess.

- "Good morning, honey bunny,"- I smiled and sighed as I stood in front of Spencer, watching him grin back at me and hand me one of the coffee cups.

- "Good morning, chipmunk. Did you get some rest?"

- "Yes, I fell asleep as soon as I reached my bed. I was exhausted."

- "I'm glad you are fully rested."

- "What did you do yesterday?"

- "Nothing,"- he answered quickly and turned around- "I got you a carrot muffin to go."

- "Thank you so much. I'm starving. I didn't even have dinner yesterday."

- "Really?"

- "I told you, I reached home and crawled into my bed."

We walked outside the coffee shop in silence. Spencer bit his donuts, and I ate my muffin. It was nice and calming being with him doing domestic things in life.

I hated how much in love I was with him 'cos I knew I had to shake that feeling away. He was never going to have feelings for me. I was a regular human being, and Spencer Walter Reid was a genius. He deserved better, he was actually never to think about me that way, and I refused to ruin our friendship with those feelings.

- "So, Comic-con is coming. What are we doing this year?"- I asked as I drove us to Quantico.

- "I was thinking we should do something classic,"- he looked at me, nearly beaming on his seat- "We haven't done Star Wars yet."

- "Really?"- I frowned, confused- "All these years? Are you sure?"

- "(Y/N), eidetic memory,"- he argued, and I chuckled- "So, how do you feel about Leia?"

- "Do I have to be Leia 'cos I'm a girl?"- I asked him, and he flustered right away.

- "What? No, you can be whoever you want to be. I was just, it came to my mind... I didn't,"- I giggled and looked at him for a second.

- "I'm messing with you, Batsy. I always wanted to dress as Leia. Surprisingly, I never had. Padme once, it was a mess, but never Leia. Who are you planning to be?"

- "Maybe Luke... or Obi-Wan. Morgan suggested C3PO once."

- "If I'm Leia, you should be Han,"- I don't know why I said that out loud. I thought about it, I pictured it in my head, but I knew I shouldn't have said it. Then why did those words leave my mouth? I don't know.

- "Han Solo... yes... yeah, sure. Of course! We can pick our outfits this weekend."

- "Great! What do you think would look better? Slave Leia or classic all in white Leia?"- Spencer didn't answer. He just sipped his coffee and looked outside the window.

- "You would look good in both,"- his cellphone interrupted our conversations, and I thought it might be a case. But I was so wrong, it hurt.

- "Hello? Oh, hi, Ashley,"- I nearly hit the break as soon as I heard him saying her name, but instead, I turned around and looked at him.

- "Good, yes. On my way to work with (Y/N). Oh, that's good."

I didn't care what she was saying. I just needed to know why that bitch was calling him. I was blind in jealousy, and I was having a hard time hiding it.

- "Really? Emily? That's... that's great. Sure, we'll see you around, gotta go. Bye."

- "What the fuck?"- I swear, I didn't think what I was saying. Those words just slip through my lips straight from my guts. I hated Seaver.

- "That was Ashley."

- "Figured when you said "Hi Ashley." What? Are you best friends with her now?"

- "What? No! No way! She just wanted to say hi... and... She.... asked for my number 'cos she wanted to help her with some of the academy's projects,"- Spencer was so nervous he actually stuttered as he answered my simple question.

- "Of course, she did,"- my voice was bitter and hurt, but most of all, ironic. And I don't know if Spencer didn't want to understand me or actually didn't get the hint, but he just continued talking.

- "She wanted to tell me she requested her remedial training be at the BAU."

- "What?!"- that wasn't subtle. I actually yelled- "I'm gonna have to see her again?"

- "If Hotch approves..."

- "Fuck!! That's awful!!"- I hit the wheel, frustrated.

- "She's not a bad person, (Y/N). Her dad was a murderer, but that doesn't mean..."- I turned to look at Spencer for a second, and he just shut up- "Sorry."

- "I don't like her, Spencer."

- "Yes, I know."

- "Her dad killed my aunt!!"

- "I know..."

- "And on top of that, that bitch is..."

I had to bite my lips and focus on the road, actually holding my breath for a few seconds, just not to open my mouth and ruin it all.

The main reason why I hated Ashley Seaver wasn't just because of what her father had done. That itself was enough to keep her away. But on top of that, she was flirting with Spencer. She wasn't even subtle about it; she was nearly all over him. I saw her! She wanted him, and he had no idea! He was blind to her attention. Unless he liked it. Did he? Shit, I hoped not.

- "She what?"- Spencer whispered, scared of my reaction.

- "She plays the pity card the whole time. Bad things happen to all of us. You don't have to make it who you are, she does, and she expects sympathy."

I grabbed my muffin and took a big bite of it. Spencer sighed and stayed quiet for a moment, giving me space to decompress, I think.

- "Did you know the origins of carrot cake are disputed by many countries?"- I looked at Spencer, and he nodded- "Many food historians believe carrot cake originated from the English recipe of carrot puddings, eaten by Europeans in the Middle Ages when sugar and sweeteners were expensive, and many people used carrots as a substitute for sugar."

- "My mom would fight all those historians and convince them she invented it. Her carrot cake is the best."

- "And I would agree, the cake she baked for your last birthday was amazing."- I nodded and heard him chuckle as I kept my eyes on the road. I wanted to focus on the memories of my last birthday and how fun it was, but something was bugging me.

- "And why did she call you to tell you what she wanted to do?"- I parked the car outside the BAU and turned to Spencer. He opened his mouth, but no word came from it. So I asked him again.

- "Honey, why did Seaver call you to announce she would take the remedial training at the BAU?"

- "It... might... had been my idea,"- he whispered and held his satchel tight against his body. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't believe it.

- "Why on earth did you do that, Spencer?!"- I shouted as I got out of the car, grabbed my purse, my clean go bag in case we had a case, and started walking towards the building.

- "It wasn't like a suggestion. She just..."

- "I can't believe it!!"

- "It doesn't have to be that bad! It's just for a few weeks..."

- "Hopefully, Hotch won't accept."

- "(Y/N), come on,"- Spencer held my hand and stopped me- "This is not like you. Yeah, you don't like her, but you are making it a big deal, and it's not."

- "I'm starting to think you are crushed on her,"- I didn't want to say those words. They just slipped.

- "What!? Why? No!! I'm not!"- the high pitch on Spencer's voice was a clear sign of how uncomfortable he was with the conversation.

- "Then why are you defending her?"

- "I am not! I'm just saying maybe you are acting a little bit... irrational about this whole thing. She hasn't done anything bad."

- "Other than jeopardizing the whole case yesterday?"

- "Right, other than that..."

I felt Spencer's hand in mine, and I swear, I couldn't stop thinking about how it felt. It kept sending shivers all over my body. His thumb rubbed small circles on my skin, probably trying to calm me down, and it worked. I followed it with my eyes for a second as I took a few deep breaths and nodded.

- "Ok, I won't make a big deal if she stays."

- "Thank you."

- "Just... don't ask me to be her friend."

- "You don't have to be her friend."

Spencer stood in front of me and smiled. I swear all I could think of was kissing him. And a part of me felt it was getting harder and harder to resist. He put on his sunglasses and kept his hand in mine for a moment until Penelope's voice took us from our little bubble.

- "Good morning, my wonder babies!! Ready to fight crime?"

I actually didn't know what I was getting into.

Hotch had taken the day off. We were around the one-year anniversary of Haley's death, and according to what Rossi explained to us, Jack wasn't feeling so good. It was said it would be just a day or two, but I had the feeling it might be a couple of weeks. Hotch would always put himself second, but he would do whatever it took to keep him safe when it came to his son.

Morgan had been asked to take a trip to Petersburg Federal Correctional Complex to do a risk assessment on a case, so Spencer, Prentiss, and I were in the bullpen. Garcia was in her office, and Rossi was in a meeting with Strauss. I'd say it was a very calm morning, catching up with all the pending paperwork we had. Spencer had just gotten me a cup of coffee when I heard Seaver's cheerful voice.

- "Hi guys!"- she walked in with a big smile and waved- "How are you?"

Spencer looked at me as we all said our hellos. I could almost read "Please, be nice" written all over his face, and for a moment, I was willing to do as told. I didn't want him to suspect why I was so annoyed by her after all.

- "I talked to Hotch"- Emily smiled at Seaver and moved a chair for her- He signed off your remedial training, and I'll be your training agent. I'll supervise your work. I already told Rossi too, so it's official.

Ashley jumped from her chair and hugged Emily. I rolled my eyes and stared at the file on my desk. I really wasn't ready to deal with her. I wasn't prepared to deal with someone trying to steal Spencer from me.

Ok, Spencer wasn't mine to keep, but we had been inseparable for four years, and I didn't want to lose that. I didn't want to lose him.

I had never been ready to deal with Spencer dating other girls. The few times girls had hit on him had been awful. Once, Morgan took him to a club when we were on a case, 'cos the unsub was picking his victims there, and he taught him how to pick up girls. The bartender ended up giving him her number 'cos my dorky best friend was charming. Derek still remembered that moment from time to time, quoting it as "The day he turned Spencer into a man."

I loved Derek, but fuck, I hated him sometimes.

- "Welcome to the team,"- Spencer waved at Seaver from his desk and turned to me, raising an eyebrow.

- "Yeah, welcome,"- I added and cut her a short smile.

- "I'm thrilled to join you guys for a few weeks. I always dreamt of being here. I'm ready for making it up after the last case."

- "Don't be so hard on yourself,"- Prentiss interrupted her and smiled friendly- "You remained calm under pressure, and the case was solved. That's all that matters."

I had to control myself not to snort after Emily's words. Instead, I kept my eyes locked on my desk like I had done before. I was so focused on it that I could have actually developed telekinesis skills and moved the freaking file with my eyes.

- "I just wanted to say thank you to all of you,"- Seaver's voice was soft, in a mix of fear, excitement, and... something else I couldn't read.

- "Especially you, Spencer. I really enjoyed our talk last night, and I have the feeling I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. Thank you for the pizza. I owe you dinner."

- "Don't, it was nothing,"- Spencer flustered and stood up quickly, grabbing his pile of files and walking away, arguing he needed to ask Garcia something.

I did my best not to move a muscle. I didn't want Seaver to know how much I hated the fact she had shared what seemed to be a lovely evening with Spencer. One he didn't actually mention when we talked about what we had done the previous evening. Why did he decide to keep me in the dark? I couldn't understand that. Maybe he just didn't want me to know he actually had feelings for Seaver. Maybe he had asked her out, and because he knew I hated her (though he really didn't know why), he decided not to tell me what was going on.

I had been wasting all that time in love with Spencer. I knew I would never act on those feelings, and clearly, he didn't have feelings for me. So... maybe it was time to let him go.

How could I let Spencer Reid go when I never actually had him?

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Next update: June 16th, 2021

#spencer reid #Criminal minds #matthew gray gubler #diwk #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x you #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds re write

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crashdevlin · 3 years ago

Text

Marked

One Night at a Time Masterlist

Author’s Note: Part eight of One Night at a Time series.

Summary: Y/n has been living and hunting with the Winchesters since Dean returned from Purgatory. Their relationship has gone nowhere, but she can't leave. With the Mark of Cain changing him, she might have to go to extremes.

Pairing: Dean x Reader, OMC x reader (kinda)

Word count: 3992

Story Warnings: threats of harm to reader, poor self-esteem, angst, MoC!Dean being dark and terrible, Jealous!Dean

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I told him not to trust Crowley. I told Dean not to listen to that asshole demon when he showed up. I told him we could find another way to take down Abaddon. I told him not to go to Cain.

Did he listen?

No, of course not. I'm just his not-a-girlfriend. I'm not worth listening to. Even Crowley says Castiel is closer to being Dean's girl than I am.

I followed him through those damn Trials and supported him through Sam's sickness. I followed him through the debacle of that murderous Angel trying to steal Sam and Kevin's death.

And he left me behind to go get that Mark from Cain. The Mark of Cain that's systematically changing him. He's darker, angrier, fucking rougher around the edges than I've ever seen him. I hate how he's become so cold.

Not that he was the warmest guy before Cain marked his arm. I've been with him since he returned from Purgatory and we don't even share a room in the Bunker! God, and why would we, right? He needs his space. He always needs his space but Heaven forbid I try to get some of my own. He shames me and guilts me when I take a job on my own. He makes me feel...powerless.

He doesn't want me to leave. He's told me a million times. But that's about as far as he goes. He doesn't want me to leave...but he's allowed to leave me. How is that fair?! And now he's got the Mark. Now, he's snapping at me and being an asshole over little things that he used to let go…and I am stuck here in this bunker with my not-boyfriend who has the Mark of Cain on his arm and his brother who wants to act like they aren't brothers anymore. I need a break. I need to breathe.

"I need a vacation," I say out loud as I look at my laptop screen. Vegas seems nice. Key West is also an option.

Dean snorts. "Yeah, right."

I glare at him. "Why not?"

"Because we got more important things to do, like finding Abaddon," Dean snaps, eyes narrowing at me.

"Yeah, well…" I stand and slam my laptop closed. "How you doin' on that one? You and Crowley found her, yet?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I'm going to bed." It's useless to argue about Crowley. It's useless to argue about the Mark or the First Blade or fucking Abaddon. I'm not here to have opinions.

"Meant something," he says, standing as I pass him heading for the hall. He's instantly aggressive but, sadly, I'm used to it by now. I look up into his eyes. Nothing warm there. I'm used to that, too.

"I'm not doing this, Dean. Have a nice night. I'm going to bed," I repeat.

"You're not going any-fucking-where until you explain where this fucking attitude is coming from," he growls at me, grabbing my arm. Another thing I'm used to, he's started grabbing me, shaking me in frustration like a goddamn ragdoll. He hasn't hit me...yet. I think it’s probably just a matter of time, though.

"Let go of me." I say the words with conviction. Wavering isn't an option here. I can't show fear...isn't it insane that I'm thinking this about the man I sometimes share a bed with?

"Why are you being such a bitch?" he asks and I reach over to pry his fingers off of me. That's gonna bruise, but whatever.

"Because...I need a vacation." I step away from him. "Don't stay up all night."

I'm fucking sick of this. I'm sick of this bunker and I'm sick of this situation and I'm sick of this game. I'm sick of being treated like a hood ornament. I'm nothing to him. He doesn't want labels; he's said he doesn't even want exclusivity. He doesn't value my opinions. He doesn't value my skill as a hunter. He hasn't even praised me in bed for months! He doesn't talk anymore. He just takes what he wants and then he leaves. I'm just...so fucking tired.

"You okay?" Sam asks as we pass in the hallway.

Should I lie? Will he even care? He doesn't care about Dean right now so why would he care about what he's making me feel?

I smile and shake my head. "Just stressing over the Mark. I'm fine!"

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine," I repeat. "Don't worry about me."

Sam looks like he's going to argue for a moment, but he just nods and heads toward the kitchen. Good. I close the door and secure the lock. I pull out my phone as I move to sit on the bed.

"What has he done now?" Matilda asks as she answers my phone call.

"Am I that predictable or are you that good?" I ask.

"I'm a psychic, sweetie, and you only ever call me when you're having trouble with your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend." I run my hand down my face and lie back across my mattress. "He's losing his mind. The Mark is-"

"A problem but not the problem," she interrupts me. "The problem is that he refuses to acknowledge his actual emotions for you." I roll my eyes at the thought that he has any emotions for me. "Don't roll your eyes. I've told you before, he has feelings for you."

"He never fucking shows it and it's gotten worse since he got the Mark!"

"And it'll get worse than that if you leave again." Of course she knows I'm thinking of leaving. Why do I talk to a psychic? "Because you need someone to tell you what you're ignoring from your own psyche."

"What I'm ignoring? What about what he's ignoring? He doesn't even show me basic human kindness anymore!"

"You really think that leaving him alone...with Sam pretending like he doesn't care about what happens to him...is going to help anything?"

"Think it'll help me."

"He would just chase you down. You know that he would. And if he did, that Mark of darkness would take the anger he would be feeling and distort it. Your fear, the thing making you want to run, it's gonna come true. You want that?"

"Of course I don't want that!" I hiss at her. "But what should I even do? He's not-"

"Give him what he wants." What the hell does that mean? "He says he doesn't want to be exclusive. He wants you to be free to take other lovers, so do it."

"People don't like me, Matilda."

"I can't imagine why, when you refuse to listen to people. There are people who like you and Dean Winchester is one of those people! He just needs to see that he doesn't actually want the space he thinks he wants."

"Wait, is this a plot to get him to agree to a label? That's not what I called you for!" I just want to know if he'll get better.

"You think maybe he'd be a bit nicer, more controlled maybe, if he has a bit of love in his life?"

"He's already got love in his life!" I growl into the phone.

"Listen to me. I have consulted the cards and this is the only way. You have to make him see that he doesn't really want you free to play the field." Is she serious? This isn't a rom-com! "Don't roll your eyes." She always knows! "He needs to know what he feels and after all these years, it's time for you to woman up and make him see it."

"And how should I do that?"

"Make the man jealous."

"This is my life, not some romantic comedy! That won't-"

"I know the hearts of men. This will work. You make him jealous and I swear to you, he will finally see what he's been denying since the Roadhouse." This isn't going to work. "Yes, it will. I promise. The cards say-"

"Yeah, yeah. The cards. I'll...think about it. Thanks for the advice, Mattie."

"Yeah. Send me a check for the reading," she jokes. "Let me know how it goes. Bye."

I hang up and toss my phone to the side. It's weird that she's my friend. She is my only friend, really. God, how pathetic am I that the only friend I have is a psychic that found me by chance in an organic cafe?

