#(( hes one of my favorite Zelda villains. step aside Ganondorf ~

[tenebriism]

// Weekly Munday randomness. Ghirahim and I are pretty much the same, minus the, uh... evil tendencies. ❤️

[starfaring-princelotor]

Ranting anon. I have a lot. I’ll try and split this into pieces. I wouldn’t say that Lotor was my absolute favorite character, but he was an enjoyable and interesting one. He was a more refined antagonist (not necessarily a villain) who had every capacity of being a great ally and friend. I won’t lie, I liked the idea of Allura and Lotor together, (1/?)

As a parallel to Zarkon and Honerva by being a Galra/Altean power couple that fought for good instead of evil. Lotor is clever and diplomatic and poised, so I honestly thought that he could help Allura cool down her impulsive nature and rash temper and help her become a good leader through example. (2/?)

But in the end, all we got was Lotor giving her an ego boost that in the end didn’t even matter because she dropped him like a hot potato in what feels like a forced “girl power!!” Moment. And I feel like that’s a big problem with how Allura’s character was handled. (3/?)

She’s meant to be this wise, kind, but fierce leader lady, but unlike say, Zelda (another warrior princess,) she doesn’t display the patience or level-headedness that Zelda does, despite people making numerous comparisons between the two. The argument that she’s inexperienced falls through halfway through the series at the very least. Allura never takes any steps to curb her temper or his pushy nature. (4/?)

And somehow no one calls her out on it! A big red flag for me was her reaction when Keith was revealed to be half galra and she just…turned fucking mean for no reason. And while Keith felt guilty for something he shouldn’t have felt guilty for, everyone else was…taking her side? (6/?)

And basically the matter is resolved by him mostly apologizing and her kind of mumbling a half-assed sorry. She was literally being racist to someone she called a friend right until she found out about his heritage. Despite him having done absolutely nothing to her. And no one called her out on it. That pissed me off. It feels like the paladins personalities suffered in order to make Allura look good. Like their moralities and personalities got tossed out the window to revolve around her. (8/8)

A forewarning to Lotura shippers, I never liked the ship in the first place, so if you are looking for validation about Lotura or even Allura herself, this rant is not for you. Allow me to pitch in my own two cents about myself, Allura, the Paladins, and the comparison referring to Zelda.

Anon, let me just say this first, I adore reading the asks you sent because all of it was basically the biggest problem I had with Allura the second she was revealed in Voltron. And the main reason for that? Was how she introduced herself by being a glaringly-obvious Princess-brat trope that does not think before she decides to speak. This was her first rash and impulsive act as a “royal” Princess.

This is why I have a hard time believing those who say Allura’s racism towards the Galra is valid because, I do not know about you, but being cryogenically frozen during the heat of war then waking up and thinking the main important thing to do is call someone’s ears hideous? What happened to “the war is still fresh in her mind”? And no, suddenly opening up a journal to remember “Oh, yeah, the war! Zarkon evil! I should be angry!” does not fly with me. 

I am not saying her trauma is not real, only her reaction to it is slightly misplaced. 

In any case, let us move on to the comparison of Allura and I being similar to Honerva and Zarkon. Oddly enough, I did not see this clicking at all in the show. Mostly because, in terms of what happened between them story-wise, Allura and I are more like Alfor and Zarkon. And this is just based off their relationship. Maybe I am a man who strives more for platonic relationships in shows aimed towards children, but I really did not feel the romance at all in Lotura. 

Not even with the sickening way she suddenly started pining after me at the realization that I am half-Altean.

And this is the big point in the show. Zarkon and Honerva loved each other not because of their race, but because they just do. Alfor and Zarkon? They both use their power as royals to achieve a greater good. Except, in the case of Allura, she chose to commit unspeakable acts of betrayal based on feelings. Sounds oddly familiar to Alfor, no? Sacrificing all of Altea to ensure she lives? Because he is such a good father, pure of heart who must protect his daughter at the expense of not one, but two entire planets. 

He loves her so much, he sacrificed his own people for her. That is why Allura is more like her father in that aspect. Both rulers let their feelings control their actions. Throughout the entire 8 seasons of Voltron, Allura has constantly gone either completely irrational or completely poised for the public, never in between. She does her self-sacrificing bit way too many times and, when she coincidentally lives afterwards, she puts herself on a pedestal as if she was right in her self-indulgent martyr actions.

