#⤥ Mairu Answers !

[whats-it-mean]

can we as a fandom talk about how fucking pretty shidou's entire family is. like no why the HELL do they all look like mf MODELS??? HELLO?? I HAVE QUESTIONS

[purgatory-is-life]

Mechtober prompt 20/day 20-Crew Night

soft mechs rights. as a treat

@mechtober-2024

One (Mostly) Violence Free Night - Reality666Rift999 - The Mechanisms (Band) [Archive of Our Own]

tw; jonny shoots ivy in the head at one point, a little bit of out angst, marius breaks his arm very briefly and it's not described, i think that's it! lmk if there's something u need me to tag!

---

Lyfrassir was knitting themself a blanket, definitely-not-hiding in their room, when a knock sounded from their door.

They definitely didn’t jump and nearly throw their entire blanket half-way across their room. That did not happen.

They got up, carefully setting their project down on their bed, before walking over to their door and sliding it open part way. “Yes?”

It was Ashes, the quartermaster smirked up at them and raised an eyebrow, a cigarette between their fingers. “Hey Doll,” Ashes said.

“Hello, O’Reilly.” Lyfrassir raised an eyebrow. “Is there something you need?”

“It’s Crew Night,” they said, in lieu of explaining.

“…Okay? And what does that have to do with me, O’Reilly?”

Ashes rolled their eyes, taking a drag of the cigarette. “C’mon,” they stated, gesturing with their head. “We better get going.”

“Wh- I thought I made it clear I did not want to engage in any criminal activity while I was aboard.”

Ashes snorted. “We’re in deep space, sugar. The only criminal activity available is killin’ each other, and that’s practically half the entertainment we have. It’s not anythin’ illegal. Just c’mon, I think you’ll like it.” Ashes started walking away, and Lyf was content to just return to their room, but Aurora jerked their door open the rest of the way.

Lyfrassir huffed, trying to pull it closed. It didn’t budge, Aurora beeping at them incessantly.

“Would it help if I called this mandatory?” Ashes called back to them. Lyf sighed.

“Fine. Just let me get some of my knitting things.”

“O’course, we all gotta find ways to keep our hands busy. Aurora will show you to the right common room!” and Ashes disappeared around a corner. Lyfrassir sighed, and walked into their room to grab their half-finished blanket. Aurora beeped and creaked excitedly. Lyf raised an eyebrow, but continued on their way to this alleged ‘Crew Night’.

Aurora’s lights blinked and flashed, leading the former inspector down a twisting and winding hallway. Lyf followed, as Aurora hummed excitedly.

Eventually they arrived at the designated common room, to find the Mechanisms… making some kind of pillow fort. Brian and Raphaella were making a nest with the blankets, covering the floor with them–the floor that was already made up of mostly plush mats. Marius was on Tim’s shoulders in an attempt to hang up blankets, while Jonny was on Ashes’s shoulders doing the same thing. The Toy Soldier and Ivy were holding piles of snacks while Aurora cycled through movies on a large screen.

“…What’s going on?” They asked. Marius turned around, which did not seem to be safe–considering he fell off Tim’s shoulders doing that.

“Lyf! Hi!” he shouted excitedly, before breaking his flesh-arm from falling down. “Motherfucker!” Mairus screeched.

“You didn’t answer my question,” Lyfrassir sighed.

“It’s Crew Night, dumbass,” Jonny said. He glanced down at Marius. “The hell were you thinking, idiot? How the fuck did you even hurt yourself in this room? It’s mostly pillows.”

Marius just flipped the first mate off.

Lyfrassir huffed in annoyance. “Yes, I’ve been told it’s Crew Night already. What the fuck does that mean?”

“Did Ashes and Aurora not explain to you yet?” Ivy raised an eyebrow as the Toy Soldier started pouring cups of tea. Lyf shook their head. Ivy sighed, and turned to Ashes. “I thought I asked you to explain when you went to get them.”

“I did explain,” Ashes grinned widely.

“You just said that it was ‘Crew Night’!” Lyf argued.

Ivy sighed again. “Crew Night is basically just a day we pick at random where we all get together and relax, often with movies but sometimes we do other activities. One night we attempted to bake together, however that… did not end well. So we mostly stick to movie nights.”

“Oh…” Lyf hummed. “Alright.”

“Find a seat anywhere! We’re almost done setting up!” Raphaella called excitedly. She chirped as she tucked a blanket into a ball amidst the nest. Lyf nodded, and sat down on one of the ends of the nest, getting comfortable with their knitting again as the Mechanisms flitted about putting the finishing touches on their pillow nest. The Toy Soldier ran over and offered them a oil-black, rainbow stained teacup with what smelled like jasmine tea inside it.

“Navigator Lyf! I’m Glad You Were Able To Join Us For Crew Night. Tea?”

“Oh, uh, sure, Toy Soldier. Thank you,” Lyf took the cup and nodded to the wooden doll with a small smile on their face.

“It Has Been A Long While Since We’ve Had A Crew Night,” The Toy continued, “So It’s Nice That We’re Able To Share It With The Newest Member Of Our Crew. Do You Have A Movie Preference? Ivy And Aurora Should Be Able To Find Any Movie You Want Amidst Their Collective Data Banks!”

“Oi, it’s my turn to pick a movie!” Jonny shouted. He’d climbed off of Ashes’s shoulders, but was still draped across them like they were the only thing keeping him standing.

Ashes rolled their eyes. “Jonny, Doll, it’s only fair if you let the newbie pick.”

“They haven’t even participated in the rights fights!”

“They’re also breakable. If they did, they’d probably die.”

“They’re also right here,” Lyf rolled their eyes. They returned to their conversation with The Soldier, blowing on their tea to try and cool it off. “How long has it been since you’ve had one of these? I’ve been here about a year by now, and I don’t remember you ever doing this.”

“Oh, Goodness Me, I Can’t Seem To Recall!” The Toy Soldier pretended to think for a moment. “I Believe– Oh My, Has It Really Been Since Nastya?” the wooden thing pretended to get sad for a moment, turning away from Lyf. “My, That’s Quite A Long While… No, Surely We’ve Done It Since? I Just Can’t Quite Remember! How Odd…”

“It has been approximately four hundred and thirty-seven years since our last Crew Night,” Ivy said, walking over and placing her tray of snacks next to Lyf. “The last one was shortly, about a century or so, after Nastya went Out. So–”

Ivy didn’t get to continue whatever it was she was planning on saying, as Jonny had shot a bullet clean through her skull.

“Jonny!” Ashes snapped, yanking his gun away from him. “No death on Crew Nights! That’s literally the only rule!”

“Well she broke a rule too!” Jonny growled. “She- wh-…” Jonny’s voice trailed off as Brian picked him up by the scruff. The shortest of the Mechs went limp, eyes going wide as he stared at the floor.

“Air jail,” Brian said, “for your crimes.” Ashes laughed, lighting up a cigarette.

“Ivy was just tryna explain, Jonny,” Ashes said. “She coulda done it better, but it’s still Crew Night. Don’t shoot people just for pissing you off, or I’m taking your gun.”

Jonny grumbled, crossing his arms as his tail swished. Brian seemed satisfied though, and brought him over to the nest, depositing him in the middle and promptly wrapping him up in a blanket. Jonny glared up at the brass pilot, but the metal man just grinned and kissed Jonny on the forehead.

“Your beard’s scratchy,” Jonny mumbled.

“Oh my beard is scratchy?” Brian raised an eyebrow. “Not yours that you constantly refuse to take care of?”

