#‘shes an honest to god lady’!! does it look like i give a fuck???

[clawfootcoffin]

loved hearing lena put her foot down in the newest ep….. gwen and her are quite literally an unstoppable force meeting an immovable object and it is So entertaining to watch.

can’t wait to see how their rivalry concludes (it will almost certainly end with one or both of them Dead)

[wheneverfeasible]

🧠🪱Wriggly Wednesday🪱🧠

Thanks for the tag @stervrucht!

So I was literally just thinking about Sugar Daddy Steddie with rockstar Eddie, coincidentally enough…

🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞

Okay so get this. Eddie Munson is some fucking metal legend. Corroded Coffin made it big, right? Right out of high school some scout saw them playing and swooped them up immediately, and before you knew it they were household names. Even people who don’t listen to metal know who they are.

And look, Steve Harrington? Metal is so not his scene. That much is obvious with his striped polos and overly large noise cancelling headphones, but he’s there in the crowd, front row, with a pack of teenagers scampering about. Obviously not his own, but he’s watching them, a glorified babysitter. He looks kind of bitchy, but the occasional fond smile settles over his lips as he takes in the lot who are having the time of their lives.

They all have backstage passes and are there for Dustin’s birthday because Corroded Coffin is his all-time favorite band and he’s always wanted to meet the guy he idol worships. They go backstage, meet the band, and it’s great. Fantastic even. The band is a lot more down to earth than Steve had been expecting, and there’s no naked ladies or drugs in obvious places, so he decides maybe they aren’t too terrible.

Except the frontman keeps hitting on Steve.

At first it was startling, because Steve isn’t some cheap whore (no hate to actual cheap whores, Steve is 100% sex work positive, but he’s there as a babysitter), but Eddie doesn’t spend the whole time hitting on Steve. He actually spends the majority of it talking to Dustin and the others, and he gives way more free shit to the teens than was agreed upon with the backstage passes, and he and the rest of the band sign anything and everything the teens want.

(Eddie also offers to sign Steve’s tits, which gets him a flat glare.)

And that should be it when they leave. Except Eddie slips Steve his number. For when he’s not acting a babysitter.

And that’s the thing. When Steve isn’t in babysitter mode? Fuck. Eddie Munson could get it.

Steve might not be a whore, but he is a bit of a slut. And Eddie had been far more charming that he let it be revealed, not least of which being because of how he handled Dustin and the others, especially sweet El. He’d absolutely beamed when she called his outfit “bitchin’” and there was no artifice there.

Now, Steve wasn’t some groupie, but…he wasn’t opposed to hooking up with a hot rockstar in a band he couldn’t really care about if it got him some good dick.

And good dick he gets. But first, Eddie actually takes him out, taking him out to a really nice and fancy restaurant, despite Steve not dressing for the occasion expecting this to be a hit-it-and-quit-it situation, but Eddie pays off the staff to look the other way. After all, Eddie’s not really dressed all that appropriately either.

Then Eddie takes him for an honest-to-god moonlit carriage ride around the park, complete with flowers and cheesy romantic music. Steve would like to say he was unaffected, but it really did it for him. He was a romantic sap but he was used to being the one always having to be the giver, never the receiver. It was…nice. And sweet, because god, Eddie Munson was secretly a sweetheart when you got him alone.

And then, after the sweet and romantic date, the two of them have the most disrespectful sex of Steve’s life.

He can’t get enough of it.

He knows what this is, however. He knows someone like Eddie Munson probably does this every tour, picking up some random person and wining and dining them and then teaching them things that would make the Kama Sutra blush.

Except, when he sneaks out Eddie’s room in the hotel penthouse in the morning, bruised and rumpled in all the right ways, the rest of the band lounging in the sitting room are as surprised to see him as he is to see them. Because, it turns out, apparently Eddie doesn’t do this. At least not to the extent he showed Steve.

No one was ever asked to stay until morning, at least.

But Steve has to go home, and he thinks that’s it. But then Eddie comes out and asks for a second date when he tries to leave. Offers more backstage passes to the next show for the kids, and Steve is hesitant to say yes, and that’s when Eddie hits him with another surprise.

Eddie says that he doesn’t care that Steve is a babysitter or a nanny or whatever, he isn’t doing this out of pity over Steve’s financial issues, which he accompanies with a slight tug at the worn and slightly frayed edges of Steve’s polo. He says that he just wants to treat Steve right because Steve deserves it. That he wants to buy him pretty things and shower him with whatever he wants. Wants to keep having the sweetest dates with the most disrespectful sex with him.

And Steve…well. Steve is stumped.

Sure, he’s wearing old clothes, but he thought he was just having a dick appointment. And yeah, he was a babysitter, but the teens were actually weirdly his friends despite the age differences, not to mention many were the younger siblings of his other, more age appropriate friends. And yeah, Steve had blushed when Eddie mentioned going to a fancy restaurant and said he didn’t have the money for it, but that’s because he left his wallet behind because, as previously stated, he’d thought this was just a dick appointment.

But you see, Steve Harrington was the CEO of a major international corporation that had been in the Harrington family for generations who, once Steve took the helm from his father, had also recently begun work in far more charitable organizations and activities. His company was, in fact, one of the major donors that supported the arena in which Corroded Coffin had just played in last night. The company’s logo, a small crown with the company’s initials, was printed on all the tickets and on the backstage passes.

How else would Steve have been able to afford over half a dozen of them if he was living on just a babysitter’s salary.

Yet, here was Eddie, offering to be his…sugar daddy?

Steve would have laughed, was tempted to even, but Eddie looked so genuine and earnest and like truly all he wanted was to spend more time with Steve.

And really. Steve was so used to having to be the one to provide luxuries for his dates, to be the one in charge, to always have to give give give. Maybe, just maybe, he could play along with Eddie’s utter misunderstanding and take just a little bit. He’d pay Eddie back when the rockstar got bored of him and moved on, so really, what was the harm?

So yeah, Steve just smiles and says Okay, Daddy, and accepts the goddamn gifts Eddie had apparently already bought for him even before their date, and he lets himself have his fun.

After all, it’s not like it’s gonna turn into anything long lasting, right? Nothing serious, right? And there’s absolutely no way that they could ever fall in love…

…right?

Aaaaand yeah. Other things that I envision could pop up in the story:

Robin is his best friend and works for him with international clients due to being polylingual. She discovers what is going on and calls him a dingus. She also wants all the gossip.

Dustin finds a diamond studded collar in his bedroom that says “Babygirl” and asks if Steve is getting a dog. He was looking for something to wear to impress a date and Steve forgot Eddie’s latest gift was still on his bed.

Steve is in full sugar baby mode when they accidentally run into one of Steve’s business associates and/or they are at one of the venue locations Steve secretly owns and he’s trying desperately to hide anything that might have his name or face on it.

In the end, Steve starts buying Eddie expensive gifts too which freaks Eddie out because he doesn’t want Steve to waste what little money he has on him. Or so he thinks.

Some big angsty misunderstandings and the truth finally being revealed. It ends with them agreeing to spoil each other, but only Steve gets to be called “Babygirl” and Eddie remains “Daddy”. Everyone is sick of how in love they are.

-

Hostage tag: @derythcorvinus

No pressure tags: @scoops-aboy86 @endlessmusings1801 @viviseawrites @steddieassheg0es @stevesbipanic (if you’ve previously been tagged, just ignore me!)

[avocado-writing]

Hi 😊 Can I request the bg3 ladies of your choice (Minthara is my favorite but you may include anyone else you like!) and how they eat pussy please 🤭

hehe Ofc >:) MINORS DNI. FILTH AHEAD

Karlach

she gets overstimulated easily. eating you out is such a turn on for her. when her tongue is between your folds you can hear the way she begins to moan and whine, her hips rutting downwards for stimulation.

it’s easier to ask her to sit on your face and give each other mutual oral; she gets wet super easily, you can taste the enthusiasm for you on her cunt.

technique < enthusiasm. she goes hard and fast with her tongue, burying her face between your legs and practically motorboating you. it’s a lot. it’s good when you get used to it though, and when you cum you hear her go “yes!!!” in triumph.

Lae’zel

vicious. teethy. you will ache afterwards.

likes to suck and bite a lot. you will get bruises on your thighs, stomach, pussy lips.

pretty much bites your clit. you gasp from the stimulation and she just holds you down into the bedroll to bury her face further into you.

you should stroke her hair and ears as she goes though, and you’ll hear her let out a little grunt of satisfaction 💕

Shadowheart

now to be honest she prefers to be pampered in bed, so she likes to receive more than give. that isn’t to say she won’t, though! and when she does…

she won’t stop until you’ve come at least twice from her tongue and fingers. she likes to look up at you from between your legs, focussed on your lust, and she’ll instruct you to moan her name.

a master with her tongue. loves to press it inside of you and see how wet you are for her.

is very smug at the good job she’s done in the afterglow too, lmao.

Minthara

oh gods. probably the best at eating pussy on this list.

when you ask her, or when she moves to start, she gets a sort of wicked look in her eye.

clamps her arms around your thighs and begins to tease you, little kitten-licks, breathing hotly on the wetness of your cunt.

when you can’t take it any more she pushes you further anyway. edging queen. slides a single finger into you to give you some penetration but only moves it slowly to eke the pleasure out.

every time you’re about to come she moves away and has you calm down. you chase her with your hips but she won’t let you.

when you do come? it’s so intense you feel like your soul has left your fucking body. all you can do is chant her name over and over in prayer and watch the way she grins at how she’s undone you.

you will immediately return the favour.

Jaheira

look. she’s done it all. she’s put her time in. she’s been around the block and knows how to eat pussy.

perfect master of giving just enough to drive you wild. pays equal attention to all areas of your cunt. you hear her laugh when you buck your hips into her face for more.

lets you ride your orgasm out on the palm of her hand and you will be thankful for it.

she just smiles and tells you, “good job, little one.” that’s enough to make you come again right there and then.

[raya-hunter01]

Will You Be My Lady? Pt. 2

One Shot! Finale

Jey Uso x Black Female OC! (Candice)

Roman x Black Female OC!

Jimmy x Trin

Rating: 18+

Warning: oral, fluff,Sex

Summary: Candice suffers from a painful past with the Tribal Chief Roman reigns. In the aftermath, Main Event Jey Uso is begging for a chance to show her all love and affection. Will Candice go back to her ex or will she allow Jey to show her love?

She’s mine

The loving atmosphere in the club had me on edge and watching Candice singing her heart to of all people my cousin had me pissed off.

“Joe, I’m ready to go,” Sasha said as I groaned watching Jey walk backstage.

“Go, pay the bill, I gotta use the bathroom,” I said giving her my credit card. Getting up I followed the path Jey had gone but discreetly.

I slowly pulled the curtain back and felt my blood boil as I watched him and Candice.

“I can’t believe this shit,” I muttered totally caught off guard with the scene in front of me.

“You know I get what you sayin’ and all, it’s just gon’ be hard not to kiss you when I want to,” Jey said as Candice laughed against him.  She blushed, she used to be this way with me, and now she’s lovin’ up on my fucking cousin.

“Who said you couldn’t?” she said pulling away from him as Jey moaned at her words.  I’ll fuckin’ kill him…..

What the fuck is happening, I mean I know I fucked up, but we always found a way to work shit out.

“So, what you sayin’ beautiful?” Jey asked, leaning her up against the wall towering over her. I saw Candice looking at Jey like she was ready to fuck him right there as she pulled him closer standing on her tiptoes.

I held my breath waiting to hear her response.

“It means It depends on your answer to my question. Can I love you in slow motion Joshua?” she whispered against his lips as Jey took her in a passionate kiss.

I couldn’t take it anymore just as I was about to interrupt the love fest I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder.

“Joe what are you doing?” Trin asked as I turned towards her having seen enough.

“Uh, nothing Sasha and I are about to head back to the room. I thought this was the bathroom but I was wrong,” I said trying to keep my face unbothered as she moved me to the side and peaked behind the curtain seeing Candice and Jey still in their own world kissing.

“Joe, let her be, she deserves to be happy. You’re with Sasha and god knows who else, why can’t she have someone,” Trin whispered as I growled….

“Not with him, Trin!” I hissed as she jumped slightly at the harsh tone of my voice. “Not with my fuckin’ cousin, I can’t let that shit slide,” I said angry more at myself than Jey if I was really honest with myself.

“Joe, she has a right to move on with her life. It’s been a year,” Trin said as I turned and began walking away from her. “She’s mine and I ain’t gon’ stand for the disrespect,” I said trying to get away as fast as I could from her nosey ass following me.

“Joe!…. Don’t do anything crazy!” Trin shouted as I waved her off storming past Jimmy completely ignoring him.

“Who the fuck, does he think he is?” I muttered seeing Sasha by the door. “Hey, what’s wrong baby,” she said trying to touch my arm as I snatched it away.

“Not now, let me take you back to the room. I ain’t in the mood tonight alright.” I said walking past her and putting on my coat.

“Well, what crawled up your ass,” she said as I turned giving her a murderous glare. “Look, you can either get in the car or you can stay here and find your own way back,” I said as she rolled her eyes.

“I know that girl Tiffany that you cheated on Candice with does everything you ask because she’s desperate, but I ain’t the one, Joe. She said as I sneered at her invading her space.

“Fine, stay yo’ ass here, and don’t call me again,” I hissed walking away from her.

“You gon' end up alone Joe because this Tribal Chief shit has gone to your head and has brought out the worst in you. What happened to you?!” She screamed as I continued walking away, ignoring her.

I didn’t need any damn lip from her, I’ll call Tiffany and get her ass back in rotation after I get Candice back where she belongs.

----

Trin’s POV

“Where the hell big Uce come from?” Jimmy said as I sat down beside him. “He was spying on Candice and Jey. Jurdy, he just saw them kissing,” I said totally worried now.

“Ah shit, well that ain’t good, warn Candice. I’ll try to get Uce alone,” Jimmy whispered as he pointed at Candice and Jey who were on their way back to the table.

“Hey bestie,” Candice said sitting beside me as Jey kissed her cheek. “I’ll get you a ginger ale,” he said as Jimmy looked at me. “Uh, I’ll go wit you Uce,” Jimmy said following Jey.

“What’s wrong with you? Candice said looking at me as I sighed. “Girl, Joe knows about you and Jey,” I blurted out all at once as she looked and shook her head. “Trin, I ain’t worried about Joe and what he knows. I’m with Jey and there’s nothing he can do about it,” Candice said as I hoped she was right and Joe would cool off and let her be.

Jimmy’s POV

What you gon do Uce i asked as Jey rolled his eyes at me.

"Well I’m glad he saw us, he shouldn’t have been nosey. I ain't hiding how I feel about Candice anymore," I said not caring that he knew.

I wasn’t going to hide Candice, she deserved the world and I was going to give it to her. "I want ya’ll both happy Uce. Just be careful, Jimmy said as we waited on the drinks.

"I'm always careful twin, I got this I," reassured him. Nothing Joe had going on was gonna spoil my night. I had my girl, my career, man everything was perfect right now and I was gon' enjoy it no matter who had a problem with it.

----------

Hilton Hotel

 Atlanta, Ga

Joe’s POV

“Hey, um I was wondering if you could help me?” I asked the desk clerk who seemed to be a fan as to how she was smiling all dreamy at me. Yes, this will be a piece of cake.

 “Sure how may I help you? she asked as I smiled at her turning on the charm. “Yes, I’m in room 541 and I somehow deactivated my key. I’ve been trying to call my wife to let me in but she seems to have fallen asleep” I said as she began typing.

“The room is in my wife’s name it’s Candice Jones,” I said giving her my ID. After a few minutes, my attempt at getting a key to her room was a bust.

 “Well unfortunately there Is nothing I can do for you Mr. Anoa’i. Especially since I see you also have a room in your name on the seventh floor. Also, your name isn’t listed as a guest in room 541 either,” the clerk said as I tried to remain friendly.

