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janeyseymour · 9 months ago

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Dancing On My Own (Tiesto Remix)- pt 2

After some pushback from the first, I knew I had to write a second part, and quick. this should placate most of you.

Summary: the aftermath.

Part 1.

WC: 2.25k

tags: @lakita-fisher @weeeeeeeeee3 @lilsmeaux @@morgana-larkin

You somehow make it home unscathed- you could barely see as you drove through your tears, your breakup playlist on full blast. You guess you’re officially done. With Melissa already having a new woman, you wonder just how much you ever even meant to her.

As soon as you’re pulling into your spot, the waterworks hit in full- as if they weren’t already. You rip off the jersey and hat that you wore out, not caring where they land as you throw them into your front room. You had bought a bottle of wine to share with the redhead that you fell madly in love with to celebrate getting back together, and hopefully a big win, but now that seems wrong to drink on your own. You reach for the vodka instead.

You don’t show to school the next day, calling out claiming that you’re sick. And you are. Your heart hurts more than you ever thought possible, and your hangover is killer. You spend the morning laying in bed, eyes rimmed red. The redness won’t be going away any time soon.

Melissa saunters into the school, happy that she hasn’t seen your car in the parking lot, and doing a little dance because her team won. She’s also quite happy that she was able to rebound with last night- even if she didn’t particularly enjoy the woman that she spent her time with. She much rather would’ve spent time with you, but… you were… are a Cowboys fan.

“Someone’s happy,” Barbara chuckles. She thinks she knows why. “Did you have a good night at the game?”

“I did!” Melissa grins. “I took this girl I met at the bar, and-”

The kindergarten teacher’s face drops. “What?”

“I wasn’t going to let the ticket I had for Y/N go to waste,” the redhead shrugs. “So I asked Lena if she wanted to go with me to heckle the Cowgirls fans.”

“Oh no,” Barbara whispers. “Oh, no. no. no.”

“What? I figured after Y/N and I, I should get myself back out there.”

“No,” Barbara states again with fire. “Oh good god.”

“What?! What, Barb?”

“I- I have to go make a call,” the kindergarten teacher grabs her coffee mug and heads out quickly. She closes her classroom door as she dials your number.

Your phone starts ringing far too loudly, and you groan. You glance at it and see Barbara’s contact picture light up.

“Hello?” you groan into the phone, just barely sitting up. Your voice is rough, both from the tears and the fact that you haven’t spoken since last night.

“Sweetheart,” your coworker whispers to you. “Where are you? Are you okay?”

“Home,” you grumble. “Sick.”

The kindergarten teacher frowns. “Sick? Lovesick?”

“Heartbroken,” you whisper, voice cracking slightly. “She was there with someone else. You knew, didn’t you?”

“Y/N, dear,” Barb sighs quietly. “If I had known that she was talking to someone else, I never would’ve told you to go for it. In fact, when she came in dancing today I thought it was because the two of you got back together.”

“Nope,” you pop the ‘p’. “She had her tongue down someone else’s throat.”

“Honey, I am so sorry,” the woman tells you softly.

“I’m not mad at you,” you tell her genuinely. “You didn’t do anything wrong but try to help me.”

“Can I do anything else for you?” Barbara asks.

You sigh. “Just… when I come back to work tomorrow, pretend I was sick? I don’t feel like having Janine jump down my throat.”

“I can do that,” the kindergarten teacher says softly. “And please know that even though the two of you aren’t involved anymore, we are all still on your side. You’re still a part of our-”

“It’s okay,” you sigh sadly. “I know that you’re all Melissa’s friends, and I don’t want to put any of you in an awkward position having to pick sides. She’s been here longer; it’s all hers.”

“Sweetheart,” Barbara breathes.

“It’s okay. I’ll be okay, Barb. Thank you for trying to help me,” you mumble before hanging up.

By the time you hang up with her, the students will begin trickling in, so Barbara doesn’t have time to go speak with Melissa about the situation at hand.

But at lunch, Barbara simply grabs her lunch and picks up the redhead’s that is already out on the table.

“Barb,” Melissa gasps.

“My room. Now,” is all the kindergarten teacher has to say to get her friend to follow her out of the staff room and down the hall, head hung like a child being escorted to the principal’s office.

When they get there, Barbara sets down their lunches at her desk and pulls a chair up for Melissa.

“Barb, c’mon,” your… ex-girlfriend groans. “What gives?”

“What the hell were you doing out with another woman?”

The second grade teacher immediately gets defensive. “Y/N and I-”

“Y/N went to the game last night… dressed in Eagles gear and ready to cheer for your team because she loves you,” the older teacher says sternly. “And you threw it in her face that you were done with her and already moved on.”

“She- what?”

“She spent close to a thousand dollars on sports gear last week to try to win you back. She wore Phillies gear, she wore Flyers apparel, she wore a Sixers sweatshirt, she even wore a jersey from the Union, and on Friday, she wore Kelly green to show you that she’s in Philly now.”

“Didn’t show up in a Hurts or Kelce jersey though,” Melissa rolls her eyes.

“Because she was saving that for last night when she was going to win you back with the ticket that she managed to get next to you!”

Melissa’s face drops. “She- fuck.”

“She’s not sick. She’s heartbroken right now.”

The redhead bites her lip. “I fucked up takin’ Lena, didn’t I?”

Barbara nods. “She was crying when I called, and she told me she was heartbroken to see you with some other girl’s tongue down your throat.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah,” the kindergarten teacher nods. “That word.”

Melissa breathes out heavily. “Do you…” she shakes her head. “She’s still a Cowboys fan.”

“Melissa Ann, you love her. She loves you. She’s perfect aside from that one fact, and when she tried explaining herself to you at school, you wouldn’t let her get a word out. Hear her out, and even then… if she does love the Cowboys, are you really going to let something as trivial as a sports team rivalry come between you and the one person that you love?”

“I…” the redhead bites her lip. “Do you think I have a chance at winning her back?”

At that, the kindergarten teacher shrugs. “You’ll never know if you don’t try… although, I would end things with this new woman you were making out with last night.”

The end of the day could not come sooner for the second grade teacher. She’s debated texting you or calling you, but she feels this is something that she has to do in person.

So as soon as she’s finished for the day, she runs out. She leaves her lunch bag in the staff room, doesn’t wait for her work wife; she just books it. She’s tearing out of the school parking lot in the direction of your apartment complex.

The entire drive over, she’s preparing what she’s going to say to you, but once she’s standing on the door mat that you have sitting outside your front door, it all leaves her brain. She knocks a few times before stepping back.

Who the hell is at your door? Could it be Barbara checking on you? Or maybe she said something to Janine or Jacob, and they’re here to make sure that you’re okay? With a groan, you sit up and stand from the couch. You’ve been sitting there for so long wallowing in your self pity that you leave an indent in the cushions. You check the peephole, and… why is Melissa standing at your door?

You open the door, not caring how you look right now.

The sight of you hurts her heart. Your hair is messily tied up, you haven’t changed out of your pajamas, your eyes are still rimmed red… you just look so heartbroken right now.

“What? Come to yell at me some more?” you try sound angry, but it just comes out pathetic.

“No,” she says softly. “Hun, I’m-”

“Here to break up with me?” you sigh. “You made it pretty clear we were done.”

“Can I come in?” she asks quietly. The woman sounds so unlike herself.

You shrug and leave the door open as you walk away. She follows you in. “I’m here to say I’m sorry.”

“It’s whatever,” you sigh as you curl back into your mountain of blankets. “I’ll be fine. I’ll be civil the rest of the school year, I’ll leave you and your friends alone, and then I’ll find another school in the area to work at.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Well, it’s a little hard to work with your ex-girlfriend,” you sigh. “Now, if you wouldn’t mind seeing yourself out.”

“Y/N,” Melissa says so softly, and she has her eyes trained on you. They’re filled with sadness. “I don’t want to break up.”

“I thought we already did,” you spit out. “And if we didn’t, I know you had your tongue down another woman’s throat last night anyway, so if you don’t break up with me, I’ll do it for you. Then you can make me the bad guy when you-”

“Barb told me what you were trying to do,” the redhead admits softly.

“If you would’ve just listened to me, you would know that I didn’t necessarily have a choice in who I rooted for when it came to football. My father, who is my idol and best friend so don’t you dare say a single bad thing about him, loves the Cowboys. He insisted on buying me the Prescott jersey despite the fact that I didn’t want him spending that money on me to begin with.”

“I should’ve known with you growing up near Dallas,” she sighs.

“But I’m here now,” you continue. “And once I talked to him and he told me that if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. So I did. I bought all of this Philly stuff, bought a ticket to the game and showed up in a hat and Hurts jersey, only to see you with someone else. So… it’ doesn’t matter.”

“Hun, I never wanted her.”

“Well, you got her.”

“The whole time, I was wishing it was you.”

You rub your temples.

“Barb told me she helped you,” the second grade teacher admits. “If I had known… I would’ve been-”

“Any time they brought me up, you shut them down,” you fire out. “You wouldn’t let me speak to you at all.”

“You avoided me too!”

“I was trying to give you space, and when I did try to talk to you, you shut me down and told me you weren’t going to date a Cowgirl.”

“How can I fix this?” Melissa asks as she comes to sit down next to you. “I’ll do- I’ll do anything.”

“I thought you weren’t going to date a Cowgirl,” you taunt her. “And you have your new girl now.”

“She isn’t my girl,” the redhead tells you sternly. “You’re my girl. She’s some random girl I picked up at a bar while I was trying to distract myself from missing you. The whole time I was with her, I wished it was you- I didn’t even sleep with her. She was throwing herself at me, but I couldn’t.”

“So what are you saying?”

“And then today when you didn’t show up to school, Barbara told me what you did and how she helped you… she talked some sense into me; asked me if I was really going to let a stupid sports rivalry get in the way of loving the one person I truly adore. The answer is no. I was… an idiot. An absolute idiot.”

“Yeah,” you snort. “You were.”

“So… I’m here, begging you to take me back. Please, Y/N,” Melissa tears up. “Please. Please don’t walk away.”

“Melissa, you hurt me more than you know,” you whisper.

“And I will spend the rest of my days making it up to you,” she promises you. “Please.”

You take a deep breath for huffing it out. Secretly, you were hoping she would come back to you. And the opportunity is right here in front of you. “It’s… it’s going to take a bit for me to fully forgive you.”

“And I understand that entirely. I was a real jackass. I’ll make it up to you however I can.” She pulls you into her arms and kisses your temple gently. “However I can.”

That ‘however’ is by having her take you to another Eagles game- with the entire Abbott crew. You wear your Hurts jersey, hanging off of her the entire night, and you cheer for your new team.

