#'im eating a cookie but i want everyone to know im ANGRILY eating a cookie'

[theonewithacrushonjoey]

Friends? | Joey tribbiani |

Chapter 1

Summary : violet is the sibling of Monica and ross geller, one day her and her other three friends were having coffee at central perk there favorite coffee spot when a wet bride comes tumbling in and changes there life forever.

it was a normal day at the coffee house me working, chandler making jokes, phoebe being quirky, my sister and brother fighting, and joey being.....well joey.

"theres nothing to tell just some guy I work with" Monica says defensively from the couch

"come on, your going out with the guy theres gotta be something wrong with him" joey says

"ok guys give her a break I mean for all we know he could be perfectly normal" I say trying to hide my smile not even believing myself, everyone looks at me for a second and then busts out laughing.

"so does he have a hump, a hump and a hair piece" chandler mocks and monica scoffs.

"wait does he eat chalk? just cause I dont want her to go through what I went through with carl" Phoebe says with sadness, we all just look at her confusedly.

"ok everybody relax this is not even a date, its just two people going out to dinner and not having sex" Monica says look at us seriously

"sounds like a date to me, well unless your joey" I give joey an accusatory look

"hey i dont always have sex on dates"

"yeah sure, you know I room right next to you right?" chandler questions like joeys stupid.

"yeah whatever you both suck" joey says looking at me and chandler sideways.

________________________________________________________________________________

"alright so im back in high school standing in the middle of the cafeteria and I realize I am totally....naked" chandler spit out, the room fills with the sounds of us agreeing that we've all had that dream at some point.

"and I look down and realize there is a phone...there"

"instead of?' I say not wanting to say what I meant in public

"that's right" chandler agrees

'Nope never had that" Joey says coming over and sitting next to me with his coffee In hand

"me either" I say weirded out

"oh and that's not the weirdest past, all of a sudden the phone starts ringing and it turns out its my mother which is very very weird because... she never calls me" chandler says confused

"I dont know if that's more sad or gross" I say look at him turning my head to the side questioningly, I feel joey start laughing from beside me I turn to him and smile I've alway loved his laugh.

________________________________________________________________________________

"so sis where's ross?" I ask.

"I don-" but before she can finish her sentence we hear the coffee house doors open and look over to see a sullen looking ross coming over.

"hi...." ross says looking like a wet puppy from the rain

"oof this guy says hello I want kill myself" joey says I nudge him giving him a shut up look to which he looks down sorrily.

"you ok sweetie" I say holding his hand that was resting on the couch.

"I just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intestine pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck" he says walking over to were chandler was sitting

"cookie" chandler says raising 3 cookies on a plate up to ross, ross just looks at him

"carol moved her stuff out today" Monica revels well all oh and ah "let me get you some coffee" she continues getting up and going over to the waiter at the front

" oh... ah....oh" Phoebe groans as she starts picking the air around ross.

"no stop...stop cleansing my aura" ross says putting his hands up but she continues "no just leave my aura alone ok" he says with finality which makes phoebe stop.

"ill be fine everyone really ok I hope shell be very happy"

"no you dont" I say obviously.

"no I dont to hell with her she left me" ross says angrily.

"and you never knew she was a lesbian" joey says looking at ross expectantly.

"I always has a suspicion something was up" I say looking at joey.

"true you always said that, see ross your sister knew but not you?" joey smirks at me knowing hell get a rise out of him by saying this.

"no! ok why does everyone keep fixating on that, she didn't know how was I suppose to know" he says waving his hands in font of his face annoyed

"sometimes I wish I was a lesbian" chandler says out of nowhere looking down at his newspaper.

"did I say that out loud?" he finishes concerned about himself I smile at him as Monica comes back over and gives him his coffee.

" alright ross look your feeling a lot of pain right now your angry, your hurting, can I tell you what the answer is?" joey questions but I already know its gonna be a stupid answer.

"strip joints!' he says like its obvious, I wave him off

"come on joey" I say trying to hide my smile at his ridiculousness but he notices and nudges me playfully to which I break and smile fully

"maybe joeys right I mean come on your single have some fun" I say

"see but I dont want to be single I just want to be married again" he says sadly, Monica rubbing his shoulder to try to comfort him, then all of a sudden the doors to the coffee house swing open and busts through a girl in a wet wedding gown, we all look towards her confused and surprised.

"and I want million dollars" candler yells towards the door I scoff laughing looking back towards the girl in white she looks familiar for some reason.

Monica gets up going towards her "Rachel?" she questions.

"oh god Monica hi oh thank god I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer sad that you might be here and you are you are!" Rachel rushes out.

"can i get you some coffee" one of my waitress friends say from behind the counter.

"decaf" Monica says walking over with Rachel

"Rachel hey its me violet Monica and Rosses sister" I was hoping she remembered me as we were all kinda best friends at one point.

"vi! omg hey its you, you look so good!" she says coming over and hugging me tightly getting me slightly wet from her dress.

"hey everybody this is Rachel another Lincoln high survivor, this is everybody" I say pointing to everyone

'this is chandler dont mind him he's kinda special" I whisper to her but chandler hears and makes a face at me to which I stick my tongue out back at him.

"this is phoebe she's great weird but great" I say pointing towards phebs to which she smiles sweetly

"and the is joey the playboy of the century" I say smirking at him he just scoffs and smiles at Rachel

'Ignore her" joey says waving at rach

"and ross my brother you remember him right?"

"sure!" she goes to shake his hand but his umbrella pops out making it extremely awkward I smile covering my mouth with my hand going back over to my seat next to joey leaning on him a little this time, feeling a little tired from all the social interaction going on to which he senses right away and leans back so I can get more comfortable. he's always had a way of reading my mind in a sense.

(To be continued) I hope you guys like this chapter! I've loved friends and Joey since I was a kid and just wanted to write about it :)

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Snow Job

leverage 1.09

Wayne: Mr. Retzing I want to talk to you for one moment, please. (walks toward Retzing) Just one moment. (punches Retzing in the face)

we love to see corrupt assholes punched in the face

- - - - -

Eliot: Where the hell is he at?

Hardison: Maybe he overslept.

Eliot: No. He doesn't oversleep. This guy sets an alarm to set his alarm.

Parker: A man with one watch knows the time. A man with two is never sure.

Sophie: Huh?

Parker: I had fortune cookies for breakfast.

(Nate walks in looking very rough)

Nate: Okay, run it.

Hardison: So, what, you had left over Chinese for breakfast?

Parker: No, just the cookies.

Hardison: Do you put milk on the fortune cookies? ‘Cause I don’t…

Parker: It's not cereal. It's a fortune cookie. You don't dunk it.

Nate: Whoa, no chatter today. Just -- Just run it

we love the chaotic ot3

like, poor eliot. he fell in love with “I once ate a pizza pocket off the ground” alec hardison and “I eat fortune cookies for breakfast” parker

- - - - -

Sophie: Are you drunk?

Nate: Technically, no. I was drunk a couple hours ago. Now I’m just hung over.

- - - - -

[Resort Lounge]

(Randy looks through the planner, finds her passport, and does an internet search)

[Resort Bar]

Hardison: Sorry, Ute Ausgatner.

(Hardison uses photoshop to superimpose Sophie’s face on an actual Luge athelete)

[Ute Ausgatner’s House]

(Ute is surfing the internet and finds all the pictures of her have been change to that of Sophie. She starts cursing in German to her mother)

SKSKNSNDNKKS

- - - - -

Sophie: Here we got to make room for heli-Skiing pad, you know, all the usual, you know, spa's facilities. We're gonna have the heated plunge pools and the Jacuzzis and the hot tubs.

Randy: Ski in, ski out?

Sophie: Yeah. Boom?

Randy: Boom

their entire plan here was EXTREMELY ridiculous

- - - - -

Nate: Okay, Parker. Go.

[Ski Lift]

(Parker calmly dives off the lift, hanging by it from one hand, completely unconcerned)

Nate: Parker?

[Resort Bar]

Nate: Parker?

[Ski Lift]

Nate: Parker?

Parker: Hmm?

Nate: What are you doing?

Parker: Oh, yeah. (sounding bored) Help. Help. (to man) How you doin’?

[Resort Bar]

Nate (facepalms): Oh, geez

“how you doin’” IM SCREAMING

- - - - -

(Eliot is showing a display to Rockman)

Eliot: And unlike conventional fireplaces, these have marshmallow toasting rods already built in and retractable. Brand-new.

where do they even get these ideas ???

(lowkey I’d want one of those fireplaces)

- - - - -

the picture of eliot and his VERY seriously fake german wife I’m screaming

- - - - -

Randy: Oh, come on, dude, are you ready to rock this?

(Randy grabs Eliot and hugs him, lifting him off the ground. Eliot looks uncomfortable)

Eliot: Yeah

eliot looks so uncomfortable it’s amazing

- - - - -

Sophie: So, uh, you can write that little check now, eh?

[Resort Bar]

Hardison: Hey, why can't they all be this easy?

[Resort Office]

Randy: Of course not. We have to go to Miami. My dad's the one who has to write the check.

[Resort Bar]

Hardison: Aw, hell, why they all got to be this hard?

let hardison have an easy job 2k20

- - - - -

Retzing: Randy. So, where you been this time -- Europe?

Randy: No.

Retzing: Caribbean?

Randy: No.

Retzing: Well, give me the dirty details.

Randy: Just some skiing. Dad, meet Leena Christinger.

Sophie: Guten tag.

Retzing: French. Nice

“french? nice” sophie looks ready to scream

- - - - -

the scene of parker and eliot running around in the back yard is cute y’all but I’ll take literally any ot3 interaction and adore it so

+

eliot nodding at parker, not having to say anything before he boosts her up to the second floor

+

I’m sorry but her lil thieving outfit with suspenders is ADORABLE

- - - - -

[Office]

(Parker plants a bug on the back of a frame, sees someone at the door, pulls the flash drive from the laptop, and dives out the window)

[Exterior House]

(Eliot sees Parker falling toward him)

Eliot: Holy...

(Parker lands on Eliot, knocking him to the ground)

Eliot: Damn it, Parker. A little warning next time. How'd you even know I’d be there?

Parker: I didn't

eliot will always catch her because that’s just who he is

also, she just had blind faith that she’d be okay ??? like that’s just her way of thinking- act now, figure it out on the way down

she didn’t know eliot would be there, but that is the first time out of MANY for the rest of their lives that eliot is there to catch her when she falls

they don’t know it yet, but he’ll always be there to make sure she’s safe and sound

- - - - -

Nate: And besides, we're going with a much bigger scam. One of the classics.

Parker: The London Spank?

Hardison: The Genevan Paso Doble.

Eliot: The Apple Pie. (everyone looks at him questioningly) It's like the cherry pie, but with lifeguards.

Sophie: Ooh.

Nate: Glengarry Glen Death. It's like a-a mutual fund, but instead of stocks, you invest in--in death. (walks out on balcony)

Parker: I-Is it me, or is he getting creepier?

we love to hear all of the wacky con names

- - - - -

parker had like a million rubber bands around her fingers ??? maybe it’s a boredom thing that she does ???

- - - - -

Eliot: You know, we could get another chamber, and then put a brain with a tumor in that one and then send the signal to the monitor for this chamber. Cross the wires.

(everyone looks at him)

Eliot: What? I dated a neurologist.

(Sophie looks pleased)

he never said the gender (he often doesn’t when talking about his past lovers) and I stan him for that- also it lets us assume that some of them were men

ALSO

eliot really pays attention to his lovers! he listens to them about their jobs and their lives and it is shown many times throughout the series

- - - - -

Nate: What we need to do is, we need to secure this chamber and the one next to it, have to make sure that the coms work with the magnetic interference, set up a meeting with the Retzings. Somebody find me a brain.

Parker: Oh, yeah. He's definitely getting creepier

the way she says it in a sing song voice tho

- - - - -

(Eliot prepares the body as Hardison gets the shot ready. Hardison turns and holds the shot out to Eliot who takes it but hands it back)

Hardison: What? You.

Eliot: Go.

Hardison: What you mean, "go"?

Eliot: Because it was your idea.

Hardison: No. No. No. No. It's my information. It's Nate’s idea to do this nastiness.

(they both look at the body)

Eliot: Rock-Paper-Scissors?

(Hardison nods. Eliot sticks the shot into the body’s leg and they play two rounds of Rock-Paper-Scissors, Eliot watching Hardison’s face. Hardison loses)

Hardison: Well, I’ll be damned. How you do that?

Eliot: You got a tell.

(Eliot hands the shot to Hardison)

Hardison: I have a tell.

Eliot: Yeah.

Hardison: In Rock-Paper-Scissors?

Eliot: Yeah, go.

the first of MANY rock paper scissors disputes that always end up in eliot’s favor

- - - - -

(Parker joins Eliot and Hardison sitting on the MRI machine, listening. She gestures with her hands for the boys to scoot over so she can sit between them.)

how she gestures with her hands for them to move over and they immediately scoot so that she can sit in the middle ? iconic. beautiful. glorious.

- - - - -

Nate: Payout bonus kind of thing. (writing check) $100,000?

[MRI Room 1]

Parker: What is he doing?!

(Parker gets up angrily and heads for door, a moment later, Eliot follows her)

Hardison (to body): Sup?

[Hallway]

Nate: There you go (hands him check) 100G.

Dennis: I think this just might work out after all.

Sophie: With this money, you know, you can start your own company, just leave your father for good, hey?

(behind them in the hall, Parker comes out, headed for Nate. Eliot picks her up and carries her back out of sight)

chaotic ot3

- - - - -

Nate: Guys, you got to trust me, all right? You've trusted me before, and with your life.

Eliot (slams his hand down on the table): Not when you're drunk.

Nate: Oh, come on.

Eliot: You're not in control of yourself.

Nate: So, what, you're gonna control me? Is that it?

Eliot: Ah, I ain't your daddy. You can drink yourself into a coma as far as I’m concerned, but you take me down with you -- then it's my problem.

Nate: You know, you talk too much. You ought to just go skip some rope.

Eliot: What? What? (gets up angrily)

Nate: Skip some rope.

Eliot: You want me to skip something? (heads across the room)

Sophie: Hey, hey! (gets in front of Eliot)

Eliot: I'll skip your drunk ass off this marble floor

eliot wants everyone to be safe + you can tell he’s had troubled alcoholics making bad, endangering decisions in his past and eliot is not going to have that be in his life again

- - - - -

eliot was dressed like a true floridian in the bank scene- bulky, fake gold jewelry, sunglasses, check hawaiian shirt, etc

he was the og florida man

[rogsclogs]

Some Day One Day (Brian May x Reader); part 12

I’m sorry this took a while to post, I was unhappy with how it originally turned out and had to rewrite it a couple of times. Hope you enjoy it, next part will be up very soon, hopefully by tomorrow. The series is almost over :,)

tag list: @brighter-thanthe-sky @im-a-sheerheartattack @fruityfreddie @discodeakygotmorerhythm @killer-queen-xo @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @alfinaldelarcoiriss @warren-lauren @kazzish @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @avengerraven1023 @imgonnabeyourslave

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They lived happily ever after since then.

At least, that's what I’d like to tell you, but we both know that’s not how it’s going to go, don't we?

