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#“go fuck yourself... sir” kinda shit???? lmfao
citrine-elephant · 19 days
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but why is it fun to write leon throwing a fuckin tantrum?
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hongism · 2 years
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yall know what time it is. ITS BREAKING THE ASKBOX TIME SJJSKALALALKAKSKWLWMNSNDDJKDK
honestly i expect nothing short of a masterpiece the moment i saw the notification. YOU! DO! NOT! DISAPPOINT! EVER! MISS CALY!!!
before getting into the crazier bits of this chapter, i wanna acknowledge how much you’ve grown as a writer during this series 🥹 recently i started re-reading some of the older moc chapters, and not to say that your writing wasn’t great before in any way, but the way you write now is so much more refined and beautiful, and i guess some of that is also attributed to how intense the story line and characters have developed. seriously, i’m so grateful to be able to read something and feel just how much effort and love the author has poured into in. now i can go on and on about praising your talent but i digress for the sake of discussing more… pressing issues that goes on here :)
*SPOILER ALERT FROM THIS PART*
now that jisung, hyunwoo and even hyunjin (sadly) has reached their demise, it finally dawns on me that this really is an end of an era. we spent like the past 1 or 2 maybe even 3 acts going through a gazillion emotional roller coaster rides all caused by jisung, but now is it weird that i’m kinda sad that he’s gone? it’s a perfect ending since jisung will probably never get his redemption even if he lives, but idk, i think it’s kinda depressing how love makes you do crazy shit :/ hyunwoo, on the other hand, BYE YOU ASS LMFAO WELL DESERVED. the only thing that dude has is the fucking audacity until the very last minute.
the action scene was beyond immaculate just as the emotional ones and there’s no doubt about that. im writing this with metaphorical tear streaks down my face and a broken heart after reading the whole chapter. you’ve got a way with words that can make me feel like i’m living and breathing in this fictional world. also, can we talk about this:
“Give me what’s mine first”
“Let her go immediately, you dog, or I’ll put a bullet in your head too.”
WELL GOD DAMN SIR. i’m gonna be fr and say i was SO certain we’re finally gonna get the infamous, long-awaited scene that must not be named between captain and ghost, but that’s on for me for not taking the slow burn warning more seriously lol. BUT there is still hope, i mean our mc would not be our mc if she can resist temptations and mind her own business yk.
"All these pit stops, huh? You sure she's the one trying to save you here, Captain? Because it looks an awful lot like that's what you're trying to do to her instead."
"Nightingale"
“I'm going, I'm going!”
and THIS IS ADORABLE OMG?!/?? i swear this whole part and the next part here is a prophecy that they’re gonna get it.
Yet, what you see before you is a trap, one carefully set by a vulnerable yet volatile man who could easily turn the situation into one that is advantageous to him permanently and you briefly. You imagine he has been in this position before — one where he can take as he pleases without thinking of the consequences of his actions — and where you stand, in a vulnerable spot yourself, you feel that tug to be near someone on equal footing. Wonder persists in your mind as you question where that is how Yunho initially fell into bed with him some time ago, or even further back to the first time Seonghwa was with him.
my girl has got some resolve and dignity alright, but we’ll see how long that lasts hahasksjak. we still probably got around 100 more chapters lol but just so you know, you’re gonna have to expect more than a broken askbox when that happens. everyone here will go so insane we might accidentally report you for emotional damage /hj. this is more than enough rambling but PLEASE I CAN NOT WAIT FOR MORE YOU’RE A LITERAL GODSEND THANK YOU LOVE YOU <3 - 🌊
OMGOMG okay i’ve been trying to answer this ask for like 2-3 weeks now but tumblr kept making it disappear from my inbox i was legit losing my mind?? but god bless today... today it worked... so finally i can respond... 
thank you for waiting for me so sorry tumblr was a bitch and didn't let me respond sooner </3 i was legit so sad it kept disappearing bc i wanted to answer SO BAD LSKDFJFLK thank you thank you first off in this past few days i'e received so much lvoe and compliments on my writing, and i've been told many lovely things and i know you sent this ask a while back but man it still means so much to me i'm still so grateful the words hold just as much meaning to me i really truly appreciate them and you!!!
now onto the spoiley bits... you're spot on! this is the end of an arc in its own regard where we've been in this storyline for such a long while by now that it's a bit like wow! that's over! i've been loving seeing the mixed bag of reactions about jisung, truly, the overwhelming majority are upset over his death even if he was a villain in many regards and that is super fascinating to me and frankly that was my goal i was trying to achieve! switching the perspectives of jisung vs hyunwoo, i wanted to play with that concept and i couldn't be happier with the outcome!
hongjoong and mc have such a fun dynamic and push-and-pull to play with too i adore it and i adore seeing everyone react to that as well, especially with recent chapters ofc.. but she's a strong one! she's resisting well! she's still got her resolve and her dignity both buttttt we'll see how much longer that lasts :3
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ji4yvns · 2 months
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what’s happening. i’m so SO tired of people like “oh haha ‘he smirked’ or ‘he sneered’” and low key making fun of these phrases i use in my writing yall making me so stressed about using these descriptions 😭
atp if an author uses these phrases it’s just cringe and what??? “he hissed” yeah well obviously the character isn’t a fucking cat. do people lack imagination or just lack comprehension or something like… clearly you guys have never read any piece of literature in your life to just have a problem with that
and on that note WHAT PHRASES DO I FUCKING USE???? atp everything and every sentence writers use are cringe like man go write your own book and see for yourself 🎀🎀🎀🎀
and yeah it’s a joke until just like EVERY single sentence is just like. “oh wtf haha that’s so weird i never fucking read a book before this is so cringe and “ WHAT?????
and what’s with the “his eyes darkened” and people being like… i mean they’re PHYSICALLY DESCRIBING how the eyes darken and how the “pupils dilate” like BRO that’s not how it works(in my opinion, i honestly… respect that interpretation of the phrase but BAHAHAHA) it’s figurative and this pisses me off for some reason lmfao (i mean like if that’s the only way you can think of that phrase… you do you??? 🤷🤷) it just blows my mind how people interpret these things which is interesting but I NEVER EXPECTED LIKE THAT EXPLANATION FOR SUCH A FIGURATIVE(or literal if you take it that way) SENTENCE
and like. making fun of “he growled” yeah it’s funny but then i’m writing all of a sudden and i want to describe a gravelly or dark voice and suddenly i’m like “so what do i use instead of ‘growl’” 😭😭😭 HELP ME (and considering people making fun of “snarled” and shit and now i just have an incomplete sentence and my writing is just trash)
yeah. “sir you’re not an animal” THE WRITERS FUCKING KNOW THAT FUUUUAAAUUUHHHHGGG
(but yeah it’s kinda funny when you think of them foaming at the mouth and growling like a feral animal… until people actually start believing that’s what the characters are doing)😔😔
i’m not trying to take this seriously and i understand this is a joke! but if you’re going to take things like “he smirked” or “he pursed his lips” I KNOW RIGHT LIKE TRUST me i’ve seen people make fun of these phrases like what is so weird to you?????????
again i understand making fun of it is funny like he growled, hissed, barked but honestly um. people are just making fun of regular phrases and taking them the opposite way they’re supposed to mean.
please tell me i’m not like alone in all this FUCK 😭😭😭😭😭
anyways i really just needed to say that LMAOOOO
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ddejavvu · 2 years
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oh mother of fuck u have no idea how out of place it feels sending u something about nsfw but ik that u do that here so im sending u this (my apologies😀) & running away 🏃‍♀️🏃🏃‍♂️
but i think a concept thats kinda funny kinda spicy is hotch & bau reader having a professional relationship surface level, but under that hotch having like.,,., a embarrassingly large crush on them and one night just,,, j🅰️ckin 0ff to the thought of them and then struggling to make eye contact with them the next day at work cause the night before is all he can thing abt lmfao 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
baby don't feel out of place i literally get the horniest shit in my inbox every single day
this post is 18+, minors dni.
"Come in." Aaron's brow furrowed as his fingers tightened slightly around the pen in his grasp. He hadn't remembered calling anyone in to see him.
The door to his office cracks open, creaking slightly on the hinges as you make yourself known, "Sorry to interrupt, sir. I was wondering if we could go over my performance review earlier than we'd planned?"
Right. Your performance review. It was scheduled for three in the afternoon, but here you were at 9AM.
"I suppose so." Aaron felt something stirring below his gut as you turned to shut the door behind you, your pants shifting around the globes of your ass. He'd imagined squeezing that same flesh just last night, imagined how each curve would feel while they were squeezing his cock.
He'd been so lost in thought that you'd settled into your chair in front of his desk without him noticing, and his stationary eyeline just happened to be right where your neckline landed when you sat. Your shirt was low-cut, still professional, but definitely not a turtleneck. It gave him the slightest hint of cleavage, and he felt his cock twitch in his pants, stirring to life.
"Are you sure this is okay?" You ask, as he clears his throat, shuffling through papers to find your files.
"It's fine, Y/L/N." He dismisses, sending you his version of a smile, "You saved me from having to do more paperwork."
You let out a sympathetic giggle at that, settling back into your chair as he shuffles through the papers.
"Well I'm sure you know we've had minimal issues with you," He glances teasingly over the stack of papers, "There's not many problems here to discuss."
"Sir, if you're going to bring up the time I sassed that detective," You start, bringing a thumb up between your lips as you gnaw on the nail there, "I sent a formal apology to their department and it was cleared, I promise it won't happen again."
Aaron's eyes trail your movements, the way that your soft, plump lips bend under the weight of your thumb. Your teeth show as they scrape against your nail, and your voice comes out muffled as it moves around the finger in your mouth.
You take his silence for sternness, and nervousness brews in the pit of your belly, "I'm very sorry, sir, I know it was unprofessional."
He blinks, snaps out of it, and realizes he's hard beneath the desk. He scoots forwards slightly, locking eyes with you again and shaking his head, "It's fine. I hate to fuel your fire but he deserved it. Just try not to do it again."
"What if I do it again and just don't get caught?" You raise an eyebrow cockily, leaning forward to joke with him. The sight makes his stomach bottom out, and he feels the urge to lean forwards, not back like he should.
"As long as I don't have to deal with it, that's fine." He lets himself laugh, delighting in the soft smile it spreads over your face, your eyes crinkling at the edges, "You're a good agent, Y/L/N, I'm glad you're with us."
"Me too." You beam at him warmly, "Thank you, Hotch."
He wants to correct you. Aaron, he thinks, you can call me Aaron, hell, he'd let you call him daddy if you really wanted to, but he stays silent, only nodding with a kind smile on his lips.
"Do you want me to send Prentiss in now?" You stand, taking the papers he hands towards you over the desk. He deliberates, he knows she's next in line for a review, but his pants are tight and he's gripping the arm of his chair so hard his knuckles are turning white, so he shakes his head, "Not quite yet. I'll get her in a little while, I just need to finish first."
He gestures towards the paperwork he'd been working on when you came in, but he knows damn well he needs to finish, not finish. You nod cheerily at him, bidding him a good day. It's a sentiment that he returns, and he watches with rapt attention as you shut the door to his office and race down the steps, a bounce in your step that makes your chest shake.
He keeps paperwork held conveniently by his side that just so happens to cover the bulge in his pants as he closes the blinds to his office. He's sure Rossi will understand the correlation between you leaving and Aaron shutting himself in, but right now he doesn't care, all he cares about is fucking his fist hard enough to pretend it's your cunt.
