#…joy. plus I didn’t say that I want to be trans. if I could choose I’d be a slightly twinky male with icy pale blue eyes and large ears …

[raubtierfuetterung]

I feel like I feel the way a trans person feels about their biological sex about being a human.

[bewitching-elizabeth-olsen]

Press: “It’s a New Day”: THR Drama Actress Roundtable

THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER: Gillian Anderson had been dreading this. A tripod had arrived at her home in the U.K., along with a mess of lights and, really, just the thought of having to sit through an hour-plus on Zoom had her practically reeling. But then the woman who stuns as Margaret Thatcher in the most recent season of Netflix’s The Crown got talking — about pigeonholing and pay equity, about grieving and giving oneself over — and soon she didn’t want to stop talking. And neither did anyone else — The Queen’s Gambit‘s Anya Taylor-Joy, Pose‘s Mj Rodriguez, Genius: Aretha‘s Cynthia Erivo, WandaVision’s Elizabeth Olsen and Ratched‘s Sarah Paulson — at THR’s annual (virtual) Drama Actress Roundtable.

Let’s start easy. Complete this sentence: On set, I’m the one who is most likely to be …

GILLIAN ANDERSON Hiding in a corner. (Laughter.)

ANYA TAYLOR-JOY Pacing whilst moving my hands like this (waving above) trying to figure out what it is that I’m doing.

SARAH PAULSON Bossing everyone around.

ELIZABETH OLSEN Probably trying to make the crew laugh.

At the same time, you’re also inhabiting characters for long stretches and often they require you to go to dark or heavy places. What happens when a director yells, “Cut”? Do they come home with you?

MJ RODRIGUEZ I try to separate myself from Blanca as much as possible, especially [because we’re] dealing with immense trauma. So, when I go home, it’s Michaela Jaé going home, and I bring Blanca to the set. It’s easier that way because it can weigh on you otherwise and wash off on your family.

TAYLOR-JOY I wish I had as much control over it. For me, there are some characters that you can very easily snap in and out of and then there are other ones like Beth in The Queen’s Gambit. I’d worked back-to-back on two projects with one day off in between, so by the time I got to filming the show, I was exhausted and there was no energy to create a barrier. And that was potentially the toughest thing about the show, because it was a wonderful experience as an actor to be able to not have to reach for any emotion, but then you also have to go through the psychological warfare of figuring out, “Why do I feel so awful in the morning?” Like, “What is happening?” And then you go, “Oh, it’s not my feelings,” but I have to sit in them all day and I have to be aware enough to go, “You are not depressed, the character is depressed, and at some point that will leave you.” But I do think a bath every single night — being able to have the visual representation of washing yourself clean of something — helps.

OLSEN Regardless of what exactly the day requires of you, emotionally, you’re just tired. And so you try to be patient and professional and kind, and then when you go home, that’s when your fuse is just … smaller. (Laughter.)

TAYLOR-JOY You should date us, we’re fabulous.

CYNTHIA ERIVO I did, it was a real ugly cry. After playing [Harriet Tubman in the 2019 film], I went straight to see my mother in London and I don’t know what happened, but I just broke. You know the visual representation of shattering glass? That was what was happening to me. All the stuff I had to dig through to play her, all that heartbreaking stuff didn’t leave me when I finished, and it took time to just dissipate. And it was the same with Aretha — unfortunately, the pandemic hit when we were in the middle of shooting, so I couldn’t completely get rid of her during the six-month hiatus, and then I had to go right back into playing her. And it’s little things, like mannerisms, that stick with you. The lilt in her voice when she’s speaking to people. Like, that’s not me but I was stuck with that for a bit. And I was recording an album at the same time, so there was no space between one and the other. It took me a while before I could listen to an Aretha song again.

ANDERSON I certainly had that experience doing X-Files for nine seasons. I had a good couple of mini breakdowns during that, and at the end, could not talk about it, could not see it, could not see pictures, could not. I needed to immerse immediately in theater in another country. And then after a while, I was able to embrace it again, but when I started to embrace it, it was almost like I separated myself so much that I was looking at the image as if it was another person. When you immerse yourself so entirely as we can and we do for such long periods of time, there’s not going to be no consequence to that. Of course, there’s going to be consequence to that.

TAYLOR-JOY May I pose a question to the group?

Please do.

TAYLOR-JOY It’s so wonderful hearing you two talk about this, because I’ve always felt really crazy for the depressions that you go into after you leave a character and not being able to necessarily connect with yourself. And I’m really curious to hear what your relationship is with something being seen. Because when I first started working, I convinced myself that filmmaking was a very private practice with a private group of people and that no one was ever going to see it. And I thought I’d grow out of that, and I haven’t. Every project I have to sit myself down about two months after it’s finished and go, “People are going to see this and have access to it whenever they want.” How do you guys work [handle that]? Because for Queen’s Gambit, I had to go through a grieving period. It was grief, genuinely, to think, “Oh goodness, this thing that I loved so much is not mine anymore.”

ANDERSON I had that experience after doing Blanche in Streetcar [Named Desire] here in the U.K. and then in New York.

OLSEN I saw your last performance in New York. You were fabulous.

PAULSON Fucking phenomenal.

ANDERSON I felt like I’d lost my best friend. I was grieving. Some friends of mine in New York had a brunch for me the weekend after [I finished my run], and I arrived like a complete wreck. It was so profound. I also knew it was unlikely I was going to do it again because I knew that I’d probably lose my mind. I got really close. Like, I’d survived by the skin of my teeth and if I did it again out of ego or attachment or not wanting to let her go, there would be consequences. So I knew it was the end, and it was so sad.

ERIVO Do you know what’s so crazy? I listen to you and I’m like, “Oh my God, that’s what was happening to me during The Color Purple.” It was the last show and I started grieving in the show, knowing that it was coming to an end. There’s one last song and I couldn’t get through it. And then the show ends and I buckled under the sadness of it. But there was no way I could have continued playing Celie on that stage. It [had been] 14 months and I had to let her go. The line between me and her had disappeared. But to answer your question, Anya, I’ve never had an issue with people seeing things. I usually have an issue seeing it after it’s done.

PAULSON This happened when I did Marcia Clark [for The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story]. I felt a profound connection to her and I felt protective of her, and the experience had been so tectonic plate-shifting for me, both as a performer and as a human, and I thought, “If I watch it, I’m going to pick apart everything.” She was left-handed, so every time I use my right hand, I’m going to think, “God damn it, why did they use that?” So, the only way to protect myself from that is to detach from what the world will experience with it. And I’ve maintained that for a long time now — I really don’t watch [things I’m in] because I don’t have the strength, first of all, to bear the sight of my face and, also, I find it really confronting. The preciousness of the thing you were creating with these other people is what I want to be the indelible thing for me and not how it was edited.

TAYLOR-JOY Mm-hmm.

PAULSON All that does is make me furious because I don’t have the power to go in and go, “Hi, um, could you choose take six? It’s infinitely better.” (Laughter.) And when you don’t have that ability and you’re at the mercy of someone else’s opinion of what is the finest work that you’ve done, which doesn’t always line up with what you feel, it’s really jarring and you feel so powerless to do anything about it. So, I have to just sage it all out and let my experience be the only thing that governs the way I feel about it.

RODRIGUEZ When the first two seasons of Pose came out, I didn’t watch them at first because I was just so nervous about how the world would receive it. It was a story that a lot of people haven’t gotten to see, and it was a whole bunch of trans women of color finally getting their shot. It’s a lot of responsibility. And on top of that, it’s a story that’s filled with trauma and things that a lot of us trans women have gone through, so it was hard for me to watch all of those things back.

Gillian, in your career you’ve also been a champion for pay equity. But even as you were promoting a book you co-authored on female empowerment a few years ago, you acknowledged that you were nervous speaking up about being paid less than your male co-star. What do you think you were scared of, and how have the conversations for you changed since?

ANDERSON I just need to point out that I first fought for pay equity way back when it was audacious by anybody’s standards, because I was a nobody when we started to do that series. But when I really spoke up about it was when it happened again, four or five years ago, after the career I’d already had post-X-Files. We were going back to do another season and Fox came to me to offer, I don’t know, a 10th of what my co-star [David Duchovny] was being offered. That was the point where I was like, “Fuck this. I’m actually going to talk about this [publicly].” And since then, it hasn’t really come up. I mean, I haven’t worked with a lot of men, so that hasn’t been an issue. (Laughs.) I’m certainly tuned to it, and were it something now, I’d address it. But I have so much admiration for anyone who stands up for their right either to be paid or to be hired, period. And look, they weren’t going to fire me on The X-Files. The stakes weren’t that high. I put my foot down, not because the stakes weren’t high, but if they were going to fire me, some people were going to have some things to say about that. It’s very different for a young woman going into a job situation with a boss who’s overbearing and asking for a pay raise.

Sure, you had leverage.

ANDERSON Yeah.

For the rest of you, when have you spoken up in your careers?

ERIVO I mean, the obvious is I’m a Black woman, and that has a lot to do with how you’re paid, how you’re hired, if you’re hired, the way you’re hired — it affects everything. I’m lucky enough to have a team behind me that is brave enough to ask the questions I’d like asked: What I’m being paid compared to the leading man in the show, or if I’m being paid a lot less, whether or not they are willing to come up so it becomes equal. And about little things in my contract that just make it easier to exist on a set. For me, it’s about having the guts to stick with it and to keep asking and keep fighting. And there are definitely times where you’re like, “I am so exhausted from asking the same thing.” Like, if we could please have this makeup artist with me because usually there are no Black makeup artists on a set and you’re the only one who needs one, and I’ve had to have that fight every single time I’ve gone onto a set: “I need to hire these two people because they are the only people that understand how to do my face or my hair.” It isn’t about vanity, it’s about making sure that whoever I’m playing is represented in the right way because they understand how to work with my skin tone and my hair. But you keep sticking with it because it’s not just me having my way, it’s me being able to employ two other people. And then maybe I’m asking, “Can we have a DP who understands lighting that works on my skin tone?” So it’s constantly being OK with asking the questions. And there is a bit of fear, like, “Am I going to be seen as difficult?” And yes, there are times where I’ve had someone say they’ve heard I was difficult, but usually, it’s because I’ve asked a question that will make for a better surrounding or a better show. And if I keep asking the questions and if other ladies like myself keep asking the questions, and we keep trying to better our spaces, it just becomes the norm — because at some point it has to just become the norm.

Elizabeth, I believe you had a saying in your house growing up, “No is a full sentence.” When do you find you use it?

OLSEN I use it a lot. (Laughs.) I use it when I’m on set. I mean, I want to be a part of every department when I’m on set. I want to understand the schedule. I want to understand everything. I produced a TV show [Sorry for Your Loss] that didn’t get too much light of day because it was on Facebook, which, whatever … but as a producer on it, it was really important for me to be a voice of everything you’re saying, Cynthia, and have heads of departments feel like and look like the freakin’ world. And just from having a taste of that for two seasons, I can’t [go back]. So when I go to do Dr. Strange 2 in England, I guess I use it when I just can’t shake it even though [the production is] so much bigger than me. I don’t know, my opinions are vast and everyone hears them, from the first AD to the EP. I think I’m like a representative of anyone having a hard time on set. … (Laughs.)

PAULSON You’re the Equity rep, I love it.

OLSEN Oh my God. (Laughter.)

When you think about your careers, is there someone else’s that you look at and go, “Ooh, yeah, I’d love that”?

OLSEN Gillian’s, Sarah’s …

ERIVO Yeah, Sarah, you’re that for me. You’re fucking incredible.

PAULSON You saying that to me makes me want to cry because sometimes you feel like you’re doing this in a bubble and you don’t even know if anything you’re doing ever has any meaning or impact to anyone.

ERIVO It does. From my heart, it does. And I hope I get to work with you one day.

PAULSON I’d give my eyeteeth. (Laughs.) For me, it’s Gillian — somebody being on a TV program for a long time that’s wildly successful and then retreats to another country to be onstage, to reconnect yourself to the very things that inspired you and made you want to be a part of this. It all gets very confusing in terms of how to navigate [this business]because you do want to make a living, but you also want to follow your heart. And there does come a time where you can become quite depleted from the constant output without any input. And if you’re a woman of a certain age, which I certainly am, I feel like I’ve got one foot on one window frame and I’ve got the other one over here and I’m just trying to insist that they stay open for as long as possible. And some of that is beyond my control, but when I look at Gillian’s career I just go, “Well, I want that.”

ANDERSON Thank you for saying that. On the one hand, I feel like there is some degree of design, but I’ve also never really gone after things. And when I finished with X-Files, I didn’t know if I wanted to be on a set again ever. So aside from having grown up in the U.K. and wanting to go back, I knew it would take time before I could, if I was going to. And in London, you could move between theater and TV, and that was always my dream. But every actor has the thing that they’d want more than the thing that they have, and I’m a cinephile, and so I [wonder], “Why do I keep doing TV? All I want to do is do film.” And I’m still doing TV. (Laughs.) But I’ve had such amazing opportunities that, coming from Scully, I even questioned people, like, “Why are you offering this to me? What makes you think that I can do this?” I’ll also say that as soon as you have kids, kids are the priority. So, I say to people, “I’m gonna be such a pain in the ass for you to hire. But if you think I’m this person, I’m gonna need to work during this period of time and then have time with my kids. And it’s going to be expensive for you. If you are willing to do that, then I’m your girl, and if you’re not, you need to find somebody else.”

Anya, Queen’s Gambit became a global juggernaut. How have your opportunities and choices changed? Is there pressure to strike while the iron is hot?

