#( after killing his dad and then having his mother and uncle die he's got knife in hand like- )

[lunatrics]

Aleksey is unofficially with the House of the Hearth and he has no relation to anyone from the orphanage, no one wanted to be n e a r him and his entire purpose from the beginning was get me into the ranks, scrawny boy on the streets with a chaotic, ravage look in his eyes and was like, I'll kill and I'll do it better. He will call the Knave 'father' so, so underhandedly, but with that sweet, I am playing along tone, that you know she knows what he wants deep down. they shook hands when he was a child, because same hat. damn you just as crazy get in here son. jokes aside, I love him also hating any connection to the house of the hearth and he doesn't mention it, no familial bond, no respect for being taken in because he wasn't, he forced his way like a rampaging bull. He only speaks to the Knave, everyone else is beneath him ; they all are, but the harbingers at least get his act that he then seethes in disgust about because all of them will fall along with the gods and snezhnaya should be reigned over by humanity, but only if it's him at top.

[casspurrjoybell-24]

The Alpha's Boy - Chapter 1 - Part 2

Book Two In : The Alpha's Trilogy

*Warning - Adult Content*

Alistair 'Star' Claymore-Phoenix

Ivan was my rock, my sunshine on a cloudy day.

When I'm down, he was there to make me feel better.

I've spiralled out of control, more than once and when everyone thought I was at my breaking point, Ivan was there, to show me things could get better.

I watched as Silas took a knife and started slicing the cake, putting the first and biggest slice in front of me, then handed all the other slices to the crowd around us.

We didn't have an overly big family but the Autumn Falls' pack was large, one of the largest actually.

I'm sure it would be bigger had my uncle been here but he's been missing for years and if anyone had so much as said his name, Dad was likely to get emotional and the mood to the party would die.

Ivan bounced over to me, putting an arm around my shoulder and planting a kiss on my cheek.

I groaned, rubbing the feel of their cherry lip gloss off my face.

"How dare you rub off my kiss," Ivan said, a mock disappointment in their tone.

I looked up at him, he was flawless.

His eyes were a calming hazel mixed green, that always looked like they could see into your soul and his face was his 'best feature' as he liked to say.

Back when we were in junior high Ivan got into makeup and honestly, he killed it, his fake eyelashes were the perfect length.

He could go on for hours telling me about blush, contour, eye gunk and all that stuff.

I didn't really care about it but I sat there and listened as he went on and on.

I've spent more hours waiting for him to put his face on, then I have been waiting years, for words to come out of my mouth.

"Happy Birthday you mother-fucking Star-boy," Ivan said, with a laugh.

I glared at him.

'You're not funny,' I signed.

Over the last few years, everybody that I had contact with, went out of their way to learn ASL, which should have made me feel special but really all it did was make me feel awkward and embarrassed.

Sure it was cool that people knew what I was saying but I couldn't help the feeling of it being a burden on everyone.

It was fun teaching my Papa how to sign as Darren always made jokes while we did it and signed the easiest things wrong.

Silas already knew ASL when I had met him, so together we taught Darren, he also helped me teach Ivan.

Some people thought of me as special, that I had my own language.

They thought it was so cool but really, it was far from it.

I longed to laugh with my friends, swear at them, joke with them in a loud group.

I wanted to join in on the screaming contests my little brothers held.

I didn't want everyone to stop and pay attention when I wanted to speak, I just wanted to go with the flow.

I wanted to be like everybody else, so why didn't I wish for that?

Why did I wish to find my mate?

Because I'm fucking realistic that's why.

Darren and Silas had taken me to as many doctors as they could find to try and see if 'anyone' could fix my vocal cords but it was useless.

They were shot, scar tissue was built up, they were healed in the wrong place, fused to another part of my throat.

It would be more damaging to me to go in and try to fix them and the odds of them actually working again were slim to none.

So no, I wasn't making a wish for my voice, besides, when I was phased in my wolf form it was there.

That little voice in my head, it joined into the many other voices around us, a good reason to spend most of my time in my wolf form actually.

Hence why I went for runs most nights, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends because I wanted others to hear me.

I wanted to howl at the moon like the animal I was, I wanted to chew the head off my Father and Dad for embarrassing me and during those moments, I could.

"Now, how about we go for a little drink after this lame gig and get the real party started," my friend Liam said, putting a hand on both Ivan and my shoulder and leaning his head in between us, trying to lower his voice enough to not be heard by my nearby parents or Grandfather but honestly, Liam was a dumb-ass if he thought he could keep a secret around here.

Just as the words passed his lips, my Father and Pack Alpha, Silas glanced over at the three of us with a brow raised, while Dad let off a low chuckle shaking his head.

Ivan lets out a loud laugh as well, just as my Father was about to walk over.

"No way Lee. My big boy and I have plans to crash at my place after this and he's going to see if he can beat my high score in classic Pac-Man. Which is going to take all night because he can't."

With Liam saying that, I watched as my father turned back to Papa and start talking again about Malachi's upcoming therapy session.

'Be outside my place at 10:30' Ivan signed, with a smirk checking around to make sure nobody was actually watching us.

I wanted to snicker along with him, laugh with my friends but I just had to nod and smile, hating the feeling at turned inside me.

I look over, as my eyes met Rudy's who's stood across the room with our friend Declan.

I nodded my head to the right, indicating that I wanted to see him outside.

I got out from my place at the table, telling Ivan and Liam, I would be right back, before sneaking out the back door, with Rudy following not far behind me.

Rudy and I didn't always get along, he had Ivan had gotten close once upon a time and it had admittedly made me jealous.

It was during one of my bad spots, Rudy and I had learnt to work together, on some parts of our relationship.

I walked out of the back-yard of my house, enjoying the cold night air.

It was only eight-thirty but the sun still fell behind the skyline.

The wind was chilly but it was to be expected for January.

"How much did you need?" Rudy asked, digging into his back pocket and pulling out a small baggy.

'Two should hold me over, until I can get to Taylor tomorrow.'

[albino-whumpee]

Im gonna write it down for posterity

CW// graphic violence descriptions, mutilation, gore, murder, death of an infant, prostitution, cannibalism, blood, guts and all types of insides, boiled alive, skinned, etc, I’m sorry but this is too fucking graphic.

It’s kinda fading (thank god) but it was something like this.

For some reason a part of a hospital worked as a brothel and my father worked there, so I had to go and give him some stuff. So when I went there I saw all the girls like in open cells and they were quite literally set next to the delivery rooms. The hospital was dirty af and some of the doctors went in while I was leaving some of the stuff on one of the girl’s cells. They began talking with me while my father was there. It was all about why not becoming one of the girls. They needed replacements because some were already old and getting less clients.

I said no way in hell and prepared my stuff to leave. For some reason I had to give one of the girls my shirt and so I asked my dad if he could lend me his, so I wouldn’t have to be nude. He was like “hm? I got places to go, bye. Thanks for coming” and just went off.

Oh I was so pissed, but hell, if my fucking father is useless, then I can call my mother and she will help right? No. Wrong. She came, she was wearing a sweater and a shirt, but she refused to give me one. So, I’m honestly so angry I go around the hospital looking for anything to cover myself with and just go.

That’s when things get nasty cause I see all type of hyper graphic stuff, including new born babies being tossed like sausages to their mothers and even my uncle having enormous glass shards stuck on his body. I forget I’m half naked and go after him cause he’s crying but no doctor around. So m trying to stop him and get him on a stretcher when he just keeps walking and he falls.

But when he falls and starts walking again something like a scythe starts making sashimi of him. I usually feel pain in my dreams and this wasn’t the exception, so even tho muted, fuck, I felt all of him being sliced until he was just some torn up rag on the floor. I was the first thing to touch the floor when he fell too, so I was immediately killed. However, the dream continued, just like a movie. And instead followed one fo the doctor’s life.

He got a wife and a child and a nice house, but seemed like they both hated their guts because while she was cooking dinner, they got into a big insane fight. The woman is so angry and the child doesn’t stop crying, so she pulls him on the table, but the noise and everything begin to distort while she slaps the husband and he goes away while she angrily continues to cook dinner, which was turkey. She’s very entranced on cooking because her in laws are coming too. But while she’s cooking, the sound of her child screaming stops.

She is cooking so happily then. She is so proud of the stuffed turkey she is making and the soup and the salad look amazing. She just has to answer the door when it rings. But when it does, it’s her husband screaming at her.

She goes back to the kitchen and slowly her sight stops being this milky tint and starts showing the room filled with blood. Like flashbacks she starts seeing what really happened. How she killed her husband with a knife, first gutting him, pushing him into the sink so he would bleed and when the kid was bawling, how she out him on the table, into a pan and then poured boiling water over him. The boy didn’t die right away and nor did the husband, it took a while for them to actually stop moving, but by then she had already gutted the husband, out him on the table to stuff and dress with gravy while his ribs actually showed because she had skinned him. So this grotesque picture of his legs laying discarded while his hands were tied up as turkey’s legs and his head bobbed up in the sink was enough to make me shiver and half wake up, but it wasn’t done.

I had to see the baby boy’s corpse horrendously cut open and stuffed with fruit too. His body was charred because of the water and the woman didn’t remember what she had done, so when she entered the kitchen and saw the “turkey” she was desperate to find she didn’t do it to her son too, that’s when she saw herself pouring the boiling water when the boy didn’t stop screaming and crying and then get so happy because there was finally silence.

I thought she would crumble then, but she was like, stunned silent for a second before looking down at her dress, obviously not the clean thing she thought it was and then she took her dress’ skirt in each hand and twirled. She was smiling while swaying her bloody dress.

She was so happy, when the door rang, she went to open it with a smile. Even when her mother in law entered, searching for her son and grandson, she was really calm when she told her “they’re on the kitchen”

She laughed her ass off when the woman entered the kitchen, saw the scene and before she could actually scream, the woman killed her too.

She ate dinner very happily too.

And while that pov ended with a family therapy session talking about it like some case study that was relevant to the session, I was honestly too shocked. I just wanted to wake up already, so luckily, I did.

I know words about a nightmare are pretty stupid, but I’m not drawing that. I have seen grotesque and graphic stuff in my dreams for years, but this was by far the most graphic, explicit one.

Had the worst, most graphic nightmare I’ve had in years and I’m absolutely disturbed with what my brain came up with

[thenixkat]

HCs and OCs for a fic

Toyomitsu family: Descended from one of the first giant mutants in Japan. Tend to have monster or animal related transformation quirks in addition to being huge. Own farmland and forested areas all over the Kansai region. The family founded the Devil’s Market yakuza group which has been extremely long-running and focused on buying and selling illicit goods, general goods, and general supplies and labor for larger people. A Toyomitsu has been either the boss or first lieutenant of the Devil’s Market for as long as it’s existed. They had to move out of their Osaka base when All For One set up shop, their current main base of operations is in Esuha city. The family also runs a franchise of butcher shops across most of Japan under the name of Oni Meats which carries a vast selection of animal protein from around the world. Nearly all members of the family have prey drives from their monstrous transformations.

Ma- Manami- (Quirk) Bugbear- transformation quirk. If the user is sufficiently fat then they can transform into a hybrid bear/reptile monster. Has great senses and night vision as well as enhanced strength. Can induce fear by staring someone directly in the eyes. -->Prefers not to be involved with the less legal dealings of the family and Devil’s Market. She’s more than capable of being as much of if not more a terrifying mob boss than her little brother. She just likes farming better. -->Generally doesn’t look people in the eyes unless she doesn’t like them b/c her terror-inducing power stays active regardless of her form. She prefers not to scare folks who don’t deserve it. -->Gets on very well with her sister-in-law, if she wasn’t married she’d steal her brother’s wife. -->Met her husband in a fighting ring. She eviscerated him with her claws and he broke one of her arms and several of her ribs. They started talking while getting patched up. -->Is about 7’10” and built like a well-padded brick house. -->Is the one who judges new recruits into the gang. Tends to have them do farm work for at least a month to get a bead on their personalities.

Pa- Noel ‘Blue Devil’ Diablo nee Toyomitsu- (Quirk) Energy absorption- emitter quirk. Can absorb, temporarily store, and redirect kinetic/thermal/electric energy. Too much energy kept in the body for too long causes reckless and impulsive behavior and hyperactivity. Devil- mutant quirk. Has devil-like horns and a tail. -->Used to be a nomad b4 settling down with his strong beautiful wife. Supported himself on his travels with fighting, gambling, handyman skills, and musical skills. -->Brings nothing to the table in his household other than his good looks, good nature, and knack for fixing things and a broad range of skills. -->Holding in excess energy makes him glow blue, especially his horns. -->Loves his family just so much. Is the goofy dad and great flirty husband. -->Loved to carry his kids until they got waaaay too big for him to pick up. Stands on a char to talk to his kids and wife on their level. B/c they are just so damn tall. -->Is 6 ft tall with a strong build with very little body fat b/c of a side effect of his quirk. He gets cold easily b/c of this and it bothers his joints.

Grandpa- Ryuji ‘The Dragon/ Dread Emperor of Giants’ - (Quirk) Dragon- transformation quirk. Can transform into an eastern dragon or humanoid eastern dragon with the severity of the transformation depending on percentage of body fat. Can also control the weather. -->Controlling the weather means that his farms never have a bad year. He does sell this service on the black market through the Devil’s Market. -->Wanted to be a hero when he was young and stopped when his mom got sent to jail for vigilantism and murder for stopping a serial killer from preying on women in the community -->Retired after a betrayal from some too ambitious underlings lead to a crippling knee injury. Still acts as a source of wisdom for the family and the gang. -->Is the go-to babysitter. -->Prefers to be in his transformed state and hates the anti-public quirk use laws with a passion. -->His full dragon form is as long as a bus and can fly. His humanoid dragon form/human form (sans antlers) is 8’5”

Grandma- Akane- (Quirk) None. -->An ex-mercenary who beat Ryuji in his prime AND in his full dragon form with nothing but some rope and her bare hands. -->Very good with guns and knives -->Takes advantage of the fact that as a plump quirkless woman she tends to get overlooked by people with powers to end fuckers. -->Was the one who got rid of the over-ambitious underlings who attempted a coup against her husband. -->Is about 5’10”, very chubby, wears glasses, and is rather soft-spoken. -->Is an icon to the quirkless members of the Devil’s Market and teaches them how to fight people with powers.

Uncle- Wani ‘The Butcher’- (Quirk) Crocodilian- transformation quirk. Similar to grandpa but crocodile instead of dragon. Has a great sense of smell and hearing as well as night vision. Is bulletproof at full strength. -->A strong proponent of community defense to the point where more people came to him about community issues than go to police or heroes. He gets problems handled permanently. -->Also heavily invested in technology and occult studies to see if there was a way to make life easier for people -->Also prefers to be in his transformed state -->Caught and ate 3 quirk diagnosing doctors in the area who were trafficking children into human experimentation. Managed to rescue most of the kids. -->Was arrested and sent to Tartarus for a string of killing corrupt cops and heroes fucking around in his neighborhood. His family often visits him. -->Fell for his wife when she bet him she could drink him under the table with the loser paying the tab. She won. -->Is about 8 ft tall and at least half as wide b4 going to jail. In prison he rapidly lost weight, the family is planning a jailbreak.

Auntie- Jay ‘Jaybird/Hummingbird’ Johnson nee Toyomitsu- (Quirk) Fast Twitch- emitter quirk. A speedster type. Can move and think at superhuman speeds for a few minutes at a time every hour. Has a very high metabolism and needs to consume large amounts of food in general. -->Was a villain before settling down. Still pulls off a robbery every now and then and has a fondness for gems. -->A Black American who came to Japan to hide from law enforcement after a heist gone wrong. -->Thinks that the way people throw the word villain around to just about any fucker committing any kind of crime while using a quirk really dilutes the word. Thinks that villains need fun costumes and proper themes and intent. -->Her sister-in-law was one of the first women she’s ever met who never criticized her eating habits and she would kill for the other woman. Ride or die friendship. -->Is constantly hungry due to her speedster metabolism and has to eat a lot. -->About 5’8” and leggy with plenty of visible muscle.

Sister- Onini ‘Oni/Gargoyle’- (Quirk) Gargoyle- transformation quirk. Can transform into a stone-skinned gargoyle with the severity of the transformation being dependant on amount of body fat. Heat Sink- emitter quirk. Can absorb, store, and release thermal energy. -->Tried to become a hero but was bullied out of school -->Named after one of her mom’s friends -->Considers cousin Kenji to be effectively one of her brothers -->Became a firefighter and uses her quirks on the job even tho it’s illegal. Not like the people she’s saving are gonna complain. -->Tends to flirt with strong women. -->Actually tends to stay partially transformed b/c she likes having a tail and passes herself off as a mutant -->If she gets too hungry and loses control she can become a heat vampire and freeze things to death while feeding on their body heat. -->Spends a lot of time helping out on the farm and her mother is most likely to pass ownership of the family land to her once she retires. -->The most likely person in her generation of the family to have biological kids. --->Keeps teasing Fatgum about when he’s gonna officially adopt his interns. -->Is about 7’5” and technically is too heavy to fly but she glides pretty well.

Cousin- Kenjiro ‘Kenji/Ken/Shuten’- (Quirk) Fast Oni- transformation quirk. Can transform into an oni with enhanced speed and strength. Transforming causes his metabolism to speed up and he burns fat to stay in oni form. Has a speedster metabolism in regular form, if he doesn’t eat a substantial meal every 5 hours he starts losing weight (fat and muscle) rapidly and is consequently always hungry. -->Would love to stay in his transformed form but can’t due to the timer. -->Is jealous of Taishiro’s height and metabolism so he makes fun of the way Tai’s face looks when he’s transformed. Also jealous of Onini’s ability to not be constantly hungry. -->Is constantly hungry from the day his quirk came in and had to take appetite suppressants during puberty to keep from losing his head and chowing down on anything and anyone in reach during his growth spurts. -->Has been mistaken for Fatgum more than once due to their similar-ish size and clothing choices. It frustrates him to no end b/c he’s way darker than Tai and prefers wearing blue or white. -->Has intentionally eaten people. Most notable example being him ending a war with a rival yakuza group by capturing, butchering, and cooking the rival leader and openly serving him for dinner at the peace treaty/gang merger. -->Strongly supports Fatgum as a hero and the two combine resources to help the community whether that is through funding housing for the homeless or getting a very good tailor the resources to make clothing for specific clientele or sending the other to deal with a situation appropriately. -->Brings a knife to a gunfight b/c he’s a superstrong speedster and a gun ain’t go do shit if you ain’t got no hands. -->Thinks Overhaul is a stupid asshole b/c it’s not that hard to get blood out of a kid or train a kid to be ok with it. -->Is about 7’10” and has heard every short joke under the sun from Tai

