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beloved-calypso · 6 months ago

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・ ° ʚɞ ゜𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝖎𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖊𝖞𝖊𝖘 𝖔𝖋 𝖞𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖘 ~ ♡ ・゜ ʚɞ ゜゜‎♡‧₊˚✧ ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა ✧˚₊‧♡

♡𝒮𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝑜𝓌𝑒𝓇𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝓁𝒶𝓈𝒽𝑒𝓈 𝓊𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓁 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝒶𝓁𝓂𝑜𝓈𝓉 𝒸𝓊𝒹𝒹𝓁𝑒𝒹 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒸𝒽𝑒𝑒𝓀𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓈𝓁𝑜𝓌𝓁𝓎 𝓇𝒶𝒾𝓈𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓂 𝒶𝑔𝒶𝒾𝓃, 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝒶 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓉𝓇𝑒 𝒸𝓊𝓇𝓉𝒶𝒾𝓃. 𝐼 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓉𝓇𝒾𝒸𝓀. 𝒯𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝓈𝓊𝓅𝓅𝑜𝓈𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝒶𝓀𝑒 𝓂𝑒 𝓇𝑜𝓁𝓁 𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓇 𝑜𝓃 𝓂𝓎 𝒷𝒶𝒸𝓀 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓅𝒶𝓌𝓈 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒶𝒾𝓇.” – 𝑅𝒶𝓎𝓂𝑜𝓃𝒹 𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓃𝒹𝓁𝑒𝓇♡

All pictures and gifs are not mine but belong to their original artists. ♡

I. -> II. -> III. -> IIII.

[Note: Hello, everyone! If you didn't guess it, this pac is about how you are viewed by your past, present, and future lovers. This pick a card was originally about 'how' you are as a lover but turned out to be about girl power theme so I went with the flow ~ I have another pick a card coming out soon this week so stay tuned!

Edit 8/18: People of pile 4 please check over your reading again. I added some stuff. Also pile 3 although it wasn't significant. I couldn't help but to keep editing mistakes here and there so apologies if you keep getting notifications of changes for this post 😂.]

~ XOXO 💋🎀

౿��꒰ྀི The Lyre ๑◞꒱ა

[The Moon, 3 of Cups, The Star]

You are a mystical and overwhelming lover pile 1 😘. You feed people the energy and will they need to feel alive. You're like an aphrodisiac and your lovers like to get high purely off of you. You make people feel like they NEED you. CRAVE you. It's almost like your partner's ache to breathe the air you do, envelope themselves around you, and stay around you all the time because they want to make sure you weren't a figment of their imagination. Some people have thought you walked straight out of their daydreams. They are addicted to your energy and presence and desire so much from you. Don't think of it as people stealing your energy though; your feeding off of theirs too. This is a proverbial yin and yang, a give and take with you holding the scales of power like the effigy of Lady Justice. You're consuming at the same time you're giving. It could claim to be vampiric, but it comes off as dreamy and mysterious. You're moreso like a fairy or sprite enticing someone to follow them in the woods with a beckoning finger and a mischievous smile. Fairy's in early storybooks are mostly tricksters and little devils, but they are so beautiful and enchanting at the same time. There's a reason they cannot escape the human consciousness. You give off the air of springtime, of misty nights at waterfalls and flower strewn glens dappled with dawning sunlight. 🌸

You're a comfort as well as seductress, playing the Madonna when you need to set a lure and revealing the whore once you've sinked your claws into your prey. You're wholesome yet strange, animated yet withdrawn, spontaneous yet quite, the constant swing of a pendulum that pushes and pulls, push and pull, push and pull. You're the exact type who can have anyone and everyone wrapped around their fingers. When you're outside you're a nymph in her natural habitat. When you're indoors you're an enchantress in her home brewing potions and scribbling spells. Both paint a pretty and sensuous picture. You can play the whimsical and silly girl, but you're anything but dumb. While sniffing at that flower you picked up in the meadows you're locked onto your target with discerning eyes, sizing them up like a hawk ready to pluck a mouse from the fields. You're someone who can lure in their target with an innocent face and a flower crown on their hair, speaking honeyed words with opened palms, and when your lover finally settles down next to you, you can embrace and look down upon them with a loving gaze all the while knowing they are hopelessly trapped by you, and they couldn't be more unaware of it. You give them the notion of having power over you, a false sense of comfort you can utilize to take everything you want from of them. It's a perfectly painless process and that's why it works. This is a siren evolved out of water, a woman with the crime of passion trailing behind her like a cape and the undeceptive eyes of a doe. It's giving me Persephone and Hades, a gentle and lively woman able to tame even the darkest and stony of hearts, meaning you can seduce just about anyone!

You're a lover that is exciting and addicting to be around, a drug without the side effects. I think you can be the caring mother men need to be vulnerable, and when they need the heat to turn up, out comes the sultry woman of their dreams. I feel you could be into baking, maybe catering for home events and shoving food in people's mouths as a sign of love (it's also a tactic predators use in the wild to make their target immobilized). I think you like to do anything that relaxes and distresses you, keep in the quiet and just let your mind go into the silence. You are wonderfully sublime, an aromatic mix of shadow and light. You look like you stepped out of a Renaissance painting. I think you like creature comforts, the feel of a soft leathery couch and the low noise of a tv. Other days it's the grass at your back and the wind sweeping over your body that delights you. There's a number of things you want to try and have already done that feeds your spirit of whimsiness. Keep being silly and adventurous. Don't stumble trying to appear as someone you're not. You're open and free and that's what's so enticing about you. It doesn't ward people off as much as you think, rather it just intimidates people that don't have the same confidence as you do to exercise their self-expression. Many people struggle with their identity but you embrace it and the changes that life brings and so you're actually above those that you think you're beneath. You're constantly evolving and constantly at the whim of fate. I would say you're a breath of fresh air to anyone you meet. Never deny your power. This piles energy is very airy, light, and aligned with the sense of smell, which can be just as seductive as touch. Follow the direction of the wind and you'll always be on course for everything you desire. You're meant to wander and ponder. Don't think you're not meeting goal-posts as fast as everyone else. You're just enjoying what lies along the journey rather then the end, and that's a beautiful thing more fulfilling than crossing the finish line. ~

⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧

౿૮꒰ྀི The Tiger ๑◞꒱ა

[Ace of Cups, 6 of Swords, Wheel of Fortune]

Hello pile 2, aren't you the busy body. You are so energetic and strong. You have the strength and will of a lioness, a woman mature, self-sufficient, and unstoppable. I see you working yourself to the bone trying to keep a whole house together and not breaking a sweat while doing so. I doubt many work as hard as you do. They may not even measure to your strength of will. I'm getting a vision of Princess Tiana from Princess and the Frog, a Capricorn who was intelligent, diligent, and fearless. You are just like her I'm hearing. You're the glue that holds things together, that makes something new out of two separate things, the source of support that keeps someone afloat and moving. Without you your lovers would sink into the mires of lament and stupidity.

You're a trophy wife that doesn't just sit in the house all day but keeps upgrading the house, from a one-story, to a manor, to a whole estate. You're lovers are forced to match your speed and make something of themselves. You envigorate them with the promises of success. You're like a lucky lady in poker; your lovers can't win without you. You're their real success, the one trophy in their case made out of real gold. They grow with you, build a life with you, take their crudy dreams and turn it into a reality. You have the golden Midas touch. ✨ You're like magic, a Djinn that grants wishes and turns dreams to truth. Sure, in the real world these things take time and work, but they happen. Anything and everything can happen for you, and in extension, to your lovers. Your lovers need you in order to survive, to reach their goals and dreams and feel on top of the world. You're like the blood rushing through their veins in adrenaline on a morning run, the caffeine in their coffee, the motor of their car that never fails, and the bed they come home to and sink in. These things seems mundane but they are all a necessity of life. They signify movement, comfort, and stability. Excitement is fun every now and then but in real life it's not an everyday thing nor is it practical. You're a reminder of what's real and of what reward is past the finish line. You're the mast on a ship, the strings that hold everything together. You have the backbone of metal but you still hold the delicacy of something precious and nurturing. You have a very motherly aura. I feel you can't help but to take care of people. It's in your nature to help and nurture things into growing. You're a catalyst for change, sometimes the broom that swats someone's hiny into action. I see you guzzling coffee and turning into a tornado of movement. I'm also seeing big cats in the wild. Jaguars, panthers, leopards, and tigers, all fierce and spirited animals reflective of the ferocity of women and the power we all hold within. You know, lionesses and other female big cats do most of the work in keeping their species alive. They're protectors, hunters, warriors, and mothers. They do more than their mates and they do it all looking exquisite and beautiful. Everything about them is ingrained into you. Believe that.

Your strength is unparalleled and there's something that's so wild about you, something begging to be free, a intensity and ferociousness that can knock any man down and force them underneath you. I'm seeing leopard prints, blood, and fangs. You need to let that animal in you out every once in a while, take her out for a walk on the town and dom that red lipstick and little black dress you were saving for a special occasion. She's what's been clawing your insides and she will not rest until you let her breathe. I wouldn't be surprised if your partners like riling you up. Your anger is absolutely sexy. When tempers fly they feel a primal rush going on, a need to let your animals meet *wink, wink*. I feel you display both civility and the inner animal brain all of us humans have. It's astonishing how much we suppress ourselves and call our primal natures uncivilized and obsolete. They are not something to do away with, and anyone that says otherwise is lying to themselves. Suppressing our animal instincts teaches suppression and breeds inner deviancy. Releasing our instincts allows our bodies to give you their full capabilities. That's what your lovers see in you: a powerful woman that doesn't lie to herself and embraces her very nature and channels it into creation. That's why you succeed in everything. You're not afraid to get messy and tear a few muscles. You're a wild cat in heels welding a knife with a little blood on her apron. You're a little crazy but that's what makes people equally wild about you. It's sometimes better to be feared than loved, but in your case the things go hand in hand. Fear releases adrenaline and sometimes triggers the horny parts of our brains. Men are scared of you and piss their pants a little, but they kind of like it. Just know that it's ok to be vulnerable and soft once in a while. Just like Tiana, you will have to learn to relax and know it's ok to have days where you do nothing. You're not an incomplete person, and you are far from undesirable, but you're busy-bee nature makes your lovers want to take you by the shoulders and hog-tie you down to a chair. Deep down beneath that impenetrable armor is a woman desiring tenderness and affection, and you need to water her regularly to keep her from wilting. It's not a show of weakness to be vulnerable. I received another perfect metaphor for you, a diamond, strong and beautiful and the King of gems. Remember how diamonds are made; they come from the common material of carbon undergoing extreme pressures and heat to become something priceless and wanted by all. Perfectly descriptive of you. Remember that you are a diamond among gemstones, rare and desirable above all else. ~

⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧

౿૮꒰ྀི The Shells and the Vase ๑◞꒱ა

[Ace of Swords, King of Swords, 7 of Pentacles]

With you pile 3, it's do or die. You don't wait for no one nor are you adept at wasting your time with just anyone. You carry yourself as a woman with high value and as though you have a lot to offer, which you most definitely do. You're sexy, but there's also something inside you that adds to this appeal; your intelligence. Your appearance is beautiful too, but we will get into that later. You're sharp witted and unbelievably smart. Your highly praised for your genius and some can see that that is what gives you your unshakeable confidence. I feel you know the nature of people very well and you could be a fantastic conversationalist. People would pay to hear you talk for hours on hours. It's the way you talk, the way your tongue rolls and twitches between your lips that keeps them hanging onto every word you utter. Even the sounds you make are lip-bitingly arousing. Your lovers love the talks you have and they feel they can tell you everything and anything, but they'd rather just cuddle and hear you speak. There's never a dull moment with you and you open their eyes to the Universe. You're a point of discovery and through you people gain invaluable information. You're brilliant, knowledgeable and a master of words, but you're very selective with who you speak too. Not everyone is deserving of your words and sometimes people are so easy you can't help but to play a few mind games with them just to ease the edge of boredom you feel around normies. You may have an intriguing accent, even if it sounds normal to you, there's something about it so refined and soothing. Any of you bilinguals by chance? There's a neat little library in your head full of information that you can pull out when the time is perfect. You know when to turn on the crowd-pleaser and the show-stopper and even the dim-wit when you feel like effing with people. You're immune to caring what others think of you (a superpower if you ask me) and when you're slighted you may think it's funny. A good verbal joust is healthy from time to time, and a fight with words is much more interesting than with fists. I sense a little mean streak within this pile hehehe. Intelligence is so sensual. Ever heard of the phrase intelligence is the ultimate aphrodisiac? It truly is. You have the key to unlock peoples minds and you can do with them as you wish. Physical attraction is great and all but it's temporary and prone to fizzling. Even the most beautiful woman in the world get cheated on and tossed away. It's inward attraction thats the most important.