“Mine isn’t made out of wire,” Jonny said. He wriggled and squirmed until an arm was free, and reached up to poke Brian’s face. “Yours is. And it’s scratchy.”

Brian rolled his eyes.

Lyf  took a sip of their tea, eyes darting around the room as the other Mechanisms started settling down. “It’s… odd to see you all being… nice to each other.”

“It is Crew Night,” Brian said, flopping down in the nest next to Jonny, the other immediately curling up into him. “So we’re a bit kinder to each other.”

“You know, the more you say it, the less meaning it has to me,” Lyfrassir declared.

“Now you’re getting it!” Tim called, fae grinned widely which only worked to further confuse Lyf.

“That- what does– that doesn’t even make sense in this context.”

“Exactly,” Tim said, taking Jonny’s other side. Fae draped an arm across Jonny’s shoulders, playing with the first mate’s hair. “We don’t make sense and it’s best if you just roll with it.”

Ivy stood up, brushing her skirt off, and doing her best to get blood out of her shirt. “You don’t make sense. I happen to be very logical. Is Marius alright?”

Raphaella chirped and walked over the ball that was currently the not-a-baron. She whacked him with a wing. “Mari, we have to start,” the winged scientist whined.

“My arm hurts,” Marius whined back, from his ball. “I’m not moving for five hundred years.” Raph chirped again, more frustratedly, and picked him up in order to deposit him in the slowly forming cuddle pile. As the violinist unfurled from his ball, Lyf could see that his arm was, in fact, healed. Lyfrassir rolled their eyes at them.

Marius crawled into Brian’s lap and Ashes sat by Tim, putting faer head in their lap to play with faer hair. The Toy Soldier jumped up from its spot next to Lyf and wormed its way into the pile wherever it could fit. Raph laid across as many of the other Mechs as was physically possible, which was an endeavor aided by her wings. Ivy joined as well, sitting a bit towards the edge of the pile but close enough to snuggle up next to Ashes and Tim. Lyf watched in mild confusion as the Mechanisms created, perhaps, the most chaotic pile of living human bodies that ever existed.

This was… Not their initial impressions of the Mechanisms.

They were rude, violent, loud, and murderous. They killed without hesitation, they killed each other without hesitation. They destroyed planets, conquered them and then left them to burn because they simply got bored. The worst criminals to ever exist, and they’d only continue to exist and cause more destruction. And yet, here they were.

Cuddling and clinging on to each other like their immortal lives depended on it, about to watch a movie with each other. It was strange, an oxymoron to their very beings.

‘I have pulled up the selected movies for tonight :] If you would like to suggest one, Lyfrassir, you may as well :]’ Aurora wrote out, taking up most of the big movie screen with the words.

“Oh, I’m alright, Aurora…” Lyf said, shrugging. A thumbs up appeared on the screen, and it went dark with a purple loading circle appearing in the center as the lights dimmed.

Lyfrassir took another sip of their tea, before carefully setting it down and resuming their knitting. They weren’t going to complain about the behavior shift, if it got them some peace and quiet.

About half way through the first movie, Lyfrassir dozed off, and when they woke up again they’d somehow gotten dragged into the cuddle pile by–seemingly–Ivy and The Toy Soldier. Lyfrassir sighed, rolling their eyes. Aurora was creaking quietly and the lights were dimmed lower than they had been earlier, signifying Aurora being asleep. Lyf sighed, and curled up, returning to sleep. Just this once, they’ll allow it. It certainly helped that Ashes made a great pillow.

[linkspooky]

um... hello

i’ve been wondering how did you go about characterizing Nanako and Mimiko?

i’m slowly going through your jujutsu kaisen fanfics, michikatsu has my heart, and I’m surprised how well you wrote nanako and mimiko in exponential growth so far.

were some of it headcannon? or did you come to those characterization conclusions based on what was shown in the manga?

Thank you for your nice words about my fanfics. Nanako and Mimiko were a pretty big reason for why I started wanting to write fanfic of jujutsu kaisen, because number one Geto's family is the most interesting thing about him as a character and how he contrasts with Gojo, and number two they're crimminally underutilized in canon. I also found their deaths unnecessarily gratuitous. It was a start of a long series of Gege wasting female characters.

Which is why I wanted to explore them more in fic, and also just explore the idea of Geto's found family. As for where I came up with the idea for their characters, I'll answer below the cut.

There were enough hints in canon about Nanako and Mimiko's cursed techniques that I was able to extrapolate what each of them did, voodoo dolls that force others to commit suicide and cursed photography. I also took a little inspiration from their character designs, Mimiko is obviously meant to be the dark / gloomy one, whereas Nanako dresses like a Gyaru. The fact that they're always near each other / clutching each other hints to a bit of a codependent relationship as well.

However, the rest of their characterization I basically had to make up. The biggest source of inspiration for them comes from Durara!! which is another urban fantasy series by Ryoga Narita, which deals with a bunch of supernatural creatures like dullahans, and vampires existing in an urban setting. I draw a lot of inspiration from Durarara!! because a big thing that Ryoga Narita writes well is having loads and loads of characters share screen time in a bigger story which is something I want to accomplish for Jujutsu Kaisen and it's huge cast. Especially since the aim of my fanfic series is to focus the spotlight more on the minor characters as opposed to the main trio.

Ryoga Narita is pretty famous for his eccentric characters, all of them are crazy in their own special way. One of the ways he manages to balance so many characters is each of them kind of has a gimmick or central concept they're based around. Mimiko and Nanako take a lot of inspiration from Izaya's little sisters, Mairu and Kurui.

Mairu and Kurui are based around the trop of "twins having opposite personalities", but it's a parody of that trope because they're doing it on purpose. Basically, the story is that when they were younger their older brother Izaya emotionally abused them by saying that if they were twins and the same person one of them should kill themselves because they had an extra. (Izaya is a lovely person by the way). They wanted to please their brother, so they decided to write all their personality traits down on a list and then divide them equally. Their theory is that by balancing out their strengths and weaknesses between each other they create the "ultimate human being."

Kurui decided to be the quiet one who's eccentric at school, like a Rei Ayanami expy, she wears her gym clothes to the middle of class and doesn't socialize with anoyone. Mairu decided to be the loud, attention hungry, eccentric one. She screams to everyone the first day of class that she's bisexual and willing to date multiple partners. When a bunch of girls try to bully her, she literally almost forces them to swallow thumb tacks. Kurui barely talks, and Mairu does all the speaking for her.

The twist is that they're intentionally doing that, it's an act for both of them. When they're texting people, or when they're in an online chatroom Kurui becomes the talkative one and writes in paragraphs, while Mairu gives one word responses. Which suggests that at any time they could just swap personalities. Both of them also consider themselves the same person, they want to date the same guys, and if they disagree on anything they have mental breakdowns.

So Nanako and Mimiko share the same central concept, but the thing is while I love Kurui and Mairu and their character concept is excellent they literally have no character development in the story they are in. They're never challenged over the fact that they are super codependent and can't exist without each other. They never really grow past the trauma of the emotional abuse that their brother inflcited on them. It seems like a subversion of the "twins with the same personalities" trope at first, but then they don't really go anywhere with it. Also, there's a lot of icky twin incest subtext between the two of them. They just legit kiss once because light novels are gross sometimes.

The closest the two of them get to character development is their relationship is the friendship both of them make with Aoba Kuronuma.

