#⪼ 𝕀ℂ. ⪻ | interactions.

[usurperkiing]

    Beams of lights of various colors from cheaply-made, electric " disco balls " spun to further illuminate the dim-lit room. Light bulbs of red and blue and the occasional flash of white light when someone would open the bathroom door made up the rest of the light. Music was loud enough to buzz through the floor, making the vibrations start at his feet all the way up to his chest. These speakers were large and surprisingly thankfully really decent in quality, especially in comparison to the lights and beer choices. Aegon did love being close to the speakers at parties. The possible very likely threat of tinnitus ( as his mother had been and would be so eager to remind him of later ) did nothing to deter him.

The only thing that was deterring him from enjoying himself-- and the very attractive woman he was so interested in dancing with and possibly sneaking off to the bathroom with later-- was his sister. It was as if he could sense when something was wrong with her, it was just whether or not he would care enough to do anything about it. Unfortunately for him, he did often care just enough to weave his way through drunk college kids to find Helaena. After all, it was him who had dragged her here because he didn't want to take her home and then come back. Pure laziness on his part. Now, like clockwork, it was time to suffer the consistent consequences of his actions.

With a sigh that morphed into a mildly frustrated groan, Aegon discovered that his spidey-sense was right.

He found her close to a corner near the kitchen, where the music was still loud but the lights were not nearly as irritating. Patrons seemed to pass the corner and his sister by without much thought, which he was actually rather grateful for. Fingernails scratched at reddening skin, and Aegon knew she wouldn't stop even if she broke skin. Touching Helaena in any capacity wouldn't do anything to help the situation, so he came close enough that she would hear him talk, but not close enough to allow any sort of physical contact.

" Have you considered drinking?" Came his sarcastic voice, but there was a very obvious tone of ' come on, let's go ' to it. A tone he had used all their lives, but more frequently than he would have liked now.

| @wcrriorhearts |

[usurperkiing]

Never would he have thought to one day wish that someone believed in something like The Seven. Never would he have thought to one day wish that the delusion of faith would act as a blanket to wrap around and comfort his daughter. If it were under any other circumstances, it might have been ridiculous enough to be humorous. However, given the circumstances that were at hand, it was just ridiculous enough to be frustrating. Angering, even. He could not feign belief well enough to attempt to convince her of their validity, to convince her of some other— better image of her brother. It was a surprise he had attempted to at all.

His lips pressed into a thin line, feeling a panic rise within himself, but his hand remained gentle on her face. While Jaehaera's fits were unknown to him, his mother's were not. It was a familiar sight to see how she trembled, how the air would not fill her lungs, how words would not form yet gasps and wheezes would tell everything he needed to know. But Aegon had hardly cared or tried to ease the fits of his mother. More often than not, the crack of her palm and the sting in his face that followed such episodes would leave him apathetic towards her.

But this was not his mother. This was a child. This was his child. This was his daughter who had witnessed an atrocity and lost a part of herself in the process. And he did care to try to ease her.

Despite how the reach of her little hands had nearly made him flinch, he allowed her to clutch whatever part of him she needed to. It did not affect how he cradled her face steadily in his hands. "Jaehaera. Jaehaera, child, breathe." His voice just loud and firm enough for her to hear over the sounds of her own sobs. "Breathe." In the barely lit room, it was difficult to see clearly, but it didn't stop him from searching for her eyes.

" Listen to me," he began after waiting for some semblance of regular breathing to begin. Once again, he wiped the tears from her cheeks as he held them. "Jaehaera. Your mother needs you to be strong. Maelor needs you to be strong. I know you must feel as though all of your strength has been stolen from you, but I know there is still some in your heart, tucked away for times like this. They need you to find it now. Do you understand, little dragon?" Aegon was far from inspirational, but he knew no other words that would serve useful. It had come too late, he knew, but the desire to be someone who cared for her, for his children, finally decided to take root. And it alarmed him. Somewhere, in the deeper parts of his mind that he cared not to know, the clawing hands of guilt and shame began to crawl through, and the boiling desire for vengeance could only keep them at bay for so long.

