#“who's in these quote marks jay?” me i am

[cuminhoid]

not to whine but please leave more comments please please please it has been . a while since I've gotten a comment

[junnieverse]

HICKEY PRANK ➳ ENHYPEN

➙ pranking enhypen (part. 2)

pairing: enhypen x gn!reader

genre: crack, a little fluff

request: " hii i just read your enhypen prank wars hcs and sunghoon’s was so funny, how do u think the rest would react to a hickey prank???? "

warnings: lowercase intended, not proofread, heeseung's drabble is a little suggestive (just a teeny, tiny bit), reader accused/thought to be a cheater in hyung line's drabbles (jake ends up crying, my poor baby)

a/n: enjoy anon! sunghoon's was not included so you can find his in my original post [ here ]

🖇️ — 양정원 ; JUNGWON !

there was just something so fun about messing with jungwon and seeing him all flustered afterwards making him ten times cuter

after seeing a bunch of tiktoks trying this prank, you thought it would be a fun attempt to get a reaction out of him

you had been on a facetime with your boyfriend and purposely turning your neck to show the mark you quickly turn the camera as if nothing happened but ofcourse jungwon noticed and immediately ended the call to go over to your house

hearing aggressive knocks on your door, you open it to find a breathless jungwon who tried to catch his breath before he spoke up, "Y-your neck- what is that mark?"

he points at it and you laugh at how he came all the way here to ask about it, "It's the hickey you gave me wonnie." you playfully lie

with no response, jungwon just nervous laughs claiming this was obviously another one of your jokes but your serious face was telling him otherwise

"Wait but that can't be true... I don't even remember... doing that to you..." he shyly whispers the last part as his ears grow red and you can't help but resist the urge to squish him

"I'm just joking Wonnie, it's not real, see?" you admit wiping off the make up showing him the shades on your finger

"I- you really gaslit me-" he says baffled as you squeezed his cheeks laughing it off

🖇️ — 이희승 ; HEESEUNG !

heeseung was always messing with you and you wanted to get him back, sweet revenge

after his last prank with him rejecting your kisses, you thought the hickey prank your friend had suggested was perfect, nothing too crazy and harmless..?

you had planned to go to the basketball court around the area to shoot some hoops together but heeseung was not expecting for you to open the door and see a few suspicious marks on you

"Where did you get those hickies?" he immediately questions as his eyebrow raised

"Who else if not you obviously." you retort back pulling your shirt up a little

"It's either you're cheating on me... or that's fake, but because you are actually so down bad for me as I am for you, cheating is out of the question." heeseung tells you as he had it all figured out and there was no point in denying it

rolling your eyes, your boyfriend notices and chuckles, "I can't even prank you properly. How did you even know though?" you ask curiously as he wraps his hands around your waist

"You and I both know I have my favourite places to mark you babe, maybe if you payed attention to that detail I would've fell for it." he explains before winking as you were at a loss for words

🖇️ — 박종성 ; JAY !

"Jay, sweetie, I'm sorry, it was an awful prank... not like the hair dye one but still... you can't stay mad at me forever right..?" you beg as you clutch on jay's arm as he continues to ignore you

here you were trying to win your boyfriend over after a hickey prank gone wrong and he had completely iced you out for past hour

after the crazy dye and shampoo prank you pulled, your shenanigans were far from over, you simply turned them down because it was evident there was only so much jay could put up with before he sold you on amazon (as he quoted himself)

after catching sight of the little hickies on you, jay was quite evidently... losing his mind

he just couldn't believe it, you were seeing someone else... did you no longer love him

having finally admitted the truth that they were all fake make up looks, jay was unmoving... stunned to say the least (I'm talking "ah jinjja... ottoke" mix of emotions jay)

even after that he still didn't say anything and you were starting to think you broke your boyfriend

maybe it was time you ended your stunts, he had his members madness to deal with alone, his partner shouldn't cause him any more early grey hairs

🖇️ — 심재윤 ; JAKE !

jake was your dream partner, everything you wanted in a man, he could say the exact same thing about you, the perfect other half he needed... although these were one of the more small moments where he jokingly started wondering what he did to deserve all these heart attacks you cause him

although nothing could ever prepare jake for how much his heart dropped when he saw the hickies on your neck and collarbone, I mean those were the visible ones, who knew where else they were

he was very well aware that was not his 'artwork', he would've remembered and let you proudly show them off after all

"(Y/n)... do you not love me anymore baby, is there really someone else..?" he asks in disbelief trying to find sincerity in your eyes

upon seeing how your boyfriend's eyes were filling with tears, you knew it was time to end the charades

nobody liked seeing jake sad, especially you, that's when you realised maybe you took it a bit too far

"Jakey no don't cry babe, it was a prank, I would never do that to you." you hurriedly reassure him as you wiped the few tears that fell from his eyes

you boyfriend was pretty playful and would laugh along to your pranks but maybe this one wasn't the right way to go

🖇️ — 김선우 ; SUNOO !

having had a more than wonderful relationship with sunoo, one would never expect you to prank your unsuspecting boyfriend

let alone so heartlessly with a hickey prank which would probably make him extremely upset

but here you were watching a youtube tutorial on how to make a realistic hickey print and the little bruise like spot on your collarbone was... nothing perfect but you thought it was a good attempt for your first try

you had walked around with the fake love mark on you and the entire time your boyfriend had said nothing about it

approaching you with a make up wet wipe in hand, sunoo gives it to you, "Honey, you have some make up on your neck, what happened?'

with your jaw dropped you couldn't believe how miserably your prank went

"Oh c'mon, was it that bad, I wanted to do the hickey prank on you-" you tell him as your head drops and sunoo holds in his laugh

"Really? Wow your make up skills are bad then." he tells you helping you wipe the make up off your collarbone

🖇️ — 西村 力 ; NI-KI !

you and riki were still pranking each other and after the ps5 prank and having thought that would be the cherry on top, you thought your next one would surely end this war

you decided to prank your boyfriend by attempting to hide a fake hickey and getting his reaction

for the past afternoon you had been covering your neck which ofcourse riki had noticed because it did seem as though you were hiding something

"Why do you keep covering your neck when I'm around, are you hiding something?" he asks seeming skeptical as he raised a brow

"Oh it's nothing, my neck is just itchy... and bruised." you lie hoping he would buy it

"Wait bruised, lemme see." he says worriedly

before you could even try to stop him he pulled your hand off and his eyes widened at the fake hickey mark

"W-where did you get that... because it sure wasn't me-" he says frustrated almost close to tears

"It's fake! Yeah I got you, I win again!" you proudly yell as you do a little victory dance

riki couldn't take these heart attacks any longer and surrendered, you were officially the prank master

[coleskingdom]

Hall Pass

Jay White x Female Reader

NSFW Minors DNI 18+

@midwestmade29 @madhatterbri

You need these” Jay handing me his sunglasses even though we were just sitting down for lunch in catering. “What? Why?” my attention drawn elsewhere. “If you’re going to stare at golden boys ass like that, at least do it from behind the glasses.” there was no humor in his tone. Just then Mariah walked in Jay reached back for the glasses putting them on as his head slightly followed her across the room.

I roll my eyes dramatically at him “I’ve lost my appetite.” pushing back from the table. “Sit, Sweetheart. If I didn’t eat every time you stared at golden boy , I would’ve starved to death by now.” he growled only low of enough for me to hear. I glared at him, as I took a bite. “A lesser man would’ve left you for your disrespectful eye fucking of golden boy. I however am not a lesser man. In fact from what I hear a romp with him isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.” his wink and smirk had me wanting to stab him with my fork.

“ Why are you so ruffled? I saw that flash in your eyes. I’m a fair man, if you want a night of being pounded in to and being called Bruv, I’ll say yes, but you’ll have to say yes to me taking Mariah back to the hotel, but I know what I’m getting into. Those stardom girls are something different all together.”he made the chefs kiss motion. “I’m done here.” pushing back from the table and walking out of the room I heard his laugh as I left , Mariah taking a seat next to him as I glanced back.

“Ugh, I fucking hate him” slamming the door behind me entering into the Bullet Club Gold locker room. “ Who do you hate?” the unmistakable voice of Skye asked sitting up from the couch in the room. “What the fuck?”completely caught off guard staring at her. “ Hey now, Jay said I could lay down in here. He’s a real sweetheart. Seriously though, are you okay?” as she made room on the couch. “ No, yes, maybe. Jays the nod infuriating man I’ve ever met.” Sitting down “ But what did you do?” Nudging my shoulder playfully. “ Apparently I was staring at Wills ass.” she laughed “Its not funny. He then started staring at Mariah. Who the hell can compete with that and she just sat down with him as I left.” I put my head in my hands. “ It’s funny I got in the same situation twice with Kyle. Once for Will and once for Jay.” I looked at my jaw dropped .”Come on, look at him, he’s all abs and attitude. You know what you have. Don’t act shocked that I looked at him.” Smirking at me. “So why Will? Aside from his God like body. I get to say that because I’m sharing an apartment with him and Kyle. What is that keeps pulling your attention away?.” I hesitated “I’m your best friend just tell me.” Her hand taking mine. “ You’re right about abs and attitude with Jay. I don’t know he’s like that golden retriever puppy he’s just so fucking happy and nice. I’ll be fine and I’m gonna stop looking at Will. Jay thinks it’s all about that and I quote be pounded and called bruv. When it’s more like I want to have a burger and a laugh.” I sighed “ I trust Jay implicitly and I get why he did what he did, but he offered me a hall pass for Will if he could have one with her.” looking at my bestie “ Holy shit what did you say? Is Jay really okay with that ?Everyone knows he’s batshit crazy over you.” I got up and began to pace “ I didn’t say anything what the hell could I say, I was pissed and hurt that he’d actually say that. Maybe he’s tired of me, maybe it’s closer to being over than it is for forever. Fuck if I know. I’ve got to get out of here before he comes in here.” moving toward my bag. “Want my opinion I think you are handling too much of his shit? But I’m gonna say this because I love all three of you. Don’t take the hall pass and don’t give him one either. Will’s not for you, but if you want that burger and a laugh come out with me and Kyle, Will, and Mark I can make that happen.” She stood and hugged me. “I’m gonna head out I think you and Jay have some shit to talk about.” she left just as I was debating about following her.

“Sweetheart where are you headed?” Jay’s mocking tone filling the room as he and Skye passed each other. “ None of your fucking business.” walking towards him. “ Tsk tsk you know our rule we don’t leave each other mad. Besides the best part of fighting is the fucking afterwards.” he stalked me till my back was up against the wall. “ So are we done fighting?” his hand tracing my face the other one finding my hip.

“ Mariah not available?” I seethe but my body craves his touch. “You’d look so pretty wearing my hand as a necklace “ his fingers tracing the side of my neck his thumb pressing lightly causing me to gasp. “Sweetheart, there’s no one, that I want or need more than you.” his kiss sure and deep, his hand keeping my focus only on him. “ Keep looking at me like you want to fuck me but you also want to kill me." His hands thread in my hair, as he continues to kiss me. His hips move and he growls a bit of delight in the back of his throat. His hand pulls my hair harder, and it's like I'm completely swallowed by him.

I fall into that kiss, tumbling deep into this moment, forgetting about everything.

His fingers keep dip below my waistband stroking my pussy over my panties, the other hand gripping my ass. His hard body pins me against the wall and I wrap my arms around his neck, going insane with bliss. "You're fucking soaked," Jay’s voice amused. “You're touching me of course I am.” His mouth buries mine, hungry now, and his fingers slip underneath and tease up and down my slit. I'm moaning into his tongue and I don't care anymore as his fingers slide inside of me, fucking me nice and deep. Oh my god, he presses against that spot inside me . My knees go limp and he's supporting my weight as his fingers stroke in and out, hitting the spot over and over. My eyes roll back, l'm moaning, mindless, insane with pleasure, and he's not stopping.

He bites my lower lip and whispers, "Come for me, sweetheart, come on, you need it, don't you?"

"Yes," | gasp, shaking as I shatter on his hand. I come in a sudden rush, my fingers digging into his back, my cheeks tingling. "Good girl”he whispers my head resting on his shoulder.