Aoba is a first year student introduced in the second half of the story, he's basically a foil for their older brother Izaya. He's like an Izaya who's less of a villain because he's younger and capable of making friends. A lot of his positive character traits come out in his relationship with the twins, because while he's a selfish user of people he tends to be really selfless and protective when it comes to them.

This could have been a jumping board for having the twins have separate identities, because they are both friends with him, but Aoba has romantic feelings for Kurui. However, they do the twin incest thing again because the first time Kurui isses Aoba, Mairu is like "I have to kiss everyone my sister kisses" and then kisses him immediately afterwards and says it's an indirect kiss with Mairu.

There's a sequel to Durarara! called, Durarara! SH!. The trio shows up in that novel, but the original plan for that series was to make Aoba the main character with the Kurui and Mairu as the other parts of the main trio. However, that was scrapped in favor of three new characters which I thought was a pretty big waste of their potential.

A lot of the things I wanted to see in the Aoba / Kurui / Mairu trio, I put into Exponential Growth for the Junpei / Mimiko / Nanako dynamic. Basically the whole idea that after meeting Junpei, Mimiko and Nanako's relationship can't remain the same because it used to be their whole world was just the two of them but there's suddenly this third person their own age they both want to socialize with. Also, the two of them can't both date him so he forces them to actually act like individuals.

My trajectory with Nanako and Mimiko comes from what I wanted from Kurui and Mairu which is this deconstruction of the idea that they're the same person, by separating them and forcing them to learn to be their own people. Also, the sheer amount of distress it would cause a pair of twins this codependent to be forced to separate and live on their own. Because they're at that time in adolescence where they're going through some major changes in personality so the coping mechanism that worked for them as kids is starting to break down.

The other major inspiration for them is Maki and Mai. The basic premise is that they have the opposite relationship that Maki and Mai do, but it's just as unhealthy. Maki and Mai are permanently separated from their childhood closeness, because Maki always pushes Mai away. Maki needs to assert herself as an individual. However, this need is so strong that she doesn't think she can have any kind of relationship because she views it as a chain dragging her down.

Whereas, Mimiko and Nanako have been clinging to each other since childhood. They have the relationship that Mai basically WANTS to have with Maki. However, Maki thinks they're utterly pathetic because they can't survive on their own and are entirely dependent on each other. Which is Maki's unhealthy and toxic ideal of strength. At the same time, Mimiko and Nanako think that Maki just plain hates Mai. They can't imagine a sister ever completely ignoring another sister and pushing her out of her life because they value family more than anything else. As unhealthy as they are, at least Mimiko and Nanako make it clear they both love each other.

There's also another foiling point where they are both equally bad at communication with one another. Mimiko and Nanako claim they're the same person, and share the same thoughts on everything but Mimiko is constantly bullied by Nanako. Nanako's extremely bossy and domineering in the relationship. However, it's enabled by Mimiko who's been depending on Nanako too much over the years to make all the decisions for them. They also talk a lot but rarely talk about their true feelings with one another and when they start to it turns into an argument.

On the other hand, Maki and Mai could probably clear up a lot of tension between them with ONE HONEST CONVERSATION, but neither of them are willing to do that.

[chickensoup-4-mysoul]

herculean (drrr x f!reader) - chapter 21

Chapter 21 - Wolf in No Clothing

synopsis: a pleasant day out quickly takes a turn for the chaotic once shizuo and izaya cross paths.

word count: 2,265

warnings: canon-typical violence

"weep for yourself, my man, you'll never be what is in your heart weep little lion man, you're not as brave as you were at the start,, little lion man - mumford & sons

Setton: Feels like it’s been forever since I’ve had a day off Setton: Anyone have plans, today? Sora: Just getting lunch with a friend! Taro Tanaka: I’m going to see a movie. Saika: Really? So am I. Byakura: Sounds like you guys are hooking up! Sora: Perhaps….an unprecedented reunion? O_O

Kanra has entered the chat.

Kanra: Hello, everyone! Your dear friend is here! Taro Tanaka: Hello there! Saika: Hi Setton: Hey! Sora: ‘ Sup! Byakura: Die Kanra: Byakura’s as hard-hearted as ever! Kanra: Anyways, have you guys heard? Sora: What a surprise. Kanra: Yuuhei Hanejima got a death threat! Taro Tanaka: The actor? Kanra: Yup! The internet’s going crazy over it! Sora: Must be another prank, right? Setton: Anyways, since tomorrow’s a day off, let’s have fun!

...

Next time you saw Mairu and Kururi, you’d have to personally apologize.

“Your brother is freaking Yuuhei Hanejima!!?? ”

“His name’s Kasuka, but yeah.”

With all of the chaos, it had been a while since you and Shizuo could hang out. When you invited him out, he had agreed—as long as you didn’t mind him stopping to see his brother. Of course, you had no issue. In fact, a part of you was curious to meet the guy. Shizuo obviously thought highly of him, and it had you thinking. What was he like? Did they act similarly? Did they look similar?

Imagine your surprise when he stops you both after getting burgers and goes “there he is”—and points at Yuuhei Hanejima.

Shizuo's brother was a famous actor? How does that even happen--and how hasn't he mentioned it. Thinking back to their physical similarities, you have half a mind to pinch yourself. Yeah, they looked similar, but the idea just seemed too ridiculous.

Said man was at the center of a crowd, making a spectacle for the camera as he interviewed random onlookers. Even from a distance, you could make out his sweeping movements and energy. He certainly had a presence for the camera. His behavior was definitely contrasting to Shizuo's. The two of you simply stood in the distance, watching. Is this what he meant by seeing? Looking back at Shizuo, you note the pure admiration adorning his features. 

"You're really proud of him, aren't you?" You elbow him with a grin, chuckling at how the admiration is replaced by brief confusion.

"Well, yeah." He answers like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

He seemed so sweet like this. Just another thing that solidified how human he was to you. It was obvious how much he cared for his brother. It brought warmth to your heart and pride to witness such a moment. There’s some space in the crowd and you get a better view of Yuuhei--Kasuka in action. He was interviewing another couple. It was hard to make out from the distance, but they seemed young. If you squinted you could make out glasses and a color block jacket….

Wait.

Just as you comprehend the familiar faces, unrest washes over the crowd. The air was suddenly filled with frightened yelling. What was going on?

From the chaos, a man appears, tall and mighty among the small, cowering forms of onlookers. The glint of his knife, brandished high, is visible from you. The circle that forms around them gives you a clear view. The man is clearly unhinged, bearing an oddly crooked stance as he growls something at Kasuka. Your breath hitches as he advances on Kasuka, who stands only centimeters away from Anri and Mikado. 

Kanra: Yuuhei Hanejima got a death threat

Shoot. You had forgotten about that. Writing the threat off as a foolish prank, the whole situation left your head as quickly as it had entered. So quickly, that you didn't even think to mention the whole ordeal to Shizuo. Guilt floods your conscience as your eyes dart in his direction. However, you find no one standing in his place. A gust of wind brushes your cheeks as something rushes past you. The giant object soars through the air--flying, flying, flying….

Slamming right into the assailant.

Mortified silence developed into busy, confused chatter. Above that chatter, the sound of panting stuck out to you--the panting coming from behind you. Eyes wide as saucers, you turn to see your heaving companion. His legs are bent in a wide stance, energy still surging through them after an adrenaline-fueled throw. Further off to the side, you see the poor storefront of the burger joint you had just visited, now missing a large, light-lined sign. Welp. Wonder who did that.

