#❮ lilith clawthorne / answered ❯ ━━ ❝ do i get extra credit ?

[missallanea-a]

@stardustedstories : « you'll never be worth anything! » [Belos to Lilith. ^^]

She FLINCHED back as if she'd been struck. May as well have been, all things considered : she had spent the better part of her adult life trying so damn hard to be perfect. The perfect student, the perfect teacher, the perfect representation of everything that he wanted her to be. She'd put every ounce of herself into being the perfect Coven Head, at the sacrifice of everything : her morals, her beliefs, her sense of self, her family...

"I... I..."

It was no secret what she had done. That she had gone directly against his orders, that she had sacrificed all she had worked and strived and cheated for in order to save her sister. Did she really think she could just betray the Emperor and not have to actually face him ever again?

( For a minute there, yes, she had actually been thinking that might be the case. )

He's no less frightening and powerful when only in image. From the first moment he appeared on her crystal ball, she'd considered hucking the damn thing out the nearest window, but figured Edalyn wouldn't exactly appreciate her new roommate moving in and immediately wrecking her house.

She does think she'll gift it to the house demon as soon as this ordeal was over, however.

"...maybe not..." is what finally manages to leave Lilith's lips, a whispered confession, an acknowledgement of all that she has to make up for. "...but that does not mean I cannot do something worthwhile."

heartbreaking starters

[missallanea-a]

@storiedhistories : ❝ did you have a nightmare? ❞ [Raine to Lilith ^^]

A startled yelp escapes Lilith at being caught in the kitchen at this hour, fumbling with the glass in her hand and narrowly managing to catch it before it had a chance to shatter of the floor and wake up the rest of the household. Mismatched eyes blink through the darkness at Raine's figure in the doorway, and she stares a moment longer before straightening again.

"Wh-what? No, don't... don't be ridiculous. I was just..." Whatever excuses she was trying to come up with falter, and she exhales a heavy sigh. Tapping her nails against the empty glass, she hesitates long enough to fill it before confessing : "Just the one. The same one."

The same one they all had. Holding the glass more firmly to conceal the trembling of her fingers, she takes a long drink of water before looking back to Raine. "...and if you're awake at this hour, it would seem I'm not alone in that."

prompts for siblings ( or spiritual siblings idfc )

[missallanea-a]

@anonymous : 😶 + Right, but why didn't you try talking to her before cursing her, when you were both kids? (Lilith)

"—oh."

Well, that takes the wind out of her sails, now, doesn't it? Whatever irritation and fight she'd been showing only moments earlier is gone, replaced with an uncomfortable sheepishness. "Well... that is, I... I truly thought that Edalyn wanted to join the Coven. It was something we had always talked about, growing up. I didn't realize until too late that she only wanted to join... because we planned to join together."

Exhaling a breath, Lilith takes a moment to twist at a loose piece of her hair, "I should have talked to her. As an adult, it's... so easy to look back on that, and see the obvious solution. But... I was so scared that the one thing I had, the one dream I had been striving towards my whole life, would be taken away from me. I didn't think. And... I really did believe that the curse I placed on her would only last... a day. It was supposed to be harmless. I thought... it would be simpler, easier than trying to convince her to back out of the duel and just let me take her place."

send 😶 + a really uncomfortable question and my muse will answer

[missallanea-a]

@anonymous : 😶 + Lilith, why didn't you just talk to Eda about the Emperor's Coven?

"Now why didn't I think of that? Oh, wait — of course I tried talking to her!" Incredulity is obvious in the sharp tone Lilith takes, her hands lifting in an irritated fashion before she takes a breath, reigning herself back into a more calm state. "It isn't as if my relationship with Edalyn just deteriorated overnight... I spent years trying to convince her to come with me by talking rationally, but... she's always been stubborn. Measures only grew to be more extreme as she became more wanted throughout the Isles."

send 😶 + a really uncomfortable question and my muse will answer

[missallanea-a]

@stardustedstories : ‘ not to be too controversial but i like it when people are nice ’ [Luz to Cool Aunt Lilith]

"And I wish that I could promise you that, once you grow older, all of those... high school cliques and popularity contests and bullying ended, but it... really doesn't. If anything, I think it gets worse : you have people vying for positions, promotions, going through whatever underhanded means are necessary to get themselves there, regardless of who they hurt on their climb to the top — forget about friendships, people only really grow close to you in order to better learn your weaknesses, and they'll turn around and use every single one against you at first chance! Honestly, all of it is just—"

It's only once she turns back around from her hasty pacing of Edalyn's kitchen to face Luz that Lilith seems to realize exactly what she's just said. Closing her mouth, she takes a breath and clears her throat, "But, well... m-my experience doesn't mean that will be your experience. And besides... you and your friends seem far more level-headed than most of us 'grown ups.'"

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