The other ‘however’ is by getting her to take you to a Phillies RedOctober game at Lincoln Financial field. When they play their celebratory song after clinching a spot in the World Series as NLC champions, you know that you’re no longer dancing on your own (tiesto remix). You have Melissa by your side.

#melissa schemmenti fanfiction #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti #abbott elementary fanfiction #abbott elementary fanfic #abbott elementary

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mustainegf · 3 months ago

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Can yoh do a dave fluff where dave has wronged you some way and both of yall are like teens. He's in grade 12 and your in grade 11 so like 17 and 16. And dave never comes to prom but when u were there you spot him outta the corny of your eye and he's sad/crying holding a bouquet of flowers hoping for forgiveness.and when u go up to him and forgiv you just dance and hold eachother. While he's just all "I missed you I'm sorry" ect

THIS IS SO CUTE I love dave so much so I spent a lot of time on this one

Wrote this listening to nutshell—Alice in chains cuz it felt fitting

𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊 ¹⁹⁷⁸

The end of the school year was always this sort of meld of excitement for the summer break, nostalgia for the last few months, and a bit of sadness knowing that it was all ending. This year though, it was different. With the upcoming prom looming in the Future, the thought of saying goodbye to friends… particularly Dave, because he would be graduating had me feeling very off balance. This should have been a time for celebration, but somehow the wave length between us had shifted, and I wasn't exactly sure how to fix it.

Dave and I had been inseparable since middle school. The best friend who was always there to make me laugh, to understand my weird sense of humor, and who knew all my secrets. We were different in lots of ways, he was so loud and confident, the guy everybody wanted to know, and I was quieter, more comfortable in the shadows, but with him, I always felt seen.

But lately, something had changed. I wasn't even sure when it began. Perhaps it was back during one of those late night hangouts that got more complicated every year, or maybe it was just the way life makes its own way as you grow up. Whatever it was, it had forged a gulf between us.

The last time we spoke, really spoke, was weeks ago. I had asked him about prom, half teasingly asking him who he would ask. He just shrugged off, saying he wasn't going.

I hadn't been surprised at that, prom didn't seem like his scene. What had surprised me was the way he'd brushed me off, like he couldn't even really be bothered to talk about it. And when I kept pushing, trying to get him to open up, he snapped. He told me to back off, that I should stop acting like I knew what was good for him.

His words stung more than I really wanted to admit. I snapped back, telling him that maybe I didn't know what was best for him, but at least I cared.

That was the last time we spoke. Since then, he'd been avoiding me, and I was too stubborn, maybe too hurt, to reach out.

So, prom night came, still not a sound from him. Perhaps foolishly, I had held onto the hope that he'd at least call or toss a rock at my bedroom window late at night like he always did. But it was all nothing.

I wasn't completely convinced that I even wanted to go to prom after the whole thing with Dave, but my friends were really pressuring me. They bugged me about it, saying I should go, to stop moping around, that it was going to be fun. So, I let them drag me along, dressed in the pale blue gown my mom had insisted on buying, with my hair done up in curls that felt too formal, too unlike me.

The gym looked unrecognizable, twinkling lights falling from the ceiling in threads, a dance floor made hastily, shimmering tables draped in white cloths, roses and candles bunched together in the middle of each one.

Everybody looked great, having dressed up and wearing a wonderfully exciting glow on their faces. However, it just didn’t feel complete, no matter how much laughter and music filled the air.

Deep down I longed for his familiar sleep of leather and cigarettes, that hint of coffee. To see his fiery curls bounce as he laughed at something immature.

I danced for the first hour, trying to have some fun. My friends dragged me onto the dance floor, I wore a smile, although it wasn’t really from my heart. I'd keep looking around, scanning the room, although I knew very well that Dave wouldn't show up. He had said so himself, and I had taken him at his word. Still, I couldn't help looking, hoping.

The night was slipping away, so I began the fight to slip away for some air. I managed to fight my way free to the edge of the room, the shadows deeper, the music less loud. That was when I saw him.

Dave was by the door, almost merged with the shadows, awkwardly clutching a bouquet of flowers. He stood there, completely out of place in his handsome black suit, with nearly lost eyes, looking soft now when his usual attitude of rebellion was replaced.

His hair was a bit disheveled, as though he had run his hands through it in a state of nervousness, and his eyes… his hazel eyes were reddened, like he had been crying.

I stared for a moment, hesitation in my mind about whether or not this was him. Then our eyes met, and his sadness almost took my breath like a blow in the chest. He was here. He really was here, and he looked so broken.

I approached him step by step, without thinking further. Each step seemed like a year, and his eyes never left mine.

Up close, I could see the stress in his jaw and the way his hands were shaking with the flowers. His mouth opened and closed repeatedly, like he wanted to say something but couldn't really find any words.

Finally, he whispered, "I'm sorry.”

Two words, only two, yet they carried the weight of all that had preceded them. I wanted to cry, but I blinked away the hot sting.

"Dave…" My voice broke, and it took a swallow before I could continue. "What are you doing here?"

His shoulders slumped as the weight of the world finally came to rest upon them. "I told myself I wouldn't but… I had to see you."

I looked down at a bouquet in his hands. A messy mixture of flowers, which didn't really agree with each other but somehow made sense in his palm. They were beautiful in one way, wild and untamed, just like him.

"Are these for me?" I asked, trying to keep my voice still and vigilant.

Nodding, he gazed down at the floor. "I was gonna take 'em to your place. I know it sounds stupid, but… I guess I was hopin' you might forgive me. For being a dick."

This was what I had always seen in Dave, the duality of nature, who could be so strong and fierce, yet very soft and so unsure of himself, who cared but didn’t for the life of him know how to show it.

"Why not just talk to me?" I whispered faintly.

He lifted his face then, and the raw emotion swimming in his eyes nearly undid me. "I don't know. I thought… you were better off without my ass."

"Dave," I said, stepping close, close enough to feel the warmth of his body through his suit. "You're my best friend. You could never drag me down. I've missed you so much. And I love you."

He drew in a breath, his shaking hand holding out the flowers. "I don't really deserve your forgiveness, but I'm asking for it anyway. Because I love you too…”

The earnestness in his voice, the way his eyes shone with tears he repeatedly blinked away, broke through the last of my defenses. I took the bouquet from his hands, my fingers brushed against his.

"I forgive you," I said, meaning every word. "I just want things to be okay between us again. I've missed you so much, Dave."

HIs breath caught, and suddenly he was tugging me into his arms, squeezing me tight. It was the first time he’d ever hugged me.

I wound my arms tight around him, pressing my face into his chest, inhaling the scent of him. Faint leather, and the usual faint musk of cigarettes was replaced with cologne.

"I missed you too," he whispered against my hair.

Finally, he pulled back far enough to see me. His eyes were still red, but the depression in them had been mellowed and replaced by something warmer, something that made my heart skip a beat.

"Will you dance with me?" he whispered, he was afraid of breaking the spell.

I nodded, feeling that I couldn't trust my voice. He took my hand and led me off to the edge of the dance floor, where it was dark and the music wasn't so loud. He took me in his arms and something about this felt right, being this intimate.

As we began to dance, he held me, his hands firm on my hips. I laid my head against his chest, listening to the beat of his heart. It was all so familiar, despite it being my first time hearing it.

"I was afraid of losing you," he admitted. "Afraid I'd already lost you. That's why I thought if I pushed away, it wouldn't hurt as bad that way.”

I grabbed him harder, feeling my heart break for the amount of pain he'd been lugging around. "You never lost me, and you never will."

He breathed shakily as he continued. "You’re the best thing in my life, and I’ve been a prick.”

"Yeah," I teased, looking up through my lashes at him, with a little smile. "You kind of have been."

He chuckled, the movement rumbling in his chest. "I deserve that.”

"But I'm glad you're here now," I added. “Please, don’t leave me again.”

“Never.”

#mustainegf #fanfic #reqs open #fanfiction #request #metallica #megadeth x reader #megadeth smut #megadeth imagines #megadeth fanfiction #megadeth #dave mustaine fanfiction #dave mustaine fluff #dave mustaine x you #dave mustaine x oc #dave mustaine x reader #dave mustaine fic #dave mustaine imagines #dave mustaine

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joffyworld · 8 days ago

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COTL Freaky Tierlist

ALRIGHT LISTEN UP CHUCKLEFUCKS

I'm about to drop some life changing lore and if you can't handle it, that's tough titties my brothers, sisters and theys. If you don't agree with this tier list, you're either a normal person (in which case why are you here run for the hills) or you're so damn freaky that God forgot that was possible when he made me.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, FROM LEAST TO MOST FREAKY:

Kallamar - Need I say more? This loveable twink is soft as his husbands knickers and by God would we not have him any other way. This fucker can't even fathom anything beyond the most painfully dull missionary imaginable, and that's just as an excuse to cuddle more afterwards. "But Joffy" I hear you say, "He's a renowned slut he should be in A!" Wrong. He couldn't be more vanilla, it's all an act and anyone with more than 3 spouses is just fucking lying at that point. Cmon, he may be a God, but deep inside that cowards octopussy is a love for the mundane.

Heket - Controversial I know. But hear me out here. Heket has spent all her life getting fucked by life, she has literally no time for your stupid fleshy appendages, and to top it off she's the most desperately useless lesbian this side of the lands of the old faith. Renowned from Darkwood to Anchordeep, this bitch is fucking stupid when it comes to "rizzing a shawty" and it shows because she spends all her time yapping about the good ol' days. She's only slightly freakier than Kallamar because she's probably into being burned by cigarettes or some shit, but let's face facts. Inexperience guides this poor phrog into the D tier, despite her aversion to "D" to begin with.

Leshy - This stupid dumb stupid worm barely knows that sex exists, and if you asked him what his favourite position is he'd say "1st" and then promptly challenge you to a footrace. The God of Chaos has no time for ropes and rails, but he's at least got a good heart and is pretty gay for that cat. I've watched this stupid fucker get divorced in two different AU's because he couldn't live with the guilt, you think he's surviving post-nut clarity? No. Enough said, he's keeping it clean and calm in the bedroom, and that cat couldn't be happier about that considering his daily life is fucking mental. Keep the Chaos outside, inside? Domestic worm only.

Goat - Now this is where it gets tricky, you might think that the gruff exterior of a mass murdering psychopath is enough to demonstrate a willingness to get tied upside down and spank the monkey till the sun don't shine. But brother, let me tell you, it ain't fuckin true. Don't get me wrong, this goat can fuck, and boy does he, but most of the time it's all bark no bite in the flirting department. Easily flustered, puts up an external image of punk-rock to hide that he's an utter cinnamon bun, the whole works. That being said, with a long term partner? Buckle up. That crown isn't dildo-purple for no reason, prepare for bliss and potential bliss-ters.