Once you've grabbed someone's attention then they've figured you must be different from all the ones they've met before and this establishes a want and need to know this person in and out, what makes them tick and chirp all nice and pretty. You know how to keep your lover on you. It's your sexy little mind that has the breath taken out of them. It's a surprising but welcome thing. You're like a present under a Christmas tree, the gift you didn't expect but came out to be better than the one you wanted. No one can one up you and your a bloodhound when it comes to figuring out people. A detective in the streets and a Playboy bunny in the sheets, I heard. You're like a knife that scrapes against skin oh-so deliciously, a selective taste but one you never go back from after savoring. People are a little afraid of you. Your words can cut like you have a tongue with barbed wire at the end of it. It's almost masochistic the way some men try to square up against you. They fall like a tree and you get to bask in the victory without so much as a wood chip clinging on to your dress. Lovers have to chase after you to get piece of you. You're a rich and exquisite prize to many. There's something about you that conjures images of class and poshness. You give me rich girl vibes. It's the way you carry yourself. You're so sure and confident it scares people sometimes. Even if you aren't rich, you look it. You treat yourself like an exclusive, like a corner of a club that won't let just anyone hang there until they've undergone an extensive background check and pass an itemized list. You're beautiful and you act like it. You're like a model walking in the streets of New York with her legs exposed, marching like she's on a mission. Everyone around her can't help but to stop and stare and feel wistful of what they can't have. You're enchanting, intensely desirable, the fruit that Tantalus desires and futilely reaches for every time the branch comes close to his mouth. It's part of a game you play with them. I can see that you laugh at them and their hound dog ways. It pumps your ego and keeps you feeling high. I can see you're the same way in your relationships. You never overvalue a lover over yourself, and you don't change yourself for them either. You're independent and require for your persons to be the same way, or else they get cut quick and loose. It's not that people think you're hard to pin down, but they feel you are so effervescent, easy to lose. Your partners think you're sensational, a whirlwind of passion wrapped up in a ribbon of classiness, similar to the feelings evoked when lapping at champagne, swimming in an infinity pool on top of a sky-rise, or sinking into the buttery leathers of a luxury sofa with a fireplace at your feet.

You feel naughty too, like eating bon bons on a cheat day. Your free spirited and live life so fast it's like men need to chase you with their cars. I can see you have a streak for danger, a love to live life on the edge. Die hard and die fast, but with no regrets. I think you're kooky too, so extra and out there, the type to walk ontop of the raised edges of sidewalks, skinny dip into a strangers pool, and dance on Street lamps like they are a strippers pole, haha. You live life in the moment. You're dangerous yet sophisticated, the type that likes to watch plays and carry theatrical masks 🎭 to be funny, one happy and the other one devilish (not sad). I feel you're insatiable for what the world has to offer. You feel the depth and width of the planet and wish it was yours. You want to learn everything there is to know, experience everything there is to feel, record the world through all of your five senses. You're worldly, a person of many dreams in one. Your lovers feel like they have to walk a tight rope with you, risk hovering over a den of tigers to get to you, but it's all worth it with you on the other side, otherwise they wouldn't be doing it. You give them a rush of youth and adrenaline they can't get from ordinary life. You're not peace, your chaos, and so unique and individual that within you lays a multiverse of once in a lifetime experiences. Keep being unapologetically you. ~

⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧

౿૮꒰ྀི The Woman and the Beasts ๑◞꒱ა

[The Fool, Strength, 6 of Cups]

My, my so much yellow came out of this pile. Welcome my little balls of sunshines! You all are as cute as cute can be and absolute cinnamon rolls. At least on first meetings that is. This pile is full of high spirited energy! I feel you glowing with vitality. You seem young and have a childish streak about you, one that propels you high up in the sky on the wings of positive vibrations. Your lovers are addicted to these vibrations. You live in a little bubble of joy and positivity and I have to say I wish I could look at the world this way. Nothing really gets you down, and if it does your quick to pick yourself back up. I feel this is my pile of nature lovers, woman connected to the earth and in high spirits because of it. You like to follow the ebb and flow of life, ride the wavelength so to speak. You may feel out of control over your own destiny, but in a freeing way, like your life is truly yours and no one is in the background pulling your strings. You're like an oasis in a desert, a little spot in the forest to rest in and feel aware of all the other things that live life around you: the birds, the bees, the critters, and the little insects crawling in the ground and over you. Some here may experiment with weed and psychedelics which accounts for your chill, go-lucky attitude and higher spiritual connectivity. I feel this pile is very connected to animals too. You may have adopted a lot of animals or just seem to be a magnet for little forest creatures. You're like a Disney Princess. You radiate kindness and angelic grace and are a woman loved by all creatures that see and know her. Your love for the earth and all its inhabitants pours out of you and creates this beautiful Madonna image. I'm seeing a picture of Mother Mary, serene, beautiful, and otherworldly. It's almost like you are not part of this world. You come off as so delicate and precious, a rarity among a world lost to cynicism and mundanity. Your lovers imagine wrapping themselves up in you like a soft, feathery blanket. You're a source of security to them, a warm balm on their wounds when they fall and get hurt and the ice cream they enjoy afterwards. I feel you love taking care of people. You may play nurse and physically take care of your partners like children, missing their pains and keeping them giggling. You are soft, open and delicious, like a jelly-filled pastries in a bakery!

Everything about you is so refreshing, light and fun. There's an air of innocence that makes you unique, a babydoll made human like like in the Disney movie Life-Size. It's hard to find a light that shines as bright as yours and everyone around you wonders that if they stay near you maybe that light can rub off on them and if not, they are simply satisfied in basking in your glow. You're like a sunflower soaking in sunlight. You connect lovers to their inner child and they cannot get enough of that. With you they can be free and playful, they can release all their worries and learn to enjoy the moment, be a kid again and see life in the pure eyes of a child. You serve as a snapshot to life's most heart-melting moments and once your lovers see things through your eyes, it's like being bathed under a warm, ever-flowing spring. They feel renewed, enlightened, as if they never truly knew sunlight until they met you.

I feel this pile is more spiritually attuned, women that are close to the divine feminine and harness the power of feminity. Your effect is very healing. It kind of reminds me of Fluttershy from My Little Pony. She's warm, kind, and a nature lover, and she uses her powers for the good of others. I feel this pile are participants and donors of good causes, or you wish to be but have yet to take the initiative, but it is only a matter of when. You're an Angel in your own right, a being from high coming to visit the little people down below. There's something about you that's so welcoming and gooey. You're like sunny days spent out on the beach, a twilight where the stars and clouds mingle, and the feeling of being wrapped up in cozy sweaters in Autumn. You remind people that there are things worth saving in this world, that what they can do tomorrow is what they can do today. You're a wellspring of hope, the dream one has in a single night that changes everything. 🌷 Despite all this talk of innocence and rarity, there's a strength to you too, an unyielding stubbornness that only serves to accentuate your womanly wiles. You're always there to help a loved one, and it may go unappreciated because it seems that nothing phases you, when in actuality, you shoulder a lot; you just have an incredible way of keeping yourself untainted. It's almost as if you mop up people's troubles for them. Like a wet sponge to a person's skin, you're cleaning it off and getting their dirt onto you, then emptying the emotional bucket, taking a shower, and going on about your day. Kind of like a sin eater. Ever heard of one of those? Here's an excerpt from Wikipedia so you don't have to search for it: "A sin-eater is a person who consumes a ritual meal in order to spiritually take on the sins of a deceased person. The food was believed to absorb the sins of a recently dead person, thus absolving the soul of the person." Powerful stuff, but I'd be wary of people taking advantage of this. It's easy for people to become codependent on you, and easier for you to become emotionally attached to them. Like cleansing the bad, you sometimes have to cleanse the good too. It's better to take a neutral stance for the health of yourself and others, be the mothering figure but allow for others to make mistakes. You can't walk a person's journey for them, but the support you do give is immeasurable in impact. ~

⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧

ᴀɴʏ ᴄʀɪᴛɪᴄɪꜱᴍꜱ ᴏʀ ꜰᴇᴇᴅʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴀʀᴇ ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇᴅ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴛᴏ ᴀɴʏ ᴏᴘɪɴɪᴏɴꜱ ᴀꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ɪᴍᴘʀᴏᴠᴇ ɪᴛ. ♡

ᴅɪꜱᴄʟᴀɪᴍᴇʀ

© lolita-bonita — Please do not plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my work on other social media platforms without my permission. This is the only platform that I post this type of content. If you see my work being posted anywhere else, please kindly report them to me. ♡

⊱┈─ ✧

✨️ ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴇ: Tarot is not an exact science, nor can it produce factually true information. All things posted are alleged and for entertainment purposes only. The future is fluid, and what may happen is based on your choices and actions, not what I and a deck of cards say. You are still the creator of your future. ✨️

⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧

#pick a card #tarot pick a card #pick a pile #pick a photo #tarot #tarot blog #tarot blr #tarot reader #free tarot

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gracie-eilish · 25 days ago

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masterlist💋🫧🩷✨

requests are open!! wlw only, fluff and mild smut :) sorry, but my sensitive heart can’t handle angst🫣

good luck, babe! 🤭

waves of pleasure 🌊

meet me in the afterglow 🌅

soft kissing hour ☁️

your girl 💋

you can see it with the lights out 💍

can't get over you... 🫂

lavender haze 🪻

morning, her place ☕️

oh my my my... (pt 1) 🎄

your braids like a pattern (love you to the moon, and to saturn) 🩷

feel better sweet girl 💤

peachy (pt 1) (pt 2) (pt 3)🍑

comfy cozy 🫧

lucky girl 🍀

just the way you are 🎶

false god 💋

scalp massage 💆‍♀️

the prettiest girl in the whole wide world 😍

my love 🫂

babygirl ☕️

baby bump 🍼

our girl (pt 1) (pt 2) 💞

Taylor Swift (lyric fics)

Lover 💖

seven 🪐

Thinking about...

softness 🫧

spiciness 🎀

sleepiness 💤

gentleness 🦋

#billie eilish #wlw #billie eilish fluff #fanfiction #billie eilish x fem!reader #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish x you #billie eilish x y/n #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish fic

