#���wow that really bothered you” “yep (refuses to elaborate)”

[ratatatastic]

"When you guys are playing and, like, we all got podcasts and there are big podcasts out there, you know, are going from series to series, and they're critiquing teams and what not—like, at the end, do you know who's chirping you? Do you pay attention to that shit? Do you know who's on your side? Do you know who's, you know, rooting against you? Do you guys pay attention to that kind-of stuff? I'm just curious." "Yeah, I think this might be the first podcast I've ever done—I'm not the biggest fan of podcasts to be honest. I think—I'm friends with that, you know, [Shane] O'Brien, and [Scottie] Upshall (2 out of the 3 cohosts of the Missin' Curfew podcast), I love those guys... so if they ask I would do it but... again they, I think—I think negativity flows through media so much that it just kind-of disgusts me and I want nothing to do with it to be honest. So I hate the negativity, I think it's crazy, I think negativity in media steers guys away from certain teams... it's like, 'Why do you want that?' right? So I don't know, I'm a huge fan of the positivity, finding the positives in players and not putting guys down especially in podcasts and stuff like that where it should be for the players, right? It should be a positive thing, something that we rally around. Especially as ex-players!" "Yeah! We're gonna pump your tires!" "That's it!" "Well, you still gotta be real though!" "No, I know!" "You know if you have a bad game—" "It's gotta be real! For sure!" "—You gotta be real! You can't fake out your audience either so it's still a business." "One hundred percent! One hundred percent, one hundred percent... and I get that but—Yeah, I mean, I saw all those Spittin' Chiclets guys all over Edmonton's bandwagon so..." "That really bothered you guys, eh? Like, I mean, you guys were paying attention to that. I mean, as evidence as well on what took place on the ice after the game... you guys weren't, like, fucking around, you were being serious, right? You guys—that really bothered you guys?" "Hundred percent." "What was it? Like, the most that bothered you about it? Just the fact that, 'Hey, you guys are rooting for them... why are you trying to celebrate with us?' I mean, was it—is it that simple?" "Exactly. Yeah, get the f—we won, get off... right? Get out of here. That's uh, yeah. I don't know, I don't want to be too controversial or anything like that. I'm a happy guy, I like everybody so... whatever." "They're all good dudes, man. Listen if they're into hockey and they're talking about hockey thats a positive one way or the other!" "Oh, they're growing the game! They're growing the game! Huge! And they're doing a great job and I've spoke with Biz [Paul Bissonnette] a few times and I know Whit [Ryan Whitney] (Cohosts of Spittin' Chiclets) and I've got no issues with any of 'em. Truly."

The Cam & Strick Podcast | 7.30.24 (x)

[rainydaydream-gal18]

Steve Rogers x Reader: The Nutcracker(AU) Part 3

(Warning, these are long)

 An hour or so later; you, Steve, and Natasha were on the road.  You wore a warm winter outfit and a thick coat over it with a hat and mittens.  And what do you know?  Trudging through the snow with actual winter boots made it a much better experience.  Natasha was dressed similarly, and Steve, well, he didn’t exactly need any winter gear in his nutcracker state.  Must be nice not having to worry about getting cold.

   It was hours of trekking through the snow.  You passed the time with word games and asking questions about the kingdom. Natasha and Steve enjoyed it.  They asked you questions in return about your life back home.  It was a learning experience for everyone.

   As the three of you approached the frozen lake, it seemed so vast.  One thing you hadn’t noticed before was the little cabin perched right at the shore.  Smoke rose from the chimney, and you were reminded of the quaint town you had left behind.

   “Oh great,” Steve muttered, stopping at the top of a hill.  “I forgot.”

   You glanced at him.  “What?”

   Natasha smirked at you.  “An old friend of ours lives in that cabin.”

   “He and I didn’t always agree on things,” Steve elaborated.  “He refused to stay at the Royal Garden Inn with everyone else after the Mouse King raided the castle.  Likes his space.”

   “Castle?”

   “Yeah, you could say I used to work there.  Like Romanoff.”

   “Ohh, I see,” you adjusted your coat.  “So, what does this mean?  Are we still able to cross the lake?”

   “Not without Tony’s help.”

   “Tony?” your brows rose incredulously.  “As in Tony Stark?”

   “Yes, the famous inventor,” Steve confirmed.  “At least, he’s famous here.  How did you know?”

   “Oh,” you shrugged.  “It’s a long story.  But for now, let’s just pretend I overheard something about him at the inn.”

   “Alright then.”  Steve shook his head.  “Either way, I was really hoping I wouldn’t have to run into him again.  Not looking like this.  Tony’s going to have a field day.”

   Knowing what Tony was like in the Avengers movies, your Captain America nutcracker was certainly right.  However, if he said that the three of you couldn’t cross the lake without him, he would have to deal with it.  In reality, you were excited to meet the character in this world!

   - - - -

   You, Natasha, and Steve stood at the doorway to the log cabin.  Steve and Nat exchanged looks as if daring the other to knock. You shrugged and knocked a few times without hesitation.  Steve sucked in a breath, and Natasha looked like she was trying to hold back a smirk.

   The door opened, and there he was.  Tony stood there, brown eyes staring down the three of you.  His gaze rested on Steve before he burst into laughter, hands on his stomach as he roared.

   “Really, Tony…” Steve grumbled.  “It’s been a while since we saw each other, and this is how you want to go about this?”

   “Hey,” the inventor chuckled.  “You show up on my door looking like that and expect me to act like nothing’s up?  It’s fair game, Cap, and you know it.”

   “Alright, alright.  Have at it.”

   “So, what’s your plan?  Chop your arm off if you need firewood?”

   “Theeere it is,” Steve sighed.  

   You shook your head, though you were unable to hide a smile, as you interjected.  “Come on, guys, let’s try and grow up.”  

   Tony’s laughter died down, and his expression became more skeptical as he looked to you.  “And who are you?  I don’t think we’ve met.  Friend of the Royal Highness, I presume?”

   “What?” You tipped your head to one side.  “No, I’ve never met this prince that everyone keeps talking about.”

   “Um, yes you have.”

   “Tony, don’t,” Steve warned.

   “I never took you for the type to not flaunt your royal status.  You had no trouble doing that at the palace.”

              “Look, I never wanted to ‘flaunt’ my royalty.  There were some people who seemed to forget that I was the one in charge of running the kingdom, and they wanted to do things their way.  I had to remind them from time to time.”

   “Wait, what’s going on?” you questioned.  “Steve?  Are you the prince?”

   Steve looked at you and nodded.  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you at first.  I intended to.”

   “It’s fine, I mean, it doesn’t really make a difference,” you explained.  “But what does bother me is we’re having this discussion out in the cold.”

   Tony shrugged and stepped aside so the three of you could file in.  His cabin was basically a steampunk workshop with odd devices scattered about and hanging on the walls.  There was even a steampunk Ironman suit in the corner.

   “Thanks, Tony,” Natasha said.  “Now, we didn’t come here so you could make fun of Prince Steve.  We’re actually trying to cross the frozen lake to-”

   “To find the Sugarplum princess.”  Tony rolled his eyes. “You’re not the first.  There’s no proof that she even exists other than some ruins where a castle used to be.”

