#'oh I forgot [your qpps]'

[dameronswife]

tfw your cousin makes fun of your special interest of your partner and calls it an obsession (vaguely derogatory) and then Also forgets entirely that you have partners, but you're expected to keep up w all their interests and their bland ass bf....

[epickiya722]

Not an ask, but-.

I've been following you since a long time ago (in my other account). Mostly because of your JJK posts, analysis, and the fact that your blog is purple (that's my favorite color <3). Also, I think you're very cool.

Then you made an ask game of color palettes and fics. I was like "Oh, so you write fics, too?"

I made a point to check that out but. I forgot. Until recently. I was shocked to see not 5, not 10, not even 25 fanfics... BUT 310!

THAT'S A SMALL LIBRARY RIGHT THERE. You're a tryhard, frfr.

All this to say that I really admire you, and the amount of creativity you have. And the willingness to write 310 fics (with lots of them being in the 40k words or more). That's having a lot of love for what you do.

I quite literally had a conversation with my qpp about another author and you, and how we wish we could be as dedicated, haha.

You are someone we both look up to, now. And we really think your awesome.

I just wanted to let you know that <3.

Wait, no, stop!! I'm crying!! ( ╥ ᴗ ╥)💜

Oh, this really touched my heart, thank you so much!!! You and your friend look up to me?! No, I'm ugly crying, for real!

I just really like writing, be it stories or analysis posts and I like sharing them. So I'm glad to see someone enjoy them just as much as I do. Been doing it for years.

I'm rooting for you and your QPP and have fun doing whatever you choose to pursue in!

Yeah, purple is my favorite color, too! Just reblogged a color just before answering this ask. Even have a tag for it! Just look at the #purple💜💜💜 tag and you'll see the pretty shades.

[sweetmage]

A quick little unedited fic about V and Panam being QPPs in the Star ending! Originally this was supposed to be a prompt fill for the prompt "A kiss for luck" but I accidentally forgot to include the kiss for luck part and it turned into something else lol. TW for passing out, injury, referenced canonical character death Fic below the cut! 😊

V hadn't been certain he'd make it all the way to Mikoshi, let alone exit with his life intact. Yet he managed to do just that, if only barely. He left the virtual prison with the same limp body he'd entered with, this time with arms around him, dragging him back through the halls he'd escaped. The same halls that had seemed impassable the first time.

"Use your leg, V," Panam hissed beneath his weight. "Walk if you can!"

The adrenaline had been all that kept V going for the last few hours, and it had worn off some time ago. Now that the immediate danger had passed, the pain in his limbs was beginning to throb with every step. "Tryin'," he managed through a clenched jaw, feeling the skin around his mouth pull tight with the blood that had dried and flaked over his face. "Gonna need help...gettin' out."

"You will have it. Keep moving."

"Mitch, take his other side," Panam said, and together, they hauled him down the corridor towards the elevators, his boots scraping along the ground. "Fuck. You're heavy for such a skinny ass."

"Hey, my ass ain't skinny," V shot back weakly, hoping his teasing would distract from the fact that he was on the verge of passing out.

"Don't talk, save your breath," Panam ordered.

The backtracking was pure agony for both body and spirit, fallen friends in every corner, a reminder of how many sacrifices were made for him and this mission, their lives traded for his. They'd all known the stakes. They'd all volunteered. They'd all agreed to this. Yet he couldn't help but feel a sting of guilt as he was carried past their corpses on the ground, back into the light of day and the awaiting convoy.

"Load him up, get him to Hutch," Mitch said, his hands firm on V's shoulders, steadying him against Panam's battered Warhorse as she threw open the door.

"Got it." Panam nodded. "Go, get the others, we have to get out of here before we're all overrun. V, get in, come on. Up!"

"Gonna need a hand." V held out his arm. "Not doin' so well. Gonna...fall."

"Oh no you don't." She grabbed him by the elbow and pulled, lugging him up into the seat and doing up.his seatbelt for him. "After everything, you better not fucking die on me. Don't even think of it."

"Woah, hey, relax," he said, closing his eyes and trying to stay awake. "You know me. Too stubborn...to die."

She was behind the wheel now, foot on the gas as the threw the truck in reverse. "Damn straight."

Everything was a blur on their way back to camp, his head rolling side to side as she sped and swerved around rocks and bushes. "Hutch know I'm comin'?"

"Yeah. Everyone is ready."

"No slight on his skills, but I think I wanna see Vik..."

"All the way in— are you out of your mind? We do not have time. Suck it up for now, you can see him later."

"Yeah, yeah." He winced. "Can't believe it's over."

"Almost."

"No more Relic. No more...Johnny. He just...went."

"What?"

He blinked, trying to focus, but the world was falling sideways. "Oh, shit..."

"Hey, hey, don't you fucking pass out on me! V!" She took him roughly by the arm, shaking him. "V!"

—

When V woke, he was lying in a rather uncomfortable bed, the sun filtering through the thin fabric of the curtains in a warm haze. He groaned, trying to sit up.

"Easy there, boss." Mitch's face came into focus as he leaned over V, pushing him back down. "Take it slow. You're banged up."

"Where...?"

"Safehouse," Panam answered, coming into view on the other side, her arms folded. "A motel owner I know owes a few favors. He let us set up here to patch up and rest. We'll head out at sun up tomorrow."

"How long was I out?"

"A few hours. It's almost sundown, now."

"Fuck," he hissed, holding a hand to his chest. "What about—?"

"Everyone's okay," Mitch said. "Well, everyone that survived the raid. Panam called your ripperdoc and gave him a rundown of your condition. He said you'll live and he'll give you the full works when you're back in town. But he's not happy."

"Great."

V winced. "I gotta...get up."

"V," Panam said. "Stay still, for fuck's sake."

"Wanna get outta here. Need some air."

Mitch and Panam exchanged glances, before she threw her hands up in defeat. "Okay, okay. Fine. But I am helping you. Don't argue." She came around to his left side and wrapped an arm around him, helping him into a sitting position. "Careful, you might be dizzy."

"Yeah. Real fuckin' dizzy," he mumbled, leaning on her as he rose to his feet.

