#(also i've been sexualizing those two old men so much

[ianthedebonair]

Heat Stroke by GQ Los Diablos

[marsprincess889]

THE PRINCESS DIARIES - coming into your power.

Astrological analysis with nakshatras

The princess diaries, 1 and 2, are forever on the list of my favorite movies. Girls all over the world feel for Mia and I'm no exception, I almost always cry during certain scenes and I'm amazed again and again by how relatable and real she is, by how those movies speak to young girls.

I've decided to break down the main themes in the two movies by analyzing nakshatras of the people involved.

A quick recap of what the story is about: Mia is a 15 year old teenager living in San Francisco with her mother. She's clumsy, awkward and has no self esteem. One day, her estranged grandmother comes to visit her from Europe to tell her that she's the only legitimate heir to rule a small country- Genovia.

Director of the movies, Garry Marshall has Ketu in Magha. Magha is about ancestors, bloodlines and it's also associated with royalty (Magha begins the signs of Leo). Ketu in a chart represents a person's primal creative energy. This explains why he was drawn to a story about royalty. One interesting fact to note is that Gary Marshall made two very iconic movies (Pretty Woman and Runaway Bride) starring Julia Roberts who has been a kind of muse to him and who has Magha moon. This is also a pattern with directors and actors, one example I can think of is Kirsten Dunst (Ashlesha moon, Purva Ashadha Ketu) being a muse to Sofia Coppola (Purva Ashadha moon, Ashlesha Ketu).

Anyways, let's get back to The Princess Diaries and analyze the heart of the two movies- the relationship between Mia and her grandmother, queen Clarisse.

Anne Hathaway - Hasta moon, Vishakha sun, Jyeshta rising

Julie Andrews - Vishakha moon, Hasta sun, Uttara Phalguni rising

SPOILER ALERT

Part 1

Hasta- strong females

The second movie's main theme is about female empowerment and independence. When the parliament refuses to let Mia rule without a husband, she has 30 days to arrange a marriage and she's willing to do it, just because she wants to rule so much that's she's ready to make such a sacrifice. At the last second she breaks down at her wedding, unable to be betray herself and finds courage inside her to make the parliament change their minds. She succeds and becomes queen without a husband.

Hasta is all about female empowerment but unlike Bharani, it's in a non-sexual, celibate way. Hasta, as a woman, completely rejects almost all male influence and is capable of being self-reliant, only opening up to rare men who she deems worthy. Hasta is the female that does not need a man and in that way, is a safe and empowering place for women.

There's a scene in the second movie where Mia stops the parade to defend a small girl from boys who were bullying her. She tells her how to be a princess and empowers her, letting her and the other kids join the parade. During the monologue at the end, when Mia is talking to the parliament at her wedding, we see women accross the country intently listening to her on the television, shushing the men . ��

Part 2

Vishakha - joining opposites

Like Hasta, both Anne Hathaway and Julie Andrews have Vishakha in their luminaries. Vishakha nakshatra is about joining opposites. It begins in the sign of Libra (partnerships, agreements, relationships, compromise) with its last quarter being in Scorpio (death, transformation, occult). Vishakha is ruled by the gods Indra and Agni- the lightning and fire gods. It's about energized ebthuasiasm, cultivating something over time, about using the pent up energy or anger. It's another name is Radha ("the gift", hence the next nakshatra being Anuradha- "after the gift".)

"The gift" is not just good, it can also be unwelcome, like in Mia's case, when she was angered by the revelation that she's a princess. Queen Clarisse and Mia are very different from each other, but neither had a choice but to compromise and agree to a bargain. They learn to appreciate their differences and embrace their similarities, thus, joining opposite forces.

They do have misunderstandings, but that's part of all relationships and eventually they bond deeply as they realize they have the same goal. Vishakha is also connected to anger and the little outbursts they both have definitely show that. One great example is when Mia ruins Lana's (her bully's) outfit and calls her a jerk in front of everyone after always just silently ignoring her remarks.

Joining opposites in this movie is not just about Mia and the Queen, it's also about the two cultures, also about the first movie being a high school drama as well as a fairytale for young girls.

Part 3

Jyeshta - from underdog to the ruler

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear."

-Mia's father to her in a letter

To me, Jyeshta is connected to the underdog who succeeds despite all odds. Jyeshta 's power is to "rise, conquer and gain courage in battle". It's the stage of intense competition. Its deity is Indra- lightning god and the king of the gods, like Vishakha. We see other kids bully Mia in the first film but she slowly places herself above it, making her point (by taking her little revenge on Lana) and then not engaging with them anymore, as she realizes her own self- worth.

A major point in the movie is when she decides not to run away despite being scared to speak to the public, showing her true courage.

Besides Indra- the king of the gods, another deity associated with Jyeshta is Dhumavati- the hag goddess who is eternally hungry. Because of this, I think Jyeshta is associated with grandmothers and our relationship to them. I personally have exalted Ketu in Jyeshta and I was practically raised by my father's late mother (unlike my sibling, mind you. I'm the eldest) and I still have a close relationship with my mother's mother. Mia, played by Jyeshta ascendant Anne Hathaway, also has a very special relationship with her grandmother.

So, in the end, the bullied underdog became a princess and eventually- a queen.

Some bonuses:

Uttara Phalguni is associated with gaining wealth and privileges from partnerships. Uttara Phalguni ascendant Julie Andrews playing queen Clarisse, who became a royal by marriage, confirms that.

Heather Mattarazo (Lily) and Anne Hathaway were born only a few days apart, hence their charts being similar and them playing best friends.

So, this is it. If you found this interesting, please, interact with me, like, comment, reblog. Take care 🤍

[inchidentally]

because apparently I can't stop being weird ! 🫠

(this is completely shipping goggles off btw and with the assumption that there's no point theorizing about these men's actual sexualities since a)male sports and b)required travel to countries where the penalty for homosexuality is death/imprisonment.)

I kind of love that we're all picking up on something new and indefinable with Lando and Oscar and it makes our hearts do a little squeeze without fully knowing why. I'm basically finding myself repeating everyone else's tags on landoscar gifsets. and it made me think about why and how Lando has had two main support systems in terms of friendships up til now. there's the F1 alphas/extroverts and then there are his childhood besties.

F1

so like every guy or group of guys I've seen with Carlos somehow admit he's in the alpha position and rotate around him as the leader. it's very much like Daniel even though Carlos and Daniel aren't much alike outside of that (Daniel makes noise to be the leader, Carlos just exists as a leader). for an ambivert like Lando, Carlos and Daniel are great places to be when he's getting pulled under. they're typical straight alpha types who don't believe in getting stuck in their heads or feelings (Carlos' 'mental health' ad basically being go to the gym and stay productive to not feel sad lol) and they exist in a kind of nonstop monologue. so little Lando can just bob along in the current and know that he'll laugh and forget whatever ails him. very much like what he needed Carlos for after the Mexico race when he looked so drained and ended up magically chipper again in Brazil (in reality bc of friendship and not a solid dicking down as I have tagged in a lot of places). or that private plane ride with Daniel where Lando looked twelve years old and so happy. Lando clearly needs to feel small again sometimes and these are the guys who can do that.

Childhood

Max F obviously has that role of truth-telling and soul-baring that honestly I could see Lando not being able to live without. the friend/soulmate you can't hide anything from. I'm absolutely projecting at this point as someone who feels verrrry simpatico with Lando's personality (as we're allowed to see it) but having that person who can love you while being honest and real with you is so SO SO needed. but! there are times when it's too much and they know that you need to just float for a while. I feel like there's that core group of guys in the Max F circle who are all to different degrees like this with Lando. they're much more his equals in power dynamic too.

Oscah??

I think this is where Oscar exists in like a third, unexplored space. he's been caught in 4K as a Lando fanboy but he's also got sleepy cat personality so you can only tell from the internet evidence and from the way his eyes track Lando every time they're in the same rough vicinity that he's still fairly starstruck.

to me it's like Oscar hasn't quite shaken the norm of watching Lando on his phone screen and he almost forgets that he's supposed to be the one interacting with Lando in the challenges etc.

now if you've watched the Prema content on YT you'll know that Oscar, while still sleepy and placid, absolutely knew how to play up for social media content. sure the pressure wasn't that high and he'd known some of those boys for years by then. but his timing was solid and he adopted a sarcastic voice-of-reason role to bounce off the other guys. but what's so endearing about the McLaren content is that Oscar has basically positioned himself as guest star in the Lando Show. it's like he's so relieved at how good Lando is at media content that he spends a lot of his role in it watching what Lando is doing. I'm serious when I say it seems like he forgets he's not watching Lando on a screen like he always used to.

