#‘why can’t you like girls or something’ CUZ MIDDLE AGED MEN ARE ATTRACTIVE

[mydotguy]

engie is undeniably a cutie

[country-clubs-gf]

Embry Call Imagine for kpopgirlbtssvt

In which Bella’s younger sister moves back to Forks and Embry imprints on her, and when he tells her he’s a werewolf and that he imprinted on her, she doesn’t freak out like he thought she would.

~~~

Excitement.

That was all I felt once I’d made up my mind to move back to Forks with my dad and my sister. It wasn’t an easy decision- I’d be leaving all my friends and my mother, and my university that I’d worked so hard to get into. All of it.

But I was so ready to move back to Forks. I was so fed up with Florida, which is surprising because when my mom told me we were moving there, I was so excited. I loved Florida, the beaches, the heat, everything. It was the opposite of Forks.

But that’s just the thing. It was the opposite of home.

As the taxi drove me from the airport, everything felt so familiar. The gray skies, the green trees, the mountains. I loved it. This is what I came back for. The familiarity of it all.

As the taxi pulled into my driveway, I was hit with an overwhelming sense of relief. I was finally here. Home.

I got out and grabbing my bags, rushing to the door so I could finally see my dad, Charlie. I’d been dying to see him, calling him every chance I could get while I was away.

He opened the door before I could knock on it. “Y/N!” Come here and give your old man a hug,” he greeted. I dropped my bags and wrapped my arms around him, taking in his familiar scent.

I opened my eyes to see a woman I soon recognized to be Sue Clearwater standing behind him. She smiled widely at me.

I pulled away from Dad’s hug and he moved over so Sue could say hi.

“Sue, is that you?! I haven’t seen you in ages!” I exclaimed. She moved closer to hug me and I returned the hug.

“Long time, no see!” She said. “How have you been?”

I sighed, moving my shoulders up and down for emphasis. “Super busy! I was so ready to get back home and feel like myself again!” I explained.

“Well we are so glad you’re back! Charlie’s been talking nonstop about how excited he is that you’re moving back in!” She states and I over at my dad who I can tell is mentally facepalming himself.

“You didn’t have to reveal all that, Sue,” he sighs. I chuckle and look at Sue, who is smiling and shaking her head.

“Well let’s get you unpacked!” Sue exclaims and both her and Charlie help me with my bags.

“Let’s!” I exclaim, more than ready to be settled in.

After I unpack and at least attempt to situate my belongings, I start to head downstairs but stop when I pass by a familiar room. Bella’s room.

It seems so empty. I then realize I have no idea where she is, as neither Charlie or Sue have mentioned her whereabouts to me. With that, I head downstairs to where Charlie and Sue are sitting cozy on the couch.

“Hey, dad, quick question- where is Bella??” I ask, a concerned look on my face.

“Oh,” he starts, looking down, “she went to go live with that weird Cullen kid.” I raise my eyebrow. “I can show you if you want. Apparently her and Edward have an adopted niece now. I’m sure you’ll want to meet her.” Charlie says.

“Yes, I’ve missed her so of course I wanna see her.” I tell him. He nods and sighs, getting up from the couch like it’s the hardest thing he’s had to do. I roll my eyes at his overdramatic actions while Sue just chuckles.

“Grab your coat and let’s go,” Charlie says. I grab my coat from upstairs and meet Charlie in the car.

The drive there is very quiet, almost too quiet. I can’t help but wonder what is going through Charlie’s mind and what could’ve happened to Bella to make him so reluctant to go see her and her new family.

We pull up to a big house in the middle of the woods. “We’re here,” Charlie announces. I quickly get out of the car and go up the steps, Sue and Charlie following behind me. I knock on the glass door, quickly being greeted by a pale woman with medium-length brown hair and golden eyes.

She opens the door, welcoming me with a warm smile. “Hi, I’m Esme.”

“Hi, I’m (Y/N). Is Bella here?” I ask.

“She is, come on in!” She opens the door wider for us to come in. “Good to see you Charlie.” She says to my dad.

“You too, Esme,” he says. She leads us up the steps into a big, well-decorated living space. I look around, only to find Bella and Edward sitting on the couch, a little girl with a striking resemblance to Bella is playing the piano. A blonde woman and bulky man are leaning against it, watching her. A blonde man comes up to Esme and kisses her sweetly, smiling lovingly at her after he does so.

Bella looks surprised to see me. “(Y/N)! What are you doing here!?” She asks excitedly, rushing up to me and hugging me.

“I’m moving back home!” I tell her, hugging her back.

Growing up, Bella and I were always super close. She looked after me and I definitely wouldn’t be who I am today without her. She’s always had my back, even when I wanted to move with Mom to Florida.

“You guys, this is my little sister I’ve told you guys about. (Y/N), this is Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper!” She points to everyone as she names them and they all give a half smile.

“Well it’s certainly nice to meet the little sister that Bella is always telling us about,” Carlisle states.

“It’s nice to meet all of you, too.” I tell them.

“Oh, and this is our niece, Renesmee,” she says, gesturing for the little girl to come over here. She obliges and walks up to me.

I bend down to see her. “Nice to meet you, I guess that makes me your aunt, too,” I tell her. She gives a small smile and nods, not saying much. She seems shy.

Suddenly, a very attractive guy with tan skin and dark hair styled in a quiff walks in the room. I eye the tattoo on his upper arm. I halfway recognize him but have a hard time putting my finger on who it is.

“Jacob, you remember (Y/N), don’t you?” Bella asks him. Jacob? It couldn’t be the Jake that Bella and I used to be friends with growing up when we’d come visit Charlie.

“(Y/N)? Wow, you’ve really grown up!” Jacob exclaims.

“I could say the same about you!” I gesture to his tallness, to which he laughs.

Just then, we hear a whistle coming from outside. Bella heads downstairs to see who it is, and I follow. She opens the front door and steps out, apparently recognizing the three boys coming up to the house from the woods.

I step outside, curious to see who these guys are. They all look sort of similar, and they all have that same tattoo that Jacob has. What’s up with that?

“What are you guys doing here?” Bella says to the tallest one.

“We’ve come for Jake,” he states with a really deep voice.

“What’s wrong, Sam?” Jake asks, stepping towards the men.

The two men beside Sam are much hotter than him. One has hair up in a quiff like Jacob, a strong jawline and cheekbones and thin lips. He’s stunningly gorgeous. The one on the other side of Sam has longer hair and fuller lips, he’s honestly adorable and a different kind of beautiful. I find myself instantly attracted to him in a way I can’t really describe.

I think I stared for a little too long cuz he notices and makes eye contact with me. Just then something unexplainable happens. The boy takes a step back, like he was hit by a gust of wind or something, his eyes grow wide and he looks like he got his breath knocked out of him. I look at the other guys beside him and they look just as shocked.

“Please don’t tell me you did what I think you just did, Embry!” Bella yells at him, obviously furious. She leaps off the steps and pushes him. “I didn’t want her to know this side of our world! I wanted her to have a normal life but that’s not happening now is it?” She yells.

What the heck is going on?

“Bella, calm down,” Jake warns.