"Slow. Go slow. One step at a time. I am in no mood to scrape you off the pavement if you fall."

"You're all heart, P," he mumbled. "Glad...you made it out. Was worried about you."

"Me?" she asked. "I wasn't worried in the slightest. You? That is another story. I thought you were a goner for sure when we dragged you out of there."

"Yeah? Guess I got a few lives left." He hobbled out the door of the motel, letting the sunlight warm his face as he stepped outside. "Mm, fresh air."

Panam was quiet, the way she got when she was thinking too hard. V let her muse, but his expectant gaze didn't go unnoticed. "Are you still coming with us?" she asked finally, as if uncertain of the answer.

"Yeah," he said, squinting. "Sounds preem, the nomad life. Why?"

"You have your life back, you could go back to NC, to being a merc. I thought perhaps..."

"Thought wrong," he said, leaning against her shoulder, letting her take some of his weight. "Never had a family before. Feels good, damn good. Wouldn't trade it for the world, let alone for my old gig."

"Well. Okay." She smiled. "Okay."

"Stop worryin' so much, would ya?" he teased.

"I am not—"

"Yeah? That why your face is doin' that thing again, where you look like you're constipated?"

"V, you're a jackass."

"Hey, just cuz I don't want you worryin' yourself to death doesn't mean I don't appreciate it. Really."

"Of course I worry about you," she admitted. "I never had a friend like you. So I may have gotten...used to having you around. Everything wants to take you away from me and I hate it. I cannot protect you from everything, but if you're with me then I will sure as hell try. All of us will."

"You did good today," he said, tucking his face against her neck and letting his eyes close. "Don't know why you did it, but you saved my ass. Everyone did. Even..." He trailed off, swallowing hard.

"Of course you don't understand. You said yourself that you have never had a family. Well, this is what it looks like. We take care of our own. We do not let each other suffer."

"That's a hell of a family," V mumbled.

"You would do the same, would you not? You already have. Many times."

"Wouldn't even blink," he said, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Thanks. For bein' there, and...for everything. Think I'm ready to go back. Gettin' a little tired."

"Come on, then," she said, guiding him back to his bed. "You should sleep. We are leaving early in the morning. We'll take you to NC first, but there will not be much time to rest after that."

"Right," V mumbled, letting her help him back into the bed. "Think I can do that. But uh, hey..."

She paused, looking at him. "What's wrong, V?"

"Would you stay? Just for a minute. I just...it's been a weird day. Feel kinda lost, to tell you the truth."

She didn't even hesitate, settling beside him on the edge of the bed, her hand resting on his arm as he closed his eyes. Then, her weight shifted and her discarded boots hit the floor. She nudged him aside and curled up to him, head cradled between his cheek and shoulder.

"Thanks," he whispered. "I owe ya big."

"Bullshit. Just get some sleep and try not to drool on me."

V smiled, letting sleep take him. "Sure thing, P."

[4townie]

Road to 4☆TOWN

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5

“Oh, my mom is calling.” T looked at his phone. “I guess she doesn’t think I sleep.”

“That’s because you don’t.” Taeyoung reminded him.

“Hi, Mami. Do you know what time it is over here?” T said as he answered the phone.

“Oh right. I forgot about the time zones.” Catalina facepalmed. “I’m sorry, mijo. I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“Well, you know how I don’t sleep. At least that’s what Taeyoung says.” Aaron nudged him. “You had a date tonight, right?”

“Yeah, I did. In fact, Megan’s here right now.” Catalina said with a big smile. “She actually asked me to call you cuz she wanted to talk.”

“Really?” Aaron grinned. “Cool, put her on.”

“Aaron, I’m gonna go put on some toner and then get rid of you.” Taeyoung said before wandering into the bathroom.

Aaron waved absentmindedly in response. “Hey, Megan. How’s it going?”

“Aaron, I need to talk to you. And forgive me for whispering, your mom has really good ears.” Megan whispered into the phone. “I wanted to ask for your permission to marry your mother.”

Aaron paused. “You what?”

“I know it’s old fashioned, but it would be a huge change for both of you. And…I really wanna marry her.” Megan admitted quietly.

“Ohmigosh, yes! I’ve been waiting for this.” Aaron’s eyes got wide. “When are you gonna do it? Tonight? Right now?”

“I don’t have a ring yet, silly.” Megan chuckled. “I wanna buy her the prettiest ring I can afford, so I’m gonna have to save up. But I wanted to give you a heads up beforehand.”

“Awww, you’re so sweet.” He sighed. “You’re gonna make the coolest step-mom. EEP!”

“Kay, I’m ready to kick you out.” Taeyoung came back into the room. “It’s late and you need a head start on falling asleep.”

“Is that the little man?” Megan asked. “I wanna talk to him, too.”

“Yeah, yeah, he’s here.” Aaron waved Taeyoung over. “It’s Megan. She wants to speak with you.”

“The hell…?” Taeyoung furrowed his brow. “Why?”

“JUST TALK TO HER!” Aaron whisper-yelled, shoving the phone to Taeyoung’s ear.

“Oh, uh, hi Megan. Aaron said you wanted to talk to me?” Taeyoung said awkwardly.

“Little man! Awesome to hear your voice.” Megan greeted him. “I was calling to ask you both for your permission to propose to Catalina. I know you’re pretty close and I wanted to include you.”

Taeyoung was quiet as he noticed the strange feeling in his chest. “Thanks for including me, Megan. I appreciate that.” He cleared his throat. “A-Anyway, you guys make a really cute couple, so you have my blessing.”

“Yes!” Megan cheered. “Oh, you guys are the best.”

“Well, if that’s all—”

“Wait, don’t hang up.” Megan ran around the apartment in search of Catalina. “I’m gonna pass the phone back to Catalina. I’m sure she wants to talk to you.”

“Right, right…” Taeyoung sat on his bed beside Aaron. “My best friend’s mom and my best friend’s mom’s girlfriend wanna talk to me.” He sighed and rested his head on Aaron’s shoulder.

Aaron looked at him. “You okay, Tae-Tae? Something you wanna talk about?”

