#( why does this feel like a cozy romantic fantasy movie )

[drachcnblut]

Tiernan listened intently as Harriet spoke, her voice gentle and tinged with vulnerability. He could sense the weight of her words, the way she hesitated before revealing pieces of herself that seemed long hidden away. There was something about her quiet strength, the way she cautiously let him in, that stirred a protective instinct within him. It wasn’t often he felt this way around someone he had just met, but with Harriet, there was a sense of ease that surprised him.

As she shared her childhood story about collecting rocks, a soft smile curved on his lips. He could almost picture a younger Harriet, carefully tucking away her treasures, each stone a small beacon of hope or a symbol of a dream. There was a purity in the simplicity of it that resonated with him.

He nodded as she spoke, offering her a reassuring smile. “I don’t think it’s silly at all” he said, his tone gentle and sincere. “Sometimes the simplest things hold the most meaning. It’s like… a way to carry a piece of where you’ve been with you, even when you’re somewhere else.” His eyes softened as he added “I think that’s a kind of magic in itself.”

The word “magic” slipped out before he could stop it, but he didn’t dwell on it, hoping she wouldn’t pick up on the deeper truth hidden within. Instead, he turned his attention to the comforting atmosphere of the bakery, letting the warm scents of cinnamon and sugar fill the space between them.

With a quiet resolve, Tiernan stood and approached the counter, where an assortment of freshly baked goods was displayed. The cinnamon rolls, perfectly golden and generously drizzled with icing, caught his eye immediately. They looked warm and inviting, much like the connection he felt growing between him and Harriet.

“Two cinnamon rolls, please” he said to the baker, his shy nature making the simple task feel a bit more daunting than it should. But as he glanced back at Harriet, who was seated by the window with that small, hopeful smile on her lips, he felt a wave of calm wash over him.

As the baker placed the rolls in a small box, Tiernan couldn’t help but think about how different his life was compared to hers. Draigh, the hidden village near Ben Nevis, was a world apart from the life Harriet knew. It was a place shrouded in mystery and guarded secrets, where dragonriders like him lived in the shadows of the mountains, their existence unknown to the outside world. It was a life that demanded silence and caution, and though he had grown accustomed to it, there were moments — like this one — where he wished he could share more of himself with someone who seemed to understand him so well.

Tiernan returned to the table with the cinnamon rolls in hand, placing the box between them. “I hope these are as good as they smell” he said with a smile, his green-blue eyes catching the light as they met hers. “I thought we could share them while we… continue our conversation.”

He hesitated for a moment, feeling the weight of all the things he couldn’t say. But then he remembered Harriet’s words, her willingness to try opening up, and it gave him the courage to do the same — at least in the ways he could.

“I’ve always believed that places like this, moments like this, are worth remembering” Tiernan said, carefully choosing his words. “Maybe it’s not about finding the right place or the right time, but about being open to the possibility that something special can happen anywhere, with anyone.”

He offered her a piece of the cinnamon roll, the sweet aroma filling the small space between them. “And maybe,” he added with a shy smile, “we’ll find that lucky rock on our way back. A little piece of today to keep with us, no matter where we go.”

She felt a warmth blossom in her chest at Tiernan’s words, his sincerity disarming her in a way she wasn’t used to. It was strange, this connection with someone she had only just met, and it made her feel both comforted and uneasy at the same time. She liked the way he looked at her, like she was someone worth getting to know, but that’s what scared her, too.

As they stepped into the bakery, the comforting scent of cinnamon and sugar wrapped around her, and for a moment, she allowed herself to just be. She watched Tiernan’s eyes light up with that grin that made him look much younger, and it made her want to smile, too. Really smile, the kind she hadn’t let herself in a long time.

His question hung in the air, and she found herself pondering it, turning it over in her mind. Did they end up where they needed to be? Harriet wasn’t sure. She’d stopped believing in things like fate a while ago, but there was something about this moment, about Tiernan, that made her wonder.

“Maybe,” she said softly, her voice almost lost in the warmth of the bakery. “Maybe we do end up where we need to be, even if we don’t understand why at first.” She met his gaze, feeling that flutter of something in her chest again, and quickly looked away. “Or maybe it’s just that we find the good things when we stop trying so hard to find them.”

The table by the window looked inviting, and she nodded when he gestured to it, her heart doing that strange little flip as he pulled out a chair for her. She hadn’t let herself get close to anyone in a long time, not since … well, since things had gone wrong. But there was a softness in Tiernan, a gentleness that made her want to believe that maybe, just maybe, it was okay to let someone in.

She sat down, folding her hands in her lap to keep them from trembling. “I think you’re right,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “There’s something special about this place … about today.” She hesitated, then added, “It’s been a long time since I felt … like this.”

There was so much she wasn’t saying, so much she was holding back, but she hoped he could understand that it wasn’t because she didn’t want to share—it was because she wasn’t sure how. “I’m not very good at … uhm ... opening up,” she admitted, her gaze fixed on the table. “But I’d like to try, if that’s okay.”

The words felt heavy, vulnerable, but she meant them. There was a part of her that wanted to keep him at arm’s length, to protect herself from whatever pain might come, but another part - a quieter, softer part - wanted to see where this could go, even if she didn’t know where it would lead.

Quietly sighing, Harriet looked up from the table, a small, shy smile tugging at her lips as she searched for something to share, something light to ease the tension she felt inside. “You know,” she began, her voice a bit stronger now, “when I was little, I used to collect rocks. Not gemstones or anything special, just … ordinary rocks I found on walks. I’d keep them in a little box under my bed, and each one had a story. I’d pretend they were tiny pieces of places I’d never been, like bits of a faraway mountain or the shore of a hidden beach.”

She glanced at Tiernan, feeling a little silly but also oddly comforted by the memory. “I guess it was my way of dreaming about places beyond where I was. Even now, I still find myself picking up a rock every now and then, just to see if it feels … right.”

Harriet chuckled softly, her cheeks flushing with the confession. “It’s silly, I know, but I’ve always thought that if you find the right one, it might bring you a little luck.” She paused, then added with a gentle smile, “Maybe we’ll find one today, on our way back. A little piece of this place to remember it by.”

[amourdivine]

୨ ♡ ୧ WHAT WOULD IT BE LIKE TO DATE THEM?   ઉ

Hello lovelies, welcome to another PAC! This is mostly an intuitive reading about what it'd be like to date the person on your mind. This can work for a crush, a friend or someone you know and are romantically interested in - it does not work for celebrities or strangers. If you liked this reading, please consider tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.comvia paypal! xo ♡

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HOW TO CHOOSE YOUR PILE.  take a few deep breaths and look at each picture separately. see which one brings you to a feeling, a place or a memory. take your time and feel free to come back to it later!

PILE 1

I feel nostalgic. You may be asking about an almost lover, someone you never really got off the ground with. Something failed. A failed talking stage, someone moved away, someone chose something or someone else. Maybe a childhood best friend who never looked at you in the same way, but the longing never really left, did it? Perhaps you’re asking about a same sex relationship and the other person is attracted to a different gender than yours.

You probably (still) love this person and your heart aches with what could’ve been, but the truth of it is that you always loved them more. If you were dating, you’d be left with the bittersweet feeling that there has to be more for the both of you… that maybe this isn’t enough, that maybe they don’t love you enough. Insecurities could arise, tears pricking at your eyes. You could feel like you’re too much and not enough for them, simultaneously.

The truth of this realization would be painful, but it would set you free. You’d finally understand why you were never meant to be with this person in the first place. Sometimes when we get what we want, we find out it isn’t what we need. If the two of you dated, you’d realize they’re not all that and that maybe you always deserved more than what they could offer. It’d be a painful realization, because none of your fantasies came true. After all, they were just fantasies about this person… and the unrequited love was best left that way… unrequited. 

It reminds me of a quote I saw a couple of weeks ago. When you find out you’re on the wrong train, you get off immediately. Don’t waste your precious time taking the train which will lead you to the wrong destination.

PILE 2

There is calm here. A lot of peace and understanding. I don’t know if either one of you would be ready for this love, somehow. It sounds like someone could still be stuck in a chaser-runner dynamic, maybe one of you feels like love has to be earned, that love has to hit hard and violently. Maybe chaos feels safer than, well, safety. I also heard “the calm before the storm”.

Either way, this relationship would teach you calmness, tranquility. It would teach you the gentleness of routine, of self-control and discipline. This is not the kind of whirlwind romance people speak of in movies, but this is the kind of steady, strong love that builds over time. Very strong Saturn energy. Reliable, firm. There is nothing unpredictable or unstable about it – even though some people fantasize about the kind of love that sweeps them off their feet, this relationship would ground you like a tree growing from its deep roots.

“Soulmates are not born, they’re made”, it may be something that resonates with this pile. You’d learn about each other and stick through thick and thin. It isn’t the kind of flashy, ultra romantic love that’s seen on Tiktok or Instagram. There is something beautiful and quiet about it, like a safe haven, a cozy cabin in the woods where you go when you need to clear your mind. It is wise and soulful, something like a dead language spoken between only two people. 

PILE 3

I always think of Romeo & Juliet when The Lovers comes to mind. Not in a tragic way. This is the kind of relationship where two people compliment each other. Their differences might make things rough, but that’s where they grow. You are too different and too similar at once, you challenge and learn in each other’s presence because you are almost like two sides of the same coin. That can be amazing, but it can be really difficult if neither are willing to compromise or listen.

This relationship would require maturity. It’d be fun, but daring. Dating them could be amazing only if you are on the same page about your goals, desires and feelings. A lot of communication is required, but the love is there. The intensity, the longing stares and the ache to be with one another is far too real to be forgotten. Even if it didn’t last for long, dating them would be something like once in a lifetime. This pile may resonate with the concept of a divine counterpart. For you, it’s something deeper than a soulmate, almost. 

There’s a ride and die energy to it as well. You’d do everything together, for better or worse. This is the confidant, the best friend and the sensual lover all in one. If not handled carefully or maturely, as I mentioned, it can backfire. Remember that the lovers also appear in The Devil card, so it’s important to approach your love in a pure, honest and genuine way in order to benefit from everything this relationship has to offer you. The choices you make in regards to this person matter.

PILE 4

Lonely, it’d be lonely. Dating them would leave you more than just unsatisfied. This person would abandon you halfway. They’d make promises they cannot keep, based on insincere and vapid feelings. They’re good at crafting illusions and would likely change their mind – shallow, impressed by meaningless things.

Dating them would be a lesson – unfortunately not in a happy way. You’d enter this relationship as a page and leave as a hermit, much more aware of your own surroundings, of your habits and inner self. However, it would be isolating and depressing to go through so much pain for so little joy. If you are not involved with this person, chances are you should be grateful that things didn’t work out. The benefits wouldn’t be worth it in the long run. You can go through this journey of self-discovery without all the pain this person would put you through.

I see puddles, I see crying. Sad playlists and the word ‘lonely’ keeps playing in my head. Although they may have seemed promising in the beginning, like a prince charming, like a fairytale come true, this relationship would be nothing but disappointment, deceit and heartbreak. They can’t even compare to the fullness of your heart and the love you are willing to give. This person only knows selfishness and you are best away from them.

amourdivine 2021 - 2024 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content!

DISCLAIMER. tarot is a divination tool, it’s not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i don’t take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings. be mindful ♡

[snobgoblin]

I have just been extremely chatty lately so anyway yapping to a character prompt part 3

1. How do they celebrate their birthday?

he usually just treats himself by shopping at red street. he would invite people but he doesn't really have friends

2. Who is the most important person in their life?

himself if I'm honest but whatever partner he may get definitely becomes the most important person to him

3. What to they wear when they're just at home hanging out?

it swings wildly between "he wears the most expensive outfit he owns just for funsies" and "he wears basically nothing because of texture issues"

4. What is their house like?

you've seen the shop! it's that. with a cozy upstairs with lots of pillows. very Howl's Moving Castle esque decor going on in there too

5. Any pets?

eventually Faunus, yeah! he tries very unsuccessfully to lure pigeons and stuff to him with pumpkin bread. he's definitely an animal lover and tries to pet anything

6. What will always make them smile?

things that bring him comfort. warm bread, little trinkets, and eventually, his friends

7. What will always make them cry?

if you ever make him feel like you don't like him he will get mad and then cry about it later

8. What's their favorite movie (presuming they life in a world with movies, if not, what would be their favorite movie)?

I watch the same 5 movies on loop so I'm not sure 😭 I'll say he's a ghibli kind of guy

9. Favorite book?

erm I don't read so idk but he loves reading up on mythology and magic and things like that

10. Do they get along with their parents?

despite feeling hurt by Mercurio they're definitely close. that's the reason WHY he's so mad at his dad for leaving- he loves being around him. his relationship with his mom is negative but nearly nonexistent, they hardly see each other

11. If you could put them into a different fictional universe, where would they go?

in my universe GET OVER HERE (I have fallen in love with him)

12. Favorite holiday?

he freaking loves the Winter Solstice bro, like he hates the cold but he loves the closeness that comes with it and the over the top decorations

13. Tattoos?

nope!

14. What was their first kiss like?

awkward 😭 but passionate. buddy tried his best but he is painfully socially awkward

15. Have they ever lost somebody they loved?

yes, his aunt Capra. it destroyed him

16. They find a genie and are granted three wishes, what do they wish for, and why?

1) he wishes for someone to be obsessed with him. he is extremely lonely and feels so much love that has nowhere to go, and his heart is so empty he needs something to fill it. 2) he would probably want his aunt back and 3) he wishes to be rich for personal reasons but also so his dad will quit his job and stay home with him (that's not how that works 😭 he loves what he does)

17. They're stranded on an island and can only have 4 items and one companion, who and what do they bring?

he brings Asra and doesn't have to worry about the other 4 items because Asra will portal through the water and get them to safety. er cheeky answer erm Asra brings a wand, a cup, a sword, and a pentacle

18. What's a quote (not from their universe), that you associate them with?

I had to google "quotes" to get this 💀 I think this one's fitting "be so good they can't ignore you" -Steve Martin

19. Any romantic interests?

too many

20. What kind of accent do they have?

it's hard to say because they would all be speaking a language I do not speak. (of course the devs say they're all fantasy languages but we can assume they would at least be similar to real life areas and languages) he would sound like a native Italian speaker for sure, where Nadia, Julian, and Lucio, might not

21. What is their most prized possession?

he has a couple... his rings are probably up there. he never takes them off

22. Have they ever stolen anything?

only a body!

[pomefioredove]

Wahhh I love your writings so so so much and you absolutely deserve 500 and more ToT seeing your posts always makes my day!! I saw the match-up event and knew I had to join, it'll be my first time trying one of those!

It is kinda hard to describe myself... Which I guess says something about me? I'm a total homebody, finding comfort in solitude and the sort of freedom that comes with being able to express myself, by myself, with no restraint. But even then, there's nothing I don't love about the bustling nighttime, basking in the sort of romantic air of the evening as I admire the city lights and the ambience of energy.

I'm the type of person that finds myself in people. For better or for worse, my presence is determined by those I choose to be around... So overall I'm a big people pleaser and am kind of starved for good friendships and affection, having always had a hard time keeping connections or finding people that truly want to be with me, which in turn makes me a bit of a loner, I suppose... I do truly yearn though lol, so the want for connection is still there, raging within. It's almost a painful sort of pining, because I never hold a grudge.. Even if someone does wrong by me, I will always be ready to welcome them again with open arms. I'm fiercely loyal, so I long to have people reciprocate that.

I adore anything that keeps my mind going and gives me that feeling of satisfaction and indulgence... I would say I find that feeling in my passion for art, writing, and reading... analysing my favorite movies and literature, getting to notice little things about the people around me and storing them in the back of my mind as little anecdotes I can smile about. Putting myself in the shoes of others, letting my imagination go wild— that small balcony full of potted plants is so beautiful and cozy, I wonder what the interior of the home is like, then... Small, full of zen, with warm lights? That person on the sidewalk, waiting for the bus with headphones on, they look like they would like jazz, or maybe something more upbeat?