“I’m sorry, i-it’s not something I can control!” Embry defends himself.

“Paul, get Embry out of here!” Sam demands.

“No! I’m not leaving her!” Embry shouts. What? Leaving who?

“Can someone please tell me what’s going on?” I ask. They all look at me, but no one says a thing.

“Do you want to tell her or should I?” Embry says to Bella.

“I guess you should. I still don’t fully understand your wolf stuff,” Bella says.

“Well before you do all that, Jake, we need you at Emily’s.” Sam states firmly. Jake sighs.

“Alright alright, I’m coming,” Jake huffs. “I barely even got to see Ness.”

Paul rolls his eyes. “I’m sure you’ll live,” he says, rolling his eyes. Jake shoots him a glare.

“I don’t know about that,” Jake retorts, earning another eye roll from Paul.

“(Y/N), get on Jake’s motorcycle. You’re coming with us,” Sam orders. Who does he think he is?

“Why?” I question.

“Just get on, trust me, it’s easier this way,” Jake says.

I look behind me to find my dad. I totally forgot I came here with him.

“Is it okay if I go with them?” I ask. He nods.

“I trust Jacob, go ahead,” he states. Wow, I wasn’t expecting him to be so chill with me running off with a bunch of hot guys.

I hop on Jake’s bike and put on the helmet he hands me. “Oh da wolf comin up” he says, starting his bike. I wrap my arms around his body, holding on for dear life. I can’t help but notice how warm he is, like unnaturally warm.

“Are you running a fever?” I yell over the sound of his bike.

“Something like that,” he answers. That doesn’t answer my question at all. If anything, it creates more.

After a long ride to the reservation, we stop at a house that is also in the middle of the woods. Except this one is smaller and actually sort of cuter.

“Wait, how did the other guys get here so fast?” I question. In fact, I don’t remember them getting into a car or anything, just running off into the woods.

“You ask a lot of questions,” Jake replies.

“Yeah, and you’ve answered none of them,” I retort. He laughs and rolls his eyes.

“I think Embry wants to be the one to tell you about all that,” he states. “Come on, let’s go inside.”

We make our way inside the cute gray house. As soon as we walk in, there’s a bunch of really attractive guys. Two of them I recognize from before, Paul and Embry. I look around for Sam and see him with his arm around a girl who’s face is scratched on one side.

“Don’t stare,” Jacob whispers. I quickly look away. Embry jumps up from his chair.

“Hey, I never properly introduced myself before. I’m Embry Call, I hear you’re Bella’s sister?” He half asks.

I smile. “Hi, yes, she’s my older sister. I’m actually moving here from living with our mother in Florida,” I tell him.

“Oh so you’re staying for good?” He asks.

“Yeah, I guess I am,” I reply. His eyes brighten a little when I say that.

“Let me introduce you to everyone. This is Sam, his fiancée Emily, Jared, you’ve met Paul, Collin, Brady, Quil, Leah, and Seth.” He says, point to each of them.

They all smile and say hi. I smile back awkwardly. I’m not a big fan of being the center of attention, which today, that seems to be happening a lot.

“Embry, well let you go explain everything to (Y/N) while we discuss some pack stuff,” Sam states.

“Right, okay.” Embry says, motioning for me to follow him.

After we’d been walking for a while, I turn to him, anxious to know what everyone has been talking about.

“Now can you please explain what’s happening?” I ask him. He sighs. I have a feeling we will be out here for a while.

“Look, you don’t live in the world you think you do. Have you noticed how my friends and I all have the same tattoo on our upper arm? That’s because we’re all a pack. A wolf pack. We’re shapeshifters. I’m not sure if you’ve heard of the legends around this place and our tribe. But they’re true. And the thing that happened at Bella’s and the Cullen’s house that she got so mad about, well, I may have, sort of, imprinted on you.” He explains.

I raise an eyebrow. “You what?” I ask. I feel so confused and overwhelmed at what he’s telling me.

“It’s a wolf thing, it happens when we make eye contact with our soulmate for the first time after we become shapeshifters. You’re my soulmate. Now, we don’t have to be romantically involved, that is completely up to you and I know that this is a lot for you to take in right now so I completely understand if you don’t want to yet, but just know that I’m your protector now and I can even just be your best friend, but that will be hard for me due to my wolf instincts. But I’d be happy just being a part of your life.” He tells me.

My eyes go wide. I feel so overwhelmed that I have to sit down on a log that’s near us on the ground. “Wow, soulmates, huh?” Is all I can manage to say.

“And I guess now would be the time to tell you that all of those pale people you met at Bella’s were vampires, including Bella and her niece, who is actually her daughter. Well, Renesmee is actually a half vampire but it’s complicated.”

“Wow, well that explains a lot,” I say.

“Wow, how are you so calm? When I first found out about all this stuff, I was a lot less calm than you!” He exclaims.

“Yea well, it’s just, based on what Bella’s been saying to me over the phone, and based on things that just don’t add up, like how you and Paul and Sam got to the house much faster than Jake and I did and why Jake is so warm and why Bella and her new family are all super pale with weird eyes, it just didn’t make any human sense.” I explain.

He breaks out into a huge smile. “You are already amazing,” he tells me.

I can’t help but smile at his enthusiasm. “Well, I’m good with weird.”

“Clearly!” He says.

“So, Embry, can I see this shapeshifting talent you say you have?” I ask. He laughs.

“Well it’s not so much a talent as it is a burden, but sure, if you want,” he replies. “Just know what I’m gonna be completely naked when I phase back so I may have to run ahead of you to the house to grab shorts.”

I laugh. “Okay, I understand.”

Just then, he starts focusing really hard on himself and steam starts coming off of him before he jumps in the air and becomes a wolf. His wolf is really pretty, it’s gray with a heart shape on the face. I think it’s super cool and it makes him even more adorable.

“I don’t know how, but, Embry, you’re a hundred times more adorable to me than you were before!” I tell him. He comes up to me and bows his head down, motioning for me to pet him. He seems pleased when I do so.

“Let’s head back to the house,” I tell him and he runs ahead like he said he would.

I take my time walking back to give him time to recover from the transformation. The whole back I kept thinking about how different my life has become in the last few hours. It’s literally a whole new world and I’m actually excited to get to know it better.

I find my way back to Emily’s and head inside. The boys are all looking at me expectantly, and Embry comes up and stands next to me, giving me a small smile which I gladly return.

“So, what did you think?” Jared smirks. “Scared yet?”

“Actually no, she handled it super well, I’m actually impressed. She handled it better than Bella did,” Embry states proudly.

“Well welcome to the family!” Quil exclaims.

“Yea, we thought Embry would never imprint on someone,” Paul states. “Our boy has become a man.” He jokes and the boys laugh.

I look at Embry who is blushing. I give him a reassuring smile.

“Well, (Y/N), make yourself at home. It seems you’ll be with us for a while,” Emily states, holding out a plate of cookies for me to grab one. I take one and bite into it. They’re actually amazing.

Embry pulls out a chair for me and I sit down. “Such a gentleman,” I say, smiling up at him.

“That’s our Embry,” Quil laughs.

Embry sits down next to me, and a sense of security fills me.

I finally found the real reason why I came back to Forks. This was it.