However, things did go perfectly right for quite some time and everything in Brian and Y/N’s lives was amazing, especially their relationship. As soon as Y/N started her master course she got right into it, arriving at every lecture on time and with all her work done and ready to hand in, much to Brian’s happiness. All he wanted was to see her succeed, after all. At first he had offered to help her do her school work, but she obviously refused to let him do so, her pride taking over her rational side which told her that getting help wouldn't be such a big deal after all. Even when she did have classes with him she always rejected any help Brian offered, which kind of frustrated him, but he was even more proud of her when she got things right knowing she did everything by herself.

Then, right after school, he would drive her back to their apartment and they would spend the afternoon together, sometimes baking cookies for Emily and sometimes having sex for hours on end, depending on their mood. 

Mostly the ladder, though.

Y/N was in the second trimester of her course when something started feeling off.

She started waking up feeling something within her bugging her and she went to sleep feeling the same way.

She had been vocal about it with Brian, but even though he was keen on having a doctor visit her, she kept pushing her visit back, not wanting to cause any trouble to anyone and figuring whatever it was that made her sick would soon disappear.

knowing how easily she was affected by stress, she also figured that that could be the reason behind her sickness, after all she was still going through a hard time with her family and such, none of her relatives were particularly happy to find she was living with a man who was twice her age and had a daughter with another woman, but she couldn't be bothered to hide it either although she’d never told anyone that he was in fact her university professor, that was way too risky for anyone to be aware of. Still, most of her family were totally against it and a huge part of them had stopped talking to Y/N altogether, not that she was too sad about the loss, it was mostly just disappointment making her upset.

It could be the stress of knowing everything in your life is going great, cause that is in itself a reason to be stressed out, especially when you're used to dealing with constant chaos and people trying to mess you up.

It could be the immense love she felt for Brian moving around in her body everyday, which she often though would make her sick because she truly loved that man more than anything and anyone else.

It could be some of the things that little Emily offered her to eat when she played cook, they could absolutely be toxic for all she knew (she immediately felt silly for thinking something like that, knowing damn well how obsessed Brian was with double checking anything that came close to his daughter’s mouth to make sure it was safe).

It could be anything in the world and it was probably temporary anyway, so why would she worry the people around her? There was no need for it.

And maybe Y/N could have gotten away with it, if it hadn't been for her body giving up on her, quite literally.

It all started on a foggy winter morning, Y/N woke up feeling rather ill and couldn't bring herself to have anything for breakfast. Brian had tried to convince her over and over again, but there was no point in forcing her to get food in her system if she felt like she couldn't keep it down anyway.

She felt extremely nauseous and lightheaded, and Brian was worried knowing she was most likely not telling him just how sick she was really feeling, so he tried to convince her to stay home from school, even promising to collect all the worksheets she would need to catch up on her homework, but to no avail. Y/N was very stubborn and sometimes Brian wished she could just give into his requests when they came from a place of worry and care, but he knew it would be pointless to argue so he just forced her to take whatever medicine he had at home and got in the car with her and Emily.

The whole ride he kept an eye on the two girls in the backseat (Emily didn't like sitting by herself back there, so whenever Y/N was around she would always offer to keep her company) and soon realized Y/N seemed to be moving in slow motion, like she was too tired to react to what Em was talking to her about. Not that the little girl would notice anyway, she was rambling about something that had happened at daycare the day before and she had her usual bright smile taking over the features of her face. She was way too young to realize how pale Y/N looked and how distracted she was, especially because she tried her best to keep up with the conversation, mostly so she wouldn't worry Brian.

She even offered to walk Emily into the building where her daycare was, which Brian begged her not to do as a lot of people there knew who Emily’s mom was and he knew they wouldn't keep their stupid mouths shut.

He tried once more to convince his girl to get back home right before they got into the school parking lot.

“I can tell you're not feeling great, why do you do this to yourself? Just take a goddamn day off Y/N, you're not gonna miss that much anyway”

“Brian, you know how I feel about days off when they're not necessary”

“But right now it IS necessary! It’s basically written all over your face that you're sick, I've never seen you look this pale before and you haven't even had anything for breakfast, which is not only unhealthy but very unlike you. Please, I am begging you, just let me drive you back home, I don't care if I'm ten minutes late to my lecture, I'm sure everyone will understand”

“I’m not having this conversation with you again, Bri. I’m fine. I’ll see you in third period” was all she said before angrily stepping out of the car and slamming the door behind her, leaving Brian in his car to curse himself for pushing her too far. He should have just listened to her, if she needed something she would tell him without being forced to.

He pushed himself to get out of his vehicle and to stop thinking about Y/N, he had more important things to focus on: papers to grade, lessons to go over and his students’ questions to answer. He couldn't afford to let her distract him, no matter how much he cared for her wellbeing, after all she was a responsible adult.

They both went on with their day as normal, even though Y/N kept feeling worse by the minute. All the people who had seen her that morning could sense that something was going on, but only a few of them pointed it out to her, not wanting to seem rude. She had sighed deeply and ignored everyone’s questions, wondering if she really looked so bad that everyone in school seemed to be so interested in knowing how she was doing. 

She almost got into an argument with Joe because he too tried to convince her to go back home. After their ‘date’ at the cinema, Y/N had tried her best to distance herself from him, not only because she knew Brian didn't love the idea of them hanging out, but also because she was almost positive Joe was crushing hard on her, and she didn't want to lead him on or have to deal with any jealousy issues. Still, he tried to talk to her almost on a daily basis and didn’t seem to get the memo that she just wasn't interested, so Y/N dealt with it and stopped complaining, knowing there was not much he could do once school was over. On that day, however, he had gotten so much on her nerves that she couldn't help but slightly lash out at him, it was none of his business how she was feeling and she didn't want to admit how seriously worried she was starting to become for her own health.

