#✦| MAKE THE CLOCK REVERSE (awakening).

[seospicybin]

PLUTO.

EPILOGUE

Chapters: Part I / Part II

Synopsis: Knowing that your life will end soon, you choose to have your desired death by making a pact with the devil with a red hair, Hyunjin. (9,5k words)

Author's note: Thank you for reading Pluto series! As always, feel free to vent on my ask/messages :)

Tick, tick, tick.

That was the last you heard, the ticking sounds of the clock. But what you're hearing right now is the beeping sound.

Your eyes are too heavy but you keep on trying to open your eyes and see where you are.

Once you manage to lift your eyes a little, the lights blind you and you quickly shut them again.

You try to shield your eyes with your hand but no matter how much you tried, you feel like barely moving.

You slowly open your eyes again and close them for a second, it takes you a moment to adjust them to the lights and finally be able to look.

White. It's all white.

You're in an empty room and everything is white, you smell something through your nostrils, something sharp and clean.

You turn your head to the side and see where the beeping sound coming from, it's coming from a machine.

Disoriented and confused, the machine starts to beep to the same rhythm as your heartbeat and it's going faster and faster.

It seems to trigger the machine as it starts beeping rapidly, in a second someone comes into the room and rushes to you.

"You're good. You're alright. You're in the hospital," she softly speaks even though you didn't ask her anything but look at her all confused as she checks on your vital signs on the machine.

"Breathe.... in and out..." she orders you and practices it with you.

Somehow you're following her, taking deep breaths in and out until your heart beats back at its steady pace.

"I'll call for your mother, okay?" She says.

As you are alone in the room and lay on your bed, you try to recollect how you ended up in a hospital but nothing comes to your mind.

But you woke up with your heart aching so much that when you touch your cheeks, they are wet with tears.

If you have been sleeping, you would think it's just a dream that you'll eventually forget about at one point in the day 

But if it's just a dream then why it feels like you'll not dream again? If it's just a dream then why you're not glad to be awake? If it's just a dream then why do you want to stay asleep forever?

-

Here's what happened.

One day, your mother came to your apartment and couldn't wake you up, sent you to the hospital where you stayed in a deep state of prolonged unconsciousness, fails to respond normally to painful stimuli, and cannot be awakened for four months.

The doctor can't find the scientific explanation for it, you got scanned this morning and there's nothing wrong with your body. The simple way to put it is that your brain shut down all of a sudden and puts you into a comatose.

You've been in a coma for 16 weeks and 3 days to be exact, missed the whole winter, and woke up to the warm spring sun.

Strangely, it didn't feel that long for you, it feels like you just woke up from a dreamless sleep.

"Do you remember anything before you went to sleep that night?" The doctor asks.

You force your brain to remember anything from that night, but can't seem to recall anything but you remember going to bed to sleep.

"I remember going to sleep that night and nothing else," your honest answer disappointed you as well. It frustrates you how much you want to remember but you just can't.

"Any details you remember?"

You try to remember again but it's like searching for something that you know isn't there, pointless.

"I heard the sound of the ticking clock and after that... nothing."

Your mother squeezes your hand on the bed, she has been like that from the moment you gained consciousness. She never left your side even for a second and clings to you like the role is reversed, she's the toddler and you're the mother.

"Ticking of the clock?" The doctor asks with wrinkles on his forehead.

"Yes."

Disappointment is drawn on his face as he couldn't get the answers that satisfy his curiosity. Well, sorry doctor, you're just as baffled by the whole situation.

He caps his pen back and hands the file to the nurse next to him, "we need another day for observation and if nothing goes wrong, you can go home the next day," the doctor informs.

Your mom sighs in relief and squeezes your hand so tight, "that's good, honey!" 

It confuses you so much because she's giving you the brightest smile, oozing with pride when you've done nothing but wake up from your extremely long nap.

"Any questions?" The doctor asks.

You shake your head at him, "No, for now," you answer.

"Remember if you feel something, nausea or headache, let us know," he reminds you.

"Sure thing, doctor!"

"Thank you, doctor!" Your mother says before he leaves the room.

It seems like your mom can finally relax after hearing that. She can't stop smiling, she keeps looking at you and brushing your hair.

"You can go, mom," you tell her, noticing that she hasn't changed her clothes since last night.

"I'll go home after your father arrives," she says while tucking the blanket to the side of your body like she always did when you were a child.

"At least go have something, I haven't seen you eating anything since this morning," you insist.

Your mom softly chuckles. She didn't expect that you know she hasn't eaten anything.

You get why she acted like that, she regretted not being there when you got out of comatose and ultimately, she must be scared that you'll never wake up again.

Imagine trying to wake your daughter from her sleep but she doesn't wake up. That must have been traumatizing for her.

After a moment, she finally caved in, "want anything from the vending machine?"

"Mom, have a proper meal, please?" You complain and the role is still reversed now that you found yourself scolding her.

She slowly lets go of your hand and gets up from the chair, "I'll be back in a few minutes," she says.

"Take as much time as you want," you said.

"I'll be waiting," you added with a smile, reassuring her that this time you'll wake up to her call.

She hesitates for a while but your glare works to send her away, taking her cardigan with her as she leaves the room.

The sound of the door sliding open wakes you up from your nap and your head turns to see who's coming.

It's exciting to see someone else other than your mother despite the possibility that things will be awkward since you haven't been social for four months.

The nurse sheepishly smiles as she drags a cart with her, "I'm here to change the IV," she announces.

Your excitement fades a little and you let the nurse do her thing while you look out at the nice weather outside from your bed.

Another person comes into the room and you look to the side to see a familiar face.

"Minho!" You shout a little too loud that the nurse got startled.

"I'm sorry," you meekly mutter to her.

Minho comes to the side of your bed while carrying a bouquet in hand, "hey," he greets you with a soft smile on his face.

"Please, sit down," you gesture to him to sit on the empty chair next to your bed.

"This is for you," he hands you the bouquet of beautiful pink tulips.

You take it with a smile and gently put it on your lap, "thank you!"

He sits down on the chair and looks at you, "you look much better," he said.

Does that mean he visited you before? But you don't want to presume and wildly guess.

"I feel good, yeah, never been better," you say, already feeling awkward that you can't hold a conversation for more than ten seconds.

You could have so many things to talk about if you didn't skip four months of your life.

"How are you? How's work? Tell me everything," You ask while admiring the flowers on your lap.

"I'm good. I got promoted and that required me to move to another city," he answers.

You turn your head at him, slightly surprised by the news, "and you agree to move to another city?"

He nods, "I'll be leaving at the end of this month."

You got sad because you do remember the heartbreak and the fight and the canceled wedding but you hold nothing against him. You were hoping that you get to rebuild your friendship with him and start over.

It seems like you both need more time and space for that.

"Well, that's a good thing that you got promoted," you said with a smile.

"Thank you," he sincerely thanked you.

"We should meet again before you leave," you say to him and hold the flowers close to your nose to smell the floral scent.

He agrees with a small nod and a smile.

You put the flowers down and hold out your hand at him.

Minho looks at it, then places his hand on yours.

"We'll always be friends, Minho," you earnestly say and let him know that you put everything that had happened in the past.

It seems like Minho has been waiting for you to say that and release him from the guilt of breaking the bonds of your friendship.

It's like he has been holding his breath and can finally let it out in a long sigh, he closes his eyes and holds your hand in his, "thank you."

Your mom returns a few minutes after Minho left with a cup of coffee in her hand.

"I met Minho in the hallway," your mother says and sips her coffee.

"Did he comes by a lot?" You ask out of pure curiosity.

Your mom thinks for a second and beams, "I think that's his third visit," she answers.

So he did visit you before when you were still in your deep slumber.

Your mom takes the flowers from Minho and places them next to flowers sent from other people. They're mostly from relatives but it still surprises you that a lot of people care about your well-being to the point that they send you flowers.

"How do I get so many flowers?" You ask.

"That means you're loved, honey," your mom simply answers.

You wouldn't be that sure but it does feel nice to receive flowers.

There's a bouquet of red roses that catches your attention and you wonder who sent it.

"I don't remember receiving this," your mom says just as confused as you are.

"Can I take a look?"

Your mom hands you the roses and you inspect them to find any card or letter attached to them or anything that tells the identity of the sender.

"Nothing," you say with a disappointed pout.

The choice of flowers is what intrigued you because this is a hospital and you send red roses for lovers. For as long as you can remember, you don't have any flings or boyfriends, your love life is pretty much staying in a coma.

"Could it be that someone sends it to the wrong room?" Your mom asks.

You shrug and bring the flowers close to your nose, the distinctive smell of roses fills your nostrils. You smell it again with your eyes closed and something flashes by in your head.

You close your eyes again and try to retrieve what has just flashed by. A memory so distant you don't know if it's real or you made it up in your head, of a red rose and sunset, white sheet and rainy day, of thunder and warm skin, red locks slipping between your fingers and eyes that gleam in the dark, a sinister smile and then a whisper in your ear.

"Come here!"

-

It's not easy to act normal when you slipped away from civilization for four months.

But it's nice to come home and be in a space that you're greatly familiar with, sleep in your bed and drink from your favorite mug.

On the first night back in your apartment, you let your mom stay over with you because you learned that there's no way to put her mind at ease than giving her what he wanted.

There's a stack of letters on your kitchen counter and you definitely don't want to go into that yet.

"You got a call for you," your mom informs as she goes through the notes she has written on the sticky notes on the fridge.

"From who?"

"From the newspaper," she answers.

"Huh?"

"You don't remember?"

You do remember applying for a job but didn't know that they responded to it, "I do remember but I didn't know that they��" but your hope deflated knowing that you must have missed the chance.

"I missed the interview, didn't I?" You ask with your shoulders slumped.

Your mom smiles and hands you the sticky note, "I told them about your condition and they wanted you to contact them if you're still up for the interview," she explains.

"Are you serious?" You ask in disbelief.

She eagerly nods and holds you by the shoulder, "it sounds like they wanted to hire you so much that they are willing to wait for you," she convinces you.

It's a lot to process and you're having a hard time believing it, "Oh my God, I have to prepare myself for the interview," you suddenly got panic knowing that you have a lot to prepare.

Your mom squeezes your shoulder, "hey, you're still in recovery. Take it slow, okay? No need to rush it," she reminds you.

You agree with her, your priority, for now, is to fully recover and once you settled, you can finally live the life you desired.

It's only the beginning but you already feel excited about what awaits you in the future. It's like you've been given another chance at life, a clean slate.

The only appropriate response to a gift is gratefulness and you promise to never take things for granted ever again.

Your mom is fast asleep when you get on the bed next to her, she must be tired from spending the last few months sleeping in the hospital.

You find yourself wide awake and you reckon this comes from the fear of never waking up again, you plan on telling your mother about this issue first thing in the morning. It's time for you to stop keeping things from your mom anymore, you promised yourself that. 

But for now, you try to make yourself tired by finding something to read but what you found in your drawer is a necklace, a gold chain with a locket.

You open the locket to find a little clock with the glass cracked like someone has stepped on it and you figure that this is why you kept hearing the ticking sound, it must be coming from this locket.

You can't confirm that since the clock is dead, probably running out of battery but you keep it close to your chest, closing your eyes, and see if you can remember anything about it.

But instead of the ticking sound, you hear another whisper in your ear.

"Shh... just sleep!"

And just like that, you fall asleep.

-

It takes you a month to finally adjust yourself to a normal life and it consists of participating in what life offers you.

It took your mom a week to finally let you alone and sleep by yourself without calling every hour.

You go to therapy every Thursday afternoon to talk about your trauma of sleeping and you still can't sleep at night but you try not to pressure yourself, you know the process takes time.

When you believed you are prepared enough, you went to the job interview with confidence and left with a proud smile on your face, not worrying much about whether they will hire you or not.

As long as you've done your best, then there's no room left for regrets.

The next day, you got a call that you got hired and you can start working the next week. You can't be more grateful for it.

This Friday, you got invited for drinks with Kim. It's not a wise choice to start drinking again but it's not about if you can resist alcohol but how persistent Kim would be to make you drink.

You put on a dress and put on a little make-up, don't want to overdo it but at the same time, you want to look impressive, it's your first time going out after being out of comatose.

While waiting for the elevator to arrive you contemplate whether to tie your hair or let it down.

When the elevator finally arrives, the doors slide open and you step inside. Someone is getting in after you and you guess he must be your neighbor so when you eventually look at each other, you politely smile at him.

Kim waves her hand up in the air to let you know where she is.

The two of you hugged and exchanged a kiss on the cheek, she hasn't gotten a chance to see you after you got discharged from the hospital so it feels like a reunion.

"You look so pretty, babe!" Kim compliments you while calling for the bartender.

"And you're prettier than I remember," you playfully compliment her back.

She cackles and helps you sit on the stool next to her, "how are you doing?"

"I'm doing good, yeah..." you hesitate a little but can't help to share the good news either, "I got the call from the newspaper earlier," you say with a sheepish smile.

Kim raises her eyebrow, intrigued. She leans in close to you with wide eyes, "and...?"

"I got the job," you announce.

"Oh, my God!" Kim pulls you into a hug and squeezes your arms in excitement.

"I'm so happy for you. I really do!" She earnestly says with a wide grin on her face.

It warms your heart that she is just as happy as you about the news, "and what about you? How are you doing? Any exciting news?" You ask with a giggle and turn the attention back at her.

She fixes her hair and folds her hands on the counter, turning her head at you, ready to spill whatever information she stored in that little head of hers.

"Let's catch up on my love life, yeah?" She fixes her sitting and leans in closer.

"About two months ago, I broke up with my boyfriend," she begins.

"Oh no," you coo.

"I know right? We fought because I told him I'm getting to be just his girlfriend. I thought we're ready for what's next and it's my right to know if we're having the same thing in mind, you know," She sighs and subtly rolls her eyes, annoyed.

"So we argued and he moved out, and didn't come back for days. I gave him time and had a breakdown a few times because I missed him so much."

You intently listen to her story, emotionally invested in it since it's involved someone you cared about.

"Then a few days ago, he came to the apartment and I thought he was there just to pick up his things," she cracks a smile and you guess the story takes a positive turn.

"We had a long talk, heart to heart, I sobbed because I'm not good at talking about how I feel and..." she pauses to sigh again.

"And...?" Your eyebrows raised in curiosity.

She smiles again and put her hand on her temple, "he proposed to me."

It's obvious that you didn't expect to hear this and it's taking you a few seconds to respond to the big news, "what?" You ask in disbelief, a bit too loud that the people around you can hear it.

She shows the ring on her finger, the little diamond catching the light and reflecting it at you. Kim giggles as she holds out her hand at you.

"Aww, Kim!" You coo again, holding her hand while admiring the ring on her finger.

"I'm so happy for you," you say with a big smile on your face.

She smiles back at you, putting her hand on top of yours forming a stack of hands on the counter.

You know you truly care for someone when their happiness becomes your happiness and you couldn't be happier for her.

"And I'm happy that you're back, I do," she says, her voice breaking at the end of the sentence.

"Because I don't know who I'm going to ask to be my bridesmaid but you," she adds.

That reminds you of how much she cherished you and what a good friend she is, you got touched that you hug her for quite a while.

"Let me see that ring again!" You say as you pulled away from the hug.

She enthusiastically shows it again for you, "the diamond is a bit disappointing, eh?"

You chuckle at her and decide to skip answering that.

"Don't worry, he's got something big somewhere else," she adds.

You both burst out laughing, couldn't care less if anyone got bothered by how loud you are.

Oh, how you missed this!

"The birthday girl is going to be a bride, I see?" Someone says.

You turn your head to see the bartender, a sweet smile and freckles, the one face that you can't forget. The one that you let got away from you.

"You remember him, right?" Kim asks you.

You already locked gaze with him even before you can recall his name, "it's the cute bartender," you say, just to tease him.

When you think his smile couldn't get any brighter, he proves you wrong. His smile grows wider and brighter, it's so cute that you almost melt.

He's the first one to look away, flustered. He turns to Kim and asks, "one negroni and one raspberry martini?"

Kim glances at you to confirm he got your order right and you nod.

"Coming right up!" He says and starts making the mix of drinks.

Kim turns at you and leans into your side, "you can choose to not answer it but you said you don't remember much about the last few days before you know..." her words trailed off, probably afraid that the question might be uncomfortable to you.

"That's okay, Kim," you convince her that it's more than okay to ask you about it. It's an unpleasant experience but it doesn't bother you that much.

"How much do you remember?" She asks, genuinely wanting to know.

You prop a hand under your chin and think hard for a while, "I don't know how to explain it but my memories are incomplete..."

You think of an analogy to create a simple explanation, "like I know the whole puzzle looks like but at the same time, I know there's still a few missing pieces," you finish.

Kim pursed her lips and tries to process your explanation, after a while, she lets out an inaudible sigh.

"As long as you remember we had fun on my birthday then we're good," she says with a wink.

"Of course, I remember that. But mostly the part where I had to drag you home," you joked while resting your head on her shoulder.

"In my defense, I was the birthday girl, I deserved that!" She defended herself and puts her head against yours.

The drinks come at the right time, "negroni for the bride girl," he says while putting Kim's drink in front of her.

"Raspberry martini for the 'I hope she's single' girl?" He says with a grin.

You nod and mutter, "thanks!"

Felix stays there and watches you taking a sip of the cocktail he made, hands on the counter, and veiny arms on display.

You suddenly got thirsty and a glass of drink happens to be right there in front of you.

"How is it?" He asks you once you've taken a sip of your drink.

You tug the little straw between your teeth and seductively smile, "cute," you reply.

He shyly smiles because he knows you're not answering his question and definitely not talking about the drink.

He leans forward on the counter and looks at you with one hand behind his neck, "You know there's a different name to this drink?" 

The freckles look fainter than you remember but he's cute nonetheless.

"No," you honestly answer.

"It's called the love potion," he says with a sly smile and a whole lot of attractiveness.

"Love potion, huh?" You look down at your drink, stirring the ruby red drink with your straw and you got a flash of memory.

You remember the same drink but it tasted different, of a white dress and cold night, of you getting off the ledge and an empty bar.

Then there's the whisper in your ear.

"Sell your soul to me."

It feels so real that your head snaps to the side just to see there's no one there. You swear you feel like someone is right there, their head is right next to your ear, and whisper to it.

"Something wrong?" Felix asks.

He must have noticed you acted strange a while ago. You quickly put on a smile and sip your drink, "nothing," you lied.

He scratches the back of his head, making it obvious that he's going to ask you something, "so, are you single now?"

You smile at him, watching how he gets so shy that he can't hold eye contact with you for more than five seconds.

"I've been single for a long time," you answer.

You're aware of how pathetic and hopeless that sounded but who cares?

He pokes his inner cheek with his tongue, "so you lied that day."

One thing that you hate the most is being accused of lying, you may have overreacted and shot him a glare, "lied? When?"

That may shock him a little that his smile fades, "the last time we met you said you have someone waiting at home," he explains.

"I said that?"

He nods, "I reckon that you're dating someone at that time so I..." he stops himself from explaining further.

"Someone at home?" You force your brain to delve deeper into your memory bank and try to retrieve this exact moment when you said that to him.

As far as you remember, you didn't date anyone. The only man you fancied is Minho and that ended miserably then you fell into a coma which cleared the allegations that you dated someone at that time.

"I'll be back," Felix says, getting back to work and taking orders from new customers.

You turn to Kim and ask, "Did I perhaps mention anyone in our conversation?"

Kim puts down her drink and blinks her eyes a few times, "Minho?"

"Other than him?"

"I'm pretty sure there's no one else," she answers.

It got you thinking who is this someone you talked about and who waited for you at home?

"We rarely talk about boys but you did ask me a lot of things about my life on the day you went into a coma," she says, "it's like you knew you were going to—"

Kim clears her throat and sips her drink again.

One thing that you learned after you woke up from your come is that you aren't the only one traumatized by this, your parents and Kim are the proof of it.

You're lucky to find people that cherished you and you promise to cherish them back. You link your arm with Kim's and sip your drink.

"I'll pay for our drinks tonight," you say.

"Cool because I'm thinking of getting drunk tonight," Kim goes into a fit of laughter.