Regaining his breathing, Shizuo simply walks off in another direction, not even bothering to take in the aftermath of his actions. You, however, still have your eyes glued to spectacle. As you go to follow him, your neck cranes to see the sight for as long as you can. Among the scurrying civilians, your eyes lock with another’s.

Kasuka stares back at you. He seems oddly unperturbed, given the previous events. Mesmerized by the blank expression on his face, you return his gaze until the very last second that you have to walk away. You follow Shizuo silently, taking in his heavy footsteps and the tension in his shoulders. Nothing seemed like the right thing to say, so you just continued to walk with him. As the two of you walked further, you could hear a voice in the distance. A high-pitched, youthful voice. A familiar voice.

“Yuuhei!! Yuuhei!!’

You rounded a corner and, when you saw the Orihara twins hanging from a truck by their hoodies, your jaw dropped. 

“Let us down, Shizuo,” Kururi pleads as the man approaches.

You watch as he reaches up, grabs them by the hood, and lifts them from the truck. Just as you think he’s about to put them down, he turns, carrying them over to a nearby building….then tosses them through an open door. In one fell swoop, he shuts the door and proceeds to push an entire vending machine in front of it. You can only gape as he leans back on the wall behind him.

“Wha- Shizuo, what on earth are you doing?” That seemed kind of mean. The sound of them yelling only bothers you further. Why would they need to be shut in like that--they were just two silly young girls…

“If you needed privacy to snog your girlfriend, you could’ve just asked! We can cover our ears!”

...on second thought, some people needed a bit of a time out. Still, you eye the man incredulously as he lights and takes a drag of a cigarette. Seems like he was really on edge--seeing someone threaten your brother’s life will do that to you, you guess. The shrill ringing of a cellphone cuts through the silence. Shizuo pulls his phone from his pocket and raises it to his ear.

You can’t hear whoever had called him, but the sound of their voice seems to take Shizuo off guard, his eyes widening. However, the surprise is quickly overtaken by hostility.

“So, who was that weirdo? Why’d you go out of your way to tell me that my brother was in danger?”

So he knew this would happen to Kasuka? Whoever was on the other line, there was no good will in Shizuo’s relationship with them. All you can make out is the static opening and closing of vowels and consonants. However, a sound in the distance causes you to zero in on your surroundings. The longer you listen, the closer the sound gets, and the more it seems to line up with the static voice in Shizuo’s cellphone. Someone was coming--whoever was calling Shizuo was coming. Your eyes shift back to the man, who is thoroughly engrossed in the phone call.

“And he just happened to be in Ikebukuro, right? And he just happened to be in the area--just happened to have a knife? Bullshit.”

The man who had attacked Kasuka...did this person have something to do with it as well?

“You’re pretty sharp...you really are an animal.” The voices line up clearly, perfectly. So clear, the person could be standing right in front of you.

They are right in front of you. Shizuo’s head suddenly snaps in a different direction, eyes boring daggers. Following his gaze, your heart stops. 

He somehow managed to look the same every time you saw him; wolfish grin and predatory eyes. Izaya returned Shizuo’s glare, taunting him. You suddenly feel as though you’re standing in the middle of an open warzone. Briefly, the image of a flying traffic sign comes to mind. 

“You’re correct--I told him Yuuhei’s schedule. I figured that if your brother was in danger, you’d come.”

Suddenly, your ears are ringing with the alarms that went off in your head. The men’s mouths are moving--but you’re too preoccupied to focus on their words. Your brain was too busy calculating, crunching the numbers; trying to figure out what the heck is going on.

You’re not especially perceptive, and the previous absence of Izaya’s half of the conversation did not help; Even then, it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out.

That Izaya had purposely attempted to endanger Shizuo’s brother.

You ran so many scenarios through your head--rationalizing, justifying, searching through any possible defense, but there was really no spinning it. He knew someone wanted to kill Yuuhei. He gave them his location. He encouraged them to kill him.

What if Shizuo hadn’t been there? What if he had looked away and missed that split second that the man approached Kasuka? What if someone else had gotten hurt, or worse, killed?

Izaya would be responsible for it.

Izaya would be a murderer.

Said man moves abruptly, sharply. With a flick of his arm, he sends something shiny flying in Shizuo’s direction. You yelp, panic flooding your senses as the small blade shoots through the air. To your astonishment, the projectile is caught between Shizuo’s teeth, then promptly grinded into pieces. This was insane. It felt as though you had only blinked, and they were off--leaving you in a cloud of dust. You had never paid witness to one of their fights. The one time you got close, you ended up in a doctor’s apartment. You wonder if that’s why you’re still glued in place. Who's to say that you, or someone else, wouldn’t get hurt?

Perhaps Shizuo would take the care to watch out, but Izaya? It only now occurred to you what that man was capable of.

“Shizuo…? Are you still there?”

The juvenile voice momentarily distracts you from your own growing feeling of dread. If Shizuo was this preoccupied, there’s no way he’s going to remember to let Mairu and Kururi out. You sigh, returning to the door behind which they were enclosed. Leaning your entire body against the vending machine, you begin to push with all your might. To your surprise, it’s fairly light, scooting over with little effort. You pull open the door to reveal Mairu and Kururi, who shield their eyes from the sudden influx of light.

“(Y/N)! You saved us! That settles it, you’ve officially moved up on my list,” Mairu confidently flashes a thumbs up. Kururi silently nods.

You’re not sure you even want to be on that list. Ignoring their shenanigans, you take off in the same direction Shizuo had. You had a really bad feeling.

It’s easy to follow the two’s trail, considering the carnage they’ve left behind. However, after a certain point, everywhere is carnage--or more accurately, littered with relocated street signs. You’re finally able to find your way back to the crowd of civilians, but it’s evident that more people have joined the fray; Yellow Scarves to be exact. 

Everything’s devolved into nonsense, honestly. Somehow, fists were pointed at each other, and a bunch of punks were brawling in the streets. It was causing enough mayhem to obscure the presence of Shizuo and Izaya. Narrowly dodging the flurries of limbs, you aimlessly search for at least one familiar face. Thoughts swirl through your head, straying into your central train and making it increasingly difficult to concentrate.

Anri and Mikado. Hey, looks like they’re on an outing together! How cute.

When did Celty get here?

Oh, there’s Mika. Wonder how she’s doing.

Angered shouting transforms into a confused panic. The multitudes of thugs fighting in the streets are...sinking? Squinting your eyes, you notice the black gunk collecting at their feet, pulling them downwards like quicksand. It was almost shadow-y, the way it misted and steamed. You swear you’ve seen it somewhere before…

Oh. Celty.

Silently thanking the headless woman, you take advantage of the sudden pause in action. With a clearer view of the area, you notice a path of dented buildings, leading further away from the heart of the crowd. Weaving your way through other onlookers, you scurry in that direction, fearful you may lose your path again.

It seems like every pedestrian was drawn to the commotion, clearing out the surrounding streets and walkways. Running down the empty sidewalk, the silence feels out of place following so much commotion. The only sound you can make out is someone else’s breathing, their brisk footfalls hammering against the pavement. The footfalls stop, outlived by the sound of panting.

Following the sound, you find yourself slipping into an alleyway between storefronts. Was someone hurt? Could it be…

Against your will, you’re already running all sorts of horrific scenarios. You brace yourself, poised to help and comfort whoever it could be that needed help--but when you rounded the corner, every protective instinct went out the window.

He didn’t deserve protecting, after all.