“Jay, I’m…” his finger on my lips silenced me. “ I took it to far I’m sorry.” kissing my forehead. “Just the idea of you..” I put my finger on his lips this time.

[sunflowerandstrawberryspice]

Ninjago characters as things me and my friends have genuinely said pt. 2 (+Old lady from PT)

Misako *seeing a problem arising*: Seems like a personal problem

Lloyd When people say ace people aren't real: welp if I'm not real then I guess I'm a dragon

Zane/Pixal: sometimes I forget where I put my limbs

Kai: Wallpaper is outdated

Jay: I vitamin C death

Garmadon: I have to do a séance every time I want to get y'all attention!

Cole: If you like F so much name every F word, fuck, fox, uh... pharaoh

*continuation of previous conversation* Cole: Finland Jay: Fruit Kai: Fruit-y Cole: Oh like me!

Nya: Can you be 5'12... fuck that 6'0

Zane: Height is a competition and I am winning

Misako: I used to be homophobic and that's probably why god took my knee caps

Lloyd: See they can't mark me absent because in reality they just have hostage situation

Nya: Gold fish make it so that I want to die a little less

Kai: YOU'RE FUCKING COLOR BLIND Cole: SAYS THE ONE WHO SAID SUNSETS WERE MONCHROME

Jay: I'm gonna shimmy shimmy doo bop off a clif

Zane: It's about time for me to detach my knees

Pretty much all the ninja @ this point: My pain might be chronic but this ass is iconic

Zane @ literally everyone: DON'T EAT FOOD OFF THE FLOOR WE''VE BEEN OVER THIS

Lloyd: My biggest accomplishment is NOT being a leash child Cole: That's cause we didn't know where to buy one

Pixal: I'm very sexy I mean look at me fix the wifi box

Cole/Zane *after dying/getting very hurt AGAIN*: I may or may not have haha funnied a little too hard

Lords have mercy I love making these and getting an excuse to scroll through my quotes book. Anyway I was planning on having Zane's vouge cover out tonight then my chronic pain kicked in right alongside a headache and that threw out all plans for doing anything that takes anymore than minimal effort. So instead you get more haha funnies. Hope y'all enjoyed, peace!

[spritehouse]

have you ever read the olden compass? or watched the show? If you have (and I would recommend you do) what do you thing the bau’s demons would be (if you haven’t but you still want to answer this you can just look it up) I have a few ideas but I’m not completely sure

I think Morgan’s would be a German Shepard and Reid’s would be an oriental longhair. And I know Gideon would be some sort of bird but I’m not sure about the rest of them

I would love your thoughts on it!

i haven't read/watched it, but i have read fics about it and i love them! a particular favorite of mine is the series "his dark mind" by deejaymill which destroyed me in the best way possible.

i got so invested in the series that a lot of my hcs/ideas come from there, but here are my thoughts:

derek - pitbull(?) i don't know a lot about dogs, but derek's dæmon would absolutely be a dog.

pitbull might be a bit basic, but yk, looks tough and intimidating but actually a softie. i think it fits.

spencer - hare this is absolutely from the series i mentioned before because i love spencer and his hare dæmon sm, but it also fits so well.

alternatively, (and this is 100% me self-projecting) i think a type of cat or crow would fit too—intelligent, talkative, a little skittish, cunning, and loves shiny things :]

emily - cat not just because of sergio, but emily is 100% a cat, probably a black one too. i think a black cat would fit her so well and she and spencer would make great cat dæmon buds

jj - butterfly also from the series. just assume all of these come from there at this point but i digress.

partially because she collected butterflies as a kid, but also bright, charming, and deceptively delicate. or maybe a frog for similar reasons.

tbh, i haven't studied jj's character a lot simply because i'm not very good at writing her

hotch - wolf(?) i think hotch would have a canine dæmon (loyal, protective, smart, etc) but i also don't think he'd have a dog.

(the rest of hotch's explanation talks about child abuse in reference to hotch's implied backstory. the end of this section will be marked with *** if you skip)

anyways idk if this is canon or just from the fics i've read, but i saw somewhere that children who suffer from abuse before their dæmons settle often end up with large predators (or tiny prey). my personal hc for hotch/hotch's father was that he was forced to be strong and masculine, so his dæmon settled on a form that would fulfill those expectations to avoid further trouble.

***

also hotch would look really cool with a grey wolf.

penelope - blue jay penelope would absolutely have a corvid. small and very unscientific infodump: part of the classification for corvids is advanced throat. muscles to make more complex sounds. corvids are also the most intelligent birds researchers have studied to date (im getting my information from wikipedia and my brain so don't quote me on this). add in the blue jay's bright color and you have pg!

elle - fox alternatively: ferret, stout, or weasel

intelligent, cunning, proud, and a little tricky. i don't have an in-depth explanation for this, i just think it fits.

luke - shepard i'm so biased with roxy, but i do think it fits. loyal, intelligent, and protective. i've love to do a huge luke analysis about this but i really have nothing else to say. he's a shepard.

gideon - owl full honesty, i didn't put a lot of thought into this. i was kinda just like "yeah that vibes"

owls are stereotypically old and wise

rossi - hawk again, i really didn't put too much thought into this, just thought it fit the vibes

alex - serval this is self-projection and also not very thoughtful (i am in class as im typing this and maybe should be paying attention but the vibes).

servals are very intelligent felines and love puzzles. i was going to look into a large cat species that's very maternal (though serval mothers do care and hunt for their young alone and are very independent mothers) but again, im in class so this is what we're going with.

i didn't do kate, seaver, matt, or stephen, just because i feel like i dont know them well enough, but here are my unthought-out opinions:

kate: lion/lioness (ik dæmons are usually of the opposite gender of their humans, but i feel like she'd just. Have a Lioness.)

seaver: fox

idk the other two but i'd love to know what you think!

edit: i just realized i forgot to acknowledge your thoughts, i got very excited about my opinions, but i also agree with those! derek's as a german shepard (from my limited knowledge about shepards) makes a lot of sense for the same reason i think luke is and also spencer is such a feline guy idk how to explain it, he just Is.

[la-pheacienne]

What is the most romantic story you have ever read or watched?

This one will be long, sorry, I can't just pick one. I looked for the definition of "romantic" in various dictionnaries and I singled out these definitions (excluding the Romanticism of the 19th century although the two can coexist obviously) :

"marked by the imaginative or emotional appeal of what is heroic, adventurous, remote, mysterious, or idealized"

"characterized by, or suggestive of an idealized view of reality"

"visionary"

"conducive to or characterized by the expression of love"

"exciting and mysterious and having a strong effect on your emotions"

So the main things to look for here are 1) idealism (as opposed to realism) and 2) strong emotions, which leads to 3) love, that is naturally the perfect form of idealism evoking strong emotions.

Most romantic stories I have ever read, in no particular order:

A Tale of Two Cities. "I wish you to know that you have been the last dream of my soul". A man sacrificing himself for the woman he loves, taking the place of the man she loves in the guillotine, you can't get more romantic than that.

Les Miserables. It is a Romantic story and a romantic story, both, of course. It is in every way THE romantic story by definition, every single possible version of romantic love is present here. Marius and Cosette's love at first sight is the definition of idealistic love as a copying mechanism for misery, loneliness and abandon. "What Is Love? I have met in the streets a very poor young man who was in love. His hat was old, his coat worn, the water passed through his shoes and the stars through his soul". Eponine's love and sacrifice for Marius and Cosette's happiness is the purest form of selfless devotion, born out of a context of complete vileness and depravity. Grantaire sacrificing himself for the ideals that Enjorlas believes in, out of pure love and devotion for Enjorlas as a person and not because of his personal political ideology, is also purely romantic. I would even include Valjean's love for the Bishop Myriel here because it is just so idealistic and wholesome and heartbreaking and life changing and larger than life.

The Great Gatsby. The romantic element is one sided here. It is personnified in Jay Gatsby, whose fatal love for the unworthy Daisy is the essence of "romantic", it is purely idealistic and thus completely clashes with the harsh reality, but we can't help but be drawn to his utter devotion, emotional drive and integrity. That's why he's The Great. "They're a rotten crowd. You're worth the whole damn bunch put together". "Can’t repeat the past?…Why of course you can!"

After these three I have to mention:

Wuthering Heights, for the dark side of romantic love. Here love is mainly the force of evil, but still, it is presented in its most idealistic form. "He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same". "Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I can not live without my life! I can not live without my soul".

Jane Eyre. "I have for the first time found what I can truly love–I have found you. You are my sympathy–my better self–my good angel–I am bound to you with a strong attachment. I think you good, gifted, lovely: a fervent, a solemn passion is conceived in my heart; it leans to you, draws you to my centre and spring of life, wrap my existence about you–and, kindling in pure, powerful flame, fuses you and me in one". I mean. Self explanatory.

Pride and Prejudice. Not exactly my definition of romantic because the realism is strong on that one, but still, it is the OG story where two people change their very personality because of their love for each other and it merits a place here. And also for quotes like this "In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you".

Gone with the Wind is also pretty romantic imo, despite the strong realism of both Scarlett and Rhett. Well, it merits a place here because this book really cemented the trope of a fictional character that is morally ambiguous (rotten even) and very realistic in the raw sense of the word but at the same time has an intense, soul-crushing idealism. Both Scarlett and Rhett are big idealists and they have an inner conflict between that idealism and their natural tendency to focus on the here and now. I love that. Very popular trope in American fiction.

As for the most romantic stories I have watched, that should be a post on its own I think because I can think of plenty of movies/shows, if we don't count the adaptations of the books I just mentioned here.

[gethooked]

Here's my thoughts from tonight's dynamite

Hook vs Samoa Joe main event, ok I'm totally not nervous at all. This video package feels like it's a ppv. Ok but Hook's voice 😍 he needs to talk more. His slow walk oml.

Christian Cage vs Dustin Rhodes where did this match come from. I hate how Christian walks and I don't know why. Nick Wayne though 😍. Dustin's theme reminds of his Goldust theme. I honestly think Christian is going to win. Christian got yeeted over those steps oml. I feel like Dustin has been wrestling for 100 years, but I might actually cry when he retires. Hopefully he has a match for his retirement match. Not Nick trying to cheat. Yes Dustin, yambag jones, yambag city like Taz said. Dustin beat Nick's ass. Yess, get Nick out of here. (I love you Nick) Christian taking Adam's move 🫨 what did I say Christian was gonna win.

Who's house? Swerve's house! The way Swerve laughs is so weird to me. Renee looks sooooo pretty tonight. Did Swerve quote Harry Styles or am I going insane. Swerve's house!

Just looking at S🤮mmy passes me off. From what I've heard about Jericho recently I don't like him. A pizza cutter? Maybe he will cut your hair. Sydallllll!!!! Sydal beat Jericho before? Never knew that. At least we get to see Sydal.

Orange Cassidy and Trent with Chuck say whatttt... since when was he back. Hopefully OC and Trent win. Oh wait Penta and Komander... this match is gonna be a banger. Trust me I know bangers. Cero Miedo! I love that Rey's back too. Classic OC. I think my dogs like wrestling because whenever wrestling is on they have to wrestle to. They even do their own promos. Ok sorry back to the actual match. I hate picture in picture I get distracted by the commercials. So far I've been right about the winnings for 2 matches. Let's see how many more I can get. Bruh the undisputed kingdom can suck a fat one. Roddy shut the fuck up. Why are YOU trying to tell him what to do. Belongs to you? Bitch what? I agree with the other fans. OC another match?

Hangman you look different, did you dye your hair? Grow a mustache? Again Renee is sooo pretty. He doesn't think about Swerve? Yeah right. Hangman never threaten HOOK like that again.

This might make me cry. Rip Jay. Rest in Heaven. Poor Mark, he already looks emotional. #DemBoys period girl!! Good for you! The love Mark has for his niece is so cute. Now I'm gonna cry for real. The fact that Jay was a family man breaks my heart.

The bucks? What the hell happened to their faces. Nicholas and Matthew is crazyyyyy. Hypothetical he's using that word to much fr. Stiiiiiiiinnnnngggggggg. #changetheworld the shade towards cm punk is my favorite thing. Sweetheart is crazy.

Bullet club gold. Honestly I only like Jay. Mogul embassy? This match is gonna go crazy. I loveee Prince Nana. I think Toa missed. BCG won, knew that was gonna happen. We love Bowens btw. Scissor me Daddy Ass.