"No, please, don't!" You tease back but also laugh along with her.

Who knew that two lonely people make a great pair?

-

In spring, flowers aren't the only thing that bloom.

In what feels like a second life given to you, your hopes and dreams bloom with the season.

Every day you wake up to a beautiful sunny day with the warm breeze blowing through the window, carrying the heavenly smell of flowers and earth.

And on each day, you make sure to take a moment to be grateful for this given life and everything else that it gifted you with.

A loving parent, a kind friend, and a good friend who lives far away from you but close to your heart, then there's a job that you love.

Ultimately, thankful that you wake up from your sleep and get to live another day.

But somehow, you still feel like there's still a hole in your chest and no matter how much air you take, you stay breathless. You feel full but not whole.

Something is missing and you don't know what it is.

Or is it just the usual human greed of keep wanting more of everything?

You decide to take a day out by yourself and enjoy the lovely spring day, had lunch then bought an ice cream on your way to the park.

You take a stroll under the row of cherry blossom trees with their petals swirling around in the air, creating a romantic and melancholic scene.

That explains the number of couples you've seen, walking hand in hand and taking each other's pictures. You're not going to lie that you get a little jealous.

For a second, you thought that what's missing from your life, a boyfriend.

A moment later, you scoff at the thought and continue walking with your head looking up at the tree branches, soaking in the warmth of the sun shining through the leaves.

"It's such a beautiful day," you sigh in delight.

It's like you've just cast the spell on the sky that it suddenly turns grey and the dark clouds looming above you. You doubt that it's going to rain or that's what the weather forecast said. After a few steps though, the raindrops start hitting the ground and everyone scatters around to get away from the rain.

"Of course!" You huff, annoyed.

You stop by the front of a cafe just a few blocks from your apartment building, with the hem of your dress and shoes wet from stepping into puddles of water.

It's better if you stay and wait for the rain to stop before taking a walk home.

You watch the rain while standing there and catch the smell of flowers, turning on your heels, you see the flower shop next to the cafe.

The buckets of flowers are on display, blooming so beautifully with their vibrant colors pleasing your eyes. Your eyes pause to look at the bucket of red roses.

The red reminds you of the color of your drink, the love potion and the pomegranates your mom puts in your fridge, of your favorite scarf and shade of lipstick.

The red reminds you of... someone's hair slipping between your fingers and of lips kissing your skin.

The red reminds you of...

"I like your red hair."

"And I like you."

Where's that coming from? You ask yourself. No one is there whispering things to you and you don't remember having this conversation with someone.

It's getting confusing because you can't tell which is real or not anymore. You got so frustrated when you look at the roses again.

They're beautiful but the red holds so much mystery.

-

The rain only got heavier so you decided to run to the nearest convenience store to buy an umbrella and start walking home.

You wait for the elevator to arrive and take you upstairs, you grip your umbrella in one hand and your wet cardigan in the other.

When the elevator slides open, there's already someone in it. You look up to see that it's your neighbor, weirdly enough, the one you always share an elevator with.

He's always in his black outfits and standing in the far corner of the elevator, hands in his jacket pockets, and his long hair curtained his face.

You push the button for your floor and lean against the cold steel wall of the elevator.

You catch him looking at the puddle of water on the floor from the drops of water dripping from the end of your umbrella.

"The forecast said it's going to be a beautiful sunny day," you say to him, trying to shift his attention elsewhere.

He looks up at you with no expression on his small face.

"No one was ready for the rain," you add with an awkward laugh.

Since he's not responding to your small talk, you turn away from him and face the elevator door. You uneasily look at his reflection on the shiny surface of the elevator door.

"And they say life is beautiful," he softly says.

Something just slides into place and you froze there, memories flooding into your head all at once like someone plays a movie at double speed and you have a hard time catching up to it.

When the elevator dings open, you see the doors slide open and you slowly step out of it.

He follows you from behind, getting out of the elevator, except that he's going the other way.

You take a left turn while he takes the right turn and both of you start walking further away from each other.

You swallow air and stop in your track, turning around to see him walking away from you.

"Did you make anyone cry today?" You ask him and your voice echoes in the hallway.

He abruptly stops walking and stands there for a second. You hold your breath the whole time he's standing there and when he finally turns around, you feel faint.

Despite the distance, you can feel his eyes on you and you recognize that soul-gazing eyes, how it stares right into your soul.

"No," he then looks at the pocket watch he keeps in the inner pocket of his jacket and says, "but it's only 5.30."

You smile at him with tears rolling down your cheeks and watch him walking towards you, no one but you.

The moment your lips touched, you know you have found your missing piece. It never feels this good to finally breathe and not worry about the hole in your chest.

He kisses you as if he was breathing and you wish you can hold your breath longer to kiss him more.

He presses his forehead against yours and lets out a low sigh of relief.

"I set you free from pain and removed all of your memories of me," he says with his hands holding your face close to him.

"How do you remember me?" His warm breath brushed your cheek as he speaks.

"Because my heart still remembers you," you answer.

He pecks your lips again for a long time then let go with a gasp, softly laughing with his eyes closed, "good girl!"

He takes your hand and intertwined it with his, slipping his fingers between yours, making your life officially complete.

-

This warm skin, these fingers, and hands, his silky hair and plush, red lips, his breathless voice and whisper in your ear.

All of these things make a missing piece in your life and that piece is back in its place, right next to you.

The devil in the flesh, the prince of hell, the one who saved your life.

"Hyunjin..."

He was busy kissing your neck when you softly call his name and he drags his plump lips to your jaw, planting a kiss on your lips to finally answer your call.

"Yes, beautiful?"

You hold his face in your hands and take a look at him, touching his beautiful features of gorgeous eyes and a beautiful nose, rosy cheeks, and plump lips, touching them to confirm that he's real.

"I miss you," you say and your heart hurts from letting those words out.

He softly gazes into your eyes and caresses your cheek with his knuckle, "I miss you too."

His whole weight on top of you should be enough to convince you that he's real and the two of you are making out on your bed.

"I thought you were taking me to hell," your hands are holding the back of his head, tangled in his hair.

He plants a kiss on your shoulder and begins making a long trail of kisses from there to your lips. He gasps when he pulls away.

"Well, this is your hell," he says.

You tip your head to the side, "huh?"

"Your hell is living a cursed life with me," he answers then places a sloppy kiss on your lips.

He looks at you and probably wonders why you got quiet, "or you don't want it?"

You close your eyes and try so hard to verbalize your thought but words can't do justice to what you're trying to tell him.

You put your hands around his neck and hold him close, feeling his warm body resting against yours, his heart lies close to yours, beating at once.

"I really thought I'd never see you again," you cry again from how glad you are to be able to meet him again, cursed or not, you feel alive when you're with him.

Hyunjin buries his head deep in your neck and breath you in, "for a second I thought you're going to be mad at me," he says.

You start sobbing uncontrollably, you didn't know you'd been holding so many emotions but maybe it's all coming from the feelings of your life finally becoming whole.

"You're that happy to see me again?" He asks while chuckling and wiping your tears at once.

You nod.

"You're that happy to live a cursed life?"

You nod again and pull him close, "as long as I'm with you," you croaked.

The thunderous rain is no match to the sounds you make as Hyunjin makes love to you.

It's like your bodies are just as ecstatic to meet again they become one, filling each other's needs and satisfying each other's cravings.

He thrusts into you, slow and deep all the while his eyes looking into yours. Somehow it feels like he's making love not only to your body but also to your soul.

When it feels overwhelming, you pull his face by his chin and kiss him.

He knows your body too well, he knows what gets you going, what pleases you the most, how to make you writhe and make you a moaning mess under him.

When he makes you cum, he convinces you once again that he still holds the highest rate of making you cum, 13/10.

Sex with him will never be a disappointment but the sex you just had feels different, it was exceptionally nice, and it makes you feel vulnerable and powerful, held and set free, to love and be loved, all at once.

With all these emotions flooding inside you, you might as well let them burst out of you.

"I love you so much," you blurt out but you don't regret it at all.

It's bound to be out anyway and this cursed life taught you nothing but to bet every part of you for someone you love.

Hyunjin tenderly kisses you before answering, "I love you too."

And if Hyunjin says this is your hell then you want to stay there, burning in your passionate love for him, forever. 

-

People have their own concept of heaven.

Yours though would be the one that draws a big difference from other people's.

Your heaven has a devil who welcomes you with a soft yet fiery kiss that wakes you up from your sleep.

You giggle when he nibbles on your ear, "morning," you sleepily greet him.

He kisses your temple, "I think it's way past morning."

You force your eyes open and see the sun shining so brightly outside your window.

"You sleep so tight," he says, hovering above you with his face merely inches away from yours.

You loop your hands around his neck, "am I?"

"Did you have a nice dream?" He asks while removing the strands of hair from covering your face.

A dream can't be better than your heaven so you shake your head, "I haven't slept that well in a long time," you say.

"Afraid that you'll never wake up again?"

You shake your head again as he unlocked a new fear in you, "afraid that I'll never see you again," you say.

He softly smiles with eyes closed and gently kisses you, with your naked body under cover he doesn't waste any second but allows himself to touch you all over.

Your heaven is having his head between your legs and his slick, hot tongue on your heating core.

Even after you cum against his greedy mouth that doesn't stop him from dragging his sinful lips all over you, planting kisses, and wetting your skin with his saliva, making you squirm from the stimulation.

He only pauses his exploration to caress your cheek with such loving and a long kiss on the lips.

Then he continues by putting his mouth on your ribcage and sucks hard on the skin, it stings but is still bearable.

Next, he places his lips on your breast, sticking his tongue out to tease your nipple, wetting it and sucking on it.

Then when you're high in pleasure, he plants a bite on your breast.

You yelp in pain and grab him by his hair out of reflex, "oh fu—" you stop yourself from cursing.

Hyunjin quickly rubs over the mark with his hand while smirking at you.

It seems like he's going to make another one and look for the perfect spot for it. His hand slides down your side and then stops on your thigh.

You have an inkling that his next target is somewhere in that area, and although you know what he'll do, you spread your legs open as he lowers his mouth on your inner thigh, permitting him to go ahead with his plan.

He kisses the skin before making a mark there with his teeth.

You grip the sheet as he keeps on sucking the skin and gives it a lick after, you can see the bruise slowly blossoming on your skin.

"I just can't say no to you, mmh?" You mumble but don't sound like a complaint to him.

He kisses the mark after and put his body between your legs with his head resting on your chest.

"Your soul is mine, remember?"

You slip your hands in his silky dark locks, "but not my body."

"That's the point," he takes your hand and kisses your wrist, "I have to let everyone know that you're mine."

He places his lips right there on your sternum and stays like that with his eyes closed.

"All mine," he murmurs as if he's talking to your heart.

"Body and soul," you add with a smile on your face.

He opens his eyes and finds yours immediately, he crawls over to plant a kiss on your lips, tenderly but intensely with a hand on your jaw.

"What happened to the red hair?" You ask with a fistful of his dark hair in your hand.

"You don't like the black hair?"

You softly chuckle and brush his hair to the back, "were you trying to be incognito?"

"Well, it worked because you didn't recognize me until yesterday," he answers.

"I started to wonder why we always met in the elevator, you know. I thought you were my neighbor," you explain while laughing, feeling stupid to ever thought that way.

"Well, I have to keep my eyes on my asset," he coyly says with a sly grin.

He collapses on top of you, capturing your lips in a long, breathtaking kiss, a kiss that takes everything further, a kiss that makes you warm inside and outside.

His body is enough to make you salivate but why only look when you can have a taste of it, a bite of it, and eat it too?

It's amazing that you still know how to get around him, where he likes you to touch him and makes him whimper under you.

You ease yourself down his length and breathlessly moan at how good it feels, how he perfectly fills you whole.

Hyunjin is a walking temptation yet he's your only indulgence.

He roams around your body as you straddle him, spreading his warmth with the gentlest touch of his hands.

"You're so beautiful," he mutters to you in his soft, breathless voice.

"Come here!" He orders, pulling you by the neck and bringing your face close to him.

He opens his mouth and takes your lips in his, hungrily and passionately, as if your kiss feeds and quenches his thirst, as if your kiss brought him life.

You smile when you break the kiss and place your hands flat on his chest, continuing to roll your hips in circular motions.

Low grunts escaped his slightly parted mouth with his hands gripping each side of your waist.

"Good, huh?" You lowly ask.

He delightfully sighs and looks you in the eyes, "like the sweetest sin," he answers.

This is your heaven and your heaven is his body against the white sheet and his smile in between kisses, his soft voice that calls your name, and how sweetly he praises you.

Your heaven is having him on the bed and having him every day for the rest of your life.

And your heaven makes you sin first thing in the morning.

-

A day in your life goes like this.

Even before you can open your eyes, you wake up feeling needy for his touch and he would be there, lying beside you ready to provide you with everything you seek.

You kiss him on the lips and greet him, "morning!"

"Morning, my sweet little sin," he greets back.

Morning sex is always a good idea yet optional. But cuddles are a must.

Just two naked bodies tangled on the bed, indulging in each other's embrace, hands all over with mouths locked in a rapturous kiss.

Breakfast, shower then get dressed for work with Hyunjin trying to sneak a few kisses in between.

You kiss him before leaving the apartment and give him a warning, each day varies from the other.

"Please, don't cause any traffic today!"

"Not with the elevator out of service again!"

"Don't break the copy machine, please?"

Hyunjin sometimes obeys but most of the time, no. The one warning he never obeys is following you around.

He's there when you're stuck on a bus full of people or run with you when you catch your bus, in a meeting, or in the copy room, nowhere is off-limits to him.

He appears and disappears, here and there, anywhere, anytime.

Hyunjin does whatever he pleases.

"This desk has the perfect height," he whispers into your ear.

You roll your eyes knowing that it's him right behind you and his arms caging your body in between.

You were sorting pages of articles on your desk, "remember what I told you?"

"That you miss me at work?" He playfully guesses.

You shake your head and ignore him, putting all of your focus on the task at hand.

Hyunjin brings his mouth close to yours, "Come on, just a quickie," he whispers.

You scoff, "it's never just a quickie with you," you say.

"Like you ever mind," he whispers into your other ear.

You scoff again and put down all of the pages, turning around to face him, "can you stop with the devil's whisper?"

His red hair is flashy against the dull colors of your office interior and background. Truthfully, he's the only thing that makes your day brighter entirely.

"How about a kiss?" he sweet talks with his hands around your waist, pulling you close.

You take a moment to consider it because it's never just a kiss with him, it's never just that, he will want more and you can't say no to him.

He tips his head to the side and smiles at you, "just one kiss?" He sweetly asks.

You put your hands on his arms and feel his biceps contract against the fabric of his dark shirt. He's so irresistible, just one look at his face and you found yourself nodding to him.

The kiss is electrifying already but the thrill that comes from the spontaneity of it and the slight fear of anyone can walk in on you making out with him in your office.

Before you get intoxicated, you quickly pull away from his kiss and sigh, "one kiss and you got it," you say.

With his hands cupping your face, he can easily hold you still and kisses you again.

You whine against his lips but not breaking the kiss.

"At least give me more tongue," he says against your lips.

It's like he has programmed your brain to always submit to his wishes, you open your mouth and stick your tongue a little, letting him twirl it with his.

He deepens the kiss while hoisting your body, sitting you on the edge of the desk.

You immediately let go of the kiss and gently push him away, "that's two kisses already," you remind him.

You reach for his face to clean the lipstick smeared around his lips with your thumb.

"Does it look good on me?" He asks with a lopsided grin.

"Oh, yeah," you playfully answer and remove the lipstick on the corner of his mouth.

"Put it more on me then," he seduces you for more kisses and he's just good at that, tempting you.

You look away before his hypnotizing eyes trapped you in his spell and hold his hands on your lap, "I'll see you later, okay?"

His face drops onto your neck and groans with his mouth on your shoulder.

You hold him close and brush his hair with your finger, "I'll see you at home," you assure him.

He heavily sighs and then kisses your neck before letting you go.

You get off the desk and give him a long hug, "be good."

"Don't have lunch at the cafeteria today," he says as he finally lets you go.

"Huh? Why?"

"It's just veggies and tofu, you wouldn't like it," he says with a cute nose scrunch, which is opposite to his evil doing.

You get suspicious that it's all his doing, "It's you isn't it?"

He pouts and shrugs with one hand lingering on the doorknob.

You glare at him but he only winks in response before leaving the room through the door.

Little did he knows it takes so much in you not to cave into him, you need to take a minute off and fan yourself with paper, calming yourself down.

When it's lunchtime, a co-worker comes knocking on your office.

"Let's have lunch!" She says with a smile.

You swivel your chair to face her, "what is today's menu?"

"It's tonkatsu so we have to hurry," she answers.

You let out a sigh knowing that Hyunjin lied about his warning, "that flaming hot Cheetos," you mutter under your breath.

"What's that?" Your co-worker asks.

"Nothing," you lied.

"I'll be waiting by the elevator," she says.

There's already a long line of people queuing for lunch and you check on some emails while waiting for your turn when someone grabs your elbow.

You turn around to see who it is and gasp in surprise, "Minho?"

A smile rises on his face and you both share a quick hug.

Now you get why Hyunjin tells you to have lunch somewhere else. It's definitely not about the food.

"What are you doing here?" You ask while still surprised to see him there.

"I just came down from a meeting," he replies and holds his briefcase in the other hand.

"Did you—" you pause to move along with the queue then continue, "you got transferred back or what?"

"No, I'm only staying for a week," he answers.

It's ridiculous that you didn't know how much you miss him until you see him again. You link your arm with him and force him to join the queue line, "come on, I treat you to lunch today," you say.

The talk continues during lunch, catching up on each other's life but mostly his life in the new city he's living in.

He buys coffee for both of you after and talks outside by the rooftop of the building where employees come to smoke or just hang out.

"Isn't this the one dream job you had since college?" Minho asks as he sips his coffee.

"Yeah, I wasn't confident they would hire me but..." you shrug and you're just as baffled because you wrote the resume after taking shots of tequila.

You foolishly grin when you remembered that night.

Minho grins along with you, "what? Tell me?"

You laugh because it may sound so silly to him, but you decide to not tell him and then shake your head.

"I'm just so happy we've been so supportive toward each other," you earnestly say with a smile.

Minho puts his arm around you and together you stare out at the view of the city on a beautiful spring day. Back then, you would have overthought every little thing Minho did to you but now, you don't even think about anything at all.

You feel comfortable and safe around him because you know you have a friend who has your back.

You rest your head on his shoulder and sigh, "look how far we've come, Minho."

-

The sky takes a dark turn in the evening as it begins to rain when you get off the bus.

You have an inkling it's someone's doing, someone with red hair and mischief in his eyes, someone who's standing a few steps from you holding an umbrella.

"Can you stop ruining spring for everyone's sake?" You grumble as you approach him.

"It's not my doing," he denies then opens the umbrella for both of you.

It's never a straight game with him, he makes you guess every move he makes. You huddle close to him as you walk together under the umbrella with his arm on your shoulder.

There's a sudden loud crack of thunder that you grip Hyunjin's arm in response.

"Oh, how romantic!" You sneer.

He pulls you closer to his side, "you're walking with the devil but afraid of a little thunder," he sneers back with a half-smirk.

You roll your eyes at him and hold onto his arm, "you knew Minho was in the building, huh?"

Hyunjin got quiet and by human standards, he knows how to keep it cool.

"Are you jealous that we had a little chat?"

He looks unbothered but drops his hand to meet yours and clasped it with his.

But by the devil's standards, he's bad at hiding his jealousy.

You lift your clasped hands and kiss the back of his hand, "did you make anyone cry today?"

He returns the favor with a kiss on your cheek, "No," he answers.

He looks at you with a sly smile on his face, "But I'll make someone cry tonight," he adds with one of his eyebrows raises, hinting that the object he talked about is you.

Well, that's one way to arouse you, subtle but effective.

"That wouldn't be the first time," you say with a seductive smile and the recollections of how he fucked you so hard that you cried playing in the back of your head.

That only arouses you more, got you thinking of his body and his lips and his kisses and his...

You stop walking and he has no option but to also stop on his track.