~~~

Here you go @kpopgirlbtssvt ! It took me forever to write and it’s kinda long but I wanted to build it up just right. I hope you like it!

[attract-mode-collective]

Not An April Fools Gag; That’s A Game Boy Advance With A GameCube Stick Affixed For Reals

What you're seeing is a modded GBA that I spotted on eBay. It's a real thing! Though it doesn't magically grant analogue control to all the digital input only games on the system, which is all of them for the record (sorry). Then again, it could be argued that the controls in WarioWare Twisted is technically analogue...

That aside aside, welcome to yet another recap of stuff posted over at the Attract Mode Twitter! Though this time it's gonna be a bit on the short side, relatively speaking; even I know covering two entire whole weeks has led to hard to handle Tumblr posts, so I'm going to try concentrating on just one week at a time/attempt weekly updates.

Let's see how well that goes...

Hey, it's SF2 IRL thanks to ARKit (via prostheticknowledge)...

At the time, when I first tweeted about it, there were only three left of Amanda Visell’s Player One Mario; no idea how many there are now...

When you can make a decision regarding lunch (via @Mechazawa)....

If you appreciate both the ease of slip-on sneakers and the taste of ghosts, then Games Glorious has something for you (via miki800.com)...

As a connoisseur of video games on the printed page, it is my goal to one day own a copy of Namco's newsletter that was distributed in game centers during the 80s & 90s, NG (via miki800)...

Remember that time Namco got someone from Yellow Magic Orchestra to hawk their wares (via namcomuseum)...

Both in print and on TV…

The YMO member in question, Haruomi Hosono, also did a Xevious remix album, which longtime readers of the blog will hopefully recall.

Sticking with Namco CMs, there’s a pair of longtime faves that I could have sworn I’ve already posted as well, yet cannot find. Though as noted, many times already, the search functionality here is broken.

So here’s a boy playing with his Famicom in the middle of the woods...

And here’s a girl playing with his Famicom in the middle of the woods...

Back to the subject of print, can’t seem to find any info on the Futabasha Fantasy Novel Series, which (I think) was a line of video game novelizations; this one appears to be written by the creator of Xevious himself (via shmups)...

The focus here is supposed to be the Lawson’s reward card with Kirby on it, but I am all about that Space Invaders whatever the heck it is (via miki800)...

Spent MANY hours at Japanese bookstores during my college years, flipping through Sega Saturn Magazine; seeing these VF Kids ads again makes me feel all warm & fuzzy (via thesegasource)...

