#⧽ &. you have to play by the fucking rules! → starters. ⧼

[kookooluvr]

Teach Me How To Love - Part 5

jeon jungkook, a fellow professor at yonsei university, is your friend, co-worker, and secret bed buddy. you have rules set in place to make sure there are no misunderstandings in your little arrangement. the #1 rule is as clear as day; no catching feelings. simple, right? wrong. let's see how un-simple it gets when a certain economics professor falls for an emotionally unavailable political science professor.

pairing: professor!jungkook x (fem) professor!reader, fwb to lovers

genre: fluff, angst, smut, fwb au, economicsprofessor!jungkook, politicalscienceprofessor!reader, slow burn, some emotional constipation, some sappy moments, lots of sexy moments.

rating: 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

w/c: 16k

warnings: the gang all head off to jeju, jk and oc have a little moment on the plane, jk's secret playlist for oc, jk and oc share a room thanks to tae, he gets hard from a few smoochies, oc finds out what jk said about her back when they met, some jealousy, she takes a step back before taking a step forward, some wholesome vibes, lots of yearning, cuddles, oc has a few realisations, volleyball on the beach, HANA AGAIN (she's a warning all on her own), very minor ankle injury, mentions of oc's past heartbreak, some angst + fluff on the beach, explicit sexual content; making out, shower sex, fingering (f. receiving), handjob (m. receiving), oral (m. receiving), unprotected sex (oc's on the pill you know the drill), a brief description of fluffy morning sex, nipple play, oral (f. receiving), sleepy missionary sex, overall fluffy ending.

a/n: i just want to thank you all for all the love and support this story has gotten so far, i love and appreciate you all so so much !!! i really hope you enjoy part 5 (this is a lengthy one ladies and gentlemen so be prepared) and please don't be shy to share your thoughts because i love hearing them okay bye 🫶🏼🫶🏼

taglist: @rpwprpwprpwprw @livinluvl @chxiosworld @mimi1097 @bumblebee-21s-blog @koosluvss @sou-17 @svnbangtansworld @junecat18 @shrek-the-destroyer @tastykookoonut @sturniolowrld @palomanazareth @chimmisbae @daskewl @ramyun-h @heyitsroshni @matryoshka-poetry @almatiarau @ambiee3 @gukkie7

find tmhtl masterlist here

find tmhtl playlist here

Today is just not your day. No, there wasn't an earthquake or a massive flood (it's far less dramatic than that) but more so minor inconveniences continuously piling up. For starters, Miso threw up on your bed, which was a fantastic start to the morning. You checked to make sure it wasn't anything serious, but it turns out she just had a hairball. Typical. Then there was an accident on the road around 10am, so you were stuck in traffic while taking Miso over to Jihyo's place where she'll be staying for the next few days. On top of that, you can't find your phone charger or your headphones and Jungkook is currently on his way to your apartment to pick you up to go to the airport, giving you very little time to get your shit together.

Mai and Namjoon and the rest of Jungkook's friends are all at the airport already, waiting for the flight which is set to leave at 2pm to take you all from Seoul to Jeju. Mai has been texting you nonstop to confirm that you're still going, and at one point you weren't sure if you should follow through, but you just couldn't disappoint her. The two of you are already becoming fast friends, and she seems pretty excited to have you come along with all of them. What's the harm in joining Jungkook and his friends on a three-day trip?

You're frantically checking to make sure you haven't forgotten to pack anything important, when your phone buzzes, signalling a text from Jungkook letting you know he's on his way up to your apartment. Well...fuck it. If you forgot anything, it's too late to stress about it now.

You scurry to make sure you have all your skincare products and toiletries before quickly zipping up your luggage. Minutes later there's a knock on your door, so you roll your suitcase to the living room and open the front door, feeling your stomach flip at the sight of him. He ditched his usual button-up shirt and slacks for a casual golfer and jeans, the denim hugging his thighs just right, the shirt's short sleeves showing off his thick biceps. His hair is styled a little messily, paired with his favourite black sunglasses. He looks like the lead role out of a rom-com, and that's not just because you're ovulating. Damn, maybe today is your day after all.

"Hey," he smiles, pushing his sunglasses to the top of his head to push back his hair. "You all set?"

"Yeah, let me just get my suitcase-"

"Lemme get that for you."

You reach for the handle of your suitcase, but he stops you and quickly gets it before you do. You have no problem carrying your own bags or rolling around a heavy suitcase, but Jungkook wouldn't be Jungkook if he wasn't a true gentleman, so you let him do it because you know he's just going to insist anyway.

"Oh, uhm, thanks," you murmur, watching his arm flex as he carries your suitcase out the apartment, giving you a chance to lock the door.

"It's no problem," he shrugs, flashing you a smile. The two of you walk to the elevators, going downstairs to his car in the parking lot. He unlocks the car and puts your suitcase next to his in the trunk, opening your door for you before making his way over to the driver's seat, the engine roaring to life.

The drive to the airport is a short one, but you use your time wisely, stealing little glances while he's not looking, taking in the way his muscles flex under his skin, the way his hair blows in the light breeze of the air conditioner, the way his skin glows under the summer sun. He's a gorgeous man, and you could stare at him for hours, but you mentally remind yourself to look away every time your thoughts get a little too carried away or the butterflies in your stomach flap their wings just a little too hard. He's not your boyfriend, and a three-day trip with him and his friends won't change that, even if your brain and your heart have been having a few disagreements about that lately.

"So...you ready for Jeju?" He asks, snapping you out of your daze.

"Yeah, the weather should be nice," you murmur, looking out the window as the other cars pass by.

"I hope you didn't feel obligated to come, y'know. I know Mai can be a bit pushy at times but she means well," he mutters, keeping his eyes straight ahead of him as he drives.

"No, no, I'm happy to come," you murmur. "I mean...I was pretty drunk when she initially invited me, so obviously I wasn't going to say no, but it's a free vacation. What type of person would I be to complain about that?"

You had insisted on paying for your own plane ticket to Jeju, but Mai just wasn't having any of that. She graciously offered to pay for your ticket because she invited you a bit last minute. You could have managed, but as Jungkook says, Mai can be a bit pushy. Not that you mind, you've actually started growing quite fond of her since you met that night at the club.

He glances over at you for a moment, then reluctantly looks away. He wishes he wasn't driving so that he could just keep staring. A few moments pass in comfortable silence before he speaks, his voice soft and contemplative. "I really am glad you decided to join."

You look over at him, a faint smile gracing your face. "Why? Because otherwise you'd have to use your hand instead of me?"

He scoffs, rolling his eyes. "No," he mutters, trying to sound annoyed but failing as a hint of amusement creeps onto his face. "Because I really enjoy your company, ___."

You try to remind yourself why you set so many rules and boundaries between the two of you, but you can barely hear your brain over the loud chattering of your heart. "Yeah...me too," you murmur softly, looking back out the window for the rest of the drive. This trip is surely going to be a test of your self-restraint, that's for sure.

At the airport, the two of you meet the rest of his friends, getting a tight hug from an excited Mai, hearing Namjoon chuckle at his fiancée's enthusiasm.

"Mai, c'mon, you're suffocating her," Jungkook jokes, greeting the rest of his friends with a pat on their back. Everyone is excited to get to Jeju, a few of them already talking about going down to the beach once they land. It'll be a nice get-away from the concrete jungle that is Seoul.

"Oh, I'm sorry, ___," she chuckles, pulling away to go and stand next to Namjoon, looking like a puppy being taken on a walk. "I'm just so happy we're all together."

"It's okay," you murmur with a smile. "Thank you again for inviting me, Mai."

"Of course! You're Jungkook's friend, so you're our friend now too."

Her words bring a strange, warm feeling to your chest. You've only ever had a handful of friends in your life, Jihyo being your right-hand woman. You're so used to keeping people at arm's length, so to have his friends be so willing to accept you into their friend group is new, and just slightly intimidating.

Everyone hangs out in the waiting area until it's time for the flight. Jisoo and Seokjin have a little argument about whether he turned the stove off before they left the house, Namjoon and Mai discuss everything they want the group to do in Jeju, while Hoseok, Yoongi, Taehyung and Jimin are already thinking about what's for dinner tonight.

Much to Jungkook's dismay, Hana is here as well, so he quickly goes to sit with you before she can start up a conversation with him. She watches the way he not so subtly flirts with you, the way you try to act indifferent, despite the occasional chuckle you let out at one of his dumb jokes. It makes her blood boil.

Hana's not an idiot. She knows something is going on between the two of you, but she also knows that Jungkook would be showing you off if you were his girlfriend. She can't figure out exactly what it is you two have going on, but she doesn't like it. On the plane, she finds it annoying that he insists on putting your suitcase up in the overhead compartment for you, and she mentally rolls her eyes when he sits next to you, leaving her to sit next to Hoseok and Yoongi.

Jungkook on the other hand is quite happy to be seated next to you, after subtly shoving Taehyung out of that seat, leaving his friend to sit in the next row. Not that Taehyung minds, he'll anyway just end up texting a certain friend of yours throughout the flight, which he spent all of last night doing as well.

"I made this new playlist on Spotify," Jungkook quips as he gets his phone out, putting one of his earphones in before holding the other one out for you. "Wanna hear?"

You move closer and place the earphone in your ear with a smile, looking down at his phone to see the title ___'s playlist on the screen. That was definitely not meant for your eyes. At least not yet.

"Hey, what's that?" you ask, but he quickly scrolls past it before you can get a proper look at it.

"Hm? Oh no, that's nothing. Here it is," he mutters quickly, his movements a bit panicked as he clicks on a playlist called Jeju Summer. You'll have to ask him about that other playlist another time. He hits play and the first song is by Beabadoobee, causing your eyebrows to raise in surprise.

"I didn't know you listened to Beabadoobee," you chuckle.

"What, are you making fun of me?" he asks with an amused smile and a raised eyebrow.

"No, of course not. I love her, I just wouldn't have pegged you to listen to this sorta music, that's all."

"Well...maybe you have a few more things to learn about me, Professor," he teases, looking over at you with a soft smile, the catchy melody playing through his earphones.

The songs play one by one, some a bit slower than others, causing your eyes to slowly fall closed, your head lowering to rest on his shoulder. The weight of your head on his shoulder brings a smile to his face, his head resting against yours for the remainder of the flight. He scrolls back to the playlist he made for you and hits play, letting out a soft sigh as 'The Only Exception' by Paramore starts to play. The playlist isn't finished yet, but he hopes to gain the courage to show it to you some day.

Hana watches the exchange from her seat, mentally cursing you. She has no claim over Jungkook, but that doesn't make it sting any less, and if her eyes were daggers, you'd be dead by now. She has to force herself to look away from the two of you, her face growing hot with jealousy. She can't quite remember why she even wanted to come on this trip in the first place.

Once the group arrives in Jeju, everyone splits into separate groups to go over to Mai's family's beach house. Seokjin, Jisoo, Namjoon and Mai share a car, while Yoongi, Hoseok, Hana and Jimin all drive together, leaving you, Jungkook and Taehyung to drive together in the third car.

Jungkook packs everyone's luggage in the trunk of the rental car and gets the engine running. You sit in the passenger seat, leaving Taehyung to sit on the back seat. It's a beautiful day in Jeju, the waves crashing as you all drive down the scenic route. Jungkook occasionally steals glances at you while he drives, causing Taehyung to stifle a big grin. He can't tell if you're oblivious to his friend's obvious affection toward you, or if you're just choosing to ignore it. Either way, it's quite amusing for him to witness first hand.

"I wonder how many rooms there are at this house," Taehyung mumbles, looking out at the view. "I'm sure a few people will have to share, huh?"

"Well, obviously each couple will share a room," Jungkook murmurs.

"Right...Joon and Mai, Jin and Jisoo, you and-"

"Wow! Look at that view!" Jungkook interjects before he can go any further, shooting his friend a narrow-eyed look in the rear-view mirror, Taehyung pretending to seal his lips. The rest of the drive is filled with the soft sounds of the radio playing, paired with the sounds and smell of the ocean outside.

It's a thirty-minute drive before you all get to the beach house. Jungkook pulls up into the driveway and gets out, going around to open your door for you. Once you get out the car, your eyes widen in awe of the stunning house. It's a big two-story home with six bedrooms, large windows and the beach right at its feet. Some of the others are already there, Jisoo and Mai already setting up and unpacking the groceries in the kitchen.

You, Jungkook and Taehyung get your luggage from the trunk and make your way inside. Mai makes sure to give you a little tour of the house while the others chat in the kitchen, showing you around the bottom and top floor to make sure you know where everything is. Once everyone has arrived at the house, the group gathers in the living room, getting comfortable to decide who's taking what room.

"We hope you all don't mind but Mai and I will be taking the master bedroom," Namjoon grins, already heading upstairs to take their luggage to their room, the one with a king-sized bed and a gorgeous view of the beach, leaving everyone else to decide on their rooms. Seokjin and Jisoo get the second biggest bedroom, the one upstairs with a queen-sized bed and a big tub in the en-suite. Hoseok suggests him and Yoongi share one of the bedrooms with two single beds, and he accepts, mainly because he could care less where he sleeps.

As everyone begins to pair off for the remainder of the rooms, the reality of the situation slowly starts to sink in. There are five people left, and only three more rooms.

"Jimin and I will share a room," Taehyung calls out, shooting Jungkook a look, subtly gesturing over to you with his eyes. He knows his friend wants to share a room with you, better yet, he knows his friend does not want to share a room with Hana.

"___, you're new to the group. You should get your own room," Mai suggests.

Dammit Mai.

Jungkook looks over at you, swallowing thickly at the thought of having to share the last room with Hana, who happens to be visibly pleased.

"I think that's a great idea!" Hana quips with a sly grin. "Kookie and I can share, and his friend can have her own room. I mean, who doesn't want their own room, right, ___?"

"Oh, uhhh..." You don't quite know what to say. You glance over at Jungkook, his eyes boring a hole through you, practically begging you to decline. You're a guest in Mai's family's home, so you should probably just take what you get, even if the thought of Jungkook and Hana sleeping in a bed together makes your stomach turn.

"Hana, why don't you take the single room instead?" Taehyung blurts out with a sickeningly sweet smile, causing Hana to whip her head in his direction. "___ is Jungkook's friend so I think it would only make sense for them to share a room. You said it yourself; who doesn't want their own room...right?"

Hana's eyes dart between you and Jungkook, her jaw clenching. She had clearly hoped to get a room with Jungkook in hopes of getting closer to him, but with everyone's expectant eyes on her, Taehyung leaves her no choice. She forces a smile and pretends to be thrilled about having her own room for these next three days.

"Yeah, perfect," she mutters through gritted teeth.

Jungkook keeps his expression schooled, even as his heart bangs against his ribcage. The two of you will be sharing a room. He shoots Taehyung a grateful smile, silently thanking his friend for doing what he couldn't do. Internally, he's ecstatic, but externally he remains nonchalant. He knows you still have your boundaries and your rules and all that, so he leans over to whisper in your ear from his seat on the arm of the couch, making sure no one else can hear. "Are you okay with this?"

You turn your head to look up at him, your heart racing at the thought of sharing a room with him for three days. You're not sure if it's nerves or excitement, but you nod and give him a faint smile. Some rules are meant to be broken on vacation anyway.

He mirrors your smile, his eyes having a hard time looking away from your face. "It's fine with us," he announces, standing up to grab your luggage and take it to the room.

You follow him to your room and gently close the door behind you, your eyes trailing over the double bed you'll be sharing. The room itself is quite spacious with a big window, allowing the late afternoon sea breeze to travel inside. There is an en-suite bathroom and a waterfall shower, but all you can think about is that bed and what might happen in it in the nights to come.

You both start unpacking, the room slowly starting to feel like your own, your skincare products placed neatly on the bathroom counter, your clothing hanging in the shared closet. You hang up the last of your clothing while Jungkook goes to sit at the edge of the bed, watching you with a faint smile on his face.

"You sure you're okay with us sharing a room? Because I can sleep on the couch in the living room if you-"

"Don't be ridiculous," you chuckle, walking over to stand between his thighs, your hands on your hips. "I'm not letting you sleep on the couch on vacation. You'd probably just end up complaining about a crick in your neck and I don't wanna have that on my conscience."

He lets out a huff of laughter, shaking his head in amusement. "I guess you're right, yeah."

His laughter dies down, his face softening into a smile, his big brown eyes staring up at you, his hands reaching out to trail up your thighs, his thumbs rubbing slow circles over the fabric of your leggings. "Seriously though, I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"Jungkook, I'm okay."

"Can I get a kiss to prove it?" he whispers, staring up at you like he's been dying to ask since he picked you up from your apartment.

You let out a soft scoff and lean down to cup his face in your hands, leaning in to press a soft peck to his lips.

"Another one please," he whispers, his lips just millimetres from yours, his big brown eyes pleading as he stares up at you. You smile and close the gap, pressing another kiss to his lips, this one lasting slightly longer.

"One more."

"You're greedy."

"For you, yes."

You're about to respond, when there's a knock at the door, causing you to jolt up straight, backing away from him to avoid getting caught by any of his friends. "Come in!"

Jisoo peeks her head in, completely oblivious to the moment you had going on. "Hey, we're getting started on dinner, okay? It shouldn't be long."

"Thanks, Soo," Jungkook murmurs, standing up to subtly adjust his jeans, his back turned to her.

As soon as Jisoo leaves and the door closes, your eyes trail down to see Jungkook's situation, a little chuckle bubbling up your throat.

"Are you seriously hard from a few kisses?"

"Shut up, your kisses feel good, okay?" he mumbles, a faint pout on his lips.

You bite your lip to hold back the smile spreading across your face, his words sending a rush of pride through your chest. You glance over at the bathroom door before grabbing some underwear and a flowy dress from the closet to wear to dinner. "I'm gonna go take a shower before dinner, okay?"

"Yeah," he nods, his eyes growing wide as you turn around and press one last kiss to his lips before disappearing into the en-suite, the bathroom door shutting behind you.

Jungkook plops down onto the bed with his arms splayed out, a big grin spread across his face as he stares up at the ceiling. A few kisses and he's putty in your hands.

The smell of food fills your nose as you leave the room for dinner, the others coming in and out of the kitchen. Jisoo sets the table while Seokjin and Yoongi finish up on dinner, with the others hanging out in the living room. You want to make yourself useful in any way that you can, so you go to the kitchen to check if anyone needs any help.

"___, can you help me set the table?" Jisoo asks, handing you a few plates.

You get to work, placing a plate at each place setting while she adds the utensils and the glasses. She doesn't seem to talk much, which is quite the opposite of Mai, which is probably why they're best friends. They balance each other out. That seems to be the case for Jungkook's entire friend group. Each person has their person who seems to balance out their personality. Yoongi has Hoseok, Jisoo has Mai and Mai has Namjoon, and so on. This leaves you questioning who your person is. Maybe it's the man who can't seem to keep his big brown eyes off of you for more than a few seconds at a time as he attempts to stay focused on his conversation with Hoseok and Namjoon.

"You know," Jisoo murmurs, keeping her eyes down as she gently places the utensils next to each plate. "You must be really special for Jungkook to bring you around."

Her words puzzle you. "How so?"

She looks over at you, a soft smile spreading across her face. "You're the first woman Jungkook's ever introduced us to. Even if you are just his friend...you must be a very special friend."

You look down at the stack of plates in your hands, her words ringing through your head. "I suppose so..."

As if on cue, Jungkook walks into the dining room, slowly rounding the table to get to you, placing a gentle hand on your lower back. "Need any help?"

"I think we can manage," you murmur softly, looking up into his eyes.

Jisoo looks between the two of you with a knowing smile, leaving to get the salads from the kitchen. She knows that look, the way you look at him. It's the same look she used to give Seokjin in university, the look she still gives him even after three kids. She doesn't know you that well yet, but she has a sneaky suspicion she'll be seeing a lot more of you.

Everyone eventually sits down for dinner, Jungkook sitting on your left and Mai on your right. The atmosphere around the table is bubbly, everyone chatting and discussing their plans for the next two days in Jeju.

"We're so playing volleyball tomorrow," Hoseok announces. "Everyone in?"

"Soo and I will be sitting this one out," Seokjin murmurs with an apologetic smile.

"Boooo!" Jimin teases, rolling his eyes. "Hyung, c'mon!"

"Sorry, we're going for a walk," he shrugs.

"A walk?" Namjoon scoffs. "Is that code for sex?"

Seokjin lets out a hearty laugh, giving Namjoon an exasperated look. "You try having three kids. Cut us some slack!"

"Okay, so Jin and Jisoo are out," Hoseok says, rolling his eyes at the couple who don't seem to care, Jisoo placing a soft kiss on her husband's cheek.

"Me too," Yoongi murmurs, chewing on some of the samgyeopsal. "I wanna catch up on some reading."

Hoseok scoffs, muttering a teasing, "Get a load of Stephen Hawking over here".

"I'm in," Jimin calls out. "I still have to kick your ass for the last volleyball game."

"Yeah, me too. I can't believe we lost to Hobi," Taehyung sighs, shaking his head. "Kook?"

"I'm still deciding," Jungkook murmurs with a faint grin, taking a sip of his beer. His response is mostly just to tease Hoseok.

You look over at him, then over at Hoseok, who seems to be waiting for your verdict. "I'm in."

"See, I knew I liked you, ___," Hoseok smiles. "Kook, why didn't you bring her around sooner? I'm already starting to like her more than you."

Jungkook doesn't protest. He simply glances over at you with a soft smile on his face, watching as you talk to his friends. It feels so natural to have you here, like you're a puzzle piece that's been missing all this time. You just fit.

All throughout dinner, he finds little ways to maintain contact with you. He touches your thigh under the table, he rests his arm over the back of your chair, he lazily plays with the ends of your hair while you make conversation with Taehyung about work. It's his subtle way of showing his affection without outright saying what he feels.

After dinner, his friends decide to sit around the patio and roast some marshmallows on the fire that Seokjin lit. Hana chose to go to her room with the excuse of not feeling too well so that she doesn't have to tell the truth, which is that she would rather bang her head against a wall than sit and watch Jungkook make heart eyes at you for another second.