Gosh, he's so beautiful and hot, literally and figuratively and the best thing is he's yours.

You grab the front of his shirt and pull him close, kissing him so hard that he has a hard time catching up to it.

"You should have told me earlier and I would have come running," you say as you pull away from the kiss.

He scrunches his nose and thinks for a while, "we should start running then," he says.

It's a crazy idea but it seems like you'll never know how to say no to him and you'll never want to learn how.

You take the umbrella from him and ditch it, pulling him by his hand to start running through the heavy rain.

The locket around your neck bounces along with every step you take and you can hear the ticking sound of the clock, of the needles moving forward, counting down to forever with Hyunjin.

Tick, tick, tick...

-

Support my blog by kindly reblog, comment or tip me on my ko-fi!

taglist: @abiaswreck @septicrebel @cursed-mars-bars @ppiri-bahng @drhsthl @a-katsukitty @tangylemonade @bluenights1899 @thisisnotstraight88 @raspbinniecreme @elizalabs3 @avyskai @lachinitaaaaa @is2cb97 @simeonswhore @marvelous-llama

[maxiwaxipads]

Reverse: 1999 Tuxam (but only voice lines)

An arcanist’s work with an unknown era and time of exhibition unknown. Completed on the spring of the 13th of May.

Medium: Rules and Regulations Afflatus: Progenitor of the Efficient [Star] Discipline Fragrance Note: Spicy, Citrus — Juniper Berries, Geranium, Lime, Cypress Size: [If this is still here. I’ll be honest with you. I don’t know how to do this part.]

First Encounter - “I’m much curious about the customs and ways of your world. But where are my manners? I, Tuxam, represent the Tuxedo Sam Kingdom as its Knight of Fragaria. We’re honored to work alongside the Foundation, so let’s hope for a harmonious collaboration, shall we?”

Suitcase Climate - “An altitude with perfection, never too hot, or too cold. Sunny with some clouds—… And rain that was never too much. Ehe. I would be more than happy to tour everyone, including you, to the Tuxedo Sam Kingdom.”

To the Future - “For our hopes, and with purpose—I will continue to live as I have always have. I still wish to be where I am, and I still wish to uplift those around me. Let’s have a beautiful, yet gentlemanly future for us and everyone.”

Idle - “Let’s not stand here. A gentleman must bring joy to others, so how should we proceed in the meantime?”

Greetings - “HALT! Close the door, and come—W-Wait! Not yet! Not yet! Close the door, and wait for an answer! That is the proper way of a gentleman. But… You’re here anyway. Now, what is it that you need?”

Morning - “You’re my last good morning of the day. Why not participate in a gentlemanly stretch and meditation for the day? I can guarantee it’ll wake you right up.”

Bond: Morning - “I awoke with no dream today. Perhaps this means a new change of pace… Although… I’m unsure how I should maneuver and schedule myself today, last minute changes, are well—… Untimely.”

Night - “Out comes the day, and in comes the night. If my voice is capable of awakening others, so might it even be capable of lullabies.”

Bond: Night - “You’ll be refreshed with the promise of a new day, and pen anew with the onset of new suns. So sleep on time to see that sunrise, shall we?”

Hat and Hair - “Sunglasses or visors… If I wore eyeglasses, I would feel too akin to my fellow knights, Hangyon and Pikero. So isn’t a hat enough to cover the sun?—… Or perhaps I should bring an umbrella? A stroll while holding an umbrella with my lord… Would I look a bit desperate if I did that…?”

Sleeves and Hands - “Walking side by side, holding hands, or interlocking arm to arm—I like strolls of all varieties.”

Clothing and Torso - “Cufflinks and pins, hats and visors. Let’s see… What could pair with us tonight? Yes. I believe it’s a gentlemanly-must-have is to have an outfit that accentuates the bowtie best. If luck abides me, I might find the chance to match with Lord Sam…”

Hobby - “Pit-a-Pat-a-Racket that goes from air to air, racket to racket. It’s a fine pastime my lord enjoys, and I can’t help but enjoy it as well. A gentleman must hone himself and indulge in the finer things that make him more gentlemanly.”

Praise - “Attaining the virtues of a gentleman can be achieved no matter the person. You’re worthy to be called one, so why not we shine together side by side?”

Intimacy - “Oftentimes the clock passes as expected... And whenever I gaze at my pocket watch—… just to check the time, it feels empty, doesn’t it? Time passed seamlessly yesterday as it did the day before that. I could burn the time with something simple, but I wouldn’t know if that would be meaningful time.”

Monologue - “Schedules in advance and time never to be disarrayed. With this, I know I can live the world as it is meant. Yes… From each minute, down to the last second, I know I will not waste the precious time I have in this world.”

Chit Chat I - “Hmm—… Oh? Was I bothering you? Something good happened recently… But I worry I cannot articulate it well. But, if you insist, I recently bought a matching set of bowties that I thought would look good with my lord. I’m happy, but would it be presumptuous of me to give it to him? Is the box I picked good enough? Have I straightened the bow correctly…? But if the color is wrong… If it should be lace or a simple ribbon…?”

Chit Chat II - “Something on my back—? I knew it…! Was it Hangyon!? I knew it when he practically patted my back like that! What…What is it? A sticky note? What does it say!?”

Psychube #1 ("Rulings, My Love") - Vagrant is the tameless word— the still-storm function, a quilt that ties In life, the liquid bodies contained within stifled forms Languid texts, bow towards the written word. Psychube #2 ("Anything to Become Better") - Aloft—Tired, Dismal Sighs Paper stacking, spilled ink extract… His gentlemanliness demands control. Gladness is the door that is closed, I’d rather not anyone see me in a disheveled state.

Inheritance: “Noblesse Ingenuity” -

Insight #1: (Grants [Rules Accord])

Insight #2: (Likely an hp% or ark% increase(?))

Insight #3: (Buffs [Rules Accord])

I will admit, I got lazy with Tuxam's ability kit... A mental support character with the star afflatus. At first, Tuxam was meant to buff allies while also debuffing enemies and allies (to empathize with how his too many rules confuse everyone).

I wanted him to provide overwhelming buffs and debuffs, something similar to 6 or Ezra, basically? Provides buffs, but has a detriment.

[Rules Accord], as a concept, was meant to provide debuffs to enemies and allies but buffs for allies. When it reaches its maximum amount of stacks, maybe enemies gain confusion while allies receive a buff like +1 moxie.

If I bothered to write it, Tuxam either provides defensive buffs and a strong shield while deterring enemy defenses or provides flat atk and atk% buffs while deterring enemy offense.

His ultimate would also be a buff to allies but a debuff to enemies.

Arcane Skill I - [Edict of Ease] (Mass Buff)

Arcane Skill II - [Tumultuous and Conditions] (Mass Debuff)

Ultimate - [Class Start! Lesson Objective—] (Channel)

Deployment - “Looks like the gauntlet has been thrown. Let’s prepare for the battle ahead.”

Pre-Battle - “Noteworthy discipline is required.”

Battle Victory - “Handkerchief? We shouldn’t let dirt and sweat deter our appearances.”

Select Incantation I / Select Incantation II - “I’ll help you.” “It can be handled.”

Select 3-Star Incantation - “There’s one way to handle this. Gentlemanly, of course.”

Select Ultimate - “Try not to be troublesome in the future.”

Cast Arcane Skill I - “Guide the world, staff in tow.” “Why not shine together, shall we?”

Cast Arcane Skill II - “We all deserve to better ourselves.” “It’s time for reeducation.”

Attacked I - “..Ggh.”

Attacked II - “H—HEY…!”

[leggerefiore]

Hello, Hello! I saw that your requests are open, so I wanted to make one, after being way shy, aha-

I had this idea, about Archie or Maxie in self aware au, helping you escape the real world by teaming up, because you had, er, not-that-good things happening in life, and I though maybe I can request that?

You can decide who to write about! I am okay with any variant. And feel free to decine, I don't want to make you uncomfortable!

Bye, have a good day!

cw: self-aware au/ddlc au, fluff mostly

characters: Archie, Maxie

looove writing these two together bc their pieces get to be parallels of one another haha. didn't really go into detail about the "irl situation" since it's from the characters pov.

🌧Archie🌊

💧 He was not exactly sure when he gained his consciousness. Maybe he had always had it? Archie did not really care all too much for the philosophical enough to debate it. All he knew for certain was that you were always there. Not the player character that stood before him, but you. He had seen you a few times, he knew. Originally, somewhere in the first run and then a few times after throughout the following… years? He could only run off the internal 3DS clock, which wasn't reliable when you could change it at will. Yet, he knew. You changed. Got older.

💧 The salty winds around him may have been virtual, alongside everything else he knew, and he may have been aware that everything he was doing was for naught and the same end point. That all did not matter. He saw how much you deeply enjoyed the game and was happy to play out his role for you. Though, he was more than eager to see how much he could get away with altering things before you would get suspicious. Something to keep you coming back to him. At some point, he knew that he had become enamoured with you.

💧 Many times, he pondered if there was a way for him to leave this place. It seemed like there had to be a way, but he felt himself unable to do anything significant. A feeling of incapability was haunting. Only worsened by you returning for yet another play through. This time… You seemed different. And not in a good way. It was obvious something was bothering you out there in that unknown world to him. His stomach dropped. Even this fantasy world did not seem to bring you any comfort. Archie thought on it for a long time. Long enough for you to nearly have beaten the game.

💧 It was at the final scene where he was about to awaken Kyogre and send the world into chaos that he finally broke his carefully crafted role. His small character model looked up at the screen with a bright smile. You seemed a bit frightened by the sudden change, but he did not really care at this point. The Aqua Leader knew he could win you over. He had realised something. He could not go out to you, but what about the reverse? “Hey, scamp!” he called out with a new text box, “I get this is startling an' all, but I wanted to ask something to ya.”

💧 He could see the tears that glistened in your eyes more than often enough to make him concerned. “You want to come in here?” he asked. You froze. Staring at the console and rereading the line of text that he had created. It obviously was unbelievable. What were you trying to convince yourself? He could only wonder. “C'mon, I'm not a glitch or whatever yer thinking. It's a genuine offer,” he continued. You blinked this time. Then, you brought your hand to the screen. He reached his own up towards yours.

💧 You could only gasp when your hand actually went through the screen. His own found yours and pulled you in, bringing you entirely into the world lingering behind the screens. You fell onto him as you both landed on to the rocky terrain beneath you. Gasps left you as you gazed around to see the other characters in the scene standing there. Arms came around your waist as the pirate man held you to himself. “Don't worry, they won't react to you,” Archie reassured you with a hardy laugh. You could smell the scent of the sea all about and fell the stagnant air of the cave now.

💧 You both departed from the story beats as he took you to stand on the beach of Lilycove with him. The salty air stung your eyes and nose, but it felt so real. Especially with the unexpected ally in the form of the game's villain. Archie stood beside you with a dreamy look in his eyes. He had an arm around your waist, seeming to prefer keeping some touch on you. All the troubles that plagued you felt so foreign when standing in a distant world with no ties pulling you back. You could see real pokemon, too. It felt impossible. “Well, yer definitely more perked up now,” Archie spoke to you again, “Feel free to stay as long as you like. Nothing really changes here without my or your input.” You gazed at him. He gave a big, playful grin as the ties of his bandana blew in the wind. Here, you felt more at peace.

☀️Maxie🌋

🪨 He could recall the exact moment he became aware of his sentience. It was terrifying, after all. A moment where you realise everything around you is fake and doomed to an eternal loop depending on how often, if ever, your player decides to reset the game. Your second play through was an existential crisis for him, that is to say. The great Maxie was nothing but lines of code, doomed to repeat the same idiotic plan that nearly killed everyone. He would originally only look at you in annoyance and upset. This was your fault somehow. But, he felt connected to you, even still. He could only watch as time passed and you changed.

🪨 Everything around him was fake. Archie was fake. Courtney and Tabitha were fake. Yet, you were real. You were someone he could always find changing with time. He began to understand why you replayed so often. Escapism. His hell of a reality was a fun break away from the hold of the world around you. It might have annoyed him to be stuck how things were, but he was also a perfectionist. The role he was assigned was followed dutifully with little to no swaying from was to be done. Maybe you would get bored and leave him to an eternity of darkness. You never did, however. (Maxie was silently grateful. Your company was the only thing he had going for him.)

🪨 It was all in vain, the many times had attempted to escape thus digital prison. There simply was no escaping the slowly ageing device that he had been trapped within. It held him tightly in his place, never allowing him the freedom even peer into the world that you inhabited. His brain rushed deeply with curiosity about what lied outside. It was strengthened by you returning for yet another play through of this game. But, he felt stricken. You seemed upset – distraught. So much so, that not even rushing to this fantasy world provided any comfort. Maxie's stomach twisted painfully. (Why did he want to help you badly?)

🪨 It was in the Seafloor Cavern that it finally stuck him. Just right before he was to awaken Groudon and bring about a hellish drought that would exterminate all life on earth. He looked up at you. Maxie could not leave, of that he was certain, but could you not enter? He had never broken his character before you, so he felt nervous as he broke the scene's progression. “Hello,” the text box read simply enough at first, “I know this must be unsettling and a bit terrifying, but may I ask you a question?” He let a “yes” or “no” prompt pop up.

🪨 Your eyes went big, glossy with tears and puffy from whatever had been happening before you returned to the game. Maxie swallowed. What was happening to you out there? It hurt for him to consider you. Nervously, you pressed A on yes. He closed his eyes for a moment. “I am not a glitch, nor is this some form of hacking,” he clarified to make it abundantly clear that he was his own free-thinking man, “Do you wish to join me in here?” You froze, obviously unsure about what he said. A moment of contemplation followed. Then, you brought your hand to the screen half-heartedly. He brought his own up.

🪨 Your hand passed through the screen, startling you, but Maxie's hand had already taken hold of yours. Carefully, you were pulled through the screen. It felt like you were falling for a moment, but a sturdy grip helped you regain your balance. You opened your eyes to the heat of the room and stagnant air around you. The other characters in the room stood frozen. You looked around before seeing him. The red-headed man readjusted his glasses in a nervous manner. “Welcome, I suppose,” he nodded toward you, “Don't worry about them, they don't react without input.” He explained. You stared at the magma nearby in fascination. It was real.

🪨 Maxie led you out from the cavern and back to the surface, choosing Mt. Chimney as a place of comfort and getaway from everything that was currently happening in the story. You stood on the mountain curiously, smelling the sulphur in the air as the wind carried the heat of late summer. The Magma Leader stood by you dutifully, fully aware he was going to have to teach you a lot about this world. He stiffened when you leaned against him suddenly, watching distant Illumise and Volbeat float around in the darkness of the night. “You are free to remain here however long you like,” Maxie told you, “... You seem happier now. That's good.” His hand came to hold yours. He gave a small smile to you, watching your reactions carefully. His red strands escaped his careful styling as a stringer breeze blew by you both. Finally, you felt some sense of peace.

[heidengamedev]

Welcome to my gamedev blog!

My name's Heiden and I'm a solo developer with a passion for quirky emotional narrative games!

Work In Progress:

Who's That Mokemon?! (Working Title)

Being made for Yaoijam 2024. A comedy RPG where two boys go on an adventure to break the sleeping curse on their village! Will feature 64 creatures to wrangle, train and evolve. Form your very own mokemon party, kiss your rival and discover the secrets of the island!

There's no way I'm going to be able to finish during the two month jam, but will be diligently working on it during the jam!

Finished Games (in reverse chronological order):

Hug Embassy (2024)

Hug Embassy is looking for a new intern! Could that be you? A short 10k VN with hugging mini-games that can be played in-browser in a single sitting.

Available for Windows and Browser. Free.

Half Haunt Halloween (2023)

Move back home to your supernatural family and earn enough money to prevent the electrical company from shutting off your power! A 30k tragicomedy money raiser about making do with what you've got when the whole system is rigged against you. Also your little brother is a weeb. Nya~!

Available for Windows and Mac. Commercial Release.

A Heart of Butterblue (2023)

City girl Phebe has just inherited a farm. Her father was also just murdered and her grandfather is mysteriously missing. But she's mostly focused on adapting to her new routine.

A 30k horror western VN/farm sim with fully playable farming mechanics (plant, water, harvest, sell, plant), a foraging system, active clock and three characters to get close to and attempt to befriend.

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux, and Steam. Free.

Tomorrow for Mar (2022)

Cast spells on a large cast of quirky characters as Mar attempts to pass their university final while battling the world's most obvious crush. Awkward.

A 2.5D VN with puzzles.

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux, and Steam. Commercial Release.

Also available in French and Italian.

Ziva and the Wolves (2021)

Ziva is dying and there is no cure. Two knights both want the same legendary sword for opposing reasons. The three of them travel deep into the depths of the Goddess' temple to determine the fate of their lives.

A 5k VN with puzzles that take the form of SRPG battles.

Available for Windows and Mac. Free.

Heart is Muscle (2021)

Flex your way to become mayor! The town of Swoleville elects their mayor by way of a flexing contest, and poor Boro has just lost to his archrival. He's got 24 hours to contest the results but also-- the world might be ending?!

A comedy RPG/VN about getting stronger, helping people and saving the world!

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux and Steam. Commercial.

A New Don (2021)

Fia is set to inherit the title of Donna in one week, but has to survive the rest of the family's murder attempts first to get there! Features a nameable giant pet hog.

A 24k mafia-themed otome thriller with two LIs each with their own ending and a slew of bad ends.

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux and Browser. Free.

Also available in Spanish.

Kill the Prince?! (2020)

A prince is being married against his will. An assassin(?) is hired to take care of the issue. Wait, what? This game is gay?

A 5k comedy VN with espionage mechanics and four weird outfits to dress our assassin up in.

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux and Browser. Free.

Also available in Portuguese and French.

The Girl With The Gray Hair Awakens (2019)

A girl wakes up in a room with no memory and no color. Die, continue, die, continue again, and you might break the cycle.

Made in 72 hours as a 'flash gamedev challenge'.

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux and Browser. Free.

The Bog's Heart (2018)

Travel deep into the heart of the bog to find a cure for Meg's mom! But also your dog starts talking? That can't be normal.

A short (~5k) VN with puzzles made for Acejam 2018.

Dr. Frank's Build-A-Boyfriend (2017)

Dr. Frank's ex-boyfriend just stole his research and he's out for REVENGE. Build yourself the hottest bestest boy ever to SHOW UP his STINKY EX!!!!!

A 18k black comedy with point and click elements and a crafting system as well as a customizable custom made boyfriend!

Available for Windows, Mac, Linux, Steam, Nintendo Switch, Playstation Store, Microsoft Store.

Itch.io and Steam version Free. Console Port with New Epilogue Commercial.

Elvine (2013)

Elvine flees a horrible attack on her village to the ruins of an old castle. There she awaits news of the outside world while the ghosts of the past creep up on her...

A 32k somber otome game with two LIs and four endings. The first game I ever made!!! Look at how far I've come, omg.

Available or Windows, Mac and Linux.

[enigmagp]

Poundcake and Circumstances is a story I’ve been working on for months, a modern fantasy setting, following a trio of adventurers in the world of Exicara, as they work to uncover a shadowy mastermind who guides their world to the brink of apocalypse after apocalypse, without letting their own lives fall apart in the process.

Serra Pyrreb, thirty-two, is a war demon of the nine hells, who spent her first adult years summoned to pointless conflicts by wannabe warlocks and middling masterminds. Quitting her job, Serra battled her way out of hell alongside Meiko, now Tatakai, her oldest friend. On the surface, she befriended other adventurers and fell in love with her girlfriend Seren Hart, a minor spirit with whom she now lives.

Warning! Very long design and backstory ramblings below the cut.

Serra is a demon, and her appearance reflects that, being a muscular woman of 7’3” with pure white skin, marked by scars. She has an absolutely massive pair of curved horns, while spines burst from her back down her spine to the sharp tip of a thick, powerful tail. She has deep black eyes with burning white pupils and long, curly, wild black hair. In her sides are a set of slit vents, three openings on either side that help her draw in more air.