Lamb - OKAY HOLD YOUR HORSES this is gonna be a tough one. You've gotta be thinking, that's either wayyy too high for this silly lil fella, or wayyy to low for this absolute cock devouring demon, but let me remind you, this one here is subjective. This is the only character I've seen written as everything from an asexual to a violent and sadistic cannibal, so what fairer rating than the exact middle? It truly does depends, if you're on your "cannibalism is routine and fun" shit then you're gonna be rocketing right up there, straight to S baby, unless you have some kind of twisted mentality you need checked by a licensed psychiatrist to somehow think that's tame; not to shame it mind you. But if you're more on the side of the lamb's that typically get posted by a cuter artist, than you're gonna be rocking a D or even an F. This little fuzzy fucker is traumatized, some type of gay no matter what, and certainly a wildcard, and what better way to celebrate that then with a middle-of-the-road approach? Besides, their most famous partner is certainly a bit more repressed, which leads us to:

Narinder - Are we surprised? This fuzzy little furball has been trapped in prison for 1000 years with his two kids and NOTHING ELSE to do except hope he can get back on the market. The moment he's freed, it's gonna be hell unleashed, but thankfully 99% of the time he's either so angry or so oblivious it turns into a slowburn of passion with his fuzzy lil sheepguy that he definitely "doesn't" have a thing for. But, as the well versed know, this motherfucker has seen shit, and being the God of Death is gonna give you a weird taste in, well, "tastes" than a normal life will. I mean really, the guys fuckin surrounded by miserable dead people all day, he needs stress relief and his enthusiasm for revenge borders on the horny-sided. This guy fucks, but mostly gets fucked, and remains The One Who Bottoms in almost every AU. Cmon people, if you've read this far you've fuckin seen it with your own eyes, do I really to lecture about it more?

The Mura™ - The fucker that started it all. I bet until now you thought I wouldn't include this loveable spider and awful mother-sibling of 4, but here we are. This goddamn spider has single-parented a family of genocidal psychopaths since history started being recorded, and to match that then had to almost literally kill one of their own brother-kid-things to save the others. Stressed and in need of relief? Check. You know what makes a motherfucker freaky? Repression, and this spider is goddamn dripping in it (pun intended) and is ready to burst. I myself may be a Shamura aroace truther, but if I have to put a letter on it, it's 100% in the universes where this spider fucks. Copulates, eats your head, kills your family mid-coitus, the whole shebang, but boy is that gonna be the best last nut you'll ever bust. This spider's an expert, literally the God of War and by God are they gonna wage war on your holes, not to mention ALSO being the God of Wisdom? I mean come on, somebody had to write the Kama Sutra, and it was this horny bastard

And that's it

You may have questions, you may have alternative takes, to be honest I'll probably change my mind the moment I hit post and remember that actually Heket deepthroated a glizzy on the 5th of October last year, but honestly? Who gives a shit. These gods be gay people, that's all that matters.

Goodnight, Lamb Bless, and may you never encounter The Mura during ovulation. Godspeed soldiers, amen.

#cw suggestive #cw sex mention #cw swearing #cotl #cult of the lamb #cotl bishops #cult of the lamb bishops #shoutout to cconfusedkat you inspired this #sorry kat but your Mura got me cooking #poor allure :(#If anyone sees this #I'm sorry #but I'm also not #we've all wondered #stay safe all of you #love you all #back to wholesome programming now :3 #JoffyJoff

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twirlingsmilingwriting · 11 months ago

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Tolerate It pt. 3 || Young! Coriolanus Snow X reader

"Took this dagger in me and removed it, gained the weight of you then lose it... If its all in my head tell me now. Tell me I've got it wrong somehow, I know my love should be celebrated but you tolerate it"

You don't need to read pt 1 to understand what is happening but if you want to ITS HERE

Part two is a little necessary but you'll prob catch on. Part two HERE

TLDR: Truly feeling like the luckiest person alive when your former classmate and short-term boyfriend asked you to marry him. Not even a year into the marriage and also a year into his presidency does the original love and admiration you felt for him start to dissipate. You can't help but feel trapped and tricked into a marriage in which he may have never loved you to begin with.

Warnings: Angst, Love-Bombing, marriage, gender ambiguous reader, typical snow tags (manipulation), alcohol, alluding to sexual acts but not described, kissing, unclear motives, crying, death, the reader being so delulu and manipulated omg, slight classism, self unaliving, blood

WORD COUNT: 7k

A/N: This is a dialogue-heavy one. Lots of yappin today y'all. Also a LOT and I mean a LOT darker than the others. I POSTED THIS LAST NIGHT BUT FORGOT TO PUT ANY TAGS SO I GOTTA REPOST IT

The morning light peered through the curtains of our bedroom ever so slightly, just enough that I could feel the warmth on my nose. I scrunched my face and squirmed under the covers. It wasn't until I felt the weight of his body move from beside me and get out of bed, that I reached my arm out for Coriolanus just to be greeted with nothing. I fluttered my eyes open and looked over. I watched intently while he threw on some clothes. God, he was gorgeous. Strikingly blond curls bouncing while he moved, his toned body with broad shoulders, a thin waist, those blue eyes and sharp jaw, he was so stunning. I love my husband so much. I whispered a quick 'good morning' to him and all he could do was hum in response. I sat up in the bed and used the sheet to cover myself up.

"Where are you going, Darling?"

"I have some business to attend to. You wouldn't understand, my beautiful empty head."

Aww. He called me beautiful. He gave me a quick glance before heading out and slamming the door behind him. I got out of bed and scoured the room for something decent to put on. Clothes from the night before had been scattered and I knew I'd have to add laundry to today's agenda. I picked up a white silk shirt from atop the dress and I threw the shirt over my head, I let out a soft sigh, looking over at myself in the tall gold mirror taking note of the smudged makeup and eyeliner that had dried in blackened streaks down my face from last night's tears. Tiny hickies decorated my neck and collarbones and I couldn't stop the smile that spread on my face from the joy I felt from Coriolanus claiming me as his. Gratitude is the best way I can describe the feeling. I am married to the most powerful man in Panem. What could I have done to deserve this?

Our relationship got rocky sometimes, yes, but he was just busy. I can't help but blame myself for how he was treating me after we got married. To be fair, he did just become president. I can't even imagine how stressful that must've been for him. It made sense why it felt like he had no time for me. Last night he admitted he never even knew I felt so neglected, it must've been my fault. Clearly, he loves me right?

Last night, I felt so loved, the way he kissed me and wrapped his arms around me, his aroma filled my senses. He loves me so much, if he didn't he wouldn't be showing me off to a whole nation of people right?

I kept asking myself for reassurance, but I had my answer, no one just marries someone they don't love.

Right?

Of course, he does. I remember when it started, it was real, so real. He's just been so tired these past few months. He has his reasons and I should understand that I can't be so selfish to be in his life taking up too much space and time. I am lucky for the sentences I will get in the story of a monumental man. Looking in the mirror of the vanity, I took a deep breath and smiled in contentment. My eyes continued to scan the display. The vanity was a white desk and drawer set with a large and extravagant mirror outlined with gold. I had hand-painted vines of ivy on the wood. The desk had makeup and my rose-scented perfume. Honestly, I always preferred fruity and sweet scents but Coryo loves it more when I smell like roses. My fingers tapped the delicate glass bottle before I placed it back down and walked to the window to look over the garden where we had the party last night.

Tables were still set up and cups littered the lawn. I giggled a little bit, remembering the fun people were having dancing around the area without a care in the world. There was always a certain type of peace that came after parties when everyone left. Similar to nostalgia where it's that strong sense of bliss but also a certain emptiness that comes from the drop from high emotions and energy to nothingness. Still, the memories of the fun of last night came back to me. A few men dressed in white peacekeeper uniforms started to file into the area and I cocked an eyebrow up in confusion. They must be coming to clean up the trash. My eyes followed them.

That's when I saw it.

The body of a tall man with ginger hair lay lifeless on his back on the stone pathway of the garden. It was the same man that I had talked with last night, Curtis. His eyes were rolled back into his head and speckles of blood could be seen on the corners of his mouth. A cup was held loosely in his hand. I gasped and my jaw hung low in shock. How could this have happened? Did he choke on something? Got into a fight? The peacekeepers started to harshly pick up his body and filed him out. Did Coryo know about this? The blood quickly left my face and I felt a sinking sense of doom in my stomach.

I had only known the man for a moment, but I felt like he was a good man. He didn't deserve whatever happened to him. The peacekeepers left the area and then moments later the maids came in to clean. Tears started to prick the corner of my eyes before I gulped heavily. Maybe he just drank too much last night. The red was just dried wine...

Yes

That made sense right...?

I had to think of something to ease my mind. Maybe I could ask Coryo about it later. More and more maids filed into the area, their black uniforms making the whole scene previously seem more grim. Red started appearing in my teary-eyed peripheral vision and I quickly shut the curtains. My chest heaved up and down as I struggled to catch my breath. I had to collect myself. I probably didn't understand the situation fully, Coriolanus knows what's going on, he always does. I won't worry about it until he comes home. I walked over the desk and wrote little notes for him on a few pieces of paper, scattering them around the bedroom. Then, I went to take a shower. I was going to have lunch with my mother today, I had to get ready.

The doorbell rang and I walked over to answer it. Instantly, my mother had wrapped her arms around me bringing me into a warm hug.

"Y/N! Sweetheart I missed you so much it's been so long," she spoke softly and I couldn't help the childish smile that dragged across my face.

"I haven't seen you since the wedding mom I missed you too," she loosened her grip on me and walked into the house.

"Wow... you truly are living in a life of luxury now sweetie look at this place... I see you put your little artistic flair on things haha," she joked and awed at the size of the house.

"Oh, the little paintings? I didn't think other people would notice them haha, after I dust I like to add the little things and details around. I've been hoping Coryo would notice but he's just a man, and he's so busy and tired all the time I can't blame him for not noticing. You should look at the plates when we eat today! I've been trying to add things to the table wear, which makes eating a lot more fun."

She continued to look around and I watched intently while her eyes followed the small roses, vines, clouds, and butterflies I had painted on the pillars and edges of the house. She then brought her attention back to me and pressed her lips into a thin smile, a glint of sadness was painted into her stormy eyes.

"Sweetheart, you look so thin, are you eating well? He doesn't have you on some crazy diet does he? With the amount of money you guys have I feel like you should be eating three-course meals for every meal..."

"Mom please~ I'm an adult, don't worry about me so much."

"That doesn't answer my question."