“What? No, of course not.” Taeyoung jumped back up. “In fact, I can’t talk to you right now. Your mom’s on the phone.” He walked away awkwardly. “Hey, Catalina…”

———

I’m back! Thank you all so much for your patience🫶🏾 A month ago today, I lost someone very important to me, but after taking time just to focus on celebrating her life and visiting my qpp to unwind, I am finally ready to resume the story. Hope you’re all as excited as I am😁

[dsmpkincalls]

Ok uh. I haven't done anything like this before but I'm super lonely rn so. Hey, I'm cRanboo, looking for my /qpp Tubbo and Tommy. We were really close, and we all lived in a little 4 room house far, far out away from the rest of the smp. Techno and Phil visited us often, and they were basically my family.

Even if your timeliness doesn't match up with mine, please interact, I really do miss you guys. Even if it's just in a platonic way, I really want to talk to ya.

Anyone else is also allowed to respond, Phil and Techno especially. Though, I'd definitely act alot more carefully around Wilbur and Dream, not super great memories there.

Im 16, 17 in a few months, so if you are Tommy or Tubbo who'd like to be /qpr then I'd prefer you'd be in a 15-18 age range. Otherwise, idm.

Thank you. -Ran/♟️

"Oh! I forgot to mention, to contact me, just like the post or dm me at @casually-undead"

[ko-comms]

ALL THE ASKS FOR TH ASK GAME ILYSM

OH FUCK OKAY ILYSM TOO!!!

Sun: what’s something that’s an everyday part of your life that reminds you of how beautiful the world is?

My partners/qpps/friends..

Moon: Give yourself a genuine compliment. right now.

Uhh my eyes are pretty ig??

Stars: Something in your room that makes you smile :)

A plushie my partner got me.. I literally can't sleep without it LMAO

Mercury: Describe happiness using each of the five senses

Genuinely forgot the five senses for a sec but smell is candles, touch is fluffy things, sight is messages from those I love/am close to, taste is baked goods, and hearing is music!

Venus: What’s a song that always makes you dance, even if just in your head?

Tbh any sleeping with sirens songs

Earth: Something that always reminds you of a loved one?

Stuffed animals.. bc they always get me a lot and I'm shown a lot if they're not in person..

Mars: Something you did well today!!

Mimi did good drawing.. I draw so many skulls bro LMAO

Jupiter: What’s the first thing you think of when you see the word ‘pretty?’

My partners/qpps

Saturn: Name 5 very cute animals!

Sugar Gliders, Chinchillas, Black Footed Cat, Ducks, Fennec Foxes (pov I own a chinchilla and wanted a sugar glider but didn't have enough room :cc)

Neptune: How do you prepare your comfort food?

I mean lemon bars so like the steps for that ig LMAO OR RICE and I just slap that shit in the microwave and put seasonings on it bc it's the mircowave kind. Also french toast/waffles/pancakes

Pluto: Name three things you’re proud of yourself for doing across these last few months!

Getting back on healthy eating habbits!! Pulling through my anorexia slowly

[appreciatingtokrev]

i guess with age gaps friendships, it's better for both parties just to tell each other their age before the friendship properly start to develop because i support they got like a mini t&c given to them beforehand. that's understandable and fair but i feel like some ppl do that to tell if the other party will be a clingy friend or not. that's true and the cases where they keep in contact with everyone else but deliberately just do it to you is a real shitty realisation to acknowledge.

i think in those cases like that, the parties may find each other attractive too hence why they dive into a relationship so quickly or they just gel really well together i dk but i feel like it's a factor for some. she kept telling my family i have a surprise for z so when i came back, i thought she was joking. i would say 99% of ppl (including me) couldn't do that lol. it did worked for her, she's having her first child in May.

also, i saw your cats in mediterranean post, i went turkey last year and they were everywhere! i went to a McDondalds over there and a few kittens came into the sitting area outside but everyone was chill lmao. if i ever come off on anon, i'll prob just call you koko because i find that the easiest name to remember. ah i did recognise them including the gen one but not all of them. do you play gi?

ah some ppl are very laidback towards their names but it's interesting how much names play a role in someone personal/cultural identity. mine used to belong to a very specific group when i was born. also, finding out meaning of names is very fun. i suppose all this links back to psychology (?) to some extend.

agreed. that’s also one of the reasons i’m pretty open abt my age on here lol. the friend i gave as example has been aware the whole time too so

hm yeah understandable. yeah exactly, if you know everyone else is being ghosted by the person too then you know it’s not personal and stuff. but being the only person to be ignored really sucks

ngl i thought abt me & my relationships more bc i was trying to understand why you’d date/marry someone so soon and uhh. tbh. my qpp and i took a year and a half to label us as in a queerplatonic relationship (basically platonic partners. if things go well, platonic life partners :3 i would certainly marry him for tax benefits) but we clicked immediately so i’m starting to understand. a few weeks would def not be enough for such a big commitment like marriage but we p much were best friends like two weeks in and we only saw each other for 2 hours a week so... just immediately clicking and thus starting to date so soon actually makes kinda sense.

oh my god help this completely threw me for a loop first adhjdhf me & my friends are all so school focused i forgot that people my age and a few years above start having kids. omg. okay but congrats to her!! also very understandable i would’ve thought it’s a joke first too... like. a few weeks to get married is VERY unusual here lol

ohh omg life goals tbh. i love cats man i wish they’d swarm like flies here too adhjgdh ig it’s mostly a problem with stray cats tho :/ but it does sound like a nice experience lol

koko works fine hehe :3 yep, i’ve been playing genshin for over two years now! 26.1.2021 hehe. been slacking since last summer but during the first one and a half years i actually played it almost every day and i even picked up honkai tho i play that a lot less regularily. and i’m excited for honkai star rail!! which is gonna be released in just four days <3

oh oh very true yeah. i’m trans so i’m just not on the best terms with my deadname but i don’t care abt it that much tbh and i can’t decide on a new name so i just give people the option to do that lol. ngl i think the meanings of last names is more interesting... idk it has to do with your inheritage n that’s indefinitely more interesting to me than your parent’s naming choices but it is fun to talk abt name meanings! non-last name meanings definitely are linked to psyghology, especially if you choose them based on meaning yup. funfact my mom should have been named after ‘love’ but her parents accidentally shifted a line down when reading their book of names so now her name means something along the lines of ‘the one with an injured foot/leg’ which.... is not exactly a nice meaning lol but ppl don’t know abt it anyway plus it’s a pretty name so it doesn’t really matter. but it’s a fun little fact i think haha

[tofu-bento-box]

curse of strahd run by a DM that likes the idea of the plot and very little of the sourcebook let’s gooooo

ireena’s bi

we have Countess Strahda instead of strahd. she’s a lesbian who fell into the evil side of gaslight gatekeep girlboss

uhhhhhh can’t talk much about sergei and tatyana cause the lore has drastically changed

i looked away from ezmerelda for too long and now she’s a social justice druid? queen shit but girl what?

victor vallakovich. what to say about him. 5’2, emo kid haircut despite being like 27, trans guy who created an “instant top surgery” spell called the Titripper (and has way more top surgery scars than usual as a result), only bad at magic because he’s dyslexic, probably a wild magic/shadow sorcerer who just hasn’t realized the books are harming rather than helping

the brides all got their own backstories outside of strahda because we respect women having their own narrative. unfortunately i forgot to actually decide what the current relationships are so god only knows their identities

we’re getting off-topic

the Abbot is some form of nb but doesn’t have a design yet so idrk

lady wachter has an Understanding with strahda and may have killed her husband i have no idea. she’ll tell me when she’s ready

OH our female bard got seduced by strahda and it went exactly as well as you’re expecting

i kicked van richten out for being a racist fuck and his replacement is a 217-year-old half-drow named nyro, who is going to end up in some undefinable qpp with the 650-year-old elf PC

we have a he/they barbarian who is both the smartest and most emotionally intelligent party member. everyone clap for leif

mt. ghakis is solely being referred to as Mount Gay Kiss cause i couldn’t figure out how to say it

ismark. straight man, but also a werewolf now, so i think he’s a pretty damn strong trans ally lmfao

anyway i accidentally bowled my whole party over with ireena’s own personal hell last session (pov your girlfriend sleeps with your new friend to keep her busy while your gf’s stank-ass butler kidnaps your brother and you find out about this because your friend comes and confesses this to you while sobbing). shoutout to victor who heard that whole confession with zero context and has been pantsless for about a third of the time he’s known the party

In honor of pride month I want to hear about how queer you made Barovia please and thank you.

For my game:

Strahd is an obvious bisexual king.

Rahadin is asexual, but not in like, an ace kind of way. Like in a single-celled organism kind of way.

Ireena is aroace! A decision partly inspired by a certain pool of water (iykyk), and also because she’s a little bit my self-insert. A PC hit on her in like session four and was immediately told, “Do not ever speak to me that way again.” She’s iconic and I adore her.

IZMARK. IZ. GAY. And madly in love with the druid. Unfortunately Izmark does not know he is gay. He believes it is very normal to lovingly stare into your homie's eyes and look down at his lips and imagine what it would be like to kiss him. And it is very normal to comment on how attractive your homie is, cause that's just what bros do.

Vollenta is a beautiful lesbian who refuses to let the fact that she is married to Strahd change the fact that she is a lesbian and nobody will tell her or her pile of bodies otherwise.

Ludmilla is on the ace spectrum. I mean, come on. She's with the guy for power and grant money. She says she loves him, and they're definitely intimate, but she's the kind of girly to take notes before during and after, you know?

Escher. What even needs to be said about Escher. He's Ravenloft's resident twink and proud of it. He's a little lonely and can't stop thinking about the boy he was in love with when he was young, who is now old and grizzled from age, while Escher himself remains the same age he was when he betrayed his lover and chose Strahd instead, but like... he's also pretty and immortal, so who cares?

(Escher Bonus Content: Two moms! They loved him very much and were upsettingly supportive of his decision to become Strahd's newest consort)

Anastrasya: idk she's dead pre-campaign in mine so if you came here looking for commentary on her you will not get it.

Ezmerelda is a trans lesbian! She's gorgeous and I adore her. She's just so confident that she can kill Strahd on her own and I think she's right for that. I knew I wanted her to be a love interest for one of my PCs, and it just so happens that the player in question has a type.

Danika is also bi, and she's very happily married to her wonderful little husband. This hasn't come up in the campaign at all it's just something I know to be true in my heart.

The Abbot: Gender! Fluid! Call them whatever you want. He/him when you want to play on ideas of masculinity in religious circles, they/them when you want to make them seem undefinable, she/her when you want your PCs to reflect on how much mom trauma they all have :)

Sergei is straight but that man loves the queer community so much and he deserves an honorable mention.

Arrigal is gay and very pissed that the party keeps knocking on his wagon door at 3am. His ex-husband/current boyfriend has been coerced into co-parenting a child with the cleric.

There's definitely others but these are my versions of the little guys. I am so interested to hear other people's takes on them.

[lgbtqpixelart]

some bi galarian ponytas ^^

[clanoffelidae]

Hi! I just saw your "I just got my first pride shirt" post and (as the owner of the first one of those ever because my QPP designed it for me) I have to say AWESOME CHOICE. You have excellent taste. I'm messaging you because it looks like the purple is sparkly? Is that the case or is it just the photo? If it is, I have to ask where you got it from because my QPP never put it up for sale anywhere that had that option and he'd like to know if someone is stealing his art (obviously not you)

OH MY FUCKING GOD I STARTED WRITING A REPLY TO THIS THEN SAVED IT IN MY DRAFTS BC I HAD TO GO TO WORK AND THEN PROMPTLY FORGOT FOR LITERAL MONTHS I AM SO SORRY

But to finally answer your question no its not glitter!! It’s just the way the ink bound to the shirt, just white flecks from the purple not binding entirely I think. :p Like when printed designs start peeling up a little bit? Just what happens with mass-produced content I think, lol.

But no not glitter, I got it from Markaleb on redbubble which I really hope is your QPP! I’m thrilled he designed it, I love it immensely. <3

Again holy fuck I am so sorry I forgot about this. But hopefully no one was stealing his art and it all worked out anyway!!!