Wardlow? Adam Cole? Get off my screen sellouts.

Toni on commentary? Oml i love her but her gimmick gets irritating after awhile in my opinion. Deonna vs Anna? Deonna has to win. If I see anyone make comments about Deonna I will personally beat you the fuck up. What does virtuosa even mean? Yes Deonna as you should. Toni's faces are sooo funny bro. Poor Luther. Right in the what? Poor Taz. They must have been watching a telenovela. (I'm mexican I can make that joke)

Top Flight vs Private Party? I want Top Flight to win, butttt I think PP is going to win since Marq Quen is back. Idk I just hope both teams have fun. I loveeee PP's theme. Aww he gave away his durag. Same thing with TF's theme. I've been loving Darius' hair braided. What did Taz call them? I love when Zay does that little scream. Wasn't Darius on the ropes? Andretti? We love him too.

Hook vs Joe? Bae's gotta win this. Come on Hook. Hook looks so majestic. I'm gonna cry my poor Hookie. Joe you didn't have to actually have to kill him.

[briankeene]

Another Toothpick

Grief is a weird beast, and every time you think you’ve got a hold of it, the damn thing slips your grasp, all snarling and drooling. Last year, somewhere between the deaths of Dave Thomas and Jay Wilburn, I noticed a marked change in how I processed and dealt with loss. Namely, I shut down and compartmentalize and treat the passing of friends like I would a novel I have to write or a garden I have to tend or any of the other activities that fill my daily life. I approached those deaths with a checklist: “What do I need to do to help?” In Jay’s case, that was fairly easy, since Armand Rosamilia is overseeing his literary estate. In Dave’s case, I shouldered the workload, and though I grumble and complain about that workload from time to time, the truth is, I am happy to take it on, because I view it as something healthy to do. Trust me when I tell you, this is a far more preferable method to dealing with grief than the suicidal tendencies I felt after J. F. Gonzalez’s passing, or the abject numbness I felt after Tom Piccirilli followed him.

The Sopranos is my favorite television show of all time. This is no secret. I’ve got a poster signed by James Gandolfini, can quote every line of dialogue from all 6 seasons, and intimately understood the ending the night it aired. My dream convention panel is for somebody to allow me to talk for an hour about how The Sopranos is a frighteningly apt documentary about horror fiction in the late 1990s and early 2000s — just replace mob with writing and publishing. My least favorite character — the one I loathe above all others — is Janice. And one of the reasons I loathed her was her reaction in season 3, episode 5, titled ‘Another Toothpick’. When Tony reveals to Janice that Bobby’s old man is dying of lung cancer, she casually replies, “Another toothpick.” When Tony becomes rightly incensed by this horrendously misplaced metaphor until Janice points out to him that it was their mother who coined the phrase, in regards to terminally ill people. After watching The Many Saints of Newark, it’s pretty clear that Livia and Janice both —m despite all their faults — were probably living with lifelong PTSD, as was Tony. With that in mind, the term can be forgiven and is somewhat understandable. It’s a coping mechanism — a way of battening down the emotional hatches for people who simply can’t take much more.

This evening we found out that my dear friend Lee D. Miller has a month or so to live. Cancer — severe and sudden. He and I served together in the Navy many, many years ago. Of the guys I served with, only six of our main crew are left now. A few of us are flying to Texas to be at his bedside next Friday. When his wife told us, I did not think “Another toothpick”. Nor did I wallow in numb apathy or careening suicidal thoughts. I did not jump into the fray and try to fix or take care of things. I did not do any of the things I’ve done over the last few years when it comes to grief.

Instead, I simply poured myself a drink, stepped outside, and listened to emergency sirens wail in the cool evening air. I consoled another friend who we served with. I looked at pictures of us all, barely out of high school and thrown into a world of unexpected shit all in the name of protecting this country — a country which seems to be coming apart at the seams.

I’m not sure I have the emotional capacity to properly grieve anymore. But I know that I will miss Lee, and I know that I love him. We traveled the world together — leaving a lawless, hilarious, sometimes bloody and always chaotic path across several continents and a host of time zones. We were both Joe R. Lansdale fans from early on. We (along with another friend) knew every line of every track on the Beastie Boys’ License to Ill, and we could alternate them, rapping in perfect time, much to the chagrin of everyone else we served with. I turned him on to Eric B and Rakim. He turned me on to Pixies and Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys. He was a peacenik serving during the Cold War, but he was also a ruthless fighter and if you fucked with him, you were fucked indeed. We once saw him order a sandwich in a restaurant and immediately take half of it out to a homeless person on the sidewalk. We once saw him piss in a guy’s boots because the guy had done something to cross him. And I still can’t talk about our time in Cuba and the smuggled iguana, or the time after we were all discharged that we crashed a random small town high school dance without breaking into simultaneous laughter and tears.

Or maybe that’s just the grief.

I know how to grieve. I’ve had practice.

Anyway, Lee, I know Genise said you’re still aware, so when you read this, you just hang on a little bit longer if you can. Me and Blum and Buige will land in Dallas on the 28th. We’ll bring a few Norfallos with us. Maybe a few Mickeys Big Mouths. You have to stick around for that. Love you, shipmate.

You aren’t just another toothpick.

[rmpmw]

The God Squad: Can we find God through Einstein?

By Rabbi Marc Gellman

June 7, 2013 1:45 PM PT

Q: Among all the questions you receive about the conflict between science and religion, you seem to take the accommodationist route, insisting there is no conflict and misquoting Albert Einstein in a way that makes him seem religious. How can you a) ignore direct conflicts between science and religion (age of the universe, first life on earth, etc.) and b) consistently distort Einstein’s pantheism and disbelief in a personal god? — N, via godsquadquestion

A: I’m quite fond of quoting Einstein to make the points that one can be smart and religious, and be a scientist and be religious. I usually choose the famous Einstein quote supposedly written in response to a letter from Gandhi that contained the query, “Dear Einstein: What do you do?” Einstein supposedly replied, “Dear Gandhi: I trace the lines that flow from God.”

I’ve also quoted Einstein’s supposed comment on the need for a Creator God in the universe: “How could so great a symphony as the universe have no conductor?” Or my absolute favorite possible Einstein quote: “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”

I love these comments, but I try to be an honest and honorable thinker, so I also usually add that I haven’t been able to totally confirm the accuracy of these famous Einstein quotes.

Recently, a letter that Einstein wrote a year before his death to philosopher Eric Gutkind was auctioned off in England. It casts a shadow, as does your probing question, over my enthusiastic but possibly misguided attempts to make Einstein a proof text for a universe created and sustained by God.

In that letter, he wrote: “The word God is for me nothing more than the expression and product of human weaknesses, the Bible a collection of honorable but still primitive legends which are nevertheless pretty childish.”

The letter proves that Einstein was not conventionally religious, but it doesn’t prove he was an atheist. In fact, Einstein was angered by assertions that he was an atheist. He said, “In view of such harmony in the cosmos, which I, with my limited human mind, am able to recognize, there are yet people who say there is no God. But what really makes me angry is that they quote me for the support of such views.”

In a 1940 essay on “Science and Religion” in the journal Nature, Einstein wrote: “Conflicts between science and religion have all sprung from fatal errors. Even though the realms of religion and science in themselves are clearly marked off from each other, there are strong reciprocal relationships and dependencies ... science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind ... a legitimate conflict between science and religion cannot exist.”

Following Einstein, Stephen Jay Gould, the late paleontologist, philosopher and evolutionary biologist, in a 1997 essay, called the domains of science and religion Nonoverlapping Magisteria (NOMA). Each has its own domain of human thought, and problems only arise when the natural boundaries of each discipline are breached — when science tries to refute religion or when religion tries to refute science.

There are many ways to the truth, just like there are many ways up a mountain. I think Gould was less religious than Einstein, although Einstein was certainly not conventionally religious.

The religious ideas I’ve taken from Einstein (and similarly Spinoza) into my own faith are first and foremost the religious idea of awe. From Psalm 19’s powerful spiritual insight — “The Heavens declare the glory of God” — to Einstein’s idea of cosmic harmony, there is the foundational belief (and it is a belief, not a fact) that where there is order, there must be an orderer.

This spiritual tenet is the foundation of all religious beliefs, but it is not the end of all religious beliefs. After the belief in the order of the universe, there is a belief in the moral order of the universe — Martin Luther King’s belief that the universe arcs toward freedom. It is the heroic and hopeful belief that despite the evidence of evil, goodness has an edge and has a stronger claim on our common future.

Einstein, Spinoza, Gould and you, dear reader, believe in the God of the philosophers as opposed to the God of the Bible. I believe that both are in truth the one true God who made heaven and earth and who made us “but little lower than the angels.”

As for our Einstein debate, John Brooke, emeritus professor of science and religion at the University of Oxford, said of Einstein: “He was rather quirky about religion.”

I could not have said it better ... or shorter!

(For more, you might want to read Max Jammer’s 1999 book, “Einstein and Religion: Physics and Theology.”)

(Send QUESTIONS ONLY to The God Squad via email at godsquadquestion@aol.com.)

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[silvermistcosmos]

▬▬ enhypen headcanon - when their s/o calls them bro/dude

PAIRING. enhypen x reader 

GENRE.  fluff, crack // headcanon

WARNINGS. mentions of kissing, not proofread

A/N. im not back to posting yet, but it was 11pm when i suddenly got the inspiration to write this so~~ here’s a little headcanon. 

# Heeseung 

When I say this man whines. I mean he WHINES 

like full on 😯😒🥺😢 maybe some mood swings here and there.

You two would be playing video games on the couch and he was, well, winning as much as you hated to admit it. 

so you started to complain, “Dude, why are you so good at this game?” 

He goes blank, mouth hanging open. Did you really just call him, dude? 

He will seriously be a drama king about it! 

The controller fell out of his hands, you managing to cross the line before him making you raise your arm in victory while he just stares at you. 

“I won!” You laughed

“Yah...” He started, “You dare call me dude?” 

“I mean, aren’t you a dude?” You asked, raising a brow at him. c’mon, what’s the harm in calling your boyfriend dude? 

He questions all his life choices, just sitting there, blank. 

you had to shake his shoulders to get his attention again, “Heeseung?” 

He suddenly screamed making you jump back from shock, “Hee, what the actual heck!?” 

“Y/n, I think we should break up.” He takes in a dramatic breath. 

“Um, what?” you looked at him, “So suddenly?”

“I won’t have my girlfriend call me, dude.” He said the last word disgustedly, treating it as if it were a swear word. 

“Oh my God-” 

“Maybe...maybe we weren’t meant to be.” He fell to the couch. 

“you are so gosh darn dramatic.” You shook your head, “ok then, if you say so.” You stood up, grabbing your purse, before he grabbed your wrist. 

“No, don’t go!” 

“Dude, make up your mind!” 

He acted as if he was stabbed in the heart, “No more dude, okay? I ban that word from your mouth!” 

“And who says-” 

“Nope! Or no more hugs and kisses!” 

“Evil. You’re evil.” 

“I will if I have to be.” 😇 “Deal?” 

“Okay fine.” 🙄

# Jay

Will give you a whole butt lecture on why you shouldn’t call him bro. 😂

like i can totally see him letting it slide maybe once or twice, maybe give you a little brow raise, but when you did it a third time, boyfriend mode is unlocked. 

So you thought you could get away with it when he didn’t mention anything after the second time you did it so you were now a little confident and decided to be cheeky. 

and guess what you decided to do? You had a fake phone conversation with someone. bad idea. 

Hiii, yeah, me? I’m with my bro right now, sorry!” Man, did Jay’s eyes shoot up to look up at you in an instant, “Okay, bye!” 

“Who was that?” 

“Ah, it was Jake’s girlfriend” You told him putting your phone down. 

“Okay, but don’t call me your bro, y/n...” 

“Why not?” You asked ‘innocently.’ quote marks on innocently. 

“Because I‘m not your brother? It’s like if I called you my daughter or my cousin!” 

“No it’s not!” You defended, holding back your laughter

“How’s it different?! I’m your very amazing boyfriend, not your brother! Bro is just an abbreviation for brother. It’s like if I called you cous. That wouldn’t be right because you’re NOT my cousin, right??” He ranted in one breath, wide eyes on you. 

