#'ve been really appreciative of ma lately n i guess it gave me a kick to write smth so here i suppose!

[spotsupstuff]

She hates it when things don't go according to her plan.

That is, at least, the lone source of annoyance she clings onto to keep up her usual facade of anger while her little brothers sit by her side, playfully arguing. Maybe she could try and get angry about their volume, the topic of the argument, the fact that Six Ear smells absolutely abysmally and Wùkōng again smells too sweetly. That damn peach boy.

She can't quite bring herself to do that, though.

Sūn Mǎ’s plan to never change her opinions on relationships has fallen on top of its head, inside a metaphorical messy ditch, while on fire for good measure. To a good point, she could admit she should've seen that one coming. She’s been around long enough to know that rarely did things stay sweetly the same.

Sweeping her eyes through the noodle shop opened after hours just for them, clinking her chopsticks against the rim of her bowl, she quietly grumbles to herself about injustices and lack of empathy on the universe’s part. What has she done? To end up with a whole other, bonus family? Who decided to punish her so? Mǎ tells herself she’ll find them and whoop their shit one day. Maybe she could bribe Red Son or Nezha to help her find the bastard.

Qí Xiǎotiān sits in front of her and gives her one of his signature beaming smiles. Mǎ looks at him with a flat expression and the kid, miraculously catching the display just thanks to the eye holes in her mask, giggles as if she rather made a silly face than one typically promising bloodshed. She adores his laughter. He's like a son to her. So she wishes him enjoyment of his food and he says thank you with a little excited bounce to his whole person and she, bitterly and sourly, considers killing for him again. Damnit, she’d do unspeakable things for this kid.

And she’s righteously mad about that, thank you very much! Because that was never in her plan.

To her brother’s credit, it seems to have been very much so in Wùkōng’s plan, considering how he aborts the argument he had been leading with Six Ear for the mortal. His attention nyooms away from his murderous piece of shit spiritual half in favor of slapping itself to xiǎo Qí like a slice of cheese. Six Ear crosses his arms and sulks like a toddler. Wùkōng asks Xiǎotiān what he’s having, because he hasn't decided yet and she can already tell he will get the same thing as the kid. The casualness is disgusting. She feels warm. Horrid.

The little dragon pulls up next, equipped with some broth and spoon, holding the latter like her sword as she glares down at Six Ear with reasonable heat given the absolute calmness of the atmosphere. Mǎ proudly notes to herself that her teachings of how to hold a sword right are paying off. Xiǎojiāo looks like she’d manage to stab Six through with that innocently looking utensil if she really put her heart into it.

Next time they’ll have a training session, she might take the kid to the movies as a reward both for doing so well in her training and for keeping Mǎ’s honor running strong by that unasked for eye contact related violence against Six Ear. Mǎ tells her as much, leaning over, unable to keep the smirk off her face and seeping into her voice. Six Ear sulks harder as if it was a sport and he was intending to win at it. Xiǎojiāo cheers and does a little fistpump, immediately asking if Xiǎotiān and Red Son and the little girl they rescued from the White Bone Spirit year ago can come too. Mǎ nods and shrugs at the same time, leaving it clear that it’s the kids’ choice.

With the way Xiǎojiāo turns to her best friend and starts plotting, Mǎ figures it will be more of Xiǎojiāo and Xiǎotiān’s choice. Leave it to them to shove Red Son into any activity outside of his room ever. She’s proud and glad for that. Rākṣasi will be too.

She leans back next, leveling Six Ear with a raised eyebrow before socking him in the shoulder, not bothering to hold back her strength. After all, even though he's not made of stone like their brother, the fiend could probably take a hit from a bulldozer driving at unnatural speeds. He rolls his eyes and waves her off, barely shaken. Then his expression untangles into something lighter as he sighs and sits up better, probably finally accepting his fate as the punching bag all over again. He's been needing to reaccept those terms a lot. Because he's stupid and an idiot. Concludes Mǎ which means that it is correct.

Six Ear proceeds to pull on his shirt, probably bothered by the lack of a cloak over his shoulders, his exposed back. She asks him ‘what’s the matter with you, dumbass’ anyway. Because she guesses they are better now. They’re okay. First time in forever, she doesn't mind it or doesn't jump when his tail curls around her leg, seeking reassurance. Looking for a rock to lean on in her that she can muster herself to be- as the older sister that she is.