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potentialbreakupscng · 3 months ago

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💋/for sirius from james !! - @wizardingsouls

the past months since his release have felt like a fever dream -- unsure if he can trust his mind and how it's seeing things. he can't remember the last time his hair has been this short -- last he remembers it hit to his lower back even with the mats and knots from twelve years of neglect. he doesn't remember shaving the hair off of his face that he could barely even call a beard -- and vaguely remembers a familiar voice teasing him about finally being able to grow something. he remembers the conversations he had in azkaban, the ones with his friends that were gone. mad mumblings to himself, james, lily, and remus. he escaped when he saw peter on the front of the prophet, swore that he would seek revenge against the man that they had trusted more than anything -- but ended back up in a cell.

he's not sure where the madness stopped and the man begun -- what was real and what wasn't, especially after narrowly escaping a demetors kiss when all of his past had been brought up. his parents abuse, the way he'd almost torn their friends apart the first time, james and lily dying. he thought he'd been broken before -- but he's a shell of the man he used to be. the boisterous, confident and obnxious man is a shell of himself. barely speaking sentences, trying to understand why -- how his mind has crafted such a beautiful place for him to be in. with remus and james -- older than he remembers them, which is even more odd. prongs and moony were always young when he'd talked to them before, and lily had always been there, too. eventually he allows the façade to win, cracking jokes and feeling himself relax for the first time in over twelve years. the madness even allows harry to visit -- to see him again and to see the emerald green eyes that match his mothers attached to the face of a young james. in the evenings he allows himself to feel the false warmth of the two men that sirius has loved most in this world, finds comfort that he remembers how warm they are.

maybe if he'd allowed himself to allow the madness take over from the start, he would have been better off.

it's odd, he thinks as the façade has the three of them together for an evening, that remus isn't drinking. between the three of them, he'd always been the one to hold his liquor the best -- and was one of the few things the otherwise insecure person had almost prided himself with. their conversation shifts to hermione -- when had hermione been here to have a conversation with them? he barely knows her. only met her briefly in the shack -- why would the madness add her to this conversation? a chuckle is shared between them about how clever she is for having figured them out. a silence follows, until james is the one to ask the question that's been lingering in the air between them since their reunion.

"together forever, remember?" he speaks up, silver eyes landing on the mirage of an older james potter than he can remember -- a gentle smile on his lips. he sets his drink down and watches as james moves toward him, head tilting back to look up at him -- a best friend, lover, and a soulmate wrapped into one person peering down at him. almost too real feeling hands move to cup his cheeks -- and silver eyes flutter closed when he's brought closer and for the first time in over a decade their lips meet. sirius finds himself melting into him, tattooed hands gently resting over the hands that rest on his cheeks. he gets lost in the warmth, in the feeling of kissing james potter again. silver eyes open as they pull away, landing on james's and for a moment letting himself feel the warmth that always came from him. a gentle smile graces his lips, his free hand reaching up to brush some of the other man's curls from his forehead -- always the most unruly hair. the crinkles in the corners of his eye, the warmth of his skin under his fingers as they brush along his forehead to move his hair away from his face. james's lips are upon his again, and he eagerly responds -- clinging desperately to him because it all feels real.

too real.

sirius's hands jerk away from the mirage of james potter in front of him, abruptly pulling away as silver eyes open wide to stare at the mirage that even when shoved away doesn't seem to go away. "no," he mutters to himself, jolting away from the hands that reach out for him, "don't -- don't fucking touch me." he's let this go on for too long. none of this is real -- none of this can be real. heels of his hand press into silver eyes, rubbing violently at them as if it would erase the false images in front of him -- but even that doesn't erase the two sets of concerned eyes that stare at him. "this isn't -- this isn't real. you're" he points to james with a trembling hand, "not real. this isn't real. you're dead."

eyes snap over to remus when he speaks, and he feels both of them approaching as if they're corning and trying to catch a scared creature. "shut the fuck up, you're not real either," he snaps and the glass in his hand goes flying toward the mirage to prove that this whole thing isn't real. the sound of the shattering glass fills the room as remus skillfully dodges the projectile and it shatters on the wall behind them. sirius lunges grabbing anything to throw and destroy to prove that this isn't real. that they aren't real. blinded by images of finding james potter -- screaming to find his glasses because of how blind he is without them -- sirius barely hears the sound of harry's voice as he peers around the corner. harry, living with him? with them? it has to be a dream. he watches as remus darts across the room and guides harry up the stairs -- flinging anything he can in their direction and they disappear up the stairs. a glass shatters in his hand from gripping onto it too tightly, blood dripping down from the palm of his hand onto his wrist -- he doesn't feel the pain, because why would he? it's all not real. this isn't real. nothing he's experienced is real. he's still in azkaban. he has to be. he knows james potter is dead -- and has been for so long. tears stream down his cheeks as he screams over and over again that this isn't real. that james is dead. he's too far gone. he let the façade win and now he can't get back. magic seems to surge through him, sending furniture and other objects flying through the air -- much like when a child first discovers magic and can't control it. being years out of practice, rotting in a jail cell. suddenly, there's a pain in his skull, sharp and skull splitting. . something that's happened since his sixth year at hogwarts -- after his parents tortured him over and over again with the cruciatus curse until he finally decided to run away. he crumbles to the ground, covered in glass shards. bloodied hands move to grip onto the side of his head -- then pound over and over again into his temples as if trying to get the voices that are telling him that this is real out of it. as if it's going to stop the tearing sensation caused by years of abuse. he lets out a heart breaking scream, asking everything to just stop.

and it does. finally. the sharp pain in his head, the tightness in his chest.

tattooed fingers grip onto his hair at the base as the silence is broken when sobs fall past his lips when his entire body trembles. he shakes his heat, tears streaming down his cheeks and when he feels strong arms wrap around him he doesn't try to push them away, and instead collapses into the man that he swears is still a mirage. "this isn't real," his voice is soft and whispered, trembling as bloodied hands move to grip onto the arms that are holding onto him, "you're not real, prongs. i let this go for too long."

#v: polycule james surives verse name here { wizardingsouls }#{ interaction: sirius black }#{ answered ask: sirius black }#james x sirius { wizardingsouls }#u wanted this right??#or did you want something fluffy? oops #wizardingsouls #mental breakdown tw #abuse mention tw #grief tw #long post tw #ptsd tw

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riiwrites · 2 years ago

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hiii !! my mind has been so fixated on sigma lately so could i possibly have any sigma fluff ?

tysm dear ♡

𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀 𝐅𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒

a/n : ofc you can love, ty for your request, i hope head canons are alright for you? 💗

genre : pure fluff

warnings : none

wc : 540

— 𝐒igma is genuinely one of the sweetest boyfriends you could have ever asked for

- he’s just so gentle with you and so sweet

- you two never argue about anything but if you did, it’d be on a very rare occasion about something silly

- due to him only being on Earth for about three years i feel like you’d be his first lover, although he has so much experience with running a casino i just don’t think he’s ever had time to focus on things such as relationships

- that’s why he holds you so close to his heart, he cherishes you, scared that one day you’re going to leave and he’ll be alone

- sorry that was a bit angsty on my part, anyways-

- speaking of him and his casino!!

- he would 100% rigg the casino machines in order for you to win every single time

- he would never admit it though because he just loves seeing you get so happy when you win

- you already know he riggs them in your honour tho but you pretend you don’t know to keep him happy too (≧◡≦)

- LOVES head pats and head kisses

- giving or receiving he doesn’t mind, he’ll normally kiss you on the crown of your head and call you his ‘angel’

- he calls you his angel because he feels like his life had a whole other purpose besides his casino when you walked in

- ur his purpose :((

- basically, you’re his miracle angel

- would give you other pet names such as “love” “miracle” “princess” etc

- you help him run the casino too at times if he would get too stressed

- he doesn’t want to bother you but you insist on helping

- “it doesn’t feel like working when it’s with someone you love”

- loves giving you hugs from behind too, planting a soft kiss on your neck at times

- he’s not afraid to show you off either

- he’ll have you gently placed on his lap whenever he’s sitting down wherever it’s with customers, staff members etc.

- if he’s doing work in his office he’ll have you placed on his lap whilst his chin rests on your shoulder doing whatever he’s doing

- he truly does think of you as his prized possession and he cares for you sm <3

- i also feel like he’d be surprisingly good with doing hairstyles etc

- but i also feel like that’d be false at the same time tho cuz i mean his haircut atm isn’t doing my head canon any justice..

- sorry i love sigma i didn’t mean for that to be slander, anyways 😭

- he would just love playing with your hair, doing styles with it putting clips in it and what not

- would also spoil you with SO much clothes

- very fashionable ones too cuz his outfit is just 💋💋

- his love language is probably acts of service or quality time

- just loves doing stuff for you and he enjoys most of his spare time with you

- bottom line is : he always has a smile on his face when he’s with you <33

#bsd #bsd headcanons #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs #bsd sigma #bsd sigma x reader #sigma x reader #sigma bungou stray dogs #sigma headcanons #sigma bsd #sigma bsd headcanons #bsd x you #sigma x you #fluff #headcanons #riiwrites

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junhoswifey · 6 months ago

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I'm so curious to know what's ur fav ts song from each album????

i love you for asking this 💋💋💋

debut- mary’s song

fearless- don’t you or white horse

speak now- last kiss

red- sad beautiful tragic or forever winter

1989- clean or wonderland

reputation- so it goes… (THAT IS MY SONG)

lover- false god

folklore- illicit affairs!!!!!

evermore- rwylm or ivy

midnights- the great war or maroon

ttpd- the black dog, guilty as sin or imgonnagetyouback

#pbueckerslover °ᡣ𐭩 . ° .#graces anons 🎀#taylor swift

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moonshine999 · 1 year ago

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The Crows as Taylor Swift albums (pt.2)

because I’m awake, slowly losing sanity, and have nothing better to do <3

Nina Zenik : Lover

💋 “I know that I'm a handful, baby, uh // I know I never think before I jump” - ME!

