#(Sonia does have some sweet style though)

[more-than-a-princess]

It might have been a disarming effect, but unfortunately for Sonia, it worked. They'd been apart for the better part of a year and yet he hadn't forgotten her tendency to care, perhaps even more than a situation needed. He also seemingly hadn't forgotten the curve her lips made when she frowned in worry, her smile turning upside down and drooping, his fingertip tracing over the lines that had formed.

Sonia sucked in a breath. It was good they were in public: it kept her from retaliating the way she wanted, something far more direct than polite conversation over a meal. "It wouldn't be a bad idea," She replied once the server had left. "But conversational Japanese will get you far in my country, even if French and Italian are the two native languages. Most citizens who are middle class and above will have elected to take Japanese language classes. And English, though that is taught in every school. What I've observed with foreigners is that plenty of Novosonians wish to practice their English or Japanese with them."

It could have been worse: he could've been fluent in something mostly unspoken, like Swedish, and then there would be even more to master just to be able to communicate with someone other than Sonia, a few members of her family, and various interpreters. She had what was left of the night to throw caution to the wind before she needed to focus on practicality, or rather facing everyone who thought her to be foolish or completely cracked, depending on the person asked.

Wylan, however, wasn't going to wait until morning. Sonia flinched mid-chew, but she waited until swallowing and setting down what was left of her burger on her plate before speaking. "But you didn't in the end, right?" She asked, wiping her fingers on a cloth napkin. She still preferred the knife and fork, but there was something meaningful about enjoying their meals the same way. Well, she was enjoying it: Wylan's enjoyment had fled, likely right around the time she'd made the decision to impulsively kiss him in a Las Vegas casino.

"You stayed. You could have left if you wanted, and I wouldn't have stopped you, but you stayed," She continued, her burger and wine now temporarily forgotten. Even the aligot would likely congeal at this rate, but none of them were as important as Wylan. Little, she realized, would ever be as important as he was. The problem was: he either didn't see it or didn't find himself worthy of it. "And it's not as if I make impulsive decisions, particularly ones that will greatly affect quite a few lives, as easily as I ordered dinner tonight."

"But I've spent nine months without you: time spent making an attempt at healing, doing everything my family has asked of me and more, and I can't say it's made me feel better. Rather, I felt worse. I've been worse off without you, though I've been reluctant to say that out loud until now." She had to thank the stars for a quiet section of the restaurant and her resolve not to indulge in more alcohol than she needed. For as easy as it was for Sonia to care about others and devote her life to protecting and supporting them, it was just as difficult to open up her own heart, still raw and uncertain, and place every card she had on the table.

"You could lie, you could disappear just as easily as you did last time, but I also know that if I didn't take a chance on us when the opportunity was given that I'd regret it, likely for the rest of my life. You're a newly-former assassin and I'm the crown princess of one of the last absolute monarchies on Earth. Wylan, I don't think anything between us could never not be weird."

She smiled, torn between joy and amusement now. He did the mischievous smirk far better than she did, but that didn't mean she'd stop making an attempt. "I've spent the better part of my twenty-five years trying desperately to be normal, to fit in. Maybe it's time I embrace the fact I don't? And frankly, I don't think there's anyone better to share such a weird life with than the person sitting across from me. All I'd ask is for you to want to try it, at the very least. I won't lie and say it'll be easy: I predict there will be plenty of ugliness in the way. But you, and we, are worth it."

And speaking of being in a Paris restaurant, it would be remiss if she didn't at least finish her drink. Not that she was in any rush, but she took what she thought to be a well-deserved sip. "Anyway, I'd rather be weird, forgive you, choose to trust you, and put myself out of self-imposed misery than the alternative. Perhaps even with a small dessert to top it off, and some rest. I'd wager we both could use that."

The first hurdle already. Making promises. Is it really a hurdle? Should it be that serious? It’s not as though her requests were unreasonable. She had every right to be concerned outside of his own well being. Should things go south how easy would it be for those former ‘benefactors’ to trace him back to Sonia? Presumably the last thing Novoselic wanted was for the prince (no not prince you’re a consort or something) to be held ransom by Russian kingpins. Or simply killed and smeared with as a result. Lovely.

Also awful topic for a dinner table?

“I promise. Not to keep you out if I need you.” Wylan concedes. “But the menu will be another thing. I’ve been fasting! Which is different from starving. My tendencies to splurge junk food aside I’m actually good at this, you know. I’ve had—uh, jobs—where I had no choice but to hold out for a lot longer than this. Cute that you’re worried. I like the face you make when you do it, there’s a little curve around your smile. Yeah… right around here.” He reaches across the table, tracing part of her lip before he sits back with a smirk.

Yes, this is absolutely a disarming deflect. But Wylan did make the important promise! Points are earned for that.

“Maybe I should learn French.” He mutters to himself, arms folded and polite smile given to the waiter as Sonia plays her tongue in that foreign language in a way that has Wylan grinning. Even so, something continues to simmer in the back of his mind. Behind the flirting and the smiling and even more flirting questions bubbled and frothed. Or maybe that twist in his gut really was hunger? Toleration of it being empty is one thing but trying to think so hard on it was another.

The masterwork of a burger is only a temporary distraction, but maybe it’s apparent on his face that he’s not fully indulging himself anymore in the splendor of their reunion. Apprehension has taken its hold and holds him back from it like restraints. Or maybe it’s holding him up? Holding him down? When you’re floating in the air it’s hard to tell which direction the ground is.

“Sonia…” He begins finally, after toasting the burger in a ridiculous show (and even that wasn’t enough to fully shine the smile again). “Isn’t this… agh. I dunno. I haven’t�� done this before. It’s a first. This. Us. But it’s fast, right? A few hours ago I was ready to re cut you out of my life and you thought I was gone. Now we’re in a Paris restaurant well after dark and…” His expression deepens, this is stupid after all. He knows off the bat that not only is he at odds with himself, but Sonia likely would shoot it down entirely.

But that doesn’t feel right?!

“Shouldn’t you be … I dunno, apprehensive?! What if I’m lying or what if something actually goes wrong. You just… forgave me. And then we made out. I mean come on that’s weird, isn’t it? It felt amazing, don’t get me wrong! But… it’s weird.”

[deva-arts]

Hey Deva. what do your OC's mouths taste like.

I'M HAUNTED BY MY WORDS...

But okay sure fine I'll answer

First off we have a headcanon from Ritz:

Scrumptious!

Okay here's what I think:

Seraphina: She might not be too romantic, but she has excellent hygiene and doesn't go making out with Nathaniel without being nicely fresh. "It's basic courtesy to brush your teeth for a minute and thirty seconds before each kiss, Nathaniel. I would have it no other wa- ack- wait-" He really doesn't care and will try to sneak in more than a few sweet moments between work regardless. She'd like to say she's not a fan of canoodling during a tight schedule... But she loves that shit.

All this to say she probably tastes like mint. Or just a clean mouth. Sometimes energy drinks.

Nathaniel: Nathaniel is a doctor, but before that he was quite the playboy! Nate's pretty seasoned in the art of romance, especially since he's lived through so many different appearances. (He has to mind the teeth a little now that he is exclusively using this form, though...) He's always keeping nice with cologne and clean clothes, going a little extra on the mouthwash, etc.... Unless he is burning himself out doctor-style, then he... Just tries to keep himself showered and his teeth brushed.

Nathaniel tastes like mouthwash or breath fresheners when he's a spry rooster looking to woo Ser... But when he's tired he just tastes like mouth. He just wants some love. Please. (She stays in that day.)

Sonia!

Sonia makes sure her lips are fruit flavored so that her kisses can be "An experience that'll always make you crave me." Okay Sonia. But to be fair, she is a good kisser. Not only does she smell nice, her chemical synthesis ability essentially sterilizes and monitors the processes in her body, including harmful bacteria in the mouth. She would pleasantly surprise Nate if he ever needed to test a swab.

She tastes like cherry lipstick, the taste in your mouth you get right after brushing your teeth a third time, with a hint of something... lightly spicy? You find out later that it's acid.

Vincent! I'm not looking forward to writing this one WOOO

Vincent is an extremely... Meticulous individual. But only for certain things. For others he has no conceptual foundation and thus does not consider or practice them. He will shower three times a day. He brushes his teeth until his gums bleed. He bites his nails down to nubs.

But he will not moisturize, or do maintenance for the plentiful amounts of scar tissue on his body. His skin is rough and textured differently with every square inch you come across. His lips are chapped my guy. They're chapped bad. He smells a little weird too. Like feathers and gasoline, covered poorly with a plentiful amount of body spray. He also doesn't floss and eats anything under the sun.

His mouth tastes like the aftertaste whatever edible or inedible object he's eaten, with a hint of oral decay. He's a bad kisser the first few goes around too. His idea of cuddling is some rough pats on your back that feel more like the heimlich maneuver. Let's hope you caught him after he's brushed his teeth, at least.

(Human Vincent tastes like Cigarettes, beer, and whatever candy he popped in his mouth in hopes of ridding the taste of ciggies and beer.)

Amon:

The first occupational hazard lies in his teeth. They're very sharp. He has bitten off his own tongue before in several occasions. OW??? The second lies in his nice, plush yet firm body being a MUSCLE DEATHTRAP where he might squeeze you a little too hard and save you money on your next chiropractic appointment. (Actually, maybe still go to the chiropractor.) After that? He's a great kisser. He practices good hygiene (he has to lead Adra by example!) and smells like body spray used tastefully.

Amon tastes like a minty, mouthwashed mouth with a hint of copper. You try not to think about it too hard.

Eric!!

His mouth tastes like... Nothing? And not like mouth-nothing, more like water-nothing. His ability as a state-shifter makes all of the cells in his body convert into the cellular equivalent of a sea salp. Even though his humanoid form keeps these aspects of his body in a dormant state, where they process and function like normal, the green parts still retain that odd texture and quality to them. Of course, if he eats or drinks something that tastelessness is going to change.

Eric might also taste like pizza, cheap alcohol, toothpaste, or... lime Cool Aide?

Strohl!

Kissing a man who is basically a living electrical generator is not a good idea??? He tastes and feels like television static, and sometimes you hear some sparks actually flying on his end. He assures you that he has it under control, but in the same breath tells you not to surprise him if you wear conductive jewelry. Okay. This is fine.

Some say they like the feel of the static. Others take their leave early. He can't really blame them, so they leave, their NDA signed and a digital check bestowed to them. Katya is the first woman who was entirely immune to his power, and that made him feel much more secure with holding her close.

Strohl tastes like TV static, expensive liquor, and whatever dessert he's eaten earlier. He's a fan of sweets despite his workout regimen not permitting them.

Honorable mentions:

Titan tastes like blood,

Cain tastes like raw flesh and he will bite your tongue,

Karin Eris tastes like black licorice and your tears,

General Hayes tastes like your pillow and you realize it was, in fact, your pillow,

Aurelius tastes like a clean mouth that is getting a bit too high in temperature and oh god his power is on- TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!!

Farmer Dev tastes like those crisp root vegetables that have no implicit taste but are still classified as "green" tasting. Also peppermint- she chews a lot of it on the go.

[despairs-memorial]

Why the hell not. I know we have a lot of pairings so don’t worry about doing all of them, but do whichever!

I may regret it, but let's do them all! o(^o^)o

Name: Yuzuki Maizono/Tsumiki

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Light indigo hair and lilac eyes, wears a lot of cute, stylish clothes

Personality: Very sweet and a little timid. Very cautious about how she appears without being obsessed with it.

Special Talents: People reading, Styling, and Social media management

Who they like better: Mikan

Who they take after more: Sayaka

Personal Head canon: Gets into strange obsessions from time to time that she drops as easily as she gets into them. She's easily influenced by things that are gaining popularity or starts things like that, probably a little spoiled.

Face Claim: Mikan and Sayaka fankid

----

Name: Anri Nevermind

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Long blonde hair and purple eyes like Mikan. Often wears black

Personality: A quirky girl that is very interested in dead things and gore. She has a bad habit of keeping small bones that she finds and scares the servants with them. Can put together whole skeletons like puzzles.

Special Talents: anatomy and physiology, horror movie trivia

Who they like better: Mikan

Who they take after more: Sonia

Personal Head canon: It's Sonia's fault while she's like that, but Mikan enables her more so than Sonia does, but she's rather well behaved whenever it's required of her.

Face Claim: Sonia and Mikan

----

Name: Misao Oowada

Gender: Male

General Appearance: Black hair and purple eyes, but he dyes his hair like his dad did in the past. Often has bandages on his arms or face.

Personality: A rather abrasive boy that is actually very loyal and friendly once people get to know him. Secretly very concerned about people around him.

Special Talents: First aid, Fighting, Dog training.

Who they like better: Mikan

Who they take after more: Mondo

Personal Head canon: He's pretty protective of his mother and tries to model himself after his dad to protect her, but he's more scared of getting Mikan angry than Mondo.

Face Claim: Mondo and Mikan

----

Name: Evelyn Nevermind

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Light brown hair and green eyes, cute but nothing really notable.

Personality: A pretty normal girl that tries her best to do what is expected of her. She's polite and clever, but she does worry a lot about her future.

Special Talents: Knowing what cutlery is for what, Novoselin history and culture, People pleasing

Who they like better: Sonia

Who they take after more: Hajime

Personal Head canon: She's the second born kid in the polycule, so while she's worried about potentially ruling some other country, Sonia really just wants her to do what makes her happy. Very bad at French, but good at the other languages that she's required to learn.

Face Claim: Hajime and Sonia

----

Name: Mikado Tanaka

Gender: Male

General Appearance: Keeps his brown hair long and makes sure it covers one of his eyes. Keeps an eye patch on, but he doesn't need it.

Personality: Keeps to himself quite a bit, but he has a strong connection to animals that are commonly kept as pets.

Special Talents: Pet therapy, Animal training, Animal caretaking videogames

Who they like better: Gundham

Who they take after more: Hajime

Personal Head canon: Kind of finds Gundham's way of talking annoying whenever he tries it, so he just tries to mimic his style. Claims to talk to animals, but no one, not even Gundham, is sure if he actually can or is just saying he can. Likes playing farming sims with Hajime quite a bit.

Face Claim: Hajime and Gundham

----

Name: Anthea Nevermind

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Dresses as though she's a witch quite a lot. Long black and white hair due to inherited poliosis. Has her mother's eyes.

Personality: Quirky and fun. Has a soft spot for her familiar above all other animals, and she seems to actually believe in magic.

Special Talents: Magician tricks, Animal training, Occult practices

Who they like better: Gundham

Who they take after more: Sonia

Personal Head canon: She has a softspot for sunflowers since her name was inspired by them. She keeps herbs, candles, and crystals in her room to perform simple spells, but they don't really do anything.

Face Claim: Sonia and Gundham

----

Name: Takara Ishimaru

Gender: Male

General Appearance: Short black hair and bright red eyes. Eyes are smaller and eyebrows are thinner than Kiyotaka's and more reminiscent of Mondo's.

Personality: He's rather harsh and can be rather annoyed when it comes to inefficient methods. If he can cut a corner while getting the same result, he will. Work smarter, not harder mindset.

Special Talents: Analysis

Who they like better: Kiyotaka

Who they take after more: Kiyotaka

Personal Head canon: He gets his mindset more from Mondo while keeping similar habits as Kiyotaka. He's good at fighting, too, so he often gets in trouble for accidentally starting fights by saying the wrong thing to the wrong person.

Face Claim: Kiyotaka and Mondo

----

Name: Aiko Ishimaru

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Long light brown hair and green eyes. Takes after Nagito quite a bit in looks.

Personality: Gets easily obsessed with people, especially the talented and celebrated, but she tempers it by focusing more on those that worked hard to get their fame and honing their talents rather than those that just use their talents to breeze by.

Special Talents: Analysis, Studying, Celebrity trivia

Who they like better: Kiyotaka

Who they take after more: Nagito

Personal Head canon: Kiyotaka is extremely worried about her future, but since she keeps her grades up and is a lot smarter than she acts like she is, he doesn't really have an excuse to make her stop.

Face Claim: Kiyotaka and Nagito

----

Name: Narumi Ishimaru

Gender: Female

General Appearance: Long black hair and green eyes. Sometimes has bags under her eyes due to staying up studying or reading too late.

Personality: A very quiet girl that's passionate about her studies and folklore. She's pretty curious about the world around her and really loves learning about it through novels.

Special Talents: Folklore knowledge, Ancient language studies

Who they like better: Kiyotaka

Who they take after more: Naoko

Personal Head canon: She tends to take naps with Naoko and doesn't like being alone. Carries around a plush toy that Chiyo gave her after she was born around with her at all times. Due to her poor sleep schedule, she always feels a little cold and wears a jacket at all times.

Face Claim: Kiyotaka and Naoko

----

Name: Hayato Tanaka

Gender: Male

General Appearance: Messy brown hair and grey eyes. Always wears a faded red scarf and often has a bird on his shoulder.

Personality: Like his parents, he puts on a persona, but instead of settling on a villain or a hero, he fancies himself more of an anti-hero. He has a strong interest in birds, more so than any other animal, much to Gundham's dismay.

Special Talents: Ornithology, Tree climbing

Who they like better: Gundham

Who they take after more: Raijin

Personal Head canon: He has a pet bird that he likes the most that he calls Ace. He's good with all animals, but birds interest him the most because they can fly. He can't swim.

Face Claim: Gundham and Raijin

----

Name: Maria Nevermind

Gender: female

General Appearance: Long blond hair that's put in braids and ocean blue eyes. While her hair is always elegantly done, she dresses rather tomboyishly to the point that no one would guess that she's a young princess.

Personality: Rough and tumble, and she tends to speak with vulgar language not befitting of someone of her station. However, she is a very kindhearted, honest, and noble person at heart.

Special Talents: Combat, Sailing, Exploring

Who they like better: Mizumi

Who they take after more: Sonia

Personal Head canon: She's actually very well versed in everything that she's supposed to learn as the heir to the throne of Novoselic, but she really wants to be more like Mizumi and rule the seas instead of ruling the small country she calls home.

Face Claim: Sonia and Mizumi

[transbian-uprising]

Some of my own Danganronpa non-despair AU headcanons/imagines this time! (THH edition)

I was inspired, so I decided why not write down some headcanons/imagines/character adjustments for my Danganronpa non-despair AU! I’m gonna be doing this as a series, starting with the THH characters, then the SDR2 characters, then the V3 characters (although I will mention characters from other games in my headcanons). Enjoy!

Makoto Naegi | 苗木誠

He’d definitely lend a listening ear to whoever wanted to vent to him.

When he first comes to Hope’s Peak, he’s such a fanboy over everyone

He has an inferiority complex and self worth issues because he’s surrounded by insanely talented students, but Sayaka and Kyoko quickly help him get over that

He’s pretty good at keyboard, and plays alongside Sayaka a lot

He actually got noticed by Kaede, who offered to teach him, which obviously he was ecstatic about

He’s the only one in Class 78th, and possibly all of Hope’s Peak, who is neurotypical

Sayaka Maizono | 舞園さやか

Her and Makoto are basically best friends

She’s still a total cinnamon roll, but she loves to play little pranks on the rest of Class 78th and have a good laugh over it

She, Ibuki, Leon and Kaede tried to form a music group together but they fell apart really quickly due to their different styles

She has a huge crush on Makoto, but she’s afraid to admit it

Leon Kuwata | 桑田怜恩

He’s almost always the only one in class, just so he can avoid playing baseball

Ibuki taught him guitar and he’s been playing nonstop ever since

He *tries* to get along with Sayaka, but prefers hanging out with Ibuki since they almost always end up playing together

Everyone in Class 78 calls him the Ultimate Guitarist because... reasons

Toko Fukawa | 腐川冬子

She doesn’t have the weird thing for Byakuya in this au

She doesn’t slut shame the girls either

She’s still really shy tho

She initially dislikes Hifumi for writing fanfic, but they eventually bond over their mutual love for writing

She’s also close with Tsumugi, and the two of them collaborated to write a book that was loosely based on Tsumugi’s favorite anime

Genocider Syo is friends with Sonia, but she’s a bit put off by Sonia’s obsession with her and other serial killers

Kiyotaka Ishimaru | 石丸清多夏

Initially, the rest of the class shys away from him because he has a stick up his ass about the rules, but Mondo and Chihiro quickly befriend him

After a while, he loosens up a bit, but he never stops being the Ultimate Moral Compass

He tries to bond with the class by telling jokes, but he’s always super awkward with it and is usually unsuccessful

He’s SUPER gullible — he’ll believe anything anyone tells him, and you better believe Class 78 uses that to their advantage

Once, he dyed his hair white on a dare, and ended up liking it and kept it that way

He also tries to do impressions of his classmates (mostly Mondo) but, again, is painfully bad at it

Everyone actually finds these funny tho

Mondo Oowada | 大和田紋土

He, surprisingly, likes to play card games, which everyone was shocked to find out

Except Celeste, who is fascinated by his interest

He’s very protective of his friends, and will do anything for them

Especially Taka and Chihiro, his two best friends

He’s an amazing hairstylist, and secretly loves to play with and style people’s hair

Everyone in all of Hope’s peak knows to go to him for hair care tips and tricks

He also taught Chihiro how to ride a motorcycle the two of them rode around together a lot, until Taka ratted them out

He still hasn’t forgiven Taka for that

Chihiro Fujisaki | 不二咲千尋

In this au, he’s a bit more open about his gender, but still has loads of insecurities

At first, he’s completely in the closet, but after rumors spread online about him being a boy, he decides to live as himself and goes to Mondo for help

Mondo became his first real friend to him because of this, and him (and eventually Sakura too) helped him become strong

Eventually, he became an honorary member of Mondo’s gang and would often hang out with them in his free time

His hidden talent is being a voice actor, but he’s super embarrassed to talk about it since he’s the Ultimate Programmer

His first voice role was in a video game he developed himself, which led some talent scouts to notice him

He eventually voiced in several anime and video games, some of which he also helped develop

He’s almost as passionate about acting as he is about programming, but the only people he feels comfortable talking about it to are Hifumi and Tsumugi, who both become huge fans of his, and Mondo and Taka

When he found out Junko had created Monokuma, he was fascinated and offered to help her with ironing out all his kinks

He, Chiaki, Mukuro and Miu also created the Exisals in this au, for the sole reason of fooling around

Although, Chihiro himself was a bit intimidated by his creation at first, but after Tsumugi and Junko pressured him to try one out for himself, he fell in love

Yasuhiro Hagakure | 葉隠康比呂

He’s less of a dumbass in this AU, although he still has a tendency to get himself in sticky situations

Celeste and Hifumi played a prank on him by getting him to dress up in the Robo Justice suit and go around scaring people, but it backfired after Hiro fell down the stairs and broke his leg

Being the only one in the class who can, he often buys wine for Celeste and Mondo (and whoever asks, but only those two ever do)

He and Mondo use the same hair gel, so sometimes he’d take Mondo’s without knowing, which would lead to some awkward misunderstandings

Interestingly, he once predicted the world would end and they’d all end up dead, but that never ended up happening

That’s where the “30% accurate” thing came from— before that he was almost always right

He constantly makes jokes about being an old man (even though he’s only in his early twenties)

Hifumi Yamada | 山田一二三

He’s no longer solely attracted to anime characters, but he still loves them very much

He’s also nicer in this au

He’s besties with Tsumugi, and they bond over their love of anime and fiction

He’s also a huge fan of Chihiro’s, after he found out Chihiro was on the development team for his favorite game AND voiced two of his favorite anime characters

Low key has a crush on Celeste

Angie constantly makes jokes about how his first name is just “one two three” in Japanese

Whenever he’s watching an anime Chihiro was in, he’ll hound him with questions about what it was like recording, which Chihiro doesn’t mind because he doesn’t get to talk about his voice work a lot

Someday he wants to write and direct his own anime, and Tsumugi and Toko give him a lot of writing tips

He formed a LARP group with Gundham, Tsumugi, Chihiro, Junko, and Kaito

Celestia Ludenberg

She doesn’t treat Hifumi like a servant in this AU, but she’s still mean af and has a superiority complex

She eventually revealed her true identity to the class after she got inspired by Chihiro, but it didn’t change anything with her classmates

Except Hiro, who constantly made jokes about them having the same name, much to Celeste’s annoyance

She occasionally brings Grand Bois Chéri Ludenberg to school with her, but she doesn’t let anyone except Hifumi, Sonia and Gundham pet him

She high-key has a crush on Sonia

She doesn’t actually know how to do her own hair, so she has to get Mondo to do it for her

Sakura Oogami | 大神さくら

She and Tenko become friends SO QUICKLY because of their shared passion for martial arts

She’s still friends with Aoi tho

The three of them hang out together a lot

She and Tenko developed a new form of martial arts combining Neo-Aikido and Sakura’s own style, which they named the Oogami Method

Junko bullied her because of her ripped uniform, but after she explained that nothing would fit her, Junko offered to have one made for her

Kyoko Kirigiri | 霧切響子

She and Shuichi are very close, obviously

She gives Shuichi a lot of pointers on improving his investigative skills, and they work together often to solve cases

She and Makoto still become close, but their friendship is overshadowed by her and Shuichi’s

She notices this after a while, and makes a concerted effort to spend more time with Makoto

She’s less distant in this AU, but she still tries not to show her emotions

Her hair is naturally black in this AU, she dyed it purple after she lost a bet (with Celeste)

Aoi Asahina | 朝日奈葵

In this AU, she doesn’t just love donuts, but she loves all sweets

She was a fan of Junko’s before coming to Hope’s Peak, and the two of them became friends quickly

She and Akane are also close, and everyone jokes that they’re sisters, though in reality they aren’t

She once got recruited by Kaito to be in a play his class was putting on, but she’s such a terrible actor that they gave her part to Junko

She once walked in on Junko and Mukuro testing out Monokuma for the first time, and they were super freaked out, but Aoi was fascinated and wanted to try controlling him

Mukuro was against it, but Junko was cool with it, so she got to in the end

Byakuya Togami | 十神白夜

He and Makoto are both obsessed with true crime, and the two of them actually become friends because of that

They both love digging into Hope’s Peak’s files and his family’s files to find mysteries they could try and solve

Sonia joins them a lot too

He unofficially became the class’s French teacher after they found out he was fluent

He’s nicer in this au, and he’s kind of the dad of the class

When the Imposter was impersonating him, the two of them got into a little mini-war over who was the superior Togami (Twogami surprisingly won that war, albeit barely)

Mukuro Ikusaba | 戦刃むくろ

She’s away from Hope’s Peak A LOT, usually doing soldier things

When she is at Hope’s Peak, she spends most of her time either developing new weapons or looking after Junko

She’s usually the one who has to clean up after Junko’s shenanigans, even though she partakes in them herself

She helps Junko with a lot of her projects, but usually she ends up working on her own things while Junko does her thing

Despite this, she loves working with her sister when she gets the chance

Her proudest achievement is the Exisals, even though she collaborated with Chihiro, Chiaki and Miu to create them

Junko Enoshima | 江ノ島盾子

While she’s obviously not Ultimate Despair in this au, she’s still very chaotic and loves causing shenanigans and playing (mostly) harmless pranks

She’s friends with Sayaka and Kokichi because of this (both she and Sayaka are members of D.I.C.E. too)

She still puts on different personas, but she does it as a joke

She’s actually a very good actress, and she loves to act, but just like Chihiro, that gets overshadowed by her Ultimate talent

She loves to build and create things, just like her sister, which is why she created Monokuma

She uses Monokuma for her pranks a lot

Sometimes she goes through severe depressive episodes where she doesn’t have the energy to leave her home, but she usually uses Monokuma as a sort of telepresence unit so she can still talk to her friends

At first, no one knew that Monokuma was her, but Aoi ended up spilling the beans

She also learned animation from Ryota, and wants to make an anime starring her, Kaito, Tsumugi, Chihiro, Mukuro and Hajime

She loves to share her projects with her friends, and often lets other people control Monokuma or model for her

She gets hurt a LOT, and usually Mikan has to care for her

Her proudest achievement is replacing the Exisals’ weapons with water guns (even though Mukuro did most of the work)

They actually decided to leave them like that afterwards, since the Exisals were only ever used by her friends to mess around in

She suffers from PTSD, and part of that is recurring nightmares that the world ended and all her friends were forced to kill each other

[olimpias]

Introducing a storyless OC: Janice

Meet one of my dearest and most secret children: Janice or as her friends call her: Jan (pronounced Jen)

Since I love her very much and have carried her around in my brain for some time, I have now decided to share her with you all! Please treat her kindly, she is more fragile than she wants you to think!

basic information

full name: Janice Fiordiligi Ardizzone

orientation: cis girl (she/her), biromantic demisexual

age: currently 22

birthday: December 7 1998

nationality: british-swiss-italian

occupation: aspiring prima ballerina, instagram cosplayer

height: c. 5’2 (160 cm)

weight: 41 kg

eyes: dark blue

hair: black, curly, chest length

rough biography

was shoved off to a dancing school at age 3 bc her parents were always busy. Little did they know what would come of it

went to school in Naples until she was 7, afterwards moved to Paris w her parents

Stayed there until she was 13, studied at the Paris Opera Ballet School as one of the exceptional talents of the school (danced the part of young Clara in The Nutcracker when she was 12)

then moved to Moscow, was accepted into the Moscow State Academy of Choreography (the Bolshoi Ballet Academy)

taught by famous ex-prima ballerina Sonia Lyutenkova who also became her tutor and sort of new mother since her parents were constantly travelling around the world bc of her father’s job (whatever that may be)

her first bigger role was one of the little swans in Swan Lake when she was 17 and had to step in for an older ballerina who got sick

was noticed by the company and given bigger roles, her breakthrough being the part of Marguerite Gautier in a junior production of La Dame Aux Camélias

a ballerina at the Bolshoi since June 2019

personal information

the snarkiest person in the room. Literally and always.

very dark humour, sometimes even a bit inappropriate

doesn’t get along with her mum, they are both girlbosses™

loves her father even though they don’t see each other much

always has to take care of her cousin Amadeo who is two years older and a complete disaster (alcohol, drugs and so on). Granted, his mother died when he was 10 (also from alcohol poisoning) and he never knew his father, lived with his and Janice’s grandparents in Sicily now

does cosplays on Instagram, mostly historical personalities and makes all the costumes herself

super invested in her career, even if it doesn’t look like it

very good at hiding her feelings, seems almost indifferent at times

describes her style as “gay cowboy witch”

strong marxist and atheist tendencies (got that from Sonia Lyutenkova who is a committed communist)

sometimes says very (unintentionally) unsettling things like for example loves to talk about mummies and corpses at the dinner table

is the bro friend

really and she means really really doesn’t want to be in a relationship bc she is afraid of losing her independence

except sometimes she wants to be in a relationship. Or actually all the time secretly. the only thing is that she hates people except some and she finds them stupid and immature

sometimes she just really wants to marry some old classy rich dude who is more like her guardian and who’s just sweet and funny, then dies and leaves her everything

and sometimes she wants to run away with a stylish assassin or thief and be a super cool moll

oh also she would have had a little sister but she was born dead and that’s something that has traumatised her till this day

so all in all yes. She has issues™️

sorry for this very long intro, I just love her very much and now you know about her :)))))))))))

taglist under the cut (ask to be +/-)

general taglist: @wherewindysurgeswend @nightingale-keats @bookphobe @write-gallagher @sadsentinel @aphaimaniis @tragediesoftory @ortolon @euphoniouspandemonium

[vdragon-creations]

More Danganronpa Headcanons!

Why? Because I can! And I have to wait for a Commissioner to get back to me about a WIP I just sent!

I Think I’m gunna try my hands at making some Headcanons for Mondo, Ishimaru, Leon, Kazuichi, and Kiibo this time a round! Just cause I wanna try and explore new characters. (And totally not because I fell hard for a certain Robo Boi! WHAAAAAAAT! YOU CRAZY GURL!) I’m still loyal to my man Yasuhiro! But I gotta spred the love! Cause these boi’s need it! Also, wanna mention that these are more like...Non-Killing Game AU Headcanaons. So yeah! ^^ 

Let’s do this!

Mondo:

Is a Semi decent carpenter, but there was that one time he fucked up the legs on a chair, and now one of Asahina’s shorts has a rip in it where there was a stray nail sticking out.

She wont let him live that down. And neither will Sakura.

Get’s pretty embarrassed/pissed off if someone touches his neck! The dude’s jacket practically covers that entire part of his body, so he’s not used to feeling anything touch him there!

He once let out a girlish scream when Leon poked him there once to wake him up during class! The rest of them are surprised Leon wasn’t killed right then and there.

Once he participated in a little competition between the classes to see who was the arm wrestling champ. He got pretty far till he had to go up against Gonta. He lost by a landslide, but he felt better loosing to a dude like him at least. 

Totally escorts any female classmate or student home on his bike if they ask, or he sees some creep hanging around them. 

He does get embarrassed about it though, and ends up yelling at them. This results in one of three things.

The girl runs away!

The girl just politely declines, and walks away kinda creeped out!

Or a mix of all, with the addition of the dude sees this, and get’s spooked himself, and fucks off

Ishimaru:

Has a bit of a panic attack and dies inside if he sees someone leaving the men’s restroom without washing their hands!

Carries scented hand sanitizers with him! At all times! No matter what! And must offer some to every single one of his classmates! 

Once he tripped in the halls while chasing after another rule breaker, and had to be carried to the nurse’s office. Now that alone wouldn’t have been a bad thing, except Sakura was the one who did it, and she carried him bridle style, much to his dismay. 

Mondo and Leon teased him about that one for months.

During Christmas, he’ll start screeching about PDA anytime he sees a Mistletoe, or people under it who are about to kiss! 

But will ultimately be the first one forced to stand underneath it by is classmates.

Stays behind after school hours to either clean, or poke his head into every class room to see if the teachers need help with anything.

He’s totally that guy who during the Gym Class or Sports festival, is bitching about how short the girls shorts are, but not realize he’s staring. There by making HIM the creep! 

Leon of all people was the one to point this out to him, only adding to the shame.

Leon:

It’s not hard for him to start catching feelings for basically any girl meets.

Totally has an Instagram where he posts shirtless pics! He’s pretty popular thanks to that, and his Baseball Skills.

Purposely taught himself English so he could flirt with some of the American and British chicks who visit his profile and leave comments.

He’s pretty used to going from girl to girl, so it’s safe to assume he’s used to getting dunked on by the girls he’s dumped. Getting called a pig, dirty looks, even some of them going so far as to pour their drinks on them at lunch. This he can handle!

Wanted so badly to start a band with Sayaka, Ibuki, Kaede, and Kazuichi! (Probably due to the punk look Soda always puts on!) But he was promptly let down by all of them! Cause Ibuki had her own shit to deal with, Kazuichi because he had no experience with music (at least any good ones, Stay tuned for that! ;3), Sayaka cause she’s already part of a group, and Kaede because punk wasn’t exactly her thing.

But what really stresses him out is when one of his Exes just.....doesn’t really seem to care! It feels so outta place to him, and it actually makes him pretty paranoid. Wondering if their plotting for revenge or some shit! So he’ll spend days after breaking up with a girl like this, just kinda....being a little bitch! XD

Secretly, I’m pretty sure they all turned him down because they thought he was coming on to them to a degree. 

Kazuichi:

Is a lot like Yasuhiro, he doesn’t like birds, but not because he thinks they work for the government. It’s because he doesn’t like most animals, they remind him of Gundham.

Miu makes him HIGHLY uncomfortable! Sure, she’s hot and stuff, but she’s a whole other level of fuckery that he wants no part of! She’s banned from entering his workshop, and so Kiibo is usually the one who comes in to grab something if Miu needs it. He completely get’s Kazuichi feeling put off by Miu.

However, Kazuichi is still pretty insistent on asking Kiibo if he can take him apart every time he comes to get something for Miu. Making the poor robot very uncomfortable!

He’s pretty jealous that Miu get’s to play with the Robot and he doesn’t. Get’s kinda salty about it.

Teruteru once gave him the idea that he should try to serenade Sonia. And so he did! Or at least he tried to. He got over the fence to the girls dorms, ripping his clothes in the prosses. Then when he got to the window (he thought was) of Sonia’s room, he threw a rock that was a bit too big at it, cracking the window and scaring the girl in the room! Waking up the whole dorms and he booked it out of there! 

He attempted this one more time, and was better prepared. But Sonia opened her window to see a Kazuichi dressed in a Ghillie Suit and wearing an army helmet holding a guitar! When he started to sing and play, it was now obvious why Ibuki refuses to let him sing along with any of her music! 

A girl from a neighboring room called the campus security to repot a strange dude outside the Girls dorms, while another one poked her head out of her window and began to throw things at him. 

He left soon after, but was caught by security and reprimanded. Now he refuses to listen to Teruteru has to say about anything.  

Kiibo:

Often get’s bossed around by Mui to get her things. He finds it rather degrading, but when she’s not being bossy, she’s helpful to him. So he puts up with it, as a way of saying thanks. 

One of these tasks he’s asked to do a lot is going over to Kazuichi’s Workshop to barrow tools and such. He hates doing it though, since Kazuichi is always wanting to take him apart. So he does his best to make these visits quick!

Miu gave him the ability to remove some of his heavy armor so he can wear clothing like normal. Surprisingly, This was his idea! He wanted to be able to enjoy the comforts of soft fabrics like most humans. And it would help him blend in a bit better.

Gonta and him get along very well! Mainly due to both of them having a hard time understanding things like sarcasm, harsher jokes, and certain social cues. This usually leads to them both learning at the same time when they hang out!

Miu is his wingman, weather he knows it or not! She’s always wanting to add new functions to him to make him more appealing. One of these is a thin velvet like coating on his armor that’s meant to make his metal less harsh on the skin if you touch him.

Another one of these features is a type of diffuser at the top of his skull under his hair! It releases a pleasant scent into his hair, similar to pheromones. The scent changes based on Kiibo’s emotions. 

Kokichi likes to openly mock Kiibo in front of new people. Like a lot!

Kiibo actually releases steam when he get’s too Angry or Embarrassed, but this is really rare. 

Get’s really curious about Occult, Paranormal, or Religious things. Sure, he finds some of it to be very silly, but he can’t help but wonder why some humans like those things! 

Some holiday traditions he finds weird too, and in some cases, a bit Robophobic. Like giving candy or sweets out on Valentines Day, when....well, he can’t fucking eat it! So he feels excluded in times like that.

He’s really confused about most PDA! Especially kissing! So humans just like...put their mouths together? And that’s like....supposed to mean deep affection? What’s so great about swapping fluids like that? Couldn’t they get sick? QUESTIONS! ANSWERS! HE MUST HAVE THEM!

His Ahoge doesn’t just change shape and move to show emotion, but it also tends to point in the direction that he’s attention is drawn too. Even when he’s trying to pretend he’s not looking at something! His hair is a dead give away!

Has a built in “Cellphone” in his head. Miu added it so it would be easier to contact him if needed. 

Everyone in his class has his number, except Kokichi! And it will stay that way!

.......Until Gonta gave it to him by being tricked into doing it!

And now he has a small panic attack every time his “Cellphone” rings. Praying to all that is good that he doesn’t hear “HEY KIIBOOOOOOOY!~<3″ on the other end!

[punz4lyfe]

Professor Cerise SUCKS

TLDR: Cerise’s design is so lame, he’s hardly involved, he just seems so incredibly lazy, and he’s just plain awful in his job.

Hello, all you people of planet earth. Today, I’m going to talk about a character from Pokemon Journeys: Professor Cerise. And why he sucks. So let’s just get this started.

Reason #1: Design

Firstly, let’s take a good look at Professor Cerise, and already I’m incredibly annoyed. Look down below and pay close attention to Cerise’s design, and then do the same to Oak’s design.

Do you see it? Can you see where I’m going to go? That’s right...

From too identical clothing to almost similar hair styles, Cerise’s general design is way too similar to Oak’s. Why? Does he have some kind of huge admiration for Professor Oak that he dresses up in a similar fashion in hopes of one day being as highly regarded as him? Why would you do this to us, anipoke?

Are they trying to do the whole Red-Blue motif that Journeys has been doing with Ash and Goh? Oak hardly appears, so I don’t see why they would do that, but even if they did, it would be mess. Because of his colors, Cerise would represent the blue of the motif, but Ash represents that as well, so it would make more sense to have Ash and Oak both represent the red motif since they’re both the veterans to Goh and Cerise respectively. Also, isn’t Ash supposed to be the anime version of the game verse’s Red. I’m already getting a headache from this, so let’s move on.

Anywayz, Cerise’s design just seems so unoriginal that it hurts. I’m not kidding when I say that his entire family have way more unique designs compared to him. They, especially Chloe, also have way better personalities than him because I literally get nothing from this nerd.

Reason #2: What are you doing with your life, man?

As of now in Journeys, Cerise’s main involvement in the anime can be summed up as this:

“Hey. You two idiots. Go to this place and capture me some sweet Pokemonz. And no, I can’t go with you because I’m too busy sitting on my lazy butt, staring a oversized computer screens. Run along now.”

It gets even worse when you consider the fact that Ash, Goh, and his own son are more involved in Chloe’s life and trainer progression than he is. But going back to his main contribution to the series, he is apparently focused on studying as many Pokemon as he can, which also contributes to Goh’s goal of catching every mon out there, including Legendaries. So Professor Cerise, you’re apparently okay with a young kid catching powerful Legendaries so you can study them yourself at your lab away from their natural habitats where they could be needed? In a grander scale, you’re literally not that different from the many villains Ash has fought in both the series and the movies. Yes, you don’t want to hurt them and they could probably go back to their needed locations like Suicune did, but the fact that you still want to see them up-close and personal for your own little research still does seem a little selfish. Why can’t you go to these specific locations yourself? You are able to afford three children plane tickets everyday. The day where you set your sights on the Creation Trio or the Island Deities will be the day the world will really be in trouble.

Reason #3: Horrible, HORRIBLE Professor

Professor Cerise is supposed to be this series’ main professor, I get it. Doesn’t help that he completely SUCKS at his job.

Remember all those Gengar episodes? Apparently, Cerise knew of Gengar’s creepy tricks that occurred at the lab’s would-be location, and he continued to make his mark there anyway. It’s one thing to love a challenge and it’s another to be completely inconsiderate. What if your assistants have a fear of spooky apparitions? What if Gengar ended up attacking a Pokemon completely defenseless against it? You’re supposed to be smart, dude. At least act like it!

And now going to Ash and Goh, WHY did you think it would be a good idea to hire two little boys in the first. We know that Ash is capable as the audience, but literally the only reason you hired them was because they got lucky and ended up on a Lugia’s sweaty backside. Literally could’ve happened to anyone if they were there at the right time. If Jessie, James, or a random hobo ended up encountering Lugia, would you hire them, too? If I was writing anipoke, I would have Oak or Delia bring up Ash’s Champion status and the blatant fact that he has already traveled through almost every region known to man, and that would’ve been good enough for Cerise to recruit him. Goh would be easy, too. Just have Chloe, his only friend before Ash, reference him as someone very interested in Pokemon since school. Otherwise, Cerise just looks completely stupid and lazy.

Returning to the lab, remember Episode 23 when a food shortage occurred due to Skwovet’s Big Chungus appetite and many disputes happened afterwards? If you think about it, it’s kinda Cerise’s fault, too. Dude, you will potentially have over 800 monsters at your lab. You should be ordering food trucks by the dozen every day to keep everyone fed and satisfied. Ash and Goh are only kids, so why should the ENTIRE shibang be in their hands? You can afford these kids plane tickets every day. Use your money more wisely, nerdo.

Additionally, with so many species compacted into a single space, there are BOUND to be disputes. Plus, you are well aware of Ash’s goal and how often he trains and uses Goh’s fodder mons as training dummies. Why the heck haven’t you installed any healing machinery yet? As Episode 60 has shown, whenever Ash or Goh’s mons get injured, they have to take down out the lab and to the Pokemon Center, which is quite the distance away. Now with this in mind, Cerise, why the heck did you decide to have your lab so far away from the Pokemon Center in the first place?! Even taking Ash out of the equation, Pokemon will inevitably fight due to spacial disputes, food, or just for the fun of it. Clearly, you haven’t thought your whole career through. The day Goh catches a Zangoose and Seviper will be the day the lab falls into fire.

Final Points

So overall, Professor Cerise sucks. His design is so lame, he’s hardly involved, he just seems so incredibly lazy, and he’s just plain awful in his job. Why couldn’t Sonia or Professor Magnolia be this series’ main professors? Even though we haven’t seen them since the Darkest Day Arc, they at least have WAY better personalities and designs than Cerise could ever hope to have.

[aion-rsa]

Summer Movie Preview: From Black Widow to The Suicide Squad and Beyond

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The summer movie season has returned. Finally. Once something we all just took for granted, like handshakes and indoor dining, a summertime season stuffed with pricy Hollywood blockbusters and cinematic escapism suddenly feels like a long lost friend. But, rest assured, the summer movie season is genuinely and truly here. It’s maybe a little later than normal, yet it’s still in time for Memorial Day in the States.

This is of course happy news since many of the big screen events of this year have been 12 months or more in the offing. A Quiet Place Part II was supposed to open two Marches ago, and In the Heights is opening almost an exact year to the day from its original release. They’re here now, as is an impressive assortment of new films. There are genre fans’ long lost superhero spectacles, with Black Widow and The Suicide Squad leading the pack (and Shang-Chi closing out the season unusually late in time for Labor Day weekend), and there are also horror movies like The Conjuring 3 and M. Night Shyamalan’s Old, aforementioned musicals, family adventures in Jungle Cruise, psychedelic Arthurian legends via The Green Knight, and a few legitimately original projects like Stillwater and Reminiscence. Imagine that!

So sit back, put your feet in the pool, or up by the grill pit, and toast with us the summer movie’s resurrection.

A Quiet Place Part II

May 28 (June 3 in the UK)

Fourteen months after its original release date, the first movie delayed by the pandemic is finally coming to theaters for Memorial Day weekend. And despite what some critics say (even our own), most of us would argue it’s worth the wait. As a movie about a family enduring after a global crisis that has left their lives in tatters, and marred by personal tragedy, A Quiet Place Part II hits differently in 2021 than it would have a year ago. And it’s undeniably optimistic view of humanity feels like a warm balm now.

But beyond the meta context, writer-director John Krasinski (flying solo as screenwriter this time) has engineered a series of intelligent and highly suspenseful set pieces which puts Millicent Simmonds’ Regan front and center. Also buoyed by subtle and affecting work by Emily Blunt and Cillian Murphy, here as a neighbor they knew a few years and a lifetime ago, this is one worth dipping your toe back into cinema for, especially if you liked the first movie.

Cruella

May 28

We’ll admit it, we had the same initial skepticism you’re probably feeling about a Cruella de Vil origin story set in punk rock’s 1970s London. But put your cynicism aside, Disney’s Cruella is a decadent blast and the rarest of things: a live-action Disney remake that both honors its source material and does something creative with it. Neither a soulless scene-by-scene remake of a better animated film, or a lazy Maleficent like re-imagining, Cruella more often than not rocks, thanks in large part to its lead performance by Emma Stone.

Also a producer on the picture, Stone takes on the role of Cruella de Vil like it’ll be on an awards reel and absolutely flaunts the character’s madness and devilish charm. She also finds an excellent sparring partner via Emma Thompson, young Cruella’s very own Miranda Priestly. Once these two start their verbal battle at the end of the first act, the movie is elevated into an electric period comedy (with plenty of heavy handed period music). It’s a pseudo-thriller for all ages, enjoying some very sharp elbows for a kids movie.

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It

June 4 (May 26 in the UK)

The latest big-screen adventure for real-life ghostbusters Ed and Lorraine Warren (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga) sees the two drawn into the unusual case of the first ever U.S. murder trial where the defendant claimed he was innocent because he was possessed by a demon. This is the eighth movie in The Conjuring expanded universe—director Michael Chaves has already made a foray into this supernatural world with The Curse of La Llorona—and as with all the main Conjuring films, the hook is that it’s (very loosely) based on a true case that the Warrens were involved with.

Peter Safran and James Wan are back on board as producers, although with this being the first time Wan isn’t directing one of the main Ed and Lorraine investigations, we’re a little cautious about this return to the haunted museum.

In the Heights

June 11 (June 18 in the UK)

Lin-Manuel Miranda’s first Tony award winning musical is getting the proper big screen treatment in In the Heights. A full-fledged movie musical—as opposed to a taped series of performances, a la Disney+’s Hamilton—In the Heights is like a sweet summer drink (or Piragua) and love letter to the Latino community of New York City’s Washington Heights neighborhood.

Read more

Movies

Best Movie Musicals of the 21st Century

By David Crow

Movies

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It and the Perils of Taking on a Real Life Murder

By Rosie Fletcher

Closer in spirit to the feel-good summertime joy of Grease than the narratively complex Hamilton, this is perfect multiplex escapism (which will also be on HBO Max if you’re so inclined). Directed by Crazy Rich Asians’ Jon M. Chu, In the Heights has a euphoric sense of movement and dance as it transfers Miranda’s hybrid blend of freestyle rap, salsa rhythm, and Caribbean musical cues to the actual city blocks the show was written about. On one of those corners lives Usnavi (Anthony Ramos), a bodega owner with big dreams. He’s about to have the summer of his life. You might too.

Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard

June 16 (June 21 in the UK)

You know Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard is a throwback when even its trailer brings back the “trailer voice.” But then the appeal of the 2017 B-action comedy, The Hitman’s Bodyguard, was its very throwback nature: a violent, raunchy R-rated buddy comedy that starred Samuel L. Jackson and Ryan Reynolds, who exchanged quips as much as bullets between some genuinely entertaining stunts.

Hopefully the sequel can also be as much lowbrow fun as it doubles down on the premise, with Reynolds’ Michael Bryce now guarding Samla Hayek’s Sonia, the wife of Jackson’s Darius. All three are on a road trip through Italy as they’re chased by Antonio Banderas in what is sure to be a series of bloody, explosive set pieces. Probably a few “motherf***ers” will be dropped too.

Luca

June 18

Pixar Studios’ hit rate is frankly incredible. With each new film seemingly comes a catchy song, an Oscar nomination, and a flood of tears from anyone with a heart—and there’s no reason to believe that its next offering will be any different. Luca is a coming-of-age tale set on the Italian Riviera about a pair of young lads who become best friends and have a terrific summer getting into adventures in the sun. The slight catch is that they’re both sea monsters.

Read more

Movies

How Luca Became the First Pixar Movie Made at Home

By Don Kaye

Movies

Pixar, Italian Style: Why Luca is Set in 1950s Italy

By Don Kaye

This is the feature directorial debut of Enrico Casarosa, who says the movie is a celebration of friendship with nods to the work of Federico Fellini and Hayao Miyazaki. The writers are Jesse Andrews and Mike Jones—Andrews is new to Pixar but has experience with coming-of-agers, having penned Me and Earl and the Dying Girl, while Jones co-wrote Soul. Jacob Tremblay and Jack Dylan Grazer voice the young boys (sea monsters)—13-year-old Luca and his older teenager friend Alberto—with Maya Rudolph as Luca’s sea monster mom. After a year of lockdown, this could be the summer movie we all need.

F9

June 25

You better start firing up the grill, because the Fast and Furious crew is finally ready to have another summer barbecue. And this time, it’s not only the folks whom Dom Toretto calls “mi familia” in attendance. The big new addition to F9 is 

John Cena as Jakob Toretto. As the long-lost little brother we didn’t know Vin Diesel’s Dom had, Jakob is revealed to be a superspy, assassin, and performance driver working for Dom’s arch-nemesis, Cypher (Charlize Theron). Everything the Family does together, Jakob does alone, as a one-man wrecking crew, and he’s coming in hot.

Fans will probably be happier, though, to see Sung Kang back as Han Seoul-Oh, the wheelman who was murdered in Fast & Furious 6, and then pretty much forgotten in The Fate of the Furious when his killer got invited to the cookout. It’s an injustice that brought veteran series director Justin Lin back to  the franchise to resurrect the dead. So it’s safe to assume he won’t be asking Cypher to bring the potato salad.

The Forever Purge

July 2 (July 16 in the UK)

We know what you’re thinking: Didn’t The Purge: Election Year end the Purge forever? That or “are they really still making these?” The answer to both questions is yes. Nevertheless, here we are with The Forever Purge, a movie which asks what happens if Purgers just, you know, committed extravagant holiday crime on the other 364 days of the year? You get what is hopefully the grand finale of this increasingly tired concept.

The Tomorrow War

July 2

Hear me out: What if it’s like The Terminator but in reverse? That had to be the pitch for this one, right? In The Tomorrow War, instead of evil cyborgs time traveling to the past to kill our future savior, soldiers from the future time travel to the past to enlist our current best warrior and take him to a world on the brink 30 years from now.

It’s a crazy premise, and the kind of high-concept popcorn that one imagines Chris Pratt excels at. Hence Pratt’s casting as Dan, one of the best soldiers of the early 21st century who’ll go into the future to stop an alien invasion. The supporting cast, which includes Oscar winner J.K. Simmons and Yvonne Strahovski, Betty Gilpin, and Sam Richardson, is also nothing to sneeze at.

Black Widow

July 9

The idea of making a Black Widow movie has been around since long before the Marvel Cinematic Universe first lifted into the sky on Tony Stark’s repulsors. The character has been onscreen for more than a decade now, and Marvel Studios has for too long danced around making a solo Widow, at least in part due to the machinations of Marvel Entertainment chairman Ike Perlmutter.

Read more

Movies

How Black Widow Could Build The MCU’s Future

By Kayti Burt

Movies

Upcoming Marvel Movies Release Dates: MCU Phase 4 Schedule, Cast, and Story Details

By Mike Cecchini and 1 other

But the standalone Black Widow adventure is here at last, and it now serves as a sort-of coda to the story of Natasha Romanoff, since we already know her tragic fate in Avengers: Endgame. Directed by Cate Shortland (Berlin Syndrome, Lore), the movie will spell out how Natasha (Scarlett Johansson) kept herself busy between the events of Captain America: Civil War and Avengers: Infinity War, primarily with a trip home to Russia to clear some of that red from her ledger.

There, she will reunite with figures from her dark past, including fellow Red Room alumnus Yelena Belova (Florence Pugh), Russian would-be superhero Alexei Shostakov, aka the Red Guardian (David Harbour), and Melina Vostokoff (Rachel Weisz), another survivor of the Black Widow program and a maternal figure to Natasha and Yelena.

It’s a chance to say goodbye to Nat and see Johansson as the beloved Avengers one more time. But this being Marvel, we suspect that the studio has a few tricks up its sleeve and in this movie about the future of Phase 4.

Space Jam: A New Legacy

July 16

In the annals of synergistic branding, Space Jam: A New Legacy might be one for the record books. A sequel to an older millennials’ 1990s touchstones—the thoroughly mediocre Michael Jordan meets Bugs Bunny movie, Space Jam—this sequel sees LeBron James now trapped in Looney Tunes world… but wait, there’s more! Instead of only charmingly interacting with WB’s classic stable of cartoon characters, King James will also be in the larger “WB universe” where the studio will resurrect from the dead every property they own the copyright to, from MGM’s classic 1939 The Wizard of Oz to, uh, the murderous rapists in A Clockwork Orange.

… yay for easter eggs?

Old

July 23

Though he might be accused of being a little bit hit-and-miss in the past, the release of a new M. Night Shyamalan movie should always be cause for celebration. Especially one with such a deeply creepy premise. Based on the graphic novel Sandcastle by Pierre Oscar Levy and Frederik Peeters, Old sees a family on vacation discover that the beach they are on causes them to age extremely rapidly and live out their entire lives in a day.

This is surely perfect fodder for Shyamalan, who does high-concept horror like no one else. The cast is absolute quality, featuring Gael García Bernal, Hereditary’s Alex Wolff, Jo Jo Rabbit’s Thomasin McKenzie, Phantom Thread’s Vicky Krieps, Little Women’s Eliza Scanlen, and many more. The trailer is pleasingly disturbing too as children become teenagers, a young woman is suddenly full-term pregnant, and adults seem to be decaying in front of their own eyes. Harrowing in the best possible way.

Snake Eyes

July 23 (August 20 in the UK)

Snake Eyes will finally bring us the origin story of the G.I. Joe franchise’s most iconic and beloved member. Henry Golding (Crazy Rich Asians) stars in the title role, with Warrior’s Andrew Koji as his nemesis—conflicted baddie (and similar fan fave) Storm Shadow. Expect a tale heavy on martial arts badassery, especially with The Raid’s Iko Uwais on board as the pair’s ninja master. Samara Weaving will play G.I. Joe staple Scarlett after her breakout a few years ago in Ready or Not, while Úrsula Corberó has been cast as Cobra’s Baroness. Robert Schwentke (The Time Traveler’s Wife, Red) directs.

Jungle Cruise

July 30

Jungle Cruise director Jaume Collet-Serra is best known for making slightly dodgy actioners starring Liam Neeson (Unknown, Non-Stop, Run All Night) and half-decent horror movies (Orphan, The Shallows), so exactly which direction this family adventure based on a theme park ride will take remains to be seen.

Borrowing a page and premise from Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn in The African Queen (1951), Jungle Cruise stars the ever-charismatic Dwayne Johnson as a riverboat captain taking Emily Blunt’s scientist and her brother (Jack Whitehall) to visit the fabled Tree of Life in the early 20th century. Like the ride, the gang will have to watch out for wild animals along the way.

Unlike the ride, they’re competing with a German expedition team who are heading for the same goal. A solid supporting cast (Jesse Plemons, Édgar Ramírez, Paul Giamatti, Andy Nyman) and a script with rewrites by Michael Green (Logan, Blade Runner 2049) might mean Disney has another hit on its hands. Either way, a lovely boat trip with The Rock should be diverting at worst.

The Green Knight

July 30 (August 6 in the UK)

There have been several major Hollywood reimaginings of Arthurian legends in the 21st century. And every one of them has been thoroughly rotten for one reason or another. Luckily, David Lowery’s The Green Knight looks poised to break the trend with a trippy, but twistedly faithful, interpretation of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight.

Dev Patel stars as Sir Gawain, a chivalrous knight in King Arthur’s court who takes up the challenge of the mysterious Green Knight (The Witch’s Ralph Ineson under mountains of makeup): He’ll swing a blow and risk receiving a returning strike in a year’s time. Gawain attempts to cheat the devil by cutting his head clean off, yet when the Green Knight lifts his severed head from Camelot’s floors, things start to get weird. As clearly one of A24’s biggest visual fever dreams to date, this is one we’re highly anticipating.

Stillwater

July 30 (August 6 in the UK)

The Oscar winning-writer director behind Spotlight, Tom McCarthy, returns to the big screen with a fictional story that feels awfully similar to real world events. In this film, Matt Damon plays Bill, a proud father who saw his daughter Allison (Abigail Breslin) go abroad to study in France. After she’s accused of murdering her roommate by local authorities, the deeply Southern and deeply Oklahoman father must travel to a foreign land to try and prove his daughter’s innocence.

It obviously has some parallels with the Amanda Knox story but it also looks like a potentially hard hitting original drama with a talented cast. Fingers crossed.

The Suicide Squad

August 6 (July 30 in the UK)

You might have seen a Suicide Squad movie in the past, but you’ve never seen James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad. With a liberating R-rating and an old school vision from the Guardians of the Galaxy director—who likens this to 1960s war capers, such as The Dirty Dozen or Where Eagles Dare—this Suicide Squad is absolutely stacked with talented actors wallowing in DC weirdness. One of the key players in this is Polka-Dot Man, another is a walking, talking Great White Shark, voiced by Sylvester Stallone. The villain is a Godzilla-sized starfish from space!

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So like it’s namesake, there’s probably a lot of characters who aren’t going to pull through this one. Even so, we can rest easy knowing that Margot Robbie’s Harley Quinn will be as winsome than ever, and the likes of Idris Elba and John Cena will add some dynamic gravitas to the eccentric DC Extended Universe.

Free Guy

August 13

Perhaps pitched as The Truman Show for the video game age, Free Guy stars Ryan Reynolds as an easygoing, happy-go-lucky “Guy” who discovers… he’s a video game NPC living inside the equivalent of a Grand Theft Auto video game. This might explain why the bank he works at keeps getting robbed all the time. But as a virtual sprite who’s developed sentiency, he just might be able to win over enough gamers to not shoot him, and make love not war.

It’s an amusing premise, and hopefully director Shawn Levy can bring to it the same level of charm he achieved with the very first Night at the Museum movie.

Respect

August 13 (September 10 in the UK)

Before her passing in 2018, Aretha Franklin gave her blessing to Jennifer Hudson to play the Queen of Soul. Now that musical biopic is here with Hudson hitting the same high notes of the legend who sang such standards as “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman,” “Think,” “I Say a Little Prayer,” and of course “Respect.”

The film comes with a lot of expectation and a lot of pedigree, with Forest Whitaker and Audra McDonald in the cast. Most of all though, it comes with that rich musical library, which will surely take center stage. And if movies like Bohemian Rhapsody and Rocketman have taught us anything, it’s that moviegoers love when you play the hits.

Reminiscence

August 20 (August 18 in the UK)

Lisa Joy is one of the most exciting voices on television today. One-half of the creative team behind Westworld, Joy steps into her own with her directorial debut (and as the solo writer) in Reminiscence, a science fiction film with a reliably knotty premise.

Hugh Jackman plays Nick Bannister, a man who lives in a dystopian future where the oceans have risen and the cities are crumbling. In a declining Miami, he sells a risky new technology that allows you to relive your past (and possibly change it, at least fancifully?). But when he discovers the lost love of his life (Rebecca Ferguson) is cropping up in other peoples’ memories, which seem to implicate her in a murder, well… things are bound to start getting weird. We don’t know a whole lot more, but we cannot wait to find out more.

Candyman

August 27

Announced back in 2018, this spiritual sequel to Bernard Rose’s 1992 original is one of the most exciting and anticipated movies on the calendar. Produced by Jordan Peele and directed by Nia DaCosta, the film takes place in the present day and about a decade after Chicago’s Cabrini-Green housing projects have been torn down. Watchmen’s Yahya Abdul-Mateen II plays an up-and-coming visual artist who moves to the now-gentrified area with his partner and is inspired by the legend of Candyman, an apparition with a hook for a hand, to create new work about the subject. But in doing so, he risks unleashing a dark history and a new wave of violence.

Tony Todd, the star of the original movie, will also reprise his role in a reboot that aims to inspire fear for only the right reasons.

The Beatles: Get Back

August 27

Director Peter Jackson thinks folks have a poisoned idea about the Beatles in their final days. Often portrayed as divided and antagonistic toward one another during the recordings of their last albums, particularly Let It Be (which was their penultimate studio recording and final release), Jackson insists this misconception is influenced by Michael Lindsay-Hogg’s 1970 documentary named after the album.

So, after going through the reams of footage Lindsay-Hogg shot but didn’t use, Jackson has crafted this new documentary about the album’s recording which is intended to paint a fuller (and more feel-good) portrait of the band which changed the world. Plus, the music’s going to be great… 

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

September 3

The greatest fighter in Marvel history finally hits the big screen with Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings. Simu Liu (Kim’s Convenience) takes on the title role of a character destined for a bright future in the MCU. Marvel fans might note that the “Ten Rings” of the title is the same organization that first appeared all the way back in Iron Man, and Tony Leung will finally bring their villainous leader, The Mandarin, to life. Awkwafina of The Farewell and Crazy Rich Asians fame also stars. Directed by Destin Daniel Cretton (Short Term 12), this should deliver martial arts action unlike anything we’ve seen so far in the MCU.

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[andromedarune]

Bede x Hop Request:“Just Desserts” (p2)

REQUEST ~ “I have one, it’s a hop x bede where bede feels bad for being mean to hop, but is too scared of apologizing to him in fear of rejection. Due to his past at the orphanage and his overall fear of being left alone again. So he decides to send homemade desserts to hop with secret messages ,anonymously . Hop Figures it out when the desserts stop coming after bede gets sick badly ( maybe a bad fever from exhaustion, anything that stops him from baking will do). You can include opal or the other gym leaders teasing hop on who could be sending the treats. I hope this is okay.”

A/N: Alright, here’s the conclusion to my mini-fic requested to me earlier in the week! I definitely got carried away with the prompt, but I really wanted to nail the emotions being presented here (because there are A LOT). Not sure if I accomplished that, or much else, tbh... Oh well! Give it a read anyway and hopefully it’s decent? Thank you!

It’s hard to really say that his work could possibly follow a routine. There were the basic things that always remained the same, of course; he’d wake up a seven in the morning every day, feed Dubwool before he started eating his bedsheets, do whatever morning chores his mother had waiting for him, head to the lab, basically become free slave labor for Sonia for the next eight or so hours, come home to a few more chores, then pass out on the couch while working on some papers before magically waking up the next morning in his bedroom. That was probably the closest thing to a routine he’s ever had, all things considered. But Hop never really minded the idea of a routine or the lack thereof; so long as he got to have some fun at some point, he didn’t mind. And it was safe to say that being the new professor’s assistant was far from what he would consider a boring life.

But he wasn’t sure how he felt about getting comfortable with someone constantly leaving lovely gifts for him every single week.

The first one came in, leaving the assistant incredibly puzzled. It wasn’t anybody’s birthday, here, so that idea was dashed. Maybe Leon brought it for Sonia? Hop shook his head; he wasn’t so quick to assume something like that, especially since Leon had never mentioned anything about giving Sonia presents beforehand. Nevertheless, the youth brought his findings to his boss, who was equally as perplexed as him. So the two opened up the box as well as the letter. A beautiful cake, and an eloquent letter apparently dedicated to Hop. Now that was a plot-twist.

“Someone’s got a secret admirer~,” Sonia nudged his shoulder, still giggling at the way he was completely frozen in a state of perpetual embarrassment. Maybe he should have investigated on his own before bringing it to Sonia.

“D-definitely not!” Hop finally found his words, wincing at his voice crack. He thought he had enough of that when his voice started changing. Apparently it wasn’t done with him.

“Oh yeah? What did that letter say? Something about the ‘brilliant radiance of determination reflecting like the sun in your eyes’?”

“Sonia, please,” Hop slapped his hands over his face.

She laughed some more, giving him a good pat on the back.

“Relax - there’s nothing wrong with having a secret admirer. It’s actually really sweet and adorable.” She picked up the letter, flipping it around a few times in her hands. “Though, they didn’t seem to leave a name. Any ideas on who it might be?”

“No clue. I honestly didn’t think that anybody’d actually think of me like that…”

“What? Of course they do! You’re a total catch, Hop - not for me though, ‘cause that’s gross.”

“Yeah, gross,” Hop finally laughed, lowering his hands to inspect the cake a bit. It really did look good. Chocolate cake was always delicious. “So, should we eat this now or…?”

“Who, me? No way - this is your secret admirer. You eat it.”

Before Hop could argue, Sonia sashayed out of the room, snatching up some of the documents she had brought into the room. Once she was gone, the boy simply sighed, glancing back down at the cake. Well, best not let it go to waste. He sat himself down, skimming over the letter a few more times. Who in the world could it be?

A week went by, and he had forgotten about the letter and cake. But they, apparently, did now forget about him.

“Another?” he blushed down at the box on the ground. He didn’t even need to look inside to know what it was. Hop looked around, hoping to find a sign of somebody around the entrance to the lab. Nothing but Rookidees. He sighed, kneeling down to pick up the gift. I don’t even know if Lee gets stuff like this, he thought to himself, pulling the simple envelope up to investigate. Maybe they left a clue this time…

But, just like before, there was no discernable way to figure out the identity of the mysterious benefactor. He opted to hide from Sonia’s teasing, hiding himself up in one of the numerous study rooms that the main laboratory had to offer. The letter was similar to before; beautifully crafted words of admiration, noting the many qualities of the assistant that he hardly noticed himself. He could note, though, a strange familiarity in the writing. ‘I had never known shame until I saw myself in your teary eyes.’ So obviously they knew each other - unless this was all metaphorical. Hop was never good at metaphorical writing. But Hop didn’t exactly interact with a lot of people, these days. He’d occasionally get to hang out with Gloria if she had time off; maybe it was her? He shook his head at that. The girl wouldn’t know bashful if it hit her in the face. A shy confession like this definitely wasn’t her style. Maybe Marnie. He hoped not. They never really spoke to each other, even during the gym challenge, but that was mainly because Hop wasn’t sure if he was more scared of her or her brother. But fancy homemade cakes didn’t really fit her style, either, so that was out. Who else did he know?

Not really anybody else. He sighed, skimming through the letter a few times more before resigning to just eat the cake and return to work. It was, unfortunately, amazingly delicious. Better than even the fancy cakes up in Wyndon. Whoever this person was, they really knew how to bake; Hop just wished he could finally figure it out so he could thank them or something. Do you even thank secret admirers? How does all this stuff work out? Definitely too much for him to figure out.

Four weeks later, and it became an unfortunate addition to his routine. Friday would roll around, and Hop would eagerly rush through his work without even noticing. Sometimes Sonia would comment, other times, she’d just wink and saunter off. Hop tried not to think about it too much - anticipation really did get annoying, even for him - so he sought to busy his mind with work until the time came upon him.

The clock ticked on, and so did the day. Before he knew it, the sun was setting, the whistle of the tea kettle from the kitchen signalling the end of his shift. Sonia called him over to join her for some tea, usually her way of saying thanks for all his hard work. He had barely walked into the room when Sonia leaned onto the kitchen table, curious eyes searching for some juicy gossip from his own golden irises.

“So, I noticed that we didn’t get any… special deliveries today.”

Hop blinked.

“Huh, so that’s what felt off today,” he tried to say, hoping that he could save face just a little bit.

“So? Does that mean that you’ve figured out who they are?”

The teenage boy grimaced, running a hand across the nape of his neck. It was a little sore today; maybe he slept wrong?

“Uh, well, uh… not really.”

“Huh?” Sonia slapped the table. Oh no, it’s happening - she’s getting worked up over something that doesn’t involve her again. “You’re serious?! Your secret lover didn’t send you a gift today and you don’t know why?!”

“W-well, th-they’re, uh, not really, um - we’re not -”

“Hop this is serious!” she lunged for him, grabbing his shoulders. “This person has faithfully been leaving you sweet gifts every Friday for over a month, now, and just magically stops doing it out of nowhere?!”

“Maybe… they forgot?”

“TRUE LOVE DOESN’T FORGET, HOP!”

This lady really needs to lay off the chick-flicks. But Hop had learned the hard way never to point out stuff like that when Sonia was in one of her manic moods.

“S-sure it doesn’t…” he tried not to sound creeped out.

Sonia sighed, putting her hands on her hips as she sent him a sassy pout.

“I’ve seen this in a show once - the person with unrequited feelings reaches out in their own way to their crush, but then something bad happens to them, so the crush has to be the one to help them.”

“I don’t think that’s what happens in real life -” Sonia shot him another look and he promptly shut up.

“Yes, of course!” she smiled, ignoring Hop’s previous comment entirely. “You have to find out who your secret admirer is quickly or else something terrible might happen to them - if it already hasn’t! Maybe they’ve been hit by a car! Or were kidnapped! Or are terminally ill and only your love can save them!”

“How are you a nationally-acclaimed pokemon professor?” he muttered under his breath.

“It’s settled then - here’s your mission, Assistant Hop! Figure out who can bake a cake like that, and you’ll find your true love! Easy, right?”

Hop nodded, not really understanding what she was saying, but was desperate enough to just lie to escape her nonsense. She was probably just overexaggerating like always, but he also didn’t want this mysterious person to be hurt. Maybe something did happen to interrupt the once steady flow of kind words and delicious foods? And thus began his search.

As terrible as it felt, the first person Hop went to was Leon. His big brother no doubt had handled situations like this before, so Hop swallowed his pride and approached his brother on the subject. Once he finally got Leon to stop laughing, he explained the whole situation from start to finish.

“Well,” Leon stroked his chin, at least pretending to seem semi-serious, “I don’t think I personally know any high-caliber bakers. But if I’m remembering things correctly, I think Opal is said to have legendary baking skills that practically nobody can compare to.”

Hop grimaced, but Leon quickly waved his hands before his brother full-on threw up everywhere at the thought of Opal being his secret admirer.

“No, no, no! I’m not saying she’s the one sending them - I’m just wondering if she taught the person who’s sending them.”

Hop leaned back a bit, trying to think. He didn’t really know too much about Ms. Opal (other than that she was an eccentric rich lady at an unknown age who seems to enjoy dressing people in bright shades of pink). But if there was a chance that she knew the identity of his mysterious benefactor, then he was willing to investigate a bit further. He opened his mouth to thank his brother, but a dark scowl suddenly flashed over his features. Leon blinked.

“Uh… everything alright there?”

“I just remembered,” Hop growled, “that if I want to even get close to Opal, then I’ll have to see that jerk again.”

“Who, Bede? Like I’ve said a thousand times, don’t worry too much about him. I hear he’s really mellowed out these days. Maybe all that pink finally seeped into his brain.”

Hop scoffed, but otherwise kept all his venomous comments at bay. He thanked his brother for the help and hurried out the door, making his way towards Ballonlea.

Ballonlea was always a difficult place to get to. A big contributor to that issue was due to Glimtangle Forest, which was basically a mystical maze that had posed as a major threat to countless gym challengers as well as general travellers for years. This is why most people opt for a flying taxi whenever they need to get to the city, but even then, some mystical fairy nonsense occasionally will cause a detour for whatever poor soul happened to be flying over the forest. Thankfully for Hop, this wasn’t the case, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t nervously twiddling his thumbs at the apprehension of having to navigate that nonsensical forest when in such a hurry.

He jumped out of the taxi, offering a berry to the Corviknight before making his normal dash for one of the most ornate buildings in the quaint town. It wasn’t hard to find Ms. Opal’s house when it was so amazingly decorated - it was borderline gaudy with the amount of pinks and purples passionately strewn about the house’s complex design. He wasted no time, bounding up the fancy front steps, grabbing the old-fashioned door knocker, and knocked. A few breaths passed him by as he shoved his sweaty hands into his pockets. What was he even nervous for?

After a couple of moments, the door opened, revealing the ever intimidating Ms. Opal, the now retired fairy-type gym leader of Ballonlea.

“Well, if this isn’t a… pleasant surprise,” she smirked, seeming almost deviously pleased in the teen’s awkwardness. “Running errands for the professor today, hm?”

“A-actually, I, um….” Hop took a deep breath and gathered his resolve. “I’m actually here to ask you something.”

She nodded, tapping the ground a couple times with her cane.

“Of course you are. Come inside, then.”

Before the assistant could protest, the elderly woman was already shuffling away deeper into the depths of the house. Hop could only sigh as he followed behind her. It was painfully frustrating; she took tiny steps and dragged her feet along the somehow pristine wooden floors, so Hop had to take the world’s slowest pace at the constant protest of his long legs. But over the course of a year, he’d managed to attain some semblance of calm, deciding that it would be best if he didn’t complain too much around the person he was seeking assistance from. Once he got the information he wanted, he could run around to his little heart’s content.

Eventually, Ms. Opal halted just before a beautiful white staircase, spiraling all the way up into the rather tall ceiling above.

“So, tell me,” she mused through sharp, invasive eyes, “what was it you were hoping to ask of me?”

“I… was curious to know if, um… Well, uh… if you happened to have any knowledge in baking. L-like, y’know, a cake, or something…”

Opal’s eyebrows twitched upwards just a centimeter. She brought a hand to her chin in dramatic thought.

“In my earlier days, I was quite proficient at it. But I don’t bake nearly as much as I used to.”

“Then… is there, um, a chance that you might have taught someone how to bake like you?”

She paused, staring intently at the boy with an amused expression. Hop was beginning to wonder if he really wanted the answer to this question. Before he could make up his mind to flee, she let out a small chuckle.

“Ah, but of course. My protege has been trained in everything I know how to teach. Head up these stairs and you’ll find your secret admirer.”

A stone of dread sank into the depths of his gut. Maybe Ms. Opal had more apprentices? It definitely couldn’t be the person he was thinking it was, right? No, that would be silly - impossible, even. But there seemed to be no turning back now. Hop swallowed his fears and slowly began his way up the stairs, trying to ignore the apprehensions racing through his fingertips.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Bede rolled onto his other side, desperate to find a position that made existence a little less agonizing. A dreadful fever had overtaken his body, unrelenting in its rage for the past four days, leaving the normally active youth bedridden the entire time. Hatterene was on nursing duty, constantly checking her trainer’s temperature and switching out his face towel in an attempt to ease the fever. Sylveon was stubbornly nestled under the covers, desperate to get as close to his body as physically possible. Not like Bede could really scold it even if he wanted to; he didn’t want to waste his energy on pointless yelling. So, he reluctantly stayed in bed, allowing his devoted pokemon to care for him while he waited for his body to recover. But a knock on the door earned a frustrated grown from him.

“What?” he hissed, trying to speak through a throat chalked full of phlegm. Hatterene nudged his shoulder, reminding him to watch his emotions. She was a sensitive thing, that Hatterene. Bede sat up, watching the door open and fully expecting to get an earful from that old woman again. So it’s safe to say that his heart entirely stopped when he saw Hop sheepishly shuffle in, wringing his hands nervously before his chest.

This… this couldn’t really be happening, right? No - he must be dreaming. Yes, that’s it. This was just a fever-induced nightmare. Bede would wake up in a moment’s notice and be in his bed once more, alone with only the company of his pokemon to rely on, just like always. Just like always. Just like always.

“Um…” Hop kept his eyes on the ground, brows knitted tightly together. Bede wasn’t sure if the boy was frustrated, sad, or confused. It all just looked like a blur of emotions constantly shifting across the assistant’s tan face. “... It’s… been a while.”

Bede opened his mouth with full intent to say words, but none dared to come to fruition. So he closed his mouth, pushing his aching body up to his elbows. How pathetic he felt right now, sick in bed with this person who confused him so annoying bad being unable to look at him. Maybe it would be best if Hop just left. At least then Bede would be familiar with the feelings in his chest. He didn’t know what he was feeling right now.

“So…” Hop cleared his throat, attempting to meet Bede’s eyes, but quickly looked off to the side. “I… I just wanted to ask if… if you’re… um…”

The light-haired boy felt a bead of sweat tumble down his brow. Surely it was from the heat of the fever, right? No way was he this nervous. No, no, Bede always kept his cool. Especially when beign confronted by the person he sort of kinda maybe almost possibly liked. Not that he did, anyway. Because that would be stupid. And Bede definitely wasn’t stupid. Right?

Hop sucked in a sharp breath of air, balling his hands into fists as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“Are you the person who’s been sending me those gifts?” he threw the words out, trying to ignore his own flurry of conflicting emotions going through him at the moment. He didn’t know how to feel about either possible answer. Could he be happy with either one?

The intensity in the air rose a few degrees, making every breath laborious. Bede glanced towards Hatterene for some sort of support - he didn’t really know why he did. She smiled back at him, cooing a few unintelligible sounds.

Well, by the gym leader’s logic, if Hop was destined to abandon him like everybody else, then it really didn’t matter if he knew the truth, then, right? It didn’t matter of Hop found out this terribly dreadful secret Bede’s been carrying with him for over a year. According to the assistant, Bede was still Bede. Cold. Egotistical. Conniving. After everything that had happened, it was ridiculous to hope that Hop could ever forgive Bede, and nobody could blame him. And even if he could, it wouldn’t last. No, Bede would surely find some way to screw things up, or wouldn’t be enough to make Hop happy in any condition. Hop would leave, and eventually Ms. Opal will leave, just like the chairman and his foster parents and his parents that never came back and

“So what if I am?” the words hissed past his lips, far more venomous than he meant. Oh well. It didn’t matter. The outcome would be the same, anyways.

Hop flinched back a bit at the sharpness of the other boy’s words, but his conflicted expression remained stable. Once he collected himself, he took another deep breath. Slower, this time, as if to savor the taste of oxygen flowing through his lungs.

“Why?”

A painfully simple question. Remarkably, it was also one Bede hadn’t really expected. He really should have thought this through.

Why did he bake those cakes? Why did he write those letters? Why did he send them to Hop? Why did he feel this way? Why, why, why?

It eventually became obvious that Hop wasn’t going to hear a response. Bede had opted to glaring holes into his duvet, fingers tangling themselves within the fluffy pink fabric. Ah, pink, the color of so many things: sweetness, innocent attraction, adoration, and - evidently - embarrassment. There was no way to hide such a shade from the plush of his cheeks. How bothersome.

“... Did you really mean what you said in those letters?”

Bede looked back over at Hop for the briefest of moments, and immediately wished that he hadn’t. Much confliction remained, but there was something else there, now, amid the tempest of clashing feelings depicted on the teen’s face. Perhaps Bede really was having a fever dream. No way there was actually a bit of hopefulness in Hop’s eyes.

Maybe that’s what pulled out a strange sentence from Bede’s mouth.

“Every word.”

Hop shied his gaze away, seeming a bit more bashful as he rubbed the nape of his neck. Now Bede was really confident that he was the color of embarrassment. Maybe a bit too red though. The assistant stuttered an awkward laugh, trying to ease the thickness of the air while Bede shifted a bit more upright. Sylveon didn’t appreciate that motion, evidently, and crawled onto it’s trainer’s lap. Instinctively, Bede ran his fingers through the creature’s fur, desperate to distract himself from his non-fever related warmth. He looked back over to Hop, who seemed to still be processing the gravity of those words, and another sentence slipped out without Bede’s permission.

“Are you going to leave?”

Hop met his gaze, surprised.

“What?”

Bede took a small breath, losing just the smallest smidge of confidence in his words as he took the initiative to repeat them.

“... I said, are you going to leave?”

“Do you want me to?”

Here it was. The moment he had been unknowingly dreading. If he says yes, then Hop will no doubt walk away forever, and Bede would be back in his element of loneliness. Or, he says no, and takes a risk he never expected to take willingly. He would be clueless, a Magicarp out of water, left with nothing to keep himself steady but the hope that Hop would guide him through the confusion. Could he really take that chance?

“... No.”

Bede couldn’t keep his eyes on Hop. This was it, the deepest layer of his person; everything he was had been revealed in only a handful of words, leaving nothing but a fearful child afraid of being left behind by the people he loved. And now Hop could see the truth behind Bede’s every action and every word. This was blind faith in its simplest form, the gym leader unsure of what exactly he was hoping for.

“Okay.”

His eyes shot back up, genuine surprise (and a tinge of fear) written all over his flustered face. Hop stared back at him, hands shoved deep in his pockets with a curious expression on his face. What could that guy be thinking when he stared at Bede so intently?

“O-okay? Okay… what?” Bede’s voice died down syllable by syllable, reduced to nothing but a faint whisper by the end of it. Hop gave a timid smile. Perhaps a bit afraid, but a little hopeful, still. Such a strange expression on such a tender face.

“I’ll stay.”

[pokemonswshbutionlyplayedsword]

Beach day!!! What do all the leaders do at the beach? Along with Hop, Marnie, Bede and Sonia because they gotta hang.

They’re all in Hulbury for the beach day. It’s the nicest place.

Milo definitely basks in the sun. His pokemon are photosynthesizing, but Milo’s just enjoying the warmth. He will go play in the ocean for a bit, too, though.

Nessa is definitely in the water, as per usual. She hardly even touches the sand. She stays close to Allister and teaches him how to swim a little, as well as making sure everyone’s safe.

Kabu is suntanning. He enjoys the warmth and so do his pokemon. Since his pokemon refuse to go into the water, so does he. He has no problem just watching, though.

Bea is in the water, staying close to Allister. She wants to do physical activity, not just lay in the sand and do nothing. She’s definitely very active and is trying to keep up with Nessa as a challenge to herself.

Allister is just enjoying the water. It’s fun, even though he can’t really swim that well. It’s okay, though, cause Nessa and Bea are there to help him. He also spends some time under an umbrella making a sand castle with Gordie.

Opal is enjoying a book in a nice lounge chair under an umbrella. She’s happy to watch everyone else playing and having fun. She’ll definitely send someone to go get her an ice cream or something, cause she’s super comfortable and she’s not going to get up.

Gordie is making a sand castle. He wants to make a huge palace because hell yeah. Every once in a while, Allister comes by to help. It’s looking great. He’s building it close to Piers and teasing him. Piers might come by and kick it into his eyes later. Haha.

Melony prefers the cold, so the beach is not her style. She just kind of lounges on a towel under an umbrella. She definitely needs an ice cream or something else that’s cold. She’s also making sure everyone has sunblock. Yes, everyone. Sun damage is no joke.

Piers is hiding from the sun on a towel under a wide umbrella. He’s got sunglasses and a wide brimmed hat in case he has to leave the safety of his umbrella. It does not take long at all for Piers to get a sunburn. Also, his hair is in a braid because it’s so hot. He’s being pestered by Gordie, but at least he gets ice cream for Piers. Piers is trying to work on a new song, but everyone is interrupting him. Gordie and Piers dug a hole that his umbrella is covering.

Raihan’s taking a lot of pictures of himself. On the beach, in the sand, with the others, in the water. All of his followers love it. He keeps trying to get a picture with Piers, but basically Piers is hiding from the sun and everyone else. Raihan tried to get in, but he got sand in the eyes. Just let Piers write.

Leon is sprawled out on the sand enjoying a moment of peace. He’s not being swarmed, nor is he expected to do anything. He might get up and play in the water. He might get an ice cream. He might hide in Piers’ beach bunker. It’s so nice that he’s being given options.

Hop is playing in the water and helping Gordie with his sand castle. He’s also living for the ice cream and other frozen sweets that are being sold nearby. Of course, he’s always sent to get something for someone else when he gets up to get something. It doesn’t bother him, though.

Marnie is also playing in the water, but she’s also bothering Piers because it’s fun. She took one of Gordie’s sand buckets and is dumping water into Piers’ bunker. He’s blacklisted Marnie, and now she gets sand thrown at her when she tries to get in unless she brings a treat for Piers. Please, Arceus, just let the man write.

Bede is sticking close to Opal, well, he tried to. But Marnie and Hop dragged him away to play in the water and make a sand castle to outshine Gordie. He’s the one Opal usually calls to bring her a drink or a treat. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s having fun.

Sonia stays mostly with Nessa. She goes to the beach with her a lot, so it’s pretty normal. She also hangs by Leon and brings him a drink sometimes. She knows he’s stressed and relaxing, so she’s just trying to leave him be. She does want him to stay hydrated and prevent him from feeling left out.

Beach days are fun. Oh yeah, and their pokemon are all just kind of hanging around them, too, playing and whatnot. They’re kind of off in their own groups playing in the water or basking in the sun.

[badlydrawnmanic]

time for episode 5 because i’m bored as heck

• just thoughts during the theme song but i wish we got to see more of aleena • the extras in this opening scene look passable for mobians which is a surprise • sleet explains something to dingo while looking directly into the camera

• WHAT IS THIS CATERPILLAR DOG THING UGH • it’s a legal requirement for thief children to have wack hair • kjsdgsd max snapped • i think i remember some people shipping manic with this kid • what animal are any of these characters supposed to be • that bungee jump thing makes no sense at all which is terrible • who gave sonic a drivers liscence • sonic your whole thing is to help people and then some poor kid comes in your van like “help me” and you’re like “why should i” what is the truth • shit dude that van turns on a dime • nobody in this show knows how to drive do they • this little goblin dude juggling is kinda cute, his design ain’t bad. weird colors but that’s a given • what sleet turns dingo into reminds me of the koopalings right down to the voice • is manic older than max or does he just say “little bro” because max looks even shorter than manic does • manic: stealing’s wrong   max:

• max brings up a good point about like... how are they gonna survive without money from the shit they stole • i think i redesigned max at one point? i think i made him a xoloitzcuintli (those weird mexican hairless dogs)

• OH I DID, this was back when i mainly did lineless art (it was easier doing art like this rather than lined art with a mouse, i haven’t tried this style with my drawing tablet yet), i really like what i did here skjdgs small boy • there’s two background characters with names, there’s a girl named allegra with a huge nose and some pig looking gremlin critter named clifton, i think that’s interesting • is it like a cultural thing for all the thieves to have earrings or did the character designers just go “yeah only punks have piercings” • sonia’s being really mean about their music for no reason when it doesn’t sound awful, just let these kids play their accordions and violins in peace dude • manic is a gross boy and spits all over this girl to show off one of his little tricks, disgusting • the headcanons about dingo involved something about this episode i think, i’d have to go digging through dms to remember tho • there’s this bird character between allegra and clifton who looks depressed as shit • sleet looks ugly enough to be a passable spore creature and i might just try that if i have to look at his nasty face any longer • i understand what manic means when he’s like “haha this whole thing reminds me of when i was little and stole shit all the time” because i was a little kleptomaniac when i was a kid and like... getting away with it is fun as shit. of course i feel bad now but like... hey i get it • for once the siblings yelling out of surprise has some energy to it, though i wish it was less like “oh aah” and more like... y’know, actual startled sounds, it’s not super convincing • sleet is standing there with his gaping maw wide open pointing in one direction with no animation like a statue and it’s weird • swatbots are on the same level of aiming as storm troopers • what even are these lasers? are they lethal?? do they hurt??? i don’t think anyone’s gotten hit from what i remember so like what’s the danger • sonic just fucking... vaccums up all these children with wind from running, he’s gonna hurt someone, he’s so damn reckless • WHERE’D THEY GO • the little animation where manic takes out his drums doesn’t look half bad! it’s a pleasant surprise when bits of animation are higher quality than normal

• after saying that i realized his gloves disappeared in the shot i was just praising sndkgjds • how was the production of this show? did they color digitally or was this still in the time of hand-drawn animation cells? i wonder how rushed production was • is “amigas” proper spanish?   [googling]   yes it is nevermind   spanish class as a required class was pointless apparently because i don’t remember jack shit from it • dingo you aren’t allowed to steal the “main man” title from manic (my nickname in our discord server was “my main man, manic” for the longest time sjkdgbs)

• it’s kinda neat seeing where all these pics my boyfriend gave me when i was looking for refs came from • i’ve thought that a song was gonna play tiwce now so now i’m wondering when it’ll come in and if it’ll be plot relevant • bummer majores • i get the point of “aw man i can’t believe you have to give all this money to robotnik because he’s evil and demands taxes” but hey either tax the rich or eat them dude • this old man’s outfit is horrendous • sonic and sonia just hid behind behind a thing hanging on the wall and that just wouldn’t work • manic and max both like drums... ;v; • why are manic and dingo just throwing glass bottles and shit back and forth at each other, is this a game • DINGO YOU HURT THE BOY • god what are these masks • SONG TIME • again, manic’s just talking in the middle of the song, and i get it’s for plot but the visuals are, again, sickeningly distracting, i can’t tell what’s happening • how does nobody notice the drummers changing place in the middle of the performance? how is there not a gap in the drum/cymbal beats? • these poor children, wow dingo • it’s really sweet that this old man helped the thief kids find parents and homes to go back to, that’s very nice • manic has one (1) coin and everyone takes that as evidence that he robbed the old man of all his money when that also doesn’t make sense, yes he took it from the vault thing but he didn’t take the whole thing? • why does manic just let the robot handcuff him, i know he feels guilty but like he isn’t an idiot, he knows what’ll happen if he does that so why does he??? • why do sonic and sonia immediately believe what sleet says about manic, shouldn’t they be on guard whenever this fuck’s around and have some suspension of belief here • this man went from 0 to 100 real quick huh • SONG TIME??? • i forgot that the song already happened because of my confusion during the sequence and now i feel like an idiot • anyway the song was like a 5.5/10, it has the energy i think they were going for and it doesn’t sound awful, it’s a little better than alright, though i wish the scene was more coherent and easy to follow • sonia’s classist as hell damn • sonic’s faith in manic being honest is nice to see • the thief children didn’t get their homes after this?? i’m upset • two bros laughing manically in the sewer in front of a very small crowd of children, as you do • manic talking to himself in jail kinda reminds me of movie!sonic but like... slower and less interesting, also why do they just throw him in jail? doesn’t robotnik roboticize everyone? • that one kid dares to look in max’s direction and he’s like ShShHhH like your hushing is gonna get you caught dude not that kid • MAX IS THROWING METAL THINGS IN THE BACKGROUND WHY??? YOU WERE SHUSHING THAT KID FOR SAYING NOTHING • max should be like... directly in sleet’s line of sight rn • of course they gotta very clearly explain the plot directly to the audience • everyone’s so shitty to these poor kids, damn • you’d think that huge laser blast would have injured manic in the process of blowing a hole in the wall • why’s sonia so concerned about the police chasing them? aren’t the police chasing them all the time? • manic nyooms again when he gets out of the van • these robots aren’t observant at all are they • for once, reusing animation makes sense • yay the poor kids get homes now • as nice as this ending is, it isn’t easy to kick bad habits like thievery, especially when it’s like... part of your nature at that point? it’s odd

• god the perspective • also, this is exactly why i give everyone on this blog extended muzzles and more clear divides between their eyes when they’re looking to the side, otherwise they look cursed • IT’S TIME TO JUICE AND JAM

[state-of-longing]

53 reddie pls?

This was a one-shot I had already half-written so thank you for this prompt! It got me to finish a year old WIP. I hope you like it. Keep an eye out for a few references from The OC.

53. “Are you jealous? That’s cute.”

‘I don’t like him.’

‘Who? Tony?’

‘Oh, is that his name?’

‘Beep beep, Richie...’ It was quite early in the school day for Beverly to be exasperated with him, it didn’t usually happen until after the lunch bell. She was resting her head on her locker, trying to find some relief as Richie spoke animatedly in her ear.

‘I thought his name was Gerald...’

‘Richie —’

‘Or Assface. It’s easy to get those confused.’

Richie hadn’t met Tony, he only knew that he transferred to Derry High a week ago and was sitting next to Stan in AP History. He didn’t even know he’d been introduced to the other Losers until two seconds ago when he saw them all congregated in front of Stan’s locker.

‘Don’t do this Richard...’

‘Do what, my dear?’

But now he’d seen Tony talking to all of his friends as though he’d known them for years. And something about the whole scene just bothered him. Something about the way Eddie was hanging on to his every word made him incredibly annoyed...

‘Don’t get jealous of the new kid.’

‘Jealous? Who’s jealous? Why would I be jealous of Joseph?’

‘Oh, so you don’t care that Eddie is hanging onto his every word right now?’

That was the annoying part about talking to Beverly Marsh, she always saw through the bullshit. Even though she’d hit the nail right on the head, Richie would never admit that to her. He’d never admit that the thought of Eddie enjoying anyone else’s company, especially that of someone who was ‘conventially’ attractive and kind of smart, bothered him. Not at all. So instead, Richie did what he’d perfected over the years - he deflected.

‘Smoke another bowl, Molly Ringwald—’

‘I fucking hate when you —’

‘— I don’t care that Eddie thinks he’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. I care about my friends and I just don’t trust that guy.’

‘Give me one reason why?’

‘...his eyes are too close together.’

‘You’re an idiot.’

‘And the guy has 20/20 vision? What the fuck is up with that?’

Before Richie could continue on his tirade about assholes who don’t wear glasses, he was interrupted by obnoxiously loud laughter coming from the group by Stan’s locker.

This was a development that was disturbing to Richie for two reasons:

1. Stan was laughing. He couldn’t remember the last time he heard Stanley ‘Urine’ laugh. Ever. And he’d known that kid his whole life. It wasn’t even a little polite chuckle hidden behind a hand or that handkerchief he kept in his back pocket. This was a giant belly laugh that echoed down the hallway. It was a laugh that took over his whole body and made his curls bounce. Stan Uris was fucking snorting with laughter.

2. Eddie was bent over, leaning on Bill’s shoulder as he too was overcome with laughter. Even more horrifying was that when he stood back up he had tears streaming down his cheeks. The sight felt like being punched in the gut. The only time he’d ever seen Eddie laugh like that was because of a joke Richie had made. Eddie only laughed like that at his jokes.

As far as he could tell, this Tony asshole wasn’t even telling a real zinger. Instead, he was walking up and down the hall doing some stupid bird impression. His arms were wings and his legs were bent at the knees as he waddled around. That impression was really that funny?

Richie knew from experience that he couldn’t take the rest of his friend’s reactions as any indicator for how funny this guy was. Bill was chuckling but ole’ Big Bill had never told a joke in his entire life. Sweet Haystack was so nice he would laugh just out of politeness. Richie wished Mike went to school with them because that guy was at least an arbiter of comedic taste.

‘Wow, Tony is pretty funny,’ Beverly sounded far too amused as she picked at lint on Richie’s shirt.

That comment also ruled out Bev.

‘No he’s not. Why would you say that?’

She smiled knowingly and Richie shook away her fussing hands. He hated that smile and the power it held over him. How did she just know everything?

‘Just the laughs coming from Eddie. And Stan. Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever heard Stan laugh.’

‘He’s not funny.’

The laughing continued as Tony continued his impression and relished in the group’s attention. The guy was driving the joke into the ground. What an amateur.

‘He’s big. That’s not necessarily funny’, Richie continued and tried to distract himself from the dull ache in his chest as he watched Eddie follow the group towards their next class. His eyes were shining, cheeks flushed from all the laughter and Richie wished he had caused it. ‘And the guy does impressions? That’s just so cheap.’

‘Richie. All you do is impressions,’ Beverly’s smile faded as she closed her locker and turned to face him. Richie had a sneaking suspicion his poker face wasn’t holding up.

He really couldn’t handle the pity today.

‘Got any smokes Red? I need to get outta here.’

——

Richie had been trying to study for his physics quiz for over two hours and nothing was sinking in. All he had been able to think about all night was Eddie and that laugh. Daydreaming about Eddie wasn’t a new pastime for Richie, he’d been doing it since he was 13 years old, but this time he felt something else.

Something that made all of his ugly insecurities rise up like bile in his throat. Kicking back from his desk, giving up on studying altogether, he stood in front of his full-length mirror and sighed. This was as good as it was gonna get.

Mr ‘I Have One Impression and Will Ram It Down Your Throat’ was conventionally handsome, Richie supposed. He seemed the type who liked participating in school sports unironically and he had the build to match. He was tan and had effortlessly styled hair that just screamed cool and casual.

Richie was almost seventeen and still hadn’t grown into his limbs. He was all gangly bones and arms and legs. He was so pale that if sun touched any part of his skin he burned to a crisp. That meant he copped an earful from Eddie who was always chastising him for not wearing sunscreen. His hair now ruefully curled in a way that was nowhere near cool or casual. Just messy.

On impulse, just to see if any definition had taken over his body or he’d suddenly been bitten by a radioactive spider, Richie pulled off his t-shirt. Nope, still shaped like a beanpole. He could see why Eddie would pay slightly more attention to Tony. Maybe tall, tan and unfunny was what Eddie was into. Maybe that’s who he wanted as a best friend now.

Or more. God, it hurt to think he could be wanting more...

‘Do you want some alone time with yourself?’

Richie was so wrapped up in his own pity party he hadn’t heard Eddie climb up the stairs to his bedroom. Richie’s parents were so used to Eddie hanging out at their house they just let him in now without question. That meant Richie was often caught in painful moments like this.

He was going to say something back, maybe a joke from his back catalogue about jacking off to thoughts of Eddie’s mom, but then he realised his shirt was off. Richie thought he saw a blush come across Eddie’s cheeks as he scanned his bare torso but a wave of embarrassment overtook those thoughts and he clumsily pulled his shirt back on.

‘Jeez Eds, take a picture next time. It’ll last longer.’

As he pulled the shirt over his head, glasses askew in his haste, he saw Eddie flip him off in the reflection of the mirror. Then he flung himself onto Richie’s bed, grabbing a comic book and making himself comfortable like he always did.

Richie took a moment to admire him under the guise of looking in the mirror. He forgot Eddie was wearing that blue collared shirt today...that was definitely a favourite.

‘Where were you this afternoon?’ Eddie’s voice cut through and Richie jumped, mortified that once again he’d gotten caught up in thoughts of his best friend.

‘Ditched with Bev. Hung out down at the quarry for a bit.’

‘Did you forget we were supposed to do something after school? I had no excuse to skip out on dinner with Sonia.’

Richie hadn’t forgotten. He normally took any excuse to spend more time with Eddie after school. But he’d felt like being petty today. Richie let out a huff and sat down on the bed, his knees knocking into Eddie’s just to annoy him.

‘Oh, you didn’t hang out with Larry today?’

Eddie frowned, the wheels in his head turning as he put down the comic. ‘Who the fuck is Larry?’

Richie just shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant as he too picked up a comic and pretended to flick through the pages. If Eddie didn’t know who Richie was talking about then maybe he didn’t think he was so memorable...

‘Wait, do you mean Tony? The guy from Stan’s history class?’

...or not.

Richie rolled his eyes and continued to look down, ‘Oh is that his name? I thought it was Jim Carrey...’

A feeling of white-hot annoyance ran down Richie’s spine and he continued spitefully when Eddie didn’t respond.

‘You know since he’s such a fan of physical comedy.’

‘Are you jealous?’ Eddie scoffed out, pushing Richie’s arm so he dropped the comic and had to look at him. His eyes were shining mischievously in the dim light of the bedroom and any thoughts of annoyance left Richie immediately. ‘That’s cute.’

Richie had to remember to catch his breath at the sight of him. Did he just say cute? Cute. That’s cute. He’s cute...

But then Eddie started to laugh, bringing Richie back to reality and any feeling of hope was squashed immediately. Richie tried to recover by pushing him back onto the bed as he continued to giggle.

‘Well, you thought he was fucking hilarious...’

‘Because he made Stan laugh! Stan! His snort was the highlight of my day!’

‘So you were laughing at Stan?’

‘Well yeah...like we always do. Tony’s bird impression wasn’t really funny. Like he’s big but big isn’t funny.’

Richie’s heart soared as Eddie decided the conversation was over and snatched up the comic he had dropped.

‘That’s exactly what I thought.’

Richie couldn’t wipe the grin from his face as he tried to control his heart rate. So much for a poker face, he was too happy. A small smile also graced Eddie’s features and he paused before opening the latest X-Men.

‘You have a smudge on your glasses again, doofus. How do you even see out of these things?’

Without hesitating, Eddie grabbed the frames off Richie’s face and started cleaning them with the bottom of his shirt. Richie couldn’t see a damn thing but knew his cheeks were burning in a way he couldn’t control.

‘So how about tomorrow? We could go to the arcade we haven’t been there in a while.’

Richie broke out his trance and quickly snatched his glasses back before Eddie could notice his hands start shaking. An overwhelming feeling of powerlessness and shame ran through his veins in a cold trickle. He hadn’t been back to that place in so long. He didn’t want to start now.

‘Nah Eds, the arcade is for babies,’ Richie cleared his throat and swallowed down the need to throw up. Before Eddie could protest he quickly continued, ‘How about we rent a movie? We can watch it in your room so I can pop in for some sweet lovin’ with Mrs K.’

Eddie looked concerned for a brief moment before frowning in disgust. Richie breathed out in relief, hoping he’d changed that subject for the time being. Deflection- it was his speciality nowadays.

‘Sure thing, asshole. Is The Mask available to rent?’ Eddie smiles knowingly and any feeling of hopelessness disappears from Richie’s mind for a moment. Only Eddie can do that to him.

‘Nice callback. You, me and Jim Carrey - it’s a date.’

And that slipped out so fast that Richie didn’t even have time to panic. He just had to play it cool and ignore the way his heart beat wildly in his chest.

But when he looked over at Eddie, he was smiling to himself, a slight flush taking over his cheeks.

‘See, now that’s funny.’

send me a prompt or request. i write reddie, mileven and jopper.

[deva-arts]

It's nice to see Sarah be a good parent. I personally want to see more of Nathaniel as a father. Is he kind? strict?

Nathaniel loves Sophie to bits, and is a doting father that borders on spoiling her too much. He knows what the baby is crying about, how to deal with a tantrum or stubbed toe... The issue ironically lies in his hindsight.

He will try to be strict and enforce rules, but Sophia has such a precious thought process behind her behavior that makes it a bit hard to not just get her what she wants. Sure, she drew on the walls, but she wanted to make a mural to make her family happy... Hey, how about we make this one square a drawing wall? You're such an artist! I love you!

So Sera has to crack down on some of the more egregious green lights on Nate's end. No, we cannot get a cat. No, we are not getting a dog either. No, you aren't going to fly today, you have schoolwork. No, you can't get Vincent to do it for you. Sera feels some type of way about being the one who shuts down her proposals, and... It hurts to see that her daughter stops going to her to request things. Does she view Sera as too strict? Is she the bad guy to her own daughter? where was the trust she held before? It's never easy delivering unwanted news.

She has a serious talk with Nathaniel about this because clearly they take different approaches to rearing children, and she doesn't want to keep feeling like her daughter finds her unsupportive. While Nathaniel's idea is "set ground rules but let the child be encouraged in their endeavors to see what blooms from there, even if some eggs are broken in the process", Sera's idea is "Raise the child with discipline so that she can grow to be responsible, well rounded, and educated while also respecting the home."

Sera takes her parenting style from her mother (and to Sera, harsh training was what helped her survive in torturous ordeals she would face later.) She considers proper formation to be paramount to success, and has little idea of what a properly nurturing mother should be. Her idea of love is discipline. Her idea of care is making you self-sufficient. This is something that has remained a constant in her life. Even the weakest character can be molded into a precious yet lethal instrument. Sophie can use that instrument to forge her own path.

Nathaniel takes his parenting style from his lack of parental figures. To him, he considers his past life's tendencies and complexes to have stemmed from no proper guidance or prompting to be kind towards others. He was raised to be a faceless manipulator, and that's what he became. He thinks, "Maybe things would have been different if someone had pushed me in the right direction. Told me there were better things I could do with myself." His idea of love is being sweet and supportive, and his idea of care is giving Sophie what he never had. Children are not clay, and he is no longer a fan of moulding others. She can grow outside of the world he and Sera are chained to.

Nate loves teaching her how to shift, and Sera takes a soft, mirthful sort of joy in teaching her how to fly. They both work on educational planning on late nights, and the others have somehow butted themselves in. Sonia loves doing basic arts and crafts with her, Vincent proudly shows her times tables before she's six, Eric tries his best to help her learn how to breakdance with wings, and Amon teaches her how to swim. It takes a village, right?

Sera can be too hard, and Nathaniel can be too soft. Sera wants to make her succeed through forging by fire, and Nathaniel wants her to pursue success by her terms, though this open aired freedom could easily set for poor behavior down the line. Sera has trouble being as affectionate as Nathaniel, while Nathaniel has trouble trying to shape her. But one thing rings true- they reinforce the other's weak points, and do their best to make Sophie have a fulfilled life. Because they love her with all their heart.

[ifyoucouldholdme]

The Six Dates of Eddie Kaspbrak

Chapter 2

Read on AO3

Chapter 1

Words: 1975

Pairing: Reddie

TW: Eating Disorder

The next morning Eddie fluttered awake to the unusual absence of a particular mop headed dork. Richie normally snored in a tussled heap well after Eddie rose for the day, forcing the other to crawl over his sprawling limbs to escape their wadded sheets. Today, though, the spread had been neatly laid down and tucked around Eddie. The smell of coffee brought him sweetly out of his dreams.

               “Richie?” he mumbled, still in a lifting haze. Richie never woke up early, much less make the bed or start coffee. A wrinkled letter folded on the nightstand caught Eddie’s eye. With a hefty sense of suspicion, he unfolded the note.

               My dearest, darlingest Edward Spaghettward,” it began. Eddie chuckled a low, “Even in a note, asshole?” and continued reading.

               “You’ve been working real hard lately, what with the studying, and the papers, and the chronic masturbation.” Eddie cringed. “You deserve some good clean fun. We’ve put together a little surprise for you. Be at the mall by noon today. Don’t be late or you won’t get any of this sweet ass for the foreseeable future. –Richie”

               “Bold of you to assume that I want your crusty ass,” Eddie smirked. With Richie, you could never guess what to expect. Eddie stretched with a yawn. “Guess I’m going shopping today.”

  The open lobby in which Eddie perched in waiting could hardly qualify as a mall at this point. It was more a few specialty shops interspersed with vacant hollows where other doomed businesses once profited. He sat on a bench between two such plots situated directly across from an alternative fashion boutique. Glimpses of band apparel and various jewelry and accessories peered out from behind the poster covered windows at Eddie in his plain khakis and polo. The store was what his mother referred to as a “tramp’s palace.”

               As a teenager, she refused to let him wear jeans at all, much less all black with a studded belt. The cartoonish image of Sonia’s overexaggerated scream which suddenly sprung to mind brought a snort out of him.

               “What’cha laughing at?”

               The snort turned into a shriek. Eddie nearly toppled out of his seat. Looking over his shoulder, he met eyes with a giggling Beverly Marsh. Her smile beamed down at him, probably due to the shimmering bronzer she wore, but partly, he thought, because Bev just had that kind of sunshine within her already.

               “Holy shit, Bev! You could’ve sent me into a cardiac arrest!” he scolded her. Beverly just winked in reply. “You’re not as fragile as you think, Eddie. You ready to go?”

               Eddie’s brow knotted in confusion. “Go where?”

               “Of course,” Bev rolled her eyes, “Richie didn’t explain anything, did he?” Richie never explained anything, at least not in any comprehensible way.

               “Apparently not. He just left me a note this morning saying to meet him at the mall by twelve.”

               “That goof,” Bev chuckled as she hopped in front of the bench. “Edward Kaspbrak, it is my pleasure to invite you to Eddie Spaghetti Week!”

               With a look of patient annoyance, he deadpanned, “Eddie Spaghetti Week?”

               “That’s right!” She smirked and gave an enthusiastic thumbs up. “Each day this week, you’re going out on a special date with each of us. So, come on!”

               Eddie’s confusion swiftly turned to anxious embarrassment. His cheeks flushed, and his palms grew sweaty. “A d-date?” he stammered.

               “Don’t worry, silly,” she reassured, pulling the anxious boy to his feet, “they’re platonic dates. Well, at least mine is.”

               Wait, what? “What does that mean?” Beverly may or may not have heard, but either way she changed the subject and pulled Eddie towards the forbidden tramp store.

               “For my date with you, we’re going to give you a makeover!” Eddie instinctively opened his mouth to refuse, but this was finally an excuse to see what lay behind the barricade of posters. As loud as his mother’s voice was in his head, his curiosity shouted louder.

               Eddie’s hands trembled inside his pockets as he followed Beverly throughout the store. The day he finally stood up to his mother in the Derry hospital happened so long ago, yet he could still hear the piercing rattle of her voice warning him against the sin of the heavy metal bands and the black fingernail polish which now caught his eye. He recalled the day she caught him watching MTV. That day he learned all about Satan worshipping rock stars, the risk of AIDS from sharing needles with other drug addicts, and the homosexual snares of men wearing eyeliner. He knew somewhere on a conscious level that his mother’s hatred was just emptiness fueled by fear and ignorance, but that sense of shame she left behind still embedded itself deep in his bones.

               Beverly, having already found a basket full of makeup and skirts to try, rounded the corner to find Eddie lost in his thoughts while mournfully gazing at a display of studded wristbands and chokers. “Grab some, Eddie, and we’ll see how they look.” Eddie turned with the expression of someone who’s name was just called for the draft. “I…that’s…I wouldn’t be able to pull off a look like that Beverly…”

               The epitome of encouragement, Bev rolled her eyes with a smile and grabbed a handful of the accessories. “You totally can, honey. I’ve already grabbed you some outfits. Let’s try them out!” Eddie sputtered out excuses and denials, but Beverly took none of it. She grabbed him by the elbow and rustled him to the changing rooms.

                 Beverly must have had a drastically different concept of what fashion worked on Eddie than he did himself. He could see himself wearing the graphic tees, although some of them were a little overboard in their intense imagery. However, she had thrown him several pairs of skinny jeans over the changing stall door. The self-loathing mounted higher with each pair he tried on. Most felt like they fit. He could still bend his knees and squat down without splitting anything, thank God, but he wouldn’t dare wear anything so form fitting in public. He didn’t want to force anybody else to see the shape of his body, at least until he could force himself to slim down again. Lately he felt the pull to once again slide down the path of eating nothing but a piece of boiled chicken and two large cups of coffee a day. The last time, before he broke down, he was able to at least drop three sizes. He didn’t reach the goal he wanted, but at least he was skinnier than he was now.

               “Oh my God, Eddie, we have to get this one for you,” Bev decided, and she tossed a top over the door. Eddie caught the bundle of fabric and unfolded it. “I can’t wear this, Beverly!” he cried. The woman had thrown him a damn long sleeve crop top!

               “Just try it on Eddie. You’re going to look bitchin’, trust me.” Eddie wanted to trust the caring voice outside the changing stall, but she didn’t know. She didn’t understand how disgusting he looked. With a huff before he could change his mind, he slipped the shirt over his torso. As he looked in the mirror, he liked the style, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the midriff he despised so terribly. That was the final shot to his composure. He dropped to the bench behind him, tears finally overtaking him.

               “Eddie,” Bev’s voice floated through the door, much softer than before, “is everything ok in there?”

               “Fine. Can we stop now?” he sniffed loudly.

               “Can you at least let me see how it looks?”

               Eddie scoffed. “There’s no way in Hell I’m coming out dressed like this.”

               “Ok, then, I’m coming in there” Eddie panicked, turning just in time to see Beverly crawling under the stall door.

               “What the hell, Bev?” he whispered loudly. She stood, dusting herself off. She held a small bag of things she must have already purchased as he was going through the outfits they selected. She saw the tears falling down his face even though he tried to hide them. With a heartbroken smile, she kneeled beside Eddie, taking his hand in hers. “Eddie, honey, if you really don’t like this stuff, we don’t have to try any more on. But I saw you looking at some of the styles out there. You didn’t look like someone who absolutely didn’t want to try them out. I’d like to show you that you can try for anything you want to try, but I need you to trust me. Will you? At least enough to try and see what I see in you?”

               The sudden intimacy of the moment made him squirm in uncomfortable closeness. His entire childhood was spent denying anything he wanted himself, from wanting to date boys even to the clothes on his back. Beverly’s loving support was new to him, but he wanted to try. If not for himself, he could try for her. “Ok, Bev,” he whispered.

               “That’s my Eddie,” She beamed. It turned out, inside the bag was some hair gel, eyeliner, and various wristbands. She even brought out the studded choker that caught his eye before. After a moment, she had transformed him entirely with just a few simple adjustments. She swiftly swooped his hair into an oddly fitting mohawk, slicking every strand up to a fine point. His eyes watered badly when she tried to apply the makeup under his eyes, but after a few blinks and touch ups, he looked like a punk straight out of the rock concert. She placed the finishing touches with the wristbands and the choker and painted his fingernails black and yellow. “There we go,” she whispered, pulling out her phone, “You look fierce as fuck, Eddie. See?” She snapped a picture with her phone and presented it to a blushing Eddie.

               “Wow…that can’t be me…”

               “I told you to trust me. You definitely rock the punk look.” Eddie still felt ashamed of how much of himself could be seen in this outfit, but he had to admit that Beverly was right. He did look pretty punk. She raised the phone again. “How about you give me your best punk face?”

               Eddie thought for a moment, then made a face more bizarre than he intended. Beverly guffawed loudly, clasping a hand over her mouth as she remembered they were still in one changing stall. “Ok, I don’t know what face that was, but it was hilarious. Give me another one.” Eddie cracked a smile, then dragged his hands down his face and stuck out his tongue making a comedically grotesque expression. Beverly cackled, not caring who heard her this time. “Oh my God, what the hell is that supposed to be?”

               Eddie giggled wildly. “That’s what Richie looks like when he wants to make out.” The two carried on like this over several more poses in their impromptu photoshoot. Eventually, they exited the changing rooms and bought their choices before they could be kicked out. As they caught the bus back to the dorms, Eddie was too caught up in spending time with Bev to focus on whether people were staring at his weight or his clothing. He felt for once that he could be what he wanted. He rested his head on her shoulder, careful not to stab her with his now tall hairstyle. “Thank you Bev,” he whispered as he flipped through their pictures on his phone.

               She grabbed his hand and leaned into him as well. “Trust me Eddie. You are fierce enough to be anybody you want to be. Don’t forget that.” They fought to stay awake the rest of the ride home. As his mind wandered, he couldn’t guess how the others were going to top this day with Beverly. -  

[unyiclding]

—— ❝ the basics. ❞

[ name ] siobhan chanthavy keo

[ verse ] xx

[ date of birth ] may 13th, 1984

[ place of birth ] detroit, michigan

[ age ] 38

[ religion ] agnostic

[ marital status ] single

[ occupation ] registered nurse

[ gender identity ] cisfemale

[ spoken language(s) ] english ( first )

[ special skill(s) ] interacting with patients, athletics, some science subjects

—— ❝ the family. ❞

[ father ] gerard o’sullivan ( alive )

[ mother ] sonia keo ( deceased )

[ sibling(s) ] isabelle o’sullivan ( younger half-sister, alive )

[ children ] n/a

—— ❝ the appearance.. ❞

[ height/weight ] 5′4 ft / 120 lbs

[ build ] petite, slender

[ hair color ] black

[ eye color ] deep brown

[ accent ] american ( detroit )

[ voice ] warm and rich, deeper on the register

[ style of speech ] orotund, sure

[ scars ] n/a

[ clothing ] siobhan is usually wearing scrubs due to working long shifts at the hospital, though she usually favours jeans and a simple t-shirt when she’s off-duty

—— ❝ the person. ❞

[ star sign ] taurus – this sign can attack, but only if provoked by one too many red flags. she has a hot and fiery temper, and will unleash it when pushed to the limits; however, taurus women are generally sweet-natured, with a liking for affection. taureans are known for being patient, slow moving and careful creatures -- they love to prolong and savour the enjoyable times. they appreciate and often need comfort, ease and warm surroundings. you require strenuous situations in order to grow and mature properly, even though you try to avoid them. affectionate, even-tempered and slow to anger -- when they do become emotionally upset, they are also quite slow to forgive and time must pass before her calm returns. they also demand real results from any situation they might find themselves in. taurus women portray an earthy, physical sexiness that others find quite seductive, and their ability to hang on through tough times and bad -- as well as her emotional strength -- make taurean women a force to be reckoned with.

[ alignment ] chaotic good

[ enneagram type ] the challenger

[ colour personality ] palevioletred ( #d87093 ) – you love doing your own thing and going on your own adventures, but there are close friends you know you just can't leave behind. you can influence others on days when you're patient, but most times you just want to go out, have fun, and do your own thing. you don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan. your outlook on life is bright. you see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.

[ what plants best represent you ] echinacea – a protector. with an amazing blend of optimism, nurturing and goodwill, you lend your strength and energy to those in need. your seemingly infinite goodwill and boundless supportive energy make you the one people turn to when times are tough. your greatest strength is, of course, also one of your weaknesses, especially if you neglect to take care of yourself. at times like these, it’s a good idea to take a step back and focus some of that protective energy on yourself. ginger – spirited. a feisty and fiery companion, quick with an opinion, a laugh or an idea. warm, friendly and inviting, you never allow an awkward moment to pass. in fact, even cold and distant people warm up to you more quickly than others. negative experiences or too much indulgence, however, can send you into a bit of a tailspin, and when hurt you may become quite cold and distant. ginger people do best when their natural warmth and affection is flowing freely, giving them easy access to their love of life. nettle – truly a nurturing and supportive friend, you’re the kind of person that just isn’t for everyone. but those who take the time are rewarded with your gentle disposition, and the kind of friendship that does a person good no matter the difficulty they’re facing. when out of balance, you can become more prickly than supportive or nurturing, though—a sign that you need to shower yourself with the same kind of nurturing you so freely give to others.

[ theme/character song ] no air by jordin sparks feat. chris brown

—— ❝ their story. ❞

basically, siobhan is a product of an affair between a wealthy business magnate and her mother, who worked within his company at the time. so as to not lose her job, diana’s mother didn’t give her daughter his last name, nor tell him. honestly, siobhan is totally okay with that. she doesn’t really respect her father at all, having heard several stories about how he had numerous affairs while he was married. he was never a part of her life so she’s kind of indifferent to the thought of him -- the only thing that actually ties her to him is her Irish name. her mother has always been very open with siobhan from the beginning about who her father was and her half-sibling(s), which she appreciates.

she grew up in a shitty neighborhood in michigan because it was kind of all her mom could afford? sonia worked close to three jobs at any given time to make sure sio had a seemingly normal life – seeing as how her biological father didn’t even know about her, let alone support her. it was rough, but her mom is literally the strongest person she knows and is her hero.

it was really important for sonia that her daughter had an outlet growing up; something to provide routine and to keep siobhan off the streets. she’s always been in organized sports/activities, and is really grateful that she was allowed the opportunity to explore her interests.

it was in high school that she first met dante. for a guy who seemed to intimidate the shit out of most people, he was so good to her. they were hardened when on their own -- but it was around each other that they seemed to melt. no one ever saw one without the other. and while she doesn’t have the best memory, siobhan vividly remembers their youth.

dante and siobhan were together for almost an entire decade. however, siobhan did eventually leave him. she always knew that he was a criminal; but the severity of his crimes steadily began to increase as the years passed. it changed him, and he grew violent – and while she knew the man she loved wouldn’t dare lay a finger on her, she just couldn’t be sure anymore. it was possibly one of the hardest decisions she’s had to make, but sio could no longer enable or tolerate his behaviour, nor did she want to become an accessory to any of his crimes. he was later convicted and sent to prison.

siobhan has worked shitty retail jobs since before she can remember, all to help her mother pay for her four-year bachelors degree in nursing. once she graduated, sio went on to become a licensed registered nurse. she then continued her studies and received a master of science nursing, and works now as a nurse practitioner ( and has hella student loans to pay ). but regardless, her mom was so proud of her for working so hard and doing everything that she could to help.

tw: death her mother was killed six years ago in a car accident, and siobhan really couldn’t handle or process the loss. her mother was the only constant in her life, and she wasn’t sure how to exist in a world without her. she never really got a chance to mourn her mom’s death and she’s still really broken, but just powers through each day, looking for anything to take her mind off of it. will never admit any of this to anyone though – most people don’t even know her mother died because she likes to keep her personal life super lowkey.

regardless of their breakup before he was incarcerated, she’s made a great effort to keep in touch with him; phone calls whenever possible and regular visits when it’s permitted. he’s recently been released, and siobhan is really the only support system he has left. being with her is the safest place for him to be right now. 

[jarmes]

Blind Shield Nuzlocke Notes 10 (Finale)

-Starting off the tenth and possibly final session

-Current Team: Freight the Coalossal, High Voltage the Toxtricity, Nosferatu the Dreadnaw, Riot the Falinks, Snowball the Frosmoth, Warrior the Grapploct

-I updated Warrior’s moves in preparation for Raihan, he now knows Drain Punch Waterfall Superpower and Ice Punch

-Even though Raihan is a dragon specialist, I’m not using Snowball. Last time he led with a Gigalith so I’m leading with Nosferatu and Warrior

Raihan

-Oh god he reworked his team for one on one battles there goes my plan

-Why the FUCK does he have a torkal

-Like, from a story perspective, why would he try to take out Charizard boi with a drought Pokémon?

-Whatever I’ll just use rock side

-OH FUCK IT MISSED AND NOW NOS HAS NO HEALTH SWITCHING TO FREIGHT

-Okay, it tanked a solar beam and it tanked a rock slide

-Second rock slide killed

-Raihan switched to Flygon, I switched to Snowball. Flygon Used sandstorm

-I’d use quicker dance, but I can’t risk a stone edge so I’m using Aurora beam

-Well, it used dragon claw so I messed up

-Turtonator? Time to switch back to freight and take no damage from that fire blast

-Rock slide, sunny day, miss, dragon pulse, rock slide, dead

-He sent out Goodra, dynamaxing and using Max rockfall

-Raihan Used rain dance? This team has a lot less synergy than the last one. Whatever, canceled it out with max rockfall

-Raihan made it rain, AGAIN, and died to a third max rockfall. Which made it sandstorm

-Unfortunely, dynamax wire off and he switched to GM Duraldon. Switching to Tiot cause freight is low

-Tanked a Max rockfall and Max knuckle, took half with a Brick Break

-OH GID MAX DEPLETION PUT ME AT 8 HP AND THERES A SANDSTORM

-Thank god, Close Combat killed and the battle ended

-Now for champion Leon and/or Tesla CEO Rose

Leon

-Dont know what he’ll use except Charizard and possibly Sobble. Putting Snowball up front because I know Charizard will be last and I may be able to sweep with quiver dance

-The cheering of the crowd fills you with determination

-“Wait, hold on!” Goddamn it rose

-“It’s time I brought about the darkest day, for Galars future of course” it’s called the darkest day you can’t be an antivillain and still call your plan the darkest day

-I knew dragonville tower was evil plan place

-“But you’re terrible at directions, what if you get lost along the way?”

-Hop acknowledges the fact that he sucks good

-Hell yeah! Going back to the slumbering weald to catch god!

-Oh sweet a life orb giving it to Warrior

-I’m glad they brought back the evil team interrupts the elite four thing from black and white

-Shield dog is in front because it is important

-Sonia can’t see god dogs because Sonia isn’t a stand user

-Getting Zelda vibes

-Honestly, the Shield is more fitting for a Nuzlocke than the sword. You aren’t trying to destroy, you’re trying to survive, to protect the team members you care about

-The dogs are dead, aren’t they

-I’m actually surprised I’m not just fighting Shield dog, this is different

-The leaders evacuated Hammerlocke, making themselves useful

-How did hop get past Oleana?

-Hey! It’s good mook! I forgot to mention her earlier but she’s cool

-Rampaging dynamax pokemon in the power plant hell yeah

-Eternatus! The least kept secret in the game! I’ve seen this thing and it’s cool and I’m glad I get to fight it instead of waiting for ultra Shield

-Leon’s fighting on the roof like a badass

-Is that an egg

-Ooh summoning Satan to use as green energy what could go wrong

-THAT CHOIR

Rose

-I still have Snowball out front

-And he’s using escavalier. Time for freight to continue carrying this team

-Uh oh swords dance

-Nevermind, outsped it ant took it out with heat crash

-“You’re go tough that’s not fair” life isn’t fair bitch

-Ferrothorn, really?

-It survived a heat crash. Operative word being A, because the second one killed it

-Rose, I know why Leon beat you as a kid. It’s because you exclusively use steel types and he has a goddamn Charizard

-Klingklang got off two wild charges but it’s dead now

-Freight’s at half health and can take out purrserker, but I don’t want to switch into Rose’s GM anchor so I’m going to Riot

-Took a lot of damage in the switch, but took it out with a Max knuckle

-“I’ll show you a move that hits so hard you’ll be speechless” I doubt it

-OH GOD FAIRY MOVE

-Whatever it’s dead now

-That chuckle and clap, gg mate

-“Leon is just like a knight in shining armor coming to rescue the princess from a dragon!” Glad pokemon is finally giving lgbt representation

-Leon caught eternatus doggie doggie what now

-Side note, I just realized I haven’t used any of my dynamax candy yet. Used them all of Nosferatu for obvious reasons

-And Leon hasn’t defeated eternatus yet great

-A fucking pokeball, Leon? Really?

-Okay were fighting this thing now I guess

Eternatus

-Snowball dodged a flamethrower out of love and took away half of eternatus’s health with aurora beam!

-Switching to Freight, tanked a dragon pulse. Almost died to a crit dragon pulse, but got it into red with a rock slide

-Switched to Nos, took slightly less than half damage from a dragon pulse

-Killed it with ice fang

-OH GOD IT DYNAMAXED

-Time for round 2?

-ITS A RAID BATTLE WIRH HOP!

-Oh god Snowball can’t attack and Eternatus is storing power

-Time for sword and shield

-The gods dogs jesused and teleported to us! They saved Snowball!

-And now we’re in box art form!

-Now it’s a real max raid battle! We got four fighters, three of which exist solely to take hits for Snowball

-It’s potswick! Wait, no, it’s everywhere!

-God dogs have abilities that buff each other that’s cool

-Shield dog uses light screen and sword dog used howl!

-Good job Snowball, tank that G-Move

-Eat Ice, dragon fuckboy

-Quiver dance time!

-Behemoth blade and bash!

-Snowball, put this mother fucker on ice

-Okay it would have been cooler if that killed but sure that’s fine

-And sword dog steals the kill!

-Oh, I have to catch it? I’d prefer to kill it but this is fine I guess

-I used an Ultra ball, Leon. Take notes

-Welcome to the box, Eternatus. Or should I say, “XD lol haha”

-Yeah I gave it a lame name because it’s evil

-Bye bye doggies

-Time to take on Leon, for real this time. I could swap someone for XD lol haha, but that isn’t my style. I’m winning this with the team that got me here. And also Warrior

-No major changes for the final battle. Swapped Freight’s Rocky Helmet and Nos’s Assault Vest, replaced Tar Shot with Giga Impact, and evened the team out to level 61 with rare candies

-I’ve loved this game and it’s climax, but the end is here. Let’s look over who we have with us. Also the only girl which is weird

-Freight, the longest lasting member of the team who’s carried me through countless battles

-HV, who I raised from a baby and is our greatest offensive powerhouse

-Nosferatu, who was brought on after the deaths of his brother Dracula and JORSTIN. He quickly proved himself a vital member of the team

-Riot, who fought his way on by killing Mondo and proved to useful to hate

-Snowball, a late member who I spent hours bonding with the evolve

-And Warrior, who I have literally never used in battle

-It’s time to take on Leon

Champion Leon

-He’s starting with an Aegislash, so I’m swapping Snowball for Freight

-Side note, the champion wielding aegislash is so fitting

-I love this theme

-Ha! It used King’s Shield!

-Sacred sword hurt, but Heat Crash took it out

-Swapped to Haxorus, I’m swapping to Snowball

-Good thing I did, cause he used earthquake

-Risking a quiver dance

-And he killed Snowball with iron tail fuck

-Time for Warrior to justify his existence!

-Almost died to outrage and only did half hp with ice punch good job buddy

-Now, this may seem mean, but I’m not going to switch. Letting Warrior die gives me a free switch to HV, who can take out Haxorus and sweep most of Leon’s team

-With Choice Scarf HV boombursted Haxorus to death

-Inteleon! Yes! He kept it!

-Critical hit! It’s dead now

-Mr Rhine tanked a boomburst and killed HV with psychic

-FUCK I THOUGHT IT WAS ICE NOW

-Going to Nos and Dming. Max rockfall crushed it

-Okay, Dragapukt is definetly a dragon flying. It paralyzed Nos with thunderbolt, but he’s still in the green

-Enter The Charizard

-You know, I mentioned my feelings about GM Charizard earlier and I’d like to reiterate it. I hate Charizard spam, but it is a cool design and I like the idea of the champion having a Charizard as a starter and having won at ten

-OH GOD MAX OVERGROWTH NOS IS DEAD

-Switching to Freight, it used Max Rockfall but I survived and got off a rock slide. I won’t survive another one so I’m switching to Riot

-Okay, Riot is in the green and Charizard isn’t giga anymore. Now what?

-And it killed Riot with Fire Blast

-Leon Used a full restore because he’s a cunt

-Okay, this is it. I’m ending this with a rock slide. For Apollo and Dracula and Bob Murray and Idol and JORSTIN and Ophelia and Mondo and Chaos and Pluck and Echo and Snowball and Warrior and High Voltage and Nosferatu and Riot and every Pokémon in the box and Freight and for me, I’m taking you down!

-It survives with a sliver of health

-And it died to the sandstorm I created

-It’s over. It’s finally over

-I mean, I know there will be a post credits battle because every game in the past six years has had one, but it’s over

-Ten days, ten posts, fifteen fallen friends, and it is finally over

-And what a final battle it was

-“Thank you for the greatest battle I’ve ever had” same brah

-To think that I, Blinkin, a young blind British boy with a dream could defeat every powerful trainer in the country in less than a fortnight

-Okay, while the credits roll I’d like to talk about this game. This isn’t a formal review, just some thoughts. This has been the most contentious pokemon game in a while and I’d like to say that I...absolutely loved it. The new Pokémon were creative and fun, the wild area was a great idea I’d love to see expanded in future games, dynamaxing was surprisingly tactical, the characters were surprisingly engrossing. This game was amazing. It wasn’t perfect (linearity, exp share always on, lack of turning animations), but most problems I can think of are nitpicks. But, of course, there is the Cufant in the room: Dexit. Dexit was horrible for collectors and some competitive battlers, I’m not denying that, and there are deeper conversations about game freak as a company that I’d like to have on a later date, but honestly? Dexit didn’t affect my enjoyment of the game at all. I almost exclusively do challenge runs, so I rarely care about the national dex or post game. And, as a game for challenge runs, this game is amazing. X and Y are actually some of my favorite Pokémon games to play just because there are so many different Pokémon and team combinations to try. I think those games had ~450 Pokémon in their regional dex and this game had about the same, and that really goes a long way. Take Black and White, for instance. How many Pokémon were in that game. You might say 500ish, but I don’t see it that way. There are 150 Pokémon you can catch. Less than that, counting version exclusives. So yeah, there were more Pokémon programmed into that game, but you don’t see most of them without importing them from another game. Even with Dexit, this game felt like it had more Pokémon than any I’ve ever played. And again, I feel for the collectors, but I’m not going to not enjoy a great game because of an aspect that doesn’t effect me at all. Let’s get off Dexit. There are two aspects of this game that stand out as especially good. The first is the Galar region. This region was filled with so much charm and care that I could barely put it down. I love Galar, this beautiful country filled with so much goddamn British culture that I can barely breathe. The second reason I love this game is the League. This game breathed new life into the series and featured hands down the best league in any game. I felt, more than in any game, like pursuing the title of Champion was my goal. The stadiums of cheering crowds, the tournament at the end, that brutal champion battle, I loved this league.

-Anyway, lets make fun of the credits

-Oh right, the art director was the Englishman

-Legit, the other guys at Gamfreak call him the Englishman in interviews. Anyway, that explains a lot about this game

-Rock band!

-Okay, these Pokémon are all based on the idea of hardcore British rock and the credits theme is very much not that

-Hey, gym banners.

-They have the fighting banner even though she is sword exclusive

-Side note, when the mentioned minor league leaders I hoped that they would be fightable. Maybe in the post game

-Oh right, in sword the ice towns leader uses rock types. Maybe a Coalossal for the steam theme?

-Oh hey Leon banner

-Yeah I don’t have a lot to say about credits

-WOLLOO

-Huh, no post credits battle

-Okay, Full disclosure, I was spoiled that you fight Hop in the forest and assumed that that would be the post credits scene. When I booted the game up again it showed the forest so I’m going to go check it out

-Thank you for the master ball old lady foster

-Okay Hop, lets go. You vs my remaining team

Hop

-Dubwool did jack shit and went down to two Heat Crashes

-Snorlax killed Freight with a High Horsepower

-You know what? Good job, kid. You earned this

-Now to send out XD lol haha end exterminate Hops fucking bloodline

-Oh, you used a full restore, Hoppy boy? Well, I don’t see why I shouldn’t use the thirty full restore in my bag to destroy everything you love

-Eat shit Hop

-“Congrats on Beating Leon” “It was nothing”

-Oh Sonia’s the Professor now okay

-Thank you for the book, it is going on eBay

-These men have sword and shield hair what the fuck

-You gave Sonia’s book one star? I’ll fucking kill you

-Who the fuck named their sons Sordbord and Shielbert

-I hate these men and want them dead

-Oh, you’re princes? A shame I don’t have any Pokémon who know guillotine

-Okay, Nofumi but somehow even more insufferable, I’ll take you out with my god

-So were doing the aftergame now extra long post I guess

-Of course he has a sirfetched

-What is a king to a god fuckboi?

-The god is me, by the way. Not Eternatus

-Goddamn it Hop

-Okay, fuck it. I can’t beat this losers with only Eternatus. Time to sacrifice XD lol haha to Ghiratina to bring my whole team back yes this is in the Nuzlocke rules

-Are they not going to give Sonia’s girlfriend a name?

-Dynamax In trufield better be something new and cool

-Ugh, it’s just leggy onion. Whatever, lets raid it

-That sounded better in my head

-RARE CARDS I WANT THEM

-God I hate these guys

-I can exaggerate? Hell yeah!

-Piers is an ex leader? So Marnie’s a leader now cool

-So am I just going to visit all of the leaders again? Well that part can be skipped in the notes unless something cool happens

-Okay, it was only the first trio

-Good time my team are immortal zombies because Sword jackass oneshoted freight with his golispod and shield bro one shotted Echo with his Falinks

-Nameless assistant! How dare you betray us!

-Okay, I’m out of battery. Delaying this post til tomorrow so I can finish the aftergame

-What’s up It tomorrow I killed a frosslass and Haxorus and dusknoir. Saved Bede for last because he’s a prick.

-Okay, Bede beat the dynamax pokemon on his own and wants a fight cool

-Side note, Rapidash and Hatterene are both psychic fairy and it’s a miracle I didn’t loose Echo to Bede in session 9

-Burn up is such a cool move

-It was fun beating you again Bede eat shit and die

-Yamper is a good boy

-Oh, douchebags are evil because we revealed historically accuracy that makes them look bad

-Stop being mad to god dogs

-Kill him sword dog! Do it!

-Side note, it’s interesting that this game features both legendaries pretty equally

-Okay sword dog is dead now where’s the real dog god

-Shield Dog! I’m glad you’re hear, but you don’t have to waste your time saving Hop. A little stabbing could help the boy

-Also both god dogs have messed up ears that’s interesting

-Eat the bad man, Shield Dog!

-Okay, I can catch Zamazenta now

-You know what’s bullshit? If I hadn’t messed up the the naming convention Zamazenta would have a Z name. I mean, I could skip to Z, but then there’d be no Y

-The shields fixed his ear cool

-Okay, I know I caught XD lol haha here, but I’ve already dropped Nuzlocke rules so I’m catching this good boy with the master ball

-Welcome to the team, Yorrick

-Okay, lets go kick Hops ass for a final time

-Legit I would not be able to beat Hops final team if I was still Nuzlocking

-You want to be a professor, Hop? Isn’t that sweet, you think you can get a doctorate

-YES! I AM THE KING NOW. AS FIRST DECREE I ABOLISH THE MONARCHY PLEASE DONT GUILLOTINE ME

-I know that the Battle Tower and League Rematches are in this game but I’m going to end this here. Thank you so much for reading and following me on this journey