Im also a dreamer, I guess I can describe it as such haha. Im a hopeless romantic by heart, yet sometimes I find myself feeling a twinge of apprehension at the thought of truly being in a relationship... Maybe it's because it's uncharted territory, or it's because that "dreaming" side of me has that sort of "prince charming" fantasy that I've always wished for, even on a more realistic level. But even then, I know I can be patient and let time do it's thing while I focus on bettering my own future, and finding happiness and comfort in myself in the meanwhile.

I feel like maybe I've made this a bit too long haha.,,, take your time, and have a wonderful day! 🩷🩷

I match you with 𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐮𝐬 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐚

anon I hope that you were purposefully trying to get him. I think you might actually be his soulmate oh my god

The First Impression:

Do you believe in love at first sight? Malleus does.

The connection is immediate. He's drawn to you like a moth to a flame, and conversing with you only enchants him more. Perhaps you bump into each other somewhere in the dead of night, or maybe you're just classmates, either way he simply knows.

Why He Fell:

Malleus soon finds himself purposefully seeking out your company, wanting to get closer but not sure how. This whole "friendship" thing is quite new to him, after all, and he doesn't want to scare you off.

There's no telling what exactly it is that makes him fall in love, but he falls, and he falls hard. He relishes in every moment you spend together, whether it's talking about your shared passion for the arts, or listening to you describe dreams. Your perspective on life is so... fascinating to him, he can simply never get enough of it. Your attention to detail, your appreciation of the little things, your ceaseless curiosity and active imagination, the care you feel for strangers... You quite literally change his world view.

Perhaps he's not exactly a prince charming, but he's close enough.

The Relationship:

There's a sense of understanding between the two of you when it comes to your loneliness. Later on, Malleus will question if he could tell that you felt as isolated as he did when he first saw you, if that was what drew him closer. But he doesn't put much thought into it. You enchanted him, and that's enough of a reason.

Though, perhaps, in the end, it's that shared loneliness that drives you together again and again. Your fierce loyalty, your craving for love and affection. You make each other feel safe and secure, which is all Malleus could really ask for at the end of the day.

He truly grows into himself during the course of your relationship, becoming a more stable, caring, and emotionally intelligent version of himself. You truly bring out the very best in him, and he can only hope he does the same for you.

There are awkward moments, of course, being two people that have no prior relationship experience. There's miscommunication, the occasional bruised ego, but there's truly nothing that could tear you apart. Malleus is devoted, reliant on his loved ones in such a way that perfectly mirrors your loyalty, and the both of you are quick to forgive and talk and move on. Probably the healthiest relationship to ever healthy.

He absolutely adores you from beginning to end.

[regalbois]

This just an update, like a lil journal entry. I'm not constantly insane no worries, so what i have actually been doing recently outside of that is writing Penguin/Riddler and Catwoman/Penguin stuff. They're my own versions of them. I really like to consider Selina and Edward in a sort of duality, where Selina is more interested in sex and money as opposed to love, but she still does genuinely like Oswald and she's not desperate, she's just in a mood for some fun u kno, and that's valid of her. I think Oswald loves her a little, but in the way that he's fucking her and spending time with her, so he has to love her at all to feel capable of doing that. Edward on the other hand really does love Oswald quite a lot. Not to say "he doesn't care about the money" because he definitely does adore Oswald's penchant for fashion and general extravagance, it's very very charming to him. But he's far more warm and romantic to Oswald than Selina generally is, and he's definitely looking for a relationship. He'd really like to settle down with the old bird, be all warm and cozy and comfortable. Having lived his early life in poverty, the security of Oswald's riches is appealing to him, as is Oswald's ability to protect him physically.

I also have a few more Simpsons Burnsmithers fics I'd like to follow through with. Main one I thought of a few nights ago is Burns performing a wellness check on Smithers. I also want to follow up on the "wild west au", which was going to be an entire story but I might just do a one-shot or a handful of chapters. But before doing so, I have a handful of Westerns I'd like to watch, and also return to RDR2. My grandparents watched a lot of Western movies and shows as I was growing up and they're still watching the painful as fuck "Tales of Wells Fargo" and "Laramie", so I have been getting injected recently and I'd like to experience some "good" westerns so I don't feel completely ill writing the Bsmits thing. I'd only like to keep it historically accurate and check the vibes, which is why it won't be a full-fledged story because writing historical fiction fanfiction is honestly painful and not super worth the effort?? Only in that it just takes up a lot of my time and there are other things I'd rather write u kno

Ofc I've still been reading a lot too, I discovered author Kazuo Ishiguro, who wrote "The Remains of the Day", and I look forward to reading more of his works because they're very emotionally compelling and astoundingly well-written. Likewise with Vladimir Nabokov, as I did get around to reading "Lolita", which has played into some of my recent fics. And I'm also re-reading asoiaf, which is one of my favorite series of all time that I never talk about because the fans are fucking vile. Fic idea is blossoming from that series so I guess, given time and thought, I'll start working on that too.

Very very gradually I've also been working on one of my original stories. Set in my own fantasy universe, it is about an older knight being abused by his king; the knight falls in love with a fellow kingsguard and they escape together. There's a lot going on here and I hate world-building so I don't really talk about it because it's a character-driven story and as far as I can really tell people only want to hear about the lore that I don't like discussing. I'm rather proud of the world, really, but I just don't find conversation about it to be all that stimulating, and I don't find it useful when people take it upon themselves to pick apart something they don't truly understand. Anyway, this is like the 1 billionth draft of said story, so I'm just taking it sentence by sentence, and hopefully since the holiday madness is lightening up I'll have more energy to feel like writing more.

As for life stuff, it be what it do. I got my license and my car is fixed so I'm more alone now than before. I'd like to get a different job, but being sort of anti-social and incapable of forming bonds, it's not looking promising because I'm in a position I've worked very hard to achieve, one where people listen to me. Hopefully this coming year I can go back to college and select a painfully boring profession that will make me a lot of money 🫡 ciao

To end on a lighter note tho, i am getting some more Catwoman figures soon. Plus I have a Chun-Li and Beastars Louis on pre-order that I'm really excited for. I might also try to learn the trumpet. The real light of my life is my boyfriend, who I've been spending time with playing Final Fantasy 14 and watching some real good movies. He is also the cutie pie who got me into Batman, and I love him with all my little heart 💜🥺🤧 the end

[aidansplaguewind]

This is probably a weird confession and I’m not sure if you or any of Aidan’s fans do this but… this sort of “obsession” I have with him has led me to do multiple google research about his personal life, even his Q&A interviews just to get to know how he’s really like in real life (by the way he thinks, talks, behaves, etc.)

That said, we all know that his current partner is Camille, and I creep her page from time to time on instagram just to see if she has any new posts that has him in it.

One particular post that made me all the more curious is when she and Aidan stayed at what looks like a cabin on the edge of a mountain or hill, with their bed facing the floor-to-ceiling glass window that has a spectacular view of the outdoors. Seeing how romantic and gorgeous their place is, made me think of all the s3xual things and what wild night it must have been for Camille… just the thought of cuddling/sp00ning with Aidan in that cozy bed.

And to help me visualize him in bed, I’ve seen his s3x scenes from Still, Identity, and all his other shows /movies and I just imagine him being like that.

Also, if you google search aznude men and type his name on the search bar, you would see screen shots and videos of him naked. There were a couple shots from QAF that slightly shows his p3nis, and boy are they b i g . His stature also says it all, as his height is 1.75m which gives him an average of 6.2 inches.

Thoughts?

Well, anon, my blog is kind of dedicated to this man so yes of course I've seen every single one of his nude scenes. Lol Sorry, I don't mean to sound like a smart ass but I'm always the first one to be like, "YES YOU MUST WATCH EVERY SINGLE THING HE HAS EVER BEEN IN." I've even giffed several of those scenes, I just can't post them on Tumblr since the nude ban.

So yeah, my guess of 6 inches is based off what I've seen of him and my own personal experience with dicks and the many I've seen. (To be clear, I've seen far more than I've interacted with) I really don't think height has anything to do with penis size, though. And to be honest, he's pretty average in height. He's 5'9. I'd be more inclined to think body build has more to do with it because yeah, skinny boys usually have good sized dicks. I think that's why many thicker girls date skinny guys. In fact, I've heard many a thicker girl attest to it. I was once told, "They gotta be able to get it past the cheeks." And the bigger girls will know exactly what that means. 😉

Now, I've been obsessed with him for 9 years, so I have done my fair share of creeping. With that being said, there are some things I'd rather not think about. While I won't say anything against his partner, I also still have absolutely no desire to imagine him in bed with her. I'm just being straight with you.

I like knowing things about him. From the way he talks, to the things he likes. I've memorized his mannerisms. I can tell you which parts of his characters are HIM and not the character because I've seen him say or do the same things so much when he's just being Aidan. I've watched all of his sex scenes and yes, every damn one gets me hot and bothered. Even after 9 years and seeing them many, many times.

But I do not want to know about what he does in bed with his partner. He's a person, and he needs to keep some things to himself. But I also need to keep some things to myself. And since I know there isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I will ever have him, in my fantasies, at the very least, I'd like to keep him just to me. Seeing as how that is the only place I can have him at all. She's got him for real, so I can have him in my head.

You, however, are free to imagine and think about whatever your heart desires. And again, I don't mean to sound like a smart ass, (I feel like I always come off as a smart ass but I'm just kinda rough around the edges and I'm finding that the older I'm getting, the more blunt I'm getting), I'm just telling you how I feel.

[himitsu-luna]

Reaction

*ﾟ—☆ Nct 127 reaction to ice skating for the first time with their s/o *⋆

❉ Taeil

Taeil is super excited, even though he doesn't show it. He is always up to do anything with his s/o, and ice skating sounds so much fun.

But as soon as you two step on the icerink, he realizes there's a little problem in all of this: actually, neither of you know how to properly skate yet.

He wants to give you a security sense though, so he stands firmly on the ice, and his brain starts working. After skating a bit, he finds the perfect balance and learns how the dynamics on ice work.

He now perfectly and smoothly leads you by your waist with one of his hands.

He says you're doing great a million of times

When you two are already skating much better than when you entered the rink, he lets his hand go from your waist and gets away from you a little bit. You wonder why, but soon you give a big laugh, looking at him making a full heart at you with his arms, right in the middle of the rink, not ashamed of showing his love for you to everyone.

❉ Johnny

Johnny waited for this moment since you started dating. It's one of the topics of what he calls "The infinite list of things I want to do with Y/N"

But you arrive the rink, and he decides he wants to play with you a bit.

At first he pretends he doesn't know how to skate. And there you go, teaching him what you know, while supporting his giant heavy body

He pretends he is falling, making you squeal. But he doesn't make It to the ground. Instead, he straights his body and graciously skates around you, laughing, making you realize it was all a joke

You don't know if you want to yell at him or laugh at his mischivious yet cute smiling face

He surprises you even more, when he lifts you from the ice and twirl around with you in his arms.

When he puts you down, he gives you a little peck on the lips. You're blush not only because of the sudden kiss, but also because now everyone in the rink is looking at you

❉ Taeyong

Taeyong gets super excited because he knows you're also super excited

He would have everything prepared: extra coats, his camera (because he definitely will record you skating), maybe some medicament in case you two fall too much, his money, so he can take you to a cozy café after spending the day skating

You start skating holding hands. He wants to be sure you won't fall. After he sees you're really good at skating, he lets your hands go.

He really admires you, and he is impressed by how well you skate. He feels so warm and happy, because he is getting to know a new thing about you.

There's music playing, and he can't contain himself. You see him pulling some dance moves in the rink, and you laugh at how excited and cute he is.

He grabs your hands so you can dance together. You twirl around, roam the entire rink, and even if there's dozens of people around you, you're in your own universe, completely lost in happy and soft feelings

❉ Yuta

Yuta gets genuinely happy and opens his famous healing smile when he sees you all excited on your way to the icerink

He takes sooo much care of you. He makes sure your skates are firmly tied and that you're with lots of layers of warm clothes

He is attentive to the surroundings and watches the people who are skating around you, because he fears someone bump into you and you end up hurt.

He pulls you to him everytime someone gets too close, and when he does that, he doesn't lose the opportunity to steal a little kiss from you.

But he also enjoys your time together so much. He makes you laugh, plays with you, he wants to race with you. You feel your connection growing even more just by sharing this new moment together.

At the end of the date, he says he definitely want to do this with you until you get old, and you can't help feeling delighted by the thought of a whole life beside him.

❉ Doyoung

Doyoung looked forward your ice skating dating since the day you proposed it to him. He knows you're recently getting into ice skating, so he is excited

He wants everything to go smooth and perfect, so he even researches some cool techniques to use in the rink and impress you

At the rink, he skates a little bit while you're getting ready, to make sure he will do everything correctly

He rushes to you when he sees you entering the rink, and helps you until you get used to the slippery ice

Them he excitedly shows you everything he learned, his gummy smile never leaving his face

You tell him you're impressed by how much he knows, and he shyly confesses he made an extra effort to learn everything, because he knew you really liked skating and that it was important to you

You get very touched by his consideration, and give him a big hug. He gets startled yet happy, and doesn't hesitate in returning the hug, 100x warmer

❉ Jaehyun

Jaehyun's romantic side is activeated

He loves the idea of reenact these cute movie scenes he watched, in which the couples are all lovey dovey skating on ice

You enter the rink, and he can't stop smiling shyly, lost a bit in his own romantic fantasy

At first he doesn't speak much, but firmly holds your hand, while you two skate around the whole ring

Then you talk about a lot of things while skating: about your days, about life, about love. He also tells you some cute infame jokes from time to time, and he gets really proud of himself when he sees he can make you laugh so easily

At some point, he stops and puts himself in front of you. You look curious at him, as he adjusts the long scarf you have around your neck. You don't realize that he is slowly pulling you closer to him, until your faces are very close and you feel his lips on yours.

You're still flustered with this sudden cute action, as he grabs your hands and you start moving again, his dimples showing on the sides of his face.

❉ Winwin

Winwin and you step on the ring holding hands. Winwin conducts you through your waist, giving you some stability and a comforting touch

You tell him you want to try to skate by yourself, and he lets your hand go

He cannot stop smiling looking at you having fun. He is taking his time to engrave this sweet memory into his mind

His elegant figure sliding gracefully on the ice grabs the attention of everyone around him

But Winwin doesn't realize all the eyes on him. All he can see is you, only you, smiling cutely at him, all proud of your skating ability

For a second you turn your back to him, and when you turn around to face him again, you see him extending his arms in your direction, inviting you for a hug

You quickly go to him, landing onto his warm embrace, as he compliments you on how good at skating you are, and gives you a peck on your forehead.

❉ Jungwoo

The funniest and heartwarming date ever

Jungwoo enters the rink first, and starts to play immediately

Jungwoo is like "Look, look y/n!! Look at what I can do! Try to do it too! Try it!!", smiling widely at you

He is all cute and playful like a puppy, but you need to ask him to calm down, because he is so hyped up that you fear he can stumble and fall

He dares you to come and try to catch him, and you accept the challenge right away. You go to him, but he is faster than you. He dodges you and, you don't know how, he gets behind you.

You feel his arms wrapping around you, and he giving you a quick peck on the cheek

He calms down a bit after this, and just calmly enjoy your time together, talking and laughing while skating.

❉ Mark

The first thing you notice when you start skating is that Mark is really good at it, much better than you, you need to admit.

But you don't know he is actually thinking the same about you. He looks at you with proud eyes, complimenting you nonstop, and encouraging you to show everything you know

Feels like squishing you into a hug everytime you show him a trick, or when you cling on him trying to be more stable

Looking fondly at you, he casually says he really wants to take you to skate with his family and friends, and he doesn't realize how much this sentence makes you blush

He eventually gets distracted, stumbles on his own feet, grabs you and you end up falling together.