"Come on let's go sit down at the table, foods' almost ready." I interlocked my arm with hers and started to guide her to the dining room. We sat facing each other. The chefs cooking could be heard faintly.

"How is the married life treating you?"

"Um... Well honestly mom, it's been rough. I felt like the original spark of our relationship had been extinguished the moment he put this ring on my finger, he had grown very cold and I swear there were days that went by where he didn't even look at me but last night we talked it out. He didn't even know I felt like that so I can't be mad at him"

"Sweetheart, I've been here for about 10 minutes and I can't help but continue to pick up these little details that are showing he isn't treating you the way you deserve. You are smarter than this Y/N I raised a strong fighting spirit, you survived a war with us and never let that darkness cloud the brightness that is your light but right now honey, you seem sad. I don't think your romantic spark is the only thing he's diminishing sweetheart, he's burning you out." Her hand reached out for mine and we interlocked fingers. She looked deeply into my eyes and I watched as the concern grew in hers.

"No mom it's not like that. He's just busy, you should know how hard he's working. I know my place is to sit and listen to him, he's so much wiser than I am. He's a great man and he loves me," I started to get a little defensive but tried to hold my temper. Her lips pursed and she gave my hand another squeeze. It was then the chefs came out and placed our plates in front of us. We sat in silence for a moment while we started to eat.

"You're stubborn I know. The more we tell you to run from him the further it pushes you away from us and closer to him. You should be celebrated, you do so much for this man and he gives you nothing. This... this just doesn't seem healthy."

"Mom. I'm fine. I'm breathing. My health is fine"

"But your soul isn't."

Her words spit venom into me and I froze in place and listened. "Truly, what kind of man doesn't let his spouse see their family more than once every few months. I had to beg him to be able to see you today. We all miss you at home. Hell, I miss you."

Shock ran through my body while I spoke. "He told me you never reached out for these past few months." A chuckle left her lips. "Does that man do anything but lie? I shouldn't be surprised... politicians will always say what you want to hear and what benefits them."

"Mom I- can we please talk about something else? I don't appreciate you disrespecting my husband. I shouldn't have ever said anything. This is why he doesn't want you around is you keep disrespecting him. I promise mom everything is okay. Just rocky sometimes and that's mostly my fault."

Her face scrunched up and she looked away to avoid eye contact. She frowned before taking another bite of the food.

"It just hurts to see you like this... I almost feel like I should've stopped it sooner-"

"Mom," I cut her off and slammed my fist on the table slightly. She quickly shut up again before her lips parted.

"How was the party last night?"

"Lovely, the capital parties are always a joy. Coryo even made a toast to me at the end of the night it was so heartwarming." I smiled, happy she changed the subject. I started to gush about how sweet Coryo was last night to try and defend himself from my mother. I don't understand why all of my loved ones just couldn't seem to like him.

"Did he talk to you?" She asked tilting her head up.

"Who?"

"Curtis."

My face went pale and my jaw dropped. Flashbacks to what I had seen that morning rushed into my mind and I sat there horrified. First was the shock then the confusion.

"He's a friend of your older brother. He's been living with us for awhile while his new house gets built. Your brother asked him personally to come to the party last night to try and talk to you. We weren't sure if we were going to be able to see you today so we were trying to find any way to talk to you and make sure you were okay."

"He um... yes I do believe I talked to him. He was very charming, sweet. He reminded me of someone I used to know but we only talked for a little last night..." I was in a daze while I spoke. I didn't want to talk about Coryo's jealous outburst or what I saw that morning.

"That's good to hear. Y/N how was he last night? He didn't come home last night though. Was he drunk when you left? We've been worried sick."

"He... no he seemed very sober though he did have the confidence of a drunk man." I tried to joke to distract from the adrenaline and fear that was pumping through my veins.

"Sweetheart I can tell when you're keeping things from me. Please, darling you can tell me anything, I'm your mother"

I avoid her eye contact like the plague and continued to eat my food, struggling to swallow.

"It's nothing really, I'm just a little tired today that's all. Mom, eat your food please, it's delicious. How's dad?"

Her suspicious mind was reflected in her suspicious eyes. She was not going to let this go so easily. I could see the same grim expression I had on my face from earlier start to spread on hers.

"The first thing I ever heard about your husband was that any person who got too close to him ended up dead, missing or disgraced. I truly hope you don't follow in those same steps."

"Mom, you guys told me that same line over and over again before we got married and it's not even true. Name one person who he's done that to"

She scoffed and spoke quietly.

"Lucy Gray."

I raised an eyebrow at her in confusion.

"Who?"

"I don't believe you watched The Hunger Games this year, you never liked the blood. There truly isn't any way to confirm this now but Coriolanus was in charge of mentoring a girl from District 12 named Lucy Gray. She was a songbird and I remember the first time I watched her sing on television, it was breathtaking. Rumors spread that your husband fell in love with her and planned to run off with her and then one day, she disappears. Not a single trace left but he returned. He returned to the capital and mysteriously got gifted a scholarship and an internship. That is a shady man."

"Respectfully mom I think you're telling folk tales right now. He told me I was his first love, the first one to make him feel so alive so that can't be true. I've never even heard of this girl. Wouldn't my classmates have said something?"

She shrugged. "I wouldn't say anything to upset the man suspected of such crimes." Suddenly, a peacekeeper walked into the dining room and another followed in. Doors slammed around us and one spoke in a booming voice. "By orders of President Snow, we have been assigned to escort you out of here ma'am" They got on either side of my mom and grabbed her arms.

"There must be some sort of mistake here, it's barely 2, he said I could be here till 3! Let me down!"

I stood there frozen and helpless, I had no clue what to do. I yelled at them to wait but they pulled her out of her seat then started to head out. She started kicking and tried to fight back. "Let me say goodbye! I need a hug! I am the mother here, it's my right to see my child! He sent you guys here huh? Can't stand my kid hearing the truth? All this that's happening to me is his fault!"

"Mama! Goodbye! I love you!"

"He did it Y/N! You know he did it! Don't let it happen to you my love! Fight, there must be a way out! You're better than this. I love you!"

She shouted while they escorted her out. Her voice echoed around the room whispering the words 'He did it'. As much as I shook my head I couldn't stop thinking about it. Sickening silence bounced against the walls while my head ran back everything that had just happened. I couldn't help but let warm tears fall from my eyes while I sat back down in my chair. I'm so confused. I just needed my husband right now. A maid walked in and cleaned up the table and I sat in the chair and cried.

I laid down in bed, sitting up staring at the ceiling. The bed was as comfortable as sleeping on a cloud but I couldn't sleep, nothing could calm the storm in my head. The door handle turned and I saw Coryo glace into the room. His blue eyes made eye contact with mine as he stepped into the room slowly. He shut the door behind him and started to loosen his tie.

"Darling, you're still up?"

"I can't sleep..." I admitted and watched as his plump lips parted to expel a sigh. He started to change into his pajamas.

"Why dear?" He started to crawl into bed and pulled me into him with his strong arms.

"Can I ask you a question?" I felt his grip on me tighten before he nodded and hummed a soft 'yes' into the air. A sigh left my lungs and I pressed my hand against my temples. Where do I even start?

"Coryo... have you ever killed anyone before?"

"W- what?"

I tipped my head up and looked deep into his blue eyes to search for any form of sincerity. "Please be honest with me... please..."

"Darling what could have ever put these sorts of ideas in your pretty little head?"

"Coryo that's not important now please answer me. I just want your honesty here, if you're honest I will not judge you, I- I'll still love you."

The only emotion I could see on his face was panic. He removed his arm from my body and I started to panic in response. He had just started being nice to me again and I was worried I pushed him away. My big mouth just couldn't stay shut.

"Y/N, of course I haven't. Who do you perceive me as? Some kind of monster? The only person I have ever killed is my past self and he had to die so I could be the man I am today, a man ready to love you the way you deserve."

He was rambling and his lack of eye contact made me feel uneasy. I wanted to believe him, I truly did but with the way he was acting, I couldn't wholeheartedly believe him and that made me feel sick. I should not be this distrustful of my husband. I started to zone off, lost in deep thought when his hand met my jaw and he positioned my head up to look at him. "Y/N you trust me don't you? I've done everything for you, you should trust me darling." He planted a quick kiss on my forehead. "I- I believe you Coryo." He smiled down and then pressed a kiss to my lips. I melted against his touch and placed my hands to cup his face. When we pulled away I still couldn't shake the questions that flooded my head. Remembering what my mother said, I couldn't help myself from the words spilling out of my mouth.

"Coryo... one last question, Who is Lucy Gray?"

His lips parted and his eyes frantically started to search my face. "How did you hear about her?"

"Coryo?"

Anger started to flood his eyes and his jaw clenched. Regret filled every part of my body and I sat up on the bed, keeping my hands on his face. "I'm sorry Coryo, is that a touchy subject I-" He was quiet for a moment as if planning what he was going to say.

"She... she was a nobody girl from District 12. I had to mentor her for The Hunger Games that year for my school project. I came out on top, Snow always lands on top."

He spoke through gritted teeth while he looked into my eyes, scanning my face for a reaction. What he told me so far aligned exactly with what my mom told me. This was even more worrying. There had to be more. He was keeping something from me. He could sense my distrust and started to speak again, more carefully.

"Darling, do you want the full truth?"

"Yes Coryo..."

He let out a heavy sigh. "She was my first girlfriend. We had a short fling and then she cheated on me." My jaw dropped. "Oh Coryo I'm so sorry..." I reached out and pulled him into a tight hug, tangling my fingers in his blond locks of hair. "It's okay darling, you didn't know. You don't know a lot of things." His hands started to rub my back up and down while I held him close.

"I never loved her anyways, I could never love someone so low class and trashy."

In an odd way I felt almost comforted by that statement. It meant he wasn't lying to me, I was his first love, right? He placed his hands on my stomach and pushed me away from the hug. My arms fell back down to my sides and I stared at him with deep remorse in my eyes. He smiled again, "It's okay Darling, is there anything else I can answer for you to put your troubled mind at ease?" Truthfully, I had a lot more questions but I felt bad and I didn't want to push him away more, not when our relationship was so delicate. I shook my head 'no' and he hummed before laying down on the bed. I followed suit and he turned his back to me.

"Goodnight"

"Goodnight..."

"I love you"

And then I was met with silence.

The next day passed and it was business as usual but I still couldn't get my mother's voice out of my head. My ears rang with every corner I turned. I saw Coryo's panicked face every time I closed my eyes after I asked him if he had killed anyone. It made me sick to my stomach but I didn't believe him. I do believe my mom was wrong about Lucy Gray though, he was genuinely hurt when I asked about her. I couldn't even imagine anyone wanting to cheat on him. Especially a girl from District 12, the opportunity to be with a capital man, especially one as charming, smart, and talented as Coryo should be a blessing. My poor husband probably had to deal with so much then.