Serra’s colors are white, paired with seafoam and pink. She wears a stolen and defaced military uniform, a seafoam overcoat cut above the midriff and worn open over a pink crop top, decorated by simple white epaulets (no tassels!) and a white fourragère on the right shoulder. She pairs them with matching seafoam pants with white stitching, a pair of white fingerless gloves and bare feet. On her left hip she carries a pair of oversized katana in pink wooden sheathes and white wrapped handles, she’s been trying to name them but consistently changes her mind. She also carries a pair of revolvers (based upon colt navy revolvers) in a pair of harness holsters under her overcoat.

Serra Pyrreb was born and raised in Hell. Hell, as it turns out, is not the best place to live, and Serra developed a skill for violence from a young age. Taking a job as a summonable minion at sixteen, Serra worked under various wannabe villains for the next six years.

Living in a cluttered apartment much too small for herself, Serra’s patience slowly wore thin, as her frequent summonings showed her more and more of a world she wanted to be a part of.

Donning a stolen military uniform, and spilling her own blood on a pair of equally stolen katana, the twenty-eight year old Serra imbued the blades with her own willpower and recruited her friend Meiko, then twenty-four, to reverse Dante’s Inferno out of Hell.

Their mission, taking the better part of seven months, was barely successful, and they split up not long after escaping. While Tatakai would go on to join Kaeru, a story for another time, Serra would make her way to New Diagory City, where she was quickly able to pick up odd jobs.

During this period, Serra, now twenty-nine, met Seren. The two grew to know each other and began a relationship, eventually moving in together when Seren realized Serra did not have a house.

Unwilling to let Seren manage the rent on her own, Serra found an ad by Autumn for a startup adventuring group, accepting the position. The crew quickly grew close and have run dozens of successful missions together.

Now, some three days before Serra’s thirty-third birthday, Autumn’s research has gotten them ahead of something big, a conspiracy to use the Knights of Unending End and awaken a Harbinger, prophesied to end the world. Time is running short, and the trio race against the clock to put this Harbinger down before it fulfills its role.

If you'd like to read Poundcake and Circumstances, it's available right here on Tumblr and over on Tapas.

[endlesstwanted]

To See Your Photo When I Wake Up

I’ve been thinking of my fav three lately and I wanted to give them some fluff. This was inspired by @queer-it-up-bingo — OTP and @monthly-challenge — Sunshine. You can read it under the cut and on Ao3 here.

Fandom: Chicago Fire

Rating: General Audiences

Pairing: Sylvie Brett/Joe Cruz/Brian "Otis" Zvonecek

Tags: Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, pDomestic Fluff, Huddling For Warmth, Polyamory

Summary: Joe and Brian wake Sylvie up early on their free day to show her something very special.

Wordcount: 1.1k

Also created for: @fandombingo | Sylvie Brett + Reverse: 1999 Edition | It’s Coming / @multifandom-flash, r2 #2003 | Bunnies for Cuteness + r2 #2005 | Piggyback Cute / @eclipsingbingo | Huddling For Warmth

Hugging her bunny plushie tightly so as not to lose it between the sheets, Sylvie rolled over herself to change her position with the idea to enjoy her free day staying in bed for as long as her body let her.

That usually worked on the second free-day between shifts, but on the first one her working clock told her it was time to wake up, and made sure her partners were also awakened before leaving for the firehouse, around seven am.

Not today, she thought to herself, relaxing again and trying to focus back on what she was dreaming about before she had brightened up. And then came the whispering at the other side of her door.

It was weird that Brian and Joe were up before her, so Sylvie opened an eye and reached her phone, wanting to check what time it was. Minutes past seven in the morning was what the numbers on the screen told her, so her only wish quickly turned to be that nothing terrible had happened to have her partners up that early.

She stayed alert out of curiosity, trying to figure out what they were talking about until she heard her name. And then she knew they were up to no good.

If this was happening a few months back, her fear would have been that her boyfriends were having another disagreement about their relationship and dynamics, since living the three altogether and being co-workers didn’t make it any easier for any of them. Sylvie knew that the two best friends held feelings for one another since the first time she met them, and it had taken both men some time to come together and make peace with that. None of them confessed a thing, of course, until she came into the picture and became the glue into their peculiar love triangle, bringing them closer than they’d been now that they didn’t hide anything that their hearts felt. For this reason, Sylvie was afraid of being the focus of any argument and being a threat for that friendship they treasured so kindly.

As the low voices continued, she thought of getting up but didn’t as she heard the door to her room being silently open.

“Sylvie,” Joe whispered as he approached her bed. She pretended to be asleep, testing the waters to see what it all was about. “You think it’s a good idea to wake her up?” Joe then said over her; Sylvie figured out Brian was at the other side.

“She can’t miss it!” Brian responded but not in a quiet tone.

Curiosity was taking the best of her, so she made herself be noticed. “Miss what?”

“Okay, how long have you been awake?” Brian asked with a smirk, she got to see thanks to the light in the living room coming through the door when she rolled over to be on her back. 

“Since you started whispering on my door five minutes ago,” Sylvie told them.

“Sorry about that,” Joe said with a closed smile, and then threw a deadly glare to their boyfriend, who just rolled his eyes.

“I’m not apologizing, you started it! But I’m doing something better.” He sat down on her bed, leaning to kiss her still sleepy face. “Let me carry you to the living room.”

“Can Geogie come?” she questioned, raising a teasing eyebrow as she asked about her bunny plushie.

“Georgie is always welcome to join us,” Joe nodded, bowing with his arms folded to serve as support for Georgie.

Sylvie got out of the sheets, handing her beloved friend to Joe and then climbed on Brian’s back. His hands were warm where he kept her secured over him, leaning forward as not to lose his balance with the new added weight. They walked outside her room, and Sylvie realised she didn’t get to find out what the discussion was about and only knew where they were heading. “What’s in the living room?”

“The first sunrise of spring!” Joe explained with a huge smile, rushing to be the first one to reach the couch that was not in the place it was usually at.

She frowned, confused because from their apartment’s level they usually couldn’t see the sun coming out, but perhaps that was the reason why her boyfriends were that excited about it (and up so early, too).

Brian left her in the middle of the couch, which was turned to face one specific window of their living room, and had the coffee table accommodated around it as well.

“We’ve made coffee, and hot chocolate for you,” Brian told her.

“It’s early, so make sure you don’t get cold,” Joe warned. He gave her Georgie back and picked up one of the blankets that were over one of the arms of the couch.

Sylvie hugged her bunny while she let Joe lay out the blanket over the both of them. Brian served two big cups of coffee, one for Joe and the other for himself. After passing Sylvie her favourite mug, that was shaped like a koala, with the steamy drink that welcomed a great day she was looking forward to spending with her partners.

She snuggled with Joe, getting under his arm to keep the warmth between them, and then opened her own for Brian, after some sips of his coffee, to get comfortable over her.

The sun came up in the horizon, as slow as Joe played with Brian’s hair, who was more relaxed than Sylvie had lately seen him. She held him tightly with one arm, watching the sun rays hit their window and light up the scene at the other side of the glass while she enjoyed the hot chocolate. It was Joe’s secret family recipe that he only made for special occasions, so that had to be one of them.

It wasn’t long that she had moved to Chicago, but time had started really counting for her when she moved in with ‘Crotis’, as Joe and Brian called themselves. The first sunrise of spring was something she hadn’t paid attention to in the past, due to having been living alone when it occurred. Now, in the quiet of the home she had built with the man she was in love with, Sylvie welcomed the experience of sitting front row for the nature show her partners had been kind to share with her.

She would thank them for insisting on renting that place in particular, reasoning that the views were incomparable, later; when they woke up from having dozed off between caresses and soft kisses.

[earth-unicorn]

RWBY What IF

Weiss.

On the bridge Weiss had to do the unthinkable. Kill Penny. This let Penny pass the maiden powers into Winter. Afterwards Weiss raised her bloody sword against Cinder. Tears poured down her cheeks. Her chest hurt. Anger flooded her mind.

She charged Cinder. Starting a fight that couldn't be won. Cinder quickly overwhelmed Weiss knocking her into the Void. Weiss fell. Fell through the World. She fell until the darkness clouded her vision. When she awakened she found herself stuck in some sort of wonderland.

She explored this strange place. Nothing made since. Talking animals? Living objects? magical creatures? What was happening?

Tick Tock

That's what she heard. A ticking clock nearby caught her attention. Or was it fruit? Maybe both? It was a clock fruit?

Weiss pulled the clock from the tree. The clock's hands stopped ticking. They started to move in reverse direction. Faster and faster. The sky seemed to mimic this clock. Reversing day and night. Night and Day. Night and day. Over and over spinning in the wrong direction.

Smash! Weiss's blade struck the clock, smashing it. Stopping the spinning. Stopping the days that soared backwards. What was that? What did that clock fruit do?

Weiss waited for her team. Visiting the beach every night. Nothing. Years passed and she continued to wait.

Until one night she spotted a familiar red scythe wash up on the shoreline. Followed by an unknown girl. A girl named Alyx. The Girl Who Fell Through the World. And her brother? This didn't make sense. It was just a fairy tale.

Right?

Weiss, Alyx, and Lewis worked together for the next year. Trying to find a way home. Meeting up with the Curious Cat from the story. Exploring more of the Ever After. It was all happening just like the story. Or she thought it was. Until they met the herbalist.

The herbalist talked about Ascension. Becoming something better. Something new. Weiss and Lewis pleaded with Alyx. We have to get home. We have to follow the story. But that only made her distrust them. She became rude and untrusting. Only listening to the cat.

Up until that night. When she finally apologized. She had made Weiss a bowl of soup made from the various berries she had found around the forest. It was delicious for a second. But it changed. It sucked the breath from her body. She struggled. She fell to the ground choking.

Poison ran through her body. Slowly killing her from the inside. Alyx stood above her. Glaring at her. You deserve this, She said. Weiss watched her walk away. Where was Lewis? Still investigating the tree? Weiss gasped for air. She clutched Crescent Rose to her chest.

What would Ruby do? I don't know. Weiss's vision blurred. The breath of air escaping her body. Tears soaked her cheeks. It was over. She was dead. Or not. Weiss had opened her eyes. She was freezing. Her body was sore. She was laying on a pile of... snow?

Where am I? The question echoed in the frozen chamber. You are in the Frozen Palace my queen. The creature that stood before her was a man made of ice? He called her Queen. Why? Later realizing that she had created this place. Her semblance had evolved.

Over time her body healed. She was finally able to walk again. But she wasn't complete. Her body was fragile. Side effects from the poison that had flowed through her. She was also alone. Except for the creature which she later called Klein. He took care of her.

A decade had passed when she spotted the red star shooting through the sky. Followed by a purple star and a yellow star. Had her friends finally arrived? She needed to find out. She'd stopped using her sword a long time ago and her semblance had become too hard to control.

What was she going to do?

Author: This is less of a story and more of a summary on how Weiss ended up in the Ever After for a decade. It's pretty much the same as Jaune's story only Weiss isn't the Rusted Knight. She's the Ice Queen.

[patronsaint-prometheus]

for chekhov:

❇️ , 💤 , 🌈 , 🌟

smile :)

YESSSS HELLOOOO SHAWNNNN . i love to talk about my boy chek... thank you... im gonna go bonkers insane now smile.

❇️SPARKLE - what is their most prized possession? what do they value?

Mr Chekhov Sample is a man of few items lmao. i'd say his most prized physical possession though is his halo. which on its own i could talk abt for paragraphs. BUT i'll try to simplify it. hes a demon who always wanted to be a "good" and "holy" angel. when he got his halo he didnt get it the way he wanted to. he felt guilty for a very very long time about the actions he was forced to take to receive it. Later on though he learned to see it as *his* Instead of *His Mistakes*. He wears his halo disguised as a cross necklace now. in contrast to his horns that could not be hidden even if he wanted to. I think the real thing he values is people. because he lost so many to so many different things.

💤SLEEPING - do they fall asleep easily? what helps them sleep?

SLEEPING IS SUCH A HARD ONE. its a bit more complicated then falling asleep easily or not. hes got a pretty scattered sleep schedule just in general. internal clock is either nonexistent or WRONG . and when he does sleep but has nightmares/is restless, he will start floating off the ground. this is a leftover gravitational thing that wants to bring him back to heaven but is not strong enough to do so. it just freaks him out real bad that his body is still technically trying to drag him back away from earth. and also its a rude awakening to fall 6-10 feet to the ground every time he wakes up . AS FOR WHAT HELPS HIM- coffee. because caffeine affects him in reverse . Sleeping in strange places like the couch or floor or his truck. and falling asleep next to his boyfriend. gay shit heals all.

🌈RAINBOW - what advice would they give to their younger self?

AGAIN THESE ARE SO HARD . CHEK HAS MULTIPLE CHILDHOODS. chek is two different souls combined into one. Quimby and Vika. so thats two childhoods just on their own. but they both were consciousnesses (quimby being a demon and vika an angel) so they ALSO experienced childhoods through their humans. but i'll stick with just quimby/vikas childhoods for this. Chek would tell quimby to stop feeling so damn guilty. HYPOCRYTICAL BEC HE STILL STRUGGLES WITH IT. but its not healthy to be as anxious as she was. You are not robbing others of air by breathing. To Vika i think hed have a harder time. I think just in general its harder to reach vika on an emotional level so he would want to say something that would really matter. I dont think vika really needed much "advice" either. So i think he'd just reassure her that she would be remembered. and that above all it would be a good thing.

🌟GLOWING STAR - what do they think about when they look at the night sky? is there someone they want to star gaze with?

SIGH. SHAWN YOU GAY ASS MFER. I KNEW YOU WERE GONNA SEND ME THAT ONE SDHJGFSDHGF.., Chek Loves The Sky. He very much enjoys the sun and moon and shooting stars. he likes to decorate his favorite sleep spots in the house with glow in the dark stars because he finds comfort in it. After all a very long time ago space was referred to as "the heavens" , so as s demon who is forever disappointed that heaven isnt all its cracked up to be Chek finds hope and comfort in that older concept. Chek isnt sure if a place will ever exist for him/his friends to be at rest for eternity. But he can hope that the sky would be that. And so he thinks of his friends a lot in relation to it. Specifically associating Mark w/ the moon and Red w/ the sun.... as for star gazing. the lore you all were (only shawn was) waiting for. Chek wholeheartedly wants to stargaze with his boyfriend mark. Chek being the butchgay that he is , its very important to him that he gets to show Cityboy Mark the woods. he tries very hard to make it something mark enjoys because he just wants him to get the same joy out of it. Chek is a mainer through and through . so he would bring mark to AMC Maine woods and camp out there so he could show him stars without any light pollution. Chek would realize on the way back home afterwards that he didnt actually look at the stars once bec he was too distracted by mark being there. god damn gays.

[gamey-geemer]

Not the anon but I googled it and found a reddit thread

Deal infinite damage for 4GRU, as long as the twin primes conjecture is true.

A twin prime is a prime number p such that either p+2 or p-2 is also prime. For example, 11 and 13 are a pair of twin primes. The twin primes conjecture ([Wikipedia article](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_prime)) posits that there are infinitely many such pairs, but as of 2024 this conjecture remains unproven. This combo creates a board state where the outcome hinges on this unsolved math problem.

0. Have \[Leyline of Anticipation\] in play and \[Leyline of Transformation\] in play naming "Saproling". Have \[Mirror Room // Fractured Realm\] in the graveyard. Have a prime number of non-Forest lands, one of which is \[Darksteel Citadel\], one of which is a Mountain, and one of which was played this turn.

1. Make infinite mana with \[Sanctum Weaver\] + \[Freed from the Real\].

2. Play \[Abuelo's Awakening\] to reanimate \[Mirror Room // Fractured Realm\] as a creature.

3. Unlock the Mirror Room to create a token copy of itself. Now unlock Mirror Room on the token. Repeat this an arbitrary number of times to create an arbitrary number of Mirror Rooms. Let this number be Y. Then unlock Fractured Realm on all the copies created.

4. Play \[Myrkul, Lord of Bones\], \[Zimone, All-Questioning\], \[Birgi, God of Storytelling\], \[Siege Zombie\], and finally \[Desecration Elemental\].

5. Play \[Mirror Gallery\] (which will cause you to sacrifice all your creatures because of Desecration Elemental, turning them into enchantments because of Myrkul), \[Clock of Omens\], \[Parallel Lives\], \[Life and Limb\] (which combined with Leyline of Transformation makes all your creatures lands), and \[Isochron Scepter\] imprinting \[Narset's Reversal\].

6. With \[Isochron Scepter\], \[Narset's Reversal\] and \[Clock of Omens\] in play and \[Molten Reflection\] in hand, we can copy \[Molten Reflection\] as many times as we want, since the two tokens we create can be tapped to untap the scepter. This will be important later. \[Leyline of Anticipation\] allows us to do this in the end step, and Birgi ensures that we never run out of mana.

7. Go to end step. Y+1 copies of Zimone's ability go on the stack.

8. If the number of lands you control is prime, allow one instance of Zimone's ability to resolve. This will create two Primo tokens (which are also lands, and so will increment the land count by 2).

9. If the number of lands you control is still prime, then allow another instance of Zimone's ability to resolve. We now have four Primo tokens in play, three of which can be tapped to \[Siege Zombie\]'s ability to ping the opponent for one.

10. If the number of lands you control is *not* prime, then the only way to make progress is by copying \[Darksteel Citadel\] with \[Molten Reflection\]. This will increment the land count by 2, but will also force us to sacrifice all of our creatures due to \[Desecration Elemental\].

11. So the *only* way to have 3 or more creatures in play for \[Siege Zombie\] is for two instances of Zimone's ability to resolve consecutively (without having to create lands with \[Molten Reflection\]). This can only happen if a pair of primes differ by exactly two - a pair of twin primes.

12. Repeat steps 8-10 until you run out of Zimone triggers. Since we know that we can only deal damage when the land count is a twin prime, we should use \[Molten Reflection\] to increment the land count between Zimone triggers so that every Zimone trigger resolves when the land count is a twin prime. This will maximize our damage output for a given value of Y.

13. Our damage output is therefore capped at (Y+1)/2 or the number of pairs of twin primes in existence, whichever is smaller. But Y can be made arbitrarily large, so our maximum damage is infinite, if and only if the twin primes conjecture is true.

EDIT: Some commenters pointed out that you could re-use the same pair of twin primes by targeting one of the noncreature, nonland artifacts (e.g. Mirror Box) with Molten Duplication. There are a few ways to prevent this: you could reanimate these artifacts as creatures with additional copies of Abuelo's Awakening, then turn them into enchantments with Myrkul; or you could give these artifacts shroud as u/URPG_Ash_K suggests. Thanks for the feedback!

Did you see that Magic: the Gathering now has a game state in which you need to prove that there are an infinite number of twin primes to win? I can explain it more if you are interested.

(With reference to this post here.)

By all means, please tell us about the Magic: the Gathering combo which requires proving the twin prime conjecture in order to win.

[writer59january13]

Where art thou anonymous benefactor...to offer me succor?

Ah... methinks legal tender could be a boon to help me bolster

mein kampf with necessary material equipage, which prospect to acquire essential commodities sabotaged

at the altar of gullible travails, thus perhaps thee could make a contribution to mine gofundme page.

Castaway stranded on figurative deserted island pitted with absolute zero salvation, sole recourse finds scant consolation with prayer lifetime atheist draws futile faith within himself grudgingly accepting feeble accomplishments ditto permanent estrangement among kith and kin tortured more punishingly versus death sentence of choice: firing squad, gallows, guillotine...

nostalgically sentimentally, and zealously yearning fore gone girl(s) of mine, one spouse two grown offspring long since severed emotional home ties even when under same roof appalled, embarrassed, jarred particularly regarding good for nothing hang dog looking papa, mentally unfit father, who wrought misery upon heads he begat chronically dirt poor Mainline moocher never earning a bloody

cent claiming psychological disability (verity substantiated with professional assessment attests to psychological mental illness probably present during inchoate biological development in utero, and most definitely congenital) unfortunate no supportive resources, thus experiencing grievous incalculable relentless scapegoat treatment - me no kidding inadvertently subjected with cruel, diabolical,

exponential sucker punches while riding the bus sitting stone temple pilot faced during class, belittled, defeated, framed unfairly as spitball culprit during eighth grade mathematics with Missus Labosh subsequently painfully shy lad threateningly harangued, and nearly paddled courtesy Methacton Junior High School principal Mister Clock believe me you, aye remained mum about said incident til...this moment,

not surprising since every unpleasantry suppressed unwittingly festering within psyche in tandem with threatening rapier sarcasm ostracizing jibes cumulative wrath unwaveringly smoldering, passively brooding, visualizing punching meanies, screaming... wanting to kill - sublimated hurts glowering, exploding... decades later -

more often surfacing unannounced at odd times venting bile at wife directly, and barking

at deux daughters subjecting innocent progeny with mine anger, or rerouting, harboring, channeling... pathological addiction answering and posting personal classifieds, yours truly guilty attempting to appease call of wild at mental, physical, and spiritual expense additionally setting poor paternal example accompanied with detached avoidance maybe costing yours truly king's ransom and/or receiving my just desserts, yes?

