#‘content over cinema’ i hate u.

[autism-alley]

hi originally posted this at the end of a long thread of back and forth, here’s the og post if you want full context but i feel like this needs to be its own post especially bc i keep seeing this argument being made—the argument that the kids (in this case it was annabeth) SHOULD just know the monsters are monsters and who they are and how to defeat them before ever encountering them, that it’s a problem if they don’t.

the problem is not if 12 year olds should recognize a trap when they see one, even if they’re smart 12 year olds, and if that’s realistic. that is entirely beside the point.

the problem is rick riordan wrote a book series whose formula is bringing myths to the modern age and he’s not sticking true to that in the show—percy jackson and the olympians’ Shtick is taking these classic, ancient threats and giving them a new face. these traps work because these kids are not walking into a cave marked with Get Out and getting ambushed by monsters—the monsters are disguised as harmless mortal human beings, in harmless mortal human being places (for the most part) and i think we—and more importantly, the show—are all forgetting the mist, the magic involved here. it’s not just that medusa is a “creepy lady with her eyes covered” it’s that there is ancient magic at work here, magic that, like the systems of abuse pjo exists to criticize, has been evolving and continuing its malevolence for millennia. it’s formulaic, that’s the point. it’s the same trap you’ve learned about all your childhood, the same trap a thousand children before you learned all their childhoods, and still, it works. you fall into the trap. because that’s how generational abuse works. it’s a trap. it isn’t enough to learn monsters exist, what they look like from a second hand story that originated thousands of years ago. if you want to escape alive, you have to adapt as quickly as they do, recognize their face, and ultimately, beyond any individual trap, the game itself has to change. real, generational change.

so. the problem is rick riordan wrote a series with a formula for action that perfectly captures the overarching, systemic conflicts he was commentating on, and then threw that formula out in the show because it was “unrealistic”. i don’t give a damn about realism when it works to the detriment of the story. this is a story about generational abuse, yes, but it’s told through ‘a tale as old as time’ and that’s why it works so fucking well. and when it comes to basic storytelling, if your characters know the threat before they even walk in and you do practically nothing to then make up for the stakes you have removed, that’s a flaw. now you’ve lost the entertainment value for your audience, on top of also lessening your themes.

something else that is so. honestly soul-crushing as a writer and a creative, is that to me this is reflective of the way we are now afraid to tell earnest stories. stories where we care not for listening to the people who want to pick apart fictional, mythical, fantasy stories for not being “realistic” instead of aligning with our target audience who acknowledges reality is not what makes a story. think of your favorite movie, show, book, comic, what have you—has the reason for your favoritism ever been because it is the most reasonable, the most grounded, the most practical out of any you’ve seen? or is it because of the emotion? the way it speaks to you, to your life and the person you are? the journey it takes you on? is the percy jackson and the olympians book series so good because it’s inherently realistic?

the secret to storytelling is, very simply, focus on your story. everything else is secondary. if it’s written well, it doesn’t matter to me that the characters walk into a trap that, to the audience, is obviously a trap. because i can understand how the characters don’t know it, and how the story falls apart if the narrative just tells the characters it’s a trap from the jump. that’s what dramatic irony is—first used in greek tragedies! this is literally a tale as old as time in every sense except for the end—where it’s happy. and it’s not earned if we don’t first see, over and over, the status quo as a tragic trap.

it’s not about if annabeth (or the other kids) is “smart enough” to not walk into a trap, or about if she’s just too prideful to not walk into what she knows is a trap (or any reason that could apply to the other characters), it’s that annabeth, at the end of the day, is a character. she is a storytelling tool for the messages of the narrative. that doesn’t make her any lesser. in fact ignoring it reduces her, because it reduces what she represents. it’s about how rick riordan, or whoever else at disney, has fumbled the storytelling bag so ridiculously hard that they can’t take the simple, effective formula outlined from start to finish (by good ol 2009 rick himself) and adapt it to the screen without answering the most unimportant, derailing, anti-story questions.

[zalrb]

how do you critically analyse everything u watch? what do u focus on? would u make a 101 post? (if u have the time)

This is difficult because it's not really something I'm conscious of doing but I think the best way I can explain it is questioning why I'm responding to something the way I'm responding to it.

So, for something like The Summer I Turned Pretty, the way music was used really bothered me. So my thought process with that would be: the music doesn't suit the scene. Why doesn't the music suit the scene? Because it doesn't speak to the theme/message/content of the scene. What is the theme/message/content of the scene? Now, that I've established the theme/message/content of the scene, what could be done instead to suit what's happening?

and for something like this, one of the reasons why I know this is because I've watched a lot of things and I know when music really works with a scene and when music is put over in a more flippant fashion.

I hate George and Izzie, I hated everything about this storyline, I love this scene because the music works tonally, lyrically, it goes

and a scene and song going together isn't necessarily about it being lyrically accurate either, the mood of "The Ice Is Getting Thinner" works with this scene and it sets the tone and an intimacy between Blair and Chuck

For something like Oppenheimer it would be going into watching it knowing that there's this discourse going around about the fact that there are no Japanese people in this movie. The defence for that is that it's a movie about Oppenheimer and his process and motivations and journey to making the atomic bomb rather than the war. So that's not at the front of my mind while I'm watching it, it's just some context for the movie that I have. Then I watch the movie and a scene happens that flags something for me, which would be the scene where Oppenheimer visualizes the impact of the bomb during his victory speech in which the crowd he's talking to gets burned, gets their skin peeled off, etc. etc. Why am I aware of this scene? Because that could've been a scene that shows the devastation that happened in Hiroshima. There are ways that could've been done: we could see Oppenheimer do the speech and trail off, look to the side, then cut to the devastation in Japan and it would be obvious that he's thinking about what's happening/what happened as he's speaking. Or he could still visualize the people in front of him being impacted by the bomb but it also cuts to the people who are actually impacted by the bomb.