This (what I believe to be a) farewell image of the face of the Saturn from the very first issue of Dreamcast Magazine, also gives me the feels (via oldgamemags)...

BTW, everyone knows the identity of Saturn's pitchman (Segata Sanshiro), but what about the Mega Drive's? (via yokosuka87)...

Back to the Saturn; I love how Sega want from Segata Sanshiro to Hidekazu Yukawa for the Dreamcast. This launch edition of the console, btw, was spotted at VideoGamesNewYork...

It's also where they Kira Kira Star Night DX for twice the asking price, as @gamespite)...

Speaking of music, to fully enjoy this animated gif of Eggman running…

… you need to have this song playing (via lunaticobscurity).

And to fully enjoy this image of Eggman on the sax…

... you need to have this song playing (via very-territorial-oak).

@ondoruragitan sez: "whoever designed that clown lady in ace attorney is probably the most horny artist to ever exist" (it's funny cuz it's true)...

So the big news these past few weeks, especially among video game folk my age, has been the end of the Toys R Us. Many have been sharing artifacts from the glory days, with my fave example being these old flyers, with the obvious highlight seeing all the original MSRP prices (via retrogamerblog)...

Oh, and don’t forget the gifs (via nintendroid)...

The following are more appropriate for my way, way overdue batch of game culture snapshots, but since we're on the subject of retail anyway; I recently stumbled across Nintendo's collab with Bloomingdale's that I had no idea even existed...

Took a bunch of pics, but unfortunately, due to the harsh lighting at the SoHo store, it was impossible to capture the women’s section, hence the abundance of men’s wear...

These women's sweatshirts are the best example of the line's overall design sensibilities, or lack thereof; it’s just a bunch of random Nintendo sprites on attire that is available at Bloomingdale's, period. That's all it aspires to be, nothing more...

... And that's a real shame, cuz aside from the quality of the clothing itself being high, some of the ho-hum looking designs could be really engaging with a few minor tweaks, like this b&w women's jacket with a very random assortment of b&w Super Mario World sprites...

In addition to clothing, you had accessories, like iPhone cases...

Plus sunglasses, which revealed Super Mario World playing on what appears to the naked eye to be a blank, white screen....

Speaking of Super Mario World, here's a hamster enjoying the game (via @kousuke_teppei)...

The lil guy also owns an original Famicom, and here we is playing Solomon's Key (thanks to @Topherocious for helping me to identify the game)...

Being that friend who is REALLY into video games means I'm asked a wide variety of questions from folks who are not, like why @beesmygod  is "freaking out" over a Sonic & Garfield two pack for the PC...

... I'll be honest, I don't really understand why either.

Here we have a mockup for an ad blocker that replaces banners with GBA screenshots, which I really want to see happen (via @tinycartridge)...

I also really want to see this happen too (via @truongasm)...

Back to Tiny Cart; that's where I found out that you no longer have to play emulated Tiger handheld games sans backgrounds...

Nothing beats a pic of a dimly lit arcade, especially when it's shot on ACTUAL film (via mendelpalace)...

As for this particular arcade show, @kappuru theorizes "it looks like cinestill film, or a filter designed to mimic it." (via parkerwoods)...

"WHO IS THIS NUN?! WHY DOES SHE LOOK SO SINISTER?" is a great KOF related question (via vice-s-assistant)...

And "BOWL BEFORE ME" is a great KOF related gag (via brondeef)...

"this is the best cosplay i’ve ever seen" is a a great costume play related observation made by lunaticobscurity...

"how to get away with playing super mario odyssey in class" is the caption given by retrogamerblog...

"Stardew Valley gave me 500 characters to use as my farm name, so I put down an entire 1-star amazon review for an Independence Day DVD" is the explanation given by @NoahHafford...

Hey, you never know, maybe one day a homebrew dev might make “Shinjuku-Nichome Gay District Serial Murders” a reality? (via mendelpalace)

When you’ve got one copy of Melee with two boxes, and one copy of Air Ride with zero boxes… just gotta improvise (via stellatuna)...

When you’ve got a killer Game Genie code but no paper to write it down on... and then you discover the code does something totally different (via theassortment)...

And when I asked what this 4koma featuring a Dreamcast VMU was all about, @JonahD was kind enough to explain: "VMUs are playing hide and seek, Black is seeking. One VMU thinks hiding in the controller would be good but it makes a bunch of noise and they’re found immediately" (via posthumanwanderings)...

Whereas I have yet to find out what all these Sonics are doing at a German airport (via sonicthehedgeblog)...

I normally don’t let the weather get to me, yet the constant cold weather in NYC over the past few weeks began taking its toll, to the point that I’m starting to resemble an upside down Super Famicom/European SNES (via sixteen-bit)...

I also really wish I could have checked out Sakura-Con, and not just cuz the weather is so much nicer in Seattle, but to pick up @alexisparade's Monster Factory zine...

I stared at gif illustrating the wacky perspective-related behavior of Super Mario 64’s trees for an entire day, no joke (via suppermariobroth)...

Here we have the rarely seen alternate angle of the internet famous "LAN party gamer duct-taped to the ceiling" photo (via reddit.com)...

Turning the clock back even further, here's yet another kind of party, one that doesn’t involve first person shooters but shoot ‘em ups; it’s the 1986 Hudson Caravan (via videogamesdensetsu)...

Recently, a modded NES Max controller showed up on Kotaku, in which the cycloid nub has been replaced with an analogue stick...

... Which actually appeared the day after I spotted that modded GBA at the very top of this page. I am also willing to admit the disappointment over my tweet not catching on as expected/hoped it would, hence why I'm sharing another pic...

