#(<- guy who says thatt every day)

[dreamdripdistance]

what if i just quit my job :)

[moonsquaremars]

11th house thoughts

Hi everybody.

I have an 11th house stellium, and I love it. Probably because my venus is in there, der planet of luv, as well as mars, lust et aggression, and mercury, th’ intellect. 

My sun missed it shy of 1° ; had i been born just a few minutes earlier, I would have been an 11th house sun. But I’m a twelfer. Why, might you ask? My mother has an 11th house stellium afterall, so did my ex-boyfriend. Well, if you ask, my father is a twelfth house sun. 

And I’m learning to live with that. 

Just kidding. Anyways, I love my 11th house stellium. If you’re unfamiliar, the eleventh house is ruled by aquarius. Each of the twelve houses in astrology corelate to each of the twelve signs of the zodiac. The planet which governs both this house and sign is the planet of Uranus, which is my favorite one in our solar system :) I did a random generator a guy posted on reddit to find out which planet is dominant in your chart, and when I plugged everything in, I got Uranus. I was actually quite surprised by this, but overjoyed. I love everything uranus represents. Eccentricity, humanitarianism, chaos.

I am a cancer sun, though, and virgo moon. Cancer rules the moon, so wouldn’t that be my dominant planet? Or is it just my chart ruler? I don’t know. But the moon is so fleeting. Kind of chaotic, actually. Since the moon passes each sign every few days, that’s what makes us cancers so moody. We feel the energy of all the signs within a months time. Can you imagine how that feels? constantly knowing what other people are feeling and thinking? Or maybe I’m just imagining it. I am crazy, after all :p

I digress. The 11th house is fabulous. It rules the finer things in life. My ex-boyfriend was a dandy man, took me to fancy restaurants and hotels, the works. I need that sort of thing, I admire and crave it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m very in tune with income inequality and the social issues that plague the world. But I still love dressing up in fancy clothes for a decadent night out. I suppose this is attributed to my stellium, but I’ll take it. A stellium by the way is when you have three or more planets in one house.

It’s kind of odd that my mom has an eleventh house stellium because we grew up quite poor. Nothing about her really screams fancy besides the fact that she adores drinking wine, is beautiful, and we live fancier only if you put us in to comparison with poorer people around us. We did grow up wearing nice clothes though. My mom would buy us second hand designer brand clothes like tommy hilfiger. Maybe that’s not designer, maybe that’s just brand name. I’m from Kentucky, give me a break. But we Kentucky fancy, baby.

Uranus being my dominant and favorite planet, is in my 7th house, the house of libra and relationships. Perhaps someone could pull up my chart {in the tags] and enlighten me on why it might be my dominant planet. I might also add that my draconic moon is in aquarius, which is supposely what your ‘soul’ truly is. I don’t quite believe that, because I think the soul is larger and smaller than the twelve signs of our universe. Or maybe just our solar system. At least of our conscience understanding of things at this time. Astrology is just a bunch of symbols made of our world to organize and communicate ieas n information. It’s not much more than that.

I recall being very internet savvy in middle and high school. My north node and chiron are in my third house, house of gemini and communication. All of my 11th house stellium planets are also in gemini. I see this being accurate because I am rather small in frame, standing at 5 foot 9 and weighing 125 pounds since I was thirteen years old. My mouth gets me in trouble, whether it’s from accidentally offending or just not being able to shut up! I would constantly be editing my myspace profile, using html codes, messing with the layout and how it interacted with my profile picture and song, and anything else I added to it. I loved it, and then that transitioned to my tumblr blog which I did in high school. Hopefully tumblr doesn’t die out, it’s definitely not what it used to be. Later when stumbleupon was something, I would look up things about futurism, humanism, design. I loved reading about the future. It made me so freaking excited. Like what will life be like in 2040? So cool! Or 2600? Then it made me sad once I accounted my age into the picture. I don’t wanna be 40! and that’s so far away! I hate waiting. 

I’ll end this post on something interesting I noticed. My boyfriend of a year had an eleventh house stellium. After we broke up, I had two guys I was interested in. I was actually quite torn, because they were both so amazing, but so different. One was elegant and familiar with astrology and addiction issues and had money. He was like this worldly man with fantastic package hehe helped cure this mundane “what’s the point?” feeling I had about learning languages and stuff. He made me feel like there was in fact a point to all of it. He’s a scorpio just like me mum and we just had great chemistry. But I was already seeing a nother guy, who was this gentle, down the earth, all around manly man’s man. I loved him, but in a different way. He was simple, but the first time I slept over at his house, he picked me up in this kinda old but kinda new like beat up stick shift hyudai sedan. He reminded me of Wario. But he had an amazing package as well. we mostly just slept though ,and when I slept with him, I felt like I was back in bed with my father when I was like five or seven years old. I already know how that sounds, and I know the childish bunch of you or dommage who lack a healthy relationship with your father if y’ar, are going to come for me and say that’s gross or messed up or perverted or weird. It’s not. I don’t want to fuck my father, I never have, and I never will. I really don’t want to open this can of worms because I could go on about people I’ve met who have been sexually assaulted by their fathers or who have an incest fetish and I’m not trying to shame any of those people. But, I felt like I was back in bed with my father like i was when i was a kid while I was laying with him, and that was a really, really, really good feeling. I never forgot it. He had an aries sun, which I used to hate aries. It was my least favorite sign, and probably still is tbh, along with aquarius LOL. Oh and his moon was in taurus which explained everything. My dad is a taurus sun, as are my two sisters, my grandpa, and one of my good friends, Chelsea. My moon is in virgo in the second house, which is the house of taurus.

Well, mr. fancy pants had an 11th house stellium, and my down to earth sweet S had a third house stellium. Finding these things out did nothing to absolve my confusion, only added to the ache of not knowing which to choose. Talk about love triangle though. It did make me realize why I was in this predicament though, and I suppose it worked out because I don’t really talk to either guy anymore. But The seventh and third houses are also air houses, just like the 11th. 

11th house - Aquarius/uranus, 

7th house - libra/venus, 

3rd house - gemini/mercury

That’s all for tonight. I’m ever behind on french homework, so I oughtta go take care of that. I want to write on the twelfth house, since my sun is in there as well as my father’s, and why I don’t appreciate its doom and gloom persona. If each house correlates to a sign, then the twelfth’s would be house of pisces. Pisces is the last sign with a bad stereotype. At least from my perception, it’s one of the best. So humanistic and kind. So why is its house the house of prison and addictions and psych wards and have all this hubbub, this &thatt?

Au revoir! -K  ý ll

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Useless warning pt. 1|2 [Sirius Black x Reader] - Challenge

Title: Useless warning pt. 1 ➔ Useless warning pt. 2, Here! Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader Word count: 3.9k Published: 29 July, 2020 Warnings: Angst Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: I wrote this for Amelia's Writing Challenge [ @hufflefluff-writer​ ], where I had to use the the below prompt, however I kind of ran away with the storyline and instead of a one shot it became a multiple part story. I think my mind just went rogue with this one, don't judge me :D - I would also like to state thatt I have nothing against Marlene. I just needed her to be in a negative spotlight for the story.

"I told you not to fall in love with me!"

I also added the song that inspired my mood at the end of the fic

Summary: Sirius is one of your best friends who happens to be dating Marlene. She isn’t particularly a good friend of yours, but you do get along. She agrees to go out with Sirius, all the while she is aware of your feelings. Things get complicated as you are unable to keep your feelings to yourself anymore.

Challenge: [x] [x]

Harry Potter Characters Masterlist | Masterlists

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You were sitting in the Gryffindor common room, resting your head on Remus' shoulder. Deep sighs left your lungs every few seconds, gazing at Sirius trying to steal a kiss from Marlene. It was hard to watch him giving his undivided attention to someone else.

You have been in love with him for a year or so. It was inevitable. Even when you became friends, years ago, you already thought he was handsome, but the years just helped him to look even more attractive. He has jokingly warned you in the past numerous times not to ever fall in love with him. He knew the kind of person he was. He changed girls more often than he changed his cloths. You tried to obey his request, but years of being his best friend, getting to know him more than he knew himself, turned your feelings around.

You sighed once again as you watched him placing his palm behind Marlene's neck, pulling her into a passionate kiss. That strong grip around your aching heart has become a daily occurring. As scary as it was, you kind of adapted to the pain their pair caused you. Even though Sirius was a player, his relationship with Marlene has been ongoing for the past three months, confirming what you have been afraid of the most. You knew he wasn't far from falling for Marlene. She was stunning with a good brain and funny comments. She was undeniably one of the most popular girls of Hogwarts, making you feel utterly defeated.

You exhaled deeply at the thought of watching them for the next year before you finally left Hogwarts. You wanted nothing more than to leave them and jump into whatever your future brought to you.

"Are you okay?" Remus whispered above you.

"Yeah..." You replied weakly.

"You have been sighing an unusual amount of times." He said and you knew very well that you looked like a love-sick puppy.

"I only have to survive a year." You turned your head upwards to be able to look at his face. His eyes were attached to the couple, just like yours a second ago. His hair was a mess, his expression unhappy. "Why do you look so troubled?" You asked.

"Because it's hard to watch you suffer." He pulled a pained half-smile, making you chuckle.

"Come on now, Remus. I am fine. I honestly got used to it already." Your voice was soft and reassuring.

"Used to what?" He asked, his brows furrowed.

"The pain in my chest." You confirmed. "I have felt it for so long now, it's kind of like a part of me." You giggled even though it was nowhere near happy. He finally turned to you, managing to look into your eyes in a rather weird angle.

"That shouldn't be something you have to get used to." He shook his head.

"I know, Remus, but unfortunately that is exactly how unrequited love works." You shrugged nonchalantly.

"She knew." Remus said and you knew what he meant without questioning him.

"Yes, she did, but it doesn't mean she should have said no. Remus, look, Sirius likes Marlene, Marlene likes Sirius. Just because she knew of my feelings, you can't expect them not to get involved with each other. You are only thinking that way because you are my friend." You explained, once again heaving a deep sigh. The powerful hold around your chest reappeared and you welcomed it as an old friend.

"I would never date someone my friend likes." He huffed, annoyance clear in his voice.

"I have never really been friends with her. We just got along when we needed to." You said.

"Still, it's making me uncomfortable." He said as he shrugged and you lifted your head from his shoulder.

"Remus, don't worry so much. You are more worked up about it than I am." You chuckled at his protective behaviour. He just shook his head, knowing that you were simply pretending to be strong, but deep down you were hurting more than you showed. It was always like that. Hiding your feelings were something that you learned through out the years to protect yourself.

"What's so funny over there." Sirius joined the conversation, hearing your giggling. Your eyes met his captivating grey orbs, for a second leaving you breathless, before you found your voice.

"You don't have to know everything, Sirius." You spoke with a small smile, turning back to Remus who was shaking his head with the same expression.

"You are unbelievable." Remus said, suddenly standing up, pulling you with him and dragging you out of the common room. You could feel Sirius' curious gaze on your back, but you didn't turn your head to look at him. You were more interested in what Remus was planning.

"Where are we going?" You asked, whilst he was pulling you after himself.

"I got fed up of the act, that you have put up. Do you think I can not see that your smile is nowhere near genuine? I rather drag you out and get suspicious looks, than keep watching you suffer." He was quite agitated to your surprise.

"Look Remus, I am fine." You tried to reassure him.

"No, you are not. Enough of acting though. You know what you need? You need to tell him that you love him." He halted abruptly on an empty corridor and turned around, folding his arms in front of his chest.

"What?" You asked as if you have heard him wrong, brows running high, mouth agape. You certainly believed that your hearing has become impaired.

"Tell him you love him." He said firmly, confirming his seriousness.

"That will never happen." You smiled awkwardly as if you were trying to tell him that he was insane.

"Look, I know it sounds like a strange, rather weird idea, but the only way you will get over him is if you confess to him. He will reject you and you can have closure." He attempted to explain his reasoning and he was indeed successful. He made the little gears work harder in your brain then ever.

"I mean... but what if our friendship will be ruined?" You tried to argue his point, not because he wasn't right, but because you were terrified of rejection. Sirius wasn't just a friend or a crush, he was more to you than anyone else, making your situation ever so complicated.

"Then it will be ruined." He shrugged, making you frown at his nonchalant reply. "You can't stay by his side, while he drools over other women. I can't watch you putting up a fake smile and pretend that everything is just fine, when deep down you are trying to hide an excruciating heartache." You heaved a deep sigh as he finished his monologue, knowing how right he was.

"Fine, I will do it tomorrow." You said, your voice beyond broken. You never wanted to lose Sirius, but at this point you knew that you would have to face the consequences of your feelings. As much as you wanted to deny it, Remus knew you way too well, to understand how hard you tried to pretend to be fine in all circumstances and it wasn't healthy.  

"Good. Right after classes I will call him to the Wooden bridge." He stated and you nodded in confirmation. He walked up to you and placed his hand on your shoulder, gently squeezing it. "Don't be down. Think of it as an end to something painful and a new beginning to something beautiful." You chuckled at his wise words, but nodded in anticipation.

"You always know what to say." You smiled as you started walking back to the common room. "By the way where were we headed?" You asked curiously.

"Nowhere, I just wanted to get you out of there." He shrugged with an awkward smile.

"Well, it worked." You shook your head at his unusual behaviour, but your smile never faltered.

Upon returning to the common room, Sirius questioned you about your whereabouts, but you just exchanged a quick smile with Remus and shook your head, leaving him in suspense.

Your night was long and hard, nervousness quickly taking over you as Remus left you alone. You have been thinking of all the ways you wanted to tell Sirius about your feelings, but deep down you knew, that you would not remember any of your thoughts by the next day.

After hours of rolling around and endless sighing, you finally gave up on torturing yourself and let sleep overcome you.

The next morning you jumped out of your bed and before you knew it, you were sitting in the Great Hall, right next to Remus. Soon Sirius arrived with Marlene on his arm, leaning over you to give you a kiss on the top of your head, just like every morning.

"Morning, guys." He said, taking a seat beside you, Marlene on his other side. He received a couple of replies, but not one from you. You looked at Remus, who gave you an annoyed eye roll, before turning back to his breakfast. You had to acknowledge that he has been hanging out with the boys way too much. Beside his kind personality, he definitely picked up some of those typical marauders attributes, which mostly consisted of sarcastic replies, eye rolls and annoyed scoffs.

You chuckled at his manners, before turning back to your food. He knew how badly Sirius' attentive behaviour affected you, even with that small smile plastered across your face. Remus just always knew what you thought and it definitely brought you closer.

By the end of classes, you were standing at the Wooden bridge, arms resting on the edge of the handrail, whilst watching the view and waiting for Remus to send Sirius over. Your thoughts were a mess of what ifs and hows, but you didn't have much time to think as you saw Sirius' form appear at the end of the bridge.

He walked up to you, his back leaning against the side of the bridge with a questioning look.

"You know, this is suspicious right?" He asked and you raised a brow at him. "Instead of you coming to me and asking me to meet you here, you send Remus to do it." He clarified his words.

"Yeah..." You replied hesitantly, not wanting to tell him that it was all Remus' idea.

"So what's up? Why did you want to talk to me?" He asked impatiently, which made you furrow your brows.

"Someone is in a rush." You replied with a scoff.

"I have promised a date to Marlene." He shrugged.

"So you simply don't have time for your friend." You raised a brow questioningly. "Next time I will just book an appointment." You spoke, clearly annoyed.

"Don't be cute. You know that's not what I meant." He attempted to save the situation.

"But you did though. I wanted to talk to you about something that's very important to me, but what do I get? You, trying to rush me to get it over with, because you have a date." You hissed in anger.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think of it this way." He sighed, whilst trying to get an eye contact from you, unsuccessfully.

"Whatever." You shook your head in a reply. A few seconds of silence fell up on you, before he spoke again.

"What bothers you?" He asked as he turned around, joining you in gazing over the rift under the bridge.

"It's very complicated. I don't really know how to talk about it." You started, making him frown.

"Is something wrong?" He asked.

"It's not... I mean..." You heaved a deep sigh at being unable to create a coherent sentence. "My head is a mess of thoughts." You scoffed, trying to organise what you really wanted to say.

"What is it? You know you can tell me anything." He tried to encourage you to talk. You finally looked up at him, his grey eyes curious as to what you wanted to say.

"Anything?" You questioned.

"Anything!" He repeated firmly.

"I don't think you will want to hear this, but I still have to say it though." You turned away from him, not wanting to see his disgusted expression. The knot in your stomach and the grip around your chest became stronger, your throat dried out as your anxiety heightened.

"There isn't a thing you can't share with me." He spoke with his lips curved up into a gentle smile.

"I love you." You blurted it out, deciding that it's better to just get it over with.

"I love you too." He replied, making you scoff, before a pained smile appeared on your face.

"No, you don't get it." You shook year head. You lifted your face, looking up into his grey eyes, which seemed to be more confused than you have ever seen them." I love you the way you like Marlene." You clarified your feelings for him, watching as his eyes grew wider by the second.

"What?" His voice was weak and shocked at the same time. His demeanour less confident than ever.

"You heard it." You spoke firmly, your nervousness long out of your system. You knew his answer,  you knew him. There were no questions left. You simply waited for him to process what you have just told him.

"But... I told you not to fall in love with me!" He replied, his words weaker than you have ever heard.

"Feelings are not something people can control. Believe me, if it depended on me, I would have never fallen for you." You replied.