For something like Saltburn, which is heavily stylistic in a way that's different than something like Oppenheimer, the context I have while watching it will be what I learned as a cinema major. I'm not consciously thinking about that but when I get an ask about how Farleigh and Oliver have more chemistry and that's maybe why I responded to their dynamic more than Oliver and Felix, and I consider it, is that true? Not necessarily because it was about dynamic for me not chemistry and then I think about how the way things are shot to communicate the dynamics, which leads me to think about the intention of the scenes, the intentions of the shots, the intentions of the actors:

So, I hope this helps?

[kylejsugarman]

top 10 most hated movies go

oh jude u understand my haterdom :') in no particular order.....

"the open house": netflix's low to mid-budget horror movies tend to be resoundingly boring with occasional glimmers of cleverness but "the open house" is genuinely one of the worst modern horror movies. at least "the bye bye man" had some unintentional laughs: "the open house" is one of the dullest, darkest, most boring excuses for a film ever made. it doesn't even have an ending, as if its expecting its audience to have fallen asleep before then and absolving it from coming to a real conclusion. AWFUL.

"escape from tomorrow": im not the biggest fan of jenny nicholson and her content, but she absolutely nailed it with her video taking down "escape from tomorrow". its an embarrassing ego trip with no semblance of story or thematic integrity. how can u secretly shoot a movie at disney world and be such an incompetent filmmaker and storyteller that the most interesting part of said film is the overdubbing of characters saying "neosporin" to avoid getting sued

"spencer": truly dont understand what the fuck anyone was on in applauding this film. "spencer" is basically "the haunting of sharon tate" with an arthouse filter over it. kristen stewart isn't a genius, this film was a depressing and embarrassingly voyeuristic slog, and i hope we all die

"la la land": a circle jerk about old hollywood masquerading as an "ode" to the movies and old movie musicals. pasek and paul need to be barred from the industry for their horrendous songs and chazelle should be ashamed of this masturbatory piece of insubstantial garbage that frames white mediocrity and paper-thin romance as the pinnacle of cinema. also it's just racist as fuck

"split": m night has made some awful movies and i have problems with almost all of them, but jesus christ, "split" is truly fucking vile. even putting aside the obvious demonization of personality disorders and james mcavoy's laughable performance, it's a boring, uninspired slog with a screenplay written on a fisher play laptop. also the theme of horrific trauma being something that makes u Special and intrinsically a Survivor?? kys

"the polar express": this one's a little irrational, ive just always hated this movie even as a kid. the cgi isnt just creepy, its so muddled and lifeless that it can't distract from the interminable running time. this movie feels 4 hours long and its like getting ur teeth drilled the whole time.

"the sandlot": this movie exists solely for men in their forties to reflect on and say "they don't make kid movies like this any more". it is so unbelievably grating and pointless. im biased because baseball is my idea of torture, but id rather sit thru 16 hours of "minions" content than watch one scene of this kids' "classic".

"easy A": idk WHAT people see in this one. i dont find a single aspect of this film charming or clever or funny, it all feels so shallow and wink wink nudge nudge aren't we SO clever for turning THIS teen stereotype on its head?? there are a lot of "subverting ur expectations!!!!" movies from this era of late late 2000s-mid 2010s that i really dislike, but "easy A" is just the pinnacle of insufferable.

"the breakfast club": this might inspire some hate but i despise this film lol. i dont care that its a seminal work or whatever, it is so crushingly unfunny and boring and filled to the brim with unlikeable characters. in the same vein as "easy A", none of this film is charming or clever and even giving grace to the more Outdated aspects of this film, its a grossly obnoxious, unengaging flop that thinks it's saying Something.

"a serbian film": look. we could sit here for hours debating the necessity of this film and what it says about censorship, especially in eastern europe, but at the end of the day, this is a cold, uncreative shock film that indulges in its own depravity. im not above fucked up movies with depraved elements, but "a serbian film" seems manufactured, not created in its depravity. also it perpetuates the myth of the "porn to snuff pipeline", which is a huge issue with a lot of films of this ilk.

[vethbrenatto]

Here we go again: TLOVM Thoughts Part 2

Episode 4 Thoughts:

oooh miss delilah is pressed about her book

give scanlan back his instruments >:(

Delilah’s graveyard scene was INSANE

my poor pikey,,, even her light cantrips won’t work

Pike’s scene trying to connect to the Everlight but only finding empty darkness legitimately made me tear up

The pike/grog scene… my heart….

I think the split up of character was very intelligent - playing on close character pairings (pike/grog, Percy/keyleth, vex/vax, and then instead of putting scanlan where he’d usually go with grog and pike, which frees up grog from goofing off so he can have his emotional moment with pike)

the gore was a little much at points but I did find the monster sufficiently scary

A monster grabbed grog through the boobs????

The darkness monsters defeated by light thing was a bit cliche but worked really well narratively with both keyleth and pike’s story beats and with the d&d concept of vulnerabilities

I AM GOOPED GAGGED DEAD AT PIKE’S GOODBYE. FAVORITE SCENE OF THE SHWO SO FAR. WHAT IF I NEED YOU? YOURE THEIR LIGHT NOW. THE ZOOM ON SCANLANS FACE AS VM WALKS AWAY FROM PIKE. PIKE STANDING ALONE AAAA

Best Characterization of the ep: grog, pike

Episode 5 Thoughts:

“Crime doesn’t pay, but it is entertaining” was SUCH a line delivery, thank u gilmore

Vax and Gilmore flirting while keyleth is stuck in a finger trap is poetic cinema

I am now looking at every shot with horses from the lens of the animator who hates drawing horses

Percahlia banter continues to be cute

I literally had to pause the video to scream because of the grog and pike content. The way grog can’t hear her and is worried about how the group will fare without her I can’t-

Keyleth with her glowing green eyes and fangs go off babe

The bag falling over the cliff is MY villain origin story

Why do professor anders be shaped like that fjkskdkfk

OH MY GOD THE KID WITH PIKES SYMBOL FUCK FUCK SUN TREE FUCK THIS IS GONNA GUT ME HUH

the little vaxleth scene with the vine bracelet honestly I liked better than any canon original vaxleth alonetime scene sjjfkfkf

The rakshasa callback oh my god and then keyleth drowning a man in lava that was hilarious SHHH GO TO SLEEP

The return of stubby 🥺

Okay yep the sun tree scene wrecked me.

Best characterization: keyleth, vax, grog

Episode 6 Thoughts:

The little coleader squabble was so cute

I can get a beret!

The door bit while front door team succeeds on their mission is great

I FELL OUT OF THE WINDOW

Percy fucking covered in smoke: oh yeah my gun just does that :)

You just went full demon percy you can’t go “I have a sister” NOW

Best characterization: percy

Some Faves:

Favorite Characterization Overall: Pike, Grog Best Comedic Characterization: Keyleth (ngl mostly for the lava bit) Favorite Episode: Episode 4 (but honestly, all were great)

honestly, i found this batch of episodes had a lot more hitters in terms of jokes that worked. there were still quite a few swings and misses, but there were a lot more jokes that i genuinely laughed at in this batch than in the first few episodes. and the plot? WOOF!

i can understand why people were worried about this diverting attention from CR main because i dont know how im going to think about anything BUT this for the next ten hours

[rumblelibrary]

Okay I swear last one for now I swear 😅 might send some more when I wake up tomorrow.

But you said you would write for the actual Daniel and I saw one on the kink list and was like yes

So uh, Daniel Brühl with the filming (consensual) kink 😏

Consensual filming with Daniel Brühl

Warnings: S - M - U - T

(I can only thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me always such interesting plots to work with 💝💝💝 ILY and I Hope you'll enjoy iy)

It all begun on one random night, one like any other. Daniel was reading a

book about film making and screenplay adaptation.

You stared down at your own book, the soft music coming from the speakers lulling the both of you, your legs thrown over his lap as you laid on the couch.

You were soon to go to bed and you were trying to convince yourself to stand up and do your night routine.

“This camera angle language is fascinating" he said.

You sat up as you leaned in and he showed you all the pictures contained din the book, he pointed at them giving you some rough interpretation of them.

"I mean, I have been in those so many times but this changes my perspective"

You nodded as you looked at him, he was so absorbed by the idea of his first debut as a director, you adored to see him so driven . They were still onto the screenplay with the production, but he was way too into it.

"Maybe you can use my old digital camera, it is not that old in the end and you can practice"

He nodded and smiled a you kissing your forehead to thank you for your support.

"Thank you mi amor"

You winked at him as you stood up "I'll go to bed"

"Five minutes"

He said as he stood up and actually went to pick the camera from where you stored it and he plugged the battery up to charge overnight.

You called your own disgrace, because from that moment on you were on a movie set. He kept asking you to redo a thing, to move back into a room because he wanted to try it in a different way. Once he even asked you to cut the carrots all over again.

"But I don't need them"

Your own whines didn't help, you did it again because he decided that it would look better in a way and not the other.

The real deal came while you were watching a Spanish movie to improve your own language skills, better said you were ignoring it while kissing. It happened most of the times, Daniel loved cinema, but he had the greatest distraction beside himself.

"mi amor, tengo the enseñarte algo"

His whisper reached to your ears as he was nibbling onto your skin, his hands onto you as you were already try to get rid of his clothings.

It wasn't new he had to show you something, he was an actor, he was made to play dress up and you loved every bit of it.

You hummed contently as he stood up and left.

You stared at him walking away noticing how the man was prepping for his next role doing some weights and it showed onto his shoulders, in the way his comfy homey clothing now clung onto his upper chest giving it a show.

But it wasn't him in some historical clothing or suit that you found when you joined him but he bowed onto the camera adjusting some settings.

"There's my main actress"

You frowned "oh, no Daniel" you said covering your face as a little chuckle escaped you but it was pure nervousness.

"What? is that such a bad idea? it would be nice and embarrassing to rewatch it together, sexy in particular"

You frowned at him not sure about it

"Cielo"

The soft nickname he used with you rang through your bones as you looked away onto the bed, the room mildly illuminate by only the lamp on his nightstand, and then at him doing his prettiest puppy eyes.

"Fine"

You said as the biggest and brightest smile opened onto him.

"Okay, but please take only my good angles" you said trying to focus or maybe you should just relax "you have only good angles my angel. now, just panties and your, no wait"

He put down the camera and took off his white t-shirt "panties and my shirt"

You chuckled but obeyed as you picked the shirt and begun undressing leaving on your panties and slipping his shirt on before slowly crawling onto the bed.

You laid on yo beck trying to get comfortable as much as you could in such a peculiar moment.

You let a soft sigh out trying to relax on your first, and maybe last, leading role.

"Don't be nervous, you're so beautiful ,why don't you touch your body a bit"

You let out a big breath as you begun to follow his instructions, but you were still too tensed.

"Look at me"

He said as he held the camera and looked away from the little screen on the back of the camera to look up at you "I am so lucky"

He smirked as he moved closer, his shirtless figure being so attractive as his hair got a bit messed up when he took it off.

You almost didn't think about it as you started to touch yourself more, cupping your breasts and guiding your hands between your legs as he stared intensely at every movement.

"Put your hand in your panties"

you whimpered softly as you did as he said, you hated him because you wanted him so bad and you were touching yourself over his bare chested figure.

"oh, so hot to see your hand tucked in there" he commented and he made you feel excited only by thinking about it, about what you could achieve now, so you pulled up your shirt lightly exposing partially your breasts.

A little groan escaped him as your eyes travelled onto him with such a desire, it was impossible for him to hide the excitement growing into his pants as you begun to unleash little moans and pleads for more pleasure.

"come closer"

Your little whisper, your hand stretched toward you wanting more, the way the frame was captured and he moved near you to obey that wish using your arm as a bridge.

"Tell me"

You didn't answer him as you slipped your panties off legs before doing the same with his pants pulling them down along with his briefs.

He stared at you, he couldn't hold back a groan of pleasure mixed with surprise when instead of touching him you begun to run your tongue on his shaft while looking up at him, depositing soft kisses and licks on the tip. The camera recording it all as you finally welcomed his cock between your lips. He probably underestimated the effect this experiment would have on him.

"Fuck, you're so good"

He muttered under his breath as you bobbed your head so nicely taking him in and giving such a show for the camera as he zoomed onto you, your eyes briefly moving up to him as some pre cum coated your tongue.

He pulled back almost immediately not willing to cum like this, you really put an effort in this and he had to do the same.

He leaned on the bed resting the camera on his nightstand and turning the little screen on side to make sure both of you were well angled and it wasn’t recording into the void.

"You're such a tease"

He said as he knew you'd be a natural at it. You peeled his shirt off you as he pushed you down onto the mattress hovering you in a second, lacing your lips into a bruising kiss as he mercilessly pushed inside you making you groan n that kiss.

You felt so extra sensitive, you arched your back as you welcomed him, as he owned your body so perfectly.

You moaned his name as his lips found your neck again and he begun thrusting inside you, the camera already forgotten as he dived deep into that pleasure with you.

"You're so wet, you're shameless"

He whispered as he kissed you with a smile playing over his lips.

Your hands cupping his face as you pulled him closer, then digging your fingers onto those toned shoulders that obsessed you.

"Harder, harder"

You begged breathlessly as he moved his hand behind your head tangling his fingers among your hair. He was doing all in his power to not give in to that tempting sight you were and he failed himself pretty fast.

Your legs lacing around him as he supported himself easily over you, he was gone for it, next time probably wasting less time on foreplay because he wanted more angles of him fucking you.

His hand moving between your bodies to touch your clit as he snapped his hips hard into you, the hold up pleasure taking over as you reached your orgasm and he could finally let go after you.

"Fuck"

You hissed nuzzling against you as he pressed his forehead against your neck.

"You have talent, we should do that again"

"Next time will you be Zemo or Dr Kreizler?"

"Depends if you want to be played or play, mi amor"

[romanceimp]

Bitter Taste: Iwaizumi x f/reader Pt. 1

pt. 2 here

THIS IS SO LATE and I’m a fuck up hahahaha (kinda ironic this was 2 weeks late for Mental Health Awareness month) 

I am crediting my girl @kuso-deku for giving me Iwaizumi brain rot to begin with. I am also crediting @gixxie and @idonotagreebitch for helping me talk through my ideas... and crediting @doinmybesthere for the wonderful idea of a mental health awareness collaboration the link is here. PLS READ THE REST OF THE WORKS. Everyone deserves the love.

TW: manipulative male/female relationships, gaslighting?, subtle shit head crap that most men do (don’t worry Iwa is a peach as always tho, it’s Ushijima that’s the problem)

_ 

Iwaizumi stands and stretches in the cinema. The movie had been good, but long, he figured it was a little after midnight. “What’d ya think?” Kuroo asks as they exit the theatre. “I hated the ending…” Oikawa gripes, “I hate endings where everyone just dies.” “You are such a princess Tooru, I swear, it’s a metaphorical ending… did you not catch all the symbolism in the opening credits?” Iwaizumi sighs and turns his phone back on, trying his best to ignore their bickering. Slowly, notification after notification pops up… all from you. He blinks, surprised. You had declined his offer to join him for the film, stating you had previous plans attending a close friend’s birthday.

Iwa opens the messages from you. He sees first the selfies. You look beautiful, extravagant even. Your dress is beautiful, it compliments your figure perfectly with the corseted bodice. It’s white and so is your lace mask. Broad, feathered angel wings rest on your back. Angelic would have been a word he’d used to describe you before, but now, it was confirmed. He wants to keep staring at the photos but Kuroo and Oikawa are starting to become too curious about the contents of his phone. He scrolls and relaxes his face to look more casual. But it’s hard when your intoxicated messages are so darn cute.    

hope the movie is good!

okay so I guess there’s an open bar? Is it my birthday too?

if you wanna come by after the movie I’msure you coul

this partyyyy suckssssssss assssssssss

wish id gon wiht u xx

You are clearly drunk and he laughs to himself before Kuroo peers over his right shoulder. “Well she’s thinking about you at least,” he smirks. Oikawa peers over Iwaizumi’s left shoulder, “ooo play the voice message.” Oikawa taps the message before Iwaizumi can give him an answer.

“Hiiiii Iwaaaaaa, hope you like the moovie and you’re having a good time, cuz I’m having a preetyy good time, they gots free margaritaaass. Okay byeeeee”

The guys laugh and Oikawa presses the next one.

“Hey Iwaaa, I made up a song about you, ready?

Iwaizumi

Doesn’t know what he does- to me…

Sshfhsijknfhahaha I cant remember the rest som’n bout… som’n I dunno. Byeee”

“Okay, Ushi says that I need to say sorry for sending so many…” you pause and then whisper, “drunk messages, but I’as only tellin’ ya I ssink ‘r awesome ‘n you should totally come to this party and hang out with me… you’re awesome, okay byeee”

Oikawa and Kuroo pause and look at Iwaizumi. “Ushi?” Oikawa asks, “like Ushiwaka?” Oikawa’s eyes are narrowed and he gags dramatically in disgust. Iwaizumi nods and walks to exit the theatre. “Wait… that’s her friend who’s having the birthday party?” Iwa grimaces as Kuroo chuckles. “No wonder you’ve had a stick up your ass all night.” Iwa glares at him, “they’re just friends… apparently… I don’t know, she said they’ve known each other for a really long time…” Kuroo claps Iwaizumi on the back. “I think you should definitely go to the party.” Iwaizumi starts to object but the ring of his phone draws attention, and he answers it. “Heyyy you're outta th’moviee, heheeheheha,” you slur. Iwaizumi laughs softly and smiles, “yeah, I’m out of the movie now, are you… good?” There is so much background noise, it almost drowns out your sweet sleepy voice. “I’m soooo good… … I just-” he can hear your voice drop to a drunken whisper. “I’z just hoping to see you today,” you mumble finally.  

Iwaizumi can feel his heartbeat quicken, his head reeling. “Oh really?” He plays cool but then instantly regrets it when you give him a serious answer. “Yeah, I was really hoping you’d come to the party, even for just a little,” you murmur. Iwaizumi can’t help but chuckle. You were pretty cute like this, not normally so transparent. You were actually quite hard to read, so sweet but guarded and teasing too. You were a friend of Oikawa’s first and he had met you through him. He’d liked the way you sat cross legged on the couch smiling, chin in your hands while you asked questions and listened to his answers. Your eyes sparkle when you hear something you like, and your face lights up when you talk about things you find interesting.

“Ya don’t have to, I can just see ya another time,” you add. He’s been silent too long which causes him to speak without thinking. “No, I’d love to see you, I’ll head to you now.” Kuroo and Oikawa are silently cheering him on and Iwa turns away in embarrassment. “Really? Okay! I’ll drop my pin… as the kids are sayin’ these days hahaha.” “See you soon, drink some water okay?” “Mhm, I will, see ya soon!”

You were at a club owned by Ushijima’s family. A place called ‘Eagle’s Nest’. He’d only known you for a few weeks but he couldn’t help his infatuation. It was immediate, the night he had gone to Oikawas for game night. You spoke to him so easily not knowing him at all and laughed at his little side jabs to his long time friend. The way you looked at him… Iwa knew then that he wanted to see you smile, hear your laugh, and that he would be happy to assume the responsibility of making that happen.

He was surprised when you had declined his offer for the movie, feeling that you both had some definite chemistry, but Iwaizumi was even more surprised when you had said that you had prior plans with his old time rival Ushijima Wakatoshi. Iwaizumi hadn’t seen him since high school but they knew a few people in common, Oikawa being one of those people. Oikawa could sure hold a grudge but Iwaizumi took all of his comments with a grain of salt. Ushijima often came off entitled and cold, which would leave Iwaizumi with a bad taste in his mouth. Maybe Oikawa had the right idea holding a grudge… But grudge or not he wanted to see you, hear your voice and admire you all dolled up.

When Iwaizumi arrives at the club he is met with a large security guard. “Invitation?” he grumbles. Iwa remains calm but a small trickle of fear runs down his back. Iwaizumi gives the guard a casual smile before he starts to answer but he is interrupted. “Iwaaaaa,” you cry from the top of the stairs. The mask you’d had on is now resting on top of your head, the delicate features of your face now exposed. The floofy skirt of your dress bounces with your excitement as you run down the stairs. You crash into him, throwing your arms around his neck. You bury your face in his collar and still momentarily. Drunk and bubbly, you melt when Iwa wraps his arms around your waist in return, avoiding your costume’s wings. “Mmmm,” you hum, breath hot against his skin, “you smell good.” You pull back and stare into his wide eyes. “You look incredible,” he offers, a slight pink tint to his cheeks. You grin in return and simply take hold of his hand. “He’s with me,” you beam at the guard. Iwaizumi is doubtful this trick will work here. But he is surprised when the guard steps aside saying, “as you wish Miss L/N.” You giggle and pull Iwa towards the doors. “I’ll bring you some cake later, okay Jurou?” Jurou laughs, “just have fun darlin’.” “You’re the best,” you call behind you as you push open the doors. Iwaizumi can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy knowing that you are on a first name basis with one of the body guards at the Wakatoshi’s club. How close were you with Ushijima?    

Blue and purple lights illuminate the vast space while black tiles make up the main floor. The dance floor is sunken, in the middle of the club with a small set of stairs leading down to it. It’s made entirely of glass, beneath is a saltwater garden of different plants and coral.  

“You’ll need one of these,” you explain, swiping a simple black mask from the welcome table. You hand it over to him and pull yours down over your eyes. Iwaizumi adjusts it to where he can see. “You look so handsome,” you admire. He grins, “what about you? You’ve got wings!” You laugh and adjust your mask back on top of your forehead. “I’m a swan, and Ushi said I couldn’t be a swan without wings!” You spin for him, trying your best to flap the feathered wings. Small pieces of confetti glitter rain from the skirt of your dress. Iwaizumi takes in your face illuminated by the lights of the club. Blue and pink dancing over your cheeks as you smile up at him. “What?” you giggle nervously. Just a few weeks but he is mesmerised by your everything. He shakes his head and tries to move on. He wanted to tell you how he felt but this wasn’t the right time. It should be when you’re sober, when you can take in his words properly.

You coax him down towards the bar.  “You’re sure it’s okay to sneak in uninvited guests?” Iwa questions. “Well, I asked Ushi ‘nd he said it was okay, so yeah!” You grin but notice Iwaizumi’s reserve. “It’s really okay, I promise, let’s just get a drink,” you suggest and take his hand. “Only if you drink more water,” he smirks. You roll your eyes at Iwa, “I drank some water before you got here actually.” You look back at him as you both head down to the bar. “I’ll prolly regret that yurr seeing me like this tamorow, ya know,” you call over the blaring music. “It’s cute, you’re cute,” he assures as he leans against the bar, “I didn’t know you thought about me this much until I saw all the snapchats and voice messages and texts.” You cover your face in humiliation, “I knowww, I’m sorry but you were on my mind a lot, alot alot, and  couldn’t stop think about ya, and the booze told me to keep on messaging…” You trail off,  finding the last shred of your filter to keep you from talking.  The bartender hands you your water and you take a long drink.

“Iwaizumi,” a voice projects over the baseline. Ushijima stands tall advancing towards where you both stand. His expression is neutral though, his eyes keep darting to you and then back to Iwaizumi. Ushijima is dressed as a knight, his silver mask hangs languidly around his neck. “Ushiwaka,” Iwa acknowledges, “this is a hell of a birthday party.” You giggle and point at Ushiwaka, “he’s 28 today; getting sooo old.” In that moment, Iwaizumi watches him do something he had never seen him do before. Smile… and then laugh. Ushijima wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you closer.  “You’re just a baby,  you’re only-” You wave your hand in front of Ushiwaka’s face, shushing him. “No, no, Iwa doesn’t knowww, don’t tell him,” you plead. “She’s only 23,” Ushiwaka says. You hold your face in your hands once more and groan. Ushijima pulls your hands from your face, “just barely twenty three too.” You glare at him and look back at Iwaizumi embarrassed.  “Did she not tell you her age?” Ushijima asks Iwaizumi. Iwa shrugs, “She didn’t, but I never asked,” Iwa shrugs casually, addressing you now, “didn’t seem important since you carry yourself so well.”

You turn to Iwa, mouth open like you’re about to respond but Ushijima swipes the glass from your hands before you can finish. “Drinking water?” You look up at him. “But it’s my birthday… and this is a party…  you need something stronger…” Ushijima beacons the bartender with a single flick of his hand. The barman pours three double shots of a clear liquid from a foreign looking bottle. Ushijima takes a glass and hands it to you, before handing another to Iwaizumi. Ushijima gives him a wink as he loops his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him. He raises his glass, the violet lights illuminating the liquid. Iwaizumi follows his lead. “To my Juliet, the belle of the ball,” Ushijima bellows. You smile slightly and shake your head. “No no, to you Ushi, it’s your birthday, not mine, we are celebrating you!” Your eyes find Iwa’s, but you leave your glass raised. Ushijima grabs hold of your hand that’s still wrapped around the glass. “Cheers,” He tips the glass towards your lips and you swallow the clear liquor as he feeds it to you. You down it all in one go and Ushiwaka smiles wide once again. “She’s good, huh?” With that, Ushiwaka clinks his glass to Iwaizumi’s, “to you brother,” he assures. Iwa is surprised with the sudden sentiment. “And to you,” he replies before downing the shot. The liquor is surprisingly smooth, expensive, and strong. Iwa can feel his head starting to get light from the small portion that was in the glass and Iwa wasn’t a light weight. “Strong huh?” Ushijima smirks. Iwaizumi nods then turns to the bartender to signal for a water.

Ushijima turns to where you stand swaying slightly with the music. “Look at her, she gets drunk so easily,” Ushijima smiles. “How are you feeling, princess?” he shouts over at you. Iwa turns away and downs his water in disgust. ‘Princess?’ Ushijima shouldn’t be calling you that if you’re both just friends. You blink and give him a smile and a thumbs up. There was a natural innocence about you, a childlike wonder and curiosity, the embodiment of sanguine. Ushijima’s air was sometimes sinister, like he was taking advantage of your natural trusting nature. Iwa watches as Ushijima’s large hands rest on either of your shoulders and he pushes you back and forth like a pendulum between his palms. You giggle and try to push him away, “Ushi stooopp.” He laughs with you and continues pushing you around, “you’re so cute and small though, see?” He places a hand on top of your head and you still. “I said to stop,” you mumble. “And I did,” he retorts before letting you go.

Iwa watches the sudden weight of gravity find you as you stumble in your heels. He catches your arm just in time. Your arms find their way around his neck once more, your face in the crook of his neck. You pull away and Iwa examines your foggy eyes. “You okay?” You nod, pushing off of Iwa’s chest. You fix your hair, “it’s fine, he just messin’” you turn to Ushijima, “and someone doesn’t know when to quit.” You’re pulled away into Ushiwaka’s arms. He sways you back and forth, your back held against his chest while he says soft apologies. He whispers something to you and you nod. Iwaizumi wanted to pull you away from him. Not because he was jealous, but because the way that Ushiwaka was behaving with you was odd.

“Y/n is a little bit tired, why don’t you join us in VIP?” Iwa smiles and gives his thanks, trying his best to hide his scowl. Iwa follows after you and Ushiwaka, upstairs and under velvet ropes hoping that he will find a good moment to pull you away. But instead you are pulled onto the couch beside Ushiwaka. He lights a cigar and offers one to Iwa, but Iwaizumi declines with a simple, “no thanks, don’t smoke.” It’s strange the way that Ushiwaka keeps whispering in your ear, giving you sips of his drinks, and blowing smoke in your face. “Ushi, stop please, the smell is making me sick,” you whine. But he just pulls you closer to him, chuckling all the while and does it again. You’re laughing and poking his face, but it’s not out of joy... Watching Ushijima interact with you the whole night has been like watching a cat toy with a mouse.

Iwa grimaces when Ushiwaka tickles you. “Stop-stop-don’t-stop,” you giggle and howl. “She said to stop!” Iwa raises his voice. Ushijima’s eyes shoot towards Iwaizumi while you squirm off the couch. Your eyes are heavy as you walk towards a dark hallway and disappear into the shadows. Iwa’s eyes flick to the entrance to the hall. Ushiwaka sits in a contented silence, sipping a drink, “she’s so dramatic,” he sighs. He continues smoking, arm rested over the back of the purple velvet sofa. Ushijima takes a sip of his drink, swirling the ice in his glass. Iwa doesn’t move to break the silence no matter how expectant Ushijima’s expression was. He stamps out his cigar in the tray before addressing him.

“She’s awfully talkative, and incredibly fond of you…” Ushijima starts, an odd smirk painting his expression. Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow in intrigue and Ushijima’s face hardens. “She won’t shut up about you since she met you… it’s annoying...” Iwaizumi, remains quiet, the silence settling over the men like a thick fog. The only sounds are muffled club music and the ice tinkling against Ushijima’s glass. “I’m going to be honest as a friend… bad idea.” Iwaizumi can feel the rage bubbling inside his gut, “I don’t think that what’s going on between us is any of your-” He’s cut off by Ushijima.

“I’m really looking out for you Iwaizumi, girls can break hearts and Y/n is kind of known for that… she’s just a sweet soul, makes friends easily, but love? That’s harder for her… doesn’t have the best taste in men I’m afraid, I want to protect her and you from a situation where I can already see the conclusion… I get that you like her, everyone does.”  Iwazumi leans forward, “does that include you?” Ushijima is stone faced, then gives a cold laugh. “You’re funnier than I remember, Iwaizumi.”

Iwaizumi rises and heads towards the hall you disappeared down. If he sat in front of him any longer he was going to say something he regretted… and you still haven’t come back. He slips into the dark hallway as you’re exiting the bathroom. Your mask has been removed and even in the dim lighting you look pale. “Hey, what’s happened?” You look up at him embarrassed, your dress almost as wilted as you are. “Got sick…” you mutter. You’re shaking slightly, arms wrapped around yourself. “Oh Y/n, are you alright?” he sighs. His arm starts to reach for you but he thinks better of it, pulling it back to rest by his side. His eyes widen as he feels the warmth of your hand in his. He didn’t figure that you would want to be touched right now. But your fingers interlace with his,  your skin soft. “Are you good to drive?” you whisper. His hand instinctively tightens around yours protectively. “I only had whatever Ushijima gave us, it was strong but I’ve had water- yeah I’m good.” “Would you mind taking me home?” you ask, as you start to walk back towards the VIP room. “Sure, course,” Iwaizumi replies gently. He feels how your thumb brushes over the back of his hand in silent gratitude. The gesture has his heart beating hard against his ribs. Iwa walks forward, his eyes on you and nothing else. Your brow is furrowed and your expression painted serious which was unusual from how he knew you to act.

“Iwa’s taking me home now,” you announce and walk towards the stairs. Ushiwaka’s face hardens, “I can take her home, you shouldn’t trouble yourself,” he addresses Iwaizumi. You smile and turn around facing Ushiwaka. “But Ushi, ‘s ur birthday, you can’t leave this party jus’ ‘a take me home,” You turn to Iwa now. “Let’s go,” you say and Iwa nods, still holding your hand.  “Where’s my hug, princess?” Ushijima calls after you. You stop in your tracks and close your eyes, taking in a deep breath. You drop Iwa’s hand slowly, hesitantly. You walk back slowly and stand before his open arms. He lifts you and you groan. You’re still hugging him tightly but not quite with the same intimacy as before.

As Ushijima places you down you turn to look back at Iwa when Ushijima catches your face with his large hand. He coaxes your face back towards him then leans down. Ushiwaka locks eyes with Iwaizumi as he whispers something in your ear. Then he presses his lips to your cheek, still not moving his eyes away from Iwaizumi’s. Iwa tries his best to remain neutral but he can feel his lip creeping upwards in contempt. Ushiwaka is too prideful for his own good it seems.

You take Iwa’s hand again, leading him towards the exit. An exasperated look rests on your face. “What did he say to you?” Iwa asks. You sigh and shake your head. “‘S nothin’,  ya shouldn’t worry your pretty lil head ‘bout it.” Iwa can’t help but allow a smile. He raises an eyebrow at you, “think my head is pretty?” he asks. He’s met with your hazy gaze, “I do,” you say simply. Iwa wasn’t prepared for such a straightforward answer to his question.

Once out of the club, the valet pull Iwaizumi’s car around. He’s careful not to let you walk too far on your own. Sick, in those ridiculous shoes and still quite drunk, he opens the car door for you before hopping into the driver's seat. “Will you put your address in?” Iwa hands you his phone and you type it in as asked. “Thanks for doing this,” you sigh. “Yeah of course,” he says as he puts the car into gear. A few streets of city light pass by in silence. Your hands are resting in your lap but your body is still trembling. “I can- umm- pull over if you need me to…” You wave the thought away with your hand, “it was the smell of the cigar more than anything…” Iwa’s gut begins to boil again. Your voice is soft, almost defeated. He speaks before thinking better of it. “Does he always treat you like that?” You look at Iwa and make eye contact briefly before his attention is back on the road. “He was being a little extra weird today, maybe because y’all used to play volleyball together or… I dunno really, he just gets like that sometimes…” You trail off, allowing your thoughts to fade into the rearview. The silence is deafening and you feel the need to break it. “He’s really nice too though, don’t get me wrong, he cooks for me and calls to check in, he even gets me little gifts, so I know he cares.” Iwa shakes his head, “if he cared he would have stopped when you asked him to.” You take a breath, “I know but he was just having a night I guess…” Iwa pulls into your driveway as the GPS notifies him that he has ‘arrived at the destination’. He puts the car in park, “you don’t have to make excuses for him… it’s okay to be angry, if that’s how you feel.” You start to open the door, your fingers on the handle. “I’m not angry though, I’m just kinda hurt.” You open the door and start to get out, “okay, maybe a little angry too.” You laugh to yourself but not out of joy. It’s an ironic laugh and Iwa can hear the pain ringing inside of it. “Let me walk you inside.”  

[bytedykes]

for send me ship thing

klave (ha!)

i cant believe you've done this utiforuewifds

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did:

uhhhh idk i used to ship it but i don't as much now? i think i shipped them maybe like,,, a couple weeks or so after i finished watching tua s1, so somewhere late 2019 probably whjekfsdk

my thoughts:

ok i typed out like 500 words of my thoughts on klave but i know if i actually post them i'll get shanked so. uhuwehwehksjdfh klave can be good but i hate the fandom's general interpretation of it and it's kind of been ruined for me, so now the only klave content i trust is my own ✊😩 askdjfjkdsk

What makes me happy about them:

all of those no powers aus where theyre just being happy together <3 the domesticity hits hard!!! also i love klaus' "klaus loves dave" tat that is literally so 🥺🥺🥺

What makes me sad about them:

*hand waves* GHWIEJHSFIUYWEHISHDFK

ugh its so good tho. makes me sob so hard but its SO GOOD. the immediate scene when klaus appears back in 2019 with the briefcase and mary plays... UGH 👌 so cinema so makes me cry

things done in fanfic that annoys me:

oh my god mandy its like u sent me this ask specifically so i'd answer honestly and get ripped apart by the tua fandom akjjwsdkf

idk i havent read any tua fic in like a year and def not since s2 came out so. what i remember rlly pissed me off is the gross oversimplification of their personalities + the outright fetishization of them as the Token (white) Queer Ship and ok really just everything ppl usually write as far as i remember uefuihskhsd

which isnt to say i havent read good klave fic 😭 i have kadskks

things I look for in fanfic:

re: me not having read tua fic in over a year

but when i do read it i look for ppl not oversimplifying (or outright misconstruing) klaus' personality, and actually putting some thought into dave's jkkjsfd

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

nobody rip, dave is super important to klaus' growth and character development and we dont know enough about dave rn for him to have a viable love interest aside from klaus jhksds

My happily ever after for them:

DAVE LIVES,,, KLAUS BRINGS HIM TO 2019,,, THE FIRST APOCALYPSE DOESN'T HAPPEN,,, THEY LIVE TOGETHER AND HAVE A STABLE, MUTUALLY FULFILLING, LOVING RELATIONSHIP,,, also a dