#⧽ &. you have to play by the fucking rules! → starters. ⧼

[iraprince]

That chart of your GW2 ocs has compelled me so much. what is gw2. how do you make gay plants in it

guild wars 2 is my favorite mmo of all time! it's free to play, tho if u ever do end up paying for the expacs/living world seasons and stuff they all have flat costs, no monthly subscription ever. (this is what i really like about it, bc games w subs stress me out... if something has a sub and i don't play every day i feel like i'm wasting money or something lol vs gw i can fall off the wagon for weeks/months and no harm done)

ANYWAY our gay plants are one of the playable races -- they're kind of gw2's version of elves, loosely, but they're called sylvari and imo they're much cooler. rather than being "born" they just Wake Up as fully formed adults from the pods of a magical tree and gain mmmmost (but not all) of their consciousness/general understanding of the world from a shared dream that contains the memories and life experience of the sylvari who have come before them, and at the beginning of the plot sylvari as a people have only existed for like. ~20 years, which i think is a really, really compelling hook. also i'm being serious and textual abt the gay thing, arguably the most central sylvari npc is a lesbian and her relationship w her ex is plot important, one of the starter missions u can choose as a sylvari centers around helping a gay couple and the dialogue is Really Insistent abt not letting it be interpreted as "wow they're good friends!!" etc etc

there's also an Evil Faction of sylvari called the nightmare court who feel the dream is overly controlling/sanitized and want to "liberate" sylvari by balancing out the experiences contained in the dream w more negative and painful ones instead -- in-game more often than not they're written pretty flatly as cackling puppy-kicking supervillains but i think they're really interesting lol, a huge chunk of my + marina's ocs are either current or ex nightmare courtiers (including merrit and glyndwr!)

okay wait wait wait im getting distracted and infodumping u can learn all this stuff yourself by getting into the game. gotta rein it in. uhhh let me leave u w screencaps of a bunch of our ocs so u can see some character creation options bc they're so cool

also hey furries: fuicking excellent beast race with close to no sexual dimorphism.

(the one on the left in this pic is an m model and on the right is the f model. the main difference between charr gender models, literally, is how fluffy their tails are. charr fucking rule)

[vamph00n]

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆mdni!!⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆

tags: celebhoon!!xmakeupartistreader!! fem reader, morally grey hoon, sunoo cameo. nsfw

wc: 6k

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆ synopsis: in which page one of the terms and conditions of your contract explicitly states that having physical relations with anyone in the workplace will result in an immediate suspension. that being said, you wonder how long it’ll be till you're fired. well maybe you’ll be exempted from that fate. considering it takes two to tango, and the other person in question is sunghoon. by technicality, you two didn’t exactly break the rules…yet.

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆ taglist: @deobitifull @jakeswifez @d-dilemma

smut tags under the cut!!!

smut tags: dubcon, thigh riding, voyeurism, oral (m receiving), cum, spit, etc lmk if i missed anything.

nothing of what i wrote is meant to represent the real world, please consume what you can handle.

enjoy!

you've heard the woes of people who’ve worked at this specific entertainment agency. as to the reason why, you’ve been met with one hell of a contract for starters. in which the first rule of the terms and conditions explicitly states:

there will absolutely be no physical relations between anyone in the company.

you kind of figured it was a no brainer. working in this industry for a while it was an unspoken rule, but at this company? it was serious. anyone who fucked around didn’t stay long enough to truely understand the social repercussions and the forever stain it left on your reputation.

[redacted] entertainment made sure your future employers had the full rundown on your work behavior.

to you? it was doable. the amount of people you’ve seen come and go from this company was astounding. honestly that rule was the only one that got people fired in the first place, but nonetheless you were dead set on keeping this job.

one, because it paid well, and two; sunghoon.

…

“if you really consider it, they didn’t exactly break rule one,” your coworker conversed.

“yeah, they did,” you emphasized. “giving head is physical relations.”

both of you snickered at yourselves.

eating the food you packed for lunch, you play with that idea. so big deal, you can’t fuck said other employee; there are many ways you can have sexual relations with someone that doesn’t breach company policy. you’re sure that if you had made the decision to whore yourself out to whomever you choose, you’d be sneaky about it. as if you had anyone in mind.

well you do, it’s just…you’d rather put your work first.

“so who’s your ‘muse’ for the next hour” your coworker interrupts your thought process.

looking across the table to the bleach blonde boy whom you spent the majority of work and lunch breaks with, you sigh with contempt. if he didn’t have such a knack with a beauty blender, he’d be a model for the agency himself.

“park sunghoon”

the both of you scrunch your faces in displeasure. so damn difficult. sunoo shakes off that icky feeling, which earns him a faint smile from you. working with him is definitely what made this hell hole bearable.

ever since the well performing ad that prick starred in, it’s like his ego skyrocketed by ten fold. gone were the days he was solely booted to being a deodorant model, (in which you and sunoo had joked about having to conceal his dark underarms one day…)

the aversion seemed to go both ways. sunghoon the no-longer-antiperspirant-endorser, also seemed to have the same malcontent. but it was not exclusive to you two, he was just as equally uninterested to all staff.

well, maybe he was a bit mean to you and sunoo, because word got around about the little inside jokes you made.

“as much as i’d love to keep chatting, you have a date with the former ice prince of febreeze for your pits.” the blonde's laugh echoed.

you chuckle off sunoo’s comment, and brace for a painstakingly slow day.

…

in the midst of the many semi-harmless remarks you’ve made about sunghoon, guess you’ve forgotten to mention the fact that he is your favorite face to work on.

he’s stunning.

unzipping your kit, and setting out the products chosen after reviewing the theme of today's photoshoot, he arrives on the dot. the same icy gaze he seems to never take off lands on you for a few brief moments. you don’t know how long he’s been staring, because your eyes met his once you turned his direction. the manager trailing behind him with a clipboard in hand pulls sunghoon’s attention away, and you continue to set up your workstation. mentally taking note of your supplies:

curling iron, brushes, makeup, check.

gone are the days you actually greet your clients, because he just sits in the chair pulling out his phone. it doesn’t matter anymore because per contract rules, someone of his caliber is not to be talked to unless spoken to. maybe it would’ve been better if he stayed an antiperspirant endorser.

prepping his skin, you let the product sit. he looks bored. guess after a while of doing back to back photoshoots he’d be bored. what a luxury, to have other people do things for you at your hand.

there’s always been a clear divide between staff, and models. obviously. people in cosmetics were no strangers to this dynamic, neither were you. it’s maybe why when someone went from being a D-rate model, to being on the cover of multiple magazines; it puts a sour taste in your mouth.

sure, he was always bound to be on the screen advertising and you’d be working behind the camera. but for that brief moment of time when he was unknown, there was common ground between you two. just an unknown makeup artist and an unknown pretty face, joining the same company at the same time. both at the same starting point.

it sucks, because you could’ve known him, you could’ve been better than him.

there was always a tinge of jealousy.

envy, hurt, and abandonment. could you really feel that way because someone you never really knew? no. consulting yourself, and your thoughts at the time, maybe it’s because you felt you needed someone. feeling like you knew sunghoon is what gave you comfort.

it was stupid, and now you’ve diffused into the rest of the backstage staff. you make remarks about famous beautiful people, and they dehumanize you further as they get more starlight.

working the makeup sponge into his face, you watch him glance up a couple of times. a pang in your chest happens accordingly. trying to shut away the little bits of emotion you feel. you convince yourself it’s borderline creepy, how attached you feel to him yet he probably doesn’t even know you.

you go to set his base with powder, then it’s time to do his eyes. it’s been a while since you’ve had any connection to a person that isn’t just platonic. you think perhaps that’s why the fuzzy feelings you have about him bubble up. a reason you give yourself that doesn’t distract you from your mild distaste. it doesn’t help that you’ve also been going through a major dry spell.

the uncomfortable close nature this job fosters, makes it apparent.

the very charming drunk suitors at the bar are no longer, and your tinder had been long deactivated after seeing a family member pop up. there had been no action in your sex life for far too long, and it definitely got to you.

it’s pathetic. you know.

sunghoon’s manager leaves the room, only you and him remaining there. his eyes glance up at the door, then back to you. shit. the little butterflies in the pit of your stomach start flying around, as the little pitter patter of your heart beat increases. trying to break free of this feeling, you disregard the cardinal rule of not speaking unless spoken to.

“i need to do your eyes now.”

he nods, and closes them, putting his ear buds in. a wave of relief crashes onto you as you start to apply the eyeshadow on his lids. your face so close to his, you can hear his shallow breaths and he can hear yours.

“��sorry i’m so close, i can’t see well.” you mutter as you just try to gain composure.

at time like this is when you question if you’ve always been this easy to fluster.

after a long dragged out time spent working on the first eye, you moved to the second. it felt like time stopped, and you lost all ability to do makeup because it was taking you longer than usual. so many times you had to apologize to him for messing up, once you moved to his right eye he had anticipated another apology.

“sorry this is taking so long—“

“you talk too much.” he interrupts you.

reaching out his hand to pull you closer, in which you assume he was helping you get your job done more efficiently.

his eyes still closed, he reaches unintentionally for your hip, and grabs you onto his leg where you sat.

your body stiffens at the feeling, him seemingly okay with it. is he not saying anything to save himself from embarrassment? you don’t know. because now you are close, you can see better. so it did help, and you stay there, just continuing to do his makeup.

you subtlety shift back to see his face entirely, and feel the friction of his knee against your core.

this isn’t fucking happening.

shifting your weight forward again, feeling the sensation of your clothed cunt moving against his thigh you try to get this job done quickly and soon. it has appeared your lack of action has made quite you sensitive.

hoping to hell, and praying to god he doesn’t notice the growing desire bubbling within you, your shaky hand takes the makeup brush. a craft you’ve perfected, and you're finding it hard to keep your thoughts straight as you apply the base layer of his eyeshadow. as you take your time, you hear his shallow breaths turn into grunts of displeasure and impatience.

something that unintentionally turns you on.

holding your breath, you sigh. if he had noticed the discomfort brewing in your pants, you’d imagine the shock on his face. you anticipate what he’d do if he found out. something a little too risky to test.

sunghoon shifts in his seat, causing his knee to rub against your throbbing heat yet again. oh, it feels too good. can’t help but wonder how the mess you must’ve made.

in your head you’ve already convinced yourself that he has no clue what he is doing. you feel a little perverted, but it does ease your neglected cunt. you can only assume he has no idea the things he’s doing to you because his eyes are closed and his earbuds are in. you continue to try and do your job with a faulty hand.

or maybe he knows. the thought does cross your mind, how can it not? does this add to how utterly attractive you find him? yes. a lot actually.

then he adjusts himself again, causing his leg to bump against your sensitive heat.

oh.

this action earns a hushed moan from your throat, in which you are quick to cover your mouth. he doesn’t look up, and thank god. you're almost finished with his makeup, and so ready to go home after this.

your pussy twitches. it must be dripping right now, fuck.

drawing back your attention, you just have to clean up the look, add a couple of embellishments and you’re done. you can tell he’s still bored. that stupid feeling all your clients have when you do their makeup. you feel a weird sense of anger, and frustration at him. in your head keeping the villainized persona of him is easier, so you can just let go of this acquaintance you grew an attachment to. it also helps distract your mind from the wetness pooling. you do ponder… would he be so bored if you had mentioned how soaked your panties were?

as you are just about to finish up, you smudge it.

“fuck.” you say, as you look at the mistake.

“what’s wrong?” sunghoon mutters while opening his eyes. pausing ever so slightly, he takes a look at your face. the flushed color of your cheeks apparent. he doesn’t take note, at least he doesn’t make you aware that it is visible to him. instead he complains, obviously, and you instruct him to shut his eyes so you can end whatever hell of a wet dream this is.

and so you can forget how much this is turning you on.

as you correct your mistake, he starts to bounce his leg in a habit of boredom. you jolt and there is no way he’s not noticing this; wondering if he has caught on, or if he truly is as stoic as he seems.

you however, can’t make sense of it. nor is your endorphin filled brain actually paying attention to anything other than your pleasure.

if you were ever to recount this, which you know you won’t, you’d most definitely be an unreliable narrator.

your hips uncontrollably press into his thigh, warmth concentrates on the weak delicate parts of you and silently, you let the feeling of your climax engulf your lower body. writhing, the slight tinge of dizzy euphoria was fleeting, because you can’t believe you fucking got off.

it’s l surprising how good it felt, how your wet walls must’ve convulsed so deliciously around nothing. you can’t believe it was that good. embarrassment clouds your brain when you realize how bad you needed that.

you wonder if he notices your heavy breaths, if he’ll see the rise and fall of your chest. you wonder slightly… what he’d do if he had relized you came just now.

the thought is too hot for you to handle.

interrupting your silence, you hear the metal clank of the door knob and you come to your feet quickly. feeling the blood rush back to your head, you watch sunghoon’s manager walk in.

“i’ve finished.” you mumbled. you don’t know who you’re saying it to, the manager, sunghoon; or if you're simply just stating what you did all over your panties.

the man before you stands from the chair, adjusting his clothes, dusting off his lap. you can’t help but think that he knows, and he’s going to get you fired. he can’t, this job is quite literally your livelihood. he looks back to you, heading out the door, his eyes meeting yours. the brief flicker of his gaze on your reddened cheeks. of course he has the last word in a tone you can’t decipher.

“i can see that.”

…

the fluorescent lights of the store are migraine inducing. walking through the aisles searching for things to restock your hygiene products.

it’s been a couple of days, and the incident is still fresh your mind. you’d at least hope that by now it’d fade into the back of your head, but it just won’t. the loud generic pop playing over the speakers as you shop does nothing to drown your thoughts. and even when you’re home no amount of dissociating helps either.

but what the hell can you do?

on top of that, you’re still confused if sunghoon knew what happened.

there’s no way in hell he didn’t.

and like the world is plotting against you, one slight turn to the right you are greeted with the outdated deodorant ad of him. the bright lights the store had pointed to the display were obnoxious.

if he knew, he would’ve snitched. a pit in your stomach started to grow.

from that moment since you’ve been counting down the days, wondering when you’ll get the dreaded call into work. it’s torture, you can’t stand it. you’ve contemplated, maybe telling someone would lessen the weight. who would you tell? your therapist? sunoo? absolutely not.

moreover, how do you go about telling someone how much you enjoyed that?

your phone dings, an email. you hold the screen to you face, surprised at the contents.

…

being ordered to the company on your day off was something you didn’t expect, and if you were to be summoned to the building it should’ve been a pink slip. it was neither, instead you were being called to cover for someone last minute.

walking through the hallways of the establishment, it was empty. who could’ve been here on a day like this, you wouldn’t know, especially at this hour. the lights were only on in a couple of sections, many of the studio doors being locked. you assumed this job would probably be a quick one, whatever it might be.

