#𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙍𝘼𝘾𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉 | text

[sudcikis]

Jason: You call your goats Krampus and Santa, I feel like it's opening up a world of mischief. Jason: Hurled into the sun. Literally just picked up, and (to quote my 10 year old) yeeted. The whole plot of the movie is that Annie's character, Gloria, is heading back home after her boyfriend kicks her out because she's struggling to stay sober. She meets her childhood friend, Oscar played by the handsome and charming J Suds, who now runs his late father's bar. He gives her a job which aggravates her alcoholism, she stays up late, sleeps til late, and at the same time there's a giant reptilian monster causing death and destruction in Seoul. There's a specific time in the morning that Gloria walks through the certain spot in the park and she realizes she can remotely control the monster in Seoul. But vice versa, when the monster gets attacked, Gloria gets hurt. She tries to spell out an apology and fix her behavior to make the monster less destructive. Then Oscar manifests a monster of his own, which is a giant robot, and his behavior becomes more destructive towards his friends, and specifically Gloria, he tries to force her to drink knowing she has problems, her NY boyfriend finds her to take her back and Oscar tries to get her to stay. Oscar doesn't like himself at all so he manipulates other people and manifested a robot to make himself feel important. In the playground where they can control their monsters, because Gloria wont stay, Oscar begins to purposefully make his robot stomp on buildings in Seoul and tells Gloria that every day she's not with him, he'll continue to rampage. Gloria's smart and wants to know if she can reverse the charges, so she takes a trip to Seoul waits until it's time and the robot manifests, and while she is there, back home where Oscar is having a temper tantrum, the giant reptile appears and she scoops him up and just flings him. AND THAT is why, a man who was paid to kill people and loved his job, and carried an ear around in his pocket, was a much nicer person than fucking Oscar 🤣 Jason: I get it. I get the same when I see Liz every day I have to pinch myself to check I'm not dreaming, but she really is my beautiful wife and this really is my beautiful house.

Eiza: if he never crows? Even better, he’ll be the most ironic rooster in existence. Sweet Bill is home!! My heart is full. I love that Yogi is cool with it, but I knew the goats would be the troublemakers. They’ve been plotting something since day one, and I fully support their mischief. I’m ready for this wholesome-yet-chaotic farm docuseries. Eiza: Okay, but hurled into the sun?? That’s next-level karmic justice, and I’m absolutely here for it. Imagine being so awful that the only solution is to yeet you into space. Also, I need you to explain how you once played a guy who carried a human ear in his pocket and he wasn’t as bad as Oscar?? That’s truly saying something. Eiza: I do believe her. I really do. It’s just wild, you know? Like, my brain still short-circuits a little when I think about it. But hearing it from you too? That means everything. I’ll take the hill next to yours, and we’ll both defend it till the end. Eiza: I think we can call ourselves grown ups now 😂

[sudcikis]

Jason: I've got just a couple of days of being busy, I'm in California until Friday but my nights are mostly free, and then I'm heading out to KC for the weekend. If you're free any time in the immediate future, I would love to hang out 😏 Jason: That was not the emoji I wanted to use gosh darn it it was supposed to be 😊 I'm just going to go crawl into a hole now it was nice knowing you

@famelail

[sudcikis]

Jason: I have to tell you something urgently 🚨 Jason: Hello and everything by the way @anadarmcs

[sudcikis]

📲 Hannah Banana

J: Just watched my children fly back to LA so I'm officially miserable again 🙃 J: So, if I ask you if you're going on the Disney trip and you say you're not, I'm going to turn absolutely monstrous 💔 Please tell me you are? @famehannahwads

[sudcikis]

@killa--trav (cont.) Jason: I'm great thanks pal, I can't complain. Between working and farm life, it's all good. Good and as healthy as can be with the winter bugs. Jason: You did! I'll say it, I don't give a shit 🤣 You got the shorts, socks and sandals combo ready? Practicing your dad jokes? You're gonna love it. I'll be honest with you Jason: I hit every movie stereotype: First of all it was a long labor, then I almost missed the birth, and while he was being delivered I fainted... HOWEVER, when they're here and you have them so tiny and new, and you take care of them, and teach them, play with them. Golly, it's the best feeling in the world. There is nothing in my life I love more than being a father. It's scary sometimes, you'll get things wrong, but don't beat yourself up about those things, because you're new too y'know? Y'all have the rest of your lives together, you're not going to be perfect 100% of those days and it's okay.

[sudcikis]

[text] Sh don't ruin my perfect cat like ability moment now with explanations. Well yeah else we will be doomed the whole rest of the year, you know that? and no one wants to see us doomed.

[ sms ] will you eat grapes with me under the table?

[sudcikis]

[text] You dont know how sexy you are right now and that is sexy too.

[ sms ] Are you perving on me across the room again, Goldberg? You wanna make out at midnight?

[sudcikis]

Jason: Why are you crying about it? Jason: I was actually super curious about the vegetable thing; What do you mean? 🤣 Well, I guess I'm supposed to say something like margarita right, but my drink of choice would be an old fashioned and it can be improved with a little salt.

Hunter: First off, let me just get the embarrassing part out of the way by admitting I watch Ted Lasso and cry at night, just because. ~ Hunter: So clearly I'm crying just getting a swipe from you. But in your honor it's with my favorite "believe" hoodie but I'll let you pick which drink I'm having to compliment the taste of salt. And then we can have them together.

[sudcikis]

[text] there's no place i'd rather be than by your side to celebrate you darling

[ text ] I love you ❤️ Thank you. I wouldn't want anyone else by my side, Wadders.

[sudcikis]

[ text ] : happy birthday, u wonderful human ! glad u exist, even more glad ur lady does 😉 ( kidding but also not, hope today is as fun as u are to be around)

[ SMS ] Oh believe me that feeling is mutual. Thank you so much Ari! And Thank you for coming to the party, it was great to see you 🩵

[sudcikis]

[text] Happy Birthday to a real one! Have a great day, buddy.

[ SMS ] Thanks brother. Great to hear from you! All the best for Monday's game ❤️💛 💪🏼

[sudcikis]

[text] very sad i didn't get to see you for my birthday looking forward to you making up to me xx

[ SMS ] Rest assured it was the date that got away from me, but you were not forgotten. I'm so, so sorry ❤️

[sudcikis]

[text: @jujutemplefms] the chances of Jason being at work? 2%

[text] the chances of Jason being at a basketball game? 100%

[text] cheeky bastard buy me a jersey yeah?

[ sms ] 😇 [ sms ]

[ sms ] Indiana Fever, yeah? 😉

[sudcikis]

[text] is that your way to tell the world you had sex?

[ SMS ] It wasn't. But since you asked... 🤗

[sudcikis]

I can do that. My voice notes are quite notorious for being so long so if you would like me to read out a fifty page essay about why you're a boss-ass bitch and you're going to do amazing things every day, I can absolutely do that. It does sound so fun! I'm so happy that you got to experience that. I have never done anything like that; I got to run through a busy street in Puerto Rico with a harpoon. That's probably about as much action as my career has given me. Unless you count that one scene in Ted Lasso where I smashed my head on a door frame for real and had to get my head glued back together because I have no spacial awareness.

hey, hey, hey! do you want to be my daily alarm? you could send me a voice note with that phrase and it will be a great motivation. now wait until you watch the movie, i had a LOT of fun, it was insane how a great time I had filming. I hope I get to make more action movies. I've recently wrapped a spy film so it was a little close. I don't know how I do it, I think it's because I don't like to do the same kind of characters, i tend to get bored so i try to pick different kind of characters. you are going to be when you grow, I'm sure! you can even write your own characters!

[sudcikis]

Jason: I was up and down on it for a while. I wasn't sure if it was weird, but truly, you are such an important person in my life, and you have been by my side through the good, the bad, and the questionable and I couldn't picture a scenario where you weren't by my side as I embark on this new chapter. I'm so excited, nerves haven't kicked in yet, I'm just so ready to be married to this girl, I love her so much. Maybe on the day I'll start bricking it, but right now I'm okay.

Ana: I was not prepared to get THIS emotional but leave it to you for making me all fuzzy. I would be honored to be part of your day, Jay. Thank you so much, it truly means the world. How are you feeling?? Gosh, you're getting married. I'm so fucking happy for you. / @sudcikis