TAYLOR-JOY I think I’ve always followed character and only recently did I start following directors as well, but it’s always been about, “Do I feel like I’m the right person to tell this story? Do I think I can tell this story correctly?” And if you look at something like Queen’s Gambit, it was not supposed to be the white-hot show; it’s a show about a girl that plays chess for seven hours, but I felt so compelled to tell that story. So, it sounds cheesy, but I really just keep following my heart. OK, wait, I take that back. Something I’m also learning is that you give yourself to this person for three to six months, and I never used to think about this before, but now I start thinking, “Am I ready to give up my life for this person? Do I need to tell this story so badly that I’m going to do that?” I try not to think about what other people will think, because it’s your life at the end of the day. And as we all know, you’re that [character] every hour of the day, and when you go home it’s difficult to let go of them, so you have to really love them.

Mj, you’ve talked about how significant this show was for you and for the visibility of the trans community. How have the opportunities being presented to you post-Pose changed?

RODRIGUEZ In the middle of the third season, I started figuring out my worth, and it’s scary. I was nervous. I didn’t expect to actually book my next job after Pose.

ERIVO I did.

PAULSON We all did.

RODRIGUEZ And see, that’s my insecurity and that’s something I have to fix. I didn’t think it was possible. To get an opportunity like Pose and have myself centered in the story and to end it with hope, and then to get another opportunity with an iconic actress [an Apple TV+ comedy co-starring Maya Rudolph] was surreal. But if I’m still feeling the need for protection as far as my Blackness, my Latina-ness and my trans-ness go, that means there is more work to be done.

Are there doors still not open to the rest of you? Parts you’d love to play if only Hollywood would see you that way?

PAULSON No one has asked me to do a comedy, and I’m a little frustrated about that.

ERIVO And you’re funny as fuck.

PAULSON I spend a lot of time in these worlds where I’m either running or crying or screaming or playing a real person and trying to get their physicality, and I’d really like to do a nice road picture with me and a couple of chicks.

ANDERSON Ooh, I’ll go with you!

PAULSON How about all of us just in a road movie — like, get a Winnebago and let’s go?

ERIVO I’m down.

RODRIGUEZ Yeah, count me in.

ANDERSON I’m 53, Sarah, and I’ve really only been offered comedy in the last three years of my life, and I don’t think that’s because I’m any funnier than I used to be. I think a lot of it is that people just couldn’t fathom it, whether it was that Scully was still in their minds or it was someone else, because I’ve played a lot of dark characters, too. And so they just weren’t coming. And then came [Netflix comedy] Sex Education — and I passed when it first came to me because I didn’t think it was right. It was my partner who proverbially dug it out of the trash.

ERIVO I’ve yet to see a Call Me by Your Name for a Black woman, I have yet to see a piece that allows a woman of color to be sensual and soft and loving and be loved. I’ve just not seen it, and I desperately want to experience that, just because I want to be able to be in that space of vulnerability and lilt. I really want to do that. And that hasn’t come my way. A comedy hasn’t come my way either.

RODRIGUEZ Same. It’s been so hard when it comes to trans women being loved in a sensual way, and I’d love to do something like that.

Elizabeth and Anya, to Sarah’s point, Hollywood likes to keep actors in a lane. How have you avoided that kind of pigeonholing in your careers to date?

TAYLOR-JOY I’ve been saved from a lot of things in my life from pure innocence and naivete, genuinely. My first movie was called The Witch, I got a script immediately afterward that was about, you guessed it, a witch, and I figured, “Wow, why do they want to see me do this again?” So, I was immediately like, “Can I not do anymore witch movies, please?” And my agent was like, “OK. Sure, whatever you say.” I wonder how many people agree with me here because I certainly want to please, but in order to please, I don’t have to give up myself, and actually it’s more important to please myself than it is to please anybody else. I’m giving my heart, my body, my soul, everything to this character, I’m not going to do something because somebody wants me to do it. That doesn’t make any sense and, also, it makes me miserable and then I can’t do my best work. And so if I feel the opportunities that are being given to me aren’t the right ones, then I have to stick my neck out and go, “Hey, I think I could maybe do this, if you’ll give me the opportunity to try.”

How about you, Elizabeth?

OLSEN [In the beginning,] I was just trying so hard to not be put in a box that that’s what was guiding my choices. I knew that I didn’t want to be an actor who was thought of as “youthful and beautiful” and whatever that attachment people like to put onto young women, and so I did everything in my power not [to be seen as] that. But I didn’t have my own pillars of why I wanted to do things beyond just the character. That started to solidify only in the last five years. So I made a lot of odd decisions [after theater school at NYU] because I didn’t know enough about film and the machine of it. Right, Sarah? You were there for that time. We were in Martha Marcy May Marlene, and I remember someone asked me, “You had Sarah Paulson with you, didn’t you know it could be a film people saw?” And I was like …

PAULSON You were like, “Who the fuck is Sarah Paulson?” (Laughter.)

OLSEN No, but independent cinema to me was just, like, going to Quad Cinema in New York and seeing a movie. The theater world is all I understood. So I feel like a moron for going back to theater only once in 10 years. And this conversation with Gillian right now is inspiring.

In light of Elizabeth’s concern about the trap of being perceived as “youthful and beautiful,” how would you all complete this sentence: I wish our male counterparts also had to …

OLSEN Deal with lighting and hair and makeup before doing press. I don’t know what I’m doing.

ERIVO Deal with people believing that you’ve lost your sexuality after the age of 30.

TAYLOR-JOY Had an understanding of what it was like to walk into a room and sometimes have to enforce yourself for people to take you seriously. That ability to just walk into a room and go, “I am valid, I own my space and everybody respects me” — it would be good if they knew what it was like to not have that.

ERIVO And on the flip side, to not have to deal with walking into the room and trying to make sure people aren’t scared of you when you get there.

What do you all know now that you wish you could have told yourself at the beginning of your career?

PAULSON I would like to have told myself that I didn’t need to excise myself from the experience. I was very focused on looking at other actors who had careers that I admired when I was first starting out and wondering what it was about them that made it possible for them to be chosen or employed and I’d often try, in an audition or a social setting, to mimic what I imagined was the desired effect, taking me out of the scenario. And there’s this beautiful Martha Graham-to-Agnes de Mille letter that I used to keep in a dressing room any time I was doing a play, about how there is only one you in all of time and space and that what you see and how you experience things is unique to you. And if you block it, the world will not have it. And as a young person, I thought, “Mute me, mute my opinions, my thoughts, my assessments and try to fill it with other things,” and now I think it’s the exact opposite, so I wish I had known that earlier. But I’ll take knowing it now [over] never knowing it at all.

RODRIGUEZ I would have told my younger self that my existence is worth it. When I was younger, I tried to fit into this mold of what a woman should do — you know, keep your legs crossed, always bow down to a man. But we don’t have to live in that world anymore. It’s a new day.

It is, and that’s a good place to end. Thank you all for sharing your time and your stories.

ERIVO I know we’re supposed to finish, but do you know what’s occurred to me as I’ve listened to every one of you? I remember where I was when I watched every single one of you — and I remember what I was dealing with or going through. I was watching you, Sarah, when I was shooting Aretha. I was watching you, Elizabeth, when I was in London on my own, and you, Anya, when I was in Atlanta. Mj, I remember watching a season of Pose while I was shooting The Outsider. And Gillian, I watched you when I was in a hotel with my partner outside of London. And I remember what happened. And so your performances aren’t just brilliant, your performances get to be Post-its in all of our lives, and so I thank you for that.

PAULSON That’s a very beautiful way to put it …

ANDERSON It also brings us back full circle to what Anya said at the beginning, which is, “Oh my God, I have to keep reminding myself that people are going to watch this.” But actually, thank God that people are watching it, because we’ve touched each other’s lives and numerous other people’s lives just by focusing on the thing that we love most.

TAYLOR-JOY And the importance of these conversations is the honesty, because it’s very easy for us to get locked into our own heads of this as an individual experience — “There’s something wrong with me,” or “Everybody else is doing really great and nobody else grieves their characters,” or whatever your version of that is in whatever industry you’re in. But having honest conversations with people who are willing to be vulnerable just makes me feel so much less alone.

PAULSON The next time you feel that way, text me. I’ll remind you. I’d also like to say that there’s this [perception] of women being pitted against one another and not being there for one another, and this conversation is diametrically opposed, in that what we are actually saying is that each of us has been buoyed by and inspired by the work of everyone here. So, I may not watch anything I do, but I sure as hell am watching all of you.

Press: “It’s a New Day”: THR Drama Actress Roundtable was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen

[jamesbi-canonbarnes]

Going mad ok so I understand Bucky is not the white wolf in the comics and has nothing to do with the person who goes by that moniker in the comics. If I thought we were going to get the actual white wolf story from the comics in the mcu it might make me feel Bucky can’t be called white wolf, but the thing is they have already been calling him white wolf, which leads me to conclude already either 1) they will never introduce comics white wolf anyway, whether they keep it a shallow nickname or possibly let Bucky take more of the story of white wolf and subsume/replace that character (thinking about Arnie Roth hours) or 2) they will treat it as a mantle that can be shared and passed on like the cap mantle and others. I find option 1 much more likely as I don’t see room for the comics white wolf in the mcu. If either, I have no problem with them expanding Bucky’s identity as white wolf, as this is a completely different universe than the comics, and they have ALREADY NAMED HIM SO. (Not that we can’t judge the mcu for choices we think are bad, we can. But divergence alone is not my problem).

I think the thing certain tfatws viewers are hitting on is that the show seems like it’s setting him up to take on a new name. In the first ep he literally says “I’m no longer the winter soldier.” Just from that and the strong subtext surrounding it, in order for him to properly hit his development/arc he would *have* to either *himself* choose a new “alias” name or explicitly/verbally accept that name again as his in healing but he does NOT, he’s called only “Bucky” and “Sergeant Barnes” in the last episode, and throughout the show he calls himself and is called “white wolf” (in the context of healing-restitution-reconciliation/invoking peace and rehabilitation/acknowledging his own goals) plus being called Bucky/buck/James/barnes etc. in varied but mostly neutral or at least averaged out to be neutral context. He is only called Soldat/ws by zemo and by strangers in madripoor iirc, and certainly not in the context of healing. And while I believe he either does call himself the winter soldier or strongly implies that at least in ep 5, it is again not in a context of healing but of self hate and fear, showing how he sees himself and how he has NOT reclaimed the name. His last statement on the fact is to Yori, where he says “he was murdered by the winter soldier.. and that was me... I didn’t have a choice.” *was* and “I didn’t have a choice.” But now that he does have a choice, what is the choice???? Closing the chapter on that era??? Seems like (sunset, right?). But it never textually hits either of the conclusions earlier laid out (choosing to reclaim the name or choosing a new name). This makes it feel like his development is unfinished, and IMO it feels like it doesn’t really make sense to leave it unfinished if he was going to continue using that name because he would only have to say like one sentence to tie it up, whereas any other name would take more than that. So it only makes sense narratively to leave it unfinished if he still requires further development, like a second season or a movie worth, to figure out his name (we know his name is very important to him- “it’s Bucky” “my name is Bucky” “my name is James Bucky barnes” “you don’t get to call me that” etc.) he has his chosen (reclaimed) person name, now he needs to choose (and/or reclaim) his hero name. We just saw him realize that saving ppl is what he wants to do (“[free] to do what?”->”be of service” -> “thank you for saving us”) (he now NEEDS a hero name/hero identity) and on the other side we saw him retraumatized when he stepped back under the winter soldier name in ep 3. The show frames his completing his amends as putting his past behind him (literally getting rid of it in the form of leaving the book and not returning to therapy) but it does not answer the question of what’s in front of him (besides Sam). We have seen him subtextually reclaim his prosthetic arm(using it for good in the last two eps and finding joy from it) AND his “white wolf” nickname(verbal reinstatement from Ayo and a happy physical response from Bucky), but NOT the “winter soldier” name. Even the arm is not the same prosthetic he used as Soldat but one that is inextricably wakandan, and therefore is not enough for me to be a symbolic stand in for the name.

Yes I agree that him reclaiming the name in the comics is healing and meaningful and could be the same in the mcu if they actually put in the work to draw that explicitly (which IMO they have not, and I don’t trust that they will) but it is not the only way to heal and move on, the same can be done by choosing his own new name, his own moral grounding, his own chosen family. (Ayo’s “you chose us. Chose me.”) there is not one right way to heal.

The thing is, the show did not address the name, and the arc feels unclosed due to that. It is annoying that they have him say he is not the winter soldier at both beginning and end (and middle w zemo in ep 3) and yet the title calls him that throughout. If he had specifically reclaimed that name in the show I would be perfectly happy with that, but he did not. The fact that they changed Sam’s name but not bucky’s when their journeys of healing through choosing heroism and finding a new identity are purposely paralleled feels off. It feels off because of the way they framed the show, and not bc I personally have an independent desire for him to change his name. (Although I do think a lot about chosen names from the perspective of trans healing, and I think that’s something to consider here). White Wolf is the option presented, and I can certainly see why people are hitting on it based on the text of the show.

If he eventually takes the name “White wolf” as his hero name I do agree it should have more build up/development and for me personally to accept it I would require a much deeper connection with wakanda than Bucky now has. Possibly we will get it in cap 4, possibly there are not plans to give Bucky real further development, only to keep him on as a sidekick. I don’t personally see him “earning” that name as IMO it would require a major shift away from being cap’s sidekick and into his own separate (distinctly not America-centered) storyline which is what I don’t see happening. But at the same time, mcu has already demonstrated a willingness to give shallow development for its choices, and this could be another example of that being telegraphed. Or who knows, maybe the above points that make his arc feel unfinished are just due to sloppy writing. I won’t rule that out, but I will appreciate if comics readers stop trying to gatekeep mcu fans excited about the possibilities of a universe that is literally not the same universe! It’s an au! The creators can and will change whatever they want. While we can of course judge those changes, I’m much less comfortable judging viewers for reading possibilities presented by the canon text just because the possibility represents a change from the comics.

TLDR MCU-only fans are not stupid for reading what was given to them in the text of the show they’re analyzing and coming up with a desire to have Bucky choose the name White Wolf as an alias. The choice to incorporate comics in your reading of an mcu property is a *choice* that is value-neutral and not a necessary step for either consumption or commentary.