So, she just isolated herself until third period eventually came, and she made a mental note to herself to apply some makeup before entering the lecture hall so that maybe Brian wouldn't be too worried about her if she didn't look sick.

However, she never actually made it to the bathroom as she felt herself slowly slip out of consciousness right as she was getting there and her body fell limp on the hard floor. 

[storytellerofuntoldlegends]

Just a Tease

A/N: Apparently the Seven Deadly Sins au is the only thing I have motivation to write atm. You can read the first fic in this au here, and the fic @robanilla wrote for it here! Also @broadwaytheanimatedseries is gonna have a fic that is a sequel to this one, I’ll link that here when it’s posted!

Warnings: implied sexual content, flirting, teasing, food mention, kissing, swearing

Greed was… frustrated, to say the least. It wasn’t the usual frustration he felt with his colleagues, unfortunately. No, he wished it was the disappointment and exasperation he felt at his fellow demons’ failures to ensnare humanity. He would have much preferred that to this burning, flaming frustration he currently felt. A part of him wondered if this was how Wrath felt all the time… but that was a query for later.

The source of this frustration? Lust. The tall demon was far too gorgeous for his own good, and his recent behavior hadn’t been helping much.

It had started when Greed had just arrived at the manor, before the meeting had started. He had given a curt nod to the Gatekeeper, then headed into the parlor. Greed was about to head to his seat at the table, but a figure suddenly materialized just behind him.

“Oh… I’m sorry, I’m afraid I didn’t see you there,” a voice purred, their breath ghosting against his neck and shooting shivers down his spine.

Greed opened his mouth to retort, but a hand trailed across his lower back as the figure moved past him, causing a sharp gasp to escape him instead. The figure was, of course, Lust, and he winked at Greed as he sauntered to his seat.

“Something wrong there, Greed?” Envy teased as he walked in, taking his usual seat.

“I’m fine,” Greed replied with a slight snarl to his voice.

“Is that so? Wrath must be spreading her influence again,” Pride snarked as she took her seat.

“No, this isn’t me this time!” Wrath protested as she stalked over to her seat beside Lust.

“Hmm… well this seems a touch more intense than his usual seething disappointment in us,” Sloth drawled, having materialized in his chair.

“He’s probably such a grumpy gus cause he skipped breakfast! I’m telling you dude, most important meal of the day,” Gluttony teased from the doorway.

“Just sit down so we can start the meeting,” Greed seethed.

“Whatever you say, bossman. But I did bring something that I think will cure your hangry mood,” Gluttony said as he sat down.

“Oh?” Greed asked, arching one eyebrow as he took his place at the head of the table. Gluttony smirked, and with a wave of his hand, a plate of cookies appeared. The table was sent into a confused silence, varying degrees of bewilderment on each demon’s face, except for Gluttony who was grinning smugly.

“Are those… chocolate chip?” Envy asked.

“Nope, they’re dark chocolate chip,” Gluttony replied, grin growing wider.

“Ugh.”

“Well if you don’t want one, guess there’s just more for the rest-”

“Shut UP and give me a cookie,” Envy scowled. The table erupt into laughter, and each demon reached forward to take a cookie from the plate.

Greed was about to retrieve his own share of the cookies, when Lust leaned across the table, ending up tantalizingly close to Greed. There was no need for Lust to lean across the table like that, his tall and rather lanky form would have been able to reach the cookies just fine if he were sitting normally, but no! He had to stretch over right into Greed’s personal space, almost leaning against him, but the barest amount of space between them. This distance between them seemed to light fire in Greed’s veins, and he was torn between shoving the other demon away or pulling him closer so that he could touch and take-

Lust suddenly moved away, and Greed’s face flushed ever so slightly and his eyes widened at where his last train of thought was heading. He quickly glanced around the table and was relieved to see that no one else seemed to notice his flustered expression- except for Pride, who was smirking at him knowingly. Greed glared at her and snatched up a cookie, munching it angrily.

“See? Much better,” Gluttony said, grinning. Greed rolled his eyes, but continued eating the cookie anyway. Gluttony was a fantastic baker.

“Mmm… Gluttony, these are exquisite. I’d say the only thing more exquisite than them is you,” Lust cooed. Greed felt something snap inside of him, but he kept his expression neutral. The only sign that something was amiss was that the shadows flickered dangerously behind him.

“Oh, stop it you,” Gluttony laughed, waving his hand dismissively.

“I only speak the truth!” Lust replied with a wink, and Greed’s mouth set in a firm line. He wasn’t sure why he was feeling this way, Lust was just a tease! He flirted with everyone, it was how he worked. Besides, there wasn’t anything between them. There was no reason to feel jealous- not that he was jealous! But that didn’t stop Envy from raising an eyebrow at him.

“Wonderful, we’ve all had cookies, let’s move on,” Greed growled, before anyone could comment on his behavior. For once, no one protested or had a snide remark, and the meeting could begin.

