#“Custom Swimming Caps”

[euroswimcap]

Why Custom Swimming Hats are Essential for Swimmers and Teams: A Guide to Choosing the Best Options - Euro Swim Caps

Swimming hats are more than just a functional accessory for keeping hair dry and reducing drag in the water. They have become a popular means of expression and team unity, especially with the rise of Custom Swimming Hats. Personalized swim hats not only boost team spirit and identity but also allow swimmers to represent their unique style in the pool. In this guide, we’ll explore the benefits, uses, and features of Swimming Hats, with insights on why Euro Swim Caps is a top choice for high-quality, customizable swim caps.

The Role of Swimming Hats in Performance and Style

Why Are Swimming Hats Important?

Wearing a Swimming Hat isn’t just about looking the part; it offers several functional benefits that enhance performance, protect hair, and maintain hygiene. Here’s why every swimmer should wear a hat:

Reduces Drag: By covering the hair, a Swimming Hat creates a smoother profile, reducing resistance and helping swimmers move more efficiently through the water.

Protects Hair from Chlorine: Chlorine can be harsh on hair, making it dry and brittle. A good-quality swim cap, like those from Euro Swim Caps, provides a protective barrier that limits chlorine exposure.

Improves Visibility and Safety: Many pools require swimmers to wear caps for better visibility, especially in crowded lanes. Brightly colored Swimming Hats are easy to spot, adding a layer of safety.

Enhances Hygiene: Wearing a cap prevents hair from entering the pool, helping to keep the water cleaner and more hygienic for all swimmers.

Promotes Team Unity and Identity: For swim teams, custom hats with unique designs, logos, or names promote a sense of unity and help build team identity.

Choosing the Right Swimming Hat

When selecting a Swimming Hat, consider factors such as material, fit, and design. Swim caps come in various materials, each with its advantages:

Silicone: Durable, flexible, and comfortable, silicone caps are ideal for regular swimmers. They’re easy to put on and take off without pulling hair, making them a popular choice.

Latex: Lightweight and snug-fitting, latex swim caps provide a sleek fit but may not be as durable as silicone. They’re commonly used in competitions.

Lycra or Fabric: Soft and comfortable, Lycra caps are best for leisure swimming rather than competitive training, as they offer less drag resistance.

With these choices, Euro Swim Caps offers a range of materials tailored to different swimming needs, ensuring swimmers find the best fit for their preferences.

Why Choose Custom Swimming Hats?

The Benefits of Customization

Custom Swimming Hats offer a unique advantage, especially for teams, brands, and individual swimmers looking for personalization. Customized swim caps allow you to add personal flair, showcase team logos, or highlight sponsor branding, adding a sense of professionalism and unity in competitive environments. Here’s why customization matters:

Brand Visibility: Custom hats allow swim teams or sponsors to display their logos, making them easily identifiable. Whether at a local meet or an international competition, Custom Swimming Hats create a memorable impression.

Team Cohesion and Pride: Nothing boosts team spirit like wearing matching, customized gear. A personalized Swimming Hat from Euro Swim Caps strengthens team pride, unity, and motivation.

Individuality and Style: For individual swimmers, customizing a swim cap can reflect personal style, creating a unique look that sets them apart in the pool.

Recognition and Awards: Custom caps make great awards or gifts for team achievements, personal milestones, or special events, serving as a lasting memento.

How to Create Your Custom Swimming Hats with Euro Swim Caps

Creating a custom swim cap with Euro Swim Caps is simple, and the results are high-quality and durable. The process involves selecting your preferred material, color, and design, then adding logos, text, or any specific details you want. Euro Swim Caps uses high-quality printing techniques that ensure designs are vibrant and long-lasting, even after repeated use in the water.

Understanding the Different Types of Swimming Hats

1. Competitive Swimming Hats

Competitive swimmers require Swimming Hats that offer minimal drag and maximum durability. Silicone and latex caps are ideal for competitive settings as they fit tightly, creating a streamlined shape. Euro Swim Caps provides a variety of options for competitive swimmers, ensuring they have the right cap to enhance performance.

2. Training and Leisure Swimming Hats

For regular training or recreational swimming, comfort and durability are key. Lycra caps are often preferred in these settings, as they are gentle on hair and easy to wear. Euro Swim Caps offers Lycra caps that are soft, comfortable, and available in various colors and designs.

3. Customizable Team Hats

Swim teams benefit from customized caps that display their logos and colors. Custom Swimming Hats from Euro Swim Caps allow teams to represent their identity while reaping the benefits of high-quality swim caps designed for performance. Custom team hats are available in various materials, including silicone and latex, ensuring each team can choose the best option for their needs.

Caring for Your Swimming Hats

To extend the lifespan of your Swimming Hats, proper care is essential. Here are some tips to maintain the quality of your caps, especially if they are custom-made:

Rinse After Use: Rinse your hat with fresh water after each use to remove chlorine, salt, and other chemicals.

Dry Properly: Pat your cap dry with a towel, but avoid stretching it excessively. Allow it to air dry completely before storing it.

Avoid Sharp Objects: Keep your cap away from sharp objects that could puncture or tear the material.

Store in a Cool Place: Extreme heat can damage swim caps, so store your Swimming Hats in a cool, dry place.

By following these tips, you can enjoy long-lasting performance from your Euro Swim Caps products.

Why Euro Swim Caps is the Preferred Brand for Swimming Hats

Euro Swim Caps has established itself as a leader in the swimming accessory industry, known for producing high-quality, durable, and stylish Swimming Hats. Here’s why swimmers and teams trust Euro Swim Caps:

Quality Assurance: Euro Swim Caps uses premium materials that ensure durability, comfort, and performance, making them a trusted brand among competitive and leisure swimmers alike.

Customization Expertise: Specializing in Custom Swimming Hats, Euro Swim Caps allows swimmers to express their unique style or team identity with vibrant, professional-grade printing.

Wide Range of Options: From silicone to latex and Lycra, Euro Swim Caps offers an extensive selection of materials and designs to suit every swimmer’s preference.

Commitment to Customer Satisfaction: Euro Swim Caps is dedicated to providing excellent customer service, helping clients choose the right products and offering guidance on customization options.

Whether you’re a competitive swimmer looking for a performance boost or a team seeking a unified look, Euro Swim Caps has the perfect Swimming Hat for you.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I choose between silicone and latex swimming hats? Silicone caps are durable, stretchy, and gentle on hair, making them a great option for frequent swimmers. Latex caps are thinner and offer a snug fit, ideal for competitions where drag reduction is essential.

Can I customize a swimming hat for personal use? Absolutely! Euro Swim Caps offers custom options for individuals who want to add a personal touch to their swimming hats.

How long do swimming hats last? With proper care, swimming hats can last for several months or even years. Factors such as frequency of use, material, and care habits affect their longevity.

Do custom designs fade over time? Euro Swim Caps uses high-quality printing techniques that ensure designs remain vibrant and fade-resistant, even with regular use in chlorinated water.

Are custom swimming hats available for kids? Yes, Euro Swim Caps offers customizable options for all ages, including kids’ sizes.

Conclusion: Enhance Your Swimming Experience with Euro Swim Caps

Investing in a quality Swimming Hat enhances your experience in the water, whether you’re training, competing, or swimming for leisure. The right cap reduces drag, protects hair, and allows swimmers to express their identity through customization. With Euro Swim Caps, you have access to a wide range of Custom Swimming Hats that combine functionality with style, catering to both individual swimmers and teams.

For those seeking a reliable, high-quality Swimming Hat provider, Euro Swim Caps is a top choice. Explore the variety of options available, personalize your swim cap, and make a statement in the pool. Embrace the benefits of wearing a quality swim cap from Euro Swim Caps and see the difference it makes in your swimming performance and comfort. Whether you’re an athlete or a recreational swimmer, Euro Swim Caps has the perfect hat for you. Dive in and make a splash with confidence and style!

Visit our website now to place your order!

Website: Euro Swim Caps Email: info@euroswimcaps.com Call us: +44 1384 262335

[swimhat12]

Why Opt for Swim Hats and Printed Swimming Caps for Enhanced Performance and Personalization – Swim Hat Co

Swim hats and printed swimming caps have transformed from basic accessories to essential gear for swimmers at every level. Whether you’re a casual swimmer, a competitive athlete, or part of a swim team, investing in high-quality swim hats not only improves performance but also offers a unique opportunity for self-expression and team identity. This guide explores the benefits of swim hats and printed swimming caps, highlighting why Swim Hat Co is the go-to choice for swimmers seeking both functionality and style.

Visit website to make your order.

Website: www.swimhatco.com/ E-mail: sales@swimhatco.com Call: +44 1384 262335

[swimink]

Choosing the Right Swim Caps: A Guide for High Schools, Swim Schools, and Custom Designs

Swim caps are an essential part of any swimmer's gear & they are especially necessary for high school swim teams and swim schools. Not only do they protect hair from chlorine damage. Swim caps for High Schools also help to streamline the swimmer's head and reduce drag in the water.

In this blog post, we will explore the different types of swim caps available for high schools & swim schools also custom swim cap designs. We'll cover the pros and cons of each type and provide tips for choosing the best swim cap for your needs.

First, we'll look at swim caps for high schools. We'll discuss the importance of choosing caps that are durable, comfortable, and easy to put on and take off. We'll also cover the different materials available, including silicone, latex, and lycra.

Next, we'll explore swim caps for swim schools. We'll talk about the importance of choosing caps that are easy to clean and sanitize, and we'll cover some of the features that are especially important for swim school use, such as bright colors for easy identification and adjustable sizing for a variety of head sizes.

Finally, we'll dive into the world of custom swim caps. We'll talk about the benefits of designing your caps, including team spirit and brand recognition. We'll also cover the different customization options available, such as color, logo placement, and text.

By the end of this blog post, you'll have a better understanding of the different types of swim caps available and which ones are best suited for your specific needs. Whether you're a high school swim coach, a swim school owner, or just looking to design your custom swim caps, this guide has got you covered.

[swiminkonline]

Silicone custom printed swim caps

Stand out in the water with Swimink's silicone custom printed swim caps. Personalize your swim gear and make a lasting impression with vibrant designs and superior quality. Dive into the world of custom swim caps and elevate your swimming experience with Swimink.

[hoshigray]

Just want to start and say hiiiii I love the work you put out and I can't get over how amazing they are. Since you said your inbox is open I was thinking about Life Guard Choso and a little lips to lips action by the pool side at night. Include anything else you see fit I don't mind☺️.

𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: omg tyyyy !! and yippee, a choso request :DD haven't written for him in a long while

⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: lifeguard! Choso x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - kissing; making out - sexual acts in a public place; hotel pool room - breast fondling + sucking - fingering (f! receiving) - oral (m! + f! receiving) - praising - implied v + p insertion (ends with cowgirl) - implied unprotected sex (psa: don't be silly; wrap the willy) - cameo: Nobara (best friend) - Choso having a lil crush on reader, and lowkey being horny on the job, lawl - reader lowkey being flirty and taking the lead role.

⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.7k

“—Khhh, ohooo, ohhhmyGod, Chosoooo, your tongue feels so good!”

“Hoooohh, Ch’soooo, right there! Keep scraping me right there…!”

As lifeguarding night shifts go, last night’s had to be the most bewildering Choso has ever endured.

He sits on the lifeguard chair, observing the indoor pool area inside the hotel where he’s working during spring break.  Luckily, there weren’t many customers coming to use the pool during his shifts — especially the night ones. So, all Choso had to do was watch the hours go by, go to his lunch break, and occasionally come back if he was called in for the night shift. 

What sounds like a manageable task turns out to be otherwise because someone is sitting at the edge of the pool and captures Choso’s observant brown eyes from time to time. It’s you, sitting at the edge with your feet submerged in the water as you converse with your friend — he picks up their name is Nobara – about the joys of your spring break adventures for the past few days. 

Your frequent giggles and sweet voice are difficult for him to ignore, sneaking glances under his cap to see you, shooting himself internally for taking advantage to look at you in your cute one-piece swimsuit that hugged your curves nicely. And then the warmth of his blood swiftly changes to freezing temperature when your eyes land on him, averting his gaze back into the water before him.

The ripples of the water have him thinking back on the night shift last night, his cheeks reddening as he recollects the memories…

It was a lonely shift as Choso was the only person in the indoor pool area. It wasn’t until the hour touched two hours behind midnight when the door opened and came you. As someone who’s been lowkey crushing on you for the past few days, this immediately became the worst-case scenario for the young lifeguard, forced to gawk and examine your graceful swimming and two-piece figure. 

He’s been doing that for a solid fifteen minutes, suffering in silence while his eyes scan the curves of your thighs and legs and follow the droplets of water trickle down to your cleavage. Eyeing you with such indecency, what an inappropriate thing as a lifeguard.

And it comes back to bite him on the ass when you walk out of the pool and approach him to his chair, startling the pecan brown-haired hotel worker. “Hey there,” you say so charmingly, practically inviting him with just the greeting. “I can’t help but think you’re lonely here just watching me swim…Would you humor me and accompany me? Would feel bad I’m the reason you’re here doing your job at such a late hour…”

Choso knew he should shoot down the offer as he was still on duty. However, judging by how it was nearly an hour and a half from closing the pool and that most of the other hotel workers were gone, a tiny part of him was pinching him to accept the proposal of his mini-crush. It’s just a swim, in the water and out, right…?