Fatgum-Taishiro ‘Tai’- (Quirk) Fat Absorption- Transformation quirk into an uncanny valley cartoony blob man that is as strong as the amount of body fat he has. Can absorb, neutralize, or release kinetic energy. Eyes glow in the dark like a cartoon when his quirk is active. Has a great sense of taste and is incapable of feeling sated/is always hungry. Also has an extremely efficient digestive system that breaks food down in seconds. Can also convert fat into muscle as well as generally having enhanced strength and speed while transformed. -->Was a late bloomer. His quirk didn’t start coming in till he was 8 and it took a while b4 he was fat enough for it to have notable effects. -->Preferred being in his skinnier form during middle and high school due to bullying and self-esteem issues that he didn’t work through until his early twenties. -->Started high school at 5’7” (170 cm) at 14 yrs old and was 8’2 (250 cm) when he graduated at 18 yrs old. Puberty was hell and pants were his enemy. -->Had a friend in hero support who took it as a personal challenge to make him clothing that he couldn’t destroy, that would grow and shrink with him, and that he couldn’t outgrow heightwise either. Ended up inventing ‘indestructible pants’ and making bank. -->Does not have canine teeth due to a mutation related to his quirk. Does have several rows of teeth that can replace themselves like a shark’s due to the same mutation. The fuckery of his mouth is only really noticeable if he’s ‘stretching’/pushing his transformation to its fullest extent or if someone’s feeling around inside of his mouth for whatever reason. -->Does not have a gag reflex -->Has been constantly hungry since his quirk emerged and like Kenji had to take appetite suppressants during his growth spurts to keep control of himself. An asshole classmate once replaced his appetite suppressants with appetite stimulants to see what happens. Several people ended up hospitalized, Taishiro still has nightmares about it and said asshole student actually managed to get expelled. Has a restraining order against said asshole classmate who fucked off to England to be a hero there. -->Is so glad he’s done growing. Went through clothes like water when he was a teen. -->Going several days without getting enough calories in tends to activate his prey drive and he really doesn’t like that b/c heroes shouldn’t murder or maul people. Figured out this aspect when he mauled a bully after his quirk just came in and later during a survival training exercise in hero school in which he ended up eating a live bear after several days of living on trail rations (scared his teammates for life with that one). -->A lot of aspects of his costume with the bright colors and friendly mannerisms is to reduce the intimidation factor/terrifying aspects of his appearance. He is aware that in his transformed state he’s a giant uncanny valley cartoony egg man monster that can fucking absorb people into his body. -->While transformed his limb, mouth, and eye proportions are extremely fluid and change nearly at will. If he wants to his face can be entirely mouth, which he knows is terrifying to other people. His arms and legs can rubber hose it though they aren’t as strong when he does that, does mean he can grab from angles that shouldn’t be possible. -->Was bullied as a kid for being ‘quirkless’ b4 his quirk manifested and then he was bullied for being fat. It did a number on his self-esteem as a teen leading him to prefer using his thinner form as his default. -->His thinner form was considered a heartthrob in school to his frustration. Didn’t mean he didn’t take advantage of the fact people found him hot to make money or flirt a free lunch off of someone. Was in a hot guy calendar made and distributed by one of his classmates. -->It absolutely gets on his nerves when people only find his skinny form attractive. -->After graduation, he lost muscle b/c that starter hero paycheck ain’t shit and the Hero Commission refused to let him write off food costs as business expenses. Had to save his food money for patrols leading to him losing weight. -->Participated in underground fighting rings to both make some money on the side and get better at using his quirk -->Has tried Trigger b4 and carries a small vial of the good version of it just in case he really needs it one day. (Listen, you ain’t finding shit trying to pat down fucking Fatgum) -->While transformed the absorbing things into him thing is automatic, put too much pressure on the flabbier parts of his body and you’ll just sink in. It takes effort to release things and took him a while to learn how to do this as a kid. Before he learned how to release things, he’d just turn off his quirk to get things out of him. -->Was blackmailed into working for the cops after getting caught during a raid of one of the fighting rings he was participating in. Decided to be a double agent and give away info on cases to the Devil’s Market to help them stay ahead of the cops. Also blew a decent chunk of the Osaka police force’s budget on his feeding since they wanted to use him. Ultimately this is what caused the police to break their partnership with him b/c he was too damn expensive to keep on the payroll. -->Once he became decently popular he and the Devil’s Market started funding a superhero trade school to get people who otherwise wouldn’t be able to get into hero schools for various reasons trained up and educated enough to get a hero license. -->As a hero he just doesn’t enforce the dumber laws like anti-public quirk use laws b/c who cares if people use their quirks if they aren’t hurting anyone. Also prefers not to label criminals as villains unless they’ve done some truly heinous shit b/c he knows that villains get harsher punishments in the justice system. Is also a strong proponent for rehabilitation for criminals. -->Once got caught in a scandal where he and a close friend and classmate managed to get a quirkless friend of theirs enrolled in their hero school with the help of a hacker. It took months for the school to catch on, during which said quirkless friend excelled in the hero classes. Fatgum and his friend nearly got expelled when caught. Later he helps that quirkless friend get a provisional hero license to become Japan’s first quirkless hero. -->From his family history, to his accent, to his size, to his ancestry Fatgum got torn apart by the media when he first started making waves. It took years but his image as a fun friendly beloved hero won out over ‘loose canon with criminal ties who’ll probably turn villain any day now’ -->Most of his sidekicks are folks he knew in his underground fighting days or rehabilitated criminals. Sidekicks and interns from actual hero schools are picked based on both potential as well as ‘how well can you bend the law/see in shades of grey instead of black and white?’. Essentially interning with Fatgum is a long process of unlearning propaganda and a practical application of morality on a case by case basis. -->Is aware of the hornier corners of his fandom and doesn’t know how to get them to understand that death via snusnu is not a way they want to go out (“How do you know this?” “...No comment.”) and telling them that they would def either die or require medical attention only makes them hornier. He finds it distressing and tries to avoid these people. -->Only found out that his name and birthday were puns when he was in middle school. He was not pleased. His parents had a blast since they were waiting for him to figure it out. -->When transformed his face, hands, feet, knees, and elbows are the most vulnerable parts of his body. Hence the leg armor (and occasionally arm armor). -->Due to his size, he’s got a few glaring blind spots, the main one being that he simply can’t see past his belly when looking down. He has tripped over short people b4 b/c of this. At least one of his friends from school would take advantage of this when he was in his larger form to sneak up on him.

[spacedaddymando]

All Heart and Beskar : Chapter 2

Synopsis - A bounty hunter turned bounty, you find yourself as the assistant to one of the most feared bounty hunters in the galaxy, and his little green child with big ears.

A/N - This is long!! I’ve written and rewritten this chapter all week because there was just so much I wanted to do! I hope you enjoy it, and please leave feedback if you want! 

Warnings - 18+, descriptions of violence and death. 

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 

[7.7k words] Chapter 2 - Long Days, Dark Nights

dar’manda - Not Mandalorian (used in this context that the character is no longer Mandalorian). Udesii - Calm Down Hut’uunla - Cowardly

Mando had apparently gone to check your ship the morning after and couldn’t salvage anything from the burnt wreckage of your ship. That news had made you cry more. You think you must have spent the first week crying in the uncomfortable cot in the ship before you convinced Mando to buy a mattress when docked in Nevarro.

You’d been living with Mando and the kid for 4 months now. It had taken Mando a while to trust your partnership. A lone wolf for the majority of his career he was unsure of how it would work long term. Short term partnerships suited him better but there was something about watching you hunt the bounty that changed his mind. The two of you worked together seamlessly.

You also took a while to fall into the Mandalorians routine, but once in it you never wanted to leave. Mando ran a tighter schedule of bounty hunting than you had. Early mornings and late nights with little rest time took a while to get used to. In the beginning you were asleep as soon as your head hit the thin pillow in the cot, exhaustion wearing you out. Mando however never seemed to feel the fatigue. A few hours here and there were enough to recharge the Mandalorian.

You found yourself becoming more and more intrigued by the armored man with whom you now lived. You’d catch small glimpses of skin, a sliver of wrist here or a peak of his neck there, but never more than that. Mando was stoic and guarded. His armor just added to that. By contrast you were the opposite, talkative and loud. Where Mando covered up, you relished in not having too. Often walking around in the shirt he gave you on the first night and a pair of pants. Mando never made an indication that it bothered him, having you walk around half naked all the time, but you could never tell what he was thinking under that helmet.

After a couple of weeks you noticed that the ship's heating stayed on for longer, and a warmer blanket had been purchased. So you figured that he didn’t mind, and maybe even enjoyed seeing you dress like that. You both slept on the same bed but in shifts, often you’d go first, while Mando would fly you away from whichever planet you were on before coming down to eat with you in the hull.

Mando became more talkative as the days passed. His modulated voice became your favourite sound as he asked questions about your previous life as a solo bounty hunter over bowls of soup. Conversations were still brief but Mando would let you chat to him about anything and everything.

Mando had taught you how to fly the ship after one of your hunts went wrong and Mando had to fly you into hyperspace whilst you held a bunched T-shirt to his rib cage to stop the bleeding. You had argued that you would have figured it out eventually ‘as you did have a ship too once’. Mando had held off originally as it was the one part of his life you hadn’t gotten into. The quiet hours away from you in the cockpit, whilst you slept, allowed him to get lost in his thoughts.

Now the pair of you sat in the hull of the ship, the child asleep in the cot. Mando had been cleaning his blaster when you woke up, and you settled across from him to clean your knives. The silence between you was comforting, just the groans of the ship flying through hyperspace could be heard.

Mando watched you polish your knives, visor fixed intently on your hands. You worked the cloth into the flat part of the blade, buffing out any smears or stains until it shone in the dim light of the hull. Mando sat with his arms resting on his knees, back pressed against the ship's wall. He looked relaxed, or at least the most relaxed you’d ever seen him look.

“Where did you get them?” His voice broke the silence between you.

“My uncle made them.” You placed the knife in your hand back in its leather sheath. You turned the sheathed knife in your hand, carefully checking the leather for any damage.

“What are they made from? I’ve never seen you sharpen them.”

“Beskar.”

Mando moved towards you, reaching across the hull to grab the knife that you hadn't got round to cleaning yet. Your eyes flickered up to watch him. He picked it up carefully, turning it over in his gloved hands. He paused, contemplating, holding it in front of his visor. He tapped it against the vambrace on his left sleeve, a sharp singing note rang out. “So it is.”

You watched him, hand subconsciously tightening around the knife still in your possession.

“Where did you get the beskar from?”

“My Dad.”

“And where did he get it?” Mando’s voice was level, but you knew his body language well enough by now to know he wasn’t feeling what his voice portrayed. His shoulders were stiff, and the grip he had on the knife was tight.

You bit your lip, unsure of whether or not to give up this piece of information to Mando. Despite all this time, this felt too vulnerable to share.

Before you could reply Mando spoke up. “Did he steal it?” His voice was accusatory. You snapped your eyes to his visor.

“He didn’t steal it.” You swallowed. “He died. My uncle made me them out of something he owned. Something that would be useful to me.” You looked away, fiddling with the knife in your hand.

“That doesn’t answer where the beskar came from.” Mando leaned in, the soft light glinting off his helmet. He placed the knife down gently on the floor. “Tell me.” His voice was commanding, but softer than it had been.

“He..um.... was dar’manda.” You spoke softly. Mandalorians who had lost their way, their creed, weren’t favorably looked on by true Mandalorians. “He lost his clan. They shunned him, but he kept his helmet and….when he died my uncle melted the beskar down into these knives for me.”

“Why?”

“Why did he get shunned?” Mando nodded. “He showed his face… to my mother. Before they got married. She saved his life. He didn’t want to live without her, and he couldn’t bring himself to kill her…. So he left.” Mando scoffed.

“Hut’uunla.” Mando’s voice was low, his hands curled into fists. Your mandalorian was good enough to understand what he had called your father. Cowardly.

Anger wells up in your chest. “He was not a coward.” You spit at him. “He couldn’t kill my mother because she was pregnant.” Angry tears burn your eyes, you unsheathe the knife slowly. Anger burned in your chest, white hot and red. You toyed with the knife between your hands, contemplating your odds against Mando.

Mando watches you. He sat as still as a statue. He can feel the anger rolling off you, you had a wild look in your eye. You looked every bit the dangerous bounty hunter who he’d come to know.

He raised his hands, palms open and towards you. “Udesii...calm down...I apologise. That was cruel of me.” You were still angry but you knew better than to try to fight Mando. Even with two beskar knives.

“He wasn’t a coward, Mando. He risked his life over and over to protect us.” Your voice was quiet and thick with sadness. “He risked everything to save my mother.”

“I am sorry….” Mando trailed off as you interrupted him, holding a finger up to stop him from talking.

“No you’re not. You reacted how any Mandalorian would. It is not the way.” Your tone was sharper. Of course Mando would have reacted like that. No Mandalorian abandons his clan. No Mandalorian shows their face.

“Still he was your father.” Mando sat back against the wall, legs stretched in front of him. He crossed his arms across his chest. Silence washes over the ship again.

You start to vigorously clean the other knife, wiping the cloth up and down the blade in fast but rhythmic strokes. Usually this process would help calm you down, help to erase any stress but not this time. You could see a slither of your reflection in the blade, your eyes were glassy with angry tears and your cheeks looked flushed. You chewed on your bottom lip. You blinked back the tears in your eyes, refusing to cry anymore in front of Mando.

“How much Mando’a do you know?” His gruff voice broke the silence again.

“A small amount.” You forced yourself to meet the emotionless gaze of the visor. You wished you could see his face. “My dad only ever used it in small phrases.” Mando nodded.

“How did he die?”

“He was a rebel fighter. From Alderaan.” You took a deep breath. “He got killed in the clone wars.” Mando stayed silent for a moment, helmet slightly tilted to one side.

“And your mother?”

“Dead.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. She was ill. Nothing could help her.” You smiled weakly. “She was a wonderful woman but I’m glad she is no longer suffering.”

“The rest of your family?”

“Dead. They were killed when Alderaan was destroyed. My mother and I had left to find a healer.” You huffed out a short, callous, laugh. “Some tragic backstory huh? What about you Mando?”

“Parents dead. I was saved by Mandalorians. I became a foundling and now I’m here.” His answer was abrupt and emotionless.

“We’re more alike than I thought.” You smiled sadly at Mando. The angry tension between you both faded. Mando’s shoulders visibly relaxed as you placed the other knife back in it's sheath. You waited a bit before asking him another question. “Have you ever taken your helmet off?”

“Never.” His reply was short, not cold, but short enough to signal he didn’t want to discuss further. He got up, armor chinking softly. “Get ready. We’ll be landing in an hour.”

You went to get up, legs buzzing from lack of use, and you staggered forward. Mando steadied you, his gloved hand was warm through the sleeves of your top. You blushed, a different kind of warmth spread through you. “Oh...thanks.” He nodded but didn’t release his grip on your arm.

The ship jolted, dropping out of hyperspace, catching you off guard. You fell into Mando’s chest. You braced your hands against his beskar chest plate. His hands moved to hold the tops of your arms. You looked up at him, craning your neck to meet his visor. Neither of you went to move, choosing to stand still watching each other. One with wide eyes, the other hidden behind a mask. Your heart was beating fast, butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

“I really am sorry about your father, and your mother. I shouldn’t have said those things.” Mando’s voice was soft and quiet. You two were so close you could just make out the baritone of his actual voice. You felt something tug deep inside you. Oh maker.

“It’s okay.” Your voice was a breathy whisper. Your cheeks felt hot under the unwavering stare of the visor. “I… uh…” you trailed off, unsure of where you wanted to take that sentence.

Mando cocked his head to one side. You were sure he was studying your face. Again you wished you could see past the helmet.

Mando moved one of his hands, slowly sliding it up your neck. You held your breath, not wanting to move an inch and break the spell. The warm leather of his glove stroked across your skin sending shivers down your spine. Mando let his hand tangle in the hair at the nape of your neck, softly tugging. You let out a small gasp. Mando lowered his head slowly toward you.

The cool beskar of the helmet is what you registered first. It was icy compared to your flushed skin. You jumped slightly, before relaxing. A Keldabe kiss. You closed your eyes, and allowed yourself to lean into him. You let out a shaky breath. You lifted one of your hands from his chest and rested it gently against the side of his helmet. You opened your eyes and stared into the darkness of the visor. You wanted to see his eyes. You wanted to see him.

The touch was innocent enough. No more than a friendly Mandalorian greeting, but it was so much more than that for you. You never wanted to move. Mando’s thumb was stroking up and down the side of your neck, coaxing the muscles to relax.

Mando moved first. Lifting his head and moving his hand from the back of your neck to cup your cheek. He softly ran his thumb over your cheekbone. Oh Maker…. Whatever fondness you had for the Man who saved your life had just tipped over a metaphorical cliff edge into a full blown crush. And you hadn’t even seen his face.

Mando broke away first. Stepping away from you, dropping his arms to his sides. His helmet looking to the floor. “We need to land.”

“Do you want me to fly?” He shook his head, he was about to speak but you cut him off. “Let me fly. I’ll quickly get ready and then you can sort the kid out.”

Mando’s head tilted to watch you, considering your offer. A low came grumble from the helmet. “Fine. He needs to be fed.” With that he turned and disappeared up the ladder. You let your shoulders drop as he disappeared. You felt over exposed and emotional. With a long sigh you stripped off your clothes and stepped into the fresher. A quick, hot shower helped clear your head. Reluctantly you turned the water off, and walked back into the cool hull of the ship.

You bent down to your bag and pulled out your winter clothes. This next bounty was hiding out on Maldo Kreis. Thankfully Mando had made you buy winter clothes when you’d been on Coruscant for a different bounty. You got dressed into your underwear, chucking the towel in the direction of the ‘fresher.

You were sitting in your underwear in the cot tugging on some thick socks when Mando descended the ladder from the cockpit. He stopped when he saw how little you were wearing.

“Sorry!” Came the modulated voice.

“It's fine...er.. could you turn around please?” Mando turned away from you, and you jumped down out of the cot, turning to grab your thick, fur lined leggings.

“He should be in the tavern in town.”

“Okay, is he alone?” You pulled on an undershirt, tucking it into your leggings.

“No. I don’t think he will be.”

“Great. And he’ll definitely be in the tavern?”

“I hope so. I don’t want to trawl this stupid ice planet.” You laughed. Mando hated all extremes of temperatures.

“Neither.” You bent down to lace up your snow boots. You finished getting ready, strapping the knives to your thighs, and walked over to the ladder. Mando turned and watched you. You felt a small flash of warmth as his visor followed your movements across the hull. You smiled at him.

“Where’s the kid?”

“Asleep. I’ll lock him in the ship.” You nodded and climbed the ladder and opened the door to the cockpit.

The little green gremlin child of Mando’s was inches from pressing a button on the console when you stepped over the threshold into the cockpit.

“Don’t touch that! Come here trouble!” The kid froze in place, turning its big eyes around to you. You gathered him into your arms, just as tears started to form. “Oh no baby, it's okay. I’m not angry.” His little mouth quivered so you cuddled him closer, Mando would probably kill you if you made the kid cry.

Settling the kid back in his chair, you sat in the pilot seat. Maldo Kreis loomed in front of the cockpit window, a formidable icy planet. You tapped in the coordinates to the only big town on the planet, hoping that would be where your bounty is hiding.

As you sat in the chair, your mind was in a whirl. What had Mando meant by that? It was so soft and affectionate. You tucked your legs up on the chair.

The keldabe kiss was a sign of affection between couples. You frowned. You weren’t a couple. You wracked your brain for more information on the Mandalorian greeting but couldn’t come up with anything useful. The way Mando touched you left butterflies in your stomach, and a wetness between your thighs. The gentle caress of his leather clad fingers turned you on more than you were willing to admit.

Flicking a few more switches on the dashboard of the ship, you began the descent into the atmosphere. Frost began to appear on the edges of the windows as you descended. Maldo Kreis’ landscape was mountainous and rocky. Snow covered every inch of the planet and there were barely any trees or vegetation. Flying low to the ground you found a place to conceal the ship. Mando liked to land the ship away from towns if he could. It helped with protecting the kid. It was only a small ridge of rocks but it would hide the ship from the harsh winds that whipped around the planet. You lowered the Crest as gently as you could, the old ship groaning and creaking as the landing gear came out. Once down you powered down the engines but kept the heating system running. The kid would freeze otherwise.

The door to the cockpit opened with a soft hiss, and Mando walked in all decked out in his armor. The kid babbled at him incoherently as Mando scooped him out of his seat. You double checked the ship's security systems, before slipping out of the chair, following the Mandalorian down the ladder.

Mando was settling the kid in the cot when you jumped off the ladder, swaddling him in blankets. You watched him take care of the child, smiling softly at how gentle Mando was with him. “I’ve left the heating on.”

“Thank you.” Mando didn’t turn to look around at you, but his voice was affectionate. You blushed. You could hear the kid babbling away to Mando, and low mumbles of Mando talking back. You felt your heart squeeze watching them both.

Turning to the weapons cupboard, you slipped on your knife belt, and sheathed your knives into the holders. Mando soon appeared by your side, as you contemplated taking a blaster, staring into his extensive collections of weapons.

“Here. Take this one.” He reached in and passed you a small blaster. You took it carefully, double checking the safety, before tucking it into the waistband of your leggings.

You walked back to your bag on the floor, pulling out your warm fur lined coat. Tying your hair up in a ponytail, you shrugged the coat on, the soft fur tickling the back of your neck. “Are you ready?” You asked Mando, as you pulled on some gloves. He nodded.