“Oh, yea my wife and I always book an extra room, almost like a decoy for fans sometimes. It’s hard for us to have privacy sometimes,” I said rolling the lie off my tongue hoping she would buy it.

“I’m so sorry you guys have to do that. It’s really sad but in order for me to give you a key to that room I would need your wife to come down and give permission for you to get a key. We also can do a wellness check with security if you would like,” she said as I frowned. No, I want the fucking key.

“Uh, that’s ok I’ll keep calling her. I’m sure she will open the door soon,” I said stalking towards the elevator. Damn it! I needed to see Candice, she can’t do this to me…Not with him…No.

-----

Hilton Hotel

Jey’s room

Candice’s POV

“Shit, let me open the door baby.” Jey moaned as I kissed and nibbled on my neck. “You been teasing me all night lookin’ sexy as fuck with all this red outfit on. I can’t control myself,” I groaned, gently biting his neck before swirling my tongue over the sensitive area as he growled.

“Fuck, well who am I to stop you? Damn, that feels so good, lose control baby,” he panted as I smirked against his throat.

“Mmm, you betta hurry up cause anybody walking by bout to see to me on my knees swallowing all dis' dick,” I moaned unsnapping his pants and sticking my hand inside caressing his dick.

 “Fuck, you wildn’, I love dat' shit,” Jey groaned as he finally got the door opened, ushering me inside.

“I want to taste you,” I whispered against his mouth taking him in a short deep kiss as Jey moaned, cradling my head as we explored each other’s mouths only pulling apart to catch our breaths.

“Are you sure? I know you wanted to wait, baby,” he said searching my eyes for apprehension as I smiled at him. “Take off your shirt,” I whispered pushing his pants and underwear down as he made quick work of his shirt throwing it across the room.

I felt my breath catch in my throat as I saw him in all his glory.  Growling Jey grasping my throat, attacking my mouth with his as I whimpered against him with need.

I wanted him so bad this whole waiting thing may have to wait. I needed him, especially with how put it down tonight earlier in that dressing room. I’ve been horny as fuck ever since.

I untied my wrap dress, pushing it off my shoulders, standing before him clad in my lacy bra and underwear set. Slowly I took them off giving Jey a show as he pulled me close to his chest.

His hands caressed my body as he looked at me with want and need.  “You so fuckin’ sexy, he moaned as I kissed him, caressing my tongue against his slowly as he growled with urgency as our tongues danced together as I pulled him closer.

“Shiiiit! I promised I wouldn’t rush you baby, but you makin’ it real fuckin’ hard Candice,” Jey panted as I smirked against his lips. Slowly pushing him against the wall, as I then kneeled before him.

“Mmhm, I see… It’s real hard Jey, I said seductively biting my lip as Jey looked at me in anticipation licking his lips.

Jey’s POV

“Shit, what you gon’ do about it, baby?” I moaned as she looked up at me innocently. Fuck that’s the most sexist shit I have ever seen.

“I’m gon’ give you what you been dreamin’ bout baby,” she moaned teasingly taking me in her mouth, gently grazing her teeth down my dick.

“Fuck, make my dreams come true and stop playin’ wit it. Suck dat' dick shit," I groaned as she took all my dick into her mouth slightly gagging. I then felt her throat relax around my dick.

“Ah fuck, you swallowed it all didn’t you baby,” hissed in shock looking down at her. “Mmhum,” she moaned as my hands went to the back of her head, her mouth vibrating on my dick making my whole body shiver as she worked me over. Damn, she knew what to do wit that sexy ass mouth.

“Got damn, that mouth, Ma,” I panted as her eyes meet mine as she continued to take me deeper and deeper.

“Yessss! Take it all in yo’ mouth baby fuck!,” I praised as she seemed to be on a mission now, sucking my dick greedily bobbing her head faster as I tried to not lose control and yank her ass up off the floor and fuck her against this wall.

 I could only see the top of her head as she was indeed giving me the best head I ever had steadily bobbing as I gasped trying to last as long as possible, but fuck her mouth felt so good.

“Look at me baby, I need to see you,” I gasped as she looked up at me. I almost came on the spot as her seductive bed eyes held me captive as she continued to please me.

I growled in gratitude seeing her this way, that slight arch in her back, her ample ass lookin’ like it was made perfectly for my hands.

Damn, dreams do come true if you wait patiently.

Candice’s POV

I have never wanted a man more than I wanted Jey right now. His eyes and moans tellin' the story of how good I’m making him feel. I can tell he was close.

I wanted him to know that I give as good as I get. He belongs to me now.

“I’m close, wait baby a second,” he moaned as ignored his pleas and began sucking him faster. “Damn, you tryin’ to make me cum ain't you? Shit, make me cum then, you can get all dis' nut baby, I faintly heard him whisper encouraging me as I continued to give him what I knew he needed.

Jey’s POV

“Here it come Candice,” I rasp cummin’ hard in her mouth, groaning as her mouth continued to milk me dry as I rubbed and caressed her back. “Fuck, I needed that," I moaned in satisfaction trying to catch my breath as my body relaxed.

“Are you ok baby?” Candice asked looking at me with a sly smirk, slowly standing up, swirling her tongue around her lips.  Groaning I closed my eyes. “I’m good…Yo', ass is deadly though,” I sighed as she laughed.

 “What are you talkin’ about, I just wanted to taste you and by the way you tasted yummy,” she purred innocently giving me a chaste kiss on the lips as I growled. “You playin’ a dangerous game,” I whispered deepening our kiss.

 “Mmm, I like playin’ dangerous when it’s with you,” she whispered as I smirked against her lips scooping her up and carrying her to bed. Yea, I could definitely get used to this.

Candice’s POV

I wanted him so bad but I said I wanted to wait but what was I waiting for exactly, we’ve known each other for years.

If it ended tomorrow, I would have no regrets and that was the honest truth. I felt safe with him and I knew he would protect me with everything within him and I really wanted him in this moment.

“Hey, where did you go beautiful?” Jey asked caressing my face as I blushed. “Just thinking is all,” I said looking at him smiling

"Aye, we ain’t gotta do nothin’ you don’t want to," he said reassuring me as I took his hand and placed it between my thighs as he groaned caressing my wet center.

"Does this feel like I'm not ready for you?" I moaned as he licked his lips, moaning at the words and the feel of my wet warmth soaking his hand.

“Damn you soakin' wet Candice, shit! Did I make you this wet baby?" Jey groaned in satisfaction never stopping his movements, rubbing my clit torturously slow.

 “Mmm, yes, you do this to me, It’s like I’m on fire,” I moaned not caring if it made me seem weak as we shared a breathless kiss as he overpowered all my senses. 

“Look at me Candice,” he commanded as I fought to open my eyes, the pleasure was too great and became more intense as our eyes met.

“I’m..I'm offering you me Candice, and you know what that is. I ain’t no Tribal chief, I’m just a man that loves you. A man who will spend forever showin’ you how special you are if you let me," he whispered as our foreheads touched.

I couldn't help but moan at his words and his skillful hands that were taking me to even newer heights of pleasure with each passing second.

I whimpered as he began thrusting one, then two fingers inside me as his thumb expertly circled my clit sending powerful tingles down my spine "Jey! Mmm, Oh my god!" I gasped as he silenced me with a kiss as I melted into him.

"Tell me what you want Candice?" Jey groaned as my heart leaped into my throat. Just say it Candice and take a chance.  

“What do you want baby?" Jey asked speeding up his movements as I pulled him closer.

"I want you," I whimpered against his lips as he closed his eyes groaning in satisfaction.

"I want everything that comes with it..... I want it all Josh," I moaned as I exploded in his arms.

"Baby, it’s right here, it’s always been Candice…All you gotta do is take it, baby," he whispered taking me in a passionate kiss, climbing between my legs as my orgasm continued to wash over me.

Jey’s POV

"I want you to make me yours," Candice moaned as I groaned, wrapping her legs around my waist. "Fuck, I’ve dreamed about this," I panted slowly entering her as we both gasped in shock and pleasure at the intense feeling of becoming one.

I stilled inside her as her tightness overwhelmed me as Candice grabbed my chain pulling me to her, claiming my lips in another kiss as I slowly began moving inside her.

"Fuck, you were made for me," I praised taking my time thrusting slow and steady inside her as I felt her tighten around my dick as Candice purred, her head thrown back in pleasure as I made her mine.

"Jey! Please, I need it she begged," as I growled taking her harder as she whimpered my name over and over.  "Who’s pussy is this Candice?" I moaned unwrapping her legs from around me, opening them wide as I went deeper inside her.

"Josh! Oh!  Baby! You know,"” Candice whined as I went even deeper. "Tell me, Candice," I demanded as she writhed in need below me.

"Yours! It’s yours Josh!" she screamed as I took us both over the edge. "Fuck yea it’s mine, and don't you forget dat' shit either," I groaned as she showered my dick with her essence.

"I love you so much," she moaned as I felt my heart swell, she loved me back.  

"I love you too baby," I whispered kissing her gently. All my waiting hadn’t been in vain. That alone made my dick hard as a rock again as I began thrusting inside her again as she gasped in surprise.

"Are you serious? Already?" She moaned against my mouth as I smirked. "Oh, Yea… you got me addicted to you Candice," I moaned as she clawed at my back.

I could faintly hear someone knocking on the wall. I guess we were too loud, but I’m sorry they are in for a long night just like Candice is.

----

Next door

Joe's Room

Joe’s POV

I guess I’ll try to talk to Candice later, that shit at the front desk was a bust. How could I get through to her and make her leave Jey.  

My thoughts were interrupted as I heard knocking on the wall and a woman moaning in pleasure.

Are you serious right now, I’m trying to damn sleep. I hit the wall giving my own message back to shut the fuck up but the headboard hitting against the wall didn't stop, hell it started banging harder on the wall.

"Damn, least somebody gettin' dick down good, I guess," I muttered as I heard the woman’s moan again....

"Wait…I know it isn’t," I muttered as I got out of bed and placed my ear to the wall waiting to hear the voice again.

I knew that moan anywhere…."Candice," I muttered as I could hear her clear as day.

"Jey! Oh, fuck you so deep!” Candice screamed as I jumped back from the wall in horror. "Yea, I'ma go deeper up in this pussy, fuck! Jey moaned.

"You got to fuckin' kidding me!" I hissed, putting my shirt, sweats, and shoes back on. I grabbed my keys, and phone before storming out of the room.

I couldn't stay there knowing what was goin' on next door to me.

I can't believe she let him have her....She was really having sex with Jey. The elevator ride to the next floor was torturously slow but I knew I needed a distraction to block out what I had just heard and Sasha definitely would do for now.

"Sasha open the door!" I shouted banging on her door. "Come on open up, I need some relief," I muttered to myself as she groggily opened the door.

"What do you want Joe?" she asked wiping the sleep from her eyes. "I want you," I said grabbing her in a rough kiss, leading her back into her room slamming the door behind me.

---

Jey’s Room

Candice’s POV

“Yeaa, bend dat ass over and lock them legs behind mine,” Jey ordered as he continued to fuck me with long, hard deep thrusts as I angled my body on the bed arching my back.

 “Oh! Yes, you deep in it! Oh my god!” I moaned as I heard Jey chuckle but quickly gasped as my pussy painful tightened around his dick. “Got damn, ma,” he panted keeping up his thrusts. 

“Yea, this pussy feels good don’t it," I taunted as Jey growled. "Shit yea, it do," he moaned. “Then don’t play wit it Jey, fuck me! We can go slow later, I promise,” I groaned throwing my ass back on his dick as he growled smacking me hard on the ass as I whimpered feeling the constant tingles exploding all over my body.

"I been waiting on you for years girl, I’ma enjoy this. Dat ass looks so fuckin good bouncin’ on my dick. You like how I’m dickin’ you down don’t you baby,” he moaned as I gasped trying to find the words.

 “Yes! I love it!” I exclaimed, with no shame. Shit, my man knew how to use his magic stick and that monster was all I imagined it to be and then some.

“Uh-huh, I can tell baby…You backed up that shit you was talkin’ out in the hall,” he groans. “You swallowed this dick and now you takin’ it all like the good girl you are.” he praised, grunting as we chased our next orgasm together.

“I’m your good girl, only your good girl,” I panted as I felt him slowing down as he growled. "Yea, you my good girl and only mine," his deep sexy voice confessed as I clawed at the sheets. What was he doing to me?

Jey’s POV

“Yea, dats it right there,” I groaned gripping Candice’s hip, pulling almost all the way out before snapping my hips hard bringing her down even harder on my dick. “Jey! Fuck!” she screamed. “Uh huh feels good don’t it baby?” I moaned watching my dick disappear inside her pussy as it pulsated around me.

“Yes, Jey, shit you..I…I,” she screamed grabbing the headboard for leverage as she continued to throw that beautiful ass back on my dick unable to finish her sentence.

“I know it, baby, I'ma take care of you, I promise,” I groaned feeling myself not very far behind her. “Jey….Jey… Oh, baby… Jey,” she moaned almost chanting, clawing at the headboard as my resolve snapped and I began taking her fast and deep again.

Candice’s POV

Oh, my God, my legs are jelly and he feels so good. I was so close when suddenly I found myself on my back with Jey towering over me.

 “I need something from you,” he moaned entering me again as I gasped wrapping my thighs around him, pulling his closer.

“What baby?" I asked gasping as he gently kissed me, "Tell me your mine," he I commanded as I smiled against his lips.

"I’m yours," I moaned as I felt myself about to come undone in his arms again. "I’m yours too shit, promise you never leavin' me,” he groaned as he continued to stake his claim.

"I won’t, I promise,” I moaned as our eyes never left each other. Everything seemed to become more intense by the second as I met his thrusts with anticipation

“Oh my god!” I gasped as he swallowed my screams with his mouth as I came hard.

“Good girl, you did so good baby, Jey praised me as bit my lip in anticipation of his release and still feeling euphoric from my own.

“Are you gonna cum for me?”  I gasped as I felt him getting harder by the second as he took me with wild abandon.

“Hell yea, I’m bout to give it all to you,” Jey moaned as I licked my lips “Mmm, I want you to cum in my mouth this time baby,” I begged as Jey growled at my words, biting his lip. “You do baby?” he gasped in shock as I nodded.

“I want every last drop,” I panted as he, quickly pulled out, leaning over, shoving his pulsating dick in my welcoming mouth.

“Ah fuck!" He shouted cummin’ hard as I moaned at the feel of his warm essence coating my mouth. Sweat fell from his brow as he tried to catch his breath. As his body relaxed, he pulled out of my mouth. “Ooouu shit, That was hot as fuck he praise as I smiled tiredly at him.

"Come on and let daddy see did you get it all baby," he whispered as I opened my mouth, releasing my tongue so he could see his essence on it.

As he watched me closely with hunger in his eyes, I closed my mouth and swallowed it as he grabbed my throat taking me in a possessive kiss.

“You gon’ end up barefoot and pregnant, you keep doin’ that shit, he growled against my lips as I laughed shaking my head at his words because knowing him it was true.

"Any regrets?" I asked as he pulled me close. "Hell nawl girl, you stuck wit my ass now," he said as I smiled at him. "You stuck with me too," I whispered settling into his arms as we finally found rest.

------

Smackdown

Candice’s POV

“Thank you so much so helping us out tonight with the photoshoots. This damn flu is getting everybody. But if I could I had one more favor to ask you,” Paul said releasing me from his embrace. 

“You know you good boss, and that I don’t mind helping. Jey was already scheduled for the show, so I was going to be here anyway,” I said as he smiled at me.

 “Yea, I heard about the new development, and good for ya’ll.  You both deserve some happiness,” he said as I blushed.

“So uh, what else did you need me to do?” I asked trying to change the subject.

“Oh! yeah, could you sing the National Anthem tonight? Samantha is sick so Braxton is going to announce for us tonight, but he sings like a dying cat,” he said as I laughed.

“Sure, no problem, I would love to,” I said as he sighed in relief.