2415, the number of the studio.

makeup kit in hand as you opened the door, you look up. the last person you wanted to see on the other side of it, sunghoon.

the door shuts behind your back, there’s no manager in sight, or crew, or anyone else. his eyes meeting yours, you swallow thickly. the dryness of your throat distracts you. is it hot in here?

his eyes meet yours in a trance. the corner of his mouth raises. this isn’t about makeup, or a photoshoot is it?

“you like me.” he says.

“huh?”

do you? you suppose... his expression is smug, irritating even.

he trails on, looking you up and down. you seem like someone who’s down for a good time. well, you’re someone who had a good time… one that very well could cost you your job. sunghoon knows that.

he feels the little pride in his chest rise, knowing he can easily persuade you. to do something fun, something different.

“do you wanna keep your job?”

…

sunghoon has a lot of things, money, noteriety, and looks.

he doesn’t have you.

honestly, who wouldn’t want the pretty little makeup artist who fell apart on his lap? yeah he knew. of course he fucking noticed. in that moment when you had lost yourself so innocently on his leg he couldn’t help but wonder just how touch starved you might’ve been. to get off simply at him shaking his leg? feeling your needy little pussy rub against against him? it was far too hot for him not to enjoy…

then again, he thinks back to why he singles you out of the dozen. he’s always sort of seen you as… competent, hard working, and unexpectedly…he found you quite interesting.

did the fact you were both briefed for your jobs at the same time help? maybe, and maybe if it weren’t for the stupid work policy he’d have fucked you already. while he wasn't exactly opposed to breaking the rules… he knew you were adamant about keeping your job.

did he practically hang the job above your head? yes, cause he could very well report you if he wanted. there’s no fun in that.

…

sunghoon’s hum rings in the empty studio. your nerves are still present. did you hear him correctly?

“i’m sorry are you—-“

he cuts you off and nods. how long would this take you to process? he’s fucking blackmailing you.

you stand there, still wondering what this could even entail. he’s made it clear, that’s not his intention to get you fired yet, but what is? your stomach forms a pit at the idea what he’ll make you do. you figure… maybe this is a late revenge for the many times you’ve made snarky comments about him, and you should’ve just let go of that in the past. you think how he’ll now commend you for your present day behavior towards him still, cause yes you still find the deodorant model jokes funny. now paired with the fact you know, that he knew you got off on his knee, there was nothing redeemable about your situation.

he steps forward,closing the space between the two of you. his hand grabbing at your chin, your pretty little face between his thumb and index finger. he knows youre not one to put your job on the line to fuck a coworker, even if your so utterly desperate.

so he’s not going to, not yet at least.

his hand releases from your small face, and he looks at you in your taut little shirt. he wonders if you know how enticing you look. do you know what you do to him? walking around the building looking like that all day. even if you have said some remarks about him, at least you're talking about him. that just clarifies that you think of him at the very least.

“i don’t want to get either of us fired.” is what he claims, but he will hang the job over your head if you don’t comply.

“but, i think you’re in a position that can’t say no to some fun.”

god, he must know how desperate you were. how touch starved you must’ve been for something real. it makes your head spin at the minor excitement that he just might do something.

he smirks at your compliance. “i want to get you off.”

clearing the table where you’d usually put your makeup kit, he pushes up against the counter kissing you in a ferocious manner. his lips so plump, it sends your brain into a daze.

this is physical relations. this will get you fired.

pushing his chest away from yours, he wipes the corners of his mouth. “we were just getting started. you chicken out or something?” he lets out an amused laugh rumble from his stomach. it’s something that makes you remember just how demanding he actually is.

“are you stupid? this is physical relations park!”

“if this goes any further we’ll both get fired.” the sound of the fold up chair scooting back as he sits down takes you away into thought.

you are most certainly sure that he does not give two shits about you right now, and that in the moment he really is trying to get you fired. why you felt his moral compass was that off center, it’s cause you’ve known him for long enough. that being said, the ways you’ve known him was purely how he treated you.

“relax, you didn’t think i was actually going to fuck you?”

that hurt, hurt like hell. it deflated the ego you were slowly starting to build, admittedly because you knew it would take a lot for sunghoon to actually throw his job away just for this. it did make you wonder why out of all people he chose you, but that was shut down quick when he just admitted he wasn’t gonna do anything.

“i recall that i said i wanted to get you off.” the stupid look on his face did nothing to diminish your want for his lips on your own.

sunghoon can see the curiosity, the sweet little pout on your face makes him all the happier to walk you through this. picking up your makeup bag from the floor, he rummaged through the pockets. makeup, sponges— and oh, what’s this?

as you sit on the table, it’s killing you that he’s not just doing as he said he would. does he get off on this? just the sheer fact that he might be making you break the rules? sunghoon is absolutely the type to. he grabs something from the bag in which you don’t catch in it’s entirety before he parts your legs.

“you can finger yourself right? no need for me to tell you how to do that.” his raspy voice bellows.

you nod, so utterly needy. your fingers slip under the fabric of your bottoms. he drinks in the sight as you ever so carefully rub the little bundle of nerves between your fingers. knowing that if you went any faster, this will be a quick session, so you take your time, just feeling how his eyes follow the clothed movement of your hands.

impatient, he takes them off for you. your bottoms. the clothe slides down your legs onto the floor, and god, you look tight. he slightly raises his shoulders, if you both weren’t in the company building right now he’d take you. alas he has to remind himself to hold back that urge. your glistening pussy in all its glory, just as pretty as sunghoon had imagined. it’s just as wet as he thought it would get.

just the way it tightens around nothing has his clothes dick feel the strain in his pants.

“bet your needy hole wishes it could feel this huh?” he rasps while palming over the very visible bulge.

he sits back in the chair, picking up the item and tossing it on the table beside you.

a curling wand.

“w-what do you want me to do with this?” the slight dread, and anticipation you had at his next few words made you just slightly whimper.

the action earns you a pleasured look on his face, and spreads his legs as if to show to you that this is indeed also getting him off.

“don’t be dumb, i want you to stick it in.”

your jaw slightly hangs open, that? that curling wand? you don’t think you’ve ever experienced something of that size, or girth. is he crazy?

the look of hesitation on your face confirms to him that you're unsure, but with a little encouragement he knows you’ll be a good girl.

“can’t take this huh?” he muttered, “that’s a shame.”

picking up the wand then running his tongue along the cold metal, before waving it back to your face.

“lube it up then babe.” his fanged smile submitting you so easily.

the phallic shape of the hair tool takes you back to when you’d fantasize about sticking other things up there to satisfy your needs. thank god you found out what vibratiors were before you got too desperate. although it would seem you’ve regressed, or simply just didn’t think about that in the moment.

spitting on it, and lathering the slick evenly across the wand you’re fucking terrified to say the least.

tou feel that must make sunghoon feel some sick pleasure derived front that.

angling it against your entrance you can already feel the tip being too girthy, like it’ll split you open.

sunghoon stands from his chair seeing your hesitance, and a wad of spit lands on the wand.

“if y’can’t get this in don’t know how you’ll be able to take me.”

oh he’s bluffing, but wait so he’ll fuck you eventually?

“wait so you’re going to—“

“not yet.” he raises his voice before landing back on the chair with his legs spread. “not in the company building no.”

unzipping and undoing the button on his pants, he folds over the sides so you can just barely see the dick print peaking through. your mouth almost salivates at the sight, and that makes sunghoon all the more eager to see your tiny cunt take that fucking hair curler. adjusting his posture he rolls down the elastic of his briefs to reveal that fucking christ—

he wasn’t lying.

watching you take in the sight of his cock, he slightly strokes it, making you eager for his touch and your own pleasure.

“gonna sit and stare? or you gonna fuck your pussy?”

silenced at his words, you push the tool into your depths, and sunghoon audibly moans as he watches every inch get sucked into you. he can only imagine what it would be like if that was him, and the little jolts of pain you displayed would be felt around his dick if he had just took you right then and there.

the stretch is insane, on one hand you can feel the bruises that will form within you, on the other hand you can feel how it hits the delicious spots of your inner walls. oh and the faces he makes as you take this monstrous size into you, it makes you imagine what his will feel like when he’s in balls deep, and what his face will look like.

the oh so pretty face you loved working on, and how it would contort into the same gorgeous expressions. watching his hands grip at his girth as you adjust to the size of the wand, you draw it out, then slam it back into yourself.

“fuck!”

you exclaim as your hand grips at the handle, starting to rhythmically thrust it in and out of your hole. it excites sunghoon all the more.

“looks like you still know how to please yourself huh?” his chest flattens as his hand moves faster, trying to match the same pace as you. it’s unbelievable how wet you’re getting. with each sloppy movement he can hear your melodic voice echo slightly in the room. each thrust drawing out a louder sound.

your back pressed up against the wall, your other hands goes to toy with your aching clit, causing a wave of sensations through your core. biting back a moan you know that would be too loud, the male across you pumps his dick even faster. it’s long, hard, so veiny and pretty. the reddened head of his tip oozing with precum, and his chest rising and falling.

he isn’t ashamed to show how much this does for him, he’s not the type. although, something about being able to see you clench makes him want to feel it. it makes him curse at himself for not just fucking you instead of acting none the wiser while you got off on his thigh. is this really how your cunt looks when taking cock? well, the substitute of one.

you’re just walking around freely with that? he’s been holding off for that?

his hands started to not feel enough, he needed a part of you to be on him so he could feel the relief of just having you to make it feel better. standing up, his erect member in hand, he holds it close to you.

“spit on it.” he almost begs.

who are you to say no?

a glob of your saliva drips onto his veiny need, and he feels it dribble down. still close to you, now near the sight that was merely a few inches away, he can really see how your hole just sucks in the wand. it’s dangerous how much he wants it.

taking the wand away from your hold, he helps you himself, fucking into you faster.

your body moves up with every shove, and he watches as you hold yourself up. the sight of your tits bouncing up and down, and the expressions he draws out make his dick twitch harder, his free hand stroking like his life depended on it.

“bet you take cock so good,” he hums before taking his free hand convered with precum placing it on the top of your stomach. as he impales your guts with the tool, the harmonious sounds from your mouth grow louder, your jaw hanging agape. he can feel how it bulges in your stomach, how you're slowly falling apart for him.

“sunghoon—“ you moan out feeling the pressure be too much, but it also feels too good to make it stop.

the sounds being elicited from your gooey and viscous slick are pornographic. he doesn’t think he’s seen anything quite as good, quite as real.

“look at how much there is, must feel so good huh?” he asks tauntingly.

“fuck, can’t imagine what it must feel like having your pussy wrapped around my dick like that.”

his dirty, dirty words almost make you wetter, if that’s even possible. still rubbing your clit, another wad of his spit lands there, his nod encouraging you to keep going.

his dick twitches at the sight, wanting to get you off faster so he can see what it must look like when you cum. his grip on the handle of the tool so strong, you can see the veins of his hand. fucking into you deeper and faster, all the sensations feel too much. the way it throbs for him, the way you’ve been feeling your peak build from the start, the never ending pleasure. this time it’s not as fleeting, this time your not fucking yourself against his thigh. this time he’s fucking you.

your cunt clenches so hardly around the tool, a familiar heat bubbling to the surface. this time, just stronger, and harder than anything you think you’ve ever experienced.

“sunghoon— i” your words are cut off as he pushes in you harder, and presses your stomach.

“yeah? let me see how your pretty little hole tightens all for me.” he almost growls hungrily.

you nod aggressively, feeling him so eager to get you off. he really wasn’t lying.

with another plunge into your swelling walls, you feel it. the waves of release engulf your whole core. you can feel it through your stomach, the delicate bundle of nerves, and in your vagina. you can feel the slick coat the tool more as you still try to come down from the high.

trying to slide out the curling wand you quickly urge him not to.

“fuck i’m still cumming.” you breathlessly exclaim, your whole body shaking from pleasure.

as sunghoon watched he bathes in how filthy you’ve made that metal rod, how much of that was only you. taking his neglected dick in hand, he hovers over the mess to quickly get himself off.

“what are you—“

he shuts you up, and pumps harder on his own cock, urging you to take some of that mess and lather it against his ache.

he’s so lewd, so open about it to you. there no shyness in sight, and he so wants to use the means that you can provide. it’s so hot, you can’t fathom how you’d ever be into anything like this. looking up at him, his face is desperate for relief, and you coat his dick with the slick you drenched the curling rod with.

you can feel how hot and heavy it is, the feeling of your supple fingertips on his length makes his body recoil from sensitivity. he wants to cum so fucking bad.

he doesn’t know when was the last time he was this eager to get off, maybe when he was a teenager he felt like this. it just seems you’re too intoxicating for him to handle. the texture of all your juices on his length make it hard for him to not bust so quickly, but he has to.

“shit, feels too good.” his voice rings as you just watch.

his thumb swirls at his sticky tip, and you’ve never wanted to put something in your mouth as much as you did now.

you hover over his cock, and lick your lips.

“hey— what the hell?!” sunghoon asks as you take it in your mouth. he’s immediately distracted from the bliss, and he feeling his fists and body clench at the sensation.

“shit, we’re breaking the rules right now—“

he didn’t think you’d really break.

you cut him off as the pop sound of your mouth makes his brain go fuzzy. “let me take it, i wanna taste you.” your saliva all stringy on his length makes it impossible to say no.

your tongue languidly laps at his dick, and you can barely take all of it in your mouth. the rest of the length being pumped by your hands. feeling how smooth he is, how he tastes, it’s so weird. so good. you want to revel in how great his cock is, massaging his neglected balls.

this earns a thrust into your mouth, and he can’t stand this any longer.

“baby, stay like that.” he moans while pumping the base of his cock into your mouth.

your tongue licks up the slit of his hard length, and swirls the tip. tasting his needy sap on your tastebuds, and watching his hips thrust forward. he’s dancing in the edge, trying to drag out the euphoric feeling.

“you’re so close.” your voice breathes out tiredly, just watching him in awe.

when he does, he’s loud. it’s so attractive, that you don’t mind how the hot white ropes spill onto your shirt. oh he came, a lot. there’s too much, so much.

pure bliss, his face contorts.

as he comes down, you can’t help but know that-

you both are now at a higher chance of losing your jobs.