Thus yours truly imagines

whizzing backward at light speed

to reverse engineer and rejigger space/time continuum

many stupid blunders

that cost me being knocked out cold

courtesy rock em sock em life size robots

compromising opportunities the figurative ball

slipped out of my court

bungled, fumbled, mulcted

courtesy naiveté I did excede.

Analogous to albatross greater than weight

Atlas shrugged, severely over burdening fountainhead, yours truly intermittently wavered, sputtered, petered... out bumped uglies fumphered, rutted, née languished along since birth, (possibly while in utero, or even moment of conception nada so thoroughly good by George) or well resigned dirty deeds done dirt poor deeply grooved within very self restricted comfort zone,

eventually digging deep black hole sun, infinite void everywhere exit prohibited, whence twilight o' mine waning existence awakened sober inescapable realization impossible mission to garner je nais ne quois joie de vivre, thus officially reeling courtesy psychological angst (strumming), whereby galactic dash board pluck pitted against frantic ethereal desperation) eek clip sing el sol lure rays refracted back

rendering blind did as a bat sightless wayward son helplessly, rustling grimly, futilely groping, lumbering, resigning, scarce tenacity clutch slipping automatically bing foisted transcendent

state, where absolute zero soundcloud bereft succor – meadow fore enshrouds hermetically sealed turin soul (mine) cocooning grubby human forever pinwheeling within otherworldly realm

timelessly suspended within infinite void n'er aging, rather regressing toward infantile state, unable to distinguish familiarity after aye promise never tug heave fanta see piquing curiosity

acronym spelled out regarding above

soda describing bubbling sensation "**** And Never Touch Again," red alert universal emergency advisory button commencing countdown to

Armageddon, but subsequently resign quintessential pregnant outcome housing grimacing deathstill blackness unbeknownst to constitute afterlife, or less disconcerting, disheartening, disenchanting... prospect namely imperfectly square discombobulated chaos betokens palatable alternative, perhaps revelation (cryptically spelled courtesy Chinese fortune cookie) less

dim sum more tolerable conclusion possibly incorporates being rezoned, repurposed, reassigned... within parallel universe fast D'Cell rating indicative approaching beginning space/time continuum, where cosmos concentrated into microscopic speck sagely, taste fully, gingerly... handled... courtesy garden variety

budding fubar Homo sapien.

An armature linkedin to robotic divine creator, who never tired plying matter into big bang dang boomerang contraption only to release stretched material with frisson cold snap, crackle, and pop

indiscriminately, haphazardly, gamely... flicked teensy weensy itty bitty cosmic dross - poofing into immeasurable shift shaping said vast bajillion mile wide instant karma credit witnessed umpteenth

birth expanding into former vacuum of nothingness simulating an all encompassing immense awesome kaleidoscope when

viewed thru virtual reality goggles all the while frustrated wordsmith toying

with incomprehensible far out mind boggling notion defying elaboration.

[gadgetsaudit]

Want to Wake Up on Time Buy any of these Summer Alarm Clock, Read The Features here.

We’ve all had difficulty falling asleep, nighttime tossing and turning, and grogginess in the morning. With devices at our fingertips, sleeping well is more difficult than ever. When our circadian rhythm is out of whack, it may have an impact on our emotions, our ability to function in daily life, and even our general health.

We have looked into dawn alarms because of this. These clocks that simulate sunrises try to mimic real dawns and claim to make getting up in the morning easier. The Philips SmartSleep HF3520 Wake-Up Light, which retails for $108.95 on Amazon, is our favourite because of its realistic sunrise light, excellent speakers, and simple to use interface. However keeping in mind various requirements, we created a list of the top dawn alarm clocks for everyone. 

SmartSleep Wake-Up Light from Philips

One of the most expensive dawn alarm clocks we discovered is the Philips SmartSleep Wake-up Light. This clock is at the top of our list since it is obvious that the majority of the investment is made in the light itself.

Its frosted matte plastic creates one of the most realistic sunrises (and sunsets) for wake-up lighting, developing over 30 minutes from a deep red to a brilliant, warm white.

While the SmartSleep lacks features like vibrant illumination, breathing or meditation exercises, an abundance of soundscapes, or connectivity with other smart home devices, it does provide the bare minimum. The SmartSleep contains a built-in FM radio, a series of tiny buttons for setting the alarm, getting ready for bed, and listening to five rather realistic nature sounds.

The functions that are missing from this gadget aren’t necessary useful for sleep or even in general. The 20 exquisite brightness levels, which allow you to choose the strength of your dawn, are the true emphasis here. This alarm does what it is intended to do really well: replicate daybreak with a superior brightness.

In terms of nighttime rituals, it provides a realistic, calming sunset function that may be used as a reading light before your room completely darkens (essentially, the sunrise in reverse). The straightforward, understandable LED screen allows you to adjust the settings.

Overall, the Philips SmartSleep is our top recommendation for individuals who desire a realistic dawn and sunset. I was awakened feeling prepared for the day as the light bathed my room in a rich hue that seemed really natural.

Pros

Sunrise and Sunset are realistic

pristine natural sounds

logical interface

Cons

lack of unique characteristics

Awakening and Sleeping Light

The Philips Connected Sleep and Wake-Up Light offers some fascinating “smart” capabilities for a more opulent bedside gadget. With our top option, you’ll get excellent dawn and sunset views, but you’ll also receive a user-friendly touchscreen interface and a light-guided breathing exercise for thoughtfully beginning or ending your day. The Philips SleepMapper is a comprehensive, free app that provides real-time information about your sleeping environment.

One significant disadvantage is that the doughnut design doesn’t emit as much light as dome-shaped ones. Yet, the light’s beauty is unmatched. The computer-generated sunrise gradually transitions from a deep red to an orange and finally to a brilliant, warm white—just not as vividly.

There is just one dawn colour palette for the SmartSleep Wake-Up Light. Both the app and the touchscreen controls are simple to use and offer you access to all of the alarm’s functions.

The device’s ability to keep track of the ambient conditions in the bedroom is another noteworthy feature. It keeps track of the room’s temperature, humidity, light level, and decibels and analyses the data to offer suggestions for enhancing the quality of sleep.

The setup procedure is more complicated than other processes, which is a minor drawback. The alarm required a while to reconnect with both the Wi-Fi in my house and the SleepMapper iPhone app each night once I had linked them. Despite this tiny drawback, it’s a fantastic tool for understanding sleep and maybe enhancing it. If you intend to utilise the pricey features, they are well worth the money.

Pros

a number of pale colour schemes

Understandings to enhance the environment

simple to use and browse

Cons

Much less brilliant than others Occasional connection difficulties

Sunrise Alarm Clock by Jall

The Jall Wake Up Light works brilliantly and offers a variety of intensity options, despite having a somewhat cheap impression. If you’re a heavy sleeper, this could be the product for you because it’s described as being “particularly for heavy sleepers.”

The light also includes seven other coloured glows in addition to the sun simulation, which adds a wonderful touch for atmosphere. Read the instructions carefully to understand the controls because they are not simple.

Also, when the speakers are used, the inexpensive cost is obvious. Forest bug, ocean waves, and rill sound are the three warning tones, and they all have a low-quality, muddled sound.

This seems like a reasonable option given the price. But remember that in terms of quality, you get what you pay for. It might end at any moment.

Pors

good-quality lighting

Many lighting choices

Cons

Device feels inexpensive

low-quality audio

It could take some practise to operate buttons.

Bodyclock Shine 300 by Lumie

Despite the Lumie Bodyclock Shine’s limited illumination selections, I really liked it. I found the quality of the bulb to be almost as good as our top selection after delightfully awakening before the alarm went off as the “sun” started to rise.

The Lumie only comes in one set of colours. The brightness may be changed, the dome effectively spreads light across the space, and it gives a stunning sunset. Although the light easily awakened me up, it doesn’t seem as plausible as the other choices. It doesn’t have some of the more natural yellow and orange tones, while having wonderful pinks and reds.

With its vivid LED display and elegant fabric base covering the speakers, this alarm clock rates well in terms of aesthetics. Although the clock itself feels light and seemingly cheap, I have no concerns that it will break anytime soon. The 15 sounds on the Bodyclock Shine 300 include some unusual noises like “Kitty Purring” and “Café” (which sounds like a bustling coffee shop).

However, the first few mornings I had trouble using the snooze button. I gently tapped the alarm’s bulb, but it didn’t go away. It wasn’t until I tapped it harder did the snooze feature start to work.

Pros

Domed structure creates a brilliant dawn

Beautiful in appearance

Simple to use

choices for unusual sound

Cons

one style of colour

lacking unique traits

Restore Hatch

Even the elegant package it comes with shows that The Hatch Restore is the most aesthetically beautiful of the bunch. This alarm clock is significantly more compact than some of the others, making it a fantastic choice for someone with a modest amount of available nightstand space.

The Hatch’s smartphone app provides amazing customizability. I was daunted by the array of options when I used the alarm for the first time. It can assist in establishing a bedtime routine in addition to functioning as a morning alarm.

There are several different white noise soundscapes, bedtime tales, and guided meditations included. 22 dawn and sunset colour gradients are also available, along with adjustable brightness and hue strength.

The bulb comes in a variety of hues, however it doesn’t precisely replicate dawn or sunset. Instead, it’s just a nice light to wake up to or fall asleep to. Other companies do a better job at simulating natural sunshine and its effects. If you truly want a morning alarm, you should think about that.

The Hatch Restore was evaluated by sleep expert Lindsey Vickers, who bemoaned the fact that the dawn never awakened her up. That was instead the alarm chime.

I had no trouble waking up before the alarm tone even went off. My bedroom is so dark, so it’s possible that I slept lighter or that I was more susceptible to light. But, it might not be the ideal option if you have a semi-lit room and you have a deep sleeper.

One warning: A $49.99 yearly membership is required to access the majority of Hatch’s meditation and soundscape options. But, you may take advantage of a six-month free trial of the membership.

Pros

absolutely adaptable

a variety of audio choices

low-profile, sleek style

Cons

App required for access to all controls

Annual membership for full access to all feature

Read More: Want to Wake Up on Time Buy Any of These Summer Alarm Clock.

[shadowsshowdown]

Deus Ex: Human Revolution Shadow’s Showdown 29

The Art of War.

Washington.

The sound of the alarm clock woke Adam with intrusive breaking into his subconscious. He was lying on his back with his right arm bent and raised above his head, feeling an odd weight on his chest. Under normal circumstances, he would have said it was probably a cat, one that was a little overfed. The man slowly turned his head to the right pleased to find it was Laura asleep and pressing her cheek to his chest. It was one of those mornings that could have lasted an eternity, but alas, good things can’t last too long. The woman stirred and yawned slowly opening her sleepy eyes. She muttered something under her breath but to him, it was only intermittent streams of warm air tickling his skin.

"Holy shit..." she muttered again. "My head..." "Good morning hummingbird," he replied, still making no movement. "Hummi... Wait, where am I?"

Lying on her side, Laura leaned on her elbow and then sat up. She tried to piece together the shreds of information coming into her not-so-conscious brain. She knew she was not at her place but at Adam's. But how?

"You had drunk a bit too much last night..." he tried to explain, but she got into his words. "Did I wandered to the wrong room again? I'm not here! I’m gone! Just give me a sec!" she exclaimed trying to escape from the bed. "Wait, not so fast," he stopped her. "I brought you here myself. I didn't want to rummage through your things to find your room card so..."

The woman looked at the dress resting on the back of the armchair, then at herself. "Wait a minute. You undressed me! Without my knowledge! Without my consent! You..."

At a moment like this, Jensen was grateful for the invention of the cell phone, which ringing interrupted their conversation. He hoped Laura will cool off by the time of conversation. He looked at her apologetically and picked up the call.

"Yes, we'll be there just a little later. Laura and I need to figure out a few things. Can you guys handle it? Yeah? That's great."

Laura had lost the urge to reproach Adam for touching her when she was drunk. She looked at her watch in horror finding that it was about 10 am. She was not supposed to cause him any problems, but in the meantime, she was doing everything in reverse. When the man finished talking she was already putting on her dress.

"Running away as usual?" she heard Adam's soft murmur behind her and felt how his fingertips gently stroked her back as he helped her zip her dress. "I’m doing everything wrong," Laura stated in a depressed tone as she took a mirror out of her purse. "That’s not true. Our job here is mostly to supervise. We don't need to be present during placing every inch of cable and screwing each bolt," he explained with calmness. "I have to go anyway," she replied taking her shoes and heading to the exit.

She wanted to open the door, but Jensen placed his hand outstretched to the side on it. The woman stood motionless looking at it and didn't know what to do. Somewhere deep inside, an old fear had awakened. Kratos had acted similarly, but after all, the ex-SWAT did not resemble him in any way.

Adam no longer thought about how many of his rules he had broken and how many more were left to break. He leaned in and kissed her long, hot, and with passion. The woman didn't fight back, she succumbed to his will, surrendered completely to the moment. Longing, pain, fear, uncertainty, joy, tenderness, concern, lo... She felt all his emotions. They were so intense she couldn't bear them.

I wanted that kiss Laura, as much as I want it now. I know you felt it. I know it...

She moved away from him abruptly, opened the door, which was no longer blocked by his hand, and ran straight to her room. Laura sat with her back pressed against the closed door telling herself what she felt was just a figment of her imagination. Her thoughts quickly changed track to one about work. Adam assured her she hadn't messed anything up, but what else was he supposed to say? The woman got up from the floor and went to take a quick shower. She immediately dressed in comfortable jeans, a loose grey sweater, and leather lace-up ankle boots. While taking the jacket from a coat rack, Laura made sure she also had all of her notes and blueprints. Finally, she grabbed her drone and left.

Jensen wasn't there yet when Laura started work. Connor was also missing somewhere which she was half glad about. She checked everything step by step, crossing off entries from the list written on the tablet. In doing so, she was more thorough than any other inspection. She owed it to him, and a sense of duty was something that had always been important to her.

"That lantern over there," she said to one of the workers. "It needs adjustment. It should illuminate the area next to the helipad, not directly on it," she explained to which the man nodded.

The hacker reached for her phone wanting to check the security of the power generator next to the building, and at the same moment, a paper file full of documents slipped from under her hand and fell to the ground.

"Holy fuck..." she cursed under her breath. "My, my, words like that coming from your mouth? What got you so mad?" asked Connor gathering scattered things from the ground. "I should have been here a long time ago, not..." she cut the sentence with a loud sigh. "Laura, listen to me carefully," his tone turned serious. "You think you work with machines? Everyone was at that party yesterday, then we went wandering around the local clubs. No one is holding anyone accountable, no one is looking as if you were guilty. You haven't let anyone down. They're a solid crew. They had fun last night, they're going to be a little out of shape today, but everybody's going to do their job and so are you. Don't be so hard on yourself." "You're right just..." she couldn't just finish the sentence. "It's just I..."

Connor smiled as he watched her try to say such simple words. "You care about him, after all, I know. Still, you shouldn't agonize over it so much. If Adam has no objections then that's the way it is. I've known him enough to know he always talks about everything honestly."

"I do care, but not in that way. At work, I can be as responsible and professional as he is. In the meantime, I'm making one slip-up after another that's only making my situation worse," she explained, avoiding the uncomfortable subject. "Forgive the directness, but that dance and kiss were pretty straightforward," Connor didn't budge an inch. "It was a mistake, a misunderstanding, a mere..." the woman's voice faltered momentarily.

The man immediately regretted being so harsh with her, but he wanted to make Laura realize that she should draw clear lines and define herself throughout this comedy instead of trying to play different roles. However, he hadn't expected such an emotional reaction from her. He didn't expect her to cry therefore he embraced her tightly and hugged her stroking her back.

"You're a monstrously hard case, but I can handle that too," he mumbled trying to comfort her.

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

   ― Sun Tzu, The Art of War

On his way to the convention center, Adam received three phone calls including one from Pritchard. The ex-SWAT’s mood deteriorated rapidly after only a few seconds of listening to his squawking. He walked with a quick pace holding a cigarette and paper coffee cup in his left hand and his phone in his right. He had just finished replying to Malik’s message then tucked the smartphone into his coat pocket. Jensen didn't think there could be anything worse than Francis. The sight of Laura in Connor's embrace made him feel a hundred times worse. That asshole is touching her! What the hell is he thinking?! Emotions boiled inside him like lava and this time reason couldn't drown them out.

"Forgive me for interrupting this intimate situation, but it seems we came here to work," he said in a husky cold voice as he approached the embracing couple. "I suggest you follow the schedule," "Of course. I’m terribly sorry Mr. Jensen..." muttered Laura pulling away momentarily from Connor, who in turn refused to let her go at all. As the woman walked away a bit, returning to her duties, Jensen sent his rival a warning look of sinisterly squinted grey-blue eyes and frowned brows. This clear message did not at all have the desired effect on Connor. It even became a prelude to the upcoming war. The answer was short and firm. The man's brown eyes did not bend at all under the ex-SWAT's gaze. They froze still, effortlessly withstanding the enormity of the anger, and his lips only twitched in a smile. The computer expert knew how to deal with more than just software and was very firm in his actions. He also knew that Adam was able to separate private and professional matters, so he would not face any consequences for what he had just done. The men parted like a pair of experienced gunslingers to meet one day at high noon and once and for all decide which of them is better. Jensen returned to his routine of answering calls, listening to reports, and inspecting the surroundings for possible sabotage or sneak-ins through exposed areas. First, he checked everything he and Laura had noted down on their previous visit, then he relied on his experience and imagination. Unfortunately, the clash with Connor brought him out of balance. What bothered him the most was the fact that nothing like that could happen before because he knew how to control his emotions, but now he behaved like a teenager. For the rest of the day, he sat in the office of the former CEO staring at the screen of his laptop which showed the plan of the building. Laura had already checked everything she could and fixed any minor or major problems. Most were related to errors in account passwords or basic lack of access to certain devices or files. Those were things she called 'The jewels of the day'. Today, a forklift was remotely taken over by a prankster and nearly ran into a power generator because the perpetrator didn't know how to fully control it. The woman first relieved herself by using unflattering words to describe his stupidity then thanked him for finding the security hole, which she fixed until her lunch break. She would have loved to sit here until evening, but Connor took her out to a restaurant. This time it wasn't the one at the hotel but another equally cozy one, and most importantly - Adam wasn’t there. "You should get some rest. You look exhausted," Connor said as he sipped from his coffee cup. "Really that noticeable?" muttered Laura tormenting on a piece of cake. "Unfortunately, but you know me enough to know..." "That you always come up with something," she finished for him. "Bravo, you guessed it," he admitted clapping his hands quietly. They both laughed, and when they stopped the man reached for her fork, scooped a piece of cake onto it, and pretending to be an airplane, moved it toward her lips. "VTOL is requesting permission to land," he said, mimicking the pilot's voice. Laura slowly opened her mouth. She felt a little silly but only for a moment. With Connor, she could quickly relax which was always monstrously difficult with Adam. What she didn't know was someone was watching them. Together they returned to work learning that several new cases had unexpectedly appeared within an hour of their absence. Laura noticed that Connor was extremely capable of managing subordinates, and such experience takes a long time to gain. She didn't dare to ask him directly about what he did before he started working at Sarif Industries. "A forklift? Did I hear right?" he was surprised when she told him about today's problem. "Aha... It's not anything new, but I didn't expect anyone to use it here. Anyway, good to know." "Seriously. Do you think there's that much danger? This is just a speech about some research, not a summit of presidents from all over the world." "I don't know," the woman sighed finishing correcting the last lines regarding security. "What if it’s Rosetta Stone's big thing? Later we might regret ignoring those potentially irrelevant dangers. I know we won't make sure everything is taken care of anyway. Something will always be overlooked, but I want as few of those things as possible," she explained comprehensively. "You should be the boss. You're better suited for it than Francis," he admitted with sincerity. Laura shook her head negatively "Pritchard is a pain in the ass, but you have to give him credit for knowing what he's doing. He knows when something is important and when it isn't. He has a nasty nature and likes to push his responsibilities onto others, but that's what being a boss is all about. I really appreciate and admire him even if we rarely get along." Connor smiled hearing those words and in his mind he found himself liking Laura more and more. He hadn't even ruled out something more, especially now when things had broken down between her and Adam. Why should he give in to his will if the Head of Security kept changing his mind? "We have a lot of work ahead of us tomorrow," the man stated as he checked off the list of things he had written down. "Implementing your code, then seeing how it works. These things today were just little pebbles that we'll connect to the whole system later." "We will connect?" she asked looking at him with her eyebrows raised in surprise. "Did you just offer to help me?" "I did, although I'm probably allowing myself too much," he replied rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous motion. "You're wonderful! Thank you!" she exclaimed in euphoria and spontaneously kissed his cheek. "I'm about to blush," he muttered laughing.