“Thank you so much, now I gotta make sure these cameras are ready to go for the show,” he said looking at his paper quickly before rushing off, waving at Jey who was walking up.

“Hey, you! What they got you doin’ tonight?” I asked as Jey frowned. I’ma open the show and introduce Cody. Joe gon’ come out talking about why are we on his show, and exchange a few words, he said as I could see the internal battle he was having.

“Are you ok with that baby? I asked as he sighed, taking me in his arms. “I’m ok baby, and I don’t want you to worry yo' pretty lil head bout me. Joe and I both know how to keep business and personal separate,” Jey said gently caressing my chin.

"I sure hope so," I said as he gave me a chaste kiss on the forehead as I relaxed in his arms. Hopefully, Joe could remain professional, and the program would go smoothly. 

---

Smackdown

Jey’s POV

Ladies and Gentlemen, please rise for our National anthem Byron Saxton said as the house lights shined brightly on Candice as she began to sing.  

Standing there in Gorilla I couldn’t help but beam wit pride watching her in her element. My baby was truly talented, and the crowd was eating it up.

“She got them in the palm of her hand. I always knew she belonged on somebody’s stage; I’ve always told her that,” Joe said walking up to me to get a better view of the TV. “Yea, she really does, I’m proud of her,” I said not looking away from the TV.

 I don’t know the real reason for this small talk all of a sudden but I just hope he keeps this shit professional out there.

“Well let’s go tear it down out there lil Jey,” Joe said as I watched Candice wave to the crowd before she left the ring to go stand beside Saxton.

 Turning to look at Joe I scoffed at his attempt to get me off my game. “A’ight big Uce, I’m down, but if you go out there wit that lil Jey shit we gon’ have a problem,” said as he smiled at me.

“Well, why is that? You call yourself standin’ up to me now? Oh, i get it Candice got you feeling yourself, huh," he asked smirking at me.

 “Nah, Uce, I just ain’t the same scared lil Jey from when we was kids, and if you go out here throwing shots. I’ma get you…You feel me, I don't give a damn if this is a live show. I will rock yo’ shit, you understand,” I said watching the smile drop from Joe’s face.  

"Yea, I got you, Candice is off limits because this is about business," Joe said as I gave him a leary stare before walking away to go further to the curtain to get ready for my entrance.

I didn’t trust his ass as far as I could throw him. "Go kill it Uce, and keep your head in the game," Cody said as I dapped him up. "Thanks, see you out there, Uce," I said smiling as I heard the crowd as Saxton began to introduce me.

Candice’s POV

"Main Event Jey Usooo! Byron screamed as Jey’s music dropped and the crowd went nuts. Damn, there he goes I couldn’t help but feel a tingle down my spine watching my boyfriend. His ass knows what he be doin’ the guys are hyped and the girl’s panties are wet as fuck.

“Damn baby I see you," I muttered watching him bounce his body in excitement coming down the aisle. This was my first time watching his entrance live with the crowd and it was something to behold.

The crowd sang and bounced their arms in the air along with him. I was so proud of him; he really had made it. He came over to the ropes as Saxton gave him the extra microphone.

 I smiled at him as he winked at me before returning to the center of the ring. Damn it now I’m blushing. Get it together girl.

I hope the camera didn’t pick that up. That’s all we need is a post from fans asking who was Jey Uso winking at.

Before he could even start talking and introduce Cody, Joe’s music interrupted him. “What the hell? He was supposed to wait until Jey was about to introduce Cody and not run his ass out her before Jey could even speak,” I whispered to Braxton having a bad feeling as he shrugged his shoulders.

“Maybe they changed it," Saxton said as I turned to look at Jey. He was not amused as Joe made his way to the ring flexing with the title around his waist.

He spotted me as he climbed in the ring and ever so slyly, he licked his lips and smirked at me as Jey’s head snapped in my direction angry as I shook my head at Joe’s antics.

I looked at Jey and gave him a nod, encouraging him to keep his cool. He sighed, turning back to face Joe running his fingers over his face.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s a tense scene as this is the first time since Jey Uso quit smackdown that he has seen his cousin Roman reigns I heard Cole say.

“You can go behind me through the crowd and go to the back without anyone seeing you if you want,” Saxton whispered as I nodded but couldn’t move from the spot, I was stuck in.

Joe’s POV

“Lil Jey, what you doin’ on my show?” I asked knowing I was getting under Jey’s skin as I saw his jaw twitch. “I mean you quit! Cody got you signed to Raw. So why are you at my show lil Jey? I asked smugly.

 “Aye, I got a tag match tonight with Cody, I ain’t sweatin’ you Uce and It ain’t gon’ be too many more lil Jey’s a’ight,” Jey said rocking back in forth trying to control his temper.

“You always wanted to be me. When we were kids, I beat your ass in everything. Even now you still want to be me don’t you lil Jey? I asked as Jey frowned.

“Man, ain’t nobody tryin’ to be you Uce, I’m my own man,” Jey said frustrated as I laughed.

 “Nah, even to this day you always wondered if you measure up to the Tribal Chief.  You just seem drawn to things that you can’t have..That I won’t let you have,” I gloated laughing caressing my title as I saw the realization wash over Jey’s face.

He knew I was talking about Candice and I wanted him to know.

“Aye! What did I tell you?  Watch yo’ mouth before we have a problem," Jey said angrily pointing at me as I laughed.

 “Maybe I want a problem lil Jey, because it seems you just like takin’ things of mine that don’t belong to you. My precious, beautiful luscious things,” I said gently bouncing my title up and down on my waist my eyes slowly traveled to Candice.

Her eyes pleaded with me to stop as I could tell she was uncomfortable, but all things were fair in love and war.

Jey’s POV

This motherfucka lookin’ at Candice trying to be slick wit his lil words. If hints about her one more time, damn this show and staying in character, I’ma fuck him up. She’s mine now, not his.

Dropping my microphone low so nobody could hear, I leaned over and put my hand behind Joe’s neck, as he wore a frown almost outdone I lowered my microphone.

“I ain’t doin’ this bullshit wit you out here, But I promise you If you say her name out here in front of all these people, I’ma get you Uce..You gon’ have to see me,” I said deathly calm as Joe’s face contorted in anger mouthin’ words I couldn’t understand but I didn’t care.

“Now get back on script so I can go my way and you go yours, wit yo’ miserable ass,” I said wanting to finish the segment and leave.  

Candice’s POV

I can only imagine what Jey said to Joe as things were getting more tense by the second.

“You think you a big man, huh, Lil Jey? You can’t compare to me…This is all mine cause I’m the champ, I run this show! Joe exclaimed in the microphone gesturing to the arena.

This is my camera!” he yelled talking into the camera. Thank God they seem to be back on track with their segment. This had truly been a trainwreck thanks to Joe who was now at the commentator’s table.

“I own these commentators that talk about me and nobody else!” Joe yelled pointing at Cole and Wade before he slowly began walking toward Saxton and I.

“Aye, watch it,” Jey said seeing Joe coming towards us.

“I even own the ring announcer! I’m trying to get you to understand Jey everything belongs to me, and you can’t have it!” he said in his commanding deep voice almost making me jump.

I saw Jey getting out of the ring, heading towards us as I froze.

Joe now stood in front of me almost as if he was contemplating what to say as he bit his lip looking me over. Joe wouldn’t put me out here like that in front of all these people.

He knows how private I am about my personal life. He isn’t going to do this to me, he just wants to rile up Jey.

 “Candice…… Aulelei, how bout you tell lil Jey how I own every inch of you,” Joe bragged smirking at me as I slapped him before I could stop myself.

“You son of a bitch, I can’t believe you did this!” I shouted as Jey grabbed Joe’s arm, turning him around, punching him in the face.

Joe almost collided with me from the force of Jey’s punch. Thank god Saxton was fast-moving and moved me out of the way.

 “I told yo’ ass not to say her name!” I could hear Jey yell as they traded blows. “Somebody stop them!” I yelled as Paul Heyman came over to me offering a comforting arm. “Let’em fight it out sweetheart it was bound to happen,” he said as I groaned in frustration.

I didn’t want Jey to get in trouble because of me.  As they brawled back and forth backstage officials ran from the back.

The crowd was eating it up thinking it was part of the show.  “Let’s get you outta here, ok,” Heyman said gently guiding me behind Saxton as we made our way through the crowd to the backstage area.

Jey’s POV

“Jey, that’s enough!” an official yelled as I threw Joe onto the announcer’s table and pounced, punching him over and over as I felt someone lift me off of him.

“Aye, let me go!" I yelled as Joe charged towards me as we fell threw the ringside guardrail trading blows. "I’ll kill you!” Joe roared. “We need more help!” another official yelled as I felt like an untamed animal trying to tear apart my cousin.

You gon’ learn today, stop fuckin’ wit people.

Joe’s POV

“This shit ain’t over!" I yelled as Jey, and I were trying to tear each other apart.

“You damn right it ain’t cause every time you disrespect Candice, I’ma beat yo’ ass again!” Jey yelled as he got the last lick, kicking me in the face as security lifted us both up off the floor separating us.  

Jey held his hands up in surrender as security grabbed his arms leading him backstage. “Damn, his lil ass can hit hard,” I muttered regaining my bearing and grabbing my title as the crowd booed me.

“Shut up!” I hissed heading to the back wiping the blood from my mouth as several officials walked back with me.  

Candice’s POV

The backstage area was even more chaotic as a group security and officials were leading Jey backstage.

“What the fuck ya’ll all on me for! He been askin’ for this ass whoopin’!" Jey shouted pulling away from security.

“Calm down Jey, this ain’t helping, go check on Candice” Heyman said which seemed to snap Jey outta his rage as he came towards me. "I’m so sorry baby," he whispered taking me into his arms as I felt relieved he was ok.

“I’ll beat yo ass Jey that was so unprofessional! Joe yelled coming into Gorilla as I rolled my eyes at him trying to pass the blame like he didn’t do shit.

 “Unprofessional, are you serious? They shoulda’ let Jey whoop your ass some more because you deserve it with that shit you just pulled!” I hissed mad as hell as Paul stood up from the monitors and I could tell he wasn’t happy either.  

“Joe, in my office Now!” Paul shouted as Jey grabbed my hand as we stood side by side waiting to hear what our boss was going to say next.

“Candice I’m really sorry about all this, Jey take her back to her office, I'll handle this,” He said as Jey nodded before leading me away from the chaos.

Joe’s POV

“What the fuck do you need to talk to me about?" I asked shaking my mouth, tryin' to loosen up my jaw as I could feel Paul’s anger spilling off of him in droves.

“I need to see if I’m going to have you as world champion on this show, or if I’m going to vacate your title for that shit you just pulled out there with Candice and Jey,” he said his voice booming angrily throughout the small space.

“I’m sorry boss, I don’t know what came over me,” I said trying to smooth things over as he looked at me not buying what I was selling.

“No your not, my show is in the shitter tonight because of your selfishness. Candice feels violated, Jey’s pissed off , and I don’t blame him quite frankly.

“It wasn’t my intention boss, I just got carried away,” I said honestly wiping the last bit of blood from my mouth.

I knew I was going to have a black eye in the morning with how It was hurting but my pride was hurting worse.  

 “Because of the shit you pulled Cole is out there having to explain to the audience and the people at home how that wasn’t a part of the show and to respect everyone’s privacy at this time even though you brought them into ya’ll business Paul hissed.

Your right, that’s not how we handle business,” I said as he interrupted me.

“You jeopardized this show and put Candice in a situation she didn’t ask for. You damn right that ain’t how we handle business or what we stand for, so for the moment you’re suspended. Now get outta my building,” Paul growled walking off as I sighed looking around at the crowd that had formed looking at me in shock.

Damn, what is wrong with me...

Jey’s POV

“I’m ok Candice,” I said trying to reassure her as she looked me over. “I don’t want you to have to go through this type of shit because of me Jey, “she said trying to keep her tears at bay.

"Aye, don’t cry baby, I’m good, and it’s not because of you. This all on Joe,” I said taking her in my arms as she held on to me tight.

“This should have never happened,” she whispered as I comforted her.

I knew in my heart this blow-up was bound to happen wit Joe and in a way, I’m kinda glad it did.

Tonight, he found out I ain’t no punk and I fight for what’s mine. I don’t think he will be a problem anymore.

“I’ma talk to bossman right quick, then come back and watch you do your thing ok?” I said making her smile as I kissed her gently.

" I’ll be here waiting," she whispered letting me go as I opened the door, I came face to face with Joe.

“What you doin' here? What, you wanna go again?” I asked as Joe shook his head. "Nah, I come in peace," he said, sighing I allowed him inside, as I went to stand beside Candice.

“I just wanted to apologize to you both and tell you I’ve been suspended. I thought you should hear it from me,” he said as I looked at him really not knowing how to feel.

The silence became defining as I tried to find the right words to say

. “Joe, maybe the time off can help you clear your mind, and get stuff straight. All this stuff you’ve been doing isn’t you, and you better than this,” Candice said holding my hand as Joe glanced down at our intertwined hands and sighed.

“You really love her don’t you Jey?” He asked as I looked at Candice, then back at him.

“I always loved her, you know that Uce,” I said honestly as rubbed his hand over his face. He was fighting an internal battle I couldn’t help him with.

He had to let her go, she wasn't his anymore.

 “Are you in love with Jey, Candice?” Joe asked as I felt her grip tighten on my hand. “Yes, I am in love with Jey,” she answered without hesitation her eyes firmly on me as I kissed her hand.

“Well, I guess that’s it, huh," Joe said as Candice looked at him in confusion.

"Uh, Jey, take care of her, she's very special. And if you don’t,” Joe started as I interrupted him, “I’ll be expectin’ you Big Uce,” I said as he nodded and left without another word.

“Did he just do what I think he did?" I asked Candice as she seemed to not be believing what had just happened either.

“I guess only time will tell,” she whispered as Finn Balor walked in.

“Candice are you ready for me? he asked with a smile as she waved him further into the room.

“Yes, I’m ready, if you can stand over there we can get started,” she said giving my hand a final squeeze before going to pick up her camera.

 “Alright Finn let’s work,” she said laughing as he flashed her a goofy grin and began posing. I loved watching her work, but my mind was still on Joe…

I mean was it over and done like that or did he have something else up his sleeve?

I guess Candice is right only time will tell. But for now, I had my lady and that was all that mattered.

Taglist: @reci24 @southerngirl41 @vebner37 @jeyusos-girl

@melaninsugababy @romanreignkisser @bebesobrielo

@arination99 @2-muchsauce @bakugoumarianawrites

@empressdede @alyyaanna @christinabae @anonandwannakeepitthatway @venusesworld @jeyusosgirl  @theninthwonder

[kennycatchabreak]

the pregnancy story line has been useless in my opinion and just a reason to make a woman suffer

fatima thought she couldn’t have kids, so you give her a fake pregnancy?

like even if fromville as an entity is doing this for shits and giggles, it’s lazy writing…

if you wanted to get into body horror, the pregnancy wasn’t needed cuz you can lose teeth and eat rotten shit from high levels of stress

or since this is a supernatural place, she could have contracted the worms, entering a parasitic relationship where they’re eating her from the inside, controlling her to feed on rotting flesh/food simultaneously

is this all we have to offer women in horror/sci-fi? the fear of unhealthy pregnancy and not being believed? like what makes this more innovative than what already happens irl?

like atp have fatima turn into one of those mole faced bitches and have her and ellis navigate their love story. ellis has to keep his wedding vows to fatima despite her transformation and she’s slowly slipping away —no longer craving to eat but craving to kill for satisfaction, devoid of humanity. now ellis is tasked with reminding her why she loves him and the townspeople

hell this could set up a theory that the moles become evil cuz they no longer have loved ones fighting for them so they literally become hollow, bile filled creatures that used to be HUMAN

cuz there’s those scenes of smiley touching things and turning the steering wheel, then jasmine looking in the mirror almost somber to the fact that she kills for pleasure. like they were once people, what the fuck happened?

with creature fatima, she could go in the underground tunnels and we spend time learning about this mole community and who they serve (the entity on the colony house radio/liu house phone)

<><><>

also the whole “why doesn’t anyone believe me?” thing is tired now. we already did that with boyd but a writer obviously is tired of it too cuz marielle comments on that

we are in a supernatural town. anything coming out of someone’s mouth is finna be believe to me atp ( i swear to god by the time we get to randall’s cicadas, victor’s jasper and elgin’s ghost, i better not see another person question them)

the first time with sara was like “okay, strange. i can see why ppl don’t believe her really cuz so far this hasn’t happened.”

then boyd’s worm arm is like “leering on medical racism. the man needs help.”

now tabby and fatima is “no one believes women, especially woc”

let’s move away from this if you’re not going really tackle it. lets get to actually solving what’s going on with this freak ass town

what does jasper know?

who is kimono lady?

what’s up with bottle tree?

what’s up with the cellars?

what’s up with effigy cabin and the three red rocks?

where the fuck is the motel?

who is communicating to jim from the radio and phones?

who’s dead body is in elgin’s cellar?

who are the ankoohey kids?

what did julie, randall, and mari see?

why randall got cicadas?