Your held back laughter exploded and you rolled on the floor, holding your stomach. “You’re ridiculous, Jay love.” 

“It’s not ridiculous. It’s a real thing. Why are you-” You interrupted him by ruffling his hair. 

“You’re reaction was perfect. Niki was right.” (poor niki is always the victim in my headcanons 😊)

“niki put you up to this!? Now THAT’S ridiculous. Why am I even surprised?”

“I don’t know, but you always seem to make these sort of situation hilarious” 

He shook his head, “Just please don’t call me bro anymore.”

# Jake

he won’t even confront you. He’ll just be very extra with his endearing names for you hoping that you would get the hint 😂

“Dude, this video is so funny!” You tilted your phone so that he could see.” You didn’t even mean anything by it. You’d just been talking with a lot of people who used the word ‘dude/bro’ a lot and you adapted to it. 

“You’re funnier, snickerdoodle.” 

Okay, that’s a cute nickname, but it kept going. and every time you would call him bro/dude, he would come up with some weird name. 

“Sugar snap tea, can you hand me the remote?” 

“Would you like to cuddle, honey butter biscuit?”

“Are you talking to me?” You asked, confused by the strange behavior of Jake. 

“Of course I am, baby bugga-boo. Who else would I be talking to?” 

Yeah, you were a bit clueless to say the least.

“Okay, what’s with these very um...cringe sweet nicknames?”

“I just love you so much, cuddly-wuddly.” He smiled and you raised a brow. 

“Okay what is it, love?” 

“Woah...I think it’s the first time I’ve heard you actually call me by a pet name all day!” 

“What?” 

“You’ve been calling bro and dude all day.” He complained, “It’s about time you called me, love.” 

“So that’s why?” You laughed, “I’m sorry, it wasn’t on purpose. I’ve just kinda adopted the word after hearing it so much. Didn’t know it bothered you.” 

“Well, now you know, butterbuns.” 

“Okay now you have to stop with these nicknames!” 

# Sunghoon

Sunghoon will 100% look at you like you just committed a crime. 

like, you weren’t even doing a prank or anything. You were just cooking in the kitchen and ‘bro’ slipped from your mouth, 

“Hey, bro! Can you grab the oil from the cabinet?” You asked, as you stirred the pot. 

Won’t even bat an eye before raising a brow at you like, 🤨🤨 “Yeah, Once you stop calling me your bro.” 

You only turn your head quickly to glance at him, crossing his arms and you stifle a laugh, “Seriously, Hoon?” 

“‘Seriously, Hoon?’” He mocked, rolling his eyes. 

“I don’t know, bro. Bro has a nice ring to it.” You teased, seasoning the food. 

He scoffed, “Do bros usually do this?” He turned the stove off, turning you away from the oven and placing a quick kiss to your lips. 

You scrunched your face, “Depe-” 

He interrupted you, “No. No they don’t.” 

You laughed, “Alright alright, I get it! Can I go back to cooking now?” 

“mmm, what’s my name?” 

“Baby, love, Sweetie, love of my life, my handsome boyfriend, please?” 

He nodded, “That’s more like it.” 

“petty.” you smiled

“Whatever floats your boat.” 

# Sunoo

He’ll just...ignore you. 

pftt you actually had the audacity to call him something that wasn’t a personal endearment by you? no way.

literally, you’ll just be like, “Dude, let’s go cuddle!” 

like, this man won’t even bat and eye. he’ll just pretend that he didn’t hear you 

ok? 

“Bro?” You poked him...and poked him until you FINALLY got his attention. 

“That’s not my name.” He rolled his eyes, going back to scrolling through his phone. 

You shrugged, “I quite like it, bro.” 

and he ignored you...again. 

so you just left the couch to do something else for a little bit. 

after about two hours, you decided to try again. 

“Hey bro, can you give me the blanket behind you?” 

he didn’t say anything. 

“Sunoo?” 

“Oh sorry, were you talking to me or your bro?” 🤷🏻‍♀️😇

“Both?” You replied

“That can’t be. Cause I’m not your bro. I’m your boyfriend and since that’s the case, my name is, “Sweetie, love, or Sunoo to you.” 

“Okay, sorry, bro.” You ignored his small lecture with a teasing smile. 

“Yah,” He he widened his eyes, “I’m going to go cancel our reservations!” He shook his head, rolling his eyes once again before grabbing his phone. 

“Wait no no!” You giggled, pulling his phone from him, “Let’s go eat, love!” 

“Hmm” he put his finger to his chin in thought, “promise no more calling me bro?”

“I promise!” you held your pinky out and he hesitated before connecting his pinky with yours’ “You better not be lying or I WILL give you the silent treatment.” 

No really. He will.

# Jungwon 

Ok, he would be kinda confused and also shy about confronting you about it unlike Sunghoon. :))

like...this was so unlike you?? you always called him by a cute nickname of some sort and in his opinion, bro was NOT a cute nickname. 

So hear me out, you two would be on a date at some restaurant that the two of you picked out and that was where you decided to tease him by calling him bro. 

Bad timing, you know, but that’s what made it exciting. 

When the waiter came up to you and he asked him what you wanted, you replied with what you wanted and asked Jungwon, “Hey bro, what about you? What do you want to eat?” 

His face seriously went from 😊 to 🤐 

in front of the waiter??

but nonetheless, he ordered and the waiter gave you a small smile before leaving your table. 

Did he just smile at you? 

Rude. he rolled his eyes. well, in his head at least. he wouldn’t do that in front of you. not a chance. 

So the entire dinner, you just called him bro/dude/bruh, whatever floated your prankster boat. and you thought that it wasn’t working on him considering his coolness about it 

but hold up, he was cool on the outside, but the inside was boiling. like, not mad at you, but in public like this? in front of boys who were smiling at you. nooo

you didn’t notice him wince every time you called him something other than a nickname. 

It wasn’t until the waiter came back that you seemed to get some sort of reaction from him. 

“Hope the food was good. Can I get you anything for dessert?” 

before you could reply, Jungwon was already up and putting his hand in yours’, “Sorry, my girlfriend and I have other plans.” when I say he was passive aggressive. He was passive aggressive. 

poor waiter was left confused when Jungwon shot a glare at him before pulling you out of the restaurant. (of course paying for the meal first) like, he was just doing his job. but Jungwon was also doing his job as a boyfriend 😉 (his words when you asked him later. not mine) 

when you were both walking back to the dorms, you nudged him with your shoulder, “What was that back there?” You started, “Sorry, my girlfriend and I have other plans.” You teased, laughing. 

“Stoooop” He whined, “It’s your fault! Why were you calling me bro?” 

“Just wanted to get a reaction out of you. i thought it wasn’t working, but apparently...”

“Yeah, well we were in public. Of course I’d be upset if some guys were smiling at my girlfriend thinking you were my sister!” He mumbled. 

Yes, of course you told the boys about your lil’ prank. And yes, of course they teased him later, but it’s ok cause he would get back at you.

# Niki

Will do it right back at you. 

I mean, did you really think you could pull this little prank on him, savage Riki?

no. 

“Hey bro, can you get me a cup of water?” 

He’ll look at you for a millisecond before he catches on, “Yeah, sure, sis” 

Now that took YOU by surprise, like what? He just called you sis?

Now you are the one upset, but you were not going to be the one to stop first. oh no. 

So when he comes back with water you thank him, “Thanks bro.” 

“No problem, sis.” 

you cringed in your seat, hating to hear him call you sis. what? you know you started it, but you just wanted to be called ‘love’ :( 

What’s funny is the fact that in the middle of you boths’ petty game of ‘who would stop first’ the boys came back to the dorm to find you calling each other bro and sis. 

they’re just like 🤨🙄 ok? but by now, they were already used to your guys’ odd behavior. 

at the end of the day, it was you, the one who started the prank, who stopped first. 

“Babyyy, I’m sorry!!! Can you stop calling me sis now?”

“I don’t know, I think you need to learn your lesson further...sis” He raised a brow at you, but laughed at your 😲 face. 

“noooo” you dramatically fell to the ground 

he chuckled, “I’m joking, but I hope you won’t call me bro again.” 

“lesson learned” 

[codenamed-queenie]

Jason: "Thanks For Coming To My DEAD Talk"

Jason [giving Stephanie a tour of his favorite safe house]:

Jason: And *here*, we have my wall of inspirational people.

Stephanie: Ooh. Impressive. I see you've got John Cena up there.

Jason: Master of Stealth. Better than B, at any rate...

Steph: And Hozier?

Jason: King of the lesbians. Artemis's fav artist. Personal Friend. Moving on?

Steph: Hold up WHAT

Jason: Moving on? Right here, you have Oscar Wilde. Greatest author of all time, at least in my...book.

Jason [nudging her]: Ah? Ah?

Steph: ...

Steph: Nah, man Ima need you to explain the Hozier thing again.

Jason: Right next to him is good ol' Williwas Shookspeared. Inventor of the word 'swagger' and therefore my biggest hero.

Steph: ...Is that Shakira?

Jason: Her hips don't lie, Steph. Those are words to live by.

Steph: Well okay, then.

Steph: Wait...that's a picture of you.

Jason: Yeah, and?

Steph: ...

Jason [sighing]: Fine, yes. Just like Shakira's hips and George Washington--who you'll note is right up there next to Stuart Semple--I cannot tell a lie.

Jason: I am often inspired by myself. Now, you might think it's vanity. But there's no pride in it, no self-glorification. Every morning I wake up and take a good long look in the mirror, and I face the same question every time. Who am I? What mark am *I* gonna make on the world today? How many bastard thugs am *I* gonna punch in the face? How am *I* gonna make a difference?

Jason: And in the end, really, that's all what it comes down to. Personal resolve. It doesn't matter how many awesome people I put up on this wall, how many inspirational quotes I save on Pinterest--

Steph: WAIT WHAT--

Jason: No one will ever believe you. ANYway. None of that has any lasting consequence. Because *true* inspiration can only come from within.

Steph: ...

Steph [tearing up]: That was beautiful, Jay.

Steph: I don't care what everybody else says about you, you've got so many freaking FACETS.

Jason: Wait, what?

Steph [through her teeth]: Show me your Pinterest and I'll tell you everything.

Jason [whispering]: Never.

[jesuisgourde]

gay/queer references in Peter’s journals

Again, I have probably missed stuff due to going through pretty quickly and also due to having stared at this document for so long, everything has kind of blurred together.

Sometime close to the day that Carlos & I watched 'Love And Death on Long Island' (and afterwards paraded through the tea rooms of Picadilly) we both filled in application forms and were tres excited to be invited to the same group 'interview' - twas more like an audition though. I got the part. Carlos never. This did not bring any animosity - we both know that success for either of us is magnified a million times if it is shared by us both.

from 'A Diamond Guitar' by Truman Capote "Except that they did not combine their bodies or think to do so, though such things were not unknown at the (Prison), they were as lovers. Of the seasons, spring is the most shattering: stalks thrusting through the earth's winter-stiffened crust, young leaves cracking out on old left-to-die branches, the falling asleep wind cruising through all the newborn green. And with Mr Schaeffer it was the same, a breaking up, a flexing of muscles that had hardened. It was late January. The friends were sitting on the steps of the sheep house, each with a cigarette in his hand. A moon thin and yellow as a piece of lemon rind curved above them, and under its light, threads of ground frost glistened like silver snail trails. Tico Feo had been drawn into himself - silent as a robber waiting in the shadows."

Then a meet with Bounds Green's African prince outside whitechapel tube, rugged lookies at I in military attire & to a ruptured Albion rooms tidied in hours and now lids drawn heated on the eyes. A young looking fella has a crush on me.

Jackie/Camillia/Marie/Kate/Chris/V. churchill Jackie/Evelina/Jasmine/Sachi/Dalston/Sussie Sandra/Carlene/FP/Jay/Dalston/Kraut

There sat a young black man, perhaps in his early or middle twenties. He looked for all the world like the archetypal rude boy. Clean, cheap reebok, nike, adidas variously rolled, laced & zipped about his lean, spreadeagled body that hung loosely about the waiting room chair. Gold & tattoos adorned his person, and a blank animal look was attached to his clear face. He sat before me in a row of four empty chairs, staring at polished floor or the mundane television. A balding white man minced in & all perceptions were suddenly proven to be false as they embraced and snuggled up to each other, giggling & whispering & touching each others noses.... very much in love, fingers crossed for the blood tests.

[Image: an article from Gay Times of an interview with Peter. For some reason, the portrait included alongside the article is of Carl wearing a grey and black t-shirt.] Name? Peter Doherty Age? 22 Where are you? I'm on the motorway just north of Southampton. What kind of day are you having? (Vaguely) Erm... quite misty. Something's waiting around the corner, but there are no corners on the motorway, so we'll just have to wait and see what lies ahead. Maybe something will happen tonight.... What's this we hear about you once being a rent boy? Well, when times are hard, duty calls. How long ago was it? When I was 19, about three years ago. How do we know this isn't just a Shaun Ryder-type lie? 'Cause if it was, it would make me a complete scumbag and I'm not, and I'm not interested in that kind of pantomime. It wasn't a very happy time. I didn't really enjoy it. Why did you give it up? (grimly) Well, certain people disappeared... and anyway, ultimately I found myself no longer in such a vulnerable position anymore. Dawn broke, and I realised that it was a beautiful world after all. Have you done any other dodgy jobs? All of us in the band have tried to deal, but it's not good if you like the drugs too much. You just end up using them yourself! I once was a gravedigger. I used to do it with my mate in Willesden Green cemetery. We didn't actually do the digging, a machine did that, but we used to have to fill them in. It was pretty grim work. So are you gay then? Love is love, wherever it comes from. I'm not anything, really. I am a very sexual person but... I dunno, I believe in liberty... The Marquis de Sade has a lot to answer for... Do you get a lot of gay fans? Yeah - well, there's one guy in particular. He's very shy and he follows us around. He brings in letters and cards and stuff, but he's very quiet. I think John (the bassist) is the main pulling power in the band. Are you jealous about that? Nah! I've known him too long.

You know I'm alright i dont even care i like it when they stare & stare call me queer, dear oh dear a million things & what I wear He's real hard when he's with his mates but I'll saw him again & he was too late

Dear NME I'd have thought after the Gay Times piece, the interview with Rapture fanzine & our recent gig at the Slum Club everything would be clear. No it still remains to give a big hearty fuck off to all these twisted suburban types calling me a liar. Vulnerable young men & women all over the world find themselves victims of circumstance.

she was dressed in suit & tie & lightly etched-on moustache. 'I've always wanted to kiss a bird in the back of a taxi.' she says, running her hand up the fishnet ladders of my thigh. Stepping onto the front line in Bow puddles, elevators, buzzing doors,

[Image: the original page in the book has been preserved. Two paragraphs have been boxed off with biro. They read:] “...cast Richard Burton and Rex Harrison as bickering queer barbers and then much more uncompromisingly in William Friedkin's adaptation of The Boys in the Band (1970), which introduced some of the plainer four letter words in the English language to the screen for the first time. 'Who,' asks Cliff Gorman, in his brilliant portrayal of the most effeminate of the homosexual group as they gather for a soul-searching party, 'Who do you have to fuck to get a drink around here?' Other homosexual manifestations to occur in movies around this time included an elliptical but unmistakeable male fellatio scene in John Schlesinger's Midnight Cowboy (1969) when Jon Voight, as a broke and disillusioned Texas stud importunes in a New York cinema....”

[Image, top left: a blurry photo of John onstage, playing bass. Image, top right, sideways: a photo of the band onstage. Carl and John are on the left, sharing a mic. Peter is on the right, playing guitar and singing into his own mic. Image, centre left: a torn photo of Peter sitting in a chair, shirtless, playing guitar. Only his bottom half from the chest down is visible. Image, centre left: a torn photo of Peter sitting in a chair, shirtless, playing guitar. Only his top half from shoulders up is visible. Image, bottom left: a torn fragment of a photo. What looks like a denim-clad knee and a yellow carrier bag are visible. Image, bottom middle: a photo of someone's knee in torn jeans, taken from under a table. Image, bottom right: a torn photo of Carl in a black sleeveless shirt, posing with his fingers in his mouth.] [A paragraph from the original page of the book has been left exposed and boxed off with black biro. It reads:] “The Boys in the Band was displaced by an immeasurably more powerful portrayal of homosexual groups, Fortune and Men's Eyes (1971). Set in a Quebec prison, this disturbing, factually based drama vividly recounted the corrupted of a heterosexual convict trapped in a tough, potentially vicious homosexual society. In one horrifying scene, a weak, put-upon prisoner is gang-banged by his fellow inmates; in another, the 'hero' is blackmailed by his cellmate into accepting him as his lover for the duration...”

Like a cat on a hot tin roof Like a macho man in a roomful of poofs I have tried in my way to be free.

[Written in Peter's handwriting] Jerome... is that how it's spelt? [Written in someone else's handwriting] Yes it is [Written in Peter's handwriting] Can I read you something? [Written in someone else's handwriting] Yes please.....

I insist, new book of Albion, befuddled by drugs I may yes about 2 but I do not miss out entirely on the subtleties of the inhuman relation ships that are this the mainstay of my stay here in one bounce of a loaf. Boys are fooled into fooling with boys. [...]

More general references/some extra explanations:

“The boy looked at Johnny” is a line from Patti Smith's song “Horses,” part one of a three-part song called “Land.” In the song, a young man named Johnny is assaulted by another man in a locker room; he then mentally journeys to other fantastical lands and visions. A lot of people interpret it as being about gay sex, although some people interpret it as being about a stabbing.

Peter quotes and references Jean Genet's writing and works about Jean Genet many times. While Genet's works are nearly all about crime and prison (one of Peter's main interests and points of fascination), all of his works are very explicitly gay. The Thief's Journal is more about Genet's various lovers than it is about his criminal history. Our Lady Of The Flowers is about a drag queen and her criminal lovers, and is also extremely erotic.

(“Jerome” is Jerome Alexandre, vocalist of The Deadcuts, who was friends with Peter and Mark Keds.)

[petersasteria]

Love Documentary - Harry Holland

Harry || Main || Taglist

Pairing: Harry x Reader

Requested? Nah.

3,470 words

TW; one mention of death, heartbreaking

* * * *

“Hi everyone! I’m Harry Holland and what you’re about to see, are short interviews that I did with people as I ask about what great love really is. Sit back, relax, and enjoy this love-filled journey.”

-

“Are you ready?” Harry asked and the old couple looked at him and nodded with a smile. Harry smiled too and started filming them. “So, how did you two meet?”

“We were childhood best friends.” The old man smiled as he reminisced the early days of his childhood. “I was a hopeless romantic and she wasn’t, but it all worked out in the end.”

“He was really cheesy.” The old man’s wife added with a laugh, causing Harry to laugh too. “He recited lines from movies just to get me to be with him. It was like he knew that we’d end up together.”

“Did the lines work?” Harry asked.

“They didn’t, but look where we are now.” The old lady smiled at her husband.

“We’ve been married for 60 years.” The old man proudly said.

“Are you each other’s greatest love?” Harry asked.

“I’d say we are.” The old man responded as the old lady nodded in agreement.

“We are.”

“So, for you, what is great love?” Harry asked. That was the important question. He needed that to be answered.

“Great love is loving someone unconditionally. No matter what happens between the two of you, you’ll still love them.” The old lady answered. “Right?” She looked at her husband.

“Right.”

-

Harry sits behind the camera as he watches the old man sit comfortably in his seat. The old man nods at Harry, signaling that he’s ready to be interviewed. Harry smiled softly and started recording.

“Please tell me your name, sir.”

“My name is Henry and I’m 82 years old.” Henry, the old man, said. Harry nodded before looking down on his notebook to write Henry’s name and age. After doing so, he read the question that he wrote there earlier.

“Who is your great love?” Harry asked.

“That’s easy; it’s my wife.” Henry answered with a sweet smile. “She’s the loveliest person you’ll ever meet and she makes the most delicious pancakes from scratch.”

“She sounds lovely.” Harry smiled. “How long have you two been married?”

“55 years this year, but this will be the first time I’ll be celebrating without her. She passed away.” Henry shared. The sadness was evident in his eyes and it made Harry sad.

“How did you two meet?”

“We met at a car repair shop. She was the mechanic and I was there getting my car fixed. She was the only girl I’ve ever been with and I have no regrets. Everyday, she loved me like there was no tomorrow. No one’s ever loved me like that and I will forever yearn for it.” Henry said, not bothering to wipe the tears streaming down his face.

“And, what’s great love for you?” Harry asked.

“For me, great love is being an all in one person for your one and only person. You’re the best friend, the sidekick, the lover; everything. When you meet your great love, you wouldn’t find anyone else.” Henry answered.

-

“Hi! I’m Harry Holland and I’m just popping in to say that the elderly know so much about great love. So, I asked the youth what they think is great love.”

For you, what is great love?

“I’m Amaranthine LaSpina and I’m 21 years old. They say that great love is what Jesus did for us, but I don’t know about that since I don’t believe in things like that. But in my opinion, great love doesn’t necessarily mean ‘romantic love’. It can take on many forms like friendship, family, etc. The constant factor is that they are people who care for you regardless of the decisions you made and will make. They offer you their full opinions without bias, and still support you even though you go on a different path. In summary, they want what they think is best for you without being control freaks.”

“Hiii, I’m Jaemren and I’m 15 years old. For me, great love means having an instinct, of some sort, to treat someone as part of your family even though you’re in a relationship with them or if they’re just a friend or if they’re an artist who doesn’t know you exist. You will have the sudden urge to protect them at all cost because you don’t want them to get hurt. Because if they get hurt, you feel their pain; you feel like you’re getting hurt too. Of course, you will correct them when they’re wrong and you’ll be comfortable around them because you feel at home when you’re with them, y’know? Like, there’s warmth. Great love is treasuring someone you don’t want to lose in your life and in terms of feeling it, I think reassurance is the best way.”

“Betty Montefalco, here! I’m 20 years old now and great love will always be there. It’ll always fight for you- in fact, it never slept without an argument. It’s great, it’s explosive, it’s annihilating, it could be exhausting, but at the end of the day- it’s what you want and it’s what you go back to. Even when you’re not in that headspace or happenstance anymore, it’s yearning for someone for the rest of your life; consciously, subconsciously, or unconsciously. If you’re lucky enough, maybe you’ll get to see the greatness endure and eventually flourish in this lifetime. If not, I believe you get to have that love elsewhere. Maybe in another lifetime or in a mirrored universe. I believe the people we yearn for were put in our lives for a reason and none of these people go to waste. I try to remind myself that everyday and that not everything’s figured out yet.”

“I’m Lucas and I’m 18 years old. For me, great love just boils down to understanding a person to the deepest level. It doesn’t even need to be exclusive to a romantic kind of love. True love, for me, is knowing the person in every situation. I don’t mean that the person knows your favorites or knows your deepest, darkest secrets. Knowing the person in every situation is knowing how to talk to you in times of your happiness, knowing how to keep you happy, and knowing how to be there for you in tough times without being intrusive or anything. They can sense when something is wrong about you or if you’re feeling off and they really know how to help you. They don’t even need to be your lovers or even best friends. It takes a certain kind of empathy to be able to understand someone’s emotion so well and knowing how to help you with those emotions is what I believe to be the greatest kind of love one can show to another.”

“HAHAHA, great love??? I haven’t experienced that yet. I only have my firsts, but I don’t consider them my great loves. My expectation is that hopefully we’re in the same wavelength-ish. To me, it doesn’t matter how they will be. Hopefully no sacrifices will be made. You can get great love from your friends and family. Like, you do stuff for them just because you love them. Oh, I’m 21 years old and my name is Hebe. It’s pronounced like ‘Phoebe’.”

“I’m Alessandra; 21 years old. Honestly, I don’t know what great love is. But I guess it’s something that makes someone’s world meaningful. Crushes come and go, but great love stays.”

“I’m 18 years old and my name is Dash. Great love is where you can experience the good and bad without ever getting tired nor ever get sick of the person. It’s trusting the person who you experience great love with.”