[asliceofzosan]

i've seen figure skater sanji and hockey player zoro before. idk if its been explored but i'd love to put it out there:

hockey player sanji (specifically goalie bc he desperately wants to avoid being checked) and then pairs skater zoro.

pairs skater zoro's long time partner has been nami. though many people ship them together a Lot, they just know each other super well. Well enough to try dating and both of them realized they don't swing that way. in fact, it makes them a really good team. they fought long and hard to claim top spots in competitions because they portray a chemistry that's separate from the rest. plus zoro can carry nami like she weighs fucking nothing. so their lifts are so much more dynamic. they even have a whole next to impossible combination that they're trying to get the ISU to name after them officially.

sanji plays for the East Blue Straw Hats in the Grand Line Hockey League – a formidable rookie group that took down lots of big names in the preseason. they want to make it all the way to the postseason playoff finals but always seem to fall short. but theyre so determined. they reignited a lot of old sparks that were no longer there for old fans and brought in new and curious fans. sanji is the starter goalie and a damn good one at that. it makes sense bc goalies are often doing splits on the ice just to make a save. he's perfected the technique that utilizes just his legs to make saves that make the crowd go fuckin insane.

we have the usual "i booked the rink to practice before you did" trope but a little more spice. in actuality, sanji loves watching pairs skating competitions. his favorite pair rn is franky and robin (mostly for robin). and he adamantly does not want to admit to anyone that he watches zoro and nami's routines much more frequently. (and if anyone asks, he always says its bc of nami. its never just bc of nami.) and zoro's besties with luffy so he always watches their matches even if he barely understands the rules. and he definitely does not stare at a certain blond starter goalie most of the match thats fucking ridiculous

one day zoro and sanji are invited to do one of those comparison videos between hockey players and figure skaters. both get to laugh at the other even Attempting to do their sport. zoro frankly looks ridiculous in all of sanji's usual goalie get-up. and sanji couldn't land an euler to save his life. the video producer suggests they try a simple pairs skating routine. sanji is like "oh i couldn't do that–hEY WHAT THE FUCK MOSSHEAD PUT ME DOWN" because zoro lifted sanji and had him sat on his shoulder like it was normal.

zoro smirks, "you might be lighter than nami, actually. wanna be my new partner?"

sanji knees him in the stomach before skating away while blushing so hard he could melt the ice beneath him.

[slasherscream]

okay in the tags of ur polyam ghostface cooking post you said driving with them would be worse? and I’d be really interested in hearing ur thoughts abt that 👀

A/N: nonny is referencing this ancient post. because the ask is that old. i am but an easily distracted creature of the night, once again. sorry for the wait nonny!

For starters, you can’t let Stu be the one driving. He does not obey the rules of the road. You’re not even sure he knows the rules of the road. If he does, he’s breaking the rules at a frequency level that implies driving unsafely is a casual hobby for him. Like knitting. 

Billy is a better driver. Not always, just when you’re in the car. He’s not gonna risk your life because he likes to go fast and run red lights when he doesn’t see anyone coming.

He’s such a stickler for following the rules in front of you that he side eyes you when you don't do the same. Yes, ladies and gentleman, and gathered beloveds, Billy Loomis is an awful backseat driver. 

He will comment on nearly everything you do while driving the car. Didn’t turn on your signal before changing lines? He noticed. Going over the speed limit? Noticed. Going under the speed limit? Noticed. Didn’t slow down for that curve in the road? Hmmm… lots of things you’re doing wrong. Maybe you should just let him drive. 

If you want to be passenger seat royalty then congratulations! Here’s your boyfriend! If you enjoy driving you will be running to call shotgun on driving, every-time,. Running to beat your boyfriend to the driver’s side car door. Daily humiliation rituals, truly.

It’s enough that you guys have snapped at one another before and finished the drive home in icy silence. You tried to come around to apologize (even though you were not in the wrong) because you know he’s only worried about your safety. 

Also, you were expecting a mutual apology (Billy always sounds pissy, he does not sound any nicer than usual as he’s correcting your driving habits from the passenger seat.) 

So why on Earth did he have to piss you off by saying: “I accept your apology. Just wish you’d pay more attention to the road, honestly.” You have to kill him. It’s the only option left. 

Stu certainly doesn’t help this hostile road environment because he blasts your eardrums to shit every time he gets the AUX. He will also play annoying music on purpose, because he thinks escalating situations is funny. 

He starts playing break up R&B if you guys start really getting into it. Cue Billy turning around to the backseat: “What is your fucking problem, Stu?!”

(One time Stu turned on “I Should Have Cheated by Keyshia Cole” and Billy reached back and started hitting Stu at full strength. You had to pull over the car. What happened to car safety, Billy? What happened to there should be no distractions in the car, Billy?)

Stu would be in charge of navigation but Billy is such a control freak that he can’t let anyone besides himself do it. When he’s the one driving he puts on the navigation voice that tells you when turns are coming up. It interrupts whatever music you have playing every five seconds. He refuses to let you be his navigator. It’s for the better, because if you give Billy a direction too late for him to obey said direction he has to press his lips together very tightly to keep his outside voice from leaving his body in an inside space. 

It’s enough to want to just take a fucking Uber.

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[ccscocoapuffs]

Mark Hoffman NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) Mark is rather complex when it comes to aftercare. He definitely has to have strong trust in you to let his guard down and show you the softer side to truly care for you. The way he does this though is mostly through pulling you into his chest and gently playing in your hair. It's lowkey a head cannon of mine that Mark likes to fidget (ILL EXPLAIN THIS IN A UPCOMING POST!)

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) Mark loves his hands, I mean after all they do all his work. They allow him to pleasure you, caress you, and his personal favorite finger you. Marks an ass man....need I say more.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) Mark doesn't really like super messy, He prefers to simply cum inside you. He would never admit it but he has a thing for watching it drip outta you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) Mark secretly enjoys when you're a brat. Despite how rough he can be with punishments and how he wants you to follow his rules like a good little pet, he loves when you brat. It excites him for what he knows is about to come.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) Mark definitely has experience, He knows exactly how to make you cum over and over again just with his fingers. Mark is also quick to adapt to what his partner likes, aka he's a quick leaner for each individual he's been with. ( *cough* Strahm *cough*)

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) Mark's favorite is doggy style without a doubt. He loves that he can not only pull your hips into him as fast as he wants but he can pull your hair, slap your ass, reach around and choke you....what more could you ask for.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) Mark keeps it serious. I mean for starters its mark has anyone seen the man so much as smile? He's a serious guy and he likes it that way. Plus sex is kind of his way to get relief from a rough day or from being pissed off from whoever has done it this time. He uses sex as his release both psychical and mental, hence the seriousness.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) Mark takes pride in his appearance, he keeps it trimmed down and presentable. The carpet definitely matches the drapes, Mark has Dark brown pubes that are the same as his hair.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) Mark actually can be kind of romantic at times. Now don't get your hopes up he isn't the rose petals and champagne kind of guy. But he may light a few candles and start things off really slow and sensual. However he's still gonna rip your clothes off you and absolutely rail you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) Mark usually doesn't have the time. He stays super busy with work, both at the police department and with John. When he gets some free time he isn't gonna waste it on masturbating, He has you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) KINKY BITCH. Bdsm, choking, Daddy kink, spanking, and spit, just to name a few. Mark always keeps it interesting that's for sure.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) His office, Mark loves when you come to visit him and he gets to bend you over his desk and take what he wants. Mark also has a soft spot for fucking on his bed, he likes the comfortability of a familiar place and the privacy.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) Mark Likes it when you wear skirts or dresses. He especially loves it if you don't wear panties with them. Nothing turns him on more than the thought that people are looking and he gets to show them you're all his. Whether it be by him keeping his hand on your waist all the time or from the other officers talking about the moans that come from his office when you are visiting him.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) Anything that involves you getting involved with Jigsaw. Mark doesn't want John to take advantage of you and use you as leverage against Mark. His biggest fear is losing you too.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Now hear me out here, I feel like Mark actually likes giving. He loves burying his face into you and moaning against you so you can get off on the vibrations from him being so fucking turned on by you. He eats pussy like a god 100%. However, he prefers receiving. He wants to fuck your fac though, he likes to be in control and use your throat for his gain.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) Mark is always ROUGH. It's his only setting, he loves sensual kissing though. He wants to slowly suck on your collarbones, nip your neck just a little, then flip you around and fuck you into the mattress.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) Mark doesn't really like quickies but sometimes its want you got to do. As mentioned before he loves fucking you on his desk, He loves that spot the most especially for quickies.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Mark doesn't really experiment, he knows what he likes and he likes sticking to it. However he does love risky teasing in public, like slipping his finger into you while you're out for dinner or making you keep him warm while he's talking to another officer in his office.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) Mark can go for about 3-4 rounds depending on the day he's had. If he's had a rough day and he's tired you're looking at a quick fuck. If he's had a stressful day, boy are you gonna be there awhile.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) Mark is on the fence about toys. He for sure uses his handcuffs and he likes use Anal plugs on you (if you let him). Though he doesn't really like dildos or vibrators, you're his, only he gets to control your pleasure.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) EXTREMELY unfair. Mark gets off on teasing you, he wants to get you all worked up till the point you are begging for him to take you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) Mark isn't very loud, he mostly just grunts ands groans. When he cums he tends to be louder and let out a deep moan as he buries his face in your neck.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) He keeps a sexy picture of you clipped to the visor in hi patrol car. It's for when he works late nights, all he has to do is look up and take in how sexy your body is and how he get to go home and have you all to himself.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) Mark is about 6 inches in length, He's very thick though. It's something he prides himself on, how much he stretches you.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) Medium, Mark can be either really chill or really horny. It really just depends what he's feeling.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Mark doesn't fall asleep quicky after sex, he's usually up for at least an hour afterwards. That's if he has time to lay down with you and fall asleep. He wants to pull you close and hold you for a bit before he falls asleep. He would never say it but he wants to make sure you are safe and comfortable, hence why he keeps an eye on you for a bit.

[unclewaynemunson]

Pt3 to the Wingman Wayne AU | AO3 link

Eddie knows he was right as soon as he sees Steve: the guy is wearing Levi jeans and a dark-blue polo shirt, and if it wasn't for his tinted chapstick, he would have the appearance of the single most boring straight jock in the universe. He notices how Steve's brown eyes flash up and down Eddie's whole body before fixing back on his face again.

He snorts. 'Told you I'm nothing like my uncle.'

'Yeah, you definitely weren't lying,' Steve comments dryly, and Eddie can't help but laugh.

'You still wanna get that coffee or do you prefer to run the hell away from the freak now that you still can?' he asks while wiggling his eyebrows.

'Hey, you won't hear me complain about a free coffee,' Steve says, already holding the door to the cafe open for Eddie like a gentleman who is taking some perfectly girly girl out on a date.

They get their coffees and sit down at a table next to the window, and Eddie wonders what the hell he should be talking about with this guy he so painfully clearly has nothing in common with.

'So you're into baseball?' he asks – it's basically the only thing he knows about Steve and it seems like a safe enough conversation starter.

Steve nods. 'Yeah, back in high school I used to play basketball and I was on the swimming team, so I never really got to train my baseball skills much, but I really enjoy watching. It's one of those sports that always has you, like, on the edge of your seat, you know?'

Eddie snorts. 'I do not.'

'Not a sports guy?'

'Nope.'

Eddie picks up his coffee cup and blows into the steam, just to give himself something to do; the silence between them feels awkward.

'So what are you into?' Steve asks.

'Um... I'm in a band. Metal.'

Steve nods, a blank look in his eyes – of course he cares just as little about metal as Eddie cares about sports.

'And I play D&D.'

He expects another blank look, or – best case scenario – a confused What's that? which will at least help him keep the conversation going for another few minutes, but to his utter surprise, he sees Steve's brown eyes light up.

'I know that!' It sounds like Steve is even surprising himself with that, which is oddly cute, somehow. 'My brother's like, obsessed with that shit.'

'Really?'

'Yeah, I mean, he isn't actually my brother – he's, like, my ex-girlfriend's little brother's friend, I used to babysit them all the time.' He suddenly stops, as if he's embarrassed by himself. 'I'm sorry, that probably sounded really weird.'

But Eddie grins at him. I like weird, he almost says, but he realizes just in time how that might sound and stops himself.

'Nah, not really,' he says instead. 'It's not like this is an actual date, so you're allowed to talk about your ex-girlfriend as much as you want.'

'I don't –' A blush starts coloring Steve's cheeks as he closes his mouth, then opens it again. 'That's not why I brought her up,' he finally says.

'So are you bisexual?' Eddie asks, suddenly finding himself curious about Steve's story.

Steve shrugs. 'Yeah, I guess,' he says, like he doesn't care much about it. 'I was surprised how your uncle could tell, actually.'

Eddie leans closer towards him. 'It's the lips,' he stage-whispers conspiratorially.

A frown appears between Steve's eyebrows. 'You know, I never really understood that,' he says. 'Why are girls supposed to wear a whole face full of makeup and do I get weird stares because I like to give my lips a subtle glow? What's that all about? Who even made those rules?'

Eddie feels a huge grin spread across his face. Who would've thought that Steve the baseball guy would be so fucking fascinating?

'I dunno, you tell me,' Eddie answers. He glances at Steve's polo. 'By the looks of it, you know much more about that forced conforming shit than I do.'

'You're really lucky with your uncle, you know,' Steve says. 'I could tell he cares about you a lot. It's pretty amazing how supportive he is.'

Suddenly, Eddie is feeling exposed by the intensity of Steve's brown-eyed stare. He averts his gaze and takes the last sip of his coffee.

'Yeah, I know,' he says, quietly. 'He's pretty awesome. But a terrible matchmaker.' He smiles as he looks into Steve's eyes again.

Steve chuckles. 'Totally. Well, I finished my coffee, so we can get outta here and you can go tell your uncle he should never play wingman for you again. Just make sure to also say hi to him from me. And maybe thank him for landing me that free drink.'

'Actually...' Eddie hesitates. 'You're still totally not my type, don't worry about that, but it's actually nice to talk to another queer person, you know? There's not that many of us around here. So if you want to, I could give you another free coffee?'

There's something adorably shy about Steve's smile. 'Yeah, that – that sounds great.'

Pt4

My apologies to everyone being all excited about Eddie instantly falling in love with Steve the moment he saw him, I gotta make them suffer some more first ;P Also, all your comments and tags are making me ridiculously happy, honestly!! I’m kinda overwhelmed by the response, and yes i am going back to read them multiple times bc that’s how lovely they are <333

Taglist: @phantypurple @love-kurdt @eddiemunsonswife @mackdaddyofheimlichcountyy @swimmingbirdrunningrock @paintsplatteredandimperfect @stevesbipanic @momotonescreaming @yourebuckingkiddingme @th3-r4t-k1ng @messrs-weasley @moonshadows-13 @im-sam-fucking-winchester @xjessicafaithx @yournowheregirl @henderdads @lwhoscribbles @courtjestermunson @steveisabicon @rainydays35  @cassaloopa @skeliiix @thesuninyaface @silversnaffles @jestyzesty @4nemo1egend @ace-of-foxes @harringtonsgother @thegingervulcan @snapshotmaestro @thereindeerlady @jillfriend @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @gamerdano @spectrum-spectre @zerokrox-blog @00biscuit @shadow-bender @mixsethaddams @steve-the-hairrington @episcogoth @caligularib @gaydrieeen @winterbuckwild @bookbinderbitch @daysarestranger @nonbinary-eddie-munson @fangirltofangod @solalasoforth @obsessivlyme @slit-wrist @fxndom-hoe @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @joruni @roastingdragon @lenore1232 @princessstevemunson @cuips-not-cute @munsonsuccubus @justalittlefungi @cherrycolas-things @nitrilexam @thepainisspicy @hopefulslothcollecter @whatisreggieshortfor @doctorqueensanatomy @fandemonium-takes-its-toll @sadcanadianwinter @iamsotiredman @orangeandthefairroadkill @anything-thats-rock-and-roll @b-icetea @freddykicksasses @faery-god @poleaxed-aloe @mamaclownhunter @paperbackribs @blvckwidow @mightbeasleep @butuglypeoplefucktoo @lolawon @angryavocadofrog @iwouldsail @livelaughlexa

[goodnightmemes]

ABIGAIL (2024) SENTENCE STARTERS

❛ Fuck. That’s not part of the plan. ❜

❛ You grab me like that again, I may have to respond. ❜

❛ Y’all might want to hold on to something. It’s about to get real accelerated in this bitch. ❜

❛ You know the rules. No real names, no backstories, and keep the grabass to a minimum. ❜

❛ I’m like a expert at reading people. ❜

❛ Wow. You might be the least perceptive person I’ve ever met. ❜

❛ Crisp $100 bill, you can tell me one true thing about me. ❜

❛ You’ve basically got a fucking neon sign over your head that reads “muscle.” ❜

❛ That’s cheap, considering you come from money. ❜

❛ Don’t ever fuck with me. I will know. ❜

❛ Can you take the blindfold off? It’s really tight. ❜

❛ We’re keeping you here until your father gives us some money. ❜

❛ Do you know who my father is? ❜

❛ Can you promise me you’re not gonna let anybody hurt me? ❜

❛ I pinkie promise you that I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you. ❜

❛ I’m sorry about what’s gonna happen to you. ❜

❛ Oh, my God, you’re gonna be a real pain in my ass, aren’t you? ❜

❛ I don’t scare easy, so when I do, I pay attention. ❜

❛ I like you. You’re scary, though. ❜

❛ What’s going on? What’s going on is that we are fucked. ❜

❛ What if we just, like, you know, like, give her back and say sorry? ❜

❛ If seven million per person isn’t worth the risk, then what is? ❜

❛ Everyone stay alert. Any threat is gonna come from outside, so we set a perimeter and we hold it. ❜

❛ Hey, listen. I don’t trust any of these other fucks. So let’s watch each other’s backs. ❜

❛ His head fell off. ❜

❛ Why do you have a dick on your face? ❜

❛ It looks like a fucking wild animal ripped him apart. ❜

❛ I, for one, would like to revisit the cut-and-run idea. ❜

❛ This whole thing is a trap. ❜

❛ Can you pinkie promise me that you’re not keeping a secret? ❜

❛ We can take ��em. ❜

❛ We’re gonna get through this. ❜

❛ Why’d you do it? Bring us here to kill us. ❜

❛ I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, but you don’t sound very calm right now, Little Miss Paranoid, so forgive the precaution. ❜

❛ Wow. You got a lot going on up there,  but your brain’s not quite putting it together, huh? ❜

❛ You’re not as smart as you think you are. ❜

❛ Fucking put it down. I’d really prefer not to have to fucking shoot you. ❜

❛ We kidnapped a fucking vampire. ❜

❛ Someone has been messing with us ever since we got here. ❜

❛ We got to get out of here. There’s got to be another way. ❜

❛ Okay. What do we know about vampires? ❜

❛ What are we talking about, like Anne Rice or True Blood, you know, Twilight? Very different kind of vampires. ❜

❛ Okay, how do we kill a vampire? ❜

❛ Hey, we got a real fucking situation here. So I don’t give a shit what you think. Either you’re helping us, or you’re dead weight. Which is it? ❜

❛ There’s pool cues in the game room. Go sharpen ’em into stakes. ❜

❛ I’m not betting our lives on your fucking hunch. ❜

❛ All right, let’s go kill us a fuckin’… vampire. ❜

❛ You’re so bloody and so gross. ❜

❛ Oh, if you fucking say, “I told you so.” ❜

❛ Listen, you sit here and bleed, or you trust me. ❜

❛ Vampire on my ass! ❜

❛ I’ll kill you fucking fucks! I’ll rip your fucking heads off and gorge myself on your blood! ❜

❛ I’ve had a few centuries of experience. ❜

❛ Tell us how to get out of here, and we’ll let you go. ❜

❛ Hey, what’s gonna happen to me? Am I gonna turn into a vampire? ❜

❛ We would never have taken you if we knew who your father was. ❜

❛ Haven’t you wondered why I brought you all here? ❜

❛ If this is about revenge, why didn’t you just kill us? Why’d you bring us here? ❜

❛ What can I say? I like playing with my food. ❜

❛ If you touch that door, I will shoot you. ❜

❛ Fuck that shit. I’m not staying down here…with that. ❜

❛ Open the door, and I’ll let you keep all your blood. Oh. Organs, too. ❜

❛ Wait. A deal’s a deal. ❜

❛ Still gullible at your age, you fucking freak? ❜

❛ That’s why I took this job. With that money, I can start over, you know? ❜

❛ God, everybody’s got to be a fucking victim now. ❜

❛ Oh, I’m sorry. Did I hit a fucking nerve? ❜

❛ Fuck this job. ❜

❛ Fucking dream team. ❜

❛ You got any other bright ideas, Nosferatu? ❜

❛ Goddamn it. Why did you all listen to me? This isn’t gonna work. This is so fucking stupid. ❜

❛ You got people out there that you care about? ❜

❛ You and me. You’re my friend. ❜

❛ Lot of painful memories. But it’s never too late to make new ones. ❜

❛ I brought you back here to offer you a deal. ❜

❛ You fucking set me up. ❜

❛ You can die here, or you can help me kill [name]. ❜

❛ Yes, drink, and you’ll be one of us. ❜

❛ Our game ends here. ❜

❛ Well, well, well. Look who came to join the party. ❜

❛ Here’s the thing about being a vampire. It takes a long fucking time to learn how to do all the cool shit. ❜

❛ I came when you needed me. I’m here now. ❜

[watcherintheweyr]

Can they make a post with their opinion on young alicent please? (English is not my first language, I hope I used the pronouns correctly. If not, I apologize)

Hello! I’m sorry this took me so long, I had written out this entire response and somehow tumblr fucking ate it.

So for starters, you didn’t quite get the pronoun use right, but that’s totally fine and I really appreciate you trying! Pronouns and the english language are a bitch to learn. So when someone’s pronouns are ‘they/them’ those pronouns only replace gendered pronouns- (he/his/he’s/she/her/hers/she’s). Non gendered pronouns (you/your/you’re/yours) are entirely fine. So this would’ve been ‘Can you make a post with your opinion on young Alicent?’. If you were then to talk about me, it’d be ‘I asked watcherintheweyr to make a post about their opinion on young Alicent’ or ‘Watcherintheweyr made a post explaining their thoughts on young Alicent because I asked them.’

Don’t feel bad pls- the English language is a total bitch, and genuinely you put more effort into trying to get it right than a lot of native english speakers who I interact with. And I really do appreciate it.

anyways, on to your question!

So while I have a lot of sympathy for young Alicent in a lot of ways- I don’t like her, and I never did. For starters, I absolutely despise that the show isolated Rhaenyra and made Alicent her only friend and companion, which was untrue in the books and also makes no sense for how royalty works. Rhaenyra, as the only princess, would’ve have a sizeable ‘household’ of young ladies around her age. Those girls would’ve been essentially her helpers and her companions- she would’ve been in lessons alongside them, and they would’ve worked together in matters of court, politics, and events. Canonically she had a gaggle of young girls she was very close to- to the point that when (SPOILERS) Rhaenyra is murdered by Aegon, her ‘youngest and gentlest’ lady, Elinda Massey, purportedly gouges out her eyes from the trauma and horror.

Also, I despise that Laena Velaryon’s story and importance in Rhaenyra’s life was sacrificed for Alicent Hightower- including their deeply hinted romantic connection.

Anyways, moving on. Alicent Hightower.

Ultimately, I think that Alicent is a tragic example of what happens when you buy into oppressive regimes- further and enable them because you think you’ll be rewarded for sacrificing others to those regimes, and realize far too late that you won’t. She has 100% bought into the Faith of the Seven and Otto and Westeros’ sexism, and she serves that system in the hope that she’ll be rewarded for it, for playing by the rules and sabotaging the power and autonomy of other women- especially Rhaenyra. And all the seeds and groundwork are THERE from episode one if you pay attention. Alicent is a self-righteous hypocrite and not nearly as intelligent as she thinks she is- and she is also a victim of Otto, Viserys, and the patriarchy. I also think she was never a good friend to Rhaenyra- and that she never really knew Rhaenyra.

(This post is going to be VERY long, so buckle up)

In episode one, we see very quickly that Alicent doesn’t understand Rhaenyra well, if at all. She makes the comment that Rhaenyra is ‘disagreeable’ when she’s worried- and is promptly baffled that Rhaenyra’s worry is not her position or about being ‘overshadowed’ for a son- that Rhaenyra genuinely hopes her father will get the son he’s wanted for her entire life, and that her only true worry is her mother. Emma D’Arcy and Milly Alcock both press that Rhaenyra is fully aware that due to her gender that she isn’t ‘enough’ for her parents or the realm, that she’s seen as lacking or deficient. Alicent doesn’t seem at all aware of this. Furthermore, Alicent’s question is… Odd. At this point in the story, Rhaenyra is only ‘a’ princess. She isn’t the heir- Daemon is. The only ‘overshadowing’ that could occur is Viserys’ already fleeting and inconsistent ‘love’ becoming even less present. And Rhaenyra is already expecting this; but Alicent presses more of Rhaenyra’s ‘position’.

Now bear in mind- in the past 10 years, 14 year old Rhaenyra has had to watch her father insist on and continually risk her mother’s life and health, and she’s had to mourn 5 siblings- some born, others not. So Rhaenyra being ‘disagreeable’ when she’s worried makes sense. But when she doesn’t budge on not wanting to talk about/prioritize her ‘position’, Alicent gets huffy and makes to leave. She then appears to be entirely stunned when Rhaenyra verbatim recites the current passage of history that they are learning from their Septa. This piece of information is given to us to set up and establish Rhaenyra’s clever mind and interest in learning- of the 5 episodes we have of Young!Rhaenyra, she is shown to be actively listening to and learning from her superiors in just about all of them, reading and learning from books in 3 of them, and utilizing courtly intrigue, manners, and speak in 3 of them to shut down opponents or disrespect. And yet Alicent is entirely taken aback by Rhaenyra doing this; which again lends itself to the idea that she doesn’t actually know Rhaenyra very well. In the script, at the end of the episode, it’s also expressed that Alicent doesn’t seem to understand Rhaenyra being stressed/worried about her investiture as heir- in her eyes, Rhaenyra now has everything anyone could want. Meanwhile, Rhaenyra has now been revealed the truth of why Aegon conquered the seven kingdoms- and has now been entrusted with learning to rule and govern the kingdoms, and to nurture and protect the legacy meant to fulfill this prophecy- and she is shown to be very aware of and affected by the weight of this.

Alicent, meanwhile, has become a pawn in her father’s bid for power, and a victim to his ambitions, and to Viserys’ sexism and passivity.

In episode 2, Alicent has been seeing Viserys in secret for six months- and notably, it’s 6 months into their meetings that Viserys expresses that he wishes for her not to tell Rhaenyra, as he doesn’t think she would ‘understand’. We see that she is harming herself and Otto doesn’t appear to care about it in any way more meaningful than why she would do so when she’s the most beautiful girl at court- a thing to be envied and admired. We also in this episode see how fully she has bought into the realm and the Faith’s sexism. When Rhaenyra comes to Alicent about her fears of the plots of the lords to marry her father off again now that his period of mourning is coming to an end, and as such they would be plotting to supplant her. She is struggling, because it’s shown that she is trying to act as heir, to learn and participate- because she WANTS this, wants to be heir, wants to do it and do it well- but Otto undermines and humiliates her, and Viserys simply lets it happen- practically enables it. She expresses her fears of these plots and her frustrations and desire to be the heir, to be more and grasp for more than she would’ve ever been allowed as ‘Viserys’ little girl’.

And Alicent’s response is to dismiss Rhaenyra’s fears- to tell her friend and the named heir to the throne that it ‘isnt their place to question the plots of kings and men’. Because Alicent does not believe women can or should hold genuine power- like she says in episode 9, women are meant to ‘gently guide those who [rule]’. And she does this while she is actively a part of one of those very plots that Rhaenyra fears. Now, bear in mind; I am fully aware that Alicent is a victim to her father’s ambitions, and Viserys’ complicity. It’s not Alicent’s fault what these men do to her. And it’s understandable why Alicent wouldn’t want to tell Rhaenyra, in a lot of ways.

That doesn’t change that both Alicent AND Viserys broke Rhaenyra’s trust and hurt her- and she is shown later to be trying to create distance from them- because they have both shown that Rhaenyra cannot trust them. Viserys because he’s self-serving and blind, and Alicent because her ultimate loyalty and obeisance will always be to her father, not Rhaenyra. And Rhaenyra is keenly aware of this after the reveal, even though it is never made clear to Rhaenyra that Alicent wasn’t seeing Viserys in secret of her own volition. That doesn’t change that for six months, since the *night* of Aemma’s funeral, Alicent was seeing Viserys in secret, whilst dismissing Rhaenyra’s fears of that exact sort of plot to her face. That doesn’t change the fact that Rhaenyra has every right to feel hurt, feel betrayed, and not want anything to do with Alicent- or Viserys, beyond what she cannot avoid.

On a note that’s entirely personal, while I know that Alicent was attempting to share something important to her with Rhaenyra in an attempt to help her feel better, to me, Alicent having Rhaenyra partake of her faith felt… strange. Rhaenyra, who named the dragon she shared a cradle with after a goddess of Old Valyria and who has no idea how to pray in a Sept to the Seven, clearly either is not religious or follows Valyrian faiths- and considering her Valyrian marriage to Daemon, it’s likely the latter. Personally- I would not want a friend of mine to try and have me participate in their religion, and I wouldn’t push them to participate in mine either. For me, that was just uncomfortable; but again that’s a purely personal issue.

In episode 3, we see these traits of Alicent’s repeat, as well as her inability to introspect or consider someone else’s feelings. Immediately in the Godswood she uses her ‘weight’ as queen to disregard Rhaenyra attempting create space and distance between them. And while yes it was on command from the King- the way Alicent does it is almost… Smug. She then attempts to tell Rhaenyra that ‘things need not be this way’- as Rhaenyra, upset, goes to change and ready herself for the hunt, despite the fact that this is the last place she wishes to be. Alicent is upset at the loss of her friend, and likely lonely- but she disregards Rhaenyra’s feelings entirely. This is further compounded by the scene in the carriage.

