#“so you may NOT just write someone Holding The Baby because that's like something people might actually want to read!”
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nostalgia-tblr · 2 years ago
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I had another fic idea and the brain was like "no, that's too fluffy and romantic and YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO WRITE NICE THINGS, PEOPLE WOULD JUDGE YOU" but then I went "but what if it was kind of... comedy fluff?" and brain went "...yeah, okay, if you really must." Which I fucking HATE! Why can't I write nice things, brain?! Everyone else is allowed to! FFS, it's fanfiction, it doesn't have to be ~deep~ or any of that shit!
This has actually been a bit of an issue when I'm trying to write The WIP because while I told myself yeah sure go ahead and write the massively self-indulgent epically long (by my own odd standards) fic but still sometimes I get stuck because I'm not "allowed" to write something that appeals to me and my own sometimes niche interests??
Like angst I can do because that's "proper" somehow? WTF is that about? It's not proper! It's still daft! And comedy I'm allowed because I dunno apparently if it will make someone laugh that means it has "value"? It's very annoying, I don't like it.
Do other people have this? How do you deal with it? You'd think after all this time I'd be okay with writing any old shit that I want to. If anything it might be worse now. I remember years ago I could tell myself "Look, if you've spelled most of it correctly then it's already in like the better half of all the fanfic on the internet" which isn't really TRUE but I could go along with that and let myself write whatever-the-fuck I wanted to.
You know how many of us go "I'll write this fucked up thing... but I'll post it as Anon"? I get that with fluffy fic ideas as well. Or with things that are "too shippy" (WTF?) It's just such a stupid and weird form of self-criticism and it bothers me a lot.
#ranting at myself#writing stuff#possibly this is a mental illness thing but i don't think it is but it might be?#i am Quite Mad but it usually manifests related to fic as the usual “you suck!!” or irritating OCD things about wordcounts or such#this is a VERY SPECIFIC thing and i don't even know where it came from?#maybe i'm just pretentious? do i look pretentious? i might be?#(the fluffy thing was sylki fic where spinning off on the 'oh no unable to express feelings!' they have to pass each other notes)#(the comedy element was that this is Bloody Stupid and also Mobius attempts to Help (oh no) and etc)#(will i ever be able/“allowed” to actually write that thing? dunno!)#the Frigga thing also suffers from “that bit is despicably adorable you should be ASHAMED of yourself”#.The WIP? currently stuck at “okay now he needs to Hold The Baby. this is an important bit you can't skip it. but babies are Too Twee”#“so you may NOT just write someone Holding The Baby because that's like something people might actually want to read!”#“the murders are fine you can write murders. murder isn't twee. babies are VERY twee though.”#PROBLEM: there are several babies in this fic and the next chapter is like... ENTIRELY baby-based#(the end of the entire fic is already written and it's Too Twee as well but i've kind of gone immune to that because it's existed a while)#(oh no did i just spoiler a Happy Ending?!)#(SPOILER: kind of. it depends who you backed in this race and whether you wanted them to Become Better People)#anyway am gonna post this now before i change my mind as i probably should#fic related
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demonpiratehuntress · 1 year ago
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baby (name)! (Mihawk, Buggy, Shanks, Brook, Chopper)
featuring - Dracule Mihawk x F!Reader, Buggy x F!Reader, Shanks x F!Reader, Brook x F!Reader, Chopper x F!Reader
summary - you somehow get turned into a baby and they have to spend 24 hours babysitting you
warnings - my first time writing for ALL of these characters, so i'm sorry if i get their characters wrong! im only 416 episodes into the anime. i tried my best!
a/n - this was requested by @faioula16, i hope you like it!
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MIHAWK
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This could honestly go either way. This guy is unpredictable and even you never know what his next move will be. But you're his faithful and loving girlfriend, so there are some exceptions when it comes to you. Like when some deranged devil fruit user turns you into a baby, and Mihawk could have had someone else take care of you, but he wanted to do it himself. He was curious, now that it was you who was an infant.
But that may also be because a witness to the scene had expressed fear for infant you, saying that Mihawk was too cold and ruthless to take care of a baby. He didn't need to prove otherwise, and he didn't want to, but something just gnawed at him. Protectiveness, maybe. You were in such a vulnerable state right now, only he could protect you and care for you.
It had absolutely nothing to do at all with the fact that you looked so adorable staring at him with your big (eye colour) eyes, reaching out to tap his because the strange colour fascinated you. No, it had nothing to do with how cute your excited squeal was every time he picked you up or looked at you. He was absolutely not entranced by your cute little smile or how you clung to him with little hands that could barely hold his one finger. Absolutely not.
Mihawk is actually a pretty good babysitter. But only for you. He will sit and read to you with you on his lap, trying not to smile when you giggle and smack the book, always catching you when you lunged forward excitedly and almost fell off his lap. He will never finish the story, but he reads to you anyway because you seem to like it...for a little while.
"(Name), no!"
He almost had a heart attack when he set you down for one second to put the book away, and you almost fell off the table because you were trying to crawl to him. Your eyes filled with tears when he yelled, even if he hadn't meant to sound angry. His gaze softened, and he picked up and cradled you against his chest, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple.
"It's alright, I won't hurt you. You're fine, little one."
And then you really are fine, your little body comforted by his actions and words. They lull you into sleep, and soon you rest on his shoulder and fall into a deep sleep, gripping his shirt collar tightly in your tiny fist.
"Sleep well, (Name)."
When you awake, in your usual adult form, you're too nervous to suggest it, but thankfully Mihawk is thinking the same thing.
"I think I'd like a little you or me to keep me company."
BUGGY
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Buggy is horrible with children. I mean he's not great with people, but he is absolutely, terrifyingly not good with kids at all. So when you were somehow turned into a tiny human being who could barely stand on two legs, he was shocked. And slightly scared, though he would never admit it. You were the only person he genuinely liked, so he tried not to be too...rough, with your little form. Picking you up was as far as he got, but even then he held you out awkwardly like a football.
And then you squealed and happily reached for his nose, the bright red circular appendage attracting your attention instantly. Now, Buggy was sensitive about his nose, but he let you touch it. A testament to how much he liked you. And, if he were being honest, you were actually kind of cute squeezing his nose like that until he couldn't breath-
Exhale out the mouth.
When he remembered he could use his mouth to breathe, he smiled a little at how much you were enjoying yourself playing with his nose. You even touched his makeup and all his markings, out of curiosity. Your eyes were bright with confusion but also fascination, and it did something weird to Buggy. Made him feel...warm inside?
Then he decided to, experimentally, see what your reaction to his devil fruit would be in this tiny form. He set you down on the floor again, and then detached his hand. Your eyes went wide and you instantly covered your eyes with your small hands, your bottom lip trembling. He panicked, tripping over himself and falling into a tangled heap in front of you. You peeked between your fingers to see this, then burst out into cute laughter. Buggy almost glared at you, but then remembered you were just a baby and instead picked himself up and smiled - or rather tried his best not to smile like a maniac - at you.
Then you saw his floating hand, and grabbed it.
"No no, (Name), that's not-"
You stuck his fingers in your mouth, and he groaned. You just giggled innocently, and only then did he realise his devil fruit could be a source of entertainment for you. He detached multiple limbs and floated them around, watching as you squealed in glee and crawled around trying to catch them.
Were you actually having fun because of him?
When he finally put his body back together again, you pouted but crawled up to his leg and hugged it, gurgling happily as if to thank him. He was stunned. He slowly picked you up and you offered him a toothless smile, before yawning. Still unsure, he laid you on his shoulder and awkwardly patted your back, but that seemed to work because you slowly fell asleep.
When you woke up again, finally an adult, you grinned at him, "Shall we make you a father?"
SHANKS
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It was his fault, really. He picked the fight, contrary to his usual behaviour. But that guy had said something about you, and he couldn't ignore it, so of course he acted. And now here you were, a tiny baby fisting his shirt in your tiny hand and looking up at him with big, curious (eye colour) eyes. He had experience with children, of course, having spent some time with Luffy. But you were so small, so delicate.
"Captain, what-"
He ignored the confused questions from his crew as he brought you back on board the ship, immediately taking you to his quarters. It shouldn't last long, he reminded himself, but he still felt guilty. Though that quickly disappeared when you giggled and crawled around his quarters, knocking things over and hiding with a loud giggle when he caught you.
"Oi, (Name)!" He tried to sound stern, he really did, but his laugh have his mood away. You stuck your head out from under his bed and stuck your tiny tongue out at him, and he burst out laughing. "Oh, you're cute, sweetheart."
He lifted you up again and you squealed excitedly and reached for his hair, the bright colour attracting your attention. He grinned and put you on his head, keeping his hands on your small waist, and soon felt you tug on his red strands. You were giggling and pulling and kicking your legs happily, so he endured the pain just for your sake. It was very cute how you thought his hair was a toy, and by the time you got tired of it, it was a mess. Strands were everywhere, out of place, sticking out...but it didn't matter to him.
Because now you were looking at him with your big, innocent eyes and suckling on your hand as he cradled you against his chest. He gently rubbed your back and pressed a soft kiss to your tiny tuft of (hair colour) hair.
"You're so pretty even as a baby, (Name)."
You rewarded him with a sloppy kiss on his cheek, making him laugh. He sat on his bed with you still in his arms, watching as you grew tired and offered him the cutest sight - the tiniest of yawns.
"Sleep, little one."
He gently rocked you to sleep, reassuringly and soothingly patting your small back as you drifted off on his shoulder. He felt warm inside, as if a small fire had been lit inside him. He knew what it was.
And when you woke up in adult form, he grinned at you, "Let me give you a baby, sweetheart."
BROOK
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Brook has experience with babies. Maybe not human babies, but babies nonetheless. He knows a human baby is very different to a whale baby, but he figures that there can be similarities too. Such as entertainment, which is his area of expertise. So when he looks down at his feet to see baby you tugging on his pants, he is somewhat prepared. He has no idea how you were turned into a baby, of course, but he's not complaining because you are so, so adorable.
"What happened to (Name)?" Franky asked the skeleton, raising an eyebrow.
"Nothing important!" Was Brook's gleeful reply, followed by a laugh when you somehow crawled on top of his afro and knocked his hat off so you could take its place.
"Nothing imp-" Franky sighed. "Do you even know how to look after a baby?" Franky's eyes worriedly drifted to where you sat upon the skeleton's head, tugging on his afro and squealing with delight. You wobbled precariously.
"No, but it can't be any different to a baby whale!"
Franky would have commented on that, if you hadn't slipped off Brook's head. The cyborg easily caught you, before holding you out to Brook, "Don't let her sit on your head."
"Noted."
For the rest of the day, Brook occupied you by sitting you down on his bed and playing music for you, telling you stories about Laboon and his crew, and about his experiences in the Grand Line before you guys found him. He sang all sorts of songs, played all sorts of melodies, while you giggled and clapped your hands excitedly, bouncing up and down. Brook smiled, the sight warming heart - oh, but he doesn't have a heart. He hardly ever got tired, but you prompted him to play for hours on end, until he really was exhausted. So he picked you up, settled on his bed, and lay you on his lap before humming a tune. You slowly drifted off to sleep, and Brook smiled.
He hoped he could play for one of the crew's babies one day.
CHOPPER
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Another island, another mishap, another adventure. No trip is ever boring with the Straw Hats, and this was again proven when an unfortunate encounter with a devil fruit user who could change people's ages led to you being turned into an infant. And that's how you found yourself cradled in Sanji's arms, with Chopper trying to get a good look at you all throughout the walk back to the Sunny.
"Chopper, she's fine," the cook tried to assure the doctor, but Chopper was having none of it.
He was so worried, because no one was equipped to take care of a baby, and he cared about you so much that now you were a baby, he was becoming overprotective. As soon as Sanji set you down somewhere safe for Chopper to examine you, he was grabbing his bag and bringing out all his different tools. He checked all your vitals and made sure you were first and foremost healthy, before he could consider anything else.
Then you touched his blue nose and widened your eyes in fascination, gurgling softly, and Chopper blushed brightly. He smiled and poked your nose back, and you let out the cutest giggle that melted the reindeer's little heart. He shifted to his humanoid form and gently lifted you up into his arms, cradling you as he gazed down at you with the utmost love, adoration and fascination he could manage. You were so tiny, even more so than him, and so so cute. Then you sneezed, looking stunned for a moment before giggling loudly. And Chopper thought there was nothing more joy-inducing than holding and watching baby you.
"Chopper, where's-oh." Nami stopped when she saw Chopper standing there just holding you, one of his fingers in your tiny hand as he cooed at you and made you giggle. She smiled softly and left the room, deciding you were in safe hands.
"You're the cutest baby in the world, (Name)," Chopper told you. You just smiled brightly, exposing your gums cause you had no teeth, and waved your small arms around happily.
Chopper was really good with you. He monitored you throughout the 24 hours, making sure you ate properly, got enough sleep and were bathed properly. He is probably the best caretaker out of all the men on this list, not only because he's doctor but he's naturally caring and nurturing. It comes like second nature to him. Besides, you were such a calm and quiet baby - except for the giggling - that you made it easy for him. He was almost sad when you fell asleep, knowing you'd be grown up again when you woke up.
But maybe one day the crew would be able to fawn over a baby everyday. Maybe one day.
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astridthevalkyrie · 9 months ago
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me getting into a new character: how neurodivergent am i allowed to go
cw: fluff + a few mild horny thoughts
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Rafayel has this little quirk where he's practically incapable of acting like a normal boyfriend. Or a normal person, honestly. Where other people would just take your hand walking down the street, he holds it out with a too-happy, beaming grin so that he can see you take it yourself. Where other people would just sit down at a fancy restaurant, he makes mock offended noises if you try to sit before he can make a big show of pulling your chair out for you.
Where other people would kiss you, he likes biting.
"I'm thinking," he muses, nibbling on your earlobe, "what about a diamond necklace?"
You sigh, burrowing yourself further into him, back against his chest. You're quite comfortable, and you could even fall asleep if it wasn't for his constant yammering. "No."
"Come on," he complains, sinking his teeth into your cheek this time. You let out a brief sound of exasperation, trying to bat at him, but he remains steadfast, tongue poking out to soothe the minor indent he leaves into your skin. "How'm I supposed to prove myself if you won't let me?"
"How would you buying me a diamond necklace prove anything?"
One of his hands slips under your shirt, resting right under your chest. His fingers knead whatever they get in contact with—it's not painful, actually it feels pretty good, not that you'd ever admit it to him. Though you suppose, turning around in his hold and silently indicating to him to pull you closer may just be admitting exactly that.
"It'd prove I'm not cheap, for one thing. I'd be able to tell everyone, whatever my girlfriend wants, she gets! You're so strange, not wanting anything. Do you even know how rich I am?"
"Tell you what," you mumble, burying your face in his neck and completely melting in his arms as soon as his comforting scent fills your senses, "you buy me a quesadilla tomorrow and I'll tell everyone you're practically my sugar daddy."
Rafayel scoffs. "Like anyone would ever believe you were a sugar baby. You don't have the constitution for it."
That might be a new lead in the top ten strangest insults you've ever heard from him. Shooting a small glare up his way, you bite back, "Are you going to let me sleep or are you gonna keep talking?"
"Keep talking," he answers without hesitation, then barrels forward before you can protest. "Hmm, maybe I should just fill my place up with amenities for you. Cheese plates in the kitchen. Exfoliators in the bathroom. A butler to take your coat."
The ridiculous idea of him hiring a butler just so someone could occasionally take your coat from you when you come over makes you laugh, which in turn puts a pleased smile on his face and accidentally encourages him to continue.
"What's that kids' movie you like? Twelve Dancing Princesses? What if I just repaint this room with the floor design from that?"
Now hang on. This one actually interests you, the idea of playing out your childhood fantasies out by dancing around in Rafayel's room. If you asked, you're sure he'd hire someone to replicate the same dress the main character from that movie wears too. "Wouldn't that be embarrassing? Anyone who comes here would see it."
"Yeah, something tells Thomas won't care. And if anyone else does come here, they'll probably write a boringly long article meant to flatter me. Renowned artist is super nice and generous to his childish girlfriend—"
"Says the guy who cried during Island Princess," you fire back, "also, it's nice to know you're only trying to spoil me for acclaim."
"Hello? Did you miss the part where I said boringly long? I'm trying to spoil you because I want you to spend my money."
"Why? It turns you on or something?"
"Maybe," he grins, pretending to lean in to kiss you, then sinking his teeth into your cheek once more the second you purse your lips to meet him halfway. With a quiet growl, you kick at his feet, and he only laughs against your skin. "Come oooon, I'm serious. Tell me at least one expensive thing I can get you."
Finally, you open your eyes, looking up at him with all your sincerest conviction. "Raf. If you wanna ruin your reputation and renovate your floor into the Twelve Dancing Princesses one just to prove a point, go for it. But I'm warning you, I'm gonna have to give you the best head of your life if you do that."
Rafayel groans, the hand that's not up your shirt tangling into your hair. "Don't tell me that, you're gonna force me to be selfless and turn it down. This isn't transactional. I give you my card and tell you to go wild, and then you just do it. Nothing in return."
Ah, yes, the Raf classic. Say the sweetest possible thing in the most irritating way he possibly can. Well, two can play at that game.
"If you give me your card and expect nothing in return, I'm going to strictly buy paint supplies in all your favorite brands, all your favorite colors—"
"I don't have favorite colors—"
Clamping a hand over his mouth, you press on. "And your weak attempt to spoil me will fall flat because not only will I only buy things you like, but I'll wire you the entire amount of what I spend the next day."
He lets out a dramatic half-whine, shaking you a little. "Man, you're so embarrassing!" Tugging you closer, he drowns out your complaints with his own protests. "So clingy, stop getting so close to me! Oh my god," he moans, holding your hand tighter the more you try to fight him and pull back, "get away from me, stalker. Let go!"
"Holy shit, you're so annoying—"
"And you're so obsessed with me, it's concerning."
For once, you're the one pouting at him. "I'm trying to sleep. You're really warm. Can you please push my limits later?"
An affectionate smile lights up his face. "Yeah, okay. As long as you agree tomebuyingyouapradabag."
"No."
Rafayel snorts, tucking his face into your hair. "And you think you could handle being a sugar baby."
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beddybites · 2 months ago
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hi friends! big rant incoming— i want to clarify this isnt targeted at anyone, im just noticing a pattern and im getting a little upset with some of the requests im being sent ):
something that really bothers me is the babyfication of giyuu tomioka. the fandom infantilizes the dude way too much. and its even worse when you throw shinobu into the mix and have her being a maternal figure to him when she herself is an eighteen year old who has worked as a hashira since she was a teenager. she does not need to be put into these situations where she’s taking care of her older peers all the time
i see this happen a lot and i feel its rooted in misogyny whether people recognize it or not. almost always the male characters are thrown into positions where the female character has to take care of them and its really frustrating
shinobu isnt a maternal character at all. to inosuke and the younger ones, it’s different, but if i keep seeing her being a mom to giyuu im actually going to lose my mind. giyuu isnt some uwu depressed baby who cant stand up for himself. he is just as mean as sanemi and obanai. he trained to survive and operate in horrible situations and fight for his life for years. hes a grown man and a hashira. he would not be babied by anyone, especially not someone who he has known since she was around fourteen years old
you may say “well ghostbite dont you do this with mitsuri and obanai”… sure. perhaps i am a hypocrite. but you must remember mitsuri is just sort of like that. she loves cute things and she loves fawning over everyone and everything. her scenes with nezuko. her introduction scene in the hashira meeting with her gushing over everyone. she hand feeds tanjiro pancakes in the recent season. she refers to people as “cutie.” etc etc etc
the difference with obanai and giyuu is obanai is often characterized as a yandere simp who is a huge bully to giyuu and tanjiro. he’s not. i like to put him in deaging situations a lot because unlike everyone else, he’s been through hell since birth. he’s never, not once, had a moment of peace. he had no siblings growing up to protect him— he had no loving parents, etc. he never felt love and he believes he is undeserving of it and should never reciprocate it. so here comes mitsuri, the epitome of love. he takes care of her. he watches after her. he is devoted to her. if something happens to him, especially if it’s a situation where he’s much smaller and weaker and in need of care, mitsuri would drop everything to help him. if it were mitsuri, obanai would do the same for her. it’s in both of their characters to do this. them being in these situations makes sense
i love shinobu. she would not. she does what a doctor does, looks for a cure, checks in here and there, and leaves it at that. she is not giyuu’s “mama.” she is an eighteen year old girl who has her own bucketload of issues. if you need her in a maternal role then use inosuke or literally any of the butterfly girls— the kids she actually takes in and takes care of. not her 21 year old coworker who is more than capable
if anything i think shinobu should be put in deaging situations. have giyuu take care of her instead. mix it up a little. but people are so attached to the idea of having every single caregiver role go to the woman that it’s unlikely we’ll see that
this is not a criticism on giyuu. i love giyuu. but i need people to stop treating him like a defenseless baby, and for people to quit seeing shinobu as responsible for him as a caregiver or a mother
tdlr: please stop asking me to draw or write deaged giyuu stuff. someone else can do that. i dont like deaged giyuu. tiny 21 trio is essentially on hold because of this ): i keep getting nonstop requests for deaged giyuu and im so tired, especially because people are framing it in a “you should replace obanai with giyuu” lens, or adding “mama shinobu doing x with baby giyuu”
it’s tiresome and frustrating. i love to make content for you guys, and i love when its something that appeals to you in a comforting way, but if you want specific content with giyuu— you’re very much in the wrong place. i hate the fandomification of him and shinobu— it makes me uncomfy and sad.
other people are deaging giyuu and putting him in situations— go ask them instead of me. i would rather highlight misunderstood and underrated characters like obanai and gyomei or my own personal faves (muichiro) then constantly loop the same exact character over and over again
all this to say im doubling down on the babybu and babynai and pintsized pillars aus. if you keep asking for baby giyuu and maternal figure shinobu my spite makes me stronger. hashtag let shinobu be taken care of for once. she’s already the doctor for an entire organization give my girl a break
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sixosix · 1 year ago
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can you do an aether x reader lil one shot please!!! my baby gets no love ;( I'm fine with any story or plot but maybe one where they've been travel buddies for a while and his feelings have just been bottled up over time and he just explodes in to a confession and then some cute fluff from there!!!!!!
a/n wc 1.6k there are tears in my eyes as i write this i love aether sonmuch. also sorry if this is all over the place i was trying so hard not to turn it into another 10k word fic…. ft. lyney
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aether doesn’t vividly recall the moment his feelings blossomed. there was no pinpointed moment, only all of it growing restless inside him.
he likes to keep his team to four people maximum, oftentimes none at all—just him and paimon to worry about as they move from region to region, friends made yet no proper strings attached. it’s for everyone’s sake, as aether doesn’t plan on staying too long in one place. that’s how it should’ve been.
you appeared one day, demanding to take you in his team. just for liyue and then you can separate ways, you said.