[pythonteeth]

OK HIEEEE

tags from @facelessmaniac on their AMAZING art of Kotetsu

Her favorite dinosaur is the Velociraptor and her favorite color is is the muted purplish red her favorite juice is white grape juice she loves rabbits and desperately wants a pet rabbit but the answer is NO (at least until she hits 12 then shizuo surprises her anyway despite izaya still maintaining a solid 'no' on the subject) She does inherit Shizuo's strength and SOME of his temper, but she's much better at managing frustration (this is actually THANKS to shizuo and also izaya)

Oh also just in case I need to be very clear, my Izaya is ALWAYS ftm-nonbinary, I flip flop on Shizuo every so often but he is also always some flavor of trans in my head. In this particular one he's nonbinary but has a full time job so he's not worried about all that rn yfm

I don't want to clog the entire dash so I'll throw the rest under the cut :3

The CoParenting with Izaya Orihara au completely overturns the spin off series BUT I named it this particular way because of the spin offs. I wanted it to have a similar vibe but an obviously different timeline!

I did a little bit of number crunching based off of Izaya's stabbing, since I'm pretty sure it's the last solid date we get in the main series. So if we assume that Izaya on or around his birthday hooked up with Shizuo at some point and then later got stabbed. Hospital, and then into Ketsu and the final curtain arc.

I'M ALSO slowly but surely chipping away at a fic for this, fine details and all that, as it's been slowly gaining interest since I started doodling it every so often. :3

oh oh bonus! I had help deciding on her name from a friend of mine on twitter! (check out his merch and etsy store btw for shizaya stuff!!!!)

Orihara Kotetsu / 折原 虎鉄 虎 - tiger 鉄 -iron/blades

we were chatting about it and tbqh I fell in LOVE with this particular suggestion from him

Anyway, by the time the final curtain arc happens and Izaya wakes up out of Tokyo he'd find out he's being given the option to move forward or terminate the initial pregnancy, he'd be about 6-8 weeks in, give or take an extra week. This would be the earliest possible sign, and truthfully despite all of the bodily trauma it's early enough on that it could really go either way for him if he decides to move forward.

Which, he does. Inexplicably. As in he can't really say for himself why he decides to keep her, something something "I can do it right this time" maybe. (snippet from the co-parenting fic draft)

In the fic I'm hinting at the beginnings of Sunset HOWEVER, the events change and ultimately he and Sozoro move into a more underground role in his work. i really wanted to work himari and haruto into this au but I have a slightly different one where instead he and shizuo coparent THEM instead of Izaya having Kotetsu so don't worry there's more than one! in fact, the initial beginnings of sunset are what instead implore him to start reaching out to shizuo (albeit anonymously) about their daughter

Over the course of each trimester he sends Shizuo physical copies of ultrasounds yada yada, all anonymously as well. He still has that PTSD response, and he's still in a wheel chair. The final fight was a lot for him, it will always be a lot for him. But fuck he can't keep this child from Shizuo forever. he doesn't want to. In a perfect world this all went so differently.

But then she's born! and she's beautiful and Izaya knows that Shizuo's hair isn't naturally blond but it's not until he's holding her and he realizes "oh he's not blonde. I've never seen his natural hair before." and when Kotetsu's hair starts growing Izaya wonders if she got Shizuo's natural hair color, it's lighter than Mairu and Kururi's hair. It's just him and Sozoro and this baby and then Nec comes into the picture as a sort of secretary (this will be detailed in the fic)

Izaya continues to send Shizuo anonymous updates, the day she's born he sends one of those "congrats you're the father!" type cards something something Shizuo has started to look for them himself at this point.

EVENTUALLY he finds a way to contact Izaya back, and Kotetsu is roughly 6 months old when he finally does, to which Izaya concedes and reveals a location but remember he's still dealing with his trauma both physical and mental from the final fight. he's a bit better off and can walk a bit but still largely needs his chair if they're going out of the house. it will be good for kotetsu's other father to be in the picture!

They do not get together right away, tbh. It's probably the second slowest of burns I'm writing, but I can't smash them together like barbies in this like i'd like. In actuality Shizuo is not able to get close to Izaya at all, Izaya can't even look at him while he's wearing the bartender uniform. He needs to stay completely out of arms reach of Shizuo in order to have a conversation with him for the first few months. The closest they get is when Shizuo passes Kotetsu over to him before stepping back to make him feel safer.

It's really uh HARD and very hurt/comfort of me, but it is a slow burn where Izaya does pursue physical therapy if only for the sake of his daughter and finally they settle somewhere outside of Tokyo. Shizuo is not willing to leave his daughter behind so he stays nearby, eventually just moving in and slowly. Very slowly they get to a point where they are softly together.

Kotetsu inherits Shizuo's strength around 7/8 years old. Literally only finding out because they're trying to go somewhere and she's looking for her bunny stuffy (Mr. Usagi, btw. He's the first gift Shizuo was able to give her)

this is an unfinished comic of the moment

eventually izaya is at a point where he can use his cane more than the chair but there are still bad days where he needs his chair, so they never really get rid of it.

oof this has gotten so so sosososososososososo long and now I'm feeling shy again BUT please feel free to ask any and all questions about this particular au it's in my top 3 favorites of ones I've made. (the other 2 are pet sematary/see you on the other side + saika possession which I have mainly imagined in my noggin if ur curious)

I'm also still working on compiling things and making ACTUAL reference sheets for some of my characters + aus so that they're a little easier to find and read up on :')

Thank u everyone for ur interest in Coparenting with Izaya Orihara its uh...really personal to me specifically and definitely the closest one to my heart.

further art of her and some little comics can be found HERE on my art blog and my asks are open here and on my art blog if anyone has any questions :)!

Going to yap Abt kotetsu & co-parenting au today so watch out

[queen-of-bel]

drrr for the ask meme!

♡ Favorite Male: Izaya, hands down ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ) He’s actually my fave fictional character of all time! There’s something so refreshing about someone who thinks he’s a great big mastermind, but is actually the opposite. He’s smart enough to trick most people into thinking he can control everything, but not smart enough to actually know how to do it. 

"chuunibyou” type characters are the fastest way into my heart, and Izaya is certainly just that.

please don’t ask me how much i’ve spent on izaya merch it’s frankly embarrassing

♡ Favorite Female: Saki!! She deserved sm better than what she got in canon,,

♡ Favorite Pairing: can I say it’s me and tossing Narita into a garbage can? Hm, maybe Izaya and Namie but platonically? 

I always found this illustration from vol 9 pretty cute （*’∀’人）♥

♡ Least Favorite Character: Hooo boy. Masaomi, hands down. There aren’t enough words to describe how much I hate him.

♡ who’s most like me: For better or for worse, I have never related to a fictional character more than I have Izaya..... There’s a lot about his backstory, his fears and motivations, his behaviors that are just.... really relatable :   )

♡ most attractive: hahahahaha.....

♡ three more characters that I like: aoba, tsukumoya, and kuon! altho if we’re excluding SH and just sticking with the main 13 novels, i’ll say shingen

tangentially related, but i really do think that the drrr anime solely exists to spite me since they butchered izaya’s character into something horribly unrecognizable and then... tsukumoya, who??

it’s still baffling to me that the narrator of the entire series only gets a tiny reference in a measly little ova. that being said, i appreciate the heck out of dufufufu bc it was probably the only episode in the entire series that gave some izaya interactions that are aligned with novel canon:

thank you for asking!

send me a series and i’ll fill this out

[allxtherightplaces-a]

[Aoba; Mairu] “ you’ll be the death of me. ”

poetry sentence meme@florabled

“So I was right, right??? It’s true!! I hit it right on the head!”