   “Well, that’s something,” Steve grasped onto that hope.  “___________ and I need to get there and turn back into our original forms.”

   Tony looked at you.  “What happened to you?  You look fine to me.”

   “The Mouse King shrunk me in my world.”

   “Oh, gotcha.”  He stroked his beard as he contemplated this.  “I’ve got just the thing to help you lot across the lake.  It’s in the workshop out back.  Believe or not, I made the finishing touches last night.”

   “Wow perfect,” Nat said.  “You know, we could use that brain of yours.”

   “Yeah, I’m sure you could,” Tony plopped down in a couch and put his feet up on the coffee table in front of it.  “But I’m sure Prince Stevie wouldn’t want me coming along.”

   “Actually,” Steve spoke up.  “Nat’s right.  We could really use you on the team, Tony.”

   Tony’s brows rose in surprise.  “Isn’t this a pleasant surprise?  Cap needs my help.”

   “Wait, why do you call him Cap if he’s the prince?” You asked.  “Not to change the subject or anything.”

   Tony chuckled.  “It’s short for Captain of the Guard.  That’s what he used to be before he was granted Prince status by the kingdom.”

   “Ohh, I see.” 

   “Anyway,” Tony continued.  “You sure you want someone with different ideas than you along on the trip?”

   “Tony, it never bothered me that you have different ideas.  Yes, we are very different.  Polar opposites.  But you’re a smart man, and we need you.  The sooner we find the Sugarplum Princess, the sooner me and ___________ can get changed back and maybe even get help taking down the Mouse King.  Then we can all take our rightful place in the palace again.  You get your old workshop back.  Nat and the rest of the guard resume their post.”

   “And you get your nice throne back wrapped up with a pretty bow,” Tony stated, a hint of irritation in his tone.  

   “I’m going to do things a little differently,” Steve said.  “There’s no way I’m letting someone like the Mouse King get through again.”

   “Well, what can I say, Cap?” he shrugged.  “I guess I’m in.”

   “But Tony, you have to- Wait, you’re in?” Steve asked.  

   “Yep.  Let’s do this thang.”

    - - - -

   “Wow, Tony, you’ve really outdone yourself,” Natasha complimented, giving the horseless sleigh a pat with a gloved hand.  “You sure this thing will get us there in one piece?”

   “Oh yeah.  This baby is pretty fast.  In theory, that is.”

   “You haven’t tested it yet?” Steve asked.  “You know what? I don’t even want to know.”

   “Well, what are you all waiting for? Christmas?  Get in, and let’s get rolling,” Tony ushered you inside.  Steve volunteered as tribute and jumped in first, reaching out a hand to help you.

   “I hope this thing doesn’t blow up in my face,” you grumbled, climbing in.  It was a casual display of chivalry, but you got bashful as Steve helped you into the spot next to him.

   “If it does, it’ll have to go through me first,” he assured you.

   “You’ll just feed the fire,” Tony pointed out with a shrug.

   “Don’t say that!” Nat gave him a slap with her hat.  

   Tony raised his hands defensively.  “What? He’s literally made of wood!”

   You rolled your eyes and hugged your knees to your chest as the inventor started up the engine.  It sounded like a few gunshots going off before the sleigh shook violently for a moment, and then the whole thing shut off.  After a few more starts, the sleigh finally roared to life.  

   “Woohoo!” you exclaimed.  Then, your mood quickly changed when you happened to glance over your shoulder and see the Mouse King and several of his minions racing across Tony’s backyard towards where you all were at the edge of the lake.  “Um, guys?”

   Tony’s eyes followed where you were pointing.  “Looks like we got this thing started just in time.  Mouse Guy and his boys are on their way.” He shifted gears, and the sleigh took off flying onto the frozen lake, spraying snow and ice everywhere.  “Thaaat’s right, chitauri. Eat my dust.”  Tony shifted another gear, and the sleigh picked up speed.  Just like that, the chitauri looked like ants in the distance, growing smaller and smaller behind you.  With the danger evaded, you took a moment to enjoy the feel of the wind in your hair.  It was ice-cold, but was still a lot of fun.

   “This is awesome!” you exclaimed.

   “Oh, you want to see awesome?” Tony smirked.

   “No, Tony,” Steve scolded.  “Do not start doing donuts on the frozen lake.  We have a destination to get to!”

   Surprise, surprise.  Tony did a few donuts anyway.  You noticed Steve’s irritation melt away when he looked over at your grinning face.

   Next thing you knew, the sleigh engine began to sputter mid-donut.  Your smile quickly vanished.  The group hadn’t made it across the lake yet.  If the engine gave out now, it could be problematic.  It revved once or twice, and then it finally just died.

   Tony looked at Steve.  Steve looked at Tony.

   “You’ve got to be kidding me, Stark,” Steve complained, face-palming.

   “Hey, I barely had a chance to test it before.  We were bound to run into issues anyway.”

   “But you didn’t have to push it like that…”

   As the two of them began arguing, you and Natasha exchanged looks and shook your heads.  “Looks like we’re camping out on the lake,” she said. “With all due respect, Prince Steve, I think you two should stop fighting and start getting ready for when the temperature drops.  You do have an emergency kit in this thing, right Stark?”

   “Of course I do,” Tony replied.  “There are a few compartments under the seats with firewood, blankets, and some snacks.  It should be more than enough for a few nights.  Worst case scenario, if we run out of firewood, we can throw one of Cap’s arms in there.”

   Unamused by his comment, you reached under the seat and found the blankets.  Then, Steve and Tony started hauling out firewood and piling it up.

   “We’re fortunate to have left the Mouse King in the dust,” Tony commented.  “You don’t think they’ll come after us out here, do you?”

   “No,” Nat stated.  “He’s too much of a coward.  And even if he did, it would take them a while before they could reach us.  We went pretty fast.”

   “That’s good to know,” you said, watching as she pulled out flint and steel and lit the fire.  “Also...why are we building a fire on the ice?  Won’t it melt?”

   The scientist of the group spoke up immediately.  “Interestingly, no. Fire burns upward, so it won’t melt the ice.  Plus the ash creates a sort of bedding around the fire to keep it from hitting the ice too.”

   “Oh wow, that’s pretty cool.  And comforting.”  You sighed, spreading out a blanket to sit on beside the fire.  “If it weren’t so freaking cold out, I’d really enjoy this more.”

   “Tell me about it,” Tony agreed.

   Steve sat down beside you and put an extra blanket over your shoulders.  Nat glanced at him, and then smirked at you knowingly.  Tony didn’t miss the moment.

   “You’re being as gentlemanly as ever, Cap.  What’s up?”

   Steve stared at him.  “What?”

   “Nothing, I just noticed you’re being extra attentive.”

   You wanted to crawl back into the sleigh for the night and disappear.  Steve just met Tony’s gaze sternly, and thankfully, nothing more was said on the subject.  You also saw Nat elbow Tony out of the corner of your eye.

   As the night drew on, the temperature did indeed drop.  A lot. You thought it was cold before, yikes, you had no idea what was coming.  Fortunately, the fire helped a lot.  Tony passed out, and Nat drifted in and out of sleep a few times.  You could tell she was a light sleeper, probably from being a soldier-spy.  Soon enough it was just you and Steve awake.  How conveniently romantic.  It wasn’t though.  Actually, it was a little awkward at first.  Neither of you said anything for a few.  Finally, he looked over at you.