The kid sat in the cot, covered in warm blankets. You smiled at him, both placing a soft kiss on the top of his head. “Be good, little one!” He smiled up at you, little hands making grabbing motions at you. You gave him your finger to hold, as Mando said goodbye. You chuckled at the image, two fearsome bounty hunters saying cute goodbyes to the big eared green creature who you both adored.

Mando clicked a button on his vambrace, and the cot door slid shut with a click. “Let’s go.” He walked towards the ramp, clicking another button to lower it. Freezing cold air rushed into the hull, so you pulled the hood of your jacket up over your head, fastening a button to keep it in place.

Mando strode off the ramp, with you scurrying behind him. He still didn’t quite realise that you had to walk two steps for every one of his. Stepping off the ship, you were blinded by the bright white light of the snow. You held your hand up to your face to shield your eyes. You could only see white snow for miles. The ramp creaked and groaned behind you as it closed, a lot louder than normal in the dead quiet of the snow. The wind was blowing into your face, the cold making your eyes sting and water.

“Town is ½ a mile that way.” You gestured to the right a bit. “I saw it as I landed.” Mando started to walk in that direction. You walked behind him, using his body to shield you from the wind. The untouched snow crunched beneath your feet. You smiled remembering a memory of snow fights with your dad as a kid.

Bending down quickly you gathered a handful of snow into one gloved hand, compacting it into a ball with the other. You glanced up. Mando was still walking ahead of you, unaware of your plans.

Splat!

The snowball hit the Mandalorian square in the back. You giggled as he turned to face you, the dark gaze of the visor studying you. “Did you… just throw a snowball at me?”

You froze. Oh no. Mando was so serious, you didn’t know if he’d even understand what a snowball fight is. You hang your head, and mumble a yes.

Because you’d hung your head, you didn’t see him lean down and grab a handful of snow, until it hit you square in the chest. The force of his throw, making you stumble.

“Ooof…. hey!” You laughed. You reached down and grabbed another handful, lobbing it back at his head. It hit his shoulder.

“Missed.” Came the low rumble of his voice, and it sounded like he was laughing. “Come on, lets keep going.” He turned and walked on. You jumped after him, jogging slightly to catch up.

“I didn’t know Mandalorians did snowball fights.”

“Good target practice.” You grinned at him, happy that he indulged your little game.

The town soon loomed into view. Mando paused, taking out the bounty puck. A faint red light was flashing, and the ever familiar beeping could be heard. “Hopefully he’s still here.”

“There’s nothing for miles.” You add, trying to remember the landscape around the town. “The east side of the town has a port, and then it's just mountain ridges and flat tundra for miles and miles.”

The town walls are dark and crumbling, no guards are at the outpost, so you both saunter into the main square. There’s not much in town, it's small and half abandoned after being favoured by smugglers. The smell of smoke is heavy in the air, and you could see fires flickering in the windows of some of the houses. The streets were covered in a grey/blown slush from people walking through to the only tavern in town. Mando checked the bounty puck, it was blinking softly. So he’s here somewhere.

Mando paused a little way down the street. “I need you to go in first. Scout the area, and let me know.” He handed you the earpiece comms link. You slipped it on. “Can you hear me?”

His voice sounded in your ear, deep and rich. You felt a flash of warmth pool in your stomach. Oh maker…. You nodded your head, trying to clear your head. You’ve used the comms link a lot, and each time you have the same reaction to his voice. “Good. Go on in, I’ll wait here.”

You slip inside the tavern, the stark contrast of temperature brings a small flush to your cheeks. You tip your hood back, just enough so you can see, but not enough to take it off and expose the comms. The bar of the tavern was softly lit by candles, and a big hearth fire blazed in the centre. Pots of chowder bubbled away as they hung over the fire, a Mythrol cook was standing close by, wearing an apron smeared with food.

You walked over to the bar, assessing the rest of the tavern. Groups of people sat huddled around tables. A pair of Dyplotid’s glanced in your direction as you came in but they went back to their cards. The barkeeper smiled as you walked in.

“Ah...hello. What can I get you?” His voice was gravelly, his skin old and weathered.

“Just a mintea. It’s cold.” He let out a chuckle.

“First time here?”

“Hmm, yes. Didn’t realise it’d be this cold.” You pulled out a bar stool and settled in, resting your arms on the table. The barkeeper placed a mug of mintea down in front of you. You wrap your hands around it, the heat permeating through the gloves.

“What brings you here?”

“I needed to rest. I’ve been flying for a while. I’m on my way back to Coruscant.” The lie slipped easily off your tongue. It was nice to be off the ship. Maldo Kreis was in the outer rim, and the journey to here had been long. Longer than you had anticipated. Especially as Mando’s ship doesn’t do anything above hyperdrive, which although fast is still slow in comparison to your old ship.

He nodded and then turned to chat to one of the other patrons who had come up to the bar. You took another glance around the room. You couldn’t see anyone who resembled the bounty.

The comms link crackled in your ear, and Mando’s soft voice filled your head. “Are you going to sit at the bar all day while I freeze out here?” You can hear the amusement in his voice. You glanced out to your right to the window, you could see him leaning against the wall outside. His pauldrons and helmet were covered in a light dusting of snow. You smirked.

You tap your chest twice, just above your heart. It was a signal you and Mando had come up with to signify that an area was safe without having to use words. Mando pushed himself off the wall and walked into the tavern.

More people looked up when he walked in. Larger than life, and in a full suit of armor, he commanded attention. He glanced over at you before walking to a booth at the back of the room. The bartender’s eyes followed him as he moved.

“A Mandalorian.” He said, not to anyone in particular. Then he glanced at you. “A friend of yours?” You shrugged, not wanting to give anything away. He laughed, a deep throaty laugh.

You smiled at him, relaxing a bit now Mando was inside. Mando would contact you if he needed you. “How long have you been here?” You took a sip of your mintea, the warmth of the hot liquid spreading in your body.

“All my life. Never left.” You raised your eyebrows, you couldn’t imagine a life stuck on one planet. “Haha, not everyone gets to travel the galaxy girl.”

“Some people need to hold down the fort at home.” He nodded at that.

“Exactly. Who will take care of all the lonely, single travelers if I don’t?” His voice was soft, and he looked you up and down. You met his eyes, they were dark and glittering under hooded eyelids.

You took another sip of your drink. When he spoke again, his voice was different. It was harsher than before. “So I’ll ask again, what really brings you out here?”

“I told you. A rest stop on my way back home.”

“Nothing to do with that Mandalorian over there?” He lifted his chin, gesturing to the back of the tavern, to the secluded corner Mando had placed himself in.

You shook your head instead of answering. He raised an eyebrow. “Hmm, I don’t believe you. He hasn’t stopped staring in this direction since he entered.”

You feel a blush creep into your cheeks, just as a knot of anxiety coils in your stomach. Something is wrong. You smile at the barkeeper. “Can’t blame him for staring.”

You place the mug back on the table, and move one of your hands down to your leg. You tapped your knee twice with your thumb. Another little signal to Mando. You then lift your hand and fish into your pockets for some credits. “Thanks for the drink.” You chuck them down and start to slide off the stool.

The barkeeper keeps his eyes on you. You notice the Dyplotids’ raising out of their chairs. Shit. Shit. Shit. You curse internally for letting yourself be fooled. You remain calm, tugging your hood up over your head, pretending to be getting ready to leave. You turn to flash a smile at the barkeeper. He watches you, eyes flickering to you and then the Dyplotid’s behind you.

“They’re following you.” Came the low voice of Mando in your ear again. You make no movement to acknowledge his voice as you walk out onto the street. “There’s an alley to your left. I’ll follow in a minute.”

You spot the alley. It’s darker than the Main Street but not enough to hide in. Dammit. You slip into it regardless, hearing footsteps crunching on the snow slush behind you. You keep walking. Where is Mando? The alley comes to an abrupt end with the outer wall of the town looming above you. You stop and turn.

You were met with the faces of the Dyplotids. Four eyes each stare down at you, dark and angry.

“Who are you?” One hisses.

“A nobody.” You reply, praying that Mando appears soon.

“Some nobody being friends with a Mandalorian.” The other speaks.

“What do you want?” You glare back at them. If you acted quickly you’d probably be able to take them. Your fingers twitch, brushing the hilt of your knives.

Before they could answer, two blaster shots rang out. The Dyplotids fell forward, two giant burning holes in their backs. You glance up to the top of the alley. Mando was standing there, lowering his blaster.

“Let’s go. He’s not here.” His voice came through the comms link. You walked over to him, while he waited for you. His visor fixed on you. He held out the puck. The light was off and it was silent.

“Thank you for saving me.” You looked up into the dark visor.

“You’re welcome.” You could hear the modulated voice, and the deep rumble of his real voice in your ears. You stared at him, transfixed at his voice. He let out a small snort. Arrogant dick was probably smirking under the mask. You shook your head, trying to shake yourself out of your delusions.

“What now?” You sidestepped him and started to walk down the street. Mando fell into step beside you.

“We need intel on where he could be. I am not traipsing the whole planet.” His voice was only coming through the comms link. Practically you knew it was to help maintain a low profile, but subconsciously you hoped he never stopped, you could listen to him all day.

“There is a port with landspeeders for hire?”

“Too expensive.”

“Well it's either that or walk.”

“He won't be far from the town. There’s nothing for miles.”

“That’s what you think. There might be something out there and we won't find it on foot.” Mando was often too stubborn. “I say we go to the port. Leave it to me.”

Mando gazed down at you, you folded your arms across your chest. You could be stubborn too, and you had a plan.

“Fine. But you pay.”

“Fine.” You looked around for a sign to the port.

“It's left.”

“I know.” You huffed.

The walk to the port was short. You didn’t see any other townsfolk, which was odd considering the altercation back at the tavern. Maybe people are scared?

A ferryman stood next to a couple of old landspeeders. You could hear Mando mumbling about a waste of money in your ear. You ignored him.

The ferryman looked up. “What can I do yous for?” He grunted.

“I’d like to hire a landspeeder.”

“Yeah. And where are you going with it?”

“I fail to see how that’s your business?” You questioned back.

“Hurrmph.” Came the grunted reply. “My ‘speeders, my business.”

“You can’t argue with that logic.” Mando’s voice rang in your ear. You wanted to elbow him, but thought better of it. You looked back at the ferryman, he was another Mythrol. His blue skin barely visible through his hood.

“I need to see Salvius.” Might as well go big or go home.

“What if he don’t wanna see you?”

“He’s expecting us.” You swallowed. You felt Mando stiffen beside you.

“Oh is he? What does he want from you?”

“Now that is none of your business.” You quip back dryly. You could feel that coil of anxiety growing in your stomach. What if he’s bluffing and just takes you into the middle of nowhere?

“It's gonna cost ya.” 

“Name your price.” Mando huffed next to you.

“1000 credits.” You balk at the price.

“No. 550 and that’s it.” Panic tinged your voice. Shit.

“750. Or no landspeeder.”

You caught Mando’s hand moving to his blaster holstered on his hip. Please don’t do it. 

“I suggest you take what the lady offers.” Came the soft hiss from the helmet. The Mythrol stared at the Mandalorian.

“Or what?” Mando didn’t give him the courtesy of an answer before he blew a hole in the centre of his chest with the blaster. You jumped with the loudness of the bang.

“FUCK MANDO!” You cried as the ferryman's’ body crumpled to a heap on the floor.

“I didn’t trust him.”

“No shit!” Your heart was pounding. Mando whipped round to glare at you.

“Your plan was stupid.” A small twinge of anger hit your chest.

“At least I had a plan.” You spat back.

Mando stared at you for another second before bending down to grab the landspeeder keys from the Mythrols’ belt. He jumped into the closest one, starting the engine. You clambered in after him. He placed the puck on the dashboard, using it as a sort of navigator.

Mando drives fast. Probably too fast. The cold air whooshed around the vehicle, chilling the exposed parts of your face. You hunker down in the seat. Mando’s helmet dipped towards you, before turning back to face the land ahead. His hands pushed a few buttons on the landspeeders dashboard and hot air was suddenly blowing into your face. The small gesture was sweet, and your heart skipped a beat.

“I forget you feel the cold more than me.” His voice was sympathetic.

“Thanks.” You were going to make a comment about how you don’t have a beskar'gam, or iron skin, to protect you but you left it.

The landspeeder sped over the flat snow, mountains rising up on your left. You were travelling further and further away from the ship. A small pang of guilt tugged your heart at the kid being all alone.

A red light caught your eye. The puck was flashing.. “Stop!” You grabbed Mando’s sleeve.

“What?” He slowed the landspeeder.

“The puck!” You scanned the area. A small glint of light caught your eye. “There up on the ridge.”

Mando turned to look. You knew he was scanning the area through his visor.

“Do you see anything?”

He grunted in acknowledgment. “There’s a group of people.” You strained to see what he was seeing, but your eyes couldn’t make out anything against the snow.

“Do you think they’ve seen us?”

“Definitely.” Mando started the landspeeder again. “They have the higher ground. We can’t get to them until nightfall.” You glanced up at the sky, the clouds were so thick you couldn’t make out the sun.

Mando zoomed over towards an outcrop of rocks and hid the speeder behind it. He kept the engine running. “We’ll have to wait here.”

“We’ll stick out like sore thumbs.” You gestured to your dark snow clothes, and his dark grey beskar.

“That's why we’re waiting. We’ll be more disguised in the snow at night.”

“What about heat sensing?”

“I have a plan.” You snorted. Great. You settled back into the seat, tucking your knees up. Might as well rest for a bit.

When you woke up your face was pressed against Mandos' right pauldron. You blinked in the dark. There was some sort of pressure on your leg, on the inside of your knee. You glance down, Mando’s leather clad hand resting there. It was so casual, the way it was draped over your knee, giving you better access to his arm to sleep on. Mando felt you stir.

“Are you awake?” He squeezed your knee, so softly that you weren’t even sure it happened.

You hummed a response, lifting your head from his shoulder. The landscape was dark around you, barely any light from the moons filtered through the clouds. Mando lifted his hand, making it easier for you to sit up. “They’re still up on the ridge.” You glanced up, you could make out a soft glow of orange. “They lit a fire.” Mando confirmed your thoughts.

“How many?”

“A few.”

You exhaled softly. “Think it's Salvius?”

Mando shrugged. “Potentially.”

“What’s the plan?”

The plan, as it turned out, was for you to roll in snow to reduce your heat flare. Mando apparently didn’t because ‘his armor doesn’t get warm, or show up on infrared.’ You didn’t quite believe him but felt like starting an argument about it was worthless. The second phase of the plan, after Mando shoved snow down the back of your top a little too zealously, was to sneak up to the ridge and scout out the people.

You were shivering as Mando led the way towards the ridge through the snow. You stuck close to his back, head down, following his fresh footprints in the snow.

As you walked you let your mind wander. Something has changed between the pair of you. Sure Mando has touched you before, he’s helped with injuries or fastening up jackets but the past few touches felt different. They felt softer, kinder, more personal than the other times he’s touched you. And the keldabe kiss? What does that mean?

You were so lost in thought you didn’t see Mando stop, and you collided into his back.

“Watch where you're going.” He mumbled.

You looked around. The landscape was dark and grey, the sky was also dark and grey, and the man you were following was dressed in dark grey colours. You could just about see your feet. Mando carried on walking. The terrain beneath your feet got steeper, and more icy. You must be nearing the top of the ridge. Mando held his arm out, you stopped. His visor was fixated on the campfire.

“Somethings wrong.” He murmured.

“What?”

“There’s more than I thought.”

You glanced across at the campfire. The hike up the ridge had gotten you pretty much level with the campfire, although you were about 200m to the right of it. You couldn’t make out individual shapes, just a dull orange glow.

“The fire is low.” Mando nodded next to you.

“They have lots of boxes. A land cruiser as well.” He glanced around, and then at the puck strapped to his chest. The red light was blinking. “This will be them.”

You looked around you, trying to make out surroundings. You and Mando were on a rocky ridge that jutted out from the main ridge line. A steep cliff fell away in front of you, the bottom of it cloaked in darkness. The campfire sat on another ledge. To get there you’d have to climb.

“Is it worth it?” You were only asking due to the landscape. Neither of you had an advantage here. If anything it was a foolish mission.

“Yes.” The response was abrupt.

A noise to your left, caused your heart to race. You froze as Mando whipped his head around. A voice sounded in your ear. “They’re behind us.” No shit.

“Have they seen us?” Your voice was barely a whisper.

Mando didn’t get a chance to respond before a blaster shot rang out, narrowly missing your head. Mando pulled you close to him. “Stay close.”

You pulled the blaster out of your waistband, quickly clicking the safety off. You couldn’t see anything. The clouds were thinning slightly but they were still covering the moon.

Another blaster shot rang out, you hid behind Mando. You felt one of his hands wrap around and rest on your hip, keeping you close. He lifted his blaster up and fired off into the dark.

You heard a few cries as he shot a few people. Mando staggered backwards as a shot hit his breastplate. He let out a low groan at the force. Blaster shots were ringing out all around you. You fired aimlessly into the dark, praying that you hit someone.

You glanced up at the sky again, a gap was appearing in the clouds, faint moonlight filtering through. You looked around Mando, 12 people stood blasters firing at the pair of you. You aimed and got two of them, they fell down with a thump. A blaster shot whistled past your head, and you ducked back behind Mando.

The clouds parted and the moonlight shone down onto the ground. You aimed your blaster again, hitting 3 more people in the chest.

You fired your blaster again, but before you could pull the trigger, searing pain ignited on your leg. You looked down. A shot had just skimmed your thigh leaving a burning hole in your leggings and melting the leather of your knife holder. Your flesh was burnt and blistered. The pain took your breath away, and you cried out. Gritting your teeth you fired back in the direction of the shot, before falling to the ground groaning. The moon disappeared again, plunging you back into darkness.

Mando ran over to you, shielding you with his body again as you quickly packed snow onto the wound, trying to numb the pain. The blaster shots were becoming less and less frequent, until they stopped altogether.

Mando spun round and dropped to his knees. “Are you okay?”

“My leg….” you groaned. You didn’t want to be a baby but, stars, it hurt. Mando’s hands fluttered carefully over the wound, unfastening your knife holder and peeling your burnt leggings away. You hissed in pain.

“Sorry. I have to get a better look.” You clenched your hands into a fist, digging your nails into the palm of your hand. Mando placed a hand on your knee, to stop you twitching whilst he got a better look. “It doesn’t look deep. We need to…”

Before Mando could finish his sentence another shot rang out, hitting him square in the back. He fell forward onto you with the force of the blow, crushing your leg under his armor. You cried out in pain. Mando pushed himself off, whipping around, blaster drawn and firing behind him.

Moonlight lit the ridge up, illuminating the bodies of the attackers. Blaster shots rang out, the noise echoing off the rocks. You turned over onto all fours, pain stabbing through you. Breathing deeply you stood up on shaky legs, grabbing your knife from the floor. This time the assailants pressed closer, moving towards you and Mando.

Once up you pulled out your other knife. Waves of pain throbbed through your leg. But before you could adjust your balance, a blaster came crashing down into the side of your shoulder, knocking you back to the floor. You rolled with the movement, before springing up as fast as you could. You hit out with one of your knives at your attack, managing to cut his shoulder. He hissed, and pulled out a dagger, lunging at you. You sidestepped his movement, and he fell slightly, off balanced. You took the opportunity to jump on top of him, knife sinking into the side of his neck. Easy. He tried to grab you as you both fell back into the snow, but his strength quickly faded. Ripping the knife out you turned, just as another man lurched towards you.

You rolled out of his way, narrowly avoiding his weapon. Jumping up again you stand ready to attack. He turns and jabs out at you with a knife. You dodge it, before diving in to stab at his exposed chest. Your knife glances off his rib cage, leaving a small cut through his clothes. A hand grabs your wrist as you pull back, pulling you to him. He twists one of your arms behind your back, the muscles in your shoulder screaming at the angle. You kick upwards with your boot, colliding your heel with his balls. He bends over, loosening his grip just enough for you to wriggle out. He tries to pull you back but you stab him in the arm, just enough for him to release his grip entirely. His eyes shine with anger as he glares at you, before running towards you, knife out. You duck to the side and swipe his legs out from under him. He falls into a heap, and you leap on top of him, yanking his head up. You slit his throat. You feel him shudder beneath you as he bleeds out. You stand up, leg shaking with pain.