Despite the fact that she and Alicent are not friends, nor truly even speaking, Rhaenyra, who watched her mother struggle and suffer pregnancies, and lose multiple babes and her life, expresses concern that Alicent is traveling in her condition. In an incredibly clumsy attempt to soothe her concerns, Alicent makes the comment that ‘Aegon came quickly and without fuss.’ Again; i understand that this was a very clumsy attempt to ease Rhaenyra’s worry, however everyone in that carriage sees how poorly the comment lands, and Alicent makes no attempt at apology. ‘Aegon came quickly and without fuss’ is.. very insensitive to say to the girl that lost her mother to the childbed, and especially when you are quite literally sitting in that mother’s place- when you’ve replaced her because her last child killed her and died alongside her. If she had made any attempt at apology (the way Rhaenyra did when she saw a comment she made while expressing her frustrations hurt Alicent in e.4), that would be one thing; but she doesn’t.

Rhaenyra is heir- and canonically the only duty she has balked at is marriage. She is currently desperately holding on to being ‘the heir’ with everything she has- because it is all she has, the only thing that doesn’t make her replaceable with the new family that Viserys is building with Alicent- and as such it’s understandable that she doesn’t wish to go to Aegon’s second Name-day celebration, as she is keenly aware of the thing Viserys is blind to and that Alicent is passive to; the realm considers a 2 year old boy child more valuable and more worthy than the 17 year old princess who has actively been learning to be and acting as heir for three years at this point. Alicent’s uncle, Hobart Hightower, welcomes them by crying out ‘All Hail Aegon the Conqueror-Babe, second of his name!’ and neither Viserys nor Alicent does anything. Hobart is not corrected, nor taken to task, and the crown is rabidly enamored with the two year old child all because his genitalia makes him more ‘valuable’ than Rhaenyra. By calling Aegon ‘second of his name’ Hobart is saying the quiet part out loud- the realm all expects and wants for Aegon to be heir, for Rhaenyra to be set aside. Alicent is the queen- but she doesn’t care enough to correct her uncle, either because she does already think her son should be heir or because she doesn’t think it’s a woman’s place to correct a man.

Later in this same episode, she gives an incredibly half-hearted defense of Rhaenyra when Otto begins to speak literal treason- but she does bend to his will yet again, and goes to Viserys with the intent of pushing Aegon’s claim. She is aware in *episode 3* that her father is conspiring against Rhaenyra’s ascension, and she never says a word of it to Viserys or Rhaenyra, because she is Otto’s creature first, and because she agrees- Rhaenyra is a woman, and thus cannot and should not rule.

Episode 4 and 5 really bring Alicent’s hypocrisy and self-centeredness to a head and set the stage for the cruel abuser that she becomes. She is the story of a victim-turned abuser, in the end.

It starts out more positively, with Alicent and Rhaenyra attempting to rekindle their friendship, and discussing Rhaenyra’s tour. Alicent expresses an almost childish lack of understanding of the truth of Rhaenyra’s courtship tour- calling it romantic, seeing it as something dreamlike. Rhaenyra exposes the cold truth of it- after we had earlier seen that none of the options she’s offered (that we see) are actually suitable. She uses courtly manners and speak to have Lord Dondarrion essentially take himself out of the running, by getting him to speak of his age and simply agreeing with him- and is then presented with a literal child. She is fully aware that every man ‘courting’ her doesn’t love her, doesn’t want HER. They want her valyrian blood. They want their children to be dragonriders. They want proximity to the throne and power. Rhaenyra has to choose a consort; and the consequences if she chooses wrong are disastrous. She could choose a man who turns her into what Viserys did to Alicent and Aemma, she could choose a man who utilizes Westerosi patriarchal views and values and turns her into a puppet queen so that he has the actual power, or she could choose a man who is, ultimately, weak- and thus would not be able to support her claim, would not be able to support or defend her when she ascends. She expresses these frustrations- but when she sees one of her comments hurts Alicent, she immediately holds her hand and squeezes in an attempt at comfort and apology.

Alicent expresses that she has found that she has few friends, lately; and this comment is.. Interesting, in what it says of Alicent. That even at the height of female power in the realm, she cannot inspire loyalty or affection in those around her, that the only prospect she has for a friend is her childhood companion. Rhaenyra expresses a hope to grow closer again as well; but well.

Immediately we shift to the scene in the Godswood where Alicent confronts Rhaenyra with her father’s accusations. She comes into the confrontation immediately condescending and judgemental, looking down on Rhaenyra’s rebellious and adventurous nature, as well as her ‘queer Targaryen customs’, and the ‘crimes’ of which she is accused. Because remember; at this point, Alicent has bought entirely into the way the realm and the Faith views women; women who follow the rules, subservient and obedient, never reaching for more, sacrificing and doing their duty, are good, should be rewarded. Anything else is morally deficient, wrong, lesser. Given this and how she approaches the conversation; it is entirely understandable that Rhaenyra doesn’t trust Alicent, and relies on misdirection and her mother’s memory as well as their former closeness to protect herself, because through this entire conversation, it is obvious that if she knew the truth, Alicent *would not protect Rhaenyra.*

Now remember, Alicent speaks with Viserys in ‘defense’ of Rhaenyra- and she knows FULLY well that Viserys doesn’t believe that nothing happened, that Rhaenyra is restless, chaotic, and willful, and that she would have done as she pleases. (Made worse by Viserys bemoaning that Rhaenyra is ‘just a girl’ when 5 years ago he married Alicent and has had 2 children by her at this point and will have 2 more- plus he has been pushing and pressuring for Rhaenyra to marry for at least 3 of those years.)

Later, when Otto is dismissed, Alicent states what we all know to be true; he got himself into this position, because he kept pushing for Aegon to be made heir, to the point of committing treason and spying on the princess, salivating for a moment where she misbehaves that he can use against her. Here we see Alicent begin to believe the seeds Otto has been planting; that Rhaenyra would kill her siblings to secure her ascension. (Remember, the whole reason of the juxtaposition between the boar and the white stag in episode.3 is to directly contradict this. Rhaenyra attacks and kills the boar only because it harmed her and her knight. Killing the white stag would have helped her- it would have made the lords of Westeros see her as chosen, especially since she caught and killed it the day AFTER Aegon’s name day, and it revealed itself to HER [symbolizing that yes, Rhaenyra is the rightful heir and the RIGHT heir]. Killing it would have given her legitimacy beyond legitimacy and silenced MANY of the tongues that are conspiring against her. However she shows it mercy- despite the fact that its’ death would have served her) Despite having once ‘loved’ Rhaenyra, and ‘known’ her, somehow these lies make sense to Alicent and she believes them. (Furthermore, she somehow is shocked in ep.9 that the reverse is true- that to secure Aegon’s ascension, the easiest and most acceptable route to all the men around her who wield the true power, is to kill Rhaenyra and all of her children).

When later Larys mentions the delivery of a tea to Rhaenyra’s chambers on orders of the king (despite, again, her KNOWING that Viserys doesn’t believe nothing happened) she decides to look further into the matter; even though clearly Viserys wishes it dead and buried, left behind in the dust of her father’s departure of the capitol.

In ep.5, when Alicent discovers that Criston Cole slept with Rhaenyra, it all comes to a head. Despite the fact that Rhaenyra didn’t ‘lie’ (she did not sleep with Daemon), in this moment, Rhaenyra has solidified herself in Alicent’s mind as morally deficient, as less, and it infuriates her. The fact that Rhaenyra has taken charge of ehr body and autonomy in a way that Alicent would never have dared infuriates her; because a part of her had always accepted and even wished for what she assumed would be the order of things. That Rhaenyra would ‘sacrifice and do her duty’ and lay down to suffer the whims and wills of the men around them at Alicent’s side. That they would be united in that suffering. That they would be defanged and declawed the way the Faith extolls women must be, to ‘gently guide’ the men in power alongside them. (Ironic considering how later Alicent utterly fails in ‘guiding’ every man in power around her.)

Alicent has followed every rule and every tradition, does her duty no matter the discomfort, and the fact that Rhaenyra is daring to grasp for more, for power of her own, for happiness and autonomy, and isn’t being punished for it infuriates her. Infuriates her to the point that only Rhaenyra’s trasngression matters. To her, it doesn’t matter that Criston Cole broke his vows and slept with the princess because he valued desire over duty (as explicitly stated by Fabien and by ep.4’s directors)- he is a man. Only Rhaenyra must be punished. It doesn’t matter to her that Rhaenyra has bowed to her father’s will and that the choice of who she will be marry has been taken away from her so that he can use her to fix the political wounds he has caused; from this point forward, nothing Rhaenyra ever does will be enough for Alicent. Supplying heirs to the throne and Driftmark? Not enough- especially since Rhaenyra doesn’t assault her gay husband to do so. Acting as heir and putting forth wise, responsible suggestions in politics and problem-solving in the small council? Absolutely not, especially since in Alicent’s mind Rhaenyra has no business ruling over the men in the Small Council. Ruling from the heir’s seat of Dragonstone in preparation for the throne? Not enough. Offering apology when the poison that Alicent has been feeding her children about Rhaenyra and her children causes a fight between the children where her son is injured after throwing around death threats and claimed a dragon without the King’s leave (which IS established to be necessary in Jaehaerys’ reign) Not enough- she must have Lucerys’ eye as well. From this point on, *nothing Rhaenyra can or will do will ever be enough.*

And the irony is that her own hypocrisy never takes herself into account. She uses a dress to declare war at a wedding; insulting the Velaryons and her stepdaughter, and she faces no consequences for doing so, nothing for the disrespect- but only Rhaenyra ‘never’ faces consequences, right? Criston Cole murders a knight of the kingdoms and strikes the future king-consort to the Kingdoms- and Alicent protects him from every consequence, brings him into her own household as her own sworn knight.

In essence; young Alicent is a victim of the Faith, the Patriarchy and the men around her; but all of the seeds for the abuser that she becomes are there. She’s a hypocrite, blind to anything that doesn’t fit the narrative she wishes for, and to a degree, very narcissistic, and not as clever or as powerful as she thinks she is.

Mind you her being self-serving or self-absorbed isn’t some unforgivable crime; but in juxtaposition to how Rhaenyra expresses concern and care for her at multiple points, it just sits very poorly, for me.

Moving on;

Alicent, when younger is… Deeply interesting, deeply flawed, and incredibly tragic. Her younger self sets the stage for how her story ends; (SPOILERS) with her outliving all her children and grandchildren, all of them dead for her grudges and ambition, with her mad and alone.

She’s also, in some ways, very clever; she’s observant, knowing much of the court gossip, even potentially dangerous secrets in e.1 (speaking of that one Lady’s ‘swollen belly’ aka suspected pregnancy). She’s very duty-oriented, though mostly because she wants to be rewarded for how dutiful she is. She’s subservient to the men around her due to how Otto uses her, and short-sighted. I don’t think she’s a particularly kind individual, but I think she did have the POTENTIAL to be kind. She’s a little boy-obsessed- she was confirmed to have had a crush on Daemon and on Criston, plus how she viewed the courtship tour as ‘romantic’, but she’s also so obsessed with Rhaenyra that it blinds her to the truth both of herself and of Rhaenyra- obsessed with an image of Rhaenyra that isn’t actually the truth. She takes solace in her Faith, it seems, more than anything else, and she struggles to connect to people around her in meaningful ways. She has moments of deep insight- such as how she told Rhaenyra that any effort in hers and Viserys’ relationship would have to come from Rhaenyra, as Viserys, a man, is useless to ‘the language of girls’. She doesn’t like risks (no interest in flying with Rhaenyra) or adrenaline, and likely pursues only more ‘feminine’ pursuits- canonically we know Rhaenyra loves to ride horses and to fly Syrax, to hawk and hunt, loves fashion- even in the book I’d say Rhaenyra is a ‘fashionable’ tomboy in a lot of ways. But we don’t really know.. ANY hobbies of Alicent’s. We don’t know her passions, we don’t know her interests outside of the Faith and the ambitions of her family.

We don’t know her relationships with her children or motherhood- though we know she’s jealous of what a good mother Rhaenyra is.

Honestly it’s a shame. S1 really needed to be 20 eps- 10 with the younger versions of Alicent and Rhaenyra, and 10 with the older. It would’ve let us KNOW the characters more and get far more invested in their fates.

Anyways this… is a novel. But I hope I answered your question alright lmao. I think Alicent as a character is very interesting- but good lord I don’t like her, and yeah I didn’t like her younger version either.

[trollprincess]

Okay, so. “The Apprentice.”

Before we go in, if you’re going to watch this film, keep in mind trigger warnings for marital rape and racial, religious, and homophobic slurs.

Now, I would cut for spoilers, but I feel like at this point we should all know enough about Trump’s past that none of this is a spoiler. It’s a bit like saying “The boat sinks” about “Titanic.” Well, yes, it does, but the devil’s in the details.

Anyway. The movie focuses on a younger Trump’s mentorship under attorney, known scumbag, and gay-but-let’s-pretend-he’s-not Roy Cohn. (Let’s put it this way. If he’d died now instead of ‘86, the “I didn’t know the leopards would eat my face” song would be playing over celebratory TikToks.) Cohn proceeds to mold him into the douchebag we all know and loathe, and ends up getting bitten in the process. (Just as a note, this prompted me to get a Cohn biography so I could beef up on just how awful he was in even more detail than I already know.)

The film itself is very well-made. There are choices in terms of camera usage (making it look more 70s and 80s), storytelling, foreshadowing current events, etc., that are very well done. At the beginning, you almost have a smidge of sympathy for Trump, although it’s a HUGE almost. (It’s clear he was raised by a dick and wants to be like said dick, when maybe he would have been better off if his father croaked when he was little and his mother had all the control over his raising and that of his siblings.) Like, there is a *hint* that he might be redeemable if the right person got their hands on him. Instead, it’s Roy Cohn, and we have the six-foot pile of chinchilla diarrhea we have now.

So here’s the thing. I think anybody who heard Jeremy Strong was cast as Cohn thought, “Now that’s perfect casting.” And it is! He looks like him, he sounds like him, he plays him as manipulative sewer sludge. I will be incredibly surprised if he doesn’t get an Oscar nomination for best supporting actor. Every time he’s on screen, you’re drawn to him. He’s a monster, but a monster you want to keep your eyes on, either to see what he pulls next or to see if he finally gets what he fucking deserves.

But you know what was a delightful surprise? Sebastian Stan as Donald Trump. No, I’m not kidding. I mean, no, Trump is not delightful, but I know a lot of people were like, “Aw, SebStan as Trump? Come on.” The thing is, he’s *good*. Obviously, Trump in 2024 is an absolute cartoon of a human being, but all those tics and vocabulary choices and style choices came over time. The Trump at the beginning of the movie is a sliver of what he is now. You can see him if you squint, but you’re still working on SebStan in a bad wig. By the end of the movie, though? He IS Trump in the late 80s. He moves like him, speaks like him, brags like him. It’s as if the current Trump is him turned up to eleven, and SebStan at the end of the movie is him at about five tilting toward six. The last scene is him speaking to the ghost writer of “Art of the Deal,” and you can see Marla Maples-era Trump *right there.* It’s not a comic impression, it is a very real and respectable performance.