"You never showed it, though." He spoke, surprising you with his words.

"I mean, we were friends and I knew you would never look at me that way." You explained looking straight into those grey irises. Your voice sounded calm and collected, your demeanour firm and though.

"I'm not sure what you want me to say." He spoke hesitantly.

"I want you to reject me." You said confidently, causing his brows to run high.

"What?" He asked in shock.

"The only way I can get closure is if you reject me." You explained with a shrug. He looked ever so confused at your behaviour.

"You are taking this quite well." He spoke with a frown and you knew exactly what he meant. Of course, you did. You became so good at pretending to be fine, that it was almost natural not to show your real feelings around others.

"I guess, I do." You spoke in a relaxed tone.

"Erm... I'm... I don't know what to say. You know, I am with Marlene." He shook his head slightly, trying to find the right words. "I just can't do this." He said, his voice defeated.

"That's fine." You replied, making him frown.

"You are scaring me, you know?" He spoke, his eyes looking for something in yours, that you knew he would never find. You could feel your tears collecting in your eyes, but you didn't let them leave. Not just yet. "You are acting strange." He shook his head lightly.

"No, I am not. I came here to tell you that I loved you and I knew before I even decided to confess, that I would be rejected. I was simply prepared for it." You explained halfheartedly.

"Okay..." He replied hesitantly. "I have to go now, but I will talk to you later." His tone was soft and gentle as if he was scared of hurting you, even though you have stood there in your toughest form.

"Yeah..." You replied simply, assuming he has only said that to make you feel better. "See you." You told him as he was still standing there. You wished he was gone by now so you could just let all your feelings go, but his hesitant steps and slowly disappearing back, forced you to keep everything in, until finally he was out of sight.

You slid down the side of the bridge, letting your tears finally roll down your cheeks. Of course, you were hurting, your chest didn't even let the air in anymore. You felt like you were being suffocated. You were heaving for breathe as you felt your salty tears pour through your lips.

It was killing you to know that Sirius never even thought of you romantically. It hurt you to see him giving attention to all the other girls. It pained you to see him kiss Marlene so lovingly. But most of all, it teared you apart from the inside to know that he would never return your feelings.

You sat at the bottom of the bridge, legs pulled up to your chest, face hidden between your knees, tears escaping your bloodshot eyes. You just wanted to disappear from the castle, from the country, from the whole wide world.

You didn't even realise a presence beside you, only when a hand lifted your head and two soft lips attacked your own. Your eyes widened in surprise at the sight of the owner of the long black locks, but before you knew it, your eyelids flattered shut and you gave into the blissful feeling of his lips moving in synch with yours.

It was better than you ever dared to imagine. His lips were in perfect harmony with yours, making you moan into the kiss. You could feel the salty taste of your tears on your lips as he placed a hand behind your neck, pulling you even closer. He was captivating, he was giving you hope and you were cursing him for it. You didn't want your feelings to be played with.

He finally pulled away, leaning against your forehead, breathing heavily, along with you. You didn't even realise when your tears stopped streaming down your cheeks.

"You are not as strong as you pretend to be." He spoke with a pained expression, opening his grey orbs to look at you.

"Sirius..?" You questioned... everything. You didn't understand why he was there, why he kissed you, why he came back. Your head was a mess of confused thoughts.

"Why did you have to tell me how you feel?" He heaved a deep sigh, his breath shaky, feeling defeated. He pulled away from you and sat down beside you, leaning his back against the side of the bridge.

"I told you. To get closure." You replied hesitantly. You were nowhere near the expected closure. Your feelings were now more unbearable than ever.

"Closure for what? You just had to come and stir things up, didn't you?" He asked, massaging the bridge of his nose.

"Stir what up?" You asked furrowing at his unclear words.

"I was over you finally. Or at least I thought I was and then you decide to confess to me? How am I supposed to take that?" He raised his voice, hiding his face in his palm.

"Over... me?" You questioned hesitantly.

"Yes, I loved you." He lifted his head to look into your eyes. "I thought you would always look at me as a mere brother figure and I accepted it. That's why I always jokingly told you not to ever fall for me. But here you are now, telling me that you love me and I am not supposed to feel good about it, I am not. But I just can't deny that a part of me wants to jump out of my skin in happiness." He confessed, leaving you with parted lips and a shocked expression across your face.

"I... I didn't expect that." You spoke in confusion.

"Believe me, I didn't expect your confession either." He replied with a scoff.

"But... what do you feel then?" You asked, trying not to get your hopes any higher than they already were.

"I honestly don't know." He shook his head, letting out a deep sigh he has been holding onto. "A part of me is happy that you love me, but I'm not sure about what I feel and I don't know what to do with Marlene now." His voice was beyond defeated and you just wanted to pull him into a hug, to tell him that everything will be just fine, but you stopped yourself. You knew that it wouldn't help him now. It would just confuse him.

"You have to decide what you want. I can't help you with that." You spoke, trying to keep yourself composed.

"I know. I just need a bit of time." He said and you nodded in agreement. A few minutes of silence fell up on you, before he stood up and reached out for you to help you up. You accepted his hand and steadied yourself, but before you could have even looked up, he pulled you into his embrace, dipping his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent. You protectively wrapped your arms around his torso, enjoying his warmness around you. You wished you could enjoy his hugs longer, but you knew that it wasn't fair to any of you, including Marlene.

"As much as I enjoy hugging you, this is not going to help you." You spoke as you pulled away from him with a soft smile across your face.

"I know." He took a deep breath.

"Let's go back." You said, but he stood still, not even attempting to move, his adoring eyes fixed on your face. You shook your head, rolled your eyes and started gently nudging him towards the castle, chuckling.

"You know, I can walk on my own." He smirked at your forceful behaviour.

"Yeah, but you didn't move though." You argued playfully.

"A simple please would have worked just fine." He replied.

"As if I was ever begging for anything." You scoffed.

"I can think of one or two reasons." He raised an eyebrow, before your deadly expression forced a loud chuckle to leave his lungs.

"Just shut up. That I would beg for." You rolled your eyes at his childish behaviour.

You went back to the castle, parting ways at the entrance as Marlene appeared. She questioned his whereabouts, but you quickly got involved by telling her that you needed to talk to Sirius and you didn't realise the time. She seemed to believe you, although a sceptical look rushed across her face, before it quickly disappeared.

Tags: @haphazardhufflepuff , @inkhearthes

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don't forget to like and/or reblog the chapter. Thank you :)

I’ll just put this here, because this song had a big impact on my mood when writing.

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don’t forget to like, comment and/or reblog the chapter. Thank you :)

If you enjoy my stories, please consider donating and supporting me on Ko-fi. Of course, it’s completely your choice, I will continue updating for free anyway :) Thank you <3

[diamondcamefromhell]

Hunt

Jaskier x Witcher!Reader

Summary: This was a request from @oldfashionedvillain-x :  I was thinking Where the reader is a female witcher and has been travelling with Geralt for a while and when they meet Jaskier he is determined to get her attention because she isnt like other girls and after a rivalry eventually he gets close to her

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 1, 649

A/N: tHank you Ash for requesting such a good idea! it was really fun to write, esp perpective being from a witcher, and jaskier just trying to please her and what not ahhh thank you! i truly hope you like it <3 i know its a bit all over the place, so sorry abt thatt

Traveling with Geralt was as fun as traveling with a Witcher gets – not fun. But being a Witcher myself, I tolerated his company just enough. But then he went for some ale because he wanted to drink alone, well. He came back. Not alone.

Jaskier was fascinated that I was a woman and a witcher. It took him mere minutes to compose a song about me, where he clearly tried to impress me, putting as many compliments as one could possibly fit in one ballad. I chose to ignore him, glaring at Geralt, who also seemed to be annoyed at the bard.

I jumped on my horse, Night, as Geralt sat on Roach. I saw Jaskier look from horse to horse, and before he could even mutter anything, I ushered my animal to move. Geralt followed, and the bard was left to tag along of foot. Which he did. Sadly.

His mind must be working overtime, as he was chatting non-stop. I wasn’t really paying attention, but did notice that Geralt and I both were riding slower, so the bard could keep up. His mouth was working at superspeed, as he now picked up his lute and began singing, trailing behind us a little bit.

“Seriously, Geralt?” I hiss at my companion, who gives me a stare. “Don’t give me that look, you brought him along.”

“I think he stayed for you.” Geralt mutters, as I roll my eyes. Jaskier seems oblivious to our conversation, so I continue.

“Do you plan on protecting him? Because I’m not helping you with that.” I grunt, as my horse neighs. I pet the nuzzle, knowing he must be frustrated having to walk so slowly.

“Leaving him now would be the death of him.” Geralt responds, and I see him glance at the bard, who still is enjoying himself.

“I know, but until we reach another town, at this paste, it will take us days.” I respond, stopping my horse. Jaskier nearly walks to it’s arse, as I break a smile. “C’mon. At least this will stop you from playing that damn thing.”