That’s what he kept telling himself as he was following and talking with you in the pool; although every time you referred to him by his name, swam circles around his rigid body, or tittered at his words, that statement was demonstrated worthless. The lights from inside the water illuminated your frame lured Choso in with every minute, your eyes sparkling like the broken surface tension of the water.

“Hey, Choso,” God, he couldn’t believe you were calling him by his name; it sounded too dreamlike to be reality. “Have you ever given someone CPR?”

“Uhh, yeah, like once or twice,” he replied while averting his eyes to the other side of the room as if that would help his pinkish blush not be seen by you.

“Really?” You probed, bringing your frame for the water to reach your chin. “You must know the procedure pretty well, then…Hey, let me test you then!”

Huh? “What now?”

“Okay, I’m gonna pretend to drown, and you do whatever lifeguard procedure you do to get me out of the water.” You said it with such a beaming attitude that Choso couldn’t tell if you were serious. They can’t be serious…And then, you took a giant breath before allowing your body to be completely submerged in the water, sinking to the pool floor.

Choso looked to where you were for about five seconds; you two were at around the 4th or 5th feet of the pool — there’s no way you had to be serious. But five seconds turned to ten, and you didn’t exhibit any signs of wanting to breach. It caused his jaw to drop; no shot, they’re actually serious!

With haste, Choso waddles down to your spot and drives himself into the water, taken aback in perplexity when you greeted him with a wave. He then brings a hand under your legs and one to your shoulder, breaching with you in bridal style. He voices his bafflement, “Wh–What was that idea?”

“Hahaha, took you long enough; you’re a pretty terrible lifeguard for taking your sweet time rescuing me!” You jest to him, the comment poking right through Choso’s stature and dignity. 

“I didn’t know you were serious or not…”

“Drowning is always a serious issue,” you bat your eyes at him before poking the mark across his face. It wasn’t until then that Choso realized how close he had you, your face two inches away from his, and the top of your two-piece now in his line of sight for your cleavage to capture his dangerous curiosity. He turns his head to show some modesty he has left, but it’s too late; you saw him. A twinge of your lip forms a pleasant grin, “Well, you know what happens next, right?”

He blinks and brings his face back in your direction. Surely you didn’t mean that, asking the following to make sure, “Wh…What?”

“Mouth-to-mouth, of course!” Oh, this was going way too far, the poor lifeguard holding you frozen still at your goal. “Why, you don’t want to put your lips on me? Or were you sneaking glances at me these past few days for nothing?” Another arrow that shot him down; you knew!? “You’re not quite subtle, you know. Hehe, but I find that kinda cute.” 

Choso tried to explain himself, but what only came out was stammers and squeaks. Your gaze had him internally nervous and exposed, so you had to poke him even more, “So? Are you gonna leave your drowning rescuee’s lips alone or save me?”

He gulped at the phrasing, struggling to find the words to give to you. Not you were giving him a chance because your face was moving closer to his every second he didn’t answer. And when your eyelids come down, Choso hesitantly does as well and brings his lips onto your soft ones. 

The first peck was long, yet sweetly introduced you two together. You snaked your hand up his pecs to his neck, inviting him to kiss you a second time. His restraint dissolved with every sedation of your lips on his, and it vanished wholly when his ears picked up a moan. He becomes more adventurous and chews on your bottom lip, and the whimper you let out ignites something that he’s been dying to contain for this long. 

A hot and steamy kiss that was built up to happen here and now, and Choso relishes having you like this like it’s a dream. You break the kiss with a gasp for air, panting alongside him with a smile. “Well then, do I have to tell you what should happen next, too?”

When Choso silently leads you out of the pool with him, you are pleased that you don’t have to.

“—Khhh, ohooo, ohhhmyGod, Chosoooo, your tongue feels so good!”

Choso moved you to one of the cushioned chaise lounge chairs to lie as he ripped you off your bottoms and greeted your lower half with attention. Being between your legs was far from what he ever imagined; however, with how you tase on his tongue and the wails you’re letting out for him, he can’t find it in himself to stop now. 

He licks your clit with a circle, and you squeak at the motion. “Mmmm…feeling’ good there, Y/n?”

“Ohhh, yesss, oh yessss,” you respond with a hazed expression, letting your euphoric sounds fill the quiet indoor pool room occupied by you two. “Fuuuck, lick me more, please…”

Even your requests to him were dear to his ears, obliging your folds with feverish laps and swirls. Your cries become louder, legs jolting with ever every lave and suck of your leaking fluids. But Choso holds you by the thighs, massage them to relax your body. Damn, you felt so soft to his fingers, wanting to have his hands on you for as long as he can.

You bite your lip when your hand grabs tuffs of his down brunette hair, egging him to give your clitoris more kisses and hurried licks that almost have you choke on your spit. “Oh, myGod—Mmmph! You’re so good at this, Choso…Ahhhh, oh fuck, feels too gooood…!”

Choso lifts his head to lock his chocolate eyes with yours, examining your reaction when he switches his tongue with a forefinger bullying inside your vagina. The insertion has your bold jerk upwards, squirming at the finger that’s scraping the velvety texture of your vaginal walls. He then kisses from your thigh up to your abdomen, sucking on your skin to tease. Once he comes up to your top piece, he uses his free hand to bring it up and finally releases your breasts for his eyes to survey. His mouth doesn’t waste time having a nipple inside, licking on the bud as he gropes the other breast.

“Ahhnn! Hahhh, hehe, you look so hot doing that,” you comment, making the young man sneak a glance at you before he sucks and nibbles on the nipple. His finger inside your cunt goes faster, having you whine when his thumb comes to your clit. Swipes to the delicate button erupt howls from your agape mouth, “Ohhhh, Hoooohh, Ch’soooo, right there! Keep scraping me right there…pleaseee, don’t stop…!”

He withdrew from your nipple with a soft “pop” from his lips, bringing his face inches close to yours. “Gonna cum on my fingers, yeah?” He asks to distract you from the sneaking middle finger that invades between your folds. The two digits work together to reach places you couldn’t, rubbing and scratching your inner walls with tips. 

“Yesss, yesss, I’m gonna cum…! More, more—Oh, Ohooo!” Choso kisses you again, and you happily mewl into his lips as your orgasm climbs up with the pace of his fingers and his thumb pressing and swiping on your clit. Your chasm clamps onto his digits, bringing your hands to his face to keep the kiss going as your climax hits you.

Shocks from your body prompt you to tremble under him, the walls of your slit contract around his fingers, and your hips involuntarily sway to ride out the phases of your clarity. You suck on Choso’s tongue; his groans are music to your ears while your hand travels down to his swim trunks and feels the tent of his groin.

He moans, breaking the kiss to look where your hand is. You chuckle, “It’s time to return the favor. Come on, let’s switch.”

He follows your lead and takes the position you had previously, watching you situate yourself between his legs as you bring his trunks down to have his erection spring out. He panics a little when you gasp aloud while marveling at his limb, “My, what a long thing you were hiding from me…”

Your compliment has the blush on his ears scorch him with unbearable heat, and you keep eye contact while your plump lips place kisses on the sensitive pink tip of his cock. He hitches his breath at the contact, especially at your hand, grasping his length and beginning stroking motions.

Your tongue dances around his glans and presses on the frenulum, nibbling on the rough skin while your free hand goes to his testicles, softly kneading them to provoke moans to leave his lips. “Such cute sounds from such a cute guy; keep making more for me, okay?” He places a hand on your head, a sign that you take initiative to pop his dick into your mouth. 

Bobbing your head up and down, you take in Choso’s shaft inch by inch, the warmth of your mouth doing wonders to his senses. A hand grips the cushion of the tongue chair he’s lying on, and shivers crawl up his spine when you mumble after taking it to the hilt as your voice travels through his body. 

“Mmmm…Nngohh, fuck,” he curses with furrowed brows, biting his lip when sensing your tongue lick the underside of his cock. Fuck, your mouth felt so damn good — it took everything for Choso not to rut into your mouth voluntarily. Your tight throat didn’t make it any better, and the walls enveloping his entire girth had him drooling. 

Puffed cheeks suck on him leisurely, your lips coated from the saliva covering him, the noises so erotic and out of this world. You continue to massage his balls while your mouth occupies him, alternating with your hands to go down and suck on his balls roughly.

Here is where Choso finds it hard to contain himself with every second, his thighs jerking with every sign of pleasure, throwing his head back when his dick is back inside your gummy throat. Hips subtly propel to your mouth to create more friction, and he whimpers as you happily accept him with mumbled wails and restlessly jerk him off. 

“—Kahhnn, nnmgh, shit, Yn,” your name sounds like a dazed slur, the hand purchased on your head eggs you to go faster. He almost bites his tongue when yours teases his urethra for more of his precum, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum, I’m cumming…shiiit, ohh…!”

And you give him aid, sucking on his cock harder and bobbing frantically while you use both your hands to pleasure him more. The commotion of his lower half corrupts all of his senses, hanging by a thread to hang on and howl your name out. One last lap and harsh suck on his glans induces a choked groan, and Choso finally ejaculates into your mouth.

With the thirst pump, you instantly take him back inside your throat, drinking every bit of his load exuding from his throbbing member. He thrusts as you suck him, his orgasm shaking his being with every rut and sob. He heaves and pants, your name said in helpless prayers while you suck his soul out. And, God, does he fucking love it so.

You give him mercy and release his shaft, placing more tiny kisses on it while watching Choso’s quaking frame calm down. And when he does, you bring your body off from between his legs. “Thank you for saving me, Choso.” You crawl to place a gentle kiss on his lips with a hum, and then you relish the cute sounds he makes as your wet cunt meets his length. 

“Let me reward you by pampering you more...”

“….—op, don’t stare at him so hard!”

“Is that him?”

Choso snaps back to the present when he hears familiar voices speak — it is you and Nobara he finds that are looking at you from across the poolside. Nobara being the one staring dead at him; your best friend’s eyes feel like daggers piercing Choso’s pale skin. It made him gulp with nervousness.

Then, she cocks her head and leans to speak. “Doesn’t look so bad; don’t know about that mark on his face, though…How long was it, again?”

“Shhh, be quiet!” You slap her arm to silence her, making the mistake of looking at Choso. You two look into each other’s gazes for a few seconds, the warmth of your cheeks creeping up and having you two sever your faces elsewhere. 

Nobara saw the exchange, lifting a brow before asking you, “So, do you want me to give him your number, or would you like to fuck him again before that—Oww!!“ Another slap to her bare shoulder, she winces this time.

“Jesus Christ, shut up!”

@screampied 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

requests/thirsts are open hehe~ 🧸

© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are wholeheartedly appreciated ☆ dividers by @/benkeibear.

[littlexdeaths]

the car troubles saga comes to a close?

older brother’s best friend eddie x fem reader

the last installment of the car troubles saga for now… but you’ll definitely be seeing more of these two 🥰

it’s a recipe for disaster masterlist.

the sounds of grinding metal and loud rock music fill your ears as you step into sinclair’s auto repair shop.

the chatter among the shop is incessant as you look over the multiple cars until you find your 1979 chevy caprice parked amongst the rest.

but your heart leaps into your throat when you see a familiar pair of legs sticking out from underneath it.

“yo, munson! got a customer!”

you can hear his curse and the banging of a head, and you can’t help but giggle softly when he rolls out from underneath your car. he’s rubbing his dinged forehead, and in the process he accidentally swipes more grease across his skin.

but when his eyes find yours they soften, and he grins widely. once he returns to his feet, he’s wiping the remaining grease onto the rag that he shoves in the back pocket of his coveralls. it’s then that he takes you in fully, dressed in a pretty little sundress and sandals.

you’re a sight for sore eyes, that’s for sure. the weather is somehow even more sweltering than the day before, and the beads of sweat sticking to your skin almost sparkle in the bright lights of the garage.

“so, what’s the damage?” you ask teasingly once you reach him.

eddie just chuckles, hand hovering over the small of your back as he guides back towards your car. but the barely there touch has your heart racing.

“well, you had a faulty radiator cap, and were in desperate need of an oil change…. when was the last time you got one?”

you bite your lip, a feeling of embarrassment rushing through you. “uh, last fall… i think?”

his answering groan has you giggling again despite yourself, and eddie leans his hip against the hood of your car.

“now let me tell you what’s gonna happen,” he chuckles. “you’re gonna march that pretty little ass of yours in here six months from now to get that changed, got it?”

you nod, feeling a little flustered at the mention of your ass and pretty in the same sentence. and by his subtle smirk, he knows the effect he has on you.

“alright well, i’m all finished here. we can step in the office and discuss payment options, yeah?”

but as soon as that door closes behind you he has you pressed against it, palms on either side of your head as kisses you deeply.

“been thinking about you all night, sweetheart.” he groans, lips trailing over your jaw as you tug him closer by the collar of his coveralls.

“was half tempted to sneak in through your bedroom window like some horny teenager.” he laughs softly, reveling in the soft mewls that leave your lips.

“who’s to say i would’ve let you in?” you tease, earning you a small nip on your collarbone.

“you wouldn’t, huh?” he taunts, rough hands sliding up your thigh to the hem of your dress.

your breath catches in your throat as he hooks one of your legs up on his hip, and then his lips are back on yours. he smells like sweat and grease but something so distinctly eddie that it makes your head swim.

but a sudden knock on the glass window to your left has you pulling apart, heart thumping as eddie all but groans in annoyance.