My phone goes off with a text and I pick it up.

It wasn’t by chance, it was by fate. And you arent pathetic.

Thanks, Mattie. I set the phone on the side table and curl up on my side. Make him jealous. How the fuck am I supposed to do that?

I think back to every romance movie Dean and I fell asleep watching in motel rooms because there was "nothing else on". By the time I wake the next day, I've figured it out. I spend half of the day in my room, preparing. By the time I leave, I don’t even look like myself. It’s a rare circumstance for me to wear makeup and I never wear dresses. Even my FBI outfit is a pantsuit.

But here I am, stepping out of my bedroom with a faceful of dramatic makeup that took hours of youtubing to figure out and perfect, wearing the only dress I own: this little black thing I had to wear to a victim’s wake a few months ago.

“Wow! Look at you!” Sam calls down the hall as I head for the garage. He catches up to me quick as my heart starts pounding. I am so uncomfortable right now, but I hope Sam can’t tell. “What’s the occasion?” he asks as he looks me up and down, from my perfect hair to my cute black pumps.

“No occasion. Dean said we’re too busy for me to have a vacation, but I need to blow off some steam. I’m gonna hit that karaoke bar in Smith Center; sing a few songs, drink a few beers.”

“Oh?” Sam’s eyebrow raises. “Is that all? That getup is for songs and beers?”

I swallow and smile tightly. “Sure.”

His eyes soften. “I know he’s been kinda cold lately but-”

I shake my head. “It doesn’t matter, Sam. I’m doing this because I need it.” I turn and walk down the hall, heels clicking on the floor. “Don’t wait up.”

This is stupid. Why am I doing this?

Because Mattie said to. This better fuckin’ work.

I sit at the bar and order a beer. I’m halfway through it, looking through the big binder of songs for karaoke, when a man sits next to me. He tries to be discrete about checking me out, but I notice it. Of course he’s checking me out. I look like the kind of women Dean picks up in bars; flashy and, ultimately, easy.

“Nice to see a woman who enjoys a good beer,” he says after he orders a Bud Light.

I fight not to roll my eyes. My Blue Moon is barely beer but it’s more beer than Bud Light. “I usually drink whiskey,” I say with a smile.

His eyebrows jump. “Oh, even better. A woman who enjoys the finer things!” His eyes fall to my arm and a look of shock crosses his face as he notices the bruises that I tried to cover with concealer. Obviously...didn’t conceal well enough. I pull down my sleeve to try to cover it, but he just looks away. “So, never seen you here before. You a local?”

Well, right from concern to ‘Come here often?’. The man works fast.

“I stay in Lebanon. The bar there doesn’t have karaoke, though, so I am here tonight.”

The door opens and I turn my head just enough to catch a blue canvas jacket in my peripheral vision. Dean’s here. Sam must’ve ratted on me. Shit. What the fuck is he gonna do? God, this was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have done this.

He stands in the doorway for a moment...before walking away to the corner. Does he think I didn’t see him? Great, so he’s just gonna sit there and watch me? Fine. I’ll give him something to watch, then.

I turn up the charm. I flirt like I used to flirt with Dean back at Harvelle’s. I laugh at everything the man says. His name is Craig and he’s a bank manager and he’s boring as sin but I laugh at his jokes and I tell him I work retail and “This is my Friday!” despite the fact that it’s Wednesday and I tell him I’m thinking about doing something nuts tonight and he is intrigued.

I ignore the cringe that goes up my spine as Craig puts his hand on my bare knee and starts inching my dress up my thigh. I refuse my urge to look over my shoulder to see Dean’s reaction. I giggle like a schoolgirl and put my hand on Craig’s shoulder.

“Why don’t we get out of here?” he suggests, throwing down money to pay for our drinks. He really thinks I’m gonna fuck him, but I think I’m gonna walk away once we get out of Dean’s sight...but I’ll let Dean think I fucked this guy.

“Okay,” I say, nodding and slipping off of the barstool. I wobble a bit on my heels. I’m gonna break my damn ankle in these shoes. I laugh it off. “Oops! Maybe I’ve had too much to drink. Can’t even walk in these shoes!”

Craig follows me out of the bar and wraps an arm around me, walking us toward a silver Beemer. I look behind us to see if Dean’s followed us out. He hasn’t. Good. I put my hand on Craig’s chest and stop him. “I think I might have had too much to drink.”

“That’s okay. I’ll take you home and you can sober up.” He’s not taking the hint.

“No, Craig, listen. I don’t think I should go home with you.”

He turns to look in my eyes. “Really? I bought your beers and you’re gonna blue-ball me?”

Of course. He thinks he’s entitled to my body because he bought me a couple beers. God, where do men get that idea? I bend down and pull my shoe off. “Look. Craig. You chose to buy my beers but if you want me to pay you back, I’ve got a twenty.” I reach into my left shoe and offer him the bill. He doesn’t take it. It’s not what he wants. “Just as I suspected. You don’t care about the money. I’m not going to fuck you. Take the money and walk away.”

He snatches the bill out of my hand and stomps away toward the Beemer. I put my shoe back on and walk in the opposite direction. Can’t take my car because I need Dean to think I left in the BMW. I end up in a park, staring at a still pond. There’s no life in that water, just the reflection of the moon. Isn’t that sad?

Aren’t I?

This entire event is sad. My entire life is. Why am I listening to Matilda? Why haven’t I just left? I’m a fucking hunter. I could stay off the radar until Dean got tired of looking for me. I mean, why would he look for me, anyway? Mattie says he has ‘real feelings’ for me, but I doubt it. I doubt it so fucking hard. Because look at us!

Look at our relationship. Look at the hill of sand we’ve built. We’re nothing. Still nothing after all these years.

Here I am, on a last-ditch effort to make him see that he has feelings for me, but I don’t think it’s going to work. I don’t think he cares. Especially now. Especially with that thing on his forearm. Why would he ever have feelings for me? I’m nothing...which is why he can’t have feelings for me.

Matilda was the first to say it; ‘Look at how he treats you’. Well, he treats me like shit now. He treats me like nothing...and I saw it. I saw it after the first time. I saw it in every word he said. I saw it in the way every encounter we had revolved around sex. I’m nothing more than a sexual release to him and this...this isn’t going to change anything.

But I wish it would. I wish he would see me.

He won't. He really won't. He never does.

I sit on the park bench for another hour before I head back to the bar. The Impala isn't in the parking lot anymore. Guess he left...and I can go home now.

I pull into the garage and shut off the engine. Dean's car is in the garage. Great.

I'm carrying my shoes as I walk down the stairs into the Bunker. I move quietly, almost sneaking toward my room. Am I really sneaking in like a teenager? Just trying to avoid that confrontation for a little while.

"You have fun with Craig?" I tense up as soon as I enter my room. I look to the left where the sound of Dean's voice came from. He's sitting on my dresser, sharpening his Bowie on a whetstone. He's not looking at me, just focusing on the knife. So much for avoiding the confrontation.

I set my shoes down. "You following me?"

"You avoiding the question?"

"Don't answer a question with a question."

"You did it first." He sets the whetstone beside him on the dresser and looks up from the knife. "Did you have fun with Craig?" he asks again.

I swallow and turn away from him. "Craig was perfectly fine."

"Yeah?" I flinch as he jumps down from the dresser, all rage and aggression again. I bend down to set my shoes next to the wall and avoid looking at him.

"Yeah."

"So you just...go pick up guys in bars now?" he asks and I tense up more.

"Didn't I meet you in a bar?" I snap.

I can feel him step closer to me. "Oh, and you think what happened with Craig is the same thing?"

"We had a few drinks and we had some fun to release some pent-up frustrations." I shrug. "Seems a lot like the same thing." He practically growls as steps closer again. Running out of room. I step away from him toward my bed.

"It is not the same-"

"Oh, please, Dean." I turn to him, frustration making me face his anger head-on. "You come to me when you need to get off and then you leave. You don't care about me and you don't like me.

"This shit again? I have told you a million times-"

"You can say it all you want, but your actions speak louder! You keep me around for convenience; you have for years. You treat me like nothing more than a sex toy."

"A sex toy?" he asks, his eyes going wide.

"Yes! I'm not your girlfriend! I'm not your partner! I'm not your friend! I'm just here for you to put your dick somewhere wet every few weeks! That's it!"

"Watch your tone," he says, his voice going dangerously low and his grip tightening on that knife. I should shut up. I should stop.

But I can't. Not now. "And you just keep getting worse! That shit on your arm is all well and good for using the First Blade but it's making you treat me even worse and I wasn't sure anything could be worse than your unbelievable apathy toward me!"

His jaw twitches as he steps closer. Now I'm starting to get scared. I swallow, try to step back, but there's nowhere else to go. "You think it can't get worse?" His free hand zips out and grabs my hair and I squeak. "It can get a lot fucking worse."

"Let me go," I try. I say it with the same conviction I said it last night, but he just twists his hand around and yanks my head back.

"Not this time, bitch." He leans down next to my ear. "You say you're a sex toy, maybe I should show you how a sex toy gets treated."

I gasp as the knife edge brushes my jaw. My heart was pounding with fury before but now it's rapidly beating with terror. "Dean," I whisper. It's a plea. I'm begging.

"Sex toys get fucked until they break. They get used until I'm fucking satisfied and then tossed aside. If you really think you're a fucking toy for me, then I shouldn't bother trying to be nice, should I?"

The knife is pressed into my neck. A single wrong move and there goes my carotid. He might really kill me. Oh, God. "Please. Don't."

"Why not? You let Craig use you. Isn't it my turn now?"

"Fine. Fine, you can use me, just put the knife away," I whimper. "I don't wanna die."

His hand tightens in my hair again for a moment...and then it releases. He steps back, eyes wide as he pants down at me. He looks like he's just realized what he was doing. He swallows as he looks down at the knife. He turns and starts to walk out of my room, rubbing at that stupid fucking Mark. "Pack your shit and get out. Don't come back."

What? 'Don't come-'. He can't be serious about--he's never wanted me to leave. This isn't...this isn’t right. This isn't what was supposed to happen. This isn't what Matilda predicted.

Don't come back. Fine! Fuck him. Put a damn knife to my throat. I don't wanna be here anyway. Haven't wanted to be here. Fuck him!

I pack my duffel with all my clothes and pack all of my other effects into an old wooden ammo box I bought at the flea market last year. I carry them both out to my car and toss them in the trunk before climbing into the driver's seat and taking off.

I'll go North. Canada is nice this time of year. Maybe Asa will let me crash with him and his mom. Haven't seen him in years, but he always answers my texts.

I gotta call Mattie though, because what the ever-loving fuck was that about?

"I know, I know. You're mad at me," she says as I speed toward the interstate that will take me North.

"No shit, Mattie. What the hell was that?"

"You wanted to leave, didn't you?" she asks.

"Yeah, but-"

"But this was the only way you could do that without him chasing you. It had to be his idea for you to go."

"You couldn't warn me? He put a knife to my throat!"

"That’s not the first time you've had a knife to your throat. It's just the first time the man you love has put a knife to your throat." I don't love him. "Yes, you do...but you don’t love that Mark or what it's doing to him. This was the only way to get away from that thing."

I sigh. "You could have warned me about the knife."

"You wouldn’t have gone through with it if I had and he never would have been appalled by his actions against you and he never would have sent you away. So thank me, woman."

"Thank you, Mattie. I...I guess."

"Drive safe. Don't text Asa until tomorrow. He's on a job tonight."

"Okay. Thanks for the...thanks for the exit."

"I've always got your back. Bye, hon."

I hang up and toss the phone on the passenger seat. I'll drive up toward Emerson and call Asa in the morning.