   “You warm enough?”

   You tore your eyes from the warm glow of the fire and met his blue ones.  “Yeah, I suppose.”

   “I know it may not be much help, but come here.”  He opened his arms a bit so you could sit right up against him, and you obliged.  You expected it to be like sitting against a wall or a wooden dresser, but strangely, it was comforting.  It was safe, and perhaps you imagined it, but it was a little warmer.

   “Thank you, that’s actually much better,” you told him.

   “I’m glad.”  He ran his hand up and down your back, as if hoping the friction would bring you more warmth.  “I’m sorry we were delayed another day.”

   “It’s fine.  Things happen,” you chuckled, shooting a glance at sleeping Tony.  “Either way, I’m just glad we’re all safe and sound.  Cold, but safe.”

   “Me too,” he agreed.  “Soon we’ll find the Sugarplum princess, and you and I can go back to normal.”

   “So she seems cool,” you concluded.  “What else do you know about her?”

   “They say she’s very beautiful, kind, and compassionate,” he continued, eyes softening.  You recognized a pang of jealousy in your chest and a weird twisted feeling in your stomach. Would Steve fall for her?  His hero?  The one who would change him back and restore the kingdom?  

   “That’s cool,” you said, not wanting to dig any deeper on that matter. “I do have another question for you. Why did you not want to tell me you were the prince?”

   “Oh, that,” Steve scratched the back of his head.  “I didn’t want you look down on me for letting my kingdom get overrun by the Mouse King.  That, and also because I didn’t want you to see me any different if I was a prince.”

   “Me?  Look down on you? Never.  And to be honest, you’re a superhero in my world, so any star-struck behavior on my part has already passed.  Finding out you are the prince here didn’t really change how I feel about you.”  

   He smiled.  “That’s good to know.  You’re amazing, you know that?”

   You looked up at him, a mixture of surprise and warmth in your eyes. “Thank you.  I wouldn’t say ‘amazing’ exactly, but I appreciate it.”

   “Well, you are.”

   The two of you continued your conversations, talking about random things.  It was a different experience getting to know Steve versus seeing him on the big screen.  Since he was a prince of a kingdom here, there were some obvious differences.  But he still had the same calm demeanor, selflessness, and kindness.

   You awoke to Natasha gently nudging you.  You weren’t sure at what point you had drifted off to sleep last night. You awoke a few times, missing your home and wondering if they were worried about you.  After tossing and turning a bit, you must have fallen asleep.

   “Good morning, sleepy-head.”

   “Good morning,” you yawned.  Tony and Steve were already getting the sleigh loaded.  “We’re leaving already?”

   “Yeah, Steve insisted we let you sleep a bit.  He said you had a rough night.  You okay?”

   You nodded.  “I guess I was a little homesick is all.  I’m good, though.  Thanks.”

   “Glad to hear you’re better,” she helped you pack up the blankets.  Boy, it wasn’t nearly as cold as it had been last night, but it still wasn’t the most pleasant.  “Stark managed to get the sleigh working again.  It was quite the ordeal.  I’m surprised you slept through it.”

   “Wowzers, well I’m glad we don’t have to walk the rest of the way.”

   “I’d have to kill Tony if that were the case.” Nat lifted a brow, and you had a feeling she might be only half-kidding.  You hopped into the sleigh in the same spot next to Steve, and Nat and Tony got in shortly after.  Tony started it up, and you were off!

    It was a while before the island came into view.  Upon arrival, Tony was sure to park the sleigh out of sight just in case the Mouse King showed up.  It was very doubtful, but you never know.  Taking a look around, you realized Fury had been right.  The only thing left of the Sugarplum Princess’ castle was ruins. It was snowy and beautiful like the rest of the land here, but nothing seemed particularly interesting about it.

   At least, not at first.

PART 4 (FINAL PART)

[hermannsthumb]

Okay, but if Newt's the sexy mechanic, then Hermann's the sexy tech guy. Newt will come up to Hermann like "Dr. Gottlieb, my laptop is having some issues. Could you maybe take a look at it, please?" "Newton, I know full well this is a problem you can fix easily." "PLEASE, Dr. Gottlieb? I'd just feel SO much better if someone like ~*you*~ would look at it."

see i saw this ask and automatically decided you meant “tech guy hermann au that’s not even sexy” and ran with it so thank you for enabling me :)

Hermann is not officially campus technology support, nor, technically, is it something he’d even supposed to be consulting in without the proper university-sanctioned credentials, but the technology support they used to have was so bloody awful that half the time computers came back in worse shape than they were going in, so around six months ago Hermann simply...decided to take matters into his own hands. A coup d’état, so to speak. When he’s not lecturing on astrophysics, or lecturing on advanced mathematics, or holding office hours, Hermann’s consulting in technology services and training the undergraduates there via workstudy how to properly do their jobs. 

They’ve had a marked rise in consultations since Hermann took over, which Hermann supposes is to be expected as a side effect of competence.

They’ve had a marked rise in consultations with one man in particular.

Dr. Geiszler is the head of the biology department, lectures in both biochemistry and engineering, and--if rumors are to be believed--completed grad school in his teen years and has at least six PhDs to show for it. By all accounts, he’s a veritable genius. It’s why, for the life of him, Hermann cannot figure out why Dr. Geiszler has come to technology services more times than Hermann can count in the past three weeks.

The first time was understandable: Dr. Geiszler burst into the office shouting, frantically, about how his computer crashed and he lost nearly twenty-five student assignments, so Hermann--pitying him, one educator to another--sat him down and took care of it himself. After that, it was less understandable. Dr. Geiszler’s computer was making a weird noise and he didn’t know why. Dr. Geiszler somehow managed to uninstall his trackpad. Dr. Geiszler accidentally deleted all of his shortcut icons for applications. Dr. Geiszler was sure his wifi was broken, until Hermann pointed out he’d merely turned his laptop’s internet connection off. Dr. Geiszler forgot how to change his desktop background.

Today, when Hermann sees that familiar, scruffy, bespectacled head poking over the counter of the front desk, he does not even bother logging Dr. Geiszler into their appointment system, just sighs and motions him back.

“Hiya, Hermann,” Geiszler says, dropping into the swivel chair next to Hermann but refusing to sit in it properly, simply straddling it backwards. “How’s it going?” Hermann does not, truthfully, mind Dr. Geiszler’s complete lack of professionalism, nor the fact that he bypasses titles and simply calls Hermann by his first name, but Hermann feels as if he ought to put up a front and makes a face every time anyway.

“What have you done today?” Hermann says, and Geiszler laughs weakly before pulling his laptop out of a tote bag that’s more enamel pins than fabric.

“Would you believe it?” Geiszler says. “I managed to delete my email account.”

Geiszler did not, actually, delete his email account--he’d merely logged out of it--and once Hermann shows him this in five minutes Geiszler shakes his head in amazement (like Hermann cured cancer on the spot and not, in fact, merely entered “gmail” into the search bar). “Wow, Hermann,” he says. “You’re so good with computers. I wish I could be that good.”

