#(also i realized i got some of her choices wrong haha)

[hollowtones]

what'd you think about jade shadows?

I put it under a read-more because I don't know how to talk about this without talking about spoiler stuff. The tl;dr is "I liked it but I wish there was a little bit more."

One of the things I didn't like isn't even really part of the quest itself, but I saw a mutual bring it up a few days ago & it's been on my mind since: it feels a little odd to have a content warning before your sidequest, and then not give you any way to skip the quest if it's content you don't think you'd be able to handle. Especially given there's a whole event & rewards that only unlock afterwards!!

OK on to the contents of the quest itself. There's a lot of themes of love and connection and empathy in the face of systemic cruelty or indifference, in this game in general, and a lot of how that manifests is stories about characters fighting for self-determination and agency (the Ostrons trying to stay free of the Grineer, the Solaris trying to destroy the systems that keep them in debt & deny them bodily autonomy, Umbra, the Tenno, the Lotus, etc etc).

I think it's interesting to try and explore a tragedy where we aren't able to help someone in time, where the powers that be have brutalized someone and we as individuals aren't able to get there in the nick of time & help them claw their agency back. I think it's an interesting thematic & emotional through-line (with very strong parallels to Ordis... very smart choice to make him the event vendor / narrator, I'm feasting good on all the new dialogue LOL), and I think there have been enough well-written woman characters in the game that don't get written out or killed for the sake of some man's tragedy or growth that I don't immediately roll my eyes about them trying a So Sad The Woman Dies story.

I do also think this would have hit harder if we got more information about Jade herself!! I realize "this woman broke a law and was completely dehumanized / made into a Thing by the empire, stripping her of herself to suit their ends" is Kind Of The Point, and they make enough of a fuss about "wow there's a lot that's redacted about her history, huh!" that I assume this is a plot thread they're leaving hanging for later. But I feel like the big moment would have resonated better if they gave us a little more info to establish this character, other than "she was heterosexual" and "the Orokin were fucked up, don't forget" haha.

(I do find it funny that the storyline about Ballas, who got Divorced So Badly that he Caused Nearly All Of Today's Problems, is all wrapped up, but the story keeps going "no no, don't worry, there's still plenty of opportunity to remind you how fucked the Orokin were." Here's these two people that broke some insipid law about conceiving a child & so their bosses and leaders broke their brains and turned them into bio-weapon lapdogs as punishment. Every time they go "BTW Something Was Deeply Wrong With The Orokin & We Still Feel The Aftershock Of That Today" I clap my hands like a seal.)

Warframe Babies Are Born!!!!! This little tyke is fuckin weird. What's their problem. I think it's weird and cool. I don't really feel much about "this character is a parent now!" type of storylines. (I did pop off when Stalker got to do his shithead honourable samurai defending a child with one arm thing. I'm a sucker for that & they made it coooooool. It feels like they're setting up some kind of "Lone Wolf and Cub" situation. The scythe being juiced up with BabysPower was also funny.) The baby thing is neat to me from the perspective of, like... This is something weird and new that's never happened before in this universe. That's exciting and kind of scary! I'm interested to see where they go with that. (Presumably in a year or two. Very funny to drop this on us when a completely different major story arc is right around the corner with 1999.)

Gianni's delivery was fuckin killer. I'm excited for whatever next arc they do with Stalker if it means they're gonna pay my boy to grunt and yell and scream more. It feels very strange to be acquainted with two people who've done voice acting in "Warframe" now. Me next? ^_^

I like our new Corpus weirdo. I hope she comes back. Fun to get more stuff with the Sisters of Parvos & with Mr. Granum himself. But I liked her a lot. It got a fuckin laugh out of me to have her through all the quest excited about her big promotion that she's going to get & resolving that with "Is that a fuckin baby??? Fuuuuuck! They don't pay me enough to shoot a baby with a gatling gun!" I wish her ending scene was a little more than just stoically standing aside but literally anything else I can think of feels way too cheesy or on-the-nose.

The facial animations on the Operator were really fuckin weird. I just remembered that. I thought that was just a thing on my end but I watched someone else play & the faces looked weird for them too.

Hunhow's a good inclusion. I like him seeing the Stalker stewing in his own misery because he hates the only people that could offer him help & going "aw man, c'mon buster, don't be like me now." I like his signature that he puts in his emails. I like that he's still an emotionally constipated weirdo that hates us but is still endeared to us in some way. (They make nods to The New Strange in his ending email, which makes sense given that this also feels like a quest setting up More Weird Shit In The Future, but I do get a laugh that it also reads as "JADE WAS PREGNANT? OKAY... WELL. DON'T FORGET THAT I HAVE A WOMB TOO, KID." Thanks Grandpa. Love you too Grandpa. Thanks for the sweeties Grandpa.)

The event quest feels like a nice bow on top. I like the parallels between Jade and Ordis. Wanting to afford her the dignity in death he could never be given. Acknowledgement of Ordan Karris is fun!!! (The line about him being conflicted with the thought of Granum un-cephalon'ing him has me rubbing my hands together.) I'm excited that we're getting so much of Parvos Granum lately. What a shit head. It's funny to see him so hyped up about Ordan. "Duuuude! Your history's famous killer!! That's awesome? Do you wanna work for me? C'monnnnn we both hate the legacy of the Orokin. Wouldn't it be awesome if MY rule was the one dehumanizing you and wielding you as a weapon instead?" This is something they've been establishing as early as "Parvos and Ballas in bed with one another doing shady back-room deals over a Warframe bodyguard and specter particle research" but it's fun whenever they sow the seeds of Parvos being so much like the Orokin he hated.

I wrote more than I thought I was going to!!! I like the thematic through-line idea of this quest but I wish they executed on it better. I like the stuff this is presumably establishing for the future. I really like the event quest as... not quite an epilogue, I guess, but as an addition. Other than that I thought it was okay! I wasn't expecting anywhere near the level of Whispers in the Walls, but that quest being such a high bar makes a "pretty okay" quest stick out to me a little, haha.

[hebimoonlightwrites]

hc for Yandere! Leona with fem darling? I hear that despite his grumpy behavior he really respect ladies (it was said several times and also mentioned in one of Cater's vignette, I think??) So I feel like he would be pretty much soft yandere, but what do you think? thank!!

Writer's corner: Oh yess! It's said in one of Cater's vignette- the one with the painting of the lady haha, if I'm not wrong. Also of course you can get some headcanons with our hot dear Leona in yandere mode! I hope you'll enjoy reading them! Please, let me know if there's something you want me to fix, so I can do it for you! Enjoy, sweetheart!♥

mc's pronouns: SHE/HER

Warnings: soft Yandere content here! (NOTHING VIOLENT MENTIONED- BUT I STILL DON'T SUPPORT VIOLENCE!!)

⭐𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐋𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐚⭐

⭐As anon said, Leona is known to be such a lazy (and hot) housewarden

⭐but even if he's a lazy, grumpy lion, well..

⭐He can be pretty dangerous and strong..

⭐Especially when it comes to challenges or goals.

⭐If he wants something or someone..

⭐... then he'd be sure to obtain it!

⭐One day Leona was napping in the botanical garden.

⭐He had just skipped classes, as usual, and was hiding there to take a nap, behaving lazily.

⭐That's when he met mc while she was humming and taking care of some plants for her potionology test.

⭐Generally Leona would growl in response only to scare whoever would disturb him while he's taking his nap..

⭐But as his green prideful and lazy- but charming- eyes met mc's figure..

⭐As he realized mc was a woman...

⭐..that she was a very beautiful one..

⭐.. Well..

⭐He raised one of his eyebrows and smirked slightly, clearly being smitten by her beauty.

⭐Of course he introduced himself..

⭐He'd be that prideful and confident to introduce himself, treating mc the best he could..

⭐Remember that Leona is from Sunset Savanna and that his homeland is known to be respectful of women.

⭐Since he respects women that much, Leona wouldn't be an aggressive or violent Yandere boyfriend...

⭐..But this doesn't mean he wouldn't be with all the boys who'd try to approach or even greet his lady.

⭐In my opionion Leona would be jealous like... a lot!

⭐Because if we think about it, Leona has always been compared to his older brother by everyone..

⭐So he kinda hates being the second choice and in his yandere version he would be scared of being rejected by the person who got his interest.

⭐And if this person- in this case, this girl- was smart enough, she'd notice how unconfident Leona actually is behind that prideful look of his..

⭐Otherwise, she wouldn't understand why he's behaving that jealously...

⭐He would never try to hurt mc- like NEVER..

⭐Instead he'd protect her and prove her that he's strong.. that he's worth it- even if deep inside he's unsure about himself, though.

⭐So yeah, anon is right: he'd be a soft yandere, unconfident and cuddly, especially!

⭐He'd be so clingy, especially when they both are alone.

⭐I can picture him taking his usual nap while laying his head on mc's lap.

⭐If she tried to move even for an inch, he'd growl in the sleep and, still keeping his eyes closed, he'd take her hand only to put it on his hair or ears too:

⭐"Don't you dare to move away...to leave me... You know you shouldn't bother the sleeping lion..."

©hebimoonlightwrites_tumblr Please, do not copy my contents nor repost it without my permission.

[fireemblems24]

Scarlet Blaze Ch 11

Sorry this is taking forever, but here's ch 11.

MAIN STORY

Oh, shit, do we have to fight Gilbert next? AND ANNETTE? This suuukkkkks. It especially sucks since you know they didn't have a choice but to risk their lives just defending themselves.

Annette is so precious. Fuck. I don't want to fight her.

Gilbert being a good daddy though 😭😭😭😭

At least CF was entertaining. SB is a giant snoozefest where I have to kill all my favorites.

Man, they all sound like psychopaths. They're all super excited to go kill people who are just defending themselves. Even Dorothea's only worried about marriage.

MAP/SIDE STUFF

Shez just said that everyone who gets killed in the war "is standing in our way." Imagine comparing self-defense to "getting in our way." Yikes for that characterization compared to how concerned GW!Shez is about Claude's aggressive decisions.

Lamo, Mercedes is like wtf am I doing here fighting the Kingdom and Annie? 

Aww, Marianne (and Dorothea) are like the only two who realize they're fighting other people and not just being all murder happy like the rest. 

Dimitri just got put on par with Holst and Caspars dad by Balthis, kind of, unofficially best Kingdom warrior? 

We're addressing the Ferdinand and Hubert subplot again. Which is good. It's by far the most interesting part of SB. Though, it's just a repeat of what we've seen from it before.

Ok, they're adding some different stuff which is interesting. Bringing up that even if Fredie's dad tried to retire and stay out of Edelgard's way, that he would still have to die because of what he symbolizes. Hubert and Ferdinand disagree on whether people like Mr. Aegir can get a second chance (as in, can you when you've become a symbol).

This is especially interesting to me in regards to what happens to Rhea, Dimitri, and Claude if they surrender to Edelgard and become her puppets. Basically, Hubert is saying that, no matter what, they'd have to die because anyone who would rebel would use (fill in here) as a symbol of their resistance. Claude may be the sole exception here because he can scoot off to Almyra, but it's very obvious that Rhea and Dimitri (and their staunch allies) are fighting for their lives, because even if we're generous and say Edelgard would spare them and give them life worth living (i.e. not locked up), Hubert would most certainly have them assassinated.

Which also brings up another point. People always talk about how it's wrong/bad for Dimitri to try and spare Edelgard at the end of AM because what kind of life would she live? But always praise Edelgard for trying to spare Rhea towards the end of CF but no one - not a single soul - asks what kind of life would Rhea live? I gotta make my own post about that.

SB is really gonna be - kill yo dad, the route. Ironic since I played this the day after Father's Day.

I have to fight Sylvain 😭

SHEZ & MANUELA A SUPPORT

Manuela is flirting with Shez lol. He said he liked her voice and she pushed him with like "is that all" until he talked about her looks lamo

Aww, Shez actually likes her hungover side. Saying he likes warrior her, singer her, healer her, and drunk her. That's kinda cute, actually

Shez said that he can't keep his eyes off her. Laying it on a bit thick. And said she's more attractive now than she was younger haha.

Yeah, Shez, I have no idea how she was supposed to see that in any other way lol.

HUBERT & LYSITHEA B SUPPORT

Hubert finds Lysithea studying at night and teases her about ghosts. She runs away.

The Imperial Army is a bunch of children who don't want to eat their veggies. This is 100% cannon. Hubert orders guards to sneak them into soups for the soldiers actually get their veggies. I cannot. (though, imagine the privilege, Faerghus could never)

Lysithea freaks out because she ate veggies.

Veggies are legitimately delicious though. I don't know what the Imperial Army's problem is.

EDELGARD & MONICA A SUPPORT

Guys, I'm so excited. A Monica support. I wonder what she'll talk about.

Monica counts how many times Edelgard worried about her and invited her to tea. I just . . . no.

This support was pure cringe.

I love how "Kingdom bad" because they're willing to die to defend their homes, family, friends, and everything and anything else they've loved from invaders, but Monica is to be admired because she's oh so loyal to Edelgard that even in when Edelgard leaves her for dead, it's a happy moment for Monica because it helps Edelgard's cause. Like . . . double standard much?

PETRA & CONSTANCE C SUPPORT

Constance is something else. She confronts Petra because Petra's dad invaded and it led to the demise of Constance's everything.

I enjoy supports that address conflict, but girl, that was not Petra's fault. Don't take it out on her.

Oh, good, she's not. She recognizes that Petra's people suffered, and that neither of them were involved, so there's no bad blood.

Then she hahahas and leaves. Lamo, this made me love Constance.

Petra doesn't get a chance to say she agrees and seeks out Constance, but finds her in the sunlight, and needlessly to say, is very confused.

MAIN BATTLE

Hubert and Edelgard just said submit or die.

Wow, Linhardt is like I wish the nobles would think about all the people who they're forcing to fight. The lack of self-awareness is astounding.

Ferdinand can join the "lack of self-awareness club" for acting like it's the Kingdom causing the violence.

Baron Dominic opened the gate, risking his defenses to rescue soldiers. Hubert judged him. But we're supposedly the good guys. I swear the writing goes out of it's way to make the Kingdom look good.

Fuck. I have to fight Gustave :( He dead :( Poor Annette.

FUCK. Now I have to fight Annette.

Fuck this route. Ingrid, Rodrigue, Gustave, and now Annette - all dead.

Even Baron Dominic's death is making me sad. None of the Empire generals get this kind of humanization when they die lol.

Edelgard and Hubert sound insane. Edelgard's acting like their deaths were inevitable because of their lineage (when they would've been just fine if not for her actions), and Hubert's like he's happy to die so it doesn't matter. What a bunch of looney tunes.

Edelgard just said whoever wins gets to decide what's right. I mean, victors do write the history but yikes at the implications.

So deep - "we're up against the world itself." Sounds like a teenage edge-lord wrote this lamo.

We got crusher. Joy. Did they pry it out of Annette's dead hands?

Oh, joy, more backtracking. Revolts in the Empire. I thought we were out of the backtracking era and into kill every Blue Lion era.

xxxx

[slayerkitty]

2023 in Review: Meta Edition

So I got tagged to do a moth-by-month meta review by a few people - @chickenstrangers, @lurkingshan, and @ranchthoughts. I wasn't sure I had enough meta or posts, but then I remembered Only Friends...

So I figured, why not?

January/February

No meta from me yet - was still lurking/starting to poke my head out and interact a little.

March

My Favorite/Most Popular: Dome is Jesus! So I've long said that my first BL meta was for La Pluie, and that's true. However, my first meta since I started watching Thai dramas was for Midnight Museum (which is, technically, not a BL). Thus we have my Dome is Jesus meta. And I don't think I was wrong? But he was also way more than that, lol.

April

My Favorite/Most Popular: Dome is one of the four Horseman of the Apocalypse. Midnight Museum season 2 WHEN?

May

No meta this month.

June

My Favorite/Most Popular: Dream loves Nara. HAHA, my first La Pluie/BL meta and it's about the GL side couple. Dream wore that red 'N' right over her heart on that sweater and since I've been to the @respectthepetty school of color, I noticed it right away. AND I WAS RIGHT.

July

My Favorite/Most Popular: Turtle Tai. My La Pluie meta where I over identify with Tai for several paragraphs. I have no idea if it helped others who were struggling with Tai get a better understanding of where he was coming from emotionally, but writing it was cathartic and I'm so glad @lurkingshan poked at me and said I should write it.

August

Most Popular: Let's Talk About Trust, Baby. One of my first Only Friends metas from early on, when the show was absolutely eating my brain. I had a lot of fun breaking down the trust dynamics of the characters.

My Favorite: Baby, Let's Try. My breakdown of the Let's Try OST MV (and Only Friends BTS videos) analyzing the different framing devices and effects used and what it might be saying regarding our larger group discussions on ephemerality in regard to the show. When I watched this MV and realized what was happening, I had to drop everything and write out meta and that was so much fun.

September

Most Popular: Narrative Frameworks in Only Friends (post episode 4). I ended up doing this weekly and it was so fascinating... until the frameworks went away. Why, P'Jojo?

My Favorite: Working with @jenyifer to figure out the story of the Only Friends end cards for each episode. It finally put the mystery of those moments to rest and figuring out where they originated or where they fight in the chronology of the show really added some depth to certain moments.

October

My Favorite/Most Popular: With the dramatics and exhausting reveals of the Red Peafowl casting announcements, I loved my reaction: Let's Just Stan the Fucking Bird. @blmpff mentioned fan club memberships and the Featherheads were born.

November

My Favorite/Most Popular: (Stages of) Grief in Last Twilight. I wanted to explore where Day and Mhok were with the grieving process. My only Last Twilight meta (so far?).

December

My Favorite/Most Popular: Narrative Choices in For Him the series.

Honorable Mention: my most noted post of the year, lmao, but not a meta - my second Pit Babe is trending post.

Look at me, I got all wordy from July through November, LOL. Here's hoping for more meta and more brain rotting BLs in 2024.

Not tagging anyone, but if you see this and you wanna do it, consider yourself tagged!!

[bluegekk0]

Hello! I’m quite new here and have done some reading up, but is there anywhere that explains what the AU is about / could you explain? Only if you don’t mind of course. (I love learning about others’ AUs.)

Also: -pokes PK’s belly-

oh absolutely! be prepared though, this is going to be a long one. also an important note: i can't write, so i haven't written any fics about this, which means many details can change/develop over time as it's something i think about 24/7, but i'll try to write down what i currently have in mind and what i'm more or less confident with

so the gist of the au is that pk went into hibernation in the dream realm, as opposed to dying as he (presumably) does in canon, and then moved to dirtmouth with hornet and hollow. but there's many aspects of the au that trace way back into his past, so i'll go over those first if you want to learn more. i will put a "keep reading" divider here cause it's going to be quite long haha

pk was always an outcast among other wyrms, he was born a runt and had no physical strength for playfighting with the other hatchlings, for which he was often mocked. instead, he preferred to quietly observe and study things, which is how he got interested in mortal bugs. yes, they were food, wyrms are a carnivorous species after all, but he felt it was wrong to treat them as just fodder, like the other members of his kind did. he wanted to create, not destroy, and he wanted to share it with the mortals, as he saw parts of himself in them and wanted to help them reach their full potential

wyrms as a species were highly territorial, so that and the fact that they could reproduce in litters and increase their population numbers ended up being their downfall, as their constant fights over territory became more and more violent, causing them to start killing each other much more frequently. this constant aggression caused their numbers to decrease over time, and eventually they disappeared. that is when pk decided to claim the territory that later became hallownest as his own, and abandoned his form in favor of something more approachable. he met the white lady, married her, and granted the most intelligent bugs in hallownest sapience, leading to the creation of the kingdom

it didn't take long until the cracks began to show. he wasn't used to getting this much attention, so when the bugs started worshiping him, he began hiding in his workshop, away from everyone, having doubts about his self-worth and whether he can live up to those expectations. alas, the worship he received lead to the moths abandoning the radiance, and the start of the infection. he promised himself he wouldn't fail the kingdom, and so he started looking for ways to stop it, eventually deciding on the vessel plan. he's always had doubts about it, but it was his last resort and he didn't have much time, so he had to try. and thus hollow was born, the vessel that was able to climb up the abyss, proving their strength and claiming the title of the hollow knight. unfortunately for pk, as much as he kept reminding himself that the vessels had no emotion or thought, that they weren't supposed to be children, the truth is that he got attached, as his parental instincts told him to do. with this realization, came intense guilt about all of the vessels, something which would haunt him from that point on, made even worse with the cryptic signs he saw in his dreams warning him of hallownest's downfall (this is how his foresight ability works in my au)

but he had to proceed with the plan, he had no other choice, and that prompted the bargain with herrah and the birth of hornet. he immediately got attached, all his instincts which he had to repress with hollow have finally found an outlet. hornet became the light of his life, and they grew extremely close, especially after herrah went to sleep, as pk made sure to be here for her at all times, taking the role of both her father and mother (and going as far as killing and decapitating xero in a blind feral rage when he threatened her). unfortunately, all the guilt about the vessels led to him and the white lady separating down the line, as even just looking at each other caused both of them immense pain. so after that, and after hollow was sealed in the temple of the black egg, it was just him and hornet, which made their bond even stronger as they were the only family each of them had left

but as we know, the plan failed, and the infection returned. this caused pk to completely break down, all his fears and guilt piling up, making him unable to do anything. he wouldn't leave his palace room, he wouldn't do his duties as the king, he was as good as dead. hornet was away at the hive at the time, training with queen vespa and her knights, so she wasn't there when pk's breakdown lead to his disappearance, although she noticed there was something bothering him long before that, he just never talked about it with her. she was shocked to learn that he was gone, and after a period of blaming herself for not being there for him, she grew bitter and angry about the fact that he left her all alone with no word

the reason for his disappearance was hibernation. this is a process that is extremely rare among wyrms, as it's caused by intense distress and fracturing of the mind, and for such a violent species, death often comes way before that point. it's essentially a rebirth, a complete reset of their mind and memories that allows them to continue. in the case of pk, this process was interrupted by ghost, which caused him to lose all of his powers. no powers meant that he wasn't able to sustain himself with soul, and had to find actual food, so he left the white palace behind in the dream realm (while he was able to exit it, he had no means of entering it again) and spent the next few weeks running around hallownest and surviving off of tiktiks and other non-sapient bugs. he wanted to be forgotten, so he avoided any interaction with bugs who still lived there (as a side note, i quite like the idea of him defacing statues of himself, in an effort to make them unrecognizable and to show that he never deserved them in the first place. so you'd find old statues of the pale king with their faces scratched away or horns broken off, and any king's idols you'd encounter would be shattered into pieces)

hornet was not aware that her father was back until she heard zote's panicked warning about a "white monster with a crown who killed and ate bugs" after he ran into pk in greenpath. she had to go and check herself, as she had a feeling the description matched someone she had known before, and she was correct. after stumbling upon pk in greenpath, and following a brief angry exchange, she decided to take him with her to dirtmouth, where he met hollow. seeing hollow forgive their father made hornet realize that she also wants to give him a second chance, as despite her anger, she did miss him a lot

this is also where grimm comes into play, as he and his troupe remained in dirtmouth after the ritual was interrupted by ghost's disappearance in godhome. grimm and pk met years ago, not long after the kingdom was first created, and over time became close friends, which evolved into something more, though neither of them admitted it at the time. their reunion in dirtmouth caused all of those feelings to spark up again, leading to them starting a relationship

all of the sins of the past still greatly affect pk. his fear of failure makes him terrified of making even the smallest mistakes, he's prone to panicking and apologizing for even the most insignificant matters, and he's frequently haunted by nightmares of the vessels, his failure to save the kingdom and all the pain he caused his family. then there's the more feral side of him, something which he tried to repress while he was a king, and now embraces as part of his new life (he is cringe but he is free...). moreover, he's ashamed of his mistakes, and refuses to let anyone call him "the pale king", choosing to go by the name "wyrm" instead. he's grateful for the second chance he was given, he wants to do better and be a good father, especially to hollow, but he's still emotionally broken. hornet's anger with him sours their relationship and makes it much more difficult for them to get as close as they used to, but i definitely see it improving over time, as they still love each other dearly, there's just a lot of emotional baggage both of them have to deal with first

i think that's basically it for the backbone of the au, it all leads to the point i'm at now: exploring the character dynamics, thinking of where they're going to go next, introducing more side characters (i still want to include quirrel, just thinking about his potential design and how he's going to fit in), making up silly non-canon scenarios, and so on. i want to eventually make a doc file, or something of that sort, detailing each character and the au in general. i picture it as kind of like fandom wiki articles, with personality descriptions, backstories and relationships included, just to keep it all neatly organized (and maybe suitable to share in public haha)

i apologize if this is all hard to get through, i tend to ramble quite a lot and, again, i'm not good at writing, so this is closer to an incoherent mess than an actual story overview, but i hope it's somewhat enjoyable to read. do feel free to ask any questions if you want to learn more! i always enjoy responding to them, plus it helps painting a clearer, more consistent picture of the au in my head :)

[ahundredtimesover]

i think it was mentioned that some of the aspects of iwyts were inspired by what's wrong with secretary kim (please forgive me if i'm wrong) but i just wanna say that i prefer this story better. (!! spoiler for anyone who hasn't watched what's wrong with secretary kim) in wwwsk, they made kim miso stay when since the first episode, she wanted to find herself and be her own person instead of someone's secretary. the scene where she goes to meet her friends and all the stuffs in her bag belonged to her boss just made me feel really icky. i think everyone interprets it differently but i hated the fact that she never really got to know a world without him until the end. im really thankful and happy that y/n is choosing herself and is moving towards living a life free of debt. indeed a woman written by a woman!! <33 i hope y/n continues to put herself first and i hope in future y/n and jungkook develop true and genuine relationship. i know most of the people are sad and frustrated (me included) but looking at things through both y/n's and jungkook's perspective made me realize that i wouldn't want someone to love me knowing they feel indebted to my family or love someone while feeling indebted to their family. i hope im not the only one who wants a happy ending for mr Ri tooo!!!

loved the chapter as always will be not so patiently waiting for the next chapter <33

Yes, it's What's Wrong with Secretary Kim! I love that drama. I also find a lot of things wrong with it hahaha but true, he asked her to marry her so she'd stay so... def some parallels there. 😬😬

OC's choice is rly to rid herself of that burden. We'll see how she thinks about her decision later on. But also, I have so many plans for these 2 (that I'm rly hoping I have all the energy to write haha) bc there's so much growth to still be had after everything. I like exploring the different ways that flawed people handle their relationships and new challenges and I hope to be able to do that with these 2. We spent 10 chapters trying to understand them as people so let's see what new things they encounter. 😌✨

That said, I hope you enjoy the rest of this story!! Thank you so much for reading and letting me know what you think. 💕💕

[softlytowardthesun]

ollie akana fan club unite! but PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AU!! HELLO I AM SEATED

thank you so much I’m so flattered 🥰🥰

honestly, the Pride and Prejudice connections are pretty half-baked. It’s more a writing choice that helps me put my ideas into words than a fully realized AU. (Plus Amelia’s got as much if not more Catherine Morland in her characterization than Elizabeth Bennet, but it’s been way too long since I last read Northanger Abbey for me to make anything coherent out of that.) Anyhow, here goes:

For our purposes, we’re going to roll Tarrick, Santaura, and the Garcia parents into the Mr. and Mrs. Bennet stand-ins

So it’s Regency England, and this husband and wife duo used to be an happy couple until all the social problems of the day weighed them down. She’s paranoid about securing good matches for their kids, and he’s just too exhausted with life to realize the stakes.

At the Netherfield Ball, golden child Izzy (the “Jane Bennet”) instantly hits it off with Fern (Bingley, natch). Mrs. Bennet is thrilled about a potential love-match with a rich and successful suitor, and Amelia rolls her eyes as rest of the Bennets make fools of themselves in their efforts to match-make

(given how often Fizzy focus eps are also “Javi does something dumb without realizing it” eps, he slides surprisingly well into the Mary/Kitty position. Though naturally, he can actually back up the musical skill Mary likes to think she has)

Also in Fern’s orbit is Ollie, who Amelia immediately butts heads with, seeing him as a pretentious crank (but she’s not completely wrong though). They keep running into each other at the social events, and no, he’s not at all impressed by her. Why do you ask?

Izzy and Fern get closer, until all of a sudden Fern vanishes to Oakdale. Already furious on Izzy’s behalf, Amelia only gets angrier when she learns Ollie had a hand in it, trying to protect Fern from this crazy family (he’s not wrong about the Bennets being insane, but Amelia’s not about to concede the point to the guy responsible for her sister’s heartbreak)

Then some lord shows up, and he reinforces everything Amelia already believes about Ollie being awful by telling them about their shared history.

So imagine her shock when out of absolutely nowhere, he makes the Bad Love Confession. She lets him have it, about his ego, his stubbornness, meddling with Izzy and Fern, and The Incident with the lord

Ollie is shocked that she knows about The Incident and retreats. He later delivers the Mr. Darcy Letter, explaining that while there’s more to The Incident than she’s been led to believe, she’s absolutely correct about his character flaws. He doesn’t want to upset her any further, but he’s going to do what he can to set things right.

to clear her head, Amelia visits Solon (filling the Aunt and Uncle Gardiner role as the token responsible adult). Ollie comes back into her life, and while things are awkward, they take up this second chance to get to know each other better, and they bond. But just as things are heating up, the lord swoops back into their lives and threatens the Bennet family

Amelia and Ollie have to work together, and they save the day by pairing the lord up with a bride worthy of him from Regency England Nibyro (sorry, no matter how hard I try I just can’t picture Rita Repulsa as Amelia’s bratty kid sister)

So Izzy and Fern are together again, Amelia and Ollie become a couple, and Santaura Bennet’s head does not explode. Fin.

obviously this is pretty undercooked. I have no idea where to put Zayto and Aiyon, or P&P essentials like Lady Catherine, Mr. Collins, or Georgiana. But others have done more with less in fanfic-land haha

[hoghtastic]

I think the nun costume stories are from different days.

I have no idea if this counts as off topic but I wish the one fan account that went offline a year ago was still active during a time like this. The one with the funny content. Often a lil cheeky. I think she/he left because of Mexico and the politicians. She/he didn't pander to Alex like others. No fan account was like hers or his? I really have to say there are great fan accounts, whether they like his gf or not, but I think there are also really bad ones that are borderline cheap. One of them is particularly inferior to the others. 

At first I was confused because I thought the funny account was back under a new name, but at some point I realized that the content was just much worse. Maybe she just wanted to copy the other account's style? The original account never sexualized Alex as much. Then I knew OK, it had to be someone else. I was a little disappointed not gonna lie. I was a bit shocked at how much information I got when I briefly asked what others thought about the account I’m referring to. 

Supposedly it was already a topic on the old blog. She's into private information about Alex and sticks with people who can give her private videos. I heard that she gets really excited when Alex's parents or others see her stories, supposedly she thinks that Alex watches all of her stories with a fake account. About that I wasn’t as surprised, you notice very strongly that she desperately desires acknowledgment and likes from Alex and his gf for her comments and captions but masks it as support. She likes his family’s comments under Alex gf’s comments and tries to involve in everything Alex. But her captions and comments for Alex are borderline obsessed. You could think Alex is a god and not a human being when you see her comments. But again, many of her comments are aimed at her hoping or thinking that he and others of his people see her stories. 

She is the type of fan account that likes to allude to hate towards his gf in her captions in order to portray herself as a true fan. She also gets attached to better fan accounts, actually a really REALLY good fan account that has good content, seems to be close to her. It's crazy how extreme some fans see Alex. He’s only human. Seriously, I would also like to watch private videos but this kind of worship is delusional.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts, anon. 😊 I believe that, as long as there will be celebrities, there will always be the extreme fans who put them on a pedestal, to whom they can do no wrong. However, it's important to understand that they're only human, like the rest of us, who happen to have made some career choices which gave them more exposition. However, they still have their flaws and are far from perfect. And this is why I disagree with the "censorship culture" I've seen on some Alex fanpages, especially since he started dating Johanne, where people were called out and deemed "not true supporters" if they dared criticize him and/or her. Not everything they do is bad, obviously, but they're not perfect either, and if people would like to comment on it, as long as they keep being respectful, they should be allowed to do so.

About the private videos, I believe they're private for a reason. Most of the time, they belong to people who are not public figures, and therefore such content should never be downloaded nor shared among fanpages. If not illegal, it's at the very least morally wrong. And even if people don't straightforwardly share it, just "hinting" at having them and/or knowing private info, to make themselves look more important or "better fanpages" is just childish and a desperate need for attention, in my opinion. (It reminds me of those irritating kids in elementary school, "Ooh I know this and that, but I won't tell you! Haha! 😜". Like, either share it (knowing it's stolen, private content and therefore you shouldn't be doing it) or just shut up and keep it to yourself. 😆)

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Bro I think you just met Shidou incarnate /j LMAOO but I feel you better safe than sorry!! The many wonders of the internet lmao

ME fr me at first I remember seeing some announcements and I was like wait what’s going on why’s Shidou the cover of vol. 5??? Then I realized LOL but yes will keep you updated!!

The way that kaneshiro apparently has written some other freaky mangas too has me reeling like bro WHAT but yeah i wonder when we’ll finally nail in the idea that not sexualized is really bare minimum the fact that we have to say it’s bare minimum already speaks sm to society but anyways….

LMAOOOO everyone being a BLLK fusion but WAIT XY ASH >>>> no because i remember thinking “wait why is ash so different here” and I stumbled on a post that was like “it’s because they finally gave him fucking teeth” LMFAOOOO and lowk they’re not wrong??? I’m not sure what it is but without the teeth when he just has like a pink triangle for a mouth it just looks goofy ig but also he went through something between unova and kalos like his personality and everything but yeah anyways STEVEN STONEEEE

Wtf….wtf…….bro the bakery scene was a breaking/development point for that exact conflict too??? But also just wtf do they not remember anything about maki or mai like we KNOW how women are treated in jujutsu society which ties into the abuse reader faced and her reliance on noritoshi like bro if you think she was allowed to make independent decisions before you’re tripping too it was also literally all established leading up to the bakery scene like did you just not read….(I LOCE THAT QUOTE TOO THO) but AGREED I don’t wanna rain on peoples parades but yeah not my choice of fic setting where readers just op and edgy but no I definitely know what you’re talking about I also find it really cringey and can’t get myself to read it

Mira back at it again with the extensive research but WOW I would eat that up if I had any deeper knowledge of aot LMAO wait the breakdown of the badass killer action girl trope waitttt you’re onto something all of this sounds very very intriguing I can just imagine all the angst and development

LMFAOO “I’m a married man” is so loser karasu coded wait reader not following back is so fucking funny the petty salt is real that would totally happen TABIKIYOKEN LMAOOO otoya getting bullied by his team instead of kiyora stop that would be peak comedy

I GOT YOU!!! No because you’re just taking my thoughts and putting them into words if I thought you were a bad person I’d be a hypocrite LMAOO it’s fr refreshing to see a voice of reason though I look at tiktok and etc for memes and all but when something crazy comes up you know it’s really batshit insane

PSLSLS NUMBER ONE NAGI DEFENDER dw in 6 days we’ll get more…trust!!!! Ok but I didn’t realize so many people here hated him???? Like no leave him alone he’s just a boy who likes sleeping and gaming shoo shoo

- Karasu anon

LMAOOO SHE WASN’T EVEN SHIDOU SHE WAS STRAIGHT UP FANON SHIDOU it was horrible…tbh in our conversations and my random thoughts that i post i’ve said enough that anyone who knows me irl could put things together quite easily but the plausible deniability of my face not being on here + nobody ever reading our conversations besides us two gives me confidence (also it’s my blog and my life so i’ll do what i want…i can’t allow her to control my life completely PLUS i know her ao3 with her horrifically bad smut fics and i never told anyone even when i found it + i never told her my account so there’s that element to it)

HAHA that’s so interesting i’m actually intrigued now about this!! please do keep me posted LMAO and yeah he’s written a lot of really random stuff which is so interesting to me like what was the impetus to switch to a sports manga after that?? but anyways yeah one day we will move past the sexualization of female characters and get to writing them as actual people

NO BECAUSE THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT THE MORE I’M LIKE “wow i was really fate to like nagi huh” because not only did i like steven stone and inumaki (both pale haired baddies) i also really liked mahito when i first started jjk?? got a lot of hate for finding him attractive but i somehow did…and now it turns out he has the same VA as nagi so actually i think my mind just recognized him before i even knew it was him

I LOVEEE THE ART STYLE OF XY i lowkey stopped watching after xy but i wish they would’ve kept that more mature style and feel to the anime!! HAHA omg not ash getting teeth…he looked really good in xy though agreed and he feels like such a different character too?? like an actual trainer instead of an idiot 😭 tbh he should’ve won the kalos league he had such a good team too 😩 but it is what it is ig…

THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING LIKE THE BAKERY SCENE IS LITERALLY MEANT TO BE HER BREAKING POINT??? that’s when she realizes that it’s okay for her to be herself and grow progressively more sassy and self-reliant (her with todo and megumi specifically is SO funny like she becomes mini gojo with them almost) which is compounded by her bringing yuta back to life but fr that’s not even a theme i made up LMAOO like there are themes that are pi-specific (love as resurrection for example) but the mistreatment of women is EXPLICIT in jjk it’s not even implied gege straight up shows it 😭 it’s that tik tok reader/14 year old wattpad user epidemic i think…the fact that reader didn’t pop out of the womb fighting against the abuse she faced makes them think she’s automatically weak when honestly given the circumstances the entire scene in the prologue when she exorcises a curse with the pins from her hairstyle and insists to noritoshi in front of EVERONE that he allow her to go to school is incredibly brave and much more than can be expected of her realistically!! also wait but tangentially related someone also once commented on the scene in the chapter post-shibuya when reader asks yuta if she’s ugly that she was “fishing for compliments” i had to stop and stare at the screen for a moment there…like this girl has been PERMANENTLY DISGIFURED the scars on her neck and hands never go away!! yes it’s not to the extent that maki was but the two of them are very different characters + unlike maki reader has kind of grown up her entire life being praised for her beauty and being told that that’s one of her only redeeming qualities 😰 i don’t think it’s unreasonable/fishing for compliments that she’s insecure after going through an incredibly traumatic experience and having to look at the reminders of it every time she sees her reflection??? like let’s not forget that the scars on her neck are from when jogo is literally choking her to death and the ones on her hands are from when she effectively dooms tullia by using the last of her energy to use composition on jogo 😓 anyways most people are very nice commenters so don’t think i’m ungrateful or anything it’s just that the crazy ones are so insane i’m consistently flabbergasted by them

YES EDGY that’s the word!! like when they’re trying too hard to make them seem cool and powerful and whatnot i’m just like huh and then i close the tab it’s not for me 😩 but yk everyone has their preferences i guess

AWWW THANK YOU honestly i wish i was still into aot enough to finish it because it was such a fascinating story like the reader is probably my favorite reader EVER not only does she commit many many literal war crimes but i get to explore her mental state throughout it…like it’s not just the guy she kind of falls in love with she also dooms her former friends without much remorse in the moment it was really cool to write about that kind of detached state in a person where she’s making these brutal moves because she’s so overly concerned with protecting herself that she doesn’t care about how she’s ruining people’s lives…then once the war ends and she’s reminded of what she’s done she’s like HEAVILY depressed and lowkey suicidal and has some insane coping mechanisms and it’s even worse because when she goes home she’s treated like a hero even though she thinks she’s a monster 😰 and then she finally begins to heal in (what is probably my favorite chapter of anything ever) this scene where’s she’s taken to a hospital to meet with this ex-soldier who was tortured by their enemies (it’s a very gruesome description because i did not shy away from gore but basically he was kept in solitary confinement before they took him back out and pour acid over his face every day for weeks because he refused to talk [he didn’t know anything] so half of his face is completely burnt and one of his eyes has melted out) and she realizes that she also saved some people…his face is meant to be a reflection of her mental state so we see him later on looking much better which shows how she’s doing better too!! it’s such an intricate plot imo (not to self glaze) with the most insane angst and development but i had so much fun turning that stereotypical trope on its head and showing what war and conflict ACTUALLY does to people

karasu is SUCHHHH a loser in fwtkac especially omg imagine a girl slides into his dms and is like “hey i think you’re cute” and he just likes the message and doesn’t even respond meanwhile he’s heart reacting to reader’s every single story (besides the otoya one) and she eventually texts him (because they somehow have each other’s numbers) and is like “yo you need to stop i’m going to block you” and over text he’s just like “👍” but internally he’s like “Y/N NOTICED ME 🥹🤩🥰” omg can you imagine karasu just adopts kiyora as his son (he has experience w parenting given hiori) and they just terrorize blue lock as the resident number one bullies HAHAHA

LMAOO we are just that synced up fr…yeah tik tok is crazy i’m only there for the audios edits and memes other than that i try to avoid the insane takes i consistently see 😭 PLEASE THERE ARE SO MANY NAGI HATERS IT’S INSANE???? call me nanami the way i’m doing overtime defending him…to be fair as someone who actively does not like the top four most popular characters in the fandom i have to be prepared to take the heat i dish out 😩 maybe i need to change to a karasu theme i don’t think i’ve ever met a karasu hater 🤔 JKJK if the world doubles down on hating nagi then i will double down on loving him ‼️ forcing everyone to read pursuit just so they’re converted to nagism ong

[ywdtme]

Life update, 2024

My younger self should be safe around me, and I am so proud of it. I feel like there’s a lot of lessons coming up in my life lately. 

I have never thought that I would ask an old lady which floor she wanted to go when we’re in a lift, and I prioritized her first. I have never thought that I would talk to strangers, have eye contact when talking with them, and get my business done. I have never thought that I would tell the waiters when they got my orders wrong, instead of just accept it and silently upset. I’ve never thought that I could actually do anything by myself and overcome my fears. And there I believe, my younger self would be so proud of herself. 

Life has never been easier, but I am grateful for what I have now, I am enough.

People say if you have no luck in your love life then you must be so lucky in another area of life. I guess I do, for now, I have luck in my friendship. Well sadly, season changes, so do people. One thing that I got from what I've been learning in any kind of relations I have, we can never force people to always be around us.

Human beings are dynamic. I used to think that in the end, it's all about the person who is willing to stay on those ups and downs state of this life, and vice versa. It's about the person who is willing to get through all the boring or exciting days together, also willing to work things up together. But then there were some days that got me feeling not so good.

The worst feeling is when the person who used to tell you 'let's figure this out together', now become the person who says 'go find someone else better'.

This got me thinking, am I not enough? Especially when the world came crushing down, once again.

It's hurting when the person who used to be willing to sit down with you in the mud, now become the person who doesn't even care whether you are alive or not.

But then again, I realized. This world doesn't revolve around me. Everyone has their own life to live. I can never expect them to do everything exactly like what I have done to them. Never expect people to treat you just like how you treat them, because those kind of expectations will kill you sooner or later. Well, we're not supposed to put any expectation on people, I guess. Once again, it was me who broke my own heart. Ah, treating them well is still a choice though, but sometimes I don't realize that I am also still not good enough, so, who knows I might be the bad one in someone else's story, haha.

After all these times, I am still learning to accept how this world works the way it is. People come and go. Just consider some of those changes are just a phase, believe me soon you will get use to it. Although you got at least your own shadow but they're gone when it's dark unfortunately. In the end of the day, it's myself whom all I have. And again, my younger self would be so proud of herself. 

-Hope everyone could live your life well :)

[troglobite]

okay calmer but also kind of extensive but hopefully not THAT extensive Thoughts abt t/d l/sso

we are well into s2 now in our rewatch

we watched a few eps tonight

and we ended w the ep where we have ted finally talking to the doc, and crucially, where trent runs into ted at the crown and anchor.

okay. so.

thoughts & observations in no particular order, but a lot calmer now that i'm not screaming and ranting (literally) and kicking walls (almost literally) and dripping sweat bc i'm so worked up abt everything (unfortunately also literally, not an exaggeration)

okay so first of all, nate's treatment of colin in these eps makes me 100 times angrier knowing now what we do abt colin. devastating.

also, though?

when nate insults him, after colin comes in to check w him and see if he's done anything wrong to annoy him, nate says "jamie and dani are like picasso and gauguin" and colin responds "...pedophiles?"

this. is actually so fucking important?

nate, aggressively straight and domineering here, uses this comparison favorably.

colin, timid and gay, calls out these straight artists for what they are: fucking creeps.

A GAY MAN GOT TO CALL OUT STRAIGHT MEN FOR BEING NASTY FUCKING CREEPS.

THAT IS REALLY SUBTLE AND REALLY FUCKING IMPORTANT.

and it's also such a great way for him to accidentally completely undermine nate's point.

that is. fucking incredible writing.

additionally, idr when it was, but roy calls colin a chameleon, right? not in the eps we just watched, but at some point.

colin coming into nate's office--i think will? or someone? bumps into him "sorry i didn't see you" "camouflage!" lol

haha funny

except.

as others have pointed out, colin blends in.

he is literally in the closet. that is literally his hope and goal and purpose. to blend in. to fit in. to fade into the background a bit.

he says to trent in amsterdam, "i don't wanna be a spokesperson."

and here nate is, saying he's not an artist. his work doesn't hang in museums. it hands in a holiday inn. covering up a bloodstain.

that is such a painful way to describe what colin is doing.

and it's not that he's not himself! we ALSO see him go out w the team, sitting between isaac and sam, singing all the words to a song they didn't expect him to know! he has friends, he is himself.

but as he says to trent (and as he's told doctor sharon), he can't combine his two lives into one.

no matter how much they're friends, he's not entirely himself with them, bc he can't be. or he's afraid to be--and justifiably so.

ALSO.

colin is the only one we see repeatedly talking to doctor sharon. they genuinely were setting that up. "i am a strong and capable man." i love him dearly.

but anyway--

my point is. all of this stuff abt how colin blends in. he fades into the background. he's not important. they all lose their minds when zava leaves, and colin's the one that he replaced. and with zava gone, colin's back on the pitch, and everyone criticizes the choice.

it's. so frustrating! and hurtful!

and all of this shit abt him blending in and how he doesn't want to stand out or be a spokesperson.

and i just think. ....maybe it would be good for him to stand out. to shine. to get positive attention. he doesn't have to be a spokesperson. but he deserves....something.

anyway the only other person we see talking to and abt the doc is ted.

the team really appreciates her. she sees the entire team early on. but ongoing? it's mostly colin. and ted.

[stares]

additionally, i was very excited to see trent at the crown and anchor, bc i hadn't realized at all that he was on a date, as several people have presumed.

and i was like "oh i wanna see! i wonder if he is! who's the guy?"

well turns out is a fucking clone of ted but with glasses and stripes.

the scene plays out like this

ted alone at the bar

mae says

"if music be the food of love, give me excess of it" (which does skip the "play on" part)

those are the opening lines of twelfth night.

a play in which orsino, the man who speaks those lines, thinks he's in love with this one woman, but then a different woman comes to him in the disguise of a man, and whoops they fall in love instead. (this is, without a doubt, the most bisexual play in shakespeare's canon. and that's saying something.)

then they hard cut to trent about to leave the bar, but he spots ted, pauses, and turns to his date and says oh sorry i'll just be a second, i'll be right out.

i paused to look at this man.

notable mustache (made so prominent that it was the first thing i noticed abt him--it's literally a styled handlebar mustache)

same exact parting of his hair as ted, and beginning to bald in the same ways

a collared shirt which is worn

underneath a light sweater

the only difference? his glasses.

and then trent walks over

"of all the pubs in the world!"

[stares]

also, trent?

trent's wearing what he always wears: a band t-shirt. literally such a notable detail of his outfits whenever he shows up that it's how ppl identify and talk abt him.

"if MUSIC be the food of love, give me excess of it"

[stares even more]

we also get jamie and roy interactions that are Delicious.

oh wait actually i do want to return to colin real quick.

beard hears what nate says to colin and tells him to apologize because it was "weird and personal"

[STARES]

nate does apologize

but as he's doing it, the team joins in to describe him w insults in order to convey what it was he was being to colin. a dick, an asshole, a cock, a....something butterfly, idr, that last one was dani. lol

but this includes isaac, jamie, dani, and....i wanna say zoureaux/van damme. idr.

but it's just. colin told them what nate said.

and they backed him up.

and then when colin forgave him, they ALL forgave him.

god. i just. i want colin to be okay. idk what i want this show to do w his storyline, but i just want him to be okay. i have to believe he will be. the team truly love each other.

also detail: i haven't forgotten that HIGGINS suggested the problem was ted and that they should look into getting different players. they got zava, that was a winning streak but a Problem.

and then ted came up with total football on his own, and now, bc of the lasso way, it's WORKING. and that's ted.

i LOVE this.

okay back to roy and jamie.

we just saw in s3's latest ep that jamie was UPSET abt not being able to switch roles w someone else! he WANTED to learn and have fun! he was sad and disappointed that he couldn't be trained and included in the same way. :(

that's such incredible growth. as others have pointed out, in s1 he says, "coach, i'm me. why would i wanna be anything else?"

TO HAVE FUN! TO CONNECT W YOUR TEAMMATES! TO LEARN! TO GROW!!!!!

i love this FUCKING show. it is SO IMPECCABLY WRITTEN!!!!

so back here in s2 where we are, jamie wants roy to coach him, bc roy refuses to. he's begging. he'll do anything roy wants, he just wants to be coached. and he's right! it's unfair! (and roy hilariously says to dock his pay by 4% since he's not technically coaching the whole team lol)

which is a GREAT fucking set up for s3 when jamie wants to be better than zava, and ROY OFFERS TO COACH HIM ON HIS OWN AT 4 AM. EVERY DAY. (and as others have pointed out, he notes that 4 am is the time when ppl are least expecting anything and therefore easiest to take by surprise. lol)

an INCREDIBLE turnaround for him, as well. OFFERING to coach jamie, bc now he sees that jamie MEANS IT! he's committed!

they're genuinely growing closer and i love it. it's so sweet.

ALSO there was a callback to this s2 ep in the latest s3 ep!

i had totally forgotten abt it

but roy's coaching advice is that jamie is too nice and timid of a player now, when what would help them win more is him being a prick, again. "so i can go back to being a prick?" "no, only sometimes."

how will he know? he'll get a signal.

what's the signal?

flipping him off, giving him the middle finger. lol

that never comes up again--

UNTIL

THIS LATEST EPISODE.

where jamie has Thoughts abt total football and the team's performance, and he says "yeah i have some thoughts but i don't wanna sound like a prick"

so everyone--starting w colin possibly???--flips him off, TELLING HIM TO BE A PRICK. GIVING HIM PERMISSION.

i had FORGOTTEN abt that in s2!!! in context in s3 while having forgotten the original source of flipping him off, it just read as funny to me, like they were insulting him and implicitly offering him permission.

but no, that's their signal: jamie, go ahead and be a prick, it'll help us win/do better.

I LOVE THAT.

other things i loved abt roy and jamie in these s2 eps

we get the ep where keeley Loses Her Fucking Mind bc roy is unknowingly being overbearing and clingy.

I MAINTAIN THAT SHE SHOULD'VE APOLOGIZED FOR SCREAMING AT HIM AND NOT JUST TELLING HIM IMMEDIATELY.

as an autistic with extreme trauma around that kind of shit, she SHOULD HAVE APOLOGIZED. one of the few things i think the show Got Wrong.

the rest of the resolution was great, though. and roy expresses his feelings very well.

HOWEVER

it's jamie who incidentally offers the perspective he needs to figure out his relationship w keeley. lol

"all due respect, coach, but that's not what he needs from me. what he needs is for me to give him space."

and then of course the iconic

".........FUCK!" and storm off. lol

but i love that! legitimately, all those roy/jamie truthers out there, i mean, I FUCKING GET IT! I SEE IT!

THEY PUT ROY IN A FUCKING RICKSHAW WITH PRIDE FLAGS AND RAINBOWS ALL OVER IT WHILE A LOVE SONG PLAYED AND THEN HE RETURNED TO TED QUOTING EVEN MORE ROMCOMS AT HIM

like i'm fucking sorry. REALLY???

and then jamie always being there for roy w relationship woes. like REPEATEDLY.

and jamie being mature abt his feelings for keeley

jamie being there to comfort roy when they broke up

i'm just

[STARES]

it truly is wonderful and compelling.

also i am still hung up on trent talking abt the 3 things and wondering what the fourth thing is, and then telling ted--like a dork--that the fourth thing doesn't matter, bc the lasso way has all been leading up to this total football thing and they'll perfect it.

and of course it's also abt his book, bc that's the clarity and overenthusiastic rambling of a writer going OH MY FUCKING GOD FINALLY I KNOW WHAT MY CORE THESIS IS lol

and i'm truly. TRULY.

entirely hung up

on them walking onto the pitch for training

the three of them (coaches) pass by trent on the sidelines

and ONLY TED

says

"hi, trent"

to which he responds

"hi, ted"

also at the crown and anchor, after the quote from twelfth night that introduces trent who was on a date with a man who looked exactly fucking like ted, at the end of their exchange, trent says, "love our chats"

I'M SURE YOU DO, BUD.

I'M SURE YOU FUCKING DO

like here's the thing.

ted mentioned being straight exactly ONCE in the ENTIRE show.

now--that would be nothing, normally! a statement of something that is already presumed!

but.

it was in the context of--oh my fucking god i'm going to lose my fucking mind i just realized

okay not only was it in the context of--like okay hang on.

the whole speech he gives is about how he settled on his mustache.

he says

"as a straight white male in kansas and in sports and who's afraid of needles, my modes of expressing individuality were limited"

he mentions being straight as a fucking prison

not as a casual thing, but as a LIMITATION ON THE AVAILABLE WAYS FOR HIM TO EXPRESS HIMSELF.

the story continues--he chose some rancid facial hair, thought it looked great, but then beard said, and i quote, "it looks like you just ate bigfoot's ass"

and roy says "more like ass-squatch. i hate what you've done to me."

eating.........ass............OKAY THEN. in the same ep where beard talks abt how jane wants to try pegging. alsdkfj alsdkjfljdsklf

ANYWAY.

he concludes this tale by explaining WHY he's been talking abt it.

"sometimes the right answer is hidden underneath a few other things."

something to that effect.

basically, the truth and the right choice and what will work is hiding behind various layers of other things that you have to get through first.

THAT'S what he says in the same story where he OPENS by saying he's STRAIGHT and that HETEROSEXUALITY IS A PRISON?!!?

here's where i am with everything

i spent 2 seasons subconsciously ignoring all of the queer stuff bc i fully was like "there's no way this show would actually do that."

i have been burned and queerbaited too many times in my life.

i am now firmly in the camp of "that bitch gay" said for fun at various shows, and sometimes they go there, but most of the time, they don't.

and i just enjoyed ted lasso so much that i didn't even say anything.

until season 3.

where on the second or third episode, i literally said "i think ted and trent should end up together."

i had no proof.

i just liked The Vibes.

and i was like "haha wouldn't that be fun."

and then the show said

HEY GUESS WHAT EVERYONE'S FUCKING QUEER ALSDKJFALSDKJFALSKDJ

so now i am retroactively losing my fucking mind.

this show has a "throwaway" line in one episode that then comes up FIFTEEN EPISODES AND ONE FULL SEASON LATER.

their commitment to the bit is INCREDIBLE. the episode "rainbow"--

they have an episode all about romcoms. quoting as many as possible. the framing of the episode's entire plot is like a romcom. all of it. and they chose to call it rainbow and make the song, which is emblematic of the episode, is she's like a rainbow.

and in that episode, ted says "things will always work out in the end. not in the way you expect or want, but it'll always work out."

AND I AM JUST !!!!!

like their signal to jamie being flipping the bird. keeley and rebecca and "i'm going to reapply my lipliner". the boxes that nate makes with his niece (who we've finally met!).

like ALL of that matters! all of that comes back around!!!

all of these details are relevant and matter, and EVERYTHING is deliberate.

colin wearing camo and joking that that's why someone literally didn't see him. colin, a gay man, being the one to call out straight men for being fucking creeps.

NOTHING IS ON ACCIDENT IN THIS SHOW.

and so i just.......

the most bisexual shakespeare play is quoted AT ted.

it references music.

trent, notorious band t-shirt wearer, then walks up.

he leaves his date, a man who looks exactly like ted but just slightly to the left, to talk to ted.

ted lies to him abt his problems.

and trent says

"love our chats"

ted REPEATEDLY comments on the beauty and appearances of MULTIPLE men in the show.

the rainbow episode features him quoting romcoms at the whole team, but MAINLY roy--who ends up in a rainbow-covered rickshaw to carry out the romcom ending of rushing to the airport (stadium) to declare his love (that he agrees to coach).

ted's only reference to being straight is in a NEGATIVE light.

additionally, we got a couple other small things.

keeley mentions that jane (i genuinely think y'all are right that jane and jack are sisters) once followed her home to ask if beard and ted were shagging.

beard is VERY sex positive and unabashed abt all of that stuff.

he tells nate to not be "weird and personal" abt insulting colin, and to apologize to him.

nate and beard previously teamed up in s1 to talk to ted--and ted says, "are y'all here to tell me you're in a relationship?" and then says something abt being an ally, and beard looks annoyed (they were talking abt needing to bench roy)

in the latest s3 ep, ted says to roy

"look at that head'a hair. god had to take it away to make things fair."

y'know who else has a great head of hair?

trent.

y'know who's in the room that the camera keeps dramatically cutting to for reaction shots?

trent.

y'know what roy says to ted after this?

a grunt of agreement.

jamie literally teaches roy how to ride a bike. they commiserate over keeley and their various familial relationships.

also small thing but i DID notice that we NEVER see where roy lives.

he's either at his sister's place or keeley's. we literally don't know where he lives.

we even know where JAMIE lives, ffs.

and briefly, where beard lives. where rebecca lives. we've even seen dani's bedroom (briefly, after a nightmare abt earl the dog).

but we have literally never seen where roy lives.

and given the fact that he's still so Angry all the time. ....i just find it interesting. is that part of his growth?

also him being "clingy" w keeley--he's so attentive and loving.

and yet HE broke up w her.

and rebecca says to him, "she's going to see someone who thinks they deserve her."

implying roy thinks he doesn't deserve her.

and legitimately--like--roy also says he doesn't have nate's genius football acumen or whatever.

i really think he's battling his insecurity.

and jamie helps him w it, teaching him how to ride a bike, and letting him see a windmill.

roy doesn't like allowing weakness. or vulnerability. he HATED crying at his press conference announcing his retirement.

and i just.............

[stares]

idfk, man.

this show is fucking incredible. everything is so tightly, carefully written.

i still can't get over the fact that everyone saw ted react to colin and michael kissing in an alleyway and immediately went

"that's an older gay having That Reaction"

and it WAS.

and then MORE THAN THAT

that trent has said NOTHING abt it. "for months", as he put it.

and we were like

"well yeah, he's queer. you don't betray one of your own like that."

and what reason does he offer to colin for not outing him?

EXACTLY FUCKING THAT.

it just felt like being seen in such a real way. such a small thing but so genuinely fucking wonderful.

i previously just really enjoyed this show. i cried, i got invested. it was v nice!

but now my entire person is CONSUMED by this show because they MADE IT FUCKING GAY.

and it HAS BEEN GAY SINCE THE BEGINNING.

i just didn't allow myself to believe, to see.

EVEN NOW! I CAN'T SEE IT, SOMETIMES!

will was at that jazz club w higgins in amsterdam, and he's looking over at that couple making out.

and i'm like "ew why is he staring at that woman?"

HE WASN'T JUST STARING AT HER, HE WAS STARING AT HER AND HER BOYFRIEND

HE HAD A FUCKING THREESOME

like i'm just.

even now, i'm assuming things are straight.

fucking absurd. THE ABSURDITY OF IT ALL!!!

so, do i actually think ted might be queer? possibly! if it is true/canon, i think it'll be a late game reveal that sort of leaves implications for his future wide open.

do i think ted and trent will end up together? probably not. i still firmly think that ted ends up romantically alone or open at the end.

but i DO think that it'll come out that trent is fucking in love with ted. or at least deeply enamored with him. there's no other way that fucking plays out.

do i think that roy and/or jamie will come out? possibly! they've laid it on really thick w roy. i can see that happening. and yet still the majority of me is like "that's not fucking happening. there's no way they have more than one of the teammates and coaches be queer. no way." and yet!

and re: jamie, there's less implying that he's queer, i'll say that.

the only thing there really is is his relationship w roy.

do i think that THEY will end up together? probably not, but tbh, who fucking knows? i genuinely think the roy/keeley/jamie shippers ARE ONTO SOMETHING.

i now have no idea how far this show will go wrt queer rep. i just don't.

but like. .....

rebecca is For Sure straight. the way she talks abt men and women, she's straight.

same w higgins--though i would be money he had an experimental phase.

many of the team's players are definitely straight.

i think beard is straight but may have......strayed. not much, though, if he's unsure abt pegging.

nate is DEFINITELY straight.

and like--

all of these characters have said things in a casual, non-performative way to like, confirm their heterosexuality.

.....nobody else really has.

jamie hasn't. since s1 and the v beginning of s2, he's completely moved on from relationships.

there was keeley and then bex (which !!!!), and then one woman he slept w casually. then the dating reality show where he only slept with certain women as part of a strategy to win the reality show.

and ever since then? literally nothing.

roy hasn't. his reaction to keeley having a girlfriend is really calm. he mostly seems sad that she's moved on, and he's having complicated feelings abt it. but it's not the fact that she's bisexual--the way he and jamie react to that news seems to imply that they knew she was bisexual. which!!! to be fair!!! if i hadn't been afraid to believe in the queerness of certain characters, i ALSO would've known!

otherwise, roy has been really sensitive, kind, clingy, dorky and goofy, and fiercely protective of himself and others. and hasn't really otherwise said much abt anything re: other women. keeley is the only one we've really seen and heard abt.

there WAS phoebe's teacher. i think we were meant to get a hint of it when he walks into his office and sees a card from liza or something? but like. .....that's it.

ted hasn't. i know, he says "as a straight white male" in this latest ep. and he previously in s1 calls himself an ally. but. ......[stares] in context, those things don't necessarily confirm much. the amount that he compliments other men. NOW! TO BE CLEAR! he is v much not there for toxic masculinity (toxic positivity, yes, sometimes, but not masculinity). this could v much just be him being comfortable complimenting other men bc that's how he operates.

it just seems. Interesting. all of the things that he says, that are said to him, about him, around him. and the framing of certain things. and him saying straight was not in a "hi, i'm straight!"--it was in the way where........it feels relevant to his social standing, and not who he is, bc the things he lists and the environment he was in were literally limiting his ability to express himself.

and btw, the moment that beard tells him that his facial hair looks bad, like he just ate bigfoot's ass?

RIGHT BEFORE HE WALKS DOWN THE AISLE TO GET MARRIED.

that just.

that seems deliberate.

yes, we've mainly seen ted w women. absolutely. but, to me, the things he's said and done.........aren't really confirmation that we can or should rule out bisexuality. which is. WILD, to me.

anyway.

point being, idk how far the show will go. idk what's in store for the characters.

i know that next week's ep includes a "leak" that has implications for keeley.

i don't think it'll be abt her relationship. if it is, it'll be some shitty information abt jack.

but she's the PR manager for the team, still.

i worry that it'll be abt colin.

could be abt roy? idfk.

but i'm just.

i am along for this ride.

this show is so well fucking done i can't imagine NOT using it in classes to teach incredible screenwriting, and incredible visual storytelling. just absolutely amazing.

[thoughtfulstudentsalad]

I beg your pardon? Has she not tried to become more involved with politics over time? It's only been less than a goddamn year, give the girl some slack, her father was restricting her education for her entire life. Normally royals aren't restricted from that. Il chose to stay cooped up in his room, but Yona never even had a choice. Yet she's done far more for Kouka than her father did.

Whereas Su-Won had the luxury of being surrounded by so many supporters and getting access to a political education since his very birth, since he was originally seen as the freaking crown prince. No matter what, you have to admit that Su-Won wouldn't be where he is if he wasn't Yu-Hon's son and benefitting from the privileges of nobility.

He is not rash, neither driven by personal gains. He puts the best interest of the country above his own and sacrificed his own well being to relieve the suffering of the people who were damaged by ' the king who kept family first'

HAHA sorry but this is not true. No matter what even if it was for the country, he still went after revenge, there was a personal stake in his motives.

Yona is kind but not wise, she is emotional but not skilled in politics

She's still better than Il.

I REPEAT, THE MC CAN BE WRONG. LET THAT SINK IN.

Nothing is "sinking in" when I already know this.

about the akatsuki no yona vs soowon thing, yes its making yona look like the hero. But I don't think so. soowon was the one who managed everything from bottom to top and did negotiations with other countries to maintain a balance

The matter is that the series is titled Akatsuki no Yona, probably because the dawn has to do with her hair. She is also the legitimate and canonical heroine of this series. Whether Su-Won plays a more important role as the king is kind of irrelevant here, ultimately it was the author's decision.

She is literally protected by the plot armor. She is spared from making the difficult Decision. What balance has she attained? She has not faced any conflict

Let's see... she was forbidden from stepping outside, lost her father, mother, almost Hak a number of times, dealt with heartbreak, dealt with realizing how ignorant and responsible she was for the suffering of her people, learned her father was hated by his country, got stabbed in the back and a bloody eye protecting Lili, swallowed down her resentment to ally with and protect Su-Won, risked her life to stop Su-Won from starting a war with Xing, forced herself to deal with Kye-sook, acknowledged and thanked the murderer of her mother, stayed calm after being slapped in the face by Chagol, decided to fight for Zeno after hearing that the dragon gods wanted her to kill him? Been dealing with future visions of all her friends dying and trying to change that fate?

And yes she seems to have 'protection', but is she entirely protected if the dragon gods made her the only person who could kill Zeno? When they are why she saw Hak die in front of her in her dream?

I'm not saying she's my favorite character by any means, because she's certainly not, but to say she's "not faced any conflict" is total BS. Like haven't you been reading the story? Her entire character had her getting out of a bubble to gain more knowledge about the world. She's definitely better than King Il. Even Su-Won has admitted it, so I don't know why you would deny this. I think you're trying to rationalize this.

He is emotionally intelligent. Lol. Not like a crybaby. The boy didnt even had anyone to lean on when his father died. Yona had Hak. He had to steel himself. If that is not emotional balancing I don't know what is

SUPPRESSING EMOTIONS DOESN'T EQUATE BALANCE.

As long as he hasn't dealt with those unresolved feelings and continues avoiding them, which he has a tendency to do, I really can't call that emotionally intelligent. That's just bottling up feelings and a time will eventually come when it explodes and comes crashing down.

He's the guy who tried to abandon his friends because his father said so and then realized only later that it was impossible. An emotionally intelligent person would have had the self-awareness to realize this about this themselves a long time ago.

The story is called Akatsuki no Yona, no Akatsuki no Suwon. So in this story Yona will be right. Imagine thinking that putting your country above your family and loved ones is a positive message. Finding a balance between your political duties and your personal life is what a ruler should be. By the way, Suwon loves people, but he doesn't understand them. He doesn't have much emotional intelligence. He can predict the material needs of the populace, but feelings are another matter entirely.

Hi Anon! I wholeheartedly agree with you. Putting a nation over loved ones is not a healthy or positive way to live. Yona has managed to find a balance, and while Su-Won is intelligent, he lacks emotional intelligence. I don’t think he has fully processed his grief or realized how broken he truly is. Treating people like disposable pieces is no way to rule in the long run unless you want all your followers to lose trust/loyalty and turn on you. Nevertheless, I think the utilitarian mindset is definitely accurate to some politicians in the real world, even today. In that respect there is realism. Being a ruler isn’t easy, and hard choices often must be made. If Yona becomes queen, she must find a way to face that.

Whether or not Yona will have the throne also isn't clear, however. We aren’t sure if she wants to be queen. We also don't know if Su-Won will die. If not, I can imagine he’ll either learn to rule as a more balanced individual, or he may really abdicate the throne to Yona as he is absolutely exhausted from always prioritizing national interests at the cost of his personal relationships and self. I don't mind either end now. I believe that abdicating the throne might be a great way to end his arc. But again, it depends on whether Yona wants the throne.

Also, what about Hak? What does he want?

[a-master-procrastinator]

10 OC Facts: Bal'sara

Tagged by @raven-of-domain-kwaad, thank you! And tagging (no pressure): @chaoticspacelesbians, @the-nameless-legacy, @palepinkycat, @shanfamilydrama and @a-muirehen.

Had difficult time choosing a character, but decided to give Bal some facts (she hasn't told me much about herself up to this point, yet much remains a mystery). Since they all came in a short period of time, these facts are not going to be that specific, just something basic.

1. Bal'sara was born on Ryloth in a wealthy and influential family. She doesn't remember much of home or family, only that she had parents and two siblings, older brother and younger sister.

2. Her connection to the Force was discovered at age of 4. Parents knew what this meant, and while there was still war going on, they agreed to give Bal to the Jedi for training. Unlike my other consular, Bal never had a chance to meet her family again.

3. As a child, Bal has been told a lot of stories about the Jedi, mostly something like fairy tales about kind wizards who can heal people and throw rocks with just their mind. Basically, the Jedi were her favorite heroes of fictional stories (even though the Jedi themselves were not fictional) that she looked up to.

4. This lead to some disappointments - Jedi turned out to be more stoic and boring than she thought (can't blame her though), and masters trying to teach Bal'sara to be a classic Jedi only made her disobey rules more. It's been a long time until Bal'sara came to understanding that what training was actually pretty important, so she tried to follow it as much as she could. Still, even with life being more complicated than tales about noble heroes, Bal'sara strives to be one.

5. Love for fancy clothing came from childhood and only grew stronger with Bal's desire not to be a classic boring Jedi. She refused to wear simple robes and changed outfit at the first opportunity.

6. Figuring her form isn't easy. Bal'sara uses a double-bladed lightsaber (with changing it to a pike later), and as far as I understand not every form goes well with this weapon. Forms III, IV, V and VII seem to be pretty good for this weapon. The problem is, Bal'sara is kind of an elegant duelist with calculated strikes, mastered footwork, much like form II, but I don't imagine it goes well with double-bladed lightsaber. Then again, why wouldn't Bal'sara try to do exactly that? So as far as I'm concerned, Bal'sara utilizes form II in lightsaber combat and form III against multiple enemies and blaster fire.

7. Bal'sara's disappointment in fairy tale Jedi did not stop her from consuming everything in libraries about various Force powers and techniques. Of course she wasn't allowed to practice every technique (simply bc some of them are Dark Side powers), but her desire to utilize as many as possible is what led her to Consular's path.

8. As she didn't have much of that during her training (people had high expectations of her bc of her strong connection to the Force), Bal loves to spend some time with younglings and padawans to make their training a bit more fun, usually just letting kids be kids, throwing games and little friendly competitions for cool items or sweets she brought from other worlds.

9. Airistan was one of those padawans Bal took under her 'care'. As Airistan was not used to all Jedi stuff at all, Bal helped her get around and provided lightsaber practice and was just a member of the Order who seemed more like a normal person to Airistan. So this is where their friendship started, and together they brought a lot of headache to the Council.

10. And to end it on a fun note: no matter how strong with the Force she is and how hard she uses it to keep warm, Bal'sara cannot stand cold weather, so she's fully onboard with Felix about Hoth (also calling myself out for a very old ask i ended up not replying. sorry!).

[cerastes]

I think at least for me Schwarz is in the same boat as Tomimi: I recognize the horny design, but she's too funny for me to be horny about. She's not nearly as funny as Tomimi, don't get me wrong, but I just love this like, born and raised assassin who met this upper-middle-class bookworm with a parasol and because the bookworm didn't know any better to be scared of her Schwarz decided she had no choice but to simp.

No no you're right, Schwarz IS funny.

Schwarz was a normal kid that HAHA THAT'S A LIE She is originally from Rim Billiton and her parents were ore traders, but then one day they got scammed into buying not Whatever Ore They Wanted but Originium Ore instead, which 1) they didn't deal with and 2) got Schwarz infected. So they went to complain like "hey you scammed us" and the scammers were like "the customer is always WRONG" and killed them, then grabbed Babby Schwarz and sold her to slavery, where she was purchased by a mercenary group that trained her to be the Ultimate Child Assassin later Ultimate Assassin in general, and they were like "Ok, we finally can take on this big job! We're going to kill the Mayor of Siesta! And for that, we need our BIGGEST GUN" and who else would be the gun of sizeable heft if not Schwarz?

So Unfailing Super Assassin Schwarz confronts the Mayor, and the Mayor says "hey, you are pretty good at this, you should be my daughter's bodyguard" and Schwarz was like "literally why" and Majorman was like "better pay, better life, I have a cute daughter your age" and Schwarz was like "bet" and well, she did just that, but they don't tell Ceylon ANY of this, so as far as Ceylon knows, Schwarz is just her weird stoic lovable bodyguard friend gal pal who makes really good tea and also for some reason can destroy entire armored platoons with just a crossbow but otherwise totally normal.

What you have to remember is that Ceylon is a scholar, an academic, a researcher, she's high int, but definitely low wis, because you know she has witnessed Schwarz go full John Wick With A Pen on at least six different people and all Ceylon could think was "Wau! I can't wait to go home so we can continue watching Utena :D" like, this was NORMAL for Ceylon, this was normality, no wonder she sees every freak at Rhodes Island and is like "this is a peaceful place with kind inhabitants, a true and tried pharmaceuticals company cut from the finest of cloths!", when your frame of reference for normality is SCHWARZ, of course you'll witness Specter chewing on reinforced metal, Ifrit burning entire hallways in a bout of rage, Shamare playing medium to the forces of the abyss, and Lappland eating a Kitkat wrong and be like "this is literally just Tuesday". Ceylon probably believes Shalem is a normal guy.

It gets even worse/better when you realize that Schwarz was getting MK Ultra Superassassin training when she was like 8.

Schwarz has 20 years of combat experience. That's an insane amount!

But she got infected when she was 6! Which means she was sold to slavery and subsequently trained to be Solid Snake Catgirl around the time when she was maybe 8 or so! NO WONDER Schwarz looks at all the freaks at Rhodes Island and is like "haha oh wow you are all freaks I respect literally every single one of you" LIKE YEAH OK SCHWARZ, THEY ARE FREAKS, but not you, oh, no, not you, you are only accomplishing what all these people manage with extreme dimensional-reality warping powers and super unholy magic, by simply being that good with your crossbow. Schwarz' superpower is literally "is REALLY good with a crossbow" and it matches and surpasses people with fucking reality altering powers or control over gravity or what the hell ever, Schwarz is a fucking riot, she really said "Wow! I never thought I'd see anyone like you people!" well yeah no one would expect a single catgirl with a crossbow to fucking blow up the Pentagon singlehandedly if she could, Schwarz definitely has the sheer firepower and skill for it, just because she's THAT good at Crossbow.

[beckface]

WORDGIRL ANIMAL AU

Okay okay this took forever but it was so much fun AHHHH!

More about this au-

First things first Capt. Huggyface is NOT an ape in this au! He’s a human (or human passing alien) lmao. He left his home planet of Lexicon to scout out new territories for the government, but unbeknownst to him a tiny kitten snuck on to his spaceship!

Like in the show he crashlanded on earth, except this time THIS earth is populated solely by intelligent animal life. He can understand them, but they can not understand him, but soon he realizes that the kitten that accidentally came with him CAN speak to him and speak for him. It’s basically the same as in the show, except with animal shenanigans and Huggy being like way taller the Becky and also she’s legit just a cat

He sets up shop in the woods, but the Botsfords find them and adopt Becky. Huggy doesn’t go with them in this au though because he feels weird being under the care of a dog and kangaroo, and he’s a grown man. Through Becky, he becomes friends with them though and hangs out with them and Becky often. He kinda just, is the only person on earth and every animal finds him facinating at first. 

Some other minor changes:

- Squeaky was Boxlietner’s evil lab assistant. He was jealous of Steven’s genius so he tricked him into trying to create a mind reading device, that Squeaky rigged so that Boxlietner’s brain would merge onto his. It went wrong, and Squeaky became attached to the doctor.

-General Smoochington is Victoria’s Butler

-Lil Mittens is Butcher’s adopted baby

-Any pets shown in the show are generally now roomates, friends, or family members

-When it comes to interspecies couples it works like in Bojack Horseman where the kids are one species or the other, it’s best not to think about it too hard

-They do have animal instincts when I want them too otherwise don’t worry about it

-Yes they still eat meat but it’s strictly seafood, this goes for the Butcher’s whole thing too, learnerer is an alien and hyperintelligent

Everything else is pretty much the same! This is more of an excuse for me to draw animals because I like drawing them more then people KDJDS Also warning I will actively be ignoring correct heights in the future

I will happily explain any of the animal choices whifwdkjs thanks to everyone who helped me with them too

Mini things I’m adding on

-Johnson is a cheetah because he’s a nervous child and also they put Puppies and Cheetah Kittens together to comfort each other in captivity, TELL ME THAT ISN’T TJHONSON

-Okay everyone around me said Miss Question is an Owl and i’m PRETTY sure it’s for the sole reason because owls say “who”. It also works because she can fly though and got her powers at night

-Dtb sometimes gets carried away with cackling evilly and starts howling. Becky, living with two dogs, knows to just wait it out. He also wags his tail but since it’s a mouse tail it looks really silly

-Both Glen and Tobey say they’re wolves and DTB is getting real sick of the appropriation

-Nocan’s tusks are disturbingly powerful

-Whammer whams by rearing up and hitting his hooves on the ground

-Butcher can roar out meat aswell as shoot through his paws

-Dtb once threatened to eat Steve McClean because of how fed up he got. Becky hissed at the mousebrain to get him to stop and “play fair”

-Violet is sooo physically awkward, being a fawn

-Scoops climbs on his friends a lot to take pictures and get a better view

*Becky staring at Scoops, in love*

Scoops, slightly worried she’s about to hunt him: 0_0

-Tobey tries to bury himself in a hole and does the fox thing where they dive face first whenever his mom comes to fetch him

-Arg winds himself up in a knot like all the time

-The narrator is also an animal but he changes what animal he says he is every episode

-The scene where mr big is climbing his statue and is like “Haha you can’t get me now wordgirl!” because he forgot she can fly happens all the time, because he flies up and forgets that she has superpowers. She can not only fly without wings but has superspeed, so like, what was your plan there Big guy

all together image for a bit better size reference-

SOME CHARACTERS NOT PICTURED:

-Maria is still an energy monster! Considering having her just be on all fours though

-Rose is a german shepard

-Reginald is a peacock

-Chazz is a llama

-The mayor is a beaver MAYBE

-Exposition guy is a ostrich

-Grocery store guy is a lemur

————

addendum

[appalachianapologies]

Okay the good news is that i got a 90% on my microbio exam the bad news is that i literally do not understand my linguistics homework. the other good news is holy crap i love you guys and your support is actually unreal!!!!! i am in awe and feel so honored ♥️♥️

So Mac, who has begun to slowly get his memories back (he still doesn’t know why, and it still is like. Hmm. weird.) is like “that can’t be right” because the Gwen that he remembers—the Gwen that is in the original timeline—turned over a new leaf right before she died. She realized in the dam that it was the wrong thing to do and made sure mac stayed alive in order for him to fix her mistake, so Mac is like “she wouldn’t escape” except for the glaring and obvious fact that yes, she did in fact just escape, mac.

So mac and jack go take a trip down to the blacksite and try and figure out what exactly happened, but while they’re there, they also come across murdoc (bc for some reason there’s only like one blacksite in this fic apparently lmao don’t judge me it’s for the plot) and murdoc does his creepy little murdoc things where he goes “oh macgyverrrrrr i had this wonderful dream the other night-” and at first mac just brushes it off because creepers gonna creep, but then he’s like “oh shit what if it’s not just the team that are getting these weird dream memories” so he decides it’ll be the lesser of two evils if he talks to murdoc.

Murdoc tells him about his “dream” which is 5x10, and mac is over here trying to act So Normal About This and is just like “wow haha so weird you’re weird and creepy anyway gotta go-” but mac’s poker face is awful let’s be honest, so murdoc gets suspicious. That being said Murdoc could not dream (pun intended) of the whole timeline shift thing, so he doesn’t know exactly what’s going on, just that mac is acting weird as heck™ 

So anyway Jack and Mac talk with the guards and watch the security footage and there’s no denying it- Gwen snuck out of the blacksite and it most definitely isn’t for good reasons, but it’s not like they can do anything about it now but find her. Mac is still determined to prove that she’s a good person and that she’s changed, that she no longer agrees with Codex’s agendas and all of that, but everyone is like “bro look at literally all of this evidence. Sorry but she’s Not Good.”

Jack pulls him aside and is like “i know she’s your family but kid, she is not a good person.”

And mac is like “it’s not just that she’s my family, it’s that Gwen realized that what she was doing was wrong and tried to make amends.” to which jack is like “???? when??? I think I’d remember something like that” so mac has to exasperatedly explain to him that she changed back in mac’s original timeline.

Jack’s all “okay but this isn’t the original timeline” and then they get into an argument (they’re not mad at each other or anything, it’s honestly more like a debate) about how similar everyone is to mac’s original timeline. Mac mentions how literally everyone on the team is still normal and the same but then he starts to question it himself. Desi still has her same morals and everything, but it’s not like she’s the exact same. Neither is Russ, and somewhere out there Parker exists, but she never came to the Phoenix in this world.

The more Mac thinks about it the more he’s like “ohhhhh no. ohhhh fuck.” and then begins to question everything because hey why not give the man a lil existential crisis. Mac begins to wonder if he’s the one who has catastrophically screwed up the world beyond recognition or if it’s something else entirely- his only comfort is the knowledge that Mac didn’t have a choice in this, it’s not like he wanted to go back in time (though if given the choice he probably would’ve).

Anyway so Gwen has escaped and people are having weird memory dreams, and Mac just wishes they that could all go back to a couple of months ago when Mac had forgotten about the original timeline and everything was good and normal and dandy and everyone was alive and NOT having dream memory things. Buuuuut the fact of the matter is that they can’t go back in time, so Mac just has to figure out how to fix this and maybe figure out why people are having memory things happening while they sleep.

Mac, unfortunately, does not work well with theoretical science in any sense of the word. He much prefers the tangible parts of science (especially when they blow up). To Mac decides to get the entire team to help out. Riley starts trying to figure out if anything in the world was Not Quite Right when Mac got shot in the leg out in the forest and thus when he was randomly transported through space and time. Bozer and Leanna start to try and figure out how many people are having these dream/memory things while also staying on the downlow. Jack is just making sure that Mac is taking care of himself because he keeps having the headaches and jack doesn’t like it when his boy is hurting :( 

Mac also grapples with the fact that he’s going to have to tell Russ, Matty, and his dad (because oops James is still alive—i know this is my idea but like why couldn’t james stay dead. Mac is too good of a son for that to happen ik ik but STILL-), but at the same time he’s like “if i tell them they’re going to bench me and make me go through a psych eval” and nobody wants that to happen. On the other hand, James might be able to try and help figure out what exactly happened and how Mac got here.

Because the missions have slowed down for Mac and Jack, he has a lot of time to think about all of these things, and at some point he realizes that maybe he shouldn’t just be focusing on himself but also the other Mac. Because like. If he got magically transported to this timeline/universe, surely the mac that used to be here got put over there? And at first he agreed and thought that it was because the old mac here died when he was shot in the leg, so that makes sense that when he died in the hyperbaric chamber there would be some weird cosmic body swap or whatever. But. the more that mac thinks about it the less it makes sense.

If he died in the hyperbaric chamber he should’ve just done exactly that?? Died??? It doesn’t make sense that when he got transported to this timeline that he would be, if not well, then at least alive. So then Mac starts thinking about what if he didn’t actually die. What if his heart stopped and what if the old mac in this timeline also nearly died, but not quite?

There’s no way to prove this but Mac’s pretty sure this is what’s happening, but he also keeps it to himself. No reason to tell anyone if he can’t fully figure it out, simple as that. 

Also just as far as housekeeping goes, at this point mac basically has all of his memories of his past life back and honestly? He kind of wishes that he doesn’t. He’s all for the knowledge side of knowledge v ignorance, but not right now. He just wants to live in this better timeline and not have to think about the fact that he doesn’t technically belong here. And maybe that’s what it all comes down to- maybe he just doesn’t belong here.

It gets mac thinking about the other version of himself who might be in his original timeline—they’re both in the wrong place and mac feels guilty for taking the “better” life from… himself… it’s a weird thing to think about but one must not underestimate the guilt that mac can put on himself (in more ways than one?? Also literally??????)

So as much as Mac doesn’t want to, he starts thinking about how he can go back to his original timeline. It’s pretty obvious that he doesn’t belong here, and now all of the people around him are being affected by his presence. And sure right now it’s just dream memory things, but what if it gets worse? What if other problems start to crop up because he’s been parading around in a universe that he doesn’t belong to?

He doesn’t dare tell Jack or anyone, but Mac thinks about how he needs to find a way out of this world for the sake of himself and everyone around him. And that brings us to everyone’s favorite emotional whump: Mac purposely distancing himself from his team (cough cough FAMILY cough cough) because he thinks that this will somehow make it easier when he eventually figures out a way to leave.

Everyone is instantly on high alert because that is!!! That is concerning sir you should get that checked out, but mac over here thinks that he’s being sly and sneaky (he is not). Mac stops holding the post mission get togethers, and because he now lives alone mac mostly just stays inside the house and slaves away in an attempt to figure out what the hell he’s even doing in this universe in the first place. At some point Mac convinces himself that he doesn’t even deserve to be here, doesn’t deserve to take advantage of the fact that jack and leanna and charlie (and james and gwen ig) are alive, even though he’s the one in the first place who saved them.

The guilt begins piling on and on and mac is purposely not seeking out help because he does genuinely think that he’s the problem here even though he isn’t!!!! 

At some point Jack finally puts his foot down and is like “okay. This has. Got to stop. Son i love you why are you so sad now :(“ but Mac just puts up his shields and lies but at the same time he’s also like “i should spend as much time with Alive Jack as i can because back home jack is dead” so he’s in this weird position of wanting and not wanting to be near jack during all hours of the day.

ANYWAY plot time surprise there’s actually plot in this part 3: The phoenix eventually figures out where the hell Gwen went after she escaped and much to Mac’s dismay, it does in fact look like she’s up to no good again, and that she hasn’t turned over a new leaf like Mac kept saying she had. This does not bode well for mac’s mental health but like cmon what actually does in my fics.

Anyway the thing that Gwen is doing is meddling with the people who made the nanobots (aka she made an agreement with the US government that she’d help them do Nefarious Things™ in exchange for her freedom, so yes she didn’t escape by herself but in fact it was aided with the government) BUT none of the Phoenix know that because in this universe they never figured out that it was the US government that was controlling the nanobots and so the Phoenix never separated and so they’re still getting fed lies that the nanobots were some terror plan.

(Basically at the point of the nanobots in this timeline, mac had all but forgotten what happened in his original timeline, so he couldn’t give hints to the team. By the time he re-remembered what the deal was with the government and the bots, it was kind of the least of his problems)

So Mac nor the phoenix know what Gwen is up to, but they did just randomly spot her on a security camera/social media post/whatever because Riley has facial rec programs running trying to find her. Despite the fact that Jack and Mac haven’t been going on many missions, Matty knows that this one is going to be important to them (bc of Gwen’s relationship to mac, again, they have no idea that the nanobots are being controlled by the government or by gwen’s new aid), so she sends them along with the rest of their big happy team: Riley, Bozer, Desi, Leanna

They all go out on an adventure to find Gwen and the whole time Mac is just so rattled because he wants to remember Gwen by what she did in his universe, by her finals moments sacrificing herself knowing that Codex was wrong and that Hey Maybe Terrorism Is Bad, but he just can’t. This is a new timeline, new universe, new Gwen.

Mac is eventually the one to corner her and is like “you don’t have to do this, this isn’t who you are,” blah blah blah, but Gwen is having absolutely none of it and is instead like “uno reverse, this isn’t who you are, you can still be on the right side of things” and mac is like “???? bestie you are on the wrong side.”

Gwen gives some self righteous speech about what the history books will remember or some shit like that (idk man every tv villain does the same thing just think of one of the pre-existing villain speeches) and then is like “it doesn’t really matter what you want or don’t want to do, we can always just control you lol” and then nanobot time teehee.

Anyway Mac and Jack wake up later, no memory of what they’ve done bc nanobots, all they know is that it couldn’t have been good. While they’re trying to get to a phone and contact the Phoenix and also try and figure out what happened while they were under control, Jack is like “we need to get these things out. I’m not letting them [the us government] control us for any longer” and mac is geared up to argue bc the whole hyperbaric chamber death thing… but then internally he’s like “wait what if this is the way that can bring me back to my universe! Perfect!” so outwardly he’s like “oof yeah i suppose so :(“

When they finally get back to the phoenix (im stil in the process of thinking about what gwen made them do via the nanobots, please stand by lol), mac casually slips in the old hyperbaric chamber idea and everyone is kind of all “...last time we suggested that you kind of panicked. And by kind of i mean a lot” so mac just shrugs and convinces them that he has since done research and believes this is the best way.

And the thing is is that mac told everyone (even desi who he told first) that he came here bc he “died” or whatever in his universe, he didn’t exactly say how… just that he did. Nobody knows that it’s because of the chamber (and if i wrote in that they did shhhhhh just pretend that i didn’t lmao. Pretend that no one knows except mac right now). 

So they set up the chambers and jack is like “see you on the other side :)” and mac is like “hahahahahHAHAHAH YEP” and is super normal about it (he is not and everyone can see through it but also they don’t really know what exactly is going on.)

So. chamber, suffocation, bad things. The nanobots leave jack’s body but not mac’s and mac is like “ah perfect just like what happened in my universe but with riley” so he has great hopes that this will work. Things go dark just like they did in the original timeline, and he’s planning on closing his eyes and when he opens them he’ll be back home…

…with most of his friends dead. But it’s fine. It’s good it’s fine it’s dandy and it’s totally worth it.

(and it doesn’t end here but i need brainstorming time to think about whether or not i actually want this to work or not work. Hmm. hmmmmmm hmm hmmm. I literally do not know yet lol. But in the mean time i just want to say you all are amazing and wonderful and i cannot believe how many people found this silly little idea of mine interesting it honestly!!!! It blows my mind and warms my heart and i just wanted to say Thank You so so much. I love you all sm <3)

Who wants to read an essay about the strangest MacGyver fic idea I've had yet