💋 “I'm so sick of running as fast as I can // Wondering if I'd get there quicker // If I was a man” - The Man

💋”Hey, it's all me, in my head // I'm the one who burned us down // But it's not what I meant // I'm sorry that I hurt you” - Afterglow

💋 “Tell me that you're still mine // Tell me that we'll be just fine //Even when I lose my mind” - Afterglow

💋 “Killing me slow, out the window // I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below // Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes // What doesn't kill me makes me want you more” - Cruel Summer

💋”And I screamed for whatever it's worth // “I love you" ain't that the worst thing you ever heard” - Cruel Summer

💋”But we might just get away with it // Religion's in your lips // Even if it's a false god // We'd still worship // We might just get away with it // The altar is my hips // Even if it's a false god // We'd still worship this love” - False God

💋”They say home is where the heart is // But that's not where mine lives” - London Boy

💋”Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh // We can follow the sparks, I'Il drive” - I Think He Knows

💋 “My team is losing, battered and bruising // I see the high fives between the bad guys // Leave with my head hung, you are the only one // Who seems to care” - Ms. Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

💋”Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down // Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town” - Daylight

💋”But if the story's over // Why am I still writing pages?” - Death By A Thousand Cuts

💋 “Our country, guess it was a lawless land // Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand // Paper cut stings from our paper thin plans”- Death By A Thousand Cuts

💋 “All the king's horses, all the king's men // Couldn't put me together again // Cause all of my enemies started out friends // Help me hold onto you” - The Archer

💋”Cat and mouse for a month or two or three // Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe” - Paper Rings

Matthias Helvar : Folklore

🪞 “You're not my homeland anymore // So what am I defending now? // You were my town // Now I'm in exile, seein' you out I think I've seen this film before” - exile

🪞 “ And they said // "There goes the last great American dynasty" //“Who knows if she never showed up, what could've been" “ - the last great American dynasty

🪞 “‘Cause you weren't mine to lose // You weren't mine to lose, no”- august

🪞 “With you, serve // With you, I fall down, down // Watch you breathe in // Watch you breathing out, out” - epiphany

🪞 “Only 20 minutes to Sleep // But you dream of some epiphany // Just one single glimpse of relief // To make some sense of what you've seen” - epiphany

🪞 “Keep your helmet, keep your life, son // Just a flesh wound, // here's your rifle “ - epiphany

🪞 “You drew stars around my scars // But now I'm bleedin'” - cardigan

🪞 “But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss // I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs // The smell of smoke would hang around this long // ‘Cause I knew everything when I was young // I knew I'd curse you for the longest time” - cardigan

🪞 “Time, curious time // Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs // Were there clues I didn't see? // And isn't it just so pretty to think // All along there was some // Invisible string // Tying you to me?” - invisible string

🪞 “And that's the thing about illicit affairs // And clandestine meetings and longing stares // It's born from just one single glance // But it dies, and it dies, and it dies // A million little times “ - illicit affairs

🪞”Look at this idiotic fool that you made me // You taught me a secret language // I can't speak with anyone else” - illicit affairs

🪞 “All these people think love's for show // But I would die for you in secret // The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me // Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?” - peace

🪞” I didn't have it in myself to go with grace //And you're the hero flying around, saving face //And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? // Cursing my name, wishing I stayed // Look at how my tears ricochet “ - my tears ricochet

🪞”And I can go anywhere I want // Anywhere I want, just not home” - my tears ricochet

🪞 “Stood on the cliffside // Screaming, "Give me a reason" // Your faithless love's the only hoax// I believe in // Don't want no other shade of blue // But you // No other sadness in the world would do” - hoax

🪞 “ I want auroras and sad prose // I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet // ‘Cause I haven't moved in years // And I want you right here // A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground “ - the lakes

(Kaz, Inej, Jesper and Wylan are already posted)

#grishaverse #six of crows #matthias helvar #nina zenik #nina x matthias #helnik #taylor swift #swiftie #lover #folklore #It was so difficult narrowing down #The amount of lyrics to fit the post #i love them ur honour #the crows as taylor swift albums

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lunaprincipessa · 8 months ago

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ENTRY 243

Every time I make zodiac posts on my other social media account, I always post for Sagittarius, which is my sign and for Scorpio, the sign of many of my loved ones. Found this info and thought to include it here on Tumblr. More thoughts later.

SAGITTARIUS and SCORPIO!

TRUE or FALSE? YOU DECIDE!

Hidden Talents:

Sagittarius: Journalism. 📚

Scorpio: Investigation. 🔎

Habits:

Sagittarius: Telling it like it is. ☑️

Scorpio: Not trusting anyone until they've proven themselves. ❌

Why They're Attractive:

Sagittarius: Romantically tall or adorably small. 🌹

Scorpio: Seductive looks. 🔥

How Mysterious They Are:

Sagittarius: 0% 😬

Scorpio: 100%🦹🏻

Masters Of:

Sagittarius: Love. 💝

Scorpio: Loyalty. ✊🏼

Emotions They Often Experience:

Sagittarius: Isolation. 🌌

Scorpio: Heartbreak. 💔

What They Cannot Accept:

Sagittarius: Lack of freedom. ⛓️

Scorpio: Losing a lover. 🌧️

When They're Asleep:

Sagittarius: Super adorable. 🐺

Scorpio: Don't you dare touch them. 👿

Deepest Secrets:

Sagittarius: Hates being tied down. 🛑

Scorpio: Wants to keep a safe distance. 🏁

Avoid Dating:

Sagittarius: Cancer 🦀

Scorpio: Gemini 👯‍♀️

Most Likely To Fall In Love With You:

Sagittarius: Aquarius, Aries, Gemini 💐

Scorpio: Aries, Capricorn, Pisces 💐

What They Lie About:

Sagittarius: "I don't care." 🤷🏻‍♀️

Scorpio: "I'm not obsessed." 😳

Secret Knowledge:

Sagittarius: Knows how to talk to people. 💋

Scorpio: Knows when people are lying. 👀

Bad Luck:

🌬️ Don't be fake with a Sagittarius.

🗯️ Don't keep a secret from a Scorpio.

#Sagittarius #Scorpio #zodiac fun

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moriartyluver · 1 month ago

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FALSE LOVERS CHAPTER XXX

AND THERE IT WAS. SHE HAD FINALLY SAID IT.

That phrase she had been so reluctant to say for the past few years, the idea of her loving him had been that difficult to accept and now she finally had and it had even surprised (Name) herself.

"You..love me..?" William repeated gently, eyes scanning her face in disbelief.

Before she could nod in confirmation, William stood up, removing his hands from hers as he stood up, prompting (Name) to do the same.

"We can leave now, it shouldn't be too difficult. I can alert the others to be ready by dawn and-"

"What makes you think I reciprocate your feelings?" He asked, turning to face the window

(Name)'s jaw was agape in surprise for a moment. How foolish of her to assume that such a simple statement would be enough to convince William to escape and have a new life with her. She should have known he wouldn't feel the same, she was just a foreigner after all, an unlovable harlot with no redeeming qualities.

"You don't." She stated, affirming the fear she had held within her battle against these feelings.

"Why would I ever want to love you?" William glanced over his shoulder, giving her a piercing, disgusted glare. (Name) was a woman of normal stature, confident in her size, but under his gaze at that moment, she had felt undeniably small. "You're conceited, arrogant, selfish, rude - need I say more?"

"I..." her throat felt dry as she tried to come up with a response. The walls she had fought so desperately to keep strong had fallen apart and were being destroyed by her own husband's cold words.

William continued, still gazing out the window, only able to see (name) through its reflection. "If I must..you are unbelievably self centred, even Narcissus himself would be appalled, not to mention entitled and hypocritical. You're vain, pretentious, self- absorbed, why on earth would I love a woman like that? Even saying 'I hate you' could not accurately describe the feelings of disgust I hold against you. I despise you, and I find it humourus that you've ever loved me."

"So all this..meant nothing to you?" (Name) asked, clutching at the fabric on her dress.

"Did it mean anything to you?" He spat back. "You've had many other men in your life, even whilst we were married."

"That was one time!"

"For five months! Five months I was without you, hoping, foolishly, for your safety!" He exclaimed. This was the first time she had seen him like this, a look of genuine upset on his face. This was the first time he had felt like this too. "And you were lying beneath another man, although I'm sure it wasn't the first time."

"William!" She almost wailed. "You don't..You don't understand, we never said we couldn't be with other people. And besides, I had only kissed you twice at that point, so it's not as if you were directly affected."

William practically rolled his eyes "Commitment actually comes with the marriage, contractual or not. But I'm sure you just couldn't help yourself."

"Oh my god, William," She sighed in exasperation. "I just told you I love you and you react by insulting me?! I suppose I really was wrong about you. You used me for affection and my brain!"

"As if you didn't do the same."

"But you were the one insisting upon it!" She yelled "All those times you called me beautiful, that I felt good, that I had a pretty voice, all of that was just fake! And you have the audacity to act as though I'm in the wrong!"

"The only on here with any sense of audacity is you." William spoke, much calmer than before. "You and I had nothing romantic going on. It was just a mutually beneficial relationship."

"Well if you aren't going to acknowledge our far from casual relationship, perhaps you could listen to me once more."

"Oh of course your highness, allow me to listen to your ridiculous voice describe some ridiculous point that I'm sure everyone and their mother already knew, because, of course, you are just so incredibly special." William said sarcastically.

"I'm pregnant."

William's eyes widened for a moment. He wanted to smile, to hold her in his arms and kiss her senseless.

"And how am I to know if that child is mine, considering you have slept with every nobleman over the age of 20," he retorted. "That child isn't mine, regardless of what you may try to persuade me with."

"William, please," she pleaded. "I haven't slept with anyone but you ever since I've been with you."

"So that five month long affair didn't happen?"

"Well, it did," she tried to defend herself "but this is recent..." she sighed "I have my heir. Do you not want to live to see him? To meet him?"

"Him?"

"Mother's intuition."

"Of course." He said sarcastically once more, uncharacteristically. "Like I said, I want nothing to do with you or that child."

(Name) stated at him in disbelief. She had now retired all methods of keeping him with her. And frankly, she wasn't even sure she wanted him anymore.

"You're a coward," she stated. "A stupid, pathetic coward who is no longer of any use to me, or to my cause. You will die alone with nobody to love you, and I will forever curse myself for even considering, for entertaining the idea I might be in love with you. Because clearly, I'm not."

And like that, she had stormed out, in typical (name) fashion, for the last time, not even giving him another glance.

She had left straight afterwards, taking her luggage with her. Initially, she had planned to sleep first, but it seemed she couldn't bear to sleep in the same bed that William had once used a few times. (Name) took the next carriage possible to the docks where so was supposed to board the shop soon after.

Despite the crowds of whispers regarding the Lord of crime, she had managed to board the ship fairly easily and quickly with no interruptions. She sat inside with Romeo in her lap, petting him as she waited for her parents. They followed soon after, spotting her alone.

"You couldn't.." Her mother started. She shook her head.

"I tried." She said, her voice barely above a whisper. She winced, feeling a sharp pain in her abdomen but brushed it off.

Once everyone had boarded the ship, and they were ready to set sail, (name) stepped outside, leaving the small kitten to sleep in her bed. It would be a long wait till she and her parents were to arrive at (home country).

She took in a deep breath, sighing as she bowed her head, clinging to the fences around the ship. She felt that sharp pain again. Her father followed her outside, looking for her.

"(Name)?"

"Yes father?"

"They might have to delay the ship, for a while..a fire's broken out," He averted his gaze, knowing how his daughter likely wanted to leave as soon as possible. "They're waiting for it to clear first.."

"I see.." (name) hummed absentmindedly "I'll come back inside when they do."

"It's not your fault."

"I know."

Her father soon left, leaving her alone. A bright light appeared along with some smoke. (Name) shut her eyes at the brightness, opening them again to see the tower bridge, which had been recently constructed.

She could hear people screaming from afar, and she looked up, spotting two figures, who she could barely make out from where she was standing, but she already knew.

She felt another sharp pain, this time worst than the last.

She saw one, who she assumed was William, charge at the other — Sherlock. He discarded his cloak, and then another explosion went off. William jumped, but was unsuccessful as Sherlock caught him by the hand, trying to pull him up as he dangled off the edge of the bridge.

(Name) couldn't help the lump that formed in her throat, or the tears in her eyes. She wanted to scream out for him, even if he couldn't hear. She knew that was selfish, after what she had said earlier, but she could help that either.

The pain in her abdomen just kept getting worse, forcing her to clutch her stomach and cling to the railings for support. It kept growing worse, even more so once she had seen William leap from Sherlock's grasp, right down into the Thames. The dam keeping her tears back broke, and they streamed down her cheeks. She could barely see through her tears as Sherlock jumped soon after whilst she fell to the floor, her knees giving out beneath her.