It's interesting. I feel...lighter. This wasn't how I wanted things to go, but…at least it's over.

~~~~

The Kitchen Sink Tags- @flamencodiva @sacriceria @lyarr24 @440mxs-wife @nancymcl @stephv213 @mariekoukie6661 @beachy2014 @alwayskeepfightingsweetheart @cosicas-cuquis @queenoftheunderdark @myheartbelongsintz

#cassie writes stuff #gaga for green eyes #dean bean #spn fanfic #reader insert #reader-insert #violence to reader #moc!dean

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aperrywilliams · 4 years ago

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The Request - Part I (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)

(Not my gif!)

Masterlist

Part I / Part II

———————

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader.

Summary: Reader is the Spencer’s best friend and although she has some doubts she'll ask him to do something big for her.

Word Count: 3238.

Warnings: Curses. Maybe the main subject could be awkward for some people. Angst mixed with other things.

A/N: I had this idea but I don´t know if could be enough for a part 2. Impressions, comments and any reaction are welcomed. Thanks for reading!

——————–

A new Monday. As always, I arrived to work 20 minutes before the usual check-in time. That gave me enough time to make my coffee and (Y/N)’s who should be arriving soon.

But time passed and there were no signs of (Y/N). That was odd. Maybe she faced a huge traffic jam. I was about to call her when I saw the elevator doors open, showing the (Y/N)’s figure. I breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of her. She was okay. At least I thought so.

When she passed through the glass doors I noticed her expression and concern returned to my me. Watery eyes, she walked with difficulty and dropped shoulders, as if she had a great weight on her body. Without a word she slumped into the chair next to her desk. Which was strategically next to mine.

She stared at the folders on her desk for several minutes almost without blinking. She hadn't even taken off her jacket and still had the purse on her lap. (Y/N) was clearly not okay.

“(Y/N)… are you ok?”. I asked. I couldn’t help but showed my concern about her. Hearing my voice, she realized that she was not alone and hastened to say something, trying to hide what was happening to her with a fake smile.

“Hey… Spencer. I’m sorry. I didn’t greet you…”. But I knew. Her voice was almost inaudible and it sounded cracked to me.

“It’s ok. You don´t need to. But… are you ok?." I asked again. She let out a heavy sigh.

“No. I’m not” she confessed. I got up from my chair and approaches to her.

“What’s wrong? You can tell me…” I said with the hope she could trust me enough and tell me what happened.

“I don´t want to. It´s so embarrassing and hurting. I don’t know how even I managed to get my ass here”. (Y/N) shook her head avoiding my gaze that was fixed on her.

“Please, maybe I can help”. She looked at me with her puffy eyes and a soft smile. For me were the most beautiful eyes on Earth even if they had been crying a river.

“Not here. Can we get a coffee in the cafeteria of first floor?. I don't want anyone on the team to see me like this”. She looked everywhere making sure that no one was looking at us.

“Of course. Come on”. I grabbed my blazer and phone and joined to (Y/N) towards the elevator.

With our coffees, we go out of the building to an interior patio. We sit down on a bench. (Y/N) took a sip of her coffee and started talking.

"Spencer, I broke up with Darren last night." Her expression was a combination of sadness, anger and defeat. It broke my heart to see her like this.

"(Y/N)... I didn’t know. I’m so sorry. But why? What happened?”.

"This is the part that I'm ashamed of ...". Her hands was trembling and I could see how new tears formed in her eyes and were rushing out. I just took her free hand and squeeze it gently to try to comfort her. She looked up at the ceiling trying to hold back the tears and then kept talking.

“The son of a bitch was cheating on me! And the worst part... is that I only knew it because yesterday morning his other ‘girlfriend’ appeared at the door of 'our' apartment saying she was pregnant with his child.” At this point (Y/N) started to cry wildly.

Oh God . This was worse than I thought. It was like a bad movie. Very bad movie.

"What?" I tried to hide my face of shock, but it was difficult. It really was like a bad joke. Although I'm not going to lie, it always seemed to me that Darren was an asshole and didn't deserve to be with (Y/N), but it wasn't my decision and if he made her happy, that was enough for me. Also they were together for a long time almost as long as the time I had been working with (Y/N).

"I know. How I didn’t realize before?. Spencer, I was so silly. I’m a profiler and my boyfriend has been cheating on me systematically for so long! And the bastard got another woman pregnant!”. The sobs had subsided. Now anger and resentment dominated her voice. I didn’t expect less from (Y/N). If I could have smacked him myself at that moment I would have done it gladly.

"I'm so sorry (Y/N). You don't deserve to be going through this." I opened my arms and wrapped her in an embrace. I hoped that would help in part. At least so she knew she wasn't alone in this.

"I don't know Spencer. I’m so confused. I really thought things were fine…”. (Y/N)' sobs returned, but now they were muffled in my chest. I wish I could have done more.

(Y/N) returned to the BAU feeling a little better after a few weeks of leave that Hotch granted her without asking too much questions. During this time away from work I made sure to visit or call her every day to check on how she was feeling. When I visited her, we talked a lot, drank coffee, watched movies or went out for walk. I think I did a good job as a best friend, making her focus, at least in those moments, on something other than her breakup.

I must admit my selfish being felt some happiness knowing that (Y/N) was no longer with Darren. Although the remorseful side of me felt bad about it. They were conflicting feelings to me. I didn’t like to see (Y/N) hurt for her breakup, but I could not bear to see her with someone who didn’t love her as the great woman she is.

The day she returned to work the first thing she did was hug me tight and thank me for being there for her. Though honestly I couldn’t imagine myself doing something other than what I did.

Months passed, but (Y/N) was never the same. I don't blame her. Surely she thought was going to marry Darren. Before what happened, (Y/N) always was showing her happy spirit to everyone. And it was contagious. She constantly was in a good mood, even making Hotch laugh. Now she looked silent, withdrawn. During the flights it was more frequent to see her in the furthest jet' seat reading or deep in thought instead of playing poker with the rest of the team.

On one of those flights, I sat next to her. When (Y/N) saw me, closed the book she was reading and looked at me with a smile. At least I had open access to (Y/N)'s smiles, and that soothed me, although I knew there was an internal struggle in her head beyond all the things she had entrusted to me before. I didn't know what it was, but it sure kept her uneasy.

"You missed poker," I said smiling.

"I didn't feel like losing today," she replied, resting her head on my shoulder.

“Me neither, and JJ ended up winning. I'm disappointed in myself”. I tried to joke.

"Yes, that speaks very badly of you Dr. Spencer 'Vegas' Reid." She let out a genuine laugh that filled my heart. For a second I felt the old (Y/N) reappear. But as soon as she let out that laugh, that was how quickly it disappeared, giving way to a deep sigh.

"What is it? Where does that sigh come from?" I dared to ask her. After a brief second, she replied.

"I'm tired. This case was hard,” she said. I took her hand and started stroking it with my thumb.

"Yes I know. But I think there is something else that bothers you besides the case itself.” She raised her head to look at me and smiled again.

"I have to rehearse my poker faces with you, apparently," she said with a frown .

"Or you could just tell me what's going on" I replied stroking her hand without releasing it.

"True. I could...”

"You should. We are friends, aren't we?”. That reason works 99% of the time with her. She nodded. After a few minutes in silence, she broke it.

"There's something I haven't told you about this whole situation with Darren... and that's what has kept me thinking for a while..." She paused her story for a few seconds. Possibly she was thinking how to find the right words. "For a time with Darren we were trying to have children..."

I couldn't say I was completely surprised. (Y/N) was in a relationship with her boyfriend for almost 4 years. It was reasonable to think they were ready to start a family at some point. I didn't like the image my mind was picturing, but it was something to be expected.

“And well, at some point we realized maybe there was a problem. But we didn't want to delve into that and time passed. After what happened, I kept thinking… if he did it with another woman, maybe I was the one with the problem…”. (Y/N) paused a little to examine my face.

"Are you blaming yourself for not getting pregnant ?" I asked her.

"Yes. I did. But as good Dr. Reid always says, 'Look for the evidence first.' And that's what I did next . A while ago I went to the doctor and had many tests. And... yes, the big conclusion is I’m the problem... it is very likely that I can never have children by my own, Spencer." I could see how (Y/N) bit her lower lip to avoid showing the wave of feelings that were surely stuck in her chest at that time.

"(Y/N)... how can you be so sure of that ...? Maybe if you talk to another doctor...". She put one finger from her free hand to my lips to stop me from speaking.

"Spencer, it's okay. You don't have to say or do anything. I'm telling you so that you know I trust you and that I'll be fine. I just have to get used to the idea…”. It was obvious she had been thinking about this subject for a long time, because she managed to contain herself and be strong. I raised her hand taken with mine and brought it to my lips to stamp a warm kiss.

"You know you can count on me for anything, right?. Whatever, what you need. If you want a second opinion, I can help you find one. Or if you just want to talk about this…”. I said outlining a smile and looking directly into her eyes so she knew my words were true. I didn't know what else to offer that could help her. Sure she felt overwhelmed. (Y/N) nodded and a "thank you" came from her lips before resting her head on my shoulder again.

It was hard not to think all the times in the past few years when I might have noticed signs of (Y/N)'s intentions. Some things made sense to me. Sometimes we joked about a faraway future. Most of the time she hinted a wish of having a big family, a house, and a dog. I wanted it too, and I always told her I was sure she would get it before me.

Weeks passed and in our conversations with (Y/N) the subject didn’t return. A couple of times I tried to ask her how she felt about it, but she just shrugged, told me she was accepting it, and then changed the subject. So I chose to drop it and trust when she was ready to speak, she would.

One morning arriving at the BAU after a case and before going to our respective places to sleep, (Y/N) approached me and asked me to go at her apartment for dinner at night. I stared at her with intriguing eyes. Seeing my face, she hastened to explain.

“I wish we could talk, but now we both need to sleep. Today at 8:00 works for you?”. I nodded accepting the invitation. Maybe she was ready to talk.

When she opened the door greeted me with a smile, but I could immediately perceive some nervousness in her. I couldn't tell the reason. I also didn't want to ask, yet. We sat down to eat and with (Y/N) only talked about trivial things: the last case, about the book she was reading, that she talked to her mother that afternoon, that the car was faulty and she had to send it to repair. I kept noticing the anxiety and the times I glanced at her, she tried to avoid prolonged eye contact with me.

We were drinking the post dinner coffee and I couldn't stand the insecurity anymore. I had to ask what was going on.

"I don't think you asked me to dinner just to talk about these things ..." She shook her head and settled into the chair to try to calm her nerves, which were already evident by now.

"It’s true. There is something 'less trivial' I want to talk to you about,” she confessed before taking another sip of her coffee.

"Well. I'm all ears. You can tell me. You know you can tell me anything and trust me, right?"

"I know. And I really appreciate it. I couldn't be discussing this with anyone else." She paused for a few moments, rested her hands on the table, intertwining her fingers . "Okay. Do you remember I told you about I was trying to get pregnant when I was with Darren, about my suspicions, and my visits to the doctor?”

“Yes, I remember. You never wanted to talk about that again."

"Yes. I was trying to get used to the idea. But, I don't know, I didn't want to quit yet. Although I don’t like to keep false hopes. The thing is, I listened to you and asked for a second opinion. I got new tests and the results are similar to the first time... only they opened up a little hope for me.” (Y/N)’s eyes lit up as she said it.

"That is good news, isn't it? What did they tell you?" I was quick to ask.

"I have a chance if I try artificial insemination. Now we both know what the odds mean… they are not certainties…”

“I know… it's still good news, isn't it? Are you going to try?”

"Yes. I want to do it” she said with determination.

"And what is coming now?" It wasn’t an easy question. (Y/N) was not in a relationship right now.

"Now I have to get a sperm donor. It could be an anonymous donor since I currently have no partner…”

"I understand and yeah, and anonymous donor is an option if you don't want to wait for a partner… ”

"Yes. I would have liked that. But by now it's not possible… and I don't want to wait to know if it will work or not…”

"I get it. So… you want to try it now.”

"Yes. But... my first choice is not an anonymous donor,” she said suddenly. I looked at her curiously. Could it be she already has a new boyfriend and is what she wants to tell me?

"No?, what is your first option?"

"You". She said fixing her eyes on me.

I felt like I was short of breath and had trouble swallowing. Was what I was hearing true? Above all the scenarios I had pictured in my mind in those last minutes, this was the least plausible to me.

"Me?"

"Yes. I know it is unexpected and it may seem strange to you, but believe me I thought a lot about it. And I want do this with someone who understands my situation and who I can trust. I don't know... an anonymous donor complicates me and I know that would be the most reasonable thing... but... I can’t. Doctor told me the odds could improve if the potential donor could accept taking some studies and eventually follow a treatment. Spencer, I’m so sorry, I'm pushing you to a difficult situation…”

My feelings conflicted at the time . She wanted me to be her donor. But would that change things between us?. She was asking me for a favor as a friend. What if it work out? Eventually (Y/N) would have a child of mine... where was I in this equation? I held my head in both hands. It was too much to process.

"Yes... I mean, I understand what you are saying. It makes sense, but if everything works out… we'll have a child…”

Doesn't she see the consequences of that?

“If it work out, you have no any obligation Spencer. I only…"

"Yeah, you only need my sperm. I get it…". I got up from my chair and started pacing around the room. My head was running 1000 revolutions per second.

"I don't want this to sound like I'm using you. Sorry. You don't have to accept. Just forget what I said, ok?”

"Why me? Is it just because we are friends?" Surely that last question was not entirely expected, because her face winced.

“Spencer, is everything. Because we are friends, because I couldn’t trust another person as I do with you, because you understand my situation. Because... because you are a wonderful person..."

"You know my genes might not be that wonderful..." I said with a bitter smile.

"Spencer... that's not what I mean, you know that...".

"Would you let me be a part of their life...?".

"Only if you want…". Her watery eyes told me it was true. That there was no bad intention on her part.

"This will make our friendship change, you know that, right?"

"Yes. I know. But it doesn't have to be a bad thing… besides… they are probabilities, right? ”. I nodded. I slowly approached her, taking her chin and lifting her face to me. When she finally looked at me, I started to dry her tears with my thumbs.

“Do you remember I told you that you could count on me for anything? I meant it. Even if you only want my sperm now,” I said smiling at her. That made her laugh a little. She got up from the chair and hugged me tight.

"Thanks... thank you so much!" (Y/N) said as she buried her face in my chest. Her tears were now of joy.

I could only close my eyes and hold her tight against my body. I knew this could be a huge mistake, but (Y/N) deserved a chance and if she believed that I could help her, I was not going to refuse despite all my apprehensions. Although it could mean a future torture just thinking we could have something so intimate in common and still be just friends. Even there were chances it would not work, for me the line between us had crossed.

Would it be possible to go further in the future? Could (Y/N) ever see me with different eyes? With the eyes with which I looked at her every day? Could I allow me to feed that little hope? I expected the future might one day be on my side. I allowed myself to have that wish. Time would tell whether or not I was right accepting her request.

——————–

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #criminal minds #spencer reid angst #dr. spencer reid

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fanfic-corner · 4 years ago

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Bed Sharing

I created this list probably about a month or so ago, and I remember being so hopeful for the finale. I never dreamt we would get semi-canon Destiel, but I also never imagined the finale would be that disappointing. I will be posting a list of 15x20 fics, but for now, take this fluff and ignore your problems for a while.

Lock and Key by tricia_16 on AO3. (144,500 words).

Tags: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bookstore Owner Castiel, Musician Dean Winchester, Friends to Lovers, Keeping Secrets, Mutual Pining, Flirting, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Smut, Virgin Castiel, Angry Sex, Dubious Content, Recreational Drug Use, Fluff, Dating, Song Lyrics, Sharing a Bed, Happy Ending.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: In a world where people get songs stuck in their heads whenever their soulmate is singing out loud, Castiel discovers that being soulmates with an aspiring singer/songwriter can be taxing, to say the least. Finding said soulmate, learning that he's the most attractive human being on the face of the earth, and then not being able to tell him he’s meant for you? It turns out that's even worse. Not having a soulmate is just the icing on the cake on an already crappy life, if you ask Dean. He wants to sell his songs, but he's terrified of singing them himself. He wants to be a mechanic, but he's stuck selling parts, instead. He wants to kiss the ever loving fuck out of Sam's girlfriend's boss, too, but the guy's holding out for his soulmate, which of course means Dean doesn't even have a shot....right?

Notes: The pure terror that struck me at the end of chapter one nearly made me dip out of this, but I stuck through it, and was 100% rewarded with the ending (I screamed. I think everyone is worried about me now).

Stand By Me by whelvenwings on AO3. (31,252 words).

Tags: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Post-Apocalypse, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed, Slow Dancing, Smut, First Kiss, Canon-Typical Violence, Touch-Starved Dean, Love Confessions.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: Dean Winchester has been alone for a long, long time. When he and Castiel happen to find each other - a couple of survivors in a world that’s been all but wiped clean - Dean’s looking for his brother; Castiel is looking for something to look for. They stick together, because neither of them much wants to be alone. They hate each other at first, of course. Dean hates Castiel for being weird and quiet and ironic and antagonistic and proud. Castiel hates Dean for being blunt and reckless and coarse, for drinking, for refusing to talk about how he feels and just pretending everything is fine. Most of all, they hate themselves and each other just for being alive. What right do they have to be alive? No one else seems to be. But against his own will, Dean starts to notice things about Castiel that he likes. Starts to hope that Castiel might like him, too. And together, they start to fight for a world where they're both alive - and that's a good thing.

Notes: I know I have recced this multiple times before but it is one of my all time favourite fics so I won’t apologise! It is so cute, and it has everything you could ask for in a fic.

Partnered by K_K_TiBal on AO3. (28,112 words).

Tags: Minor Donna/Jody, Minor Eileen/Sam, Detective Dean Winchester, Lieutenant Castiel, Undercover as Married, Suburbia, Drug Use, Sharing a Bed, Pining, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fake Marriage, Falling in Love, Love Confessions, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Demisexual Castiel, Demiromantic Dean Winchester.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: Dean didn't think that his life as a detective could get much worse after Castiel was promoted to lieutenant. Castiel was a stickler for the rules, had no sense of humour, and never seemed to give Dean a break, even though they used to be partners. But then, despite all of their questionable history, the two are asked to go undercover on a case in the wealthy suburbs of California. . . as a married couple.

Notes: I am screaming, that was so f*cking cute! And the artwork was gorgeous, too. Also, now I ship Jody and Donna. Cas gave off such Holt vibes in this, I was convinced I accidentally started reading a Brooklyn Nine-Nine fic (do those exist?)

the cost of a thing by quiettewandering on AO3. (74,198 words).

Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fake Marriage, Human Castiel, Protective Dean Winchester, Touch-Starved Castiel, Mutual Pining, Jealous Dean Winchester, Slow Burn, Depressed Castiel, Fake/ Pretend Relationship, Sharing a Bed.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: 16 months ago, Cas became human. 12 months ago, Cas left the bunker and a broken-hearted Dean behind. Now they must work a case together, where married couples are dying mysterious deaths and the only way to earn the neighbors' trust is by pretending to be married. Slowly, Dean finds that he loves being in a relationship with Cas, fake or not, and Cas finds his loneliness retreating, despite the harsh reality looming right around the corner. As Dean and Cas navigate this fake, but all too real, relationship, can they find the monster that is on a mysteriously motivated killing spree before it’s too late?