At any rate, I was also reminded of my buddy Nick Santaniello's modded Jaguar controller, which allows for arcade perfect Tempest 2000 controls...

... Which in turned led to me republishing the post from which it hails from originally, my recap of Nick's Shmup Appreciation Night, for Medium (and also sharing additional pics on Twitter)...

BTW, for those wondering, based upon the last round of tweets; the kitchen isn’t just for playing old Mega Drive & PC Engine shmups… you can also play old Naomi fighting games (via internetflexin)...

Guess that's it for now? Sorry, but it finally feels like spring in NYC, and I feel the need to step away from the computer & enjoy weather! Just like Mega Man (via arcadequartermaster)...

[5sos-aka-life]

i’m gonna be a massive dick and ask: 1-100

HAHAHAH alright well here we go then. Also thank you from saving me from the world’s most boring lecture rn.

Everything will be under a read more inorder to save people’s dash but feel free to learn more about me haha.

1. The meaning behind my url: 

I feel like its kinda self explanatory. I made this back when I was a giant 5sos fan and I’m too lazy to change it and idk what I would change it to if I did. I might soon though.

2. A picture of me:

3. How many tattoos i have and what they are:

I have 1 tattoo currently and it’s a pinky promise. I got it with a former friend. I have a couple more planned I just need money for them.

4. Last time i cried and why:

Like 2 weeks ago because I miss social interaction.

5. Piercings i have:

I have my ears pierced but never wear earrings, I have another set of piercings and I used to have my nose pierced but it got ripped out at work one day. Do not reccommend it hurt like a bitch.

6. Favorite band:

Not a band per say but I’ve really been into Tones and I lately, specifically never felt the rain.

7. Biggest turn offs:

Definitely not being motivated. I am very driven and like for sure have goals that I am working towards and want to achieve and when someone just has no goals (even small ones) makes me feel like I’m dragging them along and acting as their mother almost. Also people who can’t keep a conversation, like I’m not really one for small talk like I’d rather talk about the mysteries of the universe you know.

8. Top 5 (insert subject):

You didn’t provide a subject so I’m just gonna say songs:

Never felt the rain - Tones and I

Is everybody going crazy? - Nothing but thieves

Complainer - Cold War Kids

Trampoline - Shaed

Don’t stop me now - Queen (permanently in top 5)

9. Tattoos i want:

I have several lined up. My next is going to be a crow with some minimalist geometric lining in the back and some hydrangeas and delphiniums around it on my forearm. Next I’m going to get a small snapdragon along the outside of my forearm. Then I want to get my thigh pieces done one will be a watercolor tree and the other will be watercolor mountains and it’ll have some quotes underneath them.

10. Biggest turn ons:

I like assertive people who aren’t dickheads. 

11. Age:

22

12. Ideas of a perfect date:

I’m super easy to please so pretty much any place where we can actually do something because i find that that helps break through the awkwardness of dates.

13. Life goal:

To buy my mom a house and live close to my family

14. Piercings i want:

My nose repierced, maybe like a double nose piercing idk yet.

15. Relationship status:

Happily single 

16. Favorite movie:

Grave of Fireflies

17. A fact about my life:

hmmm I have like 7 siblings.

18. Phobia:

Bugs and spiders, the idea of the feeling of them walking on me freaks me out.

19. Middle name:

McKenna

20. Height:

5′4″

21. Are you a virgin?

Nope 

22. What’s your shoe size?

women’s 8, men’s 6

23. What’s your sexual orientation?

Tbh still figuring that out but pansexual

24. Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs?

I drink occasionally but not very often

25. Someone you miss:

my awesome coworkers rn

26. What’s one thing you regret?

Not taking time to focus on myself earlier than I did

27. First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive:

Kate McKinnon

28. Favorite ice cream?

Cheesecake or honeycomb toffee

29. One insecurity:

My body shape/size

30. What my last text message says:

“Most likely yes. I know Steven was walking his dog through the park by himself and a cop was giving him shit for it”

31. Have you ever taken a picture naked?

Ooof yeah

32. Have you ever painted your room?

Yeah my childhood room at both parents house and then i had to change rooms immediately after at one and the eother moved houses.

33. Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?

Yup!

34. Have you ever slept naked?

Not fully i don’t think

35. Have you ever danced in front of your mirror?

Of course!

36. Have you ever had a crush?

hahaha unfortunately yeah

37. Have you ever been dumped?

Yeah pretty even with the dumped/dumping ratio

38. Have you ever stole money from a friend?

No, if anything i give my friends all my money if they need it

39. Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met?

Like only people I just me? No. With people that I also know? yeah

40. Have you ever been in a fist fight?

Nah never gotten to that point

41. Have you ever snuck out of your house?

No but I have lied about where I’m going/doing.

42. Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?

Ooof yeah I have

43. Have you ever been arrested?

Nope and I’m trying to keep it that way

44. Have you ever made out with a stranger?

Yeah, it wasn’t very good though

45. Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere?

Yeah for like dates or hangouts

46. Have you ever left your house without telling your parents?

Yeah, it didn’t go over too well but it was several years ago

47. Have you ever had a crush on your neighbor?

Nah all of my neighbors have been way younger than me or like 70

48. Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?

Yeah I do it with college all the time haha

49. Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex?

Yeah mostly platonically though

50. Have you ever seen someone die?

No and I’m glad that I haven’t

51. Have you ever been on a plane?

Yeah a ton actually

52. Have you ever kissed a picture?

I’m sure I have in my cringey teenage phase.