[transsexualhamlet]

the many sins of tokyo ghoul :re

or: 13 reasons why :re is fucking terrible not clickbait

Disclaimer: I think no matter how long this post gets I’m missing something, so let’s just outline the worst ones. And I mean to be transparent, the only reason I actually read :re was so I could make this post... (and bc i wanted to see the what, five panels of hide) Well, I couldn’t stand hating it without evidence beyond hearsay and General Vibes. But I knew it was gonna be bad, I knew it was going to ruin me jesus christ. Obviously I’m not hating on people that like it, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with genuinely enjoying it (I do genuinely enjoy parts of it, and by parts i mean chapters 1-50 with exceptions and 75) I think it’s wonderful if you can derive joy from it (lmao) but I can say that through my lens in life, there’s so much fucking wrong with this goddamn fucking piece of shit manga and I feel the need to yell about it because i am ✨autism✨ so let’s get going (this is r e a l l y long just a warning)

tl;dr Ishida stay in your fucking lane

1. Transphobia and Homophobia:

alright here we are first off with the big one and if I had to choose, one of Ishida’s greatest sins here. It’s quite unusual in mangas like these to have any sort of representation for such things in and of itself, and yeah of course that annoys me, but having no represntation at all is like so much better than getting actively harmful representation. Most manga that aren’t specifically about those things shy away from those topics, and it’s tiring but it’s normal. You wouldn’t want a mangaka to try to write about something like that without experience or informed opinions. So I say if you can’t write something correct, just don’t write something like that in at all. Ishida clearly,,, does not get this.

And it’s not just the case of Mutsuki, who, well, gets it bad enough, there are three full fucking trans characters Ishida made like, just to shit on. 

Big Madame- god, made like that specifically to perpetuate the predatory trans woman trope jesus christ is Ishida friends with JK fuckface Rowling. Ah yes the ugly, human trafficking, predatory, pedophilic killer that tried to make their male child more feminine? Has a dick. Really? Could you be a single bit more transparent about your fucking agenda here? I really don’t have to say much here.

Kanae von Fuckwald- Technically Ishida says here that basically this bitch was just like??? Pretending to be a guy for years just to what?? I don’t even know?? Get together with Tsukiyama? Cause he’s fucking gay or something? I don’t even get it but like i read this post yesterday and that’s a whole ass thermian argument. It’s like “oh well this is fine because well this person’s not actually trans and therefore the representation thing doesn’t apply”... it’s useless. You created the character that way and you made it intentionally to for whatever way promote this idea that people would “pretend” to be a different gender and that eventually they’ll realize that it’s a “lie” and they never really wanted it. This is what you’re saying about the real people who are,,, actually trans? Jesus christ. Also thinking that a twink like that would be trans? God yeah trans guys can be feminine but buddy that’s clearly not what you’re going for here.

And of course, Mutsuki- There’s just... so much wrong here. I mean like. Before we even get into anything about his character and what they did to him let me just discuss his entire design. Buddy like if you had to choose one person in that show to be trans that’s the least likely one. Ah yes, the feminine one. With the androgynous haircut and the shy disposition and the physical weakness compared to the others. God that’s like, a fujoshi’s take on ao3 of what character should be trans. As much as yeah of course, trans guys can be feminine, they are in no way obligated to be such and you shouldn’t make them more so to be more “believably” so. Ask any actual trans person ever. A character like that is just perpetuating the notion of trans guys being inherently more feminine or trying to pretend to be otherwise.ThEn, of course, there’s the ridiculous sexualization, infantilization and fetishization of this character, going through a thousand plot hurdles to make him constantly stripped, put in girls clothing, chased by perverts, assaulted, ET FUCKING CETERA. Give him a fUCKING BREAK. Creating this character the way he’s portrayed in canon (including so called backstory of murdering parents because of sexual and physical abuse) is perpetuating a notion that someone would be a trans guy because of internalized misogyny and/or trauma instead of because they’re just... a guy. It’s just it’s just it’s just Really bad. Plus taking his character, demonizing him and making him like, supposedly love haise (which i Really hate for a thousand reasons, god that’s like, a parent and child type relationship they have there not romantic,,, god,,,) try to like fucking murder touka and stop seeing sense, and then just... return him to being infantalized. God. Jesus christ fucking goddamn it I love Mutsuki and he deserves better.

Oh yeah and then the homophobia, this one’s smaller because... most of the trans people are here to go “it’s gay... wait it’s not Really gay so it’s ok” but I would like to leave a small note here for all the gay characters who got thrown under the bus not just in re but in the original, like, you know, Nico and shit? I really do not know shit about Nico but all the things about Jason? God if I had a thing for one person that you shouldn’t try to portray as representation it’s Jason. IDK what’s up with him and Naki but god it wasn’t healthy. (i’d like to say here that i love naki and i think naki deserves the world but honey there are better heroes than yamori) Anyway yeah I think that’s also bullshit and Ishida should stay in his fucking lane. (or her i guess, i just feel like it’s probably a guy bc of just... so much sexism)

Ok, now that we have the big one out of the way-

2. The mishandling of portrayals of various mental illnesses:

I’m not an expert on this one like I can say about the gays TM but just like in general, the whole manga’s very messy and portrays a lot of gritty stuff, and Ishida clearly attempts to throw in some mental illness for fun, but god fUcking damn it they’re bad. I couldn’t really even give you examples bc it’s pretty widespread and i’m stupid, but it was really like trump throwing paper towels “and you get a demonization, and you get an infantalization, and you get a butchered character, and you get a fetishization-”

3. Ishida having no fucking clue how science works

This particular factoid led me to have a very hard time reading this manga because it went from being about like, yknow, torture and fights and crying and stuff to weird experimentation bullshit and mutated whatever and everyone’s a hybrid now I guess. When I heard this thing about the quinxes, I thought that made no sense, because I was like “yeah but wait,,, how tf does that work didn’t Ishida say earlier that kagune literally were fueled by human meat isn’t that like the entire point the ccg is against?” and then Ishida’s explanation of how they’re not just exactly like Kaneki is that “oh yeah well there’s like, metal around it, so it’s different.” OH YEAH OK THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE NOW, THANKS.

The thing is... there’s no way of actually regulating that. You couldn’t move a kagune unless it was attached to your cells, and if it’s attached man, it’s attached and it’s part of you. Also yelling “frame two” won’t like make it any bigger lmao, either you’re gonna have it based on theoretical science in this universe or you’re going to have a dumb supernatural magic pokemon fight deal. The whole thing makes no sense. The science issue isn’t just about this either, it’s also about how the entire thing basically undermines the point of the whole story. When you blur the lines between human and ghoul with little to no real rules or basis in real science, every rule kind of just becomes cheap plot convenience.

So the Quinxes can eat human food unless they use their kagune too much, alright, but Kaneki couldn’t eat human food before he’d even ever used his though the only difference between their bodies was this,,, theoretical metal thing?? And Haise... was never really covered, before he went black hair emo bastard and like vored Eto, did he eat human food like the rest of the CCG? He certainly cooked it. And the squad that lived with him wasn’t aware he was a ghoul until he pulled out the kagune. So I’d assume so, but then how could he have a kagune, how could he survive when his body still was like that?

Is it the RC suppressents? Then couldn’t he just have taken those and lived as a human the entire time? Is that all he fucking needed, is that the only difference between human and ghoul? It doesn’t make sense and the rules are bent so much they don’t function anymore. Ishida like write down your rules somewhere even if they’re bullshit, they shouldn’t contradict each other.

Damn man I’m not even going to go into the dumbass rules of the half humans or the special fast aging thing or the fucking,,, folded up cells deal,,, or the Imagination Kagune, or the fucking,,, Dragon, or the zombie ghoul apocalypse or the “whole new species made of just kagune” i don’t even have the time it is fucking ridiculous and I can’t even with it. Physics. Laws of physics. If not biology, at least follow physics Ishida??? Please???? And if you’re not you need to do that consistently??

4. character glow ups actually being character glow downs 

(with the exception of nishiki, he baby now, and akira, i think her development was valid af)

God, this one gets me every time. Touka was cool. Touka was fucking badass, she had a complex character with many motivations and wants, and in the original having her eventually kind of soften bc of Kaneki is valid. But taking her and turning her into like literally nothing but Pretty Housewife Yearning For Husband At War? God, kill me. She’s a strong person. She can like Kaneki without the guy being her only character trait. Also uh, Touka and Kaneki being a couple was valid before this change, now I honestly can’t stomach it. Like they were the kind of “both bisexual” m/f couple that we stan. No longer I guess.

She’s the most egregious example, but I’d also like to point out Juuzou, not everything they changed about him is bad, honestly we fucking stan his knife legs, but he’s kind of like a rip off L now? You got rid of his ~unhinged~, we do not stan. I’m on the fence about him bc i think that kind of is a valid transition to adulthood and I guess he’s grown up, but again, why change his fucking hair color? What is the explanation for this?

Also Hinami. I mean, I don’t really care about her a lot in general, but it’s weird to see her as like an adult when Ayato emo boy looks like exactly the fucking same and they’re like,,, supposedly the same age. 

There are definitely more I’m missing here. Honestly, Hide was valid. God him with his fucking burlap sack. With a fucking lenny face on it. I can’t with him. That’s so Hide. But there were some bad ones.

5. one hair color change was my limit, enough said

black white black and white black white more white god bitch get some variety

6. Showing me great new characters and then promptly ruining them

And you can tell this one’s about quinx squad, my favorite bastard children. God, I love them. They’re the only good things about Re other than Hide and Haise and like everything else, Ishida took them and went “what if i *guts*” god why. I love these kids with all my heart. Why. Why. Why did you do that to Mutsuki. Why as soon as Haise isn’t in the room they all get themselves tangled up with pedos. Why they gotta break up the squad. Why make all of them lose all the wholesomeness and lessons they learned from Haise. Why do you ruin them all with weird unreciprocated random crushes on each other when they’re like basically siblings. Why fuckinG KILL SHIRAZU HE IS THE APPOINTED CHIEF DUMBASS OF THE SQUAD WHY HIM. WHY. WITH SO LITTLE IMPACT. YOU COULD FUCKING MISS IT SO EASILY. THAT’S NOT RIGHT. AND KANEKI JUST FUCKING ABANDONS THEM BC HE HAS HIS MEMORIES AGAIN N O ? NO ACTUALLY NO.

7. the casual racism and sexism :)

i just :) can you stop having girls constantly bring themselves down for being female :) and making them be oversexualized, less full characters :) always in some way connected to a guy :) more weak and hurt more often :) my fucking god :) also yeah it’s way less prevalent but there were a few racist caricatures thrown in there for taste if you don’t know how to draw lips just don’t

8. Ishida being too much of a pissbaby for a real death scene

Basically: undermining the impact of “deaths” fom the first series while also randomly and badly killing off new characters. Oh that character that died in the original in a really cinematic way that made you cry and think about the meaning of life and how beautifully tragic this story was? Oh lol they’re not Actually dead. (x10) Doing that with Hide (at least in the manga, not the anime, god root A really did it with him but we’re not talking about that) was valid, seeing as I love him your honor and in the manga one of the lessons that his character hinges on was like in chapter 75 to live on instead of giving up even if it hurts and all that... (this is obviously kind of the opposite from root A where his character was like more about sacrificing for kaneki since kaneki had already done so much, i think both are valid but we’re Talking About The Manga) he was done well. That was right (even though i think they should have done More of it) but there were so many characters this kind of thing was done to without the proper adjustment in the handling of the messages given here. 

Like with Koma and Irimi, who,,, honestly should have stayed dead because their entire character arc kinda ended there and showed how they were sorry for their actions and this was how they were making it up. And then they just like... come back. And fight more. Really? This wasn’t the only instance either, same deal with Shinohara (though him coming back made me cry) it like, kind of undermines it if you’re going to have Juuzou derive his character development from that. Either Juuzou gets to keep his unhinged and his dad, or he loses his dad for real and he also grows up. God guys choose. What’s the message you’re playing here. (at least they kept Yoshimura dead, his death made me cry and I would have stabbed something if it wasn’t real, probably Ishida.) And even with Kaneki himself, god, if he can’t die from being stabbed straight through the fucking eye, what COULD kill him? It really diminishes the anxiety you feel about “omg is this person gonna die i want them to be ok” if they basically evade the laws of physics and their own previous character arcs 70 times. I’m definitely forgetting more of the same, Ishida can’t write a good death, he needed the anime writers to do it for him.

9. Kaneki. Just. Kaneki. 

God they fucking butchered this man. I could go on about his character is weird and confusing in the manga from the beginning, but we’re focusing on mostly all his weird :re character development, the bad handling of Haise and his memories, and all his iterations.

Before I read :re, what I could glean from fanart and the occasional fic that wasn’t tagged properly was really confusing and kind of a mixed bag. I knew Haise was Kaneki but without his memories, now in the ccg trying to be a pacifist and going :DDDDD a lot yknow. And what I came up with in my own mind for that change was a deal of (this makes more sense with the anime canon tbh, the manga honestly doesn’t do any of this well) like Kaneki after The Shit Went Down With Hide (whichever canon you’d like to interpret that as) he basically realized that he really couldn’t be a ghoul, he didn’t want to be, he didn’t want to hurt people and he wanted to be happy and make other people happy instead of what he thought was right before (trying to fight to protect others on his own etc) because that mentality had gotten people he loved hurt, and well subconsciously I guess that kind of factored into his development into Haise and maybe caused his memory loss (along with the, yknow, shanked eye.) So when I started to read it that kind of checked out, this is what he’s trying so hard to be now. But then this whole bullshit of the whole other like, 37 different versions of kaneki complicated things. 

Haise was scared that when he got his memories back he would cease to be, well, Haise, and he would just like revert back to what he was before everything. Which I can understand him being scared of and I think was a good point in the plot for him to worry about that, but I was like “oh honey don’t worry that’s not how it works” and was kind of vying for him to eventually get his memories back, come to terms with the fact that those were his memories, he did do those things, he was half a ghoul, and maybe come back to his original fight of wanting to bring the humans and ghouls together, still caring about his human people in the ccg and all. That development was real, and it wouldn’t just go away if he got his memories back, he learned a lot and grew a lot and he has a different outlook on life now. Right?