When he came home he didn't talk to me that day. He couldn't even look me in the eye really. I felt wildly embarrassed and guilty. Of course, he was pulling away again, I pushed him. I should've just kept my pretty mouth shut like he had asked. My mom must have been mistaken. They don't know him like I do. It was nice to know how much they cared about me though.

Coriolanus slept in his office that night. I assume he had business to attend to so I just sat and tried to sleep alone in bed.

The next morning I woke up late and decided to try and make it up to Coryo by trying to leave more "I love you" notes around the house. I painted a portrait of a lake on one of his mugs, adding rose and ivy details to the handle. Stumbling down the hallway in the afternoon I walked by Coryo's office. I knew I wasn't allowed in there but damn it I was so curious. There were two maids in there talking and I silently eavesdropped.

"Careful when dusting that... This man has a lot of secrets and what's in those vials one I do not want to know about."

The other laughed and they continued to clean up.

"Isn't it odd we decided to have such a liar for a president?"

'Liar?' I thought. Why does everyone seem to think he's a liar?

"Yeah but he's great for the economy and the future of Panem."

Silence filled the room and then they both started laughing again.

"That doesn't seem to make it any better, then again, let's not bite the hand that feeds us."

They started to finish cleaning his office and once they left I snuck in. My hands traced around the walls of his office, it was small and packed with things. On his desk lay a little book filled with names and numbers, a pack of matches, a single white rose, and the vials the maids were talking about. Curiously, I reached for it. It was probably liquor or something. I picked it up carefully and examined it. It was clear and sealed shut. Cautiously, I started to unscrew the top and placed a drop of it on my finger. The liquid burned through my skin and I yelped loudly in pain. I grabbed a napkin and wiped it off my hand. I screamed in pain and the smell of burning flesh filled the room. Hot tears ran down my face as I removed the napkin and saw the damage that it left. My finger was red, hot, and my flesh was melted in the shape of a circle where the drop had been placed. Gasping desperately for breath, I tightly closed the lid of the vile and put it right back where I found it. I continued to cry from the searing pain, my finger throbbed and I whimpered desperately trying to keep quiet. I picked up my trash and made sure I left no trace of myself in there while I rushed to the kitchen, rinsing my finger under the water. Once the burning had gone away I slid down and laid my back against the kitchen cabinet.

"F- fuck fuck fuck- fucking poison. WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE HAVE POISON?"

I started to rock back and forth while I watched the skin around the burn turn purple. This must've been some sort of divine punishment to me for going into his office knowing I wasn't supposed to. One maid heard my wailing and hurried over to help me. She put an ointment on my finger before wrapping it up in a band-aid and above all, she didn't ask a question. I couldn't tell if that meant she was used to this kind of thing or if she was trained not to. I picked myself up off the floor and continued to go about my day and pretend that nothing happened.

Coryo didn't come to bed that night, I wasn't too sure if he had even come home honestly. I fell asleep alone again with nothing but my thoughts.

The next morning I was awakened by a rough hand shaking my shoulder. I yawned and opened my eyes to be met with Coryo's blue ones. They were deep and full of concern. He was sitting next to me on the bed still in his work clothes. I felt that pit of grief deep in my stomach again. Something was wrong, greatly wrong. "Coryo?" I asked, trying to remain calm.

"Y/N..."

"Coryo what's the matter?"

He sighed with deep remorse and said the worst news I had ever heard in my life. "Your parents... Y/N... your whole family they... um... their house burned down last night and the firefighters couldn't make it in time. When they arrived there, they searched the house but not a single survivor was found. They did find this though in your mothers room," He handed me a single stuffed doll. The doll was mine from when I was a child, it didn't have a single burn on it. I held it in my hands and sat staring at it in silence. They were gone. My whole family was gone. The tears threatened to spill but I felt so sick of crying lately. Why did my life feel like it was falling apart so fast? I just wanted a happy life as a newly wed and I have gotten nothing remotely close to that.

"Coryo... What's wrong with me? I'm like a bomb, anyone who cares about me either leaves me or dies... Am I cursed? I didn't even get to say goodbye. I didn't even get to hug them or- or- or see how big my little brother got or how smart my older brother is. I- I- I should've seen them more," I started weep, my tears starting to fall onto the doll below me, as if my tear were staining the innocence of the girl I used to be. Coriolanus grabbed me and held me close as I started to cry furiously into his chest. He planted a soft kiss on the top of my head and tried to whisper things to calm me down. His hands rubbed up and down my back.

"Darling, it's okay. You're going to be okay. You have me. I'll be here for you always. I make you happy, right? Your parents were always trying to keep you away from me... they didn't know you like I do. They don't know what you need darling but I do. We are going to get through this together, okay?'

I could barely process what he was saying through my tears. I just nodded into his chest and he continued to let me cry. I felt so safe in his arms in this moment. He was right, I do need him.

I couldn't get out of bed for days. The grief struck me overwhelmingly. I couldn't think straight. I just lay in bed and stared at the ceiling for hours at a time. When the foggy mist of the shock that had clouded my rationale finally faded I was left with the remaining thoughts. What was even real in this life anymore? I remember feeling so sad when almost none of my friends showed up to my wedding. I felt so alone and isolated but at least I knew I still had my family and my husband to be there for me and now, all I had was Coriolanus. I love him, I need him, but he's the type that gives love and then takes it away.

Maybe my mom was right... Maybe I do deserve better. This relationship isn't healthy. Has it ever been? Even when I was first falling for him, I always viewed him as better than me, which he is but shouldn't we be equal? Maybe... I'm too reliant on the love he gives me. I hate that. I hate how big of a hold he has on me. The way my happiness is always at the tip of his fingers, it makes me feel so weak. His hold on me is degrading. The worst part is, he knows how strong his power over me is. He knows me. He's learned me inside and out and he knows how to keep me under his palm.

My mom was right. The night of the party, he started yelling at me then when I threatened to leave him he switched. How could- how could I be so stupid? He switched because he didn't want me to leave him. He needed me to be there for him, to be his shining sparkling eye candy, to complete his perfect picture of domestic living, to be his waiting servant. And then when we made love that night, it must've not meant anything to him. He knows I believe everything people do has a purpose, he knows I don't ever want to exchange sex like a handshake. He slept with me to prove to me that he 'loves me' but that can't be true. I love him, his heart will never have space for me in it. No man treats someone he loves the way he treats me. I've been aware of this but every time I've gotten the courage to leave him he pulled me back in.

He's smart, he's manipulative. He's been doing it to me for months now. How could I be so stupid? Love is the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me. He found his wide-eyed dreamer and just needed to ruin me. Even recently, he used my parent's death to try and make me even more dependent on him and it worked. I can't live without him.

"He did it"

His desk, the poison, no sane and normal man keeps poison in his office. It's making me think. The boy... the one my parents sent. Did Coryo know he was going to be there? He must've, the party was invite-only, you don't just sneak into the capital parties. The last thing Curtis did before he left was pour himself another cup of the juice. When Coryo ushered me into the house, I heard a man coughing from the garden but I didn't look, I couldn't, I was pushed away. His body the next morning... He had blood on his mouth. I remember learning from the academy that some poisons often makes you cough up blood before you die. Coryo had the poison. Could it be... did Coryo murder him?

"He did it"

Before I looked away when I saw his body in the garden, a glint of red could be seen in my vision. Was that his red coat?

"He did it"

Oh my god, the matches. He told me my parents house burned down.

"He did it"

The book with the names and numbers... who's names were in that book? What were the numbers?

"He did it"

I got out of bed for the first time in ages and rushed down to his office. My bones ached from the lack of mobility. I reached his office and rushed in. His notebook was gone. I started opening his drawers frantically. Finally, I found it. I opened up the pages and that was the last bit of proof I needed. His journal had the names and addresses of the different capital citizens, one page dedicated to every member of my family.

"He did it"

The matches were missing fully. Not anywhere to be found.

"He did it"

The doll. My doll. The doll probably reminded him of me, just a pretty object he can play with whenever he wants something to hold. It didn't have a single burn mark on it at all, he must've gotten it before the fire. Either that means my family let him into the house before he burned it down or he's been keeping it for a while.

"He did it"

My mom did say she had been trying to reach out to me for ages but couldn't. He was stopping them. He wanted to keep me isolated. I really didn't know who I was marrying. I married a murderer.

"He did it"

I couldn't continue to live with him but I can't live without him. It made me feel sick how much love I still felt for him even knowing he had been trying to destroy me from the inside out. I can't let him take my light. My mom really was right. Everyone who gets close to him ends up dead, missing, or disgraced. It's my turn to pick which path I was going to be.

My heart raced as I ripped a page out of his notebook and wrote a note for him, leaving it on the desk. I reached over and grabbed that familiar vile of poison and unscrewed the top. The cold glass hit my lips and I drank the contents like a shot. My heart raced and I started coughing profusely, everything burned from the inside out. Blood started to flow out the corners of my mouth but for once, I wasn't crying. Mama, I'm coming.

"He did it"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Coriolanus Snows POV

I'd be lying if I said I didn't cry when I found Y/N dead on the floor of my office. Blood trickled down the side of their mouth and they were holding the tiny vial I had on my desk. Y/N knew not to go into my office and frankly, I was shocked to see that it happened in there. On my desk was a note that said: "Till death do us part". I screamed loudly and felt like my body wasn't my own as I feverishly picked up the body and walked to the nearest in-house medic. Tears poured down my face. How dare Y/N just decide to selfishly leave me like this? After everything I had done? All the trouble I went through? It was ridiculous. I remember thinking, "I had you."

When I first met Y/N I remember believing that they were the embodiment of everything good in the world and the embodiment of what I needed in a partner. Loyal, innocent, trusting, naive, controllable. Truly, there isn't any room in this world for such goodness. My darling needed to be tougher or the cold world would do nothing but ruin them. I tried to make them tougher but their unconditional love was annoying at times but I tolerated it. No matter what I did to push Y/N away, they insisted on loving me till the end, but why? And if they did love me so much why would they leave me like this?

The medic couldn't do anything. Y/N was long gone by the time I got there. So much wasted time and potential. I don't think I will marry again. Not for many years at least. Just when it is time for me to have heirs I will marry. Gives my future wife less time to escape. I have to marry someone cruel, someone whom I can never seem to care about, especially not love. Y/N's crippling kindness almost had me falling at the end and that was dangerous.