<><><>

like lets wrap fatima up by next episode, deadass

she’s not pregnant so what is she? answer it now, so we can move tf on

or atp put her ass in the box for killing tillie along with acosta and let’s see if they take fatima cuz she’s special? or maybe fatima rips out the box herself?

also crazy how tabby is the only women moving the story forward meaningfully and not just having stuff happen to her and she react to it. she actively making decisions

i honestly advocate that fatima run and go find out what tf is wrong with her by herself. give her the reigns

<><><>

if i’m being honest this feels like a boyd redemption arc. fatima is going to go crazy and he’s going to have to save her because he couldn’t save abby for ellis

or ellis is either going to take boyd’s place in this situation and get a chance to save fatima, resulting in ellis feeling like he can’t put his full faith in his father to save everyone. so, he basically begins undermining boyd cuz if he can save fatima how come boyd couldn’t save abby?

or ellis is going to have to kill fatima, re-traumatizing both boyd and ellis, but especially boyd because he has to watch his son make the same decision he did

<><><>

but essentially fatima becomes a pawn to teach men a lesson while she suffers for no reason

tian chen’s murder already fulfilled that arc of “i can’t save anyone” because fromville via the creatures committing torture in front of him

and i’m not saying boyd should not have any lingering feelings about how he failed tian chen, but he shouldn’t be re-learning this lesson because kenny already gave him that reassurance of “there was nothing you could do cuz you’re human”

i hope this show doesn’t become boyd goes on the same journey to come to the same conclusion each time

and i hope they don’t keep using women to fulfill that

[baeklination]

Rural

Date: 231110

Warnings: SMUT 🔞, general fucking, fingering

Pairing: Baekhyun x F. Reader

WC: 4k

NOTE: Story 3 of Theme BAMBI. This is a soft one.

Masterlist

¤¤

Some days blue, some days grey, the mountains roll in the distance. Even when you get as far as farm country they lie farther still. Silent and never changing - a mystery that lends solace. 

Between them and here lies all you’ve seen in the world, but from the home where you grew up surrounded by golden fields and wind rushing through corn stalks to where you now live, on a very quiet edge of a very small town, it doesn’t seem so bad. In fact, with a little more than a modest salary you could save some each month and visit one of those big cities the ladies at the cafe are always talking about with so much shock and fascination…but it’ll keep.

If anything, what you would consider these days is a tour based on temperature; anywhere where it’s not scorching before the clock has struck eleven.

Scorching.

Scorching… 

“Rats..!”

Sticking the pin in the paper haphazardly you run down from upstairs to the kitchen, knowing you’ll be met by smoke billowing out from the oven - but you’re not. Saying a prayer of please, please, please, you grab a mitten, open the oven and pull out the cobbler. 

“Thank god..!”, you sigh, relieved to see you haven’t ruined the afternoon goodies you’ve promised Ms. Ethel to bring round before work.

Peering into the oven you see the culprit, a classic: edibles from a previous use turning into charcoal. 

“All in a day’s work”, you mumble to yourself, scraping the burnt piece away.

°

“Oh, you hadn’t forgotten about me”, Ms. Ethel chirps as soon as she opens the door.

“It’s not that late, is it?”

“Not for an old hen like me, but you ought to be on your way already. Or are you taking the day off?”

“The week’s just started, Ms. Ethel, I don’t need to rest just yet”, you smile at her on your way to the kitchen. “I’ll be on time. Either way, Ida has a key as well and I don’t suspect they’ll be breaking down the door on a Tuesday. Now, what do you think? Presentable?"

“I think the ladies will be fighting over it. I’m fighting myself right now”, she laughs, smacking her lips.

“Go on, have a bite. It’s best fresh outta the oven.”

“And serve a cobbler with a gaping hole in it? Oh, the jokes would never end, sweet girl.”

“Come now, Ms. Ethel. You don’t serve it whole. Cut it into pieces before they come and they’ll never know the difference.” 

“M-hm… Well, the cook knows best… I still have some coffee in the pot, it’ll go fine with a bit of sweet.”

“Go sit down, I’ll bring it.”

Having survived her husband of fifty-three years, Ms. Ethel is going on her seventh year alone. She says she isn’t lonely, and you reckon she mostly isn’t because she keeps herself busy with a visit here, a trip there all throughout her weeks, but nonetheless spending every morning with someone for fifty years is a habit you don’t wean off easily and that’s why you try to stop at hers a few days a week, to make sure. Suppose it is also for your own benefit. With your folks out on the countryside she’s become like a relative of sorts and being around her, doing little chores to alleviate her burden, is comforting.

Sometimes - like right now - seeing her sitting by the window, half smiling with curlers in her hair, she’s so cute it breaks your heart. You don’t know why exactly. It just does. But coffee and cake won’t wait for no one, so you snap out of it and join her in the living room.

“Here you go. Give me your most- second most honest opinion.”

“You never disappoint. If these hands of mine were still working proper I’d tell the ladies I was the baker.”

Lifting her spoon in cheers, she winks before eating it, and since it’s rude to wait for an evaluation you look out the window. Her view is almost the exact same as from your own, barring the houses farther down the street being visible here. You could tell the day was heating up fast on your way over, and the cat resting under the neighbour's tree tells the same story. A car breaks first the silence then your view; your heart skips. Shielded by the angle and speed, the frame is gone in the blink of an eye, but that's all you need - the tan arm, checkered shirt rolled up, holding the steering wheel of that red truck, is his.

“Mm!”, Ms. Ethel exclaims, bringing you back. “Sweet and deep just like I like it!”

¤ 

You’re a capable woman. A business owner - albeit small - making and mending clothes, paying rent on time, handling salary and meetings with your accountant by yourself. Even got your own house and home. But one hint of him and you turn silly. Knowing Baekhyun’s in town rattles your brain and instead of solely focusing on the job at hand you’re preoccupied with thoughts of how to see him. Should you head over to Joe’s pretending to need some electrical advice and hope Baekhyun’s stopped in to buy some new tools? Or the grocery store? The diner? You don’t want to be too obvious and get the folks talking - so maybe it’s best to stay put? Look as if you’re only minding your own and hope he’ll stop by and say hello. But what if he doesn’t? If you occupy yourself with something in the front part of the store, say fixing the mannequins or do a bit of sweeping you might see him across the road. Of course, one waves in such a situation - and of course, he’d be encouraged to come over…

This ridiculous merry-go-round occurs every time he's in town. Only a few times have you missed each other, be it because you were tending to a customer while he was loading up his truck or you stepping out just before he came in looking to buy a set of assorted buttons you know he didn't need.

Oh, but why is he such a fool? There have been times you know he’s on the verge of taking a step towards confessing, but being interrupted or simply not quite finding the courage he’d held his tongue. He’d smile and chuckle, squeeze the fedora in his hands before saying goodbye with a hint of sadness.

And while neither of you said anything it could be weeks before you saw each other again and sometimes you'd imagine that next time he wouldn't be alone. How uncomfortably the pit in your stomach sits when you think he might’ve been set up with a “nice girl” from there and you’ll find out about it on a regular day like this. Like the day the little bell over the door chimed, announcing his entry - accompanied by a woman you didn't recognise. He must have seen it then. How your stomach churned, making you too sick to even greet her with a smile. You knew it was all over, too late, on account of your own cowardice. And he must have seen how vigour was breathed back in your body when he explained how the woman had merely asked for directions; a visitor driving through town finding herself in need of a seamstress due to an unfortunate rip of her trouser leg.

Sometimes you acknowledge that driving the matter forward can't fall solely on him. After all, everything you've gained since you were seventeen has been by your own efforts and decisions. You've lived precisely as you've wanted to - with courage. So why is this so difficult..? If it were to end up a fiasco you'd barely see him anyway, right? 

Right!

But if it did end up a fiasco you'd still be wretchedly in love with him. Not giving him a chance to say yes also means he can't say no.

°

You saw him way across the street but of course put on a smaller act of coming out to give your little café set in front a wipe with a cloth - just in case.

"Hiya, Byun..! How's that crop 'o yours surviving..!", Humphrey, owner of a small shop for tinkers to the far left of you, jovially shouts.

"They're hanging in there, Mr. Thomas..!", Baekhyun calls back to him. When his head is turned a thin veil of sweat on the back of his neck glistens in the sun, carrying down the way under his shirt collar. Sympathizing with his situation of doing manual labour in this heat, you think how uncomfortably warm it must be under both flannel and undershirt. Before you're aware, the thought that he must have that film of sweat over his shoulders and chest comes into your mind. If his skin was touching yours…

"I'm sure your fabrics are doing fine as ever in spite of the sun?"

"Oh… yes. I guess I picked a good product", you smile, certain a flush is branding your cheeks, that he knows what you were thinking just now. 

"You have a long drive home, let me get you something to drink. Sit."

Going to the back of the store to fetch a bottle you take a quick look in the mirror and can determine your facial colour hasn't undergone any dramatic change. Thank you.

On your way back you stop for a second, mesmerized by the way Baekhyun wafts his hat in hope of some alleviation. The awning has gotten him away from direct sunlight but the heat is so pressing it's only a marginal change. He looks up from his seat when he hears the click and fizzle, and humbly accepts the bottle of Nehi soda. Gulping half of it down in one go he exhales loudly, the way all of us do after drinking carbonated drinks and tips the bottle in your direction.

“You're a lifesaver.”

“It's just a soda on a hot summer's day… So, are they? Your crop hanging in there alright?”

When it comes to Baekhyun, you're terrible at smalltalk, but luckily he doesn't seem to notice or leastways not mind. 

“I’m not in any peril just yet. I upgraded my irrigation system last season. Cost me a penny, but it's been worth it. You know how-” Stopping, he chuckles and knits his brows. “I'm sure this isn't the least interesting for you.”

“No… But it's all French to me…”

“Well, then, how's your folks doing? I think it's been a while since I saw their car passing out there. They move?”

“They're still out there. But my father took a tumble, so they've been staying in. On account of his leg.”

“Oh, that doesn't sound too good. Has he been to the doctor's?”

“Mm. It's broken. I'm going over on Friday to stay the weekend, do some work around there. If the buses start going again, that is…”

“I can give you a lift.”

And just like that, an opportunity like no other opened up.

“I’m sure you’re busy, I wouldn’t like to put you–”

“I always have time for you.”

°

To say your mind has been preoccupied elsewhere this Friday is an understatement. At times it seemed like time wasn't moving quickly enough. Other times it was moving too fast, no doubt a result of nerves. It was a tiny, white lie you told Ida about having tons to do before you depart and therefore would be locking up early, but she didn't mind either way - an extra few hours of weekend is nothing to complain about. 

The tons you had to do was to give in to vanity; change into a fresh dress, dab some powder on your face. The lipstick stayed in the drawer - you don't want to be too obvious. And not fully admitting it even to yourself, if Baekhyun sees you put some effort into it he might not wish to smud- anyway, your folks would wonder about the pageantry. 

You can’t help wondering if he really was planning on coming up here or if he made it up. Of course he didn’t make it up; driving all that way just for you? Maybe he would. He said he always has time for you. 

“I always have time for you…" 

Such butterflies go through your body when you think back on how he said it, so matter-of-factly, and you promise yourself that, if he doesn’t take the first step today, as the sun is your witness, you will.

You were ready forty minutes ahead of time and after sitting on the hallway chair for ten minutes you got so restless that you decided to step over to Ms. Ethel's. It was actually a good thing since she'd just done the laundry and hanging it to dry gave you something to do as well as it unburdened her.

You've learned to recognise the sound of his engine after all this time so he doesn't have to come into view for you to know.

"That will be your lift then?", Ms. Ethel asks when she sees your reaction.

"Seems it is. You're alright, nothing else you need? Trash to take out?"

"Go on, I'll make due. Say why isn't Mr. Byun married yet? A fine gentleman like him ought to have a wife, don't you think?" She's not blind. Her eyes twinkle when she opens the door and continues "Mm. And a fine woman like you should have a husband…"

You want to confirm what she already knows, share your secret, but now is not the time so you simply swat your hand smile.

"I'll see you Monday, Ms. Ethel.”

°

If smalltalk is one of your weaker points, then smalltalk around a subject is weaker still. All throughout the hour-long drive you spoke about this and that. Mostly memories from when you were growing up, the difficulties of Baekhyun having a different background than most, why you left, why he stayed and so on, but in the back of your head you tried to find an “in”, as they say. Some way to get talking about the two of you, but whichever line you had seemed contrived,  and plainly put: you were too scared. But when he offered to lend your parents a book about irrigation and new gadgets, you jumped at the chance, deciding that following him in under the guise of wanting to have a look at the old place, would create the perfect moment to tell him. Away from the road and him having to concentrate on driving was best anyway.

You take a few steps before realizing it's raining. Calling it rain is almost an overstatement. It's what you refer to as god's flower mister; rain so fine it feels like someone is using a giant sprayer from up above.

Baekhyun leaves the door open so you walk in, curious to see if it's stayed the same. It mostly has. Maybe a new kitchen table or sofa, you don't remember that well. It's only a minute until he's back with the book and it's too soon. You can't even find anything unnecessary to say, some remark about the place. 

“Do you want to have a look around?” He's awkward and fidgety. He's thinking the same thing as you are. “It's all the same, but…”

You're on the verge of doing it. Right there, with a lump in your throat. He must know what you're thinking. 

“Oh, okay. Well, then I think I know it already.”

You turn around and grab the doorknob, your lungs tight and pulling. Say it. Say it, say it, tell him! You know you can't do it. A coward.

It's over…

"Wait."

Baekhyun's hand goes to the door. Tentativeness like never before is painted on his face. You dare not move and ruin the delicate momentum. Sliding from the door to the knob, he takes your hand, holding it with the utmost tenderness…then bends forward and presses his mouth onto yours. A whirr goes round your head. His lips are so soft. Moving back he considers your expression then leans forward again, sighing out his relief just before your lips touch. Parting yours, you let your tongue slide onto, under his, feeling his hands gently close around your waist. This elation might not be emotional - if you were to look down you might see your feet hovering an inch off the floor, so wholly does the weight off your shoulders and happiness in your heart feel. 

During a moment's breath, Baekhyun glances at the stairs - a Freudian slip of the eye or a question? Either way you do the same then allow him to take your hand and lead you upstairs. 

It's just a short walk but nervousness, giddiness, impatience all fit in there.

The room doesn't look like you remember it from growing up, when it belonged to his folks, but neither does it seem like he's taken an earnest interest in the decor, not minding a frill on the curtains or flower pattern on the bedlinen. 

It's really happening. 

Amidst the softness of his lips you can't help noticing the fumbling of his hands against your neckline.

"I'm a klutz", he laughs shyly, leaving the dress buttons to you.