Fucking wrong I guess. Dude gets his memories back (very ambiguously, it was really hard to tell when that even happened tbh) and like. Turns into a flaming ass looking like ebony darkness dementia raven way. Haise gone. Fucking completely. No trace left. Doesn’t care about his kids anymore. When he’s done with that and goes white again he’s just Kaneki again and there’s really not enough left of things that like, really wouldn’t go away? He loses the flair? The dumbass? The :D? The Extra? WHY? Why would those things go away? Haise shouldn’t have been right that he would disappear when he got back his memories. That killed me. I love Kaneki and all but H a i s e. He is my b o y. H i m. With his e n e r g y  s h o r t s. And his m o m. And his c o o k i n g. And his k i d s, I l o v e him. And Ishida doesn’t seem to realize that they’re... literally the same person. Haise isn’t just some stupid bastard occupying Kaneki’s body, he’s a valid part of Kaneki himself and to be honest, peak Kaneki. Should have stayed that way. Would have been great for Hide tbh. Not just having him pretty much revert to his old self, but basically respond equally to both names and balance the world between human and ghoul. I would have loved that. What happened for real? It doesn’t make sense and it breaks my heart.

Some people on the interwebz try to kind of even that whole deal out by trying to say he like, has DID, which although is obviously a valid thing, like, so does not apply to him. God I’m like so not an expert on this but I feel like it’s not that hard to tell. His 87 little Kanekis in his head aren’t separate personas, they’re metaphorical representations of his past morals, experiences, and ideologies that all conflict. Again Haise here is peak conflict because when he gets his memories back, he has all these different conflicting ideas that were all previously separate. They’re all him. Tortured Kaneki constantly yelling at him in Jason’s chamber is basically again, a metaphor for how he’s denying his ghoulhood and the trauma that he’s been dealt. It’s not that this dude still exists just the way he is ready to show up at any moment lmao. Ishida kind of dealt with that badly too because Haise really said

after his memories happened so I can see why people might, but it’s... not right, and it’s Ishida’s fault about that which is Incorrect

Also just blanket statement, black reaper Kaneki? Fuck him and all he stands for. 0% valid. I can excuse literally every other version of him. But wh y. God he leaves the room and Urie starts misusing his power and getting groomed by a pedo, Saiko is just, left behind and sad, Mutsuki gets captured by a perv and mentally destroyed again, Shirazu dies and the bitch is like like “lol it’s your fault” yeah helpful, die

10. P- the- the porn chapter-

Idk about you but that was so fucking unecessary??? Not even going off of how terribly awkward and weird it was to have it there when the opening was “i’m sad about my best friend who’s gonna get executed what do you do when you’re sad about your best friend” “i simply do not think of him or i might actually just curl up and die” “yo lmao same” “wanna fuck” Like ok um I’m biased bc i’m not straight but I like, really hated that. Even just flipping through the pages as fast as I could to get to the end of it like. God. It’s not a fucking hentai. I’m here for the plot. If you’re not gonna release the director’s cut of kaneki fucking voring hide, i don’t think i need to see 20 pages of straight fucking sex. And if you absolutely must have porn, kaneki is a fucking bottom. That man gets pegged do not try to prove otherwise. You started it out that way god I love how they’re like “oh god wait that looks kind of gay, the woman being dominant, better stop that right now” god Ishida not having a single iota of knowlege about his own characters aND THEN SHE GETS PREGNANT? NO. Excuse me. No. I just. I. Why. This isn’t. A fucking porno. This isn’t tentacle porn i swear oh my god kill me

11. Giving the wrong characters attention

Basically, redeeming characters that should have been redeemed and not going into/discussing characters that should have been redeemed/had more backstory. For example, Tsukiyama can go fucking die. I like, do not even care rich boy. I don’t understand how anyone could think he needed to be redeemed he’s just a gay attention whore who really needs to let this kid get on with his merry fucking life. I don’t care. I literally did not need to read three whole books about his dumbass hangup over eating Kaneki. Kaneki doesn’t fucking want you bitch move on. He didn’t need to be redeemed or seen to be in any way sympathetic, no one wanted it. Same with that bitch ass Furuta, he wasn’t really redeemed but he was given w a y too much time to play out his sob story. God man Rize doesn’t fucking want you. These gross ass simps. I swear.

On the other hand, I kind of liked Eto even though she’s a pile of shit, and I got mad when they didn’t really go into much about her. And you know who could have gotten much more screen time/development? TOUKA. God, I love her and she was just sitting around in the background being straight. Let her have some spicy development. Also obviously, Hide. He was... so underappreciated and underexplained? What happened with him? He didn’t just pick himself off the ground in the sewers and go ‘well i’d better get back to the ccg now’ we have a whole two years which are completely unexplained, most of which he was off mysteriously being involved in things but completely missing the eye of Haise and other major players. Where tf was he? How did he get around? What was he even doing??? I wanna know about that! Not all the characters I hate’s tragic backstories that make me feel 0% more sympathetic towards them :)

12. ARE WE ALL JUST GONNA COLLECTIVELY IGNORE THE WHOLE VORE THING???

Ok like i know i say “the entire reason I read :re was __” but like to be honest this was the turning point, I saw pictures of hide’s vore face and went like

So I was like “god fucking damn it ok, Ishida would you care to explain this to me” *cracks open re*

And then they DIDN’T.

Like. It’s actually laughable how much that entire situation was just glossed over. They gave that maybe like two pages. Like what. I. This manga has more sex scene than no homoing that. They just don’t even bother to. I feel like Ishida had that as a plot point but realized halfway in how it looked (i.e., really fucking gay) and decided that was something that he was just gonna, not deal with. Just act like that’s a completely normal heterosexual bro thing to do. Like of course anywhere would be pretty gay but Kaneki chose his face. His face. Like his face and his wholeass neck and his shoulders and nowhere else. (and assumedly like, his tongue, seeing as how the dude can’t talk... bruh) Dude really said extreme hickey. French kiss to the max. Ishida clearly did realize that generally, you can only get a bitten off face by,,, having your face bitten off, which is just inherently really fucking gay. Like, I’m just at a loss as to how it even makes sense. You wouldn’t think that the skin off his face, and specifically around his mouth, would really be the most nutritious thing to consume? I can get like the shoulders but generally you’d think something like his arm or leg would be 1.less inconvenient, and 2.much more logical and nutritious? But NO, Kaneki was like “you know what i’m gonna do? eat your Face” and hide’s like “lmao sounds cool”

(not to mention, wasn’t there another guy with a vore face somewhere? like that old guy in the ccg with the bigass turtleneck, i wanna know about him) But like... my bro Ishida went “yeah this happened but i’m going to cover it up with speech bubbles and the ends of panels guys they clearly had their socks on” Dude didn’t even TRY to explain otherwise. Like hey man, that’s pretty damn gay, you are kind of at liberty to either tell me why otherwise, or accept those implications and acknowledge them?? It’s really hilarious when you ignore it cause it’s like

kind of

pretty damn

WEAK of you to leave it at that fucking pissbaby

hmmmmmmmmm however could this happen i guess we’ll never know

13. What the fuck was even the plot omg

God I’ve been writing this post for like five hours so like, I’ll keep it short but like it made sense in the original, not to be like an anime fan but the anime made fucking sense (not re i mean like the original) this lore is so fucking stupid god, the horrors of the entire fucking dragon arc bleach my eyes, unresolved plotlines who???? (the whole ‘oh yeah also ur dying of old age’ thing etc, is kaneki like??? still doing that?? or was that randomly resolved with the whole spewing ovary bullshit i’m going to fucking kill myself) and to top it off, good job Ishida at a real fucking cheap ending. 

You gave them. Fake human. Really? They just come up with artificial human at the end. Kind of undermines the entire fucking story my guy. Ah yes throw out our whole plot. That was the whole tragedy. You gotta eat human. The ghouls have to eat human and that’s tragic bc they have to kill people or whatever. Or i guess they fucking don’t well fucking ok. God you could have just had them negotiate a kind of peace where the ghouls can get dead humans and such, there are plenty of them and no one has to kill anyone then, there could be a rule system for it, it would be messy but eventually everyone would be ok with it, and I think that would work a lot better than “quick fix i made some hamburger helper human you can eat it fine” guys wtf. It’s like Ishida started plotting out the ending for re approximately 2 hours before his deadline. Anyway yes I hate re and I love yelling about it thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[gdkllr]

On Changing My Name to Levity (but you can call me Elliot too)

Well folks, after 8 years, your boy finally fulfilled his trans birthright and changed his name to something unique. LET ME ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS!

-“Can I still call you Elliot?” Yes. If this is most natural for you, please do. ❗ You DO NOT NEED to change how you refer to me if you do not wish to. ❗ My name is Levity Elliot Adler (surname). Over time, Elliot will simply become a name for those who have known me since college or youth. It's still a perfectly fine name for me.

-”Is this related to any changes in gender expression or identity?” No, just a name change.

- "Do nicknames work?" Yes, part of the reason I wanted this change was to gain a name that sounds better when said aloud and is more nickname-able. Lev and Levy (leh-vee) come to my mind. Feel free.

-”Why this name? Why now?” 

REASON 1: I didn’t choose the name Elliot for its personal relevance to me. Here’s what I chose: a name that began with a vowel, because my parents made that choice for each of their children, including me at birth. A name with 3 syllables, like my birth name. Something not too startlingly masculine. Something, then, that would signal my loyalty to my family and the nonthreatening nature of my transition. My desire to please and be loved. This is not something I’m dismissing. Just an observation of my values then.

REASON 2: I’ve been through a lot this decade. That’s why I won’t retire the name that got me through 2010’s. Elliot is core to me. Yet I no longer permit many of the people who loved me-as-Elliot to know me now, because many of them abused me. There are a handful of these people who I’m certain would say: “I loved/knew Elliot more than anyone.” This might be so. But I’ve gotten stronger, and so they fundamentally don’t know me at all anymore, because my victimhood was essential to their experience of me. I’m actually NOT saying that I was alienated from my name by the horrible way that shitty people said it. It’s just that I’m never going to let anybody do that to me again, so I like the new name as a reminder: “this time, treasure me. Make me something you can treasure”.

REASON 3: Why Levity, then? Firstly, my surname literally means “maker of __”; when paired with Levity, it comes to mean “maker of lightness and joy”. Secondly, appreciating my surname is important to me right now as someone who was recently accepted for his PhD studies (more on that to come later). I have struggled to know how to feel about becoming Dr. [surname] while wielding the awkward baggage of family trauma. But my grandpa was a first gen student and our family’s only PhD so far (not counting extended family or by marriage), so I want to be proud of his legacy. Due to its added meaning, being Levity makes me proud of my surname too.

Additionally, I like how Levity feels like a MMO deed title, earned through besting hardship; you knew Elliot, now get ready for Light Elliot. I like that it just adds something to the forefront of my existing name, rather than doing away with any of the "me" that's here already! 

I also made the name up myself (see below). I feel a sense of ownership over it that translates into how I hope to treat myself. Since I envisioned the name, it communicates far more about me off the bat than Elliot did (see reason 1). This guides me to be confident and open during this critical new phase of my life, and lets me avoid masking like I used to do constantly; it's a unique name that screams my values, I'm a unique person who hopes to scream my values louder going forward, that's all fantastic. 

Finally, child-me thought my best quality was that I was funny, so this name would make him proud, mirth being one part of levity.

REASON 4 must be addressed as an endnote because those who know me best will assume it's the reason for the name. It’s not, you hooligans- but I first envisioned Levity as the name for my comic characters’ far-future daughter. That comic is one of the most important things to me, so that's a plus for the name regardless.

If you don’t know of these characters, we should probably talk more! They’re all I talk about. (Alternately, “good for you; they’re all I talk about.”) They started out as DND characters I created in the hopes of being invited into my best friend’s friend group for the first time in my life. Through developing them, I gained inner strength and self-worth I didn’t know I could possess, and realized I deserved better. Perhaps you can notice the theme of my past few years. So no, I’m not named after my OCs’ gayby, but the connection is a bonus. I’m making a comic starring fictional Levity’s parents now, and it’s one of the most important things in my life; rediscovering creativity was necessary for me to become strong. I made them, but in so doing, they helped to make me too. So I steal their fictional daughter’s name. See? It works.

Thanks for reading! 💛

[polyputthekettleon]

How's the heterosexual part of my sexuality doing? And other transition/brain stuff.

One of the hardest parts about being married to someone I'm not fucking while also being the parent of a six-year-old while also living in a very small house is that the options are limited when it comes to masturbating.

When I wake up, I'm usually thinking of cock and boys. I always think of K first, even though K is now D and isn't a boy. Still, old habits die hard, and when she was living as K, ohhhh my god did fucking that boy when I woke up become a habit. The feel of rising into wakefulness with his body wrapped around me and the dependable warmth of his hard cock pressing up against me... While it didn't happen every single morning we spent together, more often than not he would wake too and the two of us would shift and wriggle around until he could slide his cock into my wet, hungry cunt... and oh god, the bliss.

To be snuggled and warm and full of the most glorious cock I have ever encountered in my life... god, what a way to wake up.

I miss it, but today I'm holding that grief at bay, trying to just enjoy the memories as they come, the feeling of absolute utter acceptance and love when he would moan and sigh to feel my cunt already wet, how good it felt for him to not bother with asking or foreplay (because he already had my blanket consent), and just start fucking me, sometimes right as I was waking. GOD I love waking up to sex.