Her father soon came back to check on her, to remind her they were leaving now as the fire had been put out.

"(Name), are you alright?" He asked, approaching her. He placed a hand on her shoulder, noticing a pool of blood beneath her as she crouched over.

"(Name)!"

#moriarty the patriot #—false lovers 💋#william james moriarty #william moriarty #william moriarty x reader #yuukoku no moriarty #mtp william #moriarty the patriot x reader #yuukoku no moriarty x reader

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lestappenforever · 1 year ago

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Hello! 💋 anon back with another fic idea <3 this one is much less “planned out” though. Its very vague. And shout out to whoever it was a while ago that came up with a similar idea but for horse riders lestappen, because that inspired me a bit.

Basically, it’s genderbent lestappen. They are figure skating rivals. Max is an extremely technical, jumping machine type of skater (think Sasha Trusova). Charles is a more artistic focused skater (think Yuna Kim). They are rivals, have been for years, and they also happen to be the two favorites for the Olympic gold this Olympic year.

Cue LOTS of drama. Maybe something like what happened at the previous Olympics where, since Max is supposed to be Sasha-esque, something similar that happened to her happens to him (or her.. since they’re genderbent?). She is being put second by her coach to another skater and as compensation, her coach promises Max the gold at the at the Olympics, but Max can see as the Olympics get closer that isn’t happening, and Max confides in Charles. OR maybe something inspired by all the doping scandals that’s come out in figure skating in the past year and a half, either Max or Charles gets accused of doping (obviously, for the fic sake it turns out to be false) and the other one surprisingly defends the one being accused in the media and they grow closer from that?

Also a fun little side plot could be a ship of two rival drivers from the older generation of your preference (I’m thinking Seb and Fernando or Lewis and Fernando?) being lestappen’s coaches and having their own little enemies to lovers plot line in the background HAHA.

Not me saying this was way less planned out than the last one and then proceeding to plan out the entire thing LMFAO I got carried away.

Love, 💋 anon

Good morning, 💋 anon! I've missed you. ❤️

Genderbending ships is not really my cup of tea, but I adore this idea! So if anyone who reads this and feels compelled to write something based on this lovely anon's wonderful suggestion, please feel free to do so, and please let me know if you do! Both myself and 💋 anon would love to read it.

Thank you so much for this ask, my darling! 💕

#Asks #Anon asks

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distopea · 2 years ago

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41.--to pretend. ( for Oliver )

@cantuscorvi

Kiss meme 💋 (not accepting)

He stepped out of the bathroom, back in his escort clothes. It was still the middle of night, but Raum hadn’t called him to stay this time, he needed a carnal connection, and despite their vicious argument before, they had both ended up making love. Fucking. Oliver was lost as he didn’t know anymore what they were doing during those moments. It was like facing two people at the same time; one who was caring and soft, and the other who was wicked and harsh. He knew that Raum was fighting himself to figure out what he should do, and Oliver, on his side, was letting him drown in that sea of doubts and false pretenses.

He walked into the living room, and watched Raum’s back with agony. Oh, he had wished more than once that his lover - client - would one day tell him that this whole game was over. That he was free from running back to Astra. But they had never dared to have this conversation at all. Raum, at least, had stopped putting money on the table after it was done. It was the illusion of being two normal individuals. It was only a veil of honey to stop the rotten smell from spreading throughout the room. Yet, even if Oliver could pretend it wasn’t true, he could smell it. It was suffocating.

“I have to go.” He said while he walked past Raum and stood in front of the desk. The blond was already looking at papers and documents, his hair and his creased shirt the only clues regarding what he had done just before. Everything belonged to the past; each time he was pulling Oliver in present times, he was quick to shove him back to a place where he wouldn’t have to see anything. He was back to his coldness, not even sparing an eye on Oliver. It had become his hurtful but usual goodbye. Only to pretend that Oliver wasn’t in the room, or perhaps a way to forget that he had been the one calling him. Oliver smirked bitterly and didn’t fight, before he turned around and made sure to grasp his phone.

Kaizen, 3:45am: Where r you? Kaizen, 3:49am: I sent a car to your location. You gotta sleep, Astra wants to talk to you tomorrow.

Oliver felt his heart sinking right inside his chest, the fear of dying suddenly invading his whole body. It had been months since he had seen Astra; the last meeting wasn’t pleasant. He could barely hide the fact that he was unwell and dizzy, but when he looked back up, he witnessed Raum glancing at him. Unmasked, Oliver was even more naked than he had ever been tonight. He pinched his lips together and shoved his phone right into his jeans pocket, defying Raum to ever ask that forbidden question he had never said:

‘Are you alright, Oliver?’

The blue-haired boy hesitated while he took his coat hanging on a chair, but instead of leaving the room, he eventually walked back to Raum’s desk. With no other word, he crossed the distance between them and gripped the collar of his shirt. With all of his heart, his hate, his muffled love, his agonizing fear, he kissed his lover. It was a way to pretend they were allowed to say goodbye like this, that tomorrow wouldn’t be a darker day than it was before. He parted when he felt that he couldn’t pretend anymore, before he eventually turned around.

‘Are you alright, Oliver?’

Nothing. Oliver walked to the front door and left. Until next time. Until the next call. If there ever was a next day for him.

#; cantuscorvi #⌇playing all the aces on the table ( 𝙈𝙚𝙢𝙚 )#⌇entrechat ( 𝙊𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧 | IC )#⌇aftertaste of a lost home ( 𝙊𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧 / 𝙍𝙖𝙪𝙢 )#; I'm placing this emotional damage before that conversation thread we have #; AND NOW I AM ROLLING IN MY CARPET AND JUST CRY #; god they are just masters when it comes to HURT EACH OTHER

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yaretsblog · 8 months ago

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En el susurro del viento y el brillo de la luna,

nuestro amor florece como una dulce fortuna.

En cada beso, en cada abrazo, en cada mirada,

se enciende la pasión, la delicadeza, la llamarada.

Tus labios, como pétalos de rosa tan suaves,

despiertan en mí un fuego que nada esconde o trae falves.

Tu piel, acariciada con ternura y dulzura,

me transporta a un mundo de amor y locura.

Cada palabra de amor que pronuncias con pasión,

cede una melodía nueva a mi corazón.

En tus ojos, el reflejo del amor más puro,

un universo de ternura que en mí hace seguro.

En cada gesto, en cada suspiro, en cada instante,

nuestro amor florece como un eterno amante.

Que la pasión y la ternura llenen nuestro ser,

en este romance que nos une, en este amar y ser. 💋❤️‍🔥 @hamdan-fazza @yaretsblog

In the whisper of the wind and the shine of the moon,

Our love blossoms like a sweet fortune.

In every kiss, in every hug, in every look,

The passion, the delicacy, the flame is ignited.

Your lips, like rose petals so soft,

They awaken in me a fire that nothing hides or brings false.

Your skin, caressed with tenderness and sweetness,

It transports me to a world of love and madness.

Every word of love that you speak with passion,

Give a new melody to my heart.

In your eyes, the reflection of the purest love,

a universe of tenderness that makes me safe.

In every gesture, in every sigh, in every moment,

Our love blossoms like an eternal lover.

May passion and tenderness fill our being,

in this romance that unites us, in this loving and being. 💋❤️‍🔥

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slut4sway · 2 years ago

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tracksuits and red wine (movies for two)

Dumb conversations We lose track of time Have I told you lately I'm grateful you're mine We'll watch The Notebook For the 17th time I'll say "It's stupid" Then you'll catch me crying

We're not making out On a boat in the rain Or in a house I've painted blue But there's nothing Like doing nothing

With you

💋💌•••••••••••••••❤️‍🩹🍷

tags : suzufield, nick suzuki, cole caufield, hurt/comfort, injured/comfort, hockey rpf, tooth rotting fluff, valentine’s day, love letters, fluff, coles injury, title inspired by bruno major

notes: LOVERRRRRRRR

2/14/23

Nick was living.

Cole wasn't.

The poor boy has been injured, and because of his shoulder he'd been out for the whole rest of the season. He didn't take this news lightly when he received the notice he'd be having surgery; since his whole world seemed to cave in under his feet. Hockey was Cole's life. He lived, breathed, and slept hockey and without it his life would definitely take a turn for the worse.

Nick was there to make it better as always. He'd seen Cole fall apart and he has been right there to pick him right back up again. Even when Cole had anger growing in his bones and just letting it go and taking it out on the world, Nick never left. It was obvious the energetic, goofy kid had turned into a rage-filled maniac. Cole could hardly express his emotions already, and showing it through anger seemed like the easiest alternative because he could have something to be mad at. A reason to be angry. His injury didn't happen for a reason and he knew it. Maybe to slow him down and let him come back and reflect on himself, but ultimately it made things worse. He was on fucking fire and on his way to burning down the league; but now his team is on their way to tank.

Yes. Cole is alive. But he isn't at the same time.

Nick was right there to not let him shatter.

•

The small blonde boy lied on the porch of their lakehouse just outside the city. The home was quiet, devoid of his lover's presence. Canadien's postgame broadcast of course, playing in the background off of Cole's phone falsely filled the emptiness. Small ripples reflected the vague moonlight off of the water, with a few birds chirping and rustling the trees above it.

Birds? Already? For fucks sake, it's the middle of winter in Canada.

Quebec's bipolar weather was in his favor today since he could just sit out on the porch swing and stare off into nothing sipping tea and being alone with his thoughts. Oh, Cole. Oh, baby. Him and his damn overthinking.

What's Nick doing right now?

Is he coming home soon?

Is he still with the guys in the locker room?

How is he?

I wonder if he texted me.

Should I check?

What's the point, I never got a notification sound so...?

Did Nick forget Valentine's day?

He said he would be home by 11pm...

Its 11:06.

Calm down, it's only 6 minutes.

What if he got in a car wreck?

Fuck, fuck, fuck...

He's fine.

No he's not.

I should text him.

Cole picked up his phone and opened it with face id, miraculously since he looked nothing like himself as if he hasn't slept in days. He pulled up Nick's contact and typed. Then deleted his words. Typed again. Backspace again. Finally finding the words, he just let his fingers swipe something onto the keyboard mindlessly. Hitting send, he heard back from Nick in seconds.

c : are you okay?

n : yes ml, almost done. don't worry.

Almost done? Nick was definitely planning something because he would have said almost home. Maybe he wasn't. Probably just Cole overthinking again. He just ignored it and went on.

c : imu

n : ik. almost done.

c : how was the game

n : okay i guess, had fun. wish you would've been playing with me

c : ugh don't remind me

Read 11:10pm

Okay. Just something else on Cole's mind. Great.

Nick never means to add more to his doubt, but he can't help it since Cole can pull almost anything out of his ass and worry about it. It was like a superpower. A really shitty superpower.

•

About 15 minutes had passed, and Cole was struggling to keep his eyes open. Without Nick or something to focus on, staying awake was a challenge. The broadcast had become white noise and eventually faded away. He was wrapped up in a sherpa blanket, and the small eighth of his tea he had left in the mug had gone cold and grew to be the same temperature as outside.

Abruptly, the front door came flying open and Nick busted out of the doorway almost tripping over himself and dropping the wax-sealed letter he held between his fingers.

''Happy Valentine's Day, Colesy!'' He was wearing the biggest smile Cole had ever seen, and he looked no different from a teenager getting a phone call from their crush or some other bullshit. Nick was so big and dumb it made Cole mad. But he loved being mad for Nick.