He is super worried, says sorry a billion of times, but gets relieved when but you start laughing, still laying on the ice. He starts giggling like crazy too, and you stay like this for a while. You stop laughing when he bends over you and steal a kiss from you, standing up quickly, smiling amazed by his own courage of doing that.

❉ Haechan

Haechan loves to see you all happy. It's the cutest thing ever to him

You expect him to tease you everytime you slip weirdly on the ice, but Haechan acts sweeter than normal

Everytime you stumble, he gets the opportunity to hold you tightly and say you're cute.

He does say things like "What would become of you without me?", but you don't even have time to reply, because he immediately say afterwards "Don't worry, I'll always be here by your side", getting you flustered and speechless

He genuinely takes care of you, and never lets you go. You skate with your arms linked for a long time, just enjoying the presence of each other

He thinks of how either chaotic and calm moments are so enjoyable when he lives them with you, and how you accept every side of him, as he brings your hand up so he can kiss it sweetly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

°• @najatheangel I'm so sorry it took me so long to write this for you, but here it's, finally hahaha I really hope you like it, and thank you so much for requesting <3

°• Masterlist

...

[drawing-way-outside-the-lines]

I need to learn more bout Andy so, A, D, N, and Y for him and B, E, A, U, T and Y for Nekaya if that's okay :)

Thank you so much! And of course it’s okay, I always love getting oc asks!💙 (I usually prefer to let them speak for themselves, but this one, I actually feel like answering on my own, I hope that’s okay?)

A. how does your muse show affection? Andy shows affection a lot like a small kitten/a cat does. He loves to cuddle, and in one way or another get as close with someone as possible. Stroking them here and there. Much like a cat would stroke themselves against someone to show love/ask for attention. Beside that he’s a huge gift giver, he has more than enough money, and he loves to shower people he love/cares for with things they need. So if you ever at some point expressed you needed/wanted something, and he feels like showing a bit of extra love, be sure you’ll get whatever you have been sighing for. Need a new winter jacket... -there you go! A new apartment? - Andy might just have your back! XD He never flashes his money around, so don’t take it that way, he simply would love to help where he can, rather than buying big celebrity mansions. Last but not least, he loves to just BE THERE. As a listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, the person to take you out when you want to dance the night away. He’s very affectionate without being too sticky, and loves to simply make everyone around him as happy/comfortable as possible. D. what is your muse’s ideal date? where / who with / etc? And here I realize I am robbing you from one of his usual cocky/flirty/shithead comments XD So I’ll have to owe you! Andyways.... he would definitely insist I make it clear that his “ideal date” depends a whole lot on whom he’s dating. An ideal date to Andy can be anything from literally sitting on the hood of a car, sharing junk food, watching the sun go down over the industrial part of town, to a night out with fine dining, or a romantic picnic. It all depends on the person he’s with. As for who his ideal date would be with... well... whomever he has a crush on this month! XD N. what is your muse like in bed? *Another cocky remark stolen* Oh dear! XD Where do I begin? He has a lot of stamina, and a lot of hormones, and barely anything is a taboo for him. So I guess, for some he will be a sexual fantasy come true, and for others he might be a handful/mouthful - pun fully intended! He’s good, he knows his way around, and he wont stop till you sing! Unless you tell him to, that is. However, he’s also extremely sweet and attentive. He doesn’t cross any lines on purpose, and specially if it’s with a new partner, he makes sure to read their body language extra carefully, and gently ‘poke lines’ before exploring them, so to speak. Y. does your muse get protective easily? Yes! Very easily, very protective! Are you about to walk down a flight of stairs? - be ready for the hen-mom to worry for your safety! Nah *chuckles* he’s not that bad at all, but he is protective when he cares for someone.

B. does your muse like flowers? which ones are their favourite? Nekaya loves flowers, but prefers them to be in the ground where they belong! That doesn’t mean you can’t bring her any if you would want to, she just prefers other tokens instead. Her favorite flowers are: Black Orchids, Belladonna and her number one - Odessa Calla Lily! E. does your muse like hugs? what are their hugs like? (I have no idea why all the text suddenly became small, but I can’t seem to fix it, and I refuse to start over... my apologies!) She loves hugs, or any form of embrace for that matter. Her hug is very warm, tight, but not too tight, it remains comfortable and breathable. A. how does your muse show affection? For Kaya it’s mostly about the little things. Such as doing the dishes for you, holding a door, offering a foot rub, cooking you dinner, making you a hot bath after a long day, watching your favorite movie or show with you, making a cozy fire, staying up all night when you need someone to talk to, fucking you hard with a strap on. You know, the little things. U.  has your muse had their heart broken? No. She hasn’t. But I’m sure she has broken a heart or two without knowing it. T. does your muse believe in true love? Yes! She very much does. And she also knows WHO it is. She just hasn’t told him yet, as she prefers to live out her crazy youth first. But it’s good to know he’s there. Y. does your muse get protective easily? Yes, and no. It’s a tough one really. She’s protective, but not easily, I suppose? She wont jump at the smallest danger, but if there’s a legit danger, she’ll jump in front of a train for the people she loves. She will however, stand up and defend the people she loves in a heartbeat!

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

hello :(( i'm here again because idk how tumblr erased the matchup you gave me so i thought i could try again with requesting a cake since they're open i guess, i'm so sorry but i really like your writing and your creative side, i wish to be this creative lmao

I'm 5'6ish, brown hair and light green eyes. i'm very chill and introvert, but if i'm comfortable with someone i open up more til the point to make the others laugh with what i'm saying. I don't trust people easily and i rarely tell my secrets to anyone. oh, i'm a pisces and an istj!

i don't play any kind of sport but three times a week i exercise at home just to stay active sometimes but my stamina is non-existent so yeah i give up easily.

i like following the rules and rebelling against them just give me anxiety. i always have earphones in even when i'm not listening to music. i enjoy staying in alone and i prefer talking about feeling through messages than in person.

i like drawing but i'm really bad at it. i'm not competitive at all, i'm mostly laid back all the time lmao.

i always see the beauty inside the others, i can't see flaws on them because i see them all on me.

i hate when people insist and i hate insisting too.

i enjoy a good book or a really good film from time to time, wrapped in a cozy blanket on my sofa. i also havd a cat who's the real love of my life, i could'n imagine myself without him.

Tumblr is this close 🤏 to catching these hands 😁

@likethebegin sorry that happened! Hope you enjoy this one ❤️

Romantic Matchup

Kenma Kozume

How yall met

You lost your cat 🥲

You were distraught

Went all out with hanging those missing posters

A week had went by and no luck

Until

Kenma approached you at school

He said he saw all your flyers

Then he pulled up a picture

“Is this your cat?”

He had found your cat!

The universe does love you after all

You went to his house after school to pick the cat up

But this hoe didn't want to leave 💀

He legit liked kenma more than you

So you stayed at his house for a bit

You guys really just played games and watched movies the whole time

Until your cat had chilled out and was ready to go home

You guys became really good friends after that day

And you started to go to his house more often

Occasionally bringing your cat

Then one day when you came over

He told you that he actually liked you a lot

Like more than friends

Lucky for him though, you liked him back

So you two started dating

And your cat had a new father :3

What they love about you

He loves how chill you are

He doesnt really like loud or crazy people

So he likes how he can just come to you for that good ol comfortable silence

He loves that your also an introvert

Ok mans here isnt the most extroverted person out there

So he gets your introverted tendencies

You bolth are very awkward in social situations…

Even when your together

But it’s ok

Yall can be awkward green beans together

He loves the fact that you see the beaty in everything

Poor boy right here can get a little insecure sometimes

But you just dont allow that

No insecure kenmas here

You always remind him how great he is

And give him VERY specific reasons why hes so great

We love validation on this blog

Favorite things to do together

JDSJUF

He loves to sit on the couch and watch movies with you

However

Its really you watching the movie while he plays his games

Unless its a movie he actually enjoys

All that matters is that your next to him

Or sitting on the couch while you both play a game on the tv

He likes spending time with you

Random HC

You have matching headphones

You guys try to work out together…

But fail miserably

You guys text

Like ALL the time

Phone addicts much

Your cat still low key likes kenma more than you 🥲🥲🥲

Astrology

Libra is an Air Sign and Pisces is a Water Sign. These two Signs together combine their heads and their hearts to solve all problems — a winning combination

The best decisions are made with both the emotions and the intellect; this relationship tends to be extremely flexible and progressive.

When problems occur, however, the communication breaks down between Libra and Pisces. Libra, who can at times be mentally manipulative, may give Pisces ‘the silent treatment.’

In this partnership there’s always an undercurrent of friction but neither partner will ever truly be the leader.

Although they may disagree often, their differences of opinion don’t last long. Their only real trouble may result from their tendency to slow down to the point of stopping when they get together.

When Libra and Pisces come together in a love affair, theirs is a congenial and even-tempered romance.

These two Signs are very compatible, making for a truly smooth-sailing love affair.

Both Signs are attuned to life’s aesthetic side, but they also have much to offer one another

When Pisces gets lost in a fantasy, Libra can apply that Libran proclivity for balance to help get Pisces back on track, and Pisces can return the favor by helping Libra see the beauty in love and empathy.

This is an honest partnership that values truth and harmony in itself and in the world.

Overall Aesthetic

Dazecore 🌙

Songs-

Brooklyn Baby - Lana Del Ray

Breezeblocks - alt j

Blow My Brains Out - Tikkle Me

Die For You - The Weekend

[merakiaes]

To begin with, I'm full of contradictions, utterly boring, very insecure and highly complicated. I would say my strongest personality traits are my kindness, calmness and sympathy. It's almost impossible to scare or upset me, because I always see the good in a person and recognize where anger, frustration and despair come from. There's no cruelty in me at all. I'm open and impartial towards everything and everyone, without any judgment or prejudice. I also have a calming/grounding effect on other people and animals, which is great because I honestly love all sorts of animals (I'm also a vegetarian because I refuse to intentionally hurt any animal). I'm always well-meaning and there to help others. I despise people who enjoy the suffering of others, just because they have the 'power' to. I'm very open-minded and I think that every opinion matters and that whatever someone has to say is important, at least to them and therefore for me. I will never ignore someone's sorrows and suffering and I try my hardest to help and comfort as best I can. But, even though I see the good in everything, I'm very insecure myself and have little love and understanding for myself. I have a very bad self-esteem and not a particularly positive self-perception, which mostly defines my actions. It makes me believe that I'm a burden to others and that I annoy them. I feel like I'm not "worthy" of love/there's nothing lovable about me, that there are too many problems in contrast to the little good things. Nevertheless, I would never change myself for anything or anyone, I am who I am. This is one of many reasons why I try to stay away and distance myself from others. For me, dealing and interacting with people is really difficult, because I'm so clumsy and nervous around them and easily feel like I'm making a fool out of myself. Another reason is that I fear to be rejected and thrown aside when someone sees how boring, problematic and annoying I actually am. It's also hard for me and incredible frustrating that I'm unable to articulate myself the way I want to, so that I mostly stay silent. And, since I'm a very quiet and rather shy person, I prefer people who initiate the contact and talk a lot/like to talk, who do the talking instead of me, but without intending to suppress myself. You would be surprised how timid and reserved I am, I'm sure you wouln't notice me in a room full of people if it wouldn't be for my different appearance (I'm always wearing only black, have dyed my hair a little and two ear piercings). Because I'm easily sad and not a funny/joking person, I like and enjoy people who are not too serious themselves. And I'm the most loyal person you'll ever find, once you earn my trust, I'll always be on/by your side, no matter what. I've always felt alienated from my surroundings, like I don't belong anywhere, like I'm the only cat in a room full of dogs. That's probably why I have a soft spot for the weirdos, outcasts, loners and "crazy" ones. Though, in my opinion, the definition of normal, crazy and real are very subjective. My whole life I've felt kinda judged, misunderstood and unwanted. People often falsely think that my unassuming nature is naivity and take my social-insecurity for aloofness and coldness. I'm also quite opinionated and aware of what I want, how I feel and who I am. I'm often questioning my surroundings, the traditions and rules and if I believe that something is wrong, I have absolutely no problem challenging others, even authority. I'm a perfectionist, which often leads me to overthinking and that can be equally good and bad. I'm absolutely clueless in romance and totally oblivious to flirting because I'm 100% inexperienced in this stuff, but I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic.

I crave physical touch and am literally melting into and bathing in any sort of touch, but I'm way too reluctant to initiate it. I'm rather sentimental with things given to me by people who I deeply care for, no matter how small or insignificant they may seem. Sadly, I'm not good with words to repeat how much someone means to me and I never know how to show/act on it either. I'm lazy, forgetful and sleepy most of the time and too much people, noise and light is exhausting for me. That's why I prefer to cozy up at home, watching a movie or TV show and listen to music. Music is my greatest passion, even if I can't sing or play an instrument. It's the most calming and therapeutic when it comes to my anxiety and depression and I could never live a day without it. When no one is around, I even sing along really loudly and off-tune. The meaning music has for me is hard to put into words, but it's my sanctuary for when I feel like my thoughts and feelings are suffocating me. You will never see me in the street without headphones in my ears and even when I'm at home there's music playing almost all the time. I could talk for hours about music and what it means to me. My taste in movies is more horror, fantasy and drama and in music it's rock, punk and pop, but for both I enjoy when it's themed around mental illness and real-life problems and when it's from the 80s and 90s. I like vintage things and would love to live in the 80's. I love the feeling of freedom and liveliness. My favourite weather is when it's gloomy and more cold, when it's pouring big fat drops and the air smells like rain and my favourite season is autumn because of the weather, colors, temperatures, flavors and overall aesthetic. I'm on the curvy-side and incredible insecure about it, although I really don't want to be. Once I trust you, I would love to talk for hours about music, movies, dreams, fears or anything alike and life in general, no matter how silly it may seems. I have a fascination for dark and macabre things. I also love to take late-night strolls, to gaze at the nightsky and literally feeling the freedom and infinity. My favourite colours are dark green, black, dark purple and gold. I love the scent of peppermint, cinnamon and the forest. I love plants and would love to decorate my home with them, but unfortunately I don't have a green thumb at all. I like ivy, lavender and roses the most. I wish I could live peacefully in a cottage, surrounded by a forest and many animals. I feel little conected to where I lwas born/am living and I'm deeply convinced that my soul belongs in the UK, always has.

+  Could I please request a male matchup for Stranger Things and Peaky Blinders? I'm female, she/her. (I know you said that no amount is too much, but I still hope that I didn't exaggerate here - and I'm sorry for any spelling and grammatical errors, english isn't my first language)

STRANGER THINGS

I ship you with Billy Hargrove!

This is somewhat of a controversial ship that can be both good and bad depending on the circumstances. I’m choosing to look at it from a positive perspective so bear with me.

Kindness, calmness and sympathy are your strongest personality traits and that is just what Billy Hargrove needs to bring him back to reality, because it is my opinion that the Billy we’ve gotten to see is only the version of himself that he has allowed us to see. 

Billy’s automatic response when someone tries to help him by digging into his emotions is to get angry and defensive. Why? Because he’s put so much time and effort into building up walls around himself in order to not have to feel all his pain over and over again, and every time someone comes and pokes holes in those walls, he snaps.

He’s so used to not being loved and being abandoned that he automatically assumes that people who come off as supportive are going to leave eventually, too. So in his mind, he might as well scare people away at once so that he doesn’t get his hopes up and ruins the walls that he’s put so much into. That’s just easier for everyone.

But although he succeeds in pushing people away by getting angry and therefore succeeding in protecting himself from more heartbreak, he still feels a subconscious guilt when seeing how much he scares people, because that’s how scared he is of his dad. He treats people like his dad treats him and it destroys him to live with that, but he just doesn’t know how to do anything else at this point because his only purpose in life now is to uphold those walls, by whatever means necessary, so while I don’t condone his behavior, nor do I support mentally abusive relationships, I do from a psychological standpoint, think that it would help Billy that you don’t get scared easily. 