I feel like I should also mention that Maria Bakalova portrays an empathetic Ivana, especially given the mentioned rape scene and the moment when she shows Cohn something approaching real sympathy. I think she may be overshadowed in terms of awards by Strong and Stan, but she does a commendable turn as the first of the three wives Trump bulldozes through as his desires change with the wind.

It’s entirely unsurprising that the Trump campaign wouldn’t want this movie released. I mean, for starters, the marital rape scene is horrific and upsetting. But I think they should also be worried about just how much Trump seems to lift wholesale from other people without attribution - Cohn’s rules for life, Reagan’s campaign slogan - not to mention Cohn repeatedly getting him out of shit that should make any average American enraged. Why in God’s name would you support someone who got out of federal discrimination charges and $160 million in taxes for building a hotel using Cohn’s expertise with blackmail?

Of course, that requires the entire movie to be true, and … well, even the most historically accurate movies have their flaws. The problem here is that the people who worship him aren’t going to believe anything bad about him, and the people who wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire are bound to feel that even if something isn’t true, it *sounds* like something he’d do. So fact-checking “The Apprentice” is like fact-checking Cocomelon. Your toddler doesn’t care as long as you give them the damn iPad. But at least with Cocomelon, if you just give them the iPad and walk away with your hands up in defeat, your toddler is probably not going to threaten to set the house on fire because Cocomelon told them to.

So yes, anyway, an excellent movie. I hope someone else is president when it gets nominated for Academy Awards because Jesus fucking Christ.

[marleyybluu]

Truth or Drink 2

Pedro x fem!reader

WC: 1.4k

omg not her posting another Pedro one after she said she wouldn't for a while... not sorry

Same spots. Same interview but under different circumstances. The makeup artist added the finishing touches to your face. Pedro was in awe of you as usual like a smitten kitten, love was written all over his face. You could feel it, you didn't even have to ask if he was looking at you. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?" He innocently shrugged. You rolled your eyes.

The two of you were invited back for another segment of Truth or Drink but this time it was no movie promotion, though you two had separate projects going on, this was about your blossoming relationship. Since the last interview, you and Pedro had finally confessed your feelings to each other and it'd been a blissful ride ever since.

A whole year of surprise dates, endless compliments and kisses, whenever he touched you it made bumps form on your skin as if every time was the first. You too had never loved anyone the way you loved Pedro, you would do anything for him and you made sure he knew that. The makeup was done and soon it was time to record, you were a bit more nervous for this one because the crew had told you guys these questions would be different.

"You guys ready?"

"As always," Pedro answered. The cameraman counted down and pointed for you two to begin, but neither of you said anything. "Am I doing it first this time?" You asked. "By all means."

You blushed and looked at the camera. "Hello, I am YN YLN and this is my... boyfriend Pedro Pascal-" He uttered a giggle and covered his mouth soon after. You laughed hiding behind your hands, this interview might be more chaotic than the last one.

"What do you guys notice about this interview?"

"We didn't have to write our own questions." You answered. "We have pulled questions from various sources. Instagram, Twitter and even people you two are close to."

Pedro playfully frowned. "Shit."

"Same rules apply. You ask, you either say the truth or drink, and you can go ahead with a starter shot."

Pedro picked the drink this time, pouring his and about to pour yours until you stopped him. "Can I have this one, please? I asked them to get me this one." You politely informed pointing to the bottle in the middle. He shrugged pouring your shot and closing back the bottle before placing it back with the others, just like the last time you raised your glasses with a little nod and, "Salud." Once your drinks were down you asked the first question. "Where did you take me on our first date?"

Easy.

He became giggly all over again. "So, you've always said that you hate restaurants as a first date, too bland, too formal, so I booked out an entire arcade for the both of us and we were in there for hours."

You proudly nodded. "Best date ever."

"Good, I'm glad." He blushed. It was his turn to ask. He cleared his throat. "Do we have any pet names for each other?"

You winked. "You love my pet names. I call you Pedrito, Pookie, baby, love... papi Pascal." And judging by his reaction, that might be his favourite one. "My names for her are in Spanish though. So I'll call her mi amor, mi corazon, bébé... I think I'm missing one."

"Cariño." You added. "Oh yeah, she's my cariño."

You leaned back in your chair reading the next question. "What do you like about me, physically? Oh lord." Pedro rubbed his hands together and laughed menacingly, you hid behind your cards knowing he'll say the obvious answer. "Your boobs."

"Alright, interview over."

"No, no, no... relaaax." He played along. "I mean I do like your boobs, but, your eyes do it for me. They're so big and pretty and wondrous, they allow me to look into such a kind loving soul that puts up with me and my antics."

You pouted. "Aww,"

"Boobs are a close second though." He added. "I love your smile the most. When you smile or laugh your eyes close and it's the cutest fucking thing, your entire face lights up too and I could just squish you." You cooed.

You two continued your string of questions, so far nothing was asked that made you want to drink but you still took shots in between for entertainment and the fact that it's free liquor who was passing that up? The first round of questions, you were informed, were mostly from fans and that this round was from close friends and family so it was definitely about to get risqué. You sighed. "Do you think we have enough sex?"

Pedro beamed. "I think we may have too much for people with such busy schedules."

"Are you guys saying you do it whenever and wherever you can?"

You two nodded. "Have you ever done it at a movie premiere or something?"

He reached for the bottle and poured, both of your attempts at keeping a straight face were slowly failing, until you let out a snort that triggered Pedro's. You clinked glasses before taking the shot. "Do you think we'd last if we got married?" Pedro asked. You scrunched up your face, what a ridiculous question. "Of course. You are the most caring and kind person I've ever met, the way you treat me is insane, I've never had anyone love me the way you do," Your voice broke and your eyes burned, you fanned your face and giggled nervously. "Got me crying on camera and shit."

Pedro reached over grabbing your free hand, soothing you by caressing the back of your hand with his thumb. "You know I love you, mama."

"I know." You pouted. "I love you so much."

"I love you so much more." You rolled your eyes gently hitting his arm with the cards, he always had to get the last 'I love you.' He flashed that cute smile that made you melt 100 times over. "Come here," You didn't take even a second thought before getting up to sit on his lap, you rested your head on top of his while he held you close. "How long did it take you guys to say I love you?" One of the crew asked. "Three months," Pedro chuckled. "Truthfully I wanted to say it sooner."

You nodded. "Me too."

Last question. You had a surprise that came with this one. "Are you excited to be a new dad?"

The question didn't really register just yet. "Of course I am. I can't wait for us to start a family one day, and to have another cute face to wake up to. I mean I think maybe I'd wait until I could take a break and then that way I could spend all my time taking care of... wait."

It hit. "Am I excited to be a new dad? But we don't... you're not..."

Pedro bit his lip. "Are you pregnant?"

You reached into your back pocket and pulled out a folded picture of your first ultrasound. He broke. "YN... you're joking."

"I am not," You leaned in and pointed to the little dot. "That little peanut is ours."

Pedro sat speechless which was a rare occasion for him, he took the picture in his hand really trying to comprehend that he assisted in creating another life, that in just nine short months he'd get the one thing he deeply craved, that he yearned for. His own family.

He smiled as a tear slipped from his eye. You wiped it away kissing his temple. "Wait, so what have you been drinking?"

"Diluted apple juice," You answered, you turned the camera and pointed. "Which fucking sucks by the way so my faces were real."

The crew laughed. Pedro still stared at the photo, you rested your head on top of his. "You didn't answer my question. Truth or drink, are you excited to be a dad?"

"Of course, I'm fucking excited," He looked up at you, you pecked his lips. "Thank you," He whispered. "I love you." You whispered back.

"I love you more," He turned to the crew. "I guess the next time you see us we'll have another drinker in the mix." He joked. "Last time we ended this video as a potential couple and this one we are soon to be parents."

"When we come back we'll be married. I promise you that." He hinted. The cameras cut, the crew applauded and congratulated you two. Pedro grabbed your stuff and held them for you as you walked off-set. It's weird to think one little interview that involved a few shots would lead you to where you are now completely and utterly in love.

yes i made him a dad again. yes i warned yall i do this

if you liked this fic, feel free to like this fic. Comments and reblogs are appreciated. peace and love

tags @skyesthebomb

[kianaisspiraling]

Immortal GIGS Crew Phasmophobia AU

GIGS phasmo AU where they're basically just a group of retired immortals having fun :D

Impulse and Skizz started working for this ghost hunting company, and since they can't die, instead of reading the manual they decided to just fuck around and find out.

In truth, they kinda just showed up and started taking jobs. The company was gonna find these intruders and punish them at first, but when the spectacular results started coming in, the higher-ups hesitantly decided to let it go, since none of their actual employees were brave enough to take the cases Impulse and Skizz did.

Eventually, their results from one investigation were left with a letter requesting payment, since they didn't wanna keep using the cheap starter equipment in the van they "borrowed." So if the company slips an envelope full of cash into their own mailbox every time they receive a report for the mystery workers to take, and sometimes equipment disappears from storage with cash in its place, they simply would look the other way.

Later they drag Grian, Scar, and Gem into their shenanigans and they also fuck around and find out.

To the company, the GIGS Crew is their best team, even if they don't know much about them. They always take their hardest, most fatal jobs, and walk out completely fine.

Little do they know these eldritch entities die repeatedly and they scream like little girls. What is considered an almost certainly fatal job for any regular person, is just a game to the GIGS.

For example, all manuals say to snap pictures of cursed items, and safely return them to HQ to be disposed of in a contained area. GIGS crew though? None of them have the self control to not use those. Every single one of them would pull every tarot card for fun and you know it. Manual says to under no circumstances touch a summoning circle. GIGS does not read the manual.

They even set some rules early on, afterall this is a game to them, and what fun is a game if you can't die? So essentially they declared that if a ghost was to hit you with what would be a killing blow, you have to go into spectral form, in which you detach from your body and hover about like a spectator. Think Dr. Strange. The only thing they're allowed to do in this form is pick stray items up, and if everyone "dies" they have to jump ship and come back again later.

They can be 'revived' by the monkey paw or something too. Thing is, despite the fact that they don't need to, they still say, "I wish for Life," before the 'dead' person returns to their body. If this causes some recently dead guy a block away to suddenly wake up fine, sue them. They're causing miracles over here, be grateful!

Now imagine something happens one day that causes a human mortal that also works for the company in some regard to bare witness to GIGS' unhinged method of investigation. They're playing with cursed objects like toys, purposefully triggering hunts, and—

Unnamed is sitting in the van watching the camera closely when it happens. They've been tasked as a fifth, no wait, sixth member of the legendary GIGS crew for the day, since there's apparently a girl named Gem that subs in for Scar half the time. They're thinking that, sure, this team's been a bit reckless so far, but who are they to judge? These guys are THE professionals, after all. However, this viewpoint quickly gets decimated.

"HahAHA Scar's dead!" Unnamed's head snaps up at Grian's outburst. They, being the normal person they are, respond reasonably, "Wait, agent Scar is dead-?!" A pause followed by a realization, "Why the hell are you laughing-?!"

Grian, who came back into the van for candles since they were going to do an Onryo test before it started hunting, suddenly remembers that humans don't think death is funny. Right. Need to fix that slip up.

"Uhm... out of shock, I think?" Wow, A+ excuse, he mentally berates himself. Think Grian, think! Humans have that thing called grief, right? And isn't the first stage of that denial? Bingo! "I.. I'm sorry, I think I'm just.. in denial?" Grian wants to slap himself. Great idea, horrible execution. Unnamed clearly didn't buy it.

Thankfully, that mess was interrupted, "Hey guys, I found the monkey paw. Should I use it to bring Scar back?" Impulse says over the radio. Skizz and Grian are quick to agree, the latter also using the distraction to rush out of the van and that conversation with the candles.

It takes a moment to click, but Unnamed suddenly realizes, "Wait, are you guys gonna use a cursed item to bring Agent Scar back-?! Look, I know you all are mourning, but that is under all circumstances forbidden!" They take a breath in disbelief, "That could have unforeseen consequences!"

Skizz pipes up, not even trying to be subtle, "Well, duh. The consequences are what makes it fun!" Unnamed is interrupted by Impulse before they can rant about how bad of an idea this is—, "Yeah you say that until you're the one that has to deal with them," he chuckles.

Skizz, in blind yet playful rage, bites the bait, "Fine then! Give me the monkey paw, and I'll wish Scar back to life myself!"

Skizz does this and dies, and they can practically hear him complaining from beyond the grave. Impulse snaps a picture of his corpse as they make fun of the position he's in, his back bent backward. Unnamed is frozen in shock in the van as they listen to Skizz's friends, including a newly revived Scar, laugh at their own friend's demise. Oh god, they're surrounded by psychopaths. These guys take all the hardest jobs, of course they've gone crazy—

Unnamed, after spiraling for an unknown amount of time, looks over to the activity chart to see that there is a hunt going on. This gives them some time to collect their thoughts, only for that little composure to immediately be shattered when as soon as the hunt ends, Grian barks out a laugh, "Oh Scar! He's died AGAIN!", "Oh nooo!" Impulse follows along with a chuckle. Unnamed is on the verge of hyperventilating.

The two remaining GIGS return to the van and ignore Unnamed's impending panic attack. Grian tells Impulse that the hunt started right after the third candle blew out, so he thinks it's an Onryo. "I mean we do already have orbs, but I wasn't getting freezing temps and that ghost just wasn't answering spirit box." Impulse counters.

"Listen, I know I was spirit boxin' it pretty good,"—Unnamed shudders at that. The second-hand cringe they felt listening to Grian's "WHERE ARE YOUUU-?!" was indescribable—"but my gut is really telling me it's an Onryo! Besides, we've had ghosts that just refused to talk before."

"Your gut is usually right," Impulse mutters. "Look, we've got one of two evidence and a successful Onryo test, so I say we gag since Scar and Skizz are dead." Grian says. Impulse still looks unsure, "I just feel like it's too soon. One evidence is hardly enough, and that Onryo test could be a fluke."

They have completely forgotten Unnamed is there at this point, and they don't exactly feel like attracting attention to themself as they wilt like a flower in the corner, pondering their life choices.

Grian relents a bit, "Okay how about this, we ask Scar and Skizz if we should gag or continue investigating, fair?" Impulse nods, "Fair."

Unnamed looks up a little, concerned on how exactly they plan to consult their dead friends. They're beginning to think there's a high likelihood they'll quit tonight, and they're definitely going to need a therapist after all this.