Everyone else gets cozy outside. The sun has already set, the moon and stars illuminating the seaside while the waves crash in the distance. You sit next to Jungkook on one of the patio loveseats, the fire crackling as he holds out a charred marshmallow on a skewer.

"Mai, is everything finalised for the wedding?" Jisoo asks, snuggling up to Seokjin under a thick blanket on one of the other loveseats.

"I have my final dress fitting next week and the venue is stunning! We can't wait for you guys to see it," Mai gushes, her eyes sparkling as she talks about her wedding. "We're really excited."

"Damn, the second couple in our friend group is getting married," Yoongi sighs. "We're getting old."

"Speak for yourself," Taehyung scoffs, playfully elbowing his friend.

"Weddings are always so exciting," Jisoo sighs blissfully. "I remember how happy I was at our wedding. I think that was honestly the happiest day of my life...and when the boys were born of course," she chuckles.

You stare down at the fire burning away, your eyes slightly glossy as you zone in on the low flames. Wedding-talk always gets you a bit choked up, but the last thing you want to do is take away from Mai and Namjoon's moment, so you blink away the moisture building in your eyes and swallow the lump in your throat.

Of course Jungkook notices. He can sense something is wrong by the way your shoulders tense up, the way your eyes remain fixed on the fire. He doesn't want to draw any attention to you, so he leans closer, keeping his voice down. "Hey, everything okay?" he whispers, gently snaking an arm around your waist.

You snap out of your daze to look at him, inhaling sharply, the cool evening breeze working fast to dry your eyes. "Mhm," you nod, looking out at the ocean in the distance. "I'm fine, just...a bit tired."

"You wanna head inside?"

"No, I'm fine."

He doesn't push. He takes your word for it, even though he knows you're anything but fine. He knows you won't tell him what's on your mind, so he lets it go and gently squeezes your waist through the fabric of your dress, a simple way of saying that he's here for you through whatever it is that seems to be bothering you.

"Hey, she was hot!" Jimin exclaims exasperatedly.

"She threatened to hit you with her car," Namjoon laughs.

The conversation seems to have taken a different turn while you and Jungkook got distracted, his friends reminiscing about their failed relationships. Namjoon and Mai's upcoming wedding has them all thinking about their own love lives, some a bit less significant than others.

"What can I say, I like my girls with a touch of psycho," Jimin laughs, earning an amused snort from Taehyung.

"Hey, remember that woman Kook told us about a few years ago who was apparently sooo gorgeous," Hoseok chuckles. "What ever happened to her, man?"

"Yeah, you never told us her name," Yoongi chimes in, giving Jungkook a puzzled look. "You went on and on about how smart and-"

Jungkook clears his throat loudly, subtly signaling for them to 'zip it', his eyes briefly flickering over to you before you even catch it. "She died," he deadpans, earning a loud laugh from Hoseok.

"You're so full of bullshit," he laughs, shaking his head. He would never laugh at something so tragic, but come on. It's so obvious Jungkook just wants this topic to end.

You glance over at him, seeing the way he looks down at the wooden patio floor, his cheeks flushed. You wonder who they're talking about and why you've never heard him talk about this "gorgeous" woman before. You don't want to ask him about it. You don't want to know. Or do you? You feel weird. It's like you're...jealous or something. You're not jealous, that's ridiculous. It's just curiosity. And possibly acid reflux. Well, good for her, whoever she is.

Jungkook lets out a silent sigh of relief when the guys don't question him any further, the topic changing to something else, something you don't really take notice of because you're still too busy wondering who this woman is, or was. Maybe another professor at work? Or maybe she was a neighbour, or even just someone in passing, like a cashier at the grocery store or a waitress at a restaurant.

You're so busy wondering who it could be, you don't even realize you're shivering until he mentions it. "Are you cold?"

"A little," you murmur, rubbing your arms, feeling the goosebumps that have risen.

"I'll go get you a blanket. I'll be right back."

You watch as he gets up and goes inside the house to get you a blanket, your eyes following behind him even when he's out of your line of sight. Mai notices and scoots closer.

"Are you thinking about what Hobi said? About the woman Jungkook wouldn't stop talking about?"

"What?" Your eyebrows raise in faux surprise. "No, why would I be thinking about that?"

Mai smiles, seeing right through your lie. "Okay, well...just so you know...if Hobi actually paid enough attention, he'd remember that Jungkook went on and on about the gorgeous political science professor he met at work...but you didn't hear that from me," she whispers, playfully zipping her lips.

Mai's words make you freeze in your spot, your lips parting, the lightbulb going off in your brain. You know he finds you attractive. Obviously, he's having sex with you, for God's sake. But hearing that he spoke to his friends about you all those years ago when you first met...it feels different. It has a different connotation. You don't speak about a friend like that, do you? Well, you're not just friends, but you're not his either. Being his is a concept you've noticed reoccurring in your head a lot lately, but one you have yet to acknowledge. It's scary to think about. Being his doesn't feel scary, but the thought of being vulnerable enough to lay yourself out there to be hurt is scary.

You're snapped back to reality when Jungkook returns and sits down next to you, gently draping a warm blanket around your shoulders, an even warmer smile on his face.

"Better?" he whispers.

"Better," you whisper.

That look on his face. It makes everything feel less scary. It makes your heart beat faster and your stomach feel all tingly. It's a look you've grown accustomed to. It's a feeling you've started growing accustomed to.

The evening slowly draws to a close and everyone starts saying their goodnights, going off to their rooms. Jungkook goes to your room and you're about to join him but you're stopped by Mai in the hallway.

"Hey," she whispers. "Please don't tell Jungkook I told you about the whole 'gorgeous professor' thing. He'd probably kill me."

You chuckle, storing the information in a locked safe in your brain. "I won't say anything."

"Okay. I just don't want him to think I'm meddling, y'know."

"There's nothing to meddle in, Mai. We're just-"

"Friends...right," she chuckles, nodding in understanding, even though her facial expression tells you she still doesn't believe you. She knows there's more to the story. The chemistry between you and Jungkook is too strong to be just friends.

"Don't give me that look."

"What look? There's no look," she laughs.

"There so is a look," you chuckle, shaking your head.

"I'm just saying...I'm not trying to pry, I just...l kinda have a feeling there's more going on. There's a whole vibe between you two."

"The 'vibe' is called friendship," you deadpan.

At this point you aren't sure if you're trying to convince Mai or yourself, but it's a habit at this point to deny any romantic connection between you and Jungkook. It saves you from answering a million questions.

"Okay, okay. If you say so, I believe you," she chuckles, holding her hands up in surrender. "I'll let you go before your 'friend' starts looking for you," she teases, biding you goodnight before going upstairs to join Namjoon in the master bedroom.

You make your way into your room and close the door behind you, finding Jungkook sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for you. "Hey."

"Hey yourself," he murmurs with a soft smile, holding his arms out as you make your way over to him, his hands sliding up to hold onto your waist, his eyes looking up at you. There isn't too much light in the room except for the bedside light and the moonlight streaming in through the large window.

"What were you and Mai talking about out there?"

"Girl stuff, I can't tell you," you tease, you lips curling into a grin.

Jungkook playfully rolls his eyes, a smile playing on his lips. "Oh, girl stuff, huh? So secret and exclusive," he murmurs with a mock pout.

"Yeah, it's confidential. Sorry," you chuckle, reaching out to gently run your fingers through his hair.

"Not even a hint? C'mon, baby..."

"My lips are sealed, Jeon."

Jungkook tilts his head back to look up at you properly, a hint of yearning in his gaze. He can barely focus on your words when you look so pretty standing before him. He can't wait to break in the bed with you, but he'll remain patient for now.

"Yeah?" he grins, biting his bottom lip. "Maybe I could get you to open them, hm?"

"Behave yourself," you whisper, your eyes slowly trailing down to his lips and back up. "Your friends are just down the hall."

"So? Let them hear us, I don't care."

You have to mentally remind yourself that you're not alone and that you don't want his friends hearing the things the two of you get up to behind closed doors. You muster up your strength to pull away from him, feeling like a magnet resisting his pull.

"You're crazy. I'm gonna go get ready for bed." You go to get your pyjamas from the closet and make your way to the bathroom, closing the door behind you.

Jungkook waits for you while you change, chewing on his bottom lip as he stares at the bathroom door. He slowly removes his shirt and his shoes, leaning back on his hands. He looks up as you emerge from the bathroom, standing in the open doorframe, your face glowing from the serum you used, your toothbrush in your mouth. He sees the way your eyes trail down his bare chest, the way your pupils dilate ever so subtly.

"You look cute," he murmurs with a lazy grin, his head tilted to the side as he watches you from the bed.

"Don't I always?" you tease, spitting the toothpaste foam into the sink before rinsing your mouth and walking out of the bathroom.

"Yes, but...I like you like this, in your cute pyjamas, your hair up, bare-faced," he murmurs, getting up from the bed to make his way over to you. He stands behind you at the sink, his hands trailing around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder.

"You gonna let me take these cute pyjamas off you?" he whispers. "I'll do that thing you like with my tongue."

His words go straight to your core, a faint blush spreading across your cheeks. You turn around to face him, your hands resting upon his bare chest as you look up into his eyes.

"What do you say? You wanna break in the bed?"

You look up into his eyes, your heart telling you to give in and let him do whatever he wants with you, your brain telling you that the walls are thin, that it's risky. Taehyung and Jimin's room is right next door, and if you can hear their muffled conversation, they'll be able to hear all the things Jungkook so badly wants to do to you.

"Maybe we should...wait...until we get back home..."

His brows furrow in confusion. That's not what he was expecting.

"Wait, what? Why?"

"Your friends could hear us."

"___, I meant what I said. I don't care if they hear us."

"But I care," you whisper, gently cupping his cheeks in your hands. "I just...I don't think we should risk it."

He sighs, but he understands why you're hesitant. He already let it slip to Taehyung that you're hooking up, breaking his promise of keeping it between the two of you. He doesn't want the rest of his friends finding out, especially not by hearing the two of you have sex. It would just bring about a million questions that he himself does not have the answers to.

"Okay. I understand," he sighs, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. "I'll just take a quick shower and get ready for bed."

He closes the bathroom door once you leave, but he doesn't lock it. A part of him wants you to walk back in and tell him that you changed your mind. He wants you to stop worrying so much and just let him love you the way he wants to. When he stands under the hot stream of water and lathers himself in his body wash, he wishes you were in there with him, letting him lather your body as well. He wishes you'd allow yourself to be taken care of. Sure he takes care of your sexual needs, but who runs you a nice warm bath after you've had a stressful day at work? Who makes you soup when you're sick or holds you in the middle of the night when you're having a bad dream? He could be that person for you if you'd just let him.

He wants to say 'fuck it' and change your mind, convince you to just let loose of the reins for a bit, but when he opens the bathroom door and finds you laying on your back in bed, with tired eyes and a soft smile on your face, all he really wants is to just lay by your side. He doesn't need the sex. A simple touch of your hand on his cheek is enough for him if it means he gets to be close to you.

He gets in bed, propping his head up on his hand, his eyes looking down at you. His hand snakes around to the side of your waist, keeping his grip gentle. "Those eyes look heavy. I thought people are supposed to stay up late on vacation."

"Yeah, when you're twenty-one. I'm not twenty-one anymore," you mumble through a soft chuckle, your sleepy eyes gazing up at him.

"Right, I forgot you're sixty-three with a hip replacement."

You let out a huff of laughter, the sound bringing a wide grin to his face. As your laughter dies down, you notice the way he looks at you, as if he's hypnotised by you.

"What?"

Jungkook's lips curl into a little smile when he realises he's been caught staring. "What?" he echoes, playing coy. "Can't I just admire a good-looking view?" he quips, his tone light and playful.

"I suppose I can't blame you," you murmur, your grin turning a bit more playful. "I'd stare too if I were you."

"Oh, you're so modest, aren't you?" He scoffs.

You chuckle, your eyes fluttering closed, and Jungkook's heart swells in his chest. Your smile is so soft, so genuine, it's infectious. He can't tear his eyes away from you, the way your lashes lay gently against your cheeks, the way your lips curve up at the edges. He reaches out without thinking, gently brushing a stray lock of hair away from your face, his touch light and tentative.

"___," he whispers.

"Yeah?"

There's a moment of utter silence before he speaks, his voice soft and delicate.

"You're an incredibly beautiful woman."

Suddenly, words are lost on you. You can't seem to find a response that would appropriately correlate with the way his words make you feel, so you show him instead. You lean in and press a gentle, tender kiss to his lips, your hand reaching up to cup the side of his jaw. It's slow and soft, and it steals his breath for a second. When you pull away, his eyes look slightly dreamy and his smile looks a bit dazed.

"Can we make that a regular thing?"

"What?"

"I mean...can we forget about the whole no kissing outside of sex thing? I just wanna kiss you...whenever it feels right..."

You pause, contemplating his words. You can't lie and say that you don't want that, because lord knows you do.

"We'll see," you whisper, smiling as you lean in for another kiss, and then another.

He knows what that smile means. It means you want it too, you're just too damn stubborn to outright admit it, as if him kissing you is so scandalous. He doesn't care, your unclear answer doesn't upset him. The way your lips can't seem to stray from his for longer than a few seconds tells him everything he needs to know.

"We'll see, huh?" He smiles, wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you closer to him, rolling onto his back with your body halfway on top of him. He enjoys the simple intimacy of just having your head on his chest, his fingers languidly running through your hair.

"Yeah, we'll see," you whisper, laying your head down on his chest, where it remains for the rest of the night.

You're very cautious about cuddling. You don't cuddle after sex, and don't usually cuddle outside of sex either. Your heart is far too weak for that and you know that one good cuddle from the right man will have you throwing all your rules out the window, so when you wake up and that man isn't cuddling you like you had secretly hoped he would, you're met with disappointment.

You slowly open your eyes, blinking in the bright morning light that streams through the large window, the sea air drifting through your nose. As you come to, you notice that the other side of the bed is empty. Your thoughts linger on the person who is supposed to be on the other side of the bed, and you find yourself missing him, yearning to see his face, his fluffy hair, his pretty eyes. You slowly push yourself up into a sitting position, contemplating getting out of bed to find him.

Just as you're about to get up, however, the door to the bedroom opens and Jungkook walks in, carrying two mugs of coffee. As soon as his eyes land on you in bed, his face lights up with a smile.

"You're awake," he murmurs, his voice still a little groggy from sleep. He walks over to the bed and hands you one of the mugs.

"You went to get me coffee?" You still feel a bit groggy as you look down at the mug in your hand, smelling the delicious aroma.

"Of course," he smiles, sliding onto the edge of the bed beside you. "I figured you might need some caffeine to fully wake up."

Jungkook watches as you take a tentative sip of the coffee, enjoying the feeling of seeing you this early in the morning, still so sleepy, your hair a little messy, your lips slightly swollen, your cheeks flushed. He cherishes these moments, seeing you so vulnerable and unguarded in the morning. It's a side of you that he rarely gets to see, and he'll never take it for granted.

"Once you finish that, you have to get up because we're heading down to the beach around 9:30-ish."

"Damn...Hoseok really takes his volleyball seriously, huh?"

"He does," he chuckles, shaking his head in amusement. "I'm gonna go get ready while you have your coffee."

He rounds the bed to get to his suitcase, pulling out his swimming shorts before making his way to the bathroom to change, giving you a moment to yourself.

You find yourself missing his presence as soon as the bathroom door closes, which is odd. You're not a clingy person. You like your space. You don't like spending every minute of every day with someone. Yet, here you are, impatiently waiting for his return after a simple trip to the bathroom to change. Maybe it's because you know that when he walks out of that bathroom, he'll be wearing half the amount of clothing he wore going in, or maybe your impatience is your body going through withdrawals after asking him to withold sex until you get home, which you think you're starting to regret.

You don't know what's going on with you lately. First, last night's jealousy at the thought of Jungkook finding another woman attractive (and the immediate relief when said woman turned out to be you), then the cuddling in bed, and then the disappointment of not waking up in his arms this morning.

It's not long before the bathroom door opens and he walks out in all his glory, his torso bare and toned, his shorts adorning his hips. A fresh cup of coffee and a nice view of a very attractive, half-naked man all within twenty minutes of waking up is surely a good way to start the day.

His presence alone is confirmation that you definitely regret asking him to withhold sex until you get home. It's confirmation that you were jealous last night, and that you were disappointed when he wasn't in bed with you when you woke up this morning.

"Actually, uh..." He stops in his tracks, his attention back on you. "You guys go and I'll meet you at the beach in a little bit."

"Are you sure?" He tilts his head in confusion.

"Yeah, you go, I'll be down in a bit."

He's hesitant to leave, having planned on going together, but he assumes you just want to catch up on a few more minutes of rest. "Okay...I'll see you down there," he murmurs with a smile before making his way out to join the others.

You set your coffee down on the nightstand and plop back down on the bed, your eyes staring up at the ceiling. You have so much going on in your head and your heart, and the two won't stop butting heads. You know this feeling. You know what love feels like. You've been there before, and you didn't like how it ended, which is exactly why you locked the big padlock on your heart and threw away the key. Yet, when you close your eyes and Jungkook's face pops up in your head, and his voice rings through your ears, a soft smile works its way onto your face.

When you're with him, you just want to kiss his cheek and listen to him ramble on and on about international trade and supply and demand. You want to suck his dick, then hold his hand and tell him how smart, and kind, and pretty he is. Oh how pretty he is. You want to partake in all of his nerdy interests with him and ask him questions about it just to see him get excited.

You threw that damn key away and you thought you'd never need it again, but somehow, Jungkook must have stumbled upon it and picked it up because it seems to be in his possession.

You can't stay here and let your thoughts run wild any longer. You have to get out of this room and get down to that beach.

It's still quite early yet the sun is already scorching, the sand warm and toasty beneath your feet. The smell of salty air and sunscreen fills your senses, a perfect combination for a summer day. You spot Mai in her cute bikini, tanning on the sand, so you make your way over to her while some of the others set up a volleyball net, Hoseok and Namjoon's excited chattering echoing in the distance.

"Wooow, hot mama," Mai hoots, her chin resting in her palm while she tans her back, her sunglasses pushed up to the top of her head. The 'hotness' she's referring to might be the red bikini adorning your body, the red bikini you picked out with Jungkook's reaction in mind...but who knows for sure?

"Speak for yourself," you chuckle, laying down beside her, the sun beating down on your back. "I bet Namjoon loves that bikini, huh?"

"Honey, he'll be taking this bikini off of me later," she cackles, shooting a flirty wave over to her fiancé in the distance.

Namjoon's eyes aren't the only ones occupied. Jungkook can't help but stare, his eyes hungrily raking over your form. He's supposed to be partaking in a conversation with Taehyung and Jimin, but he's so distracted, his thoughts consumed by the sight of you in that bikini, his gaze firmly planted to your smooth skin, the roundness of your ass, those legs. It hasn't even been a full 24 hours yet and the lack of sex is already proving to be rather difficult.

"What're you guys talking about?" There's that damn nagging voice, Hana joining their conversation, the conversation Jungkook couldn't care less about right now.

"Jimin and I were talking about what we'd do if we were the only people left on earth," Taehyung quips. "And Jungkook appears to no longer be with us."

Jungkook lets out a scoff, shaking his head in amusement, his eyes still glued to you while you converse with Mai in the distance.

Hana follows his line of sight and subtly rolls her eyes, letting out a soft sigh of frustration. "Kookie, what would you do if you and I were the only people left on earth?"

"Probably buy a gun," he mutters under his breath before walking off in your direction, leaving behind two highly amused friends and an offended Hana.

He makes his way over, sitting down next to you without a word, both of your faces turning into a grin at the mere proximity. "Hey ladies," he murmurs, getting comfortable while a few of the guys play a practice round of volleyball.

"Kook," Mai nods in acknowledgement, her eyes shifting to the water ahead. "I was just saying how hot your friend is."

"Mm, she's okay, I guess," he shrugs with a teasing grin, leaning back on his hands.

"I'm right here you know," you scoff.

"Trust me, I see you."

You're lucky Mai's eyes are on the water a few feet away, because if she were to turn her head and look at Jungkook, she'd see his hand trailing up your thigh, giving your asscheek a quick squeeze before you silently swat it away, a bashful smile on your face. You turn your head to him to mouth a silent 'stop' but he simply shoots you a mischievous wink.

That face paired with that wink gets you, and you might have let him continue if Hoseok hadn't called everyone to start the game of volleyball.

Everyone gathers and divides into two teams on opposite sides of the net, the air already filled with playful bickering and competitive banter. Jungkook, Taehyung, Jimin and you are on one side, while Namjoon, Mai, Hoseok and Hana are on the other.

The game begins and the competitive spirit sparks, everyone focused on their team winning. When you agreed to play, you didn't expect the game to be so intense, full of spikes, blocks and a few dives. You especially didn't expect to bond this well with his friends, the group making you feel like you've known them for years. You share high-fives and amusing words with his friends every time something exciting happens, feeling the synergy in the air.

Jungkook watches you as you run across the sand to get to the ball, admiring your agility. You certainly make a good team, sharing a bit of a competitive streak. The two of you work together to score against the other team in a tough back and forth, your excitement too much to contain when Namjoon fumbles the ball on their side of the net.

The point given to your team is shoved to the back of your mind when Jungkook rushes over to wrap his arms around your waist, spinning you off your feet. The adrenaline mixed with the contact of his skin on yours sends a dizzying, electrifying feeling through your body. The two of you laugh and cheer while Taehyung and Jimin shout taunts at the other team, the others playfully 'boo'ing and rolling their eyes.

Hana feels her face heat up in a simmering rage of jealousy and frustration, her eyes narrowing as she watches the two of you, the flirty undertones, his winks every time you score, the bashful smiles all starting to grate at her.

"Not fair, ___'s good! I want her on our team," Hana calls out, clearly up to something.

"But-" Jimin is about to protest but she's already made up her mind.

"___, why don't you swap with Hobi for the rest of the game."

"Wha- hey! I thought I was good," Hoseok laughs.