Your victory is short lived. Turning around you’re met with three faces. They stalk towards you, and you scurry backwards. One goes in for a jab and you block and catch his chest with the edge of your knife, just as another dives at you. You step backwards.

You hadn’t realised how far you’d gotten to the edge of the cliff. As you step backwards you feel ice and rock crumbling away from beneath your feet. You glance back at the men inching towards you, and then towards Mando who was fighting off 4 men. You don’t see until it's too late. One man steps forward and shoves you. With nothing to catch your fall you slip. You cry out. You can hear Mando screaming your name.

You’re weightless as you fall through the air. You hit the ground with force, for a split second all you can feel is pain, and then everything is silent and dark.

[whirlybirbs]

BEGIN AGAIN ---- i.

summary: after the events of the rise of skywalker, ben solo and rey of jakku make work on gathering and training the next generation of jedi on the planet of ajan kloss. you are a force-user from tattooine. there are two things you’re sure of: there’s much work to do, and you do not like jedi master ben solo. pairing: jedi master!ben solo x jedi!reader word count: 1.6k a/n: this is an au and does contain some spoilers for tros. anyways, i’ve been chipping away at this for a few days now -- merry christmas if you celebrate! if not, happy holidays! here’s my little gift to you.

If someone had asked you where you saw yourself in a year, you wouldn’t have answered, “on Ajan Kloss, of course, running the jungle training course blindfolded, being nipped in the heels by blaster fire from a rusted out JTR-47 droid”.

Certainly, you wouldn’t have explained that you, and many others, were a part of the first class of Jedi to be trained by the legendary Jedi Master Rey of Jakku and Ben Solo-Organa, ex-Sith lord and one of the last Skywalker’s.

But, here you are.

After all, everything changed on Exegol.

Everything.

And when Ben Solo and Rey limped from the carnage of the great hall, force dyad split wide open for the world to see like a raw wound, the war around them began its end in soul quaking violence. The two, bound by the running river of the force, witnessed the end of the Empire -- old and new -- from the cockpit of his Uncle’s old X-Wing.

It’s done.

In the silence of space, they find comfort.

Age old wounds finally begin to heal under the stars.

The war is won.

On Ajan Kloss, Ben Solo falls to his mother’s knees and weeps. Leia Organa cannot remember the last time she held her son -- and for a moment, the whole of the Resistance hangs on the reunion of the last Skywalkers, and the swing of emotions that rush between mother and son through a rekindled home in the lightside of the force.

Leia holds him and Ben smiles for the first time in years.

Everything is different; with the war won, with Palpatine gone...

There’s much work to be done.

Rey is as much his opposite as she is his right hand -- their dyad, though often annoying and terribly troublesome, allows him to have a true friend for the first time in... forever. She is, despite her polarity in approach and attitude, an important part of his life.

And without her, he’s not really sure if this whole rebuilding-the-Jedi-Order thing could happen.

It’s with R2′s help that they locate an age-old holocron buried deep in a temple on Yavin’s third moon -- the names of children who were once designated as ‘gifted’ by the Jedi Order lay in the record. It’s something. The archival piece is nearly rusted shut with age but opens with a delicate tinker when it passes into Ben’s hands.

It’s beautiful.

Pale blue light flickers awake the information inside, presenting a list of names -- a list of lives -- protected deep within the holocron’s humming databank.

When Rey, Ben, Fin and Poe return to Ajan Kloss, hopeful and excited about the prospect of finding others -- it’s with a mournful tone that Leia explains the systemic hunt the Empire conducted to snuff these children out.

“Many of them,” she says softly, “are gone.”

So, perhaps it’s pure chance they find you -- maybe it’s a cosmic happenstance granted by perfect timing and a straight shot in the dark.

Kau'i Koi -- Human -- 10 years old -- Location: Mos Espa, Tattooine.

Your chain code is old -- but places you in a small, old-Empire controlled mining town just outside the Western Dunes.

Ben is skeptical. He blames his dad -- that Solo trait runs through his blood more than anything, along with a bad habit of getting himself into things he can rarely get himself out of. It’s the temper. And off-putting sense of humor.

Whatever.

Ben has to duck when they enter the cantina. Rey is quick to bound ahead of him, leaving the Solo to tug at his poncho and pry the goggles from his face. The sand storm outside has finally started to die down, leaving Chewie looking rather windswept as he steps inside beside him; the Wookie gargles out a bitter complaint.

“No kidding,” Ben supplies, “Let’s hope we find who we’re looking for.”

God, he hates sand.

Shaking his boot, Ben trails Rey to the bar. She’s already chattering excitedly with the barman, eyes alight in that curious way -- the sand doesn’t bother her. Not in the slightest. In fact, she seems to relish in the Jakku-like atmosphere of the desert planet.

“We’re looking for a Kau’i Koi?” she asks, leaning in on her elbows, “Do you know where we can find them?”

“Koi’s been dead a long time,” is the gruff retort she gets. Immediately, the Jedi’s posture sags and Ben sighs, “But her daughter’s around --”

“Daughter?”

“Yeah,” one of his four hands tosses the bar rag over his shoulder, “She runs her Ma’s medicinal shop now. Kid’s got a good hand at elixirs...”

Rey blinks. Ben, narrowing his eyes, tosses five credits on the bar. “And?”

The bar-tender spares a quick look around, leans in and takes the bribe before saying: “Rumor has it, she’s got some Force mumbo-jumbo goin’ on. Buddy a’ mine jacked up his shoulder in a pod-racing accident -- Koi’s kid just...”

He snaps.

“Good as new.”

And that’s how they found you -- wrist deep in an old text about the distilling of certain Felcuian herbs that allows for maximized healing potency. The book, though, is quickly forgotten in exchange for a weary sense of confusion that follows the two people and the Wookie into your cozy, small shop.

“Can I help you?”

You stand, dark root-died robes tied close to your waist. Your tanned, Dewback hide boots mute your movements as you weave through the mud hut.

The first thing Ben Solo realizes is that you’re beautiful. Truly.

(You must be about his age, if not a year or two his younger. There’s something about the quiet calm in your voice -- you hold an air of posture and regality and kindness that falls short on him. You move, too, like a whisper in the wind. You’re quick, a bit like Rey, and far his opposite as he ducks below trinkets daring to clock in him in the forehead.)

The second thing Ben Solo realizes is that you’re dangerous.

Your eyes fall on the lightsabers holstered on either of the hips the moment Rey asks if you’re Kau’i’s daughter. You remember, in that moment, the warnings your mother had nursed you on.

There are people in this world that want you dead for the gift you’ve been given, sweet one. Protect yourself and that gift.

In one swoop, you’ve got a knife to the neck of Ben Solo and a hand raised, stopping the woman with the three buns in her tracks. The Wookie, hurriedly, raises his furry fists in surrender.

The women grits her teeth, muscles locked in a tumultuous state thanks to the force seizing them entirely. Ben is quick to note the control you have over your powers. The knife digs in a bit too much and he winces.

“Who are you?” you ask quickly, calm lost for a terrified look.

Ben raises his hands. “Jedi.”

The first thing you realize about Ben Solo is that he’s handsome. In a rugged, roguish, distrusting sort of way.

You decide, quickly, you don’t like him.

“There are no Jedi,” you spit, grip tightening on the woman as she writhes -- your attention is on the man, with dark eyes and long legs and a handsome face, “The Empire came and killed them. What they left, the First Order finished.”

Rey winces.

“Is that... Is that what happened to your mother?”

We’re not here to hurt you.

Like a rush of cold water, you feel the pass of something along your mind’s consciousness. It’s enough of a distraction to break your hold on the woman who asked -- and it leaves you treading in a sea of panic. It’s an intrusion; a rude prodding of your memories and thoughts that comes like a sideswipe of a pod-racer.

Rey falls to the floor and Ben pushes the blade from his throat.

You step back and raise the knife. Your hands tremble.

“... How do you know about my mother?” you whisper.

"Ben,” she says, “The holocron.”

“... A holocron?”

The tall man digs it from his bag -- the moment it falls into your fingers, the delicate blue crystals interlock backwards, gilded edges rusted from years of hiding away in from age-old temple revealing a data-sequence. A list of names. And your mother’s lay there, highlighted alongside her chain code.

“Only a force user can open it,” says the man -- the one you understand to be Ben -- rather quietly.

You blink. Immediately, the bridge between yourself and the force closes and the holocron snaps shut.

You shove it back his way.

“What do you want?”

That’s when Rey smiles.

And that’s how you find yourself here, six months later, running head on into a thousand year old S’pio tree. The impact itself renders the younglings amused -- the gaggle of them lingering by the upper platform dissolve into laughter as you grip your ribs and groan, rolling into the brush as you swat at the JTR-47 droid nagging at your head incessantly.

“Koi!” it’s a fast bark of your mother’s surname that gathers the attention of everyone on the training course. It comes from Master Ben Solo, swathed in dark robes and perched on the top platform. “Begin again!”

Gritting your teeth and baring the annoyance, you tug the blindfold off your face and begin the hike back to the start of the course.

There’s much work to be done.

And you still don’t like Ben Solo.

[rosepetals-flyingbirds]

Pain.

With: Finan x Reader.

Words: 1.982 

Warnings: Violence, pain, abortion.

Finan has known pain. 

He has lost his mother when he was five years old to the plague, watched his dad sell him to a slaver buyer. Have been pulling boat rowings ever since he was seven. Watched his best friend, Joshua, been taking away from him when he was bold enough to speak up against the whipping Finan received for crying.

He felt pain in the calluses on his hands, in his back after resting in the hardwood floor, in his lungs when it was so cold that he felt he was drowning. Felt pain in his stomach, the pain of being famished.

Pain every time he was taken out of a boat, watched by others, and dragged back in to suffer and cry every night regretting his mere existence.

The pain he saw when a young priest was beaten to death inside a cage the slave-seller had, the excruciating yell the young holly man shout when a knife pierced his chest. Finan prayed for the man, he was three years younger but seemed wiser. Brave to say his faith and not lower his head to abusive men that believe beings could be sold.

The crucifix that laid in his chest, held around his neck by a simplistic rope used to be the young priest's. Finan didn't believe in God before, but when he argued with the holly man discussing where God was while he suffered in monsters' hands, the reverend simply responded: "He sent me to you, to show you his plan, and to tell you to not give up hope. Because one day you'll be freed of it all, and will live a great adventurous life." So even when the man went to God's side, Finan held the cross and used it under the traps that covered his body. The traps who did so little to warm his body when cold, but did so much to agonize him when it was a blazing hot day.

But after the nighamares, he saw hope, hope when Uhtred ran away with him, hope when Norsemen appeared in horses killing the slave-traders. He felt the vengeance when a sword entered the disgusting coward that hurt him and so many innocent before. "Pull." He said, years and years of hearing the demand graved on his thoughts.

                …

While he laid in the made-up camp watching the way Ragnar and abess spoke to his friend-and-now-brother Uhtred, he thought he has finally met happiness. Even while he would rest his eyes afraid of opening them again and find himself submerged by slave bodies. 

Each night he held the cross and prayed, thanked for the freedom, and begged to not be thrown apart again.

Time passed, he followed Uhtred and found his family in Uhtred, Sihtric, Osferth. The brothers he loved and did all in his power to protect.

He watched as king Alfred was naive enough to despise Uthred, watched Uhtred’s pain when Gisela was taken away from him.

He felt it when he was on the roads, forsaken from the safety he finally found back in Cookham.

But of all the emotions he felt, he never experienced the true happiness he did when he looked at you. He was in love, so much he searched for a priest he could trust to marry you two to bond your bodies and souls.

He has hit climax before, had a few women, but when he laid with you was heaven on Earth, how your soft walls held his length inside you while you looked deep in his eyes and moaned his name. He glowed love.

                …

The day you entered the small hall with a simple white dress and spoke to him the promises he knew you would succeed, he cried. Finan, the Irish warrior, the best friend of the great Uhtred Ragnarsson, the same Finan that was called 'The Agile' by the Danes since he was a skilled warrior... He cried happy tears while he gazed at the love of his life promising him your unconditional love.

He cried when you lost your first baby, you were terrified when the healer told you about the infant... but even as scared as you were, you accepted the archangel that would have yours and Finan's love. But when blood dripped from your legs as agonizing pain touch your muscles... you cried for your child, and how helpless Finan felt was unbearable.

Tears streamed down his face too when you shut down the world, when you said that it was your fault, that you didn't take care of his son. He knew pain, but fuck, how it hurt when he listened to your sobs. He would sell his soul just to see you happy.

But he hugged happiness again when you hugged him at night, when you smiled at his silly jokes and teased him of his new hairstyle. Happiness when your belly grew, further than it did before. 

Happiness as he built his chambers inside Bebbanburg, as he built a small wooden cradle for Archie or Darcy. He didn't have a preference for a son or a daughter, as long as they have your heart he knew they would be perfect.

But while he smiled and had his arm around your neck in a feast Uhtred threw in his manor, he felt something at the tip of his stomach, something aching and telling him to be aware. Uhtred's uncle and a cousin have died, but foreigns claiming they had business with Uhtred's late uncle were in the palace. They landed requiring gold, demanding recomposition form from the years and years of aid they offered to Bebbanburg. But that was his problem, Uhtred suffered enough to get the land back already.

But as happy he was, Uhtred invited them in for a stay, even made a banquet to diplomatically discuss with them how of a different lord he is comparing to his ambitious deceased uncle.

Finan kept his sword near. His eyes wandered to Sihtric while they silently agreed to attack if anything occurred.

The moment the foreigners said they were close to Bloodhair and not affiliated to the estate at all, Uhtred knew they were up for nod good. "I own nothing." He stated.

But even after all has happened and Danes were a far issue in their mind, Bloodhair kept his rage for Uhtred, Skade promised him the head of Alfred, but the dane slayer stole his seer. 

"Is better to leave, before we have problems." Finan warned them, but the tattooed man only smiled. 

The food that lay on your stomach got back to your throat and you coughed in your plate, blood droplets painted it red and your muscles seemed to go numb. 

Osferth mumbled a low 'lord' and Uhtred got on his feet looking at how bloodshot the baby monk's eyes were. "What is this?"

Finan held your face in his hands and looked around the table as if he could find something to cure you. Anything.

"Bloodhair is marching, Edward's kingdom is vulnerable, he is not his father. And you will pay for taking what Ragnar promised us."

Sihtric jumped on his feet and pulled his sword touching it at the man's neck. He didn't kill the man afraid to do something that would lack info for his lord, but even the Kjartansson felt panic while you shrieked and pleaded for relief.

"Finan, Finan, everything is burning, the baby, our baby. Finan." You whimpered.

Finan has known pain, has felt it over and over. But nothing, not even hungry, or whipping, losing his friend, being searched by all Saxons and Danes... nothing hurt him in the way it did when you suffered, when you looked at the panic in his eyes, when you glanced at Osferth laying dead in the floor while blood gushed from his mouth.

"No, no, no no no-no-no. Lord, no. Save her, save her." He touched your belly and kissed your face hoping the angels would see how much you meant to him. 

Uhtred left Osferth's purple face and ran to the man who spoke of Bloodhair. "What is this? WHAT IS THIS?" He pulled his sword and impelled it in the man's leg. Sihtric threw an axe at the one near the door and pointed his sword to the other foreign.

Finan's sobs and gasps hunted Uhtred's heart, he watched his best friend losing the most important person of his life, the two most important ones.

"Treat from the Mediterranean, Bloodhair would not kill you by a drink, he will have your head and take it back home. He told us to kill two important people to you. Since your kids are out, these two were easier." Tears streamed down Uhtred's face and before he could get his sword inside the man's organs Finan called to stop. 

"He is mine to kill." The men near the entrance grabbed the bleeding man and took him to the grottoes. Sihtric kills the other man and Uhtred cried while his gaze went to Osferth and to you.

"Finan, i am sorry." He knew Finan was a great partner, but losing you worried Uhtred's mind, a whole lot.

The Irish man kept his eyes downcast, afraid of peering behind his shoulders and discovering that the pain he was feeling denoted real.

He seemed frozen but the sob that hit him was louder than before when Sihtric tugged Osferth's body up. Finan rushed to you and pulled your chair back, placing your head back slowly so he could see you. But it wasn't you any longer, the venom made the veins in your body erupt, your eyes were open, and even if only torturous breaths went away it looked like your eyes lost color days ago. His hand touched your belly, but for his utter pain it wasn't as firm as before, it seemed moveable, the poison hurt his family, it hurt him.

It killed you and little Darcy, little Archie.

It killed him!

Sihtric cried while approached you slowly, the skilled viking loved you like a sister, have smiled brightly when you asked him to be the godfather of your child. Touching Finan's shoulder he was embraced tightly by his friend's hug, sobs moving his body and Sihtric's tears got heavier while his gaze kept on your face.

It shouldn't be like that.

Minutes passed and Finan kept holding your cold hand, he would bury you, in the field near there where wildflowers kissed the place. Uhtred approached his friend and spoke about the prisoner. "They sealed his leg's cut, he is yours to kill."

Finan didn't thank his lord for the help, he wouldn't say "thank you" since it was hardly that.

And after he took each finger off of the man, after he cut each member off him and watched the monster die... he didn't have the feeling he sought, the one of revenge. The one where would calm his mind. Easy his pain.

The burial was calm, Beocca spoke a few words but all of them knew Finan desired to be left alone. 

So after all, he didn't know pain, he knew now. For nothing has hurt him as more than that.

Sihtric lost count of how many times he had to go at the field searching for Finan, only to find the man embracing a dress of yours and sleeping above your grave. No one could stop Finan to visit you, so after trials, Sihtric decided to support him no matter what, so he took blankets and a pillow for his friend, your pillow, every night he went to the field so Finan wouldn't be cold.

No one saw the charismatic man smile for years, not even when ale poured off his pores. And to leave and sail to fight Bloodhair was only accomplished because he needed to bleed the man that ordered to take you away from him.

So after all he witnessed, all he felt, all he was tortured by. He hasn't known pain, for pain its to live without you.

            …

U1? 

[volvolts]

trying again. im gonna talk about my ocs. its pretty long and kinda incoherent idk

first start with robin

idk how to make the picture smaller so im sorry

- her name is robin wright and she’s 17

BACKSTORY

- her mom is a cyberneticist and her dad is a neurosurgeon. they do research on cyborg’s disease and have a company that makes prosthetics. they’re really rich because if it

- robin also had a twin brother named ronan (she’s the younger twin btw). he died when they were 15 because he had a rare case of cyborg’s disease in the brain. his death was so traumatizing for her that she doesn’t remember the months surrounding his death. she doesn’t even remember the funeral

- after ronan’s death, robin’s parents put her into isolation for two years. they pulled her out of her classes and activities and she barely got human interactions during this time

- eventually she had enough and begged to be allowed out which they do--as long as she has a bodyguard with her at all times. the problem? robin had a hard time getting along with most of them. in fact, ryuji is kind of a last resort. if she doesn’t get on well with him, she’ll most likely be isolated until further notice

random facts

- she’s really smart, a natural genius you could say. she was on her third year in college before she was pulled from it (she’s studying to be a neurosurgeon like her father). she’s one of those organized highlighter/color coded note takers too

- robin is a very compassionate person and is compelled to help others as much as she can. 

- stubborn and determined, she’ll pursue nearly everything and won’t back down until she has answers. sometimes she doesn’t know when to stop and accidentally oversteps her boundaries. it’s not because she’s needlessly nosy but because she wants to know the whole story before she can help them

- she has a overactive imagination and would end up thinking up outlandish ideas to fill in the blanks of things she doesn’t know

- robin is one of those people who’s polite and reserved if she doesn’t know you but will talk your ear off when she’s comfortable with you

- she closer with her father, which is why she’s studying the same subject that he works in

- both of her parents are incredibly successful and she’s expected to do something similar so she has a lot on her shoulders

- she hasn’t worked a day in her life but she has unusually strong endurance and stamina

- she has a dog! he’s a golden retriever and his name is beck. he’s an old dog and she loves him very much 

next is ryuji

- his name is ryuji lor and he’s 22

- he also goes by “ryder” (technically he’s supposed to go by that throughout most of my half-baked story because he never told anyone is real name but that’s beside the point)

- he’s a quarter japanese and three quarters se asian (not really sure what kind yet but im thinking somewhere within the vietnam/laos area)

BACKSTORY 

- a bit of TW: FAMILY ABUSE in this passage so skip if it bothers you:  his mom got pregnant with him while she was in college and because her boyfriend bailed on her and stress of the pregnancy and burnout she dropped out and went back to her family. she was seen as “the good one” of the family and was expected to get a good job to get her family out of poverty however when she came back they were incredibly bitter that she “failed” and would verbally and emotionally put her down. They also blamed ryuji because if he wasn’t born then she wouldn’t have dropped out and he was often ostracized because of it. 