Impulse speaks up over the radio despite them all being in the truck, "Alright guys, come get your clipboards!" Unnamed stares on in something akin to horror as two of the clipboards up on the wall start hovering. Impulse's voice is somehow too loud and too quiet at the same time, "Alright, throw your clipboards on the keyboard if we should continue, and throw them on the floor if we should gag."

Both clipboards are now being repeatedly picked up and tossed on the floor of the van by an invisible force. 'Forces,' they correct themself mentally, as it slowly dawns on them that these ghosts are actually Scar and Skizz, and isn't THAT a mind-twister?

Impulse looks slightly disappointed but smiles good-naturedly anyway, "You guys wanna gag? Alrighty then, check off Onryo and let's go!"

This is the moment that Impulse suddenly remembers Unnamed's existence, looking slightly worried at their lack of input, "You okay?" He turns his head, "Grian don't go yet, Unnamed hasn't given their opinion." Grian grumbles out a 'fine', and Impulse looks back at them, "You wanna gag, or should we contin–" Unnamed interrupts, "Just get me outta here please," they near-whisper.

Impulse looks them over and remembers that humans aren't meant to be that pale and hesitantly asks, "You uh... feeling sick?" He looks over to Grian for help, and Unnamed could swear they heard Grian sassily mumble, "Don't look at me, I dunno how humans work either," but they had to be hearing things, because that just doesn't make sense, surely.

"Impulse, lets just go and pass Unnamed onto someone who actually knows what they're doing," Grian grumbles, clearly frustrated. Impulse still looks concerned (at least he's trying), but concedes since, yeah, they really don't know what they're doing, do they?

As Grian starts the truck, Unnamed notices that Scar and Skizz's bodies are suddenly in the truck. Did– did Grian leave while Impulse looked them over? That had only lasted for a few seconds though, Grian couldn't possibly have dragged them in in that time, could he? It's like they were just teleported in here. Unnamed is really going to need that therapist, and maybe some kind of hallucination medication too...

While staring into space and down at the keyboard in misery, Unnamed distantly hears the sounds of someone cracking their joints and grunting noises to accompany it. They fully snap to attention, however, when they hear the people's voices.

Scar makes a sound of discomfort as he snaps his neck back into place, "Oh void, gonna feel that in the mornin'," he mutters to himself. Skizz on the other hand lets out a whoop at the satisfying crack in his back, before immediately thrusting into bickering with Impulse.

"Dipple-Dop, you killed me!" Skizz exclaims, and Unnamed gets the feeling that they should cover their ears, like a child does when their parents fight. "ME-?! You're the one who used the monkey paw!" Impulse retorts. Skizz, "Well, you shouldn't have given it to me!" Impulse, "But you literally asked me for it!" Skizz, "Well, I wouldn't have if you didn't instigate me!" Impulse, "Oh, come on! You..."

Unnamed tunes them out and focuses on Scar and Grian, all thoughts having left their head out of pure shock, believing this must be some twisted fever dream. It makes sense, they think, they have been tasked with reviewing GIGS' reports for the past month after all.

In truth, the only reason Unnamed is here in the first place is because Skizz didn't read a form before signing it. With their previous check, GIGS received a form that was asking about sending someone to monitor and review their methods and see if they're fit to formally become employees. It was really just an effort to get to know something about these mysterious volunteers, though.

Skizz, however, just skimmed the part gushing about how much the company appreciates their hard work and the benefits of becoming real hires, not actually reading the part about the employee evaluation, assuming they were just going to get the rewards. He signed it and wrote down the GIGS Crew email address he created a minute ago, hence why Unnamed is now here. Yippie.

They tune into Grian and Scar's conversation as they vaguely register Impulse and Skizz's continued, albeit quieter, bickering in the background. Scar is griping about the crick in his neck, "Why do you guys always have to leave a guy in the most uncomfortable positions, huh?" Grian responds blunty with zero hesitation, "Because it's funny," he snorts.

Unnamed tunes them out too as their brain starts to reboot enough to process that they are supposed to be dead. Why are they not dead-?!

Grian notices Unnamed staring in the corner and clears his throat above everyone else's chatter, making a gesture towards them once he has their attention. Unnamed can feel their heart sink straight through the floor, and a metaphorical noose tighten around their neck.

He looks over at Scar and Skizz, "You two really couldn't wait to get back up, could you? Remember, we. have. COMPANY!" Grian punctuates each word in that statement with a clap.

The two sheepishly look over at Unnamed while Impulse looks mildly panicked. Scar and Impulse were cooking up some half-baked excuses, and Skizz is malfunctioning when Grian sighs and relents a bit, "Okay, we're really not being that subtle anyway, are we?"

Scar is spewing a ridiculous explanation in the background, "They uh, shocked us back to life while you weren't looking, yeah!" A whisper from Skizz shuts him up, "I'm no expert, but I don't think that's how that works, buddy." Scar deflates a bit, "But that's all I've got..." Skizz rubs a comforting hand on his back, "I know, dude, at least ya' tried."

Before Unnamed can get enough of a grip on themself and ask what in the hell is happening, the ride ends, simultaneously having taken an eternity and also been way too short.

Grian slips out of the driver seat and ushers them outside quickly, them now standing in front of the company's main building looking lost. "Wait!" Impulse stops Grian from driving off, "You forgot your employee evaluation sheet. It looks oddly blank..." Impulse trails off before snapping out of his stupor, "Sorry! Didn't mean to pry. I'm probably not meant to read that, huh?" He slips the report into Unnamed's hand when they don't take it on their own.

"Oh, and would you mind taking in our report for this job too?" Despite the lack of a response, Impulse slips the report into their hands anyway, "Thanks, pleasure working with you! Sorry for any disturbances we many of caused." Impulse calls out as he steps back into the vehicle, Grian driving away as soon as the door closes, as if driving away will solve all their problems.

Unnamed starts to mindlessly wander inside the building, robotically turning in the report and submitting their evaluation sheet for review, one to the standard job review department and one to HQ. 'It really is a bit blank, huh?' They think passively. They're not really there, still feeling like they're floating in nothingness, but it's the first coherent thought they've had regarding reality in a while, so they'll take anything at this point.

Before they know it, they've found their way into the overnight stay room. Most investigations occur at night, so they have two rooms with sectioned off areas, each area containing a twin bed and a nightstand. It would look uncannily like a hospital if the nightstands were metal instead of wood.

They look up at the clock in the room and distantly note that its 2:17 am. Barely acknowledging that, they ungracefully flop onto the nearest available bed and pass out unceremoniously, not even taking off their shoes. The last thing to cross their mind before drifting off into a dreamless sleep is absolute certainty that this must just be a really strange nightmare induced by lack of proper sleep, and with that, they are at peace.

~

Unnamed hazily blinks their eyes open the next morning to see a silhouette sitting on their bedside, vaguely recognizing them as their friend, Unidentified. They can't focus on that though, only signing in relief now that that disturbing dream was over, writing it off as nerves for the upcoming job with GIGS. They're probably completely normal people, if a bit unorthodox.

This illusion is quickly shattered, though, because as soon as Unnamed is conscious enough to listen, their friend speaks, "So, how was it?" Unidentified stares at them with clear excitement, bouncing up and down a bit where they sat.

Unnamed, still pitifully oblivious, tilts their head in confusion, "How was what?" It's Unidentified's turn to be confused, "What do you mean, 'How was what?' The job with GIGS, obviously!" Unidentified exclaims incredulously.

Unnamed's face slowly morphs into one of unbridled horror as they realize that that wasn't a dream.

The next thing they know, they've sat up, fully awake, getting up and brushing themself off. Unidentified quickly switches from excited to worried, "Unnamed, are you okay?"

Unnamed can barely recall how to string together the sounds they call language to reply, "Yeah, I uh... I just need to go report something to HQ." Before Unidentified can respond, Unnamed has rushed out the door, straightening out their attire so that they look at least somewhat presentable in front of the company's head.

They file a request for an immediate meeting with the higher-ups, stressing the importance of it. They add that it has to do with Team GIGS as an afterthought, hoping it'll peak their curiosity.

And so Unnamed sits there, standing in the lobby with pumping adrenaline as they come to terms with a stark truth:

The GIGS crew is not human.

~•~

Bonuses!

POV GIGS Before:

"Look, Grian, I know you don't wanna leave the van, but this time you have to!" Impulse tries to reason, though he knows he's fighting a losing battle.

Grian refuses to relent, gaze boring into Impulse with several Eyes, "But whyyyy?!"

Impulse lets out an exhausted sigh, he's been at this for a while, "You know why, an inspector is going to be hunting with us this time, and they're human! We have to give them van duty or else they could die in the house. Like actually die."

Grian let's out an indignant whine, his wings puffing out in defiance, "And? There's gonna be five of us, can't we both just be in the van or something?"

"Grian, you and I both know that out of everyone here, except for maybe Gem, you get along with humans the least. You don't even try to be friendly!" Impulse counters. He can see Grian's resolve beginning to falter as he continues, "You don't wanna be stuck in the van with a 'strange mortal' the whole time, do you?" He uses air quotes, trying to speak Grian's language, and it's working.

Grian visibly deflates a little bit, crossing his arms and looking away as he bites out a bitter, "no." He's staring with only two eyes now, so that's progress Impulse thinks.

Skizz finally cuts in, not having wanted to get involved when Grian was still yelling, but will now that he's somewhat calm, "Listen buddy, it's not like you've never left the van before! You do it whenever Gemstone joins us, and sometimes when a bunch of us are dead!" Skizz chuckles a bit, "It's nothin' you haven't done before, G-Sharp."

Grian fully deflates this time, tension releasing from his body as looks at his feet and heaves a sigh of his own, "Fiiiine. The stupid human can have the vaaaan." He pouts, but it's the best they're going to get so they take it.

Impulse finally lets out a breath of relief, glad that he's avoided the possible murder of their inspector. Void, he really feels like a single mom sometimes.

~•~

POV GIGS After:

Grian is most definitely driving faster than the speed limit allows, not that he particularly cares. That went horribly, the human saw Scar and Skizz revive themselves for Void's sake!

In truth, they were never really dead. They really just couldn't bend their death-related rules they set for a day, huh? He has the urge to bury his face in the steering wheel as he drives. "This is why I avoid mortals," he grumbles to himself.

~

When they arrive at their designated "ghost hunting lobby," as they call it, they all devolve into various states of stress.

Grian face-plants into sofa and screams into a throw pillow, Eyes forming and popping around his head like lava. Impulse is pacing around the room like a maniac, pointed tail swishing back and forth in distress. Scar sits on the armchair, fiddling with his cane and pushing a hand through his hair, his eyes practically stapled open, gazing into space. Skizz just kind of stands there, his tail also swishing in anxiety as he dreads the inevitable.

Scar finally shatters the silence, "Now, I don't wanna point fingers, but," he points at Skizz, "kinda your fault, Skizz." There it is, there's what Skizz was dreading.

He tries to defend himself anyways, "Alright listen, I know that most of this is my fault for signing that dumb form, but you can't deny that we all messed up at least a little bit."

Impulse stops pacing at that. Grian doesn't move from his misery on the sofa, not reacting at all.

"I- yeah, Skizz is right. We all kind of screwed up. I think our main problem was how casually we acknowledged death. It's surprisingly easy to forget that humans don't view life as a game..." Impulse rubs the back of his neck, guilty.

Skizz still looks apologetic though, "Yeah, just know I'm really sorry about that. Maybe don't put me on mail duty anymore."

Scar stands up, his skin having taken on a blue blue sheen, his edges a little sharper, and small translucent wings behind him. "It's okay man, I probably would have done the same thing," he picks up a Jellie that's winding in between his legs, "plus we both kinda revived while Unnamed was right there, so you can't take all the blame for that."

"Thanks dude, that means a lot." Skizz slings an arm over Scar's shoulder.

Grian finally sits up, "So what happens now?" All heads turn to him, their stares questioning.

Eyes have never bothered Grian, since he has more of them, so he stands up fully and elaborates, "Well, within the next few days, the company is gonna know we're not human. What exactly do we do now?" A contemplating pause followed by a sad voice, "Do we... have to quit ghost hunting?"

The room goes deathly quiet. They... didn't think about that. Even Skizz and Scar look crestfallen. It's Impulse who pipes up, "No, we don't." he says surprisingly self-assured, all eyes now on him.

Impulse continues on, "I mean, Skizz and I just kinda showed up one day and they couldn't get rid of us, them knowing what we are isn't gonna change that. How exactly would they stop us?" The crew looks a little less depressed at that.

"Plus," Impulse looks hesitant for a moment, "Unnamed's reaction to death reminded me of how fragile human life really is, so even if we're only doing this for fun," he looks to each of them, "it makes me feel like we're protecting them, even if just by taking the lethal jobs."

Skizz perks up at the notion, and Scar breaks out into a grin, waltzing over to Impulse and slinging an arm over his shoulder. Jellie wanders off to go paw at Grian, who's sat back down, still squeezing that throw pillow.

Scar has regained his aura of grandeur, as he joins Impulse in cheering them up, "Yeah, I like that! We're helping by dying where they can't!" He looks very excited at the thought.

It's Skizz's turn to join the building huddle, an arm finding it's way on Impulse's other shoulder. "Oh yeah! Good guy Skizzleman, saving mortals from the horrors of death!" He pumps a fist in the air.

Grian gets up, Jellie trailing behind, and reluctantly joins the hug, arms around Scar and Skizz and his wings around all of them. "I don't care what happens to those humans, but whatever," grian mumbles. Impulse just smiles fondly at him, because despite how he pretends not to, Impulse can see just how much Grian truly cares. He doesn't have to understand mortals to care for them.

The soft moment is interrupted by a ding from Skizz's phone. They untangle their arms as Skizz checks what it is.

He perks up excitedly, "Oh, it's our report's review for the job!" He chuckles a bit, "If one good thing came out of signing that form, it's that we now get almost instant results!"

He clicks on the email, eager to see if they guessed right. Spoiler, they did not.

"What-?!" His face contorts to one of disbelief, "A Mare-?! How?" Grian shoots up at Skizz's outburst, clearly upset.

"What-?! Yeah how-?! That thing wasn't turning off any lights!" He squawks indignantly, a few Eyes floating over Skizz's shoulder to read it himself.

Scar looks wholly unaffected, "Eh, I don't really know how we got Onryo in the first place, I was too busy being dead."

Impulse seems to slowly come to a conclusion, "Well, if you think about it, we weren't really turning the lights on to begin with," his voice picks up a bit, "We were putting so many candles out for the Onryo test, that—"

Skizz finishes, "We stopped turning on the breaker 'cause the candlelight was enough!"

None of them have to turn around to see Grian facepalming, the scream of frustration enough for them to paint that picture themselves, "I hate this game!"

Grian isn't done with his rampage, "But wait, doesn't Mare also need spirit box?" He looks to Impulse for confirmation, and continues once he gets a nod, "But I did spirit box so well though! I had great coverage."