“Y/N, are you offering me a ride?” He asks as I roll my eyes, petting Night, who is anxious to run a little.

“Climb up and shut up.” I grunt as Geralt stops Roach just a little ahead of us. The bard takes his time climbing Night, but eventually he manages, his hands wrapping around my waist. “Watch the hands.”

“If I don’t hold on, I will fall.” I grit my teeth, ushering the horse to a sprint, overtaking smirking Geralt.

“See if I care.” I finally respond, as the wind plays with my hair, calming me down.

We travel for a couple of days, I allow Jaskier to ride with me, mostly because I am anxious to dump him in the next town. He tried to chat me up, but if he does it too much, I make him walk. He now learnt, not about being quiet, no, but about not talking to me. Directly.

That, of course, only matters until we set camp. Then every evening he doesn’t shut up, trying to get anything he can out of me. He shows such pure interest, sometimes I am painfully reminded I was an experiment. And that’s why I am interesting. I know Jaskier doesn’t mean any harm, but I wish he would shut up.

We were at a tavern now, as he was performing. Geralt and I were drinking ale, silently. I wondered if we will ever be able to get rid of the bard, as he seemed so eager to tag along. I chug last bit of the drink, looking at Geralt, who’s yellow eyes land on mine.

“We’re stuck with him.” I point out the obvious, and Geralt offers a hmm to me. “Great, you have good ideas about how to unstuck him from us.”

“He’s interested in you.” I squint at the Witcher, hu shrugs. “He needs to see how not interesting you are, maybe then…”

“Thanks.” I cut him off, as smile enters his face.

“Usually women don’t complain about attention.” I lean back, crossing my arms.

“Usually those women aren’t witchers, Geralt.” I point out as his face grows ever so sour. I know it’s impossible to, but he seems to sometimes forget I am like him. An experiment. Tossed into the world to kill monsters, protecting most men.

Those very same men who hate us. I was surprised when this tavern allowed two witchers in. Of course, some patrons were shooting angry glares our way and there were whispers. But those followed us wherever we went.

Our kind was a rare occurrence, as our numbers were decreasing. Two witchers at the same time was even rarer sight, as for the most part, we preferred to be alone. And on top of all of that, add the fact that I am a woman.

Not many men would ask a woman for help, witcher or not. So tagging along with Geralt was pretty much my only way of making coin. He would get us jobs, I’d assist, we split the payment.

I am startled when Jaskier plops down next to me. He is blabbering about something, but I completely ignore that, sliding away from him, edging my seat.

“Don’t worry Y/N, I don’t bite.” He says, noticing my movement. I glare at him.

“You couldn’t bite me if you tried.” I hiss at him, as he lets out a giggle. The bard doesn’t seem to be phased by my aggression.

“Don’t challenge me.” He winks at me as I turn away, giving Geralt a glare yet again.

To my surprise and the fellow Witchers great amusement, Jaskier pretends to nib at me, biting the air near my shoulder. I lean away from him, stopping his face with my hand.

“Stop.” I say, not being able to withhold a smile. Dammit. Jaskier notices that, grinning.

“Don’t play all though on me.” He says, winking yet again, before springing to his feet. It takes me a moment to realize he went to get more beer.

“He’s an interesting thing.” Geralt points out as we both follow him with our eyes.

“Indeed.” I agree.

Needless to say, Jaskier didn’t stay put. He tagged along with us, until we couldn’t really imagine traveling without him. His constant blabber was still annoying, but soothing. His music also became more pleasant, even if we were test listeners to all his songs. Some of which weren’t that good at all.

Him tagging along became a norm, even if we would leave him, Night and Roach as we fought the monsters, later having to give him all the details, so he could write a ballad and sing it. I began warming up to him, not ever letting him know that, of course.

We were sitting in a warmed up room, Geralt taking a bath. Jaskier for once wasn’t fiddling with his lute, and it was silent, as I was cleaning both of my swords. I notice him staring at me, so I lift my gaze and face him.

“How did you and Geralt meet?” he asks, out of the blue.

“Some locals, they needed help. I guess the news reached me and Geralt, so we ended up arriving at the same time. The monster were a couple kikamoras, as the townsfolks were afraid of leaving their homes.” I shrug. “We took care of it. Then, I don’t know. I kind of tagged along.”

“Like me.” I glare at the bard, who smiles, not phased.

“At least I was useful to him.” I sigh, looking away. “And we got used to each other. Both beings of the same nature, we didn’t need to talk to get how the other may be feeling.”

“But witchers don’t have feelings.” Jaskier says sarcastically and I offer him a sad smile.

“We are also monstrosities, brutal killers.” I close my eyes for a moment. “Horrible, horrible creatures.”

“I never believed that.” I look at him as he crosses his arms. “And I don’t think you don’t have feelings. You just don’t show them.”

“In their eyes it’s the same thing.” I point out, but he giggles.

“But its not, is it?” I nod, agreeing.

“It’s not.” Jaskier gives me a kind smile, going from the other bed to sit next to me, I don’t move away. “You’re an interesting thing.”

“How come?” He asks as I shrug, falling backwards on the bed.

“People avoid Witcher. You stuck with two.” I finally say, after Jaskier continues to stare at me. He laughs, falling on the bed too.

“You both allowed me to stay. You protected me.” I cant disagree, so I remain silent. After a short while, bard continues. “I want the world to see that you aren’t that bad at all. Probably way kinder and better than any man.”

I turn my head to stare at him for a little bit. He is trying to change the way world works, one song at a time. I didnt have a heart to tell him it won’t work, or maybe part of me also hoped it would work. What if the world actually changed?

For weeks to come, slowly but surely, Jaskier and I had more insightful conversations. As Geralt would bathe or do whatever Geralt does, we would sit and chat, and it didn’t take me long to realize I actually enjoy his company. 

When he wasn’t trying to flirt or write a song, or any other way be Jaskier-annoying, he was a great listener and advice giver. 

As someone with not too many life experiences himself, I noticed not only does he learn from everyone else, he does it swiftly. That’s why he is such a good story teller and writer, he can put himself in other shoes so easily.

He kept telling me I am not like other girls, and I began to wonder, does he even know he’s not like other guys? 

[doc-pickles]

it’s nothing funny just to talk (p. 1)

What happens when you text that random number graffitied on a bathroom stall in your favorite bar? Jo Wilson is about to find out. - In which Bar Princess and Doctor Evil Spawn meet via text.

More Jolex on your timeline because y’all seemed to love what I posted before! Also I’ve posted this whole piece on AO3 as well so it might look familiar.  

this idea came to me in a fever dream and i am not sorry that y'all have to deal with it. 99% of this fic will be in "texting" format, so be prepared for that. 

Jo is regular Alex is italics

Saturday 11:04 PM

heeeeey is thiss doctor evil?

I gotta say ur phone sex namee needs sum weerk

u soud like a comic book village 

fuck

village

VILLAIN

Who the hell is this? And how did you get my number? 

i’m just a girl at thee bar!!!! 

Joe’s Bar?

noooooo

i’m at enerlad city bar

You didn’t answer my question. 

u asked a quesitoon?

whata was it?

i’m goos at takifjg tests 

How’d you get my number?

it qas in the bathrooom!!!

it said “for a good tiem txt dr evil spawne” 

so I did

I am ready to havee fun

You’re drunk, obviously, and I’m going to have to kill Cristina for putting my number up. 

ooooooh is thatt ur girleifnd?

hirlefiend 

girlfriend**

Wow you’re really gone. And hell no, she’s my roommate. One of them. 

ooooh how many do u hav

roomees not girlfriends 

Three. Two girls and a dude. 

intereeesting...

well it’s tome for fireball shoots

steph is yeeling at me 4 txting too much

goodbey doctor eviel apawn!!

Oh lord. Tell Steph you need water. Or an IV. 

I’ve got her. she’s throwing up on her shoes. thanks doctor. - steph

  Sunday 10:11 AM

You know you’re pretty funny, Bar Girl. 

jesus christ what fucking time is it?! 

10 AM

I’m assuming you have a massive hangover. 

hold on I can’t hear you over the sound of me vomiting

TMI as the kids say these days. 

what’re you a grandpa or something?? 

No I just don’t know how to use text lingo. Except WTF. I know that one very well. 

quick question

who the fuck are you?

Dr. Evil Spawn. You found my name graffitied in the bathroom of Emerald City Bar. 

holy shit

I thought I dreamed that... WHAT THE FUCK

Nope. I’m real. 

holy shit i’m so sorry

my texts were so annoying

Who hurt you? I mean you were shitfaced, I’m assuming someone broke your heart into tiny pieces. 

the opposite actually, I was at a bachelorette party

not mine, i’m so single it hurts

Ahhh that makes sense. So you got shitfaced in solidarity? 

exactly you get it

you seem like you’d be the DD at a bachelorette party

Well seeing as I’m a dude I don’t do Bachelorette parties. 