The meeting continued without a hitch… for Lust, at least. Throughout the meeting, he would find ways to brush up against Greed with the lightest of touches, or talk in his low voice that set mortal hearts ablaze. But despite this, Lust hardly got any reaction from the other demon. Sure, there was the sharp intake of breath, the way his eyes would widen, and of course the gorgeous shade of pink his cheeks would turn, but besides that? Nothing. No indication that he was having an affect on him.

With the meeting over, Lust began to rise from his seat like the others were, but Greed sent a glare his way, a silent demand to stay put. He sank back into his chair, trying not to let a smug expression take over his face. Greed seemed pleased by this, and turned to bid the others farewell. Lust smirked. Perhaps he had succeeded after all.

“Have fun with that, I’ve sensed the frustration coming off of him all night,” Wrath muttered as she rose from her seat.

“Yeah, I’ve sensed some jealousy from him too. It was nice knowing ya, buddy,” Envy chimed in, before turning on his heel and leaving the parlor.

“Ignore them, they’re probably being dramatic. Probably. You can never tell with Greed,” Sloth advised, before vanishing into thin air.

Soon Pride and Gluttony left as well, leaving Lust and Greed the only two demons left in the parlor. Greed had his back to him, and not that Lust wasn’t enjoying the view, but he was concerned with how quiet the other demon was. That is, until he turned around and he saw the blazing fire in his eyes.

“Get up,” Greed growled.

“Make me,” Lust challenged with a smirk. Greed scowled, storming over to him and grabbing a fistful of his hoodie, pulling him up into a fierce kiss. Lust groaned into the kiss, and he could feel the shiver that ran through Greed’s body. He smirked against his mouth, and rose up from his seat, forcing the other demon to stumble backwards. He wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled Greed flush against his body, causing him to let out a muffled yelp against his lips.

After a moment or two, Lust pulled away, grinning madly. Greed let out a whine, his mouth quickly snapping shut after, embarrassed at the sound. This only caused Lust’s grin to grow wider.

“Mmm, I like a man who takes what he wants,” he purred, leaning down and mouthing along his neck. Greed let out a gasping cry, but it soon morphed into a growl as he pushed Lust forward. The tall demon stumbled back, momentarily afraid that he had done something wrong, but then Greed was pressing him against the wall, capturing his lips in a kiss that was all teeth and tongue. One of Lust’s hands clutched the back of his leather jacket, while the other hand skimmed down his back, traveling lower-

Greed let out an uncharacteristic squeak, and Lust pulled away to grin wolfishly at him. His face was flushed and he was panting heavily- he had never been more gorgeous. And as Greed pulled him into another fierce kiss, Lust realized something. He was in love. Fuck.

Tag List:  @adorably-angsty @alix-the-skeleton @allthemetalsoftherainbow @armageddonhascome @backatthebein @bangthekobrakid @bloodropsblog @cefinitely-rolo @coffeestudylive @cosmic-chu @cyndaquil17 @dani-jeanso @didsomeonesayprince @emphoenixcat @every-day-insomniac @fandomsandanythingelse @freekiphotography @freepaperie081 @hanramz-the-fander @im-basically-logan @i-need-a-social-life-2710 @i-really-dig-the-purple @ironwoman359 @justanotherpurplebutterfly @kanejandkruge @kitsuneprideleader @kittycake574 @le2712 @littlemiracle05 @loganpatton @lollingtothemax @look-its-meme @loverofpizzaandallthingssweet @lynlinked @mewsicalmiss @midnightcandy @moonstonefox @musicsavedmefromdeath @mystrangedarkson @nightmarejasmine @not-as-smart @of-treble-and-dragons @punsterterry @purplepatton @quoth-the-sparrow @radioactivehelena @royallyanxious @ruuworld @sanders-trash-4ever @save-me-oh-dream-of-mine @shadowsfromthesun @shygirl4991 @sleepyssnail @softbludemon @softnic @sombraplayslazertag @sweetinsomniac @the-fandoms-are-takin-over @theresneverenoughfandoms @thisrandomperson102 @thuriweaver @vigilantvirgil

[dovechim]

soft bias tag

who better to tag me in such a soft tag than my softest fluffiest mutual ever @gukyi​ 🌻🐝🔆

Who’s my bias?

park jimin, fluff and mochi extraordinaire 

What made you notice them?

when i first saw him in weekly idol, messing up the random play dances so many times and constantly getting caught! he had this sheepish, cute little smile  and honestly he was just like a puppy begging for my attention, how could i not??? 

What’s your favourite thing about them?

his chubby cheeks, short fingers, his love and care for everyone around him, the way he throws his whole body about when he laughs, how clumsy he is despite being a contemporary dancer (i realised this is more than one thing but still!)

Who would initiate skinship more?

him. jimin is so incredibly touchy, he’s always hugging and throwing himself into the members’ embraces and forcing them to hug him etc etc :”) by contrast im not a very touchy person but I would be the one constantly asking to hold his hand!!

Who would hog the blankets more?

tbh... me. i like to wrap myself into a burrito no matter how hot it is, and i always need a blanket on some part of my body. he’d probably whine that this makes it hard for him to cuddle too

Who would be more clingy?

him, definitely!!!!!! jimin is the clingiest of babies and by contrast, i kinda like my private time. when we’re together there’ll probably be times where i dont want him to leave and that’s the clingiest i’ll be. sometimes i go days without talking to those i love, and its rly hard to break myself out of that so that’ll be his job!!!