The funeral was lavish. My darling was beloved by the public. Many mourned for weeks. It was shocking. As much as I tried to not care, the energy of the house felt so different now. It was a wasteland of what once was. Dust collected in every nook and cranny. I stumbled into the house and stood still, letting the world spin around me for a moment when I tilted my head up and noticed something I hadn't seen before, paintings, hundreds of them. Y/N painted tons of things around the pillars and walls. They were beautiful. Ivy and roses, clouds and sunshine. I forgot how truly artistically talented Y/N was. My eyes followed how the ivy traveled around the pillars. Ivy was a great metaphor for Y/N, beautiful, and simple, but still a pest that will grow all over you if you aren't too careful.

"Sir, Welcome home. We have prepared dinner for you." the butler said, pulling me out of my trance.

"Thank you and can we get someone to repaint this room ASAP, I need some things removed.

The whole house ended up being repainted. I never noticed how many of those paintings were left. Even on the furniture, I couldn't escape any of my memories of Y/N anywhere. The notes were the absolute worst. Small pieces of paper everywhere with sweet nothings written on them. "Have a good day", "I love you", "Good morning to Panem's greatest leader" Nowhere was safe. Memories and images circled my brain constantly.

I sat at the table we used to eat at alone, drinking coffee from my mug while reading the newspaper. They still were on the front page. It's been a month since the incident. I sighed and folded the paper, placing it face down on the table. I reached for the mug when I saw it again. A painting of a lake with roses and ivy painted on the handle. The lake... the lake. The lake of District 12,

Lucy Gray

The roses,

My Mother

The Ivy...,

y/n

I shouted at the top of my lungs and threw the mug at the wall. When will I finally be free of the past pests that continue to haunt my life?

A/N: WHAT DID YOU GUYS THINK??? It is almost 5 AM and I stayed up all night writing this, I hope you guys liked it. let me know plz. Now accepting requests for new stories, perhaps with new characters :)))

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romana-after-dark · 9 months ago

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Room's on Fire 4: Tolerate It

Dark!Santiago Garcia x Fem!Reader Dark!Francisco Morales x Fem!Reader Dark!William Miller x Fem!Reader Dark!Benjamin Miller x Fem!Reader

Also: FishBen, and an assortment of other M/M relationships (no Millercest). Everyone is Bisexual

Series Masterlist: Main Masterlist : MainTaglist

Spotify playlist

Summery: Madonna learns more about her role and the dynamics of the household.

Warnings and Content:

DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT

DUB CON MOSTLY but there WILL BE NON CON. Major character deaths, forced breeding, physical abuse, brainwashing, manipulation, violence, gore, alcoholism/addiction, BIG OLE BLASPHEMY WARNING like this cult appropriates a lot of religious themes and they call reader their Madonna, Santi is called the Pope, like all that stuff. However, this is a cult so I mean. It happens. None of it are my thoughts on religion or meant to make fun of religion or demonize religious people. Disgusting views on virginity. Attempted rape outside the boys. T*m warning. Age gap. Creepy terrible men. Non-reader rape, dub con, violence.

Extra warnings for chapter: 'incubus', emotional abuse, withholding of affection, more panic

This is not meant to be a statement about religion, Christianity, or Catholicism, this is simply my take on a cult. I am a religious person. I understand that some of this may be very offensive to religious people so if you don't like thing like AHS Asylum or Black Mass, maybe consider not reading.

A/n: next chapter things ramp up.

3.6k words

Support writers! Reblog and leave comments!

I wait by the door like I'm just a kid Use my best colors for your portrait Lay the table with the fancy shit And watch you tolerate it If it's all in my head, tell me now Tell me I've got it wrong somehow I know my love should be celebrated But you tolerate it ~Tolerate It, Taylor Swift

Your bed was comfortable, huge, with pillows and soft comforters all around you giving all the comfort surrounding you that you could need. This is a good thing, considering how exhausted you felt all the time. It was not easy keeping 4 men satisfied. Ben was near constant, and although Will took his time with you and both made you cum, it was still a lot. Francisco avoided you, only fucking you when Pope was there. Pope and Francisco… you didn’t know how to take it.

It was strange seeing your husbands kiss, and you struggled with how little Pope’s eyes were on you. It seemed he could only cum when he looked at Francisco.

You woke up in the middle of the night, a cloud of darkness and pillowy soft as you lay on your back. Consciousness came to you slowly, a deep sleep attempted to keep you down, but the feeling between your legs refused to let you sleep. You were tired, so damn tired and so sore, your arms so heavy you couldn’t even lift them feel at the heaviness on your chest. Why did you hear breathing? Was it your own? You wanted to open your eyes but they were almost sealed shut. Panic began to bubble.

You’d heard of incubus’s before, demons that entered you in your sleep and violated you, but that wasn’t possible, was it? You’d remained sexually pure, physically and emotionally faithful to your husbands and them only. You attended prayers and were the model of wifery. This shouldn’t happen to a faithful servant of Divine Mother. Had you done something wrong? Were you not fulfilling your role? Had you been tainted by the actions of your fathers betrayal?

You were scared.

“Shhhhh” A voice whispered, but you were so delirious from the broken sleep cycle you couldn’t recognize if it was a voice you knew. “Shhhhh, go back to sleep…”

Not sure what to do, scared and completely out of control of your body you tried to fight it, tried to fight off the demon on top of you, but there was no energy left.

You sank into sleep as the rhythmic thrusts rocked you back into the haze.

Still tired, still unfocused and unclear, you wake up slowly. When you remember what happened last night, your eyes flash open in a start and the memories come back. They scared you, but the biggest concern was how wet you felt between your legs. Had the demon cum inside you? Were you to become pregnant with a demon's child. Anxious, you throw off the blanket and look down between your legs in your nightgown.

Blood.

You scream, fear from last night clouded any rational judgment and you scream when you see Reyansh.

“What’s going on?!” He rushed in, gun drawn, looking about to room.

“GET OUT!”

He looks back to you, seeing the blood on the bed. He blinks. “Are you… okay?” He looks confused.

It begins to settle on you what happened, and now you’re embarrassed. You throw a pillow at him. “GET! OUT!”

The pillow smacks him right in the face. “Oof!” But after one more check over, eyeing you confused, he leaves.

You got your period. This did not calm your fears. You shouldn’t have your period, you should be pregnant with the savior. Something was wrong, something was horribly fucking wrong and it was somehow your fault. Was last night a nightmare, or were you being haunted? Either way, something was wrong because you were not found worthy.

You were not pregnant.

Bleeding more and more, you needed to take care of this, but you didn’t have any sanitary products… No one expected you to need them.

Wrapping your blanket around your flimsy nightgown, You crack the door open, hands visibly shaking. “Reyansh?”

“Yeah?” He says kindly.

You didn’t want to talk about this with him, as nice as he was. Usually, Jonah was outside your door in the morning. You wanted him. “Um… where’s Jonah?”

“He’s the head of the guard, he went back to his normal duties. I’m gonna be your primary guard.” He chuckles a bit. “Sorry to disappoint.”

No… no you wanted Jonah… you trusted Jonah. “No, um… I want Jonah back, thank you…” You tried to sound in control. You were the Madonna, they needed to listen to you, right?

Reyansh sighs. “I’ll mention to Jonah, but I don’t think that’s happening. Miller wants him focusing on security. He just Jonah be around for a bit because you seemed comfortable.”

Fine. Problem for later. You could feel the blood dripping down. “Well then I want Iris!”

“Why? What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” He sounded concerned.

“Reyanash please”

“It’s monday, she goes shopping on Mondays, it’ll be a few hou-”

“ARE THERE ANY GIRLS IN THIS DAMN BUILDING!” You snap.

There is a bit of silence before he says. “Ah. I’ll be back.”

When he walks away, you slump against the door and fall down, crying. As you bleed and cry into the comforter, you try not to let the panic settle in. It’s okay, it’s going to be okay. They loved you, they wouldn’t throw you out after one month! They loved you, they loved you, they loved you.

Knock Knock

“Come in…” You whisper, defeated and scoot enough for him to slip in, holding tampons and pads. You didn’t know how to use a tampon, only using pads before. You wanted to preserve your virginity.

“I found these. They’re Iris’s, but she won’t mind.” He tries to hand them to you, but you don’t grab them.

“You can set them on the floor…” You whispered, and he does.

“You alright?”

“Yeah. Can you um… if you see Santi, let him know?” Santi was anxiously awaiting to hear if you were pregnant… he’s going to be so disappointed in you.

No one came to see you all day. Will and Ben were out in the town, working, and you didn’t expect Francisco, but the fact Pope didn’t show was enough to know he was angry with you. You had asked to talk to him, but Reyansh had said it “wasn’t the time.”

So, you went to your studio, Reyansh sitting outside, and went to work. You’d been working on a portrait of Pope. He liked to sit and watch you paint from behind your easel, but you didn’t tell him what you were painting. It was almost done, and you were adding the details by memory. You loved to study his face, all the fine lines and grays and sharp features of him as he fucked into you. He didn’t understand how much you adored him, how you relished the intimate moments not for the pleasure he gave, but for the closeness it brought.

But he didn’t look at you like you looked at him. When he did, it was almost too much; his eyes were fiery and alite. He made you feel like the center of the entire world when he dd, but for the most part, he didn’t. Not in bed. When he made love to you, if Francisco wasn’t there his eyes were closed.

“So you aren’t pregnant.” His voice broke through your thoughts.

When you look up from your work, he’s standing in the doorway, arms crossed and hip cocked. He was not pleased.

You will yourself not to cry. “I’m sorry.”

He doesn’t say anything as he stalks forward and you set down your brush. He looks at your painting.

“It’s you.” You whisper. It’s his side profile, the background is in flames.

“Am I burning?” He asks, incredulous.

You were quick to disued the idea that you’d paint any harm happening to your beloved husband whom you adored completely. “No! No, not at all! The, the background is, you see?” You use the brush to gesture to his picture. “You’re perfectly unscathed. It’s meant to represent your power… And maybe me?”

He turns at that. “You?”

You nod. “The priestess… she said, well she likened me to fire.”

Pope scoffs before turning to you again. “The Madonna is fire. The mother of the savior is fire. You’ve yet to prove yourself.” He look another look at your portrait and rolls his eyes. “Needs work.” With that he walked away.

You had a plan.

Maybe the reason you weren’t pregnant is you hadn’t won them over completely. You had Ben, William, and before this, Pope… the missing piece was Francisco.He wanted nothing to do with you, and how could you become pregnant when he didn’t want you? You were supposed to be one, a cohesive unit bound together. You needed him, and you needed to win back Pope.

Iris hadn’t been keen on the idea; she didn’t like people in her space, except for Reyansh it seemed. She allowed you in her kitchen with him if there were tasks she was comfortable letting you handle, or if you promised to stay out of her way. Today,however, you begged and pleaded to take over. You had very few personal items, but you had a cookbook from your mother, and you knew how to use it. It wasn’t like you were an amazing cook; that was Iris, she was incredible, but you were what you were doing.