- fortunately he and his mom left when he turned 5. they lived in a small apartment and had to get lots of help from neighbors and friends to make ends meet (mostly to babysit ryuji while his mom worked). ryuji vowed to get smart and get a good job to give his mother the life she deserves (and partly because he feels a part of her really does hate him and he wants to make it up to her somehow because if he doesn’t, was he just a parasite like what his aunts and uncles said?)

- when he turned 10, his mom got married and how he has two moms. they’re hard on him but it’s from a place of love so he tries his best to be a good son by studying and staying out of trouble

- at 17, ryuji has a bit of hope ahead of him. he has a part time job, good grades, and maybe a scholarship if he could qualify. suddenly he’s diagnosed with cyborg’s disease in his eyes and arm. they can’t afford either of his surgeries, let alone one. and that’s not going into the prosthetics and rehab afterwards. at night when they think he’s asleep, ryuji hears his moms arguing about how they’ll be able to afford any of it and what they’ll have to do to pay for it. 

- he can’t take it anymore. he runs away

- he ends up in a city he doesn’t recognize and is just allowing himself to die but he gets saved by irving, a back alley repair doctor. he gets prosthetics thanks to her but is now in a massive debt so he works as her assistant and also finds other jobs on the side to repay it

- his backstory is getting really long so things happen in ryuji’s attempt to make money and he ends up also working with ace, who leads an organized crime group, as a handler whose job is to fight/intimidate/kill whoever. 

- a sudden coincidence also ends up working as robin’s bodyguard which starts everything. honestly he’s didn’t want to do this job at first but robin’s parents are willing to pay a good amount of money and it allows him to have time away from his jobs with ace

random facts

- he’s left hand but learned to be ambidextrous, however he’ll usually default to his left hand

- he wore glasses when he was younger (near sighted; it was super bad but he didn’t like it)

- he’s afraid of dogs. it’s not a full on phobia but they make him uneasy because of a childhood thing. (he’s more of a cat person and maybe pets a few stray cats that come across his house every once in a while)

- he doesn’t like people staring at him. he feels self-conscious because of the scar on his face and the shadowed bags under his eyes and people staring at him don’t help

- ryuji is really good with prosthetics repair and can go into in-depth discussions about the mechanics of it all; he actually really enjoys working on it and actually helped design his own arm

- he’s really smart but he had to work really hard to get there and because he never finished his education, he doesn’t really think he is either

- ryuji tries to give off a “i don’t care about anyone” bravado to try and distance himself from everything. but he really cares. like a lot. the few people he has in his life right now, he’s ride or die for them

- ryuji works himself to death to ignore his problems. he’s afraid if he stops moving, he’ll buckle under the pressure and stop forever

- he has a knife hidden in his prosthetic forearm which he will use if he feels threatened. (it’s probably a stiletto knife or something idk yet)

- ryuji is an early riser; waking up at 9 am feels like sleeping in to him. he’s not even that much of a morning person, its mostly out of habit

then there’s castor

- his name is castor oda and he’s 24

- he’s japanese

BACKSTORY

- he lived in a really strict and controlling family who owned a business where he had his entire life planned out for him up to who he was going to marry. he’s always been angry about it because he has older siblings who will take over the company and it’s clear that more of a control and image thing than anything else

- when he went to college, it was his first time actually be away from his family and became friends with a guy named ben. 

- ben helped castor when his family kicked him out at 19 and gave him a place to stay until he could get back on his feet

- castor loved ben like a brother and is forever grateful for him

- ben mysteriously disappeared when they were 21 and everyone is pretty sure he’s dead but no one knows why

- castor wants to find closure on what happened because he’s definitely sure there’s something shady going on and he’s going to find out what.

- he’s an information broker, occasionally crossing paths with ace to relay and gather info but for the most part, castor has been working alone

- when he’s not doing that though, he works as a barista at a coffee shop

random facts

- he has cyborg’s disease in his right arm and when he lived with his family, he was deeply self-conscious about it

- he hasn’t spoken to his parents since they kicked him out but he still talks to his siblings sometimes; he’s the youngest child with two older sisters

- he always had an inkling that ben had romantic feelings for him, which was unrequited, and castor always felt a little guilty that he never reciprocated or that they never got to talk about it

- castor always wears his red scarf no matter the occasion or weather; he has more scarves but he just likes the red one the best

- people think he’s like calm and collected but in reality he’s an impulsive, emotional driven idiot just like the rest of us

- however he is the master of the polite business smile because of his strict upbringing

- he’s a rather disorganized person

next is irving

- her name is ellie irving and she’s 35

- she’s half black, half white

BACKSTORY 

- i don’t have that much solidified for her backstory yet so it might change fyi

- irving had been doing cybernetic research back in college but someone plagiarized her work and submitted their paper before she came forward

- because the paper was published before she published hers, SHE was initially hit with backlash of plagiarism

- eventually they try to sort it out but in the end, while she proved she didn’t plagiarize the other, she couldn’t prove that she came up with the research first and they just terminated the both her and the plagiarist

- she was barred from going into higher cybernetics research and honestly she’s still a bit bitter about it

- she went into prosthetics repair instead but still struggled to find work because of her alleged reputation, which many still believed she stole another’s work

- eventually she manages to open up a shop that specializes in prosthetic repairs and replacements

random facts

- she’s really harsh and aloof, however she cares in her own way

- honestly irving doesn’t believe herself to be a good person due to how she feels she let herself to bitterly sulk in her anger for so long

- she smokes a bit but she’s trying to cut back lately

- irving won’t pry if you come to her with a broken arm and you need help; she’ll fix you up and leave it at that and allow you to come to her yourself

- she’s incredibly observant and can tell if your lying with just a glance

- she doesn’t know that ryuji works for ace; she’s concerned when he seems more tired than usual but she doesn’t know how to pry

last one cuz im tired

his name is ace (i don’t have a last name for him) and he’s 32

- he owns an organized crime ring; im thinking he’s connected to something bigger and possibly something with the black market

- not much is known about him but he’s a charismatic man and has the intimidation factor 

- he flips his demeanor a lot. one minute he’s jovial and kind then the next he’ll give you thinly veil threats. he mostly does it to keep people on their toes so it’s a power thing

- begrudgingly he’s the closest thing to a father figure ryuji is gonna get

- also the jacket ryuji always wears? it’s a gift from ace

and that’s all i got so far! i have a lot more ocs but i don’t have have a lot of backstory for them yet. let me know what you think of these guys and feel free to ask questions!

[bitch-of-the-wilds]

Dragon Age 2: Abridged

You start the game and as you're running 🏃‍♂️💨 away from the Zombi- I mean Darkspawn, the very first thing that happens is one of your 2 younger siblings fucking dies. ⚰️💀🥀(RIP Carver)

Then there's a dragon 🐉 which is awesome! But also: fuck, there's a dragon and you're level 1. But wait, now the dragon's an old lady who you swear sounds familiar. 🧙‍♀️ But she won't teach you how to become a dragon, so who cares.

Anyway, your mother cradles your sibling's cooling corpse to her chest and blames you for their death because you're the oldest and (somehow⁉️) you were supposed to protect them from the massive 5-ton ogre and stop it from crushing their rib cage like a gerbil in the hands of a vindictive toddler. 🐹

It's mentioned in passing that "At least they're with father now," and oh, yeah, guess your dad is dead too.

Surprise! Welcome to Dragon Age: 2 -The game where the plot is made up and your feelings don't matter. 🎆🎇

After you finally escape the fuckin 🍭🔥Candy Land from Hell🔥🍭: you're sold into servitude (see also: slavery) to pay your way into the city because your drunkard of an uncle has gambled away every penny of wealth your family ever had, including the house (and the dog too, but don't worry, there's DLC for that 🐕)

Then, after a year of smuggling and/or shady mercenary work for the dickheads that hold your leash, you're still broker than a ramen-filled Millenial with an undergrad degree in psychology, so you have to go into the Deep Roads to find your fortune.

Do you take your only remaining sibling with you into one of the most dangerous places in Thedas? Or do you leave them in Kirkwall, an almost equally as dangerous place, without even little ole' you there to protect them or your aged, decrepit, spiteful mother (who still kinda hates you for letting your sibling die)?

📱VOTE NOW ON YOUR PHONES! 📱

The kicker is that NO MATTER WHICH CHOICE YOU MAKE, you still lose your sibling! They're taken by the Chantry, (the ⭕Circle/⛑️Templars) if you leave them at home, and if you take them with you, they fucking DIE.

Oh, UNLESS you brought that one edgy, possessed, fugitive Gray Warden you met in the ass end of Darktown with you. Then they don't die. Instead, they themselves are given to the Gray Wardens to try and save them from 🤎😩The Taint 😩🤎 who then disappear back into the Deep Roads for 3 fucking years. IN FACT you don't even know if your fucking sibling LIVES or DIES until Shit City winds up on fucking 🔥FIRE🔥 and they just happen to run into you while you're up to your tits in body organs.

And also that one edgy Gray Warden rebel, Anders -who you actually kinda like, even if he is a whiney bitch, happens to stay on with you because you helped him kill his ex boyfriend (*Micky Mouse voice* it's a special tool that will help us later!🎁)

Oh, and let's not forget that Grand Adventure where your ancient ass mom 🤶 is kidnapped by a Coo-Coo for Cocoa Puffs serial murderer and then canabalized into a semi-living sex doll 🧟‍♀️(that smells a bit like formaldehyde under the stench of rotting old lady flesh) just because she happens to look a little bit like the dude's dead FWB/wife. 👩‍❤️‍👨

So, when you finally fucking find her -buried under a cesspool of blood, shit and demons (where else?)- you obviously have to kill the dork-ass, serial-killing, LITERAL MOTHERFUCKER who took her.

But OOPS! His blood magic🩸 was the only thing keeping her build-a-bitch body alive, so naturally it disperses as he death-rattles on the floor.🤮

She only lives long enough to say her last regret is leaving you alone in ���️ Murder City™️ 🗡️ by yourself before she fucking DIES IN YOUR ARMS in front of your sad ass friends and probably your love interest.

Speaking of which, I hope you didn't dick-down the pirate 🏴‍☠️ then fuck around and find out you caught feelings and shit, cause she straight up leaves your ass to skip town on bail with a Super Special Book. 📖

And god forbid you romanced Fenris because his broody ass just ups and leaves you after a mediocre as fuck one night stand, leaving you with Lyium-blue balls. 🧪 Oh, did I mention that it took 3 fuckin YEARS of courting to get him to into bed? 🛌 But at least he stays with you, helping kill bitches and whatnot, casually twisting that little knife in your heart an inch at a time because he has enough emotional baggage 🎒👜🧳🛍️ to sink a fucking naval armada to the bottom of the Boeric ocean. 🆘⛵🛥️🛳️⛵🚢🛥️🆘

But the fun doesn't stop there! No, no! Because while you may have lost your entire family -i.e. your mother, father and both baby siblings- and potentially your love interest 💔 (You can keep your shitty drunken uncle tho lmfao), that doesn't matter cause we're not done with our field trip through hell just yet kiddies. 🚎 Beep beep, bitch.

So, what's next on 💥Apocalypse Bingo?💥 Oh, that's right, you gotta stop the invading force of massive roid-raging dragon-people with kick ass horns, and their leader just decapitated the king👑 in front of you.

Also they burned 🗑️Trash Town🗑️ to the ground and you have to pick of the pieces of your shitty city. Again.

And after you've done that, after you've done what all the king's horses 🐎🐎🐎 and all the king's men🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️ couldn't fucking do, you're awarded the title of Champion because no good deed goes unpunished!

Yay! You're the savior of Shit City! Hooray. 💩

✨🌟⭐ But wait! There's more! ⭐🌟✨

That one Glowy Red bitch you've seen around the Gallows when you're not ogling Cullen's noodle hair is pissy at Skeletor the Secret Blood Mage. Time to play peace keeper.

It doesn't go well. They're both still assholes. 🤷🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️

Oh but, remember Anders? The edgy Gray Warden dude? The one who hears voices in his head, but swears it's just his 👻☄️Spirit Friend☄️👻 The one who you kinda like?

He needs to go grocery shopping. For... cookie ingredients. 🍪

Here's the list: 📜

-Mushrooms 🍄

-Literal, actual shit 💩

-Sulfur 💨

-Amonium Nitrate 🔥

-Other shit, this time metaphorical🚫💩

Okay, weird request, right? But he did help you kill some hoes and give you the map to the Deep Roads which may or may not have gotten your sibling killed, so you owe him one, right? And, well, maybe you kinda like this edgy weirdo who occasionally turns blue when he's mad 👺, so you're willing to do him a solid.

Well, turns out that trip to Kirkwalmart wasn't for ingredients to Anders' fav cookies.

It was actually

⚡💥💣☢️A FUCKIN NUKE☢️💣💥⚡

which he uses to blown up the church ⛪ which happens to be in the city 🌇 your pathetic ass spent 6 years Humpty Dumpty-ing🍳 killing a few hundred innocent people and probably at least one or two dogs🐶💀🐶 so either way he's a fuckin dildo.

Oh, and that kicks off World War Thedas, and the FBI 🚔 thinks you're responsible, so you have to leave your Shit City and lay low.

But you got to meet Varric so it was worth it. 👍

Probably.

[emperorofbullshit]

This is gonna be me ranting and whining about how annoyed I am at my own mediocrity and how I manipulate the people around me as a coping mechanism to delude myself into thinking I am doing pretty alright and I shouldn't complain because I have it good

Since 14 years old there has been much discord in my family. My father is an alcoholic and not just a normal one. He would go to work at 6, get off work at 12 and then come home after 6 more hours of drinking. There are 7 days in a week and out of those 7, in at least 5 I have had to hide in my room because I was scared of him. He would yell, he would call me names, he would even make threats saying things like :

"I have 2 sons. Do you see that window? I could throw you out of it and only have one son."

To a 14 year old kid who is scared shitless but can't show emotion on his face, those words were always taken at face value and I always had no doubts on him being unable to keep his words. I am the eldest of 2 sons and thus I had to take the brunt of the "parental dedication", as they call it, and was always pushed for excellence. They would always say : "Get good grades, make good friends, go outside, go study, go do this and go do that" in and out every day. From 3rd grade I have been taking courses on languages, sports and math at times and I would leave home at about 6:45 AM every day to get to school at 7:30 and I would go from school which ended more often than not at 13:30 to English courses and then to either Deutch courses or basketball practice which would end at roughly 6PM.

My parents loved achievements but did next to nothing to help me feel anything other than anger towards getting any. They would always go on and on about good grades so you can get the prize money, good grades so you can get in a good school, good this, good that and I subconsciously avoided being in the spotlight because I actually felt gratification from being able to see their dreams shatter into dust and fir a while, that was the inly thing that kept me going. Just the look on their faces, the tone on their voice, the gleam in their eyes. The gleam of someone realizing that their hopes and dreams of greatness were just turned to dust. I still have that side of me, I just choose to keep it under control but it want's to get loose once a while.

And so my life continued until 9th grade when ai decided to stop all couses because I was sick and tired of them and so I stopped going. Then came high school, this circus, part of which I am as of writing this text most if not all of you will skip because it's just way too long.

In the first year of highschool I had fun. I made some new friends and hung with them a bit and I also met the one person I thought I could trust because she was like me, except unlike me, she still had hope and she still had her parents, albeit controlling, with her, rather than against her.

I gave her counsel when she needed it and we hit it off. She was a great friend while it lasted. I knew from the beginning that she and I would most certanly not make it through the year as friends so I had as much fun as possible with her.

I told her a very tiny fraction about my life and jokingly but never untruthfully told her how my mind works and what I do to people around me, her included. I talked her about relationships once and I helped her out too because she had a guy she liked and he liked her back. This guy just so happened to also be a friend of mine so I thought : "Why not help my friend get together with my other friend?", and subtly but surely I made them get together faster.

That was basically the premise of the first year. A pretty average story but I left out the part where the alcoholism and mental abuse at home never stopped. I put focus on this one girl because helping her out was my coping mechanism.

Then came the second year. This girl had gotten together with her man and they were very happy to be together and still are, after all I am still in my 2nd year of high school writing this, but back to topic. The second year of high school was wierd to say the least because of the pandemic and our classes were split in half. Me, being the pupeteer I am, decided to pull some strings and set my annoying classmates away with sweet words and deals that sounded too good to be true, and ended up with the best classmates I wanted, part of which was my target for the second year. My target was a girl this time. She was and still is, pretty, smart, and very comfortable for me to be around but she and i had never actually talked at all. Wd had exchanged a sentence once on our 1st year and that's it. I spent a few days observing her and noticed that she was a loner, she didn't exactly have friends amongst the classmates, so I thought : "Well that's as good a chance as any.", and started talking to her and walked her home after school. We became friends and were going out daily after school to get a drink somewhere and one day, as I had planned, 2 fellow classmates show up and I tell them to sit with us and so began my act and my strategy on building her a group of friends. The group wasn't too big. It was me, her, the other 2 classmates, a friend of mine and the girl from the 1st year of highschool. We were all classmates so we all had fun and talked and we developed into a true griend group. Well, as good a group as any can be with me in it. Time passed an I noticed I was really not interested in this girl I had set as my target so I just let her go to do her thing and cut my puppet strings there.

I did all of this because I wanted to prove to myself something, I don't even know what it was anymore because it lost value in my eyes and so I just cut my strings on everyone and let them free. My social life was evolving for the better, which was good and all, but my familial life was degrading and devolving at such speeds that weren't even funny anymore.

My father would come drunk, lecture me for hours on end about the most uselss things in existence, and he would always call me names and berate me on everything. He had even come to me with a big kitchen knife pointed at my chest and said : "I will kill you and eat your heart if you dont do what I want"

I am still afraid of him and i still have trauma gron him so I still didn't doubt his words because when your father comes to your room at 10 PM holding a knife to your chest while your back is agains the wall, you then realize that bad things can really be considered good compared to other things.

I was living in fear. Every day I would pretend to be asleep for hours on end so I could avoid him and maybe be spared but that was just wishful thinking.

While my soocial life evolved, my familial life kept devolving. My father would come drunk more often, fight more often with my mother, screm more, curse more and shout more. I was honestly getting pretty fed up with his bullshit. One day, he woke up from his nap and he was still drunk and started lecturing me on what "Sons of bitches, idiots and parasites" every single member of my moms side of the family, my mother included was. I was very pissed and my knuckles had gone wbite form me clenching them that hard.

My mother got home mid lecture and thy started fighting again. First it was just verbal insults and slurs, but it got worse and worse untol my father literaly ran at my mother prepated to choke her.

That.

That was the moment I had my first meltdown in my life. I saw him run and I saw his hands on her throat and I just had one simple directive in my mund telling me one thing : "Whatever made you feel this way must be eliminated"

And that was what I tried to do. I ran and pushed him away from my mother and then punched my dad so hard he crashed into the wall and made a dent. I would probably have killed him there if it wasn't for my father's brother who came to us because of all the noise, stopping me. He tried to get me away from my father and when I did and my father got up and tried to punch me while my uncle was blaming my mom fir the situation, I grabbed both him and my dad and threw them to the wall. I would probably have been bruised because thwy are both fat and I was in complete meltdown just screaming in the rage of years and years of mental torture and violent self loathing which had build up behind the dam and only sought a way out. They eventually split us up and I was crying and yelling. I could barely breathe, my lungs just couldn't take in air fadt enough for my heart which was beating so hard that thunder would sound like a butterfly's wings beating. I opened the windows on my room and put 3 quarters of my body outside the window , risking to fall and die but I didn't care anymore. The rage had subsided, having found an exit and without it to push me, I was just a broken kid that just sought desperately the help which noone gave. Not my parents, not my friends, not even those who considered themselves and to my face said "We are best friends, we help each other". I never got any help and nobody even saw that I broke down. I dropped hint after hint after hint that I needed someone to talk to, someone to say a few words to me, someone to just listen to anything I wanted to say, yet all I got was nothing. I noticed that none of these so called friends or best friends care about anything. Thwy didn't even notice that when I took my shirt off to change for PE, I had bruises in my back and chest. Nobody said anything or did anything so i also did nothing.