And first time in an even longer forever, he hesitates only for a second before he confides in her that he's a little worried for their currently missing family members. Chef Zhū is here, yes, getting the food for them all ready. Red Son is with his parents, catching the Bull King up to the history he has missed while buried under that mountain. They still haven't gotten through everything even though it’s been like five years since the King was freed. It has been a bit since he was free to roam, she supposes nonchalantly, as if she doesn't feel the settled years in her bones herself.

No, no. The fool is openly worried for Táng and Clementine and, get this, Juéxīn of all people. Because even though they were dressed well, even though he lent his cloak for all three to hide under, he’s still concerned over them staying warm this December evening while they are out there fetching cookies. At least he isn't fretting over their safety. Mǎ is sure that those creepy little lesser yāoguài he keeps stashed in that cloak’s shadow would be enough to beat up the whole city.

She calls him stupid for worrying and then comforts him, saying that all will be alright. The wind doesn't have the presence of mind to hurt them. He tries to argue that Juéxīn is a bitch and built like a stick, a troublemaker, a moron and has open circulatory system and yāoguài with open circulatory system are prone to freezing, he allegedly knows that very well, he has “disposed” of a fair share of that kind of yāoguài in such a way and Mǎ is so used to his bloody history that she doesn't even bat an eye at that detail.

Just as Six Ear is surely about to explain in grotesque detail how an open circulation succumbs to cold and make the vibe of this table beyond repugnant, the door to the shop swings open and the three missing family members, two miscreants and an utter sweetheart, trickle in. Juéxīn is the only one wearing his cloak, the bottom part of face hidden in the hem completely.

With a dramatic- because what other kind of?- yell, Six Ear shoots up from his seat and marches over to them with purpose and a frown. All three of them only smile, Juéxīn even dares to scoff. Mǎ finds those reactions to her youngest brother perplexing beyond belief.

Her gaze lingers on them, even as Six Ear kisses Táng a greeting and pulls Clementine into a hug against his side, stroking her head, before taking the shopping bags from her and letting the now 19 year old run up to Xiǎotiān and Xiǎojiāo. 'How fast the time runs for them,' Mǎ sighs under her breath, massaging temples. She looks away when Six Ear, Táng and Juéxīn go on to unpack the sugary bounty, the shadow demon immediately starting to bicker with the spider demon. He doesn't urge her to give his cloak back at all. She still has it on even when she presses herself against Wùkōng’s side, after Six Ear exasperatedly threw his arms up and sent her away to properly warm up.

Probably brushed hands with her and found the coldness of her personally offensive. Sounds like something he'd proclaim.

Mǎ almost chokes on the broth she began sipping, startled by that train of thought. Yes, they are better now, but she has yet to get used to thinking of Six Ear positively so… so freely.

Wùkōng rubs her back as she coughs. He doesn't ask what was that about, but he does smile at her. She leans into the contact, finding it harder to school her expression into the typical scowl she wears. The comfort helps cloud her memory of her previous relationship plans, so her lonely reason for annoyance slips. 

First time in what feels like ever, she lets her guard down completely as she lets herself love the people around her plainly.

Relationships are strange and kind of disgusting things. At least so she has concluded in the book bearing the title of her own mind and opinions.

Dictionaries would tell her that a relationship is “the way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected” or “the state of being connected by blood or marriage” or “the way in which two or more people or groups regard and behave towards each other”.

She guesses that is correct. With how broad and yet specific the explanations are. With how ridiculous the meaning of the word “connection” is.

The rest of the world outside of the dictionaries has its own definitions, too. Every creature with a mind that thinks deeply upon a topic will have their own ideas regarding what a “relationship” is and what it entails.

For the former marshal Sūn Mǎ, the things vary and sometimes they leave a sour taste in her mouth.

Building the things is difficult- unless it is with objects that can’t even talk back. She’s sure that her relationship with her knife is better than with anything that dares to have lungs and a heart, because she loves to hold it close to her chest to feel safe in the streets. Unlike with people. Those deceiving things. Feeling the handle rest in her palms is more of a comfort to her than anything else. When the blade spills crimson on the sidewalk out of self-defense, a rush of adrenaline, nostalgia and joy is what fills her head.

Is that not what a good relationship is supposed to look like? Make her heart blossom?

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