Well I did go to one, but that’s a different story.  

hmmm you seem like a very interesting man doctor evil spawn 

going to bachelorette parties, living with women who aren’t your girlfriend 

OMG ARE YOU DATING THE GUY YOU LIVE WITH?!

George? No absolutely not. And before you ask, my other girl roommate is gay. 

so you’re single?

i’m only asking so when you murder me the police have as much information as possible

Haha very funny. I would be a terrible murderer. 

you didn’t answer my question

Fine. Yes I’m single. 

i’ll note that in the “serial killer file” i’m building 

gotta go, I have to do work :/

Have fun, don’t die. 

  Sunday 8:38 PM

Arizona is trying to set me up on a blind date. 

who’s arizona?

My gay roommate. She wants me to meet this “bubbly blonde” she knows from her pilates class. 

ahhhh. why don’t you go?

Bubbly blonde is not my type. Sounds like she’ll spend the whole date talking about how much she loves dogs or her knitting hobby. 

Plus she does pilates, that tells me more than enough. 

you’re making some good points. I don’t pity you. 

You better not. How was work?

the longest day of my life

it was just paperwork, I don’t actually work on the weekends

What do you do?

hmmmm that’s exactly what a serial killer would say

i’m an elementary school teacher

Oh so you sing and dance and paint pictures all day?

what school did you go to?

were working on multiplication tables and basic photosynthesis tomorrow

Wow that sounds like a lot.

it’s may, ive got three weeks of school left so I have to cram all the crap we didn’t cover into these last few weeks 

Ahhh that sounds more accurate.

and what do you do? 

besides text strangers that you don’t know

I’m a pediatrician. 

oh so you make kids cry and wipe snotty noses all day? two can play at that game

Well we both have to deal with snotty noses sooo...

I GET IT!! Doctor Evil Spawn!! 

why evil spawn though? 

I wasn’t this nice when I started med school. My personality is an acquired taste. 

ha! that’s a funny joke. 

so if you’re a fancy schmancy doctor why do you live with three other people?

I’m only a resident, not making the big bucks yet. Everyone else is a doctor too. 

are they all pediatricians?

No. Arizona is too but Cristina is a cardiologist and George is a trauma specialist. 

interesting!! I too live with my coworkers. it’s not fun. 

the table is always covered in craft supplies. 

Well I can never read the grocery list on the fridge. Stupid doctors script...

oh that’s a classic. you’re pretty funny Dr. Evil Spawn

Thanks Bar Girl. 

I gotta go. monday tomorrow and you know how fourth graders can be. night!! 

Night . 

  Monday 9:47 AM

there’s not enough coffee in the world for monday mornings. 

  Monday 10:52 AM 

Sorry I was yelling at the interns. We have a decent coffee cart here. Keeps me alive. Are you texting in class?

no it was recess

now they’re at spanish class

i’m not totally irresponsible 

Oh good to know the future of America is in good hands. Teacher Princess is “not totally irresponsible”

teacher princess?

Well, Cinderella lost her shoe, you puked on yours. Same thing. 

wooooooooow

that was so uncalled for...

I thought it was funny. Gotta go set a broken arm. 

broken arm vs. adverbs... can we switch? have fun lol

  Monday 3:26 PM

I don’t even think I know what an adverb is. 

how did you become a doctor??

Don’t need to know adverbs to fix a couple broken bones and snuffy noses. 

oh darn I should’ve gone to school for seven more years then

Haha. How were the adverbs?

better than expected, grading papers while I wait for my roomies to be done

we carpool, saving the environment and shit

Okay Eco Warrior.

you text like a 60 year old man

you’re not a 60 year old man are you?

No I’m a 28 year old man though

28 a doctor and you’re single? your personality must be worse than you described 

I’m a busy man, I don’t have time to settle down. And I have no desire to. 

yet you have time to text a complete stranger? 

hmmmm interesting...

Ouch, that one hurt Princess. 

steph is making me socialize with the other teachers

if I don’t respond, they killed me or dragged me to an essential oil party

Hahahaha

  Monday 5:18 PM

Did you get roped into a pyramid scheme?

nooo but therew as wine

I should sotp drunk texting you so often 

It makes your presence that much more entertaining. And bearable. 

woah woah dude

i’m a gem 

I can tell. Elementary school teacher with a heart of gold. 

awwww your too sweet tome

It’s a Monday. Who the hell gets drunk on a Monday?

teachers

we deserve it

You’re a teacher and you’re single and still going to Bachelorette parties. You’re what, 23? 

i’m 25 and i’m doing greta thanks you very nuch 

cnat believe that i’m supplying my perosnal info to a serial killer

What makes you so sure that I’m a mass murderer? 

ur weird nickname and ur intimate knowledge of the himan body

Mmm yes well a good amount of women do find themselves screaming around me often. Or under me. On top of me...

omg are you sending me dirty jokes

you’re crazy 

What can I say. 

Gotta go, I’m on call tonight. Get to bed safe, Bar Princess. 

mmmkay thanks Doc

  Wednesday 11:29 AM

What do you think is worse: School lunch or hospital food?

hospital food, no doubt

thursday is mac and cheese day here... I could bathe in that stuff

We have Spaghetti Wednesday but that’s the only good thing here. 

mmm how depressing

the teachers do a pot luck once a month and that’s always good

the art teacher next door to me makes the BEST blueberry muffins. 

Lucky. All I get here is vending machine cookies. Anything interesting happening in the elementary world? 

a first grader got lice last week so naturally we all have it now

I had to chop off six inches of my hair

Holy crap. Lice can be vicious, be thankful you didn’t have to shave your head. 

it feels like I did, my hair hasn’t been above my shoulders since the backstreet boys were still touring

Wow. I’m glad to know you’re well cultured. 

of course I am

gotta go, kids are back from music class

Don’t be too hard on them, they deserve a break every once in awhile. 

  Thursday 3:06 PM

Incoming Voice Call

“Jenna you forgot your lunch pail. Have a good day!”

“Hello?”

“Hi Mrs. Peters. I didn’t grade Henry’s test yet, I’ll have it tomorrow. Thanks bye!”

“Helloooo?”

“Steph I gotta grab my things, I’ll be there in a seco- oh shit. Hello?”

“Bar Princess?”

“Doctor Evil Spawn? I must’ve butt dialed you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay I... I don’t mind the interruption. Are you leaving work?”

“Just about, we’re wrapping up the solar system and I have to bring home the diorama.”

“I was never good at the models, I prefer working with the real thing.”

“Oh ho, a man that works with his hands. I can appreciate that.”

“You know now we’re officially talking and we still don’t know each other’s names.”

“Well around here I’m Miss Wilson, but you can call me Jo.”

“Jo. Hmm I like chicks with dudes names. I’m Dr. Karev but you can call me Alex.”

“Well nice to kinda meet you Alex. I’ll talk to you soon, I gotta get out of here.”

“Talk to you later.”  

  Thursday 4:34 PM

I wouldn’t mind if you were my teacher.

how did I know you’d send me something along those lines

I’m predictable. I’m still calling you Bar Princess. 

as you wish doctor evil spawn

I get to assist on a surgery today. Tonsillectomy. 

like removing tonsils? that’s awesome

for you, not for the kid

Oh she’ll be fine, she gets ice cream and jello for a week.  

okay yeah I might be jealous of her now

id love to be off work for a week and have you waiting on me hand and foot

the ice cream is a nice bonus

You think that’s my job?

well you said you aren’t making the big bucks yet so.... yeah 

Keep dreaming. I’ll talk to you later, gotta scrub in. 

have fun!!!!

[c0untb00z]

I would just like to clear, I don't hate the BBC Dracula 2020 Show. In fact, I actually like the idea of Dracula being set in modern times like in the show, but I would like it a lot better if it wasn't written like a fucking reader insert fanfiction.

Don't get me wrong, I love me some reader inserts every once in a while but they're meant to be on Wattpad. Sometimes, you can find really fucking good fanfictions that could genuinly be movies, but this really just feels like someone wrote an erotic fanfiction for Dracula. It almost reminds me of a worse version of 50 Shades of Grey with less kinky sex.

First and foremost Agatha Van Hesling. I actually kinda liked her personality, how driven she was and determined to never give up, but she was literally created for a love interest. In Dracula by Bram Stocker, Sister Agatha is a nun that nurses Jonathan back to health, claiming he was 'sick in the head' as he ranted of what he had seen and warning others of Dracula. She doesn't even have a last name.