Notes: So cute! My favourite trope! And, as an added bonus, the sharing of a bed.

flowers in the backyard by justkeeponwriting on AO3. (34,710 words).

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Homeless Castiel, Domestic Fluff, Sharing a Bed, Minor Character Death, References to Depression, Angst with a Happy Ending, Smut.

My Rating: 4 stars.

Description: After Uncle Bobby’s death, Dean goes to check up on the cabin that he’s inherited. Dean hasn’t been at the cabin for years, but he knows Bobby hasn’t renovated it in ages, so he isn’t very thrilled to be saddled with it. Upon arrival, he notices that unlike he expected, it’s not unoccupied, nor falling apart – instead, a stranger called Castiel has made it into his home.

Notes: This was such a relaxing and gentle read, I nearly fell asleep after I finished it! Cas & Dean’s tentative relationship was written absolutely beautifully, too.

What Happened In Vegas by Ltleflrt on AO3. (18,447 words).

Tags: Sam/Eileen, Alternate Universe - No Supernatural, Teacher Dean, Photographer Castiel, Las Vegas Wedding, Secret Relationship, Sharing a Bed, Switch Dean, Switch Castiel, Fluff.

My Rating: 4 stars.

Description: Long time friends Dean and Castiel are road tripping from Chicago to San Diego for Sam and Eileen’s wedding, and a pitstop in Las Vegas turns into drunken love confessions and a surprise marriage. Turns out the pining has been mutual this whole time, but now they’re finally together and on cloud-fucking-nine. Until they remember that this trip isn’t supposed to be about them. To avoid undermining Sam and Eileen’s important weekend, they decide to keep their new relationship status a secret. They’ll keep the heart eyes toned down and their hands to themselves, but the struggle is real.

Notes: Oh my lord, this was absolutely hilarious (especially that last piece of art - I totally lost it) and adorable. I can totally imagine Dean and Cas getting a cheesy Vegas wedding, and we can all dig Elvis (sorry).

Stories Are Made of Mistakes by wildhoneypie on AO3. (4,942 words).

Tags: Human Castiel, Diners, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Bisexual Dean, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Case Fic, Domestic, Didn’t Know They Were Dating.

My Rating: 4 stars.

Description: In which Cas is human and doesn't understand basic concepts like: clothing, Mythbusters, moisturizer, and Greek food. Dean is...Dean and doesn't understand basic concepts like: boyfriends, language, how to tell your friend that he's a walking miracle, and when not to quip.

Notes: This was so cute and I live for human Cas. I also love the recurring ‘no fucking quipping’ joke in this, although the idea of Cas swearing broke me a bit!

Sharing the Rain Dog by almaasi on AO3. (19,837 words).

Tags: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternative Universe - Historical (1999), Fluff, Romance, No Angst, Accidental Dating, First Dates, Rain, Dogs, Pets, FBI Agent Castiel, Musician Dean, Singer Dean, Flustered Dean, Domestic Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Moving In Together, Living Together, First Kiss, Sharing a Bed, Cuddling, Smut.

My Rating: 4 stars.

Description: When some asshole hits a dog with his car and drives off, the first two people on the scene are Dean and Castiel. Castiel's an FBI agent with a plane to catch, and he doesn't have time to take the dog to the vet. Dean's a musician, and he doesn't have the money. An agreement is reached: Dean goes, Castiel pays, and they'll exchange details and meet again to work things out. But who gets the dog? Sooner or later they're going to realise that having shared custody of one pitbull isn't ideal. She needs one home, not two. One stable, loving home...

Notes: Rain Dog was so cute, and so was flustered Dean! The hitting a dog joke is starting to get out of hand, though.

This Game We Play by destieldrabblesdaily on AO3. (1,195 words).

Tags: High School AU, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Bed Sharing.

My Rating: 3 stars.

Description: Dean and Castiel have been best friends since they were little, and sleepovers are a common event. They've always loved playing the game where they draw out letters on each others backs and try to guess what the other is writing. Even though sixteen seems to be a bit too old to still play the game, Castiel uses it as a chance to silently confess something that he's been wanting to share with Dean for a long time.

Notes: This was adorable. I am 100% here for Cas and Dean being childhood friends.

Minty Fresh Kisses by almaasi on AO3. (7,905 words).

Tags: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Motel Rooms, Teeth, Dean in Love, Human Castiel, First Kiss, Pancakes, Sharing a Bed, Fluff, Dean POV, One Shot.

My Rating: 3 stars.

Description: Dean teaches a newly-human Castiel how to brush his teeth properly. Things don't go according to plan – but for once, the unexpected development actually presents a more promising outcome.

Notes: This was so sweet, and Cas was so cute as a human! Also, I love fics where Sam is just done with the constant sexual tension, it always makes me laugh.

Wee Little Love Child by almaasi on AO3. (10,649 words).

Tags: Fluff, Romance, Kid Fic, Team Free Will, De-Aged Sam Winchester, Cursed Sam Winchester, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, Sam Winchester ships Dean/Cas, Matchmaker Rowena, Parent Castiel, Parent Dean, Affectionate Dean, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Sharing a Bed, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Domestic Fluff.

My Rating: 3 stars.

Description: After being magically de-aged, little Sammy is under the impression that Dean and Cas are his parents. He wants to know if they're in love, but they can't (or won't) give a consistent answer. The thing is, they have to grant Sam's greatest wish in order to reverse the curse, but they can only do that as a pair. What does Sam want most? For Dean and Cas to express their true feelings. Aloud. To each other.

Notes: Aw, I love Rowena, and I am 100% here for her cursing Sam just to get Dean and Cas to stop being idiots and actually get together.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again: the fans are in control now. We control the Supernatural content we are getting, so please create the ending you would want to see. And, if anyone wants to talk or rant or suggest a fic, I am always here.

#bed sharing #destiel #spnfamily #supernatural #fanfiction #ficrec

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debbiechanclub · 4 years ago

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Best Two Out of Three, Part 8

@what-does-mine-say and I just keep cranking these out because we’re a tad bit obsessed XD. I’m a little nervous about this part? And I don’t know why? Everyone is mad at each other so brace yourselves.

Also: thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the support for this fic. My only hope is to make y’all happy with my words.

Best Two Out of Three

Part: 8/26

Pairing: Kenny Omega x OFC and Adam Page x OFC

Warnings: Alcohol use, language, angst

Word Count: 3.3k

Catch up on previous parts here.

Alex pushed her way back into the Best Friends’ locker room. James sent her a look from where he sat on the couch, watching the monitor in the corner. “Well. You won, at least,” he commented.

She completely ignored him as she crossed the room and sat down in her cubby. She was not in the mood—and it was obvious. He gave an apologetic sigh. “I’m sure Adam didn’t mean to do what he did,” he said. “Things happen in the heat of the moment.”

She continued to ignore him as she rifled through her suitcase. All she wanted was to get changed and leave—

“Alex.”

“What?” She glared at him. He frowned.

“Are you okay?”

The genuine look of concern on his face made her stop. No, she wasn’t okay. But before she could say so, Chuck and Trent came through the door. Neither of them so much as looked at Alex as they walked into the room. She grabbed her clothes and started for the bathroom—but then Trent said something that made her stop dead in her tracks.

“Are you fucking Kenny again?”

Chuck let out a frustrated breath. “Dude, come on,” he said; but Alex spoke over him.

“What?” Her voice came out in a hiss, full of venom. She couldn’t believe the nerve of him, asking her a question like that in front of Chuck and James. It wasn’t any of his business.

But he didn’t really care. “Chuck told me what happened before we left the hotel last week. And after what just happened out there… it sure seems like there’s something you need to come clean about, Alex.”

Alex took a step closer. “That’s not any of your fucking business, Trent.”

He scoffed. “That’s a yes.”

“Dude, lay off!” Chuck unexpectedly burst. “You’re being a total dick right now!”

Trent’s eyebrows arched. “I’m being a dick? She’s the one who’s been toying with your emotions for the last year!”

“WHAT?” Alex exclaimed. She was incensed. It took all of her not to throw her clothes in Trent’s face. Chuck must have thought she might because he jumped up and stood between them.

“Alex, I don’t think that, I swear,” he said. But Trent wasn’t done.

“Oh, don’t play dumb,” he spat. “You flirted with Chuck all the time while you were fucking Kenny last year because you knew he’d give you the attention you wanted but weren’t getting from Kenny. You take advantage of his feelings for you, Alex.”

“TRENT, SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Chuck whirled around to glare at him. James jumped up and stood between them.

“Okay, now’s probably not the best time for this,” he implored. But Alex had heard enough.

“Fuck you, Trent,” she spat. “And get off your high horse before you break your neck. It’s not like you’ve never tried it with me despite anyone’s feelings.”

She threw her clothes forcefully across the room and started toward the exit. Chuck’s shoulders slumped. “Alex, he’s not speaking for me!” he called. But she was already halfway out the door, trying to ignore the tears stinging at the back of her eyes.

* * * * * * * * * *

“I told you he couldn’t be trusted!”

Callie burst into The Elite’s dressing room. She half-hoped Kenny would be there so she could tell him exactly what she thought of him—but he wasn’t. Honestly, it was probably for the best.

“I know,” Adam breathed. He was still heated from his interaction with Kenny at ringside. He didn’t understand it. “I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt… but he acted like a fucking asshole out there.”

He sat down on the sofa at the far end of the room and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Kenny had said to him before he’d left. Question me all you want, but this one’s on you. And the more he thought about it, the angrier he became.

Callie rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re sleeping with each other again,” she muttered.

Adam bit down on his jaw. As angry as he was with the situation, Alex was still his friend and that wasn’t his business to tell. So, he changed the subject. “I’m sorry, Cal. I’m sorry I got you disqualified. I just felt like I was the only person in your corner out there, and it pissed me off. It shouldn’t have been that way.”

Callie moved to sit beside him. “No, don’t apologize.” She placed one hand on his arm and the other on his back as she rested her head on his shoulder. “I love you even more for sticking up for me out there. Even though Alex is your friend, I never doubted you. I knew you had my back.”

Adam squeezed her hand on his arm and placed a kiss on her forehead. “Of course I did.”

Callie leaned into his touch; but then she winced. “Ow.” She reached up to rub the back of her neck; that running knee Alex hit her with had done a number on more than just her mouth.

Adam’s brow furrowed. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” she breathed. “Just sore.”

“Here.” He adjusted so that he could massage her neck, rubbing his thumbs in firm circles over the muscle. He leaned forward and placed feather-light kisses on her skin, moving down her neck to her upper back and across her shoulders. Callie let out a contented hum as she placed her hand on his thigh. He growled lowly in her ear. “You know what that noise does to me.”

Callie raised her eyebrows and sent him an innocent smirk. “Do I?” She turned and leaned toward him. “I think I might go take a hot shower; see if that helps ease some of the pain.”

Adam didn’t need to be told twice. He stood from the couch and pulled her to her feet, into his body. “Is that an invitation?”

She didn’t say anything. She just reached up and pressed her lips against his—right as Kenny walked through the door.

He froze like a deer in headlights when he saw them. “I’m just getting my phone,” he said. He moved across the room toward his bag, trying to get in and out as quickly as possible; but Callie cut her eyes at him.

“Thanks for having my back out there.”

Kenny bit down on his jaw. “I’m not the one who cost you the match.”

“Oh, fuck you, Kenny!” Adam erupted. He took a step toward him. “I saw that little smirk on your face when Alex hit Callie with that running knee. You weren’t in her corner any more than Chuck and Trent were.”

Kenny put his hands on his hips and looked up at the ceiling. He knew he and Adam needed to talk, but not right now. It wouldn’t solve anything right now. He took a breath and looked him in the eye. “You’re upset, and I get it. But I’m not doing this right now.”

He grabbed his phone and started toward the door. Adam yelled after him. “Oh yeah, walk away. Alex knows what that’s like.”

Kenny paused, his hand white-knuckled on the doorknob. He had half a mind to turn back around and punch Adam. But he just sent him a hard look over his shoulder and went out the door to find Alex.

He typed up a text to her as he walked down the hall, but he didn’t need to send it. He found her as he rounded a corner; and as soon as she saw him, her face crumpled up and she started to cry.

He rushed toward her. “Baby, what’s wrong?” He took her face in his hands and looked down at her with concern in his eyes. “Why are you crying?”

“Trent…”

That was all she said before she buried her face in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. “What did he do?”

Her words came out muffled and tear-ridden. “He asked about us… and then we got in a fight and—”

A choked sob interrupted her. Kenny pulled back and wiped the tears from her cheeks. “Come on, let’s find somewhere we can talk.”

He took her by the hand and led her down the hall until they found an empty room. He brought her over to the couch and sat her down, rubbing soothing circles over her back. “Tell me what happened,” he gently said.

Her shoulders shook as she spoke. “Trent and Chuck hate me.”

His brow furrowed with confusion. “What? No. They’re your best friends. Why would they hate you?”

She looked back up at him, her eyes watery and red. And then she said, “I think Chuck’s in love with me.”

That only confused Kenny further. “What?”

Alex buried her face in her hands. Kenny wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into him. And then, for better or worse, she let it all out.

“When we were in Vegas for Double or Nothing last year we all got really drunk and Chuck told me he loved me. But I didn’t think anything of it, and it became like a running joke and Trent and James always make fun of him for it and Chuck always denies it. But in the locker room just now Trent flat-out asked if I was fucking you again and then he accused me of toying with Chuck’s emotions because I flirt with him and—and now I feel like I’ve just been hu-hurting Chuck this whole time and like I’m a te-terrible fucking per-person…”

Her body wracked with sobs and she couldn’t speak anymore. Kenny hugged her as tight as he could. “You’re not a terrible person,” he assured. “And they don’t hate you; I promise. Trent’s just an asshole.”

She pulled back and looked up at him. “Are you upset?”

“What?” he repeated. “No! Absolutely not! Why would I be upset?”

“Because we just worked things out and now I’m telling you I think my best friend is in love with me,” her words broke as she finished; but Kenny adamantly shook his head.

“No. How Chuck might feel doesn’t change anything about how I feel, Alex. We worked things out and that’s all that matters.”

Alex’s lip trembled again, and she reached up and wrapped her arms tight around his neck, clinging to him as if he were the only thing that mattered in the world. Kenny returned her embrace, squeezing her tight. Telling her without words that she had nothing to worry about.

She sniffled as she pulled back so she could look at him again. “I just want to go back to the hotel with you and forget about all this.”

He frowned as he wiped her cheeks dry again. “I wish we could. But you know I can’t leave yet, baby. We’ll go as soon as we can, alright?”

She just nodded, tears in her eyes.

He kissed her forehead. “How about we just stay here for a while?”

She nodded again. He leaned back against the couch, bringing her with him. She pulled her feet up as he drew her into his side, tucking her underneath his arm. And as she snuggled against him, Alex felt like Kenny was the only thing that made sense.

* * * * * * * * * *

Later that night, Alex rested with her head on Kenny’s bare chest as they laid together on the bed in his hotel room. In the interest of taking things slow, she hadn’t planned on sleeping in his room that night—but that had been before the fight with Trent. It had been awful telling Chuck that she was staying with Kenny; she’d barely been able to look at him. Eventually, they would have to talk about what Trent had said. But not tonight. She couldn’t handle having that conversation tonight.

“How’re you feeling?” Kenny traced his fingers over her skin as he held her. It sent a pleasant tingle up her spine.

“Better,” she said. “But I’m dreading having to face Chuck and Trent tomorrow.”

He let out an agitated breath. “Yeah, I want to talk to Trent.”

She pushed herself up to look at him in surprise. “Why?”

“Because I don’t like what he said to you, Alex. Our relationship is our business, and I’m not just gonna let him get away with speaking to you the way he did.”

Alex bit her lip as he looked into her eyes. It turned her on more than she’d expected it would, hearing how protective he was. But it also worried her. “You can talk to Trent; I actually wouldn’t mind seeing you put him in his place,” she said. “But I would appreciate if you left Chuck out of it. He actually stuck up for me against Trent tonight.”

Kenny nodded. “Of course. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to.”

She smiled and placed her head back on his chest, content.

“I need to talk to Adam, too.”

Alex’s brow furrowed. “About what he did during the match?”

She felt him shake his head. “No. I didn’t like how he put his hands on you, but that’s not it.” He paused. And then he said, “He said something to me back in the locker room that really pissed me off.”

Alex sat up to look at him again. “What did he say?”

Kenny’s face fell. “It was a low-blow comment about how I treated you before. He implied I walked away from you.” He shook his head. “It took all of me not to haul off and punch him.”

Alex frowned at the remorse in his eyes. And suddenly, she felt protective of him.

She moved so that she straddled his lap. He ran his hands up her thighs as she leaned toward him. “Fuck what Adam or anyone else thinks. We worked things out and that’s all that matters,” she said; and she kissed him.

Kenny grabbed her hips, eagerly deepening the kiss as she moved against him. She nipped his bottom lip as she moved her mouth to his neck. He let out a growl. “I thought you wanted to take things slow?”

“Tonight’s a special circumstance,” she purred. “You’re upset, and I want to make you feel better.”

He emitted another satisfied groan and leaned back against the pillows as she kissed her way across his chest and down his abdomen, moving lower and lower. She reached the waistband of his shorts—and her phone vibrated loudly from the nightstand.

Kenny leaned up. “Was that yours?”

“Yeah,” she breathed in annoyance. She reached for her phone, intending to silence it and carry on; but her brow furrowed when she saw the screen. It was a text from Adam.

“What is it?” Kenny asked.

She pursed her lips as she picked up the phone and unlocked it. She read the message silently to herself before answering Kenny. “It’s Adam. He wants me to meet him at the bar.”

Kenny rolled his eyes. “Of course,” he said as he flopped back down against the pillows.

Alex frowned, still straddling him. “I don’t have to go.”

“No; I know, baby,” he apologetically returned. “I’m sorry. You just got me all worked up.” He drew in a deep breath. “I actually think you should go talk to him.”

That surprised her. “You do?”

He nodded. “Yeah. He’s your friend, and I know what happened during the match is weighing on you. If you can work it out with him tonight, it’ll be one less thing worrying you tomorrow.”

Alex bit her lip. He made a compelling argument. But the thought of talking to Adam made her suddenly nervous—especially after what Kenny had just told her he’d said.

“Go,” Kenny gently encouraged. He gave her smirk. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

She gave him a small smile. He was right; it would be one less thing weighing on her if she and Adam could make amends tonight.

She climbed off him and changed into a pair of jeans. Once she’d pulled on her shoes, she gave Kenny a kiss. “I’ll try to make it quick.”

“Please,” he breathed, and she hurried out the door.

She made it down to the bar in two minutes. Adam was already there, sitting at the bar with two glasses of whiskey in front him. Alex arched a brow as she walked over.

“Rough night?”

He pursed his lips. “One of them is yours.” He slid a glass toward her. “It’s a peace offering.”

She eyed the drink as she slid onto the stool next to him. “Is it the cheap shit?”

He smirked. “Maker’s Mark.”

She bobbled her head. “That works.” She took the glass—but then she paused. “Does Callie know about this?”

He rolled his eyes. “Yes,” he assured. “I figured it’d be better to meet you in neutral territory than go up to your room.”

Alex took a sip of the whiskey. It burned on the way down. “Well, you wouldn’t have found me there anyway. I’m actually staying with Kenny tonight.”

Adam’s eyebrows arched when he heard that. “So I guess you two talked, then?”

She nodded. “Yeah. We’re taking things slow.”

He laughed lightly to himself as he brought his glass to his lips. “Sleeping in his room doesn’t sound like taking things slow.”

“Well, I wasn’t planning on it,” she shot. “But Trent and I got in a huge fucking fight in the locker room after the match, so I’d rather just keep my distance for now.”