“i’m visiting my awfully quiet lover to break his silence. i need to figure out why i’ve stopped receiving letters,” you explained, blinding him with your bigger-than-life personality.
and because aether is a weak, weak man to people who don’t know how to back down, he agreed, albeit hesitantly. “alright,” he said in defeat. “just liyue?”
“just liyue,” you affirmed, beaming as he’s accepted you probably easier than you expected.
just liyue is a lie, and he should’ve known it the moment he had to confirm it. he didn’t bother with formal introductions and keeping conversations, knowing he wouldn’t see you again anyway. it didn’t help that paimon adores you, expressing her loud disappointment when you have to part ways with them.
paimon floated lower than usual. aether sighed. “should’ve known you’d grow to love someone who spoils you with sweet madame more than me.”
“hmph! y/n’s nicer to paimon than you!”
but he does see you again some time later, facing a large tree, kicking it out of frustration. it’s pouring heavily; your clothes are soaked.
“am i scary?” you asked when aether and paimon approached you, staring ahead, fists trembling.
“what’s wrong?! did something bad happen?” paimon fluttered around you nervously, unsure if she could touch you.
“he’s not dead, at least,” you said bitterly. “just too cowardly to tell me that he doesn’t love me anymore. i suppose it was better breaking up face-to-face than through letters.” you sighed bitterly, shoulders hiked up to your ears as a fresh wave of quiet tears washed over you, muted by the rain. “this is embarrassing, getting dumped because i was too much.”
“it’s not. you came all the way from mondstadt just to see him. didn’t he at least care about that?” aether asked, which might’ve just been his longest sentence yet. why were you out here soaking? if it were him, he wouldn’t have been so rude to leave you astray during a thunderstorm.
“i can’t force him, if he doesn’t want to see me. i’ll be alright, i promise.” you rest your forehead against the bark of the tree, water sliding off your cheeks—aether isn’t sure if it’s the rain or your tears.
he understands, possibly more than anyone.
and aether—still a weak, weak man when it came to people breaking down in front of him, knowing what it’s like to lose someone so dear to you—gently says, “xiangling told us there’s an event holding place here later. you’re coming with us.”
just liyue was already a warning in itself that it would never be just as that.
you weave yourself in his life as if you were always there, fitting in like you haven’t met him and paimon just a few days ago. he tries to convince himself that he’s doing this to cheer you up, but you’ve been making him smile more than they do to you.
he would turn to his side and see you feeding him a chicken-mushroom skewer after a short battle, insisting even when aether says he’s not as injured as you may think. he would turn to his side and see you and paimon laughing over something he missed and find himself grinning as well.
he would turn to his side when you tug on his sleeve, shyly asking if he’s willing to take you to inazuma as well because you didn’t want to stay in liyue if they weren’t here anymore.
“sure,” aether would say. he’s a weak man, and you were holding on to his cape, looking so adorable that aether wanted to melt on the spot. but that’s a normal reaction to cute things, probably.
taking you to inazuma turns into bringing you along to sumeru, then eventually fontaine, until everyone is convinced you’re a staple in aether’s adventures: aether, paimon, and y/n.
this is what it’s like to have a good team, aether persuades himself. a good team, a useful asset, aether reminds himself sternly as you slice a ruin cruiser off of existence with fierce anger in your eyes and a stick of tricolor dango in your mouth. you wave at him after, beaming, and his heart does something weird.
and now, when some of his friends suggest that he lays you off even just for a day so he can have three other people who work together seamlessly with him, he dismisses it quickly—without thinking. he already works best with you by his side. if they want to come along with him, they have to accept they’re coming along with you just as well.
“thanks for letting me join you,” you whisper one night, lying on the grass and watching the stars with him. you turn your head and meet his eyes, smiling softly.
“of course,” aether says. of course, because now he can’t imagine what it’s like to not have you with him. “i’m the only one who can handle how scary you are.”
you scoff, gently punching his arm as he laughs. “shut up, idiot. you know what i mean.”
i know, aether wants to say. but would that be too much? aether doesn’t want you to think he’s trying to replace someone important in your life this quickly.
you are scary. you’re terrifying him with all these unwanted feelings he doesn’t know what to do with. but aether wasn’t lying, either—he can handle fear just as well.
and now, as aether watches lyney grin and kiss the back of your palm, aether’s chest burns with something unpleasant, sitting in his stomach and urging him to take action. a rock under his shoe. he does not like it, not one bit.
“uhh,” paimon shifts nervously mid-air. “paimon thinks you should stop glaring daggers into lyney before he notices.”
“glaring daggers? i’m not glaring daggers,” aether hisses. his fingers are starting to ache with how painfully he’s clutching his sword. “no daggers here…” he curses as he watches you grow increasingly flustered.
the sight startles him. not your expression, not lyney’s clear provocation, but aether’s stance towards it.
“i thought we’re friends with lyney again?” paimon asks, terribly confused.
“the best of friends,” aether says, marching over to the scene. paimon makes a disbelieving noise.
lyney smirks knowingly as aether gently tugs on your arm. “oh,” lyney says, all sly, more of a fox than a cat, “i didn’t know you were already spoken for. i do apologize for the misunderstanding.”
you glance between an amused lyney and an irked aether, dazed. “i’m not…?”
“your jealous boyfriend says otherwise,” lyney snorts as aether bristles.
aether glares heatedly at lyney, even as the latter backs away with a smug grin. “y/n, let’s go. there’s nothing else to do here.” he’s being rude. he doesn’t care. his mind is blank—or maybe it’s running miles per minute, and he struggles to keep up.
and because you always listen to aether, you let him drag you off, nearly failing to wave goodbye to a chuckling lyney. lyney calls for paimon, distracting her as aether continues walking away from the scene.
you turn to aether, barely able to keep up with his hurried steps. “whoa, whoa, hey, aether—aether, are you okay? your face is so red.” you touch his cheek, and he crumbles. “aether.”
he halts, frowning at the ground. frustrated.
“aether, is there something wrong?”
that’s the thing. aether doesn’t know what’s wrong. he was content with watching you from afar—content with your stars slowly aligning with his as he stands back and watches it happen. he was content with not doing anything about it. but not doing anything about it would mean everyone else thinks you haven’t got aether wrapped around your finger.
“sorry,” aether says. to the painful beating of his heart, restless with unexplained fury. “i didn’t—”
“…idiot.” you always tell him that. you’re the only one who calls him that, but he knows that were they to try, he wouldn’t let it slide so easily. “it’s okay to admit you’re jealous. it’s cute.”
it is not lyney’s flirtations that tip aether over; it’s the sweet smile you give him, the gentleness of your gaze, and your face so close to aether’s that you and him share the same breath. what tips him over is all of it crashing down on him, as daunting as a fight, as abrupt as the beat of his heart:
oh. oh. is that it?
aether doesn’t vividly recall the moment you wormed your way in. maybe it was the moment you jumped down from a tree branch and scared the wits out of paimon, only to demand nervously he take you. maybe it was the moment he softens when your shoulders shake and rain pours relentlessly overhead. maybe it was the stab of jealousy seeing someone else try to steal you away from him when you so obviously belong to him as he belongs to you.
it doesn’t matter.
“i want you,” aether says, then blinks when you do a startled take. “no—no. i mean. i… like you. and i want you to stay. here. not with them. not anyone else.”
“stay right in front of you?”
“in front, beside—doesn’t matter.” aether grows weak, limp as he presses his forehead against yours. “i just want you.”
“okay,” you smile, tipping your chin to kiss his cheek. his heart soars. “that’s all i needed to hear.”
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damn-stark · 6 months ago
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Chapter 9 Pure as The Driven Snow
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Chapter 9 of Moonlight
A/N- We’re back with new chapters! I hope you guys like it. I got real nervous writing this. I don't know why! Also is it a sign that your dragon likes your lover more than your husband?
Warning- some swearing, talks of pregnancy, Angst!, fluff, hunting SPOILERS, LONG CHAPTER.
Pairing- Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon!fem-reader, Cregan Stark x Velaryon!fem-reader
Episode- After 1x10 & before 2x01
(If you want to be tagged let me know)
————
*A FEW MONTHS AGO*
“Dragon fruit for the dragon Princess?”
“Pearl necklace for the Siren of Driftmark?”
“Oranges? They are good for a growing babe.”
You touch your 6-month-old swollen belly and come to another stop in front of a stand to study the big round oranges stacked so neatly on the crates.
“How much?” You ask the vendor.
The man puts his hands on his hips and studies his fruit for a moment before facing you. “Discount for you Princess. 5 Silver dragons.”
You glance at Aemond, and he makes his hesitation known before handing you your pouch of money. He doesn’t find this trip necessary, he says that whatever you want can be brought to you right away, especially because you’re with child, but, being stuck in the same rooms all day is torture! You told him the baby and you would go mad while batting your eyelashes really sweetly and he hesitantly accepted without a fight.
“I’ll give you 10 golden dragons instead of silver,” you tell the vendor as you get out the golden coins that make the man’s eyes almost pop out of eyes. “Find good use for it.”
The man shares a nervous laugh and takes the money, but holds your hand before he steps away and bows his head. “Thank you, Princess. Thank you, may the gods bless you and yours.”
You offer him a kind smile, and then gently pull away to pick the oranges, but he suddenly blocks the oranges with his hands. “No, these are no good. I have perfect ones. Juicy and sweet.”
He crouches and pulls out a box from under the table and hands it to you. Albeit before you can even reach for it, Ser Criston takes the box for you.
“Have a nice day, sir,” you direct at the man before you continue down the street lively with people.
“<He ripped you off you know,>” Aemond grumbles in High Valyrian so the people around you wouldn’t understand him.
You scoff softly and hook your arm around his. “In Winterfell, Lady Arra, and Lord Stark treated their people like they were friends and they got respect.” You sigh and shrug gently. “Of course, I know not everyone has good intentions, but Lord Stark taught me how to read people. I try to use his advice when talking to people here, it is why I know this guy was no trickster.”
Aemond hums in comprehension but doesn’t actually agree or take in what you said. You may be down amongst the people, but he’s in the clouds where he’s untouchable. The only thing that matters is your mention of Lord Stark.
“You and Lord Stark are close friends?”
You don’t remove your hand from his arm even if you’re tempted to, you don’t let your eyes flicker even if you have the burning need to look away to hide the truth. You keep the faint smile that decorates your features and keep looking around. “Well considering I lived in Winterfell for five years, yes, we are good friends. Or were.”
“You don’t write?” He probes and keeps his focus on you to try and watch for anything that might give you away. “You often get letters from Winterfell.”
There’s no excuse for a lingering silence, you can’t breathe a certain way because he’s paying close attention, so you turn your head to meet his gaze and share your rehearsed lie. “Sometimes, but I talk to someone else. A lady friend that lives in the castle. One of late Lady Arra’s friends.”
Aemond holds your gaze and tries to pick up on something just a hair out of place, but you keep composed well and he goes unaware once again, letting you let out a small breath and smile with relief.
“I won’t go poor by giving these people something extra. Bless them and the gods bless you. Lady Stark would say that.” You return the subject to what you were previously talking about. “Besides I actually got a craving for oranges. Or the babe did.” You grin and touch your belly again, feeling a small movement now that makes you giddy.
“Feel,” you beckon Aemond and snatch his hand from his side to press it against your small belly. “He’s moving.”
Aemond comes to a stop in the middle of the street and caresses your belly very gently, letting you watch his blue eye soften, and those thin lips show a faint smile.
And since it took him no time to show his affection or his bliss you can’t help but grin in awe before you slide his hand to the other side. “See?” You interject softly. “He wants oranges.”
A wider smile tugs on Aemond’s face before he takes your hand again and continues to walk with you down the street.
“You do not know that it is a boy,” he likes to remind you.
You giggle. “I do. It’s an instinct. When I imagine the babe I see a boy. Always. We will have a boy. I’ll even bet you.”
Aemond scoffs and smirks. “You can place your bets with Aegon. He never turns down the chance to gamble. I believe you.”
“Good,” you grin. “Now I wonder how many kids we will have, six? I want a big family. But if I can’t have so many I will be content with two, but we need to have a baby girl.”
“So you can name her Daenys?” Aemond finishes for you, making you look at him with awe.
“You remember?” You probe.
A small smirk spreads on his lips and he nods. “I do. You’d only bore me with stories about her.”
You roll your eyes. “I wouldn’t bore you. You’d bring me the books!”
“Because it was your favorite,” he counters softly.
You laugh softly and nod. “It still is. Maybe our Daenys will be an amazing dreamer just like the great legend that saved our house.”
“Yes,” he agrees with an obvious glee in his voice. “Maybe.”
You let out a content sigh and rest your head on his shoulder while you take in the stands you pass.
“Spare some food? Money?” A child with his face covered in dirt asks. “Something small?”
“<He just wants to steal from you, they always have money.>” Aemond points out.
Even if he did, you don’t care, you stop and turn to pick out an orange off the box.
The kids' eyes grow curious, and they follow your hand as you move it towards him. You pretend you’re going to give him a single orange, but you then hand it to Aemond and instead grab the box from Ser Criston’s hold.
“Take it,” you tell the kid. “It’s for you.”
You put the box down in front of him and offer him a smile before you move on. This time Aemond doesn’t remark on your actions—you wouldn't care either way, so he just lets it pass and takes your hand in his again so you wouldn’t wander off just as you approach the outer castle gates.
However, before you can cross the courtyard, a woman with a bright red dress walks out of her house and announces something that steals your immediate attention. “Wish to know your future, my Princess?”
“Princess,” Ser Criston immediately interjects. “She’s only trying to take your money. It’s a scam. Leave it.”
You flick your wrist down and take the money pouch from Aemond’s side.
“Your worry is misplaced, Ser,” the pretty lady with beautiful and remarkable colored eyes cuts in. “But I understand. Patience is a fickle thing is it not, Ser Criston Cole? If only you had known it, you would be happy now.” Her eyes dart to you and then go back to him quickly as if trying to point something out.
You don’t read into it, or demand an explanation, you let her continue as she looks between all three of you. “I am a humble servant of the Lord of Light,” she rebuttals, “I only mean to give the Princess insight for her eyes are covered and her soul is basked by darkness.”
You smile at her eagerly and let Aemond go to step towards her. “What is your name?” You ask first.
The woman's bright eyes meet yours and her lips tug upward just slightly. “I am Kinvara, Priestess of the Lord of Light.”
Your name passes Aemond’s lips, but you disregard his warning and the priestess tries to ease Aemond’s worry in your mother tongue. “<I am no one to fear, fear resides in the whispers that are heard in the shadows, and from the lips of pretenders,” she pauses and narrows her eyes on him. “You see clearly with her at your side, venture too far and you're left blind. Don’t let the shadows consume you, My Prince, or darkness is all you’ll know.>”
You glance at him and grin brightly before facing her again. “Now can you tell me what I seek?” You press impatiently.
Kinvara turns and walks inside, speechlessly motioning you to follow, but before you can you face Aemond first. “Wait for me out here,” you tell him.
Aemond shoots you a pointed glare and grabs your arm. “Let’s go. This is all fake. She will take your money.”
You pat his cheek and give him one last piece of reassurance. “She can try but she’ll never steal my riches,” you quip. “I’ll be fine, it’s just for fun.”
You shoot him a small smile and then lean in to kiss his cheek before you follow after the Red Priestess, finding a single fire lit on a golden bowl in the middle of the elegant parlor room.
“How much will it cost?” You ask her as you slowly wander to the stand holding the bowl.
“Nothing but your attention,” she shares in a soothing voice. “And a drop of your blood.”
You stop before the bowl and don’t question offering her your hand even if you should, and Kinvara doesn't make it any harder. She’s quick and doesn’t hesitate picking out a single thin needle before gently cupping your hand and poking the sharp end on the pad of your thumb.
When a scarlet drop of blood crawls out of the small wound she pulls your hand over the flames and turns it to face the flames. After the single drop of blood falls in the flames she lets your hand go and throws the needle in the flames to let the fire eat away at it.
“You have fire-made flesh, a gift from the Lord of Light,” she begins to say bluntly.
You would’ve liked to be eased into it, but you’re no expert so you clasp your hands over your belly and watch her eyes read the dancing flames with curiosity.
“You have salt-littered blood and a dragon-made soul that burns fiercely and passionately; she flies high within the clouds in search of something…” she lets the words slip out as if she was chanting a spell, and then meets your gaze across the flames.
You should be intimidated, but you’re just eager to know more.
“…three hearts,” Kinvara adds. “One made of ice, two of fire. Three soul made dragons…”
Three, huh?
“…and loyalty.”
It’s hard to piece anything together but you still can’t help but feel joy, and an overwhelming curiosity that pushes you to pick at one thing that caught your attention. “Three soul-made dragons? Does it mean I’ll have three kids?”
Kinvara smiles sweetly. “Smart girl, but you’ll have seven. The three I see will grow, they’ll know happiness and long lives.” She hums and blinks whilst her smile fades to a smirk. “But sins will burden them and cast over them like shadows.”
Right away your smile fades and for the first time since you saw her, fear begins to crawl across your mind. “What…does that mean?” You ask quietly.
The red priestess lifts her chin and sighs. “You’ll know.”
How insightful.
“One more thing,” she interjects and moves away from her spot to reach you and grab your hands “Fire kills the girl and awakens the dragon. Follow the flames for they are sweet to you since the moment your right was taken.”
You let out a deep breath and nod stiffly. You don’t understand completely, or at all actually, but you nod in comprehension before you just feed one more piece of curiosity. “Could I read the flames as well?”
Kinvara moves back across the flames and points her chin to the fire, encouraging you to try and read what the flames could tell you.
“You might not see your own future, remember that. If you see anything it will only be glimpses,” she lets you know while you step forward and focus your eyes on the bright flames seeming to lure you in; but not like every other time before, this calling is different now, you don’t have the urge to touch the flames or bathe yourself in their fierce beauty.
What calls you now are whispers; unclear, but trying to make sense in their own way.
“Listen,” Kinvara says as if can read your mind. “And open your eyes.”
She can’t mean your actual eyes because those are already open, she must mean it metaphorically or whatever, and as difficult as it seems you draw out a deep breath and focus on nothing else but the dancing flames; you don’t let Aemond come to mind, nor do you think about what was told to you, you narrow your gaze slightly and watch in silence.
After a few moments, you start to grow irritated, but suddenly before that frustration breaks your focus you freeze and catch your breath when you see snow falling. It’s clear as day as if you’re living through what you see.
Something falls with the snow though, something thicker and different in color. It’s slightly intoxicating and brings a stench of fire and smoke with it.
You have the urge to dive deeper to figure out what you see, but the scene changes to more white plains covered in snow, ashes, and bones, and above it stands a woman with silver hair. She stands above it all while a winter storm descends upon her. You see her start to turn her head but before you can make out her face, fire is all you see.
“<A long winter.> Kinvara breaks the silence and pulls your attention back to her.
“<Yes,>” you respond in High Valyrian as it actually makes sense.
The priestess offers you a smile and walks to the door. “It was a pleasure meeting you. I’ll see you again.”
You’re left in so much disbelief that you don’t question what she means by “I’ll see you again.”, you bid her a farewell and return to Aemond.
“I was about to barge in there,” Aemond says in a rush.
You blink repeatedly and meet his gaze with your disbelief still clinging to your features. Aemond notices and grabs your shoulders.
“What is it? What did she do?” He hisses.
You draw out a deep breath and with that push away all your disbelief to not worry him over something that’s not clear.
“Nothing, she simply told me we’ll have seven kids,” you share the only thing that was clear.