All of a sudden you become vulnerable. While getting undressed in the course of kissing follows a natural flow, taking your own clothes off with eyes wide open leaves you exposed and becomes somewhat of a revealing of your body. But you gather Baekhyun feels the same way, slightly turning as he does, to put his own garments on a chair. When the undershirt pulls up along his back you can't help pausing; his lean muscles are a testament to years of physical labour and carry on over his shoulders, arms and his torso. In front of you he's turned from the sweet man to infinitely alluring.

Oh…

You're glad that he's the one to remove your bra. After he's pushed the straps from your shoulders you let it fall to the rug beneath and his fingers whisper over your back; biding his time, perhaps waiting for courage. 

Then, you feel the touch of his palm as he puts it to your breast, as lightly as if you were made of glass, but daring to put some pressure on it once your lips meet again. Taking a few steps forward he carefully steers you to the bed where he pulls the covers aside for you to get in.

The hairs on his legs against yours with none, the press of his stomach on yours. Him. Stroking hair from your brow, he studies your face with warmth then smiles.

"I guess you've known for some time that I love you."

You take a deep breath, trembling because finally, it's been said. You nod, pull his head closer.

Under your fingers you feel the muscles on his back contract and relax with his small movements. By his fingers the hem of your underwear slips down to be taken off completely when you raise your hips. When he latches his thumbs under his own you're shy to look, as if being attracted to that part of him is shameful, but you are. He's hard, swaying, when he lies back down. Further opening your legs, he guides himself to your entrance amidst showering you with his lush lips; a hint of salt and imagined earth. 

On your slick coating he slides the head in with ease, distributing buzzes and whirls as moves.

"Uh……." His soft sigh over your face is a treasure. Pushing further in each time until completely lodged he whispers "Tell me if I'm going too fast."

His elbows frame you in and props him up, leaving only his stomach against yours as he softly claps with his groin.

Allowing you to sneak through with your arms you put your hands on the small of his back, feeling the billowing from below.

Pushing your leg up, he thrusts faster, resting his head on your shoulder so that his hair tickles your cheek. The gentle hums and moans are replaced by heavy exhales and short groans while he's coming closer to climaxing. Your insides swirl and twinkle. The evening hour doesn't matter - in this heat, sweat accumulates between your rocking bodies and mixes with the damp smell of a weathered house.

Panting hard, the quiver in his voice giving it all away, the clapping eventually turns irregular and unbridled, ending with his orgasm. 

His heartbeat is on fire - yours is too - and the heat feels strong enough to burn your chest, but even with the desperation for oxygen, his weight on top of you is a rapture unmatched.

Looking at his hands intertwined with yours you're struck by how well he's managed to keep them decently gentlemanlike in spite of his work. He's been perfectly still for some time now. Since he managed the mammoth task of moving his body to lay behind you. Just as you start listening for sounds of snoozing his nose feathers across your back, then he kisses the same place and unclasps his hands. Propping himself on the elbow, he puts his head against your arm and moves his hand over your stomach. 

"Do you think you'd like it if I…"

You feel silly not understanding what he means, especially if he's embarrassed to say the words, but you can't do anything other than wait for him. He huffs, bites his bottom lip and rolls you onto your back.

"If I…touched you…" Seeing the perplexion in your face he quickly wants to reassure you "We don't have to, it's okay. If you don't like-"

"No, it's not…" Truth is, in your limited experience with men, none of them ever did or asked to do something like it, so you don't know what it would be like if someone else did it. But you feel like you want him to. "I, um…"

The words wedge in your throat, but he understands you perfectly by the touch on his arm. Placing a dollop of saliva on two fingers, he lets them disappear under the sheet.

"Ah-h…"

You can't help catching your breath when you feel his fingertips run softly over your clit. Slowly lowering his face, he envelops your lips with his, pushing them in sync with his delicate movements. Up and down he caresses, then gathers some more liquid from below and rubs his fingers quickly from side to side.

Turning into the pillow, Baekhyun's face hovers over your side with anticipation so strong it's felt in his breath against your cheek. The whirr intensifies, coming up to the surface, your backside and thighs go tense, you press your hand on mattress, open your mouth…and just then the dam bursts, spilling over electric magic between your legs, inside you, while you shake and try to smother your whines. 

Baekhyun groans mutedly and repeatedly places kisses on the side of your face as he draws big circles with the new fluids.

You find him sitting on the patio, watching the sun between clouds in pinks and lilacs. There's not a sound except the grasshoppers so you almost don't want to go out for fear of disturbing this picture. The patio flooring is damp under your feet and only a tiny squeak here and there is heard, save from the swish of the blanket you've wrapped yourself in. Looking your way, he takes a deep breath and opens his arms for you.

“Hi there.”

“Can I ask you…”, you say, playing with his hair. “Why did you look so sad right before you kissed me? Surely you already knew?”

“But I didn't know. I thought. Suspected. So I thought, if I'm wrong and you turn me away, this might be the last time I see you.”

“But you're happy now. Right?”

“Mm. All I want is you and me.”

Looking at the sun you can tell what time it is, so you sigh.

“I think we have to get going…”

Finding his way under the blanket, his hands gently caress your waist, breast. Cupping your face, he presses his lips onto yours. 

“Once more before I take you..?”

●

[rzyraffek]

Alr yall Eddie Gluskin brainrot part 2 or something. ITS MADE FOR MY PERSONAL NEEDS TO VENT ABT HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM ALR DONT JUDGE scroll down for hyper important notes

Tw: eggie gluskin is his own warning, dub-con???(not really tho), erm eddie gluskin??? Ermmm idk yandere? A bit of nsfw (but there's warning beforehand) ALSO REQUEST OPEN FOR EDDIE SIMPS

Silly Eddie Gluskin headcanons

This idea is my personal one (so prepare). Imagine s/o in that spooky psych ward and she just hangs out around Eddie CUZ LETS BE HONEST HE IS THE SAFEST OPION OUT THERE😭 LIKE rest of people there bearly speak and would bite my toes off. Also I would totally get lost, so fallowing this dude is my best option

Tbh he at least pretends that hes nice😭

Also bro is mesmerised by her cuz 'shes not like other whores' cuz she doesnt scream or run away.

After he got attached (so in like 3minutes) he starts to fallow her like lost puppy and has dumb smile on his face for the whole time

He he w- he when he wh- when he- he when-

He is also very physical🥰 if he cant hug he holds hands, AND he talks a lot too... o my god

the only red flag is that he immediately wants to erm have babies 😔 BRO WANTS TO FUCK ON FIRST DATE😰🤯

Home boy 100% commits cannibalism THERES NOTHING TO EAT HERE ALR

Trying to escape WITH Eddie? Like acually from the ward? Say less

Beats up everyone, litteraly everyone. Somone stands near her in 50meter radius? They are totally dangerous mind if i stab?

Fatherless with attachment issues 👍🧍‍♂️

Loves when s/o sits on his lap, and loves being a big spoon. Litteraly melts when she grabs his hand

He 'invites' her on dates and makes some weird ass food (probably cooked rats) and if she refuses to eat he gonna grab that fork and force it inside her cuz darling you need to stay fed and healthy

He is very into domestic type shit, so if shes okay with becoming housewife he is flying away, blushing, kicking, screaming, begging for more. I mean he still would make her a housewife but its cute that she consents and he doest have to do all this threatening and manipulation stuff to make her do so

If she bakes cookies for him he will litteraly has one of those 'its so cute i want to squash it' moments and cup her cheeks and kiss all over (aggressively)

Believes in zodiac signs and tried to learn tarot once

She has to force him to stop using hair gel he looks like he has boat on his head

Looks like he smells nice but I doubt that

Kinda likes when she tries to run away? let's be honest I doubt that s/o was in love with him from the start, he is some random weird looking dude in hospital after all. So yeah he kinda liked (and still does) enjoy the whole prey/hunter thingy

ALR NOW NSFW TIME YALL CHILDREN LOOK AWAY

Lets start with obvious stuff, breeding kink, whole pregnancy stuff, likes his wife cute and obedient, but its kinda fun to chase her around once per few days, see her fear and panic o m g he loves that

He also fucks whenever he wants really, she has to have really good relationship with him to make him lisen and do what she asks him for (to some degree anyways)

Table, chair, wall, bed that he tortures people on, his bed, floor, any place is a good place to make some love

When he's not horny he is acually romantic (rare) he gives neck kisses, holds hands, talks about his plans for future, makes sure that stuff shes wearing and her hair is in good condition, bare minimum yknow

Also I use she/her and 'wife' stuff cuz even if s/o is the most masculine guy ever he is still cute lady in his eyes or something idc

My guy can do fast and rough or slow and deep. Depents of his mood really, if s/o annoyed him or he's just simply frustrated he will be rough, and do it no matter what she was doing, oh you were doing laundry? Not anymore, hop on this washingmachine, we are going on a ride. If he's in more romantic mood and s/o too, he will pick them up, kiss them, do it nice and deep to make sure that s/o feels everything

Tbh he loves 'hunting his prey (shes the prey lol)' prompt so much! Looking for her, feeling her fear... o my god this gets him going so hardddd

Bite marks on her, Hickeys on him

ALSO O MY GOD HER SITTING ON HIS LAP? omg imagine, s/o riding him, Eddie guiding her hips with hands HE DIES OMG YOIR SO CUTEEE

NOT ME WRITING WHOLE ARTICLE ABOUT EGGIE FUCKING GLUSKIN OMG IM SORRY😭 ALSO I was attacked by horse 2days ago and zapped by electric fence twice, just to buy a kebab, Im a survivor you all

[noones-untruly]

Your bitch is watching the second season of Blood of Zeus and lemme tell you, I don't like it. At least the very first 10 minutes. As I did previously, imma put here all of my thoughts regarding each episode as I watch, so beware of MASSIVE SPOILERS.

Also, small disclaimer: I'm not a professional writer, nor a movie critic. So everything here is my pure humble opinion so if you don't like it - don't read it.

So without further ado:

Episode 1:

Gods, it's been 10 minutes and half of the visuals (if not more) are just parts of the final episode of the first season. And also the plot didn't really moved past the point "yeah, Hades is the bbeg. Again." Although I sense some bits that it's more like "oh he's a misunderstood guy who did it all for love and whatnot" but the line of "Hera and Zeus made us fools and now we get to have our revenge" is already pissing me off. 10 minutes of almost nothing but being cliché. Not a good start, but imma give it a shot.

Another thing that irritates me is the "romantic" tension between Alexia and Heron. First of all, I don't get it how Heron is so good at fighting despite the fact that he lived with his mother and never really had to fight anyone with a sword. Like I get the arrows and such (tho hunting an animal in a forest and shooting a moving fucking warrior on a bloody battlefield seem kinda different, but aight, I'll let it slide). But how in the fuck after a few days-weeks of training with Zeus he manages to be so fucking op in the battle that it impresses an Amazonian Fucking Warrior Lady that spent at least half her life perfecting her martial skills?? This guy was not a warrior to begin with, how is he so good at killing people and demons?? He was BULLIED AND HAD NO ONE TO TEACH HIM KICK BALLS! So anyways, I don't like that it's implied that Alexia is falling in love with Heron. No, she's a powerful ass Amazonian, she's supposed to be COOL AND NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH THIS WIBBLY WOBBLY HERON THAT HADN'T EVEN LIVED FOR MORE THAN 20 YEARS!!! Like, c'mon, how old is he? 17? 18? He maybe has a body of a perfect athlete, but he's a fucking baby... And don't tell me Alexia is below 20, she's in her late 20's AT LEAST, cuz ain't no way a 20 year old is commanding an elite squad in ancient Greece. So no to Heron×Alexia. Not on my watch.

Also, what the fuck is elusinian stone and why are we supposed to care whether Hades gets it not?

What the fuck did they do to Hestia's and Athena's designs?? Like what the honest fuck is this bullshit?? Who do winged dead eating demons look more interesting that obviously very important characters?? Also, the scream Hestia lets out burning the demons away from her 💀💀💀

NO, NOT THE PROPHECY TROPE, PLEASE, NO

Why does Gaia look like she stepped out of a marvel movie...?

Episode 2:

Alexia, girl, why are you sleeping in full armour?? Also what happened to your face??

Heron, what happened to your face?? Did they ever give proper character references to the animators??

Also, why is Heron having a mental breakdown over some noname bro that killed their mother??

Bro, why are you so suddenly questioning gods?? (Ye, he should question who the fuck these gods are to rule over humanity, but it's smth he was supposed to do in the previous season, not now when he beat the shit out of his step brother in the name of gods)

Yay, my babygirl Seraphim is still here, serving cunt as usual 💖 And fuck yeah, eternal judgement >> serving gods!! Slay babe! (I am kinda ashamed for this passage, but I won't apologise for it)

Bitch what. A love interest? FOR MY MURDEROUS VENGEANCE LED BABYGIRL?? ARE Y'ALL KIDDING ME??

WHY DID YOU SPIT LIKE THIS?? PEOPLE DON'T SPIT LIKE THIS, SWEETIE. DEMONS TOO BY THE WAY

Ok, I understand the lack of colours for Hades, he is kinda gothic, but why is Persephone such a goth chick?? She's the goddess of spring and such no?? Why'd she wear black fucking lipstick and look like a depressed teen??

What in the Hades the game is this?? Listen, I didn't want to bring the game into this discussion, but you did it yourself, netflix. Y'all are not ready to be compared to the supergiants' masterpiece. Don't drag Zag and Melinoë into this, y'all are not on the same level of deepness into the greek mythology to have them here.

Seriously? The same punishment as Loki? Y'all ain't even creative. Don't tell me this bitch lover of Sera is gonna stay there with a cup to "help with the pain"

Bro, stop it already with y'all's "well I've always tried to help you, I'm not like the others" it's not gonna cut it anymore

So like, Hades was very hot and you redesigned him into edge lord? Ok.

Ah, so now you explain us about the elusinian stone and why it's so important, at the end of the 2nd episode? Thanks, cool.

Episode 3

Apollo is still serving. By now you should see the pattern of what men I like.

Drop it with the love interest for Seraphim already. I don't believe that a murder machine like him is able to fall for a simple mortal woman. Like this fuck would even care for anything else than his revenge. Well, tbh I didn't believe that he'd care for his biological mother either, so... I just don't like how they portrait him as a weak for love bud. Isn't that a bit unrealistic for a mass murderer with no empathy? Like ain't one supposed to be empathetic to love? Ain't one supposed to feel nothing when killing a shit load of people with no remorse whatsoever? Isn't there some psychological repercussions? No? Ok.

Lmao, suicidal Hades is something new.

Yeah, ofc, let's make Hades seem like a creep again...

Is that weird that I'm more attracted to the demon Seraphim more than to his human form?

Honestly, I'm so tired of media portraying Hera and Demeter as hysterical bitches that know no boundaries. Like come up with something new.

Lol, Hades just made my man enter into an invisible wall to make the wall disappear a second after.

Aren't you supposed to win over his trust? For now you're just venting about your shit ass family to a man that has no family at all. Not very kind tbh

"Look at her! Look at how she suffers!" Meanwhile the girl is just sitting on the ground bumboozeled that the god of the dead and some hot demon guy are looking at her talking some nonsense.

Why, of course she's not gonna suffer ugly like the other wraiths, she's the main hero's love interest, so that's why she looks like she's on some heavy tranquilizers

Yes, of course the prideful demon Seraphim, the murderer of guilty and innocent, the vengeful spirit will succumb to be a pawn in god's hands once again, only to alleviate the suffering of the soul of his beloved! What a bunch of horseshit, guys... I may be delusional enough to be attracted to that man and call him babygirl, but even I understand that this fuck is incapable of love. This isn't his character, it was done to just make him into the "good guy that was just too miserable so he caused a lot of pain to the others". Let's be fair for a sec here, he's a mass murderer, he deserves no forgiveness. Yes, he can be redeemed, but it's a long fucking process, that doesn't always include forgiveness, but a shit load of work and reflection. And therapy. Hades could've "tempt" him to join forces by manipulating his pride and desire to be free, to be above gods. Not love. Love can be ugly, love can be beautiful, love can be an instrument to redeem someone, but by gods, stop using it on every Joe to make him into hero, it's just stupid.