Hana's tone is just a little too sweet. You can feel the shift in her demeanour, and you know it's not just about the game anymore. You glance over at Jungkook, seeing the crease between his eyebrows, the tension in his jaw. It's clear that he is not happy.

"No way, ___'s our star player," Taehyung calls out, playfully nudging your arm, oblivious to the underlying tension.

Hana doesn't back down, her smile turning sly. "Oh whatever, don't be so greedy," she chides, her voice sickly sweet. "Come on, ___."

You don't want to reject her in front of everyone, so you offer her a weak smile, feeling put on the spot. "Sure," you mutter, reluctantly swapping places with Hoseok. You shoot Jungkook a confused look, his expression mirroring yours.

The game starts back up, but Jungkook is still suspicious of her intentions. He knows what she's like, and he can practically see the gears turning in her head.

The game goes on, everyone playing as normal, the vibes more or less okay, until they aren't. Jimin hits the ball in your direction and you run a few quick steps to reach it, when suddenly there's a foot blocking your way, sending you tumbling to the ground, your body landing in the sand, your ankle taking a bit of a beating.

"Oh shit, ___, I'm sorry," Hana gasps, the emotion in her voice not reaching her face. Everyone looks concerned, worried looks crossing their faces.

Jungkook reacts within seconds, sprinting over to you as soon as you hit the sand, his heart racing in his chest, his eyes wide with worry. He crouches down to check on you, his hands gentle as he inspects you for any injuries. "Are you okay? Does anything hurt?"

You look up at his face, seeing the genuine worry in his eyes. "My ankle hurts a bit but-"

Before you can get your sentence out, he's already checking your ankle, looking like a first aider who desperately wants a raise.

"It's fine, really, it's nothing to worry about."

He looks into your eyes, his movements coming to a halt, his chest rising and falling from rushing over to you. He doesn't care that his friends are watching, he doesn't care that his feelings are as clear as day. All he cares about right now is you and your ankle.

"You're sure?"

You nod, slowly getting up. You take a step, but your ankle is tender, causing you to hiss and stumble. Jungkook reaches out to steady you, his hands holding onto your waist, his grip firm.

"___, I think you should rest your ankle, honey," Mai murmurs with a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah, maybe put some ice on it," Namjoon nods, looking concerned.

"I'm sorry. It was an accident," Hana pipes up, a faint, apologetic smile on her face. The apology is almost as fake as her nose.

Jungkook's eyes narrow when he looks over at her, his anger showing clearly on his face. A muscle in his jaw twitches as he bites back a response. As much as he wants to lash out at her for purposefully hurting you, he holds his tongue, not giving her the attention she wants.

"I'm gonna go take her back to the house to get some ice on her ankle," he says, his tone brokering no argument. "You all can continue playing." The rest of the group nods in agreement, their faces filled with sympathy and concern. Hana stays silent.

Your injury really isn't that serious for you to not be able to walk, just causing a little limp, but when Jungkook decides you need to be carried bridal style, you don't protest. You actually have to hold back a giggle when his arm muscles flex as he carries you, quickly composing yourself.

He cradles you against his chest as he takes you back to the house, his grip on you firm but gentle. Once you reach the house, he sets you down on the couch, propping up your ankle with a pillow. He disappears into the kitchen, returning moments later with an ice pack, which he gently applies to your ankle. He takes a seat on the edge of the couch, his eyes fixed on your face, studying your expression for any signs of pain or discomfort.

He notices the small hiss that escapes your lips, his gaze softening as he looks at you, his hand resting on the ice pack, keeping it in place. "Does it hurt?"

"It's just really cold," you chuckle, looking down at the ice pack.

"Cold is better than pain, right?"

"Yeah, cold is better than pain," you smile.

You feel him remove the ice pack, watching him inspect your ankle with so much care, so much tenderness. Seeing him run over as soon as you got hurt, having him take care of you like this...it's a glimpse of the care you haven't allowed yourself to indulge in for a long time.

"Thank you," you whisper as you look up into his eyes, your body language a bit more vulnerable.

His gaze is soft, his expression filled with a tenderness that matches his touch. "Of course."

There's a moment, just a brief one, where time seems to still, his eyes holding yours, the space between you feeling almost electrified with a quiet intimacy.

"You got over there pretty fast," you murmur softly.

"Of course, I was worried about you."

He leans in, his face inching closer to yours, his fingers gently brushing some of your hair out of your face before he cups your cheek in his palm. "I don't ever want to see you hurt...no matter how minor..."

"I'm okay," you whisper, a faint smile on your lips, your nose just barely brushing against his.

"How's the pain?"

"What pain?"

He rolls his eyes, a small huff of amusement leaving his lips. "I'm serious," he whispers, a hint of a smile on his face, his thumb stroking your cheek. "You're sure it's okay?"

"I'm sure." You voice is soft, and the kiss he presses to your lips is even softer, your mouths moving in sync. Your lips might not be able to say everything you're feeling, but the kiss sure does. It's a silent confession that he cares for you and you care for him, more deeply than either of you can put into words.

He pulls back ever so slightly, his forehead resting against yours, his eyes still closed after that kiss, but the sound of the guys returning from the beach is like a cold shower, both of you suddenly pulled back into reality, the moment between you interrupted.

He holds the ice pack firmly against your ankle but his eyes are on your face, trying to read your expression, trying to find even a hint of what you're thinking or feeling. His heart is racing, but he forces himself to appear calm, to mask the flurry of emotions he's going through.

The guys burst through the door, their voices loud and full of laughter, a stark contrast to the quiet and charged atmosphere between you and Jungkook. They're blissfully oblivious to what they've interrupted, their brains still on the beach. They all make sure to check if you're okay, the attention thankfully on your ankle and not on Jungkook's and your flushed cheeks and flustered faces.

It's around 7pm when you find yourself on the patio, curled up on one of the loveseats, listening to Mai and Jisoo discuss wedding preparations. The sun is halfway set along the horizon, casting pretty pink and orange hues across the sky.

Some of the others have already retired to their rooms, probably knocked out after eating the mountain of dumplings Yoongi made for dinner. You had contemplated speaking to Hana about what happened on the beach, but you ultimately decided against it. You know that her intention was to hurt you, but you're an adult and you refuse to indulge in her petty games.

"Are you stressed out? I know I was when I was getting married," Jisoo chuckles, taking a sip of her tea as she curls up one of the patio sofas.

"Big time," Mai sighs. "Don't get me wrong, I'm so excited to finally marry Joon, but wedding planning is a lot more stressful than I thought it would be."

You listen as Mai vents, going on about the caterers, and the venue, and the dress. You're a part of the conversation, but you shift in and out of being emotionally present. Your eyes drift off into the distance, staring out at the water with a distant look on your face, the pain in your ankle long forgotten.

"Joon and I even got into an argument last month because we went over budget...or, well, I went over budget," she scoffs.

"That's normal," Jisoo shrugs, giving her a reassuring smile. "Jin and I had a few arguments throughout the planning. I get it. As long as you don't let the stress come between you."

You might be here physically, but mentally, you've checked out. It's as if your thoughts have grown legs and ran off on their own, taunting you with Jisoo's words.

As long as you don't let the stress come between you.

Jisoo's words take you back to that time in your life, when you thought your life was perfect. It was perfect. You had the man of your dreams, a ring, and the promise of a long life together. Then you 'let the stress come between you'. At least that was Sunghoon's excuse for having sex with a friend of yours. He told you he was stressed out and the wedding planning just became too much for him, and you were always studying for your masters, never giving him the attention he deserved.

It's a strange thing, grieving. To grieve, not a person, but rather a bond that you spent years building with a person, is a feeling you can't quite explain. Grieving the loss of a relationship is not linear. The sadness and the anger come and go. Some days you're completely fine, laughing and going out, feeling like yourself again. Some days you're on your bedroom floor, crying as you clutch onto the wedding dress you never got the wear. You grieve Sunghoon, not because he died, but because that boy you fell for at sixteen no longer exists.

You envy Mai and Namjoon's relationship. It's clear how much they love each other, how much he loves her. It's clear how much he values and respects her, how his eyes don't prioritize anything that isn't her, how kind and gentle he is with her. It's a reminder of the love you once had. The love that was crumpled up and thrown in your face on a random Tuesday evening.

You have to excuse yourself when the feeling starts to get a bit too much, all this wedding-talk making your eyes sting. You go down to the beach, the sand feeling rough beneath your feet, the air much colder now that the sun is fully set. You sit down with your knees held to your chest, your eyes looking out at the water, the waves crashing loudly. It's what your brain sounds like. So, so loud. It's overwhelming and the lump in your throat is starting to hurt.

Then there's a voice behind you and it's like everything goes still, your thoughts finally quieting down.

"There you are," he murmurs, his voice soft and gentle, the sound enough to warm you up in the cold breeze. "Mai and Jisoo said you were out here."

You don't respond, your heart feeling a little lighter when he sits down next to you, his eyes trailing from the water to your face.

"Why are you out here alone, hm?"

"Just...needed some air."

"There's air in the house too, you know."

A faint smile flashes across your face before it fades, your eyes trained straight ahead of you. "It's better to think out here."

"I suppose that's true."

He looks over at you, sensing the sadness in your eyes, in your demeanour. He doesn't know what it is, but he wants to protect you from it. It might be greedy of him, but he wants to pick apart your brain and understand exactly what it is that's burdening you. He wants to know your past, your fears, your regrets. He doesn't want to push, but he wants to be let in.

"___, what's making you so sad?"

You scoff humourlessly. "What makes you think I'm sad?"

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Don't hide from me," he murmurs, looking at you with so much tenderness. "I can't force you to tell me what's bothering you...but I know it's not nothing."

"You think you've got me all figured out, huh?"

"Maybe."

He doesn't even know the half of it.

You stay silent, chewing on your bottom lip. You can't lie to him, and that kinda scares you. It scares you that you feel so strongly for him, strong enough to want to completely bare your soul for him.

"Listening to Mai and Jisoo talk about the wedding...it reminded me of..."

He doesn't rush you. He lets you take your time, holding his breath as he waits, sensing you want to open up about whatever it is that's weighing so heavily on your shoulders.

"It reminded me of a love I lost years ago..."

He isn't sure exactly what he feels. A part of him is relieved that you're finally letting him in, finally showing him this vulnerability. It's all he's ever wanted, yet the thought of a man hurting you, a man who once had the privilege of loving you (the privilege he so desperately longs for) and still throwing that away...it makes his head spin. This is the first time he's heard of you being with anyone in the past, and it reminds him of how little you've actually shared with him about yourself and your past.

"Do you...want to tell me about it?" He keeps his voice low, not wanting to speak too loudly in fear of scaring you away.

You take a deep breath before speaking.

"He was my first love...we met in high school. We were together for...a long time," you murmur, looking down at a vague spot in the sand. "And he cheated on me."

You don't tell him everything, just enough for him to get an understanding without sharing too much.

Your confession almost knocks the air out of his lungs, his brows furrowing, his eyes growing wide. He's angry. He's furious at the man who dared to betray you like that, he's confused why anyone would do something like that to a woman like you. He's sad, so terribly sad that you had to go through that. He can't imagine what that must have felt like, the pain you must have gone through. It pains him to think about you ever being hurt like that.

"___, I'm so sorry," he whispers, slowly inching closer to you.

"Don't be," you murmur, the faint smile on your lips not quite reaching your eyes. "It was a long time ago."

"That doesn't change the fact that it was wrong. ___, you deserve...everything. You deserve someone who wakes up everyday and feels blessed to have you, who would go to the ends of the earth for you..."

There's a pause, the air feeling thick.

"You deserve a man who loves you with all his heart."

His words fade into a quiet whisper, as if he's just bared his deepest secrets. He looks at the side of your face, his heart pounding in his chest.

"___," he whispers, practically begging you to look at him.

Your gaze meets his, your eyes shining with a thin sheen of unshed tears. His words hold so much feeling, so much desperation.

"Yes?" It's almost too soft to reach his ears, your voice trembling.

He leans in, his face inching closer, his fingers gently brushing your hair behind your ear.

"If you were mine...really mine..." He takes a sharp inhale through his nose, his eyes boring into yours. "I'd never break your heart."

It's like a dam breaks.

You close the gap between you, pressing your lips to his, your eyes squeezing shut, a tear finally rolling down your cheek, quickly being brushed away by his thumb. You crawl into his lap, the kiss growing passionate, your fingers sliding up into his hair, gripping onto his strands to steady yourself. You feel everything and nothing and all that is in between.

You love him. You really do, and it took you four years of knowing him to admit it to yourself. It's scary and it's uncertain, but it's love and it's real and you can't keep running from it.

It makes you shiver, the overwhelming feeling mixed with the cold evening air.

"Are you cold?" He asks, pulling away to look into your eyes, his thumbs gently stroking your cheeks.

"A little."

"Why don't we get you in a nice warm shower?"

You know what his suggestion implies, and you can't deny yourself of the pleasures of loving him and letting him love you.

"Okay."

You get up and make your way back to the house. It's completely still, everyone else already in their rooms. Jungkook leads you to your room and shuts the door, locking it for good measure. He looks over at you, the two of you silently communicating that you want this. He crosses the room and takes your face in his hands, crashing his lips into yours.

You walk backwards to the en-suite, pulling away only for him to open the shower door and turn the water on, the hot water slowly filling the room with steam. He turns back to you, searching your eyes for any hesitation.

"Are you coming in with me?" Your voice gives away your desires, your eyes begging him to give you what you want.

"Do you want me to?"

"I do," you murmur, leaning in to press a few quick pecks to his lips. You pull away and hold your arms up, a faint smile playing on your lips.

He gets the hint and reaches for the hem of your top, slowly pulling it up over your head, with big smiles spread across both of your faces. He reaches behind you to undo your bra, slowly sliding the material down your shoulders, letting it fall to the ground as he presses soft kisses to your collarbones. He kisses down your body until he is kneeling before you, his eyes trailing up to your face. "God, you're gorgeous," he mutters softly, hooking his fingers into the sides of your pants, pulling the fabric down your legs.

He presses a gentle peck to your lower stomach beneath your belly button, sending a shiver down your spine. He slowly pulls your panties down, tossing it aside with the rest of your clothes.

He stands up straight and smiles as you start undressing him, pulling his shirt over his head before moving onto his pants and boxers, letting the clothing pool at his feet.

He presses his lips to yours and leads you into the shower, the warm water cascading down your bodies. You wrap your arms around his neck, playing with the wet hair at the base of his neck. "I thought we were waiting until we got home," he whispers, a smile tugging at his lips.

"I'm tired of waiting," you whisper, moaning as he kisses down your neck.

His hands slide over your body, the water making everything slick, his fingers tracing along your curves. He pulls your body against his, his mouth moving up your neck to your ear, where he takes your earlobe into his mouth. "I'm gonna make you feel so good...gonna make you forget all about that other asshole."

He gently presses you up against the shower wall, kissing a line down the side of your neck. He holds onto your waist to steady you while his other hand finds its way between your legs, running his middle finger through your folds.

"So wet, baby," he mumbles into your neck, his voice a low rumble.

He gathers some of your slick on his fingers and starts rubbing slow circles over your clit. You moan softly and tilt your head back against the wall, your fingers gripping his biceps. He makes sure you're wet enough before sliding a finger into your pussy, slowly thrusting it in and out.

"F-fuck," you moan, your eyes fluttering shut.

"That feel good, baby?"

You nod.

"Want another?"

"Mhmm," you sigh blissfully, feeling him insert a second finger, his lips and tongue attached to your neck.

He groans at the sound of your slick, his fingers moving in a 'come here' motion, pulling soft moans and sighs from your lips. "You like that?" he mumbles, his voice a little deeper, his breathing a little ragged.

"Y-yeah," you manage to breathe out, your eyes squeezing shut and your eyebrows furrowing as the pleasure builds. Your nails dig into his biceps when his fingers pick up the pace, the knot in your stomach starting to tighten.

"Gonna...c-cum..."

He smiles against your neck as starts rubbing circles over your clit with his thumb, his middle and ring finger moving faster. "Cum for me, baby."

Your muscles tense up as the knot unravels, your orgasm washing over you with a loud moan. He slows his fingers, helping you through it by easing the pressure on your clit. "You did so good for me," he whispers, pressing a kiss to your lips, his tongue licking into your mouth.

You hand trails down his abdomen until it reaches its destination, wrapping your fingers around his semi-hard cock. He moans into the kiss, slipping his fingers out of your pussy to grip your hips, needing something to ground him while you stroke his cock.

"Wanna make you feel good," you whisper into the kiss, trailing your lips down his chin and neck, moving lower until you're down on your knees in front of him.

He looks down at you with his bottom lip caught between his teeth, his stomach muscles tensing in anticipation. He slides his fingers through your wet hair, resting his free hand against the wall. He watches as you part your lips, his cock twitching in excitement.

"Gonna take it like a good girl?"

You nod up at him before pressing a teasing kiss to the tip, listening to the soft moan that falls from his lips. You start stroking the shaft, batting your eyelashes up at him.

"Fuck, that feels good," he sighs, taking hold of your chin, pushing his thumb into your mouth. He groans as you swirl your tongue around it, the way you would with his cock.

You suck on his thumb, making sure to hold eye contact while you stroke his cock, the tip already starting to leak a bit of pre-cum. Once you get him fully hard, you release his thumb from your mouth and replace it with his cock, feeling the delicious weight on your tongue.

He watches as you start sucking him, focusing your tongue on the head before taking him all the way to the back of your throat, pulling a deep groan from his throat. He fists his hand in your hair, letting out shaky breaths as the pleasure flows through him. You're a sight to see, with wet hair and a mouth full of cock.

He can't decide if he wants to cum down your throat or fuck you against the wall. He likes the sound of the latter.

"Baby...b-baby, stop," he mutters breathlessly, tugging at your hair to get you to release him from your mouth.

"What's wrong?"

"I need to be inside you," he breathes, helping you up before he slides his hands to the back of your thighs, lifting you up in one swift motion. "Need this pussy," he mutters, pressing you against the wall to grind his cock against your sopping folds.

You wrap your arms around his neck, moaning as he grinds into you, welcoming his lips against yours. He reaches down to align his cock with your entrance, slowly pushing into you with a guttural moan.

"F-fucking Christ, you feel so good," he groans, his fingers digging into your thighs as he starts thrusting into you, his cock filling you up like nothing and no one else can.

Having him inside you is something you'll never get tired of, his cock fitting in you like you were moulded just for him. You were made for him, and he was made for you. His thrusts make your head spin, the steam coming from the shower making everything feel more romantic, more intense.

"You're perfect," he sighs, his voice almost too quiet to hear if it weren't for the fact that his words are whispered directly into your ear. "So...so beautiful..."

All you can do in return is moan and whimper as his thrusts get deeper, the pleasure getting stronger. You lose all ability to form a coherent sentence, your eyes squeezing shut as he pounds into you. He slides his tongue into your mouth, gently digging his teeth into your bottom lip, giving it a little tug.

His thrusts start getting faster, sloppier, an indication of his impending high. Your own orgasm starts creeping closer, his cock hitting that special spot inside you that makes you turn to mush. "Oh my God, don't stop...so...so close..."

"Me too, baby...gonna cum s-so hard..."

He thrusts harder, hitting that same spot over and over again, his nails digging into your flesh. The coil in your stomach tightens, threatening to snap with each deep thrust. The air is thick with passion and desire, your body trembling in his hold, your moans bouncing off the wet bathroom walls.

"Fuck, I'm gonna cum," he groans deeply, holding onto your thigh while his free arm wraps around your waist, holding onto you like you're his oxygen supply. "Oh f-fuck, ___!"

A few sloppy thrusts and your walls start spasming around his cock, triggering his orgasm. He paints your walls with thick white ropes of pleasure, his arms clutching your body like you might disappear into thin air.

"Holy sh-shit," he sighs, both of you slowly coming down from your high, giving you a few slow thrusts before pulling out, letting his cum leak out of you.

You're completely spent, smiling like a giddy schoolgirl, your cheeks flushed, your heart hammering in your chest. The warm water runs over your bodies, slowly bringing your brain back down to earth. "Let's just stay like this for a little while," you whisper, cupping his cheeks in your hands before pressing a light kiss to his swollen lips.

"Okay," he smiles, pressing soft pecks over your cheeks, your nose, your chin. He brushes some of your wet hair out of your face, looking at you like you hung the stars in his sky.

He slowly puts you down and reaches for your body wash, lathering some on your loofah. You're about to take it from him but he stops you. "Let me."

You look up into his eyes, seeing how much this means to him. Sex is one thing, but what you do after says everything. He doesn't just want the sex, and neither do you. He doesn't want this moment to end here, and neither do you, so you let him lather your body in the fragrant body wash because this is about so much more than sex.

He washes you with so much care, making sure the soap reaches every inch of your body. The last man you let wash you after sex was Sunghoon, but with Jungkook it somehow feels different. His hands are softer, he touches you more gently, and his gaze travels down your body like you're a work of art and he is lucky enough to get to lay his eyes upon you. It's difficult to just forget about the past and the heartbreak, but in this moment with Jungkook, you want to try to take the steps to move forward.

You rinse yourself off under the hot stream of water before taking his loofah from the shower hook and lathering it with your body wash, returning the favour. You run the soapy loofah over his body, running your free hand over his muscles, a soft smile settling onto both of your faces. You run your hand over his chest, feeling his heartbeat beneath the firm flesh. You lean in and press a soft kiss to the area, kissing all the way up to his lips.

The two of you stay like that for a while, just kissing under the warm water, the steam surrounding your bodies, partially blurring your vision. This level of intimacy feels so different and new to the two of you, and yet it feels so right, like you were always meant to be with him like this, like you were born to be loved by him.

You love him, and it feels like too big of a mouthful to say in this moment, too heavy on your tongue, too frightening for your brain to comprehend, so you keep it stored away for the time being. Admitting it to yourself is enough for now.

You stand kissing under the water until it starts turning cold, so you turn it off and step out. He dries you off with a fresh towel before moving onto himself, letting you dry his hair with your hairdryer. The two of you get ready for bed together, which again, is new for you. You stand next to him and brush your teeth, stealing glances at him in the mirror every chance you get.

