#❝⚜ meme:headcanon edition ❠

[crownxmi]

11

❝ headcanon edition, accepting do you like bubble baths? 

"don't have time for those and just normal baths are fine." he scrunches his nose as he answers, he knows there are people who can not go through a day without one of those, but jaehyun was much more of a quick shower person. they were less time consuming and got the job done. usually, he would come back bloody and in need to get the stench and everything off him, getting in a bathtub with bubbles was just a nightmare. everything goes red, it was gross, the thought making jaehyun grimace. it seemed like he was bathing in someone else's blood, and no matter how much that metaphor fascinated him, he would rather not do the actual thing. like.. ever. "i'm more of a quick cold morning shower, you know. to get the blood running and have a fresh start of the day. if its in the evening, then maybe a slightly longer hot shower to unwind, but i'd rather just stick away from bubble baths and normal baths, whoever thinks they are practical, sure, whatever." he laughs, shrugging slightly as he licks his lips yet again "that's just not my cup of tea apparently."

[crownxmi]

39

❝ headcanon edition, accepting do you regret anything from your past? 

“of course i do. everyone has fucking regrets. even if its not taking the pretty girls number at the bus stop, drinking too much that one time, killing someone, overdosing. there is all type of shit going on on this island and world, that you’d be crazy if you didn’t regret anything.” jaehyun, was not getting angry with this question, he was just slightly more emotional because it does hit a few sour places and tried to open a few wounds he has been healing over the years “i regret a lot, but weirdly enough, nothing has to do with my family. the biological one. i regret the outcomes of what happened when i was 16, and the paranoia that everything came with, but as of recently..” he pauses, pursing his lips for a second before speaking again “as of recently, i just regret not being able to be open with people i want to be open with. my job and life isn’t something i can always tell to everyone. i also regret getting into smoking, but i guess, thats the least of my issues especially when i could be hooked onto harder drugs. oh yeah, i also regret not opening a shooting range instead of moonwalkers, but maybe one day.”

[crownxmi]

14 & 15.

❝ headcanon edition, accepting do you have trust issues?favorite part of your daily routine? 

“sometimes, with some people, i do.” he admits, because it was simply the truth. jaehyun had lived his whole life in hydrus, those were the people he genuinely trusted with his whole being. that was his only family he had left, the only people he knew would back him up if he needed them to and the only people that would beat him in shape if he needed something like that. “hydrus is pretty neat, i don’t really have trust issues with them. they are all in as deep as me, if not slightly less. if anything, i know they have my back when needed.” he pauses, a quiet sigh leaving him before continuing “however, for the other people on this island, its different. you never know who will turn out to be a cop, who would be in another gang, who would be of value to you and who lies to you. so i guess, i do have trust issues. at least reasonable to an extend.”

⚜

this question makes jaehyun actually smile before he answers “first cigarette of the day with a coffee in hand, looking out of the window in my flat.” he says. it was a simple situation, but over the years, he had grown to enjoy the peace and quiet it brought him. someday, that didn’t happen, he was either too busy, or had just forgotten, and his day is all crappy. however, whenever he managed to have time for that single coffee and cigarette by his window, everything seemed to be just a bit better.

[crownxmi]

18 & 19.

❝ headcanon edition, accepting do you ever want to get married?would you rather live without tv or music? 

"yeah, but no." he answers, frown already forming on his features "do you think someone like me, will find true love and be able to keep it? i kill people for a living, no body would want to marry a killer." that was actually a lie, because if he remembered correctly, people were in love with ted bundy and other serial killers, and just the simple thought of that was more than enough to make him shudder "even if i, somehow magically, manage to find true love, to get married, not many people would know. because why would i want the world to know my weakest spot and take it away from me?"

⚜

"oh, definitely tv. nothing good ever happens on tv, lets be real." jaehyun says quickly, not even thinking about it "its always bad news, its always some stupid drama. i'd much rather go to a cafe and read a book, do some work, go for a walk, because tv isn't that interesting nowadays when everything you want and need is on the internet." he pauses, straightening his posture a bit before relaxing again "whereas music, it helps you get through things, you know? listen to some sad music when you're depressed, cry a bit, its all good. pump up some good old rock music when you are driving above the speeding limit on the island, amazing. play some classic sing in the shower songs? right up my alley. i can't let go of music even if you tried and force me to."

[crownxmi]

17, 24

❝ headcanon edition, accepting who are you most comfortable around?what makes you get out of bed in the morning? 

“i can’t say i have a best friend, i don’t think there is such a thing in a life i live. maybe an acquaintance, maybe someone i can lean on, but not truly embody the idea of having a best friend, because there will always be guilt.” he laughs, short and bitter as he explains “maybe soojin? yeah, soojin is a good example, jinah too, well, medusa. but other than that, i don’t think i can have anyone to be most comfortable around. just, you know, make it bearable to be around people." 

⚜

"what makes me get out of bed? in general, its work. its the only thing that gets me going. its not even money nowadays, its just work, work, some more work and if i’m free, there is always work to be done at moonwalkers.” jaehyun explains with a nod, as he actually thinks if there are any other reasons to get out of bed. his safety wasn’t a problem, his acquaintances and co-workers weren’t high up his list either. “maybe i need to get a pet, that would be an amazing reason to get out of bed in the morning. waking up with a cuddling pitbull by my side.”

[crownxmi]

25

❝ headcanon edition, accepting what are you paranoid about?

he licks his lips before biting down onto the bottom one, pulling on the soft tissue as he thinks. there weren't many things that he was paranoid about. if anything, he could count those things on the fingers of one of his hands, and he would still have fingers left to count with. he just didn't have a lot to fear. he was already deep deep down in the route no one should take, even by force. so jaehyun didn't know if he wanted to answer at all. however, he inhales slowly before finally speaking "i guess getting addicted to drugs." he says with a small nod and runs a hand through his hair. it wasn't possible to do without taking in drugs all the time, it wasn't possible, but having seen what it had done to his father and mother, it leaves a bitter and uneasy feeling inside him. it almost makes him gag "i know i have the will power to resist, i've been there, i know i've had the opportunity to go deep deep into that life.. but the fact that i know it could have happen to me, and that it can happen is just.. unsettling. i don't want to be a druggie."