Adam’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Why did you and Trent get in a fight?”

Alex let out a breath. “Kenny,” she simply answered. And then she added, “Speaking of fights, Kenny told me you had something smart to say to him in the locker room.”

She sent him a sidelong glance. She could tell by the look on his face that she didn’t need to clarify what she meant. “Well, it’s like I said when we talked, Alex. I don’t want you to get hurt again.”

Alex looked away again and took another drink. She understood his concern, but she was over listening to other people’s opinions about her personal life. It must have been obvious, too, because Adam changed the subject.

“I’m sorry for what I did during the match tonight,” he said. “I let my emotions get the best of me.”

Alex scoffed. “Well there’s one thing you and Callie have in common.”

“Alex, come on,” Adam returned. “I don’t want to fight with you.”

She frowned down into her glass. “I don’t want to fight with you, either.” She gripped the glass harder. There was something on the tip of her tongue, and she wasn’t sure if she should say it. But she couldn’t bottle it up any longer. “I miss the way things used to be, Adam,” she said. “Before you started dating Callie. I miss my drinking buddy.”

She turned and looked him in the eye. Adam’s face fell. “I can still be your drinking buddy, Alex. That doesn’t have to change.”

His eyes were so sincere; so sad. And even though Alex desperately wanted to believe him, she just couldn’t. “I’m gonna go. Thanks for the drink.” She downed the rest of the whiskey and grimaced as she stood from the bar. Adam didn’t try to stop her as she left. He didn’t know what to say.

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shesawriter39049 · 5 years ago

Text

|ROLL DEEP|M| P.1

*Yoongi centered fic with a shared OT7 plot*

CH.1.1 CH. 1.2

**Operation: What’s eating blue!?***

_________________________________________________________

“Stop, this stopped being a you, thing and became a us thing the minute we chose to show up here tonight! You gave us an out and we stayed...we will always stay...”

1.2 K Sneak Peek

Pairing: Yoongi x OC

Genre: Sugar baby AU/Suspense/Smut/Angst/Roomate AU/FWB AU

WC: 7K

Nonsexual Warnings: Mentions of drug use (Molly/weed/)Strong language/ Alcohol addictions/ brief mentions/ speculations of domestic violence/abuse

Sexual Warnings: Oral (M & F receiving) power bottom Min Yoongi, cum play, breath play, spanking, dirty talk, Slight overestimation, sex toys (Cock rings....) Semi-public sex (A chill little blow job in the car) The sexual warnings are for both parts of CH.1 so the smut is split in half!

NOTE: Just to clarify the dynamic Yoongi and the OC are roommates who hookup on the side, they are BOTH sugar babies to two separate people! So yes, that would imply that Yoongi and some of the other boys who are also sugar babies are Bi. There is no MxM but there is mentions of it occasionally….as well as some harmless ot7 flirting! Also all of the boys are introed, Tae and Joon just play a lager part here!

_______________________________________________

I guess, fuck where do we even start? Maybe, will go back to where it all technically started, which was the last time things felt...somewhat normal yeah?

So, that would be...hmm...about 2 weeks shy of you heading into Junior year at USC right? The day your boys picked you up at the airport, and the three of your treated Blue, aka TaeTae to brunch!?

Well, wait let’s back track a little it all started much eariler than that, because you weren’t even aware of your brunch plans until later in the day. So Initially the day in question kicks of with you, in oversized blacked out CHLOE shades, hungover as fuck, sat in at the airport one Sunday afternoon. Smack dab in the middle of Terminal 6, in a bar called Blu2o sipping on a Bloody Mary, scrolling aimlessly through Snapchat. While simotaniously being told for the very first time ...that you’ll be attending a “Haute Couture” themed charity auction...on Tuesday! Yup, the day after tomorrow! Thank god he can’t see your damn face right now, biting down on your straw to muzzle yourself!

“No, babe it’s fine, I’ll just hit Rodeo tomorrow morning, and I’m sure my nail and lash girl can fit me-Oh you...haven’t gotten... what ...your wearing either?” Parroting the words back In slow motion as if it would make the words sound better or something!

Oh for fucks sake! Bringing your forehead flush to the marble bartop already feeling a full blown migraine brewing at the nape of your neck. Giving yourself a couple moments to self compose, this man is so damn unorganized it’s unfucking real. His personal assistant better be the 2nd highest paid person within his entire company because…..This is far from new, I don’t even know why your suprised and I’d say you don’t get paid enough for this....but ya do! So you suck it up, lose the attitude and slip right into your “Yes sir” or maybe I should say ‘Yes daddy” voice.

“Don’t worry about it, I know your busy. I totally get it, your a 28 waist right? Of course, I remember...I remember everything you tell me….Ohhh your gonna let me put you in color too???” Eyes flickering up to the notification from your bank, noting a cute little 12k wire pending.

“Yeah, no, I see it, that should be good. I was thinking Versace or Cavili for you anyway...they have good prints to fit the theme, and if all else fails I have my card too…yup..just landed about..hmm... 30 minutes ago actually. Of course, stop apologizing, Sunday's are always your golf days, I get it, hey, tell the guys I said hi and enjoy your day. Text me later if you feel up to it..k....bye..”

Were you actually getting a little flustered there towards the end? It's the slight accent, isn't it? Honestly, it didn't take much for you to slip into “character” with him, even after barely being together a full month. For one he wasn’t an asshole, had a decent sense of humor, and he’s really fuckin hot...however there was one, little, well shit, not so little issue...you noticed while with him recently. Which, then sparked quite a few questions while also answering some that had been rattling through your head since the day you met. But will circle back to the fact that you spent a week on vacation with a man, while dressed in some of the sexiest pieces of 2019 couture! Yet..you barely got touched once outside of a couple chaste kisses and hand-holding while at the two fashion shows you attended together… so, yeah, yeah!

A low groan in frustration rattled from your throat as you continued scrolling through Snapchat, trying to come up with some possible outfit scenarios in your head! It’s kinda funny, how mynute all of that seems now though, how your definition of “Stress” that day was you trying to decide if your sugar daddy was gay, while also finding time to fit in a self-care day, shopping, and getting your books for school!! The fact that, that was what you considered migraine worthy, fuck, what you wouldn’t give to consider multitasking your only maltitude of “stress” again …..

Just in your own little world, mind swirling with a couple of stylists you’ve met along the way, considering the idea of them pulling some vintage pieces for you instead! What you should be doing, is scrolling through your contact list and texting said stylists, instead you find yourself more and more distracted. Getting lost in the mounds of snap updates from Jimin as he “modestly” sunbathed in a private villa in Italy. Then later sharing a glimpse into his shopping spree from Versace, no doubt a good 20k worth of Italian luxury spread out along the plush white sheets. Sending him a cheeky little “That’s my boy” with a couple of smug winky faces in response!

It’s still kinda crazy to think, things like that are considered normal within your world now, the fact that you aren’t even surprised at the number of gifts. Or, simply the fact that your barley 21-year-old best friend is sunbathing in Italy on someone else’s dime. Then again, you just got sent 12 thousand dollars to spend on an event that would last maybe all of 5 hours, while sitting next to a stack of Louis Vuittion luggage from your first class flight in from Vegas, technically. Opting to land there first after a long 15-hour flight, checking in at The Four Seasons for not even a solid 24 hours before coming home! Honestly?There was no real reason for the pit stop except it gave you an excuse to see a friend while also allowing you to unwind in one of your favorite hotels!

That sentence alone is actually absurd when you really think about it, the idea of you casually booking flights and suites in 5-star hotels as if you’re ordering off the damn dollar menu at Mcdonalds! You, the girl that was working two jobs at the Groove and mourning a piece of shit cheating ex boyfriend her freshman year of college.....is now reminiscing about catching flights to chill with friends and last minute finding dresses for Couture themed galas.Like, what the actual fuck is life.... Oh my bad, life at the moment is constantly being paranoid that you and your friends will get arrested! Life in this moment however...was a fucking perfect!

The friend you where meeting in Vegas was Hoseok by the way, the redhead was currently vacationing in Sin City for the next couple of days, typically residing in LA as well. Just Chillin’ before the semester starts, living his best life, which revolves around “OFF-WHITE'' shopping sprees, private dance lessons, and constantly taking thirst trap pics for his 10’s of thousands of followers online. He randomly texts you saying “I miss your face” you text him saying “I land at 8 tonight bring a bottle and sushi to room 605 at The Four Seasons hotel '' Simple!

Your initial flight, the one that was 15 hours, was originally from Paris, where you spent the last week or so with Jeong-su, being arm candy, sipping wine, sightseeing and of course shopping!. Barley 32 hours ago your Snapchat looked pretty damn similar, if not worse in comparison to Jimin’s but what can I say, you can’t be in the home of Givenchy and Gaulthier and not go to Givenchy and Gaultier!

What your life is, what you and your friends do, I mean, I think it’s safe to say it’s pretty self-explanatory yeah? The average 20 something-year-old in college isn't flying themselves out of the country or going luxury shopping without a little help. In your case, it’s typically thanks to a person you commonly refer to as “Daddy” now, the context behind the word however….is where you and your friends may differ from others…..

But that’s your business, your concern and more importantly your choice, and honestly for a while life seemed too damn good to be true...I guess looking back on it now, I guess that’s because it kinda was!

Sat at the predominantly empty bar alone, more than content by the silence, twirling your straw between your lips, as you scanned back over the shit show that was your schedule for the semester! Getting more of a migraine from that, then shopping or even the fact that you're still hungover and drinking on an empty stomach at half-past 12. Shooting a quick text to your redheaded best friend cursing him out for getting you drunk off your ass on a bottle of Yamazaki 12.

“Can I get anything else for you beautiful? Another drink or maybe an appetizer? We have damn good loaded queso fries if I do say so myself!” Waving the menu in your face playfully, the warm, inviting voice in front of you was the bartender, who’s had his eye on you since you swayed in. Even if you looked like crap for your standards you knew to most you were the farthest thing from it as you swayed into the bar like you owned the place. In your heels, and tiny little black dress, while an airport assistant trolied in your luggage behind you! Ohhh Blair Waldorf would without a doubt be proud!

“Mmmm…” Lips pursed in a slight pout as you raked over the menu, honestly, you were hungry and they have bomb ass fried pickles…..”Actually, yeah, I’ll get-”

“ 3 tall shots of whatever top-shelf Tequila you have, also add whatever she’s been drinking to my tab, along with an order of fried pickles with extra ranch…please and thank you!” Smoothly sliding his black card, and ID across the marble bartop for review.

Oh.

The look on the bartender’s face was fucking priceless, torn between shitting himself and maybe….nah, just straight shitting himself! Skin flushed, the sense of panic was clear as day, wondering if he’d overstepped that fine line between customer service and filtration. Considering whoever the person behind you is, clearly knows you well enough to know your food order. A forced bashful smile playing along his lips as he bowed out in acknowledgment, sliding the gentelmen back is ID and whispering out a faint “Yes sir, coming right up…”

The base vibrating through your ears instantly had you readjusting your posture, a strong tingle running down your spine, back arching ever so slightly. A playful smirk playing along your lips as you slowly laced your tongue back around your staw, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

“You sure you wanna do that? My tastes are pretty expensive..” Tone blatantly flirtatious, yet you still hadn’t bothered to even turn around, that’s when suddenly you hear a deep arrogant chuckle rumbling low in his chest. Only...this sounds a little brighter? And like it’s coming from your left instead of behind you…

“Mmm, I’m sure we can handle it baby….”

You could feel the air shift behind you, it felt warmer, and there was a strong mix of scents flooding through your nose. Leaning back in your seat, pleasantly finding your shoulders, the back of your neck, and your head, cradled against a lean wall of silk. Sighing contently, naturally letting your body melt into his frame, nose running into your face as you smiled so hard your cheeks hurt. That’s when a gangle of veiny, porcelain limbs wrapped around your shoulders pulling you even tighter against him, only to find brown, sharp, cat-like eyes staring down at you, though a pair of translucent designer shades. Seemingly a little bit amused at how excited you are to see him. Long dark wavy locks falling messily into his face, a tiny silver hoop dawning his button nose. Tongue playing at the corner of his mouth, letting the tiny silver ball slip between his lips. This angle lets you really appreciate how sharp, yet soft his features were, an oxymoron that honestly makes no damn sense unless you see him in person….jawline sharp enough to cut glass yet he has the cutest cheeks ever when he smiles. It honestly makes no sense whatsoever and he’s one of the many reasons you have trust issues. Well, that and your line of work, considering the number of men you find out are married and still try and sneak around with you.

Then, as if to just make his presence known, there’s another pair of hands making their home along your body, gently squeezing your thigh. Except, he’s polar opposite to the person I just described, the man behind you is your roommate Yoongi, the man who just took a seat to your left, is your other roommate Namjoon! First off, he’s tall as all hell, and an offensively perfect shade of brown, he can’t even go into the burbs without being asked what self-tanner he uses. In which he smugly replies “Genetics” letting them sit there and try and google said company that makes that brand of self-tan. Streams of meticulously placed colored neo-traditional tattoos paint his skin, accompanied by deep dimples, and bleach blonde hair styled into an undercut, sides buzzed into the perfect fade.

“So you gonna get up and give me a real hug or what???” Placing a kiss in your hair as he pulled back, giving you room to hop out of your seat and right into his arms.

The Full thing is coming soon, this is from summer 2019, I just have to edit, and reread the full thing again! I also wrote the first 3 parts all at once..sooo if your exicted show this some love anddddddddd come let me know!

Love you as always,

Rocki

#Yoongi #yoongi smut #yoongi au #yoongi x reader #namjoon #namjoon au #taehyung #taehyung au #bts au fic #bts au #bts smut #kpop smut kpop au #kpop au #min yoongi

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fourangers · 5 years ago

Text

Some bad porn can turn out to be good (2/3)

Summary: “Why are you watching porn on broad daylight and…is this…is this a blond guy fucking a japanese man?”

Who would have thought that porn watching could have such enlightening results. NaruSasu, blow job, anal sex, mutual pining without angst, Comedy, Romance, AU working in an advertisement agency. Some InoSaku.

AO3 link | ffnet link

Chapter 1

AN: We might probably get bunch of technical terms inside advertisement agencies since I’m taking advantage that I work in this field ayyy. It won’t take too long. Why did I write an AU related to my work? Errrr…'cuz I'm too lazy to research a job I'm not familiar with? Hohoho . This chapter there’s blow job.

⏤.⏤

“We’re going to enter a competition.”

Everyone managed to keep a poker face, even though they were groaning inside.

The CEO of the agency continued his speech. "It's going to be tough, but I swear if we win it's going to be very worthwhile. The client wants to make an annual campaign, aiming to boost the sales by giving prizes to their clients.”

“So it's the usual being part of a club, earning points that converts to goodies thing.” Sasuke muttered.

“Yes…but they also want to use this opportunity to expand their sales to other states. South and South-west is already guaranteed that most grocery stores have their products, so they want to concentrate on Center states, North and North-east. That means they are willing to spend about 1 billion to any ad agency that will get this case. The presentation is scheduled on the next month, where we need to showcase the whole yearly strategy, alongside the Key Visuals within each season and a spreadsheet about budget planning.”

This time all the workers grimaced in varying degrees of expression.

Shikamaru raised his hand in question. “So is the whole agency going to concentrate in developing this whole campaign on those following weeks?”

The managers in each sector glanced at each other before the Creative Director explained. “We will, but not entirely. We’ll organize planning, brainstorming fitting with producer analysts. Meanwhile, our art directors will be focusing delivering the daily jobs with our steady clients. When it’s your time to design everything, we already talked with our account managers who will ask for a longer deadline for more meaningless things, other jobs we will hire some freelancers to take care of it. Of course, there’ll be some that will require your direct attention and/or need to be sent daily like social media posts. There will be some days you’ll work overtime.”

The CEO hurried to add. “But we’ll pay the dinner, taxis and everything, and you guys can ask for some days off after that. You’ll have to negotiate with your respective leaders. Like I’ve said, I promise all that this is worth it, if we secure this campaign we won’t have any financial issue this whole year. If we win, I vouch that by the end of the year I’ll pay everyone a trip to Las Vegas all-included for a week.”

That caught everyone’s attention, with good bunch of people clapped and some hoot called.

Encouraged by his workers’ cheers, the CEO continued. “Also, on that day when they announce that we won, we’ll just drop the pen. No more work that day, everyone can go home and relax or join us to celebrate in a bar. So is everybody in?” Most enthusiastic employees and younger people shouted with excitement. “Good! So let’s get this started! Your management will explain more with details ok?”

“Alright.” Their Creative Director mumbled once all the team were in a room. “We’re still in the process to properly accommodate this whole mess honestly, so I have some bad news. Every art director needs to deliver the primary main Key Visual by the end of this week.” Naruto groaned, with other mumbled protests and grunts coming from his fellow coworkers. “And I’m going to keep things exciting here. This time I’m going to sort with a new AD/copywriter/planner team, to make the ideas fresher. First copywriters come forth and write your name here and put in the box, where I’ll select randomly with which planner you’ll be paired with. Then ADs will do the same and we’ll form the trio.”

This situation was all kinds of boring; Sasuke thought to himself, but his heart skipped a beat once he glimpsed blue eyes standing out of the crowd while he folded his piece of paper. His streak of good luck couldn’t possibly stretch this far, right, he’d be probably asking for too much at this point of the story.

“Last team will be…Sakura as planner, Sasuke as the copywriter and Naruto as the AD.”

Thank God in Heaven.

“HmmmMmmmmmMMmmm, well well well.” Sakura approached Sasuke, beaming widely as they both watched the blond man from afar. “I guess it’s about time you should restock your lube and some condoms, right?”

“Sakura.” Sasuke warned her, when Naruto noticed them and waved his hand, they waved back.

“What? ‘M just sayin’, you know, just sayin’...”

“Sakura, your weak attempts of gangster lingo is appalling, I advise you to keep your opinions to yourself and do not try to make any innuendos regarding me and Naruto. Knowing that dumbass, I’m pretty sure it’s going to backfire.”

“Hmm…okay, point taken.” She agreed begrudgingly, while they walked to pick the briefing. Naruto was already reading the content, and curled his lips upwards.

“Hey guys! It’s been a while since I worked with y’all right? I’m sure it’s gonna be great.”

Sakura nodded and smiled back. “So…what kind of KV you need to create now? Hopefully nothing too crazy.”

“Yeah, it’s not that bad.” Naruto sighed. “We have to create the main one that provides enough visual explanation about the campaign but since it’s annual, there’ll be secondary thematic KVs like Christmas, Black Friday, Easter and so on. So it has to have enough personality, but not that much so it’s customizable. That’s the whole trick.”

Sakura grimaced. “That sounds tough.”

“Right, by the way, now that I just heard Naruto…” The creative director chimed in. “No one is going to get extra brownie points if your KV is chosen, you’ll all send to me and people will vote solely according to their preferences, they won’t know who designed it.”

Naruto turned around, throwing a significant glance. “We’re gonna win this, obviously.”

Sasuke snorted. “Obviously.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “Alright, the first KV is up to you two, meanwhile I’ll do some research about the client and this campaign, and share through e-mail.”

“Alright cool, thanks for the help.” Naruto grinned. “I mean, ignoring all the chaos we’ll face in the next few weeks, I’m excited to be working with you guys! We won pretty cool competitions together right.”

Sasuke was excited too, but for entirely different reasons. He noticed Sakura staring towards him with a knowing smile.

She said. “I’m looking forward to work with you too. Well, I got to go now.” She patted Sasuke’s back, messing with Naruto’s hair before she went away.