You change into a t-shirt and panties and slip into bed with him, facing him while he languidly rubs your back beneath your shirt, his body bare except for a fresh pair of boxers. He smells like your body wash, like his skin has been stained by you.

"___, about what I said on the beach," he murmurs, chewing on his bottom lip.

"What about it?" you ask nervously, seeking his eyes for any sign that he regrets it.

"I meant every word I said," he whispers, leaning in to nudge his nose against yours.

"I know, Jungkook," you murmur, your voice barely reaching his ears before your lips seek out his in the dark room.

He kisses you until you're too sleepy to kiss back anymore, and when you fall asleep in his arms without protesting, your face reflecting how peaceful you feel, he finally rests. He knows what you're too afraid to say out loud, and he doesn't need to hear it from your lips to know that it's real.

He will continue to love you in silence until you're ready to be loved out loud.

The next morning, you wake up to sound of the waves crashing, the birds chirping, and the feeling of the sun on your face and Jungkook's lips on your cheek. You have to admit it's a damn good way to wake up.

"Morning," he mumbles, his voice still laced with sleep, the deep rumble going straight through your body. You've never had a thing for the 'morning voice' guys tend to exaggerate to sound sexy, but damn. He could read your grocery list after waking up and you'd get down on your knees for him.

"Morning," you smile, your eyes still feeling too heavy to open fully.

"How'd you sleep?"

"Really good," you murmur softly, holding the side of his jaw in the palm of your hand, feeling his warm skin. "You?"

"I slept amazing last night," he grins, his hand slowly sliding down your thigh to hook it over his hip, letting you feel his bulge.

At that, your eyes open, letting out a sleepy chuckle. "Someone's up early," you tease. "Is 'little Jungkook' excited to see me?"

"Don't call him little, it'll hurt his feelings," he groans, pressing his face into your neck as he rolls you onto your back, laying his weight on you. He presses a few lazy kisses to your neck, slowly grinding his hips into you. "He's big and manly."

"Oh, I'm sorry," you murmur, sighing as the head of his cock rubs over your clit through the thin fabric of your underwear. You loosely wrap your arms around his neck, letting your eyes flutter shut once more. "Maybe his lady friend can apologize for me."

"Yeah? Is she awake?"

"Mm...she's definitely awake."

"I should get her ready first," he whispers, pressing a final kiss to your neck before pulling away to pull your t-shirt over your head, tossing it aside.

"She's a little lower down, you know," you chuckle, biting your bottom lip as he starts kissing your breasts, enveloping a nipple in his warm, wet mouth.

"I know," he mumbles with your nipple in his mouth, giving it a suck and a little nibble before switching to the other side. "I just wanted to give my girls some attention too."

"Your...your girls?" You sigh in pleasure as he sucks on your nipple, running your fingers through his messy hair.

"Mm...my precious babies," he smiles, planting a kiss to your sternum before making his descent down your body, his head disappearing under the duvet.

He spreads your thighs to accommodate his shoulders, not bothering to remove your panties. He simply pulls them aside and starts pressing soft, feather-like kisses to your clit. He knows you're still sleepy, and he is too, so he takes his time, languidly licking and sucking on your clit before sliding his tongue through your slick folds, gathering some of your essence on his tongue.

"Fuck, you taste good in the morning." His voice is muffled against your pussy, the duvet drowning most of the sound, but it reaches your ears and it makes your walls clench.

He flicks and swirls his tongue around your clit, pulling moan after moan from your lips, your back arching off the mattress as he eats you out. You're not sure why, but cunnilingus feels even better when you're sleepy.

Soon enough, you're cumming on his tongue, lacking the energy to last any longer than necessary.

He crawls up to stick his head out from under the duvet, his tongue darting out to lick your slick off of his lips. "Love the taste of your pussy in the morning."

"Jesus Christ," you laugh, your cheeks still flushed from your orgasm and his filthy words. "Do you have to be so vulgar?"

"I absolutely have to be so vulgar, yes."

He kisses you, letting you taste yourself on his tongue. It's early and neither one of you have gotten up yet to brush your teeth, but you don't care. You kinda like the way he tastes in the morning. It's natural, it's unfiltered and, you dare say; romantic. It makes your body heat up at the thought alone.

Morning sex is always a treat, a rarity for you and him. It's slower, and softer, and you don't have to think too much because your body just does what feels good. When Jungkook pushes his cock into you and presses his lips to yours to swallow your moans, you feel like you're on cloud nine.

"You're so pretty," he whispers into your ear, his voice deep and low, his hands sliding into yours to intertwine your fingers next to your head.

"You too," you sigh, your eyes rolling back into your head as he thrusts, making sure to roll his hips slowly and deeply.

"You think I'm pretty?" he grins faintly, keeping the pace nice and languid.

"S-so pretty..."

Your words pull a soft groan from within his chest, his face smooshed against your neck.

It doesn't feel like he's fucking you, but rather making love. There's no rush, the house still completely quiet in the early hours of the morning, giving him over enough time to pleasure you. The sun shines through the window, heating the skin of his bare back. His hair stands up in all directions from sleep, making him look extra soft and fluffy. He's so much more than pretty when you open your eyes to look at him. He's magnificent.

He kisses your lips as his thrusts pick up momentum, his body chasing his high. He reaches a hand down to rub circles over your clit, wanting you to finish with him, and as good as you feel, and as close as you are to cumming, you don't even care about that right now. All you care about is getting to share this intimacy with him.

He presses your body into the mattress when he cums, his arms wrapping firmly around your waist, his cock throbbing inside you.

You slide your hands around him, rubbing the skin of his back to soothe him, feeling the way his muscles flex beneath your palms.

His chest rises and falls unevenly, his whole body trembling, the feeling of pure bliss coursing through his veins. "Damn," he mumbles, his voice rough from his ragged breaths. "I might have just ejaculated my soul out of my body."

"That good?"

"So good," he chuckles, still a little breathless. "Wanna go take a shower?"

"Together?"

He leans on his elbows, looking down at you with a sheepish smile. "Yeah. Together."

You smile and push his frazzled hair out of his face, feeling your heart start to beat faster. "Okay."

The two of you take that shower together, sneaking in a few soft kisses and slow touches, trying your best not to get carried away. You kiss while you dry yourselves off and get dressed, and you kiss after brushing your teeth, and then before leaving your room to have breakfast with the rest of his friends, making sure to get in as many kisses before you have to be his "friend" again.

A part of you is sad to be leaving Jeju, but it's not the beach or the house you'll miss, although both of those things were quite nice. Instead, you'll miss opening your eyes in the morning and turning your head to see him next to you. You know that once you get home, you won't have any excuse to wake up next to him except for the fact that you're in love with him and you want to spend your mornings, your afternoons and your nights with him. That would just be insane to tell him that, so you won't, yet it's all you can think about on the plane ride back to Seoul.

He drives you home from the airport and carries your suitcase up to your apartment, handing it back to you at the door. You open the front door and walk in, expecting him to join you, but he doesn't.

"You coming in?"

"I want to but I should really get home to Bam," he sighs, giving you an apologetic smile.

That shouldn't disappoint you as much as it does. You understand, you love Bam and you know he needs his dad, even if you need his dad too.

"Right...yeah...I have to go get Miso from Jihyo's place anyway, so..."

He watches you as you try to hide your disappointment, an amused smile spreading across his face.

"Don't pout, baby," he teases.

"I'm not pouting," you scoff, rolling your eyes. "You should go, Bam-ie's waiting for you."

"Okay," he smiles, not making a move to leave just yet. "Can I get a kiss?"

"I don't know, can you?"

He scoffs and steps forward, cupping your face and pressing a few quick kisses to your mouth. "Before I leave," he murmurs against your lips. "I have a question I've been meaning to ask you."

"What is it?"

"Will you be my date to Joon and Mai's wedding?"

Your disappointment is replaced with surprise and an overwhelming heat that starts to spread throughout your chest, bringing a flush to your cheeks.

"O-okay," you murmur shyly, feeling your heart rate pick up.

"Yeah? Gonna wear a pretty dress for me?"

His smile and his words almost turn your knees to jello, but you manage to keep yourself composed, at least on the outside.

"Yeah."

"You gonna let me take the pretty dress off afterwards?"

"Yeah," you whisper, smiling as he presses another lingering kiss to your mouth, your hands holding onto his shirt to steady yourself.

"Good. I'll see you later, yeah?" He nudges your nose with his, his smile not faltering as he pulls away, sliding his hand down your arm until it reaches your hand, giving it a little squeeze before slowly releasing it.

"Yeah...see you later," you smile, watching him walk down the hall.

He walks until he reaches the elevator, pressing the button and stepping inside. He turns around to look at you down the hall, blowing you a quick kiss as the doors close. You have to wait until the elevator is fully closed before you let out a squeal, feeling like you're sixteen again.

< Part 4 || Part 6 >

[avionvadion]

This Trey discourse is getting ridiculous.

Tell me you don’t understand the dream without telling you don’t understand the dream. Tell me you don’t like Trey or understand his character without telling me you don’t like Trey or understand his character. For starters, the reason most of the fandom disliked Trey early on- book one. He didn’t stand up to Riddle’s mother or stop Riddle from being a tyrant.

Argument one: he was a child. A ten year old child whose parents were being screamed at for five hours straight (something of which BOTH Idia and Leona are horrified by, and those two had some strict upbringings themselves) while listening to eight year old Riddle wailing and sobbing for his mother to stop. That shit is traumatizing. Have you ever been screamed at unjustly as a kid? It’s terrifying. It haunts you. That kind of memory latches on and never lets go. Not without help.

Argument two: Trey is 18. He is a big brother. Not a parent. He didn’t raise his little siblings either, as his parents have a seemingly good relationship with each other and their children. He hasn’t seen Riddle in years, and while excited to see Riddle at the entrance ceremony he was quickly rebuffed by the now cold and steely Riddle who grew up under his abusive mother’s rule. He and Cater then worked with Riddle to dethrone their horrible then-dorm leader, and Trey was then sacrificed to the position of vice dorm leader because the entire dorm took a vote. Still, he did his best as vice dorm leader- not wanting to lose his head or watch their dorm mates stumble accidentally onto the execution block.

Trey, at the start, wasn’t particularly close to Riddle because Riddle wouldn’t let him be, and as someone who was traumatized by what happened when he WAS A CHILD likely struggled to speak up against Riddle’s harsher rules, and that most likely muddled together with Trey’s wish for Riddle to be happy. Going against Riddle would lead to conflict, and Riddle is short tempered as is. Trey likely believed that standing up to Riddle would make things worse instead of better.

He learns quickly from Adeuce later in book one how wrong he was, but that’s beside the point. The best Trey could do in the position HE DID NOT WANT was to give advice to his dorm mates and attempt to be Riddle’s voice of reason, acting as the peacemaker and struggling to keep any situation from escalating.

Something of note here, that I find particularly fascinating, is that it’s been stated by several characters that Riddle’s reign, though tyrannical, was nowhere near as bad as the last dorm leader- who was chaos incarnate. That plays a part in why Trey and Cater both were so willing to go along with Riddle’s iron ruling, even though both knew he was going about being dorm leader the wrong way.

There was no controlling or manipulating of Riddle- despite what Leona and Idia, who have ZERO CONNECTION AND INTERACTION with Trey and Cater prior to this dream, believed. There was no stopping Riddle, either. The best they could do was appease him and keep him calm.

Now, onto his dream.

We learn that Trey and his family “laugh” about what happened with Mrs. Rosebitch. This isn’t an, “oh they weren’t affected by what happened” situation, it’s an, “oh they were so badly affected by what happened that they can’t even talk about it properly because it’s so fucked up that they just laugh instead”. That’s called a trauma response. That trauma is so deeply rooted in Trey because he’s never learned to process it, that it’s there in his dream instead of being omitted.

Trey is also dreaming of a world in which Riddle has no stressful responsibilities. They’re at school, but his mother can’t reach him there, and Chen’ya- a childhood friend of Trey’s who was THERE when the Clover family got screamed at by Mrs. Rosebitch- is dorm leader instead. Riddle is not held down by what happened, and is seemingly “freed” from his mother’s cruel hand. Heartslabyul has become a safe space.

One built by Trey and Chen’ya, something they had unknowingly tried to do as children for Riddle (as they were unaware of the abuse, but had been a shining light for sweet baby Riddle who lived in the suffocating darkness) but failed- and paid severely for it.

Now, onto Fandom problem number two: the Round Bois.

I’m seeing people call Trey a “feeder” and are behaving harshly towards him because of it. But that literally couldn’t be farther from what’s happening. For example, let us take a look at his conversation with Vil (I brought my freaking receipts; this boy is my FAV of Heartslabyul) during Vil’s lab coat vignette.

We know Trey likes to bake.

He bakes for the Heartslabyul parties, and often gives Adeuce pastries to bring to Ramshackle to share with Yuu. But we learn in his New Years vignette that he bakes as a form of stress relief, too, to work his thoughts out and/or distract himself. It is a comfort to him. A safe space. And he knows whatever makes he will likely bring a smile to someone’s face. He enjoys baking, and he enjoys seeing people enjoy his sweets.

If someone is stressed, he encourages them to eat sweets- or cake with lots fruits, though that’s specific in this vignette because he just made a strawberry cake and was trying to find someone to give it to because it was one cake too many, lol, and Vil happened to be stressed out from something Rook said.

Trey isn’t being a “feeder” here or in his dream. He saw someone stressed and went, “Hey, I have a solution, why not try it? One slice won’t hurt and it’ll make you feel better/put you in a better mood.”

Baking is Trey’s solution, and a reliable source of comfort. He likes seeing how happy people are from the things he bakes, and he knows eating sweets can make other people happy. That’s why he goes out of his way to find someone to give the extra cake he accidentally made to- because it’ll put that person in a good mood and the cake will have a “good home” to go to.

Trey’s dream was basically giving Riddle and their other dorm mates a life where they could be happy and enjoy themselves without fear. A safe space. He could bake to his heart’s content in this massive kitchen his dream Heartslabyul provided, and everyone around him are happy and overall stress-free.

The reason they’re all ROUND BOIS???

It’s not because Trey was a “feeder” and fed them to that point, it’s because the dream-versions of his friends lacked self control and there was no one to stop them from eating sweet after sweet after sweet. They just happily ate whatever it was Trey baked, because he baked a lot- not to “feed” them, but because baking is something he greatly enjoys doing.

[txttletale]

What would you say are the three best introductory ttrpgs? Not in order of quality, but like if you had to pick three games as a good collective foundation before someone explores other ttrpgs.

obviously this varies table to table and person to person, right, some people aren't going to gel with certain aesthetics or settings or tones or themes. but in terms of speaking pure mechanics, i think the world would be a much better place if more people were introduced to trrpgs via pbta (esp. thinking like, '3rd gen', post-monsterhearts stuff here) -- not because i think pbta games are without flaws or even, as a rule, 'good', but because i think that GM Moves are an absolute cosmic sea change in terms of allowing the GM/facilitator role to actually fucking play the game and a powerful antitode to the imo extrmeely corrosive attitude that 5e play culture instills towards that role.

other than that i don't have particularly strong ideas about what's a good 'beginner game', because i think that depends a lot on factors like the players' genre familiarity or previous experience with non-ttrpg roleplay. like, lancer could be an incredible starter game if you want to get your 40k group with no roleplaying experience into ttrpgs, and honey heist might work great with your improv buddies who don't do tabletop games -- but swap those around and you could have pretty awful starter experiences!

so yeah tldr it varies from group to group but i truly think that any game that provides robust narrative as well as mechanical support for the GM role, or splits that creative element around the table (including fully GMless games) is going to be a much better starter game than 5e.

[edwin-paynes-bowtie]

Charles Rowland definitely is into Pokémon. I'm 1000% sure he has a Red or Blue cartridge somewhere in the Bag of Tricks that he sometimes whips out alongside a vintage Game Boy during his down time.

One day, Edwin asks him what he's playing. Charles is SUPER happy to show him Pokémon and, without thinking, overrides his save file so Edwin can make one. (He can regret it later; he never does. After all, it was for Edwin.)

Edwin is absolutely fucking LOST at the beginning of the game. He does not know how the console works, and the buttons are frustrating. But the pixilated graphics are interesting, and the game is emitting sounds that are most intriguing.

Charles has always been a fire starter guy. He LOVES Charizard, his second favourite Pokémon after Gengar. But after looking at each of the starters, Edwin finds himself most intrigued by Bulbasaur and picks him up.

Charles goes HAYWIRE when Edwin beats Brock on the first try. "Mate, even I've never done that," he says.

"Charles," Edwin admonishes, "do not be silly. Your flame salamander is simply ineffective against rock."

Charles is floored. When did Edwin have time to figure out type matching?

Edwin simply continues, "the laws of physics seem to work in this universe. As such, we can assume that grass and water might be strong against rock, as grass covers rock and water erodes it." He smiles fondly. "I cannot believe you did not consider that, Charles. Nearly four years of detective work and you did not realize that this game abided by worldly rules?"

Later, Edwin recounts this tale to Niko. Silently, she pulls a Pokémon handbook from her nightstand and opens it to a section about type-matching. Edwin wonders why Charles did not share that this is a Thing. Charles, meanwhile, is just in awe of the fact that Edwin essentially invented type matching of his own accord. Because Edwin is so bloody brills that of course he did

[iraprince]

That chart of your GW2 ocs has compelled me so much. what is gw2. how do you make gay plants in it

guild wars 2 is my favorite mmo of all time! it's free to play, tho if u ever do end up paying for the expacs/living world seasons and stuff they all have flat costs, no monthly subscription ever. (this is what i really like about it, bc games w subs stress me out... if something has a sub and i don't play every day i feel like i'm wasting money or something lol vs gw i can fall off the wagon for weeks/months and no harm done)

ANYWAY our gay plants are one of the playable races -- they're kind of gw2's version of elves, loosely, but they're called sylvari and imo they're much cooler. rather than being "born" they just Wake Up as fully formed adults from the pods of a magical tree and gain mmmmost (but not all) of their consciousness/general understanding of the world from a shared dream that contains the memories and life experience of the sylvari who have come before them, and at the beginning of the plot sylvari as a people have only existed for like. ~20 years, which i think is a really, really compelling hook. also i'm being serious and textual abt the gay thing, arguably the most central sylvari npc is a lesbian and her relationship w her ex is plot important, one of the starter missions u can choose as a sylvari centers around helping a gay couple and the dialogue is Really Insistent abt not letting it be interpreted as "wow they're good friends!!" etc etc

there's also an Evil Faction of sylvari called the nightmare court who feel the dream is overly controlling/sanitized and want to "liberate" sylvari by balancing out the experiences contained in the dream w more negative and painful ones instead -- in-game more often than not they're written pretty flatly as cackling puppy-kicking supervillains but i think they're really interesting lol, a huge chunk of my + marina's ocs are either current or ex nightmare courtiers (including merrit and glyndwr!)

okay wait wait wait im getting distracted and infodumping u can learn all this stuff yourself by getting into the game. gotta rein it in. uhhh let me leave u w screencaps of a bunch of our ocs so u can see some character creation options bc they're so cool

also hey furries: fuicking excellent beast race with close to no sexual dimorphism.

(the one on the left in this pic is an m model and on the right is the f model. the main difference between charr gender models, literally, is how fluffy their tails are. charr fucking rule)

[vamph00n]

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆mdni!!⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆

tags: celebhoon!!xmakeupartistreader!! fem reader, morally grey hoon, sunoo cameo. nsfw

wc: 6k

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆ synopsis: in which page one of the terms and conditions of your contract explicitly states that having physical relations with anyone in the workplace will result in an immediate suspension. that being said, you wonder how long it’ll be till you're fired. well maybe you’ll be exempted from that fate. considering it takes two to tango, and the other person in question is sunghoon. by technicality, you two didn’t exactly break the rules…yet.

⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆ taglist: @deobitifull @jakeswifez @d-dilemma

smut tags under the cut!!!

smut tags: dubcon, thigh riding, voyeurism, oral (m receiving), cum, spit, etc lmk if i missed anything.

nothing of what i wrote is meant to represent the real world, please consume what you can handle.

enjoy!

you've heard the woes of people who’ve worked at this specific entertainment agency. as to the reason why, you’ve been met with one hell of a contract for starters. in which the first rule of the terms and conditions explicitly states:

there will absolutely be no physical relations between anyone in the company.

you kind of figured it was a no brainer. working in this industry for a while it was an unspoken rule, but at this company? it was serious. anyone who fucked around didn’t stay long enough to truely understand the social repercussions and the forever stain it left on your reputation.

[redacted] entertainment made sure your future employers had the full rundown on your work behavior.

to you? it was doable. the amount of people you’ve seen come and go from this company was astounding. honestly that rule was the only one that got people fired in the first place, but nonetheless you were dead set on keeping this job.

one, because it paid well, and two; sunghoon.

…

“if you really consider it, they didn’t exactly break rule one,” your coworker conversed.

“yeah, they did,” you emphasized. “giving head is physical relations.”

both of you snickered at yourselves.

eating the food you packed for lunch, you play with that idea. so big deal, you can’t fuck said other employee; there are many ways you can have sexual relations with someone that doesn’t breach company policy. you’re sure that if you had made the decision to whore yourself out to whomever you choose, you’d be sneaky about it. as if you had anyone in mind.

well you do, it’s just…you’d rather put your work first.

“so who’s your ‘muse’ for the next hour” your coworker interrupts your thought process.

looking across the table to the bleach blonde boy whom you spent the majority of work and lunch breaks with, you sigh with contempt. if he didn’t have such a knack with a beauty blender, he’d be a model for the agency himself.

