#𓂅 ˖ ࣪ 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 | troye.

[nickjcnas-archived]

𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐔𝐏 𝐎𝐍 𝐔𝐒 ⇢ 𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒚𝒆.

After spending a few days in the mountains with Joe, Nick had felt good enough about where he was at with himself to go surprise Troye in Australia. He had no intentions of even going there to begin with because of how rough things had been between the couple lately, but he knew it was what he had to do in order to fix things. In order to make sure Troye knew that he wanted to fix things. However, he also knew there was no way he would’ve been able to make it there without spending the time that he did with his brother. Clearing his head was exactly what he needed, to get away from the stressors of his everyday life, vent to Joe, and let everything out. ‘Brother therapy’ is what Joe had called it a few days ago and it was wholeheartedly the truth. Because now, Nick could approach Troye with a clear mind and a bit more confidence than he had previously.

Nick arrived home on Friday afternoon in order to check on the dogs and a few work-related things that needed tending to. He wouldn’t be there very long until he was on a one-way flight to Melbourne. Of course, he made sure someone could stay behind and take care of the dogs while he was gone because he wasn’t sure how long he was going to be. Which made him all the more nervous because would Troye even want him to stay? Nick had no intentions of leaving the country until it was time to for work, but for now, it seemed appropriate that it was only for one-way. If things didn’t work out the way he was hoping they would, then it wouldn’t be any trouble to book another flight back home. Before he knew it, Nick was on a private jet to Melbourne with the new puppy in tow for a grueling fifteen hours. In his own little world, it seemed like weeks, because of how much he’d been anticipating to see his boyfriend. But he knew it wouldn’t be long before they were reunited again. He had slept for the most part of the flight to pass the time, unless Lyric required his attention. Other than that, he knew he’d need the sleep to prepare for whatever he was about to walk into.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the plane landed and the musician was well on his way to the house he knew like the back of his hand already, even if he hadn’t visited before. The house numbers etched permanently in his brain as the rental car drove him to Troye’s luxurious home. It was beautiful, exactly what he had imagined it to look like, completely in his boyfriend’s taste. Nick pulled the car up to the curbside, wanting to avoid being possibly seen pulling into the driveway. He wanted it to be a surprise, after-all. “Well, Lyric, let’s go do this, shall we?” He spoke to the dog, ruffling his soft fur between his fingers and allowing a soft chuckle to escape from his lips the second the puppy jumped into his lap. Without stalling anymore than he already had, Nick picked Lyric up into his arms and exited the vehicle, then made his way up the long driveway and eventually the pathway that led to the front door. He fished for the key Troye had given him for Christmas in his pocket and once it was finally retrieved, he slid it into the socket, unlocking the door with a clicking noise. He pushed the door open and he noticed it was rather quiet inside as he set the puppy down on the floor to check out his surroundings. “Go surprise him, baby. I know he’s probably dying to see you.” The second Nick said this, Lyric ran off to God knows where, but the musician decided to stay behind in hopes that Troye would be so confused as to how their puppy ended up all the way in Melbourne, so he’d have to do some investigating. Nick stepped inside and shut the door behind him quietly, then leaned back against the wooden frame with his arms crossed over his chest -- waiting for the moment they the couple would finally be reunited with one another. // @troooye

[nickjcnas-archived]

𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐔𝐏 𝐎𝐍 𝐔𝐒 ⇢ 𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒚𝒆.

troooye:

Troye was at home, in Melbourne, the home he knew so well, and yet he still felt lost within its walls. He had reunited with his family, spent days with his sister as his house mate, and he still felt alone. It was like everything was the opposite of what he had known it to be. He tossed and turned in his slumber that night, wondering if he should pick up his phone and dial Nick’s number nearly every other passing hour. It got to the point where fingers hovered over his contact, but never once pressed down on the touch screen to initiate the call. He closed his heavy eyes, hoping fonder memories would lull him to sleep. Morning broke before he could get much sleep, thoughts running miles in circles around his head, what he could have done or should have said the last moment he was with Nick back in California. The summer sun was peeking though the shades, and Troye sat in a dark room under covers. He wondered when he would even see his boyfriend again, whether or not the opportunity of space he’d given him would stretch too far, to the point where Nick figured out he was better off. 

He pulled himself out of bed by midday. Imaginary, heartbreaking scenarios played like a film behind his eyes each time he had tried to doze off. He dragged his feet across the floor to the bathroom, hardly recognizing himself in the mirror. And maybe he was dramatic, but everything felt so different without Nick. Everything felt mismatched, like nothing made sense without him by his side. They’d been so inseparable, leaving things broken apart countries away from each other took a decent toll on him. It was the first time he made an effort since arriving home, putting self care on the back burner. He decided to run a bath, hoping that sinking under the warmth of the water under a sea of bubbles would help him clear his mind. He could’ve stayed in the spot until his skin pruned, but decided to carry on with his day while he was ahead, draining the tub and metaphorically picturing his worries going down with the water. He put on a playlist while he dressed himself, but not before gazing at the last text he sent to Nick, refraining himself from sending another as he peeked through his wardrobe. He left his bedroom for the first time in what felt like ages, although he had clearly lost track of time. As he reached the second floor of the house, he looked over and out towards the courtyard, debating on treating himself to fresh air. He went outside and tended to the plants, deciding to sit out and let the sun kiss his skin. 