Seeing people get so scared, even if it’s by his own doing, breaks him down more and more every time, a little at a time, and it would change everything for him to be met by something else than that immediate fear. He would be faced with an outcome he hasn’t experienced before, which is being seen as something more than a monster; or more specifically to him, being seen as something other than a replica of his dad, because I can guarantee you that that’s something that keeps him up at night. 

Anyone can say that they understand, that they know where someone is coming from, that even if they don’t understand, they can see a persons reasons. But a lot of the times, this is just a case of empty words. Billy knows this and that’s another reason that he doesn’t let people in when they try to get closer, and he proves his point by getting angry at them and seeing the way they react. All of them get scared and leave. Rightfully so, but it also does proves the point in his logic. 

You say that you have a calming and grounding effect on people which is something he’d really benefit from, as well. He naturally surrounds himself with people who match his energy; impulsive, wild, preferably illegal, with little to no thought of consequences. That’s his form of self-harm - to constantly surround himself with things and people that are bad for him, who likes his bad boy-image and encourages his bad behavior.

What he needs is something else entirely; and that is to be in a calm environment. He needs silence, peace, and even if just for a while, just anything but excitement. He needs someone who won’t encourage his chaotic and reckless lifestyle like most of the people he hangs out with do, in order to bring himself back down to earth and find himself again. 

Once he actually meets someone genuine and like-minded and realizes that they’re there to stay, he’d most likely accept the help he’s offered. And after that, he would be so loving toward his significant other because he’d never want her to feel like he does. He would want her to be the happiest person on the planet and if there’s something I’ve learned, myself, it’s that the people who love the hardest are usually the ones who have been loved the least. So if you were feeling insecure, he would lift you up and compliment you constantly, always let you know how beautiful and amazing he finds you, and how lucky he is to have you. He’d be so overly loving and appreciative toward you and everything you do that you’d rarely even have the time to get stuck with your self-doubt.

He, too, feels like he’s undeserving of love, because when has he ever been shown differently? So I also think it would give him somewhat of a wake-up call to see someone he cares about, or just such a kind, genuine person in general, feeling like that. At the same time, I also think he’d react strongly to the way you accept yourself and refuse to change for anyone despite all the self-doubt you have, because that requires an insane amount of strength. It would probably inspire him a lot to be better, himself.

Billy would, most definitely, be the one to initiate contact with you just like he does every other female in his presence. Maybe it’s my mind being too mushed together by all the fanfiction I’ve read over the years, but I feel that once he got to know you, he would just fall for you on the spot. Not just “fall”, either. He’d trip on his shoelaces, fall on his face and roll down a flight of stairs once he finally managed to wrap his head around the fact that you understand, that you care and that you’re not going anywhere.

After initiating contact and coming to that realization, he wouldn’t mind just spending time with you in silence. All that talking he does is nothing more than a façade he’s put up to feel less out of place, less pathetic about being so weak around his dad, but it’s not the real him at all. Billy has been cold and guarded for so long that he, just like you, no longer knows how to communicate his feelings through words, either. Instead, he tends to show his emotions through his actions, so I can imagine there being a lot of silence. Mutual silence.

Would he still enjoy having genuine conversations with you? Yes, absolutely. As would he never hesitate to joke around if you felt down and needed to laugh. But he would also feel safe enough with you to be silent and vulnerable, without feeling that pressure to always keep talking and acting like he does when he’s with other people. He pretends to be comfortable, pretends to fit in, but in reality, he feels out of place, too. He’s felt unwanted, judged and misunderstood for most of his life just like you describe yourself to have done.

He has fooled around with a lot of girls but he’s still touch-starved, because no-strings-attached relations doesn’t do anything for him other than provide a temporary distraction. It never gives him the emotional, sentimental, meaningful proximity that he needs, so you have in common to crave physical touch and it would be a mutual thing for the two of you to show your emotions through touch rather than words.

You also have your love for music in common, and it’s so fitting because you like the same genres, which would only give him another way to be free around you. I can just imagine the two of you belting out your highest notes, totally off-key, while blaring rock music in his car.

To finish it off, loyalty is something he values above everything which is why he can never really hold on to long-term relationships or friendships. The only person who has ever been truly loyal to him was his mom, and even she made the active choice to leave him in the end, which is where his commitment issues stem from. So the fact that you’re genuinely loyal will be a complete game-changer. 

He, too, loves the feeling of being free, and I have no doubt in my mind that the two of you would find ways to feel that way together without him going back to his old, problematic methods.

Like I’ve mentioned before, I definitely don’t condone his behavior nor do I encourage anyone to stay in a toxic and abusive relationship, whether it be mental, emotional, or physical abuse. I don’t like savior-complexes and I don’t encourage anyone to get together with a “bad boy” because they think they can “cHaNgE HiM”.

But I feel like Billy is one of those cases that has certain circumstances that makes him a bit of an exception. He’s made some reaaaally bad choices and treated people very badly which he still has to be held accountable for, but going forward, he could be an amazing person if only he got reminded of what it feels like to be loved. Because at this point, he’s probably completely forgotten it, and living without love for so long will drive any person into madness.

I still wouldn’t recommend someone heading into a relationship with him solely for the purpose of “changing him”, but I do think that, if the right person came along on random, these changes wouldn’t at all be impossible.

The way he behaves toward people can’t be excused and he still needs to own up to his behavior and mistakes, but I think we’ve gotten it proven at the end of last season that he actually does want to be better and that all he needed toward the end was to be shown some genuine love in order to be able to make that change. 

 PEAKY BLINDERS

I ship you with Arthur Shelby!

Arthur is like Billy in a lot of ways, so this is a controversial one too for the same reasons, but Arthur is also very different.

While Billy has built up tall, strong, practically non-penetrable walls around himself to avoid having to feel anything, Arthur is much more emotional and aware of his mistakes since he never really managed to use his trauma to build up a protective wall, but rather just let them pile up without knowing how to properly process them so that he’s now stuck having to feel it all at once with no way out. 

He was left really vulnerable after his dad left which, I think, made him more open for the trauma he experienced during the war. It is my honest opinion that, had his dad still been in the picture, he would’ve been a lot less unstable today. But, as we know, his dad left him and his siblings, and that was the first trigger to a long line of domino bricks.

At this point, he’s so damaged that he has no sense of self-worth, whatsoever. He doesn’t feel worthy of love or a good life even though he wishes and dreams of it, so once he actually finds someone who wants to be with him, he falls hard, and would do anything in his power to be the best possible partner.

He’d be so romantic, so loving, so eager to please that he’d agree to pretty much anything requested of him. He’d abandon all of his other responsibilities to just live a happy life with you so living peacefully in a secluded area in a cottage with lots of animals is not something he would be opposed to at all. Nor would taking late-night strolls or staying in with you when everyone else goes out to drink be, because I’m certain that the only reason he drinks is because being sober on his own is too painful. 

His way of acting out with anger and violence is nothing more than a product of his environment. Every day, every sound, every smell, every person he surrounds himself with, are triggers to his multiple traumas and the longer he surrounds himself with chaos, the more he’s going to lose himself to his anger – because anger is the only emotion through which he knows how to handle his trauma, as no one has ever tried helping him onto a healthier road of recovery but rather just told him to “suck it up”.

So the fact that you’re so kind, calm, sympathetic and understanding, and that you’re recognize where anger, frustration and despair comes from, that you’re open and impartial toward everyone without any judgment or prejudice, and also have a calming and grounding effect on people would just help him so much. Everyone else that he frequently surrounds himself with are big parts of the problem that is his mental illnesses and aggressive and violent tendencies. They do nothing to help but rather encourages it and fuels the fire so they can use his anger for their own winning.

He’s just constantly told to suck it up, be a man, have a drink or three, snort a line of cocaine, blah blah blah. The way his mental instability is treated by his inner circle is the literal embodiment of toxic masculinity and does nothing to help his case, because then he starts hating himself even more for feeling all the emotions that he does.

So, once given the correct support that he needs, he would pay you right back by making sure you never go a day without being told how amazing you are and how lucky he is to have you. He would throw, or at least try to his absolute best ability to do so, all of your insecurities out the window before they’d even gotten the chance to get through the door. He would literally adore you and, metaphorically speaking, be ready to eat straight out of your palm if told to do so.

All he needs is kindness, understanding and most of all patience, because while he is a work in progress, he is trying.

[loveburnsbrighter]

Prompt: 7. Late nights (bonus points if it’s pre-Grad Night or early relationship bc I’m sad and pathetic and it’s all I want 🥺)

it's been soooo long but i finally cranked this one out! i challenged myself by writing pre-grad night, and it was so much fun :-) i hope you love it! here's the ao3 link.

"What do you mean you've never seen The Princess Bride?"  Patrick mock-glares at David, then turns to Stevie.  "Did you know about this?"

Stevie shrugs, and the look on her face tells David that she cares less about the actual fact that he's never seen the movie than she does about bothering him to death.  "I can't say it's ever come up, but I naturally assumed he had."

David leans against the counter, supporting himself on both hands as he lets his shoulders slump.  It's nearly closing time, and this conversation is ridiculous, but he feels comfortable.  The store has only been open for a little over a week, but the three of them have spent so much time in this space together that it feels natural, standing at the counter and getting harrassed by the two of them.

"David, you have to watch it.  I can loan you my copy —" Patrick actually does seem invested in this, which David, God help him, finds endearing.

"There's no DVD player in my room," he says, engaging because Patrick's eyes are sparkling, and he's got his top two buttons undone, and no undershirt on, and when he gestures, the shirt gapes a little too wide, giving David a glimpse of collarbone.

And because Alexis and Stevie have hooked David on the idea that maybe Patrick might be…not totally straight.  And not totally not into David.  He's helpless to the maybe of it all.

Which is why, when Patrick says, "Well, Ray's not home tonight, why don't we have a little watch party?"  David finds himself agreeing.

Stevie agrees too, when David shoots her a sharp glance, and if Patrick has any reaction to that, he doesn't show it.  But Stevie is, despite all her and David's constant bickering and blustering, an excellent friend, and she understands without him having to say a word that watching a movie together, alone, on Ray's awful floral couch, lights off, probably a bottle of wine open…it would destroy him.

"Great," is all Patrick says.  "I have a thing after we close, but you guys can come by at like eight?  I'll make Jiffy Pop."

There it is.  Already.  The very idea of Patrick standing at the stove making popcorn the old-fashioned way is enough to make David want to bury his face in his hands and squeal.  This is why he needs Stevie.

"You're my buffer," David explains to Stevie on the drive over.  He's got two packs of brand-x licorice, because the single sad convenience store in Schitt's Creek actually can't afford to sell name brands, and a bottle of wine he pilfered from his mom's stash before they left.

"I don't think he's planning to sleep with you tonight," Stevie says mildly.

"My emotional buffer."  He curls one leg up, putting his heel on the seat of Stevie's passenger seat.  "Because I really like him, and I don't — if I'm left alone with him, like that, I'll definitely say something stupid and ruin our friendship, and then he'll pull out of our contracts and I'll run my business into the ground and be back to only having one friend."

Stevie snorts indelicately.  "Who's saying I wouldn't take Patrick's side in the divorce?"

He ignores her, watching out the windshield as they pull into Ray's driveway.

Patrick greets them at the door and leads them to the kitchen to pour the wine; David stands at the counter and observes that Patrick actually has made Jiffy Pop.  Something about it seems weirdly nostalgic to David, despite the fact that he himself had a professional popcorn machine growing up, and it makes him ache in a way he doesn't want to poke too closely.  This is probably a relic of Patrick's growing up.  David can almost picture tiny Patrick, standing on a chair to reach the stove and observing the foil rising into a ball for him.

While David has been lost to this thought, Patrick has found three stemless wine glasses and poured the wine.  Stevie unearths a big bowl from the depths of Ray's cupboards for the popcorn, and together the three of them troop to the living room.

It's so much worse than David could have imagined.

There's just the couch — there's an armchair, but it's beside the TV rather than pointed at it, and there's nowhere to move it to.  They'll have to share the couch, which has a horribly ugly, probably handmade and supremely cozy-looking afghan draped over it.

Stevie and Patrick claim the ends of the couch, leaving the middle for David, which is reasonable — they're both better friends with him than they are with each other, and it's the first time David has experienced that dynamic in his life — and a nightmare, because now he has to sit beside Patrick.

Patrick is unbothered, because it's normal to sit squished on a couch with someone you only consider a friend.  Or because he's just completely unflappable; thus far, David has yet to see him express emotions outside of frustration, focus, and varying shades of amusement.

David plops between them, and his thigh grazes Patrick's.  He tries to squish closer to Stevie, and she pushes him back.

"Are you uncomfortable?"  Patrick turns toward David a bit, pushing the whole solid line of his thigh against David's.  This was a mistake, this whole thing.  David should have come up with an excuse not to come.  A prior engagement.  Dinner with his parents.  A Sunrise Bay viewing party.  A trans-continental flight.

David gives in when Patrick hands him the popcorn bowl, cradling it like a child and trying to ignore the line of nerves lit up where their legs are pressed together as Patrick queues up the movie.

David focuses on the screen studiously, like he'll be tested on it.  Sips his wine, crunches his popcorn, lets the vaguely European fantasy hijinks onscreen take up as much real estate as they can in his mind.  It's an easy movie to focus on, funny in a way that means he can see why it's such an icon.  Romantic enough that David can't help but be a total sucker for it.

It's not until midway through that things get dire.  Wallace Shaw has just laughed his last victorious laugh and keeled over, and Patrick nudges David, taking the mostly-empty popcorn bowl and setting it on the coffee table.  He reaches back for the afghan and tugs it from behind their backs, and passes the end to Stevie, so that the three of them are snuggled beneath it, and David is the middle of the coziest little sandwich.

It's a nightmare.  He glances at Patrick, who's watching the screen with a little smile, and then he looks back and turns that little smile on David, and David takes a deep breath and turns back to the screen.

It's fine.  What's changed, really?  That they're warmer now?  They aren't cuddling, or anything.  Although Patrick looks cuddly to the max in his little blue sweater.  It's almost definitely synthetic and remarkably soft for the fact.

David sneaks a glance at Patrick out of the corner of his eye; he's so relaxed, so in his element.  David feels like he's never seen Patrick out of his element.  Is everything his element?  David is struck with an urge — or maybe a quiet desperation — to find the borders of Patrick's comfort zone.  To prove that they exist.

David's borders are everywhere.  They're under this blanket and along the side of his thigh and at the bottom of his empty glass.  His comfort zone is smaller than his body, and so everyone is always rubbing his edges.

But with Patrick, he instinctively minds less than with…a lot of other people.  Surely that must mean something.  Maybe not something cosmic, but…something.

It gets even worse.

David is focusing as studiously as he can on the movie, doing his best to ignore Patrick's thigh against his, his shoulder against his.  Wesley is mostly dead, and David is caught up in the fantasy peril, he is, and then Patrick yawns, pressing his whole palm up to his mouth, and slumps and rests his head against David's bicep.

It's unacceptable.  To be that casually touchy with a friend.  A coworker.  David wants to shove Patrick off and shout that there are rules about how to treat people you don't want to date.  He wants to hold him close, wrap an arm around him and whisper and gamble on that…maybe he does.

Rather than doing either of those things, he turns his head slowly to glare at Stevie in total panic.  She meets him with an excited little smile.  "Yes," she whispers.  "Love this for you."

"Don't rush me sonny," the healer guy onscreen says.  "You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles."  Like having an unrequited crush on the guy sleeping on you, David thinks sourly.

"Hmm?"  Patrick lifts his head from David's arm to look at him and Stevie, and David immediately misses the warm weight.

"Nothing," David says too quickly.  Patrick frowns, and he doesn't say anything but he supports his own head for the rest of the movie.