Jaehaera had been eerily calm since her brother had been slaughtered, but panic started to seep into her very bones. When she thought of him, all she saw was his decapitated head on the floor, after he had been struck by the sword. She would have tried to scratch her own eyes out, had her father not covered her hands with his. The King's voice was uncharacteristically soft when he spoke to his daughter, ensuring her that Jaehaerys was taken care of by the Seven, who would make sure that he was not frightened without her. It was meant to be reassuring, but the girl did not believe in the Gods. Neither did her father, she knew that.

"They don't exist. They're just stories", she choked out, tears freely flowing down her cheeks, which was not typical for the usually very stoic child. She wanted to tell her father that she could not stop thinking of what had happened, but the words did not leave her lips, because she did not trust him enough. The man before her did not know her. He had never truly been in her life and even though he tried now, it did not make up for the uncountable times he had not tried at all. And yet - when he touched her face, she leaned into it, starved for affection and comfort in a situation that was so unprecedented in her short life that she did not know how to deal with any of it.

"I don't know what to do, what do I do now?", the little girl wailed, sobs wrecking her body, because she was so overwhelmed that she felt like she could not breath and everything was just too much. Jaehaera had always experienced these episodes of panic, mostly in social situations, but her father had most likely never witnessed one of them. She was gasping for air in between sobs and reached out to dig her little fingers into the fabric of his tunic to hold on to something, because she felt like dying too. And somehow she wished the Stranger would claim her right here and now, so she never would have to live without her twin brother. That burden was too heavy to bear.

[usurperkiing]

     Enough was enough. 

     Enough blood had been spilled. Too much, in fact. Aegon wanted none of this. Indifferent as he was to most of the lords whose lives were taken by order of his grandfather and the distaste he very outwardly would show to his nephew, not once did he want anyone killed in his name. In his foolish, drunken state he had sarcastically celebrated his brother for killing the bastard, that much he would admit. But he didn’t want him dead. He didn’t command Aemond to kill him. And yet, somehow it all led to now, where the blood of his own son was on his hands. 

    The looks on his family’s faces, those who had to watch the brutality, was the only thing he could think about as he mounted Sunfyre. The horror that would forever haunt their eyes. The blood on Jaehaera’s face, on her little hands. Helaena would never be the same, and he couldn’t even begin to describe the multitude of emotions that she had gone through in a short time. His mother was nearly crushed under the weight of her own guilt. If this was what being king meant, he did not want it. He would cast his namesake’s crown into dragon fire if only to rid himself of this... This overwhelming sense of anger and sorrow and panic, all so foreign to him. These were the feelings that, once they even began to rear their ugly heads, he would drown them in wine. There was hardly any time or opportunity to drink even close to such lengths since his coronation. It felt wrong to. 

    Sobriety was a fucking curse. 

    Some time ago, perhaps an hour, he had sent a raven to Dragonstone. Inconspicuous. Nothing but a rendezvous point and a request to come alone meant for Rhaenyra’s eyes only. There was nothing to even indicate who had sent it, which might prove to work against him, but he hadn’t thought about that at the time. He could only hope she would understand. And that she would come alone.

    It wasn’t a far trip on dragonback, yet it felt like it took days to get there, even with the urgency with which the golden dragon flew. The moon was still high in the sky, and he assumed it was close to the hour of the owl. Black, jagged mountains came into view. Sunfyre circled the area thrice before landing in an area that would leave them both able to flee easily should Daemon or Jacaerys join or come in place of his half-sister. There would be no talking, no attempt at a surrender if they did. Only fire, only blood. 

      | starter for @wcrriorhearts​​​

[usurperkiing]

  @liikeclockwork​​ asked: ❛ If you mean to elicit some anger from me, you should know that you’re failing. - cassie      - from house of the dragon season one sentence starters. ( x. )

    Insults had always come naturally to him. Being a prince meant that everyone was beneath him, and many needed to be reminded of their place. As a boy, he hardly cared if the words were clever or poorly costumed as compliments. As he grew, however, he learned that if he were to spew any inappropriate, provocative vocables in the place of snub remarks, it would always grant him the reactions he realized he wanted. That discomfort that reddened the cheeks of all who could hear. A reason for them to look at him with the disdain they already held. And soon enough, they would fly off his tongue as a dragon would fly from the pit.