“munson, got another car waiting out front. wrap it up.”

you’re thankful then that the blinds— while bent from frequent use, are shut. no need to give his coworkers a free show.

“be right out mr. sinclair,” eddie calls back, though his words are slightly muffled as he presses them to your throat.

another giggle spills past you as you tip his chin up, his brown eyes smoldering as they meet your own.

“you do this to with all your paying customers?” you say with mock offense.

eddie just rolls his eyes as steps back from you, but not before pressing one last searing kiss to your pouted lips.

“you didn’t think i was actually gonna charge you for that, right?”

[phasecornnuts]

I would love to power bottom Valentino from hazbin hotel ples 😏 also I LOVE angst so maybe a bit of that 😌 head cannons or a fic doesn’t matter I love words

Hello again whores! This is over 16k words…. I think I may have a problem, but I cooked so whatever

Tbh I may open writing commissions bc I love y’all but if I’m writing biblical epics I lowkey would appreciate being paid (college is expensive) 😭

CW: For general angst and Drug use

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You hated working nights, but working for Val always meant you worked nights. If someone were to ask you to write a list of everything you disliked about the club, you’d swear the exterminators would be here by the time you were done with it. But alas, it was what it was and there was nothing you could do to change it. That fucking contract made sure of that.

There were a few things that could make your shift bearable though. You liked Angel, even though he didn’t really come by anymore because of that stupid hotel, you liked the free drinks, even though Val made sure they were watered down after you vomited on a customer, and you liked the pills Val would give you, even though they made you feel loopy when you preformed. Those were the shit. Grade A. Top tier. Happiness in a tablet the size of your fingernail.

In your dressing room you watched the clock, five minutes. God, you were already sweating in the shitty outfit Val made you wear for tonight. A frilly maid outfit with black lingerie underneath, the man wanted a strip-tease and he was gonna have it one way or another. With Angel gone, you were the only other person he thought was worth headlining. That felt good to hear, even if you were only second choice. Maybe Angel being gone was a good thing, not for him but for you, maybe Val would see that you’re better than him, that you tried more. Maybe then you could be the star, and not just the understudy. Maybe, maybe, maybe; The word’s rhythm wavered in your head.

Hoping for Val to want you was fruitless though, you knew. Angel was the golden goose- or spider, you supposed - and it would take an act of god for someone to eclipse him. You took your eyes off the clock, knowing getting lost in your thoughts would just lead to a spiral of self-loathing. You closed your eyes and released a heavy sigh. On your table, beside your makeup and phone stood a fluorescent orange bottle. Unscrewing the cap you let loose three in your palm before capping the bottle. You ran the pad of your thumb over the tiny white buttons, smooth and chalky, before placing them in a row on your tongue, all washed down with watery gin. A twisted communion.

You lean back in your chair, wondering when the pills are gonna kick in. About two minutes pass before you hear the door to your dressing room open and a tired waitress with smudgy blue eyeliner and a crooked wig tilts her head towards the hallway to tell you it’s time for you to get on stage. Walking past her, you can smell a heavy peach scented perfume she used to try to cover the smell of sweat. Your heels clacked on the tile floor as you walked up to the entrance of the stage. You scratched your back from the itchy fabric of the costume, then adjusted the tops of your stockings. The song that’s currently playing ends and the performer before you walks to the back, they’re huffing and tired. They stretch and pop their back before looking at you, mouthing “Good luck.” The DJ of the club took a beat before announcing you to the crowd. Rolling your shoulders, you walked on stage feeling the hot spotlights shine on you.

That’s when it hits.

All of the tension you held in your body lifted, and your mind began to swim as you felt the Oxy kick in. Fuck, they really were the best. They made you feel warm and floaty, made the world seem bearable. You swung your hips seductively as you sauntered to the pole, ready to begin your act. Looking around, all the faces of the crowd blended together. It felt like the world was painted in watercolor, all of its harsh edges gone, replaced with washes that drifted out into nothing.

A chemical confidence kicked in then. Those languid movements of yours had everyone entranced, grinding your sex to the pole as you teased eager watchers with a peek up your skirt. Over the music you could hear their hoots and wolf-whistles, then frenzy when you began to shimmy off your top, exposing that black bra you had on under. You throw it out into the crowd, grateful not to have that polyester piece of shit on you anymore. The way they all clamor to catch it made you bite your bottom lip with a smirk. They were all so pathetic.

You spun on the ball of your foot, but the weightlessness of your opioid addled body worked against you, making you fall. Luckily you caught yourself on your hands, pretending it was some sultry move like a lady in a porno. The crawling was good though, you pretended to fuck the stage before you got to the center. You leaned back on your hands, stretching out a heeled foot that they all begged to touch. One almost did, before you snatched it away.

Slipping off that ugly skirt and kicking it off into the drunken crowd felt so good. They were transfixed, enthralled, however you wanted to put it. Your high made everything better, blanketing your body in comfort- That was always the peak. Savoring those small moments that made them scream. Looping and spinning and sliding and going upside down, stretching your legs out spread-eagle. When you felt the room start to spiral you stopped with your back to it for support. With a fake sexiness you slid your hand down your stomach, into those thin painties before taking it out.

God, it felt good to be desired even if it was like this. Sure, Val didn’t want you, but they did. All those sinners and hell-born who clamored to touch you and have you touch them. How they fought over an ugly, scratchy top because you wore it.

Turning your head you saw a wide-eyed patron ignoring a half-drank glass. You smirk and crawl towards them, and their eyes turn to the size of saucers. Reaching the edge of the stage you lean over, hanging over their small table. You opened your mouth wide enough to kiss- But you didn’t. You let your tongue hang out of your mouth, letting a fat drop of spit land in their drink. That was all they could have of you; You smile and go back to the stage to continue your act.

You don’t know how long he’d been standing there when you saw him. Valentino. He nips at his cigarette while he looks at you, not knowing what he’s thinking. Your moves become bigger, looser, hoping to impress him. A glob of phlegm sits at the back of your mouth and you swallow, feeling the tenseness grow inside your body. I can be good too, see! I’m as good as Angel! Even better! Please…please don’t fire me.

He walks closer to the stage as you keep grinding on the pole. Your eyes meet for a second before you look away, unsure. When he reaches the edge of the stage is when you slam yourself to the floor- the crowd hollered. Val adjusts his glasses and takes a long, long drag from his cigarette. Your body cranes towards him, head lowered in reverence while you studied his face. Val was always so hard to read, that’s the thing you hated most about him - well, at least one of them- was he displeased, impressed, disinterested? Fuck if you knew.

With one hand he pinched your face, between his pointer and thumb. He pressed his mouth to yours, filling it with all of that warm smoke. The roof of your mouth hurt so much, but the rest of your body trembled. He’d never been this open, kissing you, watching you dance, it felt so, so good to have his attention. Val pulled away, pink cloud leaving your parted lips.

Valentino leaned in, “Meet me in the back.”

“I still have five minutes left…”

“I’m your boss.” There was a vague sternness to his words, what were five minutes compared to his regard?

You breathed heavily. “Gimme a second.”

Quickly as you could you got off stage. Your head was spinning and you couldn’t tell why- was it the Oxy? The drink? The dancing? The cigarette? All of them combined. The backstage was full of cold air, making goosebumps prickle over your legs. You crossed your forearms and leaned them on the wall. Eyes closed, you counted backwards from 100; 100, 99, 98, 97- Val with his cigarette showed up in your mind, how he pulled your mouth to his, how you shivered, how you liked it. You tried again, but he kept lingering. Another restart, going a bit longer this time, but you gave up somewhere around 56.

Through the backstage hallway you walked to the back, The Velvet Rooms. Those fancy, gilded places hidden away that only those Val liked - or who could afford it- could enter. Valentino hid himself away in the biggest one, a room within the wall closed off with heavy dark blue curtains. The Velvet Rooms were where Overlords and certain Goetia came to be spat on, spanked, and other “peculiar wants” that Val catered to.

Opening the curtains you were struck with the heavy scent of his smoke. You closed them shut, the room illuminated by a faint pink light. Val sat on the couch, legs spread wide and arms slung over the top, his heavy coat thrown to some unknown corner. Seeing him reminded you of how little clothes you had on. Val’s second set of arms beckoned you over, you obeyed. He rested them on your waist, idly feeling the texture of your garter belt.

“Good of you to come carino,” He kissed your stomach, tittering at the way you quivered. “You did so good I had to meet with you privately.”

“How could I deny you Valcito?” You responded in a honeyed tone that made him chuckle.

“Valcito?” He smirked.

“Aren’t you?” You tilt his head up to see your smiling face, dressed with sultry bedroom eyes, “My little Valcito who liked my dancing.”

Val showed off that gold tooth of his; He kissed your stomach again, leaving a little red mark.

You dropped your hands to his arms, sliding up to his biceps. You bit your lip, so hard and toned. For so long you were curious about Val’s body, his sex, his libido. You wondered what he did to Angel to make him so sore and his voice so hoarse. It was embarrassing how many nights you spent thinking about what he tasted like- though now there was no point, you knew now, cigarettes and citrus vodka.

The tips of his fingers traced along your hips, fingering the thin strap of your panties. Your voice grew weak as he nipped again and again at the soft flesh of your stomach. Mind in a daze, words slipped out of your mouth.

“You know, I’m surprised you called me back here…” A kitten-lick across your navel that made you squirm.

“Why’s that Carino? Don’t think you’re pretty enough?” His voice teased.

“I thought you didn’t like women”

“Why would you think that?” He looped his finger around the hip strap again

“Angel.” He snickered.

“Oh Carino, don’t worry. Angel is just the soup D’Jour,” His finger dipped forward along your hip bone, “Men, women; Women, men; all of those sweet things in-between, how could you pick just one?”

“How poignant.” You said with a bit of a flat affect. His waxing-poetic seemed so unimpressive to you. Though, you felt a stab of guilt for thinking so.

“You, Sugar, I just can’t deny,” Val moved his hands up along your torso, stopping just underneath your breasts, “Good tits, nice stomach, pretty face,” his attention went back to your panties, “You coulda been on the cover of Hustler. Hhhnn, maybe I’ll make you the centerfold this month…”

You leaned over him, pressing your face to his. Fuck, his tongue felt so good in your mouth, making your stomach start to knot and squirm. He took your bottom lip between his teeth, making you whine before you pulled away. Placing tiny nips on his neck, you felt the heat in your stomach grow hotter and hotter and turn to slick. You wanted to touch him, feel him, consume him, and be consumed.

Val pulled away for a second, but it felt like forever. He reached into a shallow pocket and produced a button of something. It was a tiny tablet, waxy and fat, and pinched between his two fingers. You wondered what it was, it didn’t look like Oxy. You hoped it was something stronger, desiring the out of body experience you’d been losing since you started to grow tolerant of the opiate.

“You ever play a game of rolling roulette Sugar?” Val asked, you shook your head no.

“You trade the X tongue to tongue, and whoever’s it dissolves on is the lucky winner.” Oh so it was Ecstasy, now that’s good shit.

Val pulled you onto his lap, cupping a breast, “C’mon Baby, let’s go on a trip together…”

That’s all it took.

The tiny pill teetered between both of your tongues as you kissed, growing smaller and smaller and smaller. Val’s spit was thick and sweet and wonderful, something about it making your body go alight with electricity. The X melted so easy, like blue cotton candy; You could feel the serotonin swell in your brain like a party balloon.

When the first roll happened you moaned into Val’s mouth. All of your nerves were standing on edge, shivering with anticipation. He removed your bra, placing a nipple in his mouth as you felt his cock grow harder. It felt so much better than your other highs. The Oxy only ever calmed things, washed them out. The X was so different, so so much better. Everything seemed to shimmer, like the whole world was wrapped in cellophane. How could you think the absence of feeling was so wonderful when this existed?

Your mind was in a twinkly daze when you started to undress him. He kissed and licked at your neck while you felt your way through unbuttoning his top. Fuck, his skin was so smooth and warm; He pressed you closer, teeth bit into your collar bone before dragging his tongue over the marks he left.

You kissed your way down Val’s body. At his chest you lingered, leaving tiny red marks on the trail to his V-line. Valentino’s head lolled back on the couch as you unzipped his cock with all of its dark hair. You put it in your hand, running your thumb over the leaking tip. He swore under his breath as you pumped him slowly, up and down up and down.

The warmth of your tongue dragged along his thick shaft. Your stomach gets a sharp squirm to it, same as your cunt. It’s hard to tell because of the drugs or how sexy Val looks with his legs wide open and his cock needy for your touch. Looking up at him, you’ve never wanted anything more in your life.

His breath hitched when you took him in your mouth. Your tongue twists and swirls around his cock, savoring the feeling of him hitting the back of your throat, making you gag. To try to calm that darling pain between your legs you rubbed your thighs together, but that didn’t help. All it served to do was make your cunt needier. You push his member deeper and deeper into your mouth; You moan into his sex, making him squeeze the palmful of hair he had in his hand tighter.

“You’re so good, Carino.” He says, breathless. You start to suck him faster, blowing and kissing and licking. Val kept sprinkling compliments throughout. It felt so good to be praised by him; All of those sweet things he’d save for everyone else, but never you. You’re so good, you’re so sexy, you take me so well, you’re so pretty, you make me so hard.

“‘M close.” He grabs your hair again, pulling your face in. Feeling devious, you pulled away, savoring the flustered look on his face. Val is huffing, fucked out, and dazed out of his goddamn mind on X.