53. Have you ever slept in until 3?

Not quite that late as I’m a relatively early riser, the lastest I’ve slept in is like 1

54. Have you ever loved someone or miss someone right now?

I’ve loved people yeah but I don’t miss anyone in that way rn. Like every relationship has ended for a reason.

55. Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by?

Yeah it’s a really relaxing thing to do

56. Have you ever made a snow angel?

Yeah but not a huge fan of it cuz i don’t like the cold

57. Have you ever played dress up?

Yeah I’m pretty sure most young girls do

58. Have you ever cheated while playing a game?

Yeah I’m sure I have

59. Have you ever been lonely?

Yeah but I like to try to move past it and not fixate on it, easier said than done though.

60. Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school?

Yeah I was super sick at school one day and fell asleep from all the medicine I had to take

61. Have you ever been to a club?

Nah I’m more of a bar person if I’m gonna go out with people

62. Have you ever felt an earthquake?

Yeah a couple since living in California

63. Have you ever touched a snake?

Yeah my brother used to own one

64. Have you ever ran a red light?

Yeah on accident, I was driving home from a really late night at work and was kinda zoned out so I didn’t even realize it was red. Luckily it was a super small street and it was late enough no one was on the roads.

65. Have you ever been suspended from school?

Nope I’m a good girl.

66. Have you ever had detention?

Yeah I was late too many times for a class

67. Have you ever been in a car accident?

Yeah I rear ended someone on my way to a new job like a couple days after getting my new car

68. Have you ever hated the way you look?

Yes I am not happy with the way I look right now but I’m working on accepting my body and chaning the things that I can

69. Have you ever witnessed a crime?

I don’t believe so.

70. Have you ever pole danced?

No but I’d love to learn sometime.

71. Have you ever been lost?

Definitely, I’m not the greatest with directions

72. Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country?

Yup I used to live in michigan and now I live in Cali

73. Have you ever felt like dying?

Unfortunately yeah

74. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?

Also yes unfortunately

75. Have you ever sang karaoke?

Yeah I love it

76. Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t?

Yeah but it didn’t turn out to be that bad

77. Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?

I don’t think so but maybe

78. Have you ever slept with someone at least 5 years older or younger?

No but I have dated someone who was 5 years older than me

79. Have you ever kissed in the rain?

No but I’d love to given the opportunity

80. Have you ever sang in the shower?

All the time

81. Have you ever made out in a park?

No, no one ever wants to go with me

82. Have you ever dream that you married someone?

Yeah but I couldn’t see who it was

83. Have you ever glued your hand to something?

Not my whole hand but definitely a finger

84. Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flag pole?

No haha those are too dirty

85. Have you ever gone to school partially naked?

Not completely, but there was a time where I was so tired i forgot to put a shirt on under my zip up hoodie and didn’t realize until i went to take it off.

86. Have you ever been a cheerleader?

No but I was a dancer

87. Have you ever sat on a roof top?

No but I want to at somepoint

88. Have you ever brushed your teeth?

Yeah gotta be hygenic

89. Have you ever been too scared to watch scary movies alone?

All the time, I don’t do scary movies

90. Have you ever played chicken?

Yeah a couple of times

91. Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?

I don’t think so but I wouldn’t put it past my brothers

92. Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger?

I’ve had people hit on me at work

93. Have you ever broken a bone?

Yup my right wrist when I was 3.

94. Have you ever been easily amused?

Yeah I’m sure I have

95. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?

Yeah a couple of times

96. Have you ever mooned/flashed someone?

No not that confident haha

97. Have you ever cheated on a test?

Yeah a couple

98. Have you ever forgotten someone’s name?

All the time, it takes a couple of interactions for it to really stick

99. Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?

Yeah but always when I’ve had surface level interactions

100. Give us one thing about you that no one knows.

Hmmmm. I’m a hopeless romantic but don’t like to show it.

[caraferguson]

Adventures in Victoria

I wrote a few emails to a friend back in the spring of 2010. Recently searching for some other emails I stumbled across these and, inspired by another friend's posting cool stories about his current trip to Victoria, decided to post my dusty tales - well at least the first few days of my adventure. 

Here we go...names have been changed to protect the (not so) innocent:

Cara's Excellent Adventure - Hello Victoria:)

Wow.  Victoria is beautiful.  The hotel is very stuffy and stodgy and kind of faded but cool.  Reminds me of the way my Grandma's house (100 plus years old) in Shelburne smelled.  I think they may have actually imported some of her original furniture because the couch in my room is the spitting image of one she had in the parlour (seriously, not a living room or great room - a parlour) back in the day.  There is even a stain on it reminiscent of the time I spilled lime Kool-Aid whilst fighting with my older brother over who got the last potato chip.  Hmmm. Btw I tricked him (actually I may possibly have hit him with a hard object which probably doesn't fit the definition of tricking him exactly) and got the potato chip in case you were wondering.  And blamed him for the stain too ha ha. I'm just going to tell myself the stain on this couch is lime Kool-Aid cuz the alternative could be quite unsettling.  

The reception here was so nice. So posh and gracious.  They upgraded me to a deluxe room because I am so cute I think.  Okay, so maybe that's a stretch. They probably upgraded me because I arrived early and they didn't want me loitering in the lobby attracting sailors (it's the 100 anniversary of the Navy and the streets are crawling with men & women in uniform) or pestering the guests with my Queen imitation.  I do a pretty mean Queen wave btw - wrist positioning is critical to a successfully authentic Queen wave.  That was also in case you are wondering.  Ahh, I bet I've inspired you to try it now haven't I?  I can see you doing it right now.  Careful, not too much curvature to the fingers.  Tut tut cheerio and all that.