However there is a Dr. Van Hesling in the book, hes dutch(???) Professor that mentors and taught(????) Jack Seward who was in love with Lucy, who was fed off of and eventually killed and eventually undead by the means of the one and only Dracula. Dr Van Hesling plays a large role in the plot of the book. He has an open mind and was able to draw connections between things that some others couldn't, as he had access to more sources and could speak to most off the charecters involved. He's the first person to present the idea of a vampire, and Lucy turning into one. Thanks to Jonathan he was able to identify the vampire feeding on Lucy as Dracula and finds out how to kill the vampires.

So basically Agatha was literally fabricataed for the sole perpose of being there, to fall in love with Dracula or something.

I know we all are horny for Dracula. I'm horny for Dracula. Vampires are fucking hot but the sexiest part of vampires is that they ya know. Kill you and are mercily and heartless. The show does show that in a lot of parts and even decapiates a nun and yeets it into a gaggle of nuns which i fucking died at. But it also, humanizes him way to much, hes literally a monster. The scene in the boat with lord whats his name really portrayed that. It was really,,,, weird cause me being a kinky fucker I don't find the particular phrases of "you're going to need to be quiet now," and " youre doing so well" that creepy and if anything a little hot but looking at the circumstance and the look on that kids face, it was like r e a l y fucked up. Which is why i liked that scene. It showed just how fucked up Dracula is.

To be fair i did like Cleas Bangs acting and casting as Dracula. He had a certain charm that was ever so s l i g h t l y off. I heard people say he just 'made up an accent' but fuck you guys its a fucking danish accent you incolent twats anyways. He could be really funny at times and i actually apprecited it.

However the casting AND acting of the modern parts is absolute shit. Ep.3 is where i kinda gave up on the show and finsihed it for the sake of torturing myself. FIRST OF FUCKING ALL LUCY i cannot fathom how P I S S E D i am about Lucy. Why did they have to make her a phone obsessed basic asshole with no regards to anyones emotions besides her own and the extent of her personality is 'getting likes on socail media is all i care about because it makes me feel validated so im gonna wallo in self pity because i was obiously written by white man in his 50s that would have made me white if he wasnt forved to throw in diversity points" like shut the fuck up steven king.

Also lucy and mina never meet??? Theyre in different fucking time lines??? Theyre friendship and love for eachother was fucking golden how dare you rob that form me and give me a garbage bag full of shit with a shiny little bow on top in its place jesus f u ck.

The cemetary scene was o k ay i gues?? I liked the little nod to the book with the bloofer lady and the concept of random sprits being undead because of unfinished buisness. But this really just felt like it was slapped in the show for the sake of going on a date with Dracula in cemetary. I actually kinda apperacted it but it just felt awkward.

Also who the f u ck is Lucy's friend? The gay one??? Like,,,, is that supposed to Arthur???? His chatecter was so fu king weird and offset he just didnt feel like he should be in there. Hes literally just there for a-50-year-old-man's-interpretation-of-young-women-now-a-days verson of Lucy to have a gay best ffriend.

Ok i not even sure if i want to talk about Quincy. It just hurts. It physically hurts me to think about how d i r t y they did my baby. His charecter is the defination of american chivalry, just as great as regular chivarly but with a little extra cowboy vibe. Quincy is jist the biggest,,,, sweet haert,, like he asked lucy to marry him in his cool american cowboy voice cause he knew lucy loved it and it always made her laugh. And even when she turned him down becayse her heart belonged to arthur, he stayed. All he wanted was for lucy to be happy and all he requested was that they stay frirnds. Hes also invovled with taking fkwn dracula although hes not a main charecter percice ly as he doesnt have any entires in the book he still has an amaizing precence and sometimes while reading the book ill be readying one of dr sewards passanges and think "huh i wonder what quncys doin. I hope hes dooin good. Cowboy vibes n stuffs" amd boy dles he do that. Everh dracula film adaptataion robs us. R O B S U S of quincy morris best scene. In the middle of dr van helsing ranting about vampires( thats basically what half of the book is. I could write a 4p minute mono louge of his rambling jesus how does sweard take note of all this) quincy litterally just walks out. And nobodg really pays any notice beside glancing ag his leave and shrugging at one anouther and going back tl listneing tl van helsing explaining his vampire fan theories quincy moris , the quincy morris from texathe untited states of the amerkca the land and the free and also cowboys.stands outside of the bouilding and pints his gun up at. Dracula whos in the shape of a fucking bat eves ddopping outside the window and just fucking,,shoots it. Now he doesnt hit it cause thatt wouldnt be as fun as brutally stabbing the fucker witja wooden stake. But S T I L L. And the fucking bullet hits the window that everybodys in anprobably causes arthur to shit himself the ppoor boy. Can you belive that theh didnt fucking flim thatfor any dracul? Now i i under stands why not put in this adaptation because quincy is only mentionsed like three god damned times. And when theh DK mention him jesusnshit they literally jsut made him some popular jock from amwrica just to conter jacks white twinky ass and then they had him propose to lucy in the middle of a fucking night club and she says yes???? Lile ok jut throw Arthur out a window then cause cause fu c k him i guess. And then after lucy dies he jjsy fucking moves ?? The only thing thta makes this version of qincy quinccy is the fu king name and fact hes from america

Ok now jack fucking seward. He reminds me of when ylu forget you had a pb&j in your back pack so in the bos after school you pull it out cause yoyr hungry and yoyr mom put WAY to much jelly on it so now its like. All obsorbed into the bread and joggy and squished. Just sad and really white. They even had some kid call him whate bread and they werent fucking wrong. His obly personality traits were ' omg i love lucy but shes a hoe ;,,,((' and being connected to Zoe.

Now last and definately least the god forbaden ending. Just thinking about it gives me a fucking head ache. So , jesus, zoe, who is agathas great niece or someshit, a d looks exactly like her (its literally the same fucking actress) is a detective lile scitist reasearching dracula. So dracula is illedatly attracted to her becasue he thinks shes like agathas reincarnation or soenshit. So he tries tk drink her blood at one point and spits it all out and pukes and sjit cause her blood is poisonous bevaise she has fucking c an c e r. So later we find out that draculas weaknesses ( the sun crucifix) arnt actually real hes just afraid of dying so he has like irration fears or some shit so for some fucking reason. They deside. Its a good iea to end the show with this:

Dracula fucking drinks all of zoes blood killing her and himself because her blood poisonus. And ghe fucking emd scene is them like,,, in the sun???? Or soemt hi ng??? And theyre naked and like presumably fucked and dracula says some shit like " its doesnt have to hurt" and i almost tore my wrist open wiith my teeth because of how shitty this ending is.

Not lnly is it disrespectful to zoe but agatha, agathas whole thing was K I L I N G. dracula she wanted him fucking D E A D she woULDNT FUCK HKM

And like just after finding out that he can be in the sunlight with out fucking dying and that crosses just make him umcomfortable or some shit he just desides to kill himself??? DUDE YOU JUST FOUND OUT YOURE PROACTICALLY MORE INVINCABLE THAN YOU WERE BEFORE AND YOU JSUT FUCKING OFF YOUR SELF ??? HE COULD HAVE FUCKING RULED ENGLAD AND SPEAD VAMPIRISM OLL LVER THE FUCKING COUNTFY AND WORLD KF HE TRIED HARD ENOUGH AND HE KILLS HIMSELF BECAUSE THEY WANTED A STUPID SAPPY ENDING

anyway if anyone actually goes through the effort of reafing my god damn eS S A Y about Dracula that i finkshed typing (im not gonna bother editing tbh) at 4 fucking am. Then thank you and please get a life

[spideyyroos]

are you kidding me? - peter parker (soulmate!au) - part 2

are you kidding me? - peter parker (soulmate!au) - part 2

pairing: peter parker x stark!female!reader

summary: during your everlasting rivalry against peter parker, you’re unlucky enough to find out that not only is he spider-man (your dad’s new kid), but he is also your soulmate. god help us all. (soulmate au where you have a mark of where your soulmate first touches you)

word count: 1288

requested: yes!

warnings: language, slight angst

a/n: hey guys, thank you so much for all the love on the first part of this series! i appreciate every single like and reblog. tbh this series might the slightest bit of slow burn bc i don’t want to rush it and ya girl wants to (eventually) make hella angsty chapters you feel;)) but then again idk lmao. also, hello to my new followers! thanks again, love you all! please feel free to ask me to add you to the taglist :)

[part 1]

The moment in which his hand and her arm touched, where they saw bits and pieces of their future together, the warmth that enveloped was a comfortable amount. The one that one feels him or herself fall asleep to, the one that one feels when the love of his or her life says those three words that are beautiful and terrifying all at once.

Peter and Y/N were both wide-eyed, so still that they practically weren’t breathing. Y/N started breathing heavy, taking in that Peter fucking Parker was her soulmate. Of course, she was prepared for anyone to be her soulmate; but, why him? God, of all people, it had to be him. She couldn’t pinpoint her hatred for him aside from academics. Sure, Peter wasn’t the most revolting thing on Planet Earth, but it made Y/N cringe at how easily he could under her skin. He might as well take one breath and make her scream at him to “Shut up!”