Aoba’s exasperated tone doesn’t slow her down, Mairu’s grin widening until it was almost predatory skipping up closer to her friend’s personal space with ease. It was just the two of them, which was an abnormality in itself; seeing Mairu and Kururi without the other was almost as odd as seeing someone who wore black everyday walk in with the brightest white shirt.

Somehow, she had managed to separate momentarily from her sister while she was off doing a last minute thing, and she slinks up even closer, resting a arm casually on Aoba’s shoulder; the chesire cat smirk only widening.

“Don’t worry, you’re secrets safe with me, Aocchi. Although...” She leans back, just so she could peer into his face more directly. “-- If you don’t step up and tell Kuru-nee soon, I might have to take matters into my own hands~.”

[lost-into-the-depth-of-a-twist]

Ok, hear me out for a moment.

It's crossover time!

For those of you that doesn't know Durarara!!, please, go watch/read it because it's pure gold.

For those of you who actually know Durarara!!...

Just imagine the utter chaos that would be unfold if these four ever met.

Like...

Floyd and Mairu just running around causing havoc in their path while Jade and Kururi watch them in amusement while lightly chatting over a cup of tea.

I can very well picture Mairu jumping on Floyd's back and him starting to run at full speed with her hanging on his shoulder for her life, charging any poor student that happens to unfortunately end up in their path.

Also, Kururi casually suggesting Jade new ways to convince people to pay what they have to pay to Azul and quietly spraying pepper spray on both Floyd and Mairu's eyes when they team up to squeeze her because she's "just too cute".

Mairu going with Jade on a mountain trip because she just has too much energy to burn and since she's annoyingly curious she keeps bombarding him with questions after questions about mushrooms and everything new she sees and Jade enthusiastically answers everything because finally someone is showing some kind of interest in his club activities.

Floyd getting his ass beaten by Mairu on a daily basis and accepting to be her sparring mate because he wants to learn some karate moves.

The four of them have a group chat but it's mostly spam from Kururi and Floyd with some messages from Jade and a world or two from Mairu.

The Orihara twins dragging the tweels with them to fan meetings and such because they are two intimidating skyscrapers and are perfect to make the path clear for the shorter duo.

Night Raven College or Ikebukuro... Nowhere is safe!

Meanwhile Azul and Izaya see this combo and they are just

N O P E

[happyandticklish]

Durarara for the fandom ask thingiee?? 😍😍😍

I would literally be ecstatic to!! Anything to talk about my favorite anime~

The character I first fell in love with:

Weirdly, not Izaya. Shinra was my love that entire show, I would kill for him. Izaya and Shizuo came later, when I first started delving into content for it.

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now:

Shiki?? Like, I didn't think much of him in the beginning, but something happened man.

The character everyone else loves but I don't:

I never really got into Aoba. He's just kind of meh.

The character I love that everyone else hates:

I don't think I really have one?? I feel like I always have such disappointing answers for this specific question.

The character I used to love but don't any longer:

I used to really like the Raira Trio, but I've fallen away from them since watching the show.

The character I would totally smooch:

Izaya my love~ 🥰

The character I'd want to be like:

Fucking Celty. Hot, badass woman on a motorcycle with her geeky scientist husband and cool escapades? What more could you want in life?

The character I'd slap:

Also Izaya. I just feel like he needs one good slap, y'know?

A pairing that I love:

Ahhh, so many, but my top three would have to be Shizaya, Shinzaya, and Shincelty.

A pairing that I despise:

Mairu/Kururi. I hate when the only gay representation animes have is some weird incest thing.

Thank you for the ask!

[kemonous]

tag drop~

[whats-it-mean]

is it weird to get married in prison (having my wedding w fuuta in 3 days)

NO ITS NOT. THATS SO REAL OF YOU. I HOPE YOU AND FUUTA HAVE THE WONDERFULEST LIFE TOGETHER WISHING YOU THE BEST TREAT THE GAMER BOY WELL!!! have the most amazing super poggers wedding ever man

[glmfic]

hi!!! I love your fic (ghost hunters, lies & money) so so much!! oh and for the ask game, 🧑💎💡📒🎤 please. have a lovely day/night!

An ask? Aww, thank yoooou!!! :D

favorite character to write

Ooooh, good question! I love writing each member of our SPR team for different reasons, buuut... if I *had* to pick...I think I have the most fun writing Bou-san? He's just so spontaneous! His antics and wise cracks are just such a joy to incorporate into a scene. I feel like he springs to life in my head, and I'm just along for the ride. But then there's a side of him that's so passionate, and caring, and gentle...in case you can't tell, his dynamic with Mai is one of my very favorites to write <3 Ah, I have so much love for our Monk :)

fave trope to write

Ho ho ho, I'm a trope queen. You'll probably see them weaved all through my writing I hope you like tropes loool :D Picking one to rise above them all? Partners (work/school) to lovers. That “mutual pining” vibe is my thiiing. You know, they see each other everyday in a very ordinary way (or in some cases in very intense situations, like say...life or death ghost hunting? ^_^) and slowly grow accustom to each other, learn their likes/dislikes, their quirks...accepting them (you know you gotta work to make the partnership work right?), until they don't just accept them...they loooove them <3 They live in this “some” state: something is going on, but it's so quiet or fragile they don't name it. They just keep letting grow, and things like no-personal-space and “casual” touching start to happen. Oh wow. I could go on and on. But yes, partners to lovers. That's my ultimate trope I think! I mean: Mairu anyone? ;)

what inspires your fic ideas?

Oh gosh, I don't think I've ever been asked this? Good one! Let me think...well, inspiration alone can be very hard to come by. I have to say the reason my GLM chapters get put out is 90% because my readers inspire me to keep going, and when I'm in that “inspired” state...the ideas just seem to start flowing? It's so very hard-- for me at least-- to write without some sort of inspiration, either from my readers, or from the content it's self. That kind of leads me to the more conventional answer to this question: usually my ideas are inspired from the content I'm writing for. I love writing missing scenes or alternate scenes from canon-- especially in giving them a shippy angle/twist :) I love re-imagining whole storylines, or endings. I am a fix-it-fic kind of girl. Like make it as bad you want: I will make it better. With content I love, I always feel like the characters are living their lives behind the scenes...like there's always so much else to explore? Like canon is just a spring board-- and I'm ready to dive in deeper! That's why the style of GLM is like it is: it's a new “episode” to enjoy, a new case! I actually have many plot bunnies kicking around that are similar to GLM, more Ghost Hunt case fics-- I just love playing with “what if”...what if things had continued-- what would that look like for SPR? And of course, you can count on *my* what ifs always including shippy prospects :D Finally, inspiration for certain scenes, tropes, quotes, storylines, characters, ect... often those come from my consumption of all the swoony media I can get my hands on. Kdramas. Rom-com movies. Jane Austen. I'm a hopeless romantic.

any fics planned?

The short answer: yes! :D As I hinted above, I do have some plot bunnies that have been “haunting” (hahaha) me. They're Ghost Hunt plot bunnies, mostly case-fic that would be multi-chapter projects. But some shippy one-shots have also been winking at me, teasing me to write them (Mairu, Bou-san x Ayako, John x Masako *gasps*, Lin x Madoka). I have a document that I use to collect all my ideas, so that I can go back to them. For now, I'm trying to stay loyal to GLM. I write so slow, I'm afraid if I took some of that time to churn out one-shots...I may never get a new chapter out XD But anywho, yes I definitely have other fics planned. I hope once GLM is finished, you might continue with me on new writing adventures with our SPR team <3

fave line in a fic you wrote?