I do however think it's a confident and conscious decision that he made to not even bother trying to be another Carlos or Daniel - or to try and copy paste a little of the banter he'll have seen Lando have in Quadrant videos. I really love that Oscar's said you know what I'm being me and it so happens I'm nothing like those other people in Lando's content.

but !! you know who's personality and sense of humor Oscar most resembles? Max F. dry humor, sleepy but can get riled up and fun when they're feeling it. sort of fondly exasperated with Lando a lot of the time. I loved the stream of Max watching the Most Likely To with Lando and Oscar because he sided with Oscar so many times and appreciated Oscar bringing up the birthday issue.

and I think that's where for Lando he's still pretty damn thrown by Oscar - not in a bad way, just still uncertain. Oscar doesn't fit with Lando's extroverted F1 world. Oscar's plenty friendly with the rest of the grid (and obv Logan) but he's choosing to largely go under the radar and he runs his social media very lowkey even during some of the major highs he's had his rookie season. he's there to race F1 cars and when that's over he's got a very good brain in his head and plenty of options. he doesn't have the same insecurities that a lot of the drivers admit to having. Lando can't rely on Oscar being a typical F1 driver to understand him.

to finally come around to some kind of point I think what we're seeing is Lando and Oscar tiptoeing around a friendship that would probably develop very fast and easily if it weren't for the F1 pressure and expectations. we're seeing Lando unusually flustered by how easy he gets Oscar's attention and how he seemingly can't annoy or inadvertently piss off Oscar even if he tries to wind him up in videos or if he gets lost in admiration for his own trophy while Oscar shrugs off his own P14 finish and smiles at Lando. I genuinely think that level of undemanding affection has Lando sort of squirmy in an adorable way.

and Oscar clearly went into the personal side of his relationship to Lando of just enjoying whatever he gets and not trying to be someone he isn't. rookie seasons are already so pressure packed and the drama with Alpine followed by the rough start McLaren had won't have helped. he's just trying to do his job and prove his place and honestly isn't bothering to hide that he's baffled and flustered at finding himself interacting with Lando Norris the way Carlos Sainz and Daniel Ricciardo were. it's easier to just let people see that Lando can wrap him around his finger.

when all the time, if they'd met via Max F or mutual non-F1 friends, Oscar would fold right into Lando's group like butter on toast. I think that's what we pick up on with either or both of them getting shy and crushing on each other like new best friends at school. F1 has picked them up and put a camera on them and we're watching them slowly learn if it's okay to put an arm around each other or sit very close or touch the other person's hair. because they know this is very Real FriendTM friend potential and they don't want to spook each other and their feelings could so easily be hurt if they thought the other person didn't want to be friends as much or if they'd turn their back on them in front of their other friends.

they're not interacting as Typical Blokes by horseplay or teasing or being loud and they're not Just Guys Bein Dudes using humor and sarcasm to figure out the pecking order.

most of the time they're so shy or Lando's in a mood and Oscar finds it adorable and they're watching each other so closely the whole time like this and aauuuuhhggggg it's so vulnerable and sweet.

that's how it feels to me anyway and why I'm so ???!!! watching them interact. and sidenote I'm so so glad Oscar is so steady and can celebrate Lando no matter what. bc Lando admits he struggles with that in turn and after the many times it's been tested it's clearly never going to be something that breaks them before they can continue to get closer <3

[theredengineapologist]

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone! 💙❤

Of course, I had to do something Jameward for the occasion. Even though this meme is literally called "Understand my Ship in 5 Minutes", I still wanted to include some commentary/headcanons because I've been DYING to talk about them forever. So if you're interested, read on under the cut!

(Also, please note that the interpretation of the characters depicted here is specifically for my AU, TTTE: Sudrian Boys)

NAMES: For the sake of making sure their names fit in the boxes, I used the last names they picked for themselves before they got married. When they do eventually get legally married, they'll combine their last names together (a conclusion they got to after much bickering). So respectively, they will be James and Edward Hughes-Pettigrew.

GENDER + SEXUALITY:

James is GAY. GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY. Sorry not sorry, but there is not a woman-liker bone in his body.

Edward, on the other hand is bi. Part of me thinks he tends to prefer the company of men, but maybe that's just because there's significantly more male engines on Sodor. Also he is nonbinary. This will be something I explore later. But to summarize, Edward never felt entirely male in the strict sense that humans define it. However, he felt the need to be the consistent, steady, "old reliable" his peers saw him as, so he never questioned what others chose to call him. This changed when "The Great Shift" happened (aka, the engines learning to shift into a human-like form). Edward saw an opportunity to experiment with his presentation, and so he had a brief stint where he tried going in the opposite direction, presenting as a woman named Alice. As fun as it was, however, he found that it didn't feel quite right either. To him, "Edward" was where he felt most at home. He's not a man or a woman, he is just "Edward". Edward uses "he/they" pronouns because those feel the most neutral to them.

HORNY LEVEL: I will not be elaborating.

AWKWARDNESS LEVEL: I don't think Edward and James ever really had an "awkward phase". Before they got together, they always felt comfortable with each other as close friends would. They never really had that thing of "oh I want to tell him I like him but I also don't want him to know". Edward always knew he liked James, he just didn't say anything because he didn't think James was interested. And once James admitted to himself that he liked Edward, he confessed and it was all smooth sailing from there. To be honest, not much changed when they moved from "close friends" to "boyfriends". They still act like close friends, just with added kissing privileges.

JEALOUSY LEVEL: At the point where they're at in their relationship right now, both James and Edward are pretty secure, so it's rare for either of them to act jealous.

From Edward's perspective, he knows that James is young (relatively speaking) and very attractive, so it's hardly surprising to see that other people would try to flirt with him. There's a small pang of jealousy that comes from him thinking James would have preferred someone younger or stronger, but that quickly goes away once he sees James return to being on his arm and very proudly proclaiming he's already spoken for.

From James's perspective, he thinks Edward is the real catch between the two of them. Plus, it's not often that other people would try to shoot their shot with the silver fox. So when other people do try to get a little too close for comfort, James would certainly be stewing in jealousy. If the feeling gets to a certain point, he'd probably make himself known. But once they get home, the situation gets explained out, and they're cuddling on the couch with a blanket and some tea, James finds he can let go of the jealous feeling relatively quickly.

BIG SPOON/LITTLE SPOON: Majority of the time, James is the little spoon. He likes to be held and Edward LOVES holding him. James's favorite thing is when Edward keeps their hand on his chest. But occasionally, they do switch places, especially if Edward has a particularly hard day. Sometimes Old Iron wants to be cuddled too.

LENDS/BORROWS CLOTHES: Both of them tend to steal borrow clothes from each other, but under different circumstances.

At home, it's relatively commonplace to see Edward walking around in one of James's pants, shirts, or even his prized red coat. But more often than not, these are cases of Edward just picking them up of his own accord and James just letting him have it.

Outside, it's James who more actively does the borrowing and Edward who does the lending. James likes to go out ✨IN STYLE✨ without taking into consideration pesky things like the weather. So when James (inevitably) gets cold at night, Edward is the one to lend him his jacket.

PET NAMES: They don't use pet names often, but they do use some of the more basic ones on occasion. For James, Edward would sometimes call him "Jamie", "darling", "dear", or his personal favorite, "love". James usually calls Edward by his full name because Edward prefers it, but sometimes he might slip in an "Eddie", "baby", or a "kitten" in there just to make the old man flustered.

AFFECTION THROUGH WORDS/ACTIONS: This one might seem paradoxical, but let me explain.

James is more receptive to affection through words because he's used to being dismissed. In his worst moments, he can be pretty down on himself as his insecurities eat away at him. At times like these, Edward knows exactly what to say to help James pick himself back up again. It's especially meaningful because Edward absolutely means everything he says. He's not the type to lie just to make James feel better. He's honest and straightforward. If James did something wrong that needs calling out, Edward will tell him (politely of course). So when Edward tells James that he's wonderful or that he's a "really splendid engine", he 100% means it. And you can tell from just the look in his eyes that Edward loves his red boyfriend SO DAMN MUCH.

Conversely, Edward is more receptive to affection through actions. Edward is always the one out caring for everyone else and tends to forget to care for himself too. But at the same time, he's very much the type to never ask for help (even if he needs it). James knows this, so he goes the extra mile to help take some of the load off. If Edward is especially tired one day, James will step up and do Edward's share of the housekeeping without being asked. He'll volunteer to go supervise Bill and Ben so that Edward can take a day off. He'll fix up a warm bath for Edward after a hard day. Anything to make sure Edward is taken care of, James will do it. Not only that, but James is also the one planning most of their dates. ;)

CONFESSING:

Edward NEVER had any plans to confess to James. Romantic relationships are uncommon amongst engines since there's no real use for them. Plus, he didn't think James would be interested in a plain old iron like himself (as he views himself anyway). So Edward was just content to just feel his feelings and never act on them.

James, on the other hand, took several years to both realize and accept that he was in love with Edward. But once he got to that point, he confessed fairly quickly. Sure, there was a normal amount of hesitation and worry that Edward might not feel the same. But he was about 90% sure that Edward loved him back so he didn't end up worrying that much leading up to the confession.

CAN'T DRIVE LOL: Even as engines, they can't drive themselves. Plus, they know trains are the superior way to travel. So if they ever need to go somewhere while shifted into humans, they just catch one of their friends' trains. I don't think they've ever even sat in a car before.

COOKING: Edward loves to cook (especially baking). It was one of the first hobbies he picked up after learning how to shift and he would often make meals to share for the entire Steam Team. James, on the other hand, can cook, but not nearly as well as Edward. He doesn't know as many dishes as Edward. Even the ones they both know, James's, for some reason, aren't as good. The only time James would ever take over cooking is if Edward is feeling too exhausted to do so. There's a mutual acknowledgement between them (and also the rest of the Steam Team) that Edward is the superior chef (and he also enjoys it more). So if he can help it, James prefers to leave the cooking to Edward.