David knows he's in too deep now, because he wants to tug Patrick back to him.  He wants to hold him, and this isn't — normal, for David, is what makes it horrible.  He's not used to slowly growing to like people.  He's not used to liking people, flat out.  Attraction is something he can handle, the invisible line that draws two people together for a night or a week or a month, keeps them in the same bed until they find new beds to fall into.

But this?  Getting to know someone, feeling warm in his gut when they smile at him?  Wanting to know someone better, and wanting them at the same time?  This is new.  And to have these feelings for Patrick, who's so buttoned-up and straight-laced, nice and smart and clean?  Even if sometimes David thinks… 

Because you don't lean your head on someone's arm if you don't like them, right? 

David loses the whole finale of the movie, trapped in his head with Patrick beside him, warm and soft and sleepy.  Imagining things too far and then reeling himself back in — like what if after the movie, Stevie left, and David and Patrick put in another movie and fell asleep sweater-to-sweater on this couch?  But no, stop, because Patrick…who knew if he felt even a spark of what David felt?  He couldn't risk this, their friendship, their business… 

"So, what did you think?"  Patrick asks over the incredibly sappy song rolling in the credits.

"Mm," David says, trying to think of something to show he's been paying attention.  "I normally am not a fantasy fan, but young Robin Wright is a gift."  God, that makes him sound like he's into Robin Wright, what the fuck is wrong with him.

Patrick's invisible brows raise half a millimeter and his mouth curves with something akin to fondness as Stevie pokes David harshly in the shoulder, no doubt ribbing him for saying something so stupid.  It's hard to care when Patrick's expression is making David feel hopeful that maybe, maybe what he feels between them is double-sided.

"That she is," Patrick says.  He's alert enough, but he looks sleepy, his eyes ten percent warmer and wider than usual.  David wonders what it would be like to have a night like this and then stay; to let Patrick nod off against his shoulder and not wake him.

"We should get going," he says instead.

Patrick follows David and Stevie to the door; Stevie is already halfway down the driveway, having said her goodbye, when Patrick puts a hand on David's elbow.  "We should do this again sometime," he says.  "I had fun."

For a second David lets himself imagine that this is the end of a date.  That he could smile and pout and lean in and Patrick would lean too and they could kiss and hug, that David could leave feeling warmed up inside.

Just for a second.  Because this isn't that.  "Me too," he says, and despite the bite of just friends when he's so desperate for more, he means it.  He'll take friendship with Patrick, movie nights and long days at work, anything he can get.

He turns and joins Stevie, and Patrick waves from the doorway as they back out.  David rolls his eyes but he waves back, and it's strange — he does feel a little glow, as if they did have a date.  He turns to Stevie, and she's smiling at him just a bit, just out of the corner of her mouth.

Don't rush it.  Maybe, maybe, he thinks all the way home.

[realmeisstuff]

NIGHT SHIFT

(Hoshi Fanfic)

Her lids were getting heavier, but her gaze was going back and forth to the patient that she was supposedly looking after. It's not that she didn't want to do this job, it's just that the silence bores her.

Since they have fewer clients, the hospital had to lay off some employees, and luckily (unluckily) she was chosen to stay. But the downside is that she had to be on her own during night shifts.

She was actually an introvert, but right now she craves for an interesting conversation. One she wouldn't get from a confused, aphasic patient. But she didn't want to complain, afterall, she was there to work.

But then she just had to finish everything by 2am unintentionally, which left her with 6 hours time to kill, since the patient was stable.

She searched for her friends who might be awake at this hour, but there was none (obviously). Feeling daring, she tried to search for an app where she could chat someone. She really just wanted to talk to anyone, even though she knew what mostly happens in random chats, but of course she wouldn't cross that line.

First, she had to pick the gender she's interested in, then she had to click her age. Certainly, this is some dating modus that she's not looking for, but then again, she was bored. She picked Watashi wa Hana as her nickname, just because.

Most private chats would start with the usual "Hi" and "Hello", then random people with weird nicknames, would ask what country she's from. She contemplated for a bit whether to be honest, but she realized that lying would kinda be stupid.

To filter the chatboxes that kept appearing, she started the conversation with, "I'm kinda curious, why did you join this app?" As predicted, most would be so straight forward and would ask if she could send pics or do some sexy stuffs. Those private chats would automatically be deleted, she's not here for this.

TigerEyes would like to chat with you. She read. Unlike the others, he didn't start with the usual intro.

TigerEyes: r u Japanese?

WatashiWaHana: No, just got it from the lyrics of my favorite song

TigerEyes: Which is?

She immediately got that spark igniting within her, the same she got whenever she speaks to someone about her favorite music or other interests. She felt the need to promote but realized that she needed to tone it down.

WatashiWaHana: Some Japanese song. I think the title is Fallin' Flower. Sounds so catchy.

TigerEyes: Maybe I'll check it out. I'm boooooooored

That caught her attention, maybe he's just like her.

WatashiwaHana: Me too. Why did you join this app? I'm curious

TigerEyes: Hmm to have fun ofc. (Another predictable answer, she thought) Why, do you have anything else in mind?

Why does that sound so. . .provocative. Or was it just her imaginations?

WatashiwaHana:I like conversations, I just wanted someone to talk to. I'm bored

TigerEyes: okaaay, let's start a conversation then. What are your interests?

Hmmm nice, at least someone with sense, she said to herself. Maybe he'd be worth talking to.

WatashiwaHana: I like travelling, dancing, music. How 'bout u?

TigerEyes: I like dancing too, I sometimes do choreographies 😉

WH: That's impressive, you must be so creative.

TigerEyes: Yes I am, I could be sooo creative, I could fulfill your fantasies.

That was disappointing. She huffed.

She tapped her phone, while deciding whether to reply or not. It was the longest convo she had here so far, it seems like a waste to delete this chatbox.

TigerEyes: What are your fantasies?

She decided to be playful.

WH: I have lots of fantasies. In what exactly?

TigerEyes: Hmmm..What do you expect from this conversation?

He seems like a much more deeper person than she expected, but she get it that he's trying to be like everyone else who uses this app.

WH: I really just wanted to converse with someone, but I get what most people wanted to gain from this.

Most people? That didn't sound right for him, he didn't like to be like everyone else. But he gets why she thinks that way. He wanted to blame it to this stupid app, while denying his true intentions from awhile ago.

WH: It's cliche, really

TigerEyes: Fun

WH: Am I boring you already? (She laughed nervously, it's just how introverts are, she expected this already) Anyways nice chatting with you

She almost turned off her phone, when

TigerEyes: Wait. Let's make this interesting then

WH: Depends on your idea of interesting

TigerEyes: Oh no, depends on yours. What do you want? You told me you want  conversations. So let's do that 😁

WH: Do you have any acquaintances here?

TE: I'm actually new here. Honestly I had a girlfriend but we broke up. I kinda miss her especially when I needed a company

WH: Oh that sucks. Do you want to tell me about it? They say that talking 'bout it helps you move on

TE:********

WH: You don't want to? That's okay.

She's starting to like this convo. Opening up is something that truly starts real conversations, and you rarely get that from strangers especially on online dating chat apps.

TE: How about you? Do you have some fantasies? How he should be? How he should treat you?

WH: I actually don't have anyone. Maybe that's why I donloaded this app 'coz I want someone to talk to. Maybe that's my fantasy. Chilling at the house with someone special, without fearing of not being able to go home.

TE: Don't regret. I still believe that best things are waiting for us. I'm willing to listen, just be yourself and tell me things. Like...umm ...what's your ideal date? If ever you meet that someone

WH: I want something cozy. Like lots of cuddles, coffee, movies and conversations, what's yours?

TE: I would like to take her to a romantic dinner date. Enjoy a sip of wine. Dance while holding her close and looking into her eyes.

WH: Sounds romantic. Kinda reminds me of romcom movies

TE: Thanks for the compliment.

WH: Have you done that with someone?

He didn't want to remember but it's too hard to forget.

TE: Yes. I did it with her before. I like taking her on surprised trips. She likes natural and serene places.

WH: Give me a recommendation where to go then

TE: Why? I thought you're single 😂

WH: Can't I go there alone? I told you I like travelling.

TE: Maybe you'd like to travel with me then. I could be your tour guide.

WH: Hmmmmm

TE: What? I don't bite! I have tiger eyes, but believe me I'm actually a hamster at heart

That made her chuckle. This guy seems so cute. It made her wonder why his ex- girlfriend broke up with him. He seems nice.

WH: I'd like that.

Now she didn't see that coming. Never had she ever thought that being bored during night shift would lead to meeting someone. Now she just have to wait 'til the pandemic is over to finally have that trip with her newfound friend.

[justanotherwannabeclassic]

Ready, Set, Please Don’t Go

Killian Jones walks in on his daughter in a compromising position, leading to the realization that his little girl really is growing up.

Author’s Note: Here's another snippet set in the Finding Neverland universe. It's absolutely unnecessary to read Finding Neverland to understand this story, though readers of the original my remember a "library incident" mentioned in a chapter of this story. hat being said, this turned out way different than I expected it to go, which is the best/worst part of writing fic. I hope you all enjoy! Also, this story is dedicated to the wonderful @distant-rose, who is amazing and wonderful and a fantastic friend.

Rating: M (strong language and sexual situations)

[AO3]

XXXXXX

It starts with an admission of a high school tryst.

They’re back in Storybrooke, making the most of a long weekend away from work and research. There’s a festival going on, because somewhere over the near thirty years of the town’s existence, they’ve embraced celebrating. Juliet’s grandmother says it’s because everyone learned all too well how easy it is to lose everything. Whatever the reason, Juliet is fond of the fact that she gets to wander around various booths with his fingers twined around her boyfriend’s and enjoying the familiarity of coming home.

Juliet likes to think she’s come a long way since she was the girl who left Storybrooke for New York City four years ago. She has a degree and a license that actually says she’s twenty-one, but it’s more than that. She likes to think she’s matured, and though she has no inclinations of returning back to her hometown anytime soon, she now embraces the coziness of it all. And, well, the girl of four years ago never would have imagined holding hands with Gideon Gold as they traipsed down Main Street, happy and deliriously in love. 

They’d only been in the same school for a year, her a freshman and he a senior, but he Juliet Jones of Storybrooke High hadn’t been particularly kind to Gideon. She’d been a little too conscious of their respective places in the high school caste system. Even as a freshman, she’d been fawned over by her classmates as a member of the Charming family, The Savior’s daughter, and Henry’s sister. The son of the Dark One didn’t warrant the same favor. It was only once they were both in New York, she starting at Columbia and him finishing up his degree at NYU, that they’d begun to forge a closer relationship, and later, a romantic one.

She supposes his loner nature and her role as the school’s “princess” only furthers the cliche nature of their relationship. When they had made it public they were dating, Neal had monologued the opening lines of Romeo and Juliet.  (“Two families both alike in dignity, in fair Storybrooke we build our scene…” “I hope you realize this means you die too, asshole.”) They might as well add the damn John Hughes movie to the list.

But it doesn’t matter. They’re happy, in love, and openly together in Storybrooke.

They’re in line for cotton candy, Gideon whispering into her ear about the unhealthiness of eating pure sugar, when they bump into old friend hers from high school, Viola. It’s not unexpected. Most people don’t leave Storybrooke or choose to come back to Storybrooke, after all, and they exchange pleasantries.

“How are you liking the big city? I don’t think I could deal with that many people. The traffic alone…”

“That’s what the MTA is for,” Juliet replies with a laugh. To be honest, her friendship with Viola had been one that drifted after she left for Columbia. It was one that Juliet now realizes was born out of proximity and not very many common interests. “But, seriously, it’s great. We’re really happy.” She flashes a grin up Gideon.

He returns her grin with one of his own. God, she loves his smile. “I dunno, I’m pretty damn miserable.”

“A miserable liar, maybe.” Juliet turns her attention back to Viola, who is watching them with an incredulous expression. Maybe this isn’t what Viola expected of the Juliet of four years ago. Maybe it’s not what she would have expected either. Knowing the conversation will only grow more stitled from there, Juliet focuses on what Viola clearly wants her to notice. With exaggerated excitement she doesn’t feel, she asks, “Holy shit! Is that a ring?”

Viola waves her left hand, where a diamond sits. “Yes, Aidan proposed! You’ll have to come back up for the wedding. We’re thinking next April.”

“Wouldn’t miss it.” To be honest, Juliet hadn’t known Viola was even dating Aidan.   Oh well. Thankfully, they’re saved from more conversation by the cotton candy. They bid their farewells, and go their separate ways.

“Are we seriously going to go her wedding?” Gideon asks once they’re far enough out of earshot. He steals a bite of her cotton candy -- the hypocritical bastard -- before saying, “I wouldn’t really mind, but I only have the vaguest idea of who she is.”

“God, no,” Juliet replies, instantly regretting how mean she sounds. But, she has a reason. “Honestly, even if we had said more than ten sentences to each since graduation, it would be a little awkward. The last time I saw Aidan, he’d just finished fingering me in sci-fi section of the library. It’s weird to go to the wedding of guys you hit third base with, right?” She shudders at the memory.

Gideon stops abruptly. “Wait, what?” He looks surprised, and honestly, a little annoyed.

“Oh, God, please don’t turn this into a thing.” Gideon unfortunately has a slight jealous streak when it comes to her. It’s not overbearing, thankfully, but it’s present enough to annoy her every now and then. She attributes it mostly to his low self-esteem brought by half the town assuming he’s turn evil as an adult coupled with the way she’d dated every guy but him the year leading up to them finally getting together. She understands where he is coming from, really, but she doesn’t have to like it.

“I’m not turning this into a thing. That’s not it, not entirely,” he amends. “But, seriously, the library?”

“Oh, this is about defiling books .”

He laughs, almost hysterically. “Not quite, no.”

“Then what is it?” She takes a bite of the cotton candy, and delights in the way his eyes track the movement of tongue as she traces her lips for any errant sugar.

He begins to lead her away from the crowd, and his voice lowers. “Remember that time we listed our fantasies?”

She hums in reply. She remembers it well, and still benefits from it too.

“Let’s just say teenage Gideon would have killed to be fingering a pretty girl in the library.” His cheeks are an enjoyable shade of red. He’s always a little embarrassed when talking publicly about sex. Back when they were ‘just friends’, his exploits were something that rarely ever came up, even though she’d been less discreet about hers.

“And what about adult Gideon?”

“What about adult Gideon?”

“It’s after six. The library is closed, and you have a pretty girl who is just about to finish her cotton candy and will soon be wondering just what she can be getting up to later.” She quirks her brow for emphasis. “So what would adult Gideon say we do?”

She’s always been a bit reckless. She enjoys the rush of adrenaline, and sees caution as a suggestion. Gideon’s her opposite in that regard, which is why she can’t contain her gleeful laugh as he more or less drags her to the library at a half-jog. She knows she could magic them there, but this gets her heart pounding in a way that magic does not.

In no time at all, they’re in the library — she bites back a laugh at his attempts to unlock the door — and her back is against the wall as Gideon’s mouth fuses to hers. It’s times like these where she wishes she had gotten over herself enough for them to come together sooner. As much as Gideon had been quiet about his sexploits, he’d picked up some skill. And where he lacked, he certainly made up by being a quick study. “You’re amazing,” he tells her. He lifts his hand, and brushes he strand of hair behind her ear. She leans into his palm.”Do I tell you that enough?”

“You do.” She runs her hands over the front of his shirt, and begins to toy with the buttons. With a teasing smirk, she adds, “Though, to be fair, you mostly tell me when I’m in a state of undress...or about to be.”

“I’ll be sure to rectify that...later.” She squeals when he pulls away from her, only to lift her into his arms. He quickly maneuvers them to the collections desk, and drops her on top of it. Goosebumps form over her skin as his hands span up her bare thighs, and she relishes in the way his warm breath fans across the skin of her face. “This okay?”