I'm blushing. I don't think I could pick a line? But I do have favorite scenes! Mainly Mairu ones, but some of those Mai and Bou-san ones...oh my gosh, I even crack myself up XD I'll round up some of my top faves for you:

Mai and Naru at the end of chapter 23. All that Mairu goodness after the “blood rain”, standing at the sink together...face-to-face arguing out of worry...oh,yeah. [chef's kiss]

Mai and Bou-san in chapter 11 & 12. Chicken and apples, need I say more? looool

Mai and Naru at the end of chapter 19 after Wise Obasan has locked them in Miss Miyuki's cellar...and Naru carries Mai out of the house (in front of the whole world!!), all the way to the Inn, and tops it off with admitting he gave Mai his moon lily. Dang. [fans self]

Naru's return in chapter 27. After such a long wait, he shows up at the end of chapter all disheveled and hot and like steals Mai's tea (indirect kiss!!) and then he and Mai have it out in the hall (just kiss already) and finally it looks like he's going to kiss her but oops he's actually fainting...

Ayako & Bou-san taking care of Mai while she was sick in chapter 20, oh gosh it always warms my heart I just love their family dynamic <333

Okay: throwing in a John!Masako moment here, but it really is one of my favorites. It's subtle, because of course, but also in chapter 23, the moment where John so gallantly throws himself over Masako during the “blood rain”, protecting her. Awwww!

More recently, the scene at the end of chapter 30 where Naru walks in on Mai's “séance” with Madame Miyuki. The intensity!! The english!! Oh maaan.

And finally, naturally-- the scene in chapter 31 where Naru nearly makes Mai flip out when he offers to “take it off” but haha it's just the tag on her dress, but then it's sad hours and Mai is crying, but don't worry because Naru wipes them away?! Ahhh the tenderness!!

Goodness wow I went overboard, but really just thank you for this ask! Your love and support means so much to me!! Really!!

[bunnyseahorse-blog]

Momentary Peace Chapter 29 preview :D

Izaya likes, and also simultaneously does not like, being alone in the dark.

If it’s in a quiet room with black out curtains, sure that’s fine and dandy. He can sit and sulk, and decide whether or not to come out until the sun rises, and he is forced to open the curtains, take his medication from the nightstand and wait until his body allows him to stand. Some nights Shizuo is there reading or snoring, and others he is already in the streets getting himself into trouble. His temper has returned with a venegence, and Izaya does not know how to free him from it.

 Being in the dark in their room is comfortable, he’s grown used to it. Izaya tells himself this much. He wears his sadness like his signature coat, it never left, as hard as he tried to shed it. It was like the creatures only Mairu could see no matter how hard he tried, she was struggling, and the baby growing in her could not handle the dose that would bring her relief.

 Izaya doesn’t like being in the dark in the sense that the city has became a stranger. He hasn’t been keeping up with everything as he should. He wonders things from time to time, things he used to know the answers to, and finds he no longer does.

 Who currently has Celty’s head?

 Why has Ruri been so quiet lately, what is she up to, is she still playing Hollywood?

 What were Kadota and the van gang up to? Were there any Dollar’s members left?

 What were Masami and Saki doing now that they have had their baby, why had he come to Izaya for work if he hated him so much?

  Other questions are newer, and to his surprise, he hasn’t pursued them like he should have.

 Why had Mikado asked to be slashed, and why had Anri agreed, hadn’t she always hated that sort of thing?

 What was Namie’s true motivation for faking Shiki’s autopsy?

 Why had Vorona and Shiki really left Japan? What were they doing in Russia?

 What about Seiji, what was he up to? What happened the Pharmaceutical company?

 Who is the father of Mairu’s son? Was it really Aoba?

 The dark was fine for depression, black rooms were suitable for sorrow. However, the city of Ikebukuro had turned foreign, and he needed to know what was truly going on.

 Izaya dry swallows his medication, does his stretches, and buries his face in his hands.

 He rises, feeling his muscles protest, and holds onto the bed until his legs feel steady enough to walk on.

 Enough was enough. He needs to know what’s truly going on in his city.

[seeesame]

7, 22, and 29? °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

Thanku for asking <33

7: Have you ever watched an entire anime in one sitting?

I thought I must have—oh. I have watched Mairu in one sitting before, since someone was putting on a rewatch. Otherwise I tend to watch a lot of shows at once.

22: You get to have a harem of [6] anime characters of your choice, who do you choose?

I don't think I can non-awkwardly answer this question... I don't love that many characters

29: Has an anime’s fanbase ever made you hesitant to watch an anime?

I wouldn't say so—ACTUALLY YEA. If I weren't already a Love Live fan I would not start watching it, but as is I've dragged a fair few people in.

[queen-of-bel]

What do you think makes Izaya who he is?

my fave character of ever.. i actually moved cities a little bit ago and i didn't bring my novels with me, so i don't have direct quotes, but i will try my best to remember which novels stated what

I think there are five major things that influence Izaya's personality:

1. His parents were neglectful, which meant he had to essentially raise both himself and his sisters. It went about as well as you'd expect it to, and Izaya carries guilt over how his sisters turned out. He never got the support he wanted from his family, and he's pretty good at hiding how that's affected him, but there was an interesting scene at the end of... volume 9? Where Mairu and Kururi say that they'd be just a little sad if he died, and Izaya says something along the lines of "for once, you guys are saying things that make me happy to hear instead of your usual greeting of telling me to die".

2. Building on that, Izaya doesn't really know how to interact with people in general. A large reason is because he is actually just... really fucking weird. He likes to project this image of him being a diabolical mastermind who has everything under control, but that's far from true. He's charismatic enough to trick people into thinking that, but it's actually really easy to deal with Izaya. Just tell him he's full of shit lmao. Shinra says that he's a grown man who never grew out of the "middle schooler playing make-believe" mentality, and I don't think there's a better way to put it than that.

3. He's got a huge fear of death. Between meeting up with suicidal people to understand how the hell someone can actively want death, his "forever young" mindset, and trying to wake up Celty's head because he wants to know if there's an afterlife, death is something he fears greatly and his quest to find some kind of answer or sense of peace with the idea of death really motivates his actions throughout the novels.

4. The man drowns in self-loathing. Tsukumoya heavily implies that Izaya doesn't like himself, and there's plenty of moments in the novel that confirm that. He's a really lonely person, becoming upset when he doesn't get invited to parties, and hates holidays because he's jealous that everyone else has someone to spend it with. Of course, this loneliness is largely his own fault because again, he's a fucking freak. He is actively antagonistic and pushes people away because he's too scared to get hurt, probably going back to point 1 about him never having a proper support system. But of course, when you act like that, no one is gonna want to talk to you!!

It doesn't help that the ones Izaya considers "monsters" have a healthy and and thriving social life. If the monsters are able to have friends and Izaya isn't, then what does that make Izaya?

5. Alright, the biggest event that shaped Izaya's personality. Shinra's stabbing. Izaya may have been a weird kid, but that's nothing compared to whatever the hell Shinra was on. Izaya envied Shinra and tried to emulate him in a lot of ways, including adopting Shinra's twisted definition of "love".

When Shinra got stabbed, all Izaya wanted was to make Nakura pay. He had no idea that the school would sweep the stabbing incident under the rug. He very easily could have been expelled, and forced to become a dropout. Instead, he instinctively pushed through with this insane plan to take the fall for Nakura, and in exchange, make Nakura’s life a living hell and spend every day regretting what he did.