“I’m Jai and I’m 18 years old. Greatest love. As someone who ceases to exist, but lives by the quote ‘we accept the love we think we deserve’, I definitely have no idea what love truly is. In the first place, we shouldn’t even be rationalizing what it is. I once told a friend that I never believed in love. I was teased about it, but sometimes I just want someone to take me in their tender arms and cover me in dirt, cover me in roses. As gravity pulls me in their arms; I’ll feel warmth, I’ll feel safe, I’ll feel at home. Oh, to have someone be the mark of who I need to be, to have a blossoming reverie with, like the way they came in my life would feel so right. I think greatest love would make me want to twist and turn, cry and burn, but I’d like it.”

-

Harry sat in his room editing his ‘great love documentary’ and he’s frustrated. He couldn’t feel a thing from it. He felt as if he’s lacking some kind of passion, but he doesn’t know what it is; he can’t put his finger on it. So, he saved the video and went to the kitchen to fix himself a sandwich. While doing so, he took out his phone and called his mum.

“Harry!” Nikki happily said through the phone. “How are you?”

“I’m alright. ‘M just a bit stressed, that’s all. You?” Harry asked before putting his mum on speaker, so he can decently make a sandwich.

“I’m alright. I’m just editing pictures. How’s the documentary coming along? Is it like you pictured in your head?” Nikki asked.

“Yeah, it’s alright. It’s not finished, but it’s all coming together. The documentary isn’t the problem, though. It’s me. I feel like something’s lacking in me. Like, I don’t feel a thing while asking those ‘for you, what is great love?’ questions. When I asked old couples, I didn’t feel my heart swelling with joy and love. Is something wrong with me?” Harry explained.

“No, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Then, what is it? I want this documentary to work, I really do. I just want to be a great director. Not just for this project, but also in projects that I’ll do in the future. But I can’t do that if my feelings aren’t in the right mood or place. Am I making any sense, mum?” Harry sighed before taking a bite out of his sandwich.

Nikki laughed, “I definitely know what you’re talking about. Harry, darling, you’re not inspired. That’s it. You’re doing a documentary about ‘great love’, but you don’t have one yourself.”

“Do I have to find someone as soon as possible?” Harry asked. “I don’t want to put this documentary on hold.”

“You don’t have to find someone as soon as possible and you don’t have to put your documentary on hold. You’ll find someone along the way, I promise you that. Just do what you have to do.”

“How do I know if I meet the right one?”

“You’ll just know. Trust me.”

Harry sighed, “Okay. Thanks, mum.”

“You’re welcome. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Harry hung up and finished his sandwich before going back to his room to continue editing.

-

Harry took his time with the documentary. He needed the inspiration to continue, so he took a break from it. He was in the neighborhood with a small ball in his hand as he walked Tessa for a little bit of exercise. That’s when he saw you. You were painting a piece of cardboard as you sat on the grass. Your eyebrows were knit as you concentrated on what you were doing. He walked up to where you were and stood next to you. He removed the leash from Tessa’s collar and threw the ball. Tessa immediately ran off to find the ball and Harry finally gave you his attention.

You felt his presence next to you, but you didn’t mind him. After all, he was a stranger.

“Um, hi!” Harry spoke, causing you to look up from painting. You gave him a tight-lipped smile and said, “Hello.”

“What’re you doing?” Harry asked as he crouched down to see it better.

“I’m doing a miniature version of The Office. Right now, I’m painting the walls. So, when I put them together, it looks like an empty office. I already have the grey felt paper for the carpet flooring of the whole office. I haven’t sticked it yet because I have to cut out the exact shape of the floor if that makes sense.” You rambled as you continued painting.

“That sounds… tiring.” Harry said. He looked around and saw Tessa coming back to him. He pats her head before throwing the ball once more, making the dog leave again.

“It’s really tiring. I’m just glad that I have all the materials and the patience to make things like this. A few months ago, I did Rachel and Monica’s apartment. It was epic!” You grinned before looking at him. “What do you do?”

“Excuse me?” Harry asked, sitting down next to you to stretch his legs.

“Like, what do you do in your free time, or just in general? What are your hobbies? Anything.” You asked him.

“Oh! I, uh, I’m a filmmaker.” Harry answered. You looked at him for a while and nodded. “That’s interesting. I’ve never met a filmmaker before. I guess this’ll be my first time meeting one.”

“There’s a first time for everything.” Harry chuckled awkwardly. “I’m Harry, by the way.” He extended his hand to you.

“Like the prince?” You asked and he laughed, but nodded. “I’m Y/N.” You shook hands before you continued painting. Tessa came back with the ball and Harry took it from her before throwing it again.

“What kind of films do you make?” You asked as you carefully put the cardboard down on the spot next to you to let it dry. You grabbed another cardboard and started painting it.

“Just anything that comes to mind, really. Right now, I’m making a documentary about ‘great love’.” Harry said and you nodded.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why are you making a documentary about ‘great love’?” You asked. You paused painting to look at him with curious eyes. Harry looked at you and shrugged, “There’s no special reason, actually. I just want to experiment. It sucks, though. I don’t feel it and I hate that I don’t feel it.”

You nodded in understanding, “You need a muse, y’know, like an inspiration.”

“Funny. My mum said the same thing.” Harry chuckled which made you smile.

“Great minds think alike.” You giggled. “Your mum and I should hang out, then. We clearly have the same thoughts.”

“I’ll tell her.” Harry said. You both laughed and you looked at your watch. The sun was about to set and you decided it’s best to start packing up your materials. Harry helped you pack up and when you were done, you smiled at him.

“Thank you.” You said and he just grinned in return. “I have to go. It was nice meeting you, Harry.”

“It was nice meeting you too, Y/N.” Harry said. At that moment he realized that if he lets you go, he probably would never see you again. If he never sees you again, his mind will swarm with what could have been’s and what if’s. He didn’t like it already. He knew he had to decide now and he did.

“Can I have your number, Y/N?”

-

As cheesy as it sounds, Harry became motivated in his work again. He began to really feel things towards you and it made him soar. His mum was right. He’ll know when he meets the right person for him. Lucky for him, he found that person at 22 years old while others aren’t so lucky.

He never doubted you for one second. He knew that you were the right person for him. That’s why he confidently asked you on a date. He was delighted when you agreed to go on a date with him. Eventually, one date turned into multiple dates. You even met his family. You thought it was too soon, but he insisted on introducing his great love to his loved ones.

You and Harry didn’t have a label yet and you were still at the ‘getting to know’ stage of your ‘relationship’. Harry learned about your quirks while you learned about his likes and dislikes. It was truly an exciting experience for you because it’s different and new; it’s refreshing.

Harry was your breath of fresh air on a sunny day. He was your quiet life in the countryside. With him, you were peaceful and safe. Your life would come to a pause when you’re around him because you want to live in the moment. You were merely a passerby in this situation.

Of course, passersby come and go. People who pass through the countryside rarely stay because it would only be a matter of time until they make their way back to the hustle bustle of the city.

And it happened to you.

His name was Jack. You and Jack had a long history together, but you both went your separate ways for reasons you could barely recall. You know how people have something consistent in their lives? Jack was yours and you were his. Even if you weren’t together anymore, both of you knew that you’d have each other no matter what. You didn’t know how Jack found you, but he did. After all, that’s how fate works.

Then suddenly the life in the countryside didn’t seem as enticing as it was anymore. The air made you feel suffocated and the sun started burning your skin. Your quiet life in the countryside began to make you feel agitated. Your life desperately wanted to play, but it stayed on a pause and you feared that it would stay that way. You wanted to move on and go through the roads up ahead, but something- someone, rather, was holding you back.

You knew it was time to come clean. As much as you enjoyed and liked Harry’s company, you just couldn’t stay with him. It pained you to realize that the countryside wasn’t for you even if it seemed so perfect. But fate tied you to the city and a city person, you’ll remain. When you told Harry, he didn’t understand it. You didn’t expect him to understand immediately, but you knew that in time, he will.

And he did.

He didn’t let you go; you just left. Besides, he could never let you go. You were the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He was crestfallen for a long time, but his mum told him that things would get better. And she was right… again.

Harry moved on too, but he never forgot about you. To him, you’ll always be in his heart. He finally finished the documentary and he was happy with the outcome.

-

“Hi, it’s Harry! I’ve decided to add a little clip of me saying stuff that I’ve learned throughout this documentary.” Harry said with a small smile on his face.

“I’ve learned that great love is different for everyone. Great love is loving someone unconditionally and great love is also being an all in one person for your one and only person. Great love is or are people who care for you regardless of the decisions you make and will make. They also want what’s best for you. You have the urge to protect them at all costs and you treasure them because you don’t want to lose them in your life.”

“Great love will always be there; it stays. It’s what you want and will go back to, no matter what. It’s yearning someone for the rest of your life. Great love is understanding someone on the deepest level and you do things for them just because you love them. It’s something that makes someone’s world meaningful. Greatest love would make you want to twist and turn, cry and burn, but you’d like it. You’d like it because it comes with it.”

“During the process of this documentary, I’ve met my great love. I realized that all the answers that I’ve heard made sense when I met this person.”

“Unfortunately, this person isn’t in my life anymore. I used to curse life because of it, but now I get it. I was not their great love, but they were mine. What I felt for them was special and I will never feel that way for someone ever again. I now understand that just because I found great love for me, doesn’t mean that I’m their great love too. I will forever yearn for this person, but I will move on. I am moving on.”

Harry paused for a second and smiled at the camera, “Thank you for watching.”

* * * *

lol what do yall think??? i personally like how it turned out. feedback would be greatly appreciated. you are all my great loves 🤍

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @thatforgottenangel @turtoix @givebuckyhisplumsnow @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @yourstrulyamour @euphorichxlland @thevelvetseries @buckymylove @more-like-reyna @aayaissaa

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @holland-styles @trustfundparker @calltothewild @felicityparkers @hufflepuffprincess24 @tommysparker @justasmisunderstoodasloki @quaksonhehe @call-me-baby-gir1 @itstaskeen @theonly1outof-a-billion @lost-in-the-stars03 @justafangirlduh @piscesparker @speedymaximoff @miraclesoflove @lexirv @blairscott @getbywithasmile @pqrkerr @lavender-writer @blackbat2020 @hoodpankow @bi-lmg @emmastarz

+ @leafy-holland (oml why cant i tag u??)

[entertainment]

Entertainment Spotlight: Nyambi Nyambi, The Good Fight

Nyambi Nyambi currently stars as investigator Jay DiPersia in The Good Fight, which is now in its fourth season on CBS All Access. Most notably known for his rendition of sarcastic café owner Samuel in Mike & Molly, Nyambi’s other tv credits include PBS’ Mercy Street, NBC’s Blindspot, and ABC’s American Koko. In theater, Nyambi has performed both on and off-broadway. He will next be seen in the new Billy Crystal movie Here Today. A comic book aficionado and avid gamer, he lent his voice to the Martian Manhunter in the animated features The Death of Superman and Reign of the Supermen. Nyambi is a first-generation Nigerian-American and serves alongside Danai Gurira on the board for Almasi Collaborative Arts, an organization dedicated to developing emerging African artists. Check it out:

You have worked in both the theatre and on screens. How does your work/preparation differ? Do you prefer one over the other?

I love being on set. When I was a ballplayer, I was known as a “gym rat”. Always on a basketball court working on my game. Nowadays, the set is my gym. I’m on set even on my days off because I love seeing the work all come together. However, my roots are in the theater, so the thrill of being on stage in front of a live audience is almost impossible to beat.

Before every scene or play, I write down a list of reminders from advice I’ve received over the years, words that have inspired me: 

BREATHE | LISTEN | IMAGINE with the five senses | GO GET WHAT YOU WANT| SURPRISE YOURSELF | TRUST your partner | the work, IT’S DEEPER | ALL THE PIECES MATTER | NOTHING IS SOMETHING | You know what…F@#% IT | LET GO & PLAY

Be prepared to let go and play. I do a lot of research in my prep to build enough confidence to let go and play. When preparing for a play, the story is all there for the actors to unpack. What isn’t on the page but needed to tell the story will be imagined to further deepen those discoveries. 

When preparing for episodic television, you make strong choices that move you based on what is on the latest version of that script. Still, you have to be flexible with what you’ve imagined because what is on the page the next week can contradict that. I remember when I first got Mike & Molly, I had created this elaborate backstory the same way I would for a play. Every script after that, I’d either discover something new about the character or something that contradicted what I previously imagined for the character. It became a fun game of “who am I this week?” I had to let go and play. So, the immigration episode on The Good Fight was another example of turning my personal imagined backstory on its head. That made the shock of the episode all the more real for me.

Can you take us through a typical day on the set of The Good Fight?

The moment I sit in the passenger seat of the van sent to pick me up is when my day on set begins. It’s my first opportunity to connect with another person, an opportunity to listen. That driver has usually been waiting thirty minutes to an hour before my pick-up time, so the least I could do is say, “thank you for waiting.” Then from there, the conversation goes where it wants to go. I’ve listened to amazing life stories, discovered new music, received invaluable advice on relationships, shared a mutual love for Star Trek: The Next Generation, and learned how to drum from a world-class drummer. All on my way to work.

When I arrive, I make a point to say hello to all I can as a PA ushers me to my dressing room. I write a couple of pages of continuous stream of consciousness on the day’s scenes before I head up to Hair & Make-up. This is where the most fun happens and where I will first see the actors I get to play with that day. The music and joy I experience in HMU, along with the physical transformation, make this an opportunity to let go of the outside world and drop into this blessing that we all get to share in together. We’re making great television. I love the men and women in that room. Once I’m camera ready, I’ll either say, “see you on the ice” or “see you on the court.”

I head back to my dressing room to get into wardrobe while warming up my voice and speech. Once dressed, I get approved by someone from the wardrobe department. Once approved, a PA will let me know when it’s time to go to set for rehearsal. When that time comes, I’ll greet the episode’s director and the other actors, and we’ll go through the scene for lines, then for blocking and then for the crew for marks. We then wait 10-15 minutes for cameras to get into position, which is more time for me to drop in through drawing or music. When they’re ready, we block it for cameras. Once it all looks good, they’ll say, “Last looks,” and hair, Make-up, and Wardrobe will make sure we look right. The actors then get into position before the director yells out, “ACTION!”

As actors, our energy sets the tone, and I think it’s important to be a joy on that set, not a concern.

If you could be any kind of superhero you wished, what would be your ideal superhero combination (title, power, public persona)?

Right now, my ideal superhero combination would be the ability to mutate on a cellular or molecular level. That would enable me to look like any person, but more importantly, to replicate the necessary physiology of an immune body to cure disease. Every-Man. When I’m not Every-Man, I’m a lab technician at Cedars Sinai Hospital.

What advice would you give to young Black actors looking to get their first break in the industry?

That’s why I say I have a thousand mentors. The men and women before you have lived it so they can tell it. Don’t be afraid to ask for their advice. The learning never stops. Keep going, keep growing, and ever-evolving. What’s for you will be yours, and what’s not for you, you celebrate the one it’s for and keep going, trusting your time will come. January 7, 2010, I was negative $300 in my bank account, but I was skipping down the street because a quote a mentor told me over and over again finally became my gospel truth: “This is but a season in my life, it’s not my life. And as the seasons change, so too will this.” The next day was my audition for Mike & Molly.

What’s your favorite comic/comic universe? Why?

My favorite comic depends on the mood I’m in. It can range from J Michael Straczynski’s Supreme Power, Frank Miller’s Batman Year One, or currently, Bitter Root by Chuck Brown, David F. Walker, & Sanford Greene. My favorite comic universe is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Why, because they’re green. Seriously, the current IDW run is so good. I grew up loving Donatello because he may not have the leadership of a Leonardo, nor the brute strength of Raphael or the Zen charisma of a Michelangelo, but he does have that brain. Plus, a broomstick was the only item in the house that resembled any of their weapons.

What would be your dream role to play? Why?

My dream role would be connected to basketball in some way because it informed such a huge part of my life, playing through college. Otherwise, I’m fascinated by comic book artists such as Denys Cowan, who was one of the founders of Milestone Comics, a phenomenal universe created and owned by African Americans.

Thanks for taking the time, Nyambi! Head on over to Action to check out the rest of our #BlackExcellence365 Spotlights. 

[longitudinalwaveme]

The CW Rogues: My Biggest Gripe With the 2014 Flash Show

In many ways, the CW Flash show is what got me into comics. While I had watched (and loved) Justice League and Justice League Unlimited and read loads of DC guidebooks as a kid, it wasn’t until I saw a clip from the 2014 CW Flash show that I really got invested in the DC Universe. While I had already started watching B:TAS (and loving it), Batman wasn’t what got me into comics. No, that was the Flash...or rather, it was Captain Cold. While watching a clip from the Justice League episode Flash and Substance on YouTube, I saw a link to a clip from “Family of Rogues” (from Season 2 of CW’s Flash). Intrigued by the premise, I found the show on Netflix, watched the entire episode, and was hooked. Not only was the Flash just as nice as he had been on Justice League, but two of his Rogues were siblings, and they actually cared about one another. I wanted to know more, so I looked Captain Cold and the Golden Glider up. My research into Cold and Glider led me to the other Rogues, and soon I became a Flash fan. I watched the show, I re-watched “Flash and Substance”, I read articles about the characters from the comics...and eventually, I started reading the comics themselves. I loved the characters and the lore, and I enjoyed the generally lighthearted tone of the books even into the modern era. Unfortunately, as I learned more about the comics, I grew less and less interested in the 2014 TV show. It made too many alterations to character I liked in the comics...and eventually, I basically stopped watching the show out of frustration. Ironically enough, by getting me into comics, the show alienated me from itself....and a big reason for that was the way it handled the Rogues. Here’s a rundown of the CW Rogues, and why I was frustrated with most of them. 

1. Captain Cold. I actually enjoy Captain Cold on the CW show; he’s recognizable as Len Snart and his sarcasm game is on point. (It doesn’t hurt that Wentworth Miller is really attractive, either). His relationships with Lisa, Mick, and Barry are fantastic, and it’s a relief to have him be treated as a competent threat. That being said...he’s a bit too suave for Captain Cold, isn’t he? Silver Age Cold thought he was suave, but he wasn’t; and modern Captain Cold is middle-aged, grouchy, and very rough around the edges. His smooth, suave nature reminds me more of classic Sam (the original Mirror Master) than Captain Cold. 

2. Heat Wave. Dominic Purcell did a great job with the role he was given, and physically he’s an excellent match for Mick. That being said, CW Mick is very different from the Mick in the classic comics, who was a bit dim-witted and rather gentle and sweet for a supervillain. CW Mick, by contrast, is, as I think @gorogues put it, “Hothead McAngryman”, which wouldn’t be so bad if it didn’t seem to have bled back into the comics themselves. Villains with fire powers being hotheads is a bit overdone, so I’m not thrilled to see comic Mick being put into that role. 

3. Golden Glider. Hands down, Lisa is my favorite of the CW Rogues. Despite the fact that her costume and power set are completely different than they were in the comics, they managed to get her personality down pretty well; making her just as dangerous and competent as the boys. Flirtatious, crafty, devious, and yet still at least somewhat sympathetic, the CW version of Lisa Snart takes home the gold for the best adaptation of a Rogue. If only they hadn’t completely forgotten that she existed. 

4. Pied Piper. Note that I have not seen his Season 6 appearance, so I’m just judging this based on his appearances in Seasons 1 and 2. Piper is disappointing; in his first appearance he wasn’t as fun as Silver/Bronze Age Piper or as sympathetic as modern Piper, and I’m not crazy about the idea of him being motivated primarily by revenge on Wells/Thawne, since that wasn’t his motivation in the comics at all. I also don’t remember him being able to puppet or hypnotize people with his music, which is too bad, since that’s his main schtick in the comics. What’s more, if you want to reform a character, don’t do it offscreen via reality warping and then forget about him for four seasons. It sounds like his Season 6 appearance was better, but I haven’t seen it so I can’t comment on it. Also, “the Pied Piper” is kind of a nonindicative name if he doesn’t play a pipe/flute. 

5. Trickster II (Axel Walker). Axel was actually decent in the CW show. I still like comic Axel better, but they got the gist of his character down and even made him a bit sympathetic. In fact, he’s probably in the top three best Rogue adaptations that the CW did. 

6. Trickster I (James Jesse). I love watching Mark Hamill play CW’s Trickster...but man, he is not playing Giovanni Giuseppi on the CW show. He’s playing the Joker with a different name. It’s especially weird since we know from JLU and that one short where Mark Hamill plays himself, the Joker, the Trickster, and Swamp Thing that Hamill can do a non-Joker Trickster and do it well, so my suspicion is that it was just because Trickster was also the Joker in the 1990s Flash show (where he was also played by Mark Hamill). Regardless, murdering random people and threatening to blow up small children during Christmas is not something the Trickster should be doing. 

Although this does prove Mark Hamill could do a live-action Joker. I’d pay money to see that. Mark Hamill is a great Joker. 

7. Weather Wizard. CW Weather Wizard isn’t egregiously bad. He’s not out-of-character like Trickster, and he’s not boring to watch, but at the same time it feels like there’s something missing. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t quote Twain. Maybe it’s because there’s not the sense that he was a loser before he got his powers. Maybe it’s because they changed his origin completely (and also made him older than Clyde for some reason). It could even be because he’s not wearing a green leotard with a huge collar, puffy sleeves, and ridiculous elf boots. Whatever it is, though, he’s just missing that spark that makes me like comic book Wizard so much. 

8. Mirror Master I (Sam Scudder). I don’t know how you make Sam Scudder more boring than New 52/Rebirth did, but somehow the CW version of the character pulled it off. Granted, Cold had already stolen some of Sam’s characterization, so that didn’t help, but they could’ve leaned into his skills as an inventor or his love of showmanship or something. Instead, we got a generic thug with what was basically Evan McCulloch’s power set. Boo! Boo I say! 

9. Top (Roscoe/Rosa Dillon). The Brave and the Bold Top is more interesting than the CW version, and he doesn’t even have spoken lines! That’s how boring this Top is. Also, the gender swap was pretty pointless. I wouldn’t have minded a female Top if she’d been intelligent and creepy and snobbish in the way that Roscoe is, but why even bother changing the gender if the character is going to have such a minor role? They also substantially depowered the CW Top, since Rosa can’t spin at super speed and isn’t telekinetic. A massive missed opportunity. 

10. Mirror Master II (Evan/Eva McCulloch). I can’t comment on how good of a character Eva is, since I haven’t watched any of the episodes with her in them, but I will say I am disappointed that the character does not seem to be Scottish, does not have Evan’s weird sense of humor, and lacks his tooth gap. 

11. Captain Boomerang (George “Digger” Harkness). Not only did he not actually appear on the Flash, but he was also boring and didn’t even seem to have an Australian accent. I was very disappointed with his role in the CW. 

And now for characters who aren’t Rogues: 

-CW Eobard is really good. I have no real complaints about him. 

-CW Grodd is also really good, though I do wish he was from Gorilla City as per the comics rather than a lab experiment. 

-CW Magenta got most of the important character beats down but felt a bit out of place with Barry as the Flash. 

-CW Shade was possibly even more boring than CW Sam, which is saying something. 

-CW Zoom didn’t really feel like Zoom at all. Not only was it weird to see him fighting Barry and not Wally, but he was just a generic serial killer and didn’t have Zolomon’s unique outlook on the world. The loss of his time manipulation powers was likewise disappointing.

-CW Jay is really good. I love him. 

-CW Jesse Quick has very little in common with her comic book counterpart; I like the comic version better but don’t actually mind the CW version all that much.

-CW Wally is decent enough, though I don’t see why they couldn’t have kept him as Iris’ nephew rather than making him her brother. Also, they didn’t use him nearly as much as they should have. 

-CW Barry I generally like a lot; Grant Gustin is a good fit for the character. That being said, I do wish they hadn’t given him the dead mom origin, which was a retcon I am not fond of. 

-CW Iris is quite good (in the first three seasons, at least); she’s intelligent, loyal to Barry, dedicated to her job, and quite independent. The fact that she and Barry were foster siblings in the CW universe is kind of weird, though, since it makes their romance kind of awkward. 

