#𝐢𝐯. 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞. ——— pre canon.

[lindscys]

𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬   →   accepting.

@huntedvideo​​​​ : ❛  you were going to leave without saying goodbye?  ❜

the duffle bag stuffed with her belongings fell to the floor at the sound of fin’s question. it was to be anticipated, though erin had hoped that she might have been able to make a getaway before anyone had realised where she had gone to. “what did you expect?” she asked, turning back towards him. she did her best to hold it together, though there was no denying the guilt, the sadness in her eyes.

“i don’t have a choice.” at least, that’s how it had been presented to her. countless arrests under her belt for an assortment of different things, and a second chance that she’d all but thrown away. she’d been taken in by the voight family as a last chance saloon, and she’d stuck it out for a while before running away again. but that was the problem with living under the roof of a cop –– they could always find you. and he had done, convincing her to return to his care once again. 

“they’re going to send me to juvie if i don’t go back with them.” at least that was true. the initial offer had been to be taken in by hank and camille, have a chance at a better life, and avoid juvie. it had worked, for a while, until erin had decided she was done with it and run away. now the threat was back on the table, and frankly living in a nice house with a good family was better than the alternative. juvie. “i’ll come and see ya.” but even she knew that she couldn’t guarantee that promise.

[lindscys]

finley had been part of the reason she'd actually managed to survive this long. long enough for voight and camille to decide that perhaps they wanted to take a chance on her, save her from her mother, and give her a chance that maybe she might be able to turn things around. she felt as though she owed him, as much as she owed them for the opportunity. the thought that he might not be around as much, that things wouldn't be the same, was what prompted the quiet tears that dared to roll down her cheeks. if she had it her way, she'd try and have voight build another room for finley, too. pull the both of them out of the lives they'd come to know, and give them both the chance. and she wouldn't be able to ignore the guilt that sat within her knowing that for the first time in the entire time they'd known one another, they weren't quite the same.

"i'll tell him." there was a slight laugh to her words –– the truth that he spoke about voight prompting the quiet chuckle from her soft words. "hey, he might even get you round for dinner once i show him i can follow his rules." it was a long shot, but still a thought she'd like to hold on to. hope. something she hadn't had in a long time, and despite everything that said otherwise, there was still a somewhat naive side to erin that said that perhaps it would all work out. "i will be good. i can't let camille down." despite living under the roof of a police officer, it was his wife that had the worst look of disappointment when boundaries were crossed. one she wanted to avoid, if she could.

"we'll be in contact all the time." though, even she didn't know whether she could believe her own words. it was what she'd hold on to, at least for a little while. "and if i can figure out the computer lab at my new fancy school, we might even be able to email." hopeful words, though erin's distaste for anything technological didn't hold out a lot of hope for her learning how to use it. "perhaps letters are the safer option." a hand brushed at her wet cheeks, drying them with the cuff of her sleeve. "okay, okay, i'm not crying any more. it'll be fine. it's not forever."

whatever finley said next, it would be a lie. he wasn't going to stay. he couldn't stay. unlike erin, he didn't have a family to stay with, here ( adoptive or otherwise ). his mom was dead, and he was still looking for his father, lost to some void that fin was desperate to look into. he had a purpose. the only reason he had stayed here this long was because he had erin - someone she had grown attached to, someone who ran around with him and got into trouble. that's all he was, trouble. now stricter rules were being brought down upon her, and fin knew he couldn't drag her down any longer. there were more factors in play than just the two of them, and he had decided to leave as soon as he realized how much better off she could be without him. finley wouldn't say that. erin was already crying, and he didn't want to give her more reason to grieve.

'you'll see me again,' it's somewhat of a deflection. it could be true - he never knows when he'll come back around to a town he'd already been to. then again, fin also never knows where he might end up. he could get stuck somewhere, or die doing what he's been doing. but he didn't want to take away the hope between them. she's the first person he's trusted in a long time, the first person he's befriended and allowed to see the scared boy who just wanted his dad back. right now, he looks stoic, because he has to be for her, but the truth was that he was going to miss her. he hopes she knows that this was the hardest decision he's ever had to make. and he hopes she wouldn't be too disappointed in him when she realizes fin decided to run.

leaning away, he wipes away the mist in his own eyes, refusing to cry in this moment. he wanted them to be happy, despite the lingering knowledge that this could be the last time they see each other. 'tell voight i said bye. i'm aware he doesn't like me very much, but hey - he's a good dude, and i appreciate what he's done for you,' watery grin is given, hand raising again to brush a strand of hair from erin's wet cheek. 'i'll call you. or we'll write - everything's gonna be fine, okay?' he dips his head, makes sure she looks him in the eyes. 'promise me you'll be good. i don't want you behind bars the next time i see you,'

[lindscys]

𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫   →   accepting.

@lieutenantkidd​ : ❛  i’m  too  stupid  for  identity  theft  &  you  know  that .  ❜

“you might be right about that one.” erin couldn’t help but laugh as she thought about it - she and stella weren’t going to easily pass as other people, much less the kind of women that carried the kind of credit card she held in her hand. “worth asking though. i can’t do it either - there’s too much on my police record already.” a record that she was going to have to one day defend if she was going to attempt to join cpd, which she was being encouraged to do. whether she would or not, she didn’t know. “what else do you suggest? because my mug shot really doesn’t need to be updated if i can help it, so whatever we wanna do, we can’t wind up arrested.”

[bannannie]

hiding out hadn't really been her plan, but annie wasn't sure what else to do. turning to her parents wasn't an option, and beth was off with dean living their marital bliss life. and here she was, fighting off a stomach bug yet again, despite however many weeks it had been going on for. she knew it wasn't just something she'd eaten, far too scared to face the reality of the situation. a pregnant high schooler from a tricky upbringing felt too cliche, even for her. it was far easier to manage being some sort of stomach flu.

"shit." was that too blunt of a response? maeve was being nice to her, she didn't deserve to be on the end of annie's tiredness, of her fear as to what was growing inside of her. "do you have any water?" she asked, eyes softening. hands fiddled with one another in front of her, just grateful to not be there alone like she had been. "i think i'm in trouble." she confessed, words barely louder than a whisper.

 ❝   will you stay with me?   ❞

 she’s not good at people   -    or,    more precisely,    maeve isn’t good at being what they want or need from her outside of academia.    people are so much trickier than books:    less forgiving,    full to the brim with subtext written in too many languages to make sense.   (   she sees them.   reads them just fine.   something still gets lost in translation,   not coming to her lips in the way maeve means the sentiments.   )    teenager is already a mix of too advanced   -   working on a degree,   spending most of year surrounded by those so much older   -   and already feeling miles behind. 

@bannannie​ hardly seems well and textbooks whisper in the back of her mind that she knows without being told what is making other girl sick.

 ❝   do you need some crackers or water?    they’re meant to help with   -   bugs.   ❞    it had been a bug other had blamed it upon,    wasn’t it?    brunette is barely sure,    yet still she follows request,    sinking down to sit on the floor opposite her.    ❝   how are you feeling?   ❞

[lindscys]

erin knew that at some point, she had to make a change. she'd thought that she might be the person to make that decision for herself, but the present circumstances meant that she didn't have a choice. she couldn't go to juvie, so she'd have to take the alternative. an alternative that might, for the first time in her life, provide her with some actual stability. that was what she'd been told anyway –– she didn't hold out that much hope for it, though. but she knew she owed it to the voight's to at least try. they'd done so much even just offering her a place to stay with them, given they knew all of her history. it didn't make leaving finley behind any easier though. pulled together through circumstance, sticking together through choice. it was almost cruel that the universe was only giving her the way out.

"yeah, okay. you're only okay because of me, remember." she said, tears still rolling down her cheeks despite her best efforts at keeping them at bay. she was grateful in that moment that she and @huntedvideo were tight in an embrace, so that he couldn't see just how many lost the fight against gravity. "it's not like i'm moving to australia or anything. i'll still be –– around." but a new school, boundaries, the threat of juvie if she didn't abide by the rules set, meant that around would likely be far less than she wanted. she could try and convince them both otherwise, but she didn't want to be the cause of any more disappointment. for either of them.

"nah, i'll forget all about you by the time i put on that new school uniform." her own hand wiped at her cheek, as if to make sure fin had wiped them all away. there was a small smile, bravely putting it on as if too scared not to. "don't go away, okay? don't –– just because i'm not around all the time doesn't mean i'm gone. i'm still kind of here, i'm still me." some things couldn't change. she wasn't convinced that she could. "don't want to find out you moved to florida or something because i wasn't here to talk you out of it. i might not forgive you if you did."

he's lost a lot of people. either to death or with the way he was always leaving, or being left. as young as he was, finley shouldn't have had to experience this much loss. he's aware of that. but he can't dwell on it. the longer he thinks about the family and friends and loved ones that no longer belonged to him, for one reason or another, the more he realized how little he had to live for. the search for his father was really the only thing that kept fin going. on and on, on tired feet. youth doesn't seem to touch him, anymore, despite young features. he's matured far too much for how few years he's been alive. that's why, he thinks, he got so attached to erin. she's the same as him - too much exhaustion in such a short life. but she still has a chance. finley knows he doesn't. and that's why he needs to walk away.

' me? pft. you know i'll be fine. just like i always am, ' arms constrict a bit tighter around her, cheek laying against the top of erin's head, his eyes closed as he takes in the last of her closeness. he knows he won't see her again for a long time. but despite knowing that, he lies. ' yeah. yeah, y'know we'll keep in touch. i gotta make sure you're staying in line, ' the boy chuckles, giving her one last squeeze before he pulls away. one hand reaches up to wipe away erin's tears with the sleeve of his hoodie. ' i'm gonna miss you. you're gonna miss me, right? ' in spite of the goodbye, finley gives erin a smile, as if he's teasing her. @lindscys / cont.