Impulse puts up a hand placatingly, "Yeah, I agree, you did spirit box pretty good, but we were on Nightmare, so spirit box probably just probably wasn't one of the two random evidence."

Grian crosses his arms, "Or maybe it's because someone," he casts a glare at Impulse, though he means nothing malicious by it, "just had to prestige, leaving us with shoddy level 1 equipment." He sighs however, "But you're probably right. We didn't really look that hard for Ghost Writing, did we?"

He wanders off to grumble to himself a little longer, and they all laugh at Grian's pity-party. They end up sitting on sofa together for a while, just chatting about things they couldn't talk about while Unnamed was there.

Impulse is telling a story from Hermitcraft earlier that day, but he stops when Gem comes up in it, paling, "Oh Void..."

Impulse's face unravels into one of dread, a realization forming, "Gem's gonna smack us all upside the head for this." Oh. Oh no. They all shudder in unison. They're screwed.

~•~

Thanks for reading my little self-indulgent AU-idea turned into a fic!

This was originally meant to just be an AU idea, but I blinked and I'd written a whole fic, so yeah.

I think I'll edit this a bit and post it on Ao3 too of that interests anyone.

Feel free to use the idea however you want, just tag me, I wanna see what you do :)

[beemers-hell]

holds out cup

a bit of your thoughts on character designing? your characters are all so distinct and unique, I've been wanting to ask for awhile how you went about your sillies!

You fool. You idiot. You absolute buffoon. You have no idea what you've done. You have no idea what I am about to unleash unto you all.

Hi i am extremely autistic about character design so obligatory [read more] because I am gonna fucking TALK your EAR OFF about this shit, prepare for a fuckass LOOOOOOOOONG post

So the first rule of character design is to fuck around and have fun :)

Anyway onto the real shit:

P1: Foundational Shit

For starters, I'll link you to a post I made like 3 years ago on this topic, just to get some foundational shit out of the way!

Me personally, I have a very rigid structure I stick to whenever I design characters, which is:

I must know what their personality is like

I must know what their fashion tastes are

I must know what their role in the story is (this one only applies if the character is even apart of a bigger narrative in the first place, obviously. I just am strict and don't make new characters unless I have a purpose for them to serve in my stories so it's hard baked into how I operate as a character designer lol)

By having these in mind when I design characters, shit becomes a WHOLE lot easier/more natural for me. This is because:

The personality of a character can usually be reflected in their design, whether it be a bubbly loud energetic guy who's dolled up in bright colors and playful clothing accessories, a commanding bossy stoic guy who's dolled up in subtle and professional clothing pieces, or even subverting this idea by having a character who acts one way but dresses in a way you'd expect from the opposite.

Knowing what kinds of fashion this character would be into in the first place makes it a whole lot easier to get ideas and look for resources on ways you can style them- Knowing the character would be interested in like, for example, scene fashion makes it far easier to look for the type of clothing they'd wear and find pieces that stand out to you so you can start experimenting with what works or what doesn't for that character.

Knowing the role they play can also help a lot when designing them, much like knowing their fashion tastes can. However, where knowing their fashion tastes helps in looking for visual inspiration, knowing their role in a story can help with their design in a thematic sense; If the character is supposed to be some kind of trouble maker rebellious kid, then you're probably going to wanna make them visually fit the bill (or, again, you might want to subvert the idea of what a rebellious little shithead looks like so you go for the opposite of what people imagine!) Ykwim?

Now with that out of the way, let's get some VISUAL EXAMPLES, using my guys obviously lmao

For an example of the personality thing, here's a page I made where I talk about my thought process behind the designs of some of my goons in regards to taking into account their personality (and aesthetic taste):

For an example of the story role thing, here's a page I made where I talk about my thought process behind the designs of Eb and Ben (+Neco and Alli) in regards to the role they play in their story:

I hope this gets the point across!

P2: Additional Stuff to Consider

In addition to the above section, there's also some other things you can utilize to try and make your designs stand out!

One such thing is brainstorming ideas for stand out design elements! Like, something that' makes them stand out from the crowd, or an element of their design that is so specific to them that they just can't be the same character without it. This thing in general is kind of vague by nature so here's some examples using my guys that I think get the point across:

You can also go the extra mile and give them little design details that just add that little extra bit of "oomf" to the character overall. Again, this is kind of vague by nature, but here are some examples I can give with my characters. Some of these doodles are OLD AS HELL so that's why the art style is outdated, but the point still stands!

You can also go the extra mile to try and diversify your designs by doing some structural tests with your characters. What I mean by this is by literally dumbing them down to their most basic attributes, or as I like to call it, "Run the Silhouette & Recognition Test" What I mean by this:

The Silhouette Test: Making a lineup of your characters and blacking them out so they show up as silhouettes, which allows you to check the readability and/or recognizability of your character's design, and if it's unique from your other characters!

Recognition Test: Make a lineup of all of your character's heads and/or bodies, and only draw their facial features/head shape and/or body shape/structure, nothing else. I do this mainly to help myself try to avoid face/body syndrome and I think it works pretty well for me!

Now, for my last extra thing; Remember my point about knowing a character's taste in fashion? This is applies here. Knowing your character's fashion tastes can make designing their main outfit, or any other alternate outfits you make for them, like SUPER fuckin easy. Here's a couple examples with some of my gals:

Raina likes real casual clothes, simple shit like crop tops/tank tops n' jeans, just styled to her liking. She's a simple chick with simple tastes! But there are noticeable touches, like how she has a habit of changing her earrings to match the occasion she's celebrating!

Eb likes grungy clothes, and adds flair to her outfits by dipping into a decora kei inspired style of accessorizing, which compliments her nicely since she loves customizing things to make them her own. She's not fully there with the extravagance of it yet but she's getting there!

Yume likes pastel colors and form fitting clothes, sometimes with loose jackets/robes to keep her cozy, with minimal accessories. She's also simple, but unlike Raina, she doesn't tend to try and go the extra mile with jewelry and/or makeup, not often.

Bank's a baby punk and is still finding her style, but it's clear she likes a lot of leather, spikes, chains, all that kind of shit. Dark colors, with minimal touches of her favorite color (pink lol), and some accessories like earrings, pins, and/or straps are enough to complete a look for her. And of course, any clothing article to obscure her face works for her!

I hope I don't sound fucking nuts I genuinely put way too much time into thinking about all of this stupid bullshit lmao

P3: Actual Examples of Me Working Through the Character Design Process

I figure if I show off examples where I was working on concept shit, that'd help put this into something digestible for y'all lol.

For starters, here's a doodle page I made back in 2021 when I was making small tweaks to a couple of my guys designs, which is why my art style looks old and some characters have their outdated looks lol:

Now, here's a MUCH more recent example of my concept process, where I was figuring out the idea for Namgi's new design (which is still being worked on atm lol):

Here's the concept pages I made when I was figuring out Majin's recent redesign:

And here's some concept pages I made when I I was figuring out the Possessed Form designs for my hosts!

I hope this is all actually helpful and not just like. stupid nothing shit lmao

And like, yanno, you don't HAVE to do/listen to any of this, this is just the kind of shit I've learned over the years that personally helps me with coming up with designs that feel fresh and distinct, at least for my personal tastes! Something I do might just not work for you, the design process is unique for everyone obviously. It's the same thing as your art style, everyone does shit differently lol

This concludes my Autism Ramble!!

[ash-says]

Saviour Complex Fever:

Let's address the saviour Complex today and no I am not talking here only in the romantic sense but also in platonic, familial,etc ways.

Ohh my traumatized girlies you better get your attention piqued up here cause this can be a call out or triggering post.

Speaking in my corporate babe language I am going to adopt both top to bottom and bottom to top approach to make sure you understand the problem. So without circumventing much I am going in for the goal.

1) Top to bottom Approach:

Starting with the OG," I can fix them" attitude.

Calm down babe, you can't. How about first fixing your sleep schedule for the starters?

We usually see this attitude being discussed a lot in the romantic hemisphere but I profoundly believe it plays a pivotal role in other bonds we have with people and tend to bleed into our romantic life so on and so forth.

Example: Take a child who is five years old and the parents are irresponsible. The child learns early on not only to look after itself but also acts as a therapist to his parents if one of them has zero sense of emotional boundaries and tends to trauma dump on the child. The child will look for ways in which he/she can make things easier and happier for the parent. In a way try to fix the parent and take on the role of being an adult.

How does it affect the bonds you create as an adult?

You become the mom friend.

The mama duck of the group who is always making sure everyone is taken care of properly.

You go above and beyond your comfort to help your friends out.

Take responsibility for your immediate surroundings.

Always trying to be the best and act like a saviour.

Last but not the least, people violate your boundaries time and time again but you forgive them and treat them like a child despite them being functioning adults.

So your homework is to assess your friendships, familial relationships, romantic relationships and check whether you are babysitting a adult?

If yes, are you getting paid for it enough?

No, drop the role.

2) Bottom to Top Approach:

Even the saviour dreams of being saved at times.

One of the potent reasons we tend to pick on the saviour role is because deep down we want to be saved. Salvation is what we desire.

Someone to lean on. A rock solid support. To lower our guards and be present without a worry.

Then we are faced with the harsh realities and realise it's not as simple as we think it is.

Therefore, whenever we see someone in need our instinct activates and we automatically start babysitting. We fill the void by embodying the persona that we deeply crave in our life.

It's the Chiron in us. We take on the role of the wounded healer.

That's where you need to remind yourself you don't need an external person or support to protect you. Many times we are sold this idea that we are fixed by someone else.

It's your job to fix your own house. Not your neighbours.

Your body, your mental health is where your spirit lives. Others can aid you but at the end of the day you won't be trusting your house to a total stranger. It's you who takes control and dictates the course of it.

So kill this idea that someone out there is going to walk into your life and then everything will be rainbows and roses.

Fine, if you believe life is a Disney movie you can go ahead and kiss a couple of frogs to find your prince charming. Your life, your rules.

But don't be surprised if you catch a disease or two while kissing the frogs .

After all, I always say:

There are no fucking saviours in real life. You are your own saviour, darling.

And if you do want to be a mother badly there are plenty of orphaned kids out there you can spend some time with them rather than those ungrateful, therapy inducing, namesake adults.

[stardustprompts]

vicious  -  v.e. schwab  sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !!  some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying  tw :  death , murder , suicide , religious idealization , language , mental health

‘vandalizing school property again?’

everything stars with belief. with faith.’

‘fine, yeah, it’s stupid, right? you caught me.’

‘I don’t think you’re a bad person.’

‘it’s all a matter of perspective.’

‘did you know that when you take away a person’s fear of pain, you take away their fear of death? you make them, in their own eyes, immortal.’

‘someone tried to kill me.’

‘why would someone try to kill you?’

‘you asked me if I ever wanted to believe in something. I do. I want to believe in this.’

‘I want to believe that there’s more. that we could be more.’

‘nothing you ever do, (name), is meant to be theoretical. I see it in you.’

‘I think you’ve had enough.’

‘i’ll go first.’

‘actually, I’m feeling fine. better than. I feel wonderful. I feel like roses and sunshine and glitter.’

‘you need to live through this. you need to.’

‘my hero. now fuck off.’

‘you can’t do this alone. so promise me you won’t.’

‘have you lost your mind?’

‘we can get you help.’

‘this is crazy. you’re crazy.’

‘I want you to know that I will never, ever forgive you for this.’

‘did you love her? or are you just mad I took something back?’

‘I didn’t rat you out, you know. I could have.’

‘I don’t know who you are but you’re not (name). you’re something that’s crawled in his skin. a devil wearing him.’

‘something’s wrong, missing, gone. can’t you feel it? I can.’

‘admit it, you feel different, too. death takes something with it. what did it take from you?’

‘no one is going to hurt you, you know why? because I’ll hurt them first.’

‘would that be so bad? to create something extraordinary?’

‘all these roads lead to ruin.’

‘I died begging for the strength to survive and it was granted. but it’s a trade.’

‘it’s a trade, with god or the devil, and I’ve paid for my gift with the lives of my friends.’

‘i’m dangerous. I shouldn’t exist. but what gives you the right to kill me?’

‘everything about you is chock full of self - loathing. i’m not judging. I know the feeling.’

‘you know, maybe I should let you kill me.’

‘you’re right. even though we come back, something stays dead. lost. we forget something of who we are.’

‘it’s scary and wonderful and monstrous.’

‘you’re the hero … of your own story.’

‘what gives you the right to play judge and jury and executioner?’

‘want me to kiss it? will that make it better?’

‘I know you. I see you.’

‘I don’t want to be forgotten,’

‘tell you what. you remember me, and I’ll remember you, and that way we won’t be forgotten.’

‘that’s shit logic.’

‘you make cheating death sound so simple.’

‘being afraid and being unwilling are two different things.’

‘I don’t think you want to die.’

‘the world resists, when you break its rules.’

‘I see you’re still alive then. good choice.’

‘if u didn’t know better, i’d think you care.’

‘you think I’m wrong somehow. broken.’

‘I think we’re all broken.’

‘you can’t fix the dead, (name). and besides, it’s not your place to try.’

‘it’s not your place to control people’s lives.’

‘who taught you to sing so loud? the (name) I knew could barely chirp.’

‘I need you to be brave. I need you to be strong.’

‘there are worse ways to die. and worse things to do than die.’

‘I promise I’ll make it quick.’

‘there was a monster in there, long before you died.’

[ask-vaggie]

((OOC))

This is not a PSA I thought I'd have to make, but starting today I will no longer be accepting anons in my inbox — if you wanna send me an ask, it's gotta come from your actual Tumblr username — since some people have decided to start catfishing me by pretending to be my actual friends in my inbox. I got an ask today claiming to be from my close friend who runs the Charlie account I interact with, so I responded thinking nothing of it, only to be immediately told by her that it was, in fact, someone else! This is not the first time something like that's happened.

Look, I know the Lutualverse is getting popular, and I know people want to be a part of the RPs, but since all of the crazy shit we've been through a lot of us are already weary of outsiders and this does not boost your chances of getting "in." We've had problems with people lying about their ages, we've had stalkers, obsessive super fans, parasocial relationships. OVER A TUMBLR AU! There's a lot of blogs but I really don't think y'all understand how little people actually populate this AU. There's only like 8 or 9 of us with active blogs. We're literally just a friend group fucking around.

So just as a friendly reminder, you do not know us. We do not know you. We aren't celebrities, we aren't even micro celebrities, and this isn't some exclusive club. We're literally just a friend group pretending to be cartoon characters on the internet. Shocking!

So as a new general set of rules for my blog specifically:

No anons

No one 16- interacting

NO NSFW asks whatsoever (unless I know you personally and it's all in good fun)

No long starters outside of the Lutualverse (short asks and questions are fine)

No personal questions (I as the admin am irrelevant when I play a character)

And I reserve the right to refuse any asks that make me uncomfortable

I never want to be a bitch when I make these posts but this is getting ridiculous.