“Maybe we should re-read the briefing, see if there’s any info that will help us out.” Sasuke slid smoothly next to Naruto till their shoulders touched, vision focused on the piece of paper the blond man was holding, getting so close Sasuke could feel the steady breathing on his face.

Sasuke focused his gaze back to Naruto, noticing the raised eyebrows. Naruto muttered. “Ok sure, let me read it outloud for you. And then, I guess I’ll search for some references for inspiration then.”

Sasuke had less than half his mind to really listening with whatever Naruto was reciting, his entire attention aimed to see if the art director recoiled or showed any discomfort towards his close proximity. He actually appeared to be further relaxed instead, and this undoubtedly counted as a positive sign. Sasuke had been growing even closer to him in those latest days, but no matter how much he tried to imply he wanted to be included in Naruto’s possible dating pool, that dumbass was oblivious to it all.

He’s going to use this rare chance to make his point across, since his subtle signals went unnoticed.

Soon they finished brainstorming, Naruto groaned as they went back to their station. “Man, I just hope we won’t overwork too much. And if we win this account, I hope that the client is easier to swallow than most.”

Sasuke smirked. “All clients are hard to swallow. Just some gives you a different first impression once they were gliding through your throat.”

Naruto halted on his steps stupefied and retorted. “I can’t believe that an uptight asshole like you is spouting a dirty innuendo at any time you can get nowadays.”

“I see no problem doing so, now that we share a common interest.” He said in a monotone voice.

Naruto studied Sasuke for a while, before he shook his head and snorted. “You’re one of a kind, man.”

⏤.⏤.⏤

“Well! Now that we received all the material, as well as the chosen KV, let’s get started with our own work.”

“I guess…”

“Hn.”

“I’m excited to see all our ideas come together and trade some back and forth.”

“Hm…”

“Yeah…”

Sakura rolled her eyes and continued. “...anyways, I made a rough sketch about our part of the project, but it's nice having this brainstorm so we can come up with cool ideas so I can refine my planning.”

Naruto whined. “...man, I'm not looking forward opening Shika's psd file. He doesn't name his layers, doesn't organize into folders and for some crazy reason he knows how to find it himself. Honestly it's easier to find a needle in a haystack than navigate through his KV.”

“I still can't believe that he won this round. I mean, it's visually appealing for sure, but ours were good too.” Sasuke muttered. “Well, Temari is this client’s account manager so it's quite understandable. That man can create wonders for his girlfriend.”

“Yeah…bet that she promised one night of kinky sex and Shika is ready to move mountains for her. For a lazy guy like him, that's pretty impressive.”

“Agreed.”

Sakura stared in deadpan and sighed. “Alright boys, will you quit being such sore losers and focus on the job for a second?”

Naruto threw his head to the back with a sigh and Sasuke sniffed imperiously.

“Alright, since we’re responsible with the summer campaign part, I already searched some marketing activations done on beaches, as well as some we could do on music festivals.” She said.

“I already have some sketches in mind to the KV, but roughly it’ll be a lot of orange and blue colors. They are always a good contrast.”

“Noted, I’ll write some slogans with this in mind.” Sasuke said. “Oh, by the way, have you heard from Temari that they are asking around if a celebrity is interested to endorse our campaign?”

“Yeah, she told me that!” Naruto exclaimed. “At least they are going to hire some celebrity to substitute the guy in Shika’s KV, and I’m so glad ‘cuz that guy was like...super fucking pale.”

Sasuke opened the aforementioned picture on his laptop and mumbled, furrowing his eyebrows. “He doesn’t look that bad.”

Naruto craned his neck closer to him, switching between looking at Sasuke and the man in the KV and widened a mischievous grin. “Yeah, you’re right…he appeared that he actually saw the sun at least once in his life…unlike you.”

“Excuse me. I assure you that I fit in the criteria just as well as he would.” He rebutted, lifting his chin.

“What?!” Naruto guffawed. “You look like you never went to the beach once!”

“I do have indeed, I just take good care of my skin. Aesthetically speaking, I could be an excellent choice to represent this campaign.”

Naruto rolled his eyes. “You’re so fucking full of yourself. Yeah yeah yeah, we all know you’re a pretty boy, what else is new.”

“That while I may be a good choice, I’m sure you, instead, is on the other side of spectrum.”

“Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat⏤!!” Naruto protested. “I’m the perfect embodiment of summer, you asshole!”

“You sure? I mean, you always wear baggy clothes.” Sasuke smirked. “Maybe it’s to hide some beer belly under your t-shirt.”

The blond man abruptly stood up from his seat and yanked his t-shirt upward to show his lean, sun-kissed stomach. Sasuke managed to mask his total interest by resting his chin on his palm with a languid raise of an eyebrow. “See?! Feast your eyes with my sexy self!”

“I’m supposed to be amazed by this? I mean…I think I can see some belly fat over there.”

“That’s my six pack, that’s what I have you bastard! My abdomen is 100% sturdy muscle. You can touch it if you want.”

Don’t mind if I do. “Since you insist.” Sasuke uttered in the most bored tone he could muster. Licking his lips, he raised his hand, feeling the silky warmth once he brushed over the tanned skin. He noticed how it twitched under his fingertips, giving a rush of excitement through his veins. “I’m not entirely convinced, it feels pudgy to be true.”

“Pudg⏤you’re not doing it right, you should touch here, bastard.” Naruto grabbed his wrist to let his hand have full contact on the taut stomach, sinewy muscles and all. “See?”

“Ah...yes. I guess I do. Maybe.” Sasuke kept the airy voice, even if he was sliding down to each bump of Naruto’s abs, fingers skimming through the belly button. “I guess you did prove me wrong.”

“I did, right? Told you I was right.” Naruto grinned, puffing his chest.

“Hm.” His thumb caressed languidly his belly, graphite eyes zeroed onto blue ones. Naruto’s victorious beam faltered noticing Sasuke’s heated gaze, staring back with a little bit of hesitancy.

Sakura was torn between being amused and exasperated while she observed the unfolding situation. Dear Lord, it was almost like they had forgotten she’s in the room, wasn’t it? No wait, they probably were aware of her presence, since Sasuke had the look that he’d tear Naruto’s t-shirt apart if only she wasn’t there right now. She cleared her throat.

“Alright Naruto, now that you had your fun letting Sasuke grope all over your body, can we go back to the brainstorm we were having?”

Jumping startled, Naruto dropped his t-shirt in an instant looking exactly like a deer caught in the headlights. Sasuke however, glared at her for the unwanted interruption. Sakura smiled. They just make it so easy for her to tease.

Soon they focused on the task at hand, right on time when Naruto’s stomach started growling in protest.

“I guess that’s it for now, my boys. Ino and I are thinking about going to a restaurant close by. You want to tag along?”

“Thanks for the invite, but I brought my lunch box.”

“Hm, yeah! Me too, sorry ‘bout that Sakura. Next time for sure.”

“Sure Naruto! Next time.” Sakura threw a side glance towards Sasuke, a lopsided grin broadening on her lips. Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

“Please don’t tell me you’re eating Ramen Cup again.” Sasuke grumbled, while they were walking to the cafeteria.

“My dad actually nagged me about it, so I’m eating something else this time.” Naruto sighed. “Wow, I guess everyone already ate their lunch, this place is so empty.”

“This is not a bad thing, we won’t have to wait in line to heat the food in the microwave.”

Naruto perked up. “You’re right! We’ll be able to eat calmly and slowly.”

“Sure, and if we have enough free time, we could watch some porn together.”

Naruto rolled his eyes and grinned. “Yeah, doesn’t sound bad, we can even do some good ol’ hand jobs to each other while we watch, what do you think?”

“Not a bad idea, where do I sign up?”

Naruto swallowed dryly, shifting his gaze sideways to hide Sasuke’s piercing eyes. Rubbing the back of his neck, he chuckled. “You know, sometimes I really don’t get if you’re joking or talking seriously.”

Sasuke let his hand glide through the tanned arm. “Take off your pants and we’ll see.”

Naruto slacked his mouth, staring flabbergasted. “Yeah sure, let’s just skip lunch and do it right now.” When he witnessed the eager face Sasuke was making, he scoffed. “I’m kidding, you crazy bastard. C’mon, let’s get to eat ‘cuz I’m really fucking hungy I could eat a whole cow.”

Frowning, Sasuke obeyed nevertheless.

⏤.⏤.⏤.⏤

The drumming on fingers on the table followed the constant buzz of the coffee machine, stopping once it was done. He picked his mug, inhaling the nice fragrance and sighing while he went to his seat. Sipping in long, paused gulps, he observed blue eyes focused on the task at hand. His hand rested on Naruto’s thigh, but the latter didn’t show any significant reaction, either he was too busy to notice or he didn’t mind such close touch.

Sasuke inclined his whole body towards Naruto, his mouth settling inches from his ear. “Need any help?”

Naruto stiffened for a second, before dropping his shoulders. “Hm, yeah, actually…if it’s not too much, can you change your text with shorter words? So it’ll be easier to organize the blocks of text and make it more aesthetically pleasing.”

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, but nodded nevertheless. Throughout this entire week where they were all huddled together, he made sure he used the most blatant flirting in his arsenal but even if Naruto recognized it (which is somewhat a showcase of evolution), he appeared to rebuff most of them.

Sitting on the table in front of them, Sakura typed non-stop, occasionally peeking on their interaction. This was so much more entertaining than those sugary drama series she and Ino would binge watch at night. If it depended on Sasuke, he would sit on Naruto’s lap and ride him all week, and he was very determined to reach this goal. She’d pity him if this appeared to be a lost cause, but she definitely noticed Naruto seldom glancing Sasuke’s back when he thought no one would see, eyes locked with a ferocious hunger adorning on his face, before returning to hide behind the monitor in haste.

Yep. Very entertaining.

However, this was probably the 4th or 5th night (or maybe more, they lost count) they stayed extra hours working on this project and their brains were already screaming for help. Sakura was yawning non-stop, Naruto was rubbing his eyes while he was erasing some background with his tablet, and even if Sasuke was the most resilient of the trio, he realized that he was rewriting his texts more than the usual.

“Naruto⏤” Sakura called, the blond AD grunted in response. “I’m done writing the marketing strategies. How much have you done so you can send me some layouts?”

Naruto dropped the pen, scratching his head. “Honestly, I think I’m going to take a while. I’m staring at the same shit for about an hour, and there’s still tons of other things to do on the list. I’m gonna wash my face, chug more coffee till I’m awake enough to do anything.”

“Alright, that does sound pretty ominous. I guess⏤” She stretched her arms and yawned. “I’m exhausted and I don’t think I’ll be much of a help staying any longer. Do you mind if I go home now?”

Both young men shook their heads and Naruto added. “Sure, you look pretty tired.”

“I’ll arrive early tomorrow to put everything you’ll do tonight. Just remember to put on the server before you go. And once you’re done, you two better rest well ok. I’ll talk to our boss that you were up all night and you’ll arrive late tomorrow.” She picked her purse and smiled. “Well, I’m out. You boys better behave!” She said as she threw a significant glance towards Sasuke, and went on her way.

Naruto was still had his hands busy adjusting the picture, so he muttered. “So. You’re almost done too?”

“Yes, I already send you the e-mail. But I’m going to stay until you’ve finished.”

“Oh cool, great. Actually, I’m happy you’re staying the night.” Sasuke widened his eyes, though Naruto grinned playfully. “In case I need your help to tweak other things.”

Sasuke scoffed. “Well, I have to be here in case I need to fix your screw ups.”

“You never waste an opportunity to be a bastard, do you.”

“Well, you like it. Anyways…” Sasuke sat on a chair next to the blond man, their legs bumping to each other. “Let’s check if the new text helps you out.”

“Hm.” Naruto opened the document and began changing each layout, seemingly unbothered by the close proximity. After a while, the blond man could feel eyes practically boring holes through his gaze, and he shifted around his seat. "Jesus man, do you ever blink?!"

"I'm bored." Was his nonplussed answer.

"Then go check your facebook, instagram, whatever."

"Not interested." Sasuke recited with the same droned tone.

"Check the news, go piss off some Trump supporters on the comments session."

"I've already exhausted all the latest feed."

"Well then…" Naruto shrugged. "You tried Buzzfeed?"

Sasuke gave him a look.

"What?"

Sasuke sighed, picking up his notebook. "Alright, I better let you concentrate on your task or we will work till sunrise." He smirked. "I could take a page of your book and watch porn."

Naruto laughed. “Please don’t.”

“...why?”

Because I’ll get hard if I see you jerking off. “Because reasons.” Naruto muttered.

“How eloquent.” Sasuke snorted. “Is the sight of a man masturbating such a turn off to you?”

“What? You know I like guys, why are you even asking this question?”

Just making sure. “So your problem surrounds exclusively to me then.”

Naruto almost bit his tongue, coughing. “No⏤no, no no no. I mean⏤” He coughed again, making an incredulous face. “Whaaaaat⏤noooo, where did you get this idea??”

Sasuke widened his smirk. “You didn’t give me valid explanations, so I have to make some assumptions on my own.”

“Yeah yeah well, you’re wrong, it’s really not what you’re thinking, you arrogant bastard.” Naruto grumbled.

“Hm. So you’re not even a little bit interested seeing then?”

Tilting his head to one side, Naruto said. “Seeing what?”

Sasuke didn’t answer his query, opting to type a very recognizable gay porn website, while he widened his legs.

Naruto’s jaw dropped. “No, hey. Don’t do that⏤we gotta, I gotta concentrate ya know.”

Smirking, Sasuke noted the slight panic in his voice. “So I do distract you.”

“Anyone would be distracted with porn nearby, that has nothing to do with you.”

“Oh? So you wouldn’t mind if I do this…” Sasuke adjusted on his seat, fingers sliding his shirt upwards.

Swallowing dryly, Naruto still managed to roll his eyes. “No, you look ridiculous and I really need to finish designing those pieces.”

Sasuke ignored him, clicking some random video and skipped directly to the good part. Naruto jumped from his seat when he heard a long moan, and threw a dirty glare despite receiving a nonchalant response in return.

“Really? Really?” Naruto groaned, placing his headphones on his ears and putting the loudest music possible. “Some people are actually trying to work over here, ya know!”

Sasuke picked his laptop, tilting it so the screen wouldn’t be facing the blond man. In this brief period of silence, he concentrated in moving an object in Photoshop, till he caught some movement on the corner of his eye. The dark blue shirt was yanked up, completely exposing Sasuke’s lean stomach. He reached the button of pants, opening and dragged the zipper down in an unhurried pace. Naruto drank on the sight of the dark grey boxers, noting all the shadows and bumps beneath it, revealing what was definitely a rather impressive size. Pale fingers glided over the smooth fabric, and Naruto just couldn’t tear this image away from his eyes. He licked his parched lips when Sasuke kept palming on his boxers, though it took to a sudden halt. Naruto almost bemoaned outloud until he realized that Sasuke was staring back at him with quirked lips.

Sasuke flicked one side of Naruto’s headphones, whispering. “Enjoying the show?”

Scowling, he hunched his shoulders. “Do you enjoy being such a exhibitionist bastard?”

“In most occasions, no, not really.” Putting his arm around Naruto’s chair, Sasuke closed in. “Only to few selected people I’m interested in.”

Sasuke studied how blue eyes widened vividly, mouth slack though they didn’t break the gaze trained to each other. Naruto appeared to fall in realization, hastily turning his head to look on his monitor. Sasuke’s fingers reached to the tips of blond hair, tucking it behind the ear before he cupped the tanned cheek, succeeding to let Naruto’s vision trail back towards him. He was getting so close, he could feel the heat emanating from the bronzed skin. When blue eyes were half-lidded, with heartbeats racing, he also shut his own eyes.

Naruto let out a very wide, epic and loud yawn.

“Oh shit. I’m so sorry. I⏤” Naruto yawned again. “I’m so fucking tired man, I swear. Sorry ‘bout that.”

Since the whole mood had evaporated to thin air, Sasuke released his face at once, going back to his seat and zipped his pants. “It’s okay. It’s already over 10 after all.”

“Yeah, I’m beyond exhausted. There’s not a lot of things left to do though, it won’t take too much of our time.”

“Fine.” Sasuke grumbled, in his usual monotone voice. “I’ll stop bothering you then.”

Naruto scratched his head, unable to come up with anything to disperse the dark cloud looming on Sasuke’s head. He returned to his task, a quiet air settle between them with the occasional help coming from the brunet copywriter.

“Alright, finally! It’s the last layout I’m doing today.” Naruto stretched his arms, groaning. “I still need to put all the images in the system, it’s going to take a while.”

Sasuke picked his smartphone, standing up. “I’m going downstairs for a quick smoke then, before it’s all done.”

“Yeah sure! Thanks a lot Sasuke.” Naruto beamed, with an acknowledging nod in return. Once the dark-haired man was out of his sight, he released a loud sigh. Thank God for his baggy pants.

Okay, now he gotta go to the bathroom fast. Sasuke usually spent long minutes for his cigarette break, so he better seize this opportunity well.

⏤.⏤

Sasuke inhaled a puff a smoke, glaring at the fallen ashes. Tonight all signs pointed out that he didn’t have any possible chance being involved with Naruto. Maybe it’s time for him to start giving up, even in the most blatant flirting that dumbass just yawned back at him.

Growling, his foot crushed the half-used cigarette to the ground, his bad mood escalating. He hated the idea of having to step down, but he also didn’t want to push his feelings if Naruto was uncomfortable.

This sucked. Sasuke sighed, walking back to the entrance. He couldn’t wait for this night to be over so he could just go back to his apartment and drink his sorrows away, or something like that. Anything to forget the twisting pain wrenching his heart.

However, once he was back to the ad agency, he noticed that Naruto wasn’t on his seat. He shrugged, walking towards the bathroom. Maybe he’d see the blond man drinking the twelfth cup of coffee in a row, rocking his body back and forth, he’d probably fall asleep while standing. The thought of this made him chuckle a little.

The kitchen was also empty. Sasuke resumed his steps towards the bathroom until he froze on the spot.

He heard a moan.

The pitch of the moan was very recognizable as well. And considering they were the only people left in this entire building and the voice was so deliciously familiar, Sasuke remained standing still, listening to the pleased grunts as it grew in cadence. He almost wanted to scream in frustration. This idiot just couldn't wait for a more appropriate time to do his business, could he? Now Sasuke was sure those moans will plague his dreams for the next few months for sure.

"Ah…" Naruto groaned in a way that shot straight to his groin. Sasuke bumped his head on the door, this dumbass was driving him insane. He better go away. “Ahnnngh⏤” Right fucking now. “Ah⏤Sa…”

“Sasuke…”

He did a double-take, shaking his head. He’s hallucinating, he must be. He probably had been wanting Naruto for so long that he’s hearing the craziest things.

“Ah yes⏤!” His echo brought shivers down Sasuke’s spine, chanting once again. “Sasuke⏤”

He barely registered himself banging the door open, brain gone haywire as he strode in fast steps to the half open stall. He heard Naruto’s panicked grunt, trying to close the door stall but he was faster, prying it open with a wicked smirk.

“Why, hello there. What do we have here?” Sasuke murmured, noting the flushed face, chest heaving heavily and even if the blond man was trying his hardest to cover it, he saw the thick cock jutting out of the denim pants. Sasuke licked his lips.

“Sasuke!! The fuck, you can’t⏤” Naruto still attempted to shut the door but Sasuke used his whole elbow to keep it open, quirking that infuriating sexy smirk of his. “You can’t just barge in like that! Get out!”

“Trust me, usually I wouldn’t bother myself snooping over anyone’s private moments but you called my name. And naturally, I just responded to such call.”

Sasuke saw Naruto clenching his jaw, though didn’t come up with any word of denial. His hard-on was still nestling in the midst of blond curls, so he succumbed the desire to touch it, tip of fingers flickering on the slit and earning a moan from Naruto.

“It looks like you’re in need of my help too.” He gradually let his hand wrap around Naruto’s cock, but only let it graze over it. “In any case you’re interested.”

Naruto hissed when Sasuke gripped his cock tightly, before releasing it at once. Sasuke was gradually lowering himself, with one knee to the ground. He kept teasing him with fluttering touches, brushing through the length and crumbling any remaining resistance. He wanted Sasuke for so long…and why is this bastard so irresistible?

“Well?” Sasuke caressed his inner thighs. “I won’t know if you won’t tell me anything dumbass.” He let out a hot puff of air over the sensitive head. “Naruto?”

Unsatisfied from the lack of response, Sasuke stood up. Sturdy hands seized his hair all of a sudden, growling close to his ear. “You better get there before I fucking lose my mind.”

Smirking undaunted, he continued to widen the distance despite seeing the incredulous blue eyes. He felt a grip on his nape, pushing him down even if he exerted some strength against it. His mouth was practically touching the head of Naruto’s cock, so he licked the beaded pre-cum, revelling the lustful gaze. The hand clenched around his hair when he sucked the sensitive glan, thrusting inside his mouth a few times before he glided it in.