And then the other morning when J rolled over and his hand rested on my butt as he slept, I thought about how good it would feel for him to keep going with his fingers and slide them inside my aching cunt, which then gave way to a memory/fantasy of the night when I slept between two men in Vegas because my friend was sleeping with the boy she'd been fucking and I wasn't going to leave her alone. One of the boys really did feel me up as we were drifting off, and I loved it but couldn't pursue more, because I was married and monogamous (okay, ish), but they were otherwise respectful of my stated (rather shakey) boundaries (this was an awfully long time ago). But in my fantasy, they both kept touching me, pulling my clothes back off and touching and teasing and fucking me. I wonder if that was the closest I ever came to being in an actual threesome with two men. (God, I hope not.)

So in answer to my title question, I'm honestly not sure. I'm giving myself permission to feel desire for cock, for someone who's a man, for the feel of stubble on my skin, for the gender dynamic I had with K and J as my lovers. I know I do desire it, and I know that one of the things that is making stuff easier right now is that D's sex drive has come back (for now anyway). She's felt interested in and willing, as well as been able to fuck me with her clit (her preferred word for her penis these days). It's been fucking wonderful, because I missed that part of our relationship so much. I am really enjoying getting to know her new body, which continues to change, and honestly there are so many things about relearning her and discovering what's changing that is just the best thing in the world. This weekend, I realized how soft her skin was feeling to my touch, and I was overwhelmed with joy and wonder, happiness for her because of how she's getting to become more like how she wants to be in the world, and how cool it is that 4mg of estrogen can do that. Mind absolutely blown. She also genuinely has some more fat in her breasts, and her nipples are so very, very sensitive, and it's just all so amazing.

She's also been sharing more with me about her plans for surgery, including her contemplation of SRS. If I'm honest, it's painful to listen to her talk about cutting on her body, but I'm working hard to remind myself that how she experiences and pursues a positive relationship with her body can be different from how I do it, and it be okay and not mean than she's rejecting me. That was a super helpful takeaway from my last therapy session; that my tendency is to interpret social difference as a form of rejection, which is not true. I suspect that that reframe, combined with the medicine, is helping this feel better. Additionally, I found some good YouTube videos of women talking about sex after their own surgeries, and I gained a ton of additional understanding from reading a shit ton more about vaginoplasty. Having the surgery and its results demystified, as well as hearing people talk about it still being good and fun, definitely helped me wrap my head around the possibility of D maybe one day choosing that. Plus, it's not like I haven't fantasized about fucking her while she has a cunt like mine... There are things I *love* doing with Y that I would fucking **love** to do with D, and can't. Plus seeing her feeling happy and affirmed in her gender is AMAZING, and really whatever helps that happen more often is what I want for her.

That said, I really really really really like her clit. As it is right now. And I would like for our parts to always be able to fit together, and I would really like for us to be like the trans and cis women in the amazing porn she and I watched together -- they were both gorgeously femme and beautiful and sexy, and one of them just had a cock the she used for penetration, and that didn't detract from her feminine-ness (at least for me) *at all*. To me, that feels like a more accessible strap on, plus one where both partners get pleasure at once. What's not to love??

Ultimately, I know she's the only person who will be able to decide what is right for her. I wish her parts felt 100% comfortable for her, and that she was as comfortable with our current genital combination as I am. I also wish that that surgery didn't sound like it would put a 6 month or longer haitus on sex. I also also wish I didn't feel mildly cut off from my feelings right now, and that has nothing to do with her transition except for that it is likely making it easier for me to not obsess and panic about her surgeries.

But to get back to my question... How's my heterosexual side doing? I think she's okay... I think she's numb, along with the rest of me. I did say I wanted a break, right? Here's my break. I'm trying to figure out how to feel about it.

[janamelie]

LGBT+ Characters

What This Isn’t

A claim of “proof” of the sexuality and / or gender identity of any of these characters.  We don’t need that or anything else to “justify” shipping.

What This Is

A reference post to collate instances in canon which could indicate LGBT+ characters.  In the case of regulars, I won’t include every instance as it would simply take too long.

Rimmer

As I was saying… :p

Honestly, Rimmer is so obviously LGBT+ to me that I don’t know where to start.  How about his reaction to Ace in “Dimension Jump”?

RIMMER: "Commander Rimmer!" I ask you.  "Ace!" Barf city.  I bet you anything he wears women's underwear.  They're all the same, this type, you know, Hurly-burly, rough-n-tumble macho marines in public, and behind closed doors he'll be parading up and down in taffeta ballgowns, drinking mint juleps, whipping the houseboy.

KRYTEN: Sir, he's you!  It's just that your lives diverged at a certain point in time.

RIMMER: Yes, I went into the gents and he went the other way.

KRYTEN: I assume, sir, you are making fatuous references to his sexuality.  If I may point out, if --

Or how about Low Rimmer?  Surely Rob and Doug could have got their point across a little less graphically?

Or if you prefer something less rapey, this passage from “IWCD”.  Unlike the show, Rob and Doug had more time and leeway to explore the characters and this is what they chose to include for Rimmer:

“Rimmer began to regret his outburst. He didn’t like to see his other self upset, and he even contemplated briefly going up to him and giving him a manly embrace. But in a brief moment of homosexual panic, he thought his double might get the wrong idea. Not that he would, of course, because he was him and he knew for a fact he wasn’t that way sexually tilted; so obviously his double wasn’t and obviously his double would know that he wasn’t either, and it was simply a manly embrace meant in a sort of mano a mano kind of way…Perhaps he was tired…Two or three days in bed and he’d be his old self again…Who cared if his copy saw it as a sign of weakness? He’d suggest it anyway.” Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers, Grant/Naylor, pg 233.

And this from the end of the “Better Than Life” novel, when Holly - whose IQ has been restored - comes up with a way to bring Lister back from the dead (no, not as a hologram):

“Rimmer stood in the hatchway and his face yielded to a grin, which in turn gave way to laughter.  Not his normal hollow braying empty laughter, this was an altogether different noise.  This was a noise his vocal cords had never been called on to make before.

It was the laughter of joy.”

Better Than Life, Grant/Naylor, pg 218.

I know some fans read Rimmer as asexual and you can certainly make an argument for that, most obviously in “Marooned” where he describes his younger self as not “particularly highly sexed”.  Of course, that wouldn’t preclude him also being homoromantic or biromantic.

Lister

No-one’s denying Lister’s obvious attraction to and affection for women, but that doesn’t mean that he can’t be bisexual or pansexual.  In fact, his “I’m not gay!” protestations in “Duct Soup” is a fairly common way for people attracted to more than one gender to describe themselves if they don’t feel comfortable using labels.  Given that he was talking to Chloe!Kochanski to whom he’s attracted, it makes sense that he’d prevaricate like this.

And then of course, in the very next episode “Blue”, he dreams about kissing Rimmer.  It’s not only the fact of this, it’s the subsequent scene drawing a direct comparison between him missing Rimmer and Kochanski missing her Dave - her boyfriend.  And despite the ending of this episode, when Lister actually meets Rimmer again, he’s delighted.  Until he realises it’s not HIS Rimmer and even so, he gets used to nano-Rimmer and they eventually become quite chummy.

Not forgetting the chemistry between him and Ace, of course.

Kryten

I know he's a mechanoid, but no-one has any problem reading his relationship with Mechanoid - and later Blob - Camille as romantic and Camille literally says herself that both she and her husband Hector are actually androgynous, which makes Kryten - at the very least - panromantic.

And that’s before we get to his very obvious love for Lister which he states himself in “Back In The Red”.

Holly

Holly was actually conceived as a female character and became male due to Norman Lovett’s original casting.  Sources: “Stasis Leaked” by Smegazine writer Jane Killick and “The Unofficial Red Dwarf Programme Guide” by Smegazine writers Chris Howarth and Steve Lyons.

With Hattie’s replacement casting and later Norman’s return, Rob and Doug may not have intended to create a trans or genderfluid character, but that’s what they ended up doing.

Holly is also bisexual - male Holly was attracted to Hilly and female Holly to Ace.

George McIntyre

It was actually Rob and Doug’s audio commentary on the pilot version of “The End” on “The Bodysnatcher Collection” which alerted me to this possibility.  I know it’s a stretch but I’m including it precisely because I’m indifferent to George as a character and it makes no difference to me whether someone believes this one or not.

During George’s speech at his “Welcome back” party, he says “I don’t want you to think of me as someone who’s dead, more as someone who’s no longer a threat to your marriages - I think Joe knows what I’m talking about!”

We see a man and a woman laughing and the woman playfully pokes the man in the arm.  He stops laughing and looks a bit sheepish.

Rob and Doug comment confusedly to the effect of “Shouldn’t it be the other way round?  This is one of the things we had no control over at this stage.”

Come on, Rob and Doug.  Not only does this scene appear intact in the final televised version of “The End”, you also included extra background on George in “Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers”, showing the events leading up to his death.  Unlike the hologram he replaces, Frank Saunders, there is no mention of George having a wife or indeed any partner, so as far I’m concerned, we shippers can read whatever we choose into this scene.  We would regardless, but the way canon leaves it is particularly open-ended.

Deb Lister and Arlene Rimmer (“Parallel Universe”)

See previous entries.  If their male counterparts are LGBT+ then so are they, plus I always got that vibe from the performances anyway.

Camille

Yes, everyone uses female pronouns for her as that’s how she presents to the crew, but she says herself: “We’re androgynous, but I suppose you could call [Hector] my husband.”

Noel Coward Waxdroid (“Meltdown”)

Mr Coward was gay in real life and his fictional incarnation here greets Rimmer with “Delighted to meet you, dear boy!”  I rest my case.

Nirvanah Crane

And arguably the entire crew of the Holoship according to her speech: “It's a ship regulation that we all have sexual congress at least twice a day.  It's a health rule … Here it is considered the height of bad manners to refuse an offer of sexual coupling … We are holograms.  There is no risk of disease or pregnancy.  That is why in our society we only believe in sex -- constant, guilt-free sex.”

Does that sound as though they’re fussy about the genders of their partners?  It certainly doesn’t to me.  So:

Captain Hercule Platini

Commander Randy Navarro

Commander Natalina Pushkin

Commander Binks

Sam Murray

From the Series V DVD booklet:

“Briefly revived in “Holoship”, it came as a surprise that Sam was male.  In the original pilot script - and Series 1′s deleted funeral scene - deceased crew member “Sam Murray” is said to be dating “Rick Thesen”.  Possibly Red Dwarf’s first gay couple?”

Cop (“Back To Reality”)

I’m sure it wasn’t written as such and maybe he didn’t intend to, but the way Lenny Von Dohlen plays his character’s reaction to the Voter Colonel just pings my gaydar.

Frank Todhunter (“The End”)

I know the conversation in “Duct Soup” (which also includes a reference to a gay crew member nicknamed “Bent Bob” *cringe*) where Kochanski tells Lister that the Todhunter in her dimension was gay is played off as something she made up to take Lister’s mind off his claustrophobia, but she never actually says as much.  There’s nothing to say that at least part of what she was saying wasn’t true.

Ackerman (Series VIII)

In the Series VIII DVD documentary, actor Graham McTavish says he was playing Ackerman as someone who enjoys sex with women “or at a pinch, men dressed as women”.  So onto this list he goes.

Big Meat (“Only The Good”)

I don’t blame you if you’ve blocked this one out as I find the scene almost unwatchable, but he’s the big prisoner who takes to the idea of being Cat’s “bitch” unexpectedly quickly.

Katerina Bartikovsky (“Back To Earth”)

Credit to @clueingforbeggs for noticing that in “Pete Part 1” Ackerman claims to have been “having jiggy-jiggy with the Science Officer’s wife” and connecting that with Katerina being a Science Officer.  There’s nothing to say that the Joy Squid didn’t conjure up the image of an actual crew member.

But maybe the ship has more than one Science Officer?  Well, the way it’s said makes it sound as though there is only one but in “Holoship” Kryten gives Rimmer a mind patch from two officers, one of whom is Science Officer Buchan.  There is no mention of Buchan’s gender so who’s to say they aren’t also female?

Begg Chief (“Entangled”)

“We prefer the ship of green.  And the sexy light man with the lady legs so long and luscious!”

Chancellor Wednesday (“The Beginning”)

Actor Alex Hardy says in Series X DVD doc “We’re Smegged” that he was playing the relationship between his character and Dominator Zlurth with a homoerotic undercurrent and you can see it subtly in his performance.

Dolphy (“Cured”)

All I’ll say about this one is that if Messalina had behaved towards Lister as Dolphy does in this episode, nobody would have doubted that she was into him.

Ziggy (“Timewave”)

Proof that LGBT+ characters in this show work a lot better when Doug isn’t intentionally writing them as such.  Sorry.

Feel free to add any examples I may have missed.

@lord-valery-mimes  @aziraphale-lesbian   @notalwaysweak  @feline-ranger  @downonthepharm-red-dwarf  @hologrammette  @rosecathy  @cazflibs​

[nctinfo]

[TRANS] NCT’s Taeil, Yuta and Mark Interview for ‘Arena Homme Plus’ July 2018 Issue!

Taeil

Still the happiest moment During interviews (in the past) when they asked me for my 'happiest moments in life' I would answer with 'passing the SM auditions' and 'debuting with NCT'. Even when I receive this question now, the answer stays the same. Actually, debuting with NCT was a greater feeling than just joy, a new word would have to be created to express that feeling, it was stronger than I could express. And also, we received a lot of rookies awards when we debuted. I couldn't really feel it at that time, but as time goes by, I'm starting to feel that joy. It's like (realizing) the gratefulness and preciousness of it. It's a real blessing to have met the NCT members. Well, sometimes we argue, but I think it is fate that we have met like this. haha Taeil's emotions Today during the shoot, mark kept playing BGM (background music) for me. Even during this interview right now, he's quietly listening to music. haha. I think the music and the lighting created the atmosphere for that day. I'm the type to always listen to music at home too. I feel the emotions that I want through music. In some ways, I feel more emotional, but I want to balance rationality and emotions by filling it with logical and realistic parts. Taeil's Charm I think I was not able to show a bright and energetic image of myself today during the shoot. I'm the type to be a bit camera-shy, but as you continue to look more into me, you will find me to be quite fun. I'm very positive and playful (but) I think I've not been able to show this side to people yet. Mark tells me 'once Taeil hyung joins, the atmosphere gets lifted immediately'. Rather than saying something that's funny, I think I'm the type of person to make an atmosphere where no one feels bored even when they're not doing anything.