“park sunghoon”

the both of you scrunch your faces in displeasure. so damn difficult. sunoo shakes off that icky feeling, which earns him a faint smile from you. working with him is definitely what made this hell hole bearable.

ever since the well performing ad that prick starred in, it’s like his ego skyrocketed by ten fold. gone were the days he was solely booted to being a deodorant model, (in which you and sunoo had joked about having to conceal his dark underarms one day…)

the aversion seemed to go both ways. sunghoon the no-longer-antiperspirant-endorser, also seemed to have the same malcontent. but it was not exclusive to you two, he was just as equally uninterested to all staff.

well, maybe he was a bit mean to you and sunoo, because word got around about the little inside jokes you made.

“as much as i’d love to keep chatting, you have a date with the former ice prince of febreeze for your pits.” the blonde's laugh echoed.

you chuckle off sunoo’s comment, and brace for a painstakingly slow day.

…

in the midst of the many semi-harmless remarks you’ve made about sunghoon, guess you’ve forgotten to mention the fact that he is your favorite face to work on.

he’s stunning.

unzipping your kit, and setting out the products chosen after reviewing the theme of today's photoshoot, he arrives on the dot. the same icy gaze he seems to never take off lands on you for a few brief moments. you don’t know how long he’s been staring, because your eyes met his once you turned his direction. the manager trailing behind him with a clipboard in hand pulls sunghoon’s attention away, and you continue to set up your workstation. mentally taking note of your supplies:

curling iron, brushes, makeup, check.

gone are the days you actually greet your clients, because he just sits in the chair pulling out his phone. it doesn’t matter anymore because per contract rules, someone of his caliber is not to be talked to unless spoken to. maybe it would’ve been better if he stayed an antiperspirant endorser.

prepping his skin, you let the product sit. he looks bored. guess after a while of doing back to back photoshoots he’d be bored. what a luxury, to have other people do things for you at your hand.

there’s always been a clear divide between staff, and models. obviously. people in cosmetics were no strangers to this dynamic, neither were you. it’s maybe why when someone went from being a D-rate model, to being on the cover of multiple magazines; it puts a sour taste in your mouth.

sure, he was always bound to be on the screen advertising and you’d be working behind the camera. but for that brief moment of time when he was unknown, there was common ground between you two. just an unknown makeup artist and an unknown pretty face, joining the same company at the same time. both at the same starting point.

it sucks, because you could’ve known him, you could’ve been better than him.

there was always a tinge of jealousy.

envy, hurt, and abandonment. could you really feel that way because someone you never really knew? no. consulting yourself, and your thoughts at the time, maybe it’s because you felt you needed someone. feeling like you knew sunghoon is what gave you comfort.

it was stupid, and now you’ve diffused into the rest of the backstage staff. you make remarks about famous beautiful people, and they dehumanize you further as they get more starlight.

working the makeup sponge into his face, you watch him glance up a couple of times. a pang in your chest happens accordingly. trying to shut away the little bits of emotion you feel. you convince yourself it’s borderline creepy, how attached you feel to him yet he probably doesn’t even know you.

you go to set his base with powder, then it’s time to do his eyes. it’s been a while since you’ve had any connection to a person that isn’t just platonic. you think perhaps that’s why the fuzzy feelings you have about him bubble up. a reason you give yourself that doesn’t distract you from your mild distaste. it doesn’t help that you’ve also been going through a major dry spell.

the uncomfortable close nature this job fosters, makes it apparent.

the very charming drunk suitors at the bar are no longer, and your tinder had been long deactivated after seeing a family member pop up. there had been no action in your sex life for far too long, and it definitely got to you.

it’s pathetic. you know.

sunghoon’s manager leaves the room, only you and him remaining there. his eyes glance up at the door, then back to you. shit. the little butterflies in the pit of your stomach start flying around, as the little pitter patter of your heart beat increases. trying to break free of this feeling, you disregard the cardinal rule of not speaking unless spoken to.

“i need to do your eyes now.”

he nods, and closes them, putting his ear buds in. a wave of relief crashes onto you as you start to apply the eyeshadow on his lids. your face so close to his, you can hear his shallow breaths and he can hear yours.

“…sorry i’m so close, i can’t see well.” you mutter as you just try to gain composure.

at time like this is when you question if you’ve always been this easy to fluster.

after a long dragged out time spent working on the first eye, you moved to the second. it felt like time stopped, and you lost all ability to do makeup because it was taking you longer than usual. so many times you had to apologize to him for messing up, once you moved to his right eye he had anticipated another apology.

“sorry this is taking so long—“

“you talk too much.” he interrupts you.

reaching out his hand to pull you closer, in which you assume he was helping you get your job done more efficiently.

his eyes still closed, he reaches unintentionally for your hip, and grabs you onto his leg where you sat.

your body stiffens at the feeling, him seemingly okay with it. is he not saying anything to save himself from embarrassment? you don’t know. because now you are close, you can see better. so it did help, and you stay there, just continuing to do his makeup.

you subtlety shift back to see his face entirely, and feel the friction of his knee against your core.

this isn’t fucking happening.

shifting your weight forward again, feeling the sensation of your clothed cunt moving against his thigh you try to get this job done quickly and soon. it has appeared your lack of action has made quite you sensitive.

hoping to hell, and praying to god he doesn’t notice the growing desire bubbling within you, your shaky hand takes the makeup brush. a craft you’ve perfected, and you're finding it hard to keep your thoughts straight as you apply the base layer of his eyeshadow. as you take your time, you hear his shallow breaths turn into grunts of displeasure and impatience.

something that unintentionally turns you on.

holding your breath, you sigh. if he had noticed the discomfort brewing in your pants, you’d imagine the shock on his face. you anticipate what he’d do if he found out. something a little too risky to test.

sunghoon shifts in his seat, causing his knee to rub against your throbbing heat yet again. oh, it feels too good. can’t help but wonder how the mess you must’ve made.

in your head you’ve already convinced yourself that he has no clue what he is doing. you feel a little perverted, but it does ease your neglected cunt. you can only assume he has no idea the things he’s doing to you because his eyes are closed and his earbuds are in. you continue to try and do your job with a faulty hand.

or maybe he knows. the thought does cross your mind, how can it not? does this add to how utterly attractive you find him? yes. a lot actually.

then he adjusts himself again, causing his leg to bump against your sensitive heat.

oh.

this action earns a hushed moan from your throat, in which you are quick to cover your mouth. he doesn’t look up, and thank god. you're almost finished with his makeup, and so ready to go home after this.

your pussy twitches. it must be dripping right now, fuck.

drawing back your attention, you just have to clean up the look, add a couple of embellishments and you’re done. you can tell he’s still bored. that stupid feeling all your clients have when you do their makeup. you feel a weird sense of anger, and frustration at him. in your head keeping the villainized persona of him is easier, so you can just let go of this acquaintance you grew an attachment to. it also helps distract your mind from the wetness pooling. you do ponder… would he be so bored if you had mentioned how soaked your panties were?

as you are just about to finish up, you smudge it.

“fuck.” you say, as you look at the mistake.

“what’s wrong?” sunghoon mutters while opening his eyes. pausing ever so slightly, he takes a look at your face. the flushed color of your cheeks apparent. he doesn’t take note, at least he doesn’t make you aware that it is visible to him. instead he complains, obviously, and you instruct him to shut his eyes so you can end whatever hell of a wet dream this is.

and so you can forget how much this is turning you on.

as you correct your mistake, he starts to bounce his leg in a habit of boredom. you jolt and there is no way he’s not noticing this; wondering if he has caught on, or if he truly is as stoic as he seems.

you however, can’t make sense of it. nor is your endorphin filled brain actually paying attention to anything other than your pleasure.

if you were ever to recount this, which you know you won’t, you’d most definitely be an unreliable narrator.

your hips uncontrollably press into his thigh, warmth concentrates on the weak delicate parts of you and silently, you let the feeling of your climax engulf your lower body. writhing, the slight tinge of dizzy euphoria was fleeting, because you can’t believe you fucking got off.

it’s l surprising how good it felt, how your wet walls must’ve convulsed so deliciously around nothing. you can’t believe it was that good. embarrassment clouds your brain when you realize how bad you needed that.

you wonder if he notices your heavy breaths, if he’ll see the rise and fall of your chest. you wonder slightly… what he’d do if he had relized you came just now.

the thought is too hot for you to handle.

interrupting your silence, you hear the metal clank of the door knob and you come to your feet quickly. feeling the blood rush back to your head, you watch sunghoon’s manager walk in.

“i’ve finished.” you mumbled. you don’t know who you’re saying it to, the manager, sunghoon; or if you're simply just stating what you did all over your panties.

the man before you stands from the chair, adjusting his clothes, dusting off his lap. you can’t help but think that he knows, and he’s going to get you fired. he can’t, this job is quite literally your livelihood. he looks back to you, heading out the door, his eyes meeting yours. the brief flicker of his gaze on your reddened cheeks. of course he has the last word in a tone you can’t decipher.

“i can see that.”

…

the fluorescent lights of the store are migraine inducing. walking through the aisles searching for things to restock your hygiene products.

it’s been a couple of days, and the incident is still fresh your mind. you’d at least hope that by now it’d fade into the back of your head, but it just won’t. the loud generic pop playing over the speakers as you shop does nothing to drown your thoughts. and even when you’re home no amount of dissociating helps either.

but what the hell can you do?

on top of that, you’re still confused if sunghoon knew what happened.

there’s no way in hell he didn’t.

and like the world is plotting against you, one slight turn to the right you are greeted with the outdated deodorant ad of him. the bright lights the store had pointed to the display were obnoxious.

if he knew, he would’ve snitched. a pit in your stomach started to grow.

from that moment since you’ve been counting down the days, wondering when you’ll get the dreaded call into work. it’s torture, you can’t stand it. you’ve contemplated, maybe telling someone would lessen the weight. who would you tell? your therapist? sunoo? absolutely not.

moreover, how do you go about telling someone how much you enjoyed that?

your phone dings, an email. you hold the screen to you face, surprised at the contents.

…

being ordered to the company on your day off was something you didn’t expect, and if you were to be summoned to the building it should’ve been a pink slip. it was neither, instead you were being called to cover for someone last minute.

walking through the hallways of the establishment, it was empty. who could’ve been here on a day like this, you wouldn’t know, especially at this hour. the lights were only on in a couple of sections, many of the studio doors being locked. you assumed this job would probably be a quick one, whatever it might be.

2415, the number of the studio.

makeup kit in hand as you opened the door, you look up. the last person you wanted to see on the other side of it, sunghoon.

the door shuts behind your back, there’s no manager in sight, or crew, or anyone else. his eyes meeting yours, you swallow thickly. the dryness of your throat distracts you. is it hot in here?

his eyes meet yours in a trance. the corner of his mouth raises. this isn’t about makeup, or a photoshoot is it?

“you like me.” he says.

“huh?”

do you? you suppose... his expression is smug, irritating even.

he trails on, looking you up and down. you seem like someone who’s down for a good time. well, you’re someone who had a good time… one that very well could cost you your job. sunghoon knows that.

he feels the little pride in his chest rise, knowing he can easily persuade you. to do something fun, something different.

“do you wanna keep your job?”

…

sunghoon has a lot of things, money, noteriety, and looks.

he doesn’t have you.

honestly, who wouldn’t want the pretty little makeup artist who fell apart on his lap? yeah he knew. of course he fucking noticed. in that moment when you had lost yourself so innocently on his leg he couldn’t help but wonder just how touch starved you might’ve been. to get off simply at him shaking his leg? feeling your needy little pussy rub against against him? it was far too hot for him not to enjoy…

then again, he thinks back to why he singles you out of the dozen. he’s always sort of seen you as… competent, hard working, and unexpectedly…he found you quite interesting.

did the fact you were both briefed for your jobs at the same time help? maybe, and maybe if it weren’t for the stupid work policy he’d have fucked you already. while he wasn't exactly opposed to breaking the rules… he knew you were adamant about keeping your job.

did he practically hang the job above your head? yes, cause he could very well report you if he wanted. there’s no fun in that.

…

sunghoon’s hum rings in the empty studio. your nerves are still present. did you hear him correctly?

“i’m sorry are you—-“

he cuts you off and nods. how long would this take you to process? he’s fucking blackmailing you.

you stand there, still wondering what this could even entail. he’s made it clear, that’s not his intention to get you fired yet, but what is? your stomach forms a pit at the idea what he’ll make you do. you figure… maybe this is a late revenge for the many times you’ve made snarky comments about him, and you should’ve just let go of that in the past. you think how he’ll now commend you for your present day behavior towards him still, cause yes you still find the deodorant model jokes funny. now paired with the fact you know, that he knew you got off on his knee, there was nothing redeemable about your situation.

he steps forward,closing the space between the two of you. his hand grabbing at your chin, your pretty little face between his thumb and index finger. he knows youre not one to put your job on the line to fuck a coworker, even if your so utterly desperate.

so he’s not going to, not yet at least.

his hand releases from your small face, and he looks at you in your taut little shirt. he wonders if you know how enticing you look. do you know what you do to him? walking around the building looking like that all day. even if you have said some remarks about him, at least you're talking about him. that just clarifies that you think of him at the very least.

“i don’t want to get either of us fired.” is what he claims, but he will hang the job over your head if you don’t comply.

“but, i think you’re in a position that can’t say no to some fun.”

god, he must know how desperate you were. how touch starved you must’ve been for something real. it makes your head spin at the minor excitement that he just might do something.

he smirks at your compliance. “i want to get you off.”

clearing the table where you’d usually put your makeup kit, he pushes up against the counter kissing you in a ferocious manner. his lips so plump, it sends your brain into a daze.

this is physical relations. this will get you fired.

pushing his chest away from yours, he wipes the corners of his mouth. “we were just getting started. you chicken out or something?” he lets out an amused laugh rumble from his stomach. it’s something that makes you remember just how demanding he actually is.

“are you stupid? this is physical relations park!”

“if this goes any further we’ll both get fired.” the sound of the fold up chair scooting back as he sits down takes you away into thought.

you are most certainly sure that he does not give two shits about you right now, and that in the moment he really is trying to get you fired. why you felt his moral compass was that off center, it’s cause you’ve known him for long enough. that being said, the ways you’ve known him was purely how he treated you.

“relax, you didn’t think i was actually going to fuck you?”

that hurt, hurt like hell. it deflated the ego you were slowly starting to build, admittedly because you knew it would take a lot for sunghoon to actually throw his job away just for this. it did make you wonder why out of all people he chose you, but that was shut down quick when he just admitted he wasn’t gonna do anything.

“i recall that i said i wanted to get you off.” the stupid look on his face did nothing to diminish your want for his lips on your own.

sunghoon can see the curiosity, the sweet little pout on your face makes him all the happier to walk you through this. picking up your makeup bag from the floor, he rummaged through the pockets. makeup, sponges— and oh, what’s this?

as you sit on the table, it’s killing you that he’s not just doing as he said he would. does he get off on this? just the sheer fact that he might be making you break the rules? sunghoon is absolutely the type to. he grabs something from the bag in which you don’t catch in it’s entirety before he parts your legs.

“you can finger yourself right? no need for me to tell you how to do that.” his raspy voice bellows.

you nod, so utterly needy. your fingers slip under the fabric of your bottoms. he drinks in the sight as you ever so carefully rub the little bundle of nerves between your fingers. knowing that if you went any faster, this will be a quick session, so you take your time, just feeling how his eyes follow the clothed movement of your hands.

impatient, he takes them off for you. your bottoms. the clothe slides down your legs onto the floor, and god, you look tight. he slightly raises his shoulders, if you both weren’t in the company building right now he’d take you. alas he has to remind himself to hold back that urge. your glistening pussy in all its glory, just as pretty as sunghoon had imagined. it’s just as wet as he thought it would get.

just the way it tightens around nothing has his clothes dick feel the strain in his pants.

“bet your needy hole wishes it could feel this huh?” he rasps while palming over the very visible bulge.

he sits back in the chair, picking up the item and tossing it on the table beside you.

a curling wand.

“w-what do you want me to do with this?” the slight dread, and anticipation you had at his next few words made you just slightly whimper.

the action earns you a pleasured look on his face, and spreads his legs as if to show to you that this is indeed also getting him off.

“don’t be dumb, i want you to stick it in.”

your jaw slightly hangs open, that? that curling wand? you don’t think you’ve ever experienced something of that size, or girth. is he crazy?

the look of hesitation on your face confirms to him that you're unsure, but with a little encouragement he knows you’ll be a good girl.

“can’t take this huh?” he muttered, “that’s a shame.”

picking up the wand then running his tongue along the cold metal, before waving it back to your face.

“lube it up then babe.” his fanged smile submitting you so easily.

the phallic shape of the hair tool takes you back to when you’d fantasize about sticking other things up there to satisfy your needs. thank god you found out what vibratiors were before you got too desperate. although it would seem you’ve regressed, or simply just didn’t think about that in the moment.

spitting on it, and lathering the slick evenly across the wand you’re fucking terrified to say the least.

tou feel that must make sunghoon feel some sick pleasure derived front that.

angling it against your entrance you can already feel the tip being too girthy, like it’ll split you open.

sunghoon stands from his chair seeing your hesitance, and a wad of spit lands on the wand.

“if y’can’t get this in don’t know how you’ll be able to take me.”

oh he’s bluffing, but wait so he’ll fuck you eventually?

“wait so you’re going to—“

“not yet.” he raises his voice before landing back on the chair with his legs spread. “not in the company building no.”

unzipping and undoing the button on his pants, he folds over the sides so you can just barely see the dick print peaking through. your mouth almost salivates at the sight, and that makes sunghoon all the more eager to see your tiny cunt take that fucking hair curler. adjusting his posture he rolls down the elastic of his briefs to reveal that fucking christ—

he wasn’t lying.

watching you take in the sight of his cock, he slightly strokes it, making you eager for his touch and your own pleasure.

“gonna sit and stare? or you gonna fuck your pussy?”

silenced at his words, you push the tool into your depths, and sunghoon audibly moans as he watches every inch get sucked into you. he can only imagine what it would be like if that was him, and the little jolts of pain you displayed would be felt around his dick if he had just took you right then and there.

the stretch is insane, on one hand you can feel the bruises that will form within you, on the other hand you can feel how it hits the delicious spots of your inner walls. oh and the faces he makes as you take this monstrous size into you, it makes you imagine what his will feel like when he’s in balls deep, and what his face will look like.

the oh so pretty face you loved working on, and how it would contort into the same gorgeous expressions. watching his hands grip at his girth as you adjust to the size of the wand, you draw it out, then slam it back into yourself.

“fuck!”

you exclaim as your hand grips at the handle, starting to rhythmically thrust it in and out of your hole. it excites sunghoon all the more.

“looks like you still know how to please yourself huh?” his chest flattens as his hand moves faster, trying to match the same pace as you. it’s unbelievable how wet you’re getting. with each sloppy movement he can hear your melodic voice echo slightly in the room. each thrust drawing out a louder sound.

your back pressed up against the wall, your other hands goes to toy with your aching clit, causing a wave of sensations through your core. biting back a moan you know that would be too loud, the male across you pumps his dick even faster. it’s long, hard, so veiny and pretty. the reddened head of his tip oozing with precum, and his chest rising and falling.

he isn’t ashamed to show how much this does for him, he’s not the type. although, something about being able to see you clench makes him want to feel it. it makes him curse at himself for not just fucking you instead of acting none the wiser while you got off on his thigh. is this really how your cunt looks when taking cock? well, the substitute of one.

you’re just walking around freely with that? he’s been holding off for that?

his hands started to not feel enough, he needed a part of you to be on him so he could feel the relief of just having you to make it feel better. standing up, his erect member in hand, he holds it close to you.

“spit on it.” he almost begs.

who are you to say no?

a glob of your saliva drips onto his veiny need, and he feels it dribble down. still close to you, now near the sight that was merely a few inches away, he can really see how your hole just sucks in the wand. it’s dangerous how much he wants it.

taking the wand away from your hold, he helps you himself, fucking into you faster.

your body moves up with every shove, and he watches as you hold yourself up. the sight of your tits bouncing up and down, and the expressions he draws out make his dick twitch harder, his free hand stroking like his life depended on it.

“bet you take cock so good,” he hums before taking his free hand convered with precum placing it on the top of your stomach. as he impales your guts with the tool, the harmonious sounds from your mouth grow louder, your jaw hanging agape. he can feel how it bulges in your stomach, how you're slowly falling apart for him.

“sunghoon—“ you moan out feeling the pressure be too much, but it also feels too good to make it stop.

the sounds being elicited from your gooey and viscous slick are pornographic. he doesn’t think he’s seen anything quite as good, quite as real.

“look at how much there is, must feel so good huh?” he asks tauntingly.

“fuck, can’t imagine what it must feel like having your pussy wrapped around my dick like that.”

his dirty, dirty words almost make you wetter, if that’s even possible. still rubbing your clit, another wad of his spit lands there, his nod encouraging you to keep going.

his dick twitches at the sight, wanting to get you off faster so he can see what it must look like when you cum. his grip on the handle of the tool so strong, you can see the veins of his hand. fucking into you deeper and faster, all the sensations feel too much. the way it throbs for him, the way you’ve been feeling your peak build from the start, the never ending pleasure. this time it’s not as fleeting, this time your not fucking yourself against his thigh. this time he’s fucking you.

your cunt clenches so hardly around the tool, a familiar heat bubbling to the surface. this time, just stronger, and harder than anything you think you’ve ever experienced.

“sunghoon— i” your words are cut off as he pushes in you harder, and presses your stomach.

“yeah? let me see how your pretty little hole tightens all for me.” he almost growls hungrily.

you nod aggressively, feeling him so eager to get you off. he really wasn’t lying.

with another plunge into your swelling walls, you feel it. the waves of release engulf your whole core. you can feel it through your stomach, the delicate bundle of nerves, and in your vagina. you can feel the slick coat the tool more as you still try to come down from the high.

trying to slide out the curling wand you quickly urge him not to.

“fuck i’m still cumming.” you breathlessly exclaim, your whole body shaking from pleasure.

as sunghoon watched he bathes in how filthy you’ve made that metal rod, how much of that was only you. taking his neglected dick in hand, he hovers over the mess to quickly get himself off.