“You have a doctorate in engineering,” Hermann says.

“And you’re still better than me at this shit,” Geiszler says, and then pats Hermann’s arm like he’s congratulating him. “Congratulations. That’s pretty impressive, dude.” He does not remove his hand. Geiszler has tattoos, Hermann notices. Geiszler also has very strong hands.

Hermann clears his throat. “Dr. Geiszler,” he begins, and Geiszler shakes his head and smiles.

“Just call me Newt,” he says, and squeezes Hermann’s arm lightly, companionably.

“Newton,” Hermann corrects (because he refuses to use that nickname), face heating up for unknown reasons, “I have another appointment, so if you would--”

Newton drops his hand. “Right,” he says. “Sorry.”

Hermann finishes up for the afternoon at one so as to be on time for the lecture he’s got to give at one-thirty, but he’s stopped by the sophomore Physics major who works the front desk on his way out the door. “Just so you know, Dr. Gottlieb,” she says, and Hermann swivels on his cane, “Dr. Geiszler’s almost exceeded his maximum allotted amount of appointments for the month.”

Hermann pulls his glasses up to peer over her shoulder at her computer screen, where she’s pulled up Newton’s data profile; sure enough, Newton has stopped by tech services ten times since January. Eleven times, if Hermann would’ve logged him in today. The maximum they allow per month is twelve, but Hermann can’t remember the last time they had someone make more than four. Newton is a special case. “Should I send him a warning email?” the sophomore says.

“No,” Hermann says. “Don’t bother with the limit for Dr. Geiszler.” He doesn’t imagine Newton’ll pay much attention to the warning, anyway, just plead with Hermann for an appointment until Hermann finally caves in. “You can simply automatically assign him with me.”

A new email pops up in the corner of the front desk’s PC; it’s from Dr. Geiszler. After Hermann nods at her, the girl opens it. “Dr. Geiszler’s requested another appointment with you tomorrow,” she says. “He says...his speakers aren’t working.”

Hermann narrows his eyes. “He requested me?”

“He usually does,” the girl says, and scrolls through the tech services email inbox until she finds a folder marked ‘Dr. Geiszler’ (made at Hermann’s behest). At least eight emails, all after that very first appointment with Hermann, all requesting an appointment with--at first--the full honorary title Dr. Gottlieb, and then devolving into Hermann. “I made him an appointment with someone else one time and he cancelled it.”

“I see,” Hermann says, frowning and--to his surprise--mildly embarrassed. “Yes. Ah. Thank you.”

He hurries out.

When Newton shows up for his appointment the next morning--“I don’t know what I did, Hermann, but the sound just stopped working!”--and it turns out to be yet another easy fix (he had his computer on mute), Hermann decides he’s had enough. “Newton,” he says. “I know full well this was a problem you could’ve fixed easily. All of your problems have been problems you could’ve fixed easily.”

“Yeah,” Newton says quickly, “but, uh, I just feel better having someone like you look at--”

Hermann holds up his hand and cuts him off. “Why are you really here?”

He expects Newton will make some elaborate excuse, but to his surprise, Newton quickly drops his clueless act, shrugs, and grins. “You wanna get dinner?” he says.

“Dinner?”

“With me,” Newton adds. “And on me. If that wasn’t clear.”

“That is,” Hermann splutters, because his first instinct was to give an enthusiastic yes (Newton is messy and scruffy and infuriatingly attractive) but he thinks, reasonably, he should play at least somewhat hard to get, “I don’t. This whole time--?”

“Yep,” Newton says.

“That’s a horrendous abuse of campus resources,” Hermann says, though the past month suddenly makes a great deal more sense, and then, to Newton’s obvious glee, “Oh, yes. Alright. Dinner.”

Newton continues making appointments, but he and Hermann usually spend them in far more conductive ways after that: Hermann’s office is private, after all.

[fullmetalirin]

Fullmetal Alchemist OG vs. Brotherhood: Greed’s Demise (OG 34, BH 14)

We're finally here: the divergence point.

FMA Brotherhood Episode 14: "Those Who Lurk Underground"

Bradley and Armstrong lead a team of state military soldiers to raid Greed's hideout, although Bradley uses it as cover to hunt for Greed. Bradley goes into the sewage passageway beneath the hideout and duels with Greed. Surprised by the abilities of Bradley the Führer, Greed is severely weakened by Bradley who reveals his true identity as Wrath. Roa and Dolcetto attempt to save Greed, but are killed by the Führer. Martel, who is still inside Alphonse, attempts to choke Bradley to death with Alphonse's armor, but she is stabbed by Bradley. Her blood splashes on Alphonse's blood seal and unlocks his forgotten memories. Later, Alphonse reveals to Edward that he managed to recover his former memories, prior to their failed attempt at human transmutation to revive their mother. Greed is taken as a captive to Father, who was disappointed in him after he deserted the rest of the homunculi. When Greed refuses to rejoin the homunculi, he is melted alive to a liquid philosopher's stone, which is then consumed by Father.

We open with MUSTANG because of course we do. He is bothered by peoples' perceptions of him, except he smirks after thinking about them, so I guess not? He reports to the Fuhrer's secretary, who is not important in this continuity, and learns that he's traveled to the south.

The chimeras are taking Al through the sewers. Roa sniffs to find the way.

We cut to Bradley leading a raid on the Devil's Nest.

Greed decides to run away. LOL.

They prepare to chase after him, but Izumi starts vomiting, played absurdly comedically. Life-threatening illnesses during serious battles, so hilarious!!!

Cut to Al struggling with Martel. Where did the others go?

Al looks stunned when Martel lifts his helmet off, but he's been able to move without it before.

Roa and Dolcetto apparently left to find an escape route?

And suddenly Bradley shows up. How did he get here so fast?

Bradley tells the air that he's 60 and his body has started to slow down with age, so he wants to get this done quickly so he can go home. I guess he just likes grandstanding, or he likes bragging about being a special homunculi?

Bradley attacks and it's villain sue time. Despite clearly being several steps away in the previous shot, he's able to instantly slice off Greed's hand as soon as he starts hardening. From there, he just keeps cutting Greed's hands off with his swords that are, I dunno, adamantium given they can cut clean through bone repeatedly without damage. Since Greed can't harden and regenerate, and apparently can't harden unless he's fully healed, Greed is totally helpless during this time.

We cut to Armstrong fighting Dolcetto. He transmutes Dolcetto's hammer into a statue of himself, because Armstrong. Even the statue has bishie sparkles. LOL. Dolcetto throws it away and switches to fisticuffs.

Dolcetto hulks out and… grows horns. I don't think splicing alchemy should work that way. It's pretty clearly only merging existing parts together, not letting you transform at will.

We cut to soldiers gunning down chimeras.

Dolcetto manages to hit Armstrong hard enough to make him bleed.

Armstrong tells him to surrender, but the military show up and shoot at him. His beefy fists can block bullets, apparently. Roa slices through some but not all of the soldiers, who proceed to… somehow completely miss him despite shooting tons of bullets in his direction.