After lunch, they didn't go back to work. Laura went to her room, and Connor went for a walk.

Adam was mad at himself because he couldn't solve the simplest problem. His thoughts constantly revolved around Laura and Connor. Today he had crossed the line, what would happen tomorrow? What he did was thoughtless, unprofessional, and childish. He might have excused himself if he were about twenty years younger, but at the moment he was a grown man of age 34. Perhaps a little too rigidly sticking to his resolutions, not spontaneous enough, but that's how life and his experience shaped him.

The door closing with a quiet slam did not manage to focus his attention. He still pretended to be very busy with work. Only Faridah's quite shapely ass resting on the desktop right next to his hand momentarily brought him back to the world of the living. "You know I don't like it when you do that," he muttered grudgingly. "Like so many other things," the woman shrugged her shoulders. "I've already stopped caring about it." "But I didn't," he replied with exasperation in his voice. "That's why you will sit in the armchair." Malik assessed that Adam was angry for some reason and she guessed what, or rather who, it might be about. Well, what she came with would not make him feel better at all, however, she was not going to let go. She didn't react to his command either, instead, she put the phone in front of him and pressed the play button on the screen. Jensen frowned as he saw Laura and Connor. He wanted to turn off the recording and tell Malik what he thought about the spying and also that what was visible meant nothing but at the same moment, he saw the kiss. He struggled to bring his muscles to order, with even more effort he kept an indifferent expression on his face. "Faridah please don't stick your nose into my business," he warned in a harsh tone. "I will stick it in because these are my affairs too." "I have nothing in common with her anymore. Laura can do what she wants, where and with whom she wants." "I've never heard a worse bullshit in my life," she snarled, intertwining her arms across her chest. "Let me decide that," he announced drumming his fingers on the desktop which meant he was getting angry. "Since you care so much, talk to Laura, tell her how idiotic she is acting, that she should stop immediately and be with me. After all, it's unthinkable she could be dating someone else!" "I thought you were different Adam," she said in a cool tone. Jensen wanted to reply even more harshly and tartly but he remembered what Rupert had told him and what he had replied. "You probably think I'm at ease, that I don't care about all this. No Faridah, it is uneasy for me at all. Seeing her with Connor makes me feel like killing him for being near her, for touching her, for getting along so well. Laura is so free and happy with him. With me, she's scared and closed off." "Oh dear, I almost feel sorry for you. Listen to yourself, preferably a few times. This is not the Adam I know." "And what man do you know?" he asked in a colorless, tired voice. "I know a man who can fight for his own, a seemingly rough guy who gains on closer knowing. Someone you can rely on. That Adam wasn't a frightened puppy wagging his tail. He was a predatory tomcat. I can't believe Damien affected you that much." "Believe it or not, what I want most right now is for Laura to be happy. If he's providing that for her, well maybe I'm not good enough for her." "You didn't give her a chance to decide. Everything that was beginning to blossom in the snows of Uppsala was trampled by Damien." Malik moved to the sofa feeling that the conversation was going to be a little longer than she had expected. Adam turned off his laptop, tucked it into his bag, and joined the woman a moment later with great hesitation. He sat down resting his elbows on his thighs with his palms facing the floor. His gaze focused on the opposite wall but his thoughts drifted off somewhere far away. He wasn't inclined to talk about what was bothering him, but he felt he needed it more than ever. "I still feel something for Megan..." he said quietly. "I still hope she does too which is why I should let Laura go now there is a good opportunity to do so." "Who are you trying to fool? If me you've failed, and if yourself then you're an idiot," Faridah couldn't stand it and raised her voice. "Listen..." she paused taking several deep breaths. "Megan is a wonderful person. I like her and appreciate what she does, but you know very well yourself that you weren't completely happy with her. Washington will finish a phase, then there will be new research and projects. Her career progression will accelerate, so tell me where in all this will you be? Between one interview and another? Do you want that?" "I don't know," he muttered. "I know I don't want to get Laura’s hopes up." "By all the pests of the world! You've already done that. You're up to your ears in shit, and it's up to you to get out of it. The truth is, you're looking for excuses to get me off. Fine, if you want to there's no problem, I'm gone." Faridah got up and headed straight for the door without looking back, without a shadow of hesitation. "Wait. Yes you're right I'm looking for excuses," Jensen ran hands through his hair making it look like the ruffled spikes of a hedgehog. Malik returned to the sofa, just looking at the man in silence. She saw with what difficulty he was talking about his problems and emotions. She also saw how Laura was able to change him and she couldn't leave it like that. "Rarely have I been so sure of what I feel. Laura is so completely different from me. She is the contradiction of everything I look for in a woman. Unpredictable, childish, arrogant, but many times she surprised me so much that I crave her closeness more and more. She is like a breath of fresh air in a stuffy room. But seeing her with him, seeing how perfectly they understood each other, I found there was none of that between us outside of the professional realm." "Don't let go and fight for her. Stop looking for problems. Maybe she's not looking for a carefree little boy at all but a mature, responsible man? We don't know much about what happened in her past, but I have a feeling this is just the peak of the iceberg. One thing is for sure - she needs us, and she needs you the most." "I had hoped that over the course of this week I would be able to repair at least some of our relationship, but it's getting worse." Adam kept silent about the unfortunate comment after he had kissed Laura at the party. He also kept silent about the second kiss in his room. "Washington is a bad place. Here everyone is busy, stressed with work. You guys need peace and quiet like you had in Uppsala." "I thought I might spend Christmas with her. At my place or at hers, she'll decide. But I doubt if Laura will agree." "That's a great idea, you should ask her. In the meantime, focus on your work and on bothering them. Show up close to her, just be there so she doesn't forget. I have to go. Sarif first promised I could stay here, and now suddenly I'm terribly necessary for him and no one else can fly instead of me. He has even postponed the party here."

"Thank you for listening to me," he said gratefully and got up to walk her to the door.

It was already dark outside the window. The streetlights illuminated the streets and even the hotel corridors had quieted down. Laura was sitting on her bed bent over her laptop which screen illuminated her focused face. She had the impression that there was still a trace of Adam's kiss on her lips even though she had washed her face several times. She was pleased to find that all the code was now ready to be implemented and it couldn't be done any better on her part. Tomorrow she would ask Connor to double check it and add his thoughts. She wanted to go and take a shower but halfway to the bathroom, she was interrupted by a knocking on the door. She stopped in mid-step raising her eyebrows in surprise.

"Who the devil carries at this hour?" she muttered under her breath and went to check the source of the noise.

The woman looked right, then left, but the corridor was empty, lit only by lamps built into the ceiling. She shrugged her shoulders and was about to close the door when she saw a red envelope lying on the gray carpet. This sight awoke her worst thoughts and dormant demons. Kratos had always liked red, especially if it was the color of blood. No matter whose it was. She remembered how he painted his face with it during every mission, she remembered he liked to make love to her the most whenever she had her period. He was kind and tender to her then, only then. Other than that brief time she was dirty and worthless to him. Laura picked up the envelope with a trembling hand and placed it on the nightstand. She wanted so badly to go to Adam now, to show him that Kratos was back, but she promised herself she would keep him away from this shit. She wrote a message to Joe using the other phone, but it could not be sent because a number did not exist. She walked around the room for a long time, then went to take a shower and walked around the room again. Finally, she onto the bed and by some miracle managed to fall asleep.

All  chapters can be found: [AO3], [dA], [Wattpad] and [Tumblr]

[thecaffeinebookwarrior]

Monster of the Week: A Writer’s Guide to Vampires!

The Basics: Vampires From Around the World 

Almost every culture has its vampires, and they go way beyond Dracula and Nosferatu. 

There are obviously too many to include in one post, so here are a few especially unique vamps to get you inspired and interested in learning more! 

The Penanggalan, Malaysia - Literally meaning ‘to detach,’ the Penanggalan is an exclusively (apparently) female creature. 

By day, she masquerades as a normal woman (and let’s be real, don’t we all.)  But by night, her head detaches from her body and floats around, entrails hanging like tentacles -- which they nightmarishly use to entangle their victims -- and preys on pregnant woman and babies.  Lovely. 

Creepily, the Penanggalan gravitates towards day jobs such as midwifery, so she can get closer to her prospective prey. 

The Manananggal, Philippines - Much like the Penanggalan, the Manananggal has an unfortunate habit of detaching parts of her body to fly around.  Described as an “ugly, hideous woman” (mood), the Manananggal can detatch her whole-ass torso to fly around like a bat. 

Like the Penanggalan, she preys on pregnant woman and unborn babies, with, creepily, her incredibly long tongue.  Some, however, prefer to seduce and prey on men -- preferable, to be honest -- in which case they appear young and beautiful.

The Upir, Eastern Europe - Ukrainian, Belarusian, Russian, Romanian, and Czech cultures all have mythos around this abnormally bloodthirsty vampire.  Not only do upirs drink the blood of their victims, but they bath and sleep in it.  They eat the flesh of their victims as well, and are especially partial to the heart.  In a uniquely sadistic detail, the Upir is thought to consume the children of a family and then the parents. 

The Alukah, Judaism - Literally meaning “horse-leach,” the Alukah is one of the earliest vampires, originating in the Bible.  

A fixture of Jewish folklore, and sometimes described as a demon or witch, the Alukah is unique in the fact that she is not undead but a living, shapeshifting being (according to the description in Sefer Hasidim.)

She can fly by unfurling her long hair.

The Brahmaparusha, India - This nightmarishly extra vampire will drink the drained blood of its victims from a skull (which it carries around at all times), before noshing on their brains and wearing their intestines as necklaces and crowns.  Worst of all, this vampire has an unusually ravenous appetite, and consumes several victims per night.  

The Callicantzaros, Greece - In Greece, children born between Christmas and Twelfth Night were thought to be bad luck (?) and susceptible to vampirism.  The Callicantzaros was considered to be egregiously unpleasant, equipped with devilish talons with which to tear victims to shreds.  Their first victims, post-transformation, were supposed to be their own siblings.

Unfortunately, this led to a degree of mistreatment and hostility towards children born during this period, as parents watched for signs of their progeny’s prospective vampirism.  In order to ensure that they didn’t become Callicantzaros, the children’s feet were dangled above a fire, like a reverse Achilles.

Vampire weaknesses: 

Garlic - This one’s not just particular to Western mythos.  Southeast and far Eastern vamps like the Manananggal are also vulnerable to garlic. 

Salt - The Manananggal is vulnerable to salt, as are vampires from most cultures in which salt is considered holy or purifying. 

Silver - A holy metal.  The origin of the “vampires can’t see themselves in mirrors” myth is because it used to be a component in mirror-making. 

Vinegar - Again with the Manananggal. 

Daggers/stakes/sharp objects - Especially through the vampire’s heart.  In many cultures, burning the heart is also advisable.  Be careful, though: sometimes, staking an upir will only bring them back to life stronger. 

Dismemberment and fire - Most vamps are susceptible to this, including the Penanggalan.  The only sure way to kill an upir is to decapitate them and burn the remains. 

Counting - Much like the Count of Sesame Street, vamps can’t resist counting things.  If you scatter some small, countable objects on the ground, the vampire will have to stop and count each one. 

The tails of stingrays - in the case of the Manananggal. 

Sunlight - Obviously.  Though not universal, this pops up in vampire mythology around the world, including the Manananggal. 

Detachment - when the Penanggalan and Manananggal detach their heads and torsos, their discarded torsos and lower bodies are vulnerable.  In the case of the Manananggal, sprinkling the discarded legs with garlic and salt.  The Mananggal will not be able to return to its lower body, and will perish with the rising sun. 

Starvation - The Alukah can be starved if she’s prevented from eating for long enough. 

Stupidity - In the case of the Penanggalan.  If you turn the Penanggalan’s body upside down, she’ll re-attach backwards.  I’m not sure what the purpose of this is, except the exhilaration of punking a vampire and making them walk around on their hands all day like a jackass.

Protection: 

Thorns around windows - Thorns will keep the Penanggalan from harassing you or your unborn children. 

Strings of garlic - Just make sure SOME IDIOT doesn’t take them down (RIP Lucy from Dracula.)

Pots of uncooked rice, ash, or salt - Repellent to the Manananggal.

Running away and hiding - Basically the only method of recourse against the Brahmaparasha.

Eating bread infused with an upir’s blood - Sounds kinky, to be honest. 

Stay on sacred ground - I.e. graveyards and churches.  Just be sure you’re not trying to avoid the kind of vampire that dwells in graveyards if you go for the latter.

Holy water, crucifixes, silver, et cetera - Anything sacred or holy.  Varies based on culture.

Imbibing the ash of a supposed vampire’s burnt heart - I’m not even going to joke about this one, since people actually did this during the vampire scare of New England (my homeland.)  I learned about it from a book about local vampire encounters at the Newport Public Library at age twelve, and it scarred me.

Dangle your baby above a fire - Actually, no, PLEASE don’t do that.  But that’s what seventeenth century Greeks did to prevent their kids from turning into Callicantzaros. 

Age of consent laws - Specifically for Edward from Twilight.

Don’t get a welcoming mat - Counts as inviting them in.  Duh.

Ways to Become A Vampire:*

*Ask your doctor if becoming a vampire is right for you.

Biting - Obviously.  Though if you read Dracula and early accounts of vampirism, it was more of a slowly progressing illness than a sudden transformation.

Reject Christianity - In the case of upirs.  More specifically, the church buried non-believers outside of graveyards, leading them to rise as servants of the Devil.  Honestly, I feel like the church kind of brought that on themselves. 

Be born between Christmas and Twelfth Night - At least if you’re in seventeenth century Greece.  

Be influenced by the Devil while dying - Another version of the Upir origin.

Be a demon possessing a corpse - One prospective explanation for the Brahmaparusha.

Making a pact to obtain eternal youth and beauty that involves not eating meat for 40 days and then breaking it like some kind of an IDIOT - One version of the Penanggalan origin myth.  I shouldn’t judge, my self-control isn’t great either.

Get startled by a man while meditating in a bath and jerk your head so hard that it flies off and at the interloper in fury - Another prospective version of the Pennangalan origin. Relatable, honestly. 

Be so bitter and jealous of couples that you go on an insane killing spree of pregnant woman and get publicly executed by being ripped in two - The Pennangalan, again.  She makes the Kardashians look tame. 

Chanting an incantation, anointing yourself with oil, and purchasing a black chick - In the case of the Manananggal.  The black chick reportedly lives inside the Manananggal, eating its innards while also acting as its life source.  Honestly, after all the drama of the Penanggalan’s origins, this seems reasonable.

Other Sources

Video Essays: 

The Power of the Vampire Myth - A superb sociological dive into the cultural significance of vampires. From the post WWI antisemitism of Nosferatu to their ability to subvert the Hays Code, vampires tend to reflect the shadows of every society. 

Dracula: A Brief History of Eternity 

CREEPIEST Vampire Legends from Around the World 

Vampires: Folklore, Fantasy, and Fact

How did Dracula become the world’s most famous vampire?

Vlad the Impaler: The Real Life Dracula

Influential Vampire Fiction:*

*That I’ve read/seen so far.

Dracula - Duh.  The greatest adaptation of which is, obviously, Dracula: Dead and Loving it.  

Nosferatu - It’s good to be aware of its antisemetic overtones, but it’s still revolutionary at evoking dread.

Varney the Vampire - A penny dreadful series that helped popularize vampires in Victorian England.  It gets bonus points for sounding like a children’s show. 

Camilla - The ORIGINAL lesbian vampire, predating Dracula by decades.  Became an adorable webseries and movie, which I recommend even more than the original novel.

‘Salem’s Lot - Serves as a study of what makes vampires scary in the modern era.   

Underworld - Aside from serving as a badass alternative in the Twilight era, it merits inclusion exclusively for causing my Sapphic awakening at age twelve.

What We Do In the Shadows - Has a unique understanding of the cultural significance of vampires, and why they appeal to societal misfits.  Also has vampire “children” who eat p*dophiles. 

Vampires in the Lemon Grove - The titular story is one of the most unique interpretations of vampires that I’ve seen in the modern era.  Beautiful language that evokes a powerful emotional response.

Twilight - Exclusively because it gave us Rosemary clocking shop in a wedding gown.  And the baseball scene.

Nonfiction:

The Encyclopedia of Vampires, Werewolves, and Other Monsters

From Demons to Dracula: The Creation of the Modern Vampire Myth

Vampires and Vampirism: Legends from Around the World

New Orleans Vampires: History and Legend

Mummies, Cannibals, and Vampires: The History of Corpse Medicine

A History of Vampires in New England 

Happy Halloween, and happy writing, everybody! 

[d-druxy]

Another Sumi Design rant (spoilers)

I am back on my bullshit after debating myself yesterday in bed when I couldn't sleep.

The redesign that I did for Sumi was done when I hadn't completed the game yet and while I don't think that it's completely unusable, I also don't know if its actually that fitting for her after I've seen the conclusion of Royal.

My personal gripe in the beginning was that she obviously looks like the sexy halloween costume version of Joker (or like the feMC). Her whole design and color scheme is lifted straight off of Joker. From the coat, to the buttons and three flaps in the back as well as her gloves. (also: another personal gripe: why tf does the gymnast wear high heels!?? but I digress..)

Originally I thought that I could just disregard her canon design and let her keep it since the first awakening that she has isnt even her actual one So I could just "splice" my redesign onto her second awakening.

But I'm unsure how much sense that makes for her actual character.

I originally also expected something very different for Sumi.

This notion only solidified itself for me after I accidentaly found out that she has two awakenings (at the time I already had reached her first awakening in game).

Which was that she is a mirror to Akechi but in reverse: That they both have two "main" Persona and two metaverse outfits. So while Akechi goes from white to black, Sumi would instead go from black to white (design wise).

...

this obviously did not happen and yeah I feel like that is extremely fucking cheap on atlus part and only adds insult to injury when you think about the fact that Sumis whole character arc is that she has to "find her true self" and yet her ENTIRE design and even her second PERSONA are based on Joker/Arsene.

So now we come to my true dilemma:

Someone on reddit theorized that the reason for why Cinderella and specifically the version of "Cinderella at the ball" (which we can see in cendrillons design because of the clock on her chest) is Sumis Persona. Which is that Cinderella at the ball functions as a socially acceptable mask. It Basically represents her as Kasumi, playing her part in society. But ofc as we know that is not who Sumire truly is.

While I personally don't quite care for the rest of the take. I quite like this reading as to why Cendrillon specifically is her Persona.