Well off to the gym - good thing about this place is that it's high tea and all the Stodgies are heading to the upper Lobby which leaves the gym empty for me to use.  Which is good because I get very red-faced and sweaty and when others are around my workouts are frequently interrupted by people asking me if I'm okay and/or if they should call 911 or trying to zap me with those defibrillator (sp?) thingies.  This is why I work out in my garage.  I did tour the Y and may get a membership so I can work with one of the trainers there but I'll probably have to make up a big sign to wear around my neck that says "I'm okay.  Really." or "Put the damn defibrillator thingie away before someone loses an eye".  Or something like that.

Day One of Cara's Excellent Adventure 

Woke up at the crack of yawn.  Seriously.  That three hour time difference is a killer.  4:30 here and wide awake.  I'm thinking I'd like some breakfast so I can fuel up before an early trip to the gym but nothing is open.  Okay, well nothing within reasonable/safe walking distance that I know of is open.  I'm regretting not taking the time yesterday to hunt down a market and pick up some fruit and cereal or something.

I make some coffee, do some work, kill some time.  I consider ordering room service but even though it's coming out of the company's account I can't bring myself to order two eggs, fruit and coffee for $30.  I don't know if I told you this but my maiden name is Ferguson...Scottish blood...I'm not cheap but spending that kind of money on breakfast goes against my very DNA.  So I go out for a walk and find a Smitty's and get the same for $10.  I decide to explore a bit and head out around downtown Victoria.  Still, nothing is open yet but it's a nice walk along the harbour and little nooks and crannies of the city. 

I'm walking along Government Street, very pretty, lush, green trees and foliage, the sun is shining and I'm snapping photos.  It's absolutely freezing out but still such a beautiful day and I'm enjoying it.  As I walk out under a canopy of dense greenery I hear a sudden bloodcurdling shriek and the heavy rushing sound of a huge wingspan propelling an ominous dark object at my head.  The air swirls around me and I feel talons scrape over my scalp.  It happened fast. I didn't scream or run or wet my pants even.  I bravely and calmly swatted at the air around my head as though it was an irritating fly and not a tourist-eating pterodactyl - a renegade that had escaped from the Jurassic Park movie set and made its home here.  I felt around my head.  No puncture wounds or pre-historic bird poop.  I admit, I was relieved.  Perhaps it was my fault and I should have spent more time brushing my hair when I got up this morning - the creature may have thought I was walking off with its nest on my head.  Because even though I go to bed with relatively calm, straight hair somehow, over the course of the night, something happens to it that normally would require a can of hairspray, a rat-tailed comb and a Weed Whacker to accomplish.

So I head back to the hotel thinking - okay, I've probably left enough time for breakfast to digest - time to hit the gym.  Back to my room, into my workout clothes and ready to rumble.  Now I frequently make a habit of taking the stairs whenever I can and I happen to be one door down from some exit stairs.  Let me back up a minute actually.  My room is at the end of a really, really long hallway that is off another really, really long hallway.  One of them is so long that you can't even really see the end of it properly.  And there is a big, big ramp you have to use.  Oh, and about that ramp.  Big ramp that you can see a mile down the hallway, this is not a little carpet speed bump let me tell you, and they have this teeny tiny little sign on the wall that says "Caution ramp".  Now I ask you - if someone's eyesight is so bad that they don't see the ramp how the heck is a little sign going to help them to avoid tripping?  Really?  Does that make sense to you?  But I digress.  Anyway.  I decide to take the stairs that are at the end of this killer long hallway down to the Fitness Room.  That is when I discovered that this is the stairway to the bowels of the hotel and not the Fitness Room.  It is a stairway that no one ever uses.  And all of the doors to each floor lock behind you.  And there is no technology that allows you to just swipe your room key to get out.  I have to confess, I didn't try every floor but I tried a lot.  And they were locked.  And it was an unkempt, musty stairwell.  There were cobwebs and such. I kid you not.  Not having any luck going up I went back down, down, down to the aforementioned bowels.  I manage to get a door open to a dark, dank room ... a few puddles on the floor - drips coming from the ceiling.  A single bulb kind of swinging in the middle of the room.  It was freakin' creepy let me tell you. Knowing that if there are pterodactyls on the loose there could also be a few escaped raptors running around I'm nervous.  I expect to see a huge bloody carcass swinging from the ceiling - hey, it is a meat conference I'm at - this is not so far-fetched. Plus I also had a long discussion with someone the other day about a few Stephen King novels that scared the pants off of me and this room had Stephen King potential.  My footsteps actually echoed dully...once again I kid you not.  Then I heard voices.  I was quiet but I wasn't sneaking up on them purposely - I was trying to figure out if they were employees or some hotel bowel dwelling scary people.  They were employees.  And they actually yelped (aka screamed like little girls) when they saw me (once again I considered that perhaps I should do something about my hair) but it was because they hadn't expected a human to come from the direction I'd come from and possibly also because I'd caught them smoking pot.  I explained my predicament, they said they had forgotten there were even stairs there, and there were so many places you could get lost in this hotel.  They showed me how to get to the Fitness Room.  I tell you I was never so happy to see a gym before.  And, for the record, I did go back and check the stairwell.  There was no sign indicating that if you entered the stairwell the door would lock forever behind you...so they have a sign warning you about a huge ramp that if you don't notice you probably deserve to trip over but no sign to indicate that you could be trapped for all eternity in the stairwell once the door closes and locks behind you.  Go figure. 

Rest assured that  I made a note of that on my hotel comment card.  