Greed knocks Bradley's eyepatch off and he namedrops the Ultimate Eye. He says it is the reason he was able to dodge bullets on the battlefield and survive long enough to be promoted to his current position. So… Father didn't just install him? What's the point of making a country if you have to appoint your puppet kings through legitimate channels?

Bradley asks how many more times Greed has to be killed before he dies, foreshadowing that their regeneration can be exhausted and also that all future homunculi battles are just going to be people punching them for ages until the author decides they run out of HP.

Martel sees Bradley continuing to just wail on Greed and freaks out. Al tries to keep her hidden.

Roa and Dolcetto show up. Roa does have some bullet wounds, so I guess some did land. He… cuts Al's chains… with his sword that I guess is also adamantium… and tells him to get Martel to safety.

Martel demands Al let her out so she can fight.

Bradley cuts Roa cleanly in half with his magic swords.

Greed taunts Bradley while he's still regenerating because, I dunno, he figures he's going to die anyway? His hand takes ridiculously long to regenerate compared to his brain, which you'd think would be more complex.

Greed gives a speech about how while he's not attached to the chimeras, they're his possessions and he doesn't like Bradley wrecking his stuff.

Greed starts hardening and Bradley charges forward again with super speed. So in addition to being able to dodge bullets and cut through anything, he has super speed so he is not even limited by the range of his magic swords. Greed actually does successfully block the attack, but stops hardening because…?

Bradley stabs Greed, which incapacitates him even though Lust is never knocked unconscious despite explicitly being on her last life later because what is consistency.

Al tries to run away but Martel tries to strangle Bradley, because the irrational woman is too overcome with grief to not immediately jump for the suicide attack.

Bradley is totally unaffected by the strangling even though he is not supposed to have homunculi endurance and stabs Martel to death. It looks really weird; he just sticks the sword in and then blood gushes out all at once.

Some of the blood splatters on Al's bloodseal and this activates his memories of the Gate because…? He did not get knowledge of human transmutation either, so methinks the theory that you get more for paying more is bunk. We then get a shot of him in the created body, implying that thing didn't have a soul to begin with. More on that later.

Then we cut to Al waking up outside. Ed is bandaged and injured. Al says Ed's covered in blood, and then we look down and see Al is too. I think that's an effective sequence.

Al has a breakdown over being unable to save Martel. Ed tries to tell him it'll be okay but it doesn't work.

Bradley shows up to be evil and intimidating. He wants to know if Ed made any deals with Greed, because…? I guess maybe he's worried Greed spilled the beans about Father's plan. But he has no way of knowing if Ed is lying here (unless that's also covered by the Ultimate Sue Eye), so this doesn't seem to accomplish anything but telling Ed he has something to hide. Bradley also asks them if they did human transmutation, which the homunculi must already know if he's already marked for sacrifice, so again this is just giving Ed information.

Bradley offers Izumi a position as State Alchemist. She gets out of it by saying she's just a housewife, but Bradley pointedly says he will return to see if she's changed her mind. Why not just do whatever coercion he has planned now? He has a regiment of soldiers outside already.

Ed mentions he told Hughes about the homunculi. Armstrong gets weird and tells him to be cautious, but nothing more.

Now Al explains his memories have come back. He echoes their earlier cartoon pose about it being awful. He says he didn't learn anything about human transmutation, so it's useless and accomplished nothing. YEP IT SURE DID. The only difference is that now he can do circleless alchemy, because combat upgrades are what really matter.

The brothers then rationally examine how strange it is that the military massacred everyone instead of capturing them for interrogation, and why the Fuhrer came down for such a small operation. Ed says he guesses they'll stick with the military for a while, implying he plans to leave eventually, because military dictatorships will totally let you walk away whenever you want.

Then we get the scene with Father. It is pretty useful to explicitly run over all the homunculi so we can confirm what we know so far. Greed asks why Sloth is missing and we get a shot of him digging the tunnels, foreshadowing that. Why doesn't he ask about Pride, though?

Bradley is apparently new, so was there just not a Wrath before? Greed notes that an aging homunculi is special.

Envy gets mad at being called ugly. The envy demon is vain, geddit, wow such deep symbolism here.

Envy looks more muscular here, more brawler and less prettyboy.

Greed nearly goads Envy into revealing his "true form", but Father stops them. So that's tantalizing us for a future reveal.

Father sits in a chair connected to a bunch of pipes.

Father asks why Greed betrayed him and left, and Greed just says he's only behaving how he was created: greedy. Why is Father purposefully creating things based around fatal flaws?

Greed refuses to return to Father's employ. Father activates some clockwork contraption that lowers Greed into a crucible. As he's melted down, his Philosopher's Stone is extracted into… wine? that Father drinks, using some complicated distillation apparatus. He does realize you get holdup in every step of a process, right? He is losing Philosopher's Stone material every time he does this.

Greed's chains melt as he enters the crucible, but not Bradley's swords. So I guess they really are adamantium.

This is all just way too over-the-top for me. Why does Father need this elaborate getup? It's… intimidating? I guess? But there doesn't seem to actually be much point to it. It's a lot of pretty cruft with no real purpose.

Then we cut to Bradley talking with his family. His wife says he should retire, then Selim nerds out about how Ed is so cool and he wants to learn alchemy so he can help out his dad. I don't… I don't even. Why is Pride doing this. Is he just screwing with Bradley? Does he get off on pretending to be an innocent kid? Is the wife not in on any of this? How did the wife not know she gave birth to a freaky shadow monster? I'm not entirely clear on the mechanics of Pride so I guess I'll have to watch his intro episode later, but this looks really bizarre to me.

Fullmetal Alchemist Episode 34: "Theory of Avarice"

Archer has Edward as well as Izumi and Sig Curtis in custody. Archer reinstates Tucker as a state alchemist under his command and orders his men to take no prisoners hunting down Greed and his associates. As Greed tries to escape with his cohorts, Strongarm burst through the wall and battles with Law until Law collapses the wall, ensuring the group's escape. While Greed and co. recover in a small shack, Lust and Gluttony appear. Dolcetto and Law unwaveringly step up and sacrifice themselves allowing Greed, Al, and Marta (who is still inside of Al's armor) to escape. In a forest, Greed instructs Al to wait for him until sunrise, and for Marta to watch after him while he goes to take care of business. Marta realizes he is headed for Dante's house and tries to go after him, but Al refuses to allow her to do so. When Greed arrives at Dante's, he is greeted by Lyra, who knows his purpose for returning to Dante's. She guides him to a parlor, where he discovers Dante's body split down the middle, seemingly by a sword, and a complex alchemy circle on the ceiling and floor. Before he has time to react, Lyra uses alchemy to forcibly eject the Philosopher's Stone fragments that Greed has consumed in his life. She exits, leaving him in pain, as Ed enters. Shocked at Dante's corpse, he blames her death on Greed. While they fight, Ed discovers the secret to his human shield through logic, and uses alchemy to undo it. He manages to stab Greed in through the chest, which surprisingly causes Greed to collapse in pain. Greed explains to Edward that the only way to kill a homunculus without its regeneration is to physically murder one near the human remains that it was created with, and he also reveals that he let Al go. Greed departs this information with Ed in hopes of ensuring the deaths of the rest of the homunculi, and then he dies, much to the shock of Ed who has never killed before. At sunrise, Marta gets up and leaves Al, knowing that Greed isn't returning. The brothers reunite and, together with Winry, Izumi, and Sig, bury Greed and Dante. They bid Izumi and Sig goodbye, saying they will next find the Ishbalans.

