#(<- is it finals week for you guys too)
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Soup solves everything.
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#Senshi#izutsumi#chilchuck tims#laios touden#marcille donato#THE SOUP CHAPTER HAS BEEN ANIMATED#I have so many thoughts about senshi's backstory and how much that experience has shaped who he is.#This is such a powerful moment because it makes it clear how *stuck* senshi has been because of his trauma.#Up until now he has been a mystery! He's the chef guy! Don't worry about his apparent reclusiveness from society!#Don't worry about his intense need to make sure 'the young ones are fed'!#Senshi still has a lot of healing but this was the moment he could finally forgive himself.#This chapter is so important to me because sometimes you truly do need to face the most terrifying things to move past them.#This joke here is a bit too narrow to be funny for the masses...but mdzs fans know.#MDZS :handshake: Dungeon Meshi: Soup moment.#Laios and Jiang Yanli have a powerful magic call "Eat some soup and maybe you'll feel better'#That is also a spell you can cast upon yourself. Go eat some soup and you will feel better. Merry Soupmas everyone.#One more week of Thistle Thursdays....I'm not ready to say goodbye B*(
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“You’re a caveman. And I’ve invented fire.”
Close-ups under the cut :)
#I've had this idea since May and I've finally finished it#Did the sketch after watching SAD for the second time#I watched the end of One Step Ahead when the camera closes in on Curt and Joey's finger guns and Curt was kneeling#and I was struck violently and urgently with this idea#And then I proceeded to put it off for a million years up until last week when I picked it back up#I'm very proud of this one and I hope you guys like it as much as I do#I really love doing painting parodies and this one worked just too well#Anyways yeah- spent almost 12 hours on this piece so that's fun- time to go draw more!#Fun fact: Former US President Andrew Jackson was a flat earther#yikes#Spies are forever#SAF#Spies are forever fanart#SAF TCB#Tin Can Brothers#Tin Can Bros#tin can bros fanart#Curt Mega#Agent Curt Mega#Owen Carvour#Joey Richter#the creation of adam#The creation of adam parody#My art
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Finarfin Fades.
No one expects it, no one’s faded in Valinor since Miriel. The War of Wrath is won and he comes back, waving off the courtiers, well wishers, and congratulators with his usual grace, and walks into the palace of Tirion. To rooms abandoned since their owners left so long ago. Winding deeper and deeper his feet take him to what was once Finwë’s favourite garden.
He’s so tired.
He’s fulfilled his promise to Fëanaro and Nolofinwë, to avenge them. To make the agony of their final moments - agony Finarfin felt, falling to the floor screaming as fire and darkness consumed his spirit - count for something. Now Morgoth is finally gone, but he’s not the only one.
His brothers, larger than life, larger than death, are gone. With them his sons. Niece. Nephews. Grandchildren. His daughter is never to return. He Saw little Nelyo’s death in his dreams and is sure hopes for the child’s own sake that Makalaurë will be close behind.
Little remains. Even less on these golden shores.
So Finarfin sits on a bench long overgrown with vines and weeds, and watches the sun filter through the thicket, wishing the ghosts he sees in his father’s garden would flesh out.
He sits. He waits.
And by the time anyone finds him, it’s too late.
…at least he’s smiling again.
#au i guess#Every so often I’m hit with Finarfin feels#and it *hurts*#we love Finarfin in this house#my poor guy deserved better#I know Finrod is reembodied but let’s say it would’ve happened after the war#the Valar didn’t expect this though#and they can’t make it better#Finarfin’s lost too much and he’s tired#tired like his half-brother’s mother#and they know he won’t return until his brothers are let out#maybe that’s what finally convinced them to let out Fëanor and Fingolfin#they’re waiting in the Halls btw#the whole fam is#they’re proud#and Arafinwë finally gets some rest#Finarfin#Arafinwë#war of wrath#fëanor#fingolfin#they’re haunting this whole thing#you can decide where Eärwen is in all this#I usually hc her as having stayed with her husband but maybe she leaves in this one#or maybe she’s gone for a few weeks trying to settle the new arrivals before heading back#not my best work but alas#midnight writings yanno#silmarillion#ITHOF Writes
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Nico and Percy's dynamic through the series is eternally funny to me, because it's just. like.