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful after that - I worked out for an hour, had a long shower, got ready to meet my friend who was arriving around lunch.   We did high tea (which despite the name does not involve any pot other than that which holds the tea). It was kind of a letdown though it was tasty. Just thought people should have to go all poshed up but there were tons of people in jeans and baseball caps.  Somehow it needed the posh part to be special.

Went out to explore again - avoiding the site of the pterodactyl attack - which, by the way, after eyewitness reports (I ended up meeting someone this evening that had witnessed it) I've discovered it was just a big, bad-assed crow and I'd walked too close to its nest.  Apparently this has happened before and had nothing to do with my lackadaisical hair care.

Anyway, after that it was a cocktail on the hotel veranda where they actually bring blankets out for you.  I thought it was just for me and because it was evident that I was badly in need of a nap but apparently everyone gets one to use if they want.  Not that I'd want to wrap myself up in a blanket that a stranger had been using.  Well not until after a few cocktails at least.  After said cocktails I went back to my room and quickly fell asleep.  

The rest of it you kind of know.  Meat reception (mmmm meat).  Ran into Mr. X and he was really nice to me and we talked for ages.  That was new.

Okay...so I have sooo rambled on.  But it's a pretty good record of my day.  Only mildly exaggerated.  Truly adventurous.  I like it here!

[littlecatholiclady91]

NO lol The other ones! So we can get to know you better :] the ones that start with 0: Height1: and so on hehe

Fount it lol :D your wish is my command I'm not all that great lol just your regular girl trying to do Gods will.

Wanna be nosy. . . here's your chance

0: Height 5ft lol I'm a shorty! 

1: Virgin? Yes, saving myself for marriage, or incase my vocation is being a religious sister, still really discerning.

2: Shoe size: 7

3: Do you smoke? not a smoker

4: Do you drink? hmmm i had a drink at the dodger game lol but i hardly ever its like once or twice a year or on new years

5: Do you take drugs? no drugs

6: Age you get mistaken for: usually from 18-22 and I'm 25 turning 26 this year

7: Have tattoos? no tattoos

8: Want any tattoos? yes i wanted either an anchor or butterflies but I'm to much of a chicken

9: Got any piercings? two piercings. 

10: Want any piercings? yes i wanted one on my eyebrow for a long time but thank God i never got it. 

11: Best friend? one esmer, we've been friends since our junior year of high school

12: Relationship status: single, I do not date and i am not looking lol, i trust in God that i will meet the right man and we will become friends and go form there. 

13: Biggest turn ons: a smile, someone who can talk up a storm and is funny.

14: Biggest turn offs: rude guys lol who are not nice 

15: Favorite movie: the notebook for sure lol

16: I’ll love you if: you love the dodgers lol 

17: Someone you miss: hmmm i don't really miss anyone at the moment, i have everyone i need in my life, wait yes i do my godmother. we've let distance get in the way and we hardly talk now.

18: Most traumatic experience: I had an accident maybe 3 years ago the car stopped in the middle of the freeway all my family was in the van my little brothers we got hit in the back, my glasses went flying and i hit my lip with my own teeth and had a swollen lip for a very long time but i was more worried for my little brother who was in the back and if he would of been on the other side of the seat he would of for sure gotten squished :( 

19: A fact about your personality: way to nice

20: What I hate most about myself: i settle way to fast! if I'm happy ill just be like okay we all good, but i shouldn't do that i should strive for more, want more because i know I'm capable of so much more, work wise.

21: What I love most about myself: my caring heart!! makes me feel 100x more but i wouldn't change it for not even all the money in the world. God makes no mistakes (this i mean in a the most humblest way ever) 

22: What I want to be when I get older: a nurse lol 

23: My relationship with my sibling(s): the best i love them will all my heart.

24: My relationship with my parent(s): I love my parents, and now i appreciate how strict they were with me.

25: My idea of a perfect date: Going to mass on a Sunday. See why i want to take my time, be best friends with the guy, cuz he’ll know exactly what i want lol 

26: My biggest pet peeves: squeaky sounds!!! lol or people who throw food at each other i can't lol

27: A description of the girl/boy I like: He has such a beautiful smile, he's tall not skinny but not chunky lol he's in between, he has these sleepy eyes that just make him so so cute, his hair is a good length at the top and its wavy when he doesnt put any product on it. lol. pretty handsome guy. 

28: A description of the person I dislike the most: oh man i haven't really disliked anyone in awhile. 

29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend: when i just want to stay home :/ and to embarrassed to tell them I don't want to hang out with them. 

30: What I hate the most about work/school: its not hate, but a dislike the creepy men/patients that make the job so uncomfortable. 

31: What your last text message says: I'm in a prayer group and one of the ladies said she couldn't make it to the parish this morning lol

32: What words upset me the most: negative words, mean words 

33: What words make me feel the best about myself:words of encouragement, or letting me know what i mean to you, or if I'm doing things right, and words of criticism too if I'm doing something wrong let me know.

34: What I find attractive in women: well i don't check women out lol 

35: What I find attractive in men: personality always, how you carry yourself and how confident you are, then a smile, I'm sucker for smiles!! 

36: Where I would like to live: anywhere by the beach, or in Seattle Washington 

37: One of my insecurities: for sure being short!! 

38: My childhood career choice: 1st grade teacher

39: My favorite ice cream flavor: vanilla, or cookies n cream

40: Who wish I could be: no one really I want to be the best version of myself a good godly woman who serves the Lord in everything that she does. 

41: Where I want to be right now: passed my vn exam, and live in San Gabriel CA 

42: The last thing I ate: grilled cheese lol 

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately: hmmm this instragram famous guy who goes by the name of tony lol very attractive!

44: A random fact about anything:  Elephants are the only mammals that can't jump i looked it up lol!!!!