“C’mooooon” Reyansh said, arms propped up against the table holding up his face as he gazed at her. “Take the night off.”

She laughed, but it wasn’t bad natured. She smiled when she talked to him. You wondered if they were in love, but no one had said anything. You hadn’t wanted to assume… but Reyansh looked her Iris the way Will looked at you.

“It wouldn’t be a night off, I’d have to stay here and make sure she doesn’t fuck it all up because it’s still my responsbility”

“I won’t mess it up!” You insist, following after her as she put groceries away. “I used to cook big meals for my dormitory all the time! And anything goes wrong I’ll take the blame!”

“No.”

You run in front of her, looking at her face pleadingly. “Iris, please, I’m begging you, I need to prove to them I can be a good wife!”

Iris looked at you, and you didn’t care how pathetic you looked. You needed this. She turns to Rey.

“You could work on something here while she cooks, free up a little time tonight.” Did he wink at her?

It’s working, you can see her thinking. “Well… I guess I could work on my sewing… it would be nice to get ahead of work…”

“YES! YES YES YES YES!” You jump and hug her, and you catch her and Reyansh smiling at each other.

It took 2 hours, but you never asked for help once. Rey tried to help, but you wanted it to be all on your own. Instead, he helped Iris darn socks and fix holes and tighten or loosen clothes. At one point, Iris came up to you and checked a few measurements on your body but wouldn’t tell you for what.

The meal was extensive, 7 courses.

Muse-Bouche: Miniature crab cakes with a spicy remoulade sauce.

Soup: Creamy butternut squash soup.

Appetizer: Olives stuffed with blue cheese.

Salad: Arugula and pear salad with a honey mustard dressing.

Main Course: Herb-crusted salmon

Cheese Course: Pepper jack was all you had, but it’d do.

Dessert: Dark chocolate mousse with raspberries.

When it was done, you were sweating, ready to run off and change before helping serve the appetizer course with Iris, when she stopped you.

“Here” Iris places a fabric in your hands, lavender and lacy.

You blink. “What’s this?”

She pushed you out the door towards the bathroom to change. “A new dress, thought tonight was a good night to debut it.”

It was stunning. All made out of lavender lace, with straps but also the soft fabric going off your shoulders. It was short, about knee length, and an a-line skirt. You looked beautiful, you had to admit. You didn’t like to be prideful, but this was really Iris’s doing

“And what did we do to deserve such a treat?” Will said, drinking his whiskey on ice in the parlor as you served the appetizer and muse-brouche. His eyes scanned over your body hungrily, and you had a feeling you’d be blessed with his mouth tonight.

You smile up at him, then try to catch the gaze of your other husbands. Francisco’s eyes averted to the floor, and Pope’s were icy cold. When you’d knocked on his door, excited and grinning to tell him you had cooked a feast for them all, he was unimpressed. Francisco was in his room, and you felt like you interrupted something, saying they’d be down in a few.

“Just wanted to show my appreciation for having such wonderful husbands.” You go on your tippytoes to kiss Will’s cheek Out of the corner of your eye, Iris passes Ben and you see her quickly turn around, and Will snaps.

“Ben!”

Ben flips his brother off. You don’t know what he did.

During the meal, the rest of the courses are served by Iris and Reynash. You haven't quite figured out Reyansh’s role here. He seemed to do a little bit of everything, lower level security that filled a variety of roles. Or maybe he was just around Iris a lot and she put him to work, you didn’t know.

Will and Benny complimented you, Benny wrapping you up in his arms and kissing you deeply as he told you how delicious it was.

You even get a small smile and thank you from Francisco, which is more than you got most days, and he let out a quiet mm eating the soup. It was a good sign, but it wasn’t what you wanted. You wanted him to love you, you wanted him to adore you the way you adored him.

You wanted Pope to look at you with anything but disappointment.

“Do you like the desert, Pope?”

He didn’t look up. You’d picked this out just for them, knowing how much he liked chocolate, and Iris said Raspberries were Francisco’s favorite fruit.

“Did Iris make this?” He said, poking at the half-eaten cake.

“N-no, I made…”

“Hm.” Pope stood up, setting down his napkin. “I can tell.”

He pulled at Francisco's collar and Francosco followed after him. Ben took the rest of their cake.

“God fuck’n DAMN!” The youngest man shouted with a mouthful of chocolate. “Baby I’m gonna fuck you so good for this.”

Will took your hand. “We love the food, princess.” He kissed you tender. “Thank you so much for taking care of us.”

“It’s…” You stare off at the wall, your heart breaking in pieces but trying not to show it. You didn’t want to seem ungrateful for what you were given by your two loves… but you needed them all. You were incomplete without them. “It’s my honor to take care of my husbands…” You say quietly.

He sighed, taking your chin in his hands and lifting them up to his blue eyes. “Madonna, look at me.” You do. “Pope is… he’s complicated. His moods come and go, it’s not personal.”

“But… I think it is… because Francisco doesn’t like me either…” You hate how weak your voice sounds. You want to be strong, you want to be the goddess you are but you aren’t sure how.

Ben’s mouth is full as he talks. “Frank don’t know a pretty girl if she slapped him, don’t worry about him.”

But you did, you did worry about both of them. You worried they wouldn’t love you the way you loved them.

You spent the night with Will and Ben. On your hands and knees you pleasured Ben with your mouth with Will stuffing himself in your cunt, both brothers showering you in praise and love. Will was unbothered by the blood it seemed, nor by the way your body was bloated with your period. They must have known how badly you needed reassurance, because after Ben pulled out of your mouth to cum inside your hole lubed up with his brother’s cum, they took care of you. Will cleaned you up and placed underwear with a fresh pad under you while Ben laid your head on his lap, caressing your hair until you fell asleep.

Or pretended to. You heard their conversation as they left you in your bed.

“You gotta take it easier on her, Ben”

“What was that if not easy. She literally fell asleep on my lap, that was romantic as fuck.”

“Not today, today was fine, I mean in general and you have got to stop with-”

“Shh!”

“Well if it’s supposed to be a secret maybe stop pinching her ass in public!”

“Oh for-” Your eyes open just slightly, you watch Ben drag Will out of your room. They continue arguing outside your door but you can’t hear them.

You don’t sleep that night. Terror of the night before consuming you, fear of the demon or the nightmare or whatever it was an anxiety that your husbands didn’t love you anymore. Pope you could understand. You’d disappointed him, you’d mess up… But Francisco never wanted you, you can see that now. Were you that attractive? Unpleasant? He was clairvoyant, could he see into your heart that you weren’t worthy?

You felt another panic attack coming. Fear was surrounding you and the dark room didn’t help matters. You needed something, you needed someone’s reassurance but you couldn’t go to Ben and Will, afraid of what they’d say. Did you not trust them enough?

Jonah’s voice in your head. ‘if you ever need anything, anyone cause you problems you come to me, alright?’

Soon, you found yourself at Jonah’s door in his quarters, knocking. You were barefoot and in our nightgown, but it was the least of your worries. You needed help, and you trusted him.

When he opened the door, his loose sleep shirt unbuttoned to reveal his chest and light sweats on the bottom half, his eyes were wide.. “What are you doing here?!” He whispers, looking down both sides of the hall and yanking you inside his room.

It was simple, but clean for the most part. There was a pair of boxers on the floor and a bottle of whiskey vodka opened on the bedside table.

“Hey!” He whisper-shouted, not looking pleased. “What the hell are you doing here?” He repeats a little harsher this time.

You blink. “I… you said if I needed something to come to you?”

“I-” He sighs, softening a little but still looking irritated. Or angry. You couldn't tell which. “Yes, yes I did, but honey it’s 2 AM, is this an emergency?”

Your lips quiver, eyes filling with tears. “Francisco doesn’t love me.”

He looked more confused than before. “Huh?”

You begin sobbing loudly. “Francisco doesn’t love me! And I messed up with Pope and now he’s mad but I, I can fix that but it’s Francisco! He doesn’t want me here! He doesn’t want me to be his wife-”

Your mouth is suddenly covered “SHHHHH!!!” The back of your head is thrust against the wall and you’re suddenly scared and confused. Jonah pinches his brows together, eyes closed. “Hon, that’s not- this isn’t an emergency” His body was pressed up against yours, and as soon as he realized it, he moved back but his hand on your face. It’s large, and you think it could cover your whole face.

You tried to tell him it was to you, that this is your life, your future, but your mouth was covered by his rough, calloused hand and his dark brown eyes so close to yours. You could feel his breath on your face. He’d been drinking.

He mutters a few swears, lets go of your mouth before running fingers through his graying hair. More swears.

“C’mon, let’s go.” He took your hand and cracked the door open, checking the hall again before pulling you out and dragging you several doors down the corridor, his loose shirt fluttering.

Iris opened the door to his knocks, and as soon as she saw you crying she ripped your hand out of Jonah’s and pulled you behind her. “What did you do!” She hissed quietly.

Jonah raised his hands in defense. “Nothing! She showed up-”

“Why is she wearing lingerie!”

He smacked his head. “It’s not like that, Iris! I didn’t touch her! She showed her here panicking about those assholes but you need to get her back to her room!”

You couldn’t see Iris’s face, but you got the feeling she didn’t believe him. “He’s telling the truth.” You whimpered through your tears. “I came to him,” Iris turned to you. “Because I was having a panic attack, but he didn’t touch me…” You didn’t tell her the close proximity he was his, his mouth on your face. You didn’t think it happened for the reason Iris thought it did.

She held onto your hand, pausing, then spoke. “Go.”

Jonah looked at you once more, guilt on his face before he nodded, telling her to talk to him when she got back.

Iris took you back to your room, turning on the light and facing you. “You cannot be alone with Jonah like that, do you understand me?”

You weren’t sure why she was so aggressive. Jonah was no danger to you. “He didn’t-”

“I don’t care what he didn’t do this time, but you need to listen to me, you are dangerous fucking territory, and you need to watch your back every fucking step before you or someone else ends up dead, got it? Don’t be stupid.”

She slammed the door behind her.

You only slept when you cried out all your energy.

WELL WELL WELL I gave some Jonah description for you horny Jonah girlies....

BUT ALSO! Jonah lore??? Why did Iris freak out?

LEMME KNOW THOUGHTS OR THOTS

Short chapter, not super eventful or spicy, but next chapter RAMPS UP THE SPICE

If you havnt seen, i've put out two bonus content

1 is FishBen, adding context to their relationship.

2. is the tik tok trend asking your boyfriend to peel your orange

if you have ideas for bonus content or any questions, DROP BY THE ASK BOX!!