“You can stand to wait a little longer Valcito~” You nip at the inside of one of his thighs, making his voice hitch into a falsetto. You dragged the tips of your fingers up to his sensitive stomach, mouth leaving a hard bite outline near his ribs. Tracing him was so wonderful, feeling all of those hard edges give into softness. Nursing on his neck, your thumb and forefinger followed his neck muscle and collarbone, dipping into their crevices.

“Valcito~” Your breath was hot against his neck. He mumbled something under his breath and tried to slip his hand into your panties. You caught his wrist and pushed it away, biting hard on his collarbone. You can wait.

Again your mouth found its way south, the want in your cunt becoming more and more painful. You took him in your mouth again, your saliva getting thick and syrupy. Val seized the opportunity and shoved your head down on his cock, chasing the release you denied him. Your teeth grazed his member before pulling away again. Val whined, his eyes pleading. A dark smile grew on your face before you took him again.

He let out a sharp breath and pressed his hands onto your scalp. You went faster, letting the flat of your tongue trace the vein on the underside of his cock. It was fun playing with him like this, having a little control with him for once. Val’s hands tensed in your hair when he warned you he was going to cum.

When he came he wailed, filling your mouth with his salty taste. Looking up at him, you opened your mouth. Val’s thumb traced your bottom lip, admiring his work.

“You look so good like this, Carino.” He huffed.

Pushing yourself from your knees you kissed Val, his seed still in your mouth. That’s all that took to make him go feral. He pulled you to his lap and laid you down, wrapping your legs around him. Without taking his mouth off yours he took his top off, ramming into your needy sex.

Fuck, Val was bigger than you thought he was. His pace was hard and fast, making you scratch your nails into his back. Your kiss tasted like everything good in the world- cum and grapefruit and cigarettes and cotton candy and euphoria. Both of you swallowed, pulling your faces away to catch your breaths. God, you were so wet, Val’s cock slipped in and out of you so easily and it felt so goddamn good. Better than any finger or cock or toy and it made you squeeze him tighter.

You pressed your forehead to his neck, mumbling nonsense. “I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me.” Val spat on his fingers and slipped his hands between the two of you. You didn’t know what he was going to do until you felt his wet fingers graze your clit. He got rougher with it once he found it, making you squeal and cum on him.

That didn’t stop Val though, and god did it feel good. He kept fucking you through your release, making you cum another two times. Your legs felt like jelly, body weak and weightless. The X was releasing its last wave of chemical joy as he fucked you, pleasure rippling inside of you. He came inside you, making you sob into his neck. Val pressed you closer to him, whispering in your ear as you felt your release drip out of your cunt.

“You’re so good baby, so good and pretty.” Pleasepleasepleaseplease, say the magic words.

“I love you, you’re my perfect girl, my pretty baby.” You came again.

His thrusts got sloppier and you could tell he was gonna cum again. “Please, please, please, let me be your favorite, I’ll be good, I’ll be good, I’ll be good.” You whimpered.

The anticipation of an orgasm built up, shivering and needy. Val grazed your face and kissed you, “Oh you’re my favorite, baby. My little sullen girl~” He held you closer, savoring the way you squirmed when you came together.

When he was done he stayed inside you. Val pressed his head on the couch beneath you. You traced the scratches you left on his back, feeling your high from the X begin to ebb. Your breath felt so heavy and your mind so fuzzy. That all didn’t matter though, Val wanted you now. He’d been inside you, kissed you, felt you, squeezed you, and couldn’t get enough. He wanted you. So what if it was only for the moment, so what if this meant you could disappoint him, so what if you’re only a place-holder until someone better comes. You’re the favorite.

[octuscle]

I need help. This guy just walks up to me on the street and pricks my hand with a needle! He said something about me becoming a “real country boy”. The thing is, I live in the middle of the city. My friend said you could help.

Help? Yeah sure, but what exactly do you have in mind? Maybe you could sit in your smart EQ fortwo and take a look at the countryside. You seem a bit tense right now, some country air might do you good… You're struggling through inner-city traffic. The city can really suck. You're glad to be over the bridge. Slowly the air gets better. And the view is clearer. And the traffic less. Fuck, the tank is empty! You urgently need a gas station. Wait, the car is electric… Anyway, it says you need to refuel… You steer your little runabout with the last of your strength to the next gas pump. Shit, 33 gallons. Then there really wasn't a drop left in it.

You pay at the cash register in cash, credit cards are newfangled shit. And you take another coffee and a donut with you. The drive is still long. You love your Dodge RAM. Gliding down the country road in it is simply majestic. Of course, it's not made for the city. But then, neither are you. Remember when you thought you could be a veterinarian? You went to university. Far too many people in one place. You could only stand it for two semesters.

You just stop at the hardware store. You still need a few things. Old Pete is always happy to see you. And you always have time for a little chat. Life in the country is relaxed. Back in the car you take off your sweaty wifebeater. Although the sun is setting slowly, it is still very warm. You roll down the windows. The breeze cools your sweaty bare chest. You still have one customer, after which you can perhaps go down to the river and swim a bit. And with a little luck, Mikey will be there, too. You could use a little fun with his cock tonight…

The idea of dropping out of veterinary school and becoming a blacksmith in your village was the best idea of your life. You love horses, you love the people here. And you would always prefer good sex in the hayloft to slinging in the darkroom.

Hot guy with cap? Will probably be from @simonsx XD

[ronearoundblindly]

Threadbare (1)

Steve Rogers x Fashion Designer!Reader

Part One: Yield Strength (see series)

Summary: Steve gets to meet his favorite designer, and you get a surprise visitor at work.

Warnings: none. Maybe a bit of creepy behavior but not from Steve. Yes, I did just want to use the leather jacket gif for shiggles. What's it to ya? WC 3355

Steve Rogers hates stuffy functions. He hates the brown-nosing. He hates trying to convince people who have everything to give scraps to people with nothing. He hates watching the excess and indulgence, even when he knows it ends up giving something to those in need. He hates it. He hates the whole lot of these stupid, asinine—

Steve takes a breath and smooths his hand down the buttery fabric of a double-breasted jacket hanging next to his intended garment.

Ok, fine, he hates the functions, but he actually enjoys the dressing up part.

He didn’t used to. No. The only outfit outside of his Cap suit that ever truly fit him—before or after the serum—was his SSR uniform, and coming from a time of nothing, Steve accepted that as a huge win.

And then he woke up in this world of excess and—what do they call it? Fast-fashion?— realized that what should be easier to acquire was much, much harder to find: room to breathe.

Steve may roll his eyes at Tony’s custom everything, but he admits internally that at least Stark’s comfortable all the time. Steve would settle for being comfortable in his own skin.

This helps though, this gloriously draped, stiff in a supportive way, heavy in a grounding way, and shapely button down. He doesn’t need a whole suit tonight; it’s not that kind of event. In fact, Steve wasn’t specifically invited. He heard Tony talking about the new collection by the designer of this shirt—which happens to be the label for 90% of Steve’s dressier clothing at this point—and Steve outright volunteered himself to go with Tony.

See, Steve Rogers is now a big, broad guy, and it’s been an adjustment, as well as plain difficult, to gather a wardrobe that isn’t custom tailored due to his sheer size and proportions. The team jokes about his tight shirts, but if he buys things large enough for his shoulders, his waist swims in fabric. Steve had to live off of stretchy clothing for the first three years he was out of the ice. He wasn’t out of his Cap suit long enough for the investment to be worthwhile. Then it took another several years before he discovered Tovarich.

The man must know what it’s like to be big and broad, that’s for sure. Steve may not be much for high fashion, but he’s genuinely gotten so much comfort and enjoyment out of Mr. Tovarich’s work that Steve wants to thank him personally. For once, being Captain America is a good card to play to ensure he gets to meet the designer.

Steve adjusts his rolled sleeves a bit in the mirror, smirking at himself for being a bit of a dandy concerning his look right now, but he’s determined to have a good time out with Tony. It’s just a fashion show. How difficult can it be?

Really damn difficult, that’s what it is.

Steve isn’t prepared for the bizarre press interest in who is there instead of what is being shown. He’s used to cameras flashing at him—especially because the bright and loud pops of flashes were much worse in the ‘40s—but Steve’s in awe of the models’ complete indifference while walking a straight line with a straight face in some of the simplest, most magnificent men’s wear he’s ever seen.

If all he had to do was tick boxes on a list to order things, Steve would be in big trouble with a full bingo card and an empty wallet. It’d be worth it though.

Tony tries to talk to him every so often, but the music is outrageously loud. Steve can’t hear a thing.

He gets tapped on the shoulder by some women sitting behind him, and they try to say some more things he can’t hear.

Everyone rises to clap, and Steve joins in, overwhelmed by the fast pace of all the outfits on repeat, when the man on his other side accidentally elbows Steve and drops his program. The paper flutters to land in front of Tony’s feet, so Steve picks it up, hands it back, and the man makes an appreciative face before gesturing vaguely at the runway and mouthing his admiration. Steve nods and smiles, happy he’s not the only one fanboying over clothes.

The lights change in the venue. The photography and clapping stop. Tony starts yammering on about an after party, but Steve wants to meet the designer.

“Oh, Cap, that walk-and-wave was as close as you’re getting today. Tovarich is a hot commodity. I’ll just get you a fitting sometime.” He clamps a hand onto Steve’s shoulder and tilts his head toward the refreshments. “Shall we?”

Darn. Steve should have done more research on how fashion shows work, but he hates how invasive online snooping feels. It was fine when he was catching up on history and historical figures. However, most of the ‘news’ now is not news at all, so he avoids searching for information that way. He doesn’t ask question about Mr. Tovarich because, in theory, it’s none of Steve’s business and Steve may or may not be slightly ashamed at how obsessed he is with something as trivial as clothing.

Fashion is not something he thought about until very, very recently. The most time he’s spent worried about what he puts on is his tac suit, and the main features of that are being blade resistant and bullet proof. Those things don’t exactly interest him so much as they are in his best interest.

So Steve is rather disappointed by the outcome of the evening, but he’ll manage. For once, he’s got a tiny bright light of something to look forward to in the form of a few more dress shirts and a very sharp vest.

He goes on with life as usual.

Months later and they’re doing this thing.

It’s called the Hellfire Gala, and apparently, it’s a big, big deal. Steve’s told everyone goes all out, that he’ll need to be dressed to the nines, and he realizes this is his opportunity.

Tony’s elated to make the arrangements for him with the Tovarich Atélier and plans to go with him. He wouldn’t stop grumbling about how awkward Steve might be, raving that he can’t have Steve getting a bad rap under his clout, so Steve shows up nervous.

Tony sends a text saying he’s running late. Of course he is, today of all days.

Steve shuts his eyes and lowers his head in gratitude that there are only two seamstresses when he first arrives. The ladies—one older and one younger—offer refreshments and ask a few questions about the event and what styles he might be interested in. He explains the getup needs to highlight the ‘Cap’ persona since the gala is a celebration of their work as Avengers, but other than that, it’s the-sky’s-the-limit for Tovarich.

The younger seamstress smiles at that and calls it ‘fun.’

Sure. That’s one word for it. Steve would also call it daunting.

As instructed, he stands on a small platform while the ladies bustle about speaking quietly to each other. Steve hears Tony ring the reception bell before any measurements have started, and he heaves out a sigh of relief.

“In time for the good stuff, am I?” Stark winks.

“Always perfectly welcome, Mr. Stark,” you, the younger woman, say politely. “Would you care for anything to drink?”

“Uh,” Tony smooths his hand down his current suit front, eyes flickering to Steve, “have you met me?”

Your smile widens. “Dominica, please,” you signal to your coworker.

Between your fingers, you’ve folded a scrap of paper, something you scribbled while Steve stood awkwardly on the pedestal (which isn’t to say he has stopped standing awkwardly), and Tony snatches the paper from your grasp, unfolding it to make a challenging, inquisitive face.

Steve huffs and glares, praying his friend doesn’t start hitting on Tovarich’s employee before the man even shows up. Steve isn’t the one to be worried about.

Stark takes Dominica’s proffered tumbler of brown liquor, saying nothing.

You are a ninja with the tape measure, gentle hands sliding over his chest and waist and—Steve swallows—his hips, all while rattling off numbers…which no one writes down. Steve moves his arms and legs when told. When you’re kneeling on the edge of the platform, eye level with his crotch, Steve decides to distract himself and get some answers.

“I’ve been looking forward to my first meeting with Mr. Tovarich. When might he arrive?”

Tony clears his throat, wincing. “Not possible, buddy.”

Steve tenses.

“I thought that—“

“You can’t meet him for the the first time.” Tony holds up a hand before Steve can move. “You already did. She’s measuring the distance between your balls and the floor.”

Steve startles out a ‘what,’ snapping his legs shut with your hand between his thighs.

“Captain Steve Rogers, please meet your favorite designer,” Tony beams, shoving his tongue against the inside of his cheek and hiking up his eyebrows.

Steve shrinks, face burning.

“Hello, Captain Rogers,” you introduce yourself with a lovely smile, “I will…need my hand to make your suit, sir.”

His open-mouthed impression of a fish is cut short by standing at attention, releasing the seal of his thighs. “Yes, ma’am. Sorry.”

“Very polite,” you mutter before turning to Tony. “Mr. Stark, was that entirely necessary?”

“For the look alone, yes. My god, I’ll pay you again just to watch now that he knows.”

You push off the platform and practically skip over to Tony, reading over his shoulder. “How did I do?”

Tony looks at the piece of paper. “Damn it. Spot on,” Tony grunts.

“And that means…?”

“That I leave you alone for the rest of the consult,” Tony whines. “Fine, but make it worth it, buddy. Lady gets paid by the hour.” He snaps his fingers playfully. “Dominica, let’s take room two, my dear.”

Steve’s not sure what to do with his hands and mistakenly remains up high on the pedestal while you pull out a notebook and sit at a small table.

“Oh!” You look up at him with tender, lively eyes. “You may step down now.”

He feet seem to thunder to the floor even against the carpet. “I didn’t mean to—I just assumed that—I’m sorry, Misses—”

“It’s Miss,” you correct him. “And don’t worry. You are not the first, and you won’t be the last. Have a seat, Captain.”

“Steve.”

“Steve,” you correct yourself this time. “I’ll tell you a secret. I prefer that most people assume a man runs this business. You get to see people’s true colors when they finally find out.”

That doesn’t help Steve’s hot flush of embarrassment.

“You are one of the good ones. I can tell,” you add, adjusting to a fresh page in the notebook and marking the top corner.

In the silence Steve asks, “so you already knew my size?”

“You aren’t so different from my standard cut.”

“No,” he allows. Of course, he should have known that seeing as everything he buys from your label fits him so well. He kicks himself internally while trying not to frown at his slip up. It is, however, easy to keep a smile while basking in the glow of yours.

You pop your shoulder up into a shrug, lips morphing into a wry tease. “And I’m pretty good at what I do.”

Amazing, Steve thinks to himself. You’re amazing…at what you do.

Your elbow rests against the table, hand cupping your jaw as you hold Steve’s gaze.

“Some even call me a master of the male form.”

His swallow is deafening, which only makes you happier, and he looks down at his knee, rubbing his pant leg while his face heats.

“But for today’s purposes—“ you lean back in your chair, twirling your pencil playfully, a magic wand in your brilliant hands “—why don’t you tell me what makes me your favorite designer so I can make you my favorite client?”

Why’d you have to be so pretty? Why do you need him for so few fittings?

Steve has to stop himself from spending a Tony Stark-sized fortune on clothing for the pleasure of walking into your store and seeing you alone—well, in the hope of seeing you at all. Dominica is very sweet, sassy in a hard ass mom kind of way, and she’s one of four total assistants you have at the shop. Steve’s met three of them.

There’s just only one of you, and you’re busy.

Between his duties with the Avengers, actually sleeping, and debating with himself about what constitutes looking desperate, Steve is lucky to have caught you in-house only half the times he visits.

And then he tore a shirt. In fact, he tore three shirts, and to his credit, two of them were by accident. The third…uh, there’s a chance that when Steve exclaimed “oh shoot, I didn’t see that nail poking out” that he 100% saw that nail and deliberately brushed himself against that wall. He also may or may not have deliberately done it in front of Tony, faking that it was no big deal, because now he has the excuse that Tony is the one who told him to go see you.

Yeah, Steve agrees, if you say so.

He’s all excitement and nerves again when he rounds the corner of your street, but then the adrenaline shoots through Steve’s veins for a different reason.

A squad car has jumped the curb in front of your shop, lights flashing, doors left open, and Steve can hear lots of tense voices.

It’s a stressful enough day without the uninvited guest. Not many people—who know how you work and are not assholes—would dare to show up within a month of the Spring Show, without an appointment, and demand a rush job.

A rush job on a custom suit that you explicitly said could not be rushed before its scheduled time, mind you, but the surprise visitor doesn’t care.

Richard Fisk is broad. He has dirty blond hair that falls in front of his eyes when he tilts his head to smile. He often travels with a whole team of other imposing men.

The son of Wilson ‘Kingpin’ Fisk, however, is a prime example of personality souring good looks. Where it’s bashful and adorable that Steve Rogers hides his smile, Richard barely bridles his menacing entitlement.

You hate him, but he’s not a person you can outright refuse. He makes all of your assistants uncomfortable. Fisk is needlessly hostile to Tarik, who is thankfully not here today; he’s a creepy dick to Abby, who you insist stays in the fitting room with Anja, your longtime client who trusts you to push the envelope tastefully for a redheaded woman in her sixties; and he almost made Jules quit because he couldn’t follow instructions during a consult. Dominica stands in as the perfect buffer when she’s here, but the eldest of the Tovarich Atélier employees is currently on the other side of the city for a VIP delivery.

Your busy, busy day just got much harder.

His trio of beefy entourage flanks Fisk at the front of your shop.

“Here for my suit, sugar,” he drawls, flicking his used toothpick into a corner on the floor.

He eyes Abby as she shuts herself and Anja away from his direct ire, and although this leaves you alone, it stops your worry for their safety in addition to your own.

“As it stipulates in the commission, we take at least—“

“Those little hands are free now, I see,” he spits, stepping within an few inches of your face. His breath is foul and hot.

The aggression has you stumbling back, smashing into a side table and knocking a box of supplies to the ground.

“How ‘bout you get to work.”

You take in a heavy, fortifying, and quiet gasp. “Per your order, the fabric is manufactured off-site because teal is not a standard color. It takes time to produce. This was made very clear when you signed.”

Fisk flashes that menacing smile. “We can wait. One of these fine men can…keep you focused till you do your job.”

The condescending tone and disrespect of your work ethic spark flames of rage in your gut. Even though terror still simmers beneath, it’s too easy to let an insult fly.

“You’re lucky I’m even making it. The all white one last summer was a stretch, but teal? On you? Not something you can pull off.”

He lunges forward again. “Keep up the cheek, and I’ll lock you in my basement until I get everything I—“

“Ma’am,” a cop bursts through the shop door, “we got a call…” The officer goes quiet after one look at Fisk.

Abby must have phoned after hearing you knock supplies down, and you’re grateful, yes, but police are of little help with this guy. Cops wouldn’t dare ruffle Kingpin’s feathers or his awful son’s by proxy, but if you roll over now, you’ll never get back out from under him.

The only way forward is to put your foot down.

“Mr. Fisk, I wouldn’t make you a black and white striped three-piece if you did chain me in a basement. You’re a spring, and I have standards.”

“Ma’am,” the officer warns, his partner standing nervously in the open doorway.

“What kind of professional would I be if I let you walk around looking like a mental asylum inmate? I’m doing you a favor!”

Richard brandishes another toothpick. “The customer is always right, sugar.”

It’s stupid. You know it’s stupid to taunt him and yell. Being insulted and diminished doesn’t make you want to be smart though; it makes you want to be right.

Your hands ball into fists of fear and rage. “It’s my name on the label,” you bark, “and I could just refund you to get you the hell out!”

Now you’ve really done it.

The boy gangster’s face twists and his oral fixation goes limp in disbelief. No one talks to Richard Fisk that way, least of all women.

His men step between both the cops and their boss, leaving Fisk himself to grab a solid wood tie box from the nearest counter and fling it at your face.

Your arms fly up to block it, but nothing ever connects, nor is there a crash behind you.

An officer’s voice wavers from across the room. “Uh, I’m sure this can all be worked out. No need to…start anything.”

You’re ashamed to say that your hands are shaking when they return to your sides and reveal an entirely different bulky blond.

Steve Rogers casually holds the caught box in his hands, staring daggers as he shifts squarely in front of you to block Fisk.

“This doesn’t concern you, Captain,” the bully grunts. “Piss off.”

Steve strides forward to replace the box neatly and plants himself inches from Fisk’s face.

“Can’t do that. She’s expecting me.” He turns back to you. “Ready?” Steve asks with a tight smile.

You swallow down one iota of your alarm and clear your throat.

“Yes—” the word cracks but you hope familiarity will scare off Fisk for now “—thank you, Steve.”

That seems to be Captain America’s cue to handle everyone else at odds in the storefront. By the time you get control of your trembling limbs, Steve has shown Fisk the door and promised the officers that you’ll be looked after.

Abby peeks out of the fitting room, surprised to see only Steve.

“Did they send you instead?”

She opens the door wider for Anja to see.

The redhead quirks an eyebrow. “Call the police more often, honey. They’ve upped their game.”

The now bashful, broad blond tilts his head, rogue hair falling across his face. His blue eyes sparkle beneath long lashes while he apologizes for lying, but you can’t for the life of you figure out why he’d feel guilty.

“I…” Steve stumbles. “I don’t have an appointment. I just wanted to see you.”

Currently estimating four parts to this grumbling into the ether but who knows. I clearly cannot be trusted to estimate length anymore...

[Next Part]

You can find more to read on my Main Masterlist! For readers under 18, please see the Light Masterlist which contains all-age-friendly works.

@supraveng @patzammit @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @femefetalelevelingup @darsynia

[yeonjunszn]

ASAP! — TWENTY

PAIRING! mark lee x f!reader

SUMMARY! you’re not exactly the best barista at zhong coffee, but for some unknown reason (his massive crush on you), mark thinks you can do no wrong. sick and tired of his favoritism and your lack thereof due to absolute obliviousness, your coworkers are determined to fix this problem. asap.

MORE! 🙀🙀🙀 LEE JENO WTF IS WRONG WITH U (i’m sorry for making u a bad person my sugarplum i love u but ur a milf lover so it worked for plot’s sake)

◠‿◠ ‿◠ ‿◠ ‿◠ ‿◠

As if your day couldn't get any worse, just earlier you were taunted by Jeno in front of multiple customers (Mommy of the Month and her little posse of soccer moms) for not knowing how to steam milk properly. Leave it to Mr. I Love Milfs to make you feel small in front of, well, said Milfs.

And now, as you huff in front of an older male customer, he yells at you for not knowing the difference between a Wet Cap and a Dry Cap. Was there even a difference? You don’t even drink cappuccinos.

"You know, that's what I hate about young ladies like you, taking job opportunities away from men like me. You're so stupid, you can't tell the difference between these two cappuccinos? They're different in weight and taste. Are you tasteless? Blind? Maybe both? How do you even work in a coffee shop?"

As the man goes on criticizing you, you can't help but feel the tears well up in your eyes and start dripping down your face. Yet another problem over the stupid milk. Drip, drip, drip. It takes only a few tears to fall down your face for the customer to start getting angrier.

"Oh, look. The idiot girl is crying. Get me your manager, I need to talk to him about lousy, useless girls like you."

Renjun, who just happened to hear the last part of the customer's sentence, whips out his phone under the bar to text Mark. He knows he can't deal with this customer alone, not when you're damn near shivering like you went for a swim in the middle of December.

It’s not long before Renjun steps into your way as Mark grabs your hand, pulling you away from the customer. He laces your fingers together as he guides you towards his office, making sure it's empty as he sits you down in a chair.

"Are you okay?" Mark asks, eyes filled with concern and heart aching for you.

You shake your head at him, not wanting to speak out of fear that your voice will quiver much like your body is right now.

"Y/N... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have had you switch your usual shifts," Mark comments. He kneels down before you, thumb brushing across your puffy cheeks to stop your tears. "I would have never done it if I had known you were going to be treated like this. I know you’re used to the usual mid shift customers."

Mark’s other hand pats the top of your head comfortingly as you sniffle, finally speaking, "No, I... I promised you I would help. I just didn't know Jeno was so mean sometimes. And that old guys were capable of yelling at me like that."

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I'll talk to Jeno and I'll switch you back to your mids with Jaemin and Yangyang," Mark sighs. He looks for any hint of upset in your eyes, but instead he gets a faraway look. Like there's something not quite there. "Do you want a hug to make you feel better?"

You nod your head slowly and Mark stands up, pulling you into his chest. His arms wrap around your waist as he begins to rock the two of you back and forth, swaying and humming to an imaginary tune.

After a while, you pull away and look up at Mark with a pout and hopeful eyes, "Mark?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think I'm a bad barista?" you ask.

"Well, I think you weren't as good as the other baristas before, but you are getting better," he replies, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. If his hand had lingered for any longer, he would have been able to feel the heat pooling in your cheeks.

"Okay... Um, do you think I'm stupid?"

"No. It's practically impossible to tell those two cappuccinos apart unless you’ve been a barista for a really long time. That guy was just an asshole. If he ever comes back here, I'll beat his ass to a pulp," Mark answers you truthfully. He speaks clearly; he wants you to think highly of yourself and not listen to the words of some arrogant customer. A part of you believes him, taking his words to heart.

"One more thing..." you mutter, pushing yourself back into his chest and hiding your face.

"Mm?"

"Can I... can I have your chocolate croissant?" you ask, hesitation in your voice.

Mark bursts out into laughter at your silly question, his entire body vibrating as he holds you tight. "Is that it?"

"Yeah."

"Of course, Y/N. You can have whatever you want," Mark says. "Are you feeling a bit better now?"

"Yes. Thank you," you murmur, looking at his face — more specifically, his eyebrows. Something in you makes you a tiny bit shy, not able to look into his eyes as he smiles at you.

"Any time."

There's a racing in your chest, where your heart is, one that's never really been there before. Whatever it is, you hope that it will calm itself. Quickly.

TWENTY — chocolate croissant

PREV! nineteen — i will force his hand into a blender

NEXT! twenty one — #xiaojun_out

MASTERLIST!