Everybody just seemed to go on their own way and nobody wanted to even acknowledge what had happened or what help I needed.

I am still bitter and mad at everyone but especually at my "best friend" to whom I say the following :

V. You know who this account belongs to. You know me in real life and you know I'm not lying because I don't waste my time like that. You know damn well that if yku read this entire thing and see things just a small 1(one) percent of how I saw things, you wouldn't call youself my acquaintance, let alone my best friend.

To anyone that made it to the end and actually read it, please realize that no matter what, no matter where, you cannot rely on those you consider dear without knowing for certain that they also consider you dear.

[theannaredfield]

Resident Evil 8 Overview/Review

Ah yes. The moment everyone has been waiting for. I’ve completed the game and now it’s time to hear my final thoughts. Spoilers under the cut.

To start out with, the opening cinematic was amazing, beautifully animated

I do have some big issues with Mia here, as she does seem to just brush off Ethan’s concerns, and even seemingly gaslight him at times. There’s a lack of communication, and it’s causing them issues. Mia wants to just forget and pretend it didn’t happen, annoyed that Ethan keeps being up the events of 7, while Ethan is scared, worried something might happen again and feel like he can’t just let it go (it’s very likely that both of them have trauma, and the fact that Mia refuses to have them work through it is unhealthy). Plus Ethan makes comments about Mia being scary when she’s angry... it just seems like she might be abusing him, mostly just mentally. Downplaying his concerns and what not.

Aside from that I LOVE Ethan’s character development in this game! He’s so much more alive and seemingly present, I love his comments and stuff, and just not having him be a hallow husk this time!

Some of the cutscenes happened way earlier than I expected them to, and played out differently too. Subverting expectations, good.

There are absolutely 100% multiple assets in the entire game that can and most likely will be reused for RE4 Remake.

This game may not have a bondage kink, but it definitely has a hand torture kink. (Seriously what the fuck. Let Ethan have his hands.)

I really enjoyed fighting the daughters. I thought it was cool and unique (also it was fun to go around and shatter all the windows). I also went to the trouble of knife fighting them for the full experience

Also I can’t believe the daughters are BUG PEOPLE! Oh my god I didn’t expect that, and it just surprises me and like, I’m so happy. They did it. They made the vampires scientific. I’m proud of them.

I’m sorry simps, but Lady Dimitrescu was nothing more than the introductory boss, which is probably why they pushed her so much. After killing her, then you find out the full... situation I guess you could call it.

THEY CRYSTALLIZED MY BABY

I thought house Beneviento was really interesting, however it felt like it was out of some horror game other than resident evil. Like I expected to get attacked by dolls, which was very stressful when it finally did happen, but.... the fetus was... unexpected and disgusting. I mean good, I didn’t see that coming at all but JESUS CHRIST

Speaking of things I didn’t expect in a Resident Evil game, THEY DISMEMBERED AND CRYSTALLIZED MY FUCKING BABY. Like damn I never expected us to go this dark.

I feel like house Beneviento could’ve had a lot more doll action, considering she was the doll maker, but I guess what we got was okay.

It kinda sucks that the Beneviento treasure gets locked off if you don’t go to the tomb right after the boss fight. Like, I don’t think it should’ve locked itself again, especially because not everyone might’ve figured it out. Me and my uncle personally thought we had to go find yellow flowers to put on the grave, we weren’t even thinking about the tombstone. It was basically the only treasure we didn’t get because I didn’t think to look there, nor did I know I was suppose to.

Moreau was just... kinda sad. I felt bad for the dude. He was just trying to do his best and be as good as his other siblings, but he just.. wasn’t. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I felt bad for Lady D and her children too, but Moreau was just a dude trying his best to impress his “mother”

Once again, they subverted my expectations, because Moreau was not a rehash of the RE4 Del Lago fight, very different actually! I’m happy about that.

PS, we see Chris again around here, once again surprising me, but it kinda gives you a “did Chris just... die?” Moment.

I can see why Heisenberg was the second most advertised Lord, because he has the next biggest section, but he’s also the last sibling. He’s also split into 2 parts, the factory and the stronghold. (Kinda sucks because it shows Moreau and Donna got the short end of the stick.)

The stronghold wasn’t that bad, though me and my uncle do wonder if we learned more about the 4 founders and just forgot or what. Like we got the cup from Luiza and that plate, was there more? Maybe.

The factory... Jesus Christ, if the fetus didn’t give me anxiety, this place sure as hell does. Between the fucking FAN MAN and The drill dudes.. Jesus Christ.

Also I can’t stop thinking of Elijah Kamski when dealing with Heisenberg because they have the same voice actor and would probably get along.

This area is... long. Like hella long. (Talking about the factory)

The Heisenberg fight was cool, I loved Ethan just taking hold of whatever that creation was and going ham.

Chris’s part was pretty short, however I feel it was nice, could’ve been longer.

So Miranda and Spencer were a thing and she inspired him and he stole the cave design from the walls..? Weird but okay, I guess I’ll accept it (kinda undermines their genius though.)

So I was right, Moreau and Donna were cognitively delayed, as expected.

Mia is alive, nice to know but

What in the silent hill “you’ve been dead all along” bullshit is this. I’m gonna need to know exactly when Miranda replaced Mia and exactly when Ethan died.

I need a fix it fic to fix the sadness I feel about Ethan dying. He saved his daughter but he doesn’t even get to watch her grow up?! Fuck! My family issues can’t handle this shit. I want Ethan to get to escape with his daughter and watch her grow up.

Fuck this, they didn’t have to kill Ethan. How could they. God damn it (I know he probably would’ve died anyway cause of the mold but FUCK!

LET US SEE HIS FACE, HE’S DEAD NOW YOU ASSHOLES.

Rose is pretty and id love to see her again. But does she age fast because of mold powers

Just... fuck man. I liked the game, I really did but the ending hurt my fucking soul.

Also, so the BSAA are bad guys now? Shit, I sure hope Jill’s okay.

I can’t believe they killed Ethan, he was the only protagonist they had the BALLS to kill. They could’ve just let the dad go home with his baby. Fuck you guys. Fuck you.

[thestarkerisobvious]

A Better Ghost Story

amazing art work by @starker-sorbet​        

A snugglefic for @mrstarksbabyy​

With great thanks for the betaread by @mrstarksbaby​

You know who you are.

Sixteen:    The DeSlaughter House

4    A Better Ghost Story

Like Peter’s house, the DeSlaughter house had a front door that was never used.  The two boys sat on the little front cement front porch that Mke’s dad had made.  They sat awkwardly for a long time before Mike spoke.

“Look, I’m sorry I said… I don’t know if you heard or not, but I told the guys sometimes there were strange lights over your house.  Or whatever.  I didn’t mean anything by it.”

Peter opened his mouth, but nothing came out.  For a moment he looked around the DeSlaughter yard, as if he were thinking.  The yard looked so different from his own, a large patch of grass scattered with multiple bikes and toys and sports equipment and fishing gear leaning against the wall.  It told a story of a life so much different than Peter’s, a life of siblings and parents who took their kids camping and boating and fishing.  Peter had always lived a solitary life, even in New York City.  The life of an only child whose guardians were elderly on the day he met them.

Finally he realized Mike was waiting for him to speak. 

He shrugged.  “I wasn’t mad mad, I was just like, confused.  I’ve lived in that house for three years now, and I’ve never seen strange lights there.”

“It’s just that my parents said that.  They said they had seen that before I was born.”

“Well that was before I was born too, so why should I give a care?  Look, I know the guys talk about me when I’m not there…”

“They talk about you a lot when you’re not there,” Mike admitted, looking at his bare feet.

“Well, that’s their problem, isn’t it?” Peter snapped, repeating Aunt May’s favorite saying without thinking.

“Hey don’t get mad at me.  Look, the weird-light thing is the only thing I’ve said about your house, and I could have said a lot of things, Peter,” Mike said, his voice raising suddenly, then just as suddenly he closed his mouth hard.

“Okay, okay, no problem,” Peter said carelessly, looking away again.  Normally when voices were raised, especially when it was a boy his age, Peter walked away.  He could certainly do that today (Mrs. DeSlaughter was inside making his pancakes now) but quite suddenly he decided on a different tactic.

“You know, whatever.  I just don’t know I couldn’t care less about boys who brag about how many F’s they got in science…” he casually, making Mike grin with the inside joke.  “Look, I’ll make you a deal, I’ll forget the whole thing.  If you tell me every strange story you know about my house.”

“Oh there are tons…” Mike said, hopping up from the step, no longer looking embarrassed.  Peter relaxed.  Mike had taken the deal.  It wasn’t a deal that made a lot of sense, but it was a deal, and Mike had taken it.

“Ok, so like the first Post lady was a witch who was running away from the Spanish Inquisition.  Like her whole family was.  And how the girls all had to learn Portuguese so they could read all her witch’s spellbooks.  And how right before the Civil War the whole family made a deal with the devil and they could fly, and swing from tree to tree like Tarzan and outrun cars like the Six Million Dollar Man…”

“It sounds like you’re describing my favorite comic books,” Peter said, laughing.

“Yeah, it’s really weird.  And there was this one Post son whose skin could stop bullets, only he died in the Civil War because he thought he could stop cannon balls.  And right before the Civil War?  Tom Dylan Post chopped up that girl who wouldn’t marry him, because she didn’t want to marry into that crazy-witch-devil family?  And he disappeared like that,” Mike snapped his fingers.  “And the whole town went to the Post Homestead to search for him, like the sheriff and the girl’s family and everybody, and the family said he had left for Tennessee but no one had seen him go, like on the only road out of town or something, and they never found him.  Because he was hiding in an underground house that his family had dug for him, and he had to live there for the rest of his whole life.  And he died down there and they couldn’t bury him onaccounta’ they couldn’t let on that they had been hiding him, so his body is down there to this very day…”

“Wait… wait!” Peter said laughing.  “Now this sounds like a Tale from the Crypt comic book, and I never waste my money on those!  Wait, this is a cool story, why isn’t this story of my haunted house??  Dying in an underground house you had to live your whole life in is a much better story than Evan Post’s pigs didn’t die in the Great Pig Die-off of 1935…”

They laughed for a while, and for a few minutes they compared Tales from the Crypt plots, debating which ones would fit in well with Peter’s haunted house.  

Then Peter remembered why he had run all the way there in the first place.

“So… why are you… why are we talking about this anyway?  I never told anyone I was mad about the lights thing.  I mean it was annoying, but I didn’t tell anybody about it.”

Mike’s face clouded and he looked away.  And his answer didn’t surprise Peter at all.

“I dunno,” he shrugged.  “I think I dreamed about it last night, or something.  And then I woke up this morning and my mom was all like ‘Why is everyone so mean to that sweet Peter?’”  Peter laughed at his high falsetto tone.  “He’s so sweet and so smart and polite and nice all the time and he’s an orphan!’  And I’m like ‘He’s not exactly Little Orphan Annie, mom.’”  

“No, not exactly,” Peter said, laughing at the picture.

“Hey man, I always stand up for you when the boys start to talk.  I told them Missy really is your girlfriend, and you’ve probably gotten to second base…”

“Oh crap no!”  Peter said suddenly, his eyes going wide.  “No, Mike, for serious.  Please don’t tell anybody that.  Missy is terrified of her father, I mean seriously she talks about him all the time.  She says he’ll kill her and me both if he ever sees us holding hands together…”

“Then why does she hold your hand?” Mike objected.

“That’s what I said!!  I mean when we’re walking home from school if she hears a car coming she’ll jump over to the other side of the street so it doesn’t look like we’re walking together and I’m like ‘Well maybe you should just stop holding my hand please?!  And she tells me this weird story about how some girl that used to live on her land wanted to marry some boy that lived on my land, and how the girl’s father didn’t want them to…”

“Yeah, that’s Laura Foster.  That’s the girl Tom Dylan Post cut up with his big bowie knife.”

“Okay that just makes it weirder, Mike.”

“Peter?  Seriously?  Shut up.  I mean it man, you have got to stop complaining about girls wanting to hold your hand.  That’s why they talk about you at school.  No matter how crazy she is you can’t complain that you’ve already gotten to first base with her,” Mike explained, shaking his head solemnly.  It irritated Peter, watching Mike trying to sound like a wise old man, dispensing his wisdom.  Mike was two months younger than he was.

“It’s not all the books you read, or how you seem to know more than the science teachers do, or how you’ve never fired a gun,” Mike was continuing.  “And it’s not really the Post-Ghost.  It’s because you’re from New York City and you think it’s normal that fairies and queers just walk around like it’s nothin’.  It’s because you’re from New York City and you don’t even own a single Playboy or anything.

“Is that what the magazine I was supposed to find in the shed?  The one I didn’t see because I thought the prank was about the dead squirrel on the floor?  And that was supposed to be gross or something, but I don’t know how I’m supposed to be a veterinarian or an exterminator if I get grossed out by a dead squirrel….”

“I don’t know anything about the squirrel.  Yeah, there was a magazine in there you were supposed to find.”  

“What was it?  A Playboy?” Peter asked, hoping he sounded casual.  Hoping Mike couldn’t tell how hard it was to act casual right now.

“Or something else?  Like a Playgirl?”

Mike shrugged and looked at his feet.  “I don’t know if it was a Playgirl or what, I mean it didn’t have a cover.  Cole found it in this box of old books, at his uncle’s house, he said.  It was all these men with big mustaches doing nasty stuff.  It was so gross.  It was Buster that put in the shed and said we should prank you with it.  I told them you saw that sort of thing in New York City all the time but Buddy said it would be funny.”

“Weird.  Cole’s uncle is weird.”

“I’ll say.  You know what I heard?”  But then Mike’s dad was calling them from inside.  

Knowing how many members of the household had dreamed about him, it didn’t really surprise Peter that Mr. DeSlaughter was now shaking his hand, asking him how he was and generally acting like they had been best friends who had been separated for years.

“Sorry to hear about your dog.  I used to bury all my pets out in a cemetery my brothers and I had made in the yard behind our house.  Call your uncle and tell him I’ll come over.  If you’ve got snakes I’ll be able to tell…” and then continued to discuss snake bite symptoms for the rest of breakfast.  Peter listened attentively.  Mike’s dad was as good as any science teacher.

After Peter had finished off his pancakes (and assured Mike’s mother that he didn’t want anything else to eat, he had to assure her many times) he was pointed to the kitchen phone to call home.

Walking toward the phone, Peter was struck, for a moment, at the irony.  (Not irony, his English teacher would tell him.  This was not irony.  This was coincidence.)  

There was a time when Peter had a great fear of phones.  Just the idea of dialing a number himself made his stomach hurt and his palms sweat.  He had nightmares, as a child, of the clear plastic rotary dial spinning around endlessly, knowing he couldn’t have possibly dialed the right number.  May always dialed the phone when he wanted to talk to his friends, but when he turned 12 Ben said he was too old for that and made her stop.  As an experiment, he fed that fear to Tony, but only after carefully writing out the instructions in one of his notebooks, titled “How To Use A Rotary Phone.”

And he needed them.  Two days ago he found the instructions by accident and read them with fascination.  He spent the whole morning practicing calling numbers, time, the weather, the radio station to make a request.  He practiced dialing his home number and listened to the busy signal over and over again.  That-Peter found the whole procedure delightful.  That-Peter couldn’t imagine the boy who had been afraid of it.

This-Peter realized that the entire DeSlaughter family was watching him now.  He turned around and smiled at them.

“You have a touch-tone phone.  I’ve always wanted one.  Those are cool.”

“I can play Mary-Had-A-Little-Lamb on it!” Monica trumpeted as Peter dialed home.

* * * * *

Peter’s friends’ parents had taken them to quite a few outdoor plays in the city.  Peter felt like he was in a play now.  He hoped he was remembering all his lines.

Sitting in the cab of the pickup truck with Mike’s dad while the two boys rode in the back (riding in the back of a truck never looked safe to Peter) he made polite noises while Mr. DeSlaughter tried to talk him into going on hunting trips with them in the summer, or working for him after school was over.  At the house he dutifully took them on “the tour” because Aunt May had declared him the expert.  At the table he kept up his side in an argument about which was better, Super Friends or the Super Powers Team and why Apache Chief was a terrible superhero.  

It wasn’t all bad.  Mr. DeSlaughter and Uncle Ben stood outside and talked for ages, and Aunt May fussed over lunch for the three boys as if she had been doing it her whole life.  Still, Peter couldn’t help watch the clock.  Counting the hours.  Calculating how long he had to wait until he could talk to Tony.

After lunch he took Matthew and Mike to climb his favorite trees, and to see the owls’ nest in the barn.  He even took them to the lake where he pointed out the dead oak that pointed the way back to the chimney and the shed.

“They said Tom Dylan cut up his girlfriend because she really wanted to marry his brother,” Matthew was lecturing as Mike and Peter tossed rocks into the water.  “But Laura Foster didn’t want to marry him at all.  Like she was best friends with his sisters, so she was always at his house, at your house, all the time.  Because that’s where her best friends lived.  Only he didn’t know that, and thought she was there to see him.

“Why would she be best friends with his sisters if she didn’t like his witch-devil-running-from-the-inquisition family?”  

“She didn’t mind being their friends, but she didn’t want to marry into the family.  Once you marry “into a family” it’s different.  Now you’re a part of them.”

“How do you even know all this anyway, smartypants,” Peter needled.  He actually liked Matthew, just like he liked Monica, but felt obliged to talk down to them out of loyalty to Mike.

“Our Mee-ma grew up here, our Mom’s grandma.  Her whole family is from here.  She can tell you anything.  She’s full of old stories, and Matthew is her favorite.”

Peter thought about that for a moment, looking up at the ridge.  Beyond that was the shed, which he’d be happy to burn to the ground right now.  But there was also the lone chimney and foundation to a small house that stood there too, another Post house where some Post family member had lived.  It piqued his interest, now.   

“I should talk to your Mee-ma.  I can interview her for that Social Studies project we’re supposed to do.  That’s probably a good idea.”

“Why do you want to do that?” Mike said with an eyeroll.

Peter smiled.  For a very brief moment, he suddenly didn’t feel like he was acting at all.

“Because all your looser-ghost stories about my house are all boring.   I think it’s time to write up a better one.”

---------------------------------------

The next chapter of SIXTEEN will be posted on Monday.

Master (Post)

---------------------------------------

[be-more-chill-evan-hansen]

BLACK FRIDAY SPOILERS

The following post contains spoilers for the new musical, Black Friday, by Team Starkid. Continue reading at your own risk. 

MY FAVORITE PARTS FROM THE BLACK FRIDAY DIGITAL TICKET + OTHER COMMENTARY (IN ORDER OF HOW THEY APPEAR) WHILE WATCHING IT FOR THE 4TH OR 5TH TIME [contains very harsh and explicit language]

**These points will be brought up in another post (involving the Hatchetfield Universe theories)

The ENTIRETY of the Wiggly jingle at the beginning

Jaime saying “his belly’s so squishy!” while jumping up and down

The tights

“Uncle Wiley, where does Wiggly come from?”

James Tolbert (Team Starkid choreographer-turned-actor) STOLE the show

Curt Mega’s dancing in that song killed me

“DO THE WIGGLE!”

ROBERT AND JAMES DANCING WAS EVERYTHING

**Paul still doesn’t like musicals? (I have a theory of where this show takes place in the Hatchetfield Universe but that’s for another post)

The way Paul looks at Emma when she’s on her Cabbage Patch Kid rant!

“I’m Paul. I’m Emma’s...boyfriend.”//“Well, we haven’t put a label on it yet.”//“But we are intimate.” (Bonus: Emma’s glare)

Paul is still awkward I love him.

“I do not get flashbacks. I remember bad things vividly.”