Yuta

Yuta in Japan NCT 127’s Japanese debut album reached 1st place on Japan’s Billboard album sales chart. Because I am from Japan, I think it felt different for me. Firstly, I want to thank the Japanese fans who waited for us. When I first heard that we were going to debut in Japan I was so happy and I liked it so much because I thought it was going to be another opportunity for me to improve. Of course I felt that much responsibility. Since I have to do all the promotions in Japanese, it felt like I was in charge of the members. It was still fun though.

Recent Korean self-introduction In the past, there used to be many changes in the way I would introduce myself. But these days it's just simply 'Hello, I'm Yuta'. There are many nicknames which are created by the fans, so I choose between them. There are nicknames like 'Takoyaki Prince' and 'Killing Smile'. haha. Also recently, when the Touch music video was released they called me 'Yuta who is the main character in Touch'. I would like to be called what the fans want to call me. 

Yuta’s Driving Force It’s really hard up until you debut, but after debuting it’s really the start. So while promoting I always try to keep my “motivation”. Like exercising, and lately I’ve been studying English. It’s because I want to feel like I’m growing with every new challenge I take on. Although there is a big goal, right now it’s too hard to fulfill so I am trying to slowly fulfill small goals step by step. So that they can pile up and fulfill the big goal. Therefore I always need to be doing something to feel relaxed. That’s my driving force.

Mark

Mark's Cuteness The many people that watched <Dangerous Outside the Blanket> have been saying that I was cute and have a lot of aegyo. Thank you for kindly looking upon me. Actually, I'm the type to be quite shy at first. During awkward times I try to cover it up with laughter, and I think many people viewed it as positive when that they saw that image of me. Normally, I laugh a lot too, it's up to the point that I greet with 'Hello, I'm Mark who has a lot of laughter'. haha. There are times when I should hold my laughter so it has also become a concern for me but thank you nonetheless for liking my bright image. haha. 20 year old youth Mark I turned 20 this year. There's a rule that says minors can only work until 10pm in this industry. But now when we shoot past that time I'm suddenly reminded 'Ah, that's right, I'm 20 now'. When I was a high school student, I had to wake up early anyway to go to school even though I didn't have a schedule (for NCT). Now, when there's no schedule I can sleep in, during those times I kinda feel liberated. haha. But, whether it's then or now, my main focus has always been on NCT. I used to think 'When I turn 20, I should live differently' but now that I'm 20, I believe that growing up naturally is better than 'pretending to be a grown-up'. Mark's Challenge There are times when I feel scared to take on new challenges. However, I think of it as an opportunity to challenge myself when those chances come. I have to take those opportunities to learn and gain more experience. There are no promises but there are things that I wanted to challenges myself in. I've always thought about what it would be like to go street busking with the NCT hyungs. When watching programs like <Begin Again>, I've always had the drive to do (something like) that as well. It's on my bucket list. Even if I don't get the chance this year, it's something I want to accomplish someday.

Translation:  Esmee, Grace @ FY! NCT (NCTINFO) | Source: Arena Homme Plus Scans (1, 2, 3) — Please take out with full credits

[thedivinefish]

TGIWednesday and life lessons with Elton John

View this email online

TGIWednesday News

We saw Elton John this past Monday night in Tampa Florida on his farewell tour.  What a treat.  Honestly I grew up on his music as most of us did.  I think 100 years from now it will be playing in elevators!  He played for 3 hours.  You read that right!  He is arguably the most famous/singer/songwriter/composer of our time.    One of my favorite stories about him was how tough and distant his mom was (think mean ugh) and for an 11 year span he didn’t talk to her.  This is a man known the world over as a humanitarian  and honored by the Queen, now married with two kids.  Seemingly he has it all. Before his mom passed he had lunch with her and told her numerous times how he loved her and enjoyed their time together and she said, “Well you know I don’t approve of who you are and what all that you’ve become.” Most of us would want to dagger ourselves after sticking her first!  Sir Elton John said, “I know mom, that’s ok... I love you.”  

TGIWednesday Download

~ RELEASING JUDGEMENT ~ (Press play to watch and listen as I fish this for you) Today I will release myself from the judgement of others and my own self-judgement. I believe, think, know and feel that it is safe and comfortable just to be me. I am ready, willing and able to soldier on and accomplish what I was sent her to do. I know, when, where, how and why to make steady progress every day and so it is throughout all timelines and in all languages.   

Featured Audios for November

SPECIAL TRIPLE OFFER 

Get all 3 MyBeliefworks™ Audios/PDFs for the Holiday Stress Trifecta ONLY 3 for $99 Save nearly 50% off regular price when you buy all 3 together.

This time of year is the trifecta for dealing with family drama, holiday stress, and traveling hassles. 

This triple audio MP3 bundle gives you the help you will need at one time or another as you go through the next few months and things come up.  They are easy to download & play on your mobile device and can even be played in the background at the family gathering, airport, or shopping mall at low/no volume to change the energy for all.  

 Download all 3 for just $99 

1) Healing Family Relationships (reg. $57) This can help smooth out and release excess family hurts, feelings and upsets that have been years in the making and allow these events to wash away now.

2) Relieving Holiday Stress (reg. $57) This is about holidays, preparing for gatherings, family acceptance, shopping/spending stress etc. *FUN FACT: Play this audio on low or no volume on repeat in the background at your family gathering and see more joy come to all.

3) Traveling With Ease (reg. $57) Ugh, packing, running late, extra traffic, rude people, delays, turbulence and the TSA…. it’s all in this Audio and can clear the path to make any trip more Zen-like, peaceful and calm!

Includes over 90 mins of audio with more than 350 clearings  on 3 MP3s/3 PDFs and can be downloaded instantly! THIS SPECIAL 50% OFF DEAL ENDS NOVEMBER 30th

Get Special Offer Here

From the Fish Box

Q&A WITH JIMMY MACK Q) "I just purchased the Optimizing Success in Sales mp3.  I want to thank you for the work you're doing as it really speaks to me in its simplicity and completeness, if that makes sense. My question is, I don't actually feel any physical pulls or sways when doing the liquid fish or when I listen to the mp3s. When listening to the latest one I bought, I felt deep anxiety, got knots in my stomach, and goosebumps as you were speaking my fears of sales out loud, but I didn't feel anything that would indicate I was releasing them. Would you say this is indicative of the need to have a personal session? Or is there anything I can do to clear myself?  I do have a 15 min session booked with you but was wondering if there's more I could do until then." - H.H.  A) "Yes please know that it is working for you..... regardless of whether you're moving or not, we'll go over that when we have a live session when you will be hydrated and standing facing North which is optimal for feeling the pulls.  I would encourage you to subscribe to my YouTube and watch some of those videos too." - Jimmy

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

NOVEMBER 14th at 5pm EST - SOUL TALK  It's that time again!  I've been invited as a featured guest LIVE next Thursday November 14th at 5pm EST/ 2pm PST on the Soul Talk w/Patty Malek show. This time we'll be talking about and doing clearings for "Creating Divine Healing for Your Pets and Animals" EVERY TUESDAY at 9pm EST - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

UPCOMING GUESTS FOR NOVEMBER 

November 12th - Melissa Parks: Psychic intuitive and radio show host Love Light and Miracles, Iammelissaparks.com   November 19th - JoAnn Kisler: Masters Degree in Metaphysics and she believes that its  important for all of us to heal from those things that no longer serve us in our life’s journey. an Empath, Intuitive, Spiritual Life Coach, Sound Energy Healer, Breath Work, Workshop Facilitator, Meditation/ Yoga Teacher, and Yhandi Inner Child Healing.     www.breathofenergiahealing.com   November 26th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier our resident trans medium specializing in communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit Facebook page. 

** NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK ** https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions CALL (206) 806-9965

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show will have a BRAND NEW call in number & online listening link starting on November 5th.  We are moving from BlogTalkRadio to FreeConferenceCall.com. Shows will still be LIVE on Tuesday Nights at 9pm EDT w/replays  If you want to Listen in only, go to this website: https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions OR If you want to call in & ask a question CALL (206) 806-9965 No need to press #1, just dial in and you'll be in the queue. If the Call in Number above doesn’t seem to work, please use this back up Call in Number: 425.535.9149, when prompted, enter 206.806.9965 followed by #  International Callers, click the link below for the International call in list for your country.  If you're using the Free Conference Call App, it automatically re-routes the best call In number for you.  Please unblock your phone number if you wish to speak with Jimmy and or his guest host. Blocked, Restricted and Private Callers are not brought on air. Visit the TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full archived listing & all replays! 

Sessions at the Tampa Office 

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa area folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 38$ or 30 minutes 68$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  November 8th November 15th November 22nd

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students:  Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!    

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

NOVEMBER 6th "Today if you have been putting off getting that lump or bump or issue looked at, today is the day to do it. Be brave and make the call, the appointment and do what it takes to improve the quality and longevity of your life?"

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[divinefishingtips]

TGIWednesday and life lessons with Elton John

View this email online

TGIWednesday News

We saw Elton John this past Monday night in Tampa Florida on his farewell tour.  What a treat.  Honestly I grew up on his music as most of us did.  I think 100 years from now it will be playing in elevators!  He played for 3 hours.  You read that right!  He is arguably the most famous/singer/songwriter/composer of our time.    One of my favorite stories about him was how tough and distant his mom was (think mean ugh) and for an 11 year span he didn’t talk to her.  This is a man known the world over as a humanitarian  and honored by the Queen, now married with two kids.  Seemingly he has it all. Before his mom passed he had lunch with her and told her numerous times how he loved her and enjoyed their time together and she said, “Well you know I don’t approve of who you are and what all that you’ve become.” Most of us would want to dagger ourselves after sticking her first!  Sir Elton John said, “I know mom, that’s ok... I love you.”  

TGIWednesday Download

~ RELEASING JUDGEMENT ~ (Press play to watch and listen as I fish this for you) Today I will release myself from the judgement of others and my own self-judgement. I believe, think, know and feel that it is safe and comfortable just to be me. I am ready, willing and able to soldier on and accomplish what I was sent her to do. I know, when, where, how and why to make steady progress every day and so it is throughout all timelines and in all languages.   

Featured Audios for November

SPECIAL TRIPLE OFFER 

Get all 3 MyBeliefworks™ Audios/PDFs for the Holiday Stress Trifecta ONLY 3 for $99 Save nearly 50% off regular price when you buy all 3 together.

This time of year is the trifecta for dealing with family drama, holiday stress, and traveling hassles. 

This triple audio MP3 bundle gives you the help you will need at one time or another as you go through the next few months and things come up.  They are easy to download & play on your mobile device and can even be played in the background at the family gathering, airport, or shopping mall at low/no volume to change the energy for all.  

 Download all 3 for just $99 

1) Healing Family Relationships (reg. $57) This can help smooth out and release excess family hurts, feelings and upsets that have been years in the making and allow these events to wash away now.

2) Relieving Holiday Stress (reg. $57) This is about holidays, preparing for gatherings, family acceptance, shopping/spending stress etc. *FUN FACT: Play this audio on low or no volume on repeat in the background at your family gathering and see more joy come to all.

3) Traveling With Ease (reg. $57) Ugh, packing, running late, extra traffic, rude people, delays, turbulence and the TSA…. it’s all in this Audio and can clear the path to make any trip more Zen-like, peaceful and calm!

Includes over 90 mins of audio with more than 350 clearings  on 3 MP3s/3 PDFs and can be downloaded instantly! THIS SPECIAL 50% OFF DEAL ENDS NOVEMBER 30th

Get Special Offer Here

From the Fish Box

Q&A WITH JIMMY MACK Q) "I just purchased the Optimizing Success in Sales mp3.  I want to thank you for the work you're doing as it really speaks to me in its simplicity and completeness, if that makes sense. My question is, I don't actually feel any physical pulls or sways when doing the liquid fish or when I listen to the mp3s. When listening to the latest one I bought, I felt deep anxiety, got knots in my stomach, and goosebumps as you were speaking my fears of sales out loud, but I didn't feel anything that would indicate I was releasing them. Would you say this is indicative of the need to have a personal session? Or is there anything I can do to clear myself?  I do have a 15 min session booked with you but was wondering if there's more I could do until then." - H.H.  A) "Yes please know that it is working for you..... regardless of whether you're moving or not, we'll go over that when we have a live session when you will be hydrated and standing facing North which is optimal for feeling the pulls.  I would encourage you to subscribe to my YouTube and watch some of those videos too." - Jimmy

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

NOVEMBER 14th at 5pm EST - SOUL TALK  It's that time again!  I've been invited as a featured guest LIVE next Thursday November 14th at 5pm EST/ 2pm PST on the Soul Talk w/Patty Malek show. This time we'll be talking about and doing clearings for "Creating Divine Healing for Your Pets and Animals" EVERY TUESDAY at 9pm EST - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

UPCOMING GUESTS FOR NOVEMBER 

November 12th - Melissa Parks: Psychic intuitive and radio show host Love Light and Miracles, Iammelissaparks.com   November 19th - JoAnn Kisler: Masters Degree in Metaphysics and she believes that its  important for all of us to heal from those things that no longer serve us in our life’s journey. an Empath, Intuitive, Spiritual Life Coach, Sound Energy Healer, Breath Work, Workshop Facilitator, Meditation/ Yoga Teacher, and Yhandi Inner Child Healing.     www.breathofenergiahealing.com   November 26th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier our resident trans medium specializing in communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit Facebook page. 

** NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK ** https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions CALL (206) 806-9965

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show will have a BRAND NEW call in number & online listening link starting on November 5th.  We are moving from BlogTalkRadio to FreeConferenceCall.com. Shows will still be LIVE on Tuesday Nights at 9pm EDT w/replays  If you want to Listen in only, go to this website: https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions OR If you want to call in & ask a question CALL (206) 806-9965 No need to press #1, just dial in and you'll be in the queue. If the Call in Number above doesn’t seem to work, please use this back up Call in Number: 425.535.9149, when prompted, enter 206.806.9965 followed by #  International Callers, click the link below for the International call in list for your country.  If you're using the Free Conference Call App, it automatically re-routes the best call In number for you.  Please unblock your phone number if you wish to speak with Jimmy and or his guest host. Blocked, Restricted and Private Callers are not brought on air. Visit the TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full archived listing & all replays! 

Sessions at the Tampa Office 

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa area folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 38$ or 30 minutes 68$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  November 8th November 15th November 22nd

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students:  Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!    

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

NOVEMBER 6th "Today if you have been putting off getting that lump or bump or issue looked at, today is the day to do it. Be brave and make the call, the appointment and do what it takes to improve the quality and longevity of your life?"

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[365dailyaffirmations]

TGIWednesday and life lessons with Elton John

View this email online

TGIWednesday News

We saw Elton John this past Monday night in Tampa Florida on his farewell tour.  What a treat.  Honestly I grew up on his music as most of us did.  I think 100 years from now it will be playing in elevators!  He played for 3 hours.  You read that right!  He is arguably the most famous/singer/songwriter/composer of our time.    One of my favorite stories about him was how tough and distant his mom was (think mean ugh) and for an 11 year span he didn’t talk to her.  This is a man known the world over as a humanitarian  and honored by the Queen, now married with two kids.  Seemingly he has it all. Before his mom passed he had lunch with her and told her numerous times how he loved her and enjoyed their time together and she said, “Well you know I don’t approve of who you are and what all that you’ve become.” Most of us would want to dagger ourselves after sticking her first!  Sir Elton John said, “I know mom, that’s ok... I love you.”  

TGIWednesday Download

~ RELEASING JUDGEMENT ~ (Press play to watch and listen as I fish this for you) Today I will release myself from the judgement of others and my own self-judgement. I believe, think, know and feel that it is safe and comfortable just to be me. I am ready, willing and able to soldier on and accomplish what I was sent her to do. I know, when, where, how and why to make steady progress every day and so it is throughout all timelines and in all languages.   

Featured Audios for November

SPECIAL TRIPLE OFFER 

Get all 3 MyBeliefworks™ Audios/PDFs for the Holiday Stress Trifecta ONLY 3 for $99 Save nearly 50% off regular price when you buy all 3 together.

This time of year is the trifecta for dealing with family drama, holiday stress, and traveling hassles. 

This triple audio MP3 bundle gives you the help you will need at one time or another as you go through the next few months and things come up.  They are easy to download & play on your mobile device and can even be played in the background at the family gathering, airport, or shopping mall at low/no volume to change the energy for all.  

 Download all 3 for just $99 

1) Healing Family Relationships (reg. $57) This can help smooth out and release excess family hurts, feelings and upsets that have been years in the making and allow these events to wash away now.

2) Relieving Holiday Stress (reg. $57) This is about holidays, preparing for gatherings, family acceptance, shopping/spending stress etc. *FUN FACT: Play this audio on low or no volume on repeat in the background at your family gathering and see more joy come to all.

3) Traveling With Ease (reg. $57) Ugh, packing, running late, extra traffic, rude people, delays, turbulence and the TSA…. it’s all in this Audio and can clear the path to make any trip more Zen-like, peaceful and calm!

Includes over 90 mins of audio with more than 350 clearings  on 3 MP3s/3 PDFs and can be downloaded instantly! THIS SPECIAL 50% OFF DEAL ENDS NOVEMBER 30th

Get Special Offer Here

From the Fish Box

Q&A WITH JIMMY MACK Q) "I just purchased the Optimizing Success in Sales mp3.  I want to thank you for the work you're doing as it really speaks to me in its simplicity and completeness, if that makes sense. My question is, I don't actually feel any physical pulls or sways when doing the liquid fish or when I listen to the mp3s. When listening to the latest one I bought, I felt deep anxiety, got knots in my stomach, and goosebumps as you were speaking my fears of sales out loud, but I didn't feel anything that would indicate I was releasing them. Would you say this is indicative of the need to have a personal session? Or is there anything I can do to clear myself?  I do have a 15 min session booked with you but was wondering if there's more I could do until then." - H.H.  A) "Yes please know that it is working for you..... regardless of whether you're moving or not, we'll go over that when we have a live session when you will be hydrated and standing facing North which is optimal for feeling the pulls.  I would encourage you to subscribe to my YouTube and watch some of those videos too." - Jimmy

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

NOVEMBER 14th at 5pm EST - SOUL TALK  It's that time again!  I've been invited as a featured guest LIVE next Thursday November 14th at 5pm EST/ 2pm PST on the Soul Talk w/Patty Malek show. This time we'll be talking about and doing clearings for "Creating Divine Healing for Your Pets and Animals" EVERY TUESDAY at 9pm EST - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

UPCOMING GUESTS FOR NOVEMBER 

November 12th - Melissa Parks: Psychic intuitive and radio show host Love Light and Miracles, Iammelissaparks.com   November 19th - JoAnn Kisler: Masters Degree in Metaphysics and she believes that its  important for all of us to heal from those things that no longer serve us in our life’s journey. an Empath, Intuitive, Spiritual Life Coach, Sound Energy Healer, Breath Work, Workshop Facilitator, Meditation/ Yoga Teacher, and Yhandi Inner Child Healing.     www.breathofenergiahealing.com   November 26th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier our resident trans medium specializing in communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit Facebook page. 

** NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK ** https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions CALL (206) 806-9965

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show will have a BRAND NEW call in number & online listening link starting on November 5th.  We are moving from BlogTalkRadio to FreeConferenceCall.com. Shows will still be LIVE on Tuesday Nights at 9pm EDT w/replays  If you want to Listen in only, go to this website: https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions OR If you want to call in & ask a question CALL (206) 806-9965 No need to press #1, just dial in and you'll be in the queue. If the Call in Number above doesn’t seem to work, please use this back up Call in Number: 425.535.9149, when prompted, enter 206.806.9965 followed by #  International Callers, click the link below for the International call in list for your country.  If you're using the Free Conference Call App, it automatically re-routes the best call In number for you.  Please unblock your phone number if you wish to speak with Jimmy and or his guest host. Blocked, Restricted and Private Callers are not brought on air. Visit the TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full archived listing & all replays! 

Sessions at the Tampa Office 

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa area folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 38$ or 30 minutes 68$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  November 8th November 15th November 22nd

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students:  Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!    

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

NOVEMBER 6th "Today if you have been putting off getting that lump or bump or issue looked at, today is the day to do it. Be brave and make the call, the appointment and do what it takes to improve the quality and longevity of your life?"

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[advancedthetapractitioner]

TGIWednesday and life lessons with Elton John

TGIWednesday News

We saw Elton John this past Monday night in Tampa Florida on his farewell tour.  What a treat.  Honestly I grew up on his music as most of us did.  I think 100 years from now it will be playing in elevators!  He played for 3 hours.  You read that right!  He is arguably the most famous/singer/songwriter/composer of our time.    One of my favorite stories about him was how tough and distant his mom was (think mean ugh) and for an 11 year span he didn’t talk to her.  This is a man known the world over as a humanitarian  and honored by the Queen, now married with two kids.  Seemingly he has it all. Before his mom passed he had lunch with her and told her numerous times how he loved her and enjoyed their time together and she said, “Well you know I don’t approve of who you are and what all that you’ve become.” Most of us would want to dagger ourselves after sticking her first!  Sir Elton John said, “I know mom, that’s ok... I love you.”  

TGIWednesday Download

~ RELEASING JUDGEMENT ~ (Press play to watch and listen as I fish this for you) Today I will release myself from the judgement of others and my own self-judgement. I believe, think, know and feel that it is safe and comfortable just to be me. I am ready, willing and able to soldier on and accomplish what I was sent her to do. I know, when, where, how and why to make steady progress every day and so it is throughout all timelines and in all languages.   

Featured Audios for November

SPECIAL TRIPLE OFFER 

Get all 3 MyBeliefworks™ Audios/PDFs for the Holiday Stress Trifecta ONLY 3 for $99 Save nearly 50% off regular price when you buy all 3 together.

This time of year is the trifecta for dealing with family drama, holiday stress, and traveling hassles. 

This triple audio MP3 bundle gives you the help you will need at one time or another as you go through the next few months and things come up.  They are easy to download & play on your mobile device and can even be played in the background at the family gathering, airport, or shopping mall at low/no volume to change the energy for all.  

 Download all 3 for just $99 

1) Healing Family Relationships (reg. $57) This can help smooth out and release excess family hurts, feelings and upsets that have been years in the making and allow these events to wash away now.

2) Relieving Holiday Stress (reg. $57) This is about holidays, preparing for gatherings, family acceptance, shopping/spending stress etc. *FUN FACT: Play this audio on low or no volume on repeat in the background at your family gathering and see more joy come to all.

3) Traveling With Ease (reg. $57) Ugh, packing, running late, extra traffic, rude people, delays, turbulence and the TSA…. it’s all in this Audio and can clear the path to make any trip more Zen-like, peaceful and calm!

Includes over 90 mins of audio with more than 350 clearings  on 3 MP3s/3 PDFs and can be downloaded instantly! THIS SPECIAL 50% OFF DEAL ENDS NOVEMBER 30th

Get Special Offer Here

From the Fish Box

Q&A WITH JIMMY MACK Q) "I just purchased the Optimizing Success in Sales mp3.  I want to thank you for the work you're doing as it really speaks to me in its simplicity and completeness, if that makes sense. My question is, I don't actually feel any physical pulls or sways when doing the liquid fish or when I listen to the mp3s. When listening to the latest one I bought, I felt deep anxiety, got knots in my stomach, and goosebumps as you were speaking my fears of sales out loud, but I didn't feel anything that would indicate I was releasing them. Would you say this is indicative of the need to have a personal session? Or is there anything I can do to clear myself?  I do have a 15 min session booked with you but was wondering if there's more I could do until then." - H.H.  A) "Yes please know that it is working for you..... regardless of whether you're moving or not, we'll go over that when we have a live session when you will be hydrated and standing facing North which is optimal for feeling the pulls.  I would encourage you to subscribe to my YouTube and watch some of those videos too." - Jimmy

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

NOVEMBER 14th at 5pm EST - SOUL TALK  It's that time again!  I've been invited as a featured guest LIVE next Thursday November 14th at 5pm EST/ 2pm PST on the Soul Talk w/Patty Malek show. This time we'll be talking about and doing clearings for "Creating Divine Healing for Your Pets and Animals" EVERY TUESDAY at 9pm EST - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

UPCOMING GUESTS FOR NOVEMBER 

November 12th - Melissa Parks: Psychic intuitive and radio show host Love Light and Miracles, Iammelissaparks.com   November 19th - JoAnn Kisler: Masters Degree in Metaphysics and she believes that its  important for all of us to heal from those things that no longer serve us in our life’s journey. an Empath, Intuitive, Spiritual Life Coach, Sound Energy Healer, Breath Work, Workshop Facilitator, Meditation/ Yoga Teacher, and Yhandi Inner Child Healing.     www.breathofenergiahealing.com   November 26th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier our resident trans medium specializing in communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit Facebook page. 

** NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK ** https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions CALL (206) 806-9965

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show will have a BRAND NEW call in number & online listening link starting on November 5th.  We are moving from BlogTalkRadio to FreeConferenceCall.com. Shows will still be LIVE on Tuesday Nights at 9pm EDT w/replays  If you want to Listen in only, go to this website: https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions OR If you want to call in & ask a question CALL (206) 806-9965 No need to press #1, just dial in and you'll be in the queue. If the Call in Number above doesn’t seem to work, please use this back up Call in Number: 425.535.9149, when prompted, enter 206.806.9965 followed by #  International Callers, click the link below for the International call in list for your country.  If you're using the Free Conference Call App, it automatically re-routes the best call In number for you.  Please unblock your phone number if you wish to speak with Jimmy and or his guest host. Blocked, Restricted and Private Callers are not brought on air. Visit the TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full archived listing & all replays! 

Sessions at the Tampa Office 

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa area folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 38$ or 30 minutes 68$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  November 8th November 15th November 22nd

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students:  Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!    

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

NOVEMBER 6th "Today if you have been putting off getting that lump or bump or issue looked at, today is the day to do it. Be brave and make the call, the appointment and do what it takes to improve the quality and longevity of your life?"

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[just-kateblr]

I was tagged by @my-wanton-self

1. What’s your biggest pet peeve? Willful ignorance and people who are purposefully inconsiderate.  (They’re related, I suppose, but can manifest differently.)

2. What one fear would you like to conquer?  Currently, my biggest that I would like to conquer is openly presenting myself as female to the world. 

3. What’s your favourite song lyric and why? There are quite a few it’s hard to pick just one.  The one I’ll go with is from Sweet Jane from the Velvet Underground: Some people they like to go out dancin’/ and other people they have to work. Just watch me now/ and there's even some evil mothers/ Well there gonna tell you that everthing is just dirt/ you know that women never really faint/ and that villians always blink their eyes/ that children are the only ones who blush/and that life is just to die/ But anyone who ever had a heart/ they wouldn't turn around and break it/ and anyone who ever played a part / They wouldn't turn around and hate it.  Why do I like it?  I think it kind of speaks for itself.

4. If you could shop at one store for free, which would it be?  I would have to flip a coin between Nordstrom or Costco.

5. Which language would you like to speak fluently? Spanish.

6. What secret super power would you like to have, and why? Shapeshifting. You could get into just about anywhere.

7. Would you like to be famous and what would you like to be known for? I have no desire to be famous.

8. What was the worst haircut you ever had? A long time ago, I moved to Northern Virginia and needed a haircut.  I went to a barbershop that apparently specialized in military cuts and while I just asked for a trim, he got out clippers and after the first pass, I knew I was in trouble. I ended up with something pretty close to a high and tight.  It was awful. 