“It’s totally okay.” Any other quips she might think to say are lost when he lips close over the most sensitive spot on her neck, sendling shocks of pleasure down her spine. She gasps, her hands carding through his hair as she tilts her neck for easier access. His hands skate over her shorts and work their way under her shirt. Her skin burns hot as his palms burn over the smooth expanse, and she sighs.

They break apart long enough for both of them to remove their shirts. She thinks he breaks a button in his eagerness to remove his top, but she doesn’t mind in the slightest, enjoying the sight of shirtless male in front of her. He’s not incredibly muscular, but he’s toned enough -- and god, his collarbones. She pays particular attention to that part of his body first, eagerly nipping. As she leans forward, his hand slip over her ass, pulling her closer and squeezing as he goes. They move together, their pants dulling the sensation and doing nothing to hide his ardor for her.

She loves the power that comes with sex, the thrill of slowly making her partner come undone -- and that is what drives her next course of action. After all, she knows of know better way to make a man come undone. He groans when she pulls away, the brokeness bringing a smile to her face. She places a finger against his lips as she dismounts from the desk. He nips at the pad of her index finger as she reverses their positions. “What are you planning?”

“Something that will blow teenage Gideon’s mind.”

Juliet drops to her knees.

  -/-

  There are sacrifices one makes for their children.

Some are small, like the last piece of pie. Others are larger sacrifices, such as dedicating everything you can in you to ensuring your child has the best life. Killian Jones, of course, makes these sacrifices willingly, and most of the time, happily.  Ever since the day that the doctor placed a squawking infant -- his daughter -- into his arms, Killian Jones knew that he’d do everything in his power to make her smile. Decades later, he likes to think he’s done a decent enough job. Juliet is happy and healthy, and has the confidence to leave the comfort of Storybrooke and chart a course of her own. And, despite her being an adult, he’ll continue doing what he’s able to ensure her happiness.

However, there are some sacrifices that try his patience -- such as being friendly with the Crocodile.

Over the course of two decades, he and the Dark One have kept their distances. They’ll be cordial at functions that they’re both in attendance, and he’ll never disparage the man around Belle. He values his friendship with her too much for that. Truthfully speaking, over the years, no one has ever truly required them to go out of their way to be in the same place.  

Ah, but then his daughter fell in love with the Dark One’s son, and expectations had been formed.  

“I know you all have bad blood, but can you at least try? For me?” Juliet had asked him. He can’t blame her for doing such a thing. He’d shield her from much of his history with the Crocodile. She knows enough -- he remembers with stunning clarity the afternoon he’d explained to her, just five and infinitely curious, why the name ‘Milah’ was tattooed on his wrist -- but both he and Emma had intentionally agreed to leave out the gorier details of his life. Her basic knowledge cannot compared to the memories of living in the thick of it all.

Which is why, shortly after Juliet had made that request of him, he had mused to Emma in the comfort of their own bed, “Perhaps they’ll break up.”

“I don’t think that’s going to happen anytime soon. This one’s different,” Emma had replied, and that much they knew to be true. Killian had seen that boys that had captured Juliet’s interest over the years -- all of them unworthy of her, in his opinion -- and it’s true that this one felt different. “Besides, if things do go south, you don’t want that heartbreak for her.”

“No, you’re right,” he’d replied. He remembers pulling Emma closer to him, and whispering in her hair, “I’m beginning to understand your father’s perspective a bit more when you began courting me.”

“I’m telling him you said that.”

And it is because he doesn’t want to make life harder for his daughter -- he knows well enough the benefits of a smooth relationship with the in-laws -- Killian puts on his best smile and acts even friendlier with the Crocodile. Though they’ve never explicitly discussed the matter, Killian suspects that Gideon had made the same request of his own father, as the Crocodile has not made one snide comment or appeared surprised at whatever warming relationships they might have.

Belle, at the very least, seems happy about the turn of events. And he can’t deny that Gideon is a good young man, a far cry from the tortured soul who had attempted to kill Emma decades ago. (Killian still has nightmares of their wedding night, of watching the sword drive into Emma’s gut.) But he can’t hold that against Belle’s son. He’d be hypocritical at best, especially considering the respectable person he’s since grown into. Besides, there’s no denying that Gideon looks at Juliet like she’s the moon and stars, and his daughter is quite happy with him.

Which, unfortunately, means he’s on a quest with the Crocodile to retrieve a box of books from the library for a booth at the festival. They library had been going through the process of culling its selection, weeding out extra copies of no longer popular tomes so there would be space for current interests. Belle had concocted a plan to set up a booth to give away the books, and had asked Killian and her husband to fetch a couple of boxes she’d left behind.

He honestly thinks this is a plan of Belle’s to get the two of them to talk more, to further bury the hatchet at the request of their children. The Dark One certainly has the power to poof the boxes. (He has made an effort to use magic less over the years, something Killian will not complain about.) She might have also asked Emma for help, but he’s pretty sure his wife is also in on the scheme.

In the effort of trying , he and the Dark One -- Gold -- exchange in small talk, but it is stilted and awkward. Which is possibly why the conversation dovetails into talking about their children, an easy topic for any proud parent.

“Gideon tells me that Juliet graduated cum laude? I’ll have to extend my congratulations to all of her hard work.”

“Aye. She did excellently. Emma and I are quite proud.” He already has a picture from her graduation day of the three of them sitting on the mantle -- Juliet clad in her regalia, smiling broadly while flanked by her parents. Gideon had been the one to take the picture. “I imagine you are too, with Gideon studying to be a doctor.”

“We are.” The Crocodile’s expression morphs into one that Killian knows all too well -- the sort of look one gets when they can’t quite believe they had a part in raising someone good. “It’s astounding to think that he’ll be completing medical school next year. It seems like yesterday he was just learning to walk.”

“I know the feeling all too well.” He hates how much he relates to Gold at the moment. Emma has occasionally commented how fatherhood has mellowed them both over the years, but Killian doesn’t want to bond over it. The things we do for our children.

But, at the same time, he cannot deny that Gold is wrong. Killian Jones has lived hundreds of years, but none have passed by as quickly as those since Juliet’s birth. In what feels like the blink of an eyes, she’s gone from being a wee babe to a child to a teenager and now an adult. Hadn’t it been just yesterday that she had been stumbling over her consonants as he taught her how to read?

“Those nights when she would keep Emma and I up all night, I remember wishing that time would pass quickly. Now I find myself wishing I could turn back the time and go back.”

“After what happened with my sorry excuse of a mother, I learned not to take any time with Gideon for granted,” Gold replies darkly.

Killian’s first reaction is to consider it a slight, an implication that he somehow has taken his daughter’s childhood for granted, but his cooler head prevails. He recalls how scarred Belle had been during the mess with the Black Fairy, and how even after Gideon back she had barely left him out of her sight. If the same thing had happened to Juliet…

It’s a thought that kept him awake many nights during Emma’s pregnancy. Storybrooke and normal pregnancies or childbirth rarely went hand-in-hand back in those days, and certainly not for their family. He’d be plagued by nightmares full of villains from his past -- men he’d crossed or wronged -- sneaking into his home and doing harm to his child with him unable to save her.

They’d been lucky, with Juliet. She’d been safe and sound. There had been villains since then, but she’d been mostly safe. Nothing like what Gold and Belle had gone through with Gideon, or David and Snow with Emma. For once, Killian Jones had been the blessed one. He tries not to let himself forget it.

He and the Crocodile don’t talk much after that, not until after they’ve worked their way through the crowd and arrive at the library.  

“Where did Belle say she left the boxes?”

“By the circulation desk.” Gold pulls the keys to the library out of his pocket before he suddenly stops. Killian glances over the other man’s shoulder to see why, before noticing the slightly ajar doors. By Killian’s estimation, it seems as someone had simply let the door close behind them, not realizing that they hadn’t shut completely. “I know I locked this earlier.”

“It’s not the first time someone has broken into the library. Probably some horny or drunk youths looking for a quiet space and a good time.” How many times had he or Emma busted people sneaking into the library for a good time over the years? It’s turned into almost a rite of passage amongst the teens. Though he understands the thrill of breaking-and-entering, Killian doesn’t quite understand why the library is the chosen location. He’s crossed Belle enough times to know that is a spectacularly bad idea. “They probably thought the festival would be a good distraction.”

“And now they’re about to find themselves caught by the Dark One and Captain Hook. I almost pity them.”

Killian highly doubts that this is what any of the women is his life hoped for when it came to bonding with Gold. This certainly isn’t what he envisioned, but he’ll take it. Terrible as it might be, he takes certain enjoyment in knowing just how terrified whomever is in there will be when they realize just who they’ve been caught by. Quietly, Gold pushes open the library door and they creep inside the building. Once inside, they can clearly hear low moans and the slick sound of--

“Oh fuck---ohmygod!”

  -/-

  Juliet is hiding. She’s admittedly doing a poor job of it, because her hiding place is the back porch swing of her childhood home. In her defense, no one had been home when she’d come back. Now, however, the lights are one and she can hear the obscured voices of her parents. (She can barely make out the words “shower” and “tired”, if she strains.) Thankfully, they haven’t come to look for her. She wonders if she’ll ever be able to look at her father in the eyes again. She’s already formulating a plan for sneaking out before breakfast -- or maybe pretending to sleep until after he leaves for work.

Until she is sure her parents have convalesced themselves upstairs, she’ll continue hiding outside on the back on the back porch swing -- how many summer nights did she spend out here growing up? She had attempted to distract herself from her complete and utter mortification by attempting to read, but the exploits of Natasha Rostova weren’t enough to ebb away her embarrassment. Now, she just sits and stews, swaying back and forth on the swing.

She wishes Gideon were here. After a minor freakout --

“This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.”

“Worse than that time you got stabbed in Agrabah?”

“Yes! I got healed from being stabbed! My dad caught be going down on my boyfriend. How do you come back from this?”

-- she and Gideon had decided to go their separate ways for the rest of the night. The mood had effectively been killed, and they had already agreed to spend the night at their respective childhood homes . She now wishes he were here, however, if only to give her a hug and share the mortification together. The text messages from him, of which there are many, are hardly sufficient. Besides, she hardly even wants to look at her phone anymore, not since she made a mistake of telling Neal, who has sent her three texts that consist of “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA” written over ad nauseum . Jerk.

Beyond embarrassment, she’s also incredibly disappointed in herself. The Juliet of four years ago had never been caught involved in illicit acts. Had she been caught vomiting into a bush after a night of underage drinking? Sure, but at least she’d been clothed and not hooking up with anyone. Has she fallen so far? Has living in New York eroded her sense in Storybrooke? The Juliet of four years ago would have insisted to sneak deeper into the library to fool around.

One thing’s for sure: I am never doing this in Storybrooke again.

She picks up her book again, and thumbs to the dog-eared page. Her adamant refusal to use a bookmark drives Gideon up the walls -- “Books are sacred, J.” The thought of him, and his exasperation, warms her heart and she makes a note to call him once she’s sure her parents are asleep. Slinking further into the swing, she attempts to read a bit more. It’s a mostly futile effort, and she’s about to give up when she is startled by the creak of the back door porch opening. She winces when she sees her father slide through.

“Hi.”

“Hullo, Cygnet.”

Juliet readjusts herself in the swing, swinging her legs to the ground so that he could sit beside her. She doesn’t meet his eyes when he sits down. She takes a deep breath, bracing for whatever lecture is bound to come, wishing he had somehow gotten the memo that this was something that they weren’t going to talk about. She had hoped that she and Gideon had gotten off the proverbial hook in that regard when her father and Mr. Gold had disappeared immediately after catching them, but apparently not.

“I’m guessing you’re not coming out here because you wanted to see the stars?”

“It’s a touch too overcast for that tonight, darling,” he replies, and there’s humor in his voice, but it is strained. God, this is the worst. “I wished for us to have a chat, not matter how awkward it might be.”

“Or we could pretend it never happened. I prefer that option.”

“When you were a toddler, you preferred to not wear clothes, so you stripped yourself in the middle of Granny’s, waving your dirty diaper as a victory flag. And yet your mother and I still dressed you,” her father replies, and he has the audacity to wink at her.

“Okay, that is so not fair.” It’s a story she’s heard maybe a hundred times by this point, but it makes her cringe every time. Why was she such an awkward child?

“I’ve learned from experience that life, unfortunately, isn’t fair.”

“Now you’re getting angsty,” she says. She’s being difficult. Juliet knows this, but she really doesn’t want to talk about whatever if on her father’s mind. She already feels terrible enough. “Dad, seriously, can we just forget today ever happened?”

“Trust me when I say I do, and after you and I have a chat, we can.”

“Dad, I’m an adult. We were just being dumb, okay?” Juliet feels like a teenager again, getting caught after staying out past curfew. But, to be fair, this is perfectly in character for her father. Years ago after a party, he’d caught her stumbling around clearly drunk. The next day he’d given her a lecture about the importance of staying safe while inebriated. “We’ll be more responsible from now on. Trust me when I say that no one involved wants a repeat of that. Ever.”

“That’s good. That’s good.” He runs his hand through his hair. “That’s not what I want to discuss.”

“Oh.” They sit like that for a moment, listening the sound of summer bugs and the creak of the swing swaying back and forth. When their respective awkward silence feels unbearable, Juliet asks, “So what did you want to talk about then?”

“As you’ve mentioned you’re an adult, and I have no bearing on telling you what you can and cannot do.” He takes a deep breath and looks up. “But now that you’re an adult, you are making adult choices and are finding yourself in adult situations.”

“Mom already gave me the sex talk in high school.” Her mother had been incredibly thorough with the sex talk, no doubt influenced by her own harrowing experience with teenage pregnancy. While she had done an excellent job discussing the different forms of birth control, Juliet had walked away so scarred by everything else that she’d done everything but penetrative sex until she had started college for fear of getting pregnant before her finishing her high school degree. “I know how to be safe. We’ve been tested. I have an IUD.”

Juliet winces at her explanation. Even though she’s veering into TMI territory -- her father knowing her current form of birth control does not top the ‘need to know’ list -- she wants to express to him that the earlier encounter had been a bit of fun and that she’s actually a responsible adult when it comes to these things.

“I’m glad you are aware of those things.” He runs his hand through his hair again. It’s also something Juliet does when she’s stressed. Both her mother and Gideon have commented on it. Unsure if it is a nature or nurture thing, she chalks it up to simply being Killian Jones’ daughter. “I just also want you to be aware that just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you have to if you. If you ever feel uncomfortable doing something, you can say no. You don’t need to...you don’t need to consent to an action simply because your partner--”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Gideon didn’t force me into doing anything. Holyshit, he’s not that kind of guy. I’m the one-- it was my idea, okay? He’s not some creep who would force me into that. This is not the time for that PSA.” Juliet pushes herself from the swing, turning to face her father. She’s angry and hurt and how could he even imply…? “Is it because of what we were doing? Newsflash, Dad, women can like giving head. Women can like sex. And I know this might be hard to hear, but I like sex. What you walked in on? That was me doing what I enjoy doing with my partner.”

To call her furious would be an understatement. She wonders how her father could even think that about Gideon. Gideon, who is the nicest person she knows. Gideon, who is so afraid of everything thinking he’s just another villain because of his last name. The implication that he would be the one forcing her, or that she would be so easily coerced boils her blood. And for it to come from her father?

She turns to leave -- to where, she doesn’t know -- but her father is up in an instant and following her. He gently takes hold of her arm, stopping her at the door. “Juliet, sweetheart, wait.”

“What, so you can imply my boyfriend is some asshole who forces me into sex?”

“No, so I can better explain what I was trying to say,” he tells her. Juliet doesn’t move at first, but he gradually leads her back to the swing. “It was not my intention to imply at Gideon was that sort of man. I honestly don’t think he is. I was talking about relationships the in general and not him specifically.”

“Well, it’s not like I’m doing a train on the hockey team.” Her father winces. She thinks it serves him right. “I’m kind of a big believer in monogamy.”