“Thank you for your service.”//“I didn’t do it for you.”

“Ski-ball sucks.” (I wholeheartedly disagree but whatever)

Grace Chastity is Tom’s babysitter for Tim confirmed

Okay. Okay. Okay. OKAY. 

TOM JUST WANTS TO MAKE IT UP TO HIS SON BECAUSE HE FEELS GUILTY ABOUT THE CRASH I’M SOFT

DYLAN SAUNDERS STILL STEALING HEARTS

WHY DO YOU GIVE DYLAN ALL OF THE HEART-WRENCHING SONGS????? I DON’T NEED TO CRY AT 4AM

THE LIGHTING 

 “Excuse me, miss. Do you think it’s okay for me to park here?”//“Yeah, it says ‘no parking at any time’ but I’m sure the loading trucks can just park across the street. Does that work for you?”

“If I won’t support my drinking habit, who will?”

“Hark, the herald angels sing. Glory to a newborn king. A fuckin’ furry little monster’s gonna make me a pile of cash.”

“Tell me, Lex. Do you know why they call it Black Friday?”//“Because it comes after Thursday?”

“Well, friend-o. I have a feeling that these little babies are going to take you so far into the black that you ain’t never comin’ back.” *long uncomfortable pause*

“Oh, you’re gonna make a killin’. That’s an Uncle Wiley’s Toys guarantee!”

FRANK HUGGING THE BOX OF WIGGLYS

“Hark, the herald angels sing. Glory to a newborn king. Peace on Earth, and lots of money. MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY just for ME.”

JON’S VOICE AS WIGGLY I CAN’T

“mALL security we got a shoplifter. Drop that doll!” (His voice crack killed me oh my God)

HIS OUTFIT (The first time I saw him I went “Oh my God he’s emo”)

“Where’s my sister?”// “Oh no.” *stares dramatically* “Hannah?” *even more dramatic* “Is that what you’ve been telling me every day for the past four weeks? To pick up your kid sister?” *grabbing Lex* “Oh, I must’ve forgot because I’m so stupid.” Ethan needs to take up drama

“Do I gotta put a leash on you like a dog, or my cousin Oliver?” 

“Don’t pull her.”//*voice crack* “I’m nOt.”

“Alright banana split.” i’m not crying 

“You see this hat? This was gifted to me by a great warrior.” *Lex laughs*/*Ethan turns around slowly* “Don’t you fuckin’ laugh.”

“I’d make a great dad, I’m just sayin’.” (Ethan isn’t a horrible person he’s just misguided)

“My mom’s a bitch!”

Honestly the way Ethan looks at Lex

*in the middle of singing* “That’s not how cameras work, babe.”

Hannah’s dancing

ROBERT’S WIGGLES DURING “We’re missing in action.”

“Dear mom, it’s been real."

“I’d say you did your best, but I’m not a liar.”//“Oh, L-I-E-R, babe.”//“We get it Ethan, you’re a good speller.”

“PS: Get yourself a new trailer, because this one? Is BROKE AS SHIT!”

Robert in skinny jeans. Can Robert wear skinny jeans more often please?

Hannah doing the “smoking” thing with her hands.

“Hannah! What the fuck is this [imitating it]?That better be fucking FLOSS.”

UGH LAUREN AS LINDA MONROE IS LEGENDARY

“That’s called a bribe, sir, and it’s illegal...or it should be.”

“I have four boys. Four beautiful, blond, boys.”

“Do you really think your children are better than everyone else’s.”// “In so many words, YES.”

“I hope you don’t get a Wiggly. I hope you fucking die.”

“Well, my children were accidents.”

“Stop crying, Gerald. I wasn’t talking to you.”

The way Tom and Becky looked at each other when they met again ugh.

Whatever that song is called when the Hatchetfield citizens were gossiping about it like I think it’s called “What Do You Say?” or something?

“Tom’s put on some weight.”

“I heard Tom is seeing things.”

Jon is serving looks.

The dance they did when they said “all the years that had fun” killed me

Curt Mega is a treasure

“It’s cold out.”//“Nothing really.”//“How are things?”//“Haven’t seen it.”

“Oh my, God, it’s a train-wreck.”//“My favorite.”//“Give me my tub of popcorn.”//“Just skip to the fucking.”//“She’d never--.”//“Either way this is torture porn.”

“I think I’ll step in and save her.”// “You don’t have half of a chance, bitch.”

“THERE, she looked at his crotch.”//“He looked at her boobs.”

“I like dolls. I’m just kidding. I don’t like dolls. At least, not like that.”// “I missed you.” *everyone freaks out*

The dance that looks like a beating heart around them I love.

“Did you know if you spend money, your kids will love you maybe.”

COREY DORRIS NEEDS APPRECIATION BYE

“Give us your fucking money. Give us your fucking cash.”

SERIOUSLY I CAN’T WAIT FOR THIS RECORDING

“Do we have any morality.”

“What’s a grown man going to do with 85 dolls?”// “Well, one will stay in the box for posterity. One will be used exclusively for bath time.”

“If you’re going to make with the hysterics, TAKE IT TO MACY’S.”// “How dare you. Are you hearing this, Gerald? Yes, call my attorney.”

“I’ll tickle one doll, and one doll will tickle me.”

The bidding war.

“Get your hands off her.”// “Fuck YOU.”

The lighting slowly gets red when they start bidding.

“$800.”//“$3.”//“Can I use these coupons?”

“Well, if you’re not going to sell me that doll, I guess I’ll just gonna have to take it.”

“If he gets one, I’m getting four.” *Linda climbs the counter like Draco*

So the lighting during “Feast or Famine” is just???? The green and red??? Like holiday colors but at the same time it’s representative of greed and rage???? 

Just all of “Feast or Famine”

“What’s shaking banana, you okay?” I’M HAVING FEELINGS UGH

“What’s up with that grammar. Even I know it’s ‘more badder’.” Ethan no

ETHAN NO

“Give me that fucking doll I’m in a hurry.” Okay, Jeff you freaking gremlin man

WHO BRINGS A KNIFE SHOPPING?? Unless he stole that, too.

“Do you see him? Do you see him? Do you see him?”//“YES, I fucking see him!”

James as “Obama” I’m crying

“I’ll hold onto the little...uh...whippersnapper.”

“While you three devise a strategy, I’ll hold on to the little friend.”// “Shut the fuck up!”

“You’re nothing more than a Harvard Law School community organizing prick!” I’M SCREAMING

“Take one step closer to my fwendy-wend and I’ll rip your fucking throat out with my own teeth.”

“No, he’s mine! Back off or I will send a laser-guided ballistic missile to your house in Denver. You’ll be scraping off what’s left of your kids off the FUCKING pavement.”

“MORRIS. Give me that COCK-SUCKING MOTHERFUCKING COCK-A-DOODLE-DOLL” CURT MEGA IS A TREASURE 

“I’ll bite your dick off!”

THE AUDIENCE (AND MY) REACTION TO MCNAMARA 

*Obama voice* “Oh, I’m gonna vomit.”

“I hope you don’t mind if I let myself in.”// “Into the oval office?”

“Monsters and Men” IS A BOP

*yeets the Wiggly off stage*

“DECK THE HALLS” IS A BOP

I would 100% watch “Santa Claus is Going to High School” unironically

“Jingle! Jangle! If anyone sees two elves in my locker, I’ll get expelled for sure.”

The dancing UGH

Lauren is the cutest elf ever

PART THREE OF LAUREN AND ROBERT DOING A CUTE DANCE TOGETHER

“What the fuck am I watching?”

Becky talking about her ex-husband breaks my heart. I would die for her.

“You say you killed your family. I hope I killed mine.” My heart is breaking help me

Becky and Tom are freaking CUTE

“Take Me Back” is the cutest song ever

All of the times the characters mention other dimensions and stuff??? Each has a different context, but Joey’s character did say that Hatchetfield was a special town earlier in the show so????

All of the making out I’m done

Becky’s leg

“I knew you weren’t Santa.”//“A red tricycle.”//“SANTA!” *starts making out*

“This is the best movie ever!”

Robert has to make out with two people every day.

**PEIP deals with Paranormal, Extraterrestrial, and Interdimensional stuff, so if TGWDLM was Extraterrestrial, and BF is Interdemensional, will Nerdy Prudes Must Die be Paranormal? Will we see PEIP again? [I’M GOING TO MAKE A SEPARATE POST ABOUT THE THEORIES WITHIN THE UNIVERSE]

**“There are many dimensions, sir.”

“You want to send me into the fucking Twilight Zone to have a sit-down with the devil?”

“They will build him his birth canal.” Ew

Sherman Young is so freaking creepy

“Wiggly is good. Wiggly is just.”

“Bring forth the infidels.”

*as Linda walks onto the stage* “MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER”

“I dislike that word, Gerald. Cult. No, it’s a new, exciting religion that I started.”

“I’ve met God, He had nothing nice to say about you.”

“Adore Me” is a BOP

“You’ll kneel before me. Kiss my toe.”

“I will destroy everything, and then I will destroy everything. I guarantee I’ll destroy everything in my path. Unless I get what I--shit, Gerald.”

The followers repeating “I get what I shit.”

THE TIE AROUND JON’S HEAD KILLS ME

“I want you to know what I mean when I say my evil shit, ‘kay?”

TEAM STARKID PLEASE MAKE LAUREN A VILLAIN MORE OFTEN

“What’s shaking banana?” DON’T DO THIS TO ME

Evil Ethan hurts me

Hannah doesn’t deserve this

“I’m in the Black and White now. It’s just like California. It never ends.”

“I swear on my own grave.” I’M

Hannah calling Wiggly out on his bullshit

“Well, Webby is a stupid bitch.” JON UGH

“I’m going to eat you riiiight the fuuuuck nowwwww.” This scene just makes me want to give Hannah a hug

“We don’t get tricked. We’re grown-ups.” GROWN-UPS ARE THE ONLY ONES BEING TRICKED I CAN’T WITH THIS MUSICAL

“Tom, how could you? You let her get away!”

Dylan jumping at an audience member

I know people think that Ethan’s magic hat thing was bullshit but like the syringe missed Hannah so like?? 

“You think that in the Netherlands they care about some toy? Hah! Nah, they’re too busy enjoying their free vacations and free health care.”

Made In America is A BOP

THE SNIGGLES

BIG WIGGLY

I feel like Made in America won’t have the same punch on the soundtrack.

Joey’s falsetto

R.I.P. General John McNamara

“MERRY CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER!”

“Uh, oh, Mr. Prezy-wez. It seems you’ve misplaced your bomby-womb. Don’t worry. I’m sure it will turn up somewhere.”

“We’ve lost Moscow, sir.”

“He baited us into World War Three.”//*Wiggly giggles* “That tickles.”

“Is this what I live for? To be choked in a toy store?”

“Black Friday” is such a beautiful song though

“Did I need her more than she needed me?” I’m crying please stop

“I’m authorizing you to use my firearm.”

“Monsters and Men” reprise is PERFECT

“Kids don’t want that piece of shit.”//“What?”//“They’re all into Fortnight, dude!”

“I mean, you’re like 40! You probably think your life is over!”

“Everyone is dying, and that includes me, too.” Jeff is a lyrical genius but he needs to back off of whatever angsty juice he’s drinking.

“If I fail you one more time, the punishment won’t match the crime, cause there’s no pain that could ever explain how I let you down.”

“I failed you once, and I will fail again.” I cried when I watched this the first time

“If I Fail You” is such an emotional song

“Alright, let’s go.”//“Fuck, yeah! Should I move these boxes first?”//“Fuck, yeah.”

Charlotte? Where did you come from???

“The only man that’ll have her now is Jack Daniels.”

“And you, you little shit.” Says Draco, the little shit.

“A magic hat? That’s ridiculous. Only dolls are magic.”

“Is this some kind of a joOoOoOoke?”

“Answer me, or I’ll cut your mouth open with my FUCKING KNIFE.”

“You’re a fucking moron.”// “Then you’ve been out-fucked by a fucking moron.”

Lauren’s wiggles during “He will wigglewigglewigglewigglewiggle his way into life.”

“Wiggle” is such a silly song but the harmonies and choreography????? Iconic.

ROBERT’S TWIRL???

JAMES’ DEATH DROP????

EVERYONE’S SEPARATE WIGGLES????

The crying when Becky shot Linda.

“Gerald? It’s Gary. Yep, we need to talk about the will. Goldstein!”

The red light that symbolized Wiggly being on fire.

The followers deciding to burn with Wiggly.

“I have this cooky, reclusive Biology professor.” *audience loses their shit*

“What am I supposed to do without my iPhone?”//“Wear a watch?”

“What If Tomorrow Comes” is such a haunting song

Kendall’s voice is so GOOD!

HOT CHOCOLATE BOY?

MR. DAVIDSON?

BILL?

The dabbing

Hannah and Lex hugging

Paul hugging Emma and Bill

The Hot Chocolate Boy and the Cinema Kid holding hands honestly adorable and I lowkey ship

A little bit of instrumentals from “Not Your Seed” in the end-credit music?? (From the lyric “Look what happened, nightmare time.”)

That’s it. It’s very long, but those were either my favorite parts or small things I noticed. Mostly just my thoughts.

[hpdabbles]

Kindness and Remorse

Dudley Dursley never realized just what terrible people his parents are, how terrible he is as well, until the day his cousin had them move for their own protection. Harry Potter was the house freak, barely a boy and more of a toy that he could take out his aggression out on without a hint of punishment for all of his life.

The target of Harry Hunting, a game he and his friends like to play and the little oddball living under the stairway in the cupboard wasn’t a child in his mind. Not like the kids at school, who he also tormented but not nearly as bad as Harry. Those kids had parents or friends who would attempt to stand up for him, and there were times they did get him to back off.

Dudley was a bully. There wasn’t another way to describe him. He liked hurting kids; thought it was all just some big joke. He felt powerful, in control and had the disillusion that people who didn’t agree with him were in the need to be corrected by any means. 

He ruled the playground with a group of numbers then when he was ordered to lose weight and join boxing he ruled the school with fists and threats. Kids his graded hated him, but they were too afraid to do anything in retaliation. The teacher either didn’t care or thought it was pointless to try. He wasn’t worth the effort, just another bad apple that would rot away on his own.

His parents never minded, they let him get away with everything which could be a form of abuse some claim in their own way.  

But the point being Dudley was a bully who had no limits when it came to Harry.  Just like his parents. 

Because in the house found at 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey England, Harry Potter wasn’t and never would be considered a human. Not a little boy, not a young man, and certainly not someone worth anything.

Despite all of this and every problem they left in the bloke’s mind, Harry still wanted to protect them. He stopped that terrifying ghost thing from attacking them (though at the time he couldn’t see them. Dementors they were called) breaking his world’s law about magic and sent them away. 

He stayed behind to fight some lunatic that killed his parents- wasn’t that a shock? His aunt and uncle weren’t drunks who died in a car crash but were instead murdered in their home with Harry the sole survivor- standing at the door with a grim face as his parents complain every second about it. 

As if though they weren’t leaving behind a child to fight a monster. As if though that same child who is filled with so much kindness was willing to save them when in all honestly he had every right to let them die. 

Harry, the one treated the less human in that house, was more of a man than Vernon or Dudley could ever be.

He stayed behind to fight a secret war against someone the adults should have dealt with and all Dudley could have offered him was an awkward farewell and stumbled “I don’t think you’re worthless”. For the first time, his parents were torn with letting him get away with whatever came out of his mouth and outrage that their child would say something so “terrible”.

As they drove away, he glanced back at Harry, who had gone from a scared scrawny kid to a young man with a straight back and haunted eyes without him noticing. The same young man who hated the Dursley family, who had every right to hate them and yet still could not allow them to be harmed.

A boy who was too darn kind for his own good. 

Afterwards, he didn’t hear from his cousin for a long time. 

Dudley continued his schooling and went to university. There were some troubled times, for the first time his parents couldn’t afford whatever his heart desired and he was forced to pick up a job for his studies.

The value of money was something he never had to face before until it was smacked into his face with every angry customer who wanted a low-fat latte at five in the morning.

On-campus, away from his parents, he realized just how horrible and not normal his childhood was. The things that came out fo their mouths weren’t funny or true. The sneers at anyone that was slightly different, the harsh punishments they demanded, the need to be normal and right, wasn’t how the world was.

The way his dad and mom behaved wasn’t supposed to make the house feel suffocating even when they let him do whatever he wanted. But he still loved them, because at the end of it all, they were his parents and they loved him. 

Dudley fumbled in his adult life. He had expectations that were more fantasy than reality. His so-called friends spent more time in and out of jail then he thought possible. He had no idea what he wanted in life, other then what he knew such as have everything handed to him and the world scoffed or laughed at him.

Dudley was only twenty and he was falling apart unused to have mommy or daddy pick up the pieces for him. This was something he needed to do on his own. He found he had no idea how.

It was his godawful job that he met Tiffiny. She first came into his life with a bright smile, and cheerful spring in her step. She was a year younger then he and the cafe manager had wanted Dudley to train her.  

Tiffiny isn’t a stunning beauty but she was pretty when you took the time to give her more than a passing glance. She was attractive in a comfortable way, one that could make a man’s heart melt when she smiled up at him. Motherly too, with just enough devil-may-care mindset that made her interesting and rebellious but never cruel. 

She wore shirts with cartoons, ripped jeans, dangling earrings and pretty dresses. She knew all the old Star Wars movies line by line, adored superheroes and wasn’t interested in dating but wasn’t put off by it either. 

Once upon a time, Dudley would have called her a loser or a prude but that was when he was young and foolish.  

Dudley, now as an adult who understood things better, fell in love with her instead. Luckily for him, she felt the same way. 

After two years of dating- with his mother insisting that it was too long for her to be serious about him.- they got married. Around that same time, Dudley completed his studies and became an accountant. He chose this career after learning he was good at math when he put his mind to it and didn’t mind spending days calculating budgets. 

Dudley did his parent's taxes and ran their finances for them as well.  He made a horrible discovery. The reason his parents were able to give him everything he ever wanted as a child was because those extra funds came from Potter family wealth. 

His family lived a comfortable life on Harry’s money when he was a child. And yet, Harry was barely financially taken care of. It made him sick to think about. but he was glad his cousin cut them off the moment he turned eighteen. 

He closed the old documents and tried not to think about it again.

Tiffiny made more money than he as an eye doctor much to his father’s horror but she loved every second of it and he couldn’t find it in himself to care. So what if his wife was amazing at what she did and was rewarded with the appropriate paycheck? That’s how it should be. 

His parents had some problems with his marriage but it never got in the way of their love and visits. They were part of his life and he adored them all the same. Then Tiffiny gave him his first child, a sweet little girl named Daisy.

Dudley had heard his mother say over and over again throughout his life that he was the greatest thing to happen to her but he never really understood until Daisy opened her eyes for the first time. 

His princess was a scrapper. Smart and sociable in ways her parents weren’t. Daisy luckily inherited most of her looks from her mum, sharing only his hair color and smile. Dudley thought she was the most adorable thing to ever grace the earth. 

Petunia Dursley wholehearted agreed. She spoiled her grandaughter something rotten, more so then Dudley which was a horrifying thought to Tiffiny.(his mom and wife were often butting heads about the proper way to be a mother and wife. Tiffiny did not like her advice on what a proper wife/mother should be)

 But his daughter loved her grandmother so much, and always, always wanted to make her proud. She often made them her grandparent's gifts or chatted with them on the phone every evening if she could. Daisy was beside herself when Tiffiny got pregnant again with a boy.

This child he named Josh after Tiffiny’s late father. Things were going great for a while, he had a loving family, a respectable job and people liked the new him. 

Then one day, Daisy made her drawing that she created for her grandmother flout at the age of eight when she was being babysat by the woman. Dudley had arrived to his little angle sobbing in terror while his mother screeched things he hadn’t hear in years. Things that she used to scream at Harry.

His father refused to have Daisy anywhere near Josh, scaring the little girl with threats that he used on Harry. The baby in his arms crying for his sister, even though he too had no idea what was happening.

The second he learned his mother had attempted to “break the freak” out of Daisy, he had to do something he never thought he would. He cut his parents out of his life.  Prohibited them from ever coming near his children again. 

Tiffiny didn’t know about magic but she did know enough to swear up and down that if Veron or Petunia ever tried to lay a hand on her child again she would carve them with the kitchen knifes like a Christmas Turkey. They moved away just to make double sure the kids were far away from their grandparents. 

Dudley ignored all of their pleas and messages, not willing to bend on the matter. 

He had seen what they did to Harry, and he would not allow the same to befall onto Daisy. 

As much as he wanted to protect her, he couldn’t fix the damage they had already inflicted on his daughter.

Daisy spent weeks crying and apologizing. She didn’t know what she had done to make her beloved Grans despise her.  “What did I do Papa? What did I do? Why don’t they love me?”

It broke his heart.

More so when he looked at his sobbing little girl and thought of the boy under the stairway. Was this what he allowed to happen? How could anyone do that to a child? They were so defensive, so tiny, and they didn’t understand why someone could be so cruel.

Good Gods, why did Harry Potter ever thought they were worth saving? There was too much good in him, maybe from his father’s side. There was no way Harry learn to be kind from their side of the family.   

He sat Tiffiny down, explained everything to her that he knew about his cousin and together came to terms that their daughter was a witch. They never spoke to his parents or saw them ever again.

It broke his heart all over again, but to make sure that Daisy never felt the way Harry did, he stayed away. 

A few years later, a wizard arrived at their house to give Daisy Dursley her own letter to Hogwarts.

Professor Longbottom is a kind, soft-spoken man who did his absolute best to answer all their questions. Things he should have known because Harry went to Hogwarts but he knew next to nothing about the wizarding world. Dudley hadn’t the slightest clue of his daughter’s new world. 

He should have. Had his parents and himself not been absolute monsters. 

 Professor Longbottom came back to take them shopping for Daisy’s school supplies. 

For the first time in his life, Dudley was introduced to the world Harry Potter is a part of and disappeared into. Watching the bricks move out of the way he couldn’t help but wonder how his parents possibly thought this world could be bad. 

Everywhere he looked, magic was being used and it left him breathless in wonder. Magic, he had at a distance known was real, but to see it was nearly overwhelming. As it were, Daisy who was having the time of her life looking at everything would glance back at them as if though it helped her stay calm knowing her parents were there for this big new change in her life.

He wondered with a pang of self-hating guilt if Harry felt just as overwhelming need to have someone reassure him this new world was going to be alright. Tiffiny squeezed his hand, something she did whenever he thought back to his cousin.

She knew now what his parents had done and what he had done to other magic user in his family. Tiffiny didn’t approve but she told him that lingering with regret wouldn’t change the past. He could only one day find Harry and maybe make amends. 

Daisy left that September for her schooling. The house felt emptier without her but his little girl always wrote home. She had been put in the house of the hard workers, Hufflepuff they were called.  

While reading her letter, he wondered which house Harry was in. Every summer his things were locked away so he didn’t even know the color of his old robes. Daisy said the color told the House. 

The last thing in Daisy’s letter hurt. She was having the time of her life meeting kids that are just like me Papa! I’m normal here!

That night he held his wife just a little tighter, crying into her shoulder. People like me. A place where one could be normal. 

Tiffiny knew he was bisexual, had known long before they married but he didn’t share that knowledge with anyone. His parents made sure he never felt normal for noticing blokes and even in this day and age he couldn’t stand the idea of anyone besides his wife knowing.

 His daughter would never feel that way. She was ina world that didn’t care apparently, according to her letter. 

Had that been what Harry found? Did he know that he now lived in a world that cared little about sexuality and cared more about blood statues? Did he too, meet bigots who turn their nose up at his “muggle” upbringing?

Daisy, as a muggle-born, had a lot of idiots try to shame her for it but she was nothing if not resilient. At least she claims so, in her letters, and he thought about all the kids he tormented as a child.

His daughter now had to face idiots like her own father. It made his stomach turn and shame burn every nerve of his body.

One day, Daisy wrote about the dreamy (his baby was too young to think about boys! Even if Tiffiny found it all quite cute)  six-year perfect. A young man named Teddy Lupin, who had been an enormous help to Daisy and had made settling into Hogwarts easier.

-A shapeshifter called Metamorphmagus! He’s also Harry Potter’s godson, the Savior of the wizarding world. But I try not to make a big deal about it because Teddy doesn’t like people going all gaga over his godfather.

Dudley nearly spits out his drink, eyes widening as he re-read the same passage again and again. It took Josh’s head butt to his knee in a misguided attempt of a good morning hug that snapped him out of his shock.

“It’s been almost fifteen years,” Tiffiny said looking over the letter. “maybe it’s time to face the person you were in the past.”

He sent Harry a letter through Daisy. His daughter was downright shocked that they were actually related to the Harry Potter, and she swore she would get Teddy to pass it along. If not him then she would give it to James Sirius Potter, Harry’s oldest child and fellow first-year though he is a Gryffindor.

A few weeks later he meets up with Harry in a small pub, the entrance of the two worlds. Before his cousin could say anything he blurted out “I’m sorry for everything. I wish I could go back and change all of it. I hate who I was and I hate how my parents acted. You deserved so much better.”

Harry looked bewildered.  “You already said that in the letter”

“I need to say it for the rest of my life. I need to make up for what I’ve done” 

His cousin started at him for a moment before pulling out some paperwork. Harry’s smile is tight, uncomfortable and he looks worn out like those veterans he sometimes saw. 

He does want to be here, but he is, because Harry is one thing many people in this world aren’t. He’s too kind.  “Let’s talk about something else. You want me to help you find someone to be Daisy’s magical guardian in case anything happens to you and your wife right?”

Dudley swallows. He knew that Harry wouldn’t forgive him. But he is grateful none the less he’s still here, still willing to try.  “Yes. I can’t have Daisy be given to my parents if we were to die. They...you know what they are like about magic.”

Harry’s eyes turn dark  “I can never forget.”

He winces.  “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine-” Harry stops, shakes his head and starts again.  “It’s in the past. Let’s leave it there yeah?”

Leave it that they do.  They stay in contact- Harry agreed to be the temporary Magical guardian until they find someone- and though they aren’t friends he can at least say he made amends with his cousin. 

Two years later, Dudley has to do one of the hardest things is ever had to do. He’ has to say goodbye to Tiffiny. Has to hold his children while they lower her into the ground, a victim of an unknown infection in her lungs that they caught on too late and wonders what in the world is he going to do know.

Josh is but six, and Daisy is only thirteen. They need their mother.  He needs their mother. But she’s never coming back. 

Live goes on but he keeps thinking she’s just around the corner. Wakes up in the mornings expecting her to be at his side. 

Without Tiffiny Dursley he feels like he’s falling apart, and then to make matters worse, Josh makes his oatmeal exploded three weeks after her funeral. His son is a wizard. Dudley puts his head into his hands and he screams. 

Daisy jumps into the fireplace with tears in her eyes, holding her baby brother and her mind filled with the last time she spoke to her grandparents. Dudley is left feeling like they were moving onto a world he could never reach and sits miserably sobbing into his hands. 

Harry shows up the next day, with a kind understanding eyes and offers to let him stay with his family. 

“I know what it’s like to lose someone important.” He says and Dudley thinks of the stories that Daisy has about the Boy-Who-Lived and the Battle of Hogwarts. It’s all so unfair. Why does he have to suffer so much? How many did Harry see die and why is it that it only took one person for Dudley to break? “Come on Big D, I’ll help.”

 He’s too kind. Much too kind. Dudley doesn’t deserve any of that kindness. 

The Potters are lovely.  They help put himself back together, help him get out of bed and be there for his children. Tiffiny would have had his head if she could have. The thought doesn’t hurt as much as it did when her death was still fresh.

Magic is part of his life now. Will always be. With both his children having it. Sometimes he can understand why his mother was so jealous of his aunt Lily. The things magic can do, the wonder they bring. 

 Harry and Ginny have agreed to be their permanent magical guardians. He’s grateful, one less thing to worry about. A year with the Potters allows him to breathe easier. He moves out again with Daisy and Josh. A small but no longer broken family.  

Dudley is finally come to terms with his past, his present and he hopes his future will be better for his kids. 

Then his car gets hit.

As he’s sailing through the air, having been flipped from the impact he is suddenly confronted with everything all over again. He’s not going to live he knows, and he thinks that Harry will take good care of his little ones. He thinks he’ll see Tiffiny. He thinks of Daisy and Josh who lost both her parents much too quickly. He thinks of the people his kids will marry and the grandchildren he’ll never meet.  

He thinks of Josh getting his first wand in three years, of him going to Hogwarts, of  Daisy being made Head Girl, graduating and earning her Potion Mastery without him being there. 

He thinks of magic and how he still even after all this time wishes he could save Harry from his childhood.  

He thinks, magic, Daisy, magic, Josh, magic, Harry, magic, regret, magic. 

Dudley Dudley thinks all this when suddenly something in his chest feels like it squeezes and fire burst from deep within him. There is a bright light of silver sparkles whirling around him just as the roof of his car caves in. 

He wakes to find himself a year and half suddenly being smothered by his mother’s voice and arms. Sitting in a corner is a toddler with wild hair and green eyes crying.

What happened? He wonders. Where am I? 

His mother tries to put him to bed, but he's not having that. Not when he sees his father attempt to drag the other toddler into the cupboard fo bed. He thinks of Harry’s kindness and finds that while nothing is making sense he’s not going to allow it to happen. 

Dudley’s parents always let him get away with anything. Helping his cousin into his bed, so he can hold onto the baby version of him is no expectation. Petrina's lips press close together but she can’t say no to him and Harry falls asleep in his arms.  

Making sure the green-eye boy is well covered by the blankets, Dudley stares up at the ceiling and thinks. 

Magic has been apart of his life for years now. He can recognize it. But it doesn’t make sense. In that car, there were no magicals, only he.

He turns his eyes to toddler-Harry, who is clinging to him with all the might a child can. Dudley is reminded of those early nights when Daisy and Josh were born.

Turn his arms don’t quite go around his young cousin since Dudley finds himself in a toddler's body as well now, he still makes sure to tuck him closer to him and swears.

If this is real.  I’ll make sure this time, you have someone who cares about you.

[gigilalaka]

Meta Knight HCs part 4

I can fianlly write this one down! Good god, this was a long time coming. Its mostly going be about Meta’s childhood, skills and other small things. Its a sort one, but that all the time I have for now.

Edit: I’ve added a bit more since I won’t be able to make any more HCs for a while. My work has gone from 7 hours to 10-15 hours work thanks to the covid-19 virus. I work at a cleaning and house help place, where we help with laundry, house cleaning, shopping ect, for the handicaped and ill. So thanks to the virus, we become very busy with deliverys to all the places that needs all the help they can get. Hope everyone are haveing a good week/month.

-When Coldswager, Estella and Kickcrack found out about Meta’s real age of 1775,his been at the sickbay for 16 years and both Coldswager and Estella was very concerns about why Meta’s body seems to have bad reactions with a lot of the medicien that was given to him, instead of being somewhere between 3000-5000 years old as his hight, weight and body structure said, the three of them did not believe it at first. It took another 10 trys with the same end results for them to believe it. Arthur was far from happy when he got told of Meta’s true age.

-When Dragato, Nonsurat and Falspar was told that their new little bro to be was infact still a toddler/baby, they could not quiet believe it. It did not help that Meta’s body was physically 3-5 years old. Though they learned over the years that Meta was indeed bearly 2000 years old.

-Theres a high age diffrent between Meta and his brothers. Meta’s age when Kirby meets him is 50 268 years old. His big brothers age are as followed: Dragato’s is 76 279, Nonsurat’s being 65 893 and Falspar’s being 58 785.

-Meta dose not start speaking untill he is 3207 years old, simply thanks to the fact that he did not know that he had the ability to and had learned from his time at the lab that being silent is worth its weight in gold if he wanted to not get eaten or beaten to death. Though he’d would have problemly start speaking sooner had he know how his dad and brothers react to it. He almost got crushed by a hug from Estella when Dragato asked Meta who she was, and got ‘mom esta’. Safe to say she was very happy.

-Meta is smaller than most puff children his age, and along with his blindness, trust issues, truma and fear that he got turing his first 1759 years of life, it became hard for him to be with other children his age without getting in some sort of problem, trouble or misunderstanding. He also became a prime target for bullys and the like. This has been one of the many reasons why Meta is so anti-sosial, though the pain of his friends dying in the war is the biggest reason of them all.

-Meta would spend most of his time playing with Falspar becuse of said bullying and the fact that Falspar was still a child and thuse had more freetime than the rest of the familiy. Meta also played a lot with Nonsurat and Dragato when they where not busy with training or study. When Galacta became friends with Meta things got a little easier for him to make friends.

-Becuse of Meta’s poor health, the puff had to eat a special diet for the next 10 000 pluss years or so. He only got things like junk food, cakes, sweet and fancy food on either his birthday or holidays. Now as a adult he can eat whatever he wants, but he still eats healthy meals most of the time.

-The first time Meta ever got to taste something sweet was when Dragato shared some of his favoritt snacks, strawberries dipped in chocolate and baked apples with honey, and the purple puff swear to this day that fireworks was danceing in his little bros eyes when the dark blue puff got to eat them.

-Meta when he was still a child and small, ended up with two habits that would only show when he was with his family. One being that he would fall alseep on their heads, after a while and out like a light, whenever he ended up on there. None of them mind it. The other one being that he would only accept anything that had something about food from them. He had a major trusts issues when it comes to food thanks his living conditions back at the lab and him being blind did not help at all.

-Meta is a terrible cook. He can not cook something without a cookbook and someone to help him, and unless you like to eat brunt ash or some sickly grayish soup, flaming water, want your kitchen to brun to the ground or expolde it is not the best idea to ask him to make dinner.

-His is however smashing at bakeing, pastry, candy makeing and other sweet desserts as well as makeing the best tea or coffe. Had he not been warborn, he’d be famous for it around the galaxy and make tons of money. His Milk tea jam, honey salted chocolate candy, special lollipops and special mixed coffeblends are to die for.

-Meta has taught both Tiff and Tuff self defense as well as hidden knife and throwing technique a few decade after NME’s defeat, when all the other villains started to invade Popstar at Lady Like and Sir Ebrum request. Both Tiff and Tuff sees Meta as their honorary wired/cool/smart uncle.

-Meta knows how to swear in eight diffrent languages and can out swear Dark Meta Knight and Dark Galacta Knight at the same time with or without curse words with flying colours. Though the only time anyone hear him swear like that his when you have ROYALLY PISSED HIM OFF HIS ROCKER AND ASKED FOR MOTHER DEATH! He swear most of the time in his head though.

-Meta’s relationshipe with Knuckle Joe and Sirica has over the centuries gone from awkward and tense to familiy friends. Both hunters sees Meta now as their uncle and would often ask Meta about their parents and what the three star warriors would do together when not in battle. They where supriest when they learned that the old warrior had a husband that got seal away 21 203 years ago and both felt bad for the puff.

-Meta and Dark Meta as a very intreresting, distructive, annoying and bad relationshipe. The two of them have a hard time not trying to either maim, kill or get on the others nerv. Both has a burning hatred for the other, and there are very few things the two of them are willing to agree, share or help on with the other. However, the both of them are very happy to team up when their husbands decides to destroy eachother and the univers with them though. Both of them hates it when its happends.

-Meta is someone that even the best of psychiatrist would find as a struggeling nightmare to help. The old warrior has had so many trumas, mental breakdowns, seen enough shit to last a few lifetimes and more that many of them are amazed how he is still as some sanity left. Some would say that the puffs psychic is a utter mystery for their profession.

[despressolattes]

AFTERMATH | CHAPTER ELEVEN | LEGACIES

BOOK ONE—SIDE CHARACTER

AFTERMATH MASTERLIST

 < CHAPTER EIGHT < CHAPTER NINE < CHAPTER TEN

I'm straying from the show a bit so enjoy my version of legacies

---

More recap, there was a dryad that came for the knife that called Alaric out on his tragic love life. Ouch, tree lady, he so didn't need that.

A student council was created, Josie, Hope, MG, Rafael, and I are all on it. Josie represents the witches, Hope represents the tribrid, or herself, MG represents the vampires, Rafael represents the werewolves-he's the alpha now, by the way- and I represent the Original. I'm not too sure what my interests would be since literally nothing can kill me, but hey, my mother is alive, maybe I can die. Landon was sent away. It was only Rafael and I voting to keep him.

The twin's bio mom made a guest appearance at their 16th birthday party. Don't you just love it when the dead come back?

Time to be a walking reality show, not that my life hasn't already been one.

- Lilah Mikaelson

-

Hope and I were finally on speaking terms again, after our huge fight. She told me that she has come to terms with the fact that Roman "aided in the murder of her mother". I think part of that decision had to do with Landon getting sent away. She acted like she hated him, but in reality she was covering up the fact that she had feelings for the townie.

Plus, she and I were Mikaelsons. We would protect always and forever, it was our family's legacy. The aftermath of our dads' deaths was that always and forever was ours to uphold now.

"What are you going to do about your mom? Just let her stay in New Orleans while you deal with the trouble here at the school?"

I ran my hands through my disheveled hair, and nodded. I held my knees to my chest, and stared out the window. We had a nice view of the field, and I caught a glimpse of the Wickery match going on. Roman was out there, shirtless, enjoying himself being on the winning team as always, him and Rafael beasts on the field together. He looked towards our window, our eyes meeting for a second. He smiled and waved, and I sent one back before he was back paying attention to the game.

Hope sat down next to me, and leaned her head on my shoulder. I glanced down at the bracelet she had. I guess the fact that it hasn't glowed yet means Landon was safe and sound in New Orleans. Hope sent him that way, but I was assuming that he didn't actually end up there. I had no calls from Damon, Elena, or Bonnie that he had arrived to get help.

Hope showed me a picture of Seylah, his mom. I had a feeling he went to find her on his own instead.

"You should go and figure out what's going on with them," Hope told me. "She's your mom."

"We have problems here at the school," I said. "I'm not leaving you, Alaric, Roman, the twins, and literally everyone else to fend for yourselves. I'm the only one here who can't die, which means I'm the best weapon this school got. Lorelle is fine in New Orleans, Aunt Bex and Uncle Kol are there."

Hope squeezed my hand.

"I'm here," she said. "Always and forever."

-

I walked outside with a book in my hand. I had no homework and things were quiet. It was the first amount of peace I had in a while. I had my favorite playlist going, and I picked up on the last page I was on.

I got ten pages in before someone took the book from me. I looked up, taking out earbud out to see Rafael standing there with a smile, examining the book.

"The Hate U Give," he read the book's title, and nodded approvingly before handing it back to me. "It's a good one."

"You've read it?" I asked him, and he nodded.

In the time of all the craziness, Rafael and I definitely got closer. When his ex girlfriend showed up from the dead, and he went through his grieving for a second time, he and I had a heart to heart with Alaric. Alaric had let Jo go so many times, but I knew this last time was the worst because he had to watch his daughters lose their mother.

Rafael was there whenever I needed to talk about how weird it is for me knowing Lorelle was out there. Roman was, too, but there were emotions and feelings he wouldn't understand.

He sat down next to me as I reopened my book, moving in a position so that he could also see the pages. He picked up the earbud that I took out, and wiped it first, then put it into his own ear. He also nodded approvingly with the song I was playing.

"Where's Sienna?" he asked.

Since being here, he and Rafael started calling each other by their last names. They were almost friends, but I guess more of rivals in a way. They worked well together, but loved to compete, loved to one up the other.

I pointed with my head to the field. Rafael smirked and stood up, running towards saying he had the next game. Roman saw him and smiled. They fist bumped, and Rafael waited on the sidelines until the next game started. Roman glanced over at me, and before the next game started, he ran over.

He tried to hug me, which I moved away because he was sweating.

"Oh, c'mon," he laughed, and I gave in, leaving into him. "You feeling okay today?"

"I am," I said.

He moved a piece of hair out of my face.

"Good," he said. "I'll let you get back to your reading."

He placed a quick kiss to my forehead before running back onto the field. I looked at Rafael who sent me a teasing smile, and I smiled and shook my head, redirecting my attention to my book.

I really wished that things could go back to days like this. But I was a Mikaelson, what did I expect?

CHAPTER TWELVE