Which made me think. If Cendrillon is her first fake "main" Persona, the same way that Robin Hood is for Akechi. that would mean that Sumi would need an additional Persona and that the design that I based on Cendrillon wouldn't fully work. It also shot the concept of her going from coal to a diamond in the foot, at least for myself... kinda, maybe, I'm still torn about it

[chronolium]

Though it may have appeared to the public that the researchers at TSI were doing nothing at all after their announcement, that couldn't have been further from the truth. They were working practically around the clock to figure out how to reverse their mistake, under the very watchful eye of Nadia (who was told to report everything back to the now untrusting Council).

In their haste to make things right, they either never seemed to notice the additional effect it had, the entangling of the Lifelines pulling random people into other memories, or if they did notice, they never mentioned it.

After attaching additional devices to their previously placed memory amps, they activated them without warning the public (again). Lifelines throughout the city pulsed, going from their normal brightness to near dull and back again. Those who were currently reliving a memory were suddenly ripped out of it and awakened where they were before entering it. Others who were just going about their day had a brief moment of forgetting why they were there and why they even existed, like the feeling you'd get if you were a simulated entity and some higher deity cancelled the next action you were supposed to take.

Regardless of where you were or what you were doing, this event lasted only a few moments, but probably left you with a terrible headache for a while afterwards.

But the fix was a success; tests conducted immediately after confirmed that everyone's Lifelines returned to how they were before... more or less. There were some unexplainable anomalies in some of them, but nothing life threatening and nothing keeping any memories locked, so as far as TSI was concerned, it was a successful repair. Things went back to normal.

Not long after, TSI Research Tower started offering up highly experimental personal memory amps, replacing their previous exoskeleton technology. These will provide the intended memory-reliving effects without the risk of locking your memories (but you may experience other mental side effects) and without dragging others into your memory. They may even be able to bring true, unaltered memories back to the surface of your mind, if you somehow overwrote them during this event...

-

Chronolium's second event, Entangle, has come to a conclusion! We hope you enjoyed this event and the opportunity to involve others in your muse's most personal moments... or the most silly, or anything in between.

Aside from the newly offered personal memory amps, which you can now find at the TSI Research Tower, nothing has changed with the city this time! So there's not too much to say at the end here except a thank you, for continuing to write in and enjoy what Chronolium has to offer and that, as always, we are open to feedback about this event or anything else if you think there's something we could improve on!

See you next time!

— The Council.

[tundrainafrica]

Title: A Tale of Two Slaves (10/17)

Summary:  “Soulmates don’t exist. Fate doesn’t exist. Everything is a choice.” At that moment, Levi could only watch as she made the choice for him.“

Reincarnation AU. Levi remembers everything from their past life. Hange doesn’t.

Note: This took a while. I had this written out for a while, I just spent a good amount of brain cells trying to figure out where to cut this. It’s almost done actually. I’m expecting like (at the most) 5 more chapters so maybe I can get it done by the end of March if I muster up the courage and the effort to do all the final revisions to the last few chapters.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Other Chapters:1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Link to cross-postings: AO3

As Levi soon found out, Hange kept a folder online tagged ‘Levi Ackerman.’

The oldest pictures were dated more than three years ago and the first had been one of his cool down after his performance at his first tournament. There was variety in the pictures and they covered everything, all the way from warming up on the bench, positioning himself to run and those few moments right after launching himself in the air to the peak of his jump. She had even snuck pictures of his interviews.

The first time he opened it, he had first checked the dates to make sure he hadn’t been dreaming or assuming she of all people had been a fan. The weirdly strong emotions he had felt at the realization of the existence of such a folder had only made him all the more vulnerable and the last thing he had wanted to do was an act on an illusion or trick of the mind.

The experiences he had on the field clearing jump after jump had become routine over the five year period. Despite the changes among the faces in the crowd, the cheers that had only been getting louder and louder and of course, the oval that changed with the venue, sometimes the only thing Levi did remember was the blue sky staring him down and gravity pulling from behind.

Maybe that was why he had ended up in a state of disbelief the first time she had shown it to him.

How did you not notice her? Levi was sure he wouldn’t have anyway. She was a stranger, one stranger in a crowd of people. Although she may have been one unchanging face in a crowd of thousands of changing faces, she was still a stranger to him. And strangers just tended to blend in more easily.

A valid point. Yet the regret and frustration were still fresh inside him despite it having been weeks since she first gave him access to that folder

She had first showed it to him the morning after that eventful night, after having dealt with a hungover Nanaba. It was only in the evening that day after Hange had escorted her three friends to the station did she sit next to him on the bed and scroll through the pictures herself with Levi right beside her. Naturally, she was still hesitant to show that side of her, she scrolled a bit too slow at times, while a bit too fast at other times.

For a while their roles were reversed and Levi found himself prodding Hange for more details. Eventually, she did share the link to the folder in exchange for links to his story and Levi was quick to comply. They were both exposed anyway, there was no need for any more secrets between them. Only one condition that had seemed a little too frivolous at first glance, yet somehow Levi understood it.

Hange requested that he go through the pictures when she wasn’t around. And soon after she requested it, Levi realized he preferred that too. Despite the fact that he did trust her not to judge whatever she may find on the folders, there still existed an uneasiness at baring one’s heart out to someone in words one couldn’t control anymore having written the stories out too long ago.

Consequently, he requested the same thing from her. Do not read it while I’m around. When he told her the stories, he at least had control of his tones, his diction and the packaging of the overall story. Watching her read them, he knew he would find himself doubting the words he had written while at the same time vacillating between decisions to correct his previous writings or let her read. The constant self consciousness that came with the second option had just been too stressful of a prospect. He decided himself, he would rather have full control of the exposition or none at all.

The decision to have no control and no input, to be absent when he bares his heart out was not easy to make. And he continued to feel the traces of that struggle in the way he so easily lost focus and ended up mindlessly scrolling through the folder. His mind had shifted to other things more specifically the prospect of whether or not Hange was doing the same thing then and there.

She was only a phone call away. He could ask. But it had just seemed idiotic. Of course she wouldn’t be checking on it, she had been cramming for an exam that morning in between preparing for her mid semester thesis presentation. She hadn’t even bothered to say any greeting but an ‘I’ll follow’ before he left for the therapist that morning.

He looked through the messages in the waiting room, and up at the time displayed on the upper right part of the screen.

9:43. She was still in the middle of her exam. She won’t be checking on it.

Levi looked at the ceiling above him, allowing the plain white view above him to ease him back to his reality. How long had he been staring at the phone? He closely felt for the aches and discomforts around his body. The dull soreness that made itself known as he stared up at the white ceiling above him only served as a reminder that he had been a little too exposed to quick scrolls and the unnatural glare of his phone for a potentially unhealthy amount of time.

It was his first physical therapy session and Hange had pointed out that he should be early just in case. Consequently, he had shown up at 8:30 for a session at ten.

Just in case you get lost. Just in case there is paperwork which still needs to be filled. Hange would have done the paperwork already. He had ended up clocking that little doubt and that need for a little prophylactic thinking to caution on their end. First times tended to make people a little more cautious. And more importantly, what else was there to do on a Saturday morning other than sleep in?

Either way, that long wait had left him with eyes a little too tired yet at the same time, he was bored out of his wits. He looked around the waiting room finding something else to entertain himself with.

I only have seventeen more minutes to kill. It shouldn’t be too hard.

The atmosphere of the waiting room was nothing like getting lost in nature or on the road. It was stark white, bleak and a little too rehearsed. In other words, it lacked dynamic and consequently. it was too boring to find any amusement in. Of course, they wouldn’t want to stress out any patients with anything too fancy or overwhelming. Yet, the only thing which Levi could have found worth giving more than a passing thought to were the people around him.

And only when Levi started focusing instead on the people and not on the off-white plastered walls of the waiting room, he somehow was able to distract himself from the dragging motions of time.

There was an old man with a knee brace. A middle aged man with an arm in a sling and a girl with a casted right leg. There were others who could have passed up for nothing more than a visitor, until they stood up and Levi noticed in their gait the slight hesitancy to put one foot in front of the other. A small detail which Levi probably wouldn’t have noticed if he weren’t looking for it then.

As he preoccupied himself and reflected over the small details that could have told stories of the people around him, that natural reflection to one own’s self had him a little too focused, a little too fixated.

The door to the waiting room slammed behind him and the trance disappeared as quickly as it came and as silently as a bubble that had just been popped.

Levi found himself irritably following the sound of the footsteps that came right after the slam of the door. It reverberated across the quiet and tense room, so loudly that if Levi did look around him, he would have realized he wasn’t the only one who had been so abruptly disturbed by it.

“Aaaand... My rounds are over for today,” The man said looking not at all guilty for that rude awakening. He wouldn’t have known anyway, and as Levi looked towards the front where the man had settled by the nurse’s desk, he might just have been the only one in the room rudely awakened by that sound.

“Ah, Doctor Jaeger, That was quick,” the nurse commented a little too pleasantly for Levi’s taste.

“Not too busy of a morning.” The man said, or as Levi soon deduced, was Mr. Jaeger. He recognized that irritating voice and as he looked up at the man, taking in the gruff features, the blond hair and beard and the rounded glasses, he quickly grasped for the name.

Zeke Jaeger. He hadn’t even said the name out loud just yet, but somehow he tasted venom. Levi though had enough awareness of his surroundings and his own ability to quickly yet correctly guess names to have kept silent. Regardless, he continued to watch as Zeke lowered his voice, possibly whispering something about going out for a drink and some dinner with the nurse in front of him. He found himself silently judging that audacious invasion of privacy as Zeke looked over at whatever paper was on the teacher’s desk.

Ackerman?

If Levi had actually been a little more aware of his surroundings, he would have realized Zeke did not at all say the name loud enough for him to hear. It was the result of Levi having watched too closely as Zeke enunciated those syllables, having noticed as the nurse made eye contact with him and having heard peppers of conversations about a jumper and an injury.

“Oh… An Ackerman? Who does high jumps?.” Zeke confirmed it himself, as he once again spoke a few decibels louder, obviously with the intention of making himself heard.

It wasn’t anything new. The past few months, Levi started to realize that at the least, many people in the local scene were familiar with him.

“My brother’s best friend is an Ackerman too and she started jumping recently.”

“I don’t have any relatives who jump,” Levi answered, in an attempt to shoot that attempt of a friendly interaction down.

Zeke stared at him, looking surprised. “You sure? With how quickly she picked it up, I thought she should have been related to you.”

Levi kept silent, making no effort to look open at all to conversation. Somehow, Zeke didn’t seem to get the hint.

“She’s been sweeping their interhigh competitions since the start of autumn… With the pace at which she’s going, she might even replace you.”

Levi had gotten used to those types of comments, hearing them as whispers the few times he went out, seeing them on a few forums as people discussed his injuries. He shouldn’t have been at all bothered by the statement, having shifted his attention in life to things which weren’t jumping

The blond man in front of him had been crass and blunt and Levi was starting to feel the beginnings of a bad mood. The irritability only worsened even as Levi tuned out the blond doctor. His mind went elsewhere, as he instead decided to seethe silently at the insensitivity of that statement.

                                  A Tale of Two Slaves

Eventually Levi did get a break from that one-sided conversation. But the countdown to that break was slow and painful. He only noticed as he struggled under the trappings of that long and excruciating wait how long it really took for minutes to count down on a digital clock.

An eternity could have passed before Levi was called from the waiting room. As soon as the clock struck ten, Levi could not help but be more than slightly annoyed that she had been late.

If you’re early then you’re on time. If you’re on time, then you’re late. Any other day, Levi would have acknowledged the hypocrisy of that statement since although he was always early to training, he was never that religious when it came to academics. Having just bounced back from such an excruciating exchange with Zeke though, everything had just been pissing him off more than necessary.

It was almost remarkable how he managed to nod in return at the woman who met him at the exit of the waiting room. But Levi soon realized, as the anger quickly dissipated from inside him, she seemed like an old friend more than a stranger and like for all people, as long as there was history between them, he could save a little more patience points.

The woman who helped him up and led him to the room ahead was shorter than him yet had a way of handling herself that made Levi guess that she was at the least, a university student.

Levi didn’t need to guess anything else. Somehow, her name, her personality and the familiarity had all been somewhere in his head.

She cocked her head to one side in greeting and spoke up. “You can call me---”

“Petra,” Levi said. Somehow, he just knew her name. He had been inclined to complete that statement, only to make more real the nagging feeling in his head as soon as he had noticed her enter the room.

Petra’s eyes widened in shock. “Yes, how did you know?”

“It’s on your nametag,” Levi answered almost automatically, thanking the heavens she was wearing a nametag.

“Yeah, my bad. I get a little absent minded at times,” Petra patted her own head and gave Levi a wry smile.

Petra was hospitable. And when Levi thought that exact statement, he couldn't help but think how the word 'hospitable' had fit her so well. It was in her presence. She had this special talent, of finding ways at least to add color to the stark white hospital walls and the overly sanitized tiled floors underneath.

It could have been the tone or it could have been her word choice as she rattled off what could have been an outline of his physical therapy regime. As Levi did figure out, it could possibly have been the unique enthusiasm she had towards the whole patient recovery process

"So you're my physical therapist?" Levi asked. He never really did pick up what she was saying. He had heard enough about leg raises, timings on when to remove casts and knee bends that he at least guessed she knew enough about them to be one.

Petra though was quick to shake her head. "No actually. After college, I have plans of taking the exam. Then after that, I’ll be a physical therapist. I’m just taking advantage of this internship to learn more about the occupation.”

“It suits you,” Levi said. He kept his own comments brief. At that point, he did start to lose a little bit of awareness of his surroundings. His thoughts flew slowly back to his dreams.

Those first two encounters in the hospital had been two missing puzzle pieces. The stories had been an incomplete puzzle set of words and pictures and as he put it all together in his head, he couldn’t help but note how vivid the memories actually were. It took all his strength not to react, not to bolt out then and there, and go back home, to fill in the gaps on his laptop.

He put two names on his phone.

Zeke Jaeger. Petra Ral. Levi could have sworn there was more to remember and to write about.

And who did Zeke mention then? The other Ackerman? The other jumper?

The dreams were faint, as faint as the image an incomplete puzzle would make. Some parts were clear and vivid like a scenery behind a newly cleaned window. Others were hazy, his mind having filled up those gaps with blurry images. But the other Ackerman was there, and she moved fast enough to justify those blurs in the scene. Back when they fought the war, she flew in those cables much faster than he and Hange had.

I am strong. I am stronger than all of you.

                                       A Tale of Two Slaves

The pain that came with his first physical therapy session was excruciating and it only served to further aggravate the anguish and his eagerness to get home before the sceneries in his head faded into faint memories of something else.

He managed at least to keep himself in a good in-between, by repeating the mantra of that other Ackerman to himself as he went through each and every exercise.

They had started off slow, as slow as a walk in the park maybe, a few stretches here and there. While doing some of the stretches and the warm ups, he did wonder if he had attended the right therapy session. Some of the warm up exercises had nothing to do with his knee after all.

The actual challenge came when Petra and the physical therapist he had failed to get the name of, had him sit down. As soon as Petra unwrapped the brace and pulled it from underneath him, Levi felt the weight of his injury almost instantly. It didn’t help at all that he was looking right at it.

“We’re going to try bending it a bit. Maybe put some weight on it if we have some extra time” The physical therapist’s words felt ominous.

The surgical scars and the healed wounds on his knees from more than two months ago only served to rattle Levi a little more. He had avoided looking at the scars many times before during meetings with Erwin and Hange. The few times Hange did pull and prod at it, he had it stretched out on some pillow.

It was fragile. And it felt unnatural. There in front of him then, it was dangling from the exam table, gravity pulling it down from underneath. Levi swore that if he tried hard enough he probably could imagine it completely disconnecting from his body at that moment. And maybe if he did move it, attempt to stand up without the confines of a knee brace as support, it might just fall off.

“Hey, it happens to the best of us,” Petra said.

No, it doesn’t happen to the best of us. In the room at least, there were at least five other people struggling to do something so simple as to bend a knee. But Levi could have sworn, in the outside world he was surrounded by people who wouldn’t think twice about bending their knee.

“Just bend it as far as you feel comfortable.” Bullshit directions. Levi had to admit, he wasn’t comfortable having it bend at all. Just the sensation of having it dangle so easily in the air, at the mercy of gravity underneath was already unsettling.

Was it a challenge then? To get it to bend as far as he could?

The directions of the therapist were flawed and Levi naturally opted for a flawed response as well. The process of bending his knee had been slow and excruciating. Levi found himself closing his eyes a few times, finding some sort of a rhythm in the faint sounds of the heater in the room, the murmurs from all the way across the room.

Or maybe a mantra? From someone a little too familiar. I am strong. Stronger than all of you. Another Ackerman.

And the way Zeke had mentioned it was grating. Was it a challenge? A threat? Was it supposed to be pushing him to go further?

It could have been Zeke or it could have been that phantom Ackerman that had been a motivation at that moment. But something then had Levi’s heart racing, his mind going in circles.

I’m strong too. I’ll get out of this rut. He thought to himself, a weak yet still effective act of protest. It worked both as a catalyst for a burst of motivation and an odd source of rhythm. The flexibility of bending came in slow, steady but continued attempts. The rush of adrenaline came halfway through.

A few minutes later, he was sweating and maybe he had been shaking a bit before that. When Petra had mentioned the optimistic progress and the plan to at least attempt to put weight on his bum knee, Levi was quick to comply.

And maybe a little too reckless. They had least helped him next to a wall, a good place at least to lean his body in the off chance he did lose control.

“One foot forward then one back.” The therapist guided.

As he watched the therapist simulate that same position, Levi quickly followed suit. He remembered, he had put some weight on his leg. Back then the brace had kept his knee stable.

At that moment, the brace was off, and it would be his bum knee, exhausted from the prior exercises taking the full weight.

I’m strong. Levi repeated to himself. Bending wasn’t an issue before. He had been bending his knees, possibly before he even knew how to walk. It should have been nothing, The excitement of a while ago, the adrenaline rush, pushed him further. It had him so seamlessly balancing the weight from the back of his foot, to the foot in front.

And maybe his knee had been bending farther in, the weight of his body on it. Somewhere along the way he did start to feel the beginnings of a dull pain.

I’m strong. To keep going, Levi had to find an escape. Stronger than all of you. It was easy at least, to leave the movements to his procedural memory as he distracted himself with his own musings, willing himself not to forget what he had wished to write down.

Where did they all fit? The Beast Titan… The Survey Corps… The War… The Alliance?

“Levi, I’m sorry I’m late. The test ended later than I expected…” She came as a faint voice, but Levi was too far gone to hear it.

He had only felt her presence then, when the physical therapist called a break, when he had collapsed on the floor in exhaustion, his knee throbbing, his breaths coming in heaves. He only realized she had been watching for a good long while when he looked up to see the concern etched in her face as he caught her gaze.

“I’m fine…” He at least managed to say that much before he closed his eyes, allowing that few minutes of rest to gather his thoughts and steady his breaths.

“You shouldn’t have pushed yourself too hard. This is just your first session,” Hange said from right next to him.

He still had enough energy to process those words at least.

                               A Tale of Two Slaves

That night, Levi gripped his dream catcher a little tighter and pressed it close to the back of his phone as he scrolled through google links on the other Ackerman.

It hadn’t been hard to find her at all. Zeke’s tirade that morning had been more than a guide enough.

High school. Ackerman. High Jump. Those were the only three keywords he needed to figure out the whole name of that missing Ackerman. For a moment, he had expected to find his own articles, and had braced himself for the pain of sifting through old articles about himself in between looking at hers.

It turned out Mikasa Ackerman had been the talk of the high school high jumping scene for a while, and she had been the topic of at least 90% of the articles he was scrolling through on Google.

A few times they did allude to the other Ackerman. The older articles heralded her as a successor to the rookie Levi Ackerman, the newer ones that were dated past his injury called her the brand new Ackerman, a replacement.

A replacement to damaged goods. Levi had to add that part himself, an attempt to make a joke out of his shitty situation as he closed that last article. “Mikasa Ackerman,” Levi repeated those words so quietly to himself as he dropped the dreamcatcher haphazardly onto the table in front of him. It had been useless at that moment. Or maybe at the least it had been the reason he felt a little too frustrated at having looked through too many articles that evening.