Sera, why are you so easy to manipulate??

Episode 4:

NOOOO, WHY DID YOU TURN HIM HUMAN AGAIN?? BRING BACK THE DEMON LOOK, IT WAS SO GOOOOD!!!

Off topic, but wasn't heron impaled in the middle of his chest? Why's the scar on his tit?

I can't, Aphrodite clinging to Ares's arm 😭😭😭 Stop with itttt!

Okok, one good thing: I like how in the games Heron is drawn to always be in Ares's shadow. A bit on the nose, but I appreciate the symbolism.

Apollo's refusing to compete with Ares?? Apollo?! You're making me laugh.

There's this background god with blueish skin and black wings and I cannot, who are they?? I have to know whom I'm falling for. Is that Thanatos??

Hm, so half the season is wasted on some weird intro to the story itself? Cool. Wow. Never seen that happen.

Episode 5:

You serious? The mighty Zeus, the king of gods, is judged by mere mortals? The pure-blood god, not a bastard child ascended to godhood, but the child of Rhea and Kronos, is judged by some mortal and has to go through the same path as any other human?? Y'all aren't serious. I can't. This is idiotic.

Hera, I don't believe you, that now, all of the sudden you're changing your mind and vouching for Zeus, that he's not that bad. Girl, you unleashed a whole ass box of giants to kill that man just a few weeks ago, why such sudden change of mind??

Zeus, how in the fuck you managed to build a whole ass knowledge bunker under that shabby house of your son without anyone noticing?? Please, share the secret, I also want to be capable of that

Greatest quote of the greatest man in these series, Evios: "Look, I'm alive for two reasons: I was born and I hadn't died yet."

Oke, I can understand why Sera might've fallen for the priestess in a normal situation (if he hadn't been fucked up beyond repair, that is). She's smart, she's beautiful, she's compassionate. A perfect woman, if she had any character to her. But my man is, unfortunately, beyond salvation of any kind, when he met her, he wasn't recovering from the hatred, he was driven by it. How can one love another, when one is fueled by hatred and anger? How can one love, when one had long forgotten what is it to be loved? How can one love, when one is no longer feeling?

Episode 6:

I suddenly like the Heron's arc. Is he gaining some depth to his character? Wow.

Lmao, Sera, you fell from gods know what height and you're still in one piece and not smushed into the ground and around? You are a solid rock of a man.

Ok, maybe Sera is slay in his human form. It's just that he needs to be dressed appropriately. Stop walking around with tits out in and wearing this stupid furry mini skirt and he's looking like a decent man.

Icarus?? Sera, choose another pseudonym, this ain't a good one.

Honestly, I'm kinda digging all that "Demeter, the great mastermind " vibe. Slay queen! Love it for her. She's a bitch in this scenario, but damn she's good at it.

Episode 7:

Y'all, I'm in love with Demeter. This bitch? The bitchiest of them all. Slay 💅

Alexia, girl, how did you survive Talos exploding?? You demigod too? And that big fella who's name wasn't mentioned once this season is he also the same or just explosion-proof?

Ah, yes, his name is Kofi. Could've guessed.

Bruh, you've already done Alexia wrong in this season, why open her character like that in under a minute?? 😭 Opened and immediately closed. Feels like "That's rough, buddy" from Zuko but make it lvl 99 of idgf

And now you're Nobody?? Babe, you decided to fuck with mythology, didn't you? Bad idea.

Also, hadn't Kronos had another design in the beginning, no? Then who was that cosmos looking titan in the beginning?

Wait a moment. Does Sera classify as a demigod? Like, he is partially giant, cuz he ate flesh of one. And he possesses a ton of demigod-like qualities. Could it be that he's the prophecy demigod? Meh, I'm too lazy to look for the prophecy to compare it and actually find out. Will see in a moment what happens.

Episode 8 (finally):

Sera is getting sexier with each challenge.

Heron, surprisingly, is too, getting more attractive.

I absolutely hate Gaia's design. Disgusting.

Lmao, I was right, there's a possibility for Sera to be the prophecy child.

Oh my, are you serious, Hera is a pacifist now?? Y'all are crazy.

This is just a massive slaughter house at this point, gods, what the fuck.

Aw, the brothers are helping eachother in this butchery, how cute.

Heron, chill your ass, you're about to explode.

Btw, where's Evios? And that interesting associate of his.

So, what's that terrible horrible monster whose name we do not say?

Oops, someone pissed off the primordial Gaia. Y'all are fucked. Btw his name's Typhoon. Meh.

In conclusion:

The majority of the script is shite. Some (almost all) of the arcs can be done so much better. Designs suck an ass too. But did I enjoy watching it? Yes. Is it because of Seraphim? Primarily so. But will I wait for the 3rd season? Absolutely yes.

So I loved and hated the show at the same time. The main line is quite interesting nevertheless, so see y'all when the 3rd season is out.

I have a shit load of stuff to say on addition, but this post is long enough in it self, so maybe later.

[minimag1c]

Ending the radioapple trick or treat week with angst woops

Beware of the moth

Day 7 ----->ᶠʳᵉᵉ ᵈᵃʸ

2p universe but with a twist!

Man I can finally die in peace, don't even fucking care if it's short or doesn't have any sense or whatever I'm glad it's over and complete now holy moly-

Hum anyway- enjoy some tragic yaoi radioapple and monstrosity Agatha because again, why not.

•• <<────≪•◦⚜◦•≫────>> ••

This was so fucking bad and Samael knew that.

Actually, it was already bad from the very beginning. Ever since his 7 siblings had fallen from grace because of their transgressions against the above. Ever since Lilith went missing after a huge argument between her and the heavenly council with him being painfully and obviously against his own spouse. Ever since he had a strained and tumultuous relationship with his daughter Charlie. Ever since said Charlie befriended herself with that weird suspicious nun named Agatha whom he clearly didn't trust.

And ever since he became close with this god-damned Abdiel.

Samael was aware that, at first, he knew this deer only because of this- what was it again- the whole rehabilitation center-? Something along those lines. A project that unified both Heaven and Hell in which Charlie was unfortunately involved with this damned Agatha and two representatives from Hell, a sinner and a hellborn.

He himself, obviously, was not interested in it. First because he was not only part of the heavenly council but also the only remaining virtue and second whatever the purpose of this- whatever this was- was definitely not for heaven's advantage, meddling the holy realm with the most depraved one.

But Samael couldn't bear himself, surprisingly, to actually get in the affairs.

Because again, it's for Charlie and if she realized that the person who is against her new job is her fuck ass annoying and tiring dad, the heavenborn would have already lost it.

And as the remaining archangel, he couldn't just go around and fuck up with any winners nor anyone below his rank without having consequences on how people would perceive him.

And it was already risky. He started to get close with that damned winner Abdiel.

To be honest, if he had to be frank, that cyan deer was intriguing to him. So fragile yet he wasn't the type to just whine around and weep on anything despite being... Really emotional. He really had attachment issues and would easily get close to anyone who was nice to him. Luckily- what was her name again- Niko? Miko? Nuki? Something along those lines. Whatever. That short cyclop lady would, luckily for Abdiel, stay by his side to keep him from being hurt all over and so was Hery.

Somehow Samael could remember his name. He didn't know how but anyway.

In short, Abdiel was vulnerable. Abdiel was a meek doe with a huge bleeding heart and yet.. Samael has found himself getting a hook for him.

And it was so fucking bad.

Especially because Agatha seemed to have realized their closeness and became even more creepy than ever.

"I don't trust her at all." Samael accidentally confessed to Abdiel one day, while the two were on the highest balcony of the clock's tower, looking at the majority of Humility.

Abdiel's ear flicked at the statement as he looked at the archangel, curious.

"You mean..."

"Yes. Agatha. She's too shady to be a simple nun." Samael almost spat, gripping the rails of the balcony as his wings puffed up. Abdiel frowned and the archangel was thinking that the deer would do his little sensitive speech of seeing the good side of people despite their flaws or other shits like that.

"I do agree with you, she kinda intimidates me.." the winner eventually admitted, much to the shorter's surprise as Abdiel continued, his tail getting droopy like usual.

"... But I think we should still give a try to her and Charlie's project of redemption for sinners. Heaven has been empty for a while and Hell is dealing with overpopulation. Plus.." he stopped, looking away as he frowned and Samael would have guessed that what he was going to say would make him weep.

And boy he was right when Abdiel continued.

"Well- not everyone we knew are actually here and- a-and-"

"You're thinking about your mother aren't you." Samael guessed as the deer bleated in surprise before composing himself.

"Technically uhm-!" he tried to come up with something but then sighed in defeat. "Y-yeah... I'm thinking about her."

An awkward silence filled the air before Abdiel continued, his tone shakier.

"The last time I saw her was when I got mistook for another serial killer and executed without a trial." He started and Samael restrained himself from growing eyes all around in anger at the injustice of his death. "She was... Really amazing. To say the least. The pillar of my life and the one who taught me everything. I already know she isn't here. It's obvious it has been decades since she died b-but.." he fought the emotions that were stirring inside him as he continued, his words heavy. "She really deserves a place here. She's a tough woman, the kindest I ever knew and she went through so much. Her place should be and yet-" He breathed heavily. "-and yet even Saint Peter didn't see her name written in the book. Nothing! It's impossible she should-!"

"Hey Abby-" Samael started as he took Abdiel's hand and squeezed it. "-I know it's hard but you need to breathe. You're gonna have an emotional meltdown." The archangel tried his best to not sound like a robot nor neutral as if he didn't gave a damn before he tried to soothe him. "It will be okay. No need to feel horrible, it's not your fault."

Tears threatened to spill but Abdiel quickly and violently wiped them before they even had the chance to appear as he sniffed. "I-I just want to see her-"

"And you will." The virtue affirmed, taking Abdiel's cheek as he made the winner looks at him, trying to flash a non threatening smile. "If this project of... Your friends work then I can assure you, your mother will be here."

Despite him being awful when it came to reassuring others or giving pep talk, Abdiel couldn't help but slightly smile back at him, squeezing his hand in return. However, he couldn't help but ask, his voice barely audible.

"Are you sure-?"

It tooks Samael a few seconds before he wrapped his six wings around the taller's body, closing his eyes. "It's an affirmation and an omen. You will see her again."

Abdiel could only hum in wonder.

•• <<────≪•◦⚜◦•≫────>> ••

Samael hasn't seen golden blood for a long time. The last moment he remembered being even covered with it was when he had to banish his 7 siblings after the millennial war.

And when he saw the ripped off wings and antlers that laid below his feet, in a sunny puddle of grim and viscera, it felt conflicting and stomach churning.

"Ḧḕ ẇḀṠ ḠḕṮṮḭṆḠ ṆṏḭṠẏ ḀṆẏẇḀẏ. ṖḶṳṠ ḧḕ ẇḀṆṮḕḊ Ṯṏ Ṡḕḕ ḧḭṠ ṁṏṮḧḕṙ ḊḭḊṆ'Ṯ ḧḕ?" Agatha's distorted voice rang out, her long thin needle-like fingers slowly crawling on the archangel's shoulders and it tooks him all of Samael's willpower to not snap those sticks one by one.

"I hate you." He gritted through his teeth, surprising himself with the amount of poison and anger cursing in his words.

Agatha only smiled, her grossly stretched mouth taking literally half of her face as she approached furthermore the archangel, her long neck snapping and cracking at each movement while she looked at him, multiple eyes filled with glee.

"Ẏṏṳ ẇḕṙḕ Ṯḧḕ ṏṆḕ ẇḧṏ ḊḭḊṆ'Ṯ Ḋṏ ḧḭṠ ḊṳṮẏ ẇḕḶḶ ḀṙḉḧḀṆḠḕḶ." She argued back before squeezing Samael's body who somehow felt frozen, unable to move before she continued. "ḞḭṙṠṮ ẏṏṳ ḊḭṠḠṙḀḉḕḊ ẏṏṳṙ ḊḀṳḠḧṮḕṙ-"

"Keep Charlie's name out of your fucking filthy mouth you bitch!" The archangel snapped at her, letting out his six wings while his own angelic form appeared out of fury. However, Agatha didn't bulge as she continued, still grinning like a deformed Cheshire cat before chuckling darkly. "-Ṇṏẇ ẏṏṳ ṖṳṮ Ṯḧḕ ḃḶḀṁḕ ṏṆ ṁḕ ḃḕḉḀṳṠḕ ẏṏṳ ḲḭḶḶḕḊ ẏṏṳṙ ṏẇṆ ḶṏṼḕṙ"

She then got closer, using her finger to lift up Samael's chin who was still shaking albeit it wasn't out of anger only.

Remorse.

Dread.

𝙁𝙚𝙖𝙧.

Because she was 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩.

𝙃𝙚 𝙠𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙙 𝘼𝙗𝙙𝙞𝙚𝙡.

"Ḭ ḕẌḉḕṖṮḕḊ ḃḕṮṮḕṙ ḟṙṏṁ ẏṏṳ ḀṙḉḧḀṆḠḕḶ." She said, shaking her head in disappointment before slowly shifting into a less gruesome form as she still smiled at him before going away. "But again, knowing you, it shouldn't be that surprising anymore." She concluded.

Not before she vanished, she muttered an order among the lines of "cleaning the mess" then disappeared in a tornado of butterflies.

Samael only collapsed on his knees and painted his already bloodied hands with Abdiel's, weeping silently.

•• <<────≪•◦⚜◦•≫────>> ••

Did that even made sense? Noooo

But am I just happy that I've finally finished this shit? FUCKING HELL YEAH

Uhm- thanks for reading my garbage I suppose? I swear if I knew how to time my writing well I thought I could do better and yet here we are so uh

Anyway

Thanks for the support everyone

N E V E R A G A I N I ' M D O I N G A W E E K P R O M P T

ÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆÆ

Yeshua I'm tired.

Meow.

[31/10/2024]

(1572 words)

----

Wattpad version

Archive of our own version

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Horace

Prompt fill for "a last minute emergency means they have to bring someone else with them on the date (e.g. child, little sibling, pet)" from here featuring Modern AU Beatrice and Zevlor...and Horace the corgi. SFW.

Special shoutout to @notyournhaama for continued support and choosing the prompt!

Beatrice: Hey Zev, turns out my roommate fucked off for the weekend and since my mum is away, I’ll need to bring Horace on our date. Is that okay? If not, that’s totally understandable and we can reschedule for another time.

Zevlor: No problem at all. See you tomorrow. <3

Beatrice: Thank you so much! See you then <3

***

“Ah, so that’s the famous Horace.” Zevlor teased as Beatrice and her corgi Horace approached him at the entrance to Bloomridge Park. This was their fifth date, for which he planned a romantic picnic in what he discovered to be her favorite park in Baldur’s Gate. My goodness, she looks stunning. What a pretty lavender sundress she’s wearing that shows off all her…assets. He glanced at the corgi and offered his hand for the dog to sniff. I see I meet with his approval. Good, good. I do so very much like your mistress, Horace.

Beatrice was beaming at the two. “Aw, you two are adorable! I’m sorry about—”

He met her gaze and smiled affectionately. She’s blushing! She’s truly the sweetest. “I told you---it’s not a problem, my dear. I even packed a treat or two for a certain good boy.”

Her brown eyes widened as she took the arm he offered her. “You didn’t have to! Now I feel bad. I can reimburse you, if you want.”

Like Hells you will, darling. “Bea, please. A few treats and a tennis ball didn’t put me out that much. My army pension and work at the bakery are more than enough, so please don’t worry.” She’s been open and honest with me about her anxiety…I do not wish to add to it.

“Okay, Zev.”