Which she most certainly is not, because it is common knowledge that if you want to help people, you should be actively staying alive to do so. It is as though once she believed all “her” people died, she has no real purpose to stay around after her grand plan of eradicating all the “evil” Galra from space gets completed. I am sorry to say, or perhaps not, but she really does remind me of a terrible Mary Sue who can do no wrong. Alive or dead. 

And this shit? Gets brushed aside or ignored by a majority of the Paladins. I will go ahead and blame it that most of them are all very, very young and lack the experience to speak out against those in charge. In fact, the only two who spoke against her in any sense were Shiro and Keith, even Pidge for family reasons. Shiro when he wanted to support putting myself on the throne and Keith? Well, that is a bit more complicated. 

Anyone remember the scene where Keith kept telling Allura that he does not want to hear a lecture from her, and she does it anyways because she is just looking out for Voltron and emotionally guilting him is the best way to go about it? No? Oh, right, maybe it was because she acted like a mother admonishing him for “shirking” his responsibilities. I do not even need to go on about how much I heavily dislike one of the two female members mothering her teammates.

You know what would have been a great development here? If she supported him instead of “disciplining” him as if he stayed out past midnight. Maybe not even support him! Just be like “Okay, I know this is important for you, so tell us what we need to do to help you. We’re a team and as a team we will help you however we can.” 

In this sense, Shiro was trusting Keith and doing the right thing by giving him the space he needed to find himself. Allura, on the other hand, was pushy and ultimately did not care at all for him as a person, but him as a useful Paladin tool. If he was so revered as the Black Paladin, then should she not be, I do not know, following his orders by the T? Or is her role as a royal, Altean Princess whose spirit is connected to Voltron more important?

And even before all this, she believes her and Keith are supposedly buddies now since she gave a half-assed apology for being a racist cunt to him. No one, I guarantee you, no one forgets racist comments, regardless of repaired friendships. Especially when her cold-shoulder and outright blatant ignorance is being seen as “Oh, it’s okay for her to feel like this! What do we know, we’re just humans from Earth who have apparently never read a history book.”

Before I get into the nitty-gritty details about why comparing Zelda and Allura are the same people, let me just say this concerning Allura’s hot-headed temper and unchecked racism involving a relationship with myself. That shit does not work and Allura should have taken the time to sort herself out before mixing in a “loving” relationship with an Altean and Galran man. I am all for equal support in a couple, but she did nothing to support myself as a person because she never saw both sides of my heritage. 

Allura only saw Altean blood and hyperfixated on that alone. Which, do I even need to spell out how terrible it is to judge someone based on their appearance? Based on their race? Whether in a good or bad light, she once again goes from “I will not have some quiznaking Galra on my ship” to “Your mother was Honerva? You’re Altean!” mode. It is fine to be prideful, but she should have already known the dangers of being too prideful of one’s race. 

Considering she is a royal, considering she was raised with political knowledge, considering her father and the Emperor of the Galra Empire worked together, Allura should have been aware of her Achilles Heel and understand her responsibilities. 

Okay, now, Allura being like Zelda? 

Alright, I only played a handful of LoZ games, but even I know that Allura is absolutely nothing like Zelda, even with both of them having the Princess title. 

We already established that Allura is way too rash and irrational when under any duress. Even when shit is not going down, her way of thinking is very straight forward and linear, disregarding the bigger picture as a whole for her own closeted judgements. Allura has even ignored her royal advisor’s advice too many times to count, excusing her reasoning as “It’s the only way, Coran. I must do this.”

Zelda? Zelda does not, at all, follow Allura’s way of thinking. In fact, OoT has a similar plot to Allura and myself. Link skips 7 years of his life, wakes up to Hyrule being controlled by Ganondorf, and the Princess is MIA. Though, if any of you have played the game, then you know that the Princess was actively trying to save the kingdom. Not just Hylians, but Zoras and Gorons as well. 

And the way she accomplished this was by disguising herself as Sheik. Not because she was a coward, but because she knew the importance that came with being a Princess, the next heir to rule, and the one who has the Triforce of Wisdom under her control. Key word here: WISDOM. Something Allura did not display at all in the show. 

If we are comparing Zelda to any character, she is more like the exiled Prince than Allura herself. Both Zelda and myself have the wisdom and first-hand experience of suffering under active war. Both actively saved, or tried to save, those they came across. And both understood the political discourse that hurt everyone, not just one specific race. Everyone.

But if that is the case, then Link would be similar to Allura in the sense that they both woke up to disaster. The big difference between Link and Allura? Link would not have killed Sheik once he revealed himself to be Zelda. Not even because Sheik was being deceiving. Link would understand why Zelda had to hide for her own safety, because she was vital to the plan to restore balance to Hyrule. 

Even if Link was miffed about Zelda not being truthful? He knows that, under no circumstances, can they chance the risk to kill her over his own personal feelings.

“But that doesn’t mean Zelda never curbed her temper!”

In Twilight Princess, when the kingdom was already starting to fall under evil clutches, Zelda teams up with Midna, an exiled Princess of the Twilight world. I can not imagine how helpless Zelda felt in the face of Zant overthrowing the kingdom, but did she go off and leave the citizens to suffer for all of eternity? No. She accepted aid from those who were willing, even the Princess of the other world. 

And, on top of that, Zelda understood that Midna’s world and her own were like two sides of a coin. They must coexist with each other to achieve peace. In fact, I vaguely remember Zelda sacrificing herself to help Midna. Imagine that. Using your powers to help the “enemy” for the greater good. Tell me when Allura helped the Galra out of her own free will? Her own understanding that the Galra need her help just like every other race in the universe?

No, the BoM does not count. Not with her attitude shining through after her “Zarkon is in power because you guys are cowards!” spiel. Not when she begrudgingly helped save Warlord Lahn while simultaneously profiling him out of spite with “Did you buy those weapons or steal them?” And no, not when she built Sincline with myself with the intention to harvest unlimited quintessence then immediately turn around and aid in murdering me, the Emperor of the Galra Empire, over a weak accusation. 

Overall, Allura really is the type of person to barge into other people’s problems, claim “I am here to help you all!”, then throw a hissy fit when people ask for specific aid rather than follow her “My way or the highway” attitude. Terrible writing or not, she was always like this since the very beginning. It is kind of like…she had many chances to improve, but she just made her own situation worse and refused to stop to reflect upon herself.

[rudyskatopianiii]

Breath of the Wild Review (long AF)

So, as the title says, this is a review of the game Breath of the Wild and it is exceedingly long (TLDR at the end). THUS there are going to be some major huge spoilers for the game both lore-wise and gameplay-wise. If spoilers are not in your best interest, GO NO FURTHER THAN THIS CAPS LOCKED SENTANCE! Seriously, I’m going into some major important stuff both in the main story AND in sidequests. You have been warned.

First the review. 3 days before writing this I finished the very amazing game LOZ: Breath of the Wild and I will admit, it was pretty awesome. However, I was recently asked what my final thoughts on the game were and I had to stop and think a pretty long time. I was forced to review all of what I had experienced within this massive game and condense it into a single concise explanation of my overall emotion and thoughts about the staggering 150+ hours I spent in the land of Hyrule. It took some time as I relived every mountain I climbed, every guardian I destroyed, every secret I dug up, and all the various emotions I felt during the entire journey. And then I found an answer. The one thing that could possibly encompass all of the thoughts I had about Breath and the adventure I had been involved in for an entire cumulative 6 and a quarter days. “Meh”.

Now I know that "meh" is not the most glowing of reviews but it was the only thing I could say to completely sum up my entire Breath experiance. But why was the game so meh? Well, when I look back on everything I liked and didn't like, the game is terribly balanced. Everything that brings the score up is countered by something that brings the score right back down. The diverse and varied weapon style and techniques is brought down by the horridly low weapon durability. The characters are well designed but some lack depth and others have so little screentime I didn't feel any emotion for them. Even the main villain and major conflict, though epic in scale and interesting in the story, was little more than a blurry low-res shadowy wallpaper that I forgot it was there half the time. So many good things have been counteracted by bad things that I am left with a truly neutral ruling.

Now lets start with the story. Specifically, the characters. Link is devoid of any memory at the beginning of his adventure and is tasked by Impa to seek out those memories. There are a total of ten memories including the secret one Impa points you to and they are supposed to include all the information you need on all the main characters of the past that you are supposed to care about. But the main problem I have is that it's not enough. Only three out of the ten memories have to do with the other characters other than Zelda and the rest focus solely on Zelda and her relationship with her father and Link. There seem to have been more thought given to the character of Zelda than there is to the other characters who you actually need to save the souls of from the divine beasts. There's no incentive to go through with that as I am not in any way motivated to like or care for those characters. Rivali is a pompous ass, Urbosa is slightly amusing, Daruk is like a drunk uncle, and Mipha is in love with Link. Each of them have very compelling personalities but it is never expanded upon to the point where I want to save them. Even Link in almost all cutscenes is a deadeyed straight faced machine who does what he's told and has no real expression in reaction to things happening around him.

Now the past isn't the only place the game tries to gain your motivation, there is another motive for completing the divine beasts. That is for the sake of the people in immediate danger of their rampage. Nabooris is threatening the Gerudo, Medoh is oppressing the Rito, Ruta is drowning the Zora, and Rudania is attacking the Gorons. So, as a good hero must, you are expected to save those races from the rampaging colossi. However, if I were a first comer to the Zelda series, I wouldn't be that motivated to save these races as I don't really care for much of the characters. The ones you interact with are either super one-dimensional or they are interacted with so shortly you don't have time to get to know them.

Take everyone's favorite at the moment, Prince Sidon. Memes aside, this was the worst case of a missed opportunity in the entire game. Mipha, the Zora champion, is not only the Zora King's daughter, but Sidon's sister as well. A very compelling and intriguing story would've been to have the two of them immediately angry with Link or be an obstacle to the objective to begin with. I mean, losing a family member is the extremely traumatizing and it would make sense for those closest to the deceased to be the most affected. But instead, the King is all too happy to help you, Sidon is all "I believe in you!" right from the very start, and the only obstacle between you and Ruta is some crotchety old Zora who is quickly convinced to help by a set of armor and a memory. Yeah, its cute and unexpected that Mipha's armor is like a Zora wedding ring but that's the most you get in the direction of meaningful connections. In the end there is only one reason to do any of the divine beasts and its just for an easier endgame.

Speaking of endgame, Ganon is also a point that kills the score I gave this game and not just because of the anticlimactic final fight. @blueganon has said this already but I'll add it here because it is so true. Ganon is supposed to be the main villain in this game with the Yiga Clan as his devoted disciples. You'd think after games like Majora's Mask and Ocarina of Time that Nintendo would know how to make a overbearing evil that looms upon you from every angle or goads you forward with each step. But the team missed the mark with this game. Ganon is locked in place as a hazy smoke rolling around Hyrule Castle that is obstructed from view as soon as you go past a mountain and the Yiga clan, though more active after defeating their master, is more a nuisance than an active threat. It is such a passive thing that you could easily forget that there is even a Ganon at all. The final fight is depressingly simple as well. The first round is actually pretty active and very well designed (see my theory post coming after this) and incorporates all the techniques and equipment you've been collecting on your adventure. But then the fight devolves into a shoot-the-weak-point generic 3D Zelda boss that this game had done so well trying to avoid.

Even the side quests are shallow and not that fun to do. They're either a "get this thing(s) and bring it here" quest or a "kill this thing(s)" quest with few deviating from that formula and they all have either common or uncommon rewards that are easily found in abundance in the overworld. The only quest that even comes close to being worth the chore is the Tarrey Town questline where you build an entire settlement and populate it with people from all over the map. But even that is comprised of multiple fetch quests. I mean, I know they're just side quests and those characters don't really matter in the grand scheme of things but Majora's Mask is chocked full of side quests that are not tied to the main objective but the majority of which have memorable characters with great stories spanning before, during, and after their completion. It's that attention to detail and good storytelling that give the world its own voice and each and every NPC their own special place in not just your memory but your heart (god what a cliché...).

Then there's the music. The game has only 3 memorable pieces in it (at least for me), the song that plays at Rito Village, the song at Tarrey Town, and the final assault orchestration that plays at Hyrule Castle. Rito Village is the melody on Dragon Roost Island from Wing Waker but much more mellow, Tarrey Town is an amazing melding of each theme across Hyrule and is a real calming melody, and Hyrule Castle's music really does feel like a final assault with its epic orchestra and the weaving of Ganon's theme and Zelda's lullaby together along with an original theme for the Castle itself is so fulfilling especially when your there to finish the game. But that's it. Other than some of the mini-boss themes like fighting a Hinox or Molduga, which are good but... fleeting to put it mildly, there are no other really memorable melodies or compositions even for the overworld witch is eerily silent except for the once in a while piano piece that only serves as ambiance. Even Kass' song, though very recognizable and a great example of good open world design, is just a loop that gets old pretty quickly. The final boss' theme was so forgettable that even a few days after completing the game I've already forgotten it. That. Is. Not. Good. My last thoughts on the game should not be "welp... that's done".

There was just so much missed potential in this game that could've made it so much better. And it's those multiple shortcomings that are ultimately holding it back. I want to be exceedingly enthusiastic about the game. I want to give it a perfect score. Hell, I WANT to be excited about every part of this game. But I just can't. And it kills me that I can't have it on that level of esteem.

TLDR: Breath of the Wild counters itself so well its just an "ok" game. Ganondorf theory post coming soon.