“That’s...that’s something. But even with the people we love, it’s easy for us to feel like we should do things that we normally wouldn’t want to do. And I don’t mean this situation specifically, but in relationships as a whole. I want you to know that it’s okay to say no,” he says gently. “You don’t ever have to do something you don’t want.”

“Again, I wanted to.”

“So you said.” He bites his lip and looks down. “I also want you to know that if you want to do something that your partner doesn’t, you should respect their decision, as well.”

“I know.”

“It’s easy to say when you’re not in the situation. And if you think your desires outweigh their own. And I’m not simply talking about what one might get into in their bedchambers, or libraries as it were. It extends to hospitals, how you raise your children, end of life care…” He trails off, before shaking his head. He turns so he can fully face her. “Juliet, darling, you’re growing up and making so many decisions, and now you’re making them now with a partner. I love you, more than anything you can comprehend, which is why I’m telling you these things. Adulthood isn’t simple, and strong emotions makes it even more difficult. What I’m trying, rather poorly it seems, is to say that it’s okay to communicate your desires, just as it is for he to communicate his, but both of you can say no and the other needs to respect it, aye?”

She’s unprepared to deal with the intensity of his speech. She’s been unprepared for a lot that has happened today, and she wants to deal with none of it. So she nods her head. “Yeah. Okay. Communicate. Have adult conversations. Is that all?”

“Yeah, that’s all.” He looks taken aback at her response. She regrets her, but he’s already up and walking to the door. “I think I’m going to turn in for the night. Don’t stay up too late, okay?”

And then he’s gone, and Juliet feels like the worst person ever.

“You aren’t the worst person ever,” Gideon tells her later that night, after she creeps into the house and back to her childhood bedroom. “Maybe a bit short. As much as I appreciate you defending my honor, based on what he said I don’t think he was meaning it that way. Or maybe it’s wishful thinking on my part.”

“I don’t know, I think he was trying to do the ‘Dad’ thing and make it like a sitcom feel-good moment.” In the immediate aftermath, once she had cooled off and really registered what her father had been saying, she had realized that maybe he hadn’t been implying what she thought he had. “And I yelled at him and then blew him off. I mean, he was being a bit weird about it with the sex stuff, but...I don’t know.”

“So what are you going to do about it?”

“What do you think I should do about it?”

“That’s not my call, babe,” he says gently. She hears a rustle over the line as he shifts in the bed. She wishes she were there with him, if only so she could feel the comfort of his warmth around her. “You know your dad. Do what you think is best.”

She just has to figure out what that means.

  -/-

  Emma is waiting for him in bed when he clambers into their bedchamber. Her hair, now wet, is pulled into a braid and she’s wearing an oversized t-shirt, but she still looks stunning. She closes the book she had been reading, and gives him a sympathetic look. “I heard yelling.”

“You heard correctly.” He strips off his clothes and brace, for once not bothering to fold them neatly into the hamper. Deciding not to wear his pajama pants, he crawls into bed and takes his spot besides his wife. “I’m not sure how well that conversation went.”

“I told you wait until morning.” Emma pokes him in the chest. “She’s mortified now. Nothing you said was going to register.”

“I didn’t want the moment to pass.” He interlocks his fingers with hers, and kisses her knuckles. “I’m afraid if I had waited until the morning, she would have snuck out. I’m not convinced she still won’t.”

“That does sound like our daughter.” They re-adjust themselves under the blankets so that Emma is laying on his chest. Killian feels his heart rate, previously pounding, slow as he succumbs to the comfort of her presence. “Even if it didn’t go well, I’m proud of you. You pushed past any awkwardness to have a real conversation with your kid.”

“I wouldn’t be so quick to say that. She accused me of implying her boyfriend was an abuser.”

“She also apparently likes sex,” Emma adds, humor evident in her tone.

“Don’t remind me.”

“You kinda of walked into that last one, buddy.” He feels Emma traces nonsense into his chest. It tickles, but he allows her to continue. She grounds him, that wife of his, keeping him afloat in the wild storm of his emotions.

“I walked into a lot of things today.” Things he would very much like to forget, regardless of what he told Juliet. He wonders if he might be able to convince Gold to whip them up a memory potion. He thinks the Dark One might agree.

“Yeah, I don’t envy you.”

“You are taking far too much joy in this situation.”

“What can I say, babe? It was a long time coming. Remember when mom walked in on us?”

“Which time?”

“Exactly.”

He laughs, but he doesn’t quite find the humor in the situation. He’s too caught up thinking about all the things he did wrong while talking to Juliet than right tonight. It had been easier when she was younger, far less prone to lash out. Back then, of course, the lessons hadn’t felt some complicated or embarrassing. Perhaps he misses that too, her willingness to listen and the faith that the advice he was imparting was done with her best interest at heart.

But that’s not how it works anymore, is it? She’s her own person. One who apparently likes sex and fools around with her partner in public spaces. And he doesn’t mind, not really, but today had been a stark reminder that she’s not his little girl anymore. He hadn’t been prepared for this part of fatherhood.

“Killian?” Emma says after a lifetime of silence. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Is it?”

“Yes. And you want to know how I know it is?” Emma moves that her chin is now resting on his chest. He catches a glint in her green eyes. “Because we’ve been down this road before, and everything turned out fine. Our daughter still comes home.”

“Why does it feel different than before?” he asks. Emma is correct, this isn’t the first time either of them have had a less than ideal encounter with their daughter. He still cringes when he thinks of the slammed doors and eye rolls from her teenage years.

“Because I think this is the first time it’s really sunk in for you that our baby isn’t a baby anymore.” Her words are a heavy weight on his chest as he considers them. Objectively, he recognizes that Juliet is an adult. She’s done well for herself living away from home and completing her studies. She hasn’t starved. But, Emma isn’t necessarily wrong either, and the incident earlier is a reminder of just how much she’s grown.

“You know, earlier I was telling the Crocodile I wished I could turn back time to when she was small. She used to be no longer than my forearm, do you remember that?” He’d been so delicate with her, so afraid of damaging something so small and precious to him.

“Of course I remember that.” Emma smiles fondly, the corner of her eyes crinkling. “Remember those bows my mom got her? The ones with flowers bigger than her face?”

“She would scream every time one of us tried to put it on.”

“You singing sea shanties was one of the only ways to get her to sleep.”

“Aye.” Tired as he had been, Killian cherished those moments he had with his infant daughter. She would be curled up on his chest as he rocked in a chair and hummed her his favorite songs. He felt special, being one of the only people who could calm her down. “I miss it.”

“I know, babe, but we’ve got a lot of new memories ahead of us.” Emma stretches up, leaving him feeling bereft, as she reaches to shut off the lamp. As his eyes attempt to adjust to the light, he feels her settle more firmly into her side of the bed. Unwilling to let her go quite yet, he turns to his side and wraps his arm around her waist.

“You were right about one thing, though.”

“Just one?”

“Hush,” he teases. “This one is different. Gideon, I mean.”

“And what makes you say that?”

Emma is goading him, but he doesn’t care. “You should have seen the fire in her eyes when she thought I was accusing him of being untoward. I’ve never seen her so defensive of anything or anyone in her life.”

“She’s in love.”

“Aye, she’s in love.”

Killian allows that sentiment to close out the night, and lets the evenness of Emma’s breaths slowly lull him to sleep. In the morning, he awakens to the sounds of someone rattling around the kitchen and the smell of pancakes wafting upstairs. He dresses quickly, pulling on the previously ignored pajama pants and a t-shirt before padding down the stairs. He expects to find Emma at the oven, but instead she is sitting at the table, drinking a mug of coffee. She casts him a knowing look and tilts her head to where their daughter is pouring batter into a sizzling skillet.

“Smells amazing, Cygnet.”

“Thanks, I made ‘em from scratch.” As the pancakes cook, she points with a spatula to a plate waiting for him. “You should get them while they’re hot.”

“As the lady insists.” He exchanges glances with Emma as he takes a plate of pancakes and settles into a chair. Rarely is Juliet ever awake this early on her own volition, let alone the one to making breakfast. After taking a few bites, he says, “These are excellent.”

“Thanks. I’ve been trying to learn how to cook, and ta-da.” Juliet flashes a wide smile -- Emma’s smile -- before turning back to her pancakes. Killian holds off on eating the rest, waiting until Juliet settles at the table with a plate of her own food and a glass of orange juice, extra pulp .

Emma excuses herself under the guise of needing to put on makeup, an obvious lie if he ever heard one. However, he can’t fault his wife for engineering an excuse for him and Juliet to be alone. His anxiety from the night before has slowly begun to ebb away knowing that his daughter did, in fact, not sneak out or intentionally sleep in to avoid him. She’s here and having breakfast. It’s the best he can ask for.

“What else are you learning how to cook?” he inquires, because he genuinely wants to know. This is a part of Juliet’s life he hadn’t initially been privy to with her living in New York. He’s eager to learn more.

“This and that. I make a mean pumpkin pasta sauce. If I’m up in the fall, maybe I can make it for you and Mom?”

“There’s nothing we would like more.” The hardest part of her growing older has been her absence. He’s proud that she has the confidence to leave home and forge a path of her own, but he misses her terribly. David had lucked out with both of his children living nearby. Killian has to settle for the occasional visit, mirror chats, or phone calls. The fact that she’s talking about visiting in a few months is a godsend.

She tells him more about the recipes she is learning how to cook -- caramel pie, enchiladas, various stews. He’s impressed, and he tells her as much.

“A girl’s gotta eat,” Juliet answers with a shrug. She pushes around some of the remaining pancakes on her plate. “Hey, Dad? About last night…”

He opens his mouth to apologize. Not for what he said, but instead for not yet coming to terms with her adulthood. Juliet, however, doesn’t allow him to finish. “Thanks for caring about me and everything.”

“You never need to thank me for that. I’m your father.”

“Yeah, but I want to,” she replies. He cheeks flush, and she pushes a few stray strands of hair behind her ears. “And, I didn’t say it last night, but I love you, Dad.”

“I love you too, Cygnet.”

Killian chooses not to press for any conversation surrounding last night anymore. He recognizes an olive branch when he sees one, and Emma’s advice about waiting is stilling lingering at the back of his mind. Instead, he asks his daughter her plans about the rest of weekend, and suggests that if they have time, her and Gideon should join he and Emma on the Jolly for a sunset cruise -- an olive branch of your own to say that he doesn’t actually hate her boyfriend.

“I’ll have to check, but that sounds fun,” she tells him.

Later, when they’re at station, Killian tells Emma all of this. He watches as her smile grows wider with each addition to the story, culminating on the tentative sailing excursion.

“I told you she would cool off.”

“To be honest, I’m a little surprised she did so quickly.” Since Juliet has inherited his temper, he had feared she would inherit his ability to hold a grudge. She certainly did when she was younger. As a teenager, she had perfected the silent treatment in a way that’s almost impressive. (For those not on the receiving end.”)

Emma simply gives him another one of her smiles and peck on the lips. “Well, yeah, our baby is growing up.”

He mutters something that sounds like agreement before giving his wife a kiss and returning to his work. He’s still not fond of his daughter being an adult, an absurd thought for something so inevitable and expected. But she’s happy. That’s what matters in the end.

[lalka-laski]

1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? Both 

2. What is home to you? Anywhere with my loved ones 

3. What was the last lie you told? Definitely something minor, I just can’t remember it. 

4. Does everyone deserve the truth? That’s a good question. I guess if an individual seeks/demands the truth then they deserve it. 

5. What is the creepiest toy ever made? FUCKING FURBY

6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. Where do I even begin? 

7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) Getting out of bed in the morning is actually much easier than I make it out to be. Yet I lay there for ages beforehand agonizing and dreading it. The same goes for working out and going to the gym. It’s all the lead-up that’s worse than the activity itself. 

8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? Several months ago I was doing some intensive therapy and EMDR to detach myself from traumatic memories. 

9. How many all nighters have you pulled? I’ve never counted, but not many. I love sleep too much. 

10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? Hand gestures maybe? Clapping? Jumping up and down? 

11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? Again, I’ve never counted. I will say I’ve had far more “flings” than actual relationships though. 

12. What is your paradise? Laying in bed next to my honey, a breeze from an open window chills the room but we’re cozy under the comforter. Our favorite candle is lit (Winter White Woods), and we’re silently reading our books, setting them down only to occasionally sneak a kiss. It’s my personal heaven. 

13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) Certainly NEITHER one of those, as they both drive me crazy. I like consistent white noise from a fan or AC or something.

14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? Beats me. 

15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? I don’t understand the question 

16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? Because they’re wealthier and more attractive than any average person could ever hope to be, and as a society, we prize those qualities. I also think many of us find it to fun to fantasize or live vicariously through beautiful, rich people. And to answer the second part of the question, I do care about celebrities but I try not to conceptualize them and remind myself that they’re still people. 

17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? Walk slowly in front of me in a store/other public place. 

18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? I sure do, but I’m working on it. I can be dramatic at times... The pros of this are that situations that worry me are never as bad as I envision them to be. But alternatively, that means things I hype up in my head aren’t as great as I imagine either. 

19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? Well I think every child in American public schools is forced to learn the recorder at some point. After that, I played the clarinet for a few years. Then as a teenager, I took “guitar lessons” with a friend of mine but we never did much guitar playing.... 

20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? I do! I prefer them to any other type of photo because I can control how I look in a selfie. 

21. List 3 things you like about yourself? My friendliness, my empathy, my neatness/organization. 

22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? I’ve been given lots of great advice over the years. I’m just bad at thinking on the spot... 

23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? I feel that I do. I have a very strong maternal nature, I love babies/children and I have a lot of experience caring for them. Of course, I know *raising* a child is much different than simply feeding/changing/playing, but I believe much of that is a “learn as you go” type of deal. 

24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? Cleaning helps me relax and feel better about my life. I also love taking hot baths, journaling, reading, vegging out in front of the TV or enjoying a glass of wine or two. 

25. When was the last time you felt awkward? The day I was born and I haven’t stopped since 

26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? I’m introverted in the sense that I value quiet and solitude, and I feel most at peace when I’m alone. But I have good social skills and (I think) I’m better at interacting with other people than most self-professed introverts. 

27. What constitutes a good friend? Loyalty, honesty, established trust. Similar interests and sense of humor are important too, IMO. 

28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? Just one best friend 

29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? Donald Trump, or anything related to him. 

30. What is your dream job? Writer 

31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? I like this question! There are success stories from both ends of the spectrum. The optimist in me wants to believe that hard work and grit will take you further than any natural talent will, and in many cases, this is true. However, I also believe in a “work smarter, not harder” approach. Sometimes cutting corners and accomplishing tasks in a more “lazy” way is more innovative. 

32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe? I’m not an animal person at all. I think because I’m a vegetarian and because I just have a sensitive, compassionate nature, people assume I’m an animal lover. In truth, I’d like most animals to keep their distance from me. 

33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? E v e r y t h i n g. 

34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? Wonderland 

35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. No thank you. Not worth the time. 

36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? That depends entirely on whose body I get. 

37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? Sell it. I’m poor. 

38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? The most formative class I can remember was 10th grade Advanced English. Prior to that, I was a bookworm and always excelled at reading comprehension in school. But it wasn’t until this class that I learned to deeply and critically analyze texts. To recognize the significance of a single word. To appreciate the power of just one detail of a scene or a story. It was in this class that I realized no element of a text is insignificant.  39. Name the last book you read. Currently reading “The Favorite Daughter” by Patti Callahan Henry 

40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? I’m an exceptionally emotional person so everything about my life would change. Everything!

41. When was the last time you made the first move? Almost never. It’s just not my style. 

42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? It’s not my taste 

43. What was the last movie you watched? I truly can’t remember 

44. Do you like and appreciate your life? I do! 

45. Do you like and appreciate yourself? Again, I do! 

46. When was the last time you cried? Couple days ago 

47. What are you scared of? Almost everything 

48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? I’m not going there... 