My gods, my heart is going to beat through my chest. The way she said my name. That sweet little smile. How…why…does she want me? Finding a bench under the shade of a large tree, he unpacked their picnic while she poured some water in a portable bowl for Horace. “Granted, I know little of how to train pet therapy dogs, but I’d say you’re doing famously with him, darling.”

Taking a bite of the salad he made, she smiled, her freckled cheeks flushing. “Oh thank you! Honestly, he makes it really easy. Horace has always been very chill, doesn’t go crazy barking at everything…anyways, I’m glad you like him. Or at least, tolerate him.” She took another bite and leaned back against the bench, chewing thoughtfully. “I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t like him.” Beatrice turned her head, her gaze meeting his.

Lathander’s light, is she—

Zevlor swallowed. “Am I that someone?” Please, let it be me.

“If you want to be.” Her voice was barely above a whisper, and he thought at first, he did not hear her correctly. Before he could respond, she continued and began to ramble adorably. “I know you’re older than me. You’re a tiefling. I’m a half-drow. You’re from Elturel. I’m from the Gate. But…” Her nose scrunched a little as she pouted even more adorably. Good gods, I’m not going to be able to say no to her, am I? “I like you, Zevlor. I’ve not had the best time dating,” Give me names, darling. “But with you? It’s been lovely so far, and I hope we…we…um…” She had neglected to notice Zevlor’s face inching closer to hers until their lips almost touched. “We could date? If that’s something you want? I—”

As his lips touched hers, he quite deftly removed the container of salad from her hands and placed it behind her. His hands then settled on her ample waist as he inched closer to her. “There’s nothing I want more, sweetheart.”

“Oh thank fuck for that, because I was so worried—”

He hummed softly as he kissed her again, and this time, he tugged on her lower lip ever so slightly. “You needn’t worry. Not anymore.”

Zevlor was not sure why those particular words resonated with his lady.

All he knew was that after he said that she blushed more, squealed, wrapping her long arms around his neck, and kissed him passionately, moaning into his mouth.

Which was interrupted by Beatrice yelping when Horace licked her leg.

Horace, I thought you were on my side here!

“You naughty boy!” She laughed and picked up the corgi who began to lick him as well as her. “Mummy getting too much attention from Zev? Well too bad, Horace, because he’s going to be spending a lot more time with us.”

Those words resonated with Zevlor for all too familiar reasons. Since their first date (though if I’m being honest with myself, from the moment I saw her walk into Bex’s with her friend), he imagined them spending time together. However, he surprised himself with how domestic most of his fantasies were---cuddling, planning dates together, stealing kisses, holding her hand. Those were the fantasies that made him feel happy. And then there are the less than wholesome fantasies that make me feel like an old lecher.

She rubbed Horace’s head before placing him back on the blanket at her and Zevlor’s feet. “Maybe spending more time together…today?” Beatrice grinned. “With Nadia gone, I have the entire loft to myself. I could give you the grand tour,” Gods, you have the sweetest laugh. “And maybe watch a movie? Sit out on the deck? Whatever you want, Zev.”

Where have you been all my life? All the hardship and heartbreak…the horrors of war…being forced to leave Elturel…starting over in Baldur’s Gate…it’s all led me to you. Reaching for his beer, he sipped as he leaned back and with his other arm, wrapped it around her. “That sounds lovely, darling.”

She grabbed the container of salad and continued to eat. “Don’t worry---I’ll make sure to lock my bedroom door, so we don’t have Horace barging—OH.” Hilariously, she froze, her brown eyes wide. “What I mean is…umm…”

Alright, Zevlor. Let’s see if you still have it.

“As wonderful as Horace is, dear, the only tongue I want near me in your bedroom is yours.” He quipped, sipping his beer and smirking upon seeing her face blush darker than he had ever seen it.

Still got it.

[mutsky]

tsou ep 7 i cannot believe we are almost at the end

-i get fahlada a little too well i hate being represented like this

-:(((((

-these women have never worn a comfortable piece of clothing in their lives

-pulling off her clothes just to cuddle?

-🥴🥴

-this guy is trying so hard for what

-why am i laughing she didnt mean it like that shes just gay

-period tell her

-this man is such a pushover oh my god we are rooting for you (to give up and give in to your homosexual tendencies) but you are making it difficult

-oh they set this man up with their rizzless gay bestie

-homosexuality everywhere khun mae get used to it

-bow is the only doctor with rizz apparently

-YOU LISTENED TO TAN FOR ADVICE???

-omg lets fujo out ladies

-even their pjs look stiff

-and just like that the truth comes out

-oh this lie goes deeper than i thought the mom is evil

-shes pretending to be okay with the gay thing

-ok people in the comment section are saying lada is strong for carrying the suitcase downa mama she put in three suits and called it a day theres nothing in there

-weak slap

-im so sorry why does she drive a red lamborghini does that make sense to you

-oh shes quitting thats crazy

-last supper shes not dying actually im this dramatic about people leaving my job

-she doesnt save lives shes a dermatologist

-let me show you how its possible mama

-you dont want your daughter you want a toy to play with

-gonna be honest idc about her crocodile tears

-now shes gonna die to be petty 🙄 we do not give a fuck

we need to stop being nice to homophobic parents oh my god

im gonna spend all finale annoyed i can just tell

[extremelyblackandwhite]

please more chris and diane!!!!

pairing: bar owner destroyer!chris x reader

It had become something that calmed her down after work, going to see Chris at his bar. No matter how many times he said he didn’t want her there, he always had a pint of Coke waiting for her with a lemon slice and a cup full of ice. Just like every single Friday, she parked her car by the bikes, her hand pushing the door; yet, instead of hearing Chris mock her or call her Diane Chambers again, she found the bar was oddly quiet. 

     - Hey little bride. - Bill piped up. - How’s work? That case still giving you a headache? Need me to silence them?

     - Bill, you can’t tell me you’ll commit murder for me. That way I can’t defend you in a court of law. - she sat next to him. - Where’s the half bald version of Sam Malone? 

     - Ah ... - Bill took a sip of his beer. - He’s wallowing in self pity in the back. 

     - And the bar is still open?

     - Free beer, little bride. He can wallow in self pity as much as he’d like if that means I get as many pints as I can serve.   

Y/N looked around, grabbing her bag and making her way towards the back. She’d never been to his office before, heck, she’d only been to the upstairs bedroom because he didn’t want her to “die near his bar”. Chris was a private person, he didn’t really like sharing much about himself. He’d never told Y/N what he did before he was a bar owner, he didn’t tell her how old he was, he didn’t tell her his last name and he definitely never invited her into the back. However, perhaps the last one was solely reserved for whenever a pretty lady walked into the bar. She’d witness it one too many times before when a woman, either lost or intent into going in the bar would struck a conversation with Chris and soon enough she’d be invited in the back. Y/N guessed she was not part of the elite group of women who go to go there. She knocked on the door but heard no answer or Chris’ familiar grunting so she opened the door to find him smoking, his boots atop his desk right next to a glass of whiskey on the rocks, just like the one he used to have at the end of the day. 

   - Bill said you were wallowing in self-pity. - she closed the door behind her. - Just came to warn if you don’t go outside, they’re gonna drink all the ale they can find. 

    - Couldn’t give a shit about that. - he replied but not like he usually did. No, he sounded crude. - What? Can’t find the tap for Coke? 

   - Came to check in on you since you’re apparently chain smoking and drinking yourself to death. 

    - Don’t be dramatic, Diane. - he put out the end of his cigarette against the ashtray before grabbing another one and lightening. - You want one?

    - I don’t smoke. - she crossed her arms. He chuckled, letting out a cloud of smoke and a mumble of “of course not”. - Do you want to talk? 

    - My god, Diane, the last thing I need is you to pretend to be a shrink. 

    - You’re clearly acting like much more of an asshole than you usually do. 

    - Maybe I am an asshole, have you thought about that? - he replied as if her words had no effect on him and if he was being honest, today her words had little to no effect on him.  

    - God, I thought we were past this act of you pretending you hate me. 

    - I never pretended I hate you, I’ve always did hate you, you spoilt little princess. 

    - Really? I am the best thing that could’ve happened to you. At least I made the bar a bit brighter. 

    - Are you kidding me? You are the worse thing that has ever happened to me. Now I don’t know if you’re only sticking around here because you’re needy or horny since you escaped the lucky bastard that is your ex-fiancé, but I was the happiest man in the world before you stepped foot here. 

    - Does that make you feel better? Does it? 

    - Sure as hell beats having to actually be outside and pretend I give a fuck about what you have to say every Friday. 

    - You know what? Fuck you, Chris!

    - Isn’t that what you came here to do?

She turned around and slammed the door behind her, making enough of a noise that the whole bar had turned to see what was happening. However, at this moment she couldn’t give more of a damn about how many people were looking at her. Instead, she just forcefully grabbed her bag and made her way out of the bar and into her car. New York had enough bars for her to content herself with. 

(...)

Chris stared at the old clock he’d gotten when he first bought the place. The pointers kept moving, almost mocking him about how intent he was on knowing what time it was. 3:58, 2 minutes and how many seconds away from closing time. The only people in the bar were him and Bill who had happily been ranting about a new bike he was looking to buy and re-do. 

    - She’s not coming. - he said, drinking whatever was left of the beer in his glass. 

    - Don’t know who you’re talking about. 

    - Yes, you do. - he interrupted the bar owner before he could continue. - She hasn’t come back in two weeks. 

    - I couldn’t give any more fucks about where she is. Keeps my bar sane if she’s not around. 

    - Still think it was a dick move to unload on her like that. Kid was just trying to be nice. 

    - Last thing I need is a spoiled girl in my bar. - he cleaned the last glass, part of him still hoping she was gonna waltz in late like she used to do. 

    - You know what, Chris? It’s not her fault ‘ya ex-bride is popping out ‘ya best mate’s kid. Keep going with this bullshit and you’re gonna be alone.

    - What is this? Protect Diane Chambers time? If you like her so much, then fuck her for all I care. 

    - You watch how you talk about her. - he got up. - Don’t wanna have any problems with me, son.

Honestly, Chris felt tempted to start a fight. Between Y/N throwing a fit over nothing and his ex being pregnant, maybe getting punched and throwing a few punches would make him feel better. However, this was Bill and starting a fight with him would either end up with Chris in the ER or in the cemetery. Both seemed like great options but he was tired and all he wanted to do now was go upstairs and watch whatever shitty TV show was on. He threw the Coke glass in the sink and went upstairs. 

She didn’t come again for 4 weeks and he knew how ridiculous it was that he had started to count them, yet here he was now, 4 weeks in without a sight of her. Perhaps it was better she was not here on this particular Friday, the bar crowded with Bill’s old friends as he celebrated whatever birthday he was celebrating. Chris didn’t ask, it was not his business. He just stayed behind the bar, serving whatever it was they ordered. 

    - LITTLE BRIDE! - his attention finally turned towards the group as he saw her there. She had come back. - You came!

    - Couldn’t miss your birthday, Bill. You know you’re my favourite. 

    - Sit. - he gathered room for her. - You want anything? 

    - No, I just came to wish you happy birthday and drop by a little gift. - she put a black bag on the table. - I have to get back to New York, have a business trip next week. 

   - A very busy lady, aren’t ‘ya?

   - I keep busy. - she smiled. - I’ll see you around, Bill. Don’t get into too much trouble. 

   - Can’t promise anything.

How dare she? How dare she come into his bar after 4 weeks and not even direct a word to him? Heck, he’d let her sleep in one of the extra bedrooms upstairs and even if not, this was his bar and good manners dictated she said something, even if an annoyed “hi”. He threw the red rag he was using to clean the counter on the floor and went past the bar and outside, following her like a raged wolf. 

   - You gotta be fucking kidding me, Y/N. 

   - I don’t feel like engaging you in your petty little fights tonight, Chris. - she took her car keys from her bag. 

   - Oh really? You love to talk so much, actually, you never shut up but tonight you particularly chose to talk to everyone but me. 

   - I thought since you hate me so much, I’d save you the trouble of having to speak to me. 

   - Oh, real mature, Y/N. - he crossed his arms. 

   - Yes, real mature. I haven’t heard you apologise for being an absolute dickhead the last time we spoke. Actually, I’ve never heard you apologise for anything. 

   - What? You want me to apologise for hurting your feelings? Grow a backbone, Y/N. 

   - Maybe you should grow some manners. - she stepped towards him. 

   - You are the most fucking annoying person I have ever met. 

   - LIKEWISE! 

The two stared at each other with fire in their eyes and before Chris or Y/N could think about what would be the correct thing to do in this situation, he had wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her in for a kiss. The two pulled apart, her eyes looking into his with a mix of shock, innocence and shyness. 

   - I have to go back to New York.

   - You probably should.

   - Yes, I should. 

   - Drive safe.

   - I will. 

[strangedreamings]

S2E5 (spoilers abound)

The credits sequence hasn't changed, as far as I can tell.

Driftmark. Corlys limping to the Driftwood Throne. He's weeping over the death of his wife. As far as he knows, he's lost everyone now -- both of his children and his wife. (It's even money whether the writers even remember that Laenor is still alive.)

There's a fucking famine and all the Greens care about is parading Meleys' head through the streets. Guys, reminding the people that dragons CAN BE KILLED probably isn't the wisest thing to do right now. How many of them have lost livestock to feed the dragons' stomachs?

The Targaryen family literally spent YEARS convincing the people of Westeros that being dragonriders made them superior, now you're showing them that a dragon is really just a giant, flying horse. This is going to bite you in the ass so damn hard very soon.

"It's just meat." EXACTLY!

If Rhaenys' body is on that wagon, they need to have the Silent Sisters escort it to Driftmark, it's the only decent thing to do.

Aemond is still so damn pretty.

To be fucking honest, I don't know if that's Rhaenys' corpse or Aegon II's almost-corpse in that box. I wouldn't put it past Cole to have Aegon II transported in a way that no one can see how mangled he is.

So it was Aegon. He must be in a coma to have not made a sound this entire time. As fucked up as he is, he still didn't deserve this.

Alicent, you don't want to see this. And when did you suddenly decide you give a damn about Aegon anyway?

Ugh, they have to cut his armor off him and honestly, he looks like barbecued meat. Aemond's got a lot to answer for but the only person who can accuse him is currently comatose.

The burns make him look like he has greyscale, it's that bad.

I'm not crazy about this Grand Maester but he does seem to know what he's doing.

Oh, his broken legs. Poor guy, he'll never be able to walk properly again, if at all.

Aemond sniffing around, wanting someone, anyone, to name him Prince Regent. Sadly, he's the best option. God knows Alicent and Helaena aren't in the right frame of mind right now to rule.

But really, if the monarch can't rule, it's supposed to be the Hand who fills in. Criston, stop cleaning your sword (are you having a Lady MacBeth moment?) and do your job.

Wait, Sunfyre is dead? I thought Sunfyre is the one that eats Rhaenyra. *side-eyes the writers* What the fuck?

"He who has left us after some marital spat." I really want this guy dead. Can someone just shank him, please? Again, someone calls him Ser Alfred, but what's his surname? I can't look this asshole up without a surname.

Excusing your misogyny isn't going to get you out of this, dude.

"You've seen no more battles than I have." God, I love you, Rhaenyra.

Jace and Baela. Honestly, Baela is the more mature of the two. Jace going behind Rhaenyra's back? To be honest, the Battle of the Gullet can't come soon enough, I'm sick of him. He's too immature, too hotheaded, and he listens to no one. He may be half-Targaryen but he's no prince.

Daemon involving himself in the Blackwood-Bracken feud. This is pointless.

I like Willem but I don't think Daemon can trust him, not when it comes to the Brackens.

The Eyrie. So this is the famous Lady Jeyne Arryn. She's upset that the dragons Rhaenyra sent with Rhaena are hatchlings.

"Will you goad me, child?" Honey, you're barely old enough to be her mother, shush.

I don't like Jeyne. I can understand her rage but I don't know, she's aiming it at the wrong target. Please tell me her offering her sympathy was not how Rhaena found out Rhaenys is dead.