“what are you—“

he shuts you up, and pumps harder on his own cock, urging you to take some of that mess and lather it against his ache.

he’s so lewd, so open about it to you. there no shyness in sight, and he so wants to use the means that you can provide. it’s so hot, you can’t fathom how you’d ever be into anything like this. looking up at him, his face is desperate for relief, and you coat his dick with the slick you drenched the curling rod with.

you can feel how hot and heavy it is, the feeling of your supple fingertips on his length makes his body recoil from sensitivity. he wants to cum so fucking bad.

he doesn’t know when was the last time he was this eager to get off, maybe when he was a teenager he felt like this. it just seems you’re too intoxicating for him to handle. the texture of all your juices on his length make it hard for him to not bust so quickly, but he has to.

“shit, feels too good.” his voice rings as you just watch.

his thumb swirls at his sticky tip, and you’ve never wanted to put something in your mouth as much as you did now.

you hover over his cock, and lick your lips.

“hey— what the hell?!” sunghoon asks as you take it in your mouth. he’s immediately distracted from the bliss, and he feeling his fists and body clench at the sensation.

“shit, we’re breaking the rules right now—“

he didn’t think you’d really break.

you cut him off as the pop sound of your mouth makes his brain go fuzzy. “let me take it, i wanna taste you.” your saliva all stringy on his length makes it impossible to say no.

your tongue languidly laps at his dick, and you can barely take all of it in your mouth. the rest of the length being pumped by your hands. feeling how smooth he is, how he tastes, it’s so weird. so good. you want to revel in how great his cock is, massaging his neglected balls.

this earns a thrust into your mouth, and he can’t stand this any longer.

“baby, stay like that.” he moans while pumping the base of his cock into your mouth.

your tongue licks up the slit of his hard length, and swirls the tip. tasting his needy sap on your tastebuds, and watching his hips thrust forward. he’s dancing in the edge, trying to drag out the euphoric feeling.

“you’re so close.” your voice breathes out tiredly, just watching him in awe.

when he does, he’s loud. it’s so attractive, that you don’t mind how the hot white ropes spill onto your shirt. oh he came, a lot. there’s too much, so much.

pure bliss, his face contorts.

as he comes down, you can’t help but know that-

you both are now at a higher chance of losing your jobs.

[mymoshangthoughts]

aight so

moshang modern reincarnation au

so in their og life, things didnt go that different from pidw. obvs airplane's behavior was a lot different from og!qinghua, but he straight up just didnt know the key to survive as mobei jun's minion. basically, og!qinghua woulda prolly died even if he WAS a super great and loyal servant due to the circumstances. and airplane wasnt even a super great and loyal servant. without the foreknowledge that crossing mobei jun would be an absolutely fatal affair, he just did whatever he thought maximized his chances for survival. he had no reason to think that mobei jun would be a more dependable ally than an entire fucking sect, absolutely no reason to like mobei jun despite the frequent beatings, no reason to have a nuanced understanding or sympathy for demons, and no foreknowledge that there would be an upcoming war. he did sorta try to play both sides, kinda looking for who had the best thighs to cling to. he DID have a 'onesided' affection for mobei jun, but he also understood that his feelings were irrational, the violent demon clearly hated his guts, and even if he did have a chance there was no future for demon/human relationships. so he was too hyper logical to surrender himself to those feelings and never admitted to them

meanwhile mobei jun also did develop feelings for airplane, but he never found a way to express those feelings that airplane understood. to top it off, airplane being generally disloyal and duplicitous was a srs trigger for all his uncle issues (someone else who he'd loved so dearly and who had betrayed him at every turn)

so eventually it comes to mobei jun killing shang qinghua. they're both really fucking upset about it. airplane bc he'd like not to die, thank you, but also bc having the guy you like murder your ass is a special breed of heartbreak. mobei jun feels he has no choice, but after the deed is done, he's completely broken over it and is felled in battle not long after. it's debatable whether he was distracted by heartbreak or just no longer cared to protect his own life

SO reincarnation

modern times, the convenience of the internet, and demons are now a thing of myth. airplane doesnt have any memories of his past life persay, but he does have dreams and kinda faint memories, that he chalks up to his own overactive imagination. it seems like it'd make for a great story, so he starts jotting down stuff he remembers to use in a novel. the novel isnt really accurate to his memories, but a lot of the core events remain the same

mobei jun remembers but doesnt really believe it. his memories are a lot clearer than airplane's, but it still feels like remembering a dream. he's not even in denial, he's honestly never even considered the possibility that the incongruent memories are of a past life. it's too fantastical for starters, with demons and cultivators and all sorts of crazy nonsense, so even tho he can fairly clearly remember an entire other lifetime, he kinda just dismisses it and ignores it

especially because he hates remembering the end bits. the sharp pain of murdering a person he loved really fucks with him. but also he doesnt even really relate to the feelings of his past-life self. to him, a human who grew up with human rules and human logic, he has a "ofc the dude would hate you and backstab you, you're literally a domestic abuser???" type of reaction to a lot of the nonsensical demonic culture nonsense. due to the emotional disconnect of being unable to relate to his demonic past life, it's even harder for him to consider that person as himself. if he were really pressed to explain the events he remembered, he'd prolly assume "some dumb cartoon i watched as a kid maybe". the emotions are still sharp and painful, but he's filled with ridicule for his own past actions. also just generally "ya know, if you loved him, WHY MURDER HIM IDIOT??" bc mobei jun has no appreciation for tragic irony

anyway, one day mobei jun starts hearing about a new popular webnovel and he's not that much of a reader of this specific genre, but he starts hearing lil snippets that sound like his own memories and he's like "oh maybe this is the novel that im remembering" except when he looks it up, it's way too new for it to be that. so now mobei jun is thinking plagiarism and he's kinda hellbent to figure out which work this "airplane" asshole was plagiarizing but now he really can't find anything anywhere.

which doesnt make sense. he remembers a lot of the events within this novel SO CLEARLY and has for the majority of his life, but no matter how hard he searches, this novel seems to be the only source of those familiar plot lines

so he's gotta read the whole thing, right? figure out some clues? maybe send some comments calling the author out on his plagiarism to see if he cracks?

and look, it's really not THAT important, but somehow mobei jun just can't let this go. especially when the novel starts distorting events. IMPORTANT events. like shang qinghua in the novel is just way more of a scummy villain aND IT WASNT LIKE THAT AT ALL

mobei jun has gone his whole fucking life thinking of shang qinghua as some sort of tragic character who suffered until he broke, someone who was beaten by the man who loved him before being murdered by that same man, and now THIS ASSHOLE is painting shang qinghua as this two-dimensional canon fodder villain. and mobei jun's character has also gotten a serious glam up??? LIKE THE NOVEL IS ACTUALLY FRAMING THE MURDER AS A GOOD AND RIGHTEOUS THING THAT MOBEI JUN DID???? mobei jun is a beloved sidekick of the main character and basically gets presented as constantly cool and cold and smart and THAT'S ALL WRONG, THIS STUPID AUTHOR CLEARLY DIDNT UNDERSTAND MOBEI JUN'S CHARACTER AT ALL!!! mobei jun was stupid and scared and traumatized and lashed out in dumb ways and lost to his own pride all the damn time and never bothered to understand human courting rituals or grasp they might be different than demon courting rituals and died pathetically becuase he never bothered to understand himself properly AND BASICALLY KILLED HIMSELF BC HE COULDNT HANDLE LIFE W/O SHANG QINGHUA, WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS FUCKER HAVING MOBEI JUN SHRUG OFF THAT PIVOTAL MOMENT LIKE IT MEANT NOTHING TO HIM?!?! DIDNT HE UNDERSTAND HOW AGONIZINGLY PAINFUL IT HAD BEEN?! WHAT KIND OF GARBAGE FANFICTION IS THIS?! THIS FUCKING HACK OF AN AUTHOR!!

so maybe, just maybe, mobei jun has started to get into fights with the author. arguing about interpretations of his characters and stupid decisions and basically known in the forum as "that one really weird shang qinghua stannie who srsly woobified that canon fodder villain". other people fight him too, but mobei jun is primarly focused on This Fucking Author

airplane, meanwhile, is FURIOUS over this mobei jun hater that keeps cropping up in his comments. look. he's not about to ban the guy. he drums up good drama with his STUPID comments and also hater money is as good as anyone elses, but airplane isnt used to having a person try to bash his fav. mobei jun is... special. and he's not gonna have this twobit virgin of a creepy shang qinghua fan DARE to besmirch mobei jun's name and he will make as many alts as he needs to win this argument! but also he's willing to get the word of god involved! fuck it! he'll revive shang qinghua for a chapter just to have mobei jun kill the weasel again!

and look, neither of them are being sane about this, but they just feel Really Impassioned about their opinions oki

so next hmmm

A) meet at a con (either a signing or w/o knowing who the other is)

B) meet in real life, maybe at work or something (def w/o knowing who the other is, mobei jun is his boss? lol) and start developing feelings for each other irl while maintaining a strong hateship online

C) meet in dreams bc their souls are too interconnected, but only in their past life forms so they still can't recognize each other irl. but now theyre playing out fantasies together in the dream world

im indecisive LOL

[asliceofzosan]

i've seen figure skater sanji and hockey player zoro before. idk if its been explored but i'd love to put it out there:

hockey player sanji (specifically goalie bc he desperately wants to avoid being checked) and then pairs skater zoro.

pairs skater zoro's long time partner has been nami. though many people ship them together a Lot, they just know each other super well. Well enough to try dating and both of them realized they don't swing that way. in fact, it makes them a really good team. they fought long and hard to claim top spots in competitions because they portray a chemistry that's separate from the rest. plus zoro can carry nami like she weighs fucking nothing. so their lifts are so much more dynamic. they even have a whole next to impossible combination that they're trying to get the ISU to name after them officially.

sanji plays for the East Blue Straw Hats in the Grand Line Hockey League – a formidable rookie group that took down lots of big names in the preseason. they want to make it all the way to the postseason playoff finals but always seem to fall short. but theyre so determined. they reignited a lot of old sparks that were no longer there for old fans and brought in new and curious fans. sanji is the starter goalie and a damn good one at that. it makes sense bc goalies are often doing splits on the ice just to make a save. he's perfected the technique that utilizes just his legs to make saves that make the crowd go fuckin insane.

we have the usual "i booked the rink to practice before you did" trope but a little more spice. in actuality, sanji loves watching pairs skating competitions. his favorite pair rn is franky and robin (mostly for robin). and he adamantly does not want to admit to anyone that he watches zoro and nami's routines much more frequently. (and if anyone asks, he always says its bc of nami. its never just bc of nami.) and zoro's besties with luffy so he always watches their matches even if he barely understands the rules. and he definitely does not stare at a certain blond starter goalie most of the match thats fucking ridiculous

one day zoro and sanji are invited to do one of those comparison videos between hockey players and figure skaters. both get to laugh at the other even Attempting to do their sport. zoro frankly looks ridiculous in all of sanji's usual goalie get-up. and sanji couldn't land an euler to save his life. the video producer suggests they try a simple pairs skating routine. sanji is like "oh i couldn't do that–hEY WHAT THE FUCK MOSSHEAD PUT ME DOWN" because zoro lifted sanji and had him sat on his shoulder like it was normal.

zoro smirks, "you might be lighter than nami, actually. wanna be my new partner?"

sanji knees him in the stomach before skating away while blushing so hard he could melt the ice beneath him.

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[slasherscream]

okay in the tags of ur polyam ghostface cooking post you said driving with them would be worse? and I’d be really interested in hearing ur thoughts abt that 👀

A/N: nonny is referencing this ancient post. because the ask is that old. i am but an easily distracted creature of the night, once again. sorry for the wait nonny!

For starters, you can’t let Stu be the one driving. He does not obey the rules of the road. You’re not even sure he knows the rules of the road. If he does, he’s breaking the rules at a frequency level that implies driving unsafely is a casual hobby for him. Like knitting. 

Billy is a better driver. Not always, just when you’re in the car. He’s not gonna risk your life because he likes to go fast and run red lights when he doesn’t see anyone coming.

He’s such a stickler for following the rules in front of you that he side eyes you when you don't do the same. Yes, ladies and gentleman, and gathered beloveds, Billy Loomis is an awful backseat driver. 

He will comment on nearly everything you do while driving the car. Didn’t turn on your signal before changing lines? He noticed. Going over the speed limit? Noticed. Going under the speed limit? Noticed. Didn’t slow down for that curve in the road? Hmmm… lots of things you’re doing wrong. Maybe you should just let him drive. 

If you want to be passenger seat royalty then congratulations! Here’s your boyfriend! If you enjoy driving you will be running to call shotgun on driving, every-time,. Running to beat your boyfriend to the driver’s side car door. Daily humiliation rituals, truly.

It’s enough that you guys have snapped at one another before and finished the drive home in icy silence. You tried to come around to apologize (even though you were not in the wrong) because you know he’s only worried about your safety. 

Also, you were expecting a mutual apology (Billy always sounds pissy, he does not sound any nicer than usual as he’s correcting your driving habits from the passenger seat.) 

So why on Earth did he have to piss you off by saying: “I accept your apology. Just wish you’d pay more attention to the road, honestly.” You have to kill him. It’s the only option left. 

Stu certainly doesn’t help this hostile road environment because he blasts your eardrums to shit every time he gets the AUX. He will also play annoying music on purpose, because he thinks escalating situations is funny. 

He starts playing break up R&B if you guys start really getting into it. Cue Billy turning around to the backseat: “What is your fucking problem, Stu?!”

(One time Stu turned on “I Should Have Cheated by Keyshia Cole” and Billy reached back and started hitting Stu at full strength. You had to pull over the car. What happened to car safety, Billy? What happened to there should be no distractions in the car, Billy?)

Stu would be in charge of navigation but Billy is such a control freak that he can’t let anyone besides himself do it. When he’s the one driving he puts on the navigation voice that tells you when turns are coming up. It interrupts whatever music you have playing every five seconds. He refuses to let you be his navigator. It’s for the better, because if you give Billy a direction too late for him to obey said direction he has to press his lips together very tightly to keep his outside voice from leaving his body in an inside space. 

It’s enough to want to just take a fucking Uber.

[goodnightmemes]

ABIGAIL (2024) SENTENCE STARTERS

❛ Fuck. That’s not part of the plan. ❜

❛ You grab me like that again, I may have to respond. ❜

❛ Y’all might want to hold on to something. It’s about to get real accelerated in this bitch. ❜

❛ You know the rules. No real names, no backstories, and keep the grabass to a minimum. ❜

❛ I’m like a expert at reading people. ❜

❛ Wow. You might be the least perceptive person I’ve ever met. ❜

❛ Crisp $100 bill, you can tell me one true thing about me. ❜

❛ You’ve basically got a fucking neon sign over your head that reads “muscle.” ❜

❛ That’s cheap, considering you come from money. ❜

❛ Don’t ever fuck with me. I will know. ❜

❛ Can you take the blindfold off? It’s really tight. ❜

❛ We’re keeping you here until your father gives us some money. ❜

❛ Do you know who my father is? ❜

❛ Can you promise me you’re not gonna let anybody hurt me? ❜

❛ I pinkie promise you that I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you. ❜

❛ I’m sorry about what’s gonna happen to you. ❜

❛ Oh, my God, you’re gonna be a real pain in my ass, aren’t you? ❜

❛ I don’t scare easy, so when I do, I pay attention. ❜

❛ I like you. You’re scary, though. ❜

❛ What’s going on? What’s going on is that we are fucked. ❜

❛ What if we just, like, you know, like, give her back and say sorry? ❜

❛ If seven million per person isn’t worth the risk, then what is? ❜

❛ Everyone stay alert. Any threat is gonna come from outside, so we set a perimeter and we hold it. ❜

❛ Hey, listen. I don’t trust any of these other fucks. So let’s watch each other’s backs. ❜

❛ His head fell off. ❜

❛ Why do you have a dick on your face? ❜

❛ It looks like a fucking wild animal ripped him apart. ❜

❛ I, for one, would like to revisit the cut-and-run idea. ❜

❛ This whole thing is a trap. ❜

❛ Can you pinkie promise me that you’re not keeping a secret? ❜

❛ We can take ’em. ❜

❛ We’re gonna get through this. ❜

❛ Why’d you do it? Bring us here to kill us. ❜

❛ I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, but you don’t sound very calm right now, Little Miss Paranoid, so forgive the precaution. ❜

❛ Wow. You got a lot going on up there,  but your brain’s not quite putting it together, huh? ❜

❛ You’re not as smart as you think you are. ❜

❛ Fucking put it down. I’d really prefer not to have to fucking shoot you. ❜

❛ We kidnapped a fucking vampire. ❜

❛ Someone has been messing with us ever since we got here. ❜

❛ We got to get out of here. There’s got to be another way. ❜

❛ Okay. What do we know about vampires? ❜

❛ What are we talking about, like Anne Rice or True Blood, you know, Twilight? Very different kind of vampires. ❜

❛ Okay, how do we kill a vampire? ❜

❛ Hey, we got a real fucking situation here. So I don’t give a shit what you think. Either you’re helping us, or you’re dead weight. Which is it? ❜

❛ There’s pool cues in the game room. Go sharpen ’em into stakes. ❜

❛ I’m not betting our lives on your fucking hunch. ❜

❛ All right, let’s go kill us a fuckin’… vampire. ❜

❛ You’re so bloody and so gross. ❜

❛ Oh, if you fucking say, “I told you so.” ❜

❛ Listen, you sit here and bleed, or you trust me. ❜

❛ Vampire on my ass! ❜

❛ I’ll kill you fucking fucks! I’ll rip your fucking heads off and gorge myself on your blood! ❜

❛ I’ve had a few centuries of experience. ❜

❛ Tell us how to get out of here, and we’ll let you go. ❜

❛ Hey, what’s gonna happen to me? Am I gonna turn into a vampire? ❜

❛ We would never have taken you if we knew who your father was. ❜

❛ Haven’t you wondered why I brought you all here? ❜

❛ If this is about revenge, why didn’t you just kill us? Why’d you bring us here? ❜

❛ What can I say? I like playing with my food. ❜

❛ If you touch that door, I will shoot you. ❜

❛ Fuck that shit. I’m not staying down here…with that. ❜

❛ Open the door, and I’ll let you keep all your blood. Oh. Organs, too. ❜

❛ Wait. A deal’s a deal. ❜

❛ Still gullible at your age, you fucking freak? ❜

❛ That’s why I took this job. With that money, I can start over, you know? ❜

❛ God, everybody’s got to be a fucking victim now. ❜

❛ Oh, I’m sorry. Did I hit a fucking nerve? ❜

❛ Fuck this job. ❜

❛ Fucking dream team. ❜

❛ You got any other bright ideas, Nosferatu? ❜

❛ Goddamn it. Why did you all listen to me? This isn’t gonna work. This is so fucking stupid. ❜

❛ You got people out there that you care about? ❜

❛ You and me. You’re my friend. ❜

❛ Lot of painful memories. But it’s never too late to make new ones. ❜

❛ I brought you back here to offer you a deal. ❜

❛ You fucking set me up. ❜

❛ You can die here, or you can help me kill [name]. ❜

❛ Yes, drink, and you’ll be one of us. ❜

❛ Our game ends here. ❜

❛ Well, well, well. Look who came to join the party. ❜

❛ Here’s the thing about being a vampire. It takes a long fucking time to learn how to do all the cool shit. ❜

❛ I came when you needed me. I’m here now. ❜

[v4mpyrsp1t]

rip arcane crew you would have loved video game

viktor: skyrim. because i said so. he’d LOVE the technical aspects of modding esp because he’d see it as a DIY fuck-you to Bethesda's corporate shortcomings. he’d also start saying “by the nine/by talos” unironically. autistic starter pack fr. also because i’m projecting there would be days where he’s off work and sits up after like 18 hours straight of replaying all the good questlines and cracks every bone in his body when he finally remembers to get up and eat and drink water etc. jayce is also not allowed to interrupt skyrim time. it doesn't even look like skyrim anymore tbh with the sheer number of mods he's installed and every time he boots it up it takes 2 minutes to load to main menu and his custom-built PC starts boiling the mug he placed on top of it for that specific reason. When he wants to branch out he and Jayce sit down and play horror games together. They LOVE alien isolation. Jayce always screams which scares him and makes him scream and then he whacks Jayce with the pillow.

jayce: minecraft. audhd classic. he’d also get really into the modding but specifically to make insane beyond-redstone contraptions. with something like the arcane engineering mod. he prob lost his mind when he found out about it. his builds would look like the most god awful thing you’ve ever seen like some sick beast of ugly ass blocks and gears and he’d be cheesing behind you saying “it’s a linear algebra calculator actually. also it can run doom.” he also does megabuilds from time to time and those projects are the most gorgeous toe-curling and detailed works ever and uploaded to his no-commentary youtube channel as a timelapse over the worst royalty-free edm you've ever heard. it has 15 bajillion views and he posts once every 7 months. He's HORRIBLE around horror games he always jumps straight to the ceiling and screams and grabs onto whoever is nearest to him (usually viktor).

mel: gaming "isn't really her thing" but sometimes she hops on multiplayer with everyone if they're having a game night. if she had to pick a favorite game she regularly plays it would be tiny glade or unpacking. something relaxing that she can have control over to take a break from the chaos during the day. she's also a stealth smash/mario kart pro and absolutely no one can beat her. seriously how does she keep doing that. when the group was really into among us they would PRAY she wasn't the impostor because she would WIPE them across the floor every time. It got to the point where if no one seemed to be the impostor they would just default to assuming it was her because she was so good at the strategizing. she would also get really into the artsy indie game scene and browse through game jam collections from time to time. She played through Gris by herself once because it got recommended to her as she was looking through the related section of one of those games and literally could never play it again because she cried so hard but if you ask her she vehemently denies it.

jinx: project sekai colorful stage and lollipop chainsaw. at the same time tbh. nobody knows how she keeps hitting perfect combos on both when she does that. unfortunately she’d prob also hit the tutti frutti mango cart and play breakcore max volume at the same time i don't make the rules. out of nowhere she sometimes stares ekko down and asks "what if you were bit by a zombie and i had to turn your head into a keychain for my belt to save you and we went everywhere together and saved the world and kissed. what are your thoughts on that." She keeps pointing whenever miku comes onto the screen and says "that's me that's literallyyyy meee." She was the main reason why group Overcooked nights are now banned. Don't ask. She's top three in a handful of any% speedrun boards, some in games she doesn't even play outside of figuring out what glitches they have. Her Portal 2 speedrun is a total of 20 minutes and absolutely nobody can figure out how she did it. She also is a huge horror game junkie and her and Vi play multiplayer horror stuff on a regular basis. She wouldn't really jump or react to jumpscares, even when people around her scream, she just immediately moves on which is even scarier to everyone tbh.

ekko: he would LOVE adventure games. especially if there were quests centered around helping people. his main games would be monster hunter, BG3, and he'd prob also like shadow of the colossus and the last guardian. They're all the perfect mix of fantasy, big fucking creatures, and being a nice person simulator. He absolutely can't do an evil run in any game and stopped a BG3 durge playthrough mid-way through Act I because he hated how cruel his character was acting; his last straw was the Alfira cutscene. He tried to do a playthrough with Jinx but she kept taking the most nuclear option every time and they kept hitting a TPK because of all the fights. Him and Viktor trade modding resources and recommend mods to each other it gets really intense. They have this weird competition with each other over who can pull out the craziest modlist for their respective games and everyone is terrified because nobody can stop them and they're so good at it. He and Jinx play a lot of two-player games though; the ones where they fight always almost end in a real-life brawl because they get so competitive with each other.

isha: cookie run. subway surfers. there are hot cheeto crumbs all over her goddamn devices and some weird crust at the edges of the screen that's fused the tablet case to the tablet. she can also bulldoze everyone and their mother in fortnite and writes :3 :33 in the chat every time she kills someone. Lowkey scary with it because while she's playing games she stares wide-eyed at whatever screen it's on and doesn't blink once. She plays a lot of fighting games with Jinx and literally always wins. When they started out Jinx kept saying "get dunked on" every time she beat her and it activated the sleeper agent that made her practice absolutely nonstop. So now she could probably be ranked on a global scoreboard or something. She also hates when the royal match ads pop up just on principle and lets them play out so the stupid purple robed tyrant can drown or burn or whatever else he does in the ads.