-Joe West is not Ira West (Iris’s father in the comics), but I actually don’t care. Joe West is made of awesome. (I like Ira too, but I like Joe enough that I don’t mind having him replace Ira.)

-The Fiddler on the CW had very little to do with the comic Fiddler. 

-I’ve never been particularly invested in the Thinker (comic or show), but I will say that the CW’s version of the character was very different from his comics counterpart. 

-CW Ragdoll was just as creepy and unsettling as comic book Ragdoll, though he had a very different backstory. 

-I never expected Baby Josh to make it into the CW, let alone as a gender-swapped teenager named Joss who wanted to kill Weather Wizard. It felt like they never knew where to go with her character, though, so it was a wasted opportunity. At least she didn’t die like poor Baby Josh, though. 

-Big Sir in the CW show is a MASSIVE improvement over the comic version. This is probably the only character I will say this about. Though I will say that I kind of wish he’d gotten his stupidly ugly comic book costume even though it would’ve made no sense. 

-Peek-a-Boo is a pretty solid adaptation of her comic book counterpart. 

-Rainbow Raider (Prism) is much better in the comics than on the CW show, where he only existed to be a boring plot device. 

-Linda Park dating Barry was weird, but they actually did a good job with her character before she vanished.

This is not intended as a criticism of anyone who likes the show or its characters; it’s just me musing about my personal problems with it. 

[bisexualoftheblade-old]

how many wips do you have? like what are they all, and not the number of wips in a fandom? what are all the names?

okay. fuck you. fuck you so much. fuck you.

i’m putting this under a read more cut no one else deserves to see this shit. a lot of these are requests, and for those i will just write out the request itself

Shadowhunters:

domestic polycule fluff with tem, jessa, and will because im not a coward

Supernatural

- hehe hoho i request destiel hehehe

- request 61/? cai cai cai cai i need you to rewrite the destiel scene but yk. GOOD. not like i'm in the know about the spn fandom or anything, it's been years for me. but DO IT

Bright Sessions

- caleb/adam grisha AU

- mark bryant vs. united states aka sue the AM

- caleb/adam college fluff

Umbrella Acaademy

- request 31/? i want a ben and klaus drabble please spare me some brotherly bickering

- AND SO BEGINS NIGHT 4 with request 13/? oooh oooh can i get a raymond and allison playlist??? i think their vibes together would SLAP

- hi there night 2 is technically morning 3 but who's counting not me anyway request 5/? can i get a ben moodboard? gotta rep my tua bb

Percy Jackson

- request 9/? can i get a percabeth moodboard or quote edit?? like god they're the og couple goals take me back to high school cai

- For the 100 follower things :D Jercy getting caught in the rain

- request 29/? a drabble about literally anything to do with pjo. i’ll be happy with anyone and anything i’m love these children

- *somersaults in like I’m a real fancy acrobat* hello ello ello may I request some camp half blood chaos possible involving *does a flip* ✨side characters✨ <3

Penumbra Podcast 

- request 52/? drabble about the penumbra podcast. this is for ren bc ren likes it and i don't actually know anything about it. juno? i think? that's the one ren likes. write it for ren

- Tpp ghost hunting / buzzfeed unsolved au

- sad juno smut

- final resting place fic go brrrr

Marvel

- request 6/? i'm going to my roots y'all can i get a spider-man playlist? if not a playlist then i'd honestly be happy with literally anything involving spider-man

- request 15/? i'm going crazy this is recorded evidence of me actually losing it ANYWAY can i get a quote edit for something from iron man? literally anything that man says is gold so cai's choice :D he deserved better in endgame i'm still bitter

- request 42/? do another spidey thing that differs from the other spidey thing

- request 73/? you have Opinions. rant about infinity way and/or endgame. go.

- request 74/? quote edit for deadpool!!

- spideytorch relationship character study

- peter parker as a tired grad student monitoring the young avengers (send help)

Six of Crows

- okay listen i wasn't going to request anything bc i worry about you but also? if you want to/have the time hit me with a playlist for our girl nina zenik

- request 43/? fuckin give me the ending anya should have had. she is alive and with her new son and having a great time

- request 45/? inej moodboard?

- request 47/? will you make literally any meme of your choosing for six of crows?

- request 48/? write a drabble for kaz, my favorite bastard

- okay so i don't actually like nina or mattias that much but i still wanna hear about your thoughts (and also see if you'll change my mind)

- kaz brekker turning 18 fic. birthday party, everyone singing, whole shebang. i need it stat

- religious trauma fic aka i started shipping kaz/alina/inej and i can’t stop

- kaz trauma soup (he has D.I.D. and you can’t prove me wrong)

- my two redacted fics for @grishaversebigbang​

- wesper fake dating

- six of crows bright sessions crossover: everyone gets therapy

TMA

- uhh... s1 gang having a nice time? melanie getting to have some Pride™️? some "fun" horror thing?

- request 7/? spare steph and jason bonding? please sir? spare some for a humble child such as myself?

- okay so this was meant for night 3 but i had midterm shit SO this is honorary night 3 let's DO THIS request 8/? i want a moodboard of extremely out of context magnus archives shit like i mean confuse the FUCK out of me i don't go here i know Nothing about it

- request 11/? OKAY so i need tim stoker meeting tim drake now i need my timmy to meet your tim plus i want to see character differences no i'm not trying to create a tim stoker in my head so i can read a's fic while NOT thinking of tim drake whaaaaaat you're crazy

- request 18(i think)/? i need a quote edit of every time within the first like. 15 eps of tam where jon is like “sounds fake but go off” thank u bb

- request 40/? i challenge you to write a tma drabble based only on the episodes i've heard. i'm currently halfway through episode 23

- Jon being lovingly bullied into taking a break. I'm aware this has been written a million times but it is one of my favorite things.

- spiral!sasha AU

- extinction martin go brrrrr

- high school era timsasha. they've both been friends for years, and everyone always asks when they will be a couple. they decide to fake date, to prove everyone wrong and show what a bad couple they would be. turns out that's a bit trickier than they thought

- after sasha comes back, tim is broken. he can't let go, scared that if he looks away for even a minute he'll lose her again. sasha suggests shibari as a way for him to give up control

- sasha pov mag 19 au, sacrificing herself to save the others, knows that if she gives herself up to the not!them it will let the others live

- this is the "tim finds a polaroid of sasha" trope

- early archives days,, long nights in research,,, clothes sharing,, somft. late nights and falling asleep at their desks warm and safe in the other's presence

- two parts: timsasha as kids, each picking a constellation that is "theirs". just soft kid antics. tim at sasha's grave glancing up to see their constellations

- continuing your job’s a joke (you’re broke)

DC Comics

- TIMSTEPH HADESTOWN AU,,,

- my redacted fic for @batfam-big-bang​

- request for you to get a decent amount of sleep? serious answer, dickkori, SAL's Venus

- request 4/? timsteph morning after 👀 mayhaps?

- a concept: nonbinary stephanie brown

- teehee hi mom, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, but can i request damian angst for your accomplishments 100 followers?

- hi you can ignore my first request if you want, or you can ignore this one. but bls possibly write some bikini ra’s? -the bikini bitch

- request 27/? jay is asking through me for a jondami playlist but tbh i also want it so win win yk?

- "I don't know how to help you but I can help you find someone who does" with bruce and jason? im just craving bruce being a good day to jason for once

- “I am putting you in time out because you need to understand the consequences of your actions.” with steph and jason as dumbass disaster bi best friends pretty please?

- request 32/? timsteph patrol date!!!

- request 33/? timsteph *gala* date? mayhaps??

- request 37/? tim drake drabble but make it Edgy cai

- request 39/? drabble of a prank war between tim and damian

- joyfire cuddly fluff please? or like just any outlaw fluff if joyfire isnt your thing (feel free to add every member of the outlaws, dont feel like u gotta stick with jason, kori, roy i love them all)

- barbara and robin! jason fluff? bonding over books or something?

- request 62/? i need a drabble about the chaotic trio jason, tim, and steph i'm love them ty

- request 63/? batfam x mcu crossover. batfam meets ironfam. give me ALL the cliches. ALL OF THEM

- request 64/? young justice x young avengers - jay cuz idk SHIT about the young avengers

- request 66/? jondami moodboard pls and ty

- request 67/? timsteph moodboard!!!!!!

- request 69/? HEHEHE kinky 😏 i would v much like a timsteph drabble of the almost first time. does that make sense? like i don't want you to go all the way NSFW cuz i know that's against the rules and i'm a rule follower. but like they *almost* go all the way. this could be fade to black or some shit i don't care just make it a lil steamy and have Fun

- i request damian angst! all of it

- hmm... maybe i request? jondami?

- mayhaps,,,,some batfam,,,,,committing crimes? ily be gay do crime <3 - lu

- How about a ficlet with Steph and Cass?

Found Family Bingo Prompts

- no powers au

- tunnel

- first day

- join the club

- hurt/comfort

- experiment

- playing favorites

- hold on

- possession

- 10 o’clock

- singing

- road

- snitch

- curfew

- timer

- fantasy au

- zombie au

- dreams

- campfire

- are you okay

- movie night

- games

- scared

Miscellaneous

- a request: Write A Drabble, Coward

- is it too late to request a moodboard for me?

- request 20/? i’m going off book because i’m in a Chaotic Mood™️ can you just absolutely vibe check me like go off cai demolish me

- request 21/? i formally request that you pick a favorite cai. i don’t care what that favorite pertains to, just pick a favorite something

- request 23/? roast me

- request 24/? can i have a buzzfeed unsolved spoopy playlist but spoiler alert it’s not spoopy bc shane doesn’t believe does this make sense it has been a Day™️

- request 25/50 i want a jake and amy fic make it Soft cai i’m love them b99 is so good

- request 28/? i know nothing about the lord of the rings so make something that will confuse the shit out of me

- request 34/? malvie and jaylos moodboards 😈

- request 35/? a moodboard for the bbb mods!! perceive all of us!!!

- request 36/? moodboard for the tua mods too???? mayhaps??

- request 41/? doctor WHO? idk but i want a drabble of him and the one character i know from doctor who which is rose

- request 46/? make an alignment meme with our group, have fun!!!

- request 49/? i want you to kin assign me a character from every fandom you can/want to. go feral

- request 50!!!!/? this is a special request. the most special request. can you make a bastards tbh playlist? i want our vibes encapsulated. i want us in music form. i want to hear those songs and be like "that's me and cai" and smile.

- requests 51/? i know jack shit about good omens. explain it to me in the most confusing way possible. make me know less by the end than i know now

- request 53/? can you write a mel aesthetic? i'm Curious

- request 54/? give me a list of book recs cai i want some good book recs pls

- request 56/? edit a picture of US together too

- request 58/? oooh can i have a disney edit? like. hm. i just really love disney and i want anything to do with disney. like a quote or an aesthetic or an aesthetic edit i just want disney.

- request 59/? i would v much like a recipe for carbonara. i've never had it but it sounds fucking delicious

- request 60/? ooh hey can i get a makeup tutorial? i know you like makeup, i'm shit at doing makeup. teach me

- request 65/? i need the most emo playlist you can make that vibes with dear evan hansen thank you

- request 68/? i want a superwholock moodboard. this can be serious, with the actual fandoms in mind, or literally what the era felt like. the insanity. the horror.

- request 70/? ooh ooh ooh do you have a good bread recipe?? i wanna get that bread

- request 71/? i want a playlist with the vibes of summoning a demon. please don't ask questions. i don't have answers. and if i do, no i don't.

- For the requests, how about writing something based on a friend?

- request 75/? MMMM i want literally anything to do with natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812

- request 76/? i want some healthy recipes. help a girl out

- a feral bbb quote or two?

- you perceive my plant but now I dare thee to perceive mine own visage

- okay this is a two for one request. 1. you did the bee movie script so now we need a shrek two script edit 2. sleep please

- Pansexual mb for my lil queer soul?

- my (probably) final request is just for you to ramble about something, i don't really care what

- HI ILY CONGRATS AS WELL CAUSE IM LATE BUT CONGRATS. could i request a pirates of the caribbean (or just pirates) or whatever you what to do, free range.

- mood board for the beluga whales who got brought to the animal sanctuary in Iceland please?

- 100 follower request: Moodboard for my stuffed cow Oaky?