Peter, on the other hand, watched as Y/N tried to recoil from the contact, only for his grip to tighten. Don’t pull away, Peter thought. Her face twisted, Did I just hear you? Peter’s face matched Y/N’s. In that moment, they forgot that once one touches his or her soulmate, they can feel their pain, emotional and/or physical;they can hear the other’s thoughts; two people become one with their soulmate.

“Okay listen. I know that you hate this, a lot actually, but eventually we’ll have to come around. If we just try--” Peter tried to reason with Y/N but was cut off by a scoff.

“--Stop, okay? Personally, I think the universe slipped up on this soulmate thing. There is absolutely no way that you could possibly be my soulmate--”

“--Is this because you’re a Stark? You’re so high and mighty that anyone who had the potential of loving you is too weak or dumb compared to you? Huh? Is that why I’m such a threat to your life and that you have no other way of responding than hate?” Peter snapped at Y/N, digging deep into her mind and tearing her apart. As he spit venom with each word he spoke, Y/N flinched and felt the wetness in her eyes fall onto her face. Never had she been spoken to in such a manner, even when Tony was at his worst. Peter ended up breathing heavy from his sudden outburst. Seeing how her eyes shone with fear and guilt, he backed away from the close space that they were enclosed in.

I’m sorry...I think it’s best if we call it a day, Y/N thought. Peter nodded, daring to go and give the broken girl an awkward side hug.

See you later, Parker.

-----

10:47 p.m.

Peter finally made it to Y/N’s window after one of his many checks for any crime in Queens. He peeked in to see Y/N sitting with her knees drawn to her chest, tears fresh on her face as she watched one of the many rom-coms that she had watched that night. He sighed with relief as he realized that his waves of sadness throughout the night came from the tear-jerking movies. He watched as she reached for yet another tissue, adding to the pile that resided on her bed. She didn’t notice him, being thatt she was too distracted by the movie in front of her.

Peter paused as he raised his fist to knock on her window. Should he just go home and leave Y/N be or should he the bigger person in initiating their soon to be relationship? He swallowed his doubts down and knocked on the window. Y/N slowly dragged her eyes away from the TV to look at her window. Seeing Peter, Y/N wiped at her face for any excess tears that escaped. She got off her bed and went over to open her window, letting Peter in.

“Hey, what’s up?” Y/N asked. She sniffled and attempted to take attention away from the fact that she was just crying. Peter knew that it was partially his fault; he sent his apologies her way multiple times throughout that day, only for all his attempts to be ignored. “I thought that we were gonna call it a day,” Y/N awkwardly chuckled as she continued to stare at the ground.

“With all due respect, do you really want to make jokes right now?” Peter blurted out. Y/N’s head snapped up at him. He was able to see her broken expression as he yet again put salt into the wound. Peter’s eyes widened, “God, sorry--I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. Just, I don’t know how you can cope with your feelings by joking around. Shit, that came out wrong too. I just came in to check on you, but I think I should leave--”

“No wait,” Y/N was quick to grab his arm as he turned his back towards her, “stay...you can stay if you want to.”

Peter was surprised by her sudden change of heart. He briefly nodded, turning around to face her. He took in her appearance: simple pyjama shorts with a slightly larger school sweatshirt adorned by her once tear-stained face. Y/N looked at Peter’s Spider-Man suit, remembering back to when Tony and she had spent countless nights trying to figure out the best web shooters for this design on the suit. She was glad to see that the suit fit his body well (wink wonk).

“Hey, uh, do you need some clothes? Assuming that you’ll be staying with me for awhile,” Y/N didn’t wait for him to answer and walked over to her dresser, opening a drawer to find some sweatpants she had barely worn. She tossed the pair along with a oversized shirt, not before mentioning that the shirt was optional. Both were surprised that Y/N easily went back to her normal self after everything that happened.

Peter muttered a “thanks” after changing into the clothes Y/N had given him. After Y/N had cleared the bed of tissues, she pulled out two blankets from her closet and offered the bigger one to Peter. Peter, being Peter, declined the offer and persisted until Y/N threw the blanket at Peter’s face.

As the two teens settled on the bed, they didn’t how close they were until they both turned to ask if the other was comfortable. Y/N and Peter’s noses were close to touching and Y/N’s back was practically on Peter’s chest. Peter’s eyes flitted down to Y/N’s lips and Y/N returned the favor.

Y/N turned away before anything could happen. “Look, I know that we are meant to be with each other...but I feel like we’re rushing this. I mean, I found out that you’re Spider-Man, you found out I’m Tony Stark’s daughter, and, last but definitely not least, we found out that we’re each other’s soulmates in one day.”

“Yeah no I understand. Do you just want to sit here or..?” Peter searched her face for any indication of an answer.

That would be nice, Y/N looked at him and gave an awkward smile.

It wasn’t long before Peter went to check on Queens yet again. He promised to wash and give back the clothes that she had let him borrow.

Be safe out there. Not that I care or anything, Y/N thought. Peter could practically see the shit-eating grin that Y/N was wearing as he swung his way back to Queens.

Yeah, ok. And Happy is my best friend.

Shut up, Parker.

taglist: @mega-bi  @sadstrudel @ispiderdudei

[chelseas-log-blog]

hey guys, im back. im 22 . and im still the same piece of shit i was when i was 15.. but thats not true because of grown and learned so many new things. but yes im still a piece of shit.. just not the same. im hoping to use this blog just for me. and for what i need to say and put out there and for me to be able to think yup youve lived that feeling. and its time to move on, its okay to feel things. but you cant stay on that moment forever. or even, no moment. or no person should affect you so much that you cant move on in 5 minutes or be yourself again in a day.  chelsea, i know that your jounrey has been hard. i have lived and been there thrpough every moment you have been through. i am the only person who was never left yourself. i know its hard. and you are constantly fighting thatt giving up feeling. i know you are fighting that motivation too. but after everything major in your life arent you proud of what you know you thought you couldnt do but did? arent you proud that you have been alive for 22 years and througgh some major more bullshit than someone who didnt deserve it. or did.the world may know imshit and may that my thoughts are bad too,. i know its not good enough to think of all the good. i know that a lot of it has been worse and truly more unlivable than livable. but you fucking did it. and you are trying to live that livable life that makes you want to continue to live it. but you gotta do more and not focus so much of your thought or your energy on what just happened but rather than what is going to happen and wht is possible. belive me. dont think that you cant but believe and see and feel that you fucking can!

[suteshiro]

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

Open, kinda? My closet is built into a wall and one of the sides has like, shelves I use often so it’s just open for accesibility

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

Nope! I got nerfed, honestly. I’d look lovely with freckles

(3) Can You Whistle?

Hahaha nope,

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

Night of Fire bc im listening to an eurobeat mix while working on a school assignment skjfvnskjfv last song I Willingly listened to is The Hearse by matt maeson which fucking slaps

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

Probably purple!

(6) Relationship Status.

Single

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

18 celsius/64 fahrenheit. pretty average but for some reason im cold

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Nope! I woke up feeling wonderfully actually

(9) How Many Followers?

404. Very nice number

(10) Zodiac Sign.

I’m a scorpio and a dragon :3

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

Brown!

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

I do not, though I used to and might start again, who’s to say

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

Not rlly. I shower listening to music and I have a lot of trouble singing along to things im hearing for some reason skfnvskfjb

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

I’m too embarrassed to say publicly which one im reading now skjvnskfjb i kinda wanna read some cute cheesy romance in the nearby future

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

I grabbed the first lotr book and gottt

“Ah,” said Ted, “ you hear them, if you listen. But if I wanted to listen to old lady tales and childish legends, I’d stay home”

(Translated a bit roughly bc my physical books are mostly in spanish

(16) Favourite Anime?

You cant ask me thatt skjfvnklabmksfjb It might be Violet Evergarden? It’s the only anime that’s really made me cry

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

I think I cried in front of my mom at some point recently while pretending i wasnt crying

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

Notebooks skfnskfsnb I just think they’re neat

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

havent Lunched yet, dont scold me

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

I’m rarely in cars and they’re usually not mine

(21) Favourite Animal?

Coatimundis pretty...... and adorable

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

Nope

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

I try to go to bed a bit before midnight but im needy and like talking to my friends so its usually around 2am

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

Nope! I p much never do that

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Both have their pros! I think I tend towards pools bc as a rule they dont rlly have like, annoying consequences

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

@yournewapartment​​ keeps popping up in my dash with good advice and nice stuff and i appreciate it

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

Bottled waterr the tap water in my building is weird and doesnt seem very safe to drink and by now i hate the taste skjvfnkjn

(28) What Makes You Happy?

My friends, comedy shows, reading good fanfiction, writing fanfiction, drawing my characters, reading about others’ characters, giving gifts, the smell of roses, fairy pokemon, butterflies-

I like being happy

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

Im not really a Keeps Gifs That Convey Emotions kinda guy

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

Depends a lot skjvfnskfjvn my brain keeps switching

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

Very hard questions,,, I think I tend towards dogs bc they’re like me. Big. Excitable. Needy.

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

Purble.,......

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

PlayStation

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

I have been in the ocean before and idk how much i liked it but sure id do it again. A lake sounds fun!!

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

I practice it!

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

Red

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

I’m not sure what exactly this is asking

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

I like saving money skjfnvksjv I rarely think of things to spend it on

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Ye! There’s a bag I use to keep my chargers in it when im outside. it has flower pictures. very pretty

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

Love Live,,,,, and now my character Curiosity bc @zuramaru​​ is an angel and running a campaign he’s in and we played yesterday and holy shit theres a lot going on

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

Oh yes!! this one time I was in a place absolutely full of butterflies and I caught one between my cupped hands and it stayed there when I opened them and it was a wonderful experience

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

Ya,, I do the fawning thing so I tend to agree with other people by default, lest we have any kind of conflict

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Oh yes, most of the dreams I remember are. bizarre

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

Yeah!!! Only done it twice but it was a blast

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

Inside Out fucking got to me

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Peanuts,,, I don’t like sunflower seeds. I mean they’re tasty but. Too much effort for too little reward

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Uuuuh, FOB probably

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

Not really, but also yes? I have a few things I absolutely refuse to put in my mouth

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

Perhaps? I’m not very hard to wake up but I can sleep through a lot of stuff

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

Nah I fucking love it

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

Yes!! I think I would actually like to become a writer. Not sure tho

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

Yea but only when I’m really into it. Like, usually I’m listening to stuff and the volume tends to low but then there’s this One song and I turn it up all the way until it’s over

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Wrap presents, I’ve never carved pumpkins before skjfvnskjfv seems like a hassle and I’d feel bad for not making it look nice

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Haven’t you noticed (I’m a star) from Steven Universe

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Winterr

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now?

Choclet........

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

Here you go!

(58) What Is Your Gender?

Solarian!

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

I’m a tea guy!

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

I’m helping translate an entire thing about the way emails work, its a bit of a hassle skjfvnsf

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

Uuuuh I’ve been questioning but im mlm and also into nb people

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

Yeah! Makes me feel accomplished and sexy

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

SYLVEON SYLVEON SYLVEON

(64) Favourite Social Media?

Absolutely Tumblr. Unless you count Discord as a social media

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

I don’t use. Instagram. But sure they’re neat

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

A little. Usually when I travel I’m either at a place I hate or at a place where I don’t have commodities I do have at home skjfnskjfb so I miss my room

(67) Are You A Virgin?

Yup

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Uuuh I’m using a Head & Shoulders shampoo I believe? WIth no conditioner bc my hair is real short now and conditioner tends to feel weird

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

Well you see I would choose the crappy motel but 60 bucks seems a bit unattainable so sure, let’s stay in my car

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

Nope, father is Dead

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

I’m not interested in anything, honestly

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

“If I could make days last forever, if words could make wishes come true, I’d save every day like a treasure and then, again, I would spend them with you”

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

There’s this like. Really nice honey color

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

I loved swinging! I still do but I’m. Self conscious about my weight and scared of breaking something

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Some pastries for breakfast

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

20B wives, My sweet angel is a real angel, BitLife, Buriedbornes, Cardinal Quest 2, Crazy 8, Egg Inc, FarmVille 2, Fire Emblem Heroes, Gardenscapes, Get bigger! Mola, Homescapes, Human Resource Machine, Kept Man Life, Love Live, Mermaid Evolution, My Little Star VIP, Piano Tiles 2, Plague Inc, Pocket City, Pokémon GO, Puzzledom, SmithStory, Soul Knight, Tap Knight, Tower Breaker

To be clear quite a few of these stay there completely untouched

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

What kind of question is this???

I mean I don’t know CPR but if I could yeah???

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

… listen,

right now ive only been on my computer for like an hour or two but yeah ive done that,

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

I don’t think so?

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

Yyyyes and no. I’m a bit awkward but I like people

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

Oh!! I wear this really pretty crown shaped ring but idk where I left it

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed closed closed I haaate when my bedroom door is open

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

Talk with friends, make some tea, read? I haven’t done a lot today skvnskjvn

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

Comfy shirt and sweatpants

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

What’s a beauty?

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

uuuh both? hard to answer??

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

Well, we’ve already clarified what I have on my phone skjfnskjfb

THe only games I know I have on console are Mortal Kombat Armageddon, Devil May Cry 3 special edition, and Okami. Oh! And God of War. I think at least the first and second. Were there more than two?

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

Nah

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

I don’t like fizzy drinks, they make my throat hurt

But Fanta is nice

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

Melodic voices singing, the rain, absentminded humming, small clicking noises...

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

Jeans! I have very few but I’ve grown fond of them. Used to wear yoga pants pretty exclusively before

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

Gorgeous, of course

Skjvnskfjvn I’m still wearing the clothes I used to sleep

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

Ghibli movies

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

A star map on my back!

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

Right now I think that’s John Wolfe. But I like quite a few

[dass-ist-egal]

This is fucking retarded.

I asked my grandfather to buy me some cookies because I’m hungry and wearing pjs and he told me that it was his anniversary with my grandmother and I should congratulate her, it is a special day sure but it doesn’t concern me and i have nothing to do with it so i told him I wouldn’t do it because again it doesn’t concern me, he told me that i had no manners and that i was going to suffer if i ever left, he told me that i believe that I’m right but im not and he’s concerned about it but MOST OF THE TIMES HE ACTS AS IF HE WERE MENTALLY RETARDED, I always do research before talking about anything so i almost never get anything wrong and fuck he doesn’t even know how to solve a problem as simple as to call a taxi, he told me that i was the only teenager that complains about this country and i told him that i was irrefutable and that i asked people to tell me why this country is “good” several times but they could never “win” the argument and so he told me that nobody wanted to get in trouble so they just ignored me and that i never greeted people on the street and don’t even want to touch some things because according to me they are dirty.

THEY ARE FUCKING DIRTY AND IF I BARELY KNOW A PERSON THERE IS NO FUCKING REASON FOR ME TO SAY ANYTHING TO THEM, I SHOULDN’T EVEN HAVE TO LOOK AT THEM IF I DIDN’T WANT TO.

I’ve seen cockroaches crawling on the door handle and in the shelves so why would i want to touch those things?

When i was in school there nobody went around the classroom greeting every single classmate just for the sake of doing it like they do here, they just went in, sat down and said hi to the guys that were next to them and that was it.

He told me that I’m here and not there and you know the drill but I don’t want to act like a person from this country, according to google re standard iq is so low it’s basically mild retardation, no kidding i looked for that multiple times and a friend of mine told me that he saw it too, he told me that “god” was watching and that i would neer l ave and that I’d be as stupid as him when i was his age, FUCK EVERYBODY IN THIS GODDAMNED COUNTRY BELIEVES THEY ARE FUCKING ORACLES OR CLAIRVOYANTS.

Then my grandmother who always treats me badly in the mornings and who never agrees at first and BASICALLY ACTS LIKE AN TSUNDERE/OLD/BITCH TOLD ME THAT I’D BE IN JAIL.

WHY THE FUCK WOULD I GO TO JAIL?

That’s not all, she told me that I’d be in jail there which is even more retarded than being in jail here.

I asked her what evil did i do and she told me that i was lazy to which i reply with: do lazy people go to jail?

To which she said yes.

That’s not how the fucking world works you moron.

She told me that i believe that i am far superior than the people in this country (which is true because by far most of them are fucking animals) but they’ve achieved something and I haven’t to which I replied by sayng that their achievements were mediocre (which is fucking true) and that a person who cleans the floor in norway makes more money than my mother, who has studies a career in a university, asisted various courses and worked on her field for over tweny years, she told me that then I’d have to work to get there but i told her that with the wages of this country I’d never make it in time.

I want to invest in real state but if i were to buy a house and rent it I wouldn’t make shit in a first world country, if i made a minimum wage eah month with that it would probably be enough to buy food but not to buy food and pay for electricity bills.

Once she gets paid i hope i can leav for i hate this country and everyone in this house.

When i think of killing myself i always think of them suffering, I’d want them to feel just as miserable as I feel.

I fucjing hate them and can’t help but to think of killing myself every time some stupid shit like this happens.

She just brought me the cookies whike saying thatt this was the last time she would ever buy them even though SHE’S SAID THAT LIKE FIFTY FUCKING TIMES.

And I don’t think she’s forgotten but rather she’s just A FUCKING EIGHTY SOMETHING YEAR OLD TSUNDERE.

I want to fucking die.