Aemond scoffs in disbelief but he leaves it at that. Just as you do.
——
*NOW. WINTERFELL*
When you think of home, Aerion, your mother, and your brothers are what you picture in your mind. They are your home, it doesn’t matter the place, as long as they’re with you that’s what you call home.
But oftentimes, when the word home comes up, when you think about home sometimes you picture these tall grey walls, you see these snow-covered hills, the white skies that stretch for miles and bring icy winds and delicate and beautiful snow. You see grey eyes and a timid smile. You remember the warmth from all the fires lit all day and the warmth his body provides. You think of home and someone who isn’t your husband is all you see. You try to fight it, but your longing is stronger than your will.
Now as you stand in these snowy planes and feel this instant comfort fill your heart all you can think about is how dangerous it is.
You were too hasty to make your suggestion and climb your dragon. You’re only steps away and as heart racing as it is, you also can’t help but strain your heart with anxiety as well.
Letters are completely different than seeing face to face again than feeling his hand grab yours and feeling his lips brush your knuckles. Jacaerys is here but will that stop your deep desires? Will that stop him from being mad at you for being distant and not writing to him anymore? Will that stop that tension?
But why is it that a problem?! You’re married! And you love Aemond, he’s your home too; him and Aerion are your family. A family you built after being apart from your own, and even if you have this new strain, you still want to fix it, you still want to fight for Aemond and your family. You have to be strong for them. You can’t give in to what feels comfortable and what your heart might cry for. You have to be strong. You have to be friends and nothing more.
“It’s snowing,” Jacerys muses as he reaches for a snowflake. “I honestly thought there would be more.”
You glance at the open gates and already imagine him waiting in that courtyard in front of his staff, family, and friends. It’s impossible to ignore two dragons descending in front of your home after hearing about an impending war and a call for a declaration from the Greens.
“It’s a lot colder than I thought it would be down here,” Jacaerys adds to his rambling. “How did you ever do it?”
“Well we are in the North,” you mutter unaware of your tone.
“Oh, no need to get snippy, I know where we are,” your brother remarks.
You sigh and turn to him. “Sorry,” you admit. “It's just what if he says no? It’s almost winter, his people need him here. And what would he gain from supporting one or the other, he could just decide to remain neutral.”
Jacaerys leans forward and tries to be assertive. “He’ll gain the Queen's lifelong gratitude, and a chance to prove his loyalty…he’s a Stark, you know that, they take pride in their loyalty. I don’t see why he’ll turn us away. Do you?”
No, but that’s not really why you’re worried, in one form or the other you just needed to be assured.
“I see your point,” you tell him.
Jacaerys gaze lingers on you to be an assuring brother for a moment longer before it’s time to break away from your running thoughts and growing panic and face Cregan with your head held up high, and a fierce determination on your face.
Yet when you walk past those main gates, that fierce determination is met with inklings of worry. Your head is high, but it’s practiced, it’s years of practice, there's a tension on your shoulders, and your breathing is slightly hitched because of your racing heart making your lungs work overtime.
You try to show your confidence in your stride, you are the Queen's daughter after all, but the closer you get to that courtyard the more you hide behind Jacaerys, as if that will help you avoid anything you’re about to face.
If someone were to guess, they’d say it’s your first time here with the way you’re cowering behind your brother and letting him carry all the confidence and pride for you both, but it’s not. As you trail behind your brother, some people you pass by actually recognize you.
You are Winterfell's luminous sun after all, the warmth and light in the darkest winter storm and lightest snow days, capable of melting the most stubborn ice. To their Lord though you are much more and it’s been easy to notice since the moment your purple dragon was seen. You are the reason he smiles, and the sun that gleams in his grey eyes.
But like the sun you hide. You finally make it to the main courtyard but Jacaerys is the first one seen and almost the only one they can see. You don’t want to come out of hiding because you don’t want to see him.
Your heart is pumping so fast, and your hands are trembling. You can almost feel a tightness grab ahold of your chest.
“Jacaerys,” you call out in a quiet panic.
Said man turns and when he does he uses his whole body to move away from you, in that moment leaving a clear and open view of none other than Cregan Stark. There he stands, tall, proud, and mighty. Grey eyes bright and soft even against his hardened gaze. His pink lips form into the faintest smile that you notice right away because you can’t help it, everyone and everything disappears, leaving only him and you in the snow-covered courtyard.
Not even your initial panic exists anymore, it melts away, and your body eases with a simple look into his familiar eyes. Your once-racing heart slows down, but now flutters and skips a beat, and you can’t stop it. Just like he can’t help himself because here you are again, across from him with light snow perfectly raining over you, eyes so deep and captivating that he loses himself within with ease. Your face is basked by a gleam of light that makes you so much more divine, and a heartwarming smile decorates your perfectly sculpted lips.
Now he knows composure, he knows his place, but in this small escape where only you and him exist, it’s costing everything within him not to break away and capture your lips with his. He just wants to grab and kiss you, but your trance is broken by the sound of your name being announced followed by your house.
“…of House Velaryon, wife of Aemond Targaryen.” And then there's that ridiculous reminder that you are not his anymore.
Luckily that cruel reminder is not with you, instead, there’s another, smaller in stature, but still standing tall and mighty with gold dragon emblems on his belt and on his cloaks broach. He proudly wears the colors black and red which shows who he is without the need of an introduction.
“Prince Jacaerys, of house Velaryon,” the guard still announces the man you’re accompanied with.
“My Prince, my Princess,” Cregan speaks in that thick northern accent that makes your heart swoon. “Welcome to Winterfell.” He bows his head, and the crowd behind him mirrors him.
When he raises his head again and stands tall the first thing he does is meet your gaze. You should glance away and share why you’re here, but you part your lips and only a soft breath comes out as you hold his gaze.
“It’s a pleasure to have you back, Princess,” Cregan addresses you formally, hiding away the history you share. “The North has missed you.”
Your cheeks grow warm, and your lips form a flattered smile before you announce it. “You flatter me, My Lord. I have missed the North, and the snow as well.”
He huffs in amusement and spares a glance at the falling snow. “Well you’re lucky then, it just started to snow. It seems you brought a late summer snow with you.”
You share a breathless giggle, and his eyes share his awe.
“My Lord,” Jacaerys cuts in and reminds you he’s here too.
“Oh right,” you cut in and look at your brother, seeing his eyebrows furrow as he looks at you and then glances at Cregan. You ignore him and grab his arm to go on proudly. “Lord Stark, my brother, and my mother's heir, Jacaerys Velaryon.” You share what he was already told, but it feels right to introduce him yourself again. “Jacaerys, this is Lord Cregan Stark.”
“It's a pleasure, my prince, welcome to the North,” Cregan addresses him kindly, making you smile. “Your sister has told me many tales about you. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”
Your brother bows his head. “Likewise, my sister speaks fondly of her stay here too.”
Cregan glances at you and the corner of his lips twitch ever so slightly.
“I do wish I was here under better circumstances to have some of that fun my sister always goes on about,” Jacaerys starts to get to the point, leaving no time to wander. But that’s good, you are here on business, you can’t forget that.
“But unfortunately we are here under orders of the Queen Rhaenyra Targaryen,” Jacaerys proclaims, making the crowd murmur as the whispers they’ve heard are finally confirmed.
Cregan nods stiffly and glances back at his great hall just behind him. “I assumed so,” he says and looks back at Jacaerys and you. “Let’s go talk inside. I’m sure this change of weather is not so agreeable for southerners used to warm summers.”
Jacaerys scoffs softly and nods before he follows Cregan’s lead unaware of the fact that he’s leaving you behind as you’re stopped by some people in the crowd.
“Princess,” a thin middle-aged man who works inside the castle greets you and steals your attention.
“Good sir, John,” you greet him with a smile. “How is your daughter?” You ask as you remember how she had been when you left.
The man nods eagerly and smiles in return. “Very well, my princess. Healthy and strong. The gods let her survive her fever,” he shares and points behind you. You follow his line of gaze and see his daughter in a tall tower watching what you can only assume are the dragons in the distance.
“I told you she’s strong,” you tell him with genuine relief.
“Princess,” one of the cooks addresses you, making you turn to her and smile.
“Ms Maribell,” you turn your attention to her. “I’m glad to see you.”
“And you,” she returns sweetly. “I hear you have a son, where is he now? Why didn’t you bring him?”
You nod. “Yes,” you share excitedly and touch your chest. “Aerion. He’s four months old, but sadly I had to leave him behind with my mother, what I’m out here doing is no place for children I’m afraid. But I do want to bring him after these affairs are in order.”
“When you do, stop by here,” she suggests. “I’m sure he’ll love Winterfell as much as you did.”
You grin and nod, but before you can add more to your friendly conversation, your name cuts through the icy breeze. You look over and see your brother with a pressing look.
“My brother beckons me, I’ll see you all later,” you excuse yourself and offer them a small head bow before you stride to your brother and take his arm.
“<We are not here for a friendly visit,” he whispers sharply in High Valyrian. “I know your history here, but please stay focused.>”
You sigh and look ahead, catching Cregan’s vigilant gaze focused on you after he, unbeknownst to you, watched you interact with his people and treated them like they were your long-lost friends. It honestly fills his heart with a warmth that makes his grey eyes gleam with a joy that you easily notice against his nonchalant expression while he waits for you and your brother.
Since he so often wears a hardened expression on his face it’s hard to know what he feels, but after five years you learned how to read him like a soulmate reads its other half without a need for words. Yet you don't know the exact reason why he was so touched.
“Forgive our delay,” Jacaerys instantly brings up like a proper Prince. “My sister is easily distracted.”
Cregan lets you walk in the great hall first and once the doors close behind him he huffs and responds. “Yes, I remember, so do not worry, my Prince.”
You glance at your brother and pass him a teasing look. He meets your gaze and shoots you a warning glare before he brings you both to a stop just under Lord Stark’s throne.
“I hope the northern winds weren’t too harsh,” Cregan addresses while he walks to his chair.
“Well they were colder the closer we got to Winterfell, but they helped our dragons pick up speed to deliver this message from Queen Rhaenyra Targaryen,” Jacaerys makes a quick workaround to why you’re here.
“Just last night I received an envoy from your uncle who calls himself King as well,” Cregan says as he takes the sealed scroll from Jacaerys.
“No, you got an envoy from a Usurper,” you immediately correct him. “The true ruler is the one the late King Viserys appointed as his heir, Queen Rhaenyra. That never changed nor was it his will for it to change after his death.”
Cregan glances at you and stares at you in silence for a moment as he processes your words before he finally opens the scroll and reads what was written.
“Your father bent the knee to Queen Rhaenyra when she was named heir, and swore that House Stark and the North will follow the line of succession,” Jacaerys adds to the point to try and further convince Cregan. “Now Queen Rhaenyra’s throne was stolen and demands you follow your father's path and stand proudly in support of her rule and war if it arises.”
You have seen so little of your brother's political side since you were reunited, so now that you see it you can’t help but be in awe of the man standing tall beside you, proving himself a worthy heir.
“Your words move me,” Cregan finally interjects as he lowers the scroll to look at Jacaerys and you. “And your presence honors me. Winterfell is almost at the edge of the world, but you still came to deliver this in your mother's regard,” he says and makes some of that tension release from Jacaerys shoulders. “I know of my father's oath to your Queen. I also know how deep disloyalty cuts when it’s made by one’s own kin, your sister was here to witness my uncle usurping my rightful place as Lord…which is why I do not intend to break oath today. The North will not break oath today,” Cregan proclaims confidently and with no falter, relieving your brother of his worry, but not yours.
“But,” Cregan proves your worry worthwhile. “Winter is coming my Prince, my Princess. And these seem almost like family affairs. The Queen has my loyalty, but why should we support this war? My priorities are with my people and providing for them before Winter arrives.”
You and Jacaerys share a conflicted look, but neither of you are stuck on what to say, you're just debating who should speak in your defense. You with an advantage, or Jacaerys with a blunt but respectful tongue?
Honestly, you both probably have great points, but in your speechless exchange, Jacaerys trusts you.
“I understand,” you argue and step forward, gaining all of Cregan’s attention. “I have not lived a true winter, but I understand your hesitance, My Lord. I understand your people need you now more than ever, but the Greens have an advantage, that’s something we can admit, and they will not be afraid to use it against you, and your Queen. They already steal from her, will you stand to see them take more? Will you stand and see your people and lands burnt? Will you sit and do nothing as injustice is acted upon your Queen? Or will you and your people fight for what’s right, and for the greater or good of the North?”
Cregan shifts in his seat and keeps his hardened gaze on you for a long and tense silence. You could read what he might be thinking, but you look at your brother and fall back by his side to wait for a response.
“Your words move me,” Cregan interjects with a small huff. “And leave me a lot to think about. I hope you understand my choice will not be taken lightly, I must speak with my own people on these matters, just be assured that the North supports the rightful Queen.”
Cregan stands from his seat and Jacaerys steps forward to cut in. “How long will we have to wait?”
Cregan raises his chin. “Soon, I swear,” he promises. “As for now, you must be tired from your travel. Baths will be drawn in your quarters, and supper will be served shortly in this hall.”
You draw in a deep breath and much to your surprise you’re the one who grows impatient instead of Jacaerys. “Thank you, My Lord Stark,” you deadpan and bow your head.
Said man catches your tone before the change on your face, but says nothing on the matter. Instead, he walks down and points to the door that leads to your apartments.
Yet before you can make any attempt to walk out, the doors open and a servant carrying a dark-haired child walks in, and without as much as insight to clue you in, you know who the child is right away, you can see it in his familiar dark eyes, and that kind resting face.
“Oh gods,” you muse excitedly and lose all your annoyance in the blink of an eye. “Is this baby Rickon?” You direct at Cregan.
“Yes, this is my boy,” he assures you and you don’t wait for the wet nurse to come to you, you meet her halfway.
“Jacaerys,” you exclaim as you grab the child’s hand with a bright grin. “I helped deliver this child!” You squeal and turn back to the baby.
“I believe it,” your brother mutters.
“Hello little Lord,” you greet the baby a bit too excited. “Look at you, you look like your mother…May I?” You direct at the wet nurse, and she doesn’t hesitate to hand you the child who is a mirror of Arra.
“Hello,” you greet him again a lot softer this time since he looks at you puzzled. “I know you don’t remember me, but I remember you. How old are you now? 1?”
You don’t expect an answer, but the baby does. “Hello.”
You beam at him and caress his head while you share a happy look at Cregan. “I can’t believe it. Words truly aren’t enough, Rickon is so big. I’m so proud.”
“He would’ve been out to greet you but you caught him in his naptime,” he says and steps towards you but keeps his distance.
“He looks like his mother,” you tell him and look back at Rickon, catching him taking the pearls around your neck. “Ah, yes, nice huh?”
“Hello,” he says again, making you laugh and turn to start heading to your quarters with the others trailing behind you. “My Aerion likes my jewelry too,” you tell him. “But he likes to suck on it. You just like to look at it, hm?”
“I reckon this little lord is a lot kinder than your Aerion,” Jacaerys teases as he falls by your side.
You roll your eyes at your brother and reassure Rickon. “Don't listen to him. He’s just mad because Aerion can sense his impatience. He’s very sweet, and I’m sure when he’s older you’ll be great friends. I’ll make sure of it.”
The baby is unbothered by what you say, but you couldn’t be more happier than to see Cregan and your friend's child. He reminds you of Arra, and when you think of Arra you think of where you are, and when you think of where you are all you feel is that comfort embracing you harder, consuming you little by little.
Which is dangerous, you know. The longer you stay here the more you let yourself get consumed by what’s familiar and kind that the reality in the distance becomes easy to forget.
But you can’t. You can’t let yourself feel complete comfort or you’ll run the risk of falling into the temptation you long for the most. Thus when you finish your bath you don’t linger in your borrowed quarters, nor do you explore what you left behind out of curiosity to see what’s new, you act as if you’ll be leaving any minute and visit where Arra was put to rest.
Yet that temptation finds you there and puts it all at risk. You don’t know about his looming presence until you turn away from Arra’s tomb.
“Lord Stark,” you gasp.
Cregan bows his head. “Forgive me I did not mean to startle you, I did not want to interrupt your moment that's all.”
You laugh nervously and glance back at Arra’s tomb. “If I did not visit her while I was here she would haunt me.”
Cregan hums and you stop avoiding his gaze to look into his grey eyes.
You had hoped to contain yourself, but in the silence that falls as you just look at one another, you can’t contain your joy, it takes over you and before you know it you’re beaming like a shining sun and striding over to him.
Cregan gives in the moment you break and meets you halfway with a tight and warm embrace.
“I had come to terms with not seeing you again,” Cregan breaks the silence first as he holds onto you.
“Me too. I really did not think I would see you again,” you murmur excitedly and hold on for longer than either of you wanted to. You just can’t seem to let go even if there's a shared silence in which you keep in words that you both are aching to say and just add tension.
“I…I’m happy to see you again,” he says instead and pulls back to face you
“You grew out your hair,” you point out to change the subject. “You said long hair was for barbarians.”
Cregan chuckles, and you smirk. “Well, I thought I could try it out,” he says. “And it keeps my neck warm.”
You study his brown hair that falls just above his shoulders and let yourself have this one thing. “I like it. It suits you well.”
Cregan offers you a thankful nod and takes this time to study you closely again. “You seem happier this time around,” he points out.
You scoff. “What are you saying? Did I look miserable when I got here six years ago?” You tease lightheartedly.
Cregan nods. “Yes. You did. This time you look happy though.”
You sigh and glance at the exit as if you’d see your brother. “Yes, well my brother is here. As annoying as he can be, I am happy he came with me.”
“Mhm.”
You smile softly in response and to avoid staring too long into his eyes you start to walk out. But for a few seconds as you walk aimlessly there’s a silence that lingers until he finds what to say. “Arra’s friend came to see me a few days after you left.”
You glance at him with a curious gaze and probe. “Why?”
He exhales deeply and confides in you what he hasn't had the heart to share in letters. “She came to blame me for her death. She said I was the reason she died.”
You come to an immediate halt, and he follows suit and slowly turns to face your sorrowful face.
“She was hurt, Cregan. It was not your fault. She was just grieving,” you try to comfort him even if he didn’t ask for it because you know how much guilt he already carries for Arra’s death and because you can't stand hearing him blame himself.
“Well, there is some truth to it is there not?” He says breathily and averts his gaze.
You draw in a deep breath and reach out, but before you can touch his arm you clasp your hands and fiddle with your ring. “No. There is not,” you say firmly. “Childbirth is not easy. I hate to admit it but her loss is common. It cannot be helped, so no it is not your fault. Arra’s friend was just grieving the woman she loved.”
Cregan blinks and meets your gaze with gratitude behind his perked lips but hesitation in his grey eyes. You don’t think he’s going to say anything and leave it as him just processing what you said, but as you continue walking side by side he finally interjects hesitantly.
“Your son…how is he?” He asks as if it pains him to actually ask.
You smile proudly. “Good. Spoiled endlessly by all the love my mother is giving him, but he’s good,” you muse. “I wish you could have met him.”
Cregan swallows thickly and finds it in himself to speak. “I wish I could have seen him too, I am sure he looks like you.”
You meet his gaze briefly and nod with glee.
There's so much you can say at this moment, but there’s also so much you can’t say that you end up in this battle of not knowing what you should do. Should you touch into this past that you need to keep closed? Or leave it all unspoken and just filled with tension that threatens to overflow and break you both?
No one would have to know. You could speak about this unspoken past you both cherish…But! Then you think of Aerion, and when you think of your son, you think of his father and once again, you still want to fight for this relationship even if you stand on opposite sides now.
Thus you leave it untouched and just lean towards something else.
However, when you speak Cregan’s name to address something else he also speaks your name, leaving you at a crossroads he luckily lets you cross first. “About why I came—”
“Did you come to sweet talk me, princess?” He cuts in and does assume right, but that’s not what you’re going to say.
“Maybe,” you laugh breathlessly and exhale deeply to get at what you want to say. “But look, I understand you’re needed here, your people are your priority. Winter is dangerous, which is why we won’t ask for a lot. We’re proud and honored to get your loyalty, but anything you can spare will help. We may have more dragons, but they lack experience in war, unlike Vhagar.”
Cregan nods in comprehension and does assure you honestly. “I meant when I said I’ll try. I want to help the Queen, I swear. Let me just see what I can spare, winter is not friendly, winter is cruel, you know that.”
More than most…and more than he knows…
“I know.” You agree softly. “How long will that take?”
He sighs and shrugs. “A couple of days. Not long. Why are you in a hurry?”
You drag your gaze over to pass him a knowing glance because he knows that your presence means much more than anyone knows, and it brings risks.
Still, he smirks faintly at you.
“I will say,” you admit and smile at him. “I am glad to be back in the North. I missed it. It’s so loud in Kings Landing compared to here. And the view from my chambers?!” You exclaim without a care in the world. “Over there it’s busy streets, and here it’s serene hills.”
Cregan chuckles softly. “I told you there’s no place for you so far South anymore. You bring your son here and it is over for you.”
You laugh and nod. “I do love the sun though, and a sea in which I can swim in!” You nudge his arm, and he leans to the side with a smile.
“I will bring the warm sea here, I told you.”