Winry sulks in the meat shop, hoping for a call from Ed.

Archer orders the military to gun down anyone who opposes them. We helpfully get an internal monologue where he thinks he can make as many of them as he wants if he has Tucker, and Greed can't lay a hand on him as long as he has the skull. (So I guess Kimblee did tell him about the weakness?) Eh, kinda tacky. I don't like actually getting into characters' heads for exposition, it's too blunt. It's much more effective when the audience can piece these things together from context clues.

Bido is seen bleeding out in the sewer.

The military guns down chimeras. They catch up to Greed, and Roa stays behind to buy them time. Armstrong cuts them off, and demands they return Al.

Lust says Sloth was responsible for letting Greed escape?

Armstrong's battle with Dolcetto is similar, but the statue doesn't get bishie sparkles. How sad. Armstrong also does not bleed from getting smashed into the wall.

After the battle, Dolcetto caves in the tunnel and escapes with Greed.

We cut to the bar. Soldiers have killed all the patrons. Outside, Ed has slipped off and put dummies in the cloaks.

Greed hides out in a cabin in the woods. We get thoughts AGAIN, this time just him wondering what he can do now.

Lust and Gluttony show up to menace him. They say his only options are to be imprisoned again or be destroyed, because Dante is pissed at him for rebelling.

Roa still slices off Al's chains.

Greed is surprised to see Roa and Dolcetto willing to sacrifice themselves to help him escape. This is where Roa mentions he was fused with a dog and gives his line about loyalty. We don't see them die, just a smash to black.

Al escapes with Greed. Greed tells Martel to stay put until sunrise, and leave if he doesn't come back. This is where we get the scene of Martel trying to escape.

Dante confirms her house is where Greed was born. So she's been sitting here for a while.

Looks like Dante had to split.

I love Dante's theme music. It's so subtly creepy.

Greed looks sick even before Dante activates the circle. Mere proximity to the remains weakens them.

The sealing circle is on the ceiling, which blindsides Greed. Always look up when you’re entering a dungeon! Greed realizes Dante's jumped to Lyra.

The red stones disintegrate when Greed vomits them up. Seems wasteful.

Ah, the circle sigil is Izumi's tattoo. So I guess we can presume she got it from Dante.

Greed smashes Ed's automail pretty bad, and the hand breaks when Ed tries to punch the shield. Ed notes that Winry is awesome because he can still move his arm after that.

Ed figures out how to break Greed's shield, explicitly noting that he can't create something from nothing, so the shield must come from somewhere.

Ed has a breakdown when he realizes he's killed someone.

Greed's body melts into red liquid. We cut to Archer, who notices that the skull has spontaneously disintegrated. Oh, so I guess that actually does answer a question I had: the remains seem linked to the homunculi's life, so they can't just destroy them.

Ed makes two graves. One for Greed?

Ed warns Izumi the military might be after her, and tells her to go into hiding.

Conclusion

On a large scale, these episodes are similar in events, but they're incredibly different in details. Most notably, I much prefer how OG handles the military side of things. It's far more subtle, and raises more questions of what Ed signed on for instead of just pitting him against them. Brotherhood is too sudden: the military is good, now suddenly it's evil, and the only difference is that this might cause problems for Ed. OG's coverage focuses on personal culpability, the ease with which the military can corrupt, the lengths to which the characters will go. Ed has to come to terms with killing people; Mustang must come to terms with the possibility he is starting another massacre. These are hard questions that challenge the characters. In Brotherhood, it's just "You thought Greed was the boss fight, but psyche, this other dude is even scarier!" That's impressive if what's engaging you is who can beat whom, but that's not what engages me about stories.

We even end with a preview of our respective villains, though OG is, as usual, subtler. We know there is some connection between Dante (or at least her house) and the homunculi, and Greed notices that something very weird is going on with Lyra. The pieces are starting to come together.

Even the fights are better in OG, in my opinion. Brotherhood is much too manic and features too many superhuman acrobatics. An even fight is also just so much more interesting than Bradly effortlessly pwning someone.

And I think this is important: Ed gets to defeat the villain. This is something that exasperated me as Brotherhood continued: Ed becomes more and more of a spectator in his own narrative, despite being the only hero I was really interested in. OG keeps Ed at the center of the narrative and allows him crucial victories, and I think that makes OG a tighter narrative overall.

On representation: In Brotherhood, Martel dies stupidly and pointlessly. In OG, she is the sole survivor of an otherwise all-male group, and gets to live for another arc.

Also… now that we've gotten to our first homunculi death, I think it'd be a good time to bring up the theme of irony. Everyone says the homunculi meet ironic fates in Brotherhood. They do not. They just don't, okay? Irony means a situation is different than you expected. "They are the thing they're named after" is the exact opposite of that. You'd have to build up something where they claim to be above their own sin, so it's ironic that they end up succumbing to them or something… but that's not really what happens. They're just either killed by their sin, or killed by someone who embodies their sin better. When you don't actually engage with the sin theme at all and just use them as motifs because you think they're cool, that is not deep meaningful symbolism. "It's just cool" is a fine reason to do or enjoy something, but that doesn't automatically make it have substance. Step back a little, guys, please.

OG is not much better, granted, but I do think it's a lot more meaningful when the homunculi actually do come from alchemists' sins. I always got the impression Dante used the sin theme as a commentary on how or why they were made. Lust was the guy's girlfriend; Sloth was put together poorly (or perhaps it's a jab at Hoenheim, for not coming back to save her?); Pride was an experiment to show how awesome she was; and we know she made Greed, so perhaps that was also a purposeful experiment, perhaps just to make a full set? It's not as blatant because it doesn't matter as much because OG isn't as interested in cool things for the sake of it, but there are ways you can engage with it.

With that in mind, though, I think you can make a case that the homunculi's fates in OG actually are ironic, or at least poetic in a more meaningful way. Let's begin with:

Greed is wasted.

We don't know why Dante made Greed, but we know she did make him. She kept him imprisoned because she didn't want to kill him the first time, but now she cuts her losses and disposes of him. Now, an important component of greed to me is hoarding, the inability to give things up. Greed could have still been useful; certainly, Dante invested all those red stones in him that are now gone. He seemed to be hoping that that would work in his favor and get Dante to spare him, but Dante didn't care. He is killed by a lack of greed. Even narratively, he is wasted: his only purpose is to die to teach Ed, and us, how homunculi can be killed.

[deveharrington]

[8 new theories] + Response to anon: On the way David uses his words, his masks, and his social intuition (or lack thereof).

📬

Anonymous: 

I wanted to say thanks for the interesting read and also wow, it’s really amazing how different our perception can be. I never got the ’laid-back’ vibe from DD. Or rather, I get that he tries to project it, but always thought it‘s a mask and in reality he’s just as insecure and high-strung as GA, only hides it better. And I never believed he doesn’t care for his image. I think it hurts him badly that it’s forever tainted. Remember his words that he doesn’t expect his kids to be proud of him?

Hi anon, thank you so much for this message. I need conflicting perspectives like these brought to my attention, otherwise, as you can see, its very easy for me to get into a thinking groove.

I still stand by my claims, but I am willing to change them anytime in light of new info. Opposing opinions like this help connect the pieces in the end and put everything in perspective. It is invaluable to me, so thank you :)

Your ask brings up a lot of great points, so many that I put my response under a cut due to the length. But, before the cut:

Here is a table of contents to summarize, and if anyone is interested in these topics: 

The “short” version of my response to your ask.

The way David uses his words

David places more value on words than actions, and thinks the two are interchangeable. 

David and the excuse, “why bother?”?

David and using excess and indulgence to lose himself. 

David lacks the intuition to read others. He cannot see people for what they are, and maybe he doesn’t want to. (Could be related to him always wearing a mask). 

David and Gillian’s insecurities as both a compatibility AND incompatibility between them. 

On Gillovny (yep, I can somehow relate everything to Gillovny): David and Gillian both have an insatiable greed for this relationship, but they cannot act out of their own fear and insecurities. 

My current theory on why Gillovny is blocked right now (nothing to do with Monique).

*** And to Monique (Hi!), please deliver this message to David: 

(HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Oh David, your refusal to grow up essentially puts you in the Majora’s Mask universe. Haven’t you noticed that you’re constantly repeating the same mistakes over and over and over....? It doesn’t help that you seem to have a mask and excuse for EVERYTHING. I’m sorry about your terrible fate. But you’ve brought it upon yourself.)

(1) 💣 The “short” version of my response to your ask:

I agree with you that the laid-backness is a guise. And I could understand him using a guise if he were performing any progressive action in his career to warrant a guise, but he is not. Maybe the difference between us here is what we’re seeing beneath the guise, but I also believe that his guise has changed, even if its just a subtle change.

I said in my first thesis he has a drive to excel, is competitive, and wants to be seen. I still believe these things. But now, in his current phase, the guise isn’t even laid-back, its “I don’t give a f*ck”. To me, this is a red flag. 

** Its like he knows his career is nothing but he doesn’t want anyone else to tell him about it (his ego makes him want to be the source of all knowledge). So he’s just in “f*ck you” mode at any kind of input coming his way. 

** ACTUALLY maybe this is why it seems like he is ignoring so many issues in his life right now? It might be connected to his natural drive to succeed not being satisfied by his “career”. 

The biggest problematic piece of evidence, for me is reports of him being rude to fans in person, outright ignoring them/not engaging with them online, denying them what they’ve paid for, etc. Why bite the hand that feeds you, while at the same time announcing all the projects you have lined up for the future? It is an aggressive way to treat fans, but David gets by with using the “innocent exploring artist” MASK.

Another piece of evidence: I still see the situation as him doing nothing but I am looking to be proven wrong in the very near future. I haven't listened to his recent podcast about his future projects. I just can’t stand him nowadays, lmfao. 

Also, I created all the ideas of this response before the sofaology nonsense came out lmao! If it turns out that this is the “secret project” he’s been hyping then... LMAO!

For now, my conclusion of the situation is that David is applying some “all or nothing” thinking to his situation, and its throwing his decision making out of control. Like he’s looking at the ends only, not the means. He keeps having projects shut down, but can’t learn that he needs to start somewhere and build his skills and reputation, not just cry out advertisements for himself with no guarantee of fulfilling his many promises. 

I want to agree with you that he (still) cares about his image but... if he did, then what the hell kind of messages is he trying to send right now? And, could it be that he really is just NOT self aware AT ALL? That he might lack the intuition to read others, so he has developed a weird idea of how to interact socially. I say this because he expresses himself so weirdly. Also, maybe he assumes others wear a mask because he wears so many masks himself. So, he doesn’t place value on the way he comes across, only on the words he says?

I mean, and sorry, but let’s illustrate it with his disgusting “relationship”: what the fuck kind of messages is he sending to his kids? to his wife? About love, companionship, partnership, and family (example: “sorry, family, I don’t have time for you because I only have time for - I won’t say it.)? 

BUT it could be that he doesn’t mean to send these kinds of messages? I don’t want to think that he would try to put that image out there on purpose. 

So, what if he really is not aware of himself?? Like, is he THAT selfish that he only thinks about himself and NEVER others? Never even the way they see him? LMao?? Probably not, it might just boil down to a lack of social intuition (hence the “conquering” attitude with women)? That doesn’t make total sense but it does for me?? for now, I guess? I don’t know, lmao. 

(2) 💣 [THEORY 45] The way David uses his words.

I”ll just say this before going forward in hopes that it will show where my perspective is coming from. And this is just what I see:

When david uses words to express himself he mixes his honest sentiments with one or a combo of the following:

- Self-deprecating humour - to give an illusion of humility

- Edginess - to give an illusion of honesty, or some noble quest of “fighting the system” and to get you on his side. 

- Sensationalism/shock value - to get your attention and maybe distract you from the fact that what he is actually saying is either a) completely unfair to opposing views b) not founded upon evidence, but personal bias or c) just complete nothingness. 

- Overly convoluted/deliberately unknowable references - to a) again, distract you from the fact that what he’s saying is complete nothingness, or b) maybe to demonstrate his literary “prowess” and at the same time prevent you from researching the source of his statements.

- Imposing himself/dominating the conversation/making everything about him - a) to fool you into thinking that what he’s saying is correct and/or b) to make himself seem more interesting

*** I think he uses all these tactics because he is really scared that people will get bored of him...

*** BECAUSE he constantly needs people’s attention on him!!!!! He can’t risk people.... NOT paying attention to him!!!!!!

(And to my anon who once sent me some info talking about how David needed one of his girlfriends to constantly remind him that she loved him...thank you! and I didn’t forget about you! I’ll answer your ask... one day!!)

So, here is David blowing his own mind with his incomprehensible strings of alphabet letters because he is both a player AND easily played: 

You’re right, its all an illusion, a mask. But to what end? I think both David and Gillian are just like that, they constantly want the position of power. Humility is out of the question, but this contributes to their insecurity because humility is a socially valued trait. Maybe they are just not comfortable fully expressing who they are. I see this more for David than Gillian. You said, “David hides it better”, so absolutely this is the case, but I’m just asking, why does he feel the need to hide? 

But I can at least respect Gillian because i’ve never seen her really try to project “humble and relatable”. Actually, part of the reason why I love her so much is because she seems open about her insecurities. 

David plays his fans with the “innocent guy” mask and people fall for it. The players and the played just attract each other, I guess.

(3) 💣 [THEORY 46] David places more value on words than actions, and thinks the two are interchangeable. 

To your point about David and Gillian both being equally insecure and using a guise, absolutely. The only thing that makes me hesitate to end the conversation there is the massive difference in their careers. (Will elaborate later). 

For now, I will focus on a theory on how David is rationalizing his guise. You mentioned what he said, that “his kids would not be proud”, but, David, does this mean that you should do nothing to try to make your kids proud? 

Or, he might see his  reputation as “forever tainted”, but, David, does this mean that you should do nothing to try to improve your reputation?

I swear there is a quote of his (which I can’t find anymore, maybe I just made it up? lmao) where he said something along the lines of, “the problems men have are problems they’ve had since the beginning of time”. 

Now, David, come on. Is he saying that we should not even bother to correct ourselves with our actions? We should not try to improve, progress, or contribute to society through innovation? Imagine if women said, “women have always had the position of inequality, so we should not even bother to fight?”. 

To me, these statements of his are just red flags: examples of “all or nothing” thinking. 

Please consider it with what I said about the way David uses his words. 

My theory is that he feels that that as long as he can admit the truth of the situation, then this somehow excuses his actions. Like, his words are so powerful they can be used in the place of corrective action. 

And when he “admits a truth”, he sways the tide with his words to get people on his side. He uses self deprecation to convince you he is self aware. He uses edginess to convince you he is a badass. He uses humour to just make you happy and agreeable. He dominates the conversation to make you feel that he was the one with all the answers/arguments, or perhaps recreate a teacher/student dynamic.

I think he just sees too much power in words, and not just words, but ONLY HIS words. And of course this is not helped by his identity being tied to his education, and also not helped by the fact that he has been able to get his way through excuses. 

So, he just manipulates things to allow him to do whatever he wants in the future. Actually, there is a problem in this in that it can then be hard for people to know what exactly he wants (he has fooled them with his words) and therefore they cannot help him get exactly what he wants. Maybe that is why he is not progressing? Because he is trying to do everything on his own? David, you need to listen to others because you can’t even see yourself. LMFAO. 

This leads to the next two theories:

(4) 💣 [THEORY 47] David and the excuse, “why bother?”. 

It seems like his bread and butter. I’m sorry but I see him as carrying around a lot of judgments that maybe he feels are useful for directing his efforts and constructing his image, but in reality are just limiting him. 

And I think goes hand in hand with:

(5) 💣 [THEORY 48] David and using excess and indulgence to lose himself. 

This is just my perspective. I see that, with David, If something ends up working for him, he will exploit it to the ends of the earth. 

For him, it is not about progress but lateral movement. More and then less, give and then take.

AND he is able to detach himself from his feelings (example: lack of passion) because he is so good at creating arguments and agreeing with himself.

So, to relate to our discussion, I think me might just be saying, “why bother working any harder if I don’t need to?”. But how much lower is the dude gonna stoop past the Sofology nonsense? Lmfao. 

(6) 💣[THEORY 49] David lacks the intuition to read others. He cannot see people for what they are, and maybe he doesn’t want to. (Could be related to him always wearing a MASK). 

I’ll just repost what I wrote in my response to your ask. I want to elaborate on this, but I have nothing more to go on other than Brad Davidson being a scammer right in front of David’s eyes. 

Onto the copy and paste: 

Could it be that he really is just NOT self aware AT ALL? That he might lack the intuition to read others, so he has developed a weird idea of how to interact socially. I say this because he expresses himself so weirdly. Also, maybe he assumes others wear a mask because he wears so many masks himself. 

So, he doesn’t place value on the way he comes across, only on the words he says?

I mean, and sorry, but let’s illustrate it with his disgusting “relationship”: what the fuck kind of messages is he sending to his kids? to his wife? About love, companionship, partnership, and family (example: “sorry, family, I don’t have time for you because I only have time for - I won’t say it.)? 

BUT it could be that he doesn’t mean to send these kinds of messages? I don’t want to think that he would try to put that image out there on purpose. 

So, what if he really is not aware of himself?? Like, is he THAT selfish that he only thinks about himself and NEVER others? Never even the way they see him? LMao?? Probably not, it might just boil down to a lack of social intuition (hence the “conquering” attitude with women)? That doesn’t make total sense but it does for me?? for now, I guess? I don’t know, lmao. 

(7) 💣 [THEORY 50] David and Gillian’s insecurities as both a compatibility AND incompatibility between them. 

Let’s first discuss the compatibility aspect, and I guess it starts and ends with a similarity. So, they are compatible because they both have the same insecurities about being nothingness. 

To quote Daria, 

[David and Gillian] wear superficiality like a suit of armor, 'cus they’re afraid of looking inside and finding absolutely nothing. 

I think maybe both of them just have that fear. I think it might be because they want so badly to be in a position of power and position of provider. 

They can’t fully accept that they are nothingness and its ok to be nothingness, its ok not have the answer all the time, and its ok have to rely on others when that time comes. 

Notice how they talk about mindfulness/meditation almost to like, demonstrate that they are in sync within themselves but they kind of overlook the fact that no person owes anyone an explanation. They have no need to prove themselves. But it could be that they are just describing their lifestyle, sorry, lmao, I’m just always suspicious lmfao.

So, now let’s discuss the incompatibility. Which I see as the way they respond to their insecurity. 

Gillian = action and progress in the face of fear.

David = the complete opposite, resignation and rationalization in the face of fear (combined with letting himself off the hook with rationalizations)

Literally, Gillovny could be blocked by a situation where Gillian is putting in the effort and David is not. 

Although even I can see that i am very biased towards Gillian because I agree more with acting in the face of fear vs. doing nothing at all. But one is not more correct than the other, it is just my personal preference.

After all, anons keep telling me to resign myself and accept whatever this situation is supposed to be, but that is simply not my way :)

(8) 💣 [THEORY 51] My current theory on why Gillovny is blocked right now:

David and Gillian are the ones blocking Gillovny.

Its funny how similar they are in terms of really deep, personal, and unusual traits. David and Monique are the same on the surface (and apparently he can’t see past the surface), but David and Gillian have like… twin dark souls. 

I think with both David and Gillian there will just always be the internal conflicts they have within themselves. They have an image they want to portray, they want to be seen as strong but also vulnerable. I think they want to teach but still see themselves as learning. 

** They want the position of power but also have an insatiable greed themselves, as if they need someone else to be in power as well to provide for them....!!!!!

(I know Gillian said that she wouldn’t like a relationship where the man is the boss, and I love her for saying that, but all humans, male and female, need their partner to be a provider of something.)

** and they want to give but maybe their own greed AND personal insecurities stop them from involving themselves completely. I will offer this as a potential blockage of the Gillovny relationship. Literally, insatiable greed *fans self* mixed with crippling self doubt *cries and writes a gentle love letter to both David and Gillian that I will never send*. 

AS IN: 

Their greed = insatiable need.

And their insecurity = cannot even act to fulfill each other’s needs. 

SO WHAT IF they have a NEED they can’t satisfy because they are literally paralyzed by fear from their insecurities? 

... They have a NEED and they can’t ACT? ooooooooh bby!!!!!!!!!!

*** I could actually see them as being so short sighted in this relationship, probably from how emotionally exciting it must be, that they cannot even see that all they need to do is... ACT. LMAO. And by act I mean take it to the next level. Enough of the boy/girl sh*t everyone can see that this is something about a MAN/WOMAN. 

Maybe David and Gillian show their true colours when they are separated:

David shows he is a boy with his boy/girl nonsense “relationship”

Gillian shows she is a woman with her man/woman relationship. 

?? I’ll just leave it at that for now. 

Its just... If only they could get it into their hard heads that there is no need to hide... from their own love...

Anyways, thanks so much, anon. let’s talk anytime!