Like ?? What the fuck!! What kind of child does this!!

It's Izaya's one-sided friendship with Shinra that gives us the biggest glimpse into his true personality. Izaya can be very loyal and selfless to people he cares about. Izaya pretended to not care about Shinra’s condition after Adabashi attacked him, but only as “payback” for how coldly Shinra treated him after he was stabbed. Izaya couldn’t help but still care for Shinra, using Ran and Mikage to knock out Adabashi, break his leg, and bring him back to Izaya’s apartment, where he remained imprisoned for days.

But Izaya also really fucking sucks. His intentional detachment from everyone else also means that he has no real sense of empathy and he doesn't care about how his actions affect others.

He's really delusional, never coming to accept the fact that Shinra is not a friend of his. Shinra treated Izaya as a stepping stone to get closer to Celty, and I think Izaya knew that deep down but never wanted to admit it. He sadly comes to the conclusion that Shinra can't be considered his "best friend" anymore after he gets stabbed, to which Mikage points out that Shinra can't be considered a friend at all.

I think ultimately, Izaya is just the product of a bad environment and extremely self-destructive behaviors. He's certainly not the most morally bankrupt character in the series, but there is a lot wrong with him.

[vstranslations]

Norikiyo - What Do You Want? - Lyrics

song (spotify) Japanese/Romaji/English lyrics under the cut

*The music video on Youtube has English subtitles, but they are... not good. Hopefully these make more sense.

What do you want? What do you want?

間違いの始まりお互いに 指差し がなったって 抗うも この絡むもん 乗せ世界ってもんは回ちゃってる で、何かを今日責めても ただ自分ってもんすら嫌んなってく じょあ、恨むより許せたら？ せがむより愛せたら？

よく言うじゃん「世界は自由」 って言うけどどう？ 何マイルか 海の向こうじゃ争いも でも 俺には今日お金がいる 考える時間が要る 神様 見せてよ 案内図

もしも 飢えている人が いるんじゃ きっと 彼らは 今日パンが 要る もし 俺が 億万長者だったら 分けるかも 足んない分 って 綺麗な��を歌ったりする たまに 自分にがっかりする

じゃ何が理由？ 考える 犯した罪 とか 犯罪分 過去の俺に 三回 言う 「生きてること以外に何が要る？」

焼け野原に 建ったビル 昭和初期はどんな地図？ 昔もそう 金持ちも貧乏人も最期 死ぬ じゃどう生きる？って 今日 力むより 君に今会いに行く そこには大してない Reason ただ それぞれある言い分

ほら 愚かな僕らを乗せ回る この惑星はみんなの学校 でも 誰かを友と呼べず 踠いて探しているのさ答えを

間違いの始まりお互いに 指差し がなったって 抗うも この絡むもん乗せ 世界ってもんは回ちゃってる で、何かを今日責めても ただ自分ってもんすら嫌んなって行く じゃ、恨むより許せたら？ せがむより愛せたら？

What do you want? What do you want?

欲しいんだけど名案が　 知ってる？ねぇ旦那　　 裁判官や警官じゃねぇ スーパーヒーロー　 Hey Come Back 　 カビ生えてる正論なんかよりもハイになるモンが欲しい どの宗教だとか肌の色でもおれらどっちもどっち 賜りたいご静聴　戦車よりねぇちゃんに乗っかりてぇし 今原発じゃねぇ選択肢はねぇんか？　

愚かな僕らを乗せ周る この惑星はみんなの学校 でも「先生」ってそれを呼んでも　 未だ返事がもらえず迷子

What do you want? What do I want?

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What do you want? What do you want?

Machigai no hajimari otagai ni yubi sashi ga natta tte aragau mo kono karamu mon nose sekai tte mon wa mawachatteru de anika o kyou semete mo tada jibun tte mon sura iyan natteku jaa uramu yori yurusetara? segamu yori aisetara?

Yoku iu jan, sekai wa jiyuu tte iu kedo dou? nan mairu ka umi no mukou ja arasoi mo demo ore ni wa kyou okane ga iru kangaeru jikan ga iru kami-sama misete yo annaizu

Moshimo uerteiru hito ga irun ja kitto karera wa kyou pan ga iru moshi ore ga okuman chousha dattara wakeru kamo tannai bun

Ja nani ga riyuu? kangaeru hanshita tsumi toka hanzaibun kako no ore ni sankai iu ikiteru koto igai ni nani ga iru?

Yake nobara ni tatta biru showa shouki wa donna chizu mukashi mo sou kanemochi mo binbounin mo saigo shinu ja dou ikiru? tte kyou rikimu yori kimi ni ai ni iku soko ni wa taishitenai reason tada sorezore aru iibun

Hora orokana bokura o nose mawaru kono hoshi wa minna no gakkou demo dareka o tomo to yobezu mogaite sagashiteiru no sa kotae o

Machigai no hajimari otagai ni yubi sashi ga natta tte aragau mo kono karamu mon nose sekai tte mon wa mawachatteru de nanika o kyou semete mo tada jibun tte mon sura iyan natteku jaa uramu yori yurusetara? segamu yori aisetara?

What do you want? What do you want?

Hoshiin dakedo meian ga shitteiru? Nee danna saibankan ya keikan ja nee suupaa hiiroo hey come back kabi haeteru seiron nanka yori mo hai ni naru mon ga hoshii dono shukyou da toka hada no iro demo orera docchi mo docchi tamawaritai goseichou sensha yori neechan ni nokkaritee shi ima genpatsu ja nee sentakushi wa neen ka?

Orokana bokura o nose mawaru kono hoshi wa minna no gakkou demo sensei tte sore o yondemo imada henji ga moraezu maigo

What do you want? What do I want?

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What do you want? What do you want?

When problems start, we point fingers at each other We try to resist getting involved The world keeps spinning with us on it Even if you try to criticize something today, the only thing you’ll end up hating more is yourself What if we tried forgiving instead of holding grudges? What if we loved others more than we pressured them?

Everyone always says “the world is free” but is that really true? There’s wars happening a few miles away on the other side of the sea But today I just need some money I need time to think Gods, please show us your plans

If there’s starving people, they definitely need some bread today People sing empty words, sayin’ that if they were rich, they’d give others some of what they’re lacking Sometimes I’m disappointed in myself

What’s the reason for it? Think – is it the act of doing a crime, or the crime itself? I’ll say this 3 times to my old self: “What do you want besides just being alive?”

Buildings put up in the burned fields What did this place look like at the start of the Showa era? Rich or poor, we die all the same – it’s always been that way Instead of worrying over how I should live, I’m gonna go see you I don’t really have any deep reason I just have lots to say

You see, this world carrying every one of us idiots is everyone’s school But I’m struggling to find any answers, unable to call anyone a friend

When problems start, we point fingers at each other We try to resist getting involved The world keeps spinning with us on it Even if you try to criticize another thing today, the only thing you’ll end up hating more is yourself What if we tried forgiving instead of holding grudges? What if we loved others more than we pressured them?

What do you want? What do you want?

I want it, but I got no good ideas You have anything, man? Don’t need judges or cops; hey superhero, hey come back! I want somethin’ to get me high, not some old argument Doesn’t matter what religion we are or the color of our skin I just want peace and quiet; I’d rather ride a pretty woman than a tank Aren’t there any options besides nuclear power?

You see, this world carrying every one of us idiots is everyone’s school but if you call for a teacher, you’ll end up lost without a response

What do you want? What do I want?