Percy's having a constant mental struggle between his fatal flaw of loyalty with a promise he made to Bianca to protect Nico, versus his Big 3 kid desire to maim other Big 3 kids / Poseidon descendant urge to totally maim Nico specifically. He hates Nico so so much. He thinks Nico's annoying and weird at best, and creepy/sketchy when he's older. The only positive thoughts Percy has towards Nico are "He's Bianca's brother and Bianca was my friend and I owe her/He's Hazel's brother and Hazel is my friend and would kill me if I was mean to him," "He's a powerful asset and useful ally (if questionable)," and "He's kinda pathetic and I feel maybe a little bad about it." Percy has multiple occasions throughout the series where he strongly considers - and on one occasionally actually goes through with - throttling Nico.
Meanwhile, Nico is following around Percy like a lost puppy. He explicitly can never bring himself to even dislike anything about Percy no matter how hard he tries. He has a whole bit in BoO where he's mentally going "UGH he's so stupid BUT IT'S ENDEARING HOW DARE HE." He's totally smitten. He's making deals with his dad for Percy. He's making convoluted plans to help Percy stand a chance against Kronos. During the entirety of BoTL it's like he's playing tsundere - "I'm helping NOT PERCY SPECIFICALLY with this quest! Me helping Percy would be SILLY because I DEFINITELY HATE HIM." Then he proceeds to show up to Percy's birthday party to basically ask him on a weird date and spend the entire next book scrambling around trying to help him or protect him or impress him. And Percy could not give less of a shit.
Just. That dynamic is so funny to me. Percy is the founder of the Nico Protection Club in that he's the one they're all protecting Nico from and meanwhile Nico is throwing himself at Percy to the point where the literal god of gay love calls him out on it.
#pjo#percy jackson#nico di angelo#Percy shows up at CJ and squints at Nico like ''hm. why do i feel like i hate you? like i just wanna punch you in the face?''#and Nico just immediately goes ''huh no idea anyways i have to go-'' and jumps into Tartarus#but not before he gives Hazel essentially a detailed explanation of ''this is Percy i cant say much but please dont let him die <3''#and Nico's whole Tartarus trip was basically a whole ''im doing this so no one else has to''#only for Percy and Annabeth to fall in like one book later and Nico proceeds to spend the next book internally screaming about it#and then Cupid calls him out on it and the next book#Nico's just like ''at this point im hoping i keel over within the next week just so i can force this dumb crush to chill the fuck out''#Nico staring pointedly at Will: ''For my own sake i need to form another crush RIGHT NOW so i can finally get over Percy.''#''this has been so bad for my health''#Nico's crush on Percy is just too funny to me. horrible pick my guy. terrible job. love that for you. he could not be less interested.#Percy LITERALLY TRIES TO KILL NICO and ditch him in the underworld and Nico is somehow STILL like ''but i love him''#Percy basically chokes him. beats up his dad. tells him ''go get smited by your dad for me.'' and ditches him.#and Nico's opinions/crush on him DO NOT CHANGE#though also Nico's reaction to Percy beating up his dad + skeletons is SO funny. his jaw is on the floor. he's flustered about it.#he just witnessed Percy be incredibly hot and proceeded to go ''yea i'll do anything for this man. collect reinforcements of 3 gods? sure''#nico you absolute DISASTER with HORRIBLE TASTE. you can do better. raise your standards.#which tbh is funnier when you factor in sun and the star. Nico just wont stop crushing on guys who dislike him and everything he stands for
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HEY!!! i finally got out of my art block and ended up switching to a drawing tablet instead of my phone! i have one pretty big thing being worked on currently, but here's some lamb to hold you over for a few days ^^
#cult of the lamb#cotl#my art#cotl lamb#cryptidyapsesh#IM BACK FINALLY!!!#so excited i have so many drafts of mini comics and art to do this next week and so on#gonna put this out there that my style is all over the place currently so#every other post is gonna look a little different until i end up settling on something!#im super behind on art fight too cuz of this block wahh#so i MIGHT end up getting some attacks done before im back to regular cotl stuff#cult of the lamb fanart#thank you to the people who stuck around!!!! you guys are awesome sauce#artists on tumblr#if anyones curious i got the Q6 ugee tablet!! its pretty cheap compared to other drawing tablets ive gotten in the past#definitely recommend
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I've had this pose ref saved for a while and the Superman set photos just gave off the same energy 👉🏻👈🏻
The reference is this photo of Katharine Hepburn as Antiope and Colin Keith-Johnston as Theseus in the 1932 play 'The Warrior's Husband' (and I'd love for people to turn into a draw your otp meme pls pls pls this pose is so good)
And also, of course, the Superman (2025) set photos