Cait: deer hunter pro or something like that. vi tells her the fact that she plays games like that "feels homophobic" for some reason. she also has a deep rivalry with isha in fortnite when they landed on the same server and didn't know it was her for months she would just clench her fist grit her teeth and mutter isha's gamertag in hatred. other than that she's AMAZING at PvP shooter games. she's gone viral here and there for uploading clips where her and Vi make fun of men in the VC while she absolutely destroys them. Her and Vi have also tried to play two-player games like Jinx and Ekko do but both of them got bored ten minutes in and switched back to Valorant. Her and Jinx have gotten into an actual fight during group Nintendo game night because Jinx kept purposefully targeting her with shells or whacking her off the smash arena platform and finding it hilarious. when vi plays rage games and eventually quits she usually picks it up and tries to finish it for her. without fail both of them eventually both give up and take a walk together to calm down so they don't break the controller. other than that she’s a HUGE detective game nerd ofc, and plays those when she has to take a break from work (vi pulls her away from her desk so she can rest). LA noire, disco elysium, detroit become human, evil within. if it’s got a detective in it in any way she hops on it as fast as physically possible. she prob keeps a red string board next to her PC just so she can keep track of clues like a real case and throws a blanket over it when vi comes in the room to make sure she’s turning off her work brain.

Vi: she likes fighting games like moral kombat of course, but she loves horror games as much as Jinx. Unfortunately the two of them are on Roblox horror games literally all the fucking time it's insufferable. She would probably also LOVE stuff like tomb raider; she wanted to buy a lesbian flag with lara croft photoshopped onto it to hang in the living room "because i'm patriotic" and cait told her absolutely not. while playing online with cait the two of them are absolutely unstoppable, esp when VC is turned on. they have a tally on a dry erase board on the fridge that keeps track of how many people they made rage quit. her and jayce also try to play co-op games and everyone physically steps in to stop them because they fumble so bad and blame it on the game design. there's something called "the incident" where they were all trying out the forest and the two of them managed to collapse the group's entire base in two axe swings. She is also now banned from playing rage games like getting over it or chained together.

[ccscocoapuffs]

Mark Hoffman NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) Mark is rather complex when it comes to aftercare. He definitely has to have strong trust in you to let his guard down and show you the softer side to truly care for you. The way he does this though is mostly through pulling you into his chest and gently playing in your hair. It's lowkey a head cannon of mine that Mark likes to fidget (ILL EXPLAIN THIS IN A UPCOMING POST!)

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) Mark loves his hands, I mean after all they do all his work. They allow him to pleasure you, caress you, and his personal favorite finger you. Marks an ass man....need I say more.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) Mark doesn't really like super messy, He prefers to simply cum inside you. He would never admit it but he has a thing for watching it drip outta you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) Mark secretly enjoys when you're a brat. Despite how rough he can be with punishments and how he wants you to follow his rules like a good little pet, he loves when you brat. It excites him for what he knows is about to come.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) Mark definitely has experience, He knows exactly how to make you cum over and over again just with his fingers. Mark is also quick to adapt to what his partner likes, aka he's a quick leaner for each individual he's been with. ( *cough* Strahm *cough*)

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) Mark's favorite is doggy style without a doubt. He loves that he can not only pull your hips into him as fast as he wants but he can pull your hair, slap your ass, reach around and choke you....what more could you ask for.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) Mark keeps it serious. I mean for starters its mark has anyone seen the man so much as smile? He's a serious guy and he likes it that way. Plus sex is kind of his way to get relief from a rough day or from being pissed off from whoever has done it this time. He uses sex as his release both psychical and mental, hence the seriousness.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) Mark takes pride in his appearance, he keeps it trimmed down and presentable. The carpet definitely matches the drapes, Mark has Dark brown pubes that are the same as his hair.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) Mark actually can be kind of romantic at times. Now don't get your hopes up he isn't the rose petals and champagne kind of guy. But he may light a few candles and start things off really slow and sensual. However he's still gonna rip your clothes off you and absolutely rail you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) Mark usually doesn't have the time. He stays super busy with work, both at the police department and with John. When he gets some free time he isn't gonna waste it on masturbating, He has you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) KINKY BITCH. Bdsm, choking, Daddy kink, spanking, and spit, just to name a few. Mark always keeps it interesting that's for sure.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) His office, Mark loves when you come to visit him and he gets to bend you over his desk and take what he wants. Mark also has a soft spot for fucking on his bed, he likes the comfortability of a familiar place and the privacy.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) Mark Likes it when you wear skirts or dresses. He especially loves it if you don't wear panties with them. Nothing turns him on more than the thought that people are looking and he gets to show them you're all his. Whether it be by him keeping his hand on your waist all the time or from the other officers talking about the moans that come from his office when you are visiting him.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) Anything that involves you getting involved with Jigsaw. Mark doesn't want John to take advantage of you and use you as leverage against Mark. His biggest fear is losing you too.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Now hear me out here, I feel like Mark actually likes giving. He loves burying his face into you and moaning against you so you can get off on the vibrations from him being so fucking turned on by you. He eats pussy like a god 100%. However, he prefers receiving. He wants to fuck your fac though, he likes to be in control and use your throat for his gain.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) Mark is always ROUGH. It's his only setting, he loves sensual kissing though. He wants to slowly suck on your collarbones, nip your neck just a little, then flip you around and fuck you into the mattress.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) Mark doesn't really like quickies but sometimes its want you got to do. As mentioned before he loves fucking you on his desk, He loves that spot the most especially for quickies.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Mark doesn't really experiment, he knows what he likes and he likes sticking to it. However he does love risky teasing in public, like slipping his finger into you while you're out for dinner or making you keep him warm while he's talking to another officer in his office.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) Mark can go for about 3-4 rounds depending on the day he's had. If he's had a rough day and he's tired you're looking at a quick fuck. If he's had a stressful day, boy are you gonna be there awhile.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) Mark is on the fence about toys. He for sure uses his handcuffs and he likes use Anal plugs on you (if you let him). Though he doesn't really like dildos or vibrators, you're his, only he gets to control your pleasure.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) EXTREMELY unfair. Mark gets off on teasing you, he wants to get you all worked up till the point you are begging for him to take you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) Mark isn't very loud, he mostly just grunts ands groans. When he cums he tends to be louder and let out a deep moan as he buries his face in your neck.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) He keeps a sexy picture of you clipped to the visor in hi patrol car. It's for when he works late nights, all he has to do is look up and take in how sexy your body is and how he get to go home and have you all to himself.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) Mark is about 6 inches in length, He's very thick though. It's something he prides himself on, how much he stretches you.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) Medium, Mark can be either really chill or really horny. It really just depends what he's feeling.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Mark doesn't fall asleep quicky after sex, he's usually up for at least an hour afterwards. That's if he has time to lay down with you and fall asleep. He wants to pull you close and hold you for a bit before he falls asleep. He would never say it but he wants to make sure you are safe and comfortable, hence why he keeps an eye on you for a bit.

[xanthi-of-ithaca]

Open roleplay starter: Hold Them Down

Planning was not something he liked. He usually just went ahead and did whatever came into his mind and took it as a base. But he really couldn't do that now, could he?

Antinous had been eavesdropping on the conversations amongst the nobles, hearing their schedules, the upcoming events between kingdoms.. but none of them seemed like the moment to strike. There was always something that could go wrong.

Until that day. A diplomatic mission for the young prince while the rest of the nobles were entertained by some sort of dinner. That would be his chance. And what was even better, Penelope had recently given them a challenge.. which had only made them frustrated. Everything seemed to align so.. perfectly.

After watching every single suitor fail at their attempt of stringing that ancient bow (which he thought was going break after 2 attempts), he stood up. As usual, they expected him to say something; he was their voice, the only one who dared voice his thoughts without regard of who he might hurt by doing so.

"Screw this damn competition, we've been here for.. what? Hours? It's obvious we can't string that thing."

Antinous spoke up, playing with his dagger as his eyes darted around the room. His breath still had that scent of wine, despite having been sober for a week or two now.

"Fuck this damn challenge. We don't have to accept any more delays from her.. can't you see she's just playing with us?"

He asked the rest, watching their expressions change at the thought of being deceived by a woman, no less. He knew them to well.. just enough to make them upset about the whole thing.

Though, as he stepped closer to the center of the room, he began getting second thoughts.. he quickly suppresed them, knowing it was too late already.

"This is how Penelope is holding us down, like we are no better than animals. She's waiting until the prince is finally considered fit to rule. Where the hell is our pride and rage?! Where did our domain over this situation go?!"

His steps were calculated, he had planned this for weeks and he was not willing to let it all go to waste because of a miscalculation. Soon enough, he found himself in front of one of the tables in the middle of the room. He didn't even bother asking the rest to move, he just pushed through them and got on the table, just to make sure all 107 suitors could hear him speak. Despite feeling nervous as fuck, he tried to play confident as always.

@the-epic-amphinomus @sonofpolybus @bright-side-of-the-moon-tele @penelope-is-waiting @thetorturedsuitor

[levissslutt]

𝕋𝕙𝕖 ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕗𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕠𝕣 | 𝕋. 𝔽𝕦𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕘𝕦𝕣𝕠

Maya is the daughter and the only child of the infamous gang leader and hitman Suguru Geto. She had started her second semester as a third year college student, but for the past year, shed been dreaming of this mystery man, tall, daunting, and dangerous. Every morning shed wake to an uneasy feeling, as if the dreams meant so much more. Walking into class, she sees him, and does shit take a wild turn.

𝔹𝕦𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕗𝕝𝕚𝕖𝕤

It is now late afternoon. You and Ashanti talked for hours in the dining hall, until they closed for dinner, about nothing in particular. You were tempted to tell her about whats going on, but considering the age difference and the fact that he's a professor, and well some more obvious reasons, like he's apart of a fucking gang, you decided against it.

Gathering the trash you cleaned up the table and headed back to your dorm rooms.

"I'll see you later Shanti, text me ok?."

"I will" she yelled back.

As you got back in your room you immediately stripped and hopped in the shower.

After doing your shower routine and daily TED talk you got out. You checked your phone seeing you had a text from Toji. "Meet me outside when you see this pretty girl :)."

"He's 40 years old and text like that, oh boy."

30 minutes later, you finally walked out to his car. "Goddamn it took you long enough." You smiled at him, "but don't I look cute?". His eyes flickered to your bare legs and back to your eyes. He smirked. "Don't be weird, I was talking about my shoes."

"Yea whatever." He chuckled, driving off.

"I ordered take out, so we can take it back to my place, is that ok?". You nodded, "I didn't have a preference anyways". You noticed his different attire, not realizing he had so many tattoos. As he drove you studied him, his broad shoulders, his stern expression, his light green eyes, his jawline, my god he's so fine.

"You checking me out?"

You forgot people know you're looking at them, oh god that's embarrassing. "Maybe" you mumbled, turning to look out the window.

He found that quite amusing. Truth be told he didn't mind one bit.

Fifteen minutes later yall arrived at the restaurant. "I'll be right back", he says.

Sitting in the passenger seat you notice how nice his car is. "I know for a fact he did not buy this car on his college professor salary." You were getting antsy so you decided to look in the glove compartment. Rule of thumb, you'll find out a lot about a person by whats in their glove compartment.

Your dad taught you that. You opened that shit and sitting neatly in there was a pistol, very much worn out . "The hell..." Toji opened the door to find you holding it. You turned and pointed it at him. "Pew pew."

"Kid what the hell are you doing?". "I found your pistol, why do you have this?". "Better question is why do you have it?", he asked getting in the car. "Even better question, why do you know what kind of gun that is?". You smiled, "Lucky guess". He could tell he knew you were familiar with the deadly item from the way you were holding it."I know you're lying" he said, "but I guess there are some things we are both lying about."

You tilted your head, smiling at him. "You're right, for starters, I know you didn't buy this car on a college professor salary". He lets out a snort as he pulls out of the parking lot. He knew your dad probably taught you any and everything there is to know about weapons and hand to hand combat.

He was one of those paranoid people who took precautions on everything, like picking your school...and teaching his only child combat that you would never actually need.

The thought of him just so happening to work at this school didn't seem like such a coincidence anymore. You knew nothing was wrong or anything or that you weren't in any danger, but you have dreams about this mystery man who plays with guns with your dad, and now he just so happens to work at this unknown ass school in the middle of buttfuck? Uh uh.

You looked at him. "Hmm?" he hums. " My dad sent you here?"

"Sharp as hell aren't you?" You called that shit, sneaky bastard. "Well it wasn't that hard to put two and two together." However there was absolutely no way in hell you were telling him about those dreams, fuck no.

Y'all arrived at his house, it was fucking huge. "Just you?." He trailed behind you to the front door. "Uh yea, why?"

"People who have huge houses, and it's only them living there, either are sex addicts or kill people for a living."

He scoffed at you, not saying anything. He then gave you his key to unlock the door, so he wouldn't drop the food. You stepped inside and looked around. To the right was the kitchen and past that the dining room. To your left was the living room and directly in front of you was a huge double sided stair case. It was cute however nothing matched. "Your decor is god awful."

"Look here little girl you don't have to comment on every little thing."

Ignoring the maniac in front of you you stepped around him in disbelief. "Your couch is in the middle of the floor, are you ok?" He set the food down and made himself comfortable. "I cannot believe I'm being insulted by a mf half my age." You laughed, "I wasn't all that serious it isn't that bad."

It actually was, but he seemed a little embarrassed so you dropped it, it wasn't exactly empty just nothing matched and everything was in odd places.

Shaking your head at the mans layout you made your way over to where he was in his kitchen. The kitchen however was kind of cute, it had a marble gray backsplash behind the stove with matching dish clothes, and decor. You smiled at yourself in the vast improvement but spared him another sly remark.

He made our plates as you sat across from him at the dining table. "Why did he send you here." You waisted no time.

"Straight to it huh?". You nodded, you were curious to know how the hell we got here, considering you didn't even know he existed 48 hours ago.

Well you had heard the name before, but nonetheless the man in front of you was otherwise a stranger to you. Besides those dreams of course.

"I don't work for him if that's what you're thinking, more like I work with him."

"Is that not the same thing?", you asked through a mouthful of food. "No, see he isn't my boss. I am my own boss, with my own men." You were utterly confused. "But you all are apart of the same gang, so how do you not work for him?"

"Like I said Im my own boss with my own men." He said this slowly looking at you through unreadable eyes.

You leaned back in your chair a bit. "Wait I remember now, I forget about that sometimes." The Black Panthers are the gang they are all in. More widely known as The Tags. Your dad is the leader, he's the founder and runs pretty much everything, You didn't know how you forgot, but besides your dad there are other founding members Gojo, Nanami, Nico, Worick, and of course Toji. Including your dad thats six men and they all run their own regiments.

He kept you completely separate from that life, like completely. Growing up he didn't even keep weapons in the house. The only one of them you'd met was of course your uncle Gojo who damn near raised you with your dad, however Toji was a name that had many stories behind it, hence why you'd heard the name but never met the man, as if they had time to anyways.

The tags are just that damn big. Well over ten thousand men in each group. You've never met Nico, Nanami, or Worick. You grew up around Gojo, and obviously you never met Toji until today. There's a reason you never really met them. Toji watches you closely as you eat and analyze everything slowly.

"I see your gears moving." Toji said. "I just don't get why he has you working at the uni, aren't you all too busy for that."

"You're sharp, but not that bright."

"Fuck you ." He got up and walked over to me. Leaning his weight on both hands on the side of the table. "Im one of the founding members of your dads gang and you think Im here at your school for no reason? You said it yourself earlier."

" Well yea I was just thinking you wouldn't be here unless something was wrong-"

And then it clicked. Something was wrong so very very wrong. Even though earlier you had ruled that out, you ere very wrong.

His eyes shifted to the floor, his facade fading.

" Geto is missing."

Your breathe caught in your throat. Your words came out in a whisper eyes flickering to the tall man. " What do you mean he's missing."

"I didn't mean to stall like this or drop it on you like that because we have reasons to believe he's fine, we just haven't been able to get in contact with him, and in the case this was ever to happen I was to look after you."

He looked sincere when he spoke I know they wouldn't lie about his wellbeing, but he might still be holding something back. As soon as that thought crossed your mind "did Gojo know" you blurted out.

He looked conflicted, again like he was holding something back.

"That's not my place to s-"

You cut him off no longer in the mood to eat.

" Did he know Toji?" You asked again raising your voice.

His shoulders dropped " yea."

Why the fuck would he not tell you something like that.

The two of you talked for bout an hour after that conversation. He felt really bad about the whole situation considering you didn't know anything and were kept out of the loop. After drilling him for more answers you calmed a bit realizing Gojo couldn't say anything.

"Do you want to watch a movie?", he asked. Trying to ease the tension. "Answer one more question and then I will watch a movie with you", "hit me" he says as he leans back in his chair.

"Can you go back over your lecture from earlier?" You questioned with a smile.

He returned the same toothy grin " Sure pretty girl, but next time you ought to pay attention and not stare off into space."

He briefly explained some important points from earlier and ended with " But don't worry well be talking about this subject for a few weeks you'll have plenty of time to grasp it, and Im not giving you exceptions you better do your damn work."

" Well yes sir" You half heartedly saluted at him.

The entire time you'd been with him he thought you didn't notice, but just as you were checking him out in the car ride he was doing the same to you, a lot more subtly, though. He loved the way your hair fell to your mid back, you had locs and the ones in the front where a bit shorter causing you to constantly tuck them behind your ears, or even when a few locs fell into your eyes and you'd shift them away was mesmerizing to him for some reason.

You had piercings taking up each side of your ear damn near leaving no room, as well as a brow piercing with a few more jewelry pieces in your face. He wondered where else you had piercings.

To Toji you looked nothing like your father, but every bit of your late mother was there in the flesh. He'd never in 100 million years and then some, admit this, but way way back in the day when him and your dad first met, he had actually hit it off with your mom, but she picked Geto in the end. He'd never let it all the way go and even at his big age had never been in a serious relationship.

The thoughts where lingering in the back of his head as he moved into the living room watching your every move.

You decided to watch Twilight, your favorite movie. It was the scene were Bella was playing baseball with Edwards family. You were sitting next to him on the miss-placed couch when your phones buzzed. You looked at the notification, "oh fuck yea" you said, "the hell?" Toji muttered. Classes had been cancelled until further notice. "Thats some shady shit", the man next to you said."

"Welp that means we are having a sleepover." You announced.

"You can't just invite yourself to stay the night at other peoples houses." Toji says as he leans back into the couch resting his arm on the back, manspread.

"Why not, it isn't like you're going to say no".

He chuckled and pulled you closer, "true".

The action made you freeze, but he didn't shift any further than that so you eventually relaxed into his side.

The movie finished, but it was only 9 pm.  "Hey where's your bathroom I want to take a shower", "hold on i'll show you and I'll get you some clothes". He walked you to his bathroom and then left to find something comfortable you could wear. You folded your clothes up on the counter and stepped in the steaming shower after letting it run for a few seconds. He came back in the bathroom shortly after holding some clothes for you.

"I realized I'm like 3 times your size, so I brought you a t-shirt and some fuzzy socks that I can't fit." You laughed softly at the thought of this scary looking man having fuzzy socks, then again you can never go wrong with some fuzzy socks, "I appreciate it."

It did not go unnoticed all he gave you was a shirt and some dam socks.

You were shocked to see the kind of products he bathes with. Usually men bathe with all purpose cleaner. You can use that shit to clean a truck engine. But he had mostly dove products. And that aromatherapy body wash from bath and body works. He had a lip scrub too, thats so cute.

You washed and stepped out, greeted with a fluffy blue towel and the clothes Toji put on the counter for you. The other clothes from earlier were gone. He left a travel size lotion and deodorant you could use. You finished your business and stepped out to find Toji sprawled out on his bed.

It was a king, but his big ass took up the entire bed. "You done brat?"