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hwangcore · 2 years
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hi love your stray kids scenarios, but can you do a felix x fem reader where reader is like a sub/pillow princess? because i am one lmao and i see a lot of reader!doms which i can’t really get into because im not one lmfao <3
a/n: this is shorter than i had originally intended, but i hope you enjoy!
warnings: smut, oral/fingering (f receiving), kinda dom/sub dynamics, 460 words.
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“Felix?” You couldn’t keep your eyes off him as he slowly pried your legs apart, pressing slow, gentle kisses up your thighs.
“Yes, baby?”
“Are you sure-“
“I told you earlier how much I wanted to eat this pretty pussy of yours,” he said, getting closer and closer to your soaked core. “Now be a good girl and let me enjoy this.”
He wasted no time in licking up your folds before closing his lips around your clit and sucking.
“Shit, F-Felix!”
“Mmm you taste so good, love.” He murmured as he slowly pushed a finger inside you. “Fuck, you’re so wet, baby.” He fell mostly silent as he returned to sucking on your clit, adding a second finger and rubbing hard against that spot inside you that he’d found almost instantly. You tried to close your legs and squirm away from him, but he shoved your thighs back open and pinned them to the mattress..
“Don’t you fucking dare,” he glared. “You know what your safe word is if you want to stop, but unless you use it, you better keep these legs open and let me make you come. Understand?”
“Yes, yes s-sir.” It never failed to amaze you how someone as sweet and soft looking as Felix could be so dominant in bed.
He continued sucking and licking over your clit whilst thrusting his fingers in and out, always making sure to rub against that one sensitive spot, until you could feel yourself nearing the edge.
“F-Felix,” you whined. “Close, so close, please.”
He pulled away from your pussy to grin up at you, looking borderline obscene with your slick all over his mouth. “You don’t have to beg, baby.” He flicked his tongue over your clit. “I’ll let you cum whenever you want, princess.” He ducked back down and wrapped his lips around you, sucking extra hard just as he thrust his fingers back inside you, and that was all you needed.
“Fuck!” You cried out, bucking your hips against his mouth as you came. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. Felix.”
Just before the stimulation turned painful, Felix pulled away from your sensitive cunt, licking his fingers clean.
“Fuck,” you breathed, finally coming down from your high. “That was so good.”
Felix made his way up your body to press a brief but hard kiss to your lips. “I hope you don’t think I’m done with you for the night.”
You leaned back to look up at him, eyes widening when you realized he was dead serious. “You’re going to be the end of me.”
“Don’t worry babe,” he began kissing across your cheek, along your jaw, and down your neck. “All you have to do is be a good girl and take what I give you, yeah?”
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babyboibucky · 3 years
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The Match
Pairing: CEO!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: You come across your boss’ Tinder profile.
Word Count: 1,446
Warnings: HMMMM sexual tension 😏
A/N: I wrote this in a whirl and tried to format it through the app last night and it SUCKS so I’m posting this just now. Anyway, there will definitely be a smutty part two to this lmfao ya know it
Edit: PART 2 IS UP!!!
The Match Masterlist || MAIN MASTERLIST
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Saturday night and you’re on your bed, wine-drunk and all as you mindlessly swiped through Tinder. You start to frown when none of the guys impressed you enough to swipe right. Their bios were all the same, revolving around their egos only to end up with the good ol’ “DTF” line.
Bored and disappointed, you almost exited the app until a very, very familiar face appeared on your screen.
“Holy shitballs, it’s our boss.” You sat up immediately, bringing your phone to your face for a close inspection.
Indeed, it was your boss James Barnes but he was using “Bucky” as his profile name. You wondered whether it was his real account or a poser one. But then you remembered his closest colleagues calling him that.
You snorted as you checked out his profile. He didn’t have a bio but had a couple of photos uploaded. And oh wow, is that a shirtless mirror photo?
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You rarely worked closely with your boss but goddamn, sometimes you wished you did because he was a hot piece of ass.
“Should I swipe right...” you mumbled to yourself.
Would it be unprofessional to do so? But then again, you never really interacted with him that much. Just a couple of polite nods and greetings whenever you passed by him at the office. You weren’t even directly reporting to him.
That being said, you were quite sure that he wouldn’t swipe right on you given that you’re his employee. Of course he wouldn’t want to be the unprofessional one so being tipsy and all, you decided to take one for the team.
“Tss, what the hell.” You huffed out and swiped right.
Not even a second later, the “It’s a match!” message popped up on the screen almost immediately. You choked on your wine and dropped your phone, eyes wide and heart racing because you just matched with your fucking boss.
“Shit!” You hissed, diving onto the floor the pick your phone up.
If the message popped out as soon as you swiped right on him, then that means...
“He swiped right on me first, what the fuck!”
-
Monday came quickly and you’ve never been this restless before. You couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that you matched with your boss on Tinder. Neither of you messaged the other over the weekend but now that you were headed to work, you honestly didn’t know what to expect.
You debated whether to call in sick or maybe, pretend that you died? Pack your bags and perhaps fly to a different country and start anew? You were overacting but matching with your boss on a dating app known for hook-ups should be a valid reason to justify your thoughts.
Maybe James didn’t recognize you that’s why he swiped right. That was possible since you and him didn’t really work together. It’d be better if he swiped right by accident, his phone probably slipped from his hands. He probably doesn’t even know he matched with you, yeah, you decided to settle on that conclusion.
Taking a deep breath in, you fixed your hair before stepping out of your car. Mondays were meant for meetings so he probably wouldn’t be around the office anyway. You rushed over to the elevator and let out a sigh of relief when you didn’t have to share it with anyone.
That was until someone managed to slip a foot in between the doors, catching up to you before the elevators slammed shut.
“Oh.”
Well, well, well if it isn’t James “Bucky” Barnes. Out of all the people you had to share an elevator with, it just had to be him! And judging by how his eyes widened at the sight of you, the Tinder incident wasn’t simply an accident.
“Good morning.” He greeted, clearing his throat as he stood beside you.
James’ scent wafted in the air as soon as the doors slid close and he smelled divine. He smelled like a man, a man man and it almost made your eyes roll. You greeted him back with a soft voice, fighting so hard not to look at him because as always, he looked pretty damn good.
He was restless beside you, adjusting his suit and then his tie. You could see him through your peripheral vision, he kept on fixing his hair as well. Did he get a haircut? It was shorter than before, not that you were paying way too much attention to him.
Meanwhile, you too were fidgeting with your shoulder bag, picking at the leather and praying for this torture to be over before you could even lose control and slam your lips against his.
“How was your weekend?” James asked, glancing at you.
This was probably the longest conversation you had with your boss. You weren’t even sure which was more awkward, striking a conversation after the match or simply remaining quiet for the entire ride up.
“Um, it was good. Yours?” You asked, stammering a little as you stole a quick glance at him.
James nodded, “Good too. Interesting actually.”
Fuck! He knows, he so knows about the match.
You would have preferred complete silence over the elevator music echoing in the air while the both of you were obviously feeling the tension. Was the elevator really this slow?! And when did it get this hot?!
You started fanning yourself when you started to sweat from the awkwardness of it all. Bucky too could obviously feel it, the tension and the elephant in the room waiting to be acknowledged. He loosened his tie all of a sudden, popping the top buttons of his dress shirt which quickly reminded you of the shirtless pic in his profile.
You could feel the heat creep up to your neck and ears. With how bright the lights were in the elevator, it’d be easy for James to notice how red you turned.
“Kinda hot today, don’t you think?” He asked.
You let out a mirthless chuckle, “Yeah, really hot. I think the maintenance should have the air conditioning unit checked.” You breathed out, clearing your throat again as you wiped the sweat forming on your forehead.
For a couple of seconds there was nothing but the collective sounds of you and your boss clearing your throats. The tension was so thick you can literally touch it if you tried. You wanted to address the unspoken issue but how the hell were you going to do that? Jump on his bones? It would seem like a good idea to do so except that he was your boss and that would result to you losing your job.
You wanted to ask James though, whether he was aware that you were his employee when he swiped right. Actually, you just wanted to bring up the topic just to get it over with. Acknowledge the match and then pretend it didn’t happen to save you both from the embarrassment. Yeah, you could do that.
Unable to hold back anymore, you broke the silence to ask James a question.
“Did you swipe right on accident?”
“So are you down to fuck?”
You and James asked at the same time, his straightforward question making you weak in the knees because what the hell...
James bit his lip, shaking his head in response. “I didn’t.”
“Oh.” You blinked, unable to stop yourself from staring at James’ mouth when he ran his tongue over his lower lip before taking it in between his teeth as he looked you over with glazed eyes.
Damn that tongue, though. And damn those blue eyes too.
“Are you...?” He repeated again, reminding you of his question.
Your boss, whom you rarely interacted with in the office, just asked you whether you were down to fuck. Truthfully, you were only on Tinder because of boredom and it wasn’t your goal to actually hook-up with someone. But now that your hot boss swiped right on you and seemed to be really interested in you...
“I...uhh...” you stammered, not really knowing how to tell him that yes, you would very much like to be fucked by him.
The elevator dinged, interrupting the tension between you and James. The doors slid open and James quickly straightened up before walking ahead.
But not without turning around to look at you expectantly, waiting for a response.
Due to the pressure and the elevator doors beginning to close, you blurted out the first thing that you could muster.
“Yes, sir!”
You blushed at your response but it seemed to have stirred something in James because his eyes darkened as he smirked at you.
“Good. Then I’ll see you in my office in fifteen.”
-
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elysianslove · 4 years
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hi! may i request hcs of the haikyuu boys watching/helping their significant other workout? maybe yoga or just a regular workout? would be sweet if it was all of them but i know there are so many, so mainly kuroo, kageyama, bokuto, oikawa and nishinoya <3 thank you!!
hi anon!! i’m sorry i didn’t do all the boys, but i wrote for the specific boys you requested. if you, or anybody else, wants these hc’s for other boys i’d love to do them hehe. hope you enjoy!