PDA: James absolutely LOVES PDA. He will take literally every opportunity he can to dote on Edward in public so that the entire island knows that they're together, much to Edward's embarrassment. Edward secretly loves the PDA too, and he appreciates how proud James is to be his boyfriend (and later husband). But Edward would never admit it. He tries really hard to at least appear decent in public. That said, when the opportunity arises, Edward does like getting to flip the script and fluster James in front of onlookers.

OVERPROTECTIVE/CHILL GOING: Both are more than reasonably protective over each other, but for different reasons and under different circumstances.

James gets into accidents relatively often, usually as the result of his own dumbassery. So Edward has gotten to a point where he's not too concerned if James winds up in an accident again. He'll still worry a little and warn James to be more careful next time, but Edward knows after a trip to the Steamworks that his boyfriend will be good as new again.

It's when they're shifted into humans when Edward becomes more protective of James.

Because of the way James looks, it's unfortunately not uncommon for James to get harassed while shifted as a human. When this happens, Edward goes into full protective mode to make sure his beloved stays safe. Thankfully, it doesn't happen too often. But it does happen often enough that Edward feels like he has to keep close watch of James while they're traveling after nightfall.

James, on the other hand, always has a bit of worry for Edward at the back of his mind. He knows Edward is capable of handling himself, but he also knows that Edward is old and doesn't recover from accidents as quickly or easily as he does. He worries that if the damage is too great, Edward could be scrapped. So if Edward were to end up in any sort of accident, James would go ballistic. He's puffing over right away to make sure his beloved is okay and may or may not have a fierce word with whoever caused the accident. The same thing goes when they are in human form. If Edward were to end up in some sort of fight, James would put himself in harms way to make sure Edward is protected (even though in human form, Edward is actually physically stronger than James).

RELATIONSHIP EXPERIENCE: Neither of them had any relationship experience before each other, they were each other's firsts. You can maybe argue that Edward has slightly more experience because he's had crushes on other people in the past, but fleeting attraction that is never pursued could hardly count for true experience. Their whole relationship is something that James and Edward are navigating together. It's new and at times a little scary, but there's nobody else James and Edward would rather be with than each other.

[piglet26]

Reylo. Sorry, but it's not abusive

Star Wars is not selling abusive relationships to young girls nor conditioning them into aspiring to them. Reylo is not propaganda from disgruntled single middle aged woman. It wasn't promoting abusive relationships when Luke still found love for his father despite Darth Vader cutting off his hand. Luke fans, young and old, were not attacked as being dumb or needy for liking Luke or how he viewed his father. It damn sure wasn't considered abusive when Anakin choked Padme and she still held hope for him in her heart. Or, that Obi-Wan still held a love for Anakin despite everything Darth Vader had done. Then there was Reylo.

Being a Reylo is not something I feel I need to defend. Let me love what I love in peace. That's what I believe. I did not actually see any of the sequel trilogy until after it was concluded. I was not on any fandoms during the rollout and marketing for the films. Thank God. However, I have gathered enough to understand it was horrible how Reylos were being regarded. It was beyond patronizing. I'm not new to fandom, hell I've been on soap opera fandoms for quite some time and believe me that's a savage space, but wow.

I want to clarify some of the feedback against Reylo and reaffirm why it's such a compelling pairing. Further more, I regard it as an compelling attribute to the Star Wars universe that only added to the franchise.

Now I've seen the domination of woman twisted up and called romance (see Twilight and 50 Shades of Gray), but I don't think people understand WHY those relationship were as such. Rey, on her own, is one of the strongest and most badass female leads to ever appear on the big screen. Despite people thinking she doesn't have a personality she is a resourceful, tough, innocent, loyal, hopeful and strong. She has agency unlike Bella Swan. She is not sexualized by Kylo Ren unlike the 50 shades girl. Her gender is neither a hindrance nor an advantage. She has the agency to save herself, but she is also saved.

Which is really one of the main issues. There is the patronization of Rey as a character, the people who like her and the people who like the pairing. While those 50 shades of gray books didn't buy themselves rather than listening to why Reylos liked the pairing they were told why they did and then dismissed. Or, there's the men that wanted Rey to be with Finn because Finn was the "nice guy" who they identified with.

Rey doesn't need a love interest - not all heroines need love interests, but why does it imply she's weak if she does have a love interest? Heroes infamously have a female counterpart which helps make them viable. It doesn't make them any less interesting as an individual.

Kylo Ren and Rey are NOT a couple but instead representatives of opposing sides in a war. This is the most important part. From the get-go they have an intense dynamic. Both have had visions and dreams of the other and they recognize something in one another. Kylo Ren did kidnap Rey, however, if you consider fighting your enemies “abusive” or interrogating war prisoners as “domestic violence”.............well, that is odd.

As quotes about them

What if your soulmate in the Force was your enemy? Circumstance, pits them against each other, but the Force bonds them together. They understand each other almost from a point of view of fate. And yet, fate has made them enemies.

While Kylo Ren is fascinated by In the moments of the interrogation, gender and sexuality have nothing to do with Kylo’s actions. J.J. made the conscious choice to show us the same scene twice (Kylo Ren interrogating his enemies) so the audience can spot the differences between the two. Sorry J.J, you trusted people too much.

We're able to see very clear aggression and abuse come from Kylo Ren for Poe. He has zero interest in him personally. He needs information and he will get it. The force and his ability to read someone's mind is a tool within his disposal. Now why isn't Poe's interrogation considered sexual assault?

"You know I can take anything I want" HE CAN READ HER MIND! He's not talking about raping her for God's Sake! He asked her to freely provide information and she didn't want to. However, he has a tool to use against a girl adding his enemies - a tool he'll use if she doesn't want to snitch. She knows this he already read her mind - so why not give the information freely?!

Rey also invaded his mind, so did she mind-rape him too?

The line that fans almost never seem to talk about in The Force Awakens is when Kylo says to Rey “Don’t be afraid, I feel it too.” What did he feel? The best I'm able to understand is what they felt was their force dyad igniting or fulfilling.

Ren becomes personally invested in Rey. Not with her cause, or her affiliation with the Resistance, but with her and what he wants from her.

“Kylo chased Finn and Rey outside Starkiller Base to fight them! He threw Rey against a tree!” Well she was going to shoot him..... I would've thrown her against a tree to save myself. His issue in that moment was Finn. Finn was the "traitor" in questioned and his unfinished business. They fought, but really it was a dueling exercise. Kylo Ren wanted to test her skills and her powers. If he wanted her dead there was a convenient edge to push her over, hell he offered to teach her. Rey was the one to go ape and almost kill him.

Again, I'm not implying that they aren't messy - they are. For literary nerds this is why they are a compelling heroine/villain. Ultimately one will greatly affect the other. The tension in between them is why it's great.

Ben Solo, least we forget, is himself an abuse victim. This is canon. While Kylo Ren has learned abusive techniques, they are at war. Applying abusive characteristics to a fictional character in a war setting without any attempt to incorporate the story is bizarre. Why was he able for the first time to stand against his abuser? Rey. He couldn't stand up for himself but he stood up for her. Ultimately, Kylo Ren wanted to 'break the wheel" that's what he claimed. If he was honest, he'd admit he had no clue of how to do that.

Most abusers are charming and irresistible when you first meet them. Ben has NEVER dishonest with Rey about who he is. Rey is very aware of the horrible side of him and even refers to him as a monster. He affirms her accusation that he is a monster.

During their force bonds because of the nature of the bond Rey is in a position to hear him out and try to understand how he became the monster he is today. When she learns that he didn't become this on his own, that Luke, his parents and Snoke contributed to his downfall she had hope in him. It's also important to make the distinctions that when she has a vision of him, it's as Ben. It's like a bipolar personality. When Kylo Ren goes all Darcy marriage proposal - she reject him. She rightfully spurned him when he resorted to cruelty to sway her to his side. Rey turned down Kylo as long as he was the ’bad guy’, and only kissed him as Ben ’the good guy’.

“He only wants to use her for her power.” Oversimplification that Rey is actually guilty of. Kylo Ren is lonely and within Rey he finds not only an equal but the most intense emotional connection he's ever had. The most intense connection she's ever had. Let's not forget they are probably both virgins. Then they are in each other's head. That's intense. When Kylo makes his plea to Rey it's out of not only loneliness but truly wanting her for her.

Also, Kylo doesn’t say he wants them to rule together as “master and apprentice”. He wants Rey to be his empress, his queen which is what Rey means. He’s literally proposing by offering her the entire galaxy. Ultimately Reylos see them as two equally powerful archenemies dedicating themselves to defeating the other but also find themselves strangely drawn to each other in ways they might not want to admit. Then two soul mates on the other side of a conflict.

This is built on the idea that hate itself is a sort of twisted form of love. It is, or, rather hatred is born from things like fear, pain, betrayal and love. Their connection is complicated. One minutes they last out at one another and the next they lean into each other. People can regard this as toxic. Others, like myself, regard this as the gray side of love. Reylo represent the yin yang of the force. The light and the dark craving each other and finding themselves frustrated.

Notice how many hero/villains find themselves telling others that only they are allowed to kill/harm their nemesis, in a subconscious effort to protect their nemesis from others. And they may also get strangely jealous when their nemesis fights other people.

Other people give this argument because they believe the popularity of antiheroes in media is a sign of society’s moral decay. The First Order for all we know is not a fascist society. We have no idea the ideology of the First Order. We know their clothing was inspired by the Nazis.

Red String of Fate: the two connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of place, time, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break

Kylo Ren and Rey BOTH want to be together, believe in the other, but are held back by their individual idea of what means. How is that abusive?! Maybe it's back to thinking little girls won't be able to understand the complexity of Reylo. Huh, well little boys can understand the complexity of Batman and Joker. If little boys are smart enough to realize the difference between fiction and reality and are able to watch a love/hate relationship between a good guy and a bad guy, I’m pretty sure the girls can handle it too. Rey has hope and belief that Kylo Ren can be good, she won't stay by his side while he's doing bad.

What is Reylo? In a way. Iconic

[rom-e-o]

After Wolf and Bess get together, at a "small" gala the Twins and girls attend, an old, pretty face from their past shows back up. Not Isabel or Belle. They would be welcomed.

Turns out, years ago when the Twins were in their 30s, Marley took on another apprentice. She was quite young, early-early 20s, smart, but more ambitious than anything. Like, so ambitious it was both an asset and flaw.

She didn't stay working for Marley long as she was snapped up quickly by even bigger bosses due to her talents, both in numbers but mostly in bed. Yeah, she's one of those people. Which I mean, get your bag, I guess? Can't say I agree with the methods, but as long as you're not hurting people, better for my mind to keep out of it. (Also, yeah, she most likely got her position with Marley by exchanging some favors.)

She was never romantically or sexually involved with the Twins. They were rebuffing advances hard and barely registering people's sexes by that stage. But she was definitely interested, and in Wolf especially. She did a lot of the street work with him, always opting to accompany him even if she had other duties in the office. Yes, she propositioned him. A lot. Again, he never bit. Honestly can't tell you if he even ever considered that she was being serious. Not very long after finally getting the vibe this thing was never going anywhere, she dipped and got taken on by a fish bigger than Marley.

Then, years later, she shows up at this party. Successful, married, well known, stunning and vibrant. She's got everything.

Now, when I say she's stunning, here's the thing: she and Bess resemble each other somewhat. Dark curls, dark eyes (this chick's eyes are almost black they're so dark brown), cool complexion, freckles (this girl only has a few cute ones over her nose and cheeks), full lips, hippy and bootylicious, taller than average. Except this woman is willowy and petite in frame as opposed to Bess' stout shieldmaiden-esque build. She's also busty. Not Connie levels, but she's got some spectacular girls to show off compared to Bess. Woman is the definition of a bombshell, especially showing up in the dress she does which may as well just be a few strips of luxurious cloth sewn together. (But damn if they don't fit her amazingly and look more glam than the dress Bess has on.)

She's also extremely bubbly in a self-centered and sexually charged way. She sees the boys, rushes them to embrace them, and is almost immediately yapping about her life while skillfully working in references about her exploits. ("Sammy?! Charlie?! Oh my God, how are you?! I haven't seen you two in... Bloody fuck, how long has it been? At least a dozen CEOs I've been under since Marley! Hahaha! Oh, boys, let's catch up, shall we? Have I got tales to tell you! Where should I start? Oh, I know! I'll start with my first marriage. I met my first husband on his honeymoon in Bora Bora, you know. Without his clothes, he wasn't much to look at, but that's what alcohol is for, yes? He wasn't much of a fuck either, honestly, but he certainly did open my eyes to some new things I went on to try with my second and third husbands.")

Btw, she does this while the girls are away for a moment in the powder room, so when they come back they're smacked in the face with a strange woman loudly regaling their men with a story of how her first orgy was, funnily enough, in a board room. ("It certainly changed my bar for how board meeting should be handled, I'll tell you that!") Adonis looks uncomfortable to say the least. Wolf, who definitely got used to this sort of sexual talk from this woman so many years ago, has the look of, "Yep, just another Tuesday".

The women are introduced. The interloper quickly latches onto Connie being Adonis' fiancée. ("So you're what could finally get him to open up and settle down. Ha! Never thought it possible! Tell me, Darling, what's Sammy like without his clothes on? The time I had trying to find out! I thought maybe they didn't come off; maybe they were permanently sutured to his skin!")

Bess is hardly given a "howdy-do". Wolf does introduce her as his sweetheart, of course, but it earns Bess a particularly but subtly chilling gaze from the interloper. ("Girlfriend? Oh, how nice. Such a cute little thing. Young too. Finally sowing those oats, ey, Charlie?")

As the night goes on, the interloper remains latched to the group, especially the boys, especially Wolf. Wolf is always beside Bess, of course; never bites at all the hooks the interloper throws out... but he doesn't really rebuff her either? He kind of just seems... oblivious to all of her passes and insinuations. To be fair, they can be hard to pick up sometimes as every other thing that comes out of this woman's mouth seems to be related to sex. (The group is painfully aware of how many marriages she's had--on her seventh--and what each one really liked to do in bed.)

At some point Bess goes to get a drink. Much to her annoyance, the interloper comes with. As they're at the refreshment table, a conversation is struck up.

"So. You and Charlie, hm?"

"Yes. Wolf and me."

"Wolf? Your pet name for him? Haha! That's cute! Did he get that from the bedroom scene?"

"Um, no. No, he's always been Wolf to me. Even when we were friends."

"Ah. So he's not a wolf in the sack then?"

"... I really don't think that's any of your business."

"Oh, come on, Love. We're both adult women here. You're a wannabe midwife--you're not exactly uneducated about the relationships between men and women. I tried to shag your Wolf for years and couldn't make him bat an eye, and now a cherubic little girl like you comes along and suddenly, not only is he shagging, he's calling you his "sweetheart". Do a fellow girl and favor and satisfy her curiosity."

"I'd rather not."

"... Oh. Oh, I see. You're one of those."

"One of those?"

"Yeah, one of those little prudes. The little prudes that call liberated women like me "whores" and "sluts" because they're jealous I can get men and action they can't."

"Maybe you get called those things because you seem thirsty for anything with a dick that walks on two legs and actively pursue taken men."

"Ah. So the little cherub does have some bite. All right. Maybe you're not a prude."

"Maybe I'm not."

"Maybe you're something worse. One of those pious little girls that's "saving herself for marriage". As if that's something to aspire to."

"Not that it's any of your business either, but I'm not waiting for marriage."

"No. But "somebody special", I'll bet. Or "when you feel ready"."

Bess can't say anything. That's exactly what she's waiting for, what she's making Wolf wait for.

"Ha. In that case, Charlie's definitely going to need a real woman to show him what a good time is tonight. Well, doesn't the universe work in mysterious ways."

"The universe or your assistant reading the guest list for this party?"

"What's it matter when such amazing opportunities arise?"

"Aren't you remarried? Like, newly?"

"Hahaha! Oh my, little frumpy cherub, haven't you learned anything about me tonight? Rings never stop me, whether they're his or mine."

"You honestly think you can make Wolf give you a second glance when I'm right there beside him?"

"He'll have to give me all the glances if you're not here, won't he?"

"What?"

With a quick look around to see if anyone is noticing, the interloper picks up the bowl of punch and just dumps it over Bess before she can even react. "Oh my god--I'm so sorry! Typical me--just can't control my intrusive thoughts sometimes. At least it's not a total loss--this look wasn't doing anything for you."

Bess can just stand in shock and boiling fury. She hasn't endured anything like this since high school. And maybe that's what sets her mindset back to make her react like she does from here on out.

"Go home, L&D nurse. Maybe your old Marley's daughter, but you and I both know you don't belong here. And you certainly don't belong with someone like Charlie."

And with that the interloper walks away back to rejoin the group.

Bess just runs after that. She doesn't think, she just leaves the gala without a word and catches a taxi back to the cottage. It's not until she's already on the way home she thinks to let the others know she's left, and it's only text messages that start coming in that makes her think of it.

Connie: ~Hey, are you okay? [Interloper] said you weren't feeling well and decided to leave? Do you want me to come home and help you?~

Wolf: ~Are you all right? [Interloper] said you were feeling ill and left. Do I need to come take you to a hospital?~

Bess just tells them not to worry and that she's fine, just going home early to rest, and they should stay at the party. After all, she doesn't want them to see her this way. And the interloper was right: She didn't belong back there. And who is she even kidding? She hardly belongs with Wolf either.

She finds the cottage, mercifully empty when she gets there (except for Sunshine, of course) and just strips down as she beelines for the bathroom, throwing her dress in the trash on the way. Bess doesn't know how long she sits in the shower, but the water is cold before she gets out. And she cries the entire time.

(Why do I keep dreaming up all these horrible scenarios for Bess while you give me nice ones for Connie?)

OHHH BESS. ;; Bess, Bess, I want to hug her so bad.

First of all, Interloper has done the impossible - she's at Karen levels of annoying. Now, we don't know if she's abusive like Karen, BUT from the sound of her, she sound like an emotionally and potentially physically manipulative bully to others.

It is INTERESTING how she looks similar to Bess, but she's still obviously jealous of Bess:

Bess is beautiful. They look alike, after all. They're built different, but both are womanly and gorgeous.

Bess is YOUNGER than her. She seems like the type of person that would be annoyed by that, especially since she can't buy time back. she even tries to demean Bess by calling her 'cute' or 'cherubic.' Bess is a younger woman, and it irks her.

Annnnnd finally, Bess has Wolf; the prize SHE wanted but could never get, even in the 'prime of her life.' Even when they look similar. He never chose her. That must eat her up.

The way she flutters up and gets insanely personal with the Twins SO quickly is beyond tone-deaf. Like, time and place! Also, when someone clearly isn't in to you, you GOTTA take a hint!

I picture the ladies coming back from the powder room and seeing this woman accosting the boys. Wolf looks unamused and Adonis looks uncomfortable.

Connie sees Adonis looking flustered and goes in to redirect the woman's attention and help. Connie reads and clocks her pretty quick, I'd imagine. Her comment about him undressing earns a chuckle, and not a friendly one.

"Well, [Interloper] it's much easier to get one out of their clothes when there is mutual interest in the whole affair. I assure you, my Adonis and I have no such concerns. He is positively sterling in ALL regards." As then kisses Adonis' cheek for good measure and smiles. Then she gives Bess a nervous glance. You know the look, it says "girlfriend, watch out for this one."

This woman's attitude and verbiage toward Bess would catch Wolf's attention. He picks up on her choice of words, and with eat passive-aggressive taunt earns a squeeze from Wolf. His lips even skim the crown of her head as he calls her "sweetheart."

I don't think Wolf stops the Interloper from following Bess to the drink table because, honestly, it doesn't don on him that this woman would go for Bess. He thinks, "I can ignore her, so can Bess." He might not realize immediately that women play a little dirty with each other, and that perhaps she has other goals.

THEN, the punch situation. I don't blame Bess for leaving, poor woman. just to ... escape it.

When Interloper comes back, red flags are everywhere.

"Where did Bess go?" Wolf asks her, his tone only slightly suspicious. He's more concerned.

"No clue," she shrugs. "Feeling sick, she said. Stomach bug. Poor girl. Oh, but don't you worry, Wolf-y. I'll keep you entertained."

Annnnd the sirens go off. She should NOT know that nickname. His brow furrows.

Connie and Wolf text her, but her message that she left provides little comfort. She's safe, but ... it's not right. Connie stares her down, her face a mask of doubt.

C: Interesting timing of her illness, all things considered.

I: Just what are you implying?

Meanwhile, Wolf is obviously antsy. Looking around. He looks out of sorts without his Brightness at his side.

Wolf: Something isn't right. ... Sammy, you're going to hate me for this, but-

Adonis: Charlie, go check on her. I'll handle any speeches if we're called on stage, and Connie and I will ... distract our friend. It shouldn't be hard.

Wolf gives his a thankful squeeze on the shoulder and darts out. He grabs a cab and makes a beeline for the cottage. As he arrives, he texts her to let her know he's on his way. I imagine he has a key by this point, but he's not going to just creep in.

Then, he calls and leaves a voicemail:

W: Brightness, it's me. I'm outside. I wanted to check on you. You left so suddenly. If you're sick, I'd much rather help you feel well than spend another second in that stuffy ballroom and hear [Interloper] talk about ... ugh, I apologize for her. If she did anything, I need you to tell me. I can If you get this, can you just ... let me know that you're really okay? You know what I mean.

A part of him hopes he's not being too smothering, but ... he has a feeling in his gut. And he means every word. No gala is worth attending without her company.

It's the DRAMA, the delicious hurt-comfort goodness!

Meanwhile: Interloper continues to be loud and obnoxious, all while Adonis and Connie chug champagne to tolerate her.

[whyreyousoobsessedwithme]

Do you think PTJ will make Gun x Crystal a ship? I mean, the fanart on his page might be foreshadowing something plus he likes to throw in ships at the worst times. And since Gun didn't let Charles kill Crystal because he either felt bad or wanted to see how far Charles will go for his goal of becoming a king, he might end up catching feelings for her. I mean it looks like a platonic, sibling-like relationship but we thought the same for Vin and Sujin so.💀

527- 530 Spoilers, thoughts + theories. I know I was supposed to answer this like 3 weeks ago, but I've been busy with work and other things.

Personally, I hope not. What those two need rn is therapy and healing. But yeah, I could see ptj making Gun fall for Crystal. It'll be onsided for sure, though. It's kind of obvious he plans to put Daniel and Crystal together. Hopefully, they maintain a platonic relationship, I really think it would benefit both Gun and Crystal since they're both lonely children suffering due to their family's actions.

527

How the hell did Gun end up on the beach like that without anyone else noticing him?

It is genuinely pissing me off how normal and kind Gap is acting despite being a serial cheater. "A place without honor," he says, like he doesn't cheat on his wife every Tuesday.

I have a lot of questions about how Gun got into prison. Did Gap pull some strings? Did he steal something in order to be put there because he had a white collar, but that would mean that the court was invovlved too and since Gun is a Japanese citizen wouldn't they try to contact his family? OMG, I hope they didn't make him spread the cheeks for inspection. He's too young.😟

Pls, I was joking when I said he probably went to prison to train

I NEED to know how Charles ended up as a prison volunteer. Also, how did Gun recognize him? Did he also come in contact with Charles in the past?

I need to know exactly just what Charles' plan was that he was willing to beg Gun and kill his own child. This old hairstyle of his also confirms that he was the one who hit crystal in the past, and after reading this chapter, it was most likely because she was ruining his plan by being too weak and emotional.

Gun hit a growth spurt in prison, yet somehow his clothes still fit him?

I don't think Goo stabbed his master on purpose, and even if he did, he probably had a good relationship with his master. Also, cut down goblins, really? (I'm being picky i know)

528

I personally think Goo, at least in the past, is stronger than gun.

I think the reason Gun yaps so much during fighting is because he's having fun.

Not Goo being Gun's sexual awakening

It always baffles me how these guys fight literally anywhere, and NO-ONE ever walks in on it. Like people visit the park ALL the time.

Shintaro already looks like he's not taking it well. The guilt is settling in. He looks worn out by everything.

529-530

It's shocking and low-key annoying to know the main reason Gun ruined so many lives is because he wanted to see a hypothetical situation play out to heal his daddy issues.

No way these grown ass men's first thought at seeing Gun again was "goblin"

Momma Park coming thru at the end, I told yall she cared for him in her own way.

Ptj, please stop making their bitties bigger than their head, its scaring me😭

Somi and Shingen both grew up in an environment where they experienced little to no familial love. It makes sense that she didn't realize it was her maternal instincts kicking in. One thing I didn't like, though , was how ptj made someone as strong as Shingen SULK over a defeat for 10+ years. Like, I know it was probably because of his decided fate, which led to him prioritizing fighting and meeting someone who can basically outdo him in the one thing he's supposed succeed at is shocking, but there could've been more depth. Like all that because he lost?!

Seeing Somi laying there bleeding out makes me realize how young she is. There was definitely a massive age gap in her marriage. She looks close to my age tbh, thinking about it now, she was mostly likely groomed into becoming a tool for her family to use for their sake.

Shintaro, girl, fuck you. Tf you mean "send you behind her", go follow your son instead.

Ptj, enough with the naked men😭

King of Busan looks like Taesoo 2.0. Let's just hope he didin't take after Gap in cheating, too.

I wonder if Gun came across Jinrang in prison?

[possamble]

do you think falin went on dates/potentially even hooked up with people periodically during those 4 years she and marcille were separated? i know you ascribe to has-been-pining-since-childhood falin (and tbh so do i), but i find it interesting that there were at least Two people interested in falin if we are to believe chilchuck's party relations chart. at the very least, she considered toshiro's proposal -- even if her intentions for doing so were rooted less in mutual interest and more in her fear of being alone -- and it makes me wonder if anyone else were to like... show interest in falin, what would the circumstances have to be for her to be an active participant/if she would've reciprocated if it was casual enough (because i can't see her getting into a serious relationship with anyone while she's still in love with marcille -- unless?)

i could see it going either way. girl who can't believe people could actually LIKE her that way because she struggles with liking herself (despite probably being the most beloved character in canon, though her ostracization in her hometown and the magic academy could explain why...... wait hold on i'M GETTING SIDETRACKED!!) vs. girl's first time being freed from an authority's expectations going a little wild at, well, a taste of freedom (plus a dose of delayed sexual awakening due to prior ostracization + "don't think of marcille like that don't think of marcille like that doN'T. DO NOT." double whammy)

idk idk idk! i find it SO interesting that she's so beloved in canon but is simultaneously very passive about it? i really love how a little creature explores what a more proactive falin could look like, and i'm super curious about your thoughts on what falin's love life would look like/if a love life would even exist decoupled from her newfound dragon instincts and marcille

honestly this is the one aspect im never sure about bc... i've seen other people establish that falin's gone and kissed or gotten involved with some of the other girls at the academy, or other adventurers. and i respect that! mostly bc it's a way of painting falin as more independent and mature than the canon material, and i can't knock that.

but i guess? idk. she was as clueless about shuro's feelings as laios was until he actually proposed to her. she also believed that she wouldn't get another proposal, so there's an element of her not realizing that she's particularly attractive. that, or she's... still somehow working by her hometown logic, which im assuming is the old "if you're not married by your teenage years you're considered a really bad marriage candidate for men" type thing, considering how much of a small town it was/the fact that she and laios already had marriages arranged from a young age.

an intensely auDHD woman, who has spent all of her independent life focusing on at least one person she was inseparably close to, not having had any romantic experience at the age of 23? that's very likely. personally i'd consider it more likely than the alternatives, but that's just my opinion lol

[lieutenantselnia]

Okay this is a bit of a different post, but I've been obsessed with this book for months and honestly, for me it was a one of a kind experience, and I feel like I just need to spread the word because it's terribly underrated and deserves so much more.

So, sometime last year, I came across the book "Alf" by Bruno Vogel - I don't even remember exactly how or where I found it, but my old interest in the early 20th century history somehow sparked up again a few months prior, so I probably stumbled upon it while researching about something related. It took a while until I got my hands on it, I really wanted a physical copy, but those seem hard to come by, so I eventually gave in and bought the e-book. The following paragraphs may contain spoilers, so if you want to experience the book without those, please stop here and go read it.

The book tells the story of Felix and Alf, two teenage boys growing up in Wilhelmine Germany at the dawn of World War I. They meet at Felix' new school after his family moved to a new city and quickly become friends, and not long after, lovers. It ends tragically for them though for them though, as the conventions of their time don't allow a relationship like theirs.

What got me so intrigued with this book other than being interested in the time period in general, was the fact that it is a vehemently anti-war and very openly queer story published in 1929. The story itself is fictional, but in parts inspired by the author's own background. Bruno Vogel, a gay man himself, was a volunteer in World War I, like so many other young men at the time, but the horrifying experiences that were so different from the glamorous stories told at home only made him become a firm pacifist. This book is almost 100 years old, but in my opinion it doesn't feel like that at all because so many of the topics that are talked about - and criticised - are still very much relevant today. That doesn't mean it's perfect, and of course you have to take into consideration that the author simply couldn't have all the knowledge we have today, but I think there were many books far less progressive published in later decades as well. Some of the topics are for example criticism of blind nationalism, the hypocrisy of religion (this was one where I could especially relate to the protagonist), sexuality and masturbation (in regard to the latter also heavy criticism of the shame and outright fear spread by religious authorities), homophobia (sexual acts between men were illegal at the time as per §175), among others. I think this quote I translated from the author's German Wikipedia page summarises it quite well:

"Alf is an anti-militaristic youth novel directed against the zeitgeist of the Weimar Republic, which gives expression to the unmitigated hatred of a pacifist against the authorities of any observance. It is the work of an opponent of war, and it is more: Alf fights against all regimentation, against that of conscience, conviction, religion, friendship and the body. Vogel castigates everything that has outraged him up to the time of writing: a petit-bourgeois, narrow-minded home, an obdurate school, religion and bourgeois morality."

Above the cover of the most recent publishing edition (also those that I own), with a photo of the author himself as a young soldier in World War I.

I absolutely love this book, and it also absolutely broke my heart. I already kind of knew what would happen as many online book stores basically already tell the ending in the description, but actually reading it in detail, and still hoping alongside the characters with every page even though I knew it was to no avail - to describe it in a way that fits the story, it felt like I was being stabbed with a bayonet right through the heart. I don't remember the last time a book made me cry this hard. I'm someone who sometimes struggles with showing emotional reactions like crying (even if I want to), but it just touched something deep inside me that made the dam break.

I absolutely recommend reading this book. It's tragic, but some parts also really made me laugh, and Felix and Alf are the sweetest. I already know I'll cry again, when I re-read it, and yet I can't wait. If you understand German, I'd definitely recommend reading the original. Also if you have the means to please buy the book from a store or lend from a library to show that there's interest in it because it's criminally underrated. However, there are also e-book versions to be found online in both German and English (e.g. on Anna's Archive). It's not a long read (barely 250 pages), and I really think it deserves more attention.

I could go on talking about this book and maybe I will in another post, but I'm finishing this one with the closing quote of the book as said/written by the protagonist Felix. I kid you not when I say this sentence alone is already brings tears to my eyes again:

»Ich will mitkämpfen gegen Bosheit und Dummheit, mithelfen, daß andere Menschen nicht, wie wir beide, aus Unwissenheit so Schweres durchmachen müssen. Das verspreche ich dir, Alf.« »I will join in the fight against evil and stupidity, I will do my part so that no one else is forced by ignorance to go through the hard times the two of us went through. I promise you that, Alf.«

[eisforeidolon]

In regards to that post [X]:

We could talk about the same old fallacies - OMG, Dean's siren is a guy! Yeah, a brother. OMG, Dean was supposed to say I love you in the Crypt scene! Yeah, it was removed and replaced with what the writer explicitly said was the less OOC version of what he meant anyway, "We're family". We could talk about the blatant absurdity of statements like "Dean liked men it happened on my screen" which bear no resemblance to the SPN that aired. But we've done that before and others have got this reiteration of it well covered.

So I wanna focus for the moment on this particular even more repulsive gem: "Like he literally doesn't need to verbally tell us he's bisexual we just know. He may not know but we do. This is an unmovable fact sorry."

It tells us a few things. One, this person is a fucking idiot. Two, this person, yet again, thinks that ~*interpreting*~ sexuality from the way someone looks/stands/makes eye contact/eats pastry/whatever numbnuts conspiracy bullshit you like? Is more valid than how a character identifies and is identified by those who created him. People can just look at you and know what your sexuality is better than you do, there's nothing repulsive about that idea at all! I've got a mountain of shiny pennies that says if Dean had literally never interacted with a man for the entire span of the series, they would have insisted it was because he was so afraid of how much he wanted to fuck them. There was no way the writers could have written Dean that someone like that would have accepted as actually heterosexual, because that's not what they personally wanted, so that's not what they were going to see.

I'm not saying there aren't things that might be said about how relatively questionable some of the gay jokes in SPN are, especially in the early years in terms of making queerness a punchline. But if we're going to talk about that? We need to do it not only in the cultural context of 2005 rather than 2023, but in the context of portrayals of real world men - and particularly those in fairly rural settings who aren't going to be particularly conscientious in the way they rib each other. Which becomes a whole other discussion about where to draw lines when you're writing fiction and dealing with things that might be realistic but also potentially offensive.

Furthermore, I'm not saying there aren't things that might be said about how SPN continually used romantic tropes for platonic relationships and how it's not entirely absurd for that to land different with the audience when the characters are not blood-related. Except that discussion needs to include not just how maybe the writers shouldn't have treated it as such a joke that a relationship between two male characters might have been possible, but also how fans should absolutely not have equated a relationship being theoretically possible with any specific relationship they wanted being owed to them. Especially in the context of those romantic tropes being used so so so much more between brothers all the fucking time setting the tone. As well as how it's not just problematic to treat the possibility of homosexual relationships as a joke, but problematic to insist literally any closeness between two male entities is gay, reinforcing all kinds of nasty toxic stereotypes about sexuality and masculinity which underlay a lot of modern adult men's issues with expressing their emotions and having genuinely close and open relationships outside of their romantic partners. I've seen fans wonder how heterosexual dudes can watch this show and love the brothers' relationship without seemingly noticing the weird undertones of how claustrophobically intertwined they are, and I think it's very much that when it comes to wanting a fantasy of platonic closeness, they're looking for realism as much as most women reading trashy romance novels are - but that's a whole other digression and this is already too long.

At the end of the day, not only was SPN not created in the cultural context of Very Online Tumbrites in 2023, convinced that nothing should ever be is heterosexual and every fictional story should be about them and what they want? The fact their ostensible original point misses is the real world and most other media of 2023 aren't like that either! Some of these shippers come across like they've literally never seen two adult male friends interact with each other or any actual love stories in media - and it's not just early 2000's television characters getting this treatment from entitled shippers who want to use representation as a weapon against creators as to why they're owed things they absolutely aren't.

[smytherines]

001| Curtwen and 002|Owen Carvour for the ask game

Oooohhh thank you!

001- curtwen

When I started shipping it: I watched Spies for the first time in late October or early November 2023, and I liked it but I didn't think about it again until January 2024 when I decided to rewatch it. The second time I watched Spies they broke my brain, and I've been here ever since

My thoughts: *45 continuous minutes of stressed out laughter* oh boy. Um. So many thoughts really, but most of them center around curtwen making me incredibly sad

What makes me happy about them: I genuinely believe they loved each other. That they bantered and bickered like an old married couple, but that they really tried the best they could to be together, even if most of the time they had to be apart. I believe Curt when he talks about how Owen was his best friend, and I think Owen felt the same way right up until the fall

What makes me sad about them: everything else

Things done in fanfic that annoy me: making pre-fall Owen into a heartless monster who is borderline (or just outright) abusive to a helpless, dopey babygirlified version of Curt. Those versions of the characters are unrecognizable to me

Things I look for in fanfic: for their relationship, whether working or romantic, to feel like an actual partnership with two people who genuinely care about each other. I'm also just a sucker for great banter

Who I'd be comfortable with them ending up with, if not each other: nobody, it's very much a "they were made for each other, do not subject anyone else to these men" situation for me

My happily ever after for them: actually I wrote a whole fic about this! But it would just be them getting out of the spy game and running off somewhere, just having a little house together and finally getting to have a real relationship

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: I think they switch it up. Maybe with Owen being the big spoon a little more often? I do think the fandom overlooks Curt's big spoon potential though

What is their favorite non-sexual activity: is it cheating to say spying? I think Curt would despise stakeouts at first because he can't keep still, but the more they work together (and especially once they get together) I think they would both start to kind of enjoy stakeouts because they get to talk and spend time together and not necessarily have all the pressure and stress of the other parts of their job

002- Owen Carvour

How I feel about this character: oh boy there aren't enough words. I could focus on so many things here, but they all come back to disability eventually. While Owen Carvour isn't established in canon to be disabled after the fall, in the real world you do not get up and walk away after a fall like that, especially not after a building explodes on you. In the real world, the most likely result would be broken bones, traumatic brain injury, spinal cord injury, burns from the explosion, etc. There aren't a ton of canonically disabled characters out there, so disability tends to be something that has to be read subtextually like this, often in the origin stories of antagonists or villains. The whole become disabled become evil trope.

I find myself with a lot of empathy for characters who go through something horrifying, something that would be disabling in the real world, and their grief and trauma manifest in horrifying ways. People who are not perfect victims, who spiral and lash out and lose themselves and ruminate, who turn their pain into ammunition. Grief that manifests as sadness and crying and self-hatred tends to be a lot more accessible and relatable than grief that manifests as boiling white hot rage. But as a disabled person who thinks of Owen as a disabled character, I have a lot of empathy for the rage. Maybe I shouldn't, but I do.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: just Agent Curt Mega

Non-romantic OTP: I love the idea of Barb and Owen being friends. I think they definitely had some interests in common and would've been such an interesting dynamic

Unpopular opinion of this character: I guess one of my most unpopular opinions is that I think it does a big disservice to the character and the story to reduce Owen down to a petty ex who was always sort of like that, who wants nothing else beyond petty personal revenge on the man who wronged him. To paint it as a toxic reaction to a bad breakup instead of a massive trauma that left him seriously injured and isolated and heartbroken, that stole his entire life from him.

I absolutely believe getting revenge on Curt was a primary motivation for Owen, but I don't think he planned to torture or kill Curt until Curt interrupted his arms deal. I think Owen lost his identity, his life, his job, his relationship, everything that mattered to him in the fall, and if Curt hadn't come back and chased him down, Owen would've been satisfied operating from the shadows and taking (from his perspective, at least) the only thing Curt actually loves- spying. But I don't think that's his only motivation. By the time we meet DMA, Owen has already been working with the Baron for some time, he definitely would've started this project before Curt ever came back, so I don't buy the idea that he started all this to lure Curt in. I think its giving Owen a bit too much credit to suggest he rigged the entire scenario. I don't think Curt personally being there was part of the plan, I think it derailed the plan.

A spy destroyed his life, him being a spy destroyed his life, his agency and his partner abandoned him to die, having a secret with another man ruined him. I get why he wants a world without agencies, without spies, without secrets. He is going to single handedly dismantle everything Curt ever believed in because those are the things Owen once believed in, the things that put him in that facility and led to him losing everything

It is about Curt, but its about a lot more than Curt too. I think Owen would be very aware of what the British government would do to him if they knew he was gay, I think he would be very aware that global superpowers like the US, UK, & USSR are working on surveillance technology, that someday soon somebody will hold all the world's secrets. I think he feels like he stands a better chance with Chimera than he does with the government that would imprison him or force him into "chemical castration" if they knew what he was. A government that left him for dead. His ideological reasons for joining Chimera as just as interesting to me as his personal reasons

One thing I wish had happened in canon: the villain monologue and the staircase scene have Owen laying out all his ideological reasons for doing what he's doing, beyond insulting Curt he doesn't get personal about anything, even when Curt tries to bring up personal things between them. I get why there wasn't, but I do sort of wish there had been a line or two that really expanded on what "the horror of staying alive" meant to Owen, some tiny glance at what his post-fall world was really like. Something that slips out and Curt tries to pull at that thread and Owen just shuts it down, or the thought of it makes him even angrier. Things end the same way, and I do think Joey Richter does an incredible, incredible job of making you feel something for Owen in the staircase scene, but I do wish we had a little bit more of a mask-dropping moment

My OTP: curtwen

My crossover ship: I would not inflict these men on anyone else

A headcanon fact: uhm. Shit. I've already typed so much so let's keep this simple- I headcanon him as autistic

[hellbeast-go-walkies]

Things I loved about Barry [SPOILERS]:

It seamlessly blends humorous and serious. No joke or dramatic moment felt like an afterthought, and heavy moments got to exist without someone trying to lighten the mood.

The pacing and use of sound/silence was amazing. I feel like I've seen so many shows and movies lately where we move from one scene to the next without any time to breathe, but this show just let moments or silence hang there without it feeling like the scene was dragging on.

Sally's character starts out like she's just going to be some pretty, blond love interest, but we got to see her angry and frustrated and violent and unhinged. For the majority of the show, she had bags under her eyes. She wasn't some love interest who fixed the violent man with her love. And even when she leaves her old life to go with Barry, we see how unhappy she is. There are no male fantasies with her character.

I could see Bill's stomach and his love handles through his shirt. I'm in no way calling him chubby or fat or treating those things as negative, but when you've had years of film and TV execs thinking all leading men have to be cut, I was so happy to see someone with an ounce of body fat.

There's zero copaganda. At best, the police in this show are incompetent, willing to believe anything in order to wrap up a case quickly, and at worst they're violent. And there's no blindly patriotic portrayal of the military either. This post and this post have some great points about propaganda and the finale.

The show does not glorify violence. Barry is not some cool action hero who carries out his work without emotion or consequence. And the show humanizes Barry without glorifying him or justifying his actions.

We get to see Barry cry, break down, beg for help, touch Fuches' hand, and say "I love you" to two father-figures. This show speaks on male violence as well as the need for deep, meaningful connection with others (and how that connection may prevent violence).

It's very ace-friendly.* Over the course of 32 episodes, there is like 4 overtly sexual/crude moments: a brief scene from a sex tape (which makes Barry uncomfortable), audio from a porno (which makes Barry REALLY uncomfortable), and Sally has two moments where a man she works with creepily and crudely hits on her.

Like, this is an HBO show. It could've been so much more sexual and violent, and it wasn't. There are graphic moments of violence, but there are also moments where the team chose a distant approach that worked perfectly. For example, one character is shot at close range in a car, and they chose to film that moment some distance from the vehicle. It was still a heavy, horrific moment, but it wasn't gratuitous.

*If you don't like swearing, violence, god-awful parenting, or stressful shows, you won't like Barry. It's the only comedy I've loved where I was just on edge for the rest of the day.

I have 4,000 more thoughts on this show, and I can't remember anything else I was going to add.

[yaminobean]

Welp, I'm doing this. It's my break and I've been a good responsible adult that's done their duty and I deserve a good old ramble.

So here goes:

We have two teenagers.

Frederick- a seventeen year old prince who's abusive family values gave him a cynical view of people. He's judgemental and quick to make sassy or snide comments about others. This has caused him to hurt someone and he's punished for it by being nearly assaulted, gaslit into believing that the abuse he's been suffering is all in his head, and had his worst fears confirmed with his family hating him and thinking him less than. His interest and mannerisms are seen as childish and naive. Readers reactions to Frederick were negative and even applauded the violence and misfortune being done to him. Even some of the characters in story mistreat him and don't think to much of how their treatment effects him.

Tomie- a fifteen year old girl that's know as the most beautiful girl in class. Every boy wants her and all the girls envy her. While she's know to be a knockout, she's also very petty, manipulative, and insults people. Her beauty catches the attention of her teacher and he takes advantage of Tomie. Tomie is smitten with him and decides to get his attention by telling him that she might be pregnant. He is enraged and so is her boyfriend. Their argument ends with Tomie being pushed by her teacher off a cliff and to her death.

In front of her class.

Instead of shock and students calling the police, The students express joy at Tomie being dead. The girls believe she got what she deserved and the boys blamed her for the teacher's murderous behavior. The teacher convinces his students to help him cut up her body and bury it in several different places.

What they have in common: These characters are victims of abuse. Tomie is being abused by her teacher and possibly who knows who else. Her behavior indicates that she isn't unfamiliar with responding to adults sexually desiring her so she acts in accordance with their responses, meaning that Tomie has been SA and is used to it. Frederick has been physically abused by bullies and mentally and emotionally abused by his father and, by extension, his brothers.

Both characters play into and believe the perceptions that people have placed on them. For Frederick, the abuse is so common that he actually now believes his family's perception of him and acts in accordance with that perception, leading to low self esteem and self destructive tendencies. Tomie is seen as just a bratty and selfish girl by most of her peers and a seductress by most of the men she interacts with. After her death, she plays up those perceptions to a thousand and becomes a monstrous force to be reckoned with. Both have their complexities ignored by their peers; people around them seem to show disdain when both these characters show that these characters are more than what they've been dictated by.

Both characters know people's expectations of them and tailor themselves to them as a way of survival. Tomie is a more extreme case. While Frederick has used his people reading skills to hide as a way of survival, Tomie uses her people reading abilities to manipulate and get others to do what she wants.

Since their both young, their handling of their skills is amateur and often leads them to mistakes.

When I realized this, it lead the old angst wheels to turn. If the cards were played right, Frederick could have possibly become Tomie or would have been a survivor of a Tomie encounter. It's interesting that in a more grim Au, we'd see Frederick, who ends up dying in the dungeon, come back as a vengeful yokai who'd most likely end the Plaid kingdom reign by coming after each Plaid family member one by one.

Hooo. Glad that's out.

I got this idea from a deep dive video someone did of Tomie and found it's discussions on victim blaming fascinating. Give it a look and maybe subscribe.

[mermaidsirennikita]

a while ago i remember you talking about books that felt more like adult fantasy but the writers were probably pushed into ya because it's more marketable, would you say the revrse in happening nowadays or is it still happening?

I still hear about authors who say that their agents ask them if an adult fantasy concept could be aged down for YA, so I think that's happening, but probably not as much as it once did.

I also think that a lot of younger authors are living in a world in which YA fantasy is still king—and for A TEENY fraction of authors, it still is, right? I know of a couple YA fantasy authors who got BIG advances (and good for them, but damn they were huge). But they are very much in the minority there. However, when you're working on your draft, when your agent is shopping your MS, it's easy to get big dreams about how huge your book is gonna be. And it's also easy to twist that into something where it's like, if you don't get it you've been overlooked or betrayed or lost or are they outlier, when in fact you're in the minority in that you got a pub deal, and you're in the majority in that your deal isn't anything mindblowing. This isn't a "your lucky to even be tradpubbed" take, because I also think that putting tradpub on a pedestal helps no one. It's just how I see it.

THAT BEING SAID... I do think that because YA sales are still more trad-dependent than, say, romance (not a lot of teens have their own KU accounts, I imagine) this leads to the toxic idea that there's this AMAZING WORLD where your YA Fantasy makes you famous, and if it doesn't you've lost, and it leads to authors still conforming to the YA is King mentality and producing an MS that would probably work a lot better for adults while selling it as a teen thing.

I can think of one book that I will not name—I respect the author. I tried to read it recently. That book would have worked a lot better as an adult fantasy novel, to me. The heroine was supposed to be this big, heavy, powerful character, and her being the age she was, and her issues and the violence of it all being directed towards teens versus adults (and teens can read adult books and adults can read YA, let's be clear, I'm talking categories and character ages, etc here) felt weird.

I will also add—the character in that book ended up in a poly relationship. I did not find that super well-explored for the two men, personally. But I do have high standards on that front. And I've gotta say; it's not that teens and The Youths can't have poly relationships. But "poly" is not a sexual orientation or gender identity, and I find that sometimes saying "poly rep"... it's true! But it's not "rep" in the same way as "queer rep" is "rep", as "BIPOC rep" is rep. Because to be in a polyamorous relationship is to make a decision, right? You grow into and work into being able to have a functional poly relationship. It takes a special type of person and it takes a lot of WORK, and I frankly don't buy that anyone in their early twenties or below can do that work lmao.

Which doesn't mean they won't try, but when it's in a YA novel—I have NO problem with teens reading it. I'm just kind of like "REALLY. REALLY. A LONG-TERM POLY COMMITMENT BETWEEN 18 YEAR OLDS. SURE JAN." Like, come on. I respect poly relationships, I know poly people, TRUST ME. I think a solid poly relationship is probably one of the most stable types of relationships out there. But holy shit. Trying to sell me on people that young making it work and that being meant to be for them just feels like... WHY WASN'T THIS ADULT???

And hey, I'll say—as I write this, I know that I I love Sierra Simone's Thornchapel series, where there's an MMF relationship between people in their early twenties. BUT THAT RELATIONSHIP... lmao. The way in which the HEA was achieved speaks to how aware Sierra was that these people were MESSED. UP. Same with Lyonesse, which involves Isolde in her early twenties. If we're going to those spaces, we aren't in YA territory. Or even CLOSE.

I think there's still this idea that YA fantasy is more dignified than fantasy romance, and I think that comes from a certain type of YA author and I think it's toxic as hell and untrue. But yeah, I still think some of them are encouraged to age down or choose to, for practical or personal or market reasons.

Then again, I think a book like Road of Bones would've been made a YA novel ten years ago, and it's not, so YAY!

[vintage-bentley]

Fandom gripe: I stopped reading fanfic for GO because of the amount of gender and kink (usually untagged) there was and Crowley being OOC in almost everything to be this super flamboyant genderfuck being and haven't really been involved in fanfic/fandom until getting into Arcane recently. I feel a little silly for hoping it was just the GO fandom being intolerable after years of NG's pandering on tumblr but omg, it's so much worse than I thought. My favourite Arcane character has been trans so excessively it's in the top "additional tags" filter bar for his character and it feels like every other fic has him being a shitty, apathetic "asexual who loves sex" but who is also majorly into BDSM for some reason?? I'm so done with fandom at this point. The hettie "kweers" were never good at writing gay characters or ships to begin with but at least they used to try. Those days seem long gone across fandoms now. I've been avoiding reading for my Arcane OTP lesbian ship because of the actual dread of how much magical real dick strap and abuse there is going to be. Even trying to read something soft and fluffy for them made me cringe because of how unavoidably heterosexual it was.

YES ALL OF THIS 😭

I gave up on fanfiction too for the same reasons. With GO, the characters are always horribly OOC and for some reason super kinky despite being old men who can barely even brush hands without blushing?

I still don’t understand where everyone got the idea that Crowley is a super flamboyant gendie. He’s literally just not that. It’s like they have an idea of what they want him to be, so they just wrote that instead of writing the actual character. Looking at fandom-made Crowley and canon Crowley is like looking at two different characters. Same with Aziraphale. And I’ve said it before, but at that point…what’s the point of even writing about these particular characters? If you’re going to change them so drastically, clearly you don’t give a shit about exploring the actual character, so why not just make OCs?

Sorry to hear about your favourite character 😭 I think that’s pretty standard for fandom at this point. It’s just a bunch of straight people (or maybe also bi people who have a weird complex about “not being queer enough” whatever that means) who think that tumblr sexualities and gender identities are a personality that make them and the characters they write interesting and Special.

I don’t even bother looking up lesbian ships because it would honestly hurt me too much to see the magic dick bullshit. It hurts enough already to see M/M couples be heterosexualised…but with F/F couples it’s just that much more personal.

I keep saying it, but my theory is that these OSA writers started out with the whole “uwu gay ships are so wrong and dirty and sinful, I’m so bad for writing them!” Attitude. So they kind of tried to make their fics good, and although there was always heterosexual dynamics that seeped in they still managed to at least not make it too obvious. Because the whole “sinful” thing was enough to make them feel Rebellious Cool And Special. But now that homosexuality has gained so much social acceptance, it’s no longer “bad” to like gay ships. So now they have to tack on all this kweer shit to once again feel like they’re rebelling against their parents or whatever. I just wish they’d admit that instead of claiming to be gay themselves and calling actual gays Kweerphobic for thinking they’re full of shit.

[violsva]

September Reading

Recent: Mostly fanfic, but I did finish Blake's Songs of Innocence and of Experience, and had a bunch of thoughts. I don't think there was much attention paid to the order of the poems when I studied some of them in university, and that felt very relevant when actually reading the whole thing. (Although he did change the order occasionally, so.)

Tried and didn't get anywhere with a bunch of things, which is frustrating but I suppose to be expected right now.

Current: Randall Munroe's How To: Absurd Scientific Advice for Common Real-World Problems, which is sitting in the kitchen and gets picked up whenever I'm waiting for my tea to steep. More comfort rereading.

Started Biggles Buries a Hatchet, but it's set in, or at least near, a gulag so it's not going very fast.

Did a lot of reading in Unmarriages: Women, Men, and Sexual Unions in the Middle Ages at the library, which has been great. Oh, and I read two academic articles, on Rapa Nui history as indicated by genetics and palaeolithic textiles. I miss my pensive citadels.

I'm flipping through a lot of craft books, usually ones I've read before or at least by familiar authors, and those probably won't go in the books file but they're very relaxing.

Also, mom went through the some of the old newspapers in the kitchen, which means I dug out (and then immediately spilled tea on) two magazines I'd been reading and maybe I will get back into those.

Future: I gave My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness back to the library early August when it became clear I wasn't going to finish it then, but I just picked up the hold again today.

I need to reread a certain Victorian horror novella for exchange reasons, so probably Thursday I will sit down and do that and make notes.

And then I've got a fantasy novel with a trope that is Exactly my thing on Libby, but we'll see how that goes. And if it doesn't, I got Swordheart by T. Kingfisher for my birthday yesterday so I can reread that.