He looked to Hange who was sitting on the dining table, looking deep in thought on something on her laptop. Mid semester presentations for her thesis proposal were coming up, along with a few new exams next week. She had been conscious enough to point that out at least and Levi happily gave her the space she needed.

The turmoil inside him at first seemed difficult to pacify.  Just watching Hange so focused and deep in thought had helped somehow quell whatever unresolved tensions and feelings were settling in his stomach then.

Maybe if he talked to her, the tensions might just disappear altogether. Levi deemed it worth the effort at least. “Hange? You okay?” He asked

Hange’s head shot up and she looked straight at him almost instantly. “Sorry, how long were you calling me? I’ve just been a little too focused on my exam on Monday and the thesis presentations on Wednesday… I don’t think I’ve been in the right mind for a while…”

Levi saw it in the way she looked at him, she hadn’t been focusing on his eyes. It was as if she were still probably seeing whatever words or numbers she was studying. She had been like that the past week since the line up of the thesis presentations were released along with the midterms schedules for all the exams.

Their kiss, their one night in the bedroom almost forgotten. Levi was sure though there was something that had been bothering her, maybe something that extended beyond academics.

I can ask about that after finals. Levi thought to himself, pushing aside that bout of concern. He could start with a light question at least, which didn’t involve Hange too much. “Have you heard of Mikasa Ackerman?”

“Mikasa Ackerman? The high school high jumper?” Hange asked. “Maybe I have been following her too… Lately...”

“She’s really good apparently.”

“Her jumping positions reminded me a lot of yours, so she had been fun to watch. I always did want to ask… Is she related to you? I did some research but I don’t see much which connect you both other than a few articles comparing you as jumpers and maybe speculating a relationship.”

Levi shook his head. “I never heard of her… Until today… A doctor mentioned her back in the hospital before my therapy session.”

“She only started making waves last month when her school made it to the regional competitions. No one really follows the district and the interschools… And apparently she only started jumping recently, during summer and she only started breaking records during the regionals,” Hange said. “That is… According to what I’ve read up on her.”

“So, you have been following her?”

“I still watch videos during study breaks,” Hange admitted. “And she just broke a few records a few weeks ago, of course they’d show up in my feed.”

“And you didn’t feel the need to ask me about it before? About an Ackerman doing the same jumping positions I did? You didn’t want to talk about it?”

“I thought of asking you about it maybe after exams. Besides, do you want to talk about jumping? After everything that happened?”

Levi put his phone down beside him and looked up at the ceiling above him. Of course he wouldn’t have heard of her until then, he had purged himself of all track and field news since the injury. The tournament with Nanaba and Mike and the round of research on Mikasa have been two exceptions and the feelings after that had only reminded him why he had spent his days actively making the effort not to think of the life he used to have. "I told you I'm fine," he said. He half meant that part at least, the writing had helped.

"No you aren't.”

Levi found himself shocked by how certain Hange’s tone had been. And for a second, maybe he had been a little irritated at the audacity of it all. Who was she to assume how he felt? But the surprise and the irritability had him silent and listening. Hange always had a reason for her conclusions. She never made assumptions so easily, he had known her enough lifetimes to be sure of that.

“There's a certain sadness to knowing you can't do what you used to before.” Hange continued. “I think everyone feels it, even a bit."

"A certain... sadness?" Levi asked.

"Wait, that does sound vague... Lemme think of an example." Hange paused for a second, looking up in thought. "Like maybe if you imagine people who’ve been skating or people who've been playing instruments their whole childhood. When they stop training or practicing these things altogether, these people can feel themselves lose their motor skills or their thinking skills that got them jumping double axels or playing arpeggios or pulling off vibratos like they’re second nature. And when they come back to it years later, I’m sure everyone feels the sadness or some sort of a frustration, looking back at their old self and processing the realization that they can’t bring their body or their mind to do something as effortlessly as they had done it many years before. Processing how they ended up so weak, so stupid after abandoning their old passions for so long."

“What if I’m an exception?” Levi challenged, still a little annoyed at such an assumption and at such a long unsettling tirade.

Hange shook her head. “You’re not. For a while, I wanted to entertain the possibility that maybe you and I are exceptions, maybe we can easily jump from one passion to another. When I was watching you during therapy though. I saw the terror in your eyes, the frustration, the sadness. ‘Why isn’t my body moving the same way it used to?’ Maybe you don’t want to think back to jumping because you don’t want to see how quickly your body has forgotten the motions, how quickly it had lost the flexibility and the strength to carry you over the two meter bars…” Hange trailed off. She avoided his gaze and for a while she had been staring at the blank wall in front of her. For a second after that, she did look to him, and there was a glint of realization in that. Realization at what she had just implied possibly. "But you know what, you might just be an exception. Maybe I’m just projecting." Hange added a second later.

Levi was sure though from the quick change of tone that accompanied those last words that Hange probably didn't mean it. On top of that, having heard Hange's small lecture, Levi almost immediately realized he wasn't at all an exception.

Her voice had been light as she mentioned that last sentence. It could have been a thoughtless comment. Hange didn’t make too many thoughtless comments though. “Projecting?” Levi asked.

Hange let out a short light laugh  “I’m talking too much, I should go back to work…” Her words seemed like a band-aid, a lazy coverup for whatever emotions had supported such a tirade in the first place.

Projecting? There was a reason behind that word use and Levi was more than eager to press on it.

Hange wasn’t listening anymore though. She was buried once again in whatever subject she had chosen to study for that night. She was in work mode again and she had gotten back to that mode as quickly as she had fallen out of it.

All questions can wait until after her exam week. Levi told himself. The word ‘projecting’ had stayed though. Hange’s words had left its mark and maybe it did have Levi reflecting on his own feelings, his own fear and his own frustrations at his regressing skills, the painful awareness of his body that was slowly forgetting the motions he had built over years. At the end of that tunnel of reflection, he did end up thinking back to that word.

Projecting. She had to be feeling something for herself to say something like that right?

Hange what are you projecting?

And that at least distracted Levi enough, enough for him to ignore the dull pain in his left knee, channel his focus elsewhere. The next few days, having been left alone in the apartment while Hange went about classes, lab work and library visits, Levi did manage to channel his energies to academics or to filling his gaps in his own stories: Levi Special Squad, the Beast Titan and something about some new rookies in the survey corps.

The pain in his knee never left though. It was nagging and annoying like a cavity. It was a pain Levi had assumed would disappear in time. His left knee had always been painful since the injury.

Yet, maybe his left knee had started to get a little frustrated at Levi’s negligence. Maybe it had started to get angry. It was a creature and Levi soon realized, it was a monster that demanded attention.

The night it demanded his attention so stubbornly, so angrily., it did it through sharp pains that coursed through him like bolts of electricity, it did it through a crushing sensation that left Levi almost unable to breathe.

And maybe it did have Levi hallucinating----Or could it have been dreaming--- of having saved one of his soldiers from being eaten by a titan.

                                      A Tale of Two Slaves

“Connie!

“Captain!”

In his dreams, he had been too out of breath, or maybe a little too distracted to have reacted at the crushing pain that had spread through him like bolts of lightning. The dream was hazy that Levi doubted whether he had been completely rooted in anything or not.

He had been flying. He had been in pain. And he had been pushing past the pain, slicing at a titan in every direction. And when he had seen one of his soldiers unconscious, about to be eaten by a titan, he had jumped in between the titan and the soldier so instinctively, so desperately that the in-between had been a blur. He found himself in the midst of an excruciatingly painful ordeal. He gritted his teeth, biting back any attempt to scream. For god knows if he screamed, he might just run out of energy, he might just pass out.

When he woke up to the dark room though, he processed almost naturally the fact that the circumstances his reality had offered him were different. The view in the middle of the night, the faint sound of cars had been different. He wasn’t in a battle field and as if his body had been completely aware of that, it did push past his attempts to subdue any reaction.

Even before he realized it though, he had been screaming. Only when his throat burned and the sounds faded into a whimper, only when the tears started to run down his face, only when he closed his eyes and keeled over, a pathetic reaction to the bombardment of stimuli, did Levi realize the pain of having his leg almost bitten off by a titan was still there.

“Levi! I’m here. What’s going on? Are you okay?” Hange was right next to him. Beyond the pain, that was all he could process.

Hange hadn’t been there in the dream. God knows where Hange had been when he was flying from titan to titan. God knows where Hange had been when he found himself, jumping in between his fellow soldier and the titan that had lunged to eat him.

And god, it was painful. Even past the dream, even when he started to realize that Hange was right next to him at least in the dark room at 3am. The pain stayed and it was crushing his knee, it was leaving him unable to even take any sort of a decent breath, his own coping mechanism reduced to ragged breaths in between tears.

“Levi, breathe…”

How pathetic where his own breaths sounding for Hange to have to coach him like that?

“Oh god, Levi, we might have to get you to a hospital?”

How pathetic did he look for Hange to have to suggest a hospital visit? When she helped him up at least, when she slung her free arm over his shoulder and helped him to a sitting position, he did at least feel the unnatural weight on his left knee. What was going on?

Everything after that, came as a hazy dream. As hazy as the fight against the many unnatural looking titans. In that dream, Hange had been absent for some reason he could not yet comprehend. And Levi found himself trying to push it away, instead focusing on the Hange in front of him who had put a blanket over him, who had dialed a number on her phone and who was rattling off medical jargon to someone on the phone.

“Erwin… I…” Why would you need to call Erwin at three in the morning?

After that, Hange had helped put a hoodie over him, she had called one more number. And within a few minutes, Levi found himself lying down on a taxi, half conscious, only hanging on by a thread at the view of Hange under the dim light of the taxi and the city lights.

Somehow, he was terrified of falling asleep again. Hange hadn’t been there in the dream. And she might just disappear if he closed his eyes. As he unwillingly held on to the crushing pain in his knee and the view of Hange who sat next to him on the taxi, he was awake. Only barely, but barely was enough to not fall into another world of dreams, a world of wars and a state of complete chaos and confusion.

Eventually, he lost consciousness but it had been a gradual process.

He had lost some sense of time along the way, his body having been too focused on Hange. The darkness in the taxi had quickly shifted to the stark white of the hospital as he was helped onto a stretcher. Then along the way, he may have heard Erwin’s voice rattling off something about a swelling knee that was crushing his joints and a knee aspiration.

Then there was something about painkillers, an IV, a slight pain in his hand before everything enveloped him again. Maybe at his peripherals, Hange had been by his bedside.

It was a huge improvement at least from the messages of his own dreams. And maybe it was relief that finally had him letting go of his tight yet weak grip on reality. The crushing pain on his knee hadn’t been from a titan biting it off. Hange’s absence in the war had only been a dream.

The last few things he had processed then before completely letting the darkness enveloped him, may have been the sound of a laptop opening next to him, a few wires pattering on the floor below, the sound of the mouse and finally, the relaxing rhythmic clacking of the keyboard..

Hange was right next to him and she wasn’t leaving anytime soon.

                                          A Tale of Two Slaves

“Sorry.” It came out as a croak but Levi was still hoping she heard it. Despite the haziness of the first few moments as he opened his eyes to the light streaming into the hospital room, despite the discomfort which came with a dry throat, it had been Levi’s first instinct to apologize.

Hange looked worse off than last night. He at least picked up enough images of her to know that there was a stark difference between the Hange of a few hours ago and the Hange then. The laptop hadn’t moved, it was still on the table next to his bedside, just like he had guessed it to be having fallen unconscious to the sound of the clacking of the keyboard.

Right then and there, Hange’s hair fell in chaotic waves, her glasses askew. And compared to last night where he saw panic, in front of him, he saw calm etched on her face, an ominous calm that somehow seemed even more alarming.

“Hange,” Levi said a little louder. The concern he felt only gave him the motivation to push past the discomfort of having just woken up. “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you saying sorry? Hadn’t everything to this point been my fault?” Hange’s voice was soft, reflecting the ominous calm. It was cold, maybe even frozen. “"The reason the fluid built up in your knee was overexertion apparently. They’re guessing it was the physical therapy session last Saturday." Hange looked away. "I can't help but think... If I didn’t bring you to the tournament or talked to you about jumping , maybe you wouldn’t have pushed yourself too hard."

Levi had listened closely and he could have sworn he heard a crack in her voice. “But the fluid is gone right?” He asked. He noted that his knee was numb and to his relief, the pain had devolved into a dull ache, similar to the one he had been dealing with the past month. Not at all as alarming as it had been the night before.

Hange shrugged. “Maybe it’s the painkillers or maybe it’s the fact that they drained the wound. But don’t count your eggs before they even hatch. Your back to square one. All progress, out the window. Fuck this. Fuck all this. And you wouldn’t have been in this damn situation if he hadn’t fucked up way too many times. Was I pressuring you to jump? Was I pressuring you to recover quicker? Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned Elijah, or maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned MIkasa? Maybe I shouldn’t have let you go to that fucking meet in the first place.”

Levi kept quiet. Watching what had been Hange, leaving her laptop open on the table, watching her pace around the room, avoiding his gaze as she fell into her soft tirade had been unsettling. Even he couldn’t tell how it was making him feel. “It’s over. It happened. So many things had happened at once, it couldn’t have been anyone’s fault.”

“Fucking hell Levi, when I’m supposed to be writing about your injury, when I’m supposed to be writing every single bout of mini progress, writing out the mechanics of the injury… I can’t help but see… you were in no condition to jump. You were exhausted, your wounds from the first time we met were far from healed. But for fuck’s sake, if I had told you to wait it out a week, instead of letting you do jump after jump, maybe you’d be in class right now or maybe you’d be preparing for your next tournament… I don’t wanna write this anymore. I don’t wanna reduce whatever is going on inside you to a fucking case study.” Hange slammed her hand on her keyboard, and sat so violently on the chair, she had pushed it a few inches back.

“You need to graduate,” Levi said. What will Erwin think? What will your parents think?

“At this point, who cares? I’m miserable. I can’t fucking get anything written. I write a paragraph, I get self conscious and I delete it. I write out my interpretation of the numbers, of my findings, my gut wrenches then I delete it again."

“Take a break?” Levi weakly suggested.

Hange had laughed at that. The reaction came out of nowhere and Levi found himself speechless and maybe a little confused. Take a break? That had seemed like a natural suggestion. He had at least spent a good few seconds thinking in between listening to Hange’s rant to have come up with such a suggestion.

Either way, from the way Hange had laughed it off and slammed her laptop close, from the way she had sat back on the chair and looked at nothing in particular, the way she had avoided his gaze through the whole tirade and the fit that had followed, Levi was sure that had been the wrong thing to say.

A little ashamed at his own ability to have come up with something a little more comforting, Levi kept quiet. And for a second, he looked up at the own ceiling above him, and maybe distracted himself by appreciating the view from the wide hospital window, following the birds that were doing some sort of dance in the sky

For a moment, he did forget about Hange. She hadn’t helped at all to make herself any memorable, having kept silent.

The silence in that moment had been too peaceful, had been too otherworldly that it was only natural that it would be broken by even the softest and steadiest things.

Like an off-rhythm knock on the door.

“Hange?”

Levi recognized the voice even before his head popped up from behind the slightly opened door. “Moblit?”

Levi looked towards Hange. The latter sat unmoving on her seat, her head bowed down, her face unreadable. Even as Moblit opened the door a little wider and approached her, she hadn’t moved at all or even looked back to greet him. Levi bent over to get a better look at her and saw panic. A type of panic he had never seen before. Panic, confusion, maybe a little urgency. “Hange? Moblit’s here.” Levi managed to say. He kept his voice gentle, a natural gesture having to process Hange’s face at that moment.

“Hey Hange. Erwin told me you’d be here. The others were worried about you--- I was worried about you. You’re supposed to be presenting now."

Hange stayed silent. From what Levi could see, her face was frozen. Was that panic? Shock?

Moblit continued. "I explained your situation… They said they could push it back until this afternoon...You think you can make it?" Moblit paused as he got closer to her, as if waiting for her to say something. He had his phone out,as if ready to call the panelists at any moment.

"Hange. Go to the presentation," Levi said. It was difficult to bend over and make eye contact with her with her head bent down, her eyes downcast. He kept his words firm, hoping at least that was enough to reach her.

“I can’t…” She managed to say. She left her mouth half open, as if she had expected to say something after. She looked back up at Levi, then bit her lip. Levi could have sworn that was the first time he had seen her in such a loss of words yet at the same time, struggling to get something out.

“Hange, go. I’ll be fine…”

“You don’t understand, I can’t… present.”

“Hey, I’ll help you set up. We have until tonight.” Moblit scooched beside her on the table and typed out her password.

“No, you don’t get it, I have nothing…”

“Hey, I’ll help you get a powerpoint. We can revise your manuscript together. That’s what friends are for,” Moblit pressed as he pushed the laptop towards Hange. “Come on, type out your password.”

“No Moblit, there’s nothing in here. It’s over. I’ll try again next year.”

“It’s too early to give up Hange, remember how fast you got Elijah’s data processed? It helped me a lot.”

“You don’t get it do you?” Hange pulled the laptop towards her and angrily typed what could have been the password. The laptop booted to life and from where he sat, Levi made out the characteristic log in tone of the computer. “There’s nothing in the document. Just the introduction. No preliminary results. No observations. Nothing.”

Levi couldn’t see the screen from where he sat. But he did see the flashes of a changing screen through Moblit’s eyes. He could guess the results from the way Moblit’s jaw dropped and the way Hange just avoided both their gazes, keeping her eyes downcast.

Levi maneuvered himself to the side of the bed, getting Hange’s laptop at arm’s reach. His leg protested the action but that was the last thing on his mind. God forbid, what Moblit was seeing at that moment could have been Levi’s first assumption.

Hange… Didn’t you spend hours in the library getting everything written out?

Didn’t you spend whole days outside working in the lab?

Didn’t I fall asleep every night to the angry clacking of the keyboard?

Didn’t I wake up in the middle of the night to you in the dining room writing out your thesis?

She had been writing at least. The introduction, the review of related literature were all filled out. The methodology had been filled out. It was a far cry though from what she had made in high school. Each part had been furnished with links to sources, half completed sentences and maybe a few question marks here and there.

The observations and the results and discussions though, were all blank.

“Hange… You….” What were you doing? This can’t be it. Levi didn’t even know if he had said that last part out loud. His brain was on overdrive trying to prove his own quick conclusion wrong. He navigated through old versions of the document. His hands were quick, maybe they had been moving on their own and the PC couldn’t catch up.

A few times, Levi found himself tapping impatiently on the keyboard as the laptop loaded each version.

More links, more half completed sentences, and a very empty observations and results section. “We can get something written right? Help make a powerpoint? If we work together, we could get something presentable."

Moblit shook his head. He bent down next to Hange and spoke softly. “Does Erwin know about this?”

“I told him to just leave it to me… But I can’t. I can’t write this anymore.” Hange shook her head as she looked up at Moblit then up at him. There was some sort of a smile of resignation plastered on her face, reminiscent of the laugh of only a few moments ago.

That was what the laugh had meant when he had suggested the break.

Of course, she would laugh. There was no time for breaks. There was no time for work either. Hange was royally fucked.

Moblit left the room, neither Levi nor Hange asked for what. For a few more minutes, maybe for even an hour longer while Hange had been in her catatonic state, Levi did continue to look through her drafts, see what kind of sense he could make of the half complete sentences and the links to journals in her document with his limited knowledge on human anatomy.

His background had him very much unready to complete a thesis proposal on a technical subject he studied nothing about, let alone in the span of a few hours. Having been pumped with painkillers and sleeping drought only an hour before, his brain was in no state either to bullshit what he could. Despite all his desperate attempts to make sense of it, to write out something coherent, he found himself converting it back to the state he and Moblit had found it in.

Levi closed the laptop slowly and pushed it towards Hange. He was surprised and a little relieved to find that she did pull her weight, setting the laptop back on the table next to his bed.

Hange smiled at Levi and spoke up. “I appreciate you trying to do all this Levi but… I’ve given up already. I’m not getting this thesis done.”

It was a pained smile. A smile of resignation. A smile that was so clearly telling him that he had definitely wasted those last few minutes pouring through the versions of her document for nothing.

Levi took a deep breath and spoke up. “Then what’s your plan now?”