Who would say I love you first?

jimin definitely. im not the most eloquent with expressing or showing feeling, and i tend to get embarrassed. in contrast, he’s so open with his emotions and would probably surprise me by saying it in the most mundane of moments :”)

Who would easily be more flustered?

definitely me. i am the most whipped for him ever. and he just has this tendency of being cute without even realising it!!!!

What cuddling position would you two have?

in bed, legs entangled, my head on his arm, buried in his chest or neck, his chin resting on the top of my head, occasionally pressing his nose into my hair and telling me that it smells and i need to wash it. in return i’ll tickle him or pinch his nipple and we’ll get into a little tussle that might get heated :”) 

Which colours remind you of him?

YELLOW. lemon yellow, and rich, buttered marigold. also lavender!!

What season would you like to spend with them?

winter!!! for the sole reason of seeing his sweater paws!!

Who would bake the cookies and who would steal the batter?

i would bake the cookies, convincing myself not to pinch the batter till jimin sneaks up behind me, distracts me with a pinch to my waist and then his fingers digging into the dough. i’d scold him for being unhygienic and risking getting sick, but then seeing how well he enjoys the cookie batter, i’d probably give in too :”)

Which one of you would make bad puns and how would the other react?

i would make the puns, and jimin would double over in laughter like how he usually does every single time even if they weren’t funny. what’s a significant other for if they dont laugh at your unfunny jokes?

Who would want to adopt 50 cats and dogs?

we would both want cats, but he’d also want the dogs, and while i’d be content with one or two, jimin would adopt the whole lot. of course not without a ton of begging on his part, and the unfair use of those puppy eyes of his

Which one of you would nearly burn the kitchen down trying to microwave a pop tart and who would come to the rescue?

definitely jimin. he’d be the type to text while at work: “babe how long should i microwave this mac and cheese for?” even though the instructions are stated right on the packet and i would text back in annoyance, but then call him to make sure he gets his food alright. only to ask: “baby, you took out the aluminium foil before putting it in right?” 

to which he stutters a shaky ‘yes’. 

Who likes to lean over trail railings and who would pull them back?

jimin definitely loves leaning, and me being the worrywart that i am, constantly gets anxious because i know how clumsy he is

What would watching a horror movie be like?

ahh it depends!! i’m bad at horror movies, but if the person im watching it with is worse than me, i’ll pretend not to be scared just so i can comfort them. jimin’s also pretty scared himself, but i have a feeling he’d want to put on a front just to impress me. so like two idiots, we’ll both be cowering in fear but refusing to show it. 

Who would be the cheesy flirt and who would be the smooth flirt?

i cant flirt at all, so he would have to be both for the both of us!!

Who would be more competitive?

jimin. as with most things, i dont really care that much for winning, but i know he can get really into it, but honestly i might want to win just to see him yell angrily in that cute way that he has :”) 

Who would have to be given constant reminders (to eat, sleep, drink water, etc.)?

i think its a tie, tbh. jimin can be really naggy when it comes to sending reminders, and we’d probably lie awake at 2am facing each other, telling each other to go to sleep but then continuing to stare and giggle at each other. 

Who sends memes and who sends cute “i miss you” texts at 3 am?

on the meme front, it would definitely be me. i annoy so many of my mutuals with constant dirty memes. he would be the clingy texter, sending a barrage of texts asking me what im doing at 4am since he doesnt sleep till 6am, and i’d probably reply to an “i miss you baby” with a weird convoluted meme :”)

this was so fun to do!!!! and it made me so soft :”) im tagging @jimlingss @bang-tan-bitch @94hixtape @kingdomtae @wonhopes and of course anyone else who would like to do this!!!

[drags-bro]

HitsuMatsu #3: The yearly hideout

    It was one of those calm, peaceful nights. Even though it would be more approriate to call it “early morning”, since the whole Soul Society would be awake in a few minutes, everyone going back to their daily activities. Inside the 10th squad barracks, you could only hear a clock ticking, and the distant noise of someone writing on paper.      Those last days had been tiring for everyone, with the reconstruction of the Soul Society on-going, the overwhelmed 4th squad, and the huge amount of paperwork caused by all those circumstances. That’s one of the reasons explaining why Rangiku Matsumoto was deeply asleep, randomly lying in her bed, a Saké bottle hidden somewhere under her blanket. Then suddenly, the writing noise stopped, and someone entered into Rangiku’s bedroom.

“Matsumoto.” … “Matsumoto.” repeated an irritated voice. ….. “Matsumotooooo!” shouted 10th squad captain, Toshiro Hitsugaya, as quietly as possible.

“Eh…eh? what’s up, cap’n…” mumbled Rangiku’s sleepy voice.

Toshiro was slightly sweating, and seemed in quite a hurry.

“It’s today! Hurry up!” he nervously answered. “Oh? But it’s only been a month since last time…” “Well, yeah, that’s the idea of the whole thing.” “You’re right…” said Rangiku as she was half waking-up. “Prepare a day worth of paperwork to bring with you” continued Toshiro, as he was gathering ink, pen and brush. “Oh, I did that before going to sleep…look…” proudly answered a wrapped-into-her-blanket Rangiku.