#superfamilyweek#superman#dcu#clois#lois lane#clark kent#i was actually gonna post this a few days ago but then i found out about the superfamily week#it wasn't made for it but i hope you can accept this humble offering even if it doesn't really fit the prompts#art#digital#fanart#live-action#dc#regular#final#colour#this actually from june when the set photos came out and i just got completely obsessed and went into a clois haze#it all looks so good though!! the whole thing!!!! i'm vibrating with excitement just thinking about it!!!!!!!#if this film isn't good i'm gonna be sooo disappointed you guys have no idea how much i'm looking forward to it#but anyway. ART RAMBLES: as i mentioned on the tags of my last drawing this piece gave me SUCH a headache#i think it's probably cos it was just supposed to be a quick sketch so i used a more stable pencil brush#but then i really liked it so i decided to properly colour it instead of just doing the watercolour thing i usually do for sketches#but with finished pieces i like the lineart to be kinda messy and the sketch to even show through bit#and since i used the more stable brush for the sketch it ended up looking WAY too clean. not like my stuff at all.#so i just started throwing stuff at the wall to see what could make it more interesting. full background! actual lineart! texture layers!#and this here is what i was the happiest with. i don't... love it though. it should be looking way more interesting given the pose#and then i also did the purge girl halfway through this and it looked SO good right out of the bat (pun intended)#so i went a bit into a spiral. did some realistic stuff i'll post soon. and now am trying out a thick black lineart style.#(i'll definitely still use the coloured lines for the sketchy watercolour stuff though. it just looks way too cute)
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I wish the thieves had SOME kind of reaction to the Satanael awakening. Kinda wish we at least had RYUJI react to it….
I think its sooooo compelling to have Ryuji be the only person to witness BOTH awakenings; to see how much Akira and his will has grown since they first met. There was a raw, burning fury in Akiras core that recoiled at the injustice before him, and when given the tools to punish said injustice, eagerly accepted it with a wild, almost manic kind of intensity. I think it would be difficult for the others to truly grasp just how scary that was; that for a short moment, Ryuji couldnt pinpoint the cause of that rage, and the target of it. Akiras mellowed out alot since then, but its always in the back of Ryujis head; theres a side of their leader literally none of the thieves have or will ever see, and he doesnt really know how hes supposed to feel about that.
And now the airs charged in the same way he felt back in Kamoshidas palace; right as Akiras eyes widened at seeing him slammed against the wall. The blazing, untamed ferocity in his eyes from back then is replaced with a cool, calm, steely conviction. He knows his purpose; understands completely what his will screamed at him to understand back when it first started. This is the Akira the team knows, and its definitely the one Ryuji is used to now, but its insane to see the shift; insane to see the kind of power that simmered in Akiras core, literally too big and too overwhelming for past Akira to grapple with and set free.
Satanael comes down, and theres a moment, through all the excited screaming and hollering, where Ryuji can see it look right at him, and Ryuji is taken back to the floor of Kamoshidas Palace; not to the fear he felt when Arsene came forth incinerating everything, but immediately after, when Akira comes to with wide eyes and an outstretched hand- that bizarre feeling of safety, of knowing that this kid would have his back, and that hed never have to worry about where his place would be (its right beside him, obviously.)
#chattin#long post#pegoryu#OUGH#just thinking about Satanael leaning down to get at face level w everyone after the fight#and hes like#‘its been a pleasure to finally see you in person; chariot’#and ryujis like. finally?? HUH. *chuckles nervously* What Does That Mean.#like obv it is based off of hcs n shit but i like the idea that Satanael TRIED to awaken; like he was so EAGER to get out#and Akira was too new and still too scared to accept that (without realizing it)#so arsene is what manifested instead#like#akiras will reacted SO strongly to ryuji getting cornered that he almost skipped a stage#and satanael SAW the object of his (almost) awakening#hed be happy to see the guy who gave the trickster the strength to go through w awakening#and ryuji would be like im. sorry… but i think. i would remember. um. someone that uh. big.#hed be so flustered. like man. not again. i went through ONE awakening and took weeks to be normal again.#do i really have to go through it again? really? really ????????#anyway. rambling#ryuji was a disaster through BOTH of akiras awakenings. hes relentlessly teased about it forever
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SHOP OPENS TOMORROW APRIL 21st (2024)
brand new items will be up for preorder, and previous charms are coming back for preorders again!! I’ve been working on this shop update for about two months, i hope everyone enjoys!
mothcharm.com
#I lost my tumblr login for a bit but ive been too busy to worry about it ahaha;;#i have so many things on my plate + tons of irl issues but finally… i get a week to rest before going back to client work… o)-(#i hope you guys will like everything 🥹#shop#shop opening#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#cookie run ovenbreak#cookie run fanart#moonlight cookie#shadow milk cookie#pokemiku#hatsune miku#project voltage#astrelle#mothcharm
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ooooh! Could you do something for Elliott from Stardew Valley? Or perhaps Mr. Qi? Elliott’s my favourite character, but Mr. Qi has that “omnipotent stalker with a weird sense of humour” vibe that would fit perfectly.