Naruto tossed his head to the back, moaning. With one hand encasing the base, Sasuke’s tongue curled around the joint between the head and the shaft, slurping and encasing with his lips. How sexually gratifying this felt, with each suckle and light bite, Naruto would groan, hiss and curse loudly, crying out in dark pleasure. Their eyes locked together, Sasuke would swallow the cock, staring how those cerulean hue darkened in hunger. That hand was still holding his head in place, tightening in a vice grip and made him moan with his mouth stuffed around that hot flesh.

Without a sign of warning, Naruto shoved till his cock went deep through Sasuke’s throat. Sasuke didn’t deter him, just threw a defiant glance back. With his hand clutching the black strands of hair, he thrust his cock in Sasuke’s mouth over and over, the grip on his scalp with the salty flavor of skin blended in this spicy mixture of pain and pleasure.

His senses were already being overwhelmed by a musky scent, signalizing that Naruto was getting close. He released the cock from his mouth, stroking till one spurt of cum reached his face, bursting and flowing on his hand. Naruto was still heaving heavily, so Sasuke cleaned the best he could, tucking the flacid dick back to the orange boxers. He patted the tanned cheek, whispering close to the ear. “You want to continue somewhere else? My apartment is pretty close by.”

These sentences were enough to sober Naruto up, as he stared back with uncertainty and longing, before his eyebrows knitted in blazing determination. Feeling a little rattled about this sudden shift of emotions, Sasuke opened his mouth to question until arms enveloped around him, lips silencing him with a kiss.

Whatever was inside his mind just evaporated as Sasuke responded immediately, lips gliding and matching in a wet lock, his own hands reaching to hold Naruto’s waist. Soon his tongue slipped in, drinking the pleasurable grunt, consuming him, pulling him even closer. Sasuke inhaled sharply when their mouths parted for a second, coming together in increased intensity while Naruto embraced him tenderly, almost possessively.

Both men paused to catch their breaths, staring longingly to each other. Sasuke was acutely aware of warm fingers caressing his back, while his own hands wound up brushing Naruto’s cheeks. Blue eyes crinkled soft and open, approaching in an almost lethargic way, with his nose nuzzling his cheek till full lips reached his mouth.

Naruto was kissing him harder, unyielding, akin to some unnamed desperation that Sasuke returned in kind. His hands instinctively reached to Naruto’s t-shirt, craving to yank it out, but the blond man seized his wrists and pushed it down. Growling, Sasuke thrust his pelvis, however Naruto just remained liplocked, not touching anywhere that would provoke any sort arousal.

Naruto backed away, his eyes still brimming with affection while he combed the dark hair. He didn’t resist the yearning to brush those beguiling lips, capturing once again to a swift kiss. He released with a loud sigh, shaking his head. But Sasuke held his chin with his fingers to catch his attention, closing in with his teeth lightly sinking on the lower lip. Naruto yielded for a while, though his hands were already placing in between their bodies, slowly pushing away.

At that moment, nothing in the world mattered for Sasuke aside Naruto. He was ready to rip his heart off if necessary to keep him by his side, but Naruto uttered out:

“I think…we should really call our uber.”

That declaration was so out of left field that broke Sasuke’s line of thought. He muttered. “What?”

Naruto nodded. “Uber. We gotta call an uber. We’re pretty tired tonight right? We should go.”

Graphite eyes blinked, not quite catching the whole situation. He managed to murmur, his lips trying to reach Naruto’s but the latter deflected away. “We can go to my apartment, it’s close…”

“Yeah, um…” Naruto gently nudged Sasuke body off his lap, standing up. “I’m just⏤so fucking exhausted, I swear.”

“Naruto.” Sasuke clasped his arm. “But what about⏤”

“I know. “ He rubbed his eyelids. “I’m sorry, we’ll talk later. Okay? I’m sorry.” Naruto pleaded, gulping dryly. “I’m so sorry. I⏤” Sighing, he exited the bathroom with a thunderous noise from the door.

Sasuke took too long seconds to really absorb what happened, running in search of Naruto. Too late, he already exited the building.

What the hell just happened?

--.--

AN: Ayyyy what's this sudden angst? It's probably my fault lmao. Anyways...Hmm…while I was writing the beginning of this fic, I actually thought to myself if I didn’t embellish like it’s a cool place to work and it had so much cool prizes and recognition. So before anyone is changing their mind over their careers, let me tell you something: Most of the time, it’s a lie. And most ad agencies (at least here in Brazil) sucks. It’s changing pretty slowly, but it still sucks. You work overtime most of the time, recognition is mostly “I’ll pay for tonight’s beer” but no salary raise or bonus. There’s backstabbing involved too. Oh, and at least where I used to work, they won’t pay for those overtimes hours and even though they claim “you can rest another day”, it’s really complicated to negotiate the “I want to rest on x day”. The Las Vegas trip thing is real, but it’s something out of the norm, sadly. Also, the ad agency that gave such trip though, makes their employees work, like, twice the time. Anyways, like any job, it has its merits and its downfalls.

#NaruSasu #nssourced #sn fic #snstext #drabble

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grlwtskulltattoo · 6 years ago

Text

Fall For You - Prologue

Characters - Jax Teller x OFC (Katrina)

Summary - Katrina leaves an abuse relationship and heads home after finding out about her father’s passing. Old feelings come back to the surface for a person from her past. Story will follow the events of the show as much as possible. How might have Jax’s story changed with a different woman in his life

Word Count - 1292

Warnings - NSFW, Hardcore Smut, Violence, Angst, Adult Language, Dark Themes, Fluff, Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Accident, Mentions of Physical and Emotional Abuse.

Will add to the warnings as the story progresses. Warnings cover the whole series. Some parts will be more mild than others.

A/N - Feedback is welcomed and encouraged, and may help motivate me to continue. All mistakes are my own. If you would like to be tagged in future parts, please send me an ask to be added to the list.

Katrina looks over her left eye in the bathroom mirror. Gingerly touching the edges of the fresh bruise around it, testing it's tenderness before she conceals it with makeup. The fight her and her boyfriend, Vince got into the night before replaying in her mind. He was angry the moment she walked into their apartment after she got off of work. Apparently he had made dinner reservations at some fancy restaurant and failed to mention it to her. By the time she got home from work it was too late. If she had known sooner, she might have been able to ask her boss if she could take off early. Instead, she came home to Vince's explosive temper. Of course she didn't help the situation by going toe to toe with him.

It used to not be that way between them. The first year of their relationship had been great, they hardly ever fought. He treated her with respect, gave her space when she needed it and actually acted like he was in love with her. The last few months, however, all of that changed. Now he treats her more like an object that he owns. He has to know where she is at all times. He dictates who she can or can't hang out with, and it seems lately that list gets shorter and shorter. The last couple weeks he has been extremely short tempered, and quick to raise his hand to her. She can't seem to talk to him anymore without him blowing up at her. She is so done with this, with him, she just has to figure out what her next move will be. She has left an abusive situation in the past, and it seems she'll have to do it again.

Katrina is finishing up with her makeup when her phone starts to ring. She glances at the caller id, but doesn't recognize the number, other than it's a California area code. She hesitates picking up the phone, but the curiosity of who it could be gets the better of her.

"Hello?" She answers cautiously, tucking a stray hair behind her ear.

“Hello, is this Katrina Morgan?” A male voice inquires.

“Yeah…who is this?” Katrina feels like the voice on the other end of the call sounds vaguely familiar.

“This is Deputy Chief Hale, from Charming PD. I’m sorry to inform you that your father passed away in a fatal car accident yesterday.”

“David Hale?” Katrina asks in surprise.

“Yeah.. It’s me, David.” He confirms.

Katrina remembers David from high school. He graduated a year before her. She had no idea he became a cop. Of course she wouldn’t know since she left her hometown as soon as she graduated, almost 11 years ago.

“Was he drunk?” Katrina asks, even though she already knows the answer.

“Yes, it appears he was under the influence when the accident occurred. He hit a tree on the outskirts of town.” David pauses. “You are the only next of kin we’re aware of, so I wanted to make sure you were notified.”

“Yeah, thanks David. I’ll try to make it back there, so that I can take care of his affairs.”

“Let me know when you get into town and I’ll offer any kind of assistance I can to help you through this trying time.” David says with sincerity in his voice.

Katrina is touched by his concern and offer of help. She recalls that David was always a sweet guy in school, especially when he stood up for her when some of the girls from the cheerleading squad were trying to start shit with her. They were just jealous that she was friends with the guys they all had crushes on.

“Thank you David. If I have any problems I’ll reach out.”

They say their goodbyes and Katrina hangs up the phone. She walks into her bedroom and sits on the edge of her bed. She’s a little surprised that David was able to track down her phone number, given the fact that she left without anyone knowing where she was going. Cutting all ties with her hometown and her past. But then again, he is a cop, and probably has the resources to track that information down.

She wasn’t sure how she felt about her dad being gone. Relief maybe. Like a weight has been lifted from her shoulders. A little sadness for the relationship they could have had if he wouldn’t have turned into an alcoholic asshole after her mom died. In Katrina’s mind, her father had passed away a long time ago, when her mother was taken from them after losing her battle with cancer. It was then that he turned to liquor and drugs as a means to cope with the loss. He had turned cold and mean, only concerned with how and when he was going to get his next fix. He was constantly taking he’s anger and frustrations out on her. That was one of the reasons she left Charming as soon as she graduated high school. To escape the verbal and physical abuse at her father’s hands.

She saved up what money she was able to get her hands on and purchased a bus ticket out of town. She moved to Las Vegas and got a job as a waitress at a casino. After a couple years she became friends with a tattoo artist at a parlor inside the casino. He took her under his wing and taught her how to do tattoos as well as being the only artist she trusted to do ink on herself. She has been working part time doing both, hoping one day she’ll build up her portfolio enough to just do tattoos, and eventually open her own shop.

Katrina pulls some bags out of her closet to start packing her clothes and important items. She came to Vegas with only one bag containing some of her clothes and her most prized possessions. That’ pretty much all she’s planning on leaving with. She grabs her bags, takes once last look through the apartment to make sure she hasn’t forgot anything, then walks out the front door. Locking the door behind her, she’s ready to close this chapter of her life. She only hopes that Vince takes the hint. When she turns around to head to the parking lot, she almost bumps in to her neighbor, Tiffany.

“Hey Kat, where are you heading out to?” Tiffany asks, confusion evident on her face because of the bags Katrina’s carrying.

“I just got a call that my father passed away, so I’m heading home to take care of things.” Katrina answers her. She doesn’t usually talk to her neighbors very much.

“Oh I’m sorry to hear that. How long are you planning on being gone?”

“I don’t know yet. Depends on how long it takes to get all his affairs in order.” Katrina doesn’t want her neighbor to know she has no intentions of coming back, because that would raise too many questions that she doesn’t feel like answering.

“Okay....Well have a safe trip.” Tiffany replies.

“Thanks.” Katrina gives a half assed wave goodbye as she walks towards the parking lot.

Katrina secures her duffle bag to the back seat of her Harley sportster, and slings her backpack over her shoulders. She climbs onto her bike and fires it up. After she cinches on her helmet, she backs up her bike and takes off towards California. She’s happy to have Las Vegas in her rear view, but also nervous about what awaits her in Charming. It’s amazing that the place she ran away from all those years ago, would be the place she would be running to now....

#redwood original #SAMCRO #soa #sons of anarchy #jax teller imagine #jax teller #jax teller fanfic #sons of anarchy imagine #jax teller smut #gemma teller #chibs telford #tig trager #happy lowman #reaper crew #opie winston #samcro imagine

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crashdevlin · 3 years ago

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Marked

One Night at a Time Masterlist

Author’s Note: Part eight of One Night at a Time series.

Pairing: Dean x Reader, OMC x reader (kinda)

Word count: 3992

Story Warnings: threats of harm to reader, poor self-esteem, angst, MoC!Dean being dark and terrible, Jealous!Dean

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I told him not to trust Crowley. I told Dean not to listen to that asshole demon when he showed up. I told him we could find another way to take down Abaddon. I told him not to go to Cain.

Did he listen?

No, of course not. I'm just his not-a-girlfriend. I'm not worth listening to. Even Crowley says Castiel is closer to being Dean's girl than I am.

I followed him through those damn Trials and supported him through Sam's sickness. I followed him through the debacle of that murderous Angel trying to steal Sam and Kevin's death.

"I need a vacation," I say out loud as I look at my laptop screen. Vegas seems nice. Key West is also an option.

Dean snorts. "Yeah, right."

I glare at him. "Why not?"

"Because we got more important things to do, like finding Abaddon," Dean snaps, eyes narrowing at me.

"Yeah, well…" I stand and slam my laptop closed. "How you doin' on that one? You and Crowley found her, yet?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I'm going to bed." It's useless to argue about Crowley. It's useless to argue about the Mark or the First Blade or fucking Abaddon. I'm not here to have opinions.

"I'm not doing this, Dean. Have a nice night. I'm going to bed," I repeat.

"Let go of me." I say the words with conviction. Wavering isn't an option here. I can't show fear...isn't it insane that I'm thinking this about the man I sometimes share a bed with?

"Why are you being such a bitch?" he asks and I reach over to pry his fingers off of me. That's gonna bruise, but whatever.

"Because...I need a vacation." I step away from him. "Don't stay up all night."

"You okay?" Sam asks as we pass in the hallway.

Should I lie? Will he even care? He doesn't care about Dean right now so why would he care about what he's making me feel?

I smile and shake my head. "Just stressing over the Mark. I'm fine!"

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine," I repeat. "Don't worry about me."

Sam looks like he's going to argue for a moment, but he just nods and heads toward the kitchen. Good. I close the door and secure the lock. I pull out my phone as I move to sit on the bed.

"What has he done now?" Matilda asks as she answers my phone call.

"Am I that predictable or are you that good?" I ask.

"I'm a psychic, sweetie, and you only ever call me when you're having trouble with your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend." I run my hand down my face and lie back across my mattress. "He's losing his mind. The Mark is-"

"He never fucking shows it and it's gotten worse since he got the Mark!"

"What I'm ignoring? What about what he's ignoring? He doesn't even show me basic human kindness anymore!"

"You really think that leaving him alone...with Sam pretending like he doesn't care about what happens to him...is going to help anything?"

"Think it'll help me."

"Of course I don't want that!" I hiss at her. "But what should I even do? He's not-"

"Give him what he wants." What the hell does that mean? "He says he doesn't want to be exclusive. He wants you to be free to take other lovers, so do it."

"People don't like me, Matilda."

"Wait, is this a plot to get him to agree to a label? That's not what I called you for!" I just want to know if he'll get better.

"You think maybe he'd be a bit nicer, more controlled maybe, if he has a bit of love in his life?"

"He's already got love in his life!" I growl into the phone.

"And how should I do that?"

"Make the man jealous."

"This is my life, not some romantic comedy! That won't-"

"Yeah, yeah. The cards. I'll...think about it. Thanks for the advice, Mattie."

"Yeah. Send me a check for the reading," she jokes. "Let me know how it goes. Bye."

My phone goes off with a text and I pick it up.

It wasn’t by chance, it was by fate. And you arent pathetic.

Thanks, Mattie. I set the phone on the side table and curl up on my side. Make him jealous. How the fuck am I supposed to do that?

“No occasion. Dean said we’re too busy for me to have a vacation, but I need to blow off some steam. I’m gonna hit that karaoke bar in Smith Center; sing a few songs, drink a few beers.”

“Oh?” Sam’s eyebrow raises. “Is that all? That getup is for songs and beers?”

I swallow and smile tightly. “Sure.”

His eyes soften. “I know he’s been kinda cold lately but-”

I shake my head. “It doesn’t matter, Sam. I’m doing this because I need it.” I turn and walk down the hall, heels clicking on the floor. “Don’t wait up.”

This is stupid. Why am I doing this?

Because Mattie said to. This better fuckin’ work.

“Nice to see a woman who enjoys a good beer,” he says after he orders a Bud Light.

I fight not to roll my eyes. My Blue Moon is barely beer but it’s more beer than Bud Light. “I usually drink whiskey,” I say with a smile.

Well, right from concern to ‘Come here often?’. The man works fast.

“I stay in Lebanon. The bar there doesn’t have karaoke, though, so I am here tonight.”

“That’s okay. I’ll take you home and you can sober up.” He’s not taking the hint.

“No, Craig, listen. I don’t think I should go home with you.”

He turns to look in my eyes. “Really? I bought your beers and you’re gonna blue-ball me?”

Aren’t I?

Look at our relationship. Look at the hill of sand we’ve built. We’re nothing. Still nothing after all these years.

But I wish it would. I wish he would see me.

He won't. He really won't. He never does.

I sit on the park bench for another hour before I head back to the bar. The Impala isn't in the parking lot anymore. Guess he left...and I can go home now.

I pull into the garage and shut off the engine. Dean's car is in the garage. Great.

I set my shoes down. "You following me?"

"You avoiding the question?"

"Don't answer a question with a question."

"You did it first." He sets the whetstone beside him on the dresser and looks up from the knife. "Did you have fun with Craig?" he asks again.

I swallow and turn away from him. "Craig was perfectly fine."

"Yeah?" I flinch as he jumps down from the dresser, all rage and aggression again. I bend down to set my shoes next to the wall and avoid looking at him.

"Yeah."

"So you just...go pick up guys in bars now?" he asks and I tense up more.

"Didn't I meet you in a bar?" I snap.

I can feel him step closer to me. "Oh, and you think what happened with Craig is the same thing?"

"It is not the same-"

"Oh, please, Dean." I turn to him, frustration making me face his anger head-on. "You come to me when you need to get off and then you leave. You don't care about me and you don't like me.

"This shit again? I have told you a million times-"

"You can say it all you want, but your actions speak louder! You keep me around for convenience; you have for years. You treat me like nothing more than a sex toy."

"A sex toy?" he asks, his eyes going wide.

"Yes! I'm not your girlfriend! I'm not your partner! I'm not your friend! I'm just here for you to put your dick somewhere wet every few weeks! That's it!"

"Watch your tone," he says, his voice going dangerously low and his grip tightening on that knife. I should shut up. I should stop.

"Let me go," I try. I say it with the same conviction I said it last night, but he just twists his hand around and yanks my head back.

"Not this time, bitch." He leans down next to my ear. "You say you're a sex toy, maybe I should show you how a sex toy gets treated."

I gasp as the knife edge brushes my jaw. My heart was pounding with fury before but now it's rapidly beating with terror. "Dean," I whisper. It's a plea. I'm begging.

The knife is pressed into my neck. A single wrong move and there goes my carotid. He might really kill me. Oh, God. "Please. Don't."

"Why not? You let Craig use you. Isn't it my turn now?"

"Fine. Fine, you can use me, just put the knife away," I whimper. "I don't wanna die."

What? 'Don't come-'. He can't be serious about--he's never wanted me to leave. This isn't...this isn’t right. This isn't what was supposed to happen. This isn't what Matilda predicted.

Don't come back. Fine! Fuck him. Put a damn knife to my throat. I don't wanna be here anyway. Haven't wanted to be here. Fuck him!

I'll go North. Canada is nice this time of year. Maybe Asa will let me crash with him and his mom. Haven't seen him in years, but he always answers my texts.

I gotta call Mattie though, because what the ever-loving fuck was that about?

"I know, I know. You're mad at me," she says as I speed toward the interstate that will take me North.

"No shit, Mattie. What the hell was that?"

"You wanted to leave, didn't you?" she asks.

"Yeah, but-"

"But this was the only way you could do that without him chasing you. It had to be his idea for you to go."

"You couldn't warn me? He put a knife to my throat!"

I sigh. "You could have warned me about the knife."

"You wouldn’t have gone through with it if I had and he never would have been appalled by his actions against you and he never would have sent you away. So thank me, woman."

"Thank you, Mattie. I...I guess."

"Drive safe. Don't text Asa until tomorrow. He's on a job tonight."

"Okay. Thanks for the...thanks for the exit."

"I've always got your back. Bye, hon."

I hang up and toss the phone on the passenger seat. I'll drive up toward Emerson and call Asa in the morning.

It's interesting. I feel...lighter. This wasn't how I wanted things to go, but…at least it's over.