Toshiro looked at what was in his lieutenant’s hand. “…Matsumoto.” “Yes?” “Didn’t i just tell you to bring a day worth of paperwork?” “Yes?” “…then can I know why you’re holding a SINGLE piece of paper?” asked Toshiro, trying to keep his composure.  Well, “ replied Rangiku “No, wait, don’t mind answering. I’ll just bring your share of paper. Be sure to be down there in five minutes, we don’t have much time.” simply said Toshiro as he was leaving the room. “Aww…captaiiin…” started complaining Rangiku. “No Aw. No captaiiin. Five minutes.” curtly replied Toshiro. “Ok…lemme sleep just one more minute then…” said Rangiku as she was closing her eyes.

    When she opened her eyes again, she was lying on a sofa, in a dark room. Some unusual noises and ambiant hustling did wake her up. She looked around and saw her captain, working on a desk, with a huge pile of paper next to him.

“Finally awake?” He asked, without taking his eyes off his pen. “Myeah…” answered Rangiku. “Perfect, come and start working too then.”

Rangiku took a look at the horrifyingly high pile of paper waiting for her.

“…Wouldn’t you prefer me to attain Bankai? I mean, i got some nice talk with Haineko lately and i think..” tried Rangiku “We’ll train later if you want” interrupted Toshiro, who had no intent of bargaining. “For now, it’s paperwork.”

Rangiku unwillingly left the sofa to take the seat in front of her captain. She took a paper and put it on the desk, in front of her. She looked at her captain and asked: “Where are we, this year?” “A room i made under my actual desk in the barracks.” answered Toshiro, with his eyes still staring at his paper. “Er…do you think it’s safe enough? I mean , they end up finding the hideout everytime anyway…” stated Rangiku. “I had the Kuchiki siblings to help me build up several kidos hiding and protecting us from intrusion. We focused on the protecting part though, since they’ll indeed find it anyway.” answered Toshiro. “Would you mind, i don’t know, maybe taking a pen and helping me?” he added. “Mmmmh…yeah…” said Rangiku while picking up a pen. “You didn’t have to go to such lengths though…”

Toshiro looked Matsumoto at last. He seemed a bit irritated again. “Well, i wouldn’t have to if you weren’t the cause of this to happen”, he said. “Me?” asked Matsumoto, with surprised eyes “As far as i know, i’m not the one giving chocolates to EVERY guy in the Soul Society on Valentine’s day only to receive as many gifts as possible on White day. If you’d keep this to friends and family, we wouldn’t have to be here during the whole day, waiting for thousands and thousands of gifts to be delivered into our barracks and hiding from the hundreds of guys trying to find you and declare their love for you!” he angrily replied. Rangiku seemed amused, and it managed to piss him off even more. He did a sort of “Tch” then got back to what he was writing.

    Matsumoto looked at the word she just lazily wrote. It had an amazingly boring-effect on her. Then she laid her eyes on her captain’s paper pile and wondered once again how he was able to do such a thing. She looked at Toshiro’s pen regularly moving and his face remaining unruffled. A malicious spark suddenly appeared in her eyes. “Did you carry me?” she asked “…eh?” made her captain, whose face seemed to blush, probably because of the weak light from the candle on the desk. “I mean, i was in this sofa when i woke up but i didn’t go on it myself, so did you carry me?” she asked again, slyly smiling “Well, yes.” Toshiro answered, undisturbed. Rangiku, looked at him, imagining the scene.  “Teehee… you’re cute ♥”  Hearing this, Toshiro quickly glanced at his lieutenant before getting back at work. “And you’re heavy” he replied. He then superbly dodged a pen thrown at high speed to his face while a “That’s not something you can say to a woman!!” resonated throughout the room.  “Sorry, sorry” said Toshiro to his lieutenant, with a little grin on his face. “I wasn’t serious.”

    Rangiku grumpily looked at him. Although her captain’s paper pile kept on growing, hers didn’t. Well, it didn’t even exist to begin with, since she didn’t complete the first one. And on top of that, she started to be hungry. “When can we eat?” she asked “I didn’t have time to prepare lunch.” calmly answered Toshiro “WHAT?! HOW ARE WE GOING T…” Rangiku started, feeling her hunger growing even faster than her superior’s paperwork pile. “However”, continued Toshiro, as if she didn’t say a thing, “i had to prepare cookies for some occasion, and brought them here. Feel free to have them.��,he explained, picking a cute box full of cookies up from under the desk and putting it down near his lieutenant. Rangiku found it cute, how Toshiro wouldn’t give his White day present directly to her, every year. There would always be some special circumstances for it, which would make it look like it wasn’t his choice or that it wasn’t a gift. Although she knew very well that it was, and she even suspected him to be aware that she knew, while still making excuses for it because he’d be too embarassed to present something to her.

“What kind of occasion?”,  she teased him. No answer. “…well, i’ll have them with pleasure” she added, a smile on her face.

_______________________________________ Notes: On Valentines in japan, girls offer chocolates to boys, who then must give back gifts such as jewelry, or cookies on the White day, which is a month later ( thats at least what i think i understood from it xD) Oh and please tell me any mistakes i did, im not english x.x This one wasn’t specially cute but idk, the whole thing makes me crack up when  imagining the scene xD