49. What are some of your hobbies? Reading, writing, crafting 

50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make? I mess up pronouns in conversation a lot. If I’m talking about 2 or more people, I might mistakenly interchange their pronouns. 

51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? I like to think so. Sometimes I’m maybe more distant than I should be and I’m usually not the person to arrange plans. But still, I’m reliable and loyal and I’m always available to lend an ear. 

52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? NOPE ha ha ha. 

53. What have you learned the hard way? Most lessons

54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? Love. Whether it’s from family, friends or a SO. I need to know I’m loved, appreciated and supported. 

55. Which medium do you use for expressing your artistic emotions? (Singing, writing, etc.) I’m a writer, so the written word is my preferred and most used medium. But I like to dabble in other art forms too: painting, drawing, crafts. And I sing A LOT, which could arguable be a form of emotional expression. 

56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? Creative 

57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done? Enroll in therapy 

58. What is your ideal meal? Mexican or Mediterranean 

59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? Tell me he voted for Trump or really anything of that nature. 

60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? A very select few. I love rabbits, deer, goats, cats. That might be it... 

61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? Those hidden fees when buying concert tickets online 

62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? Fast food. Really any kind of cheap, junk food that’s void of any nutritional value but tastes so fucking good I can’t resist. 

63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? Road work ahead? Uh yeah, I sure hope it does. 

64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? No, I was never into them. 

65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? I’m very happy to see beauty ideals (slowly) expanding to be more inclusive. But we still have a long ways to go

66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? Well 3/5 days of my work week require me to be up at 5:30 am. I usually cry and cringe when my alarm goes off, and sometimes continue to cry and cringe through my entire morning routine. But I often feel better once I get to work, and I like the idea of having the whole day ahead of me. Sometimes it’s nice being awake before most of the world. 

67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? Anyone who knows me knows I’m all about Sleeping Beauty/Princess Aurora. I actually love all Princess movies. Oh, and Toy Story. I live for Toy Story. 

68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? The city, I like the convenience of walking anywhere I need to go and/or using public transport. As a non-driver, it’s pretty crucial for me. 

69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? The ocean, I suppose. Though neither of those options really speak to me. 

70. What are the best things about winter? COZINESS. I’m talking fireplaces, fuzzy slippers, cozy jammies, lots and lots of blankets! 

71. What scares you most about the future? The uncertainty of it. 

72. What makes you feel old? Modern slang. I have no idea what “kids these days” are saying, and I feel like such a loser when I try to use trendy lingo in conversation. 

73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? Majority of my day 

74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? I don’t make them 

75. What is your life story in 6 words? Making it up as I go. 

76. Describe yourself in one word. Emotional 

77. What bad habits do you do? Worrying, over-thinking, obsessing 

78. What genre of music do you listen to? A variety. But most of my favorites could be categorized somewhere in the realm of rock/alternative/pop rock/soft rock. 

79. Most prominent childhood memory? My earliest memory was the birth of my sister, one day before my third birthday. And I would say it’s one of, if not the most, important memory of mine, considering her significance in my life and the bond we share. 

80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? I only have sisters, so my life would be VASTLY different if I had a brother. I learned a great deal from my older sister, none of which would’ve been possible if she were a boy. 

81. Spirit animal? Deer

82. Do you believe in horoscopes? To an extent. I think they’re entertaining more than anything, and I do believe they can be used as a tool for self-reflection, goal setting, inspiration etc. 

83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given? Hmm... 

84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. I’m gonna say “my babies:” Hannah, Aubrie and Samantha. 

85. Favorite memory of your family. Oh there are too many to list! It’s never a dull moment when we’re together... 

86. What do you look for in a relationship? Passion 

87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? Several 

88. What is your opinion on social media? I’m a fan, but I try to limit my usage or at least be mindful of what I’m consuming. 

89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? Realist? 

90. List some things that you think are overpriced? Medications of all kinds, feminine products or anything marketed specifically to women, vegetarian foods...  

91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? I don’t wanna go there 

92. What superpower would ruin the world? Mind-reading would cause a lot of issues I’m sure. 

93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? I can’t really think of anything 

95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? Poland or Iceland 

96. How do you approach people? That depends on the situation and environment but usually with a “hello” and a smile. 

97. What is your opinion on first impressions? I don’t believe they’re always correct. We all have off days. 

98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? I did a lot more outdoor activities as a kid than I do now.

99. What languages can you speak? English, a little Polish. 

100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? I’d like to say I can’t imagine it much worse than it is now but I’m not gonna tempt fate 

101. What do you do on your lazy days? Sleep late, stay in bed most of the day, sloth around. 

102. What ended your last relationship? He ended it, although I should have. We had too many differences that made a healthy relationship nearly impossible. And he was emotionally abusive, insulting and manipulative. 

103. Favorite food? Mexican or Mediterranean. I feel like I already answered this, no?

104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? ..... 

105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? I don’t get angry often. I get sad and upset, but not necessarily mad. 

106. What was the last friendship you broke? I can’t recall 

107. Do you have any pet peeves? Several 

108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? A client this morning 

109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? I’m easily stressed  so, every day. 

110. What part of your personality do you want to change? My anxiety 

111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? My friends and boyfriend are all equally influential 

112. What is your biggest motivation? Making my family proud

113. What did you want to be when you were little? An author/illustrator 

114. What are some things that you are good at? Writing 

115. What is one thing you want to be good at? Singing. I’m not bad, but I’d like to be *good* 

116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? THESE 

117. How important is privacy to you? Quite important. Nothing bothers me more than invasive, prying people. 

118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? Kindness 

119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? Uh... probably some ridiculous story I made up while drunk 

120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? I don’t have a “go-to” 

122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? Nothing comes to mind 

123. What is your morning routine? It depends on the day. Ideally, I get up and have a nice cup of tea and ease into my day. But more often than not, I hit snooze a hundred times and then end up rushing out the door with my hair unbrushed and my shoes barely on. 

124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering? It’s all worth remembering 

125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? Help. I think... 

126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" It’s not my game 

127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? Honesty is great, but sometimes it can mean hurt feelings. But it’s possible to be truthful while still polite. 

128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? Making plans with no follow-through, flirting with no actual intentions of taking things further (with the knowledge that the other party *would* like that). I don’t know though, I think often men accuse women of “leading them on” when they’re really not. 

129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? I don’t believe in the friend zone

130. What do you admire most about your friends? Their loyalty to me and refusal to give up on me

131. What do you admire most about your family? See above

132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" It’s not my forte 

133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? A healthy combination of both

134. When is it time to end a friendship? When it’s no longer serving you or providing anything positive to your life 

135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? I’d have to think about that

136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? I’m pleased with all the course I took 

137. What are your favorite baby names? Aurora Michelle for a girl. Levi Joseph for a boy. 

138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Yesterday 

139. What instantly ruins a conversation? An uninterested participant, someone who only talks but refuses to listen 

140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. I feel I’ve already answered this

141. Biggest disappointment. Uh

142. Do you have any self-restraint? Hardly 

143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? Moved into an apartment 

144. Prized possession(s)? My claddagh, a bracelet from Nora, my journal collection, many photographs 

145. What is your opinion on second chances? We all deserve them 

146. Text or call? TEXT TEXT TEXT 

147. What do you like about the 21st century? The internet is pretty great. I couldn’t imagine life without it.

148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? Focus more on school and less on partying 

149. How organized are you? Quite organized 

150. Favorite mode of transportation. Train

[moistwithgender]

Anime I think I remember watching this year

I need to keep better track of this I guess.

Aggressive Retsuko: Great! Very likable characters (even the bastards), just the right amount of millennial cynicism. 9/10 Aggressive Retsuko Christmas Special: It's not about Christmas, it's about instagram. It's great and extremely real (watch the series first though). Digimon Adventure tri 1 & 2: This is actually very boring so far. I planned to jump back in with the english dub, which is honestly how I should have been watching it from the beginning. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten around to it. Kado The Right Answer: If this show had not been sabotaged from the inside out in the last 2-3 episodes, this would have probably been up there with classics like Bebop. WEST WING: THE ANIME, we would have called it, or something. I haven't watched West Wing, but it's all bureaucracy, right? 8/10 in this universe, 10/10 in the alternate universe where it didn't shit the bed. Angolmois: I got halfway through this before the low budget and my own exhaustion had me drop it. Unfortunate, since anime never adapts the mongol invasion. Planet With: In the running for series of the year, probably. A super robot show where the ultimate moral is that, actually, rehabilitating your enemies is better than killing them. Will rewatch in the future, I'm sure. 10/10. Asobi Asobase: Hina Kino (Hanako)'s is going to go down as a legendary voice actress if I have any say in anything. Which I do, because I'm in charge of the industry now. Which means we're taking out queerphobic jokes, wrap it up people. 8/10, would rank higher without the bad takes. Cells at Work!: Really fun concept, has *implications* of a deeper narrative to be had built into the worldbuilding, but ultimately the whole season is just "oh I bet this irl thing would translate like this in my setting" on repeat. Still, an easy watch. 7/10. Hanebado!: There's a lot that could be good about this. Themes of toxicity in competitive spaces, overwork, abandonment, and trauma. Ending had a lot of people upset because it either miscommunicated how the protagonist moved past her trauma (best case), or just completely dropped the entire arc because...I don't know why. I rated this 9/10 on myanimelist, but it probably deserves lower. I'm still over here wanting to believe I missed something in my interpretation. Hoping for either a second season or a faster manga translation. My Hero Academia S3: This season had some high points but I felt it was considerably less interesting overall than the second season. However, Deku vs Bakugou was genuinely one of the best moments of the series thus far. My Hero Academia The Movie: Pretty standard shonen series movie for the sake of having one. Nothing groundbreaking here. But hey, I got to listen to "You Say Run" in a theater, which was almost worth the price of admission on its own. 6/10. Ushio & Tora: Both seasons, thirty nine episodes. Waste of my time! Maybe this series was just meant to be consumed bit by bit, but I just found it really shallow in the end. 6/10. Chio's School Road: Another *brilliant* comedy that is ultimately brought down by the occasional queerphobic humor. Get it toGETHER, guys! In any case, I care about these stupid children now, and hope for a season two soon. 8/10. Angels of Death: It took about 14 out of the total 16 episodes before I suddenly stopped hate watching it and started laughing at its unwarranted self seriousness and paradoxical writing. Still, kind of frustrated I stuck with it anyway. 4/10. Night is Young, Walk On Girl: Gorgeous movie that has to be seen, but. I wonder if it's Yuasa or the original writer of these books that insists on the resolution to all conflict being "heterosexuality". 9/10. Haibane Renmei: I got four episodes in before the Funi/Crunchy split happened ;__; it's really good tho Dragon Pilot: Definitely gonna rewatch this one one day too. There is a density of theme and execution here that I cannot yet fully unpack and it's just so good. Also the english dub is good, and is how I preferred to watch it. It also has a lesbian and isn't afraid of her, even if her role is very small. It's something. 9/10, maybe 10/10. Mirai: I fucking love Mamoru Hosoda's films. 9/10. Zombieland Saga: I have the sneaking feeling that they wanted a few more HOT PROGRESSIVE TAKES to be fit in before the season ended, but restraints got in the way. We had a sex worker idol who never got her backstory episode, and actually Tae never got hers either. It's still a 9/10 for me, but I'm hoping for at least a followup OVA. And a movie. Granblue Fantasy: I finished the full season, save for the "omake" episode that I assume takes place in the alternate universe where Protagonist Is Girl. This was somewhat throwaway cozy saturday morning nostalgia for the old days of Final Fantasy before that game series became more grounded in contemporary and sci-fi settings. It was also something I watched as a primer for the incoming Platinum and ArcSys games, because I'm not gonna play two gacha games at the same time. Hilariously, the--like--twenty new characters from the gacha that showed up in the last episode were all more interesting than the cast of the full season. 7/10, 10/10 for having a race of hot girls with horns (there are also guys but who cares). Hi Score Girl: This show is a love letter to growing up with arcades in 90s Japan and also struggling with making friends and ohhh my god every time the idiot main boy stops paying attention to important interpersonal plot and just starts infodumping about a game, I tragically see myself. It's very good, the girls are GOOD GIRLS and deserve better and the writing seems fully aware of that.  The series unfortunately ends on a stock romantic plot beat cliffhanger that I have to wait until March to have ultimately resolved in THREE EPISODES. Despite that, it's easily a 9/10. I list a lot of 9/10s but it's been a good couple seasons and there's just...a lot of range there. Number scores are bullshit. Watch anime. Shin Getter Robo: Probably the last show I'll have finished before the year end. It's my second exposure to Getter Robo (my first was reading Getter Robo Go, which actually takes place after this), and it's still good, but oh god. These guys are dumb bastards but there's a note early in that has aged particularly badly in the MeToo era. Not sure if the show got better because I switched audio tracks to English with VAs I have nostalgia for, or because they broke through the bottom of a lake and wound up in alternate history Heian era Japan, stranded for multiple years. With a giant robot. I liked that part. 8/10. Shows I took a break from due to burnout and need to pick back up: Run with the Wind, Rascal Does Not Dream of Bunny Girl Senpai, Vento Aureo, SSSS.Gridman, Hinomaruzumou, Ms. Vampire who lives in my neighborhood, As Miss Beelzebub Likes It., Devilman Crybaby, That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime, Skull-face Bookseller Honda-san. SO MANY!!

[unnursvanablog]

Bridgerton, s2 / tv show review

This is just my opinions on the second season of Bridgerton. Little to no spoilers below!

Bridgerton is made after a very popular book series by Julia Quinn that I have not read. It's not really my go to genre when it comes to books, but I am a sucker for this sort of romantic period dramas when it comes to tv shows and movies because for some reason I enjoy watching romance rather than reading it.

There is something quite cozy about these romantic period dramas or just the romance genre in general. The plot isn't big or bold, it's quite simple but there are fun, colorful characters, funny and witty moments and then a whole lot of longing and pining. It's just two people falling in love and then the people in their lives. We know about the happy ending that's coming and we know we are going to have a good cozy time.

That’s the charm to those stories and why people who tend to gravitate towards them a lot of the time. And Bridgerton just does that well. It's entertaining, fluffy, and colorful. It's just does period drama romance in such a soapy and fun way, but I also feel like they manage to do something new and exciting with it, with the story of the Sharma sisters and their addition to the story that does add something more to the story.

This second season felt a lot more standard period romance as it did not sex up the story as much as they did last season. This season wasn't as much about lust or attraction rather than mutual pining and enemies to lovers’ sort of story, which is way more up my alley. That's the sort of romance that I tend to crave most in my rom-coms.

This season does the whole 'enemies to lovers' trope so very well. I was worried that I would not like Anthony as a love interest, because I wasn't so found of him first series, but this season really did so much for his character and backstory, so you gain more sympathy for him and understand why he is the way he is. And I think Jonathan Bailey just has this wonderful charm to him that really works it's wonders on you. But the real charm to the whole thing is Kate Sharma and the chemistry between them that makes you truly root for Anthony in the end.

Which I think is one of the most important aspects of this type of male archetype; you start to love them through the main female character, and you like him through them. He makes her happy, she loves him, and there for you do too. You fall for him through her, and you want them to end up together because of it. Or that's how it usually is for me. Kate is a great character, I loved her, her sister and just their whole dynamics was such a wonderful b-plot to the whole story.

I must admit however that one of the few minus points of the second season of Bridgerton was some of the many plots they were trying to juggle. It had a bit of a hard time finding a balance between all the different plot lines of the Bridgerton siblings, the Sharma sisters and there were episodes in the middle of the series where very little seemed to be happening and the story went in circles. It slowed down a bit because of all these different plots and it distracted from the main story. But it still managed to be this wonderful escapism and fantasy that these romantic stories are at their core. It's very hard to stop when you start this. The shows know their viewers quite well and it shows, it hit's most of it's marks when it comes to this period romance genre. And it pays off.