Love interaction <3 I know we preach reblogs here but if you arent comfortable with reblogging dark content or even commenting, please consider dropping by the ask to show your engagement, I allow anons!

LOVE YOU ALL!

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If I forgot someone or you'd like to be added/removed LMK!

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ravennaortiz · 3 months ago

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August 2nd is Juice with the prompt "There is a reason I don't celebrate my birthday". Requested by a lovely Anon. As always my stories are 18+

I thought she would like this thought Juice to himself as he collapsed onto the floor outside of your bedroom door. He knew it was unlocked but had decided against going in. You had not responded to his knocks or request to enter. He knew from the way your eyes had shown with tears and your lip had trembled when you entered the house that you were upset.

For the life of him he wasn't sure why though. He had surprised you before with trips and gifts. He figured a house full of friends for your birthday would be greeted with joy and happiness. He had spent weeks planning the perfect day for you. Everything from breakfast in bed to a day out on the water surfing to a surprise party once you got home.

Streamers and balloons of your favorite colors decorated the whole of the house. Your favorite foods, drinks and birthday cake had been made to perfection. He had been sure of it. You deserved to have the best day ever but yet somehow he had fucked it up.

"Aye Juicy boy. Ye want us to clear out?" inquired Chibs quietly as he entered the hallway a few minutes later. Juice sighed as he looked up. "I don't know. Probably. I'm not sure anymore. We were having such a good day.....I don't know what happened" admitted Juice as he rubbed his face with his hands.

Before anything else could be said the door opened and he fell in at your feet. "Could we talk" you murmured as you sniffled. Your eyes red and puffy and your makeup running down your face. Juices heart broke as he looked up at you but nodded as he sat up when you crouched down to sit next to him.

"I will give you two a few minutes" stated Chibs before heading back the way he had came.

"Tell me what I did wrong babe" murmured Juice as he grabbed your hands as he watched you closely. "Nothing. It's silly. I'm an adult and should be over it" you started as you shook your head and sighed. "I'm sure its not silly. Talk to me" encouraged Juice. "There is a reason I don't celebrate my birthday. Well lots of reasons honestly. This is my fault for never bringing it up. I usually just get the guy to break up with me before my birthday so it's never been an issue before" you rambled as you looked anywhere but at the man you had grown to love over the last ten months.

Juice frowned but waited patiently for you to speak again. "So you know how I don't speak to my family anymore?" you asked looking down at your hands. Juice nodded. It was something you had mentioned on one of your earlier dates. The two of you had bonded over your unique family situations. You had been no contact with yours since you turned eighteen.

"My parents and sister made it clear I was not wanted. They called me a mistake and I was left more often than not to fend for myself. My birthday was always treated as a day to tease, belittle and physically hurt me on occasion. Some years they would trick me into thinking things would change but they never did. My sister always got to use my birthday as her half birthday. So while I was being hit, starved and locked in a cage in the basement. My sister was getting presents, cakes and pony rides." you explained keeping your eyes down as tears started to fall again.

Juice could feel his temper started to flare at your words but kept it contained. He would do some looking into your family. They would pay. Right now he needed to reassure you that would never happen. "I'm sorry that happened to you. I promise my only intent today was to shower you with love and show you how special you are not only to me but to others" started Juice as he lifted your chin up gently. "I'm sorry that you were reminded of your past. I promise you that will never happen again as long as I breathe" he added as he wiped your tears with his thumb.

"Wait here. I'm going to have everyone head out and then I'll draw you a bath okay?" offered Juice as he started to stand. "Actually.....I...I would like...to try having a birthday party. If that is okay" you stammered as you laughed nervously at the silliness of it all. "Of course. I'll let everyone know you will be back out in a bit" stated Juice with a grin as he helped you up and gave you a kiss before heading down the hall.

Return to Masterlist

#ravennasmasterlist #juice ortiz #ravennasbirthdaybingo #sons of anarchy #soa fanfiction #juice ortiz x reader #juice fanfic #juice fanfiction #juice imagines #juice imagine #imagine juice #juice ortiz fanfic #juice ortiz fanfiction #juice ortiz fic #juice ortiz imagines #juice ortiz imagine

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lullaebies · 9 months ago

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Absolutely love your blog! If you're still taking Jaehaera/Aegon III requests what about one where they're in a secret relationship and are keeping it from their families but some shenanigans ensue (maybe they snuck out or something, or someone walked in on them kissing?) and they're somehow discovered? Also please overprotective father Aegon II because yes!

(Preferably an AU where the Dance happens later?)

The gathering in the room feels like a court of thorns, and Jaehaera feels as if she is going to hurl. Standing by her family with her grandmother looking at all around with hawk eyes, she feels if something is about to implode. Aegon had been taken from her side to his mother’s, Princess Rhaenyra. The heiress to the Throne had been most wroth, her, her husband, and her sons waking in the middle of the night for this… issue.

The worst of it all, Jaehaerys had been still laughing with damn near tears in his eyes while telling what he witnessed. She had begged him to leave it be, but then he and Aegon got into an altercation, and now… Ugh!

“So I enter her room because I left my book there—” he looks at Princess Rhaenyra and her family, particularly Aegon. “It was my room once too, do mind— and what do I see if not Aegon the Younger pining my sister against her own closet? The closet, grandmother. He didn’t have the mind to get her against a bed.”

She’s going to choke him.

“Oh, fuck off,” Aegon yells at her twin. “As if she hasn’t told me about you becoming a damn near Rosby stableboy in your visits there—”

Princess Rhaenyra pushes him back to his half-brothers, the lot of the brown haired boys holding their brother of nine and ten, yet only his father manages to stare him down. On the other hand, her father had been gritting his teeth beside her, while mother held onto Jaehaerys’s forearm in warning. Alicent gives her twin a pointed look.

“Mind your words, Jaehaerys,” she says, and turns to look at Rhaenyra and her family. “Prince Aegon, would you mind explaining how you came into my granddaughter's rooms?”

Aegon licks his lips, and Jaehaera swallows. The story is longer than both of them would be able to admit. Despite the blood feud of the families, they had managed to talk last year at the ball for her and Jaehaerys five and tenth nameday. Even went on a joint ride with Morghul and Stormcloud, and before he left for Dragonstone, they decided on a day to meet again at the Kingswood. Such meetings repeated. They could only afford a day a moon, but those days were all so sweet. Did she do anything wrong? Yes, had been the objective answer, but she couldn’t care for it.

And here he is, in her very own home. They could hardly speak by their family, how could she not ask for a moment of privacy?

Rhaenyra rubs her temples. “Things like these happen at this age, Alicent,” she says. “You are stressing Jaehaera and Aegon both.”

Alicent furrows her brows. “Oh, these things do happen at this age, don’t they?” she asks, glaring. “We had known since we were her age how reputation matters in finding marriage. Your son is three years her elder and should know not to fiddle with a noble girl’s corset strings at the hour of the bat.”

Jaehaera feels some tears well up in her eyes. She doesn’t care for the embarrassment of being caught by now, but this makes her feel a fool. It had been nothing insidious, was it? They hadn’t even kissed until they celebrated the new year. She hadn’t lost her chastity, either. It is not just…

“He came into those rooms because your granddaughter let him in, Queen Alicent,” Prince Daemon says. “You should mind her doings before you lay judgement on my son’s.”

Jaehaera’s father had been standing quiet for the longest while, but with that he flares. “Men had been sent to the wall and got castrated for less, Uncle. If you don’t like my mother’s judgement, perhaps I should see to it?”

She holds onto her father’s arm. Please, let this stop.

Daemon eyes him dangerously. “See to your own misgivings,” he says. “Your own son laughs at your daughter's.”

“Father, please,” Jaehaera says, when Aegon the Elder tries and almost manages to escape her grip. Her mother and brother come quickly beside them. Her mother stands in front of her father and puts a hand on his chest, warning, while Jaehaerys comes to Jaehaera’s side, a wroth smirk thrown at their grand-uncle’s way.

“I am laughing at my sister’s choices, grand uncle. At least if it had been Viserys, he has my aunt’s pretty face,” he says, backing their father for once. They often argue, but at times they work together, they prove they’re made of the same cloth. “The Seven had laughed at Aegon giving him yours.”

Daemon starts stepping towards them. “You think you are a jester, you defected—”

Prince Jacaerys comes against his step-father to stop him from coming forward, the same ways her mother has to stop her father from doing the same. Her grandmother and Princess Rhaenyra had come to yell at one another, and even the kingsguard had come to get involved. Jaehaera’s body is reduced to shaking, fat tears fully sliding down her cheek.

“I’m sorry,” she says quietly between gentle sobs, the sleeves of a dishevelled dress wiping against her face again and again to try and catch all the tears. Only the family beside her hears, so loud were the voices in the room. Her brother and father turn around, with similarly apprehensive faces. “Please, please stop..”

Behind them, from the other side of the room, Aegon sees her in her pathetic state too. She never was the emotional type, and she had oft hoped he liked it for he had been none too different. The unusual petrification on his face makes her blood feel as if it is running dry, and it feels all gone when the dark amethyst of his eyes fall into what she could only call resigned acceptance.

Aegon, her Aegon, comes by his mother and her grandmother, holding Princess Rhaenyra’s arm. “It was my fault. We didn’t mean to… I took it too far,” he finally says. “I won’t come by her any more, Queen Alicent.”

It hurts more than anything else he could’ve said.

Her mother pushes their father aside to cloak her in an embrace. Jaehaera can only tremble and sob against her mother’s robe.

The room grows silent as Princess Rhaenyra and Queen Alicent agree to not tell The King or all else of the incident; so ill had been King Viserys, it had not been worth ailing her grandfather further with this issue when he had been on the brink of passing.

All is to be forgotten, and cast away. Jaehaera’s puffy eyes lift from her mother’s shoulder, and catch his gaze one last time before he leaves. He tries to mouth something, but is pushed by his family out of the room.

Jaehaera sinks against her mother again. Even if she banishes the days in the green Kingswood from her thoughts, the scent of the campfire charring wood black will live in her dreams.

#and they completed the task they didn't manage that night in the middle of the war and brought peace 🙏 the end #i wish i could add more jaehaerys shittalking it was my favorite thing #i have one more request for jaehaera/aegon iii and then im focusing on exams and my longfic #jaehaegon #aegon iii targaryen x jaehaera targaryen #jaehaera targaryen x aegon iii targaryen #aegon iii targaryen #jaehaera targaryen #alicent hightower #prince jaehaerys targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #i would tag daemon and rhaenyra too but i don't think those who go their tag would care for this #hotd #hotd fanfic #my fics #my fanfics #reqs #answered #forwithinthishollowcrown

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