    “ Now why would I want to anger you, my lady?” The wine truly did make it more difficult to conceal the emotions on his face. It left his eyes void of much, but the way he formed slight smirks and the almost sing-song inflection of his voice made him so painfully obviously disingenuous.  “If I wanted to gain your ire, I would be sure to acquire a private room for us.” He liked to be close. Closer than appropriate. Close enough that, if he so desired, he could reach up to brush his fingers against the skin of her throat. “So that you could unleash whatever... pent up frustrations you may have on me.”

[usurperkiing]

   @liikeclockwork​​ sent a raven:  “if i was your date i would’ve never showed up.” cassie bc shes bullying him            - from cruel sentence starters. ( x. )

    “ Sure about that?” Though his eyes were closed, brows raised up and lips pursed. Cigarette held between the ringed fingers of his right hand that hung at his side, knee bent with a foot resting against the outside brick wall of the bar. Tobacco hardly doing anything to mask the stench of the dumpster a few feet away, but he really couldn’t be fucked to care. He had smoked in worse places. Besides, he needed a moment to soothe his wounded ego, since his ‘ date ’ left within the first five minutes of meeting up. “’Cause you’re out here right now. With me. Lookin’ like that. Not even asking to bum a fag. Pretty romantic, if you ask me.”

[usurperkiing]

  @alicenthightowertargaryen​ sent a raven: ❛ there’s no place i’d rather be than by your side. ❜       - from medieval/fantasy sentence starters ( x. )

    Silence. Befuddled silence filled the room, and silence was truly something Aegon hated. That tenseness in the air that could only make one think of what they were doing or what they had done, or worse, what they were going to do. But what his mother uttered to him led to a short revel in the inability to respond. What sort of trickery was this? Was this a dream? His eyes looked into the goblet in his hand and, upon seeing he hadn’t drank nearly enough for his ears to mistake him yet, wondered if the previous night’s wine had ever left his brain. And then that gaze came back to Alicent, and she seemed... genuine. He had never known her to jest, and it wasn’t likely she was to start now. 

    “ I believe you’ve confused me for one of your other sons, mother.” Was what he finally settled on, his expression taut before bringing the aforementioned cup to his lips and downing its contents rather quickly. Surely that was it. 

[usurperkiing]

   @oficecndfyre​​ sent a raven: ❛ keep your sword up and your back straight. ❜  (Baelon)       - from medieval/fantasy sentence starters. ( x. )

     Aegon had trouble trying to differentiate when he was being advised and when he was being chided. More often than not, they would both come in the same tone ( especially from his mother ), so it was easier to believe that it was the latter, as not to make too big a fool of himself in front of anyone. His elder, half-brother was no different. 

    “ Oh, yes,” began the younger with an amused scoff, hilt of a wooden sword resting lackadaisically in his hand, “I forgot what an expert on swordsmanship you are, brother.” It was worth noting that he didn’t correct his posture, either. Whether it was from laziness or pride would truly be anyone’s guess. “Remind me, again, how many duels you’ve won?”

[usurperkiing]

   @wcrriorhearts​​ sent a raven: ❛ of all the idiots in the realm, i’m trapped with you. ❜ ( from Helaena )        - from medieval/fantasy starters. ( x. )

     “ Comforting to know that our blood is not the only thing we have in common, sweet sister.” His gaze did not meet hers as he spoke, instead it was scanning for the nearest pitcher in sight. Wine to ease the headache caused by too much wine. A joke from the gods when they created wine, he supposed. There was, he noted, a chance to jest about how this was the most she had spoken to him in some time, however, he abstained. If only because he couldn’t actually remember if she had spoken to him recently or not. The last few days were a muddled mess in his memory. 

    Hands grabbed for the gold container and the cup that stood next to it. The sound of liquid pouring was almost a comfort. “Perhaps,” he began, offering the cup to Helaena, which was quite the gentlemanly gesture on his part, “our tastes will start overlapping, as well. If only to tolerate each other.”