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

sorry this is such an annoying ask. i get rsd pretty bad (asd/adhd) even tho i like to think i dont actually get rsd. what i do is i avoid social situations completely, so i don't experience it as much. but lately ive rreally really really wanted to write again.

so i followed more spn blogs and interacted more... but simple interaction drives the rsd feelings WAY up, let alone sharing stuff ive written. like i feel crazy and really juvenile but basically any fandom interactions just make me feel awful.

do you ever feel like that? what do you do?

hello, dear, i'm sorry you're having to deal with all these struggles and painful feelings.

first of all, i think we need to start with a little radical acceptance. what you like to think doesn't help you. you have rsd and social anxiety, and you can't do anything to improve those problems until you've accepted the fact that they're real problems you have. you need to take a brutal look at yourself as you really are right now and say, okay, this is where i'm starting from.

next, yes, i have dealt with/do deal with rsd, and i know it sucks. my qpp of 15 years and i both have adhd and can set off each other's rsd, so i know what it's like from both sides.

this is the most important thing: just because you feel an emotion, even if it's an intense, overwhelming emotion, that doesn't mean that feeling is an accurate reflection of reality.

a lot of the time, your perception of a social situation is actually completely different from what the other person intended for you to perceive. they said something and meant one thing by it, and you heard it and interpreted the total opposite. i know that can be really hard to believe in the moment, but trust me; my qpp and i have had to work through several awful fights, and in the end it was usually a misunderstanding between what one of us meant and the other understood.

so when someone says or does something that feels hurtful, you've GOT to give them the benefit of the doubt. you have to say to yourself, maybe they're really tired, maybe they're really stressed out because of a personal problem, maybe they've had a shitty day and they're feeling grumpy, maybe they just completely forgot and it's not any deeper than that.

it's also super important to remind yourself that a most of the time, the way a person behaves towards you is about THEM, not about you. like, if you're polite to a polite person, they will probably be polite back, but if you're polite to a rude person, they're probably going to be rude back, right? their attitude is their problem, not yours. you can't 'nice' a rude person out of being a rude person.

on a smaller scale, this is important to remember because sometimes the people you're interacting with socially have bad moods and they have nothing to do with you. it's so easy to think "oh no they're mad at me, i've annoyed them, they hate me, i'm awful, i can't ever talk to them again" but you've gotta stop those thoughts and remind yourself that you're only getting the tip of the iceberg of this person, and you don't know what's going on in the rest of their life.

that person who didn't respond to your message probably didn't think "ugh this person is so annoying, i hate them." they probably thought "aw that's nice that someone sent me a message. i'll respond when i feel up to talking/when i have time." and then something else came up and they forgot.

maybe it sucks that they forgot to reply, but it wasn't something malicious, it wasn't because they hate you. everybody forgets to reply sometimes.

or maybe they're actually going through something horrible, like maybe one of their parents is in the hospital, or maybe they have an abusive spouse, or maybe they're working three jobs trying to pay rent. you have no idea, so it's for the best to allow for these possibilities.

and while i totally understand avoiding social situations, i think that avoiding them altogether probably doesn't help either, hon. because you get so sensitized to the slightest negative interaction, and you get accustomed to running away from that slight negative interaction, that it gets damn near impossible to grow and learn how to cope. i know it's scary and hard, but sometimes you have to slowly expose yourself to difficult things so you can figure out how to handle them.

i have a small rsd tag (and a social anxiety tag), and a quick google showed that there's a bunch of articles on rsd, such as this one, and it looks like there are a bunch of youtube videos about it too. i'd suggest you also look into things like dbt distress tolerance skills.

i've posted my writing, so i understand that terrified feeling. writing is hard, and posting it for others to read feels incredibly vulnerable. but it's a good thing to do, and i'm proud of you for working towards doing that. if you'd like any advice in that realm, always remember this: no writing is ever wasted.

you know how artists need to draw every day for years to draw beautifully? writers need to write regularly for years to write beautifully. it's not just a talent, it's a learned skill, and you learn by doing. the only reason that i can write a beautiful story today is because i've written hundreds of thousands of words for fifteen years, and honestly? most of it wasn't great. definitely not in the beginning. but if you want to write well, you have to write terribly at first. it's an integral part of the process, so please don't give up if you feel like your stories are shitty. always keep writing.

i hope that helps a little bit, sweetie. i know the path ahead seems daunting, but everything in life is about practice. just practice getting a tiny bit better, and then a tiny bit more. if you keep practicing, you will make progress, i promise. take care.

[chronically-enthusiastic]

Oooh yes! I forgot you posted this: thanks @covenworm for the reminder!! (I deleted the reblog so it doesnt become a super long chain)

Forest green because FORESTSSS

Errrmm.... The gurnsey literary potato peel pie society, lotr, annnddd how to train your dragon

Favourite books is too long to put here, I might make a post dedicated to the book situation....

Autumn because ITS SENSORY HEAVEN!!! the perfect temperature, light intensity, colours!!!!!

Fantasy because DRAGONS AND MAGIC AND ELVES WITH POINTY EARS!!!

Dark academia clothes allll the way!!

Indie rock?

Platypuses are very cool!!!!

Taylor swift, OMAM, oh wonder, the national etc.

Hostages by the howl and the hum, lemonworld by the national, seven by taylor swift

Good omens!!!!!! Wooden overcoats and the amelia project. Merlin!! Oh and ofc lotr!!

I play the violin, i read, i listen to podcasts, i learn things! And i guess sewing? Maybe? (Embroidery but we dont mention that because i still have not finished @anomnipie 's birthday present...... It has been more than an acceptable amount of months..... *grimaces*)

I give gifts, words of affirmation, and quality time.

I receive words of affirmation, physical affection (but only from certain people.... I'd hug all the picrewcule though!!!)

INTROVERT!!! put me with people and i need a day to recover......... /gen

Night because im less tired at night.... And night tired is better than morning tired.

COUNTRYSIDEE!!!! its quiet and pretty and cities are horrendous for me.......

Just before the sun rises and its quiet and calm...

I guess im a christian? But Im not a fan of organised religion and im having serious issues with calling myself a christian bc of what churches are saying ab lgbtq stuff....... And other things too but mostly that....

A found family of friends who I live with and share pets and do life together. Or a qpp..... The queerplatonic yearning has infected me too....

^ but in a cottage in the countryside and learning all day long.

Errm.... Maybe a Scandinavian country?

When ivy and trees and grass have overtaken a ruined building.

Forests!!!

I would probably beeee ivy? Maybe? Or a stream...

Rain!!! Heavy rain that soaks you in an instant!!

The fact that i might be lonely in life and not be able to take care of myself effectively........

PhDs in linguistics or psychology!!!

This was very fun, thanks char! What about you?

hihi guys it’s Char, I did a get to know you post a while ago but it got very big so I would imagine I’d a little overwhelming to do, but I don’t know some of you as well as I’d like to/gen so I thought I’d put the questions here just for the picrewcule to do! (so the post doesn’t get overwhelming to do) I know some of you have already done this so feel free to not do it or do it again it’s up to you! i thought this way it could be a way for all of bud to get to know everyone a bit more, but just for the picrewcule

but of course no pressure, I’d you don’t want to do this that’s absolutely okay!

- Favorurite colour and why:

- Comfort Movies:

- Fav Books:

- Fav season and why?

- Fav genre (and why?):

- Fav clothes style:

- Fav music genres:

Fav animals:

- Fav musicians:

- Fav song(s):

- Fav fandoms:

- Hobbies:

- Care language you give:

- Care language you receive:

- Introvert/extrovert/ambivert?

- Morning/night (and why?):

- City/country/suburbs (and why?):

- Fav time of day and why?

- Do you have any religious beliefs (don’t have to answer if not comfortable):

- What does your ideal family look like?

- Dream future:

- Dream place to visit:

- Fav type of nature:

- Fav biome in nature (e.g tundra, desert, forest etc):

- I’d you could be another thing on earth what would it be?

- Fav type of weather:

- Do you have any fears (serious or otherwise):

- Dream job:

[astrangeghost]

helo my friend astrid i want to hear your blocky hcs . this is a job interview /lh /silly /nf

EDRTFGHJ oh god oh fuck(shuffles notecards) (sweating bullets)oh god.fuck oh(silly) - Bisexual + idk what kinda gender is going on there. but its fucked up and i love it - (she/her), (he/him) pronouns - romantically dating Woody and in a qpp with Pen and Eraser - hasnt fallen down a flight of stairs yet. somebodys gonna push her down a flight of stairs one day and its gonna be insane - favorite ice cream flavor is chocolate - when he gets medicine he always goes for grape flavor - i think he should be fixated on sth. just a bit. for fun. gender envy from rouge - doesn't pay taxes <3 - had a deviantart account for like a day and then she forgot about it - probablyyy liiikeeee one or two phobias but theyre really specific and havent come up in her life yet sooo <3 - i bet once she got put in a play, against her will, as like a bg character and like hated every second of it - allergic to something. he wont tell you what tho

[soysaucevictim]

“aching, shaking, breaking (like humans do)”

Summary: Remus thinks Hypnos has abandoned him for good (metaphorically speaking), Patton is there to help. (Sanders Sides, Gym Rat AU. One-shot. Ao3 link.)

Genres: Slice of Life, Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic

Characters: Patton and Remus centric. Logan, Virgil, and Roman mentioned.

Relationships: Intruality (platonic), Logicality (platonic), Background Intrulogical (platonic/ambiguous), Background Dukexiety (romantic/QPP), Background Moxiety (paternal/platonic)

Warnings: Remus angst, extreme insomnia, (unintentional) self-injury, medications, mental health issues, grim imagery, Remus Has Intrusive Thoughts, Remus Is A Mess, Patton Is A Good Friend, Interfaith Friendships, Implied (Extended) Family Problems

-

Patton was pedaling on one of the exercise bikes, which was one of his favorite activities to do at the gym. Relatively low impact and he usually took a “something is better than nothing” approach to his routines nowadays. Just appreciating the people watching and socializing with his workout famILY.

That was odd.

Remus hadn’t been to the gym for the whole week. Even when the kiddo overdid it – usually he’s not out of commission this long for it. Unless-

Something hit him in the gut when he realized that. He stopped on his bike and immediately buzzed his number.

Ring.

Ring.

Nothing.

He could shoot him a text, but it was just not settling right with him. Logan had been doing one of his HIIT circuits on the bike next to him. He took a deep breath, gently tapping Logan’s shoulder. Despite Logan’s concentration, he desisted immediately, turning off his music to respond, “What is it?”

“Have you seen a certain Pottymouth at your work recently?”

Logan paused, with a look of concerned realization, “Come to think of it, no. No, I haven’t. Well, he was getting particularly erratic and called in sick… 3 days ago.”

“I think I should go check in on him. My Other Son’s been swamped with work lately, sooo…”

If Logan was perfectly honest, it was often confusing when Patton referred to half their crew as his son, “Other son? Did you mean Virgil?”

Patton nodded.

“Probably prudent. Unfortunately, no one can stand in for me at the firm tonight. And. You’re better at the… emotions stuff.”

“I appreciate the vote of confidence! Hopefully I’m just worried for nothing.”

Patton rose up from his bike and was about to leave with his things. Logan smiled faintly, “Hey, if you would, could you tell me how he’s doing when you find out?”

Patton smiled back, a little forced if he was honest, “I’ll make sure to have him tell you that himself!”

-

It wasn’t a very far trip across the city to get to Remus’s apartment complex from the gym.

Once Patton parked his car and took another deep breath, he stepped out toward it.

After getting buzzed in and jogging up a couple flights of stairs, thanking his stars for basic training, he was at the door in a jiffy.

Patton wasn’t in the business, but he was reminded of the time Remus was raising heck to get Unit 404 from this building. He remembered seeing Logan trying desperately not to laugh when he heard about it.

He knew to knock to the phrase “Shave and a Haircut”, to alert Remus. He drummed out a few calls, waiting for Remus to make a sound on the other side, hoping he would.

It was a thing in their group, ever since they all watched “Roger Rabbit” together for a movie night, years ago.

Once. Twice. Thrice…

Patton heard the sound of chaotic crashing noises and an off-script, but still in the right cadence, “Fuck OFF!”

“Remus!? Kiddo, it’s me. I wanted to check on you!”

He heard some stumbling noises and a hoarse, “P-padre?”

“Can I come in?”

There was a dramatically loud sigh before the door was unlatched, unlocked, and open.

“Thanks- oh.”

Patton wasn’t exactly sure what he was expecting, but Remus looked even more harried than he usually was. The darkness around his eyes even more pronounced, his face was so drained. His makeup smudged, tear-streaked, and hanging on for dear life. His gaze wild and jumpy. Remus didn’t do much more than stand in the living room, staring at Patton once he entered.

Patton saw that Remus had knocked over one of his glass cabinets. He noticed Remus looked pretty scratched up and was bleeding in places, mostly his hands and knuckles.

Patton furrowed his brow, asking mostly to avoid presumptions, “How are you feeling?”

Remus sounded breathless too, “What does it fucking… look like!?”

Patton paused and looked around some more, there was a lot of trash strewn about the floor. Granted there usually was, Remus would just call it “organized chaos”. But Patton did note that there was an alarming number of energy drink cans piled around a hopelessly full trash bin. Monsters, NOS, Red Bulls, 5 Hours, yerba mate, the works.

Patton slumped a little bit in worry, “Not exactly peachy keen, I take it?”

Patton had a hunch that Remus was screaming not that long ago, based on just how raw his voice sounded, “No SHIT!”

“Um, would you like to sit down for a bit? It might help to talk it out.”

“Can’t.”

“Too restless, huh?”

“Yeah.”

At that point Remus was mindlessly digging his fingernails into his arm. Patton winced a little and decided to ask, “Can I take care of those injuries, at least? I just want to make sure they don’t get-”

Remus glanced at but barely registered the wounds, “Infected?”

“Yeah.”

“F-first aid kit’s in the bathroom. Not like it matters. It would be just my luck to have a brown recluse bite or resistant staph or necrotizing fasciitis. You know where shit rots and liquefies and you get all septic?! Imagine the SMELL.”

Patton slowly worked his way to the bathroom to get the kit, not taking his eyes away from Remus, “Well, if it looks like it’ll be that way, I WILL be taking your butt to the ER.”

Remus didn’t seem to register that, droning on, “Oh. What if I lose a finger? Or several! Or my entire hands! Everybody says I might die of a heart attack before I hit 30? My ticker feels like it’s going to EXPLODE, Teddy Roosevelt. Imagine a live grenade strapped to it – BOOM. Sounds like fun.”

Patton flinched, thinking that was to get a rise out of him, “Kiddo, I think that’s the opposite of fun.”

Remus weakly laughed, pointing at his chest thoughtlessly, “Better than worrying about cancer or some shit!”

Eventually Patton had to break line of sight to grab the kit, but he kept talking, “When… when did you last get some sleep?”

There was a pause that made Patton’s own heart ache a little bit. Remus muttered after some hemming and hawing, “Uh… 3? 4?  4 days ago? I think. I don’t even fucking know.”

Patton took a moment to look over the medicine cabinet while he was there. Just to see if Remus had anything that could help him get much needed snooze time. There was a bottle of trazodone, mostly full, Benedryl, also mostly full… no suspiciously empty bottles of anything around. So that was a hopeful sign.

“Would you mind if I asked you to take something to help you sleep? After I patch you up?”

“You remember that story where a whole batch of Tylenol was tampered with and killed like seven whole people?”

“… I’ll ask again a little later, then.”

Patton returned to the living room, kit in hand, both relieved and disconcerted about Remus just standing in the same spot he was in. His hands were clenching and unclenching, like he was fighting to stay awake even longer. “Okay, it would be easier on both of us if you sat down while I dress those wounds.”

Remus didn’t move, so Patton tried to gently nudge this poor kid toward the sofa anyways. Thankfully, he didn’t resist at all. Patton noticed just how wobbly a gait he had in that short distance. Once seated, Patton also saw that both his knees were scuffed. Patton winced, imagining that he took at least a few falls very recently.

Without prompting, Remus whined, “Everything hurts, Padre.”

“Well, going without sleep as long as you have can give you a bad case of the body aches. Seen some of my old combat buddies deal with that on our worst deployments…”

Patton started to wipe down Remus’s knuckles first with some cotton balls and alcohol. He just wanted to get a better sense of how deep these cuts were. He was relieved that they were surprisingly shallow, “I think these will only need some simple bandages and antibiotic cream… but I’m definitely going to check on you later, to see how your hands are doing.”

Remus nodded, and started to blather a bit again, “I feel like Hypnos himself has forsaken me. A curse! A bane! Pat? Is his brother going to come for me? Am I going to ride down Styx and meet the big H himself?”

“… you’re not going to die, if I can help it. I swear to God Himself.”

“Gross.”

Patton sometimes forgot that their positions of faith were so far removed. But that didn’t dissuade him from caring a lot. He hated seeing his friend suffering so much. He took another breath, and addressed the gouges and cuts in Remus’s arms. They were rough, probably unintentionally from his own hands. He approached those similarly. “You feeling any sleepier, yet?”

“Mmm… no.”

Remus looked like he was about to pass out, Patton was reasonably sure just the fact he was seated and getting some TLC helped push him closer to shutting his eyes. “Well. I’m going to hang around for a few, just to make sure you’re alright, okay? Mind if I turn on the TV?”

Remus started to slur his speech considerably, “Knock yourself out, Holy Ghost.”

Patton thinly smiled about the blasphemous sentiment, but he shook that off, it didn’t matter really. He was just glad to see Remus doze off like he desperately needed it.

Patton decided to tune into Nickelodeon and watch some cartoon reruns, eventually hearing some loud snoring coming from Remus. Patton sighed and smiled at the sight.

-

“Oh GEEZ, Patton. Were you – were you here all night?”

Patton blinked awake from the shouting and looked outside to see it was bright out, “I-I guess I was?”

Virgil was there to see his boyfriend sleeping like the dead and Patton next to him.