~~~

The Kitchen Sink - @emoryhemsworth @flamencodiva @wasabiwitteks @rainbowkisses31 @rissbennett @mariekoukie6661 @officiallyunofficialperson @dolphincliffs @mrs-meghan-winchester @gayspacenerd @foxyjwls007 @ilovefanfic86 @marvelfansworld @f-yeahfandoms @wonderlandfandomkingdom @hhiggs @sev3nruby @hobby27 @paintballkid711 @divadinag @thewhiterabbit42 @fantasymyth-1 @queenoftheunderdark @cosicas-cuquis @superfanficnatural @letsby @supernatural-bellawinchester @onethirstyunicorn @swinchester27 @chalicia @screechingartisancashbailiff @death-unbecomes-you @dayasvalkyrie @paryl @wereallbrokenangels @the-american-witch @that-one-gay-girl @tatted-trina6 @sunshineandwings86 @lunarmoon8 @wheezyeds @vicmc624 @couldabeenamermaid @vulgar-library

#cassie writes stuff #spn fanfic #harm to reader #reader-insert #dean x reader #angst

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mingyus-noona · 6 years ago

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Stubborn (Jaehyun, Taeyong, Mark, Yuta, Lucas, Jungwoo)

Title: Stubborn Members: Jaehyun, Taeyong, Mark, Yuta, Lucas, Jungwoo Fanfiction type: Oneshot Genre: Angst, Friendship, Drama Word count: 2,028 Just a short little idea I had. This is the second day of my posting spree and I’m still keeping with it. Let’s see if I make it until the 31st! Haha. Hope you enjoy it! Based on when I showed my mom pictures of NCT and she said Jaehyun’s looked like he had a hangover. I imagined him waking up in a hotel room in Vegas after a night of drinking and he sees all these random kids from his school who he doesn’t know and then Jaehyun sees they’re not that bad after all. Somehow turned into this instead, but I can still write that other one if anyone is interested. I made Jaehyun such a jerk in this. My baby D: I wanted to add more to this, but I knew if I worked on perfecting it, it wouldn’t get posted today lol ============================================================ When Jaehyun pulled into the driveway, it was 10:47, meaning the first showing of the new movie he'd been wanting to see would start in less than half an hour. Today was a professional development day at school, so there were no classes. He pulled out his phone and dialed Taeyong's number, tapping his fingers on the dashboard to the beat of the song playing from his radio. He was still waiting by the time the song had changed, and he began belting it out loud, sticking his head out his car window and in the direction of the house in an attempt to get Taeyong's attention in case he was still sleeping in. Finally, Taeyong picked up, apologizing for taking so long to answer the call. "About damn time," Jaehyun joked, getting out of the car and walking to the front door. "Is the door unlocked? I'm coming in." He turned the knob and pushed on it, shutting the door behind him. "Yeah, but I have people over. It's for a school project." "You're spending a day off from school doing homework?" Jaehyun had reached the basement door by now, so he opened it and took the stairs down to the ground level. With his phone still pressed to his ear, Taeyong said, "Yeah. We needed to finish this project, like, today. It's due second period tomorrow." Both of them hung up on the call now that Jaehyun was in the same room. "It probably won't take too long. Just pay some games or something for a bit, and then we can hang out." Taeyong gestured to the game system that was set up on the other side of the room. Jaehyun complied, but couldn't help but glance over at Taeyong here and there. He was surrounded by four other guys. Jaehyun recognized one of them as a sophomore named Mark, and he always heard other people talking about that guy. What a conceited prick. Fuck Mark. Mark was an asshole. There was another kid Jaehyun vaguely knew of, but the extent of his knowledge was that he was weird. As they were finishing up the project, he kept saying random things and being super loud. Jaehyun almost told him to fuck off, but he managed to bite his tongue and keep his comments to himself. By the time they were finished, Jaehyun learned that his name was Lucas and the guy who kept throwing pillows at him to get him to shut up was a senior exchange student named Yuta. The fourth guy hadn't even spoken, and Jaehyun still didn't know his name. "Are you guys done yet?" Jaehyun finally asked, having tired of playing video games. He tossed the controller onto the couch and stood up, walking over to the five guys huddled around the computer. Taeyong looked at his friend with a pleading expression, like he was begging for him to quit it. But then he cleared his throat and asked the fifth guy―Jungwoo--if he could proof-read the assignment for them and turn it in online. He was the best one at editing, apparently. Jungwoo nodded, and Jaehyun thought he heard him quietly mumble something, but he couldn't be too sure. "So, we can go now?" "Where are we going?" Mark asked. Jaehyun scoffed. "Not you, Lee. I don't see your name on tickets to the movies. Just me and my best friend." Mark was hardly able to hold in his laughter at the jealousy that was laced in Jaehyun's voice. "Okay," he mocked. "What are you two best friends seeing?" "None of your business." He turned to Taeyong, who gave him another soft look, as if to ask Jaehyun to stop being rude. "What?" Jaehyun asked. "It wouldn't be so bad if we all went, would it?" "We've been waiting for this to come out for months," Jaehyun pointed out. "Us. If you really want to hang out with them, you and I can see it another day then." They all looked offended that they were lumped into the "other" category, the undesired, the rejects. Jungwoo looked like he wanted to burst right open or leave or pee his pants because of the tension in the room. Yuta was probably seconds away from standing up to show this Jaehyun guy a piece of his mind. The thought was already on Mark's mind, but he was too chicken to stand up and do it. Taeyong didn't want to cause a scene, so he stayed quiet. And then there was Lucas. "So, where are we going then?" Dumbass echoed through several of their minds after his question, but they all still felt too awkward to say anything. It was clear Taeyong's friend hated them the moment he stepped foot downstairs. For no reason, other than his jealousy. If Mark were brave, he would have told Jaehyun to stop being such a big baby. Taeyong was allowed to have other friends. He and Taeyong had met in a music class and had become rather close friends. Not as close as his friendship with Jaehyun, of course, but not that of the relationship between strangers either. They'd hung out outside of class a few times and even goofed off during class by freestyling some raps. During one class period, they joked about starting a rap duo. And even though it was just a joke, part of both of them actually wanted to take it seriously, thought it would be cool to actually develop it further. "Do you wanna take this one, or should I?" Jaehyun asked Taeyong. He was about to slap the stupid out of that Lucas kid. "We could go for a hike," Taeyong suggested. Jaehyun stifled a laugh. "What now?" Mark rolled his eyes. "Well, except for one brain cell here," he gestured to Lucas, "the rest of you look skinny, weak, and soft as fuck." Lucas was about to protest and defend himself, but as Jaehyun said the word soft, with his eyes on Jungwoo, the rest of the guys glanced over at him and down to the teddy bear-printed sweater he was wearing. Jungwoo smiled nervously. "Wh-what?” Jaehyun had to bite his tongue in order to not respond and crush the kid's soul, make him cry, or both. Honestly, he couldn't understand why Taeyong would want to hang out with these losers. Okay, he understood that they had a project to work on. Whatever. But he could have easily gotten rid of them and then gone to the movies with Jaehyun. Instead, half an hour later, the six of them were getting ready to go, snacks and drinks in tow. Mark, Lucas, Yuta, and Jungwoo had brought their backpacks with them, and Taeyong easily had access to his because they were all at his house. The best Jaehyun had were the pockets of his jacket, but it'd have to do. They all raided the snack cabinet in Taeyong's kitchen and grabbed bottles of water and sports drinks before heading out. On the way there, with all of them piled into Jaehyun's car―much to his annoyance―the amount of insults were kept to a minimum. Mostly because Jaehyun had to focus on driving, but also because Taeyong made the effort to keep the conversation flowing between everyone. Little questions about what kind of things everyone was into or what plans they had for the weekend. Anything to keep Jaehyun from mocking them. Taeyong felt bad enough already for all his friend had said to them and for the fact that he hadn't really defended them, only tried to silently signal to Jaehyun to cut it out. Jaehyun wasn't a bad guy at all. He'd been Taeyong's best friend for as long as he could remember. It made sense that Jaehyun was jealous. Sure, he was being a bit childish and over-reactive, since they really need to get work done and Taeyong was allowed to hang out with other people, but Taeyong definitely understood the feeling of being left out, so he couldn't entirely be mad at Jaehyun. He was his best friend after all. Which was why when they encountered a snake later that day, Taeyong immediately grew nervous. He didn't want any of them to get hurt, but he had a soft spot for Jaehyun. And of course, he was the one to get bitten. And of course, Taeyong was a coward and couldn't even move at first. Jaehyun hadn't seen the snake coming, but he wasn't too far off from Yuta and Lucas, who were able to scare the snake away by stomping on the ground. All Taeyong could think to do was to grab his bottle of water and dump it onto Jaehyun's wound to try disinfect it. But seconds after this thought and trying to put it into action, Mark swatted the bottle away and started untying the flannel shirt from around his waist. Jaehyun protested. "He was trying to help me. What the hell? Why would you do that?" "You're not supposed to wash it. If there's venom left on the skin, it can help identify what kind of snake it is, and therefore, what plan of action needs to be taken. Keep your leg still." Mark was busy straightening out Jaehyun's leg. "Don't bend it. And stop moving. You'll make it worse." Jaehyun tried his best to comply as Mark held his shirt tightly to Jaehyun's leg. "Aren't you supposed to tie that around my leg?" Jaehyun asked. "Isn't that just going to make it spread quicker?" A hand came into contact with Jaehyun's cheek. It was a light, but still sharp, slap that left him with his mouth wide open as he stared at the person who delivered it: Jungwoo. "Ow, what was that for?" Jungwoo looked nervous, like he was regretting having slapped Jaehyun. Then he softly said, "It sounds like he knows what he's talking about. I think you should listen to him." "You're not supposed to make a tourniquet,” Mark said. “You just need to have pressure against it. As much pressure as you can. Lucas, you're stronger than me. Hold this down. Taeyong, call 911 if you have a signal." Luckily, he did, but he was so scared he could hardly move. He could barely process what was happening. First, he couldn't react to his friend being in danger. Then he almost made a mistake that could harm him even more. Now he couldn't even do one of the simplest and most important things he could do: call for help. When it was clear he was in too much shock to do what he was told, Mark took out his own phone and made the call. And there it was again. Taeyong being too much of a coward to do the right thing. It hurt him, how he kept things in and didn't do what he needed to. He couldn't stick up for Mark, Jungwoo, Yuta, and Lucas when Jaehyun was being rude. And he couldn't make a simple fucking phone call to get his best friend medical attention. And even though he felt he'd made a lot of mistakes that day, he'd been in the right mindset. He was just a little too shy to confront Jaehyun outright. After going to the hospital and receiving medical attention, which turned out to not be as necessary as the guys originally thought, Jaehyun was the one who felt worse. He definitely knew he hadn't come off as the nicest person earlier, but in his mind, he felt he was just defending his friendship with Taeyong. But the guys he'd thoughtlessly and harshly judged earlier had proven to be lifesavers. Even if the bite wasn't that serious, he was lucky enough to have had them there to begin with, because things could have easily been worse. Everyone had flaws. Taeyong was very caring, but often shy to express his thoughts, preferring to hold back in case he offended anyone. Jaehyun, on the other hand, offended people all the time, but was blinded by how his words and actions affected others. He was stubborn, judgmental, too quick to think he knew someone based off of appearance or one thing they did. But people could surprise you. So, he'd started out calling Mark Lee every bad name in the book. But now, he wasn't so bad. Sure, he wasn't going to jump at being his friend, but he was okay.

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