9. What are the most important qualities in friends? Honesty, intelligence, the willingness to share thoughts and opinions, good sense of humor, empathy, and a desire to make things better somehow.  I love having a common understanding and, at the same time, being able to challenge and be challenged.

10. What’s the most significant lesson you’ve learned in life so far?  People’s needs will not always match your own; it’s what they do at that point that is important.  Also, sometimes life is shitty, but it generally improves eventually.  Maybe not in the way you thought, but you’ll find that it’s no longer shitty.  (Yes, I know, that’s technically two. I’m lousy at following the rules.)

11. What makes you laugh the hardest? My daughters. They’re just plain funny.

12. What’s your proudest accomplishment? That’s a hard one because I tend not to look back too much. Plus, much of what I’ve accomplished has also been because other people have played along, so I can’t take full credit.

13. If you could have any view out the window of your room, which would it be?  The ocean. I grew up near the water and am now in the middle of the US.  I would love to be near a large body of water.  

14. If you could eat dinner with one celebrity, who would it be, and why? I can’t say that he’s a celebrity, but Barack Obama is certainly famous and would be an amazing dinner companion.  I’d probably want to have a ranging conversation about policy, his life, and experiences as President.  Plus, for bonus points, I’d try to get him to open up and vent about how he really feels about Trump.

15. If you could do something dangerous just once with no risk, what would you do?  I can’t think of much, I’ve already done a number of things that people consider dangerous.  I think removing the fear of danger would take away the adrenaline and most of the fun.

16. What’s your all-time favourite music video? Undercover of the Night by The Rolling Stones. It’s a great video; almost like a short film.

17. Which three words would you use to describe yourself? Smart, funny, empathetic.

18. What’s the first thing you’d do if you suddenly changed into the opposite sex? As a trans woman, I’m going to write my own rules here.  I am a woman, but if I suddenly had the body of a cis woman, I’d explore my tits and bits, then masturbate like there was no tomorrow. 

19. What’s your favourite website, and why?  I have eclectic tastes and moods, so it varies by the minute and the hour.  I love all of the information and places that I can go with the internet. 

20. If you got a tattoo, what would you get and where would you put it? I cannot think of one thing I would want on my skin forever.  If I had to choose, I might either get “Be Here Now” in a nice font on my wrist OR a butterfly on my shoulder for the symbolism. 

21. When you’re down, what do you do to feel better? I try not to wallow too long and look to do something to change the channel. That usually involves moving my body in some way or another.  I also reach out to dear friends for conversation and engagement.

22. If you could go on tour with a band for a month, who would it be, and why? Not my thing.

23. What’s you favourite dessert? I have a weakness for cannolis. Good ones, though.  The kind where the outside is freshly baked and then filled immediately before serving, so you have the mix of the crunch and the softness.  Divine! 

24. What one thing would you want to do most if you had all the money in the world? Ensure that money was not a barrier to anyone seeking further education.

25. Who’s the least obvious person you’d like to kiss? Least obvious? Maybe Sam Rockwell. There is something about him that I find strangely sexy. 

26. Would you join in at a topless beach? At this point, if I had a nice set of boobs, I would happily share them at a topless beach.

27. Where would you most like to travel?  I have too many choices to list here.  I would travel almost incessantly if I could.  I’ve not yet been to South America, Africa, or Antarctica, so those would be on the top of my list.  

28. What would you eat for your ultimate birthday dinner?  I tend to like food that is good and fresh.  I’d start with a fresh salad, with bleu cheese and bacon.  Grilled filet mignon. Very fresh corn on the cob.  Freshly baked bread with a nice crunchy crust.  Roasted brussel sprouts.  Good cannoli for dessert.

29. What was your most embarrassing moment? Eh, if you really want to know, hit me up in chat. It’s a bit of a story that involves Chinese food and getting sick in a work colleague’s hotel room.  It was mortifying when it happened, but it’s pretty darned funny.

30. What historical sporting event would you like to witness? In person, I’d love to the 1999 Men’s NCAA Basketball Championship.  My alma mater, the University of Connecticut, was the underdog and upset heavily favored Duke for their first national championship.  It was great to watch on TV, but it would be amazing to see in person. 

31. Which song evokes the strongest memories for you? Missing You - John Waite

32. What’s the best birthday celebration you can imagine? I don’t ever want a huge celebration, I’d love to have a bunch of close friends around where we can talk, drink, eat, laugh, and generally just enjoy everyone’s company.

33. What’s your favourite ethnic food? Mexican.

34. Do you have any habits you’d like to give up?  Procrastination.

35. What would you save first if your house caught on fire? Children, spouse, then pets.

36. Who would you trade places with for one month?  I’m not picky, and this might sound shallow, but I’d trade places with an able bodied cis woman who is considered above average in appearance. In other words, I’d love to see what it was like to live as an unequivocally gorgeous woman. 

37. What’s the story behind your first name? I had the joy of being able to select one for myself, which ended up being harder than I thought.  I like what I landed on, though.

38. What’s been the biggest obstacle in your life so far?  I don’t like the word obstacle.  I take it to mean a barrier that blocks things.  While I have had plenty of challenges, I try to not let those things block me.  My hope is to always move forward, even if it is slowly. No question, my biggest challenge is being trans. 

39. Have you ever stolen something? What was it? Why did you steal it? Ugh, yes.  I was traveling in Australia some years ago and I noticed a wallet sitting on some phone books at the post office. I looked inside and there was a couple hundred dollars in it.  I left it sitting there and went to make my call, but kept my eye on it.  Someone else from the hostel I was staying in walked in, saw the wallet, and then we locked eyes.  I indicated that I didn’t know whose it was and he reached in an pulled out the cash.  I figured, if it was going to be stolen, I was going to benefit from it (I was low on cash at the time).  We walked around the corner, he split the money with me and we went our separate ways.  I still regret doing this and wish that I had picked up the wallet when I first saw it and turned it in.

40. To you, what’s the secret to happiness? I believe happiness is really just enjoying life’s simple and pleasurable moments.  We’ve got so much that goes on that has peaks and valleys of emotion and it is important to feel those, for the good and the bad.  It is the small moments that are the glue to our lives, though.  A laugh with a friend.  Warm sunshine on your skin on a cool day.  The smell of salt air.  To me, it’s enjoying those moments that are what make for happiness and joy.

Please do not feel compelled to do this, but I’m going to tag a few people whom I would love to see their responses.  I tag @mymindisdrawinga, @annacaffeina, @perfectlyscrumptious, @perfectlywhelmed, @visionaria, @tumbleweedsinmyvagina, @ptero-bites, @misslondoncallin, @vampysquid, and I started thinking this list was getting long, so I stopped, but please feel free to respond away if you are taken with the idea.

[thefoodwiththedood]

Hey look, some new OCs with an actual theme and purpose for existing! I mentioned in Hes and Cerate’s backstory posts that they fight alongside the “Devaron’s Angels”—a rebel cell dedicated to fighting the Imperial presence on Devaron, while also vying for social and governmental reform. Well, here’s just a taste of what that rebel cell is comprised of: from left to right, meet Gemre G’vund, Russoc Dhaalgondt, 0R-D3, and Vononnue D’ruexieq! Together with Hes and Cer, they pilot Hes’s ship: the heavily-modified Freefall-class bomber, the “Lady Lucy” (pictured above, colors by me and lineart by @empress-only-in-name). I really love how these guys turned out, so yeah, lemme know what you guys think! :D

Just as with all my OCs, the backstories of the new four are below:

Russoc (Russ, for short) was the first to meet Hes, and he was one of the few people to see her before she became a leader. When Hes was still living on the streets of Montellian Serat, Russ—a retired soldier turned farmer—would take pity on her, always saving a few bits of food for her when he’d go to town to sell his harvest. However, as much as Russ loved his simple farm life with his husband and daughters, his little vegetable stand was never enough to pay the new, heavy taxes levied by the rising Empire. He tried his bet to pay his debts but, one day, the Empire grew tired of waiting. As the story goes, late one night Russ came home from Montellian Serat to find his home and fields in flames.  He thought it to be a freak accident at first, but then he saw the stormtroopers brandishing flamethrowers outside. This, coupled with the realization that his family would have been asleep inside, sent him into a blind rage. He immediately rushed the troopers, managing to pierce his horns through one’s stomach and fight the others off with the trooper’s limp body still hanging from his head. He managed to kill four more troopers with his bare hands before the rest brought him to his knees, stunning him multiple times and sawing off his horns to prevent any further gorings. Bloodied and beaten, Russ was taken back to prison in Montellian Serat to await his proper execution, but before it could be done, an angel swooped in and saved him. That is to say, the newly-formed Devaron’s Angels raided his prison in order to rescue allies of theirs, and among all the chaos, the recently recruited Hes Chaddic noticed Russ: the kind soul who had helped her to stay alive all those years ago. She decided to return the favor; she freed him of his restraints and helped him to his feet before offering him her spare blaster. Russ didn’t take it right away, but as he thought of his position, he realized he really had nothing left to lose, and right then and there he joined the Devaron’s Angels. Since then, Russ has been one of Hes’s best friends and a great asset to the Angels—not only is he a strong and experienced soldier, but he’s pretty much the only one of the Angels who can kill a stormtrooper face-to-face and feel no remorse at all. This led Hes to choose him for the “Lady Lucy”’s crew when she rose to power amongst the Angels, electing to have him in the rear gunners position, just so he could kill all the troopers his heart desired.

Vononnue (or Vonnie, for short) was the next Angel Hes recruited. As the daughter of a starfighter mechanic operating out of the city of Plaeree, Vonnie grew up around and had a natural talent with ships, and she often entered illegal podraces with the hope of winning cash rewards just to put food on the table for her and her father. She often did win, too, yet when the Empire started cracking down on anti-gambling and anti-podracing laws, the money all but stopped coming in. Soon after, the D’ruexieq’s repair business went bust, and Vonnie and her father began to starve just so they could keep a roof over their heads. It was when Vonnie’s father began to fall ill that she realized something had to be done. She began stealing food and medicine from Imperial strongholds around Plaeree, always managing to evade the authorities with the help of her old racing pod, the “Happabore”, which was both strong and fast enough to push past an Imperial troop transport without so much as a scratch. On one such job, Vonnie and the Devaron’s Angels happened to be hitting up the same base, and after they both made their escape, Hes commended Vonnie for her skills as a pilot, and offered her a position with the Angels. Vonnie explained that she really only stole enough for her and her father, but when Hes promised to share the Angels’ stash of medical supplies and food, she gladly accepted the offer. Nowadays, Vonnie’s father serves as a mechanic for the Angel’s fleet of ships, and Vonnie herself serves as the “Lady Lucy”‘s pilot—Hes was never too good at dogfighting, so she was happy to take a backseat to her more experienced and talented ally.

While the previous two had families they loved before the Devaron’s Angels, Gemre was not so lucky. Born to a family of politicians in Montellian Serat, Gemre—previously named Ghurussa, before he came out as trans—was expected to maintain the proper, distinguished visage common among the higher-class females on Devaron. Despite his parents’ best efforts, however, Gemre refused to fall in line with that way of life, often sneaking off to hang out with the far more scrappy and fun-loving boys a few neighborhoods away. All the while, tensions between him and his parents grew, and they finally came to a head when he came out as trans, and asked that he be called Gemre from then on. His parents, the fundamentalists that they were, saw his transition as not just as an unnatural perversion of his gender, but of his social standing—”how dare you lower yourself to the men’s level”, they said. After a fierce shouting match, Gemre, only fifteen years old at the time, walked out of his family’s home, never to return. Soon after, during a raid of an Imperial base in Montellian Serat, Hes found Gemre living on the streets, much as she’d done when she was his age. While the rest of the Angels fought for the base, Hes sat beside Gemre and offered him her spare ration pack, and he told her his story. As she spoke, her feelings toward him went from pity to empathy, and she shared her own story. The two spend the evening laughing together, while explosions and gunfire erupted from the Imperial base not far off. When the raid was done, Hes helped Gemre to his feet and offered him a position among the Angels’ ranks. With the promise of not only food and shelter but a new family that accepted him for who he was, he gladly accepted the offer. From then on, Gemre served as the mechanic on the “Lady Lucy”—something it certainly needed, since the thing needed constant in-flight maintenance just to make sure it didn’t explode on its own. What’s more, since she believes a soldier’s at his best when he’s comfortable in his own skin, Hes dedicates a small portion of her share of the Angels’ “earnings” to fund Gemre’s transition, and now, with her help, his horns are finally growing in, and he’s finally starting to feel happy again.

Sappy backstories are great and all, but honestly, 0R-D3 just exists for shits and giggles. His conception occurred one night when Hes got bored and decided she wanted a droid, and for the next week she, Gemre, and Cerate all worked together to build one. The only problem was none of them had any business building a droid; Hes had no knowledge of mechanics whatsoever, Gemre was really only experienced with ships, and Cerate’s only knowledge of programming came from old, tattered and stolen books. When all was said and done, 0R-D3 (or Oh-Ar, for short) contained parts from an imperial sentry droid, a B2 battle droid, a couple astromechs, some protocol droids, a magna-guard, plus some other odds-and-ends from ships and a speeder engine powering him. His code was simple, his construction was wonky, but somehow, he sprang to life. He began to speak in broken, garbled binary, and immediately Cer and Gemre began having second thoughts about their “creation”. Hes, however, was overjoyed—immediately, she threw her arms around the new droid, declaring he was her new boyfriend. Soon after, in realizing that heavy lifting was all he was really good for, Hes employed Orde as the bombardier on the “Lady Lucy”, and to this day he remains a beloved staple of the Devaron’s Angels and Hes’s pride and joy. In a way, they see him as a symbol of their rebellion—badly designed and badly constructed, yet somehow, he works.

OKAY, so those all went on longer than I thought, but hey, lemme know what you think of these guys! :D