Thanks in advance!
Ooh, okay! As much as I think Mr. Qi is the most likely out of everyone in the cast to become a yandere, I can't help but that I just wanna cuddle a delusional yandere Eliott. Thanks for the Ask btw!
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Anon Yan 💌‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
Yandere Elliott
I feel like Elliott is the delusional stalker type.
Like when he and the farmer (aka you) first meet it's love at first sight for him.
He's been in a creative rut for so long, bored out of his mind and replaying the same words over and over again in his mind.
He heard about the new farmer coming into town from Leah, and thought nothing of it really. It wouldn't effect him and his work.
Oh how wrong he was. From the moment Elliott met you the man became a simp.
He watched you run around town foraging for anything good to sell, he always admired how keen your eye was for the little berries that'd grow in the bushes and the flowers nobody thought to pick.
He looks at you like you hung the stars and the moon in the sky. Like you've moved the heavens and the earth to make space just for him and his little whimsical fantasies. And in a sense you kinda did.
After all, it was you who brought him out of the bored gloom he'd had been living in for the past months.
So it'd only make sense that you'd become his one and only muse.
The man could write thousands of sonnets and haiku's in your name. He hasn't gotten that far yet, but he's getting closer everyday.
He's sickly sweet, that lovey-dovey puppy-dog expression crosses his face whenever he so much as thinks about you. [Which is all the time btw]
He is totally and completely enamored with you, fallen for you like a fish falls for the bait. Which is unfortunate for him as you don't seem to have fallen for him.
But it's fine! Maybe you're just shy, that's okay, he'll just need to be a little more forceful in his affections.
"Darling! There you are. I have been looking all over for you. Come along now, I have made another poem for you to read. It'll be wonderful."
Which doesn't work...in fact it seems to make you even more reserved.
But thats okay to! You guys will work on that together.
He just keeps on pushing and pushing and pushing, and it never seems to stop.
It isn't until you blow up on him, calling him a creep, that he backs off. But only for a little bit.
He see's this as just a small argument between you guys, it'll pass over in a few days once you cool down.
But then he see's you talking to Sebastion in the saloon. You twirling your hair between your fingers, laughing at his jokes, blushing when he gets a little too close for comfort, and looking up at him with sweetest expression he's ever seen from you.
For the first time in a long time, Elliott feels rage. And not the normal kind, oh no no no, I mean blinding rage.
The kind that makes you act on your violent thoughts. Which is exactly what Elliott ended up doing.
In a flash he's on Sebastion, beating the poor boy within an inch of his life.
The other people at the Saloon try to stop the raging Elloitt, but all of the get knocked on their ass and get to scared to do anything.
Once Elliott was done with Sebastion, he turned to look at you. No longer did he look at with that sweet puppy-dog face, no instead his eyes were filled with nothing but apathy as he grabbed your chin with his bloody thumb and directed you to look at the dead body of your best friend.
"Look at what you've caused dear. This is what happens when you try to make me jealous."