"Yea I thought you fell asleep on me." He rolled over on his back "I may be old, but I can hang." He motioned for you to come closer. You got up on the bed and sat on his lap facing him.

He froze much like how you did on the couch earlier. His eyes flickered something dark that made you shift. " Bold of you sweetheart."

You weren't about to back down now. " Seeing how far you'll let me go." He was staring right through you. Not saying a word. Most people in this situation would be uncomfortable, but his eyes, those damn eyes gave you butterflies. He leans in, pressing his lips to yours.

That lip scrub does its job cause his lips are so damn soft. You kiss him back scooting closer to him, wanting to feel all of his warmth. His hands slide down to your hips, not breaking the kiss. You cup his cheeks and deepen the kiss as he slides his hand under your shirt, hands resting on your bare skin. His touch sent chills down your spine. You wanted more, but before you got what you wanted he broke the kiss, leaning back a bit. Giving you that same look from earlier only with more lust. His eyes flickered with passion.

"Marry me."

[watcherintheweyr]

Can they make a post with their opinion on young alicent please? (English is not my first language, I hope I used the pronouns correctly. If not, I apologize)

Hello! I’m sorry this took me so long, I had written out this entire response and somehow tumblr fucking ate it.

So for starters, you didn’t quite get the pronoun use right, but that’s totally fine and I really appreciate you trying! Pronouns and the english language are a bitch to learn. So when someone’s pronouns are ‘they/them’ those pronouns only replace gendered pronouns- (he/his/he’s/she/her/hers/she’s). Non gendered pronouns (you/your/you’re/yours) are entirely fine. So this would’ve been ‘Can you make a post with your opinion on young Alicent?’. If you were then to talk about me, it’d be ‘I asked watcherintheweyr to make a post about their opinion on young Alicent’ or ‘Watcherintheweyr made a post explaining their thoughts on young Alicent because I asked them.’

Don’t feel bad pls- the English language is a total bitch, and genuinely you put more effort into trying to get it right than a lot of native english speakers who I interact with. And I really do appreciate it.

anyways, on to your question!

So while I have a lot of sympathy for young Alicent in a lot of ways- I don’t like her, and I never did. For starters, I absolutely despise that the show isolated Rhaenyra and made Alicent her only friend and companion, which was untrue in the books and also makes no sense for how royalty works. Rhaenyra, as the only princess, would’ve have a sizeable ‘household’ of young ladies around her age. Those girls would’ve been essentially her helpers and her companions- she would’ve been in lessons alongside them, and they would’ve worked together in matters of court, politics, and events. Canonically she had a gaggle of young girls she was very close to- to the point that when (SPOILERS) Rhaenyra is murdered by Aegon, her ‘youngest and gentlest’ lady, Elinda Massey, purportedly gouges out her eyes from the trauma and horror.

Also, I despise that Laena Velaryon’s story and importance in Rhaenyra’s life was sacrificed for Alicent Hightower- including their deeply hinted romantic connection.

Anyways, moving on. Alicent Hightower.

Ultimately, I think that Alicent is a tragic example of what happens when you buy into oppressive regimes- further and enable them because you think you’ll be rewarded for sacrificing others to those regimes, and realize far too late that you won’t. She has 100% bought into the Faith of the Seven and Otto and Westeros’ sexism, and she serves that system in the hope that she’ll be rewarded for it, for playing by the rules and sabotaging the power and autonomy of other women- especially Rhaenyra. And all the seeds and groundwork are THERE from episode one if you pay attention. Alicent is a self-righteous hypocrite and not nearly as intelligent as she thinks she is- and she is also a victim of Otto, Viserys, and the patriarchy. I also think she was never a good friend to Rhaenyra- and that she never really knew Rhaenyra.

(This post is going to be VERY long, so buckle up)

In episode one, we see very quickly that Alicent doesn’t understand Rhaenyra well, if at all. She makes the comment that Rhaenyra is ‘disagreeable’ when she’s worried- and is promptly baffled that Rhaenyra’s worry is not her position or about being ‘overshadowed’ for a son- that Rhaenyra genuinely hopes her father will get the son he’s wanted for her entire life, and that her only true worry is her mother. Emma D’Arcy and Milly Alcock both press that Rhaenyra is fully aware that due to her gender that she isn’t ‘enough’ for her parents or the realm, that she’s seen as lacking or deficient. Alicent doesn’t seem at all aware of this. Furthermore, Alicent’s question is… Odd. At this point in the story, Rhaenyra is only ‘a’ princess. She isn’t the heir- Daemon is. The only ‘overshadowing’ that could occur is Viserys’ already fleeting and inconsistent ‘love’ becoming even less present. And Rhaenyra is already expecting this; but Alicent presses more of Rhaenyra’s ‘position’.

Now bear in mind- in the past 10 years, 14 year old Rhaenyra has had to watch her father insist on and continually risk her mother’s life and health, and she’s had to mourn 5 siblings- some born, others not. So Rhaenyra being ‘disagreeable’ when she’s worried makes sense. But when she doesn’t budge on not wanting to talk about/prioritize her ‘position’, Alicent gets huffy and makes to leave. She then appears to be entirely stunned when Rhaenyra verbatim recites the current passage of history that they are learning from their Septa. This piece of information is given to us to set up and establish Rhaenyra’s clever mind and interest in learning- of the 5 episodes we have of Young!Rhaenyra, she is shown to be actively listening to and learning from her superiors in just about all of them, reading and learning from books in 3 of them, and utilizing courtly intrigue, manners, and speak in 3 of them to shut down opponents or disrespect. And yet Alicent is entirely taken aback by Rhaenyra doing this; which again lends itself to the idea that she doesn’t actually know Rhaenyra very well. In the script, at the end of the episode, it’s also expressed that Alicent doesn’t seem to understand Rhaenyra being stressed/worried about her investiture as heir- in her eyes, Rhaenyra now has everything anyone could want. Meanwhile, Rhaenyra has now been revealed the truth of why Aegon conquered the seven kingdoms- and has now been entrusted with learning to rule and govern the kingdoms, and to nurture and protect the legacy meant to fulfill this prophecy- and she is shown to be very aware of and affected by the weight of this.

Alicent, meanwhile, has become a pawn in her father’s bid for power, and a victim to his ambitions, and to Viserys’ sexism and passivity.

In episode 2, Alicent has been seeing Viserys in secret for six months- and notably, it’s 6 months into their meetings that Viserys expresses that he wishes for her not to tell Rhaenyra, as he doesn’t think she would ‘understand’. We see that she is harming herself and Otto doesn’t appear to care about it in any way more meaningful than why she would do so when she’s the most beautiful girl at court- a thing to be envied and admired. We also in this episode see how fully she has bought into the realm and the Faith’s sexism. When Rhaenyra comes to Alicent about her fears of the plots of the lords to marry her father off again now that his period of mourning is coming to an end, and as such they would be plotting to supplant her. She is struggling, because it’s shown that she is trying to act as heir, to learn and participate- because she WANTS this, wants to be heir, wants to do it and do it well- but Otto undermines and humiliates her, and Viserys simply lets it happen- practically enables it. She expresses her fears of these plots and her frustrations and desire to be the heir, to be more and grasp for more than she would’ve ever been allowed as ‘Viserys’ little girl’.

And Alicent’s response is to dismiss Rhaenyra’s fears- to tell her friend and the named heir to the throne that it ‘isnt their place to question the plots of kings and men’. Because Alicent does not believe women can or should hold genuine power- like she says in episode 9, women are meant to ‘gently guide those who [rule]’. And she does this while she is actively a part of one of those very plots that Rhaenyra fears. Now, bear in mind; I am fully aware that Alicent is a victim to her father’s ambitions, and Viserys’ complicity. It’s not Alicent’s fault what these men do to her. And it’s understandable why Alicent wouldn’t want to tell Rhaenyra, in a lot of ways.

That doesn’t change that both Alicent AND Viserys broke Rhaenyra’s trust and hurt her- and she is shown later to be trying to create distance from them- because they have both shown that Rhaenyra cannot trust them. Viserys because he’s self-serving and blind, and Alicent because her ultimate loyalty and obeisance will always be to her father, not Rhaenyra. And Rhaenyra is keenly aware of this after the reveal, even though it is never made clear to Rhaenyra that Alicent wasn’t seeing Viserys in secret of her own volition. That doesn’t change that for six months, since the *night* of Aemma’s funeral, Alicent was seeing Viserys in secret, whilst dismissing Rhaenyra’s fears of that exact sort of plot to her face. That doesn’t change the fact that Rhaenyra has every right to feel hurt, feel betrayed, and not want anything to do with Alicent- or Viserys, beyond what she cannot avoid.

On a note that’s entirely personal, while I know that Alicent was attempting to share something important to her with Rhaenyra in an attempt to help her feel better, to me, Alicent having Rhaenyra partake of her faith felt… strange. Rhaenyra, who named the dragon she shared a cradle with after a goddess of Old Valyria and who has no idea how to pray in a Sept to the Seven, clearly either is not religious or follows Valyrian faiths- and considering her Valyrian marriage to Daemon, it’s likely the latter. Personally- I would not want a friend of mine to try and have me participate in their religion, and I wouldn’t push them to participate in mine either. For me, that was just uncomfortable; but again that’s a purely personal issue.

In episode 3, we see these traits of Alicent’s repeat, as well as her inability to introspect or consider someone else’s feelings. Immediately in the Godswood she uses her ‘weight’ as queen to disregard Rhaenyra attempting create space and distance between them. And while yes it was on command from the King- the way Alicent does it is almost… Smug. She then attempts to tell Rhaenyra that ‘things need not be this way’- as Rhaenyra, upset, goes to change and ready herself for the hunt, despite the fact that this is the last place she wishes to be. Alicent is upset at the loss of her friend, and likely lonely- but she disregards Rhaenyra’s feelings entirely. This is further compounded by the scene in the carriage.

Despite the fact that she and Alicent are not friends, nor truly even speaking, Rhaenyra, who watched her mother struggle and suffer pregnancies, and lose multiple babes and her life, expresses concern that Alicent is traveling in her condition. In an incredibly clumsy attempt to soothe her concerns, Alicent makes the comment that ‘Aegon came quickly and without fuss.’ Again; i understand that this was a very clumsy attempt to ease Rhaenyra’s worry, however everyone in that carriage sees how poorly the comment lands, and Alicent makes no attempt at apology. ‘Aegon came quickly and without fuss’ is.. very insensitive to say to the girl that lost her mother to the childbed, and especially when you are quite literally sitting in that mother’s place- when you’ve replaced her because her last child killed her and died alongside her. If she had made any attempt at apology (the way Rhaenyra did when she saw a comment she made while expressing her frustrations hurt Alicent in e.4), that would be one thing; but she doesn’t.

Rhaenyra is heir- and canonically the only duty she has balked at is marriage. She is currently desperately holding on to being ‘the heir’ with everything she has- because it is all she has, the only thing that doesn’t make her replaceable with the new family that Viserys is building with Alicent- and as such it’s understandable that she doesn’t wish to go to Aegon’s second Name-day celebration, as she is keenly aware of the thing Viserys is blind to and that Alicent is passive to; the realm considers a 2 year old boy child more valuable and more worthy than the 17 year old princess who has actively been learning to be and acting as heir for three years at this point. Alicent’s uncle, Hobart Hightower, welcomes them by crying out ‘All Hail Aegon the Conqueror-Babe, second of his name!’ and neither Viserys nor Alicent does anything. Hobart is not corrected, nor taken to task, and the crown is rabidly enamored with the two year old child all because his genitalia makes him more ‘valuable’ than Rhaenyra. By calling Aegon ‘second of his name’ Hobart is saying the quiet part out loud- the realm all expects and wants for Aegon to be heir, for Rhaenyra to be set aside. Alicent is the queen- but she doesn’t care enough to correct her uncle, either because she does already think her son should be heir or because she doesn’t think it’s a woman’s place to correct a man.

Later in this same episode, she gives an incredibly half-hearted defense of Rhaenyra when Otto begins to speak literal treason- but she does bend to his will yet again, and goes to Viserys with the intent of pushing Aegon’s claim. She is aware in *episode 3* that her father is conspiring against Rhaenyra’s ascension, and she never says a word of it to Viserys or Rhaenyra, because she is Otto’s creature first, and because she agrees- Rhaenyra is a woman, and thus cannot and should not rule.

Episode 4 and 5 really bring Alicent’s hypocrisy and self-centeredness to a head and set the stage for the cruel abuser that she becomes. She is the story of a victim-turned abuser, in the end.

It starts out more positively, with Alicent and Rhaenyra attempting to rekindle their friendship, and discussing Rhaenyra’s tour. Alicent expresses an almost childish lack of understanding of the truth of Rhaenyra’s courtship tour- calling it romantic, seeing it as something dreamlike. Rhaenyra exposes the cold truth of it- after we had earlier seen that none of the options she’s offered (that we see) are actually suitable. She uses courtly manners and speak to have Lord Dondarrion essentially take himself out of the running, by getting him to speak of his age and simply agreeing with him- and is then presented with a literal child. She is fully aware that every man ‘courting’ her doesn’t love her, doesn’t want HER. They want her valyrian blood. They want their children to be dragonriders. They want proximity to the throne and power. Rhaenyra has to choose a consort; and the consequences if she chooses wrong are disastrous. She could choose a man who turns her into what Viserys did to Alicent and Aemma, she could choose a man who utilizes Westerosi patriarchal views and values and turns her into a puppet queen so that he has the actual power, or she could choose a man who is, ultimately, weak- and thus would not be able to support her claim, would not be able to support or defend her when she ascends. She expresses these frustrations- but when she sees one of her comments hurts Alicent, she immediately holds her hand and squeezes in an attempt at comfort and apology.

Alicent expresses that she has found that she has few friends, lately; and this comment is.. Interesting, in what it says of Alicent. That even at the height of female power in the realm, she cannot inspire loyalty or affection in those around her, that the only prospect she has for a friend is her childhood companion. Rhaenyra expresses a hope to grow closer again as well; but well.

Immediately we shift to the scene in the Godswood where Alicent confronts Rhaenyra with her father’s accusations. She comes into the confrontation immediately condescending and judgemental, looking down on Rhaenyra’s rebellious and adventurous nature, as well as her ‘queer Targaryen customs’, and the ‘crimes’ of which she is accused. Because remember; at this point, Alicent has bought entirely into the way the realm and the Faith views women; women who follow the rules, subservient and obedient, never reaching for more, sacrificing and doing their duty, are good, should be rewarded. Anything else is morally deficient, wrong, lesser. Given this and how she approaches the conversation; it is entirely understandable that Rhaenyra doesn’t trust Alicent, and relies on misdirection and her mother’s memory as well as their former closeness to protect herself, because through this entire conversation, it is obvious that if she knew the truth, Alicent *would not protect Rhaenyra.*

Now remember, Alicent speaks with Viserys in ‘defense’ of Rhaenyra- and she knows FULLY well that Viserys doesn’t believe that nothing happened, that Rhaenyra is restless, chaotic, and willful, and that she would have done as she pleases. (Made worse by Viserys bemoaning that Rhaenyra is ‘just a girl’ when 5 years ago he married Alicent and has had 2 children by her at this point and will have 2 more- plus he has been pushing and pressuring for Rhaenyra to marry for at least 3 of those years.)

Later, when Otto is dismissed, Alicent states what we all know to be true; he got himself into this position, because he kept pushing for Aegon to be made heir, to the point of committing treason and spying on the princess, salivating for a moment where she misbehaves that he can use against her. Here we see Alicent begin to believe the seeds Otto has been planting; that Rhaenyra would kill her siblings to secure her ascension. (Remember, the whole reason of the juxtaposition between the boar and the white stag in episode.3 is to directly contradict this. Rhaenyra attacks and kills the boar only because it harmed her and her knight. Killing the white stag would have helped her- it would have made the lords of Westeros see her as chosen, especially since she caught and killed it the day AFTER Aegon’s name day, and it revealed itself to HER [symbolizing that yes, Rhaenyra is the rightful heir and the RIGHT heir]. Killing it would have given her legitimacy beyond legitimacy and silenced MANY of the tongues that are conspiring against her. However she shows it mercy- despite the fact that its’ death would have served her) Despite having once ‘loved’ Rhaenyra, and ‘known’ her, somehow these lies make sense to Alicent and she believes them. (Furthermore, she somehow is shocked in ep.9 that the reverse is true- that to secure Aegon’s ascension, the easiest and most acceptable route to all the men around her who wield the true power, is to kill Rhaenyra and all of her children).

When later Larys mentions the delivery of a tea to Rhaenyra’s chambers on orders of the king (despite, again, her KNOWING that Viserys doesn’t believe nothing happened) she decides to look further into the matter; even though clearly Viserys wishes it dead and buried, left behind in the dust of her father’s departure of the capitol.

In ep.5, when Alicent discovers that Criston Cole slept with Rhaenyra, it all comes to a head. Despite the fact that Rhaenyra didn’t ‘lie’ (she did not sleep with Daemon), in this moment, Rhaenyra has solidified herself in Alicent’s mind as morally deficient, as less, and it infuriates her. The fact that Rhaenyra has taken charge of ehr body and autonomy in a way that Alicent would never have dared infuriates her; because a part of her had always accepted and even wished for what she assumed would be the order of things. That Rhaenyra would ‘sacrifice and do her duty’ and lay down to suffer the whims and wills of the men around them at Alicent’s side. That they would be united in that suffering. That they would be defanged and declawed the way the Faith extolls women must be, to ‘gently guide’ the men in power alongside them. (Ironic considering how later Alicent utterly fails in ‘guiding’ every man in power around her.)

Alicent has followed every rule and every tradition, does her duty no matter the discomfort, and the fact that Rhaenyra is daring to grasp for more, for power of her own, for happiness and autonomy, and isn’t being punished for it infuriates her. Infuriates her to the point that only Rhaenyra’s trasngression matters. To her, it doesn’t matter that Criston Cole broke his vows and slept with the princess because he valued desire over duty (as explicitly stated by Fabien and by ep.4’s directors)- he is a man. Only Rhaenyra must be punished. It doesn’t matter to her that Rhaenyra has bowed to her father’s will and that the choice of who she will be marry has been taken away from her so that he can use her to fix the political wounds he has caused; from this point forward, nothing Rhaenyra ever does will be enough for Alicent. Supplying heirs to the throne and Driftmark? Not enough- especially since Rhaenyra doesn’t assault her gay husband to do so. Acting as heir and putting forth wise, responsible suggestions in politics and problem-solving in the small council? Absolutely not, especially since in Alicent’s mind Rhaenyra has no business ruling over the men in the Small Council. Ruling from the heir’s seat of Dragonstone in preparation for the throne? Not enough. Offering apology when the poison that Alicent has been feeding her children about Rhaenyra and her children causes a fight between the children where her son is injured after throwing around death threats and claimed a dragon without the King’s leave (which IS established to be necessary in Jaehaerys’ reign) Not enough- she must have Lucerys’ eye as well. From this point on, *nothing Rhaenyra can or will do will ever be enough.*

And the irony is that her own hypocrisy never takes herself into account. She uses a dress to declare war at a wedding; insulting the Velaryons and her stepdaughter, and she faces no consequences for doing so, nothing for the disrespect- but only Rhaenyra ‘never’ faces consequences, right? Criston Cole murders a knight of the kingdoms and strikes the future king-consort to the Kingdoms- and Alicent protects him from every consequence, brings him into her own household as her own sworn knight.

In essence; young Alicent is a victim of the Faith, the Patriarchy and the men around her; but all of the seeds for the abuser that she becomes are there. She’s a hypocrite, blind to anything that doesn’t fit the narrative she wishes for, and to a degree, very narcissistic, and not as clever or as powerful as she thinks she is.

Mind you her being self-serving or self-absorbed isn’t some unforgivable crime; but in juxtaposition to how Rhaenyra expresses concern and care for her at multiple points, it just sits very poorly, for me.

Moving on;

Alicent, when younger is… Deeply interesting, deeply flawed, and incredibly tragic. Her younger self sets the stage for how her story ends; (SPOILERS) with her outliving all her children and grandchildren, all of them dead for her grudges and ambition, with her mad and alone.

She’s also, in some ways, very clever; she’s observant, knowing much of the court gossip, even potentially dangerous secrets in e.1 (speaking of that one Lady’s ‘swollen belly’ aka suspected pregnancy). She’s very duty-oriented, though mostly because she wants to be rewarded for how dutiful she is. She’s subservient to the men around her due to how Otto uses her, and short-sighted. I don’t think she’s a particularly kind individual, but I think she did have the POTENTIAL to be kind. She’s a little boy-obsessed- she was confirmed to have had a crush on Daemon and on Criston, plus how she viewed the courtship tour as ‘romantic’, but she’s also so obsessed with Rhaenyra that it blinds her to the truth both of herself and of Rhaenyra- obsessed with an image of Rhaenyra that isn’t actually the truth. She takes solace in her Faith, it seems, more than anything else, and she struggles to connect to people around her in meaningful ways. She has moments of deep insight- such as how she told Rhaenyra that any effort in hers and Viserys’ relationship would have to come from Rhaenyra, as Viserys, a man, is useless to ‘the language of girls’. She doesn’t like risks (no interest in flying with Rhaenyra) or adrenaline, and likely pursues only more ‘feminine’ pursuits- canonically we know Rhaenyra loves to ride horses and to fly Syrax, to hawk and hunt, loves fashion- even in the book I’d say Rhaenyra is a ‘fashionable’ tomboy in a lot of ways. But we don’t really know.. ANY hobbies of Alicent’s. We don’t know her passions, we don’t know her interests outside of the Faith and the ambitions of her family.

We don’t know her relationships with her children or motherhood- though we know she’s jealous of what a good mother Rhaenyra is.

Honestly it’s a shame. S1 really needed to be 20 eps- 10 with the younger versions of Alicent and Rhaenyra, and 10 with the older. It would’ve let us KNOW the characters more and get far more invested in their fates.

Anyways this… is a novel. But I hope I answered your question alright lmao. I think Alicent as a character is very interesting- but good lord I don’t like her, and yeah I didn’t like her younger version either.