#“i forgive you kitten” is so fucking funny btw

[mizzle-moths]

looking at this example photo on the preoder site. screaming sobbing crying losing my mind. odile......

[botan-shirabuki]

Soi and Mitsuhide SFW/NSFW headcanons 😭💖

I would get hit by a bus for these two. They don't have to be in danger or anything, just in general.

SFW

-They're generally very well liked by the people in town, so when word got out that they were together, most people were so happy for them. Soi's favorite grocer even gave her a congratulatory discount the day they found out. Soi gets embarrassed by all the attention, but Mitsuhide takes it in stride. After all, when you've got It...you've Got It.

-Soi is a total geek-ass dweeb nerd about food. Like, yeah duh, she's a chef but it goes deeper than that. She reads so much about food and how recipes work that she can list trivia off the top of her head. Whenever her and Mitsuhide eat together, she'll usually begin each meal with some Fun Facts™ about what they're eating. Mitsuhide is so wholly enamoured with everything she tells him so he just sits and listens intently. If he asks her a really good question she goes !!!!! And she starts to go off on a tangent. He has to remind her that they're about to eat sometimes so the food doesn't go cold.

-Mitsuhide kept his love for cats from her for quite a while. "I wanted you to have sex with me." When she found out, she started feeding stray cats along with him. Her cat voice is nowhere near the level of his, but she tries her best. She actually used to be low-key scared of cats after she saw one maul a rabbit when she was younger, but seeing a herd of them around Mitsuhide being cute and fuzzy and meowing helped her get over that.

-Once they get to Sakamoto, they got the opportunity to foster a mother cat who had an injured leg and her kittens back to good health. It was a really hectic time in the castle because the kittens ended up being pretty energetic and many of their retainers ended up chasing them all around. But everyone in the castle grew so attatched to them so some of their retainers and maids ended up taking the kittens home themselves once they were old enough. Soi and Mitsuhide kept the mother and one of the kittens themselves until [DATA EXPUNGED]

-Speaking of the cats, Soi gets to hear all of his corny jokes that they do. Sometimes he'll feed the cats alone so he can practice getting the punchline right before he tries them on her. The thing is, Soi finds the way that he tells the joke funnier than the joke itself. If he finds a joke particularly funny and no one else is around, he'll be chuckling to himself and then he'll stop. And then he'll think about it and start laughing again. And then he'll get her attention; so she turns around, trying to act like she hasn't heard him snickering to himself, and asks him what is it. He proceeds to tell her a joke that she's heard before (maybe even delivered better) but the way he's clearly trying so hard not to crack up and ruin it makes her double over every time. Mitsuhide assumes he killed that shit and they both laugh together. Everyone wins!

-he loves playing with her hair. It's so soft and is such a pretty color when it catches the sunlight. He often runs his fingers through it and will tuck it behind her ears and set it back in its place when it gets messed up by the wind or Inuchiyo. Sometimes if they're sitting outside together he'll start braiding it, though it usually unravels. He can only imagine what it was like when it was long.

-They end each day by talking to each other about how their days went over tea and snacks. It's such a nice stress relief for the two of them and a guaranteed way for them to spend time with each other no matter how eventful their days are.

-Soi has the STRONGEST legs from how good she's gotten at jumping to conclusions. She doesn't mean to, but Mitsuhide means so much to her that her mind tends to go all over the place when he leaves any questions unanswered. Mitsuhide has no problem answering them when she confronts him though. He thinks she's cute when she realizes she was being overdramatic.

-It's a whole part-time job keeping Soi out of danger, whether it's holding her up when she trips on something, or keeping her from throwing a gourd full of deer piss at some scoundrels while they're visiting the capital. Soi gets very embarrassed and frustrated by him always needing to save her or stop her bc she doesn't want him to think of her as less than, or as a child he needs to babysit. Of course, Mitsuhide doesn't mind. Though he often looks exasperated or stressed out by these situations, he admires how impulsive she is. He doesn't want to see her hurt, of course, but that look of self-righteous determination she gets before she does something without thinking is one of his favorites.

-Soi is a very Sensitive Soul, but she tends to hold in her emotions. They've had to really work on communicating properly so that they don't get hung up on minor misunderstandings. Especially after Mitsuhide absolutely slam dunked on Soi's feelings for him. And when she was down, he proceeded to stomp on them, steam roll them, panini press them, tap dance and then finally crip walk on them. She's still not over that so they're working through it. Mitsuhide takes extra care not to hurt her anymore than that, because nothing ruined him like the look on her face at that teahouse 😔

NSFW

-They're both the most stressed people you'll ever meet (Mitsuhide from work and Soi from raw, unfiltered neurosis) and they've become each other's favorite form of stress relief. Those aforementioned nightly visits often escalate very quickly.

-Growing up, Soi never had an actual idea of what sex was. She knew it was something that couples did and that it was a section of the bookstore she wasn't allowed in. So at first, she was very hesitant to do anything too crazy with him even though they were a couple so in theory it was okay, but she didn't know what it would lead to or what the end goal was, if not a baby. But then Mitsuhide made her cum for the first time and she was like "OH THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN MISSING OUT ON!!!!!" And she's been a bust down ever since.

-They both dedicate themselves to being the perfect lover. Soi has finally steeled herself to go into the forbidden section of the bookstore and pick up relevant editions of The Lover's Guide. She's that girl who practices facial expressions and flattering positions in the mirror. Mitsuhide also reads All The Books. He's learned not to take advice from Nobunaga, Katsuie, or Hideyoshi because none of their tips are really His Style™. He also often finds himself thinking about how he can use his training to better his performance.

-They both masturbate (also, Mitsuhide taught her how to touch herself) during long bouts where they don't get to see each other. When they finally get to see each other again they're both really bashful, but Soi will end up blurting out that she thought about him while she did and then she'll kick herself for letting that slip out because she doesn't want to come across as desperate. But after a moment, he'll be like "Oh good, I thought of you too!"

-They're very sexually intense people. The sheer level of smoulder between them is INSANE. It's like when they're intimate, it's as if there aren't enough things they can do to show how much they love each other. It isn't enough to just fuck her through the floor. It isn't enough to leave her covered in hickeys and bruises. Soi likes to feel like he's trying to murder her with his dick. She also tends to cry when it's that good, but it's never from sadness. Mitsuhide has learned to just keep fucking her through it until she's nice and sated again 😌

-While Soi does like it rough, she doesn't want him to say anything degrading or mean. Mitsuhide will tell her she's beautiful after he slaps her. Or he'll tell her how good of a job she's doing while he fucks her face. Positive reinforcement is key :) Also, he never leaves any orifices sore because he's learned the RIGHT way to do all this. And he'd never forgive himself if he hurt her in a way that was truly unpleasant.

-Mitsuhide never speaks a single word about what they do to anyone in the castle. He would never put her on blast like that bc it's corny. However, Soi does have Oichi and a few maids that she's close with that she confides in. She intended to keep it secret too, but of course she went and accidentally implied that she likes auto-erotic asphyxiation so the cat was out of the bag. As far as she's concerned, her business is safe with them, though.

-Ever since she has become Aware, Soi has become a royal tease. Nothing too dramatic, she just knows what looks to give him and how to move while she serves Lord Nobunaga's dessert to make his resolve and self control go *Roman Holiday noises*. He gets her back every time without fail.

-They aren't exhibitionists, but they do often end up fucking in risky public/semi-public places (i.e., that dungeon, on the veranda, in an alley at night, on a balcony, in an empty room in the middle of the day......if you fuck on the shores of Lake Biwa and nobody is around, did it really happen?)

-Mitsuhide is a switch, and they've toyed with the idea of changing things up, but Soi would want nothing more than to give him the equal amount of pleasure that he gives her, and she doesn't trust her physical ability to do so. She's also not that good with rope and dildos are intimidating. They've decided that it's best to let her lead the way and tell him exactly what she wants (which btw, took her SO LONG to be able to do bc she's got so many hang ups lol). It's really helped her figure out what she really wants and likes. And although she usually just ends up requesting that he manhandles her anyway, it's reassuring to both of them that she chose for it to be that way.