You snort and shake your head. “While I'm here we need to show Jacaerys some of the fun we would have. I want him to see some part of Winterfell before we leave.”
Of course, Cregan doesn’t argue, he gives in but when he meets your gaze from the corner of his eyes he grows sweet and smug. “Not all the fun though?”
You hold his gaze and shake your head. “No. Not all the fun.”
He hums and looks at you with a dangerous longing look that you quickly look away from.
“Ice fishing?” You suggest.
“You have an entire day to waste?” He brings up and clears his throat.
You hum in agreement and stroke your chin, unaware of the fact that you’re being walked into the great hall.
“Owl hunting?” Cregan teases in that stern nonchalance, and you can’t help but burst out laughing as you remember what he means by that.
“You think you’re funny huh?”
“You just laughed.”
You shake your head and grab his arm to laugh more and much harder.
“I can’t believe you fell for it the first time.” He keeps taunting you.
You stand tall and throw out an excuse. “I was young.”
Cregan looks at you with his eyebrows furrowed and you look at him and laugh again, unaware of how lost you were until you hear your brother.
“Sister. Where have you been? I’ve been looking for you.”
You blink repeatedly and catch your breath before you point back at where you came from. “I visited a friend, Arra, remember? I needed to go visit her resting place before we left.”
Your whereabouts don’t really matter anymore, he was worried when he knocked on your door and you didn’t answer, but now what he finds more interesting is who you walk in with. He looks between the both of you full of curiosity and takes note of the way you walked in laughing, as well as the smile you wear, and the faint one that decorates the Lord's lips.
“I hope you are both hungry,” Cregan interjects while you come to a stop in front of the grand table. “We had something prepared for your welcome.”
“That’s nice—”
“We’re starving,” you cut your brother off bluntly and make your way around the table. “Flying for so long isn’t only draining for our dragons, but for us too.”
You approach Jacaerys and he surprises you by pulling a chair out for you. “Oh,” you praise his gesture. “Thank you, Jace.”
When you sit though he doesn’t walk around Cregan's seat like he should have, he makes sure to sit at your other side, leaving you in between both men.
“<What are you doing?>” You demand to know in High Valyrian.
Jacaerys pulls in his chair close to the table and looks at you to whisper back. “<Sitting.>”
You blink and lean your head back with a teasing smile playing on your lips. “<Are you nervous?>”
He squints and rebuttals immediately. “<What? Why should I be?>”
You’re choosing to be too naive and pat his shoulder. “<Your big sister is here do not worry.>”
He swats your hand away, and you steal a glance over at Cregan taking his seat beside you
“How many days do you have to be here before your husband sends you a raven?” Jacaerys fills the silence.
At first, you don’t want to entertain his question, he’s only going to make fun of Aemond, but you give him an assumption to be nice. “Three days. The last thing he wrote was, ‘come home now. Your place is here.’ And that was before we left the Eyrie.”
Jacaerys leans in and continues. “Has he actually written that he misses you?”
You hold his gaze and part your lips to argue in your husband's defense, but those words have not been written on paper so you don't rebuttal Jacaerys, you deflect. “Have you tried to make a move on Baela?”
Jacaerys clenches his jaw and speaks through gritted teeth. “What are you on about?”
You grab the cup in front of you and shrug. “What? She is your betrothed, it's okay to sneak off and you know, have a little fun.”
“Stop it.”
You take a sip of your drink and lean towards him. “When we get home I will play a game and lock you both in a room—oh! No! I’m brilliant!” You exclaim and push yourself back, making him grimace.
“Shut up.”
“Nothing boosts romance more than a fun little adventure, just you and her alone,” you share excitedly without shame that you’re talking to your brother about romance as if he were a lady. The gods didn’t give you sisters, just five brothers, so you have to make the best of what you have. “I will throw you out of the castle to go fetch dragon eggs, or you know, something fun.”
“You’re childish,” he snaps at you under his breath.
You exhale deeply and sit back proudly. “And when your wedding comes I will be paralyzed with joy. Unless she marries one of our Velaryon cousins,” you finish in a whisper to just light a small fire under his ass.
“What?” Jacaerys asks in a shocked whisper, which you ignore to share an amused smile with Cregan.
“Princess,” you hear someone call before you see Lady Maribell approaching with servants carrying supper. “We made your favorite to welcome you and the Prince.”
You watch your plate get put down with a big appetite and then look at Lady Maribell and touch your chest. “Thank you, ma’am, I’ll make sure to savor it well.”
The lady bows her head and leaves the hall, letting you appreciate your supper and the fact that these people took the time to prepare your favorite meal by their own will, or for the wishes of someone else, you don’t know, but it’s a huge difference with the way you get treated in the Red Keep.
“I would like to make a toast,” Cregan’s voice booms throughout the hall as he stands up, pulling the attention of those gathered in the hall. “To the Prince and Princess. Welcome to Winterfell, you honor not only me but the entire North for coming in person in the Queen's regard…”
You smile up at Cregan before you share your joy with Jacaerys.
“Your stay will not be long, but we will do our best to make you feel at home,” Cregan continues before he looks over Jacaerys. “The North may be a drastic change, but it is beautiful. I hope you learn to grow fond of it just as much as your sister has.”
You don’t check Jacaerys reaction, you meet Cregan's gaze and follow him all the way down to his seat with a soft appreciative smile, while his own gaze softens…for a moment, because his gaze then drifts over your shoulder and it loses that gentle touch.
You follow his line of gaze and meet your brother's thankful but slightly narrowed look that he holds with a smile. And as to not make suspect something you raise your cup to him.
He returns the gesture before looking past you again, making you now look at your steaming food and let out a slow deep breath as you try to remind yourself to keep yourself contained. In doing so, albeit you remember the tragic dinner you had at King's Landing not many nights ago and you now start to feel amused by the memory.
You happen to let your gaze wander over to your brother in the midst, and he slowly locks eyes with you. Silence follows for a moment, but then as if mentally tangled with your thoughts you both start to giggle before you chuckle together.
“Man,” he says between laughs. “I wish I would have seen your right hook. I missed it!”
You cover your mouth and stifle the laugh you want to let out and respond. “He was so shocked! I was holding that in for so long!”
You snort and lean towards each other. “It was such a mess from the start, but I applaud your toast. That was smooth.”
“Really? Thank you, I think I landed it too.” He takes your compliment and you both laugh together again before he grabs your shoulder and turns you towards the man at your other side.
“Lord Stark,” he happily drags Cregan into the conversation. “Considering you are friends with my sister, I will tell you a great feat she completed a few nights ago on our last night at Kings Landing.”
You shake your head lightheartedly and lick your lips as you catch your breath.
“To make this story short, one thing led to another and my sister landed a right hook on the usurper,” Jacaerys shares, making the corner of Cregan's lips twitch.
“He slammed our brother's face into the table,” you try to give reason to your actions. “I acted. My rings helped too.”
Jacaerys laughs softly and you meet his gaze and smile wide.
“It seems like an impressive feat indeed,” Cregan says and lets his gaze linger on you. “But I cannot say it surprises me, your sister has never been one to recoil from such things. I’d say she's fond of it.”
“Too much,” Jacaerys remarks. “It is why she would always get in trouble.”
Cregan huffs softly and meets your gaze. “I only wish I could have seen it,” he says directly at you while also letting your brother hear.
You can’t help your deep breath, or stop your face from burning under his impressed gaze. You don't say anything but luckily that conversation leads to a lighthearted dinner where Jacaerys and Cregan start to talk more instead of just passing glances.
Unfortunately, you do the one thing you told yourself you didn’t want to do, and that’s losing yourself in the bliss that comes with interacting with your brother and Cregan, the man you…have a secret past with.
You thought you could do better, you wanted not to get lost at all, but it pulled you down rather quickly and you couldn’t fight it. Especially because there’s something about seeing Cregan interact with your brother without tension or disdain, that makes your heart swoon.
“Jacaerys,” you blurt and turn to him. “Let’s dance.”
His eyebrows pinch together and he shakes his head before he answers. “What? No!”
You ignore him and jump from your seat to grab his arm and pull him with you to the center without as much as a protest. He likes to act all tough and nonchalant in front of others but he’s a big sweetheart when it comes to you and your brothers.
And he proves that further when he doesn’t fail to make you smile when you’re dancing slowly at first to follow the beat of the music that plays in the corner. When the music picks up he becomes faster but disregards the actual beat to start spinning you around the room.
“That’s not how you dance this!” You remark without much meaning behind your words. “You’re going to get me drunk!”
“You can handle it. You love it!” He assumes right and goes faster around the room without that initial worry of being judged or carrying this tough and proper image.
Neither of you actually find a worry in the world, it’s just him and you in that moment, laughing, and unaware of the pair of grey eyes that follow you all around the room. People talk to him, and a commotion surrounds him but Cregan finds a way to keep watching you laugh with your brother as he takes you around the room.
He should feel somewhat upset that your brother is bringing this different kind of joy out of you that he never saw when it was just you and him, but his heart only fills with bliss as he sees you so overjoyed. He knew how much you missed your family when you were living in Winterfell, so how can he be upset and petty that you’re so drunk with bliss by your brother's company?
Only a fool would refuse you this joy.
“Princess!”
You come to a quick halt and give your attention to the one who seeks it; catching Ser Rolf, one of your greatest friends just past the door.
“Ser Rolf!” You greet once you know who has beckoned you, and let your brother go to rush to your friend.
“I heard you were here and I came as fast as I could,” he says and answers your curiosity as to where he’s been before you had the chance to ask. “I almost feared I missed you.”
You shake your head. “No, you got lucky. Come!” You pull him with you to return to your brother. “Ser Rolf, this is my brother, Prince Jacaerys Velaryon.” You immediately introduce them.
“My Prince,” Ser Rolf greets him properly.
“Jace, this is one of my greatest friends from here, Ser Rolf,” you explain. “He went to my engagement tourney and played in my honor.”
Ser Rolf scoffs. “Well, I needed to show off my skills, and not let you Southerners forget how talented we can be.”
You smile at him and you both purposely leave out the other reason why he had gone.
“It's nice to finally meet you,” Ser Rolf directs at your brother. “Your sister often spoke fondly of you and the rest of your family.”
“Did she?” Jacaerys presses and flashes you a smug smirk. “When we return to our brothers I’m proudly going to use that over her head.”
Ser Rolf laughs and nudges you, and you roll your eyes.
“Do you mind if I steal your sister from you, My Prince?” Ser Rolf asks.
Said man shakes his head. “Not at all, go ahead, I need to step out anyway. I will be back.”
You offer him a comprehensive smile and watch him leave the hall before you face your friend. “Are you going to dance with me?”
Ser Rolf scoffs. “No. Unless it’s a command.”
You smile in amusement and shake your head. “Never to you.”
“Good, I may be swift with a sword, but I'm afraid I'm not a gifted dancer. My wife can attest to that,” he breathes out and points his hand away from the crowd of people dancing to walk away together.
“How is your family?” You ask.
Your friend looks at you and smiles sweetly for the first time tonight. “Good. My girl is a year old and a delight. You have a son, I heard.”
You clasp your hands together and nod. “Yes, Aerion. He’s four months old, and his father's pride.” You share now that you can share it with someone since so many details about your son felt wrong being shared with Cregan.
“About…the father,” Ser Rolf picks on that matter as he sits around the first table you see. “I hope my actions in that tournament did not get you in trouble. I saw him later that night at a feast after the tournament was over.”
You sit down first and sigh before you shake your head. “No. Do not worry…was he…” you trail off and glance at the ring Aemond gave you to fiddle with it. “…with anyone?”
You can feel Ser Rolf press his gaze on you, but you avoid it and wait, even if you shouldn’t considering who’s occupying your mind now too.
“No,” Ser Rolf answers hesitantly, making your heart skip a beat. “He was lurking in the corner watching over the other silver-haired Prince.”
You swallow back nervously and meet your friend's gaze to press him since he didn’t sound convincing. “Tell me, Rolf. I can take the truth. I mean look at me, I’m on opposite sides of this war.”
Ser Rolf quickly shakes his head and looks at you with a pitiful look. “I swear it, Princess. He was lurking the entire night. When his brother brought in women and tried to gift him one as an engagement present, he finally left.”
You let out a relieved sigh and nod in comprehension, feeling a lot more assured now than before. “Thank you, my friend.”
“Of course.”
You feel it now…how much you’re starting to miss Aemond. Which is all so conflicting, but you admit it, you miss your husband, especially when it’s just you and him. That’s when he lets his guard down and lets out this person he keeps within; this sweet, affectionate, and amusing person that knows how to love you in the way you want to be loved, and knows the deepest parts of you, while he lets you know his.
He doesn’t hide his love for you in public, he's not overly affectionate but he makes it known that you’re all his and he’s all yours. And perhaps that makes you a little too attached to one another, but you take pride in it and never feel alone.
But…
Yes, there’s a but when you’re in Winterfell, when Cregan is close, and when he comes to mind. You can’t let Cregan go. The love you shared was so consuming, it was full of passion, it was exciting, and it had so much to give that no matter what, you could never get enough of one another.
But that's it isn't it? Was. You need to let go.
“How are you…holding up?” Ser Rolf breaks you from your troubled mind and only makes you confused. “With…you know…” he trails off and points to the side.
You follow his line of gaze and realize that he’s referring to Cregan.
“Rolf,” you warn him, making him laugh.
“He’s finally smiling,” he makes matters worse and makes you smile down at the table while your stupid heart skips a beat.
“He hasn’t been with anyone,” Ser Rolf clarifies and you snap your eyes at him and kick his shin.
“Stop.”
Rolf smirks and rubs his wounded area, while your eyes wander to the man you’re talking about, and you see him leaving the hall.
You almost find it in you to follow him out, but what will that bring? Nothing but temptation. You did good before when it was just him and you, but the stars are out, and the snow blankets the ground, it will feel like one of those nights when you would admire the sky in each other's embrace, and you’ll probably lose it, so you stay put and keep talking to your friend while also watching for your brother.
Eventually, more of Cregan's friends join Ser Rolf and you, but as much as you enjoy their company you can’t rest easy without knowing about your brother. He left a while ago and hasn’t returned. He would’ve told you if he went to bed, but he hasn’t. He said he needed to step out and hasn’t returned.
Maybe he froze out there since all he’s used to is a chill—but more seriously you should go check on him.
You stand up and just as you’re going to excuse yourself you catch your brother walking inside in front of Cregan.
They approach the table and you want to ask about your brother's whereabouts, but Cregan interjects. “I've decided we could take him hunting tomorrow morning and have lunch there, so he can know some of the North’s wilderness.”
You look at your brother and he gives you an assuring nod. And considering Cregan hasn’t given you an answer you have no choice but to accept. “Very well then.”
“I might’ve overshared with your brother just now,” Cregan continues to direct at you as you step back and sit back down.
“No, no,” Jacaerys shakes his head. “He glorified.”
You cross your leg over the other and press them. “What?”
Cregan glances at your brother and then looks back at you. “I might have praised your archery skills on dragonback.”
You smile at Cregan and pass your brother a cocky look. “It’s true. I am an excellent shot on Dragonback, but I cannot take all the credit, Astraea helps me when she flies. I think Lord Stark is just too in awe of the dragon itself.”
Cregan huffs and points his chin at you. “You are being too humble. You deserve the praise, not anyone can hit the target while moving, especially while flying. And you like to stand, which, that alone deserves its own praise.”
You shake your head. “You flatter me too much.”
“But I do suppose the same cannot be said about your traps. She almost caught her own leg once,” he shares a bit too amused. “Arra caught her in time.”
You shake your head. “It was not my fault,” you rebuttal. “You were distracting me. Hunting is done in silence and you distracted me.”
Cregan scoffs. “Are we talking about the same day?” He teases. “You are remembering wrong. I did not do such a thing.”
You touch your chest and slowly get up. “Lord Stark, are you calling me a liar?”
He shakes his head. “Admit it, you could have used help.”
You inhale deeply and nod. “Only if you admit you spoiled our bait for that fishing evening on your name day.”
Cregan parts his lips but he can’t deny you so he presses his lips together and nods slowly, causing you to nod in return, and share a mutual agreement to your questions through shared glances that you don’t break. There in the middle of your friends and brother, you look at each other as if it’s only you and him in that hall, in this world entirely. You exist only for each other.
Until the reminder tears it all down and pulls you back into reality. “Sister why don’t you sing us a song,” Jacaerys exposes you.
“What?” You gasp and ignore all the looks you get.
Jacaerys nods. “It seems fitting. It’s still early, I think it would be nice for you to fill the hall with your song.”
You blink repeatedly and shake your head quickly hoping he’ll get the hint, but he does the opposite as if purposely torturing you. “Wait…you have not sung here?”
You stay quiet and spare a glance at Cregan who is too amused by what’s going on.
“Wow…” Jacaerys trails off to chuckle before he faces the crowd of your friends and Cregan. “That is why she is called the Siren of Driftmark.”
You bite the inside of your cheek and groan.
“I thought you said it was because you were a good swimmer,” Ser Rolf points out.
You shake your head. “No,” you grumble.
Jacaerys moves over to you to grab your shoulder and shake you gently. “She’s really good. She sings all the time,” he praises you. “She just sang the other day when we got to Dragonstone.”
You shake your head and feign a smile. “No, no, my brother is being too nice. He’s exaggerating.” You laugh and then turn to your brother to shoot him a burning glare. “You’re exaggerating,” you sneer at him through gritted teeth.
Jacaerys chuckles and pushes you forward. “Sing us a song. Come on!”
You share a breathless chuckle and turn on your heels to point back at your brother. “I would not want you to cry,” you reveal and glance at the crowd. “When he was a boy he would hide at the back of the crowd so no one would see him cry when I sang.”
Jacaerys doesn’t give you the satisfaction of being flustered, he just smiles, and Cregan steps in.
“Come on, prove your name, princess.”
You pass him a glare and sigh deeply.
“Just one,” Cregan insists with a sweet and intrigued look that really makes it hard to say no to.
“Fine…” you give him brugrudgly. “But…I’ll sing a Sea Shanty. One father liked to sing with us, Jacaerys, so you can sing with me.” You smirk.
Your brother is quick though and shakes his head. “No, no, anyone happy enough can sing a Sea Shanty. Sing a different song.”
“You’ll be surprised not everyone can,” you murmur and stare at your brother with a piercing glare but don’t argue now. You’ll get nowhere, so you begin to step away from the crowd. “Only if you do it,” you protest and turn back to your brother.
“No,” he snaps.
“Do what?” Ser Rolf probes.
You grab your brother's arm and he gives your friend the answer. “Our father would present her to the crowd as if she was a famous singer before she sang.”
You nod eagerly and shake him, but he shakes his head to deny you of such a pleasure.
“I’ll do it,” Ser Rolf volunteers and takes you with him, but leaves you at the side as he runs to the center and steals everyone’s attention.
“Can I get everyone’s attention please! Tonight we have a special guest blessing this hall with her song! May I present the Siren of Driftmark!” He shouts and you don’t shy away or protest now, you run to the center, and bow to the crowd while you spread your arms out like a dragon spreads its wings.
“Hello, Winterfell!” You address the crowd and stand tall without a hint of smugness or your nose in the air to show your royal status, you show off a charm that hasn’t been seen in this hall and gains all the wavering attention to you, as if you were born to lead the masses. “Now, now I know what you may be wondering! Can she really sing, she’s never proved that to us! But,” you laugh softly. “I promise that I at least will not make your ears bleed.”
The crowd laughs and a warm look grows on the serious Lord’s face.
“This song goes to my brother who accompanies me this time around,” you let it be known so you don’t share all the attention. “And of course to your Lord Stark. Thank you for hosting us tonight, my friend.”
You flash him a smile and he nods gently in return, unable to keep his eyes off as you whisper to the band in the corner. He follows your every step with a curiosity that grows only as you clear your throat, take in the crowd that’s gathered in the hall, and draw out a deep breath, because after you part your lips and start to sing softly for all the crowd to hear, all he knows is complete awe as you grow louder and more enchanting with your song.
You become one with yourself and it makes it impossible for anyone to turn away, all the attention is on you as if you were a real-life siren. Yet no matter how many eyes watch you, how surprised and amazed everyone is, and how that prides you, all your attention falls on one man who only watches you with awe, because in this hall it’s just you and him once again.
——
*THE NEXT DAY*
Fishing has never been your strength, you enjoy the quality time when you go with someone, but besides that, you aren’t patient enough to wait for a fish to take the bait.
It’s why as you watch the blue fish in murky waters you make sure to stay out of the water as you slowly pick up your bow, and align your arrow, hoping it won’t hear you and swim off somehow.
Albeit the fish with blue scales moves, making you hold your breath and wait…
Good thing it just moves under the sunbeam that casts in the water. Now though, you do feel guilty for trying to kill it, it’s so beautiful, its scales glimmer a deep blue against the sun like the prettiest gems are stuck to it.
Yet a fish is all it is.
Before you can shoot though, the fish swims away quickly. “Damn, damn,” you hiss and move your aim along with its hasty movements to not let it get out of sight. And just before it can escape into the shallow river, you let the arrow go and luckily shoot the fish right through its eye.
“Haha,” you celebrate to yourself and throw your bow aside to pull your fur cloak off and leave it on the giant rock so it doesn't get wet when you step into the water.
“Oh,” you gasp at the icy touch and rush to grab the fish on the tips of your feet whilst letting out quick ‘oh’s at the cold touch of the water.
However, before you can attempt to turn and run out of the water you catch a branch snap behind you and stiffen.
There's only two people it can be, but you’re still so nervous that the Greens are going to find you that your mind panics and quickly makes you reach for your dagger around your belt.
When you hold the handle you slowly peer back and gasp when you just see Cregan. “Gods,” you breathe out and let the dagger go. “You startled me.”
Cregan finally walks out of the tree line and puts his hands up. “Forgive me, I didn’t want to interrupt your moment. Forgive me.”
You laugh nervously and walk out of the water with relief, and your trophy in hand.
“You’ve been on edge lately,” he points out as he watches you trade your trophy for your cloak.
You sigh. “With this impending war, my husband and his family have been insistent on getting me and Aerion back to King's Landing, that I fear they’ll be in every corner I turn,” you share as you hang your cloak around your shoulders.
Cregan drops his head and nods gently. “Well, no Greens will reach you here. You have my word.”
He looks up and you meet his gaze and offer him a gentle and thankful smile before you grab your arrow from the rock and show off your prize. “I promised my little brother Joffrey we would go fishing, but I think this way is more effective, do you not think?”
Cregan gets closer and tilts his head to the side to shrug. “Can’t say it’ll be called fishing if that’s the way you go.”
You scoff and flick your wrist to brush him off. “Sure it is, we will just use a bow and arrow to catch our fish. I don’t want to wait hours to get one on a hook.”
Cregan huffs and you take that as a challenge. “But I know fishing in the extreme is not for everyone.”
A faint smile breaks on his face and he remarks. “Who do you think you are talking to exactly?”
You shrug and pick up your bow to offer it to him. “Prove your skill, Lord Stark.”
Without further argument, Cregan takes the bow and narrows his gaze. “You know how much I hate it when you’re so formal with me,” he remarks.
You shoot him a simple teasing smile and let the bow go to fall by his side instead. “Alright there’s one right across from us,” you whisper as you hand him an arrow. “Quietly.”
Cregan aligns his arrow and tilts his head down toward you. “Who taught you to hunt?” He picks on your comment.
You lift your gaze, catching the gleam in his eyes, and giggle. His gaze lingers, threatening to drive your heart mad so you look down first and he follows your gaze to follow his prey. When he thinks he has the right angle to catch the fish he lets the arrow go, but the wooden weapon whizzes to the fish's side and only works to startle it away.
“Aha!” You blurt and grab his arm. “I told you. Skill!”
“Oh, hush you,” he brushes you off with a grin before he walks over to collect your arrow. “Oh, by the way, singing?! How come you never told me?”
You sit back on the giant rock and shrug. “One, because I was quite timid to sing to you,” you admit and make him smile at the ground. “And two…after my father died…I just lost my heart to sing. It did not feel right.”
Cregan steps out of the water and his smile fades to show his comprehension. “I understand,” he says quietly and puts your arrow bag in the leather holster.
“I would sing for my grandfather Viserys when I returned to the Red Keep, but I didn’t have a heart to sing until I had Aerion,” you muse as you miss your boy. “He made me find my voice again. And now he falls asleep to my song.”
“What a lucky lad,” Cregan says and steps toward. “You have a beautiful voice. I understand why you got your name.”
A warmth creeps on your cheeks and you smile at the rock beneath you. “Thank you,” you whisper. “And don’t take it as something I hid from you, you are just learning something new from me.”
He hums softly and adds. “It’s just a way to keep me on my toes, I respect that.”
You return his hum and blink to look over at him, catching his watchful gaze, and feeling at that moment a need to entrust him with something that’s been troubling you, something that didn’t satisfy you when you spoke about it to your grandmother.
“Can I ask you something?” You ask hesitantly. “If it makes you uncomfortable, tell me, all right?”
Cregan shifts in his stance and nods without hesitation. “It’s all right, go on,” he assures you to keep going.
You avert your gaze and fiddle with the ring that Aemond gifted you. “It’s just,” you breathe out and make sure Jacaerys isn’t approaching before you continue. “You’re the most loyal man I know. Your oaths are everything to you,” you tell him, making him slowly sit down beside you. “So can you tell me where my loyalties should lie? Should I return to my husband? Especially now that we have a child should I follow him blindly? Growing up, the Septa’s would plague me with how to be a good wife, Alicent makes indirect comments all the time, it's my job as a woman to be a loyal wife, but…” you trail off and look up at the sky and exhale shakily.
“I love my mother, I love my family, and I know she’s the one who belongs on the throne,” you continue to confide in him. “It was stolen from her, nothing will ever make me look at that differently. I will follow her rule, but…Aemond is my husband. He stands loyally on the other side, shouldn’t I stand by his side? Follow him blindly?” You ask from the depths of your torn heart and drop your gaze to look at Cregan with an aching look that wounds his heart.
“He might be your husband, and you may have a responsibility to him now that should come over your mother, but you still have your beliefs,” Cregan says with sincerity since he knows that all you need now is a friend, not a jealous ex-lover. “What you want still matters. And you know what you want to do, I hear it now, I see it with my own eyes. Don't betray yourself just because you don’t want to disappoint one or the other,” he reassures you softly and leans closer to you without actually touching your hand that’s pressed on the rock next to his, he doesn’t let his breath unfurl over your skin, or let his lips brush against your cheek. He just gets his face closer so you can feel his comfort.
“Would you do it?” You can’t help but ask. “Would you go against your wife if she was on opposite sides of a war?”
Cregan sighs deeply and doesn’t debate his answer, he nods, and you add something that pains him to hear because he knows what it really means. “Even if you loved her?”
Cregan swallows thickly but he doesn’t let his eyes fall, he nods stiffly. “If it was the right thing to do, yes. Even if it pained me.”
You drift your gaze away and nod, hoping you can beat the stinging in your throat, but tears fall from your eyes.
“It’s okay,” he whispers. “It will be okay.”
You sniffle and meet his gaze to probe speechlessly.
Cregan understands your gesture and nods, making you offer him a gentle smile and lean towards him. “Thank you, Cregan. It really means a lot.”
“Of course,” he says with a caring look that works to assure the doubt and lift the weight you’ve been carrying on your shoulders since you found out what happened.
“Thank you,” you add much to his surprise and yours while letting yourself grab his hand. “For loving me.”
Cregan stares at you for a lingering moment with his eyebrows furrowing and unknotting with every emotion that runs through his mind and makes his heart race. “I would do it again, it was my honor,” he speaks softly.
Your bottom lip trembles but you don't cry, you let your head fall on his shoulder for a brief second to express the deep unspoken love that you’ll never actually be able to let go. It’ll forever be scarred in your soul.
And that’s all you could ask for in this world full of horrors. Even if there's no proper goodbye, and there’s so much left untouched, this moment is all you could ever want, it welcomes a comforting silence that brings a smile to your face as you both watch the serene environment.
“We should find your brother,” Cregan breaks the silence after a long moment of being selfish.
You hesitate for a moment but you slide off the rock and collect your stuff before you lead the way back into the forest.
“Do you…” Cregan starts to say while he helps you by carrying the fish you caught. “Still dream of flying to faraway places?”
You keep your eyes out for your brother and purse your lips together as you sigh. “Would you be disappointed if I said I did? Only sometimes though.”
Cregan chuckles. “No, of course not. I’m glad you still do. Where to?”
You suck in air and twirl around to face him as you walk back. “Maybe,” you breathe out and happily share what he wants to know. “Yi Ti. I was given this beautiful gem necklace from there and I’ve been completely enamored by the place ever since. It’s said princes live in solid gold houses.” You nod eagerly, making him scoff.
“My most favorite gowns are made of silks from Yi Ti,” you muse and turn back around on your heels. “Some I have yet to wear because I have been saving them. Hopefully, I get to wear one soon! Don’t worry though my feet are still on the ground,” you make sure to assure Cregan. “I have not forgotten what I learned here.”
You hear him hum before he mutters. “I’m quite curious about these expensive gowns.”
Your breath catches in surprise and you peer over to shoot him a pointed look. He responds by flashing you a charming smile that makes you roll your eyes and hold back your smile.
Thankfully in that next moment, you spot your brother in the distance and force all your focus on him.
Jacaerys doesn’t seem to spot you right away though, so after a quick and brilliant idea hits you you leave Cregan behind to sneak around Jacaerys. Once you get close and he’s made some distance from the tree you’re hiding behind, you slip out and avoid stepping on all the branches and dry leaves. When you’re close enough you bite back your smile and raise your hands to jump on his back, but much to your misfortune he’s too perceptive and ruins your plan. “I saw your foot behind the tree.”
You blow out air and drop your arms with a pout. Jacaerys turns and spots Cregan walking out of the shadows first before he faces you and shows off the rabbits he caught. “What did you catch?”
You frown deeper and point at the single fish, making him chuckle. “That’s all?! I thought you were some great hunter!”
You roll your eyes and sputter out an excuse. “Well, I did see some rabbits but I didn’t want to kill them, they were adorable.”
And you can’t say Cregan distracted you either, for the most part, you were just walking and taking in the sights you left behind last year.
“Uh-huh.” Jacaerys nods with a smug smile on his face. “Sure,” he quips. “You are such a girl.”
You roll your eyes and wave him off before you get ahead of the group and lead the way to a distant clearing where you’ll have lunch. “A few months back,” you share to fill the silence and avoid your previous topic. “I was at the market street and on our way back I ran into this Red priestess.”
“A witch,” Jacaerys corrects you, causing you to turn around and counter.
“No, a red priestess. Calling them witches is kind of mean.”
Jacaerys scoffs and turns to Cregan for support. “I say witches, what do you call them here, Lord Stark?”
Said man grabs his blade hooked on his belt and meets your brother's gaze with a hidden smugness behind his eyes. “Witches, but sometimes we call them pretenders, depending on the price.”
Jacaerys chuckles and you know they’re obviously just working against you so you choose to ignore the negativity and go on. “Anyway!” You exclaim and twirl back around. “She told me my future. She said…” you leave them with anticipation for a few seconds before you share what you were told. “I would have seven kids.”
“Gods,” Jacaerys murmurs.
“Mhmm.”
“Now,” Jacaerys cuts in and rushes over to fall by your side, leading Cregan to fall on your other side—“Who will give you all these children if your husband dies in this war?”
Without as much as thinking you turn to your brother and nudge his chest to make him think it’s something you planned when really you’re just teasing him. Kind of. “You. We could get married.”
Your brother's face falls and he immediately shakes his head and turns you down bluntly. “No. I would not marry you.”
“Oh right, there’s Baela,” you point out and grab your chin as you think deeply. “Well…I could take her. She’s quite terrifying, but yes,” you nod and look back at your brother. “I can take her in both a dragon fight and hand-to-hand combat…I think.”
Jacaerys' nose scrunches and he shakes his head again. “No, I would not marry you! You are…you.”
You look around confused and pick on that considering your house is known to marry within the family to keep the bloodlines pure. Aegon and Helaena are married.
“So?”
Jacaerys parts his lips but he can’t think of a strong argument that will beat the truth. Yet you do take a good look at Jacaerys and find an excuse. “You are right,” you mutter. “We could not, I do favor taller men, thus maybe...” you trail off to think, leaving Jacaerys offended by your bold comment.
“A Prince from Yi Ti with a house made of gold,” Cregan finishes for you, making you snap your eyes at him and smile slowly in amusement.
“Funny,” you hold back your laugh. “Very funny.”
He rolls his head down and hides his smile.
Gods laughing with him is so much better in person. He can be very funny in a serious way that only makes what he says or does that much funnier.
“She also let me see in the fire,” you continue to share more excitedly now. “And what I saw was a girl—”
“Wait, wait,” Jacaerys cuts you off and wipes away his smile. “Now when this priestess of yours talked to you, was she on the other side of this fire?”
You look away and bite your cheek before you lie by shaking your head as a response.
Albeit Cregan knows you well and points you out. “Liar.”
“Yes, fine!” You exclaim and gently nudge him away. “She was at the other side, but it was not her that I saw, it was a girl with silver hair,” you catch your brother's serious attention now. “She…stood on top of a mountain covered in snow, ashes, and death.”
Cregan’s own amusement falls and your brother doesn’t dare to tease you now, so you go on.
“All brought by…<A long winter,>,” you finish in High Valyrian to mirror the way the Red Priestess told you before you repeat in the common tongue. “A long winter.”
Both men look at you but one doesn’t look at you with disbelief, nor fear, he’s serious and deep in thought, while your brother lets out a dry laugh and shakes his head to try and deny what you shared.
“I believe it,” you defend yourself and what you saw in that fire because it was clear as day as if you were seeing a memory that hasn’t happened.
“I also believe what this old man said about Ice dragons living past the wall,” you tell your brother, and Cregan interjects right away.
“Old man Thomas is known for tall tales. There are things that are true, but what he says is not.”
You shrug. “He’s well-traveled, why wouldn’t it be true?” You rebuttal and lean towards him.
“Because,” Cregan argues and leans towards you. “He likes attention. And he’s drunk all the time.”
“A drunk man is less likely to lie, you know that because you don’t lie when you’re drunk.”
His lips twitch and before he can respond with something in his defense his eyes turn to your brother at your other side. You discreetly follow his line of gaze and catch your brother's attention so you play it off quickly.
“All I’m saying is I believe what I saw, it may not happen in our lifetime, but it’s in our future,”
A short silence follows that only works to make you grow nervous over what your brother might’ve just thought. But he thankfully brushes you off.
“Maybe but you probably got ripped off by a fake witch.”
Once again you choose to ignore this negativity spouted by your brother and instead drift your attention to lunch, and since Cregan was more in charge of guiding Jacaerys, he didn’t catch anything. All you have is the single fish you caught and the rabbits Jacaerys caught, but neither one of you wants to skin them, so you eat a small lunch and share the fish over a quite fun moment where you, unfortunately, don't receive an answer from Cregan, regarding what he’s willing to offer your mother.
You hoped he’d finally say it during supper, but supper came and passed, and nothing. That lack of response followed until the next two days too, leaving your brother quite impatient now.
“What have you told him?” Jacaerys greets you ever so warmly.
“What have I told who?” You pretend to act clueless while you pick a square cake from the tray and study it before you plop it into your mouth.
“Lord Stark,” he snaps.
You knew he was getting to that since you spotted him stomping over to you and Astraea, but you had hoped he wouldn’t get to it yet.
“It's been days and you said you would talk to him! We don’t have days to waste,” he remarks and spats out your name before going on to give you a mean reminder. “We need to leave and we have nothing.”
You don’t intend to sit up or fix your gaze on your brother, you keep yourself against your dragon's large arm and respond calmly. “He promised he would give us an answer—”
“When?” Jacaerys cuts you off and crouches down to take the tray of cake from you. “When?”
You drag your eyes up and nonchalantly answer. “He cannot pull the army out of his ass, Jacaerys. We have to wait, if he promised he would do something he is going to do it.”
Your brother rolls his eyes and turns away to let out a frustrated breath. “There's a difference between saying a promise and actually committing to it. I do not know how close you are or if you have actually talked to him, but you need to figure something out, that is why you are here.” He mutters.
You watch him knowing that he has a right to be annoyed, Lady Arryn gave you her answer quite quickly, and you’ve been in Winterfell for days but still haven’t received a word on what Cregan will give to support his Queen, but you also trust Cregan, you know he’s going to do what he says, you just need to wait.
“I’ll talk to him again,” you assure him. “If he doesn’t give anything then we’ll return home with his simple loyalty.”
Jacaerys rests his hand on his hip and lets out a deep breath. “All right, that sounds good.”
You sigh and nod, letting a silence linger for a moment before you lean forward. “Can I get those back?”
“What?” He breathes out and turns all dramatically with his cloak twirling with him.
“My cake pieces,” you point at the tray in his hand with your eyes.
Jacaerys passes you a judgmental look before he leans over and lets you take the tray he took.
“Aemond found me,” you let him know of the raven that came to you this morning. “He said ‘come home at once’. Shorter than the last one but still persistent.” You giggle.
Jacaerys walks over to sit next to you against a sleeping Astraea. “Will you?” He asks with genuine curiosity.
You take a cake piece and shake your head. “No…our mother belongs on that throne and I am going to stand by that,” you say confidently now that you know where you want to stand. “He can try to take me by force if he wants, but I am going to fight for her.”
Jacaerys looks over at you with a faint smile and nods in comprehension. “I’m glad to hear it.”
You mirror his smile and offer him a piece of cake. As he takes one a memory creeps in and your smile widens before you can tell it to him. “Do you remember a few years ago, when Lucerys disowned me because he thought I ate the last piece of lemon cake?”
Midchew Jacaerys loses himself in thought before he snorts, spitting out pieces of cake, and causing you to scrunch your nose in disgust.
“Ew,” you grumble and he interjects abruptly.
“Yes! I remember he’s like you cannot be my sister anymore because you are selfish and you ate it all!” He mocks your younger brother.
You giggle and nod, but before you can add to that shared memory Astraea suddenly raises her head, bringing Jacaerys and you to a pause to look over; noticing none other than Cregan approaching.
When he’s near he bows his head and greets the both of you on the ground. “Good day, my princess, my prince.”
You smile at him and greet him for both Jacaerys and you. “Good day. It is nice to see your face today, we ate lunch and breakfast alone.”
Cregan bows his head again. “I am terribly sorry, I have been busy all day, I only barely got out.”
You remember his long days, on some terribly long ones, he wouldn't be let out until it was time to go to bed. You would usually meet him in his chambers on those days and just lay down enjoying each other's company. Today all you can do is look at each other as nothing but old friends.
“I hope your day has not been dull,” Cregan worries.
You shake your head. “No, we were just reminiscing about a day of our childhood when,” you snicker and go on. “Our little brother Lucerys disowned me because he thought I ate the last piece of lemon cake.”
Jacaerys nods and continues the story for you. “We both knew there was more so she pretended to leave. Our mother came in a few moments later with more and Lucerys completely freaked,” Jacaerys laughs and stands up as if that would change the way he was telling it. “He started bawling and ran out to look for our sister.”
“When he found me,” you finish the story. “He’s like I am so sorry, I never meant what I said. Come back, do not leave us. You can have as much cake as you want!” You finish with a laugh and Jacaerys joins you.
“That sounds like quite a memory,” Cregan says and reaches out to pat your dragon's snout since she leans towards him with dilated eyes. “Did your mother say anything?”
You and Jacaerys stare at one another in search of the answer, but you can’t recall.
“Not that I remember,” you mention and look back at Cregan. “But it was quite a memory. Lucerys is a sweetheart.”
Cregan hums and Astraea groans softly in response to his touch.
“Oh, maybe you needed something, my Lord?” Jacaerys only asks now.
“Well,” Cregan sighs. “I only wanted to invite the both of you to Castle Black on the morrow so you could see the wall, My Prince. Just before you leave, that is.”
You and your brother share a hopeful look and even if Jacaerys was quite impatient to leave, now he accepts Cregan's invitation. “I have always wanted to see the wall. It would be a pleasure.”
“Good, we will leave at first light then.” Cregan lets you both know and leaves you hoping for a good response that will hopefully make your mother proud.
.
.
.
.
A/N- Who’s the 2nd heart of fire? A new character we’re getting soon, or someone else
Tagged- @namelesslosers @stargaryenx @chainsawsangel @lauftivy @winxschester @cloudroomblog @llarue @padsdarlg @sofietargaryen @gracielikegrapes @dreaming-of-the-reality @itzelpeyton @patdsinner33 @mrsdominickstark @elaena-aerrin @todoroki-slut @snh96 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @nifujiswhore @sweethoneyblossom1 @kaetastic @lightdragonrayne @squidscottjeans @oh-you-mean-me
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billyshakesp · 4 months ago
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One for his Lyctors
Something that will never cease to amaze me is how well TazMuir writes the Lyctors. So I'm making it your problem ;). CW: Spoilers for Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth.
Let's start off by stating the obvious: the Lyctors are old. Whenever I mention "the Lyctors" in this post, I'm referring to Jod's original crew of eight Lyctors, and, more specifically, Augustine the First, Mercymorn the First, Gideon the First, and Cytherea the First. Those four are the ones we have met at the time of writing this. And they are old. They are each ten thousand years old. However, ten thousand is a number which may not mean much to you since you (presumably) have not even reached the age of two hundred. To quickly contextualise how colossal a number ten thousand years is, just remember that written history only extends as far back as five thousand years. In not so many words, my bbygirls are not actually very baby, and are, in fact, fucking ancient.
We, as humans, do not have any living reference for a ten-thousand-year-old being, aside from an occasional tree or a sponge, or perhaps a condiment bottle so deep in the back of your fridge that it would warrant a paleontological dig, but I digress. So how does Muir write her Lyctors so effectively?
Vicious dehumanisation
One of the most striking things about the Lyctors is the dehumanisation they have suffered over the past myriad. The first thing I noticed while diving into this subject (and by diving into, I mean I took a long shower one day and pissed off my family) is that the Lyctors do not have last names, and their first names function more as titles. Furthermore, the Lyctors are referred to as the hands, fingers, and gestures of the Emperor. In short, the readers and the characters of the Locked Tomb, including the Lyctors themselves, don't see the Lyctors as individuals anymore. Rather, their sole purpose in life has been reduced to just a soldier of the Emperor. Muir really shows the effects of the Lyctors' age; they are ancient, to the point where they have lost their own humanity and the only reason for their existence that they still hold onto is to serve the Emperor.