[usurperkiing]

    His lips curved into a sneer, allowing a less than graceful chortle. Under the influence of a good arbor gold, vexing his half-sister’s children was a favorite past time of his. They almost always played into his antics, much like his younger brother. And when they didn’t, thinking that ignoring him would make him turn his attentions elsewhere, well... sometimes it worked. But sometimes it just encouraged him. 

    “ What an excellent observation, dear niece. You must be the septa’s favorite pupil.” He claimed, thinking himself rather amusing. “However, I’ll be taking that silver back, as you can’t seem to follow the rules.”

&. 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐥 / 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ❛ here’s a copper for your thoughts. and a silver not to tell them. ❜ @usurperkiing.

𝐓he princess paused, looking to her uncle with a slight incredulous look to her lilac colored eyes. Was he drunk again? He'd have to be. "I see you have been dipping generously into your cups." She remarked with a rather annoyed tone to her. She wasn't in the mood to deal with his drunken antics, or any goading from him or Aemond. Whichever this was...She wasn't in the mood.

[usurperkiing]

  @oddlies​ asked: ❛   This is a vile accusation.   ❜   -Set!         - from house of the dragon season one starters. ( x. )

     The corners of his lips twitched up, just enough for the grin that threatened to take over his features could be noticed by the god. Even when he tried to keep a neutral expression, the hint of amused mischief was still evident. A silver goblet rested perfectly in his hand as he gently swished the liquid around, gaze seemingly transfixed on the way the wine swirled in the cup. “Vile, is it?” His brows raised in a feigned surprise as the rim met his lips, that all too familiar taste returning to his tongue as if it had never left. 

     “ My apologies. Perhaps I should word it better, hmm?” The corners of his lips were now pulled down in a rather dramatic frown. “What was the nature of your brother’s death?”

[usurperkiing]

   @oddlies​​ continued from ( x. )

    What was he expecting? He couldn’t even remember. Whether it was something he wanted or something to occupy his time was lost in the drunken chuckles that spilled from his lips just as the wine spilled from his cup. Had Aegon been any more sober, he might have considered it a waste and to waste even a drop of Dornish strongwine he would deem a criminal offense. Maybe he’d scold himself if he remembered it on the morrow. 

   Glazed violet eyes squinted to focus on the figure before him. But while he knew his eyes might deceive him, there was one thing that he could comprehend even in his sleep: a chance to flaunt his status. “My good sir!” The prince began, only slightly slurred, clapping a hand down on the man’s shoulders. “Don’t you know to whom you’re speaking? I am a prince of the realm! Son of King Viserys Targaryen, the first of his name; king of all the...” His wrist twisted in a vague gesture,” fucking— bastards and the first cunts.” Or however that pointless title was declared. An unnecessary mouthful that meant next to nothing to him.

[usurperkiing]

Eagerly, Aegon's feet led him back to the salon, pleased that his hands had something to do. That he had something to focus on that wasn't how terribly uncomfortable he felt. Books stacked in his hands with little thought, only briefly looking at the spines to see the titles and make sure they weren't histories that he and the rest of his siblings all knew, as they were constantly told in any lesson they were given as children. No, he wanted to give her things that were interesting. Or, rather, things he thought could be interesting.

He settled on five.

Aegon was quicker to return than he had intended to be. Placing the stack he selected on a table within her arms' reach, that feeling of discomfort seemed lesser. Not by much, but enough that he noticed it. A simple nod of his head acknowledged her thanks, and he opened his mouth to speak, to fill in any silence and ask her something meaningless and trivial like what her favorite book was, but her request kept him silent. Violet eyes widened ever so slightly before brows furrowed. "I..." She was offering to spend more time with him. Out of her own volition. And it left him confused, truly, but he supposed that was progress. Progress in the direction of what he had come here to achieve. For it to come reciprocated from her was just an unexpected, yet pleasant, surprise.