Madly in love with him, that is.

''Nicholas, fuck- you scared me!'' The blonde boy snapped, even though he could never be angry at Nick. Nick with his perfect hands. Nick with his dark hair. Nick with his deep voice. Nick with his heartwarming laugh. Nick with his pearly white smile. Nick with his swelled muscles. Nick.

''I'm sorry, I'm sorry! It's worth it, I promise'' Nick's smile radiated pure sunshine on dark days and happy energy. It was so genuine and sweet it could have melted Cole right then and there if he was ice cream.

''Hmm.. alright.'' Cole returned an affectionate smirk as he hauled himself from the porch swing and took the envelope from Nick's hands. He took a big step to the side into the doorway, all his joints starting to thaw and become loose again as the heat circulated around them.

Nick brought a hand up to caress his cheek as he followed him inside, toying with his sandy hair between his fingers. He watched as the smaller boy's recovering shoulder lay limp, with his arm lying motionless besides the small jerks because of physics in the sling. Cole kept scratching and scratching at the wax seal, leaving red shavings all under his fingernails.

''Here. Let me.'' The older boy gently took the envelope from his hands and peeled away the wax seal. Cole then snatched it from his hands, eager to read as he pulled it from the white envelope.

The note was folded up and quite thick, and when Cole had pulled it out it unraveled like a ball of yarn and folded-up sheets of paper fell to the floor; almost looking like an accordion.

''Nicky..'' Cole was both in shock and completely enamored, as some color ran to his cheeks watching it fall to the floor, some words written in Nick's messy handwriting scribbled onto the page stood out, with little red hearts whenever Nick mentioned his name.

Dear Colesy, You're mine. You're my world. My everything. My boy. I'll scream it from the fucking rafters, Cole. I have not come across love as deep as this. You have redefined the meaning of love to me and showed me that I deserve it in every possible way. Its in the way you call my name, the way you hold my hand, the many jokes you crack, the many tears you wipe off my face, and the words of encouragement you give me every day. I go to bed knowing that I have genuine love from you, and for once, all the love I give is returned to me in these beautiful ways. I love you, Cole. I adore you and would not trade our love for each other with anything in this world. It is as simple as it comes but one of the most beautiful things I have had in my life. You have made it safe for us to be ourselves without fear of judgment. You have pushed us far to grow and improve as individuals and lovers. I can confidently say that I have experienced true love with you, and this is always what I wanted. When I think about you, I feel blessed and loved. You are like home to me, and the calmness and peace that comes with knowing someone loves you genuinely. I feel the love in how you treat me and push me to become a better person. I have broken barriers and beliefs that stopped me from realizing my best self with you in my life. Thank you for being such an integral part of my growth. One thing I know for sure is that this relationship has taught me things I would never have learned if I didn’t meet you. You have helped me redefine myself and the things I want for myself. I have dug deep into myself and discovered my potential to make it in life. Thank you for loving me and impacting my life so positively. No one can change my belief that you are a fantastic person to your loved ones and me. You have so much love to give; I get inspired to do the same for the people around me. Your impact on my life is far beyond the love notes, the kisses, and the dates; it is how I seek inspiration from you to become better for me, you, and everyone else. Your love never fails, and ours has proven that over and over again. I am confident in what we have built together and where we are heading. This is just the beginning of a beautiful, fulfilling future together. Cheers to many bright days and happy moments together; I love you. I never lose the spark I get from our relationship. Every time I see you, I feel like the first time I lay my eyes on you. You remain my crush, and the feeling remains so fresh and alive. The love we are creating for ourselves will be magical, and we will be glad we stuck together. My life is as peaceful as it can get with you by my side. You have shown me what love feels like and why it is important to everyone. Knowing that you wake up every day and choose to love me gives me more confidence to work on me and us. I love you more now than ever. Knowing I have this precious gift in my life makes me want to see another day. You are worth treasuring, and with every passing day, I will show my appreciation for being in my life. You are more than I imagined, more than I prayed for, and more than I ever wanted. No joy goes beyond the feeling I get when I am with you. You spark a lot of appreciation for life because you are in mine. And, knowing that you will always be here for us gives me hope for a happy future together. I love you for everything that you are and will be. Life has not been the same since I decided to bring you into my life bubble. You have been with me during the dark days and the happy days, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I get to do life with you as we figure out our dreams and aspirations. I am happy I have you here with me. I know I say this a lot, but I didn’t think I’d find love as deep as this one. You have made me believe in the power of letting love lead the way for us, and this has revealed to us the most beautiful thing ever; our love. I can't wait to see what the future holds, but I know it will be beautiful and worth the journey. Love, Nicky <3

Cole's eyes darted across the page, pulling it up from the floor every now and then to continue reading until he got to the bottom of the page. Some tears pooled in his tired eyes, as he looked back at Nick who was just standing there still beaming at him.

''Nicholas..!'' Cole let the tears fall from his eyes, as his voice shook from the emotional words that Nick had poured his heart out through.

''I love you so much, more than words could ever explain'' The taller boy traced gentle circles into Cole's bad shoulder, massaging his scalp as Cole cried into his chest and left small wet spots on his shirt.

Cole could smell the teakwood body wash on Nick's skin even through his shirt, just another aspect that made him Nick. He felt the larger body gently lift him from the ground, being gentle with his shoulder as Nick steadied him and carried him to their bedroom.

''All mine, baby.''

The blonde boy lifted his head away from Nick, glancing around at the room until the bay window caught his eye. It was adorned with rose petals, pink and red pillows, blankets, a shit ton of candy, and two wine glasses on the nightstand dragged next to their new cozy spot.

''Y-you did all this? For me? Seriously, Nick?'' Now Cole was beaming just as bright and happy as Nick was; still admiring what Nick had set up.

''When did you even get the time?''

''Is that why you came from the front door?''

''I mean I wonder why I heard your car parking out back and-''

Words flew out of Cole's mouth like the spitfire boy he was, so many thoughts circulating his head and coming straight out.

''Shhh.. Settle.'' He cooed, interrupting his constant flow of consciousness. Nick carried him to the window, setting him down softly while still being careful with his shoulder. Nick made himself comfortable, holding the blanket to the side as he motioned for him to lie in his lap.

Cole likes Nick's thighs. Like a lot. Maybe more than a lot. Cole really likes Nick's thighs. If Cole had the energy, he'd be leaving marks and bites all over him. Maybe another time when his shoulder is not fucked up. But for now, all he wants is to lay his head on Nick's thighs and let the rest of the night waste away with him.

Cole propped his shoulder up on a pillow, while Nick grabbed a glass and gently held Cole's chin up to make it easier to drink. The younger boy let his jaw slack, as his lover gently tipped the glass further so the French wine could pour out into his mouth. The flavors of bittersweet alcohol danced on his tongue. Nick twirled Cole's silky hair around his fingers, placing the wine glass back then taking a sip of his own.

Both boys continued this for a while, not needing to say anything. Being in each other's presence was enough.

The moonlight flooded in through the window, as they continued to let the time tick away and the ripples on the lake roll. Nick definitely didn't forget Valentine's Day.

#Spotify #suzufield #nick suzuki #cole caufield #writers block #this is terrible #valentines day #mens hockey rpf

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moriartyluver · 2 months ago

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FALSE LOVERS CHAPTER XXIX

"SO, DID YOU TELL WILLIAM?" Josephine asked as she walked through the Moriarty Manor with (Name) "you know, about your condition.."

"What?" (Name) blinked, clearly invested in her own thoughts whilst her friend spoke. "Oh...my condition.." she paused, standing still on the stairs, her hand rubbing at her neck nervously, then moving to fidget with her hair. "see..the issue is.." She trailed off, trusting to explain. Josephine furrowed her brows, noticing a fresh bruise on her neck.

"Oh my god." She huffed under her breath. "You didn't tell him, did you? You slept with him! Again!!"

(Name) frowned, getting a little defensive "It's a very difficult position to be in-"

"Oh I bet you know a lot about difficult positions.." The brunette remarked.

"Josephine!"

"Sorry, sorry. I've never been pregnant before, surprisingly, so I can't judge.." she hummed

"Don't say that word out loud. If my own husband doesn't know, I'd rather nobody but you or James know either." (Name) said, moving her hand down to fiddle with her sleeve "I did try to tell him, I really did. But then he started being all flirtatious and he somehow has this way of making me feel all funny, and honestly he may be the best man I've ever had, in a weird sort of way.."

"I'd never imagine you describing William as such," Josephine giggled "Still, how did things escalate so much..?"

"Well, I went to his office, made some small talk about the incident with Whitely, before he was assassinated, then he starts making some jokes, and we reminisced on our university days together. He brought up this one memory I feel quite fond of, and then I realised that I must have been very..mean to him, more so than I am now. As if I crossed the line a few times, so I apologised and then we kissed, and then.." (Name) spoke very, very quickly, her demeanour flustered "Well, you know.."

"I'd rather not know," Josephine pulled a face. To her, this was like walking in on one's parents doing it. "Also you should tell him to be more discreet..you have a huge bruise on your neck, it almost looks painful.."

"You should see the ones I gave him." She joked, before noticing josie's flat expression. "Sorry."

She rolled her pale blue eyes, walking down the staircase with her to the lounge. "It's fine..it's quite nice to be able to gossip for once, especially with how busy things have been lately. With Fred now gone more often, I've been used as messenger girl whenever I'm available.."

"Yes, well, we did recently confirm to the public that this urban legend of the Lord Of Crime is real..it's a shame my old persona hasn't made a return. Now she is just the Lord of Crime's wife," (Name) chuckled dryly, her silk gloves sliding across the bannisters.

"Most women could only dream of such a thing," Josephine reassured with a soft laugh whilst they walked into the lounge whilst the others discussed matters regarding milverton.

"..but I would never choose that option. I'll kill Milverton whether my name spread or not." William spoke, pausing as (Name) entered the room. Everyone went silent for a second or two as she sat down beside her husband, confused as to what they were discussing.

"I'm afraid I missed a few chapters." (Name) stated calmly. "Are we really going ahead with such a plan, provided the risk?"

"(Name)," William placed his hand on her thigh reassuringly. At this point in time, he didn't care if people knew of their odd relationship. "It was bound to happen at some point."

"Right." She nodded stiffly. She was clearly unhappy with the idea but she couldn't say much. It was part of their contract and pre existing agreement before they started their affair — could one even have an affair with their spouse?

"As Louis said, this mission will carry unprecedented risks, but I can't keep Milverton alive much longer." He said. (Name) honestly was quite fond of Milverton at first, but upon finding he was responsible not only for the deaths of the Whitleys, but also the Jack the Ripper scandal, she could care less if he died. She just found him intriguing.

Sherlock used the correct means to achieve moral goals, William used unethical means to achieve moral goals and Milverton purposely would use horrible means to achieve horrible goals.

She couldn't help but wonder why.

Regardless, he was to die, hopefully at William's hands, because she'd rather not have Milverton be Sherlock's first kill.

"Let's take action as soon as we're ready." William stated, snapping (name) out of her thoughts.

Louis parted his lips, about to protest before William cut him off again.

"We all knew this was coming, Louis. It was going to happen sooner or later," He said. "It's all according to the moriarty plan."

"So this is it.." (Name) muttered as she sat on William's bed, surprisingly clothed.

"This is it." He repeated. "When you signed that contract, you knew it would come to this..I apologise."