2. Their morals
Are extremely fucked up. Like, I cannot emphasise enough how fucked up the Lyctors are as people. Their morals are twisted in a way which can only come about from ten thousand years, rotting in deep space. For example, G1deon probably makes like 56 attempts on Harrow's life, and he doesn't give a second thought about it. When the other Lyctors find him, they don't really condemn his actions the way a human would expect another human to condemn attempted murder. To the Lyctors, life and death are both abstract concepts: life has lost all its meaning to the Lyctors, and thus, they do not see value in others' lives, especially the life of another Lyctor. Especially the life of a "Half-Lyctor." Additionally, Cytherea's plot to destroy the Nine Houses, while technically noble in its intent, is just insanely messed up. Yet, it makes sense in the context of her being a Lyctor, and, furthermore, someone who has suffered abuse for the last ten thousand years. She wants to bring justice to Jod, and for her, a small genocide is completely insubstantial. These people do not value nor understand life the way a human would, because they are unbelievably old.
3. The ways they break
Every one of the original Lyctors we see has a point in which they break, and when they break, we see a glimpse of the humanity peeking through. I could do character analysis on all of the Lyctors, but that would take a really long time. In short, we, the reader, get to see shreds of the people the Lyctors once were, and yet this only demonstrates just how shattered they are under the inexorable weight of time (yes, I use inexorable excessively now that I've read these books). Muir feeds us these pieces of the Lyctors' former selves to show just how buried that former self is.
In short, Muir does such a good job writing her Lyctors. They really are some of the most beautifully tragic characters I've ever read. I'm really just compiling some of the elements which I think Muir used to achieve the effect of "this character is bloody ancient." Feel free to add anything you feel that I missed (and I'm sure I missed a lot of stuff), and thanks for reading!
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o-pandora-o · 6 months ago
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Dating Beleth Headcanons (SFW and NSFW)
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Note: This is NOT SPOILER FREE. After playing the event and have unlocked few of info via intimacy, I am currently hungry of Beleth content. Please be advised that this is not spoiler free and will connect a few info from the event or intimacy info. Writing this before I completed 100% of his intimacy info (currently at 27%). Writing in gender neutral pronouns.
How is it like dating the de facto King (in terms of what he does) - Right hand of Belphegor - Beleth?
🚬 One of the loyal green flags in Hell, once he picks someone to be his partner, don't expect him to entertain others. He might have the charisma to get along with others; however, he will definitely not entertain others who flirt with him when he's taken. He'd politely say "Hahaha. Sorry to break it to you pretty boy/girl, I'm already taken", bonus points if they flirt in front of you, he'd hold your waist and pull you close to him, no questions asked.
‌🚬He would definitely call you cute pet names such as "kitten", "kitty", "baby", and "babe". He like cute things, so he'll call you something cute too wink wonk.
🚬He isn't picky when it comes to his partner, he mostly looks at what's inside rather than what's outside. He doesn't care of your gender, nor your physical appearance. Whether your thin, chubby, plus-sized, or small. He'll love you, since he chose you to be his partner out of the many people he slept with.
🚬His love language is Act of Service, similar to Valefor, he'd do anything because you deserve everything. He may look like a bad boy, but he's a good guy at heart. He'd hold the door for you. He'd take your bag whenever you go out. Honestly, he's quite used to this because he takes care of his king - Belphegor.
🚬‌If you're feeling sick he'd take a leave from the palace and take care of you. He'd cook your comfort foods, provide comfort and warmth. Even if you're not sick, he'd cook for you if he wakes up before you.
🚬‌He's also keen on things you once said. He might bring home some desserts or food if you mentioned something that you wanna try it. Or plan a date on a newly opened cafe because you once mentioned it.
🚬He always likes it whenever he does something for you, especially if you request something. He'd do anything just to make you happy. ‌His secondary love language is physical touch. He is purely consensual and will ask you if it will be okay to touch you (hold hands, hugs, kisses) especially if you're not the type of person that is fond of physical touch.
🚬He loves LOVES being the big spoon! He's pretty tall and loves seeing you all small in his embrace. He also likes to pat your head whenever you look so cute. Bonus if you pout, he'd laugh heartily.
🚬He's pretty neutral when it comes to PDA. He respects your personal space but if he needs to display his affection, he might do so. For example if one demon decides to flirt with you, not knowing Beleth is your s/o. "It seems you really are famous with the demons, no?" Beleth said to you "Sorry my friend, it seems they're already taken, Hahaha." He wraps his arms around you and pulls you close and kisses your forehead
🚬‌Doesn't get jealous easily. He trust you so much to the point that he doesn't get jealous when other demons talk to you. However, it will be another issue if he notices something fishy with the other party. He'd be more protective rather than jealous.
🚬‌He's fond of cute animals especially baby ones. He feeds stray cats and dogs, one some rare occasions he might bring home one. "Hi baby I hope you don't mind I brought home a small kitty. I was watching him for a few days now, he's all alone. I hope you don't mind haha." He cradles the small kitty like his baby, while making that sweet smile "But Beleth… that's the 10th cat this month…"
🚬‌He does not belittle anything or anyone, even his opponents or you. When he heard someone talking shit about you and your abilities he'd butt in and politely negate their comments. "Hahaha. I wouldn't be too sure of that, my baby can pack a punch you know".
🚬He's practically the son of the Black cat x golden retriever trope. He's so cool, chill, and he practically gets along with everybody. His aura screams bad boy but to you he's like a dog (or in his case, a cat) waiting for your orders and affection.
🚬‌He once thought that you might be scared of his demon cat form, but you proved him wrong. "Are you sure you wanna see it, y/n?" "Yes! Please!!" "You know I don't show this normally right? I just show this whenever I'm mad. Haha" A cold sweat drops from his forehead "Yes! Bathin told me that too! Even Harumon!! May I see it pretty please?" "Promise me you won't change how you look at me, mkay?" "I promise!!!" "Alright, a promise is a promise, okay?" He hesitantly transforms into a gigantic demon cat "…" You stared at him "Y/n…?" He meowed " YOU'RE SO FLUFFY AND CUTE SORRY I LIED I CHANGE HOW I LOOK AT YOU NOW OMG YOU'RE SO FLUFFY!!!" You run a hand into his fur and hug him He was happy and shocked that you enjoyed looking at his demon cat form
🚬‌He enjoys it if you run your hand into his fur, it makes him purr if you scratch certain places. He will sometimes wrap his body around you and it will be okay for him if you sleep on his soft fur.
🚬‌He gets a bit upset or sad if he can't see you in the days that he's busy with Belphegor's orders or errands. Honestly your competitor is his Majesty Belphegor himself in your time with Beleth. I wouldn't say Beleth is too busy like Bael, but he may be busy occasionally due to fights or troublesome issues. He might request Harumon to bring you something if he can't come home.
🚬He sometimes fight for fun, kinda similar to training. Hottest time is when he fights without a top on, when sweat trickles down his chest and abs. "Y/n please close your mouth and don't drool" Gusion said as he was requested to supervise so you wouldn't get hurt. He'd also enjoy it if you bring him a towel. "Hmm? Do you wanna wipe my swear, lil one? Just kidding haha" He likes to tease you
🚬The only time he'd lose his chill is if you're in danger and if the angels did something to you. "What did you do to them?!" "Oh ex-brother Beleth! I just removed the temptation from you! You were sinning and that person is-" The angel's head was cut off "Oh Beleth? Why are you here?" "Huh but I thought-" He saw you bought cat food and Bathin was behind you "Was guarding them like you asked" Bathin said as he saw the angel's head in the floor "Oh."
🚬‌He likes lighting up cigarettes(this is alr obvious because of his philia), bonus if you like it too. But if you don't like cigarettes (even the smell), he'd maintain distance to respect your preference (also so you won't smell it too strongly). However if you try to smoke (or if you already do) he'd really get turn on (again this is because of his philia).
🚬‌He always likes it if you dress up like a soft boy/soft girl or lolita. He always encourages you to dress up and not be shy of your preferences, since you dress up for yourself after all.
🚬Firmly believes that Beleth only have sex with people because of the NEED to sleep. But after you're with him, man he WANTS to sleep everyday. He's so comfortable with you that he wants to sleep (literally, wholesome) with you but his insomnia is stopping him. But hey you can help him sleep tho 👀
🚬‌He's pretty naughty sometimes. He'd slap your ass jokingly if you're cooking or doing something standing up, and he won't apologize but makes the most flirtatious smirk. He would often tease you especially if it makes you pout and he'd laugh about it. He would also engage in dirty talks if he seems a bit bored.
🚬His member is pretty big, and I'd say BIG, it's probably bigger than Beel's and it's girthy. Good thing Nilfheim has good pants (fuck those pants) you can't see his bulge or whenever he's having a boner when he see you all flushed up and squirming from his dirty talks or even if you lit up a cigarette for him.
🚬‌He'd like it whenever you sit on his lap (he doesn't care if you're heavy, he's a demon with demon strength anyw). However, he will like it even more if you decide to cockwarm him. He likes seeing you squirming on his lap, begging to move. He'd grip your thighs and whisper dirty things in your ear. He'd even bite or lick your earlobe. "Mmmm Beleth please can I m-move?" "Lil oneee, you said cockwarming right? Be a good girl/boy and sit still mkay? I'll reward you later" His one hand hold your thighs, while the other wraps around your waist and he nibbles on your ear 🚬‌He's a dominant top however, if you're feeling frisky, he's willing to be submissive for you.
🚬He'd praise you and pat your head in bed. "Mmmm you're doing great little one. Hm you're so tight for me now are you, baby? That's a good girl/boy" *He pats your head and he also whispers "Do you want me to touch you, baby? Mmm you're so good for me today" ‌Prolly has size kink in addition to his philia, he likes seeing his towering figure above your small figure whenever you take him. He's favorite positions being Missionary and Side windher.
🚬‌He LOVES marking you. He's not really possessive but he always laughs and feels proud whenever someone asks you or looks at your love marks and you always become flustered to answer.
🚬After sex, he always looks at your disheveled look, like some masterpiece he made and he was the painter (i mean if cum was paint then he is). He always enjoyed looking at your cum filled holes (and body) and his marks in your body. ‌He's fond of aftercare. He'll help you clean up and take a bath or shower. You in front of him while he cleans you. He'd also prepare some comfy towels and a bathrobe before falling asleep together with you. He'd sleep hugging you with a smile in his face.
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A contribution to the WHB Server that I'm in! Hungry for Beleth for this past few days. Special thanks to my friend K for being hungry with me and reviewing some similarities we thought of Beleth. Will probably update this once i got a hold of his 100% intimacy information and voice.
Masterlist
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krisluxxeeempress · 6 months ago
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WHY ARE THEY MAD? PICK-A- PILE
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Pile One: Work Related
It appears as if you have people in your work environment MAD because they see you making more moves and less announcements these days. With great effort to not jump ahead energetically to read these cards inadvertently lets me know these people are mad because they’re watching you and still somehow confused as to how you are making more moves & advancing ahead of them. Imagine watching an entire movie and missing parts, forcing you to rewind. These people are watching you and confused as to how you are growing in your career, business, creative pursuits etc. The rewind energy I referenced in my example is what is happening to these people who are too busy watching you while they’re life is on hold and or  are being forced to re-do something that they missed in their life. ( Saturn RX energy)
 It feels like I’m writing in a circle, but I know that the energy I am picking up on from those people who are mad at you. You are running circles around these people while they’re watching you!  AND STILL, THEY DON’T SEE YOU COMING. For some of you, they are mad because you found a loophole or some kind of weakness or lack in your respective fields which is the key to your success. While everyone is doing, looking, sounding, thinking, producing the same shit ( excuse my language) you are giving what needs to be gave, effortlessly. It gives heavy unique vibes. Nothing is truly new under the sun, however, whatever it is your doing and or offering appears to be different and to your credit- I am confident it is different. AND THAT IS WHY THEY ARE MAD!! To my next point, you have these people mad because you don’t do what everyone else does. BOOM ! It’s amazing how everyone does, looks, acts, says, moves, smells, and thinks the same while simultaneously thinking they are still different. Like how? EXACTLY. ( questions that need answers) While everyone else is copying and using others for a come up or lifestyle, you seem to be getting it out the mud- quite literally.
You have literally or are in the process of drafting something from scratch meanwhile others just regurgitate basic information, products or “skills” for clout and money. I keep wanting to use the word appear and so there’s something extremely significant about appearances. ( heavy Sun | Leo energy) For those gold diggers out there, man or woman, they are mad at you because they play dummy games and are now being rewarded with dummy prizes. The card, “these hoes aint loyal” (Chris Brown vibes) came out which is why I feel there are some gold diggers in your energy MAD at you. They took the easy, predictable and trifling way out meanwhile you took the harder way, and you are managing to get further ahead ( or will be, this may be a prediction) This could even be the other way around where you come into whichever work| creative field and things start to manifest for you easier and quicker as opposed to those people who may have been doing it longer than you.
TRUST AND BELIEVE- THEY ARE MAD!!!!
Last card out: THEY HAVE TO STAY MAD
PERIOD.
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Pile Two: Single & Won't Mingle
I initially started this reading off with the disclaimer and then I deleted it. Then the energy switched just that fast and so with that being said- you have someone mad that you are not giving warnings, disclaimers, arguing, nagging or fighting for them to act right. This reading has two different scenarios- so stay with me. Some of you may not be single, however, you are dealing with someone who acts single. Feel me? We have all heard of those single married people. This can even be a situation where someone is mad because their ( baby mom or dad) child’s father or mother is acting single. The first card that came out was “ they are mad because you don’t want kids, anymore kids, or none of their kids”. You see why I’m conflicted? This is energy I’m picking up from a single person who refuses to deal with someone who has children. Or this is someone who has children with someone who is acting single.
It gets worse! Someone is mad you will not have sex with them. So, for those who do not have children or want anymore- this person is mad because you feel like that is their goal or simply you are not attracted to or making time for them for whatever reason. It’s messy and I am trying to explain this simply but there’s so many factors. NO WONDER THEY ARE MAD. Someone is also mad you know when, where and how to detach. Basically, someone is mad because you may feel like dealing with them would make things complicated and you are avoiding that outcome as best you can. Now that I follow suite and energetically detach, I can process this much better concluding that these people or person is mad because they want to be emotionally and or sexually involved in your life however, you see the red flags from miles and trials away. This person or people are mad because you are lit and won’t change for them and so this helps put things into better context now. With you being lit, this indicates that you are in a good place in your life whether that be financially, spiritually, emotionally or all the above.
Some of you are not heartbroken, missing anyone from the past or carrying any resentment in your heart. It’s like you have a clean slate in your life and you simply do not want to or are not ready to incorporate someone new or back into your life- & that’s fair. This person is mad because they cannot change your mind- aka manipulate you. This may even be people you don’t even know exist and when they see you, they get triggered because the energy you exude is giving “ fuck off” while simultaneously looking sexy or handsome as hell. No wonder you chose not to be involved; I literally could not think straight when my emotions were involved in the beginning of the reading. Everything was confusing and messy and in my personal experience and from observation- that’s usually what occurs when you get emotionally and sexually involved. Some of you may have strong Neptune, Chiron, Libra, Virgo, Pisces or 7th house placements. You have people mad because you are cautious, picky and unattainable if I’m honest. The next cards out are “ time is money, and you can lose it all and bounce back”. AMAZING . It’s clear a lot of you with this energy and mentality are bouncing back and have experienced that messy and confusing situation before when dealing with others.
With time is money, your energy now reminds me of Pile (1). You have redirected your focus into work related and creative outlets. Those creative outlets may now be work for you. If any of you have strong Neptune, Chiron, Leo, Sun etc. placements ( not limited to) it appears as if you are channeling your sexual aka creative energy into work or creativity. Which is another reason why they are mad especially if you resonate with Pile (1). I am proud of this pile because I can feel how much healing you’ve done. How much you’ve matured and how much wisdom you’ve gained.
On YouTube & TikTok, my “ Why Are They Mad” readings are quite popular however, usually someone is mad for petty, superficial and egotistical reasons. I can honestly say this is the first-time people are mad for VALID AND LEGITIMATE REASONS. I personally want someone to be mad that I’m focused, mature, creative, HEALED & HAPPY and have HIGHER STANDARDS. Hell yeah! This is truly what life is about and I can sense your Divinity. You are truly chosen, and you have DEMONS mad. Aw, I feel kindred spirits here… Just re-read this, the energy started off with low vibration and now (personally) I feel at peace.
WOW! Aw, I love you guys who chose this pile , spiritually I know you….
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Pile Three: Stepping on Necks
Wow, I don’t know where to start. ( 2 minutes later, SpongeBob narrator voice) You have the world, your neighbors, family, foes, haters, ex’s, pastors, teachers- EVERYBODY MAD because your career is taking off. This is profound because this pile is for those who have been the underdog. This pile is for those who have been struggling, overlooked and receiving the bare minimum in all aspects of life- until now. I am not the type of lie, exaggerate or only speak about GOOD THINGS to appease anyone. ( which is why I’m selectively liked) Believe me when I tell you that a major shift has and or is occurring in your life. The cards “ your ass is fatter, and you snapped back after the baby” came out. On the surface, this would mean some of you may have gained weight for a multitude of reasons. Especially if one was struggling emotionally and spiritually- you gained weight due to eating and laziness. Others you gained weight because you had a baby ( congratulations) however, I do not dwell on the surface and so these cards indicate for me that some of you astrologically speaking in a solar return or progressive chart you may have had your moon in Sagittarius, Jupiter in Aries or 1st house, Jupiter in Taurus or 2nd house , Sagittarius or 9th house , Cancer or 4th house, Moon in Cancer or 4th house. ( however, not limited to)
What this means is that you gained weight and you were undergoing spiritual awakenings with hardships. Life has been hard and for some of you, your body took a hit. With the card “ you snapped back after the baby”, that may be the case for those of you this applies to. For the emotional and stress eaters -you will notice that you are starting to lose weight or break the habits that encouraged weight gain. AND THAT’S WHY THEY ARE MAD!!!! It’s never about appearances but more so what’s going on underneath and for most of you, you were holding on and feeding negative energy that is now being released slowly but surely.  Some of you may have let yourself go and now you are snapping back, better than before. Of course they are mad about this!! Back to your career is taking off, some of you work in corporate while others work for themselves. Those working in corporations, you have always been at the bottom and making the bare minimum or simply never gained the respect that was deserved. Those who work for yourself, you have always been overlooked and paid very little if at all. Some of you may have had to go back into working 9-5 corporate jobs because your business was stagnant. People just did not want to support you at all which forced you to go back into “slavery”.
Nonetheless, this is turning around for you Jupiter style. ( or will be ) Astrologically speaking, check your outer planets- Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto – maybe even your progressive or solar return charts because however society treated you- this is changing. You will no longer have to ask for permission, meaning- you will have the financial comfort or freedom to live and afford the things you want/ need without assistance from anyone. In corporate, you may be promoted to a position to where others must report to you, or you no longer must report to someone- there’s more leeway granted to you. Entrepreneurs, this means exactly what it means. You do not have to ask for permission! Business will be getting better; energy levels will be restored, and you can come and go as you please. AND THAT’S WHY THEY ARE MAD! IT’S GIVING MORE FREEDOM THAT OTHER’S DO NOT HAVE AND ENJOYED TAKING FROM YOU OR WORKED HARD TO ENSURE YOU NEVER HAD.  Some of you have people mad because no message is the message. ( DAMN)
Intuitively, I feel like some of you may be moving, changing numbers, jobs, contact emails- the whole nine. Those who had access to you before, no longer will. Of course, people feel the energetic shift ( refer back to those outer planets I’ve mentioned) Those people who counted you out and delighted in believing you would never make progress or move forward- now see you in a different light. They now want to be part of your life and “assist” or “support” you whereas, before you did not have that “privilege”. And yet now you are becoming privileged. ( without them) They are mad you are educated. As far as I’m concerned, knowledge is power and you clearly are the most powerful currently, ready to wield that power. It’s all fun and games when the rabbit has the gun ( some of you may be seeing bunnies a lot lately) & THAT’S WHY THEY ARE MAD!
You are educated, which alludes to some of you being able to go back to school to get degrees or this could be simply be speaking on becoming a wiser person. This can also speak of having a skill or talent that you have mastered and are the best at it. Referring to Pile (1), you have a talent or knowledge that sets you apart which is or will be the key to your success. Lastly, people are mad that “ you ain’t with the bafoolery”. This gives me the vibe that you said you would do something ( like succeed) and you’re doing it. You are proving it. You are true to it. I said lastly, but there’s a bit more I want to cover. And that’s your energy- you will succeed and then some. It reminds me a lyric Drake said, mind you he’s a millionaire, successful and never has to work again but in his lyrics, he said something along the lines of “ any other rapper would have retired but I have more to accomplish”. Blah blah. That’s your energy, you will be giving way more than is expected. ( example, I wrote a whole book for this pile) You will be surpassing others and your even your own expectations. People are mad that you are independent which automatically renders the majority POWERLESS.
Most people need others to need them because it makes them feel important and of course, a need can be capitalized. This whole world thrives ON A NEED. The fact that you’ll be in a position where you are no longer subjected to others, IS POWER & THAT IS WHY EVERYBODY WILL BE MAD. It gives underdog is top dog energy. Lastly, ( truly) like Pile (2), everybody will be mad because you do not want marriage. It’s like Rhianna Vibes, she’s a billionaire and everyone expects her to be married because she has two children. If you read pile (2), you just want to remain unencumbered, detached and not tied down to anyone. Especially after you witnessed the true nature of most people. You are cautious, focused and simple do not have time or energy to invite someone into your life who can and will try to take all that you have worked for ALONE. They did not care nor were they attracted to you when you had nothing so in your mind, it’s best they KEEP THAT SAME ENERGY & THAT’S WHY THEY ARE MAD!!!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! IF ANY OF THESE PILES RESONATED PLEASE CONSIDER "HEARTING" OR REBLOGGING MY POST. I AM TRYING TO BUILD AND EXPAND MY BLOG AND I NEED YOUR HELP TO DO SO.
I OFFER PERSONAL READINGS, PLEASE EMAIL ME: [email protected]
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seetangus · 6 months ago
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I love Azula!!! Could you do one where the Reader is part of her little gang and when they go to Omashu for Mai, Azula reacts to R taking care of Tom-Tom. Like she doesn’t understand that it’s heartwarming to see R being good with kids and she knows she’s not, but she still has a random thought in the back of her mind of a “what if this would be what it’s like if we have a family together.”So, she’ll watch as R makes him laugh and even sings him a little lullaby when he starts crying, and, for a second, her calculating and ruthless demeanor changes into a sweet look at the scene and at the thought of a domestic life with R.
Dreaming of Tomorrow - Azula x reader
[Masterlist]
Azula x gn reader, no warnings
1.065 words, this was very fun to write, enjoy! ^^
You arrived in Omashu. Azula, Ty Lee and you went there to find Mai, the last member of the squad Azula wanted to assemble to track down Iroh and Zuko.
You had never met Mai as you only knew Azula since a short time, but you knew she was the daughter of Omashu’s new Governour.
Having arrived in the palace, you were escorted to the private rooms of Mai’s family by guards. Once you were inside and the doors were closed, Azula didn’t wait for any formalities and quickly introduced everyone; you greeted Mai and her parents, the Governour Ukano and his wife Michi, who was holding Mai’s infant brother, Tom-Tom.
You immediately liked them; it was rare but all the more nice to see a happy family in such a high political position.
Michi sat Tom-Tom down in a chair and excused herself and her husband, she said they needed to prepare something.
After they had left, Azula shot a glare at Ty Lee, who immediately began talking to Mai and trying to convince her to join the gang. Azula had instructed Ty Lee that she should try first because Azula knew very well that her usual ways of convincing people might not work on someone like Mai and she expected Ty Lee to have better chances.
You sat down too, not knowing what else to do with Ty Lee talking to Mai and Azula observing them. You looked around the room and noticed Tom-Tom sitting on his chair. He seemed to have noticed you too and looked at you with interested, big eyes. You smiled and waved at him, making him laugh. He stood up and began walking towards you with small, clumsy steps.
When he reached you he lifted his arms up, pointing to you. You picked him up very gently and lifted him up to your lap. He seemed to be very happy and you played with each other for a bit, and somehow it was so nice even for you!
Azula watched Ty Lee and Mai impatiently. Why did this take so long? Couldn’t Ty Lee just say what she wanted to say and convince Mai to come with her? Did she always have to be so sickeningly sweet and first talk about unimportant things like Mai’s family, her health and what her life was like? Azula could not wrap her head around how other people actually enjoyed talking about that kind of stuff. To her, it was torture, but if ‘being nice’ really, like Ty Lee said, would make it more likely to get Mai to agree, she would endure the wait.
She looked around the room to distract herself and her eyes locked on you. Were you holding that infant brother of Mai? What was his name again, Dum-Dum? Tom-Tom? Something like that. Not that she would care about some insignificant baby.
She kept looking at you though. Tom-Tom seemed to be quite happy around you. She had never realised you were so good with kids. That was probably because she had never seen you around kids. Still, something was calming about watching you and Tom-Tom. It was almost heartwarming, and she felt as if she wished she was there with you and the baby…
But why would she want to? She was confused at her thoughts. She was Azula. She was a fighter and not interested in things like babies; all they did was cry and be not useful. Playing with babies was for those weak people who valued shallow ideas like a “loving family” over strength. Her father Ozai was the only one who knew how to handle a baby! That was of course why she was the only baby that had turned into a strong human. Her mother on the other hand… well, she made Zuko. And more or less all people were like that, raising their children to be weak.
That was what she thought. However, watching you care for Tom-Tom…
Her thoughts were interrupted as Tom-Tom, whom you had put on the floor again because he wanted to walk, stumbled and fell! He started crying and you rushed to him, picking him up and rocking him gently. You wiped his tears and started humming a lullaby you remembered from when your parents sang it to you.
After a while, Tom-Tom went silent, and soon after he was already as happy as sunshine again! Ty Lee and Mai had some time ago left the room to talk about something different, but Azula was still looking at Tom-Tom and you, somehow enchanted by what she was witnessing. Her heart felt lighter when watching you and Tom-Tom play.
She had always thought badly of typical families with (loving) weak parents and (happy) spoiled children, but you made it look like a dream… was this what having a family is like? Was this what having a family with you is like? Azula felt strange at the thought. Her heartbeat got a little bit faster. This scene she watched, you playing with Tom-Tom, was something she had never seen before and she suddenly felt like there was more to life than she had thought up until this point. And she felt that she wanted to experience it herself; the joy of parents and children! A different joy than the perfectionist and pressured one she had with her father; she wanted to feel real joy, even if it was this time as a parent and not as a child. But was that even possible for her?
You cared for Tom-Tom so well…you could surely be a good parent if you had children. But could she be one too? Azula looked away, her heart becoming heavy and slow again. She could not. Obviously she couldn’t. When she walked through the streets, peasant parents shielded their children from her. They were all afraid, even the children themselves. She could never be a good parent. maybe she should just stop thinking about it. All these thoughts were making her weak. She shouldn't have considered it in the first place.
But still, the thought of being with you…
She decided to just get out of the room and wait for you. But when she sent a last, longing glance at you and Tom-Tom, she saw you smiling at her, making her heart skip a beat:
“Azula, wanna come over and play with us?”
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idk6123 · 3 months ago
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The Perfect Student & The Delinquent (Mickey Milkovich X Male Reader)
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Mickey never have been one for doing homework, or just doing anything school related at all. Some people call him stupid because of that, but he just doesn’t care. He knows how to make money and that is enough for him. He’s done with school, but school isn’t done with him. And this is school we’re talking about; they’re going to bother him about it by shoving the responsibility to someone else.
That’s when Y/N appears, one of the best students in the school. Mickey knew him. He’s a quiet kid. He didn’t find him annoying enough to beat him up, or rich enough to steal from. Thus, they never interact. However, that all starts one day, when the school hold Y/N responsible for getting Mickey’s grade up. Feeling screwed, he’s going to help Mickey without having much motivation.
“How the fuck should I suppose to know how algebra works!?”
“Maybe you know when you come to fucking class!”
“Maybe if you cut some class, you realize that’s the best way to not get your ass kicked!”
That’s when Y/N hold Mickey in a position that the punk can’t counterattack. Feeling his face against the floor, he looks at the side of eyes and look up to see Y/N, sitting on his body.
“You look like you want to fuck me.”
“Yeah, fuck you over if you don’t shut the fuck up and do your homework.”
To be honest, Mickey is quite surprised that Y/N isn’t the quiet kid he expected him to be. He thought the top student was some shy, timid guy that only wants to do homework, not a martial artist that has no time for bullshit.
“So, you want to lie down while I’m on top off you, or do you want to do something useful?”
Mickey scoffs. “Fine. Get your fat ass off me.”
“At least I got a nice ass.”
They sit down again at the couch and recontinue Mickey’s homework. As Y/N guides him, he notices how much Mickey is struggling with math, causing some frustration. Even after math, Mickey is struggling with almost every subject. English, chemistry, biology, you name it. Y/N bets the only class he can do is PE.
As Mickey continues to struggle on the task, Y/N can tell he’s going to burst out in anger anytime soon. “Let’s take a break.” Mickey looks back, staying quiet. “Got somethin’ to drink?”
“Beer is in the fridge.” Mickey answers. Y/N stands up and heads to the kitchen. “Grab one for me.”
Y/N does that, bringing back two beers. He hands one over to Mickey. After they pop off the caps, they both take a sip at the same time.
“Are you some masochist for doing this shit?”
“Nope. Just someone who hopes for a big job and get rich.” Y/N responds. “Get in a good college first though. You?”
“I just steal the money. We should stay in contact, just in case you get rich.”
Y/N chuckles. “Any chance you get any money from me if you’re either my husband or my sugar baby.”
“That’s a hard pass.”
For the rest of the day, after having their break, Y/N helped Mickey, tutoring him in about every subject. That being said, it doesn’t look bright.
-
It’s another day where Y/N helps Mickey. The straight A student made sure to reflect why Mickey isn’t doing well, not wanting to write it off with him just being dumb. Thus, after changing the homework just a bit, he manages to do something that may help Mickey.
“’In a week, your crew makes these many drug deals: 7, 5, 8, 6, 9, 4, 10. What's the median number of deals?’” This is the first question Mickey read, only thinking what happened to his homework. “What the hell is this?”
“I’m helping you. Now you can use math in your future business.” Y/N responds. “Now, try to figure it out.”
Mickey then looks back at the paper. For whatever reason, he appears he knows what he’s actually doing. He doesn’t look confused, instead he looks focused. “7 deals.”
“Right!” Y/N is happy Mickey finally got something right. “Now to the next.”
“’You got two weapons suppliers. One brings you 2x units and the other brings 3x units. If x is 5, how many total units you got?’” Mickey looks back at his tutor. “25 units.”
“Holy-” Y/N is surprised how well things are going. “Write down the solution.” Without any fuss, Mickey writes down the solution. Afterwards, he gives the paper back at Y/N. “Correct.”
Mickey smirks, grabbing the paper back. “And here people thought I was some dumbass.”
“Well, you proved them wrong.”
-
Now that every question is changed into a language into something Mickey comprehends, the speed of doing his homework changed from an entire day into 2 hours, with most of the time the questions correctly answered.
“’If you take a hit and your arm’s bleeding, which system in your body rushes to patch up the hole?’ The circulatory system.”
“’You got a new batch of goods, and you see the demand go up. If you usually move 50 units at $20 each, but now you can push 70 units at the same price, what’s the total revenue now?’ $1400.”
“If you're 'running' from the police, how do you say, 'we run' in Spanish?”
"Nosotros corremos"
Times passes quickly as Mickey completes his homework. After doing so, Y/N is wondering what kind of grade he gets. And it turns out he managed to get a…
“B+!”
Mickey looks surprised. “In total?”
“Yeah.” Y/N looks happy for his classmate. “You did great. Now you have to rely on regular questions, or you have to use your fantasy to turn it in something fun.”
“Do the second one.” Mickey answers. “To be honest, I’m surprised school can help me in my future.”
“The future full of crime.”
“Yep, and I give all the credit to you, not those assholes.” Mickey refers to the teachers without shame.
Y/N smirks. “They really are assholes. They black mailed me to tutor you, y’know?”
“They did?” Mickey is surprised, thinking it’s ridiculous. “Fucking bastards…” He then thought of something. “We should get revenge.”
“Whaddaya mean? You talking about a school shootin’ or somethin’?”
“No, just destroying the principal’s office. And for good sake, his car.”
Y/N thought about it, not declining the idea at first, causing Mickey to smile with glee. Feeling like he wants to bite back, the usually good student caves in. “Only after you ace your tests.”
Mickey offers a fist-Bumb, which Y/N accepts. “Deal.”
-
Y/N awaits outside of the classroom, wanting to see Mickey after finishing his last test. As Y/N daydream off, his eyes suddenly went wide awake when Mickey gets out of the classroom with a smirk on his face.
“And?”
“Not a problem.”
“Nice.” Y/N offers a high-five, which Mickey accepts.
“Now it’s for me to help your ass.” Mickey gestures his friend to follow him. They get to his locker, where Y/N sees multiple tools of destructions in the locker. “You’re backing down?”
Y/N grabs a hammer, checking it out. “Nah, they need to learn to not mess with me.”
Mickey looks proud. “Glad you’re not a pussy.”
After gathering their equipment, they get to the principal office. They see it’s empty, though locked. Using his lock-picks, Mickey opens the door, causing them to get access in the office. They look around, with Mickey looking back at his new delinquent friend.
“Want to do the first honour?”
Y/N holds the hammer tighter, with his eyes locking on the pc. With a heavy slam, the computer receives a massive hole, following up with another slam and another one. That’s when Y/N grabs what remained and throws it aside to stomp on it.
“There you go!” Mickey looks excited. He then gets to the desk, where he takes out all of the drawers to throw it away. “Let’s go wild!”
Chaos enfolds the entire room, as the two delinquents destroy the entire office. The shelves broken on the floor. All the files ruined and ripped apart. The chair being thorn into two. They even tagged the wall with a penis.
“You have a talent for making very gorgeous dicks.”
Mickey chuckles. “Naturally born talent.” He looks back at his friend. “And now we have made our territory.”
“Like a dog?”
“Yep.” Mickey hands move to his pants to unbuckle. He notices Y/N just standing. “You’re not joining?”
“I just think we should aim higher.”
“Like a shit?”
“No.” Y/N looks back at the desk. “Think anyone ever cummed on the desk?”
Mickey stops what he’s doing and looks back. “You want to fuck on the desk?”
“I don’t mean together.” Y/N clarifies himself, thinking Mickey is straight. “We could have turns jerking off.”
Mickey then just smirks. “Not the best time wise. It’s better we do it at once.”
“Huh?”
That’s when Mickey gets to Y/N to ambush him with a kiss, though surprised for a second, he quickly kisses back. The two guys quickly move to the table, where both guys begin undressing each other to take the ultimate insult.
-
“I think we’ve done enough orgies.”
“When is enough enough?” Mickey responds back.
They just stole the principle’s car and park it somewhere isolated, where Y/N and Mickey send another message from inside the car, multiple times.
Both guys are sitting in the front seat, where they chat as they’re covered in each other’s clothing.
“Well, I’m tired.”
“Of sex?”
“Yeah, l like it more dispersed.” Y/N grabs his boxers and put them on. “You’re one freaky shit to be able to have sex so many rounds.”
“Thanks.” Mickey merely responds. “There is more where that came from.”
Y/N hums. He grabs his t-shirt to put it on. As he does, he looks back at the guy next to him. “You’re staying naked?”
“I’m still up for one more round.”
“You really are a degenerate.” Y/N chuckles. “Well, the longer we stay here, the quicker the principle notices his car gone missing and the cops to find us.”
Mickey hums and think about it. “Right, I can’t really afford that.” That’s when he starts dressing up too.
“We can always do it another time.”
Mickey looks back to see a smirking man, giving him a smirk back. “I like the sound of that.”
-
“Got a B for math.” Mickey announces when Y/N walked in his house.
“Nice going.” Y/N looks proud. “And nice for me for being such a good and perfect teacher.”
“I wanna make a remark but consider the rest of my grades are all great, I let it pass.” Mickey goes to the fridge to grab a beer for him and Y/N. “Did you hear about principle shitface?”
Y/N smirks. “What about him?”
Mickey goes back to Y/N to hand over a beer. “Wasn’t too fond to discover cum on his desk, as well in his car.”
“Nice.” Y/N laughs. He put up his beer. “Fuck the principle!”
“Fuck the principle!”
Mickey and Y/N both cheer, celebrating their victorious, whether it’s from Mickey getting good grades, or Y/N standing up for himself, or their new find friendship that will turn into something more.
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littlenightma · 1 year ago
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Hello. I may have been obsessed with Rusty Nail for the last few hours. I wonder if you can write a Yandere Rust Nail headcanon?
Yandere!Rusty Nail Headcanons
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• Yandere!Rusty gives absolutely zero fucks and tolerates zero bullshit. All he really wants is to be left the hell alone, but it doesn’t always end up happening that way. This time, though, he was pleasantly surprised because he ended up with you. It might take a while for you to adjust to your new life with him, but he promises it’s for your own good.
• Will kill anyone like that if they upset you intentionally or not. He hates seeing your tears and how you become withdrawn with sadness. Will make you watch as he chains them to his truck and drags them down the road until there is nothing left but a trail of blood, guts, and bones. And if you get scared, he’ll console you with gentle kisses and tight hugs, rocking you back and forth until you are okay again.
• “The world is full of people like that, but don’t you worry, little one. I’ll be here to take care of ‘em.”
• If you break any his rules, he will break you back respectively. The rules are in place for a reason. They are there for your protection and for his peace of mind when he is not around and breaking them is a good way to get on his bad side (which he hates showing you) but if you can’t listen, then you’ll have to face the consequences. He has to make sure you know you’re place.
• “I know it hurts, darlin’, but you know what else hurt? That little slap you gave me when I found you.” He inspects the mark on your face. “So just consider this as me returning the favor.”
• And when you really break the rules that leaves him so pissed that he could kill someone, anyone, he ties you up naked and defenseless in his trailer. You’re hanging up by your arms, barely able to stand up straight, having to resort to using your toes. He wants you to be as uncomfortable as possible. He hates doing it and he hates that you have forced him to resort to this, but you have to learn, baby. You can see the sadness and disappointment written across his face before he goes emotionless.
• He drives and drives and drives with you bouncing in the back. Your arms hurt, your legs are tired, and you’re calling out for Rusty to stop but he ignores your cries. He keeps on driving — speeding up at some points when you become hysterical — like you’re nothing but cattle on the way to the slaughterhouse. It’s not until you have gone silent from exhaustion when the truck finally comes to a stop.
• “Have you learned your lesson?”
• You hiccup, voice barely above a whisper. “Yes.”
• “Will you try to leave?”
• “No.”
• He cups your cheek and makes you look at him. “I hate doing this to you. Don’t make me do it again.”
• If you think his punishments are bad, his rewards are far better. After a particularly rough handling session and Rusty is certain that you have learned your lesson, he does whatever he can to ease the pain and fatigue. Runs you a hot bath (provides bubbles or candles if requested) and cooks you a warm meal to have after.
• Gets you whatever you want. He is a provider at heart and provide for you he will. Price doesn’t matter to him, but he appreciates it when you bring it up anyway. You hold something for too long at the store and he’s making you put it in the basket despite your protests. You want new clothes? You got them. You want a new game that just released? It’s ordered. Whatever you want so you can live life happy and comfortable with him you will get, understand?
• This man is only truly happy when you’re happy. Ever since you came into his life he isn’t in those foul moods he often found himself in and he sees the world a little more brighter than he used to. But don’t ever think he won’t knock some heads when he needs to.
• The way your eyes light up when he presents his gifts to you makes him feel like the best man in the world and so does the combination of a tackle and a tight hug you give him to show how grateful you are. Those are the moments he lives for, too see you happy, protected, and all his.
NSFW 18+
• Will edge you like a sorry motherfucker until you are begging for his cock and relentlessly insisting that you’ll never try to leave him. Rusty is possessive and protective over his shit and the thought of you gone hurts him straight to the core. He was a lone rider for so long and he’ll be damned if he ever has to live his life without you in it.
• His cock, chain, or belt. Take your pick, baby, because either way you’re getting punished. The welts on your ass and the stinging pain on your cheek are nothing compared to the what he felt when he realized you had escaped. He thought he’d lost you, but he found you and brought you right back home, didn’t he?
• He takes you out to a field when the moon is high in the sky. He tells you to take off your clothes and lay on your stomach. You hear the unmistakable unbuckling of his belt.
• “I thought I was being good, Daddy. Am I still being punished?”
• He hushes you and turns your head. You bury your face into your arms expecting a smack, but it never comes. Rusty peppers kisses down your spine and presses his hips into yours. He gently thrusts for hours, never going at a pace that throws you two over the edge, but it still feels nice to be connected to him.
• His arms are cradling you and his chest is on your back. You feel his heat, his heartbeat, his entire body moving and all night long he’s whispering how much he loves you and that he will never let you go. You’re his baby and no one will ever take care of you like he does. He’s yours, don’t you feel it? He never wants to put his cock inside anyone else and he for damn sure never wants another cock inside you.
• “Are you ready to come with me, baby? I’m gonna fill you up so good. Let me hear you, okay? Goddamn, you look so damn beautiful taking my seed.”
• You and him come together multiple times under the moon and stars until neither of you can move. He covers you both with the blanket he brought and you fall asleep wrapped up in Rusty’s embrace thinking that being with him isn’t such a bad thing after all.