" I think that is a lovely idea," he eventually replied, the corner of his lips curving up in a half smile. Though he was talking about lingering in the room, it could have easily been mistaken for the offer of wine, which he did swiftly go to retrieve. There was a silent vow he made to himself that he would not drink enough to be truly impaired or belligerent, but just enough to ease him. To make him easier for her to get along with. The goblet was filled and he returned to her bedside, now sitting a bit stiffly at the end of the feathered mattress.

Another beat of silence passed between them before he finally spoke again, "How has it— he been?" His eyes flicked to her stomach to indicate who he was referring to. Nothing about her previous pregnancy was known to him. They were both too young, and he couldn't be bothered with things that didn't interest him. Which was still, mostly, the case. "Better than the first two?"

Helaena could not figure out where her husband's new found kindness came from and wondered whether their mother had forced him to be here. He seemed very much out of his element in her presence and it made her painfully aware of how little he knew about her life, because he only spent time in her vicinity when he wanted a specific thing from Helaena. She still didn't fully trust his niceties, but judging by his demeanour, he was just as insecure as her, which was rather refreshing, given he usually burst from annoying self confidence and just took what he wanted. Then again, it was equally sad to know that even small acts of kindness made him uncomfortable, because they were so unfamiliar to Aegon.

He obeyed her request and briefly disappeared into the sitting room to retrieve the book, which he brought over to her bedside and Helaena took it from him. At his offer, she gave him a genuine smile, because it was uncharacteristically thoughtful. "I would appreciate that very much. Just pick anything, I am not picky." She loved reading as much as Aemond and had spent endless hours with him in the library as children, both curled up in an armchair by the fire, lost in the tales and history texts they were reading that day. Her time was more limited now with twins to raise and duties as princess, but her love for books had never dwindled. Once more Aegon disappeared and returned a short while later with a stack that would undoubtedly get her through the next few days.

"Thank you. It will surely give me something to do now", the young princess remarked and thought of something else to say, so that no awkward silence spread between them again, but Helaena was not the best conversationalist either unfortunately. "Would you...like to stay for a bit? There's wine over there on the table", she suggested, knowing that Aegon was always drinking, one way or another and staying with her would probably appeal more to him, if he could connect it with something he actually enjoyed doing. Not that she necessarily knew what to talk about with him, but he had made an effort, so it was only fair for her to do the same.

[usurperkiing]

" Reason?" A humorless laugh erupted from his chest, restraining himself from rolling his eyes at that anxious look in his mother's eyes. "And what reason is that, hmm? That my father changed his mind? So suddenly, after all these years?" As if not the day prior he had pulled himself out of his incoherent stupor just to support Rhaenyra and her bastard son's claim to a succession that shouldn't have even gone to him in the first place. As if after dinner where Viserys couldn't even look at his disappointment of a first-born son, he would want to put him on the throne. As if Rhaenyra hadn't been the only child of his that he claimed. "I never knew you had such a sense of humor, mother! Where has it been hiding for so long?" His sardonic tone gave away that tinge of frustration, only wishing that he could wake up to realize that this was all nothing but a terrible nightmare from a wine-induced slumber.

&. 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐥 / 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ❛ you’re asking me to commit treason. ❜ @usurperkiing.

𝐈t simply wasn't that simple. Or perhaps, she was too worried to admit that it was that simple. She couldn't understand what Viserys had told her, she had no way of knowing what that could have meant, but it was too late for any of that now. The Seven Kingdoms needed a King. They needed her husband's son, to be King. "No Aegon..." She spoke simply, all her fighting, her guard, down, now actually pleading with him. "I am asking you to see reason."

[usurperkiing]

   Gods be good. What was he supposed to say? What was he supposed to do? Of course she wanted her mother. Of course she would want nothing to do with him, and he couldn’t even bring himself to be upset about that. The affection he was displaying felt unfamiliar even to him, it could have only been foreign to Jaehaera. Still, a wince had to be stifled at her words and his lips formed a tight line. He didn’t try to keep her in his arms, as she very clearly did not want that. However, his hands remained on her shoulders. If only to ground himself, if not her. "I'll take you to your mother when we know it is safe." He attempted reassurance, knowing that was far from his expertise.