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kuroo tetsurō
he’s so excited as soon as you’re like “hey wanna work out together”
like his whole body freezes up and then he just
screams
if you’re already like pretty athletic, he makes everything a competition
but doesn’t actually compete
he just wants to watch you 😏
no fr he’ll be like “i bet i can do more squats than you”
and then just doesnt squat and only watches you squat
this mf 😭
he gets way too excited and puts an alarm at 4;30 am to text you/wake you up to go on a run with him
you: see that’s what we’re not gonna do
if you’re not very athletic or you’re just starting to get accustomed to working out
he is so. encouraging
like sickeningly so
tries his best not to overwhelm you and does really basic workouts with you
but also if ur laying face down on the ground crying “i dont wanna do this anymore” he will NOT have any of it
good luck unsubscribing to his services
he just wants to see you succeed 🥺 👉🏼👈🏼
cooks you the best healthy meals you dont even feel like youre missing out on anything
now
yoga
listen he’s so cheeky
he’s so mf TOUCHY
couples yoga with kuroo >>>>
it’s so funny bc this man is so strong he can do pretty much any move that requires any type of strength but pull out the flexibility card and he will pass away on the spot
he also just likes to watch you do yoga
not just bc he’s a pervert
but also bc it’s just interesting to see you in your zone
buys you yoga pants just bc <3333
“u just wanna stare at my ass”
“how dare you i would never objectify my gf”
stares at your ass <3
kageyama tobio
remember when i said kuroo would make everything a competition but wouldn’t really care
kageyama cares
he’s so annoying youre just trynna have fun working out w ur bf but here he is trynna kill u bc he’s so much better at everything
okay but if YOURE better 🤑
it pisses him off at first but then he realizes he’s pissed off bc ur so hot and make his spine tingle
work outs with him are intense as fuck
like he goes all out
but then he helps you stretch and 😏 it’s worth it
if he’s helping you workout, he’s kinda harsher than he intends to be
and when he realizes that yk maybe he’s being a lil extra
he apologizes and just asks how you wanna do it
spends the night researching hehe 
is encouraging in a demeaning way like “do you WANT to regret not working harder” ur like tobio i swear on my life i will start crying
when y’all are done he does like give u a small kiss and the sweetest smile “good work” and it makes it all the more worth it
about yoga though
when he first watched u he was horny hwbwjwks
he was like oop what is this feeling
but then it clicked lmao
avoids watching you unless you’re doing it privately so he can embarrass himself less
if you invite him to join you it’s just rigorous head shaking but he loves you sm he’ll do anything for you
he just follows your lead and is listening so attentively and is trying to mimic your movements exactly and is so awe oh my god he’s so CUTE
once ur done and ur both just laying on the ground you roll over and kind lean over him and give him a kiss “thank u for doing this with me”
“we should do it more often”
not horny just in love with you <3
bokuto kōtarō
so hyperactive good luck keeping up with him
he’s also like
built
LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN. HIM???? no way he doesnt go crazy w the work outs
if you suggest to work out together he’s so excited and he just does everything normally the way he does at 2.5x speed and you’re just like bruh 🧍🏻‍♀️ slow down
you do eventually find your own rhythm that kinda matches his own
and it’s nice to have him with you because like if you’re at a gym and ur using a device across the room from him he’ll just yell and wave at you and blow you a kiss god i love this dork
after you’re both spent you just sit on the ground across from each other stretching just talking just vibing
gives you a big smooch in between everything if he can
it becomes a really positive addition to your life ngl
if he’s helping you work out
he is actually the fkn BEST
despite him being a work out freak, he doesn’t force that on you in any way
if anything i think he’d be super gentle
so cheerful when encouraging you
and rewards you a lot
too much probably
“20 PUSHUPS BABE !!!! LETS GO MAKE OUT FOR 20 MINUTES”
he doesn’t just say it he really does mean it when he tells you he’s proud of you
loves it when you do yoga
immediately tries to join in
“oouu teach me this move” proceeds to fall on his ass <3
 t’s okay he has a lotta cushioning 😏
he always wants to try the couples yoga moves
he saves them on his phone to show you later and you cant say no bc ur already in gear and the yoga mat is on the ground hehe
(if you watch cody ko and kelsey kreppel’s couples yoga video that’s basically how it goes with you two)
^^^ in one of the moves he has to like lift you up by your arms as youre sitting down and he’s standing and he accidentally just shoves your face into his crotch
you both couldn’t stop laughing until you nearly peed and thats the beauty of love
oikawa tōru
he has to repeatedly ask you if you’re s u r e you wanna work out with him 
if you’re s u r e you can keep up
please hand his cocky ass to him <3 
if you’re athletic, prepare to have him try to one up you every time you do something 
it’s so sweet though cause he’s so determined and he’s sticking his tongue out between his lips and you’re just like baby please what is this 
tells you to lay beneath him while he does push ups so he can kiss you 
you complain about how sweaty he is but really you just want him to take his shirt off <3 
okay two important things i want to go over
one. oikawa does not know when to stop. so, honestly, you probably suggested to work out with him to keep him in check and make sure he doesn’t overwork himself 
please make him drink water and take breaks when necessary :( 
two. his knee :( he would probably need to be very careful and he’ll teach you the correct way to massage it and prep it before he does any critical work 
if you approach him one day about helping you work out cause you’re clueless — yes it will get to his head
but like ??? he’s your boyfriend??? your very athletic boyfriend??? 
who else would u ask tf 😹
anyways he makes a whole like list and shit
organizes it so well with color coding and different handwriting 
keeps you up to date with your progress and always says things like “look how well you’re doing babe!” and gives you a hugeeee hug 
now, oikawa is either weirdly flexible, or not flexible at all
we’re gonna go for the first one for this yoga hc 
joins you randomly and starts doing the poses correctly right away ur like ??? sir ??? 
distracts you. so much. 
“can i have a kiss— another one?— one more— one more babe— okay an—“ 
make out sessions ensued :)
nishinoya yū
actually i think noya would like to be in own zone kinda thing when he’s working out
probably blasting some katy perry in his ears ngl 
but when you tell him you wanna go work out with him?? 
now you’re both blasting katy perry in your ears 
stares. stares so much. provocatively. 
he’s your bf so you get it
but women have come up to you in the gym asking if you’re okay hbwjwkwe
makes you try out his routine while he tries out yours 
“wow babe this is sooo easy” he’s dying dont believe him
you guys probably have a handshake that’s so motivating to do before and after eeekkkk he probably makes you feel SO good about yourself after
takes you to eat the unhealthiest shit he can find after a workout because why not right ? chivalry? undead 😻
if you ask him for help he’ll accept right away
competes with you to help you improve 
“one day babe you’ll be beating me at these with such ease” 
he’s the loud kind of encouraging 
yells a lot
like so much 
body worship all the time <3333
“god u look SO good right now i love you so much” 
this simp i love him sm
anyways. onto yoga 
did i mention he stares 👁👁
because he does 
he already knows you do yoga and he will find out your schedule 
just. likes to watch you tbh 
if you offer to do couples yoga with him he refuses bc he likes the view where he is lmfao 
there are so many tiktoks of him just doing the dances while you calmly do yoga 
it becomes a trend lmfaowjwnsj
anyways yes best supportive bf award goes to noya (actually all of them who am i kidding)
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end note; MY BEST FRIEND PAINTED AKAASHI FOR MY BDAY GIFT I STOPPED BREATHING ,,, anyways i hope y’all enjoyed this!! feel free to request some more mwah
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spideyskrunkly · 3 years
Text
GPD Chat
Just something for fun
🧸 - Grace
🐍 - Nathan
🎧 - Alex
👮‍♂️ - Ramirez
🍭 - Jones
⭐ - Chief
Warnings: swearing, rude humor, crappy art also no reader here sorry
Everyone's just being mean to eachother
I was kinda inspired by a Wattpad fic
2:24 p.m.
🍭, 👮‍♂️, 🎧, 🐍 and 🧸 have joined the chat
🎧: Everyone in here?
🐍: Present
🧸: Hey
👮‍♂️: Here
🍭: wtf Ramirez where have you been aren't you supposed to be at work????
👮‍♂️: Chief King gave me the day off so I went to the beach
🐍: What's the weather like over there
👮‍♂️: A little chilly but pretty sunny
🧸: I heard they had some animals around
🎧: Like sharks 😨
🧸: No more like just crabs and types that can be seafood
👮‍♂️: I actually got a picture of the crab!
👮‍♂️: I took what's called a selfie
🍭: How is that news
🎧: Shut up Jones
🍭: 😢
🎧: #jonesslander20××
🍭: Wth
🎧: Chile anyways so Ramirez can we see the photo
👮‍♂️: Sure
🐍: What kind of crab is it
👮‍♂️: idk but it's green
🐍: Oh no, stay away I heard they were weird
👮‍♂️: Don't worry Nathan I only took a photo
👮‍♂️:
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👮‍♂️: Like I said, a selfie
🎧: THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO A SELFIE 💀💀
🍭: BRO 💀
🧸: 😂 wtf the angle
👮‍♂️: I'm trying my best here 😭😭
🐍: Y'all c'mon he's old give him a break now he didn't know
🍭: This is that horror movie type shit 💀
🧸: LMAO
🎧: Naw this is one of those anime angles
🧸: ALEX DUDE
🍭: LMFAO ALEX
🐍: I'm ashamed of you all
👮‍♂️: It's okay Nathan this happens all the time
🐍: U should stick up for yourself man
🐍: This is why Jones is rude
🍭: 🙄💅 Bitch, I can be rude to whoever stands against me and that is that
🎧: I don't see crumbs off of his statement
🐍: That's it
🐍 adds ⭐ in the chat
🍭: WTF NATHAN
🧸: Nathan bro
🧸: You can't just do that
🎧 : We're so dead
👮‍♂️: Yikes
🐍: WTF RAMIREZ I WAS DEFENDING YOU 😡😡
👮‍♂️: Calling the chief in here is suicide
🐍: Relax he might be busy
⭐ joins the chat
🍭: bro 😑
🐍: oh shit
⭐: What is this
⭐: Why aren't you all working
👮‍♂️: Damnit Nathan
🎧: Misunderstood the assignment
🧸: Hey Chief
⭐: Hello Grace
⭐: What's up Nathan
🐍: Ramirez is getting bullied but now I'm getting bullied
🎧: fatherless behavior
🍭: Whoa Alex 💀
🧸: Oh damn ok Alex
👮‍♂️: Sheesh Alex 😨
🐍: See
⭐: Quit bullying each other and get to work
🍭: I am now 🧚‍♂️ a non bully 🧚‍♂️
⭐: Shut up Jones
🍭: Now I'm getting bullied after I stopped
🍭: Harassment!!
🎧: #jonesslander20××
🧸: Alex you need to calm down
🍭: YEAH ALEX CALM DOWN
🧸: No Jones I still think you need to shut up
🍭: Grace 😭
🐍: This is getting out of hand
⭐: Well CUT IT OUT
⭐: Get back to work that's an order
⭐: Now how do you turn this off
👮‍♂️: There's a red button that says off sir
⭐: Thank you Ramirez
⭐: Now hang on
⭐: [muted]
🧸: sir??
🐍: I think he disconnected
🎧: No his chatbar is muted, I checked the recent active bar
🍭: HOW???
🍭: Ramirez what did you tell him???
👮‍♂️: I didn't tell him anything I just told him about the red button on the right corner to turn off
🎧: THAT'S THE FUCKING MUTE CHAT BUTTON DUMBASS
👮‍♂️: Why would they even have that button
🎧: I think he was co host or something so maybe he had the option to shut anyone up
🐍: Ramirez you basically told him to shut up
🍭: Down bad
🧸: srs 💀
👮‍♂️: Aw come on guys
⭐: ...
🍭: Wait his icons still glowing
👮‍♂️: Wait so then how can he get out??
🎧: Click options and then click exit
👮‍♂️: Oh ok
⭐:
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🍭: OMG I WAS LEAST EXPECTING THAT 💀💀
🧸: See we need to work on angles 😂
🐍: NO BECAUSE WTF
👮‍♂️: 😂😂😂😂
🎧: LMAO BOOMER SHIT 👹
🍭: ALEX CHILL
⭐: GOT IT
⭐: I CAN SEE THE CHAT
⭐: RAMIREZ
👮‍♂️: I'm so sorry sir I thought that was the mute button
⭐: PULL THAT SHIT AGAIN AND YOU ALL ARE GOING TO BE ON FILING DUTY
🍭: Why all of us tf
🧸: Exactly wtf for
⭐: QUIT QUESTIONING ME
⭐: NOW GET TO WORK
⭐: Jones I have an assignment for you so come to my office
🍭: Damnit
🎧: lmao see you in hell
🍭: 🖕
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Text
This is my first post so I’m sorry if it’s bad lmao but yeaaa, this is kinda my first smut post ya knowww- but yea if it’s bad I’m sorry. Also I’m only doing this cause I’m bored asfffff 😫😫 also I might only post smut cause that’s what I’m best at cause I’m one hörny bish lmfao. So yea no one under 18 read I guess.
SMUT UNDER THIS PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
Karl Heisenberg x female reader smut 18+
“Only for a bit”
Warning: cursing , kinkyyy, getting tied up, choking, pet calling (sweetheart, kitten) you also using names like sir. Just sexy stuff 😩
Enjoy <3
You were one of the 4 daughters of Lady Dimitrescu. You, Bela, Daniela, and Cassandra were treated very well, with rich delicious wine and goods. You were different from them though. All 4 of them were vampires, but you, you are an ordinary human being. Instead of eating human meat and drinking human blood, you ate normal animal meat and drank fine wine or water. It wasn’t difficult living with this family, you actually really enjoyed it. You had a wonderful mother and wonderful sisters. You felt loved and accepted in their family. You have lived with the Dimitrescu’s since a very younge age. You were brought into the family by Mother Miranda, who apparently found you in the abounded village a few miles away.
Today there was also a very important meeting being held up, and mother insisted you came over to accompany her, which you happily accepted. You were now In your bedroom, getting ready, but stopped when you heard a knock. “Sister, mother told me to bring you this dress she got made especially for you” you heard Bella say behind the door. “Oh ok, thank you very much and tell mother I’m very grateful” you said opening the door and taking the box with the dress in it. “I will, also mother wants you ready in 20 minutes” Bella said disappearing into a swarm of flies. “Ok!” You said loudly but not too loud.
You opened the box to see a gorgeous emerald green dress, with a bunch of gold swirls on the front with green gems. You slowly and carefully put the dress on and then go style your hair. You weren’t really used to these long dresses, and looking very elegant. After 20 minutes, you walked down the stairs in your heels, slowly to not fall over and make a scene of yourself. “You look absolutely stunning, as always dear” you heard your mother call out to you. “Thank you mother, and I’m very grateful for this dress. Bella told me it was specifically made for me” you tell your mother with a soft smile. “Only the best for my sweet beautiful daughter’s” your mother replied back with a soft smile. “So are you ready dear?” Your mother asked turning to look at you. “Yes mother” you said, taking your coat off the hanger and same with mother.
It was early autumn, and it was getting a tiny bit chilly. You walked down the paths, walking past many trees turning all different colours to show it was autumn. It truly was a gorgeous sight to see. After a few minutes of walking, you get to your destination. Mother opens the front door to find Donna sitting peacefully, greeting you and mother, while her doll running around laughing maniacally. Moreau was quietly lighting the candles to bring a bit of light inside. And Heisenberg no where to be seen yet. After all you were 30 minutes early. Mother sat down in her regular spot, talking to Donna about how she has been and catching up. You, you went to talk to Moreau about how well he has been. After 10 minutes of sitting down and talking to Moreau about video games he has, the door was harshly opened by a heavy boot, belonging to no other than Heisenberg. Everyone brings their attention towards the man himself, looking at his toothy white smile, greeting everyone by tilting his hat a bit and walking towards his seat. “So the dog decided to come over” mother started. “Oh shut up you bitch, I always come here for meetings, usually a bit late, but today is different!” Heisenberg said glaring at her through his glasses, and then looking at you, you looking back at him with an angry expression. “What are you frowning at kitten?” He asked you. “I do not like it when someone calls my mother in appropriate names” you said with a harsh and calm tone. “But your “dear mother” has called me a dog so I have full right to call her a bitch” he said putting his hands over he chair, and crossing his legs. “Not like she isn’t right” you mumbled, loud enough for everyone to hear you, and your mother laughing quietly.
“You wanna fight or something kitten?” He asked you leaning forward now. “No, I just don’t like my mother being called harsh words that aren’t true” you said glaring at him. But when he was about to argue, Mother Miranda has arrived, leaving Heisenberg to close his mouth and groan loud enough for you to look at him.
After about an hour or so, the meeting ended. “Y/n, dear, please do me a favour and walk home. I must talk to Mother Miranda about something very important, and I won’t be coming home any time soon” mother said. You give her a reassuring smile and a nod, putting on your coat. You weren’t scared of walking home, because you knew how to fight. You could kill and fight with no problem, after all you do live with vampires. You walked out the door, and first thing you smell is the strong smell of cigar and whiskey, telling you Heisenberg was right there, and you were right. You turned your head towards him watching him smoking his cigar with a “really, here?” look. You shake your head a bit and start walking home, but before you could go you heard him talk. “I didn’t let you go anywhere kitten did I?” He asked you, you turning around to look at him. You took a deep breath and said “no.1 I ain’t no kitten so stop with that kitten shit, and 2nd of all you ain’t my parent so I can do what I want” you said with a little smile and started walking off home.
But Heisenberg didn’t give up easily. He started following you. You turn around rapidly. “What do you want?” You asked. Heisenberg just watched you. You could feel him eye you up and down even with those glasses on. You sighed out loud and started walking again, not caring that he was right behind you anymore. “You know what kitten, come with me to my factory, I wanna show u something” he said suddenly. You turned around once again and looked at him. “Why would I go to your factory?” He sighed “Come on pet, do ya have anything betta to do? No, so come over to mine. At least I’ll have some company”. The thought of you and Heisenberg being together alone made you kind of excited. You liked this man for a bit and loved teasing and annoying him, and he loved doing the same thing.
“Fine, but only for a bit” you said, letting him go in front and lead the way. It was a small walk and you got there real quick. “So here we are, my dear factory” he said showing off his mechanical creation’s. After giving you a walk through the factory, you asked why he invited you over. “Well I had a few questions” he answered, and now ur curiosity wanted to know what he had to ask. “You look curious kitten, would ya like to know?” He asked which you responded with a nod. “Well kitten, why did you chose to listen to me and come over?” Was his question first. “I dunno, I was bored so yea” you responded. “2nd question, what’s your type?” You looked at him with a suspicious look. “Why do you want to know that?” You asked. “You really wanna know kitten?” He asked lowering his voice a bit, which makes you shiver in pleasure. “I would like to know, but is it worth it?” You asked. “Well you will have to wait and see” he said. “Come over here” he said taking his glasses off and hat, and you obeying him and come near him. You could see the lust and need in his eyes making you feel warm and tingly.
“I would like to know why you want to know my type, Heisenberg” you said getting closer to him. “You really wanna know dear?” Seeing the lust in his eyes. “Yes I do” you said, a teasing look on your face. “Cause I wanna see if I’m of any of your standards dear. I wanna see if I can claim you as mine” he said coming closer to your ear, whispering in a deep raspy voice, which made you feel wetness come over. “And what would you do to me if you were of my standards and could claim me as yours?” You asked, teasingly wanting to know his answer. “Oh I’d do a lot to you kitten~” he purred into your ear. “Could you tell me what exactly?” You asked. “Right now, I’d like to rail you right here right now, make you scream my name until you can’t speak no more, listen to your moans like some music, fuck you so hard you start shaking, tie you up and make sure you can’t fuckin escape and make you endure the pleasure” he said making him squirm under him, making you feel like a hot mess, with only words. “Can I touch you?” He asked. You nod, immediately, begging for some friction. He slowly put his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to him, and then taking your chin in one of his hands, and giving you a fast kiss, which soon turned into a heated make out session, his hands travelling around your body, while yours on his shoulders. Picking you up, he places you on the table behind him, throwing everything on the table onto the ground, placing you on top of it not stopping the kiss.
He soon started taking your dress off, unzipping it from the back, slowly to not make no damage. The kiss getting hotter and more heated, tasting the mix between cigar and whiskey, making your knees weak. After taking off the dress, he starts trailing kisses and bites down your jaw and kneck down to your exposed chest. He looked at you with a questionable look, and you gave him a quick nod to show him it was ok. After pleasuring you with your tits, and not getting a lot of moans out of you, it didn’t satisfy Heisenberg.
He laid you down onto your back and took of your panties. He gave you another look, and you nod. He slowly looks at you panties. “I haven’t even touched you that much, but look how fuckin wet you are kitten! And because of me and only for me” he said spreading your lips. He lowered himself biting at your thighs earning a few needy moans. It took him ages to finally give you a bit of pleasure by spreading your lips, and him finally using his mouth and tounge finally licking your clit, making your back arch and moan his name. That made Heisenberg go faster and add more pressure, which made you a moaning hot mess, for him and only him. “You taste fuckin delicious kitten” he said in pants. He then brought his 2 fingers, and slipped them inside you, curling them, making you feel more pleasure. When you felt your orgasm coming, Heisenberg stop what he was doing making you whine . “Come on, Heisenberg, I wanna cum so badly, please lemme cum” you moaned. “But kitten, I’m not done with you yet.” He said taking his shirt off, boots and then undoing his belt.
When he undid his belt, and unzipped his pants, you could see his hard erection, making you wetter. “Enjoying the view princess?” He asked while taking his dick out. You just gave him a needy look and that gave him the hint to put it in. But before that you saw metal scraps flying past him taking your hands and pinning them at the top of your head on the table, making you unable to move your hands. This distracted you, so you didn’t notice Karl moving forward getting in place to rail you. He pushed in, which made you wince in pain letting him enter you bit by bit. You didn’t notice how big he was, feeling him fill you to the brim. “Is that all you can take kitten? Well fuck you still have a bit to go. You are so tight for me baby” he said moaning breathily.
“I cant take anymore Heisenberg, it’s too much” you moaned your legs trembling. “I’ll make you take all of it” he said pushing the rest of his length deep inside, making you arch your back in pleasure, making you gasp hard. He let you adjust to his size for a few minutes until he started moving his hips. At first he went with a slow passionate pace, but seeing you arch your back moaning for more, he picked up speed and strength, taking his dick nearly out, and slamming back in, making you gasp and moan. “Kitten, I want to hear you loud, don’t hide any of your sweet noises” he said breathlessly. You gave him a light nod before him slamming himself into you again, making you nearly scream his name out, him hitting every perfect spot.
He took one of your legs, onto his shoulder, making him go deeper into you, making you a moaning mess. He then took his glove off, by teeth and started rubbing your clit, building another orgasm inside you. “Already another orgasm pet? You have to beg for this one a lot harder sweetheart” he said rubbing your clit harder and slamming harder into you. “P-please sir please let me c-cum, I’ll do anything, please let me cum, please” you begged in between moans. “Tell me how good I make you feel” Heisenberg same slamming into you faster, watching your face curl into pleasure. “You make me feel so good sir, please haah your dick makes me feel so good sir, you are so good sir” you said with tears in the corner of your eyes.
“Good girl, so fuckin good for me and only me” slamming hard into you, your legs trembling nearing your orgasm. “Karl I’m about to-“ you slightly screamed, but Heisenberg stopped you by wrapping his hand around your neck, his other hand still rubbing your clit, making you cum hard on his dick, squeezing him, making him go harder, chasing his own orgasm moaning fuck and your so fuckin tight. And then he slammed one more time, spilling his seed deep inside you, filling you up. After that intense orgasm, Karl fell on top of you trying to support his weight with his hands on each side of your head. He let you go off the metal scraps, and you put one hand in his hair and the other on his shoulder. “Fuck, I should’ve done this sooner, don’t ya think?” He asked slightly laughing. “You should have, but better now than never” you said and with that he lowered down to give you a soft passionate kiss, making you melt right under him.
“You should go home kitten.. you can maybe stay a bit longer next time” he mumbled softly, not wanting to let you go, but also not wanting you to get in trouble and hurt. “I should” you said getting up, cleaning up and dressing up. He just put on his trousers and belt and watched you while lighting a cigar in his mouth. You were about to head out until Karl took your wrist and kissed you a goodbye kiss. “I’ll see you again kitten” he said with a grin letting you go and opening the door for you. “Next time then. Bye bye” you said and he just waved. What a crazy day you told yourself walking home aching but happy.
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themistakengenius · 3 years
Text
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-> The "about me" section is inspired by the one and only @cosmiksims 1.) Do you prefer to be referred by your name or blog name? I don't share my real name online but I answer to both MistakenGenius and Blue,(Why blue? Honestly just because it's my fav colour hehe) 2.) Where are you from? I'm from Romania 3.) Do you have pets? 👀 I in fact do, I have 3 cats and a dog, sadly I don't have any pictures of them on my computer so I can't show you them but trust me, they are adorable <33 They're like my children haha 4.) Tell us about your “dream.” Honestly I just want a stable job that I love (I do not want to wake up complaining about going to work, I want to enjoy it!. Be able to financially support myself on my own without depending on other people or a s/o. I want to have kids in the future and I hope my future includes a loyal s/o <3 5.) Aside from art, what are your hobbies? I used to skateboard before Covid, I would go to a skate park and basically just do crazy shit lmfao. I also edit photos and take photos irl and in sims, it's sort of like a passion of mine. I love capturing the moments :P
6.) Does anyone irl know about your blog? Nope
7.) Do you know anyone from your blog irl? Nope
8.) What are some fun facts about you? I've been playing sims for almost 3 years now. I never broke any bones in my body. I used to have a tumblr gameplay but got bored of it lmfao
9.) What’s your day job? I work as a waitress, and I love my job 10.) What’s your aesthetic? I don't think I have any tbh, I just kinda go with whatever vibe I feel like at the time
11.) What kind of artist are you? I draw by hand on paper. I tried digital art a few times and I liked it but I prefer drawing by hand.
12.) How did you get into your form of art? I still haven't gotten into my form of art but it shall happen soon.
13.) What do you watch/listen/read/anything else while you create? I don't like watching anything while I draw because I get distracted easily but I do listen to spotify while I draw
14.) What is your favorite of your own creations so far? Probably this one: I just finished it today. It's Hinata Hyūga from Naruto (I'm such a big fan of Naruto, if you couldn't tell already lmfao)
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15.) How would you describe your art style? So far I'd say anime looking/cartoonish
16.) What is more satisfying to you coloring or outlining? Outlining, because you finally get to see your creation coming together. Something about outlining just gives it more depth and I'm so here for it.
17.) What meme would you use to describe yourself?
I have two, because I'm indecisive as fuck >:) (Also replace sir with miss ^-^)
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18.) If you were on the run, what would you change your name to? GeniusMistaken ;) I'm kidding, I don't actually know. Probably a very common name so they would take forever to find me. With no face ID, no DNA, no fingerprint ID and just a name you're kinda stuck so. For legal reasons you did not hear that from me wriowjrgjr lmfao
19.) Have you ever or do you want to change blog names? I have in fact changed my blogs name. If you look back at some of my older poses I used to be called "BlueSkies" but I changed to MistakenGenius because I thought it was more fitting with the theme I wanted to go for so yeah
20.) God forbid Tumblr decides to pull a MySpace and lets us have page songs, what song would you choose? I have so many songs in my mind right now and I'm so indecisive I can never pick just one *sobs*. I would probably go for the song "Chicken Tendencies" Please do not feel pressured to do this but imo it was v fun >:D Now for the tags... @peefarts69 @cherryael
@geeky-simz @asplashofsims @rainypurpleskies @orchidlyhere @amelettes @simlishslurs @kubysim @asimofmanyhats @whitemoonshine98 @insimnious @sunniesimmer
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jean----ralphio · 4 years
Text
BoB liveblog ep 7
Episode 7: The Breaking Point. YEAH, OF MY FUCKING HEART
I HATE THIS EPISODE. I HATE IT WITH THE FIERY INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND BURNING SUNS.
00:00 I really don’t wanna do this you guys.
00:38 Can’t we just pretend this episode doesn’t exist?
01:22 OMFG I CAN’T ALL THE SWEET IRL MEN ARE CRYING NOOOO IT HURRRTS
04:05 RICH! Ok I feel a little better. Ahaha, he’s growing a beard. It’s got nothing on the quarantine beard he’s rocking nowadays tho
04:22 That whole scene is hilarious but I’m too distracted by Rich to appreciate it properly
05:18 Horsie
05:30 Hey Fassy
05:57 He’s so obsessed with the Luger, oh Hoob ☹
06:07 Ahhh that second where he looks into the camera and fires ☹ He’s so happy
06:31 IT’S SHIFTY MY ANGEL SON, MY ANGEL CHILD, LOOK AT HIIIIIMMMM!!!! MY BABY! I’M SO HAPPY! THIS IS THE ONLY GOOD PART OF THE EPISODE! HE’S SO HUMBLE AND PERF ILY SHIFTY
06:51 He is such a fucking angel, I swear. “What happened to the horse?” PETA would be pleased you care, baby.
07:01 Look at my son, look at his little angel face
07:27 Buck seems a little better??
07:47 Gold.
“Shut up boys.”
“Shutting up, Sarge.”
But notice my angel is perfectly well-behaved
08:00 “That was no rifle.” Shifty just Knows Things.
“What do you see, Shift?”
“Nobody out there.” HE’S JUST A BOSS SNIPER ANGEL ELF BABY OK
08:15 Oh Hoob
08:43 Oh God
09:03 ROE OMG NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR JOKES “Did you think it was a German leg, Hoob?” I MEAN LMAO BUT NO
09:33 Nooooooooooo
09:44 Oh God, the way Buck and Perco are cradling his face ☹
10:04 Husbands, do something, reincarnate him or something
10:32 Oh Dick is shivering aw
10:38 Lip, baby, no, do not cover for than incompetent POS
10:48 The husbands are unimpressed
11:39 Nice gloves tho Dike
11:57 “At present, as per usual, but I’ll clarify that with you at a later time.” No. No. He’s asking now. He needs to know now. Wtf.
12:39 IS THAT RICH??
13:12 RICH! BEARDED RICH!
13:23 I LOVE HIM SO MUCH YOU GUYS
13:26 Just gonna pause here a little while, excuse me
13:47 Lip is such a boss. We love you Lip
14:13 Bill’s laugh <3 RICH’S SMILE <333
14:48 Dick omg your flirting, so cute. They are in love.
15:20 Fassy is judging you… that means Alicia Vikander is coming for you…
15:50 Omg Nix knows his husband so well
16:24 Aw, Bill and Babe <3 BROTP
17:33 Bill, sweetie, no, I’m sorry but Buck is not fine!
17:58 Oh God the foreboding. Rich ☹ <3
18:01 WTF is Luz smoking LMAO
18:33 RIIIIICH
19:08 “Well, they had a point. You’re an idiot.” Oh Penk. I’ll miss you Penk.
19:31 UGH GTFO. To be fair the actor does a great job with this role.
20:01 Dike is so random. But it’s nice he’s taking an interest??
21:20 NIX LMAO
21:33 Ugh, Dick. Stop. I know it’s to establish a sense of normalcy and ritual but Come. On. Buddy. Lol I love how Nix is just like LMAO NO I’M NOT GOING. I wish I could just say no when asked to do things by my bosses. We know it’s cos Nix can’t bear to be apart from his husband for so long <3
22:33 Guys, don’t be mean. Fassy, no, come on.
22:53 Wtf are Penk and Rich doing…
23:05 LMAO @ Dick and Sink.
“Got to keep the morale up for the folks back home.”
“Why?”
“Damned if I know.”
Iconic. Valid.
23:34 Lol my Joe/Charlie thought he was gonna get in trouble, but Dad just wanted to nag <3
24:24 Oh Bill <3 “Tied me own boots once last week, all by meself.” <3333 Bill please never change.
24:30 Rich <3333
24:36 Riiiiichhhhhh <3
24:48 Johhny ‘unimpressed’ Martin is already looking unimpressed, new kid, watch out, you’re not off to a great start.
24:56 Rich’s helmet still has bullet holes from the last episode, love the continuity <3
25:07 “You’ll find out, son.” Oh, Alley <3
25:17 Rich is hilarious in this scene, he’s having so much fun <3
25:22 Hey Lieb, I’ve missed you
25:46 Riichhh <3
25:53 OMFG that exchange!
               “How are those nuts, sarge?”
               “Doin fine, Bill, nice of you to ask.”
               Wtf Lip!!
26:05 Bye, Fassy!
26:26 Even when he’s blurred by snow, Speirs is intimidatingly good-looking.
27:01 He’s so polite but so scary
27:23 You’re hot, Speirs, so I automatically trust you. Not sure what that says about me but it’s probably not good tbh
27:57 Joe/Charlie has been back five seconds and he’s already out for blood.
28:58 Hey Lee
30:00 Oh God
31:33 Oh no, Joe/Charlie, my baby ☹
33:39 Bill’s here, baby, it’s OK
34:10 I can’t deal with the hilarity of Babe blocked in by the tree while Joe/Charlie is in such a bad way and being done so dirty
34:56 Oh GOD
35:28 Bill </3
36:11 My thoughts exactly, Luz
36:42 Buck ☹
37:41 “Hey Joe, I told you I’d beat you back to the states.” Bill don’t me laugh while I’m crying. Aw, we’ll miss you <3
37:59 Not really the time but fuck it, I am totally digging Luz’s hair now
38:26 I’m so shook. I’ve watched this series a billion times but it still hurts me. Scene after scene, Joe/Charlie in pain, Buck screaming for a medic, God Neal and Kirk are so good.
39:18 Oh God, Buck
40:00 Rich I love you
40:44 Rich <3 ☹
41:22 Noooooooo </3
41:44 No. No. NO.
41:59 NO. NOPE. CANON NOT ACCEPTED. They’re fine. They’re fine, they’re just off-screen for the rest of the series, chillin with Hoob and Renee on like a nice beach somewhere. Drinking maitais and maragaritas and building sandcastles and shit.
44:00 Hit Malarkey the hardest? NO FUCKING WAY, LIP, HIT ME THE HARDEST, MORE LIKE! But in all seriousness, can you imagine losing your friends, not having a body to bury or time to grieve ugh ☹ </3 OK I concede that Malarkey and I can share the grief 50/50. No wait. 60/40. In favour of me.
45:15 Malark, it’s what Hoob would have wanted. I’d ask him but he’s busy sunbathing and keeping the drinks topped up
46:57 We love you Buck
47:14 Bull <3
47:43 Lieb <333
48:10 Hang on, sweetie, Dad isn’t back yet
48:50 It’s OK, Lip, sweetie, you can do it.
49:38 Lip, listen to me, your Dad’s going to fix everything in about ten, fifteen minutes. And he’ll get you a hot boyfriend in the process. It’s all going to be OK.
50:05 Dick, honey, Dike doesn’t understand a thing you’re saying
50:25 Dike’s like lol who the fuck was that guy?
51:17 Lieb is so blood-thirsty <3
51:23 DON’T STOP RUNNING, IDIOT. NEVER STOP RUNNING! THE REST OF US LEARNT THAT IN THE FIRST EPISODE! GOD!
51:40 WTF ARE YOU DOING, YOU FUCKING WASTE OF OXYGEN
52:09 Poor Lee
52:22 NO, FUCK, OMG
53:14 Don’t send my Lee alone!
53:33 Bull. A cigar. Right now? I like Johnny’s beard, suits him.
54:13 “THEY SHOT ME IN MY ASS, BOYS!” Aw Perco. Iconic.
54:36 Legit one of my fave scenes in the history of television. Dick is just so beside himself and desperate and helpless watching his sons stuck and in so much trouble. He’s in full Dad mode, about to run in there to save his boys. Then, and this is so subtle but it’s my fave bit, HE CUTS OFF SINK. HE IGNORES/SPEAKS OVER SINK. DICK! SPEAKS! OVER! SINK! IN WHAT UNIVERSE WOULD HE EVER DO THAT?! ON WHAT PLANET WOULD HE EVER BE SO DISRESPCTFUL?! THIS ONE, COS HIS SONS NEED HIM NOW AND BEING POLITE AND ADHERRING TO PRINCIPLE AND RANK DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER WHEN EASY IS IN TROUBLE! AND THEN HE CALLS UP OUR BOY SPEIRS. AND SPEIRS IS SO FUCKING GUNG-HO, BOUNCING ABOUT READY TO SLAUGHTER EVERYONE, SO FUCKIN EXCITED!!
And then there’s Nix, lmao, chillin with his binoculars, super relaxed as long as his husband stays safe, tbh.
55:06 Oh that was the new boy, aw
55:12 BOSS BAMF ICONIC WE STAN
55:20 Here you go, Lip, one BF courtesy of your Dad lol
55:48 Oh GOD I MISS RICH
56:24 LMFAO was that the haystack Dike was behind??
57:00 I.C.O.N.I.C.
57:23 “The astounding thing was, that after he hooked up with I company, he came back.” Annnnnd Lip’s in love.
57:49 Aw happy boys
58:09 Noooooo they’ve been through enough! I’VE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH THIS EPISODE OK, FUCK!
58:23 Go on, my angel son, you can do it.
58:36 Go, son. I love you.
58:43 Yes. Good boy.
59:26 Aw Bull piggybacking Perco <3
1:00:23 Oh yay! The church scene!
1:00:39 Look at my angel son <3
1:00:48 Hey Lieb
1:00:54 IT’S TAB! HEY TAB!
1:01:09 Babe <3 GRANT <3
1:01:29 Ahahaha Roe, I see you strategically placed yourself where you could stare at Babe 😉
1:01:59 Only 63 men left? Oh </3
1:02:00 Ahh Joe/Charlie <3 Bill <3 We love and miss you
1:02:20 RICH <333333 I LOVE YOU RICH <3333333 GOODBYE RICH <333333333333
1:02:39 Fuck Speirs is hot
1:02:53 The flirting <3 shooting looks at each other aw
1:03:09 Boys, stop checking each other out. You’re literally in a church full of nuns, go somewhere else to expend your sexual tension, jeez.
1:03:41 Flirting via talk of Roman soldiers, I dig it
1:04:28 Oh God, guys, this bit. Other than the propensity of my angel son, compared to usual, this is the only good part of the episode, I am here for the Speirton!
               “You don’t have any idea who I’m talking about, do you?” HIS FACE IS SO SOFT
               “No, Sir.” Lip, sweetie.
               “Hell, it was you, first sergeant.”
Speirs’ is in love right back. And his continued flirting re battlefield commission GOD. The way he looks at Lip… you deserve the hottest guy in the whole show, Lip, proud of you sweetie.
1:06:48 Annnnnd everything fucking hurts.
 To summarise, I am kinda appeased by the glorious glory that is Spierton. Rich and Penk and Hoob and Renee are FINE. THEY JUST SO HAPPEN TO BE OFF-SCREEN. IT’S FINE. I’M FINE ABOUT IT.
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Joker X Teenage!Killer!Reader
Summary: You aren't a vigilante. You're just a nice teenage girl who's got supernatural powers from her necklace and who tries to survive and protect herself from the awful, disrespectful men of Gotham City by annihilating them from existence. Your inspiration was the man who started riots all over Gotham and also whom you mildly admired; the Joker. Who would have thought that he'd be slightly interested in you, though?
A/N:  Let's be honest, even if this movie doesn’t take place in the DCCU, this is still a DC character. Would it hurt if we add a few superpowers in this fanfic? I don't really think so. Also, I deadass didn’t know how to end this fanfic so I’m sorry if the ending is kinda trashy lmfao. Anyways, feel free to send me any requests y'all might have!
Warnings: Body mutilation, catcalling and public sexual harassment.
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★・・・★・・・★・・・★・・・★
“And as we can see behind me, a third riot has gone loose on Wall Street this month. As for now, more people are participating than on the last two, yet there are no signs of their, so-called leader, the Joker who apparently escaped from Arkham Asylum about two weeks ago-” You turned the TV off. You didn't want it to be noticeable that you supported that type of stuff and raise suspicion from your coworkers, much less your boss. “(I don't give a fuck about what people might think of him. He's a fucking hero to me. He showed all those rich assholes what happens when you turn your back on the people that need help the most, leave them to die or just straight-up treat them like insignificant shit.)” You thought to yourself smiling while you finished mopping the floor of the restaurant you worked at. It was your closing shift today and as soon as your last chair was up the table of the restaurant and your boss left, you grabbed the front door keys, grabbed all your stuff and closed the restaurant's back and front door, you head straight to the subway.
It was a pretty chilly night, as usual. Once the subway arrived, you hopped in, put all your hair on each side of your front and put the big fluffy hoodie of your short black coat on. Although you and a strange man with a long purple coat and a black hat that covered almost his entire face were all alone in that big wagon, you didn't want to bring any attention from the next possible passengers. Unfortunately for you, that’s not what your luck had in store for you tonight. After arriving at the next station, two white, apparently wealthy and drunk men, got on the same wagon as you. You gave them a look. They looked like they got out of some kind of crazy party or club. You rolled your eyes and looked the other way, but apparently, one of them noticed your annoyance towards them and approached you.
“Hey, there! *hic* How you doin', hot-stuff? You’re lookin' *hic* real nice,” one of the sits right in front of you. God, not even the significant distance between the two of you could stop his disgusting alcohol smelling breath from going up your nostrils. “I’m sure you'd look *hic* even better in my bed all bent over. How much for one *hic* whole night, mama, huh?”
“(Ugh, men. Great.)” you think to yourself sarcastically before your eyes extend a little bit and an evil smile formed on your lips as an idea that popped up in your head. “(Wait, hold on... Oh, great!)”
“Hey, don't be rude! He’s complimenting you and asking you a question politely! At least take off that mask and show us a real smile!” the second guy says in a tone that kinda combined threatening and jokingly while sitting right next to his friend trying to touch your knee but you shove it away from his grasp. Although he wasn't as drunk as the other one, he still smelled like he took a whole shower with alcohol and you weren’t about to let a gross man who talked to you that way touch your body. At least, not yet.
You stayed calm and kept ignoring those guys in front of you until the subway stops at your station. You head out the wagon and just as expected and desired, the two men followed you while yelling at you in a failed attempt to get your attention. As soon as you saw a nice alley, you took a turn and waited for them to corner you.
“(Perfect.)” you think before leaning back on the wall of the dead end. They got closer to you. “Hmm... I’ve got nothing else to do tonight, y’know?” you say with your voice slightly high-pitched in an attempt to sound interested and completely seduced. “And to be honest, it has been a pretty boring day so far. Sooo... What do you guys think about having a little quick fun, hm? Here and now? For free, if you want.” you wrapped your arms around the neck of the least drunk guy and rubbed your left leg on his side. Both of them looked at each other like they just hit a nice big jackpot.
The least drunk one holds your leg up a bit more. “Shit! But out here?” he scoffs. “You sure about that?”
“Why not? Nobody will know. And nobody can hear us either. Now, why don't you start over here and find out what’s waiting for you?” you said pointing at your chest. The guy obeys you and unbuttons the first button of your coat revealing a pretty little rose quartz necklace. “Nice necklace,” he comments while going for the third button.  “Thanks. It's the thing that will help me send you straight to the gates of Hell.” he stops and looks at you as if you said something absurd. “What-?” Before he could even finish his question, your necklace started shining stopping his and his friend's whole body. You smiled childishly and walked back from them. This is the night they both die for approaching you inappropriately.
All it took was a small movement of your hand to lift up the two men in the air and slam them against the wall behind them. You could hear their panicked and pointless screams for help, but you stuck their lips shut so you could think of what to do with them. “Y'know? Most ladies nowadays carry pepper spray or pocket knives to protect themselves from creeps like you two. But for me? I carry something much, much better and far more interesting.” You took out a pair of surgical gloves and a long scalpel from your purse. After you put the gloves on, you took a black mouth mask with a white sharp-toothed grin print on it. You could see how the men were growing more and more terrified. You loved it. “Don't ask me how I got this shit, okay? Oh, that's right! You can't!” you started giggling at your own comment. “Don't worry. Just like you guys say to women before sex, I promise not to hurt you. I’ll be gentle with you.” still using your powers, you started unbuttoning one of the guy's white shirt and approached the scalpel to his body and started carving in his chest and torso the words he told you on the subway: ❛You'd look better in my bed all bent over.❜ His muffled screams gave you so much pleasure. His phrase was done, it was the other guy's turn: ❛At least show us a real smile.❜ “A smile...” you thought out loud. That gave you another idea. “Well, if you want a smile that badly, I can surely give you both one. And I can also make a little tribute to a certain someone.” you lowered the men a little, got face to face with them and began cutting the edges of their mouths upwards all the way to their ears to give both of them a big bloody permanent smile.
You backed up and gave them one final look to judge your work. You were proud of it. So proud you started laughing. You found their pain and suffering hilarious and delectable. You kept on laughing for a few moments until you finally calmed down, sighed and looked at the poor men who looked like they were on the verge of death. “Well, that was fun. Hopefully, this will teach you to not bother a girl because one day, you might fuck with the wrong bitch,” and with that said, you used the powers of your necklace to change into your clown costume. “and get what you fuckin' deserve.” Yes, your admiration for the Joker made you create a clown persona for yourself. After changing and letting out that last sentence, you cut the guys' wrists all the way up to their forearms making them bleed out and slit their throats twice. You wanted to be the last thing they see before dying. Once you made sure they were undoubtedly dead, you let them fall down from the wall on the dirty water from the alley.
Suddenly, a burst of laughter made you turn your face to the entrance of the alley just to find the strange man from the subway slowly taking his big coat and hat off, revealing a very unexpected surprise: the Joker. He threw his coat and hat on the dirty floor as if he could just get new ones with the snap of his fingers, and proceeded to walk towards you while applauding you slowly. Once he shortened the distance between the two of you he spoke “Well, that certainly was quite a show, sweetheart!” he said between laughter and eventually stopped. You couldn’t believe the man who started these rebellions against the rich of Gotham and killed Murray Franklin on his own show was standing in front of you and saying that he enjoyed the atrocious act you just performed.
You took your right hand on your chest surprised and pleased with his comment and smiled proudly looking at the dead bodies and then turning to see him again “The Joker complimenting my... Killing skills? Thank you so much, sir! I’m quite flattered!” you said giggling because of your little pun and doing a funny British lady curtsy to him. He was the Clown Prince of Crime after all. You wanted to show him your respect. “I saw the whole thing,” he said starting to walk around you and examining you completely. “the way these... Pieces of scum were talking to you on the subway, the way you, SOMEHOW, pinned them to the fuckin' wall, how you made sure they suffered for their actions,” he looked deep into your eyes while grabbing your chin “the way you gave them a smile in my honor,” you pulled your mask under your chin and offered him a big smiled that showed your teeth “and how you didn't let them go until you made sure they were dead. Not bad! Not bad at all.” You giggled and looked at the corpses. “Thanks, it really means a lot coming from you.”
“Your techniques are something special and you’re pretty interesting, doll. Your name?” you thought for a second. You didn’t really think of giving your clown persona a name. Then you knew what to respond. “Melody. My clown name is Melody.” you looked at him while he lighted up a cigarette and took a long drag. “Melody, huh? That’s a nice name. A name perfect for a murderer. Would you like me to walk you home?” you thought about it for a second. You respected him and supported him, yes, but allowing him to know where you live knowing how dangerous he is? You couldn’t risk your safety like that. “I appreciate the offer, sir, thank you very much, but I’m afraid I’ll have to decline it.” he gave you a side-smile. “I understand why, no worries, doll, but first I would like to hand you a little something” he searched into his red suit jacket and handed you over a small card. You read both sides carefully. You raised an eyebrow. “A medical condition, huh? So that’s what it is?” he turned to you shocked and took the card from your hand “Whoopsie, wrong card!” he says with a chuckle and hands you over a different one with a direction. “Why are you giving me this?” you asked innocently. “In case someone as powerful and strong such as yourself decides to join me and my people, leave behind the boring working life and try something exciting, you’ll know where to find me.” you couldn’t believe the Joker thought of you as powerful and strong! You thought for a second. “How do you know I won’t use this to turn you to the police, though?” you didn’t understand why he trusted you this much after meeting you just a couple of minutes ago. “You won’t. And if you do, or someone else finds this card and chooses to be a snitch, it won’t matter. I always manage to escape. On my own or with the help of the people.” he took a long drag of his cigarette and exhale it while looking at his right. That looked awesome! As if he knew he was the big boss. You gave him a smile. “Thank you so much for the offer. I’ll think about it, but I gotta get back home now.” you started walking past him. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Joker” you looked at him and waved him goodbye. “And it certainly was a pleasure to meet you... Miss Melody.” you left the alley with a smile. You lied about thinking it over. You knew EXACTLY what to do.
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elysianslove · 4 years
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Hi! <3 I'm the roomate hc anon again (lol) and can I request best friends to lovers hc for iwaizumi, kuroo and oikawa? Also this blog is gonna blow up soon so remember me when you're famous bro 😌✊️❤️
OMG HI AGAIN! i’m so sorry this is late :( but oh my the excitement that flooded through me when i saw this request hsvhjsd. i really hope you enjoy this!! also vshdks i luv u bb THANK YOU.
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iwaizumi hajime
im making these as detailed as fuck so i apologize in advance <3
becoming best friends with hajime was a very out of the blue thing 
the two of you shared a lot of classes together, and since you were always seeing each other, you’d choose each other as partners a lot 
you’d sit next to him in all the classes that you could
you’d meet up a lot during school breaks and just hang out 
you two clicked very well honestly, like you found that it was so easy to talk to him, and it was so easy to lose yourself in the conversation 
most of your convos are v mature and sophisticated too like
it’s nice when you can talk to someone on the same brain wavelength as you yk 😼
anyways overtime you’d come to his practice sessions, and even if they were long you’d just stay and watch bc why not
if you had hw to do and he noticed you were a lil stressed about it, he’d tell u to come study while he practiced as a change of scenery and all 
he’d walk you home almost every night at this point
oikawa noticing and being jealous <3 
“they’re stealing you from me!” “they’re not— what is wrong with you oikawa.” 
okay so this best friend stuff has been going on for a long time
long enough for you to realize you wanted more from him
but this is iwaizumi hajime and it’s almost impossible to know what he’s thinking 
like
ever 
so you just keep it to yourself, thinking it’s just a small crush and it’s not worth ruining what the two of you have at this rate 
so all this had happened first year, and when you’re nearing the end of your second year
that’s when you realize that
shit
it’s not just a crush
and when you have feelings for someone, every little thing they do expands a million times in your head
so a hug from him that you’d once never go over twice has you thinking about it as you go to sleep
the hoodies he’d lend you during practice while you stayed in the gym bc it was ungodly cold in there now send tingles down your spine at the lingering scent of him
the way he’d grab your hand to drag you somewhere now leave a heavy effect on your palm, forcing you to trace it once he’s gone 
his texts give you butterflies 
every time his name pops up on your phone screen you have a mini heart attack
and yeah
those are all symptoms of a crush
but is a crush meant to last this long? 
at the start of your third year, you greet him outside of the school gates after not seeing you all summer
he smiles so bright and hugs you so, so tightly 
you already are so hyperaware of how strong iwa is
but the feelings you have for him that won’t go away are so not helping your fixation on the feel of his biceps 
anyways before this becomes v nsfw 
you two catch up like u had met yesterday 
and then at the end of the day, after practice, which you stay for bc u missed ur vbc boys 🥺
he walks you home 
like always
and as he stands by your front door, in a burst of courage, he takes your hand in his and pulls you harshly towards him, pushing his body against yours and capturing your lips in a heated kiss
it’s so messy and harsh and you pretty much collided 
but holy shit
you were pretty sure fireworks erupted when you two kissed
years of pining and what had felt like unrequited love finally being resolved 
it’s the most satisfying feeling ever
you never want to stop kissing him
but alas </3 
when he pulls back, you’re both breathing so heavily 
you’re not sure if it’s the adrenaline or the kiss itself 
and he just looks at you and goes “did u tan while you’re away ur eyes look brighter” 
no sir i am in love with you
when you two officiate things 
he’s actually way shyer than he was as best friends??? 
like as best friends he wouldn’t feel slightly weird about hugging you in public or grabbing at your hand randomly or being seen alone with you
but now like
people know ??? and somehow that scares iwa 
or makes him uncomfortable 
idk he just feels iffy
but ur so understanding bless ur heart <3 
ur so careful with him and take it at his own pace 
zero pda at the start of the relationship 
like he won’t even wanna hug u in front of the seijoh team 
but slowly he warms up 
and he starts getting more comfortable with things like hand holding and occasional pecks on the cheek/lips 
your traditions as best friends don’t die as lovers 
if anything you believe in them even more 
now you watch more diligently during practice 
you proudly attend his games in his jersey, cheering the loudest for him (and for the rest of the boys bc they: best) 
walks home with you are so much more serene 
always gives you a kiss before he parts ways 
idk it’s like some sort of commemoration for your first kiss/confession 
unless you invite him inside 😏
this is so fucking long im so sorry i just love iwa 
anyways anybody want boyfriend!iwa headcanons i got a lot hehe 
to conclude, it was so gradual and inevitable with the two of you, and you’re forever glad it happened when it did and you hadn’t rushed anything <3333
oikawa tōru
unlike hajime, this wasn’t something that took one or two years
this bitch couldn’t admit he was in love with you for like 10 years okay 
you’ve known him for the majority of your life, because you’d always lived in close proximity to each other 
but you were never best friends yk? just acquaintances 
it was around the end of middle school when you two got close
cause you saw he was applying to aoba johsai for high school
and you were like !!! i’m going there too 
at first he was like stop copying me 😾 
you guys had a staring contest bc y’all are idiots and there were legit tears streaming down ur face but u were not about to lose to a pissbaby like him
he blinked 😁👍🏼
and he lost 
and then he decided “you’re my best friend now ” 
anyways aside iwa, he now had someone else he was going into high school with
like it’s a completely new environment but he had two people he very much liked going with him !!! 
when the time came around to like apply for/join clubs, you had been so clueless 
but toru stuck by you !! and he was so adamant on helping you !! 
he would sit with you after school as he practiced tossing with hajime and just brainstorm with you what you liked to do
it’s what brought you two closer together
cause you realized just how many things in common you had with him 
for a full week he tried to help you come up with something
for the sake of this hc let’s say u decide to join the newsletter club 
you’re very wary at first but then he’s like when ur part of it you’ll visit the vbc regularly so u can take pictures/observe to write essays 
the fact that toru would be there kinda set you at ease 
now you’ve never seen toru play properly 
he’s practiced in front of you before
plenty of times
but a proper match? or a practice one? 
never 
so it’s safe to say u were in awe when you got assigned to go watch a practice match against (idk pick a school) 
it’s embarrassing to admit but your eyes were on him the entire time 
thank god he became the captain later on else it’d be so sus 
you really tried to pay attention to anybody else lmfao 
it’s kinda what drew you to him more
you still didn’t really have feelings
you only realized just how passionate he is about everything 
at some point you had an essay to write for your newsletter about the volleyball club
but you were having a hard time like really getting into it
so you immediately just called toru and were like “help 😃” 
he came over and you asked him a bunch of questions, and he would go on deadass 20 min rants for each of them
you were just 
so amazed 
like how could someone have so much passion for something like this?
you realize how but that’s for later
overtime you two got closer bc of how much your work was associated with him
he’s incredible as a best friend 
he’s the first one with the school’s weekly newsletter as soon as it’s out
granted it’s to read the section about him but yk, the sentiment’s there 
also love, love, loves lazy days with you 
he doesnt even care if the boys know that he worships the chick flicks you two watch 
i feel like oikawa would be an avid anime watcher
idk why i just do 
so he’d be blasting anime theme songs on a speaker as you’re in the shower and he’s in your room waiting for you and you’re both just singing w the sound of water rushing down 
actually it’s not just anime songs it’s all songs 
a l l songs 
anyways
so you two get really close, and then he has a super important match coming up 
let’s say it’s the spring interhigh one against karasuno
the one they won
idk im just choosing at random 
and the night before he’s like begging you on text to wear his jersey
he’s like PLEASE NO ONE’S EVER DONE THAT FOR ME
you’re like bruh u have a cult following ????? 
but eventually u say yes
ur not really sure where it’s coming from but this is oikawa he’s an unpredictable as can be
when you show up in a jersey he so conveniently left at your house once
he’s so genuinely shocked even though he was the one that asked for this???
gives you the biggest hug like spins you around and just 
“you’re my lucky charm” 
when he wins 
after celebrating with his team
he runs over to you
and just
he kisses you
full on the mouth
it’s probably the rush and excitement of winning that gave him the courage to finally spill all his feelings out into this kiss
you’re in his jersey, in the stands and you genuinely feel like it’s only just the two of you
despite how sudden it was the kiss is so gentle, like he’d been planning it since forever 
“i told you you’re my lucky charm” he says as he rests his forehead against yours and kisses you gently again
oikawa had already been affectionate as your best friend
always displaying his love outwardly with like always calling out your name so loud whenever he sees you and giving you bone crushing hugs
deadass his 6’0 self will just jump on you 
but now it’s extra
makki always gags around the two of you but you just stick ur tongue out at him and go “ur just mad ur best friend’s getting some pussy/dick and ur not” 
makki then proceeds to shriek at you like a fucking banshee <3 
anyways 
yes 
oikawa best friends to lovers excellence is so cute eeeekkk
and now u always wear his jersey at games 
(u couldnt make it to the game against karasuno where they lost for whatever reason and he held it against u for the longest time)
(“maybe if a certain someone were there we wouldn’t have lost”)
what a big baby you love him
kuroo tetsurō
AH SEXY CHEMISTRY NERD 👅👅👅
kuroo as ur best friend 
im frothing 
i feel like you’d grow close after meeting at an event or something 
like you’re a friend of a friend of a friend 
i see kuroo as someone who’s so suave and cool and flirty with people he doesn’t have feelings for
but put the crush factor in and he’s a mess
like his brain just stops working
so when he first met you
he thought u were so fucking hot 
but that’s it
his lower body was doing all the thinking <3 
so he was so flirty 
and that’s essentially what your friendship is built off of 
and when friends are so flirty with each other, they generally grow close and trust each other really quickly 
ur not a nekoma student but ur in tokyo so you meet up often 
you just
it’s so nice to be around him
you find it so easy to just be yourself around him 
going out with him is super fun 
and a lot of the times you guys have study dates and you literally don’t talk except during the 10 min breaks you two take
it’s just hyper focus for the two of you which is great
he really channels the best student in you what a man ! 
i think during your third year of high school you two got insanely close
because you were highly unsure if you were gonna leave japan or stay 
so you wanted to make the most out of everything 
so you’d go out with him more often
he’d stay during the weekends and you two would like bake christmas goods all night even if it’s literally september lmfao
cuddling is so natural 
like you’re both so touchy with each other but not in a weird way just a super comfortable kind of way
like if you’re shorter than him, he’s always leaning his arm on you like you’re his arm rest 
it’s a win win bc he gets to touch you and tease you
wow the horny really jumped out in that one
anyways
you go to every single one of his games !!
cheer him on so!! fucking!! loud!!
you probably make a provocative sign and stand a chair and just wave it around and kuroo’s so heart eyes lmfao
the climb up to becoming lovers is so
natural? 
i think kuroo first realizes that maybe, yk, he wants those flirtatious comments to mean something and those random touches to hold more romantic value to them, when you two are out together
it’s a completely chill day and it’s not really warm not really chilly. you’re just comfortable 
he takes you to a park after buying the both of you ice cream from the stand across the street and sits down at a bench with you
just people watching 
and then it kinda goes really silent
but 
it’s not awkward??? like at all???
he’s not looking to fill the silence with any random words
he’s just
enjoying simply being with you
and he glances at you momentarily and it hits him like so hard just how pretty you are 
his eyes slightly widen like
holy fuck
what the f u ck
remember when i said he’s all cool until feelings come into play
yeah 😼
he literally freezes up and blurts out, without even meaning to, “i think i have feelings for you.” 
he really didnt even process he said that
you kinda
pause for a second
and then you realize what you said and you just smile and lean over towards him, lifting your thumb up to the corner of his lips and brushing away some ice cream
“you think?” you tease, and then at the spot where the ice cream was misplaced, you placed a gentle kiss
he kinda relaxes and then eyes you as he says, “i know.” 
it is just. heaven after that
i think the two of you would be less flirty around each other once becoming official 
like yeah he definitely comments once or twice every now and then and don’t get me wrong, so do you
but it’s just less frequent 
like a blanket has been lifted to uncover the true, hidden meanings behind the comments and you can now just breathe easier 
you two end up in the same uni on accident hevejsk
like you had a long ass talk about how it’s okay if you didn’t end up in the same uni you’d still make it work
and it would’ve worked tbh
fate just ships you two too much
when you told each other you were literally that spiderman meme of the two spidermen pointing at each other lmao
power couple of the uni
power couple of tokyo
power couple of japan
you’re literally so happy with him you wouldn’t trade him for the world 
and maybe you saw it coming 
but it still remains a shock whenever you wake up and he’s there laying next to you, smiling lazily at you before reaching over to give you a gentle kiss 
anyways happy early birthday king i love you kuroo hehe
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end note; i really had a lotta fun w this one omg!! thank you again for requesting, anon, and i hope everybody else enjoyed!! feel free to request, mwah <3
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elysianslove · 4 years
Note
Hello! I know this may not be your thing but I decided to give it a shot, if not no biggy!
I was wondering if you would be interested in writing Gojo and/or Sakuna with an asexual lover? (One that doesnt feel sexual attraction but doesnt mind kissing and cuddling etc and loves physical affection but nothing beyond that?) And like, how a relationship with that kind of person would come to be?
Because Sakuna and Gojo both give off *he totally fucks* vibes.
So how they ended up with an asexual lover would be interesting, maybe the MC rejects their advances because fear of being hated for being Ase? Because they know that the other person definitely fucks.
How would their relationship work? How would the guy react/comfort the MC.
(Maybe it ends with a epilogue with no sex(as in penetration and blowjobs to be exact but mc later in a relationship would be willing to do things like handjobs and other hands on/Using toys to pleasure their partner because they cant in that way) but lots of passionate makeout sessions/kissing/sucking and worshiping the mc's body? Especially the collar bone)
If you arent into it that's cool! I totally get it!
This is pretty self indulgent after all ahahaha it's hard being an asexual in fandoms lmao.
hi my love!! okay to start off, i’m really honored you sent in this request to me. idk just the fact that you’re trusting me with it is really sweet hehe. i’m fairly knowledgable about sexuality but i don’t like to write about things i’m not 100% sure about because i don’t wanna risk doing anything wrong or accidentally offending you! but!! thank you for going into detail with the request, and i hope this is what you were looking for, and that i didn’t do any mistakes <3
i wrote headcanons so i can go into detail and write for both!! 
some nsfw under the cut, my loves! <3
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ryomen sukuna 
i’d say, to begin with, it would take a small while for sukuna to even be accepting of his own feelings towards you. nothing having to do with your sexuality, just you in general, specifically that you’re human and so different from him. i don’t think sex ever crosses his mind, at least at the start, because he’s too busy being really angry over the way he can’t seem to control his reactions to every little thing you do. so he himself won’t actively work at starting a relationship with you.
but he will realize, over time, that you’re not doing anything either, even though he’s been noticing that you’re not pushing him or his advances away. like any act of protectiveness that involves him physically touching you intimately, you don’t reject, and you’re always ready to retort at any quip he had. he could tell that these feelings he had for you were mutual, he was just so confused as to why you weren’t doing anything about it.
sukuna’s a thousand year old cursed spirit. he does not know shit about sexuality. i think the way he’d look at it is fuck who you want and fuck who you like. i feel like nicki minaj’s said that before, has she? he doesn’t like thinking too much about it, you know? 
his confession would probably be a kiss because words? he doesn’t know them. when he feels you return the kiss he’s, deep down, elated, really, and this is simply because of his naturally sexual personality, he starts hinting at more, until you stop him. he’s really confused because you just kissed him back? you’ve been kissing him for so long why do you want to stop now? he can see the fear steadily growing in your eyes and he’s even more confused now he’s just. humans are so weird. 
when you cautiously tell him, “i don’t want to go further than this. is that okay?” you look like you’re waiting for the world to erupt in your face. he just frowns and shrugs like, “yeah but that’s not the point. do you not want me?” 
it takes about an hour and a half for sukuna to properly process what you’re saying. at first he’s so thrown off by it, not by you! he just can’t process the fact that someone doesn’t feel any sexual attraction towards someone or doesn’t crave sex at all. it’s not that he’s rude about it, it’s just a really foreign concept to him, you know? when you add that it’s just sex, and you’re okay with a lot of other things, the gears in his brain finally start working again and he just goes. 
*shrugs* ok. 
literally lmao. like i said earlier, sukuna doesn’t give a shit like whatever do what you want. 
because of the rush of emotions he’s feeling towards you, and the fact that this in itself, a relationship, and a relationship with a human too, he doesn’t really focus on the fact that he might want more from you. he’s easily satisfied with a lengthy make out session, and he admits it to you every time he sees you get a little anxious or unsure of yourself. 
however, his needs do grow with your relationship. it’s kind of clumsy, your transition into a proper long term relationship, especially with sukuna, but you two make it work. 
you agree to try different ways to pleasure him, even if he kinda rushes through them because he’s generally just excited to have your hands on him. at first he’s content with anything you’re offering, but it makes him feel kinda useless when you won’t let him touch you and you have to remind him that your needs are different than his and that you’re sated differently.
i see sukuna as a curious and experimental guy, so he would definitely let you use toys on him. nothing too extreme, because he still needs that sense of control, but you do use some toys like a fleshlight or a vibrator to rile him up. he likes using your hand too, because it’s always so soft against him and it feels a hundred times better than any toy. he learns not to overstep any boundaries though, and not to do anything that might make you uncomfortable even if it takes him a little longer. like i said, the whole idea is just different to him, so it takes him a while to understand, and he’s still learning as he goes!
he loves your make out sessions, especially after you establish your boundaries and your limits and what you’re willing to do for him. he absolutely adores leaving your skin a sky of blue, pink and purple it sends chills down his spine marking you like that. he’s always touching you all over, and just loves to grab and knead at your skin. 
in the proper long term, he doesn’t mind it at all tbh. the two of you develop a system, and he’s okay with it. the same way you would never cross his boundaries and force him to do anything he doesn’t want, he’d do for you too! it really never truly mattered, and it truly never will.
gojō satoru
different from sukuna, i think gojō would definitely be knowledgable about things like this. idk he just seems like the kind of guy that’s innately so aware of everything around him, and can read people exceptionally well.
he probably picked up on the fact that you weren’t comfortable with sex, or just didn’t experince sexual attraction, on his own, but never really brought it up because it was never his place. but the same way he picks up on that, he picks up on your obvious crush on him. he pays both details no specific attention until he starts to realize his own feelings for you, and begins on his subtle advances.
he tried to make his advances as sfw as possible, you know? just in case his suspicions were confirmed to be true. he was just extra flirty, sometimes touchy but never in an inappropriate way. very subtilely like always having your shoulders or knees touching or dusting of your jacket or feeding you a piece of his food. cute little things like that.
he gets super worried when he notices you start to distance yourself from him, because he can’t imagine what he might’ve did to push you away. he overthinks a little, worried that he overstepped his boundaries or made you uncomfortable in any way, but he isn’t afraid to approach you about it, to make sure he doesn’t repeat his mistakes, especially with someone like you, who he’s slowly growing more and more infatuated by. 
when you admit to him you’re asexual, he realizes he was right, but then he’s like, “and? did i do something?” and now it’s your turn to be confused because here you were worried about rejection but here he was worried about you? 
this specific incident is what makes you let loose and finally just freely admit your feelings for him. he’s ecstatic about it, seriously! all that’s on his mind is that he gets to go on a date with someone he really likes. sex is the last thing on his mind, and yeah, you’ll eventually have to talk about it, but not for now. it’s for later, when things get a little more serious. 
they do get serious, to both your delights, but the dreaded moment is approaching you. gojō definitely sits you down and says, “we’re only having this talk so i know never to do anything outside of your limits. everything about this relationship is 50/50, and i want to know ways to make you feel good, too.” 
please sir your hand in marriage.
i definitely believe gojō’s a kinky guy, and is more than willing to try out literally any sex toy you pull at him. genuinely, he’ll try anything you wanna try. if you ever offer a handjob, he’ll ask a million times over if you’re sure. usually, he likes to just do it himself, but have you there next to him. he won’t touch you, but your hands will be in his hair, and you’ll be kissing his neck, or just murmuring how much you love him in his ear, just spurring him on. he knows the last thing on your mind is anything sexual, but there’s just something about being under your watchful, almost bored gaze as he fucks himself.
anyways before i get too into it lmfao, he loves kissing you. loves loves loves it. not even full blown make out sessions, just gentle, serene kissing. he can kiss you for hours. 
he is also incredible at body worship and praise. paints your pretty collarbone pink and purple, whispers about how you’re perfect for him, describes all your features to you like poetry. he’s an incredible lover, really. nothing can make him fall out of love with you, absolutely nothing. 
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