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woso-dreamzzz · 1 year ago
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Big Adventures Thoughts
So, my fics were pretty short tonight because I was stuck on a coach for six hours and couldn't write much but I do have some random Big Adventures thoughts that may or may not make it into fics at some point but I'm just going to share them all with you now 😊
I've mentioned it very briefly in an ask before but when Princesse was very young she spoke Swedish with a slight Danish accent and Magda hated it. It faded after she started living with Magda but it's always funny to Pernille whenever anyone brings it up
It's not been used a lot but moster Frido is a big part of Princesse's life. This is coming in a fic soon but after the doctors and Magda and Pernille, she's actually the next person to hold Princesse and she's the one that brings her girl-swan and girl-moose when she's a baby. Princesse adores her in the way all young girls idolise their older, female relatives and Frido's definitely the one she turns to when she's older and doesn't want to talk to her mums about certain things
Magda feels a bit inadequate sometimes (particularly early on) when she finds out just how easy Pernille and Princesse work together on things and it's a pretty steep learning curve for her but she adapts pretty quickly
Every shirt Princesse gets when she's younger, she wears to bed the night she gets it. Some shirts (like Leah's) she hoards for weeks before letting them get washed and framed if she thinks they're special enough
Princesse is deathly allergic to kiwi, banana and avocado but only slightly allergic to latex
Sometimes on the bus to away games, Princesse curls up on Jessie's lap and naps with her. Pernille has a whole photo album of pictures of Jessie and Princesse napping
The gloves that Zećira gives Princesse after the match against the USA, Princesse keeps. It becomes a bit of a superstition but before every match, she puts them on and then takes them off to put on her own gloves because she wants Zećira's good luck from that game to rub off on her
Princesse is absolutely a prodigy at keeping. Magda and Pernille debate sometimes whether there must be some kind of keeper dna in the donor they chose (because it certainly didn't come from Magda's) or whether or not it was the near hero worship Princesse has for Zećira that made her want to prove herself
Princesse's schooling ends up being a bit all over the place. She only starts school when they all move back to Germany and she only really goes in a few times a week because Magda and Pernille's schedules can be erratic sometimes and it's a bit easier to home-school her (and because of the slight separation anxiety Magda develops but will forever deny). When Magda and Pernille retire and they end up in Sweden, Princesse's time is taken up by academy training and then when she hits fifteen, professional training so she ends up taking online school
I think I've mentioned this as well but Princesse never lets in a penalty her entire career and it makes other players all the more nervous during penalty shootouts at major tournaments because she continually blocks them. It becomes kind of a thing that commentators at matches talk about in the 'is this the day someone finally scores a penalty against her' kind of way
Like Magda did, Princesse gives away her World Cup medals but this time to Magda and Pernille rather than a child of her own
Almost all of Princesse's World Cup jerseys get given away to players from her childhood (if and when she defeats their teams) while the others go to Magda and Pernille
For club football, Princesse has her first name on her back but for every international match, it's her last name
Princesse feels awkward getting praise sometimes from people that aren't her mothers which is something that carries into adulthood so, at award shows and such things, she always brings them with her because it makes her feel less awkward
Speaking of award shows, Princesse is presented with awards by both Mary Earps when she grows up along with Alexia and Aitana
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alicerosejensen · 2 years ago
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It may be possible to make a whole cycle out of this, but let's see if someone likes it)
It doesn't even have a name yet, but maybe it will appear a little later.
Warning: age difference (implied) ; Yandere! Leon; full control of the reader; a bit of psychological abuse.
(the author got a little fucked up and missed all the deadlines for laying out this strange text, but the work is killing me)
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You were emotionally dependent on him. Leon Scott Kennedy has completely taken over your life, managing you like a pet, controlling your every move. Like some kind of subcutaneous tick, he climbed deep inside you if only you were always next to him.
You don't even remember how long ago it started. What was perceived as caring was actually a huge red flag that you saw too late or Leon was just good at hiding his possessive attitude towards you. Now there's nothing to fix. The door to his office is ajar and you are not actually allowed in, but if Leon is at work it always means that his control is loosening a bit. You carefully looked through the crack and saw that he was sitting at a laptop and writing some kind of report. A pile of papers scattered all over the table indicated that it was inundated with paperwork. You didn't bother him. She just slipped past on tiptoe, trying to be as quiet as possible.
It was actually only early in the morning, but you think Leon didn't even go to bed. His fingers continued to tap on the keyboard, and he sighed deeply from exhaustion every now and then. You never got up so early and just wanted to go to the kitchen to drink some water and lie back in a warm bed. Eagerly swallowing water, you could not help but see people running past doing morning jogging, and your heart ached a little with envy.
The weather was so nice outside that you wanted to go for a run, even if you were sleepy.
"You didn't think I wouldn't see you peeping..." Leon's arms closed around your waist, holding you tight against his chest. You set your glass aside and Leon turned you around holding your chin. "What if someone saw my sweet girl in her underwear?"
Oooh, it was strictly forbidden, something that could have pissed off Leon in a split second if a man running past saw you standing in panties and a tank top.
You remained silent, apologetically lowering your gaze. Leon just sighed and reached for your lips, planting a kiss in the very corner. "You always have to be watched over." Leon let out a sort of disappointed yet relieved sigh as he pulled you into a hug, resting his head on the top of your head.
It kills. Sucks out life. He has made you a helpless child who cannot take a single step without him.
"Let's go to bed," a shiver ran through your body. "Be a good girl to me. I love you so much"
He pulled off your shirt, making you shiver in the cool air. Leon picked you up in his arms, carrying you back to the bedroom, where he gently laid you on the bed and began to undress himself to lie under the covers.
"Sweetheart," His voice sounded uncomfortably in his ear as Leon practically lay down on your back, hugging your waist like you were his favorite pillow. His lips found your neck as a hand from your waist moved to your thigh, tugging at the elastic of lace panties, pulling them off your legs. “My poor baby, you can’t do without me at all, am I right? How can I let you go somewhere alone if something is sure to happen to you?"
Tears flowed from your eyes. You could... you were on your own before you met him, but now? A huge part of you no longer belongs to you. You don't have a job, because he knows how to persuade ... you remember just a touch and a gentle, begging whisper over your lips when he towered over you. Leon knows how to drive crazy, knows how to take what he wants and left everything for his hugs. Leon has a very sick concept of love.
"I don't want that kind of relationship, Leon..." You croaked, knowing in advance that it was a failed attempt. Leon just turned you around kissing your forehead and you could feel his muscles tensing up. He never hit you, but his pressure was much worse.
"What relationship do you not want?" Leon's serious voice made you tremble. "Am I treating you bad? You don't even have to do anything. What's on your mind again?"
Silence. Leon seemed to have a counterargument to any of your claims after which you felt terrible. It’s as if you are ungrateful, and he is a dream man who gives everything you want and really Leon never limited you in money: the best outfits, expensive gifts, any purchases. He was much older than you and your friends always thought that you just found yourself a sugar daddy who pays you everything. Oh, how wrong they were!
He adored you to the point of some hidden madness.
Leon kept saying that he was already tired. That his job has taken a normal life away from him, but you don't even know what he does. Working for the government has a somewhat vague concept. And, probably, this work did something with his psyche, if he has some kind of unhealthy mania to keep you away from everyone and always next to him.
"So what kind of relationship do you want?" Again he asks the question. "Talk to me"
"Why are you doing it?"
"Doing what?" Leon turned you around, pressing you to his chest as if you were some kind of child, and his eyes seemed to have grown rough.
You knew it was useless. That even if you leave and try to return to your old life, Leon will make it so that you can't live without him. You loved him before the manifestation of all the red flags, and now you yourself did not know how you feel for him.
"I want to go out, spend time with friends, work... I can't be..."
"Oh, what a silly girl you are." Leon sighed wearily, but his voice softened. He pulled you closer to him, lightly stroking your hair. "But I understand. You just didn’t see what I saw. In fact, you should be glad that I take care of you. Everything I do is only for your benefit, and am I forcibly keeping you at home? We can go for a walk a little later, and you don’t need to work at all. Anything can happen there, and I won’t be there to protect you. Plus, I fully provide for you." Leon took a deep breath, closing his eyes, holding you tightly by his side.
He did not beat you, did not starve you, did not humiliate you, but destroyed you slowly and morally. You buried yourself in his broad chest, wondering if it's okay to accept such love? A love in which all your actions must be approved by Leon...
You can't go anywhere without his permission. But maybe you just need to learn to accept his love? In the end, which of the men will care about you so much? Maybe you're really lucky to have met Leon?
"What are you thinking about," Leon literally felt your excitement, as if some kind of sensor was built into him. He pulled back a little to look into your eyes.
"About nothing," you lied, but Leon knew you too well.
"You know I don't like being lied to!" A shiver ran through your body at his insinuating voice. "Look at me"
"I'm not lying, it's just that you... control me all the time"
"Does my concern feel like control?" You looked up at him, meeting his beautiful eyes, which were genuinely offended, and yet they looked too attractive. His bangs fell into his eyes as he chuckled bitterly. "Sweetheart, you're just too young. I don't blame you, but without me, what are you going to do? Working as a waitress in a cheap diner and smiling at horny bastards who dream of groping you? You're only my girl, and no one has the right to touch you".
His overprotection was depressing. Leon wrapped his arms around your hips, hovering over you, making you dependent on him. His excitement grew with every second from the sight of your naked body. Leon was possessive. Until you started living together, he did not show this trait of his character much, but later this quality manifested itself more and more clearly. Do you still remember when your college friend picked you up for fun, throwing you over his shoulder and what a scandal Leon gave you at home, bringing you to tears. The wall is still dented from his fist, making you wince every time you see it. Kennedy had a sick attachment to you mixed with the fear that you would leave him and never love him again. That you will find yourself another man, one of your peers, but that day you assured him with tears in your eyes that you did not cheat on him. Leon yelled at you so hard that your legs were bent and you sat on the floor when he swung at you for the first time. Pressing a palm to a blazing cheek. It was the first and last time he hit you in a fit of jealousy. Leon himself was frightened of what he did, his subsequent concern and scattering of comforting compliments could not make you forgive him for this, and this burden still hangs on you like a heavy stone.
You cried as he gently made love to you, kissing the tears from your face as he impaled you on his cock. His silent apology touched your lips, smearing the blood from your split lip. Even when your tears dried, leaving behind a salty crust, Leon still continued to fuck you, covering your face with endless kisses and forcing you to close your eyes from a single phrase said in your ear.
"Pretty girl. You will always be mine. I'm so sorry, but I won't let anyone else touch you anymore. You are mine, okay?"
He took care of the aftercare, but it wasn't the Leon you knew. But it became scary when, standing in the shower, you told him that you were leaving, because of which he pressed you with all his might to the shower cabin, grabbing your face with his hands, turning it to him.
"You won't go anywhere! You are mine and no one else's. Don't make me do things I might regret."
Since then, he has taken complete control over you, covering it up with care. Leon did not take your phone, but you were sure that he connected something to it in order to view your messages. Friends constantly called you to parties, but Leon forbade you - his one eloquent look spoke a lot if you disobeyed him.
Part of you hated him, and for some reason, another part of you always looked for warmth and care from him.
"I just want to take care of you," he said as he nestled between your legs. "Don't say such words to me. My little princess, someday you will understand that I'm only protecting you. The outside world is very dangerous and cruel, but I'm glad that I kept my innocence. Without me, you will die"
"Why do you say that?" you asked, but instead of words, he grabbed you in an armful literally to the crunch of the ribs and for some time silently lay burying his nose in your neck. His hands dropped to your hips as he parted your legs, slowly covering your jawline with kisses.
"Because I love you" he slightly raised himself on his hands, burying his nose against your cheek, leaving another weightless kiss on it. “And you love me, and the sooner you realize that, the better it will be for us.”
You doubted when you looked at him. You doubted when returned his kiss and arched under his caresses, however, under them, doubts usually began to dissipate in your head. Like a hard drug, Leon caused intoxication, and if you now say these cherished words, then your golden cage will be closed forever and you will be the one who throws away the key to it.
"I'm sorry," Leon whispered, caressing you. “I shouldn't have done this, and I know you're still mad at me. I swear it won't happen again... but I can't watch anyone other than me touch you."
He really didn't mean to hurt you. Let him still have an unhealthy mania for you. A sick desire to own you and be loved by you, and yet Leon would kill any person if he were now preferred to another. But in those moments, you felt comfortable with him. You calmly fell asleep in his arms and your body still sensitively reacted to his touch. You also had a strange addiction to this man that you are trying to overcome and you also want him to never let you go.
"You have everything you want. I only ask you for love and devotion to me"
Isn't it true?
You fell into the soft pillows, feeling Leon throw your legs over his back, hovering over you. He runs his hands over your shoulders, belly, stroking them making you feel his tension building at the sight of your naked body.
And for some reason it seems to you that you won’t be able to get out ... Perhaps it’s better not to resist and accept his love as it is, than to wake up an animal in him that will take away the last remnants of freedom from you. Leon has a goal to make you dependent on him and he is ready to resort to any means to achieve it.
"You belong to me, and I belong entirely to you. We won't ruin it, just because there's a lot more you don't understand. Be a good girl to me, okay?"
And surrendering to his arms, you understand that you really do not have a big choice.
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svltzmans · 1 year ago
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take care - f.g.
a/n: i'm so grateful for these fiona requests, thank you so much! writing for her is comforting for me ❤️‍🩹 i promise i'll get back to writing for other characters soon though!
warnings: reader is sick (but it all turns out fine!), very fluffy of course (not proofread though)
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when y/n wakes up in a cold sweat, she can tell something is terribly wrong.
each swallow feels like a mouthful of glass, breathing through her nose is impossible, and her body feels like it's engulfed in invisible flames.
forcing herself to turn to read the clock, she sees that it's still the middle of the night. 2:30 a.m., to be exact.
how could she have gone to bed a few hours ago feeling completely fine?
y/n's first instinct is to grab her phone and text the only person she knows who may be awake at this hour. solitude isn't exactly her favorite, especially when she's sick. she could use someone to chat with.
are you awake?
she clicks send, rolling back over onto her pillow. she's exhausted, yet sleep seems impossible. before she can even think about trying to fall back asleep, her phone dings.
what's going on? it's late baby.
her girlfriend, fiona, is usually quite the night owl. she spends most of her days catering to other people, including her siblings, so her evenings are the time she reserves for herself.
is it healthy? probably not. fiona finds time to sleep at some point in her busy life, and y/n tries not to think about it too much to avoid the inevitable worry she would feel.
i think i have the flu or something.
fiona writes back almost immediately.
i'm coming over.
y/n forces herself to sit up, realizing that her girlfriend is probably being serious.
fi, it's the middle of the night.
go to sleep and you can come in the morning.
hello?
y/n knows it's no use, and she's proven correct when she hears a light knock on the door.
when she opens it, fiona is standing in the hall with several cans of soup, an entirely-too-big box of medicine, and a 12-pack of sports drinks.
"you're out of your mind," y/n laughs, voice scratchy.
"i am not, my girl is sick and i'm taking care of her."
"what about the kids?" y/n feels concerned realizing the rest of the gallaghers are alone in the house.
"they're asleep, first of all," fiona laughs. "but i asked v to make sure everything is fine. she's awake too, believe it or not."
"where did all this stuff even come from?"
"24 hour stores are a thing, you know. any further questions?" fiona laughs at her own sarcasm before grabbing hold of y/n's hand.
"c'mon, you're getting back in bed."
"i'm awake now, though."
"not for long, pretty girl," fiona replies.
before she knows it, y/n is in fiona's arms, being carried bridal style to her bedroom.
fiona sets y/n on the bed gently, pulling the covers over her.
"aren't you gonna get in too?"
"well duh, i didn't come here for nothing. but i'm going to get you medicine first."
when fiona returns, she's carrying a bowl of soup, along with the medicine she promised and a glass of water.
"i thought you were just getting me medicine," y/n teases, seeing that fiona had outdone herself.
"you know i can't help myself. now, take this and eat your soup."
fiona sits next to y/n in her bed, pushing her hair behind her ears and planting a gentle kiss on her forehead.
"jesus, you're burning up. my poor girl," fiona coos, wrapping her arms around y/n.
"fi, i'm gonna spill the soup."
fiona pulls away, forgetting that y/n's hands were very much occupied with a hot bowl.
she can't help but giggle as y/n drinks some of the broth before putting the bowl on her bedside table and returning fiona's hug.
"can we watch a movie?" y/n asks, even though she already knows the answer.
"you have to pick it though, you know i'm indecisive," fiona responds before leaning in to kiss y/n.
"fi! you're gonna get sick!"
"i don't care and you know it. wanna kiss my girl."
melting at fiona's words, y/n allows fiona to kiss her, feeling her body heat up and knowing it isn't because of her fever.
when y/n and fiona finally separate, y/n turns on her television, resting her head on fiona's shoulder.
"lay down, silly," fiona insists, letting y/n rest her head on her chest.
"can we watch that musical? the one about the wedding on the island or whatever?"
"babe, we watched 'mamma mia' last time i was here."
"i'm sick, you can't say no to me."
"i can't say no to you ever. i'll put it on, you rest."
20 minutes into the film, y/n had already fallen asleep, her head still rested on fiona.
fiona smiles to herself, admiring her sleeping girlfriend. it isn't long before she falls asleep herself, arms around y/n.
y/n wakes up the next day to find that it's already after noon, and that she's actually starting to feel better.
her nose had cleared significantly, and although her throat was still sore, she considered it a win.
finally standing up and walking to the kitchen, she's surprised to see fiona hovering over the stove, evidently cooking.
"good morning, sleepyhead. how you feelin'?" upon closer inspection, y/n sees that fiona is cooking pancakes.
"better, actually. i can't believe you left me in bed alone, though," y/n teases, wrapping her arms around fiona's waist from behind.
"only to make you breakfast, my love. or lunch, seeing as you slept until 12:30."
"i forgive you, but only because the food smells good."
"oh, just be quiet and eat your pancakes."
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riririnnnn · 10 months ago
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As I mentioned in my post earlier:
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His cuff (that thing around his neck) is near transparent which gives us a lot of room to ponder since we don't exactly know what this chain even represent.
Taking Hiori as an example, let's suppose the chain represents the burden that holds back someone's true ego.
His cuff being transparent gives us two things:
1. It might be plastic which doesn't really make any sense if I were to be honest.
2. It is glass which makes a lot of sense because how's glass? Hell yeah, my geniuses, glass is really fragile which completely fits into what he said:
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Further, in that volume cover, he has pulled down his collar which puts a lot of spotlight into his blue rose tattoo, and we all know what that tattoo symbolises for Kaiser.
In case you don't remember: Kaiser got this tattoo as a reminder to himself to never fall back into his weak mentality because Blue Rose symbolises the achievement of impossible, and he saw it as an example to turn impossible to reality since Blue Rose, itself, is artificial and defies the natural order.
What is said above can be found with a quick Google search:
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But what grabbed my most attention is this panel:
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WHY?
If he only wanted to push the soccer industry to despair, then why he is adamant about winning the Champions league and the World Cup?????
Also, contrary to popular beliefs, I don't actually think Kaiser has a superiority complex because, look:
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What Chris said could be considered as an exaggerated way to rile someone, but isn't this, indirectly, exactly what Kaiser says after the Manshine City match ended?
Kaiser said something along the lines of, "BM's main character is Noa and it's impossible for me to be the current number one, that's why I came to NEL to use Isagi as a way to increase my value." He even went as far as to say that he is a secondary character in BM because BM is Noa's team.
I don't think so that anyone with superior complex will admit such real facts.
Further, why did he got so angry when Chris said those things? Isn't someone bound to be angrier if the other one was to point out their obvious weak point? So, does this mean, Kaiser actually got an inferior complex?
I'm not a psychologist, so I'm not dwelling too much into it.
However, there is another thing I want to point out:
So, because of that spreadsheet/official art of a very damaged soccer ball beside Kaiser's foot, the Fandom widely believes that Kaiser was poor while growing up .
BUT!
Being poor as a backstory has already been used three times: Naruhaya Asahi, Noel Noa, and Lorenzo Don.
I understand that in any sector with a lot of money and/or fame, there are many people who come from a poor economic background, but this is fiction, baby. No author wants anything be repeated to the point it feels overused.
That's why, I highly believe that Kaiser was either bullied or mistreated by his seniors when he started playing soccer which explains that he practiced fucking hard that the soccer ball was damaged, and also his supposed hatred towards the soccer industry. It also explains his long, unkempt hair because he was too indulged in practice.
OR!
It goes a bit darker, so proceed with caution:
Soccer somehow destroyed his family's peace just like the brotherhood of Itoshi brothers.
I may write about others in another post, but in this post, I would like to think that the person who destroyed his family's peace was his own father. It could be that his father was a soccer player himself and due to some circumstances, he fell off the soccer industry which took a toll on his mental health, and he started physically abusing either Kaiser, his mom or both.
Why physical abuse? Because Kaiser is shown having an affinity to choking.
If we get our minds out of the gutter, then there have been instances when he choked himself because he was frustrated. Also, didn't he say that he stroked his rose tattoo as a good luck before matches and compared it to, "as if tightening a noose," or something.
That's why, I kinda think that, AT LEAST, someone has choked Kaiser as abuse/bullying.
I'll rant about the above thing in another post tomorrow or some time later because I don't want this post to be too long, and also because I'm hungry af.
.
.
.
I remember a vivid dream when Kaiser threatened me to join BM.
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