For his twenty-some years of life, Aegon might have said that he hadn't a heart with certainty. Or, rather, hadn't a heart that wasn't entirely focused on his own pleasure. Yet, he felt his chest tighten when she begged for her brother.

Again, his hands cupped Jaehaera's face, thumbs wiping away tears and blood that ran down her cheeks as he scrambled for something to tell her. Did he try to lessen the severity, or did he tell her the harsh reality of it? You will never be able to see your brother again was something he'd rather be gutted than say. She was only ten. His gaze followed hers, a nausea creeping into his awareness at the sight of the blood of Jaehaerys on her small hands. The only thing he could think to do was drop one of his hands from her face and cover those stained hands with his own. She didn't need to look at any more blood.

" Jaehaerys won't be alone in the dark," he decided to softly tell her, lightly squeezing her hands. It reassured himself even if it didn't reassure the girl. Saying his son's name felt wrong now. "The Stranger will hold his hand until they meet The Mother, and she will watch over him from now on." The Seven wasn't something that Aegon really believed in, an afterlife even less. He had indulged his mother and her wishes by wearing the symbolic star on his person, but saw it as nothing more than another piece of jewelry to adorn himself with. But the part of him that might have believed in the faith would rather spit in the face of the gods who could be so cruel for the life he was given. For the life of his son they had taken. For the life of his daughter who had to mourn too young the one who she came into the world with. But he hoped that she would find some solace in his words. Even a sliver of ease for her heart and mind. "I'm sorry, Jaehaera."

Jaehaera would have snapped her head back from his touch, had she not been pressed so close to the wall that it was physically impossible. Even though the girl was not as opposed to physical contact as her mother, she only liked it from people she trusted and her father was not one of them. In the ten years of her life, he had barely shown any interest in his children and was almost a stranger to her now. He had shown more interest in Maelor when he was born than the twins, but even that had fizzled out with time. Whoever her father was, King, prince, usurper - Jaehaera had stopped caring about him a long time ago. Her brothers had always been eager to catch his attention, to make him proud and notice them, but Jaehaera gave up years prior. As a daughter, her value was next to none anyway, was it not? All she would be good for one day, was to be married. With his heir now dead, Maelor was the second in the line of succession, not Jaehaera.

When her father pulled her into his arms, Jaehaera remained stiff, but she let it happen. She did not have the heart to reject him this day, when everyone had just suffered such a tragic loss. His name on her lips sounded foreign and she could not remember the last time he had called her...anything. In all honesty, she could not even recall the last time he had interacted more with her, than just acknowledging her presence during family dinners or gatherings. That was the kind of relationship she had with the king and Jaehaera was unsure what had moved him to come to her now. Had he been afraid she would be killed, too? Worried for her safety? Heartbroken about what she had to witness in his absence? It was obvious he was shaken by what had transpired, but how long would that last? Until his next drunken stupor, most likely. And he drank more when he was unhappy, so she was sure he would keep his wine closer than his family in the days to come.

"I want my mother", the little girl told him bitterly, freeing herself from his grip, tears staining her pale and still blood splattered cheeks. Jaehaera did not want to acknowledge that it was there, because otherwise she would have tried to scratch her own skin off to get rid of the remnants of her brother. Pressing her back against the wall again, she lifted one hand and wiped her teary eyes almost defiantly, because she didn't like to be weak in front of other people. It was almost against her nature to have spoken to her father, because he was not trusted enough for her to want to do that. "Where is my mother? And Jaehaerys? I want to see my brother." Tears once again spilled down her face and her thin body trembled. She knew of course that her twin was gone, but she wanted to be with him nonetheless. The idea of being in the crypt alone by himself was daunting. She wanted to hold his hand, while the Septas prepared his body for burial, so he would not be scared. "He is afraid of the dark. It is dark where they take him. I always hold his hand in the dark. Who is going to hold his hand now when he sleeps?" Her words were a whisper, as she dropped her gaze to her crimson stained hands, as if she was trying to see her brother's invisible fingers reaching for hers.

[usurperkiing]

Never before had Aegon felt such dread. Not when Aemond had lost his eye, not when he had to marry his sister, not when Meleys threatened to burn them all at the coronation. Never. Not like this. He didn't know it was possible to feel devoid of blood while it felt like it was boiling simultaneously. Whatever residual wine he had drunk from the clearly premature celebrations was not enough to leave him inebriated. He could not yet tell if his sobriety was a good thing or a bad thing. He could tell that his lungs began to burn from how expeditiously he had been running.

The guards had led him to his daughter first. She had quickly been taken to safety. Stashed away in a quiet room far from his mother's solar, a room that had always been a solemn place ever since he could remember, but now? Aegon had every reason to have the whole room demolished, set ablaze by Sunfyre himself, if only to give his family some peace of mind. It was the least he could do.

It was something he could do.

Aegon shook his head, not allowing the guilt that was taking root make this about himself. He had done that enough. It was only then that he realized the hesitation and shaking in his hands, in his arms, in his entire body. What could he possibly do to comfort Jaehaera? His own daughter that he knew next to nothing about. There was a time where he truly thought that the distance he put between himself and the children he sired was better for them. That he was sparing them some turmoil that having such an inept, disappointment of a man father would bring. A drunken fool who brought shame upon the whole of his family name. How fucking heedless he was.

Now Jaehaerys would never know that his father did love him. He would never know that his father did care for him. Aegon would never be able to hold his son close so that he could whisper words that he always wished he had been told by his own father. He couldn't— wouldn't allow the same for Jaehaera. Or Maelor. Or even Helaena. His conscience wouldn't allow it.

That hesitation made it easier for him to gain some semblance of composure before he made his way in carefully, swiftly, though still taking care not to startle the girl any more than she already was. He could only make out her small silhouette in the corner of the hardly moonlit room through blurry eyes. How long had tears been clouding his eyes? "Jaehaera," he called softly, falling to his knees in front of her as to not tower over her so. Trembling hands ever so gently held her face. The child was pulled into his arms, against his chest, and her name fell from his lips over and over, as though saying it now would somehow make up for all that time that he neglected her. As though it would somehow make up for what she had just witnessed. As though it would somehow make up for the loss of her twin. As though it would somehow make up for every mistake he had ever committed.

The room was cold and dark and Jaehaera could not stop shaking. A guard had grabbed the child from her grandmother's chambers and carried her away from the scene of utter horror there, away from her screaming mother and terrified brother. She was glad to be surrounded by silence now, but her heart had not stopped racing and Jaehaera stared blankly ahead, because she did not want to look at the blood splattered across her face and dress. Her twin's blood. Her twin, who was now dead, because two evil men had come to kill him. A son for a son, they had said, but Jaehaera didn't know what that meant. She just knew that they had cut her brother's throat and then left, escaping through the secret passageways, while her mother had wept and Jaehaera had been frozen, trying to comprehend what had just transpired.

Even now she could not grasp it fully, even though the images were etched into her mind forever. Where was her mother? Where had they brought Maelor and her grandmother? There was a loneliness taking root inside of her that was all consuming and almost physically painful, because her other half was GONE. The twins had always been two sides of a coin. Both not entirely up to Targaryen standards, with her brother's deformities and Jaehaera's small size and utter silence, but for each other they had been enough. Jaehaerys had understood her like no other and been her rock when she had been afraid, or anxious. Who was going to hold her hand while she slept at night now? He had always done that. A few years ago the nurse maids had decided that they were old enough to sleep in their own beds, but the twins had just pushed them together and refused to be parted. Now his side of the bed would forever be empty.

The door suddenly opened and Jaehaera panicked. She jumped up from the chair she had been placed on and scuttled into a corner, cowering into it, knees pulled up to her chest. Her lavender eyes were wide in terror, because in the dim light of the room, she could not immediately see who had entered. No one had remembered to light candles for her when they had deposited the little princess here, getting her out of harm's way for now. After a second of fear, she recognized her father, who was approaching her carefully, for once seemingly sober and quiet enough not to startle her further.

plotted starter for @usurperkiing