#FINALLY!#THIS TOOK WAY TOO LONG I'M SORRY Y'ALL.#Finals are next week so the past couple weeks have just been me focused on that.#But anyway thanks for reading you guys!#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere boyfriend#sdv elliot x reader#Sdv Yandere Elliot x Reader#sdv elliott#Sdv yandere elliot#Sdv#yandere scenarios#yandere headcanons#Delusional Yandere#anon-yan writings 💌‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
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Everyone Introduced in Dimension 20's Fantasy High: Junior Year episode 17
#dimension 20 spoilers#dimension 20#d20 introductions#fhjy#fantasy high junior year#d20 fhjy#MAN what a ride#almost missed that ruben had a new intro card variant too. god bless the transcript search#that large ankarna was art scrolling on screen that i couldn't get in one go‚ so i put a few screencaps together to make that one#of which you can definitely see the lines of because it was actively glowing and moving which was VERY cool but hard to catch smoothly#i think if cait may posts the full Clean shot of ankarna themself i'll reblog that one too for posterity#(this one is also very off center because i had a corner of blank left over because i had to shift one of them to the side#because she was moved just a little bit to the side too#also MANNNNN that scene with bucky and kristen that was so sweet...... i'm really glad she's finally got the time to talk with him#he really needed it#GORGEOUS art this episode..... and oh god this next one is going to have me SO stressed#A BLUE DRAGON ATTACKING THE SHIP?? ALL THE VOTES NEEDING TO BE AT THE SCHOOL BY MIDNIGHT?????#lord HELP me#things are not going to go well i can feel it.#also sad that oisin might turn out to be a Very Not Good guy after all 😭#listen a dragonborn enjoyer can dream#also INSANE. INSANE THAT THE BAD GUY THIS WHOLE TIME WAS#i shan't say. but good GOD i can't believe it#shout out to notoriousmasc who got it right away like WEEKS ago
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I thought Will would like messing with louise sometimes. Louise doesnt seem to like his sense of humor, though.
(Characters are will and louise from @peachnewt 's story, getting in deep !!)
#okay so im gonna say this in the tags cause im too much of a pussy to say it for real#but ive never interacted with any vore communities before#mostly because ive always felt like it was too “weird”. also ive just never found any i was really felt comfortable with#but recently (after literal years of figuring myself out and feeling like i was crazy) ive realised i do actually want to talk to you guys#it probably sounds dumb but finding GID and actually exploring a bit of the community here has shown me#that there ARE people like me. with the same experiences and feelings.#after spending my whole life feeling like a freak. finally meeting people who are just like me#okay that really does sound cringe but you know what i mean right?#idk. ive felt more seen and “normal” about myself in the last week than i have in forever#and i guess i just hope you guys can show me around the place and talk to me about the things that have been stuck in my head for forever#finding this insanely niche community of “nonsexual comfort safe vore” or whatever other terms can be used#has seriously changed a lot for me#and i cant wait to talk to all of you more \:]#gid fanart#will and louise gid
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interesting tidbits from the trailer and my probably wrong interpretation of them
zavala is shown (?) the traveler leaving the percussor planet here i think.
see a bit later:
comparing to the season of the deep cutscene:
maybe the witness is showing zavala how the traveler left it (playing on zavala's fears, like when he began questioning the traveler for supposedly giving the hive the light back in witch queen)??? not sure
then it seems like he is in the same place where he meets veiled lady:
with cayde saying "you said it spoke to you?" as in the witness, right? the witness showed him the traveler leaving, then showed him... this?
so the million dollar question is: who is this?
idk but
veiled lady holding a shard of glass (???? im not sure what that is) right after the traveler leaves the precursor planet? smells like first knife to me!
no really. kind of.
especially because we get this later:
aka tons of veiled ladies dying/going puff. which makes it seem like veiled lady might be a representation of the precursors? like, they are all melting into smoke bc they united to become the witness. and the witness is asking zavala to join them/it. it also sounds like one of the veiled ladies is the one who whispers "suffering" to zavala, sooooo
i do feel like the first knife bit might be a stretch buuuut back in season of the deep (cutscene) we were told the precursors desired a "winnower to shape the garden". veiled lady with shard of glass might just be indicating that the precursors wanted to influence the traveler, which caused it to nope the fuck out and eventually led to the witness forming itself. idk.
it might be the ffxiv fan in me, but veiled lady representing the precursors sounds reasonable bc the precursors stripped themselves of individuality (literally!), as in, without faces, recognizable characteristics, etc, with the precursor faction (penitent, i think?) that led the idea of "cutting off" unwanted aspects of the precursor race, everyone becoming one aka the witness, with one single objective and motivation, blah blah blah. it is implied (both in the vidoc and in game, imo) that they didn't succeed in cutting off said unwanted aspects, tho (which is one of the reasons veiled lady whispering stuff to zavala sounds so fucking angry i guess). not all of the veiled ladies/precursors who are contained within the witness are happy about it, is the thing
(also the witness seems to be in front of the veil at this point, which imo just makes it more likely that veiled lady = precursors + quite literally the power of the veil, AS IN VEILED PRECURSORS)
but who knows!!! certainly not me
#also. crow and cayde are together a lot in that trailer and it spooks me bc it reeks of crow sacrificing himself for cayde at some point#IDK I HOPE NOT#really hope the pale heart is initially like crow cayde and guardian's road trip tho#destiny 2#the final shape#spoilers#the final shape spoilers#THIS WILL BE THE LONGEST WEEK EVERRRRRRRRRRRR#ren.txt#the shot of the traveler leaving the precursor planet reminds me (ofc) of the traveler 'leaving' the last city#which IS the string the witness is trying to pull in zavala#as in 'see it did it to us too it fucking sucked. are you really going to trust this guy???'