It didn't exactly feel sincere when he apologised, almost as if he was speaking to an acquaintance or associate — not his wife.

"I suppose I'll have to remarry.." She hummed. She knew she probably wouldn't, couldn't. She was finally pregnant, with an heir. That's all she needed.

William's jaw clenched at the mere idea of another man stealing the life he wanted. "I suppose you will." He nodded, shutting the book in his hands, getting out of his chair and approaching his bed on the other side of the room. "I.." He opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again, like a fish.

"I know." She looked up at him. "I know."

He nodded, sitting down beside her and wrapping an arm around her waist apologetically whilst she rested her head on his shoulder. "Who would've thought..you and me.."

"I never took you as the sentimental type." she laughed dryly.

"I am a dead man walking, after all," William rubbed her shoulder soothingly. "Speaking of which..."

"I'll pay for the funeral, don't worry. I can even have you sent to (home country) so you can have a tomb where it won't be destroyed by angry people." She said in a soft, melancholy tone.

"That's alright. I'll let my gravesite be destroyed and ruined." He smiled. "Actually..I was thinking."

"You always think."

"So do you," he chuckled. "But in all seriousness, this is important. I'm going to have to ask you to do something a little bit difficult."

"I've never failed any mission you've given me," (name) reminded him. "I'm your strongest soldier."

"That you are," He kissed her forehead. "But this isn't a physical thing..I mean, you'll pick up a pen, and write a few sentences, but it's.." William trailed off, his scarlet eyes shifting away from her and onto the equally red wallpaper.

"What is it?" she asked curiously.

"I'm going to need you to write a letter," He explained, rubbing her thigh. "To one of the main newspapers. I'll need you to write about how you recently discovered I was the lord of crime, how you plan to annul the marriage, and how you want the public to know you were never involved."

He paused, looking into her eyes, searching for a reaction. She took a moment to process his words, her eyebrows furrowing in an angry glare.

"No! Why would you ask me to do such a thing? I may be a killer but I can't lie to an entire nation!" She exclaimed, standing from the bed. "I was just as involved as you were, and I've been killing since I was 16!"

"You've lied numerous times before, I don't see how this may be any different," He pointed out.

"But it's different—" She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "What am I to tell my parents? My friends? Should I just continue to live a lie after you...you.."

She couldn't even bring herself to say it.

"You can tell your parents the truth if you like, (name). They're good people, they wouldn't cast you out." He reassured her "And it's for your own sake. What will society think of a woman who knowingly let her husband kill people? What will they think when they find out you helped too? What will they think when they find out you married me because you just wanted to keep your parents happy and the men away? This is for your sake, I only ask that you write one letter."

"William.." She whispered his name.

"If you don't, I'm afraid I'll have to forge one." He stated. "You're already in enough trouble with parliament and her majesty herself, what will they do to you or to (home country) if they realise you were involved, that you were the lady of crimes."

She sighed. He was right.

"I have business to attend to in Manchester, tomorrow afternoon, which I can always say was done out of fear of my husband being upset with me. I may have time to write a letter then and send it off as soon as possible to all the newspapers possible." She rambled. "And I'm telling my parents. They're going to be in Manchester too."

"Everything?"

"Everything."

"I knew something was wrong." Grand Duchess (last name) sighed. "I told you, didn't I, (Father's name)?"

"You're right. I apologise for not believing you, my love." He rubbed his wife's shoulder, kissing her cheek apologetically.

(Name) couldn't bear to even look at them. She kept her head bowed and her eyes on her shoes. "I'm sorry, again."

"No, (Name). I'm sorry." Her mother reached her hand out to hold her daughter's. "So is your father. This wouldn't have happened if we.."

"There was nothing you could've done to change anything." She reminded them. "I had to do what I did, regardless of how horrible and wrong it was.."

Her parents shared a look, before turning to their daughter again. She looked so small, so vulnerable. It was as if she was 9 years old all over again.

"But we should have been there." The grand duke spoke. "At such a young age, you witnessed something so traumatising, and you lost your brother too..then we encouraged you to go to Britain for the sake of your education, and didn't contact you regularly, only visiting a handful of times, and even then we weren't around long enough for you."

Her mother nodded in agreement. "If we had been there, if we had made you feel safe and welcome with us, you wouldn't have killed as many people as you did, you wouldn't have felt the need to marry a man you despised, and you wouldn't be in the situation you are in right now."

"It wasn't your fault.." (Name) whispered, holding back tears. "There's this man, Charles Augustus Milverton..he would spread rumours about me through a magazine he owned, solely to torment me..it just made matter worse and now he's going to expose William's wrong doings to the entire country, and that..I can't imagine how he must feel right now.."

The grand duchess sighed. "You love him, don't you?"

"I do."

"For how long?"

"I..I'm not entirely sure.." She glanced down to her stomach. "But I know that I can't let him die..I just can't."

"There's something else you're not telling us, isn't there?" Her father asked.

"You can tell us, we won't judge you or be upset." Her mother reassured. "We're your parents."

"I haven't even told William..Josephine, and another close friend that I work with, they're the only ones who know..." she trailed off. "I mean, how could I tell him. I haven't even told him I love him yet..He's convinced our relationship is just a facade for the public with some extra benefits for the both of us.."

"(Name).."

"I'm pregnant."

"It's a shame this comedy doesn't have an audience," Milverton laughed as William and Sherlock turned their pistols to face him, rather than pointing at each other. They had both been inside Milverton's villa for a while now, with two very different reasons yet seemingly the same outcome. "The light and dark that symbolise London..the two of them are here together."

"Make that three." A voice spoke from behind Milverton. He glanced over his shoulder, smirking as he saw his main target, (Name) (Last name).

His smirk widened as he noticed a gun in her hand, pointing straight at him, finger on the trigger. "It's splendid you could join us. You seem so innocent but upon further inspection, anyone could tell that you had been aiding your husband's 'activities' all along, perhaps even the match that lit the fire."

"I'm not here for him." She assured "You know exactly what you've done."

"I do indeed." He chuckled, watching as (Name) slowly walked through the dimly lit room so she was stood in front of him, beside William and Sherlock. "And I'm glad you turned up. I was worried, really, that you weren't going to be here when I saw your husband without you." He paused. "Can I even call him that? Your 'husband'?"

"There are legal documents to prove it. I'm sure one of your lapdogs can retrieve them for you," she retorted.

"Yes, legal documents." Milverton hummed. "I found a rather interesting one earlier this week...Although, not nearly as interesting as a criminal couple, even if you may not be the most romantic."

(Name) glanced at William who didn't seem to pay her any attention apart from the initial surprise she was here despite orders given that she wouldn't.

"It was you, wasn't it?" She asked, her finger trembling on the trigger, her hands uncharacteristically shaky "You who tried to expose me for taking down that trafficking ring, you who had my name plastered over the tabloids, and for what? I didn't do anything to you."

Milverton's eyes darkened for a moment before he grinned again "because it's fun."

"So are theatre productions not good enough for you anymore?" She asked sarcastically.

He laughed. A sickening laugh.

"Why watch a measly play when I can make my own?" He smiled. "Tragedy, comedy, romance...All three seem to apply to your life."

"What—?"

"For example, sweet and innocent nine year old (Name), bright beyond her years, possibly the most intelligent woman, maybe even person, to ever live." Milverton continued, interrupting the woman, a bead of sweet running down her forehead. "A box turns up one day, her dead brother's head inside. How Tragic. She swears to take down the British empire, and has quite a lot of fun in the process. Most of your little boy toys ended up dead or missing, though. It was no coincidence that Theodore Arden, your little male friend, happened to have the father who ordered your brother's grizzly death. And it was no coincidence that they had been tortured to death soon after, aswell as blown up by a few bombs, how comedic."

How did he know this? How did he know any of this? Even with a photographic memory, she still couldn't remember the exact details of all these occurrences, her brain had blocked them out for the most part.

And (name) swore she only brushed over the surface of all this with William. Because she trusted him. She glanced at him, an expression of hurt on her pretty face, then forced her eyes back to Milverton.

Did William tell him?

"And of course, he wasn't the last man in your life, but he was certainly your first." He enunciated the last word, highlighting the double meaning. "I can barely count them on one hand. But then, after a strange disappearance of Lord Ashfordshire, You found the one. How romantic," Milverton looked between (Name) and William. "You were married, but seemingly didn't consummate, and I wasn't the only tabloid following your love life around, but I certainly got the most information. How would your husband," he gestured to William "feel about that?"

"You know nothing." She hissed between clenched teeth.

"Oh? I know nothing, do I?" Milverton chuckled. "For a genius, you make this so easy, my lady. The jokes just write themselves."

William looked uneasy. He had long since settled in his feelings for his wife, which felt ridiculous if he said them out loud. He had confided a few times in his brothers, his friends, and he knew he was in the worst possible circumstance right now. He was in love with. And he was the Lord of crime. The Lord of crime, in love with a girl he originally perceived to be rude and spoilt and cruel and promiscuous.

And he loved her, with his entire soul.

"How would your husband feel, knowing he was likely your last option for a prospective husband? How would your husband feel," Milverton continued, each word leaking venom. "Knowing you only consummated your marriage because a few rumours fuelled your need to become with child?"

William and (Name) made brief eye contact, with her looking at him apologetically. He didn't look at her with anything more than a neutral expression.

"How would your husband feel knowing you had an affair the entire time you were in (home country), towards the end of last year?"

Her gaze could no longer linger on the blond, looking straight at Milverton with a mixture of anger and shame.

William's eyes widened for a moment, waiting for her to say something in her defence.

Nothing.

To the people of The British Empire, I apologise.

I, Lady (Name) (Last Name) Moriarty, have recently discovered something no woman would want to find.

Recently, I had been lead to believe my husband was having an affair, due to the secrets he kept and the life he concealed. This, like most marital issues, was to be kept private. That was until I discovered something far, far worse.

A few days ago, I had caught my husband, William James Moriarty, arriving home late, drenched in blood. Naturally, I was suspicious, and this event had led to me uncovering a truth I cannot keep to myself.

William James Moriarty is the Lord of Crime.

Had I known earlier, perhaps I may have been able to prevent the unjust murders of many innocent people, such as that of Adam Whitely. The guilt I feel is immeasurable, and I intend to financially compensate all those involved as well as provide evidence for this conspiracy to the authorities.

Once again, I apologise for all the harm my ignorance has caused,

Lady (Name) (Last Name).

"I assume this was all fabricated," Mycroft placed the newspaper back on his desk after reading from it aloud.

"You know me so well," (Name) chuckled. "I do intend to repay all those who need it..deep down you don't really have an issue with what transpired. I know you don't." She said, her voice dropping a tone. "William himself asked me to write that, so don't think I'm sacrificing him to save myself."

Mycroft scoffed. "Well you've never had a good history with men and their feelings."

"Why would I? Most of the men who were involved with me in some way were all horrible. It makes no difference that I married a serial killer," she smiled, taking another sip of tea. "I have all I needed now. I won't bother you again, Mycroft dear, I assure you...although you will miss me. I was the only opponent to the British Empire who actually entertained you."

"I don't consider destroying merchant ships entertaining," He recalled. "Or how about that time the new prime minister said something unkind to you and you set Parliament alight?"

"First of all," (Name) defended herself. "I had valid reason for destroying those slave ships, you know very well what trades they're involved in. I'd rather not look away from such devastating practices, there are real people involved, not just figures and statistics," she argued "And second of all, that wasn't the prime minister, they were something else, Home Secretary I think, and they were very offensive to me. You know how I get when I'm angry."

"Well at least he managed to survive." He muttered.

"I've not killed that many people." She retorted.

"I can't even give an exact amount, but most of the people you killed were important people, and it affected our economy, our politics, and our society in multiple ways," Mycroft explained. "Which returns us to the main issue...Your husband — can I even refer to him as such?"

(Name) hummed to herself "Well, I was thinking of having the marriage annulled, but William seems to have other ideas. Regardless, he is, unfortunately, still my husband and the future father of my child."

"I gathered as much. Hopefully they don't inherit your spitefulness." He rolled his eyes. "Anyways, your husband has murdered more nobles than I can recall, some of which we still have yet to confirm. Albert has been vague with me on the issue. What do you suppose you'll do when the economy comes crashing down? What about if the people, the working class population, blame you for their issues? They'll revolt soon, riot around your family home..Now what must you do?"

"They won't blame me if the elite don't do it first. That's how it always happens anyways, blame the marginalised when in reality, it's the rich's fault. The only reason it's causing issue is because the time between the murders has shortened to a mere few hours. Previously, it had been much longer, so another rich old man could fill the void and everyone kept their low paying jobs," she explained. "And the rioting is part of William's plan."

"So that's it? You'll let him die and return to (Home country), have that unfortunate child, then raise it as an heir?" He asked, although she wasn't supposed to answer. "Your life would be so much better if you had married one of her majesty's sons."

"No thanks, they're all hideous," (Name) shook her head, making a face.

Mycroft fought back a laugh, trying to maintain his serious persona. "They are members of the royal family."

"And the inbreeding caused their unfortunate appearances. At least William was handsome. Now I'll have a son with perfect features," She half joked. She did choose William over so many other men because of his superior breeding, which is ironic with his background as a commoner.

"How are you so sure it'll be a boy?" Mycroft asked "wishful thinking?"

"No, I'd much rather a girl, a sweet little girl with beautiful hair I can style, but I know, it's just my intuition. It's never been wrong," (name) flashed a smile.

"No, I suppose not," He nodded "So, you're visiting my brother after I dismiss you?"

"You don't get to dismiss me, but yes, I am." She said. "I need to ask him a favour."

"Very well. We're done here," Mycroft stood up opening the door to his office. "Please keep me updated."

"I shall." She gave him a nod, bowing her head a little before leaving "farewell, and have a nice evening."

Although that morning she had her letter published by the press, 'confessing' her lack of involvement, she knew some would not be entirely convinced. After all, who better to place the blame on than a foreign woman? Yes she was far from innocent, and she didn't exactly want to be perceived as such, only going along with William's plan for the sake of her parents and home country.

So, she decided it would be much less likely that any rioters spot her if she secretly entered Sherlock's apartment, rather than from the front where anyone could see. He had been cleared of his murder charges that same day, now likely at home.

(Name) peered into the window, knocking slowly after a moment. The curtains drew open, revealing a slightly amused Sherlock. He opened the window wide enough for her to enter in her cloaked disguise. She slid inside, walking towards him and pulling her hood down.

"I wasn't expecting you, especially not like this," Sherlock laughed.

"Well, hopefully after all this blows over, you'll expect a lot more from me," she smiled, combing her fingers through her hair.

"Mhm..you're here about Liam, aren't you?" He asked, still remembering the incident with Milverton, but he decided against mentioning it. After the confrontation, ending in Sherlock shooting Milverton, he had heard (name) apologising to William from afar as they left, trying to get him to say something, but merely brushed her off with a claim he was busy.

"I am." (Name) nodded. "I just finished talking to your brother actually, apologising for the whole ordeal."

"Oh yeah, you sent that letter to the papers, right? I could tell most of it wasn't true, no wonder that brother of mine wanted to talk to you," Sherlock said, leaning against a wall. "You knew about this since the beginning."

"And I participated too. William used me as the whistleblower because nobody would expect such things from a woman." She explained, brows furrowing. "Actually, I'm probably worse than he is. Which is why I think it's unfair that he must sacrifice himself, and only himself, for the sake of everyone else. I don't see a crown of thorns on his head, he isn't obliged to do so."

"Classic Liam." He hummed. "So, let me guess. You orchestrated the Arden massacre, and were involved in the disappearance of Ashfordshire?"

"Amongst other things, yes. I also was the main planner with that whole sex trafficking scandal a while back, and I was the one who set us all up on the Noahtic." (Name) confessed.

"They never did find Ashfordshire's body..I assume you killed him though."

She sighed, recalling the story "If you had seen what I had, you'd kill him too. It still haunts me sometimes. And although I did kill him, William dealt with the body. It was so badly damaged and wounded that nobody would recognise it even if they found it."

"How intriguing. You know, (Nickname), I really wish I had met you sooner." Sherlock smiled. She reciprocated it with a bitter one. "So, what is the favour you're planning to ask me?"

"I don't know if Louis has already asked you to do so, he's been on edge all week so it's only reasonable to assume he's upset," She trailed off "I have my own plan, to convince William to stay, maybe just fake his death instead, I'm not entirely sure considering he hasn't been speaking to me much lately..But, if that fails, I want you to be there, when he tries to die. I want you to do everything you can to save him, and I'm sorry for asking so much of you."

"Who's to say I wouldn't do it regardless?" His smile widened.

(Name) let out a dry laugh. "In that case, I haven't anything to worry about.."

"You really love him, don't you?"

She nodded then glanced to the door, footsteps slowly creaking up the stairs. She glanced at Sherlock, nodding goodbye before climbing out the window, gripping onto a tree branch outside as he said his final words to her.

"Congratulations, by the way. That kid's going to be a genius." Sherlock whispered.

She hummed, a little surprised at first that he knew, but shook it off. He was the world's greatest consulting detective after all. She parted her lips to speak, but noticing the door slowly freak open to reveal William, who had yet to spot her whilst she slipped out the window, ready to return to her carriage home.

Once she arrived home, she waited in William's bedroom, that which could have been a shared one between the couple if their marriage had taken a different route. The sheets clearly hadn't been slept in for days, likely due to the recent killing sprees William had been on. Honestly, nobody had slept much recently anyways. (Name) couldn't remember the last time she had gotten in a full 8 hours of sleep without interruptions. She had been plagued by nightmares as of late, and she had too much to do so sleep seemed like a waste of time. She had made arrangements for the following morning to board a ship back to (Home country) with her parents and hopefully with William too. Her room was empty and everything was now packed away and on the ship somewhere.

William eventually returned home, darting straight to his bedroom to clean up, only to be met with (Name) waiting for him. She saw the blood staining his cheek and the tired look in his eyes which once shone so brightly, now making him resemble a corpse rather than the man she had finally come to terms with being the one she loved with all her heart.

"The moon is beautiful tonight, isn't it?"

He didn't respond.

"William?" She called out to him again, approaching him, but strangely enough it seemed there was a boarder preventing her from coming too close. "We need to talk about this whole situation...I.." she bit her lip, voice cracking as she tried to find her words. She felt nervous, reminded about how he reacted after finding out about the affair.

"What?" William muttered softly, albeit exhausted.

(Name) almost seemed startled at how different this current William was to how her usual William was. "I'm somewhat offended you didn't tell me about this plan of yours earlier." She said, although that wasn't really what she intended to do. It was in typical (Name) fashion, in a sense.

William spoke again, his voice aching as he wiped some blood off his face with his palm "You had known this since the beginning, it was in the contract after all..besides, we spoke about this earlier, a few days ago when I asked you to write that letter to the press."

"You're right..my mistake." The noblewoman whispered "The plan was that I either marry again for an heir or have a child and remain a widow." (Name) recalled, stood before William, her hands interlinked as she fidgeted with the fabric of her gloves "But..it's not what I want anymore."

She couldn't help but become incredibly aware of how selfish she continued to sound, with every sentence, every word, every syllable.

"Not what you want?" William repeated curiously. Although he could barely bring himself to speak, he still attempted to keep this conversation afloat, in hopes of completing one of the last phases of this plan, his final problem.

(Name) took a deep breath "You're not dying. I prohibit it," she said harshly, her voice slowly raising, something William noticed happened every time she was frustrated. Once again, she felt selfish, but selfishness may have been the only way to counteract the selfless sacrifice of William dying. "You're not allowed to die like this when there is clearly another way!"

"Another way?" The blond mocked "(name), there is no 'other way'! I have the blood of hundreds on my hands, and the only way to compensate for all the lives I have ruined and all the pain I have caused is by dying!"

(Eye colour) eyes widened momentarily. (Name) took her husband's hands in hers "And you won't let me help you clean these hands?" She asked, kneeling before him as he sat on the bed. "William, please just listen to me for once!" She pleaded, begging him on her knees, an image that (Name) from a year ago would have deemed impossible. "My parents have already heard of what we have done, I spoke to them a few nights ago, and they helped me formulate a plan in which nobody else has to die for the sake of this stupid class system!"

"We..We can run away! We'll go to (home country) with mother and father and...and we can take Albert and Louis and Josephine and everyone else!" (Name) continued, her grasp on his hands tightening "I don't care about the tension between (home country) and this pathetic empire anymore! If any conflict breaks out, I can deal with it! I'll do anything, I just want you by my side. We won't have to worry about anything anymore, William!"

Williams lips parted, then shut, then parted again, as if he was choosing his words cautiously before finally muttering no more than her name, in a whisper so silent that it would be overpowered by the sound of a mere draft, leaking through the window.

"(Name)"

She looked up at him, her eyes glassy with tears that were threatening to spill, another word and the dam would break.

"William, please," (Name) whispered, her voice cracking, squeezing his soft hands gently "I couldn't bare it if you were to die...didn't you consider that? There's so so much to live for, even if the nobility has made you feel otherwise..."

"(Name), please don't do this," He whispered, blinking slowly and opening his eyes once more, the ends of his eyelashes sticking together with shiny tears.

Even being sat there now felt more torturous than any form of pain he had ever felt. William had been hurt so much to the point physical pain had no effect on him anymore. He had been smacked in cruel orphanages, kicked by passers by, cut as a result of both his pride and his namesake's sadistic nature, whipped by his own adoptive mother, and yet he was being caressed so gently, but felt this pain was much more unbearable than anything he'd ever experienced in his twenty four years of pitiful existence.

Seeing (Name), his beloved wife, sat in front of him, begging him to continue to live, something most men around him could do without a second thought (which he felt envious of, and then guilt for his envy), was devastating.

He had considered her proposal, imagining a life where he and (name) could exist peacefully. They could read at one of the many libraries in the (Last Name) Manor, whilst (name) would teach him (mother tongue), and be by her side on her travels to various countries. He'd play chess with (name) until she finally won against him. He's finally be able to sleep peacefully in her arms without fear for his comrades and nightmares riddled with guilt. He'd live a life without needing to stain his hands with a single drop of blood again...

And yet he couldn't.

The more William imagined a future with her, the more it hurt knowing this was simply impossible for him to have. He wasn't allowed to be happy. He wasn't allowed to move on. He had killed too many, there was no turning back, no matter how badly he wanted to do so. It was cowardly, William knew that, but so was running away and leaving England in shambles because of his own selfish plans.

"Don't you understand, William? I'll do anything.." (Name) looked into his eyes once more "I.." she took a deep breath, voice shaky

"I love you."

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