"There is more than one way to fight a war." Let's get the propaganda machine churning! Again, I like Mysaria, but I don't know if Rhaenyra (or anyone) can trust her.

Where are they sending Elinda? This woman needs hazard pay.

Rhaenyra and Baela sharing memories of Rhaenys, this is what this episode needed.

Daemon's dreaming again but is that Aemma, Viserys' first wife?! Did Daemon have an affair with his sister-in-law or is he just straight tripping right now? At this point, we've seen every woman in his life in these dreams except for Rhea, his first wife. Blood on his hands again.

"My favorite son"? Is she supposed to be his mom Alyssa now? Daemon, your head is a fascinating place, I swear. You need to get out of Harrenhal with whatever sanity you have left.

Daemon's chair is as broken as his psyche.

Lord God Almighty, Daemon, you're not the fucking monarch. Saying anything otherwise is treason.

Grand Maester reporting on Aegon's prognosis and Aemond is over there smirking. Boy, you need a better poker face if you want the world to believe you didn't do it.

Alicent is made to see exactly how valuable a woman's voice is in a world ruled by men. Honey, I hate to say it, but you deserve this. Like Larys said, if they're saying Rhaenyra can't rule, then they can't have a female Regent.

Prince Regent Aemond. God help the realm.

"We should make for Tumbleton." Absolutely fucking not! You're not going to a town that's going to see TWO battles.

Cheese's dog following the cart with his body, so sad.

The woman who fucked the man who was supposed to be guarding her grandson is talking about temperance? Fuck you, you hypocrite.

"I did not give you leave to speak my name." Honey, you gave him leave to eat you out, the two kinda go together. :P

Their child's skin is GRAY, this kid is either dead or almost there.

Why are the Freys using a door as a table?

"Dragons cannot be in two places at once." These Freys do realize the Blacks have multiple dragons, right?

Fuck yes, give the Freys Harrenhal, that'll end that House right there and they won't be a problem for future generations.

"Bent knees." Yeah, Jace just woke up the whole fandom.

Secret pacts with the Freys never end well.

Daemon and Alys. I thought she was supposed to be Aemond's lover, not his.

Daemon's plotting to take KL himself. Yeah, keep dreaming. You're never leaving the Riverlands.

"The Blackwoods will be feted in these halls." With what money, Daemon?

Corlys doesn't want to be Hand but he does want to make Baela his heir, but she turns him down. Honestly, Baela should be Hand.

So I found out this guy's name is Ser Alfred Broome, and he becomes a turncloak. Raise your hand if you're at all surprised.

"Not while I live, Your Grace." Liar.

Hour of the wolf, the "blackest part of the night." So, something like four in the morning.

Ser Simon has the thankless task of keeping Daemon on target, poor guy.

Laena's back to remind Daemon that he has two daughters.

I have to love that this thunderstorm is big enough to cover Harrenhal, KL, and Driftmark.

Helaena knows what Aemond did. Is it bad that I still ship them? (Don't @ me, they're Targaryens.)

Alicent, you know you can put Aegon out of his misery, right? I'm sure there are plenty of pillows around. Just saying.

"Mummy." Aww. Go back to sleep, Aegon.

For the uninitiated, Vermithor was the dragon of Jaehaerys I (Viserys I's predecessor) and Silverwing was the dragon of Alysanne, Jaehaerys' sister-wife and queen.

So, they're going with Targ cousins instead of the dragonseed bastards to ride the remaining dragons? Interesting.

They're ending the episode there? Boo. Still no Ser Harrold.

Watching the credits. I love that the two units are named "Fire" and "Blood."

Next week's episode is gonna be gory, calling it now.

[iwoszareba]

so that diamond ‘thoughts abt your character’ thing. I enjoy writing the clown man so every KC I feel I have decent enough grasp on gets a hot take. 

we are going with Knave as a companion bc that's the easiest option

I'm so sorry if you did not want to hear from him, some of his opinions are real garbage @dujour13 @commander-lariel @turbulentpumpkin43 @silversiren1101 @lairiend @angrygoatwoman @dmagedgoods @offsidekineticist @vulpineix @desnas @cassynite @spyridonya @undyingembers

Siavash

He is disgustingly sweet. And you think to yourself 'I can be a responsible adult and cut my sugar intake' but then you see that cookie box on the table and what are you supposed to do? Not take one? Or two? Or a dozen? I hate him. He is fun.

Lariel

She just radiates fear seemingly unprompted? Someone should get that fixed. For the sake of the crusade or something. Don't look at me, I don't know how nor am I inclined to. If the decision was up to me I would release the storm inside her to see what happens.

Zrise

He is so sour! And angry! Trying to get respect by being the meanest dog in the neighbourhood. But his bite matches his bark so it's all fine. And hey, I'm an honest fellow of honest pleasures so he can bite me any time he wants.

Ariadne

She is a hoot! Not many things in this world more exciting than a good explosion. And she provides those in spades. Surprisingly she also seems to like me? The other shoe will drop eventually I'm sure but for now I can just enjoy what we have.

Mino

I know she has chaos at her core, you can see it leak sometimes and it's glorious. But instead of indulging in it, it's like she's made an oath to try to be boring at all costs. Do you think it's Regill's influence? Can boring rub off on another person? What a terrifying thought.

Agria

This lady is on fire! Metaphorically I mean, I think she may end up burning herself, also metaphorically. But I have to admit I do enjoy watching the flames go higher (metaphorically and literally) so I'm here for it. Look at her go!

Oleander

Don't tell him this, I don't want him to start thinking I'm a possible convert but if I reeeeeeeally had to choose a god to worship it would be Lamashtu. I like to think we monster types have an understanding. Even when he is being all nice like a freak.

Salvadore

I feel like I'm supposed to hate him and I kinda do. Angel man with a stick up his ass. But then he does something unexpected and it's like: woah! Where did that come from? I'm begging you to show me more. I'm at the edge of my seat.

Theoven

Such a funny little guy! Like a cart on the path to a disaster no matter which track he picks. Honestly that's plenty enjoyable. And he has so much emotion in him, he should let loose more often! I can hardly believe he is related to Regill of all people.

Luthais

What a wet blanket of a person. Could you give us a single emotion? No? Okaaaaay I can drag something out of you but I don't think you will like it! Seriously, he is a piece of work. I get that he is doomed by the narrative but he could at least try to be funny about it.

Taro

Have you ever met someone who looks at a wild beast and thinks they can turn it into a friendly critter? I think that's how they look at me and it's extremely funny. But I can play along for a little while, why not. Watch me be the freakiest little azata.

Sparrow

She is like a box locked in a box locked in a box locked… You get the idea. I don't know what's at her core and at this point I'm not sure it's worth the effort. I'm still gonna try to get her riled up whenever possible. What else is there to do?

Kadira

It's comforting to see someone who got fucked up by Areelu just as bad. I think she should get angrier about it but hey. Good for her for having a semblance of emotional stability. Or maybe it's just an act? It would be fun to see her spiral. I mean that affectionately.

Lenarius/Leonosa

Not only is he all prim and proper but he also does not get annoyed easily. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with her! I guess I have to try harder? Really backing me into a corner here. Sigh. Maybe I should just kick back and take it easy.

[kravchikfreak]

Do you have a sort of "ideal picture" of Arcane s2 you wanted to see? If so, I would really love to hear what you wanted s2 to actually be like

boi oh boi what a nice question! thank you

wish i had just as nice answer to it (i've been writing this one for what... years?). but to be honest if i was a good writer myself i'd already have finished all my 37 books in progress. thoi feel like i'm pretty great in drabbles and generating ideas

so um yeah i don't have like "ideal picture" per se but i do have some let's say adjustments

1) first of all we need to get rid of all these пердежей в лужу (farting in a puddle for all my non-russian-speaking comrades). if a character makes a point (with some pretentious attitude nontheless) then either the point should stand or the change in the character's views or position should be actually shown. "you have to understand on your own that even if vi didn't want to become enforcer at first after the attack at memorial she changed her mind". no-no-no. look, if the book says "he said, 'let the waters under the heavens be gathered together into one place, and let the dry land appear.' and it was so" i mean i CAN understand what happened, and even how, and all those things, but i sure as hell won't feel any emotions. it's "okay he did it, cool". but what about actually showing some struggle? more details? no? what's the point of a story if the story has to be created by the listener? mel saying hard "no" to hextech weapons and acting all cool and mighty in the process just for the same exact episode ending with a swat team armed with hextech weapons and 0 commentary of mel's previous hard "no". characters' words don't mean shit cause if they need to do 180 on their believes for the sake of story they won't even bother to acknowledge they said something in the past

how to change? let someone meaningful to vi be hurt in the attack or let jinx be a part of it. i mean some lady does a personal vendetta cause her son was killed by piltie counselor? why does vi jump to hunting jinx as enforcer? also thinking about it it's kinda funny how this lady's personal vendetta makes cait call undercitizens animals just for her to go on the similar vendetta right after

2) cut out pointless stuff. or make them have a point. like the whole sequence of vi trying to go through the crowd cause she thought the neck tattoo on the enforcer looked suspicious. either cut it out or make her reach someone, or divert the attack, or do something other then go through crown and do fuck all. or like that also long ass scene when jinx gets touched by her followers. it's touching i guess but they're all dead one minute after and jinx never think of them ever again anyway. make her their actual cult leader or get rid of their meeting idk. isha's suicide sequence should also be gone. no alternative, just gone, idc. while we are at it might cut out isha altogether

3) which would actually be a shame cause i love children and found families and fucked up families and taking care of our smaller brothers, so like when i saw isha falling on jinx my first thought was "god i hope jinx will adopt him". so the third thing i would do is actually fixing this whole mess with isha. make her an actual character instead of empty plot device. it's cool i guess that we have a cool scene of her falling like an angel from the sky but also would be nice to at least know why a baby was chased by three muscle heads. give her background and personality instead of "look it's a parallel to jinx and silco! we even turned this child into little powder for you, dyed her hair and made jinx say it outloud to make it more convincing"

4)

okay the problem is i have so many thoughts i get lost in them and burn myself out when i try to write them all down in one go. so i might just cut it here and now. maybe just some bullet points?

less pointless nonsense, more stuff that actually matter but was left off screen, more actual conflicts instead of "bigger threat and common enemy", cait actually going mad or something, jinx actually becoming revolutionist or something, maddie is a good person who dies on cait's arms and it makes cait revaluate her behavior, caitvi actually work on their issues. maybe 4 more seasons idk. also no stupid "silco knew jinx's mother" bullshit. i don't even care if vander knew her at this point, but silco... hell no

and. way. less. pARaLLelS. that are just "redrawing my old art 2021/2024". it's just lame

anyway thank you again! it was fun thinking about all the little stuff. frustrating but fun. almost

[bonniehooper]

MR. ROBOT REWATCH, 2x01 & 2x02: “eps2.0_unm4sk-pt1.tc” & "eps2.0_unm4sk-pt2.tc"

-Part one?

-Oh, we’re seeing when Tyrell recorded the message that went out to everyone.

-Wait, why is Elliot reaching into the popcorn machine?

-Why are we seeing when Elliot’s dad pushed him out of the window?

-What was the point of that flashback?

-Wait, how do they know it was Tyrell? Also, how did they make it look like Obama was saying all that? I mean, I know it’s possible, but it looks so real.

-Leon!

-I forgot about Leon’s obsession with Seinfeld.

-Did he draw a QR code in his journal? If so, what’s it for?

-I’m surprised that Krista would still see Elliot after everything he told her he did last season.

-Oh, he doesn’t trust Mr. Robot.

-Elliot: “I’m not ready to trust you yet, not after what you did.” Wait, after what "I" did? What the hell did I do?

-Elliot: “You kept things from me, and I don’t know if I can tell you secrets like before.” Hey, I only knew what you let me know, so that’s more on you than me. I’m just saying.

-I wasn’t honest with you? You weren’t honest with me, Elliot! You’re the one who hid that Mr. Robot was in your head and resembled your father. I wasn’t privy to that info before you told me. Stop blaming me........Why am I arguing with a fictional character?

-Why is Mr. Robot hiding Tyrell from Elliot?

-Oh fuck, I forgot that Mr. Robot shoots Elliot in the head.

-Oh my god, that’s such a crazy image of Elliot sitting up with a bullet hole in his head and asking Mr. Robot, “You done?”

-Wait, “again”? How many times has he shot you?!

-Who’s this lady?

-Okay, who is fucking with the stuff in this lady’s house?

-Darlene, did you fuck with this lady’s house so you could squat in her empty house?

-Gideon? Why are you visiting Elliot?

-Shit, Allsafe closed?

-Gideon: “Everyone’s telling me it’s over.” Mr. Robot: “Gee, I wonder whose fault that is. Was that you or me? I’m getting all mixed up, I can’t recall.” Fuck you, Mr. Robot. Gideon doesn’t deserve this.

-I hate that Gideon is taking the fall and Elliot wants to help him, but he can’t!

-Not going to lie, I'd probably lose my mind if I had to listen to Leon talk about Seinfeld all day, every day.

-So, when you’re annoyed you shoot Elliot, what are you going to do to him when your feelings are hurt?

-Darlene, what’s wrong?

-So, is this ladies house the new headquarters for fsociety?

-Wait, how are you on the losing side, Darlene?

-Where’s Angela?

-What’s happening now? What’s on the teller’s screen? Is this fsociety’s doing?

-An intermission? And now part two? What is this episode's structure?

-Scott, I don’t know if this is a good idea.

-Making a delivery? Is he really or does he work for fsociety?

-Wait, they want him to put a mask on and what give people the money?

-Oh, never mind, he’s burning the money.

-So, what exactly was the point of this?

-That abrupt cut of the song startled me.

-I was about to say, do you not know how this works dude? It’s all good, Joanna’s into it.

-Oh God, I can’t remember her name, but I recognize her face.

-Doesn't she work for the FBI?

-Oh God, what are you going to tell them Gideon?

-I forgot Craig Robinson was in this show!!

-Yeah, what happened to Flipper?

-What’s your line of work, Ray?

-Ray: “Damn, man. That’s some cold, brutal shit right there. I’m going to have to go listen to some Adele on repeat when I get back home.”

-So were they able to get Nancy Grace to film this or did they manipulate footage like they did with Obama earlier?

-Dude, Joanna only needs you for one thing, now get lost.

-Wait, where is her son?

-Angela, finally!!

-Damn, Angela has grown colder, yet more confident in her job since the last time we saw her.

-Angela, what is this music?

-Ha ha, bitches!! Looks like Angela's good at her job, huh?

-What is that present?

-Joanna, I wouldn’t trust it.

-Did Tyrell send her a phone so they can communicate?

-Damn, Angela was completely on this lawyer’s side last season, now she doesn’t want anything to do with her.

-Angela: “I’ve done more for you and the lawsuit than you’ve ever done for me or yourself.” Damn, Angela. What the fuck has happened to you?

-I just realized, does Angela know where Elliot is right now? Does she even care?

-Okay, Angela, I like you getting more positive and standing up for yourself, but you just seem like you’ve gotten colder, and I don’t like it.

-When you two spoke last night? Oh fuck, what did Mr. Robot do?

-Oh my God, Elliot just laughing at Mr. Robot is so fucking creepy. God, Rami is so good.

-Elliot: “I’m late for my church group. Peace.”

-Just give Elliot what he wants Mr. Robot, and you can have what you want.

-Back off, Brock.

-Wait, his husband left him? Seriously?!

-I don’t trust this guy. Gideon, you need to leave.

-NO!!! OH MY GOD, I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BITCH KILLING GIDEON!! FUCK OFF, HE DIDN’T DESERVE THAT!!!!!!!!!!

-Of course, the phone rings when Joanna’s not by it.

-Elliot are you falling asleep during your group?

-Whoa, what happened? How much time has past? Who is on the phone?

-Tyrell?!

-And that’s how you end the episode?!