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rook be upon ye
#so. this is suri. my meerkat veiljumper#dragon age the veilguard#rook#look ive had A WEEK (positive)#first i got swept away to a llama ranch (!!!!) for a halloween weekend#it was. so so great#got to eat freshly hunted deer meat? a first. i wasn't a fan lmao#and then on sunday my brother came by with his sons gaming laptop with a copy of veilguard installed on it so I could play offline 😭 y'all.#my heart 🥹#today im going to light candles at the graveyard so thats. emotionally charged#but i cannot tell you how extatic i am to get to play da to unwind at night. fucking sobbing.#next week fiber guys are comins and i get real internet and then a desk with outlets and then a pc and then i can work on ouro again AUUUGH#fitting the final piece of a puzzle feeling.exe#im updating you patreons more tomorrow too. heuehshaushdhdjdidudmz i feel so good. so hopeful#this halloween has been so great. and look at suri! love of my life. i don't even care that veilguard has been. yk. /like that/.#when i tell you the SOUNDS that came out of me when solas talks. being mr. sarcasm#varrics take on his character. AUGHH#bliss.#obviously it wasn't sunday my brother came LMAO. i can't remember the day but when da released 💀 BYE
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.
#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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Hey guys,,,,guess whos not dead?!
Teen Dad Logan :)
Or, I suppose more accurately, Young Dad Logan. And by adjacency, Uncle Dad Victor.
This turned out to be one of my largest pieces of writing ever Bee-Tee-Dubs so its going to be under this to not Kill You All:
So in this AU they meet when they're 10 and 11, Jimmy just out of foster care after they found out he's a mutant, and Vic a few weeks after murdering his Father.
At first, it's honestly Jimmy showing Victor a lot of things. Simple things, like how to forage and how to scent, but it's all...quiet. Jimmy already carries a sense of shame for his ferocity that Vic never enjoys. So he draws the kid into fights, helps him laugh until his face is red with laughter instead of shame. He learns about him, and in turn Jimmy learns about him. Happy enough kids until things turned south. One was locked up and the other ran away. They escaped and found each other. It was meant to be.
Victor gives him his new name. Jimmy hasn't felt like His in a long time and the first time Vic calls him Logan, he beams.
Vic still calls him Jimmy when he's scared, but it's their little secret.
Anyways, they stay rough and tumble until The developers in the Weapon X project find them, aged 14 and 15 respectively. It's Victor's idea that they stay. Logan, for all his desires to settle down, feels chafed by the military, but Vic sees through that, see's what they could be, in the future. See's him and his Runt living free after serving, what's a few years as lab rats if they get all their adult life? What's being looked at like a monster when he's allowed to be a monster and still get schooling? Logan doesn't think any of these things, but when Vic nods, he does too.
They're only allowed to be together for the first three months, and then their forced apart, to 'reduce codependency'. They last two years without each other, and when they're reunited...things are different.
Creed has grown into his role, with each murder proving that his dad wasn't special, he's always been meant for this, how dare Anyone Try to stop him. He's become an Animal. Sabretooth.
And Wolverine....is Wolverine now. But doesn't take long before Vic realizes somethings wrong. Wolverine glances at him, but there's no glint of recognition in his eyes. As Creed starts to question him, he thinks it's a clone. So he Kills It.
Its only the third time Logan revives and puts his claws through Creeds chest that Creed realizes it's his runt. Still, being forgotten stings, being ignored stings worse, and there's a lot more blood shed before the guards are able to separate the two.
Safe to say they butt heads a lot more. Vic goads him often, word for word the way he used to, and like a house of cards, Wolverine always folds. The only times he seems to come back to himself for a moment, are the moments after Creed's killed him, and he's just waking up. He'll get a look on his face, one Vic recognizes. He's seen it a hundred of times before, even if the runt always tried to hide it:
Fear. Exhaustion.
They never talk. Victor pets his hair as Logan's throat is rapidly sewing itself back together, or Logan rumbling under Vic's body as his puncture wounds close. In those moments, Logan Remembers.
...
It all starts to fall apart when one Logan Howlett, at the fresh age of 18, is chosen to become Weapon X.