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TAGLIST! @stardusthyuck @erin-calling @tddyhyck @bigheadchen @choiwonder @neozon3nha @sunflowerbebe07 @kissesfrmwonwoo @miyawwn @sserafimez @haechansbbg @lilyidk03 @mowchiie @jaemsrina @jeongintwt @shwizhies

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AFK Journey review by a beta tester

AFK Journey came out yesterday and I see it getting quite a lot of attention so I figured I'd at least put this out there so that people don't go into it expecting something it's not.

I have been in the testing of this game and continued to provide feedback all the way from the alpha test back in the fall of 2021 and through all the beta testing that started in April or May last year. I have also been aiding in making lore-focused streams about AFK Arena for over a year and seeing as AFK Journey is supposed to be set in the same world, this will be relevant later. I have also been contracted to make officially-backed videos about AFK journey – a deal I left for a number of reasons, not least of all the reasons I have for writing this post. Now with credentials out of the way, let's get to the actual review.

The visuals take your breath away

Let's start with something positive – this game is gorgeous. Farlight Studios have outdone themselves yet again and after the vibrant and futuristic world of Dislyte, their take on Esperia is surprisingly tame, in a good way. The colors are soft and lovely, the models look amazing, and the customization screen of the main character is awesome! The characters look great and move in a smooth fluid fashion. Ult animations, idle animations, and the overall feel of the characters as well as the skins added into the game thus far are all nice and fit into the wider world well, not to mention look wonderful and clean, a lot of effort and skill went into making them. Sadly, if we ignore the skins and ult animations, this has been the case since the alpha without any major changes.

Gameplay could be improved upon

I will be up-front about this, I don't care about gameplay all that much. However, I have to say, the game is not open-world, despite claiming to be so. If you venture off the paths, you get stuck on fences, stuck on bushes, stuck on rocks, or just prevented by an invisible wall. There is no swimming, no climbing, no gliding, or most other things we came to associate with open-world games. The vertical gameplay is a plus to be sure and you get to pick characters to follow you around without having to use them in battles which makes the exploration more fun. The overworld puzzles are creative and fun too! The real issue comes with... everything else. At the start, fights in the overworld are easy. However, they will scale up way faster than you can level and you will soon be adding an additional roadblock to the list: enemies. The combat itself is creative but requires attention as the autoplay function is usually wonky at best and outright damaging to your party at worst. AFK Journey is not living up to its AFK title either. One thing I found really annoying was the story progression not being tied to the AFK rewards. You have to grind a separate set of battles to increase the AFK rewards you receive. The AFK rewards and story also still cap each other so you won't be able to progress in one without progressing in the other.

Outside of the main story, the game offers multiple game modes. If you don't enjoy PvP, be warned that the game puts great emphasis on doing your PvP arena every day and being good at it if you want to build any good characters. The game also has a labyrinth mode which tracks your health across multiple battles and allows you to gain upgrades as you go. This mode is somewhere between AFK Arena's and Dislyte's in terms of fun. It is more varied than AFK Arena's which makes it more fun and less repetitive, however, you have a limited number of characters you can bring in which severely limits how varied your gameplay experience might be. It was also recently nerfed to the ground and now poses little to no challenge. Honor Duel is another PvP mode in which you buy upgrades and then fight randomly generated players with supposedly the same level of upgrades as you. If you can claim eight victories before three losses, you win the run. However, the factions and characters are currently so imbalanced that depending on your luck, you may not win a single battle in a run or you might breeze through all of them without any effort.

The gacha element is pretty much non-existent. If you scrounge up enough resources to pull, you likely won't get anything much. You'll be relying on hand-outs of pulls and PvP shops to build your characters. AFK Journey should not be called a gacha game. It is, at best, a game with rare gacha elements.

Co-op is a lie

While AFK Journey does have a cooperative mode, in the form of connected guild dungeons, it is not really what it advertises to be either. All your guildmates can separately whale on some enemies together and depending on how you do, you will receive rewards that are generous compared to what the rest of the game offers. You can lend your friends your characters but they'll be the ones fighting with them, not you. The most social aspect of the game is seeing other players around the map and spending your friend points to buy different animations to perform at each other. The chat function is also pretty bad, though not as terrible as it is in AFK Arena.

The guilds and friends to add also don't work cross-server. So if you have a friend on another server, you won't be able to see them or talk to them or enjoy even the limited interactions that are actually in the game.

The story is disappointing at best and nobody knows the world

You may have noticed I've been avoiding talking about the story of a story-focused game. This is where the biggest disappointment lies. Let me preface this by saying, the story didn't always use to be this way. It used to be actually really really good back in the alpha and even at the start of the beta. However, in the last three months, the game underwent five or six complete rewrites of the main story, each worse than the last. As things stand right now, there is no nuance in protagonists or villains, there is a literal diarrhea conversation (like an actual conversation, several scenes long) for no reason, most of the story could be summarized on one page and the rest is pointless bickering that makes every other character utterly unlikable. The main character is an amnesiac going by the title of "Magister Merlin" despite the fact that Merlin from Arthurian myths, whom this is clearly based on, is an existing character in the world of Esperia.

In terms of lore, AFK Journey is not even close to what it promised. It promised to be a game set in the world of AFK Arena – a world with surprisingly rich and interesting lore that has been built up over the years. Unfortunately, it is very much not that. Not only are important world events treated as nonexistent, not only does the writing erase character relationships and dynamics, but the writers couldn't have even been bothered to learn the basics of the world they're working with. Factions get swapped around randomly for no reason, and important factional politics have been flipped on their heads. An organization that is supposed to be an outcast is now the ruling class, the timeline is all over the place, and even the names of things are not only inconsistent with AFK Arena but also inconsistent with Journey's world itself. The loading screen already breaks the world by telling you magic didn't exist until the "Fall of the gods" which is supposed to have happened recently, yet the entire time you will be running around ruins of magical civilizations from ages long past.

Speaking of the gods, there are characters who straight-up don't know what a celestial is. If you know anything about Esperia's lore, you know how important religion is to its history and how jealously the gods guard their authority. The thought of someone having completely no idea of what they were is strange, to say the least. The game also invents new gods instead of using preexisting ones with the same function and even disregards events relating to the gods that changed the course of Esperian history – such as the death of Esperia's primary goddess Dura. In fact, AFK Journey doesn't even consider Dura important enough to have a model. Once again, this is the primary goddess of this world. As for the characters brought over from AFK Arena, they have been butchered beyond recognition. The warlord of an entire country who slew countless enemies is now a pacifist whose only interest lies in spicy food, a hard-working girl who, for the sake of her family, developed her skills until she was recognized by the stars and became the fulfillment of a prophecy is now an angry Mary-sue who was always perfect and didn't actually need to work for anything – and gets offended if you suggest otherwise, the list goes on.

The sound design is refreshingly good – for the most part

As a game with voices, we have to talk about those first. The voices, for the most part, are alright. None of them really stands out as particularly amazing, though I do like a few of them more than the others. I like Fay's voice quite a bit. Sadly, none of the characters from AFK Arena is voiced by the same person anymore, and in most cases, it is a massive downgrade. And that isn't talking about the worst offender of all – Valen, one of the main characters you'll have to listen to the whole time. Valen used to have a voice that fit his character – suave and kind of bold and full of life. Now he sounds like he's still going through puberty, and he's a whiny crybaby at that.

The sound design outside of the voice acting is great. Once again, this is a very strong point for the game. The music and background noises are great and even the menu sounds are not disruptive in the least. If anything, they feel natural to the world.

PC client could as well not exist at all

This is coming from second-hand knowledge as I have played AFK Journey on phone but so far the reviews I've seen appear to be as follows: Game lags when walking, freezes when trying to talk to NPCs, and is prone to crashing. Mobile devices perform better for AFK Journey than PCs do.

The mystery of translation

Back in January, the only publicly admitted localizer has been fired from the project. About a week and a half ago (around 10 days before the game's launch), the official Discord posted an application form looking for translators for the game. Apparently, the game has several translations already out at this moment, but none of them particularly good. Some are even so bad it's sort of funny. In a really... pathetic sad way. It probably doesn't help that they're still looking for translators as we speak.

In conclusion...

I wish I could recommend AFK Journey, I really do. I've been excited about this game ever since its announcement and I've been providing as much feedback as I could throughout both alpha and beta. The organization has been awful and the game suffers for it. Internal changes happened a few months back and since then, everything about the game just fell apart. Even things that were good before got ruined and now all that remains is pretty visuals and nice music with nothing else worth paying attention to. It is a major letdown when it could've been incredible. The game is nothing it was advertised as – it is not an open-world game, it is not a gacha, and it is most certainly not set in the world of AFK Arena.

I hope the people who decide to play it can still find some fun in it regardless.

[oogaboogasphincter]

Make My Wish Come True | Joel Miller x f!reader

a hidden crush, a secret admirer and a blind date for a present? talk about a love flurry for your christmas forecast! your best friend joel miller might know more than he’s letting on. 

word count/rating/warnings - 6600+ // MATURE 18+ ONLY: jackson era!joel, friends to lovers (more like idiots to lovers lol), swearing, food and eating mention, one gun mention, very little talk about infected, bodies, etc., tommy, maria and ellie mentions/appearances, lots of anxiety talk but the good kind, everyone is painfully sarcastic in tlou ‘verse, kissing, choking mention, allusions to sex

a/n - @laureliciousdefinition​ is my wonderful giftee for the @pedrostories​ secret santa event! i had soooo much fun writing this and truly got carried away haha, i've never written something this complex. this was also my first time writing joel, i hope i did him justice <3 and i hope i fulfilled your wish lauren! 💕 i left the ending sort of open so the audience can take creative liberty as to what happens next, but i have no qualms against writing a spicy part two hehe 🤭

“A blind date? Really, Tommy?”

It’s early in the afternoon on Christmas Day. Outside your quaint little house in Jackson, the sun - chopped into severe angles from the distant Teton mountain peaks - shines bright against the snow banks. Black-capped chickadee songs float through the crisp air, chirps and mews from elk echo across the great planes of frozen land that comprise your new home - and Tommy is standing across from you in your living room, dumping an unexpected and unwelcome present on you on the cheerful day.

“Come on, practically the whole town’s pitched in to bring it together!” He would’ve never made it as a salesman in the pre-outbreak world. Relying solely on weak persuasion and guilting the customer? A pink slip would’ve found its way into his hands within the first week.

“Even Joel chipped in?” you ask incredulously. Joel’s been your best friend since your first day in Jackson. After being dragged to the town pub by none other than Tommy in an effort to acclimate you to the community, you spotted Joel as soon as you walked in; stood in the corner, keeping to himself. The soft smile hidden under his thick facial hair told you he found alone time pleasant, but when it grew to twice its size when you introduced yourself, you vowed to never come unstuck from his side like velcro. 

You knew your best friend - Joel loved you, but he would never approve of setting you up like this. You can’t really put your finger on any specific reasoning as to why, you just know in your gut he wouldn’t. 

“Yes,” his younger brother states bluntly. Tommy was never good at lying either.

“Look, it’ll be fun! We made it all nice for ya, you don’t have to worry about anything besides being... approachable,” he looks at you with a playful accusatory glint in his eyes. One reason you and Joel get along so great is because you’re two of the few - if not only - people in Jackson that don’t focus on finding love; Well, at least you don’t express it outwardly. Since forming your close bond with the old grump, you’ve wondered to yourself numerous times how deep what you two have swims into those blurry lines that separate platonic and romantic relationships. You definitely haven’t gotten lost in your thoughts day after day pondering how far you want your relationship with Joel to go either. Nope, sleepless nights imagining what it would be like to stand up on your tiptoes during one of his tight hugs, leaning up and finally planting a kiss on his lips couldn’t be more unfamiliar to you.

“We all gotta get wrangled up at some point. Hey - it might be your secret admirer! At least this way we can start to narrow down the options,” he attempts to convince you again, and this time he’s a little more successful than before. For the past few weeks there’s been someone in town vying for your heart. You’ve come back from patrols to find warm servings of food on your back porch. You’ve been awoken from your sleep by gentle melodies coming from outside, down on the street and drifting up to your bedroom. Most recently you set out for the stables for your scheduled patrol only to be stopped by a plate of chocolate crinkle cookies at your feet, and turned away from your horse as someone had volunteered to cover your shift.

“I don’t know. They seem like a ghost, I doubt they’d admit it to my fave if they’re already putting all this effort into being sneaky,” you reason.

The food and treats that have been left on your doorstep are served on no identifiable dishware, left without a note. The musician plays under the cloak of darkness, choosing to not use their voice and let their acoustic instrument do the talking. All this covert attention would have spooked you, but after having Joel taste test the food to make sure no one was trying to poison you, you began to see the romance in it. You grew relieved to find dinner already made for you when you tiredly slugged back to your house, optimistic to hear what lullaby you would fall asleep to that night. And you would never turn down getting excused from patrol.

“Well, you got me there...” Tommy sighs. Ever the matchmaker, he’s irritated this stealthy admirer has been able to sneak around right under his nose anonymously. He can’t officially pair you up with John Doe.

“Your date’s already at the cabin,” he circles back, not letting you get out of the measly slab of romance he was able to piece together.

“What?!”

“I came from his house. I knew if I came to you first you’d up and vanish into the mountains by the time I told him about it.”

You groan exaggeratedly, annoyed at his accurate prediction. Being around Joel so much, Tommy learned too much about you for your liking sometimes.

You’re not ungrateful for this surprise, in fact you find it really cute and thoughtful. But it’s just not you. With Joel, and this secret admirer - you can barely sort your feelings out for your own sake, let alone for anyone else involved! And now there might be a third interest in the mix, thanks Tommy. 

“So you rudely sprang this on him just like you’re doing to me?” you say with your arms crossed. Who is this other poor soul that’s been ensnared in this trap?

“That’s kind of a weird way to say ���I’ll go on this date, Tommy’, but yes,” he tilts his nose in the air, far too proud of bugging not one, but two people today.

“I don’t want to do this, just so you know,” you grumble, staring him down, trying to get him to crack. But the longer you glare, the more giddy his stature becomes, his smile widening until his teeth show maliciously.

You crumble in defeat, “Where is this? You said something about a cabin?”

He claps his hands together, enthusiastic to explain, “Yeah, it ain’t the lodge. It ain’t really a cabin neither, just sounds better than an old withered shed we found tucked away in a corner of the woods,” he finishes with a laugh.

“Sounds lovely,” raising your eyebrows in mocking bewilderment. You’re now sort of excited to seize this new opportunity, but will hide your feelings from Tommy if it’s the last thing you do.

“Hey, we dressed it up for you two sons of bitches. Just take the main trail east, follow the stream for a bit, until you get to that great big aspen with the gash in its trunk. Take a left where the trail divides there and follow it for a bit. Ellie will show you the rest of the way.”

Your jaw drops, “Ellie’s in on this?! Oh, when I see her-”

“When you see her you’ll politely follow her, is what you’ll do,” Tommy chides. You can take momentary despise on her all you want, and though Ellie was glad to be a part of this scheme, the man in front of you holds most of the blame; it was his original idea.

“Fine,” you surrender. You guess he really did recruit other people from town to orchestrate this plot.

With all your might you ignore the bemused sounds coming from Tommy as you lace your boots up and shrug on your jacket, grabbing your keys and going to the door. He follows behind you on your way out and chirps, “What, you’re not gonna take any gifts? Try to lube him up?”

Your face scrunches, “First of all, gross way to say that. And second, hell no. Me being there should be plenty.”

“’Atta girl,” he pats you on the shoulder.

Once you’re both out, you lock your door, then turn on your heel and look at him directly in the eyes so he knows you’re not messing around, “I’m going to get Maria to smack you for me for this.”

To your demise he huffs out a laugh, pluming into a white cloud in the frigid air, “Oh, she’s looking forward to this just as much as I am.”

“Screw you both!” you yell over your shoulder, jokingly. As you trudge through the snowy streets to get to the stables and begin your journey to your objectionable present, you don’t look back when Tommy bids you an annoyingly joyous farewell, “Merry Christmas!”

-🎄-

Earlier

"Tommy, I can't do this," Joel accosts his perpetually-meddling younger brother.

The Miller brothers, Maria, Ellie and yourself had gathered at Joel's house this Christmas morning to exchange presents, and upon seeing his brother lingering as everyone said their goodbyes, Joel suspected Tommy was going to let some cat out of a bag. Never in a million years, given how close the brothers have been for their entire lives, would Joel think Tommy would have the gall to suggest a blind date, let alone "gift" one to him.

"Joel, we both know you've taken on much more terrifying things with a brave face. Talking to the woman you love is what gets your tail tucked between your legs?" Tommy nags his eternal bachelor of a brother, watching Joel's scarred hands clutch and release the neck of his guitar with an anxious, cyclical grip. As far as he was concerned, he was doing Joel a favor by planting you two in the middle of nowhere, alone, granting him romantic pretext to work with.

"Like you weren't shaking in your cowboy boots when you started talking to Maria," Joel fires back. Tommy was irritatingly correct, but Joel wasn't going to take the full charge when they were guilty of the same crime.

"I never said I wasn't. That's just a part of love, Joel, you know that. What happened to the casanova that could charm the pants off about the whole population of Texas?"

Joels scoffs loudly, rolling his eyes. Sure, he allowed flirtation to bud and sometimes blossom if he was lucky, when the world wasn't falling apart at the seams, but he wasn't that good. He just had gotten more action than Tommy, something the younger brother refused to acknowledge for what it was. Besides, Joel was never too focused on love; it was nice when it was there, but not as important as other aspects of life: family, for one. However, he's seriously considering rearranging his priorities given Tommy's current behavior.

"That was a long time ago," Joel reasons, truthfully, "This is... different. She's different." He struggles with his words, scrambled by adoration overtaking his heart, and he's fully hypnotized when your face comes into his mind. Your breathtaking eyes that he just wants to fall into; your cute nose whose tip gets frigid in the wintery air that he wants to kiss warm; your soft cheeks he wants to cup with his rough hands and marvel at the difference in texture; and your lips, oh, your lips.....

"Goddamn, you really are in love," Tommy jests, receiving a halfhearted glare from underneath Joel's lashes as he leans his guitar against his couch and crosses his arms over his chest, broadened with an odd mixture of pride and insecurity. Proud of his loving commitment to you, nervous that his true feelings are being perceived by others for the first time after what feels like decades of being a statue.

Okay, it's 99% nerves - he's just trying to seem like the same-old unyielding Joel and doesn't know what to do with his hands so he shoves them under his armpits.

"You're not helping," he cocks an eyebrow at Tommy.

"Alright, alright, just- I was going to say be yourself but that's horrible advice given..." Tommy gestures to Joel's stiff form, earning another hardened stare.

"Okay!" Tommy stands from his chair, putting his hands up in surrender. Dear lord, if convincing Joel is this hard, how much of a fight will you put up? He restarts, "What can go wrong? You'll get there before her; I came to you first because I figured I'd do you a favor by letting you set your stuff up, obsessively run through your conversations in your head, get a lay of the land - you know, you and your anxiety and all that."

"Thank you, Tommy," Joel guesses it's a sweet gesture given the troublesome context, "But..." he trails off, stress still coursing through his veins. There are so many unknowns...

"There'll be overlapping patrols the whole time you're there so no having to fight off infected, you got your six string, your coffee and cookies, it'll only be the two of you...?" Tommy looks at Joel expectantly, waiting for the lines of his face to turn up in hope. But Joel's eyes keep to the box of extra chocolate crinkles he watched you taste on your way to the stables a few days ago, unknowing of the second surprise of pardoned work he had arranged for you.

Tommy attempts again, putting a diverting inflection in his voice, "We tried to make it cozy."

Joel can't help the smile that cracks across his face, growing wider as he imagines what you would be thinking if you were in the room right now, "We're not the romantic type."

Tommy counters with a pointed, sarcastic attack, "Who are you talking about? The man who quite literally serenaded his woman in the moonlight and the woman who near broke down in tears of joy over it the next day at breakfast, or some other heartless souls?"

"Would you stop being smart and listen to me?" Joel's patience has run out. He wants to do this, so badly wants to admit to you his infatuation and present his heart on a silver platter for your taking - but there's some undercurrent of trepidation he can't seem to shake.

Tommy's heart sinks as he watches his brother's arms unfold to hang between his legs, gaze lowering to his boots, dejected. Even if Joel can't go on the date, Tommy won't stop trying to help him navigate these feelings, now that he's gotten lucky enough to have caught them, "You worried she won't reciprocate?"

Joel contemplates the gentle question, taking a few moments to make sure he's got everything straight in his head, "I'm afraid she'll think differently of me when she finds out I'm the one who's been doing all this nonsense," he waves his hand unceremoniously in the air, referring to his secret admirer antics.

"It ain't nonsense. And you've seen her face when she finds your little presents; she loves 'em."

It's true. Joel's caught you humming while doing your work around town the tunes he's played for you under the starry night sky, seared into his brain the picture of you giddy with delight at both the idea and flavor of the food he's left after he "taste tested" it - did you really think he would eat, or let you even think about eating, something a stranger made in the world you live in now?

"Do you think she won't love you back?" Tommy drops the final question. Potent, but essential in answering.

Joel knew maybe you didn't love him in a romantic way. But confidently he knew from the way you sought out his company every single day, the way you hugged him a little tighter when he would leave or just get back from patrols, the way you looked at him... you loved him dearly.

"She already loves me."

"Then what're you afraid of?"

-🎄-

Present

Joel paces the rickety floorboards of the battered shed, restlessly awaiting your arrival. It probably has only been a few minutes since he got here, but his mind has written, doubled back, erased some, rewritten and ran through enough possible conversations with you to last eons. After fatefully agreeing to Tommy's blind date scheme, Joel traced the path his brother directed him to take and was greeted with what seemed to be nothing but a mountain of snow and densely packed aspens. Only by rounding the giant snow drift was the "cabin" revealed, and oh what an improper name. Joel smirked at the poor state of the structure, but observed his brother's logic for choosing it - it was virtually undetectable.

The door took a few well-muscled pulls to open, and after completing an initial sweep to make sure no bandits had discovered this perfect hideout, Joel shook his head at the decor. Bundles of mistletoe line every inch of the miraculously sturdy ceiling beams, making almost the entirety of the singular room a kiss zone. There is a red and green plaid couch in the center, which Joel thought would look atrocious in any other setting, but looks sort of pleasantly festive against the stripped wood interior. Its upholstery has noticeable signs of age, the colors faded to muted maroon and evergreen, but other than that it looks decent - spectacularly holding no stains of carnage after all these years.

As Joel wondered how it survived, he took in the few candles placed around the room, a matchbook sitting next to each one. With the "cabin" (that name will never not be funny) battered by the wind and snow, some of the paneling has warped, leaving microscopic seams to the outside. The winds blustered so fierce, the frost snuck through these cracks, creating an icebox. Joel went around and lit the candles, taking delight in the complementary scents; must've been Maria.

As pinecone and lime, peppermint bark and red velvet began to drift through the air and warm the cabin up - maybe the flames are a placebo effect because Joel is still shivering his balls off - he arranged the items he's brought. He set his guitar up against the arm of the couch, his box of cookies on one of the cushions, his thermos tucked away into his bicep like a stress ball. And then he was faced with the insurmountable, maddening, parasitic task of waiting. He paces back and forth past the door, ears pricked for any semblance of noise disturbance coming from outside. Nothing but howling wind so far, once in a while the pittering of snowflakes adding to the encapsulating drift trick him into thinking he hears hooves, hooves carrying you. But no, so he goes back to pacing.

He makes himself dizzy, sprinting through possibilities of what might happen. He plants his feet steady, hands balancing himself over the back of the couch, trying to fight his nausea. He pins the blame on the sickeningly sweet smell of the candles, but even for his stomach's sake he can't convince himself of something that stupid. You've seen her a million times, he reasons, what's so different this time? You're her best friend, she loves you, she doesn't know, you don't have to follow through with the plan if you don't want to, just pretend like this is all some ridiculous joke. She doesn't know. She doesn't know. She. Doesn't. Know.

Instead of calming himself down, he makes his heart ache more. He's been lying to you. Going behind your back, slinking around unbeknownst to you, fibbing right to your cute little face as you look up at him with all the trust in the world. He puts his fist to his mouth and clutches his stomach with the other, trying to slow his body and take some deep breaths. His efforts are for naught when he hears Ellie's voice carried in the wind.

"Shit," he gasps to himself, pressing his ear to the door to listen.

"You'll never guess! Have fun!"

"Okay, thanks, stay safe!" your cheerful lilt swirls in his heart like the snowflakes outside. Oh no.

He heaves through his teeth, putting his gloved hand to his forehead. It slips from the amount of perspiration, so he takes his gloves off, followed by his winter coat. He lays both on the back of the couch, deciding to keep his flannel sleeves rolled down so you don't notice his tacky skin. Now he wishes he were cold, as this doesn't help one bit. He pats his face dry, replaying Ellie's words: you'll never guess what?

He'll think about it later. Maybe. He doesn't know. He smooths his shirt, closes his eyes and breathes as evenly as he possibly can while he hears your boots crunching closer and closer to the door. Just say hi, he instructs himself, just say hi.

It takes you a few shoves to open the door too. Joel would help, but he can't move from where his feet are cemented to the floor. After you get it cracked, the barrel of a gun peeks inside, followed by your searching eyes. You had the same idea of bandits as he did.

When your wary eyes meet Joel's, all caution melts into disbelief. What the fuck is this, Tommy? you think.

Your best friend sighs, a little haggardly you notice, before he greets you, "Well, well, well."

You put your weapon away in your coat, stepping inside and closing the door to this definitely-not-a-cabin. You smirk at Joel, but heightening candle flames guide your attention up to the ceiling, where bundles of mistletoe are hung. You sneer, "He isn't very subtle, is he?"

Joel clicks his tongue, "Nope. And I bet that was indeed a Tommy touch."

"So you were fed the same blind date story that I was?" you walk around the room, taking in the rest of the place. It surely lives up to the picture that Tommy painted for you, but it isn't so bad. Not when you're here with Joel.

"Yep," Joel looks down at his boots, scratching the back of his neck, a nervous tic of his you've come to find sort of endearing. But why is he nervous?

Please don't notice I'm nervous, he stops as soon as he realizes the hint he's giving you.

"They really couldn't just get you some more sandpaper, or carving tools? Or me some peace and quiet?" you ponder, turning back to him. It's not that this seems all that horrible now, but more like a lot of effort for minimal payoff. This is what had Tommy, Maria and Ellie so doubled over in giggles?

"It looks like we got plenty of that here," Joel smiles at you, tight-lipped, but it stirs up warmth in your belly nonetheless. He's right - wicks sizzling and snow dancing are the only sounds you hear. You mirror his expression, and try to relax a little in hopes he'll become less tense. Maybe he's cold? Why'd he take his jacket off, it's cold as fuck in here.

His chest puffs with a breath before he speaks, "Since we already came all the way out here, we might as well make the most of it."

Your smile builds, reaching your chilly cheeks, "Okay."

Okay, this might actually be the best Christmas gift ever. All alone in the forest, for whatever length of time you want, with nothing to focus on other than Joel? You have to think of a way to thank Tommy without giving him any more ideas.

"I missed you anyways," you go to give him a hug, desperate to bury your face in his strong pectorals, but his hands reach for your coat on your shoulders before you can step into an embrace.

You turn around, letting him slide it off you as you coo over your shoulder, "Ooh, how chivalrous."

He hums, amused, wanting to keep his hands on you, pulsing your muscles between his palms, rubbing your cold skin back to warm, chasing away shivering aches from your bones. To your dismay he doesn't, but you two never shy away from getting cuddly, especially recently due to the season. Maybe you can get cozy on the couch.

"Make yourself at home," Joel gestures to the piece of furniture, which now that you're taking a closer look at it, you see how old it seems to be. You'd cuddle with Joel outside on the frozen ground if you had to, so this plaid relic won't be an issue.

"Thanks," you chuckle, taking a seat. Only two cushions, that means we'll be closer to each other, nice!

"I brewed some of the coffee you gave me this mornin', you want some?" he asks, uncapping his thermos. Your Christmas gift to him was a bag of whole coffee beans from his favorite coffee shop chain he used to frequent. Ever since you had your first coffee conversation with him years ago, he continuously cites that when you grind them fresh it's "so much better". You tease him for the line all the time, but it's one of the many quirks of his that you find irresistibly adorable.

"No, it's your present, not mine!" you remind him. Although his offer was a monumental one; Joel is territorial over and protective of his coffee like a grizzly bear. So much so, you're the only member of such an exclusive club, after Ellie tried a sip and proceeded to spit it out.

"Have you tried it yet?" you ask, watching his careful hands fill the cap. No steam rises from the surface - iced, just how you like it. You try not to get mesmerized by the way his long fingers grip the makeshift cup, bounding off into your fantasy land where those same fingers are wrapped around your own, your quivering thighs, your neck...

His timbre knocks you out of your trance as he comes over and takes the seat next to you, "No, but-"

Everything happens at once: Joel sits down on the couch; there's a bizarre cracking sound that fills the room; the two of you share a worrisome glance; you both go tumbling back as the sofa's legs give way. With the couch now sitting on its back, your legs are in the air and you're staring at the mistletoed ceiling. Laughter strikes through you like lightning and only gets more thunderous when you look over at Joel, blinking slowly, trying to avoid getting spilt coffee in his eyes. His grin grows exponentially, as do his uncontrollable cackles ruminating from deep in his chest, while he lies in place, literally soaking in the experience.

"Goddamnit," he grunts through a smile, setting his empty cup down.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" you lean over him, having difficulty seeing him through the tears squeezing out of your eyes.

"Yeah," his tongue darts out and licks his drenched mustache, "Mmm, good roast, thank you."

"You're welcome," you guffaw, pulling your shirt sleeve taut over your hand, your lip between your teeth and patting the liquid off his face - thank heavens he wasn't in the mood for hot today. Your sleeve will dry in time, much like his shirt will have to do too. You're violently struck with the thought of him taking it off, putting his hairy chest on display for you to ogle at in the romantic candlelight. You hope he can't feel the aroused heat radiating from your cheeks by how close you are as you finish cleaning him up.

Just kiss her, Joel's brain yells at himself while his eyes rake over your beautifully concentrated face, take the opportunity while it's inches away from your reach.

He can't do that to you though, spring something so brash on you out of nowhere. He's not Tommy.

In no time you right the couch together, sitting with your backs against one arm each, legs stretched out and intertwined, weighting it to the floor. Joel pours himself a refill, putting on a show of being overly cautious, which makes you giggle.

"At least I'll smell good," he grumbles up at you from under his lashes. You wish you could appreciate his joke more, but his saturated shirt clinging to his muscles is tormenting your sanity...

"You always smell good," you spit out without your brain's permission. You hurriedly pivot, trying to quash the minute uptick of his brows, "Um, so how have you been? Patrols easy?"

Good, that's a regular, sane question, you congratulate yourself. You haven't seen him for more than a few minutes at a time for the better part of a week, both your duties ramping up as the entire town wanted to have everything taken care of and then some for the holidays.

"Yeah, for the most part. Clickers are like most pests, they retreat when it gets too cold. It's the bandits that get desperate, lookin' for shelter, that you gotta watch out for. I don't want to jinx it but there's only been two individuals that we came across, died of natural causes. Nothin' to worry about."

Throughout his speech he's been running the tip of his finger around the rim of his cup, embarrassed that you're staring. If only he knew.

"How've you been, my little busy bee baker?"

His nickname engorges your heart, pumping praise through your veins. The part you fixate on is "my". You're his.

"On my feet. Thankfully I've only been baking like crazy, someone's been picking up my patrols for me."

"Oh?" Joel puts his best acting mask on. If he could steel through your unintended interrogations before, he can evade you for just a little bit longer.

"Yeah, I get to the stables on my scheduled days and they tell me to go back home, that someone's volunteered to take over my shifts. I wish I knew who they were so I could thank them, I wouldn't have been able to make all of my cookies without their help." Your Christmas present to everyone was personal boxes of homemade cookies. Crafting cookie boxes was one of your favorite things to do before the outbreak, so you thought you'd spread some nostalgic holiday cheer this year.

"Well I'm sure they got their due compensation by way of some of the extras you left over at the church hall."

He was a good boy - he only ate what was in his box and left the extras for the town. He really needs to get that lemon cookie recipe from you though, or better yet, truly indulge himself and ask you to come over and bake them yourself - it wouldn't be a complete lie if he told you he wouldn't be able to make them the same; he can't tell a teaspoon from a tablespoon.

"I hope so."

You and Joel sit and chat for a while, exchanging pleasantries about the weather, anecdotes about your days; topics that sound like they're utilized as a pillow for awkward conversation, but your energy flows gracefully with Joel's, like always.

Bringing it up again like it's the joke you know it to be, unaware of the effect it has on Joel's heart rate, you inquire, "So what were your tactics to seduce your date?"

He pauses for a moment, passing it off as a shared laugh with you and not a dive into an anxiety-riddled black hole before answering, "Reel her in with my natural charm, of course."

"Of course," you nod.

"Maybe crack some jokes, you know, because I'm a funny guy."

"Hilarious. Did you take a look at one of Ellie's joke books?" Joel had told you about the first of her findings, now she has amassed quite an impressive collection.

"No."

"Ugh, talk about missed opportunity! There are some good ones in there."

"Well I figured I wanted my lady to fall in love with me, not the book, so I'd tell them from the heart," he looks directly into your eyes, not wanting to give you any inclination that he might be harboring some unseen lovestruck magma beneath his rocky exterior.

"Oh, how romantic!" you tease.

"And then I brought this," he fishes his guitar from behind himself, stretching back with a groan, "Figured I could strum a song or two and see how she'd like it."

At the incredibly rare occurrence - thank you but still fuck you Tommy - you leap, "I'm your arranged audience, lemme hear!"

Joel sets the guitar in his lap, picking a familiar tune from the chords before he can stop himself. As the notes gather into a song, you come to anticipate the next strums, guessing correctly every time. You've heard this before, but where.... And then you remember. The night where it was so fucking cold you pitied your Romeo who was buried somewhere in the snow beneath your window, braving the temperatures to lull you asleep. What a weird coincidence.

It is a festive song that was immensely popular pre-outbreak, so it's not as strange of a fluke as you first thought. You sit and stare, admiring Joel's fingers dancing, his eyes glued to the instrument to watch what he's doing. You both know he could play blind, but thankfully you breeze over this extraneous, damning piece of evidence, for if you were to look in his eyes, you would see the admirer within.

Fading out, he pats the body with a concluding thump, "Do you think I would've swept her off her feet?"

You shrug, not keen to feed another Miller's ego today, "Maybe, if you had sung."

"Nah, that's reserved for at least date five."

"Ohhh okay," you chuckle. Not a romantic my ass, Joel.

He turns the tables, "What were your plans to woo your partner?"

"Um... well I wasn't going to put much effort in because... I-I already have feelings for someone in particular, and I figured he would never agree to something like this," you stammer, honestly, staring at the certain someone in question.

Confidence is injected back into Joel's face on a bright wave of intrigue, "You've got a crush?! And didn't tell me, your best friend?"

He sits up straight, eyes wide and mouth agape in a smile, messing with you, "Your reaction is exactly why I didn't tell you, dork."

"So you weren't even going to try with them? Oof, that's cold," he playfully scolds you.

"Looks who's talking, Mister Iceberg."

He ends his taunting at that. You certainly aren't wrong.

A few comfortably quiet moments pass, then you shiver with a laugh, "I actually am cold."

His beard scrunches in a smile, favoring his jacket to yours and tucking it over your shoulders, running a hand over your bicep once, twice, before reluctantly retracting it to his lap. You wish you could steal it; you'd bite past the tough material and sleep with it if it meant you could snuggle into his residual heat, the worn-in scent of fir sap, wood shavings, black coffee.

He whacks the primal, possessive urge inside him down like a mole, his blood stirring just looking at you in his clothes. He'll dream of you dressed both in more of them and less of them tonight.

The candles in the room have burned a substantial amount of their wax, the sun still shining bright but from a narrower angle behind the clouds continuously dropping snow. Maintaining the front that you're angry at Tommy for this is going to be near impossible to accomplish. You can already see yourself wishing on the stars next year for this very same gift.

Okay, maybe with a more comfortable sitting arrangement. While the tumble was funny and allowed you to get close to Joel, your back is killing you. You can't imagine what Joel's must feel like right now. Later tonight, when you've returned to town and after having dinner with him and Ellie, you'll direct him to lay down on his bed - like after any other intense patrol - and work the knots out of his spine.

"I'm happy we're here," you blurt. Suppressing your delight is useless.

Joel relieves some of the pressure in his heart, "Me too."

Goddamn that drawl brings you to your knees. Sure, it makes your stomach fill with butterflies every time he opens his mouth, but sometimes it mercilessly shoves you onto your back. You rally yourself and press forward boldly, "I'm happy you're here."

His expression doesn't move, sending a shallow ripple of alarm through you. He  seems a bit off, usually he gives you a smile or something.

Holy fuck, his brain shouts, holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck.

"I, um, brought some cookies too," he chokes out. He's about to reveal his big, stinking secret, and while it won't be quite verbal, that somehow makes it ten times more anxiety-inducing. Clawing talons of fear in his throat tempt him to take you by the shoulders and just scream 'I love you!'

Shit, you thought. Was what I said really that bad? You helplessly try to stick the bandaid back on the wound while Joel is preparing to rip it off.

"Wow, you were really going all out," you reference all the stops he had planned for his hypothetical date. Lucky son of a bitch.

"Yeah," he shrugs, trying to keep the tin steady in his clammy hands, "Would you like one?"

"Sure. Are they mine and you were going to pawn them off as yours?"

Your cute joke goes right over Joel's head as he pries the lid off, swallowing thickly and holding it aside so you can reach in and grab a chocolate crinkle. Never would he think of a cookie being sadistic, but his disconcerted soul is claiming otherwise.

Like the shattered powdered sugar coating, your conviction cracks. No way this is a coincidence.

You look up to Joel to find his side profile suspended in worry. You feel the gears in your head turn and he swears he hears them moving at a frightening speed, "Di-did you make these?"

"Mmhm," his throat is tight. He's made of marble, holding the tin open, unmoving. He knows you know and you know he knows you know.

A handful of silent beats pass, regrettably dangling him in suspense, but you're completely dumbfounded, "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I- I was afraid. Still am," he puts lamely in his opinion, bravely in yours.

"Don't be," you assure gently, placing a hand on his rigid forearm. Like an ax, you snap him free of immobility, pushing the incriminating tin away.

He layers his hand over yours, rubbing his thumb across your knuckles and back again, calming himself more so than you, "You know me, you know I have a hard time expressing my... emotions."

He snarls the last word like having a heart that beats is something to be ashamed of. You do know him, and flirtatiously retort, "Sure didn't seem like you had a hard time expressing them outside my bedroom window at midnight, sneaking around my house in the morning, rigging the patrol schedule behind my back..."

Your welcoming smile spreads to his face, "Why are you always right?" he grumbles.

"I have to balance you out somehow if we're a couple. Opposites attract, right?" you lean in, flicking your eyes from his hazel puddles to his mouth and back again. He reads the unmistakable cue and meets you, pressing his lips softly to yours.

On the second kiss, he molds his mouth to yours firmly, allowing a moan to reverberate up his throat. You sound one back as he pulls you forward, situating one thigh outside each of his so you're straddling his lap. Wrapping your arms around his neck and his around your waist, you lose all concept of time, your mouths dancing infinitely... before Joel abruptly breaks you apart.

"Hang on."

"What?" you pant.

"We ain't under any mistletoe," he muses, scooting you off the couch to directly under a bundle. Brushing your hair away to reveal your face, he gazes up at you in awe, his body finally at peace - but not for long, when you break out into a smile and him a sweat.

"You really are a funny guy, Joel Miller," you tease against his parted lips, feeling his confirmation vibrate your tongue as you go in for another kiss,

"Hilarious."

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