“Logan told me to check on Remus and I just got back here. And-”

“Remus is going to be okay, I think. Do you have any idea what may’ve started this episode?”

Virgil sat down on the recliner nearby and looked tired but contemplative.

“His “family” tried contacting him. All I know was it devolving into a messy fight and it rattled him. He… stubbornly didn’t want to talk about it.”

Patton understood what he meant at this point.

The only blood relative Remus had anything nice to say about was Roman. Someone who should probably know what happened, if he wasn’t already aware.

All to address later, once Remus recovered a little more.

Patton ran his fingers through Remus’s greasy hair. Not the most pleasant, but he hoped it helped to soothe him as he continued to slumber.

Virgil smiled at both of them, his own concern never quite gone, “Thanks for this, Pop Star.”

[caedogeist-rights]

Podcasts ranked by the amount of kissing/gross sounds in it (and also how romance-repulsed/aromantic-friendly it is), by me, your neighborhood aro and hater of Body Sounds. Spoilers ahead for every single podcast listed!

(also, this got long, so uh. see under the break for the full list.)

1. Time:Bombs: The Perfect Podcast, not a gross foley, kiss, or romance-heavy plot in sight. I’ve got nothing bad to say about it, im sorry. It’s perfect.

2. Northwest Footwear Database: It is beauty, it is grace, it has got no Weird Sounds (unless you count a banging song and in-depth discussions of shoes. which i do not). A weird fiction podcast, so not Perfect in the listening, but... still #2 for a reason.

3. RQG: it is a ttrpg podcast. theres very obviously no kissing foley here. Thank G-d, is all im saying. Also has a QPP with a PC, and i give every budding romance an aro thumbs up!

4. Wolf 359: I don’t remember any terrible sounds, there’s no explicit romance- overall, a Good One! 1/2 a point taken off for the mental image of freezer-burned doug.

5. Kaleidotrope: oh, if there ever was a good podcast! This podcast is also kinda obsessed with love, which is nice, but focuses on romantic love for 90% of it, which is less so. Oh kaleidotrope... you need some aros.

6. TSCOSI: I adore this podcast! this is a wonderful podcast with wonderful characters, and I enjoy the ace rep! However, the torture scene in the s1 finale was... less enjoyable. 1 minute of Terrible, but it counts. (we have entered one-strike-territory)

7. The College Tapes: I am filled with adoration, but also, the book and cult chanting is creepy and unnerving. Also, the sheer volume of romantic pining was... overwhelming. Didn’t hate it, but not The Aro Friendly Podcast of my dreams.

8. Mabel: I do not remember much of this podcast, except I enjoyed it and there was some foley that was uncomfortable. Overall, not bad, but... a romance-focused plot, no matter how much I love it, with uh. Weird Sounds.

9. Archive 81: behold, my favorite podcast! Why, you may ask- oh, it simply is the Weird Shit Aro Haven of my dreams! Not a kiss or romantic plot to be found (some of yall ship chris and lee, and i support you, but i never interpreted them as romantic, so It Doesn’t Count on this list). However. the heart-eating scene. the s2 surgery scene. the concept of half the characters? the definition of body horror. Gross! (we have entered into the couple-strikes territory)

10. Stellar Firma: much like a81, perfect except for just one thing, and in this case, its the foot kink shit. Please listen to stellar firma, but also. Hartro’s Foot Kink. I give it my aro sign of approval, though! (I have also only listened up to s2 finale, so uh. idk after that).

11. The Bright Sessions: there are xactly two reasons why this podcast is rated so low on this list. One, there’s quite a bit of romance in this podcast. I’m not against 80% of it, but like... Romance Exists. Two, Safehouse! I do not want or need to hear a man beaten half to death, no matter how much I hate him!

12. TMA: but, you might ask, why is TMA so low? It’s got not a kiss in sight, an a canon ace! Yes, I say, that all is true. It’s why TMA is in its special little category: As An Aro I’m Fine But What The Fuck Bro. An ace main character cannot erase the experience of listening to jon’s hand be burned while I was on a public bus, my Actual Physical Repulsion to michael’s voice, and also all the gore. It’s Gross, Bro! Edit for post e200: yeah.... i must admit the kiss was gross and the sound design really only got more disturbing, so its staying at #12, but... keep in mind that this podcast is simply quite terrible on the ears.

13. Junoverse (Penumbra Podcast): Didn’t mean to make these three popular podcasts the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th worst ones, but what can i say! these fuckers have foley. Junoverse is one of two podcasts in the special category Make Room For Jesus, and juno gets here primarily because of the downright ridiculous amount of making out in it, plus a Giant Subplot being romantic, and also the multiple scenes of torture/a character getting Hurt, Badly. However, not the worst, since while kissing is gross, I can deal. Torture/death/screaming/gore, however...

14. The AM Archives (including Order&Chaos): behold, the pride of the Make Room For Jesus category. I love this podcast/s more than life itself, but I also used transcripts for most of it, so I was able to actually get through it. But from what i could get from transcripts/listening to the finale/asking fellow listeners, its... well, #14 for a reason. And what I can say: this podcast has everything! Burgeoning romance thats, ngl, kinda uncomfortable to listen to! A Kiss (thank you, Order&Chaos, for giving me lovely poly content, but... Kiss Gross)! Copious amounts of screaming and torture! Emotional distress of many varieties (mine included)! Extended Death Scene! I’m sorry, i feel like doing tama a disservice by ranking it last, but unfortunately... it ain’t easy on the ears, and I’m incredibly glad I avoided a lot of it! (...i still did listen to owen’s death, tho. which. aaagh i’ll never be over that one, huh). I love you, TAMA and O&C, but you are hard as hell to listen to.

ty for reading to the end! please, i take aro-friendly podcast suggestions! again, this is based on memory and memory alone (tama excluded), so uh... whoops! if i forgot something important

[clownattack]

^ Words of the person complaining they cant make their own valdemar content (while having a rich history of gatekeeping people making content)

Amazing to know that there are still ppl in 2022 unable to understand aroace spectrum is not a monolith/intent on boxing in aroace relationships with allo ones

anyways,