Creed sees red. This was HIS goal, His to earn, that stupid brat doesn't even want to be here, Logan doesn't even remember why he's-
He doesn't even remember why he came here in the first place.
But Sabretooth is smart. He figures out when, and where, they're going to do the operation. And obviously, he bursts in.
As he does, he overhears a Commander noting that they should 'wipe wolverines mind clean one last time, to make sure he's only obedient to them.
And that is First Strike.
Victor lashes out, taking down a doctor and a guard before anyone can blink. But his noise distracts the surgeons and other doctors carefully monitoring The Wolverine's Adamantium intake, and one of them nudges their controls in their scramble to get away, pushing significantly more onto his skeleton than originally planned.
Victor stops when he hears screaming.
Logan hears....nothing. He knows the procedure is going to begin, but he doesn't know when. When the burning starts, he goes to that little place in his head he pretends he doesn't have. He sees flashes of Creed's face, snarling and smiling, and he feels...safe. He sees white, and red hair and...hears yelling. His eyes open, and immediately close as salt water rushes into them. He breathes unsteadily through his
The water stops draining but the burning doesn't stop. Worse, his head feels like it's being torn apart, a feeling he remembers but can't name. And suddenly, nothing matters because,
Sabretooth is calling him Jimmy and why why WHY DOES EVERYTHING HURT OW OW OW OW OW OW Victor help please please plEASE PLEASE VICTOR VIC-
...
Safe to say the adamantium causes even more psychological damage to them.
There is one single benefit: The Memory Adjustment failed. In fact, it failed so bad that Creed, for three whole days, get's Logan to himself.
They don't do much. Logan wakes up and launches himself at Vic, legs collapsing as his ligaments struggle to accustom themselves to the weight of his new bones. He's in constant pain, mostly just looking at Vic with big, sad brown eyes until he lies back down with him on the shitty Hospital ordered bed. It creaks under them, but thankfully never gives.
When they do talk, they don't talk about the memories. About Wolverine gutting Sabretooth to prove a point, about Sabretooth biting out his spinal chord, about Wolverine ripping out his teeth in claws. None of it matters. They know it can't last. Creed didn't plan, and Logan is too weak to think, not that he does much of that in the first place.
After those days of clarity post operation, Logan is wiped clean. And for the next year, it's back to normal. For Wolverine at least.
But of course, Logan has to beat him to the punch. Literally.
Around a month after the one year anniversary of his Surgery, Wolverine comes Bursting through the training rooms, with twenty guards hot on his trail. Sabretooth, a Predator, Obviously follows. Logan runs and runs and runs, and eventually rips the door of a particular room, to reveal...
an eerily large room filled with tubes. There's wires and things being suspended in liquid, and at first, Victor can't comprehend what he's looking at. By the time he reads 'X-02', Doner Wolverine, Logan's already broken three of the tubes with his claws, uncaring of the thick glass cutting him open in retribution for being shattered.
people go flying, and as they hit equipment the room itself begins to collapse, separating Sabretooth from Wolverine. Wolverine continues through the rooms, ensuring that there's nothing deeper inside that can help them make more of him. He has enough nightmares. Sabretooth stays back to help finish the job. All those tubes don't destroy themselves, you know?
He finds a room full of his samples, and a woman in a chair. A woman with a bullet in her neck instead of her head. Poor thing had probably gotten caught in between him and the guards. But why was she just sitting-
The woman has a baby in her arms, tubes still attached. He growls for a moment, moving to finishes her off, but freezes when she and she's groans.
"Laura...Laura..."
Logan looks at her little beady eyes, mousy brown hair, and knows...she's his.
Before he's even thought about it she's cradled in his arms, evidently all wrong because she starts to wail and Vic skids in, shoulder denting the doorframe as he stops and stares at the scene in front of him.
The woman gives one final shudder, and her head lulls. Dead.
Still, there's no time to think. Victor hears thuds getting closer to the room, and as he looks to his right he realizes there's only one way out. The window. Oh well.
with a swear, he lifts Logan by the back of his jacket and gives him a shove, and his back goes strait through the paneling and out of the fourth story. Victor whoops, and follows him down. By the time he's already made his much more elegant landing, Logan is groaning and cussing him out as much as his winded lungs will let him, which is a surprising amount. Still, Vic scruffs him again and sets him on his feet, and nods in the direction of the woods.
"Lets go"
And they do.
They end up being surrounded by the X-Men somewhere in Maine and are "Invited" to Stay at Xavier's school. Logan decides for them this time. A house, a promise that the government will be dealt with for them, and that he can get all of his memories back are very good motivators. And they an finish their education.
Victor actually...enjoys classes. He likes being smart, and it's easy. Logan does Charter school. He had lasted exactly a week in public education before deciding that if he had to deal with one more idiotic comment from one of those stupid fucking kids he was going to-
Well. His words were Not Child Friendly, so he made sure to cover his kid's ears. Besides, he's bonded with fellow teen Rogue and preteen Jubilee and Kitty (his daughters) like little sisters, but he never really settles unless he's with his Kid. His Laura.
He had to fight to keep her, a young unstable mutant like him was not the ideal parent, but for the first two months, she sobbed if anyone else held her, terrible screeches, and would reach for him to the point of falling out of peoples arms. And, he had imprinted on her to. He swore he could tell when she was happy or uncomfortable before she could, would burp her or flip her back onto her back before she got fed up with tummy time.
Vic is Terrified of touching her but refuses to admit it. He carefully runs his finger down her pudgy little cheek, in awe of her soft skin against his knuckle, when she moves suddenly, and she attempts to nuzzle her way into his palm. He, obligingly, opens his hand. When one of his claws scrapes her hair, he freezes, waiting for her to cry out. Instead, she burbles happily, honey brown eyes giving him long, slow blinks.
She likes his head scratches the best.
Logan sometimes falls asleep with her on his stomach on the couch, leaving Victor to carry him AND his clingy baby back to bed, the crib next to them so Laura can still grab onto Logans finger. They sleep together now, in a nest of blankets and pillows, Logans hand always off the bed but still somehow still touching Vic, as if to make sure he's still there.
Their codependency is back full swing, and the only time they can be reliably separated is when Vic goes to school, because he goes with Scotty, and the Boy Scout would never let anything happen to another mutant, even if that mutant makes him want to shoot him with his laser-beam full power just to see what would happen.
Thankfully, because of Victors presence, the Mind Adjustment does actually work, but it leaves Logan questioning his parallel memories for years. In the process they realize that...Victors memories have been tampered with too.
But that, is a story for another time.
#did#did you guys notice my Dead Name parallels at the beginning. And also my Brain Exploding this took TWO WEEKS to finalize i hope yall r happ#holy CRAP#anyways tags#blorboblurbs#wolverine#logan howlett#fanfic ideas#logan#fanfic#x men#victor creed#sabretooth#sabertooth#x 23#also guys!!! peep the changing of Names!!!! this is (almost always) on purpose!!!!! : D#also i do not want this to seem Sabretooth bashy as like the Bad Guy that Forced Logan to be like this#this is just mostly? from Creeds perspective in my head#whith only quick shots from Logans#so its more blamey than the situation really is.#In reality#Logan has always had a lot of independance#and knows how to make his own decisions and he CHOSE to go because he ALSO saw things that Weapon X could do for him. Not the same ones#but similar#what i mean to say is that they are two closely intertwinded little guys who may or may not be codependant an therefore in Love <3#but also that they are independant people who are intelegant in separate ways. Victor thinks too hard sometimes#he's tricky and likes to plan. Logan thinks in the moment#and knows that things are ever shifting. why plan when you can hit Real Hard
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could it be .. ? it is !! HAPPY OCTOBER FRIENDZ ! the start of the month is always so exciting and i hope it brings you all love & comfort & everything you desire ! giving an extra dose of luck to all my writer friendz for this month ! may your kinktober / fics be great ! let’s all do our best this month and fill it with silly spooky vibes ! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ෆ
#(link is to a silly tiktok)#FINALLY !!!!#i feel awakened#september has ended and october begins#and i feel so much lighter.#i did meal prepping on sunday which i haven’t done in … far too long. so i feel like im breaking out of the funk yipeeeee !!!#anywhosies !#the fairy wings stay ON all month. no expectations. going to spread some magic in inboxes throughout the month bc ive been slacking !!!#and i miss yapping with u guys :’)#i’m workin on a few of my fics for kinktober and hoping by the end of the week i have the majority doneeee ^_^#and i have a couple surprises scattered around teehee#would add onto the kinktober list but !! it would mess up the vibes of the 8 phases#GASP. unless i did a section for eclipses (extras) omg … much 2 think about.#alright enough outta me !!! have a wonderful day !!! i hope you find something to smile at !!! iluuuu !!!!#₊˚⊹ ᰔ xoxo aims#ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞ — ✩ daily yap.
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