He put in his headphones and took himself to another world, one where he hadn’t let things head south, one where he had put Nick’s feelings before his own. It had distracted him enough to not notice someone enter his home on the opposite side of the house, but not enough to drown out the clanging sound of metal dog tags. He turned the volume down further as he sat up, head turned to discover where it was coming from. He set down his phone and went to investigate, calling out to anyone who might be willing to make their presence known. “Sage?” He questioned, but was met with nothing in return. It was then Lyric heard his voice and ran around the corner to meet him, and Troye almost instantly felt like he was seeing things, far too sleep deprived to make out reality. “Baby, where did you—“ he started excitedly, bringing the puppy up into his arms, who wasted no time in licking his face as his tail wagged manically. He carried him tight to his chest as he walked back into his home, into the living area. It all added up in his head as he saw Nick. He walked the distance between where he stood to his boyfriend, setting Lyric down on the floor to roam as he practically flung himself into Nick’s arms. He wrapped his arms around his neck, clinging onto him like he was on the next plane back out to America. 

“I’m so sorry, Nick,” he had said in a hushed tone against his ear, the first genuine apology he was able to get out in person without it being lost in the heat of a fight, the first words to fill the air. “I shouldn’t have left without you, before we were okay again. I shouldn’t have done any of that.” His voice sounded broken, but he rambled on, his heartbeat thumping fast as he pulled away to look him in his eyes. Things were different than they were the night things became rocky — now, he felt regret, completely remorseful over any hurt and toxicity he brought back to the forefront with Nick. He hated the way he so freely flirted with another man, accepting his advances and purposefully adding fuel to the fire as Nick watched, taunting him like it was a sick game, all for his own benefit. “I know it won’t erase what happened, what was done and what was said, but I’ll be better. For you, for us.” Troye remembered the last text he’d sent, that Nick thought everything had been an excuse. He believed his words, and wanted Nick to believe them, too. “Please… stay,” the word was deja vu as soon as it fell from his lips, the last word he uttered as he cried against the brick wall on the grounds of Emerald Lake, the camping trip that solidified the desire to be Nick’s. “I want you here with me.”

The fact that it all took under five minutes for Troye to find out Nick had surprised him by showing up, wasn’t surprising in the least bit. It was the look of sheer relief on his boyfriend’s face when their eyes finally locked on one another from a distance. It didn’t take much longer for Troye to set the puppy down and close the distance between them, Nick instantly securing his arms around his much smaller frame to show that he wanted him in his arms just as much. That he was craving his touch. Nick shut his eyes, listening intently to what Troye had to say. He wasn’t going to speak over him and say what he needed to say until he was finished. Their embrace was then broken so that they could lock eyes once more, except all Nick wanted to do was caress his lover’s face with his hand — letting him know that he was still listening to everything he had to say. Even the musician’s own eyes had began to water with the slightest bit of tears. Tears of exhaustion and relief, he was sure of it.

The last words that were spoken, it was like Nick was thrown through a time warp — back in time to the celebrity camping trip back in late summer at Emerald Lake the year before. Nick remembered the exact words exchanged between them that hot summer night, the way the musician pleaded for Troye to stop pushing him away, the way he dried his tears before they found themselves in a heated embrace against the brick wall with one another, refusing to let go. A comfortable silence washed over them after Troye had finished speaking, Nick then taking his face into his hand delicately so he could finally say what he needed to say. “I’m right here, baby,” he said, first and foremost. Mostly because Nick knew Troye needed the reassurance. “I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere,” Nick reassured him one more time that he wasn’t going anywhere, just so his boyfriend could find comfort in the fact that he planned on staying for a while. “I was hurt, but I’ll be okay. We’ll be okay. And I know we will be because I forgive you. I know it wasn’t your intention to hurt me, but I just want you to know that you don’t have to do things like that to get my attention, okay? You’ve always got it, Troye. Whenever you’re in the same room with me and it’s a room full of people, everyone else just fades away. You’re the only person I see. It’s just you and I. Nobody else, baby. I promise you that.”

“I needed to spend time with Joe and clear my head before coming to see you. Coming back home with you has never been out of the question, you know I’ve always wanted to. I don’t want you to think for a second that I never wanted to be here,” Nick said, recalling back on the last text messages that they had exchanged — Troye being worried that Nick didn’t even want to come home with him at all. “It just wasn’t the right time when you had dropped it on me that you were leaving. Things were too tense between us for me to follow you blindly here. I’m glad Joe basically kidnapped me so he could help me clear my head, otherwise, I don’t think I would’ve been able to approach you the way I wanted to,” he admitted, figuring honesty was the way to go right now. Funny how Nick had always had trouble being vulnerable and talking about his feelings, but all it took was a break from reality for a few days with his best friend to set him on the right path again. “And I’m sorry if there was anything I said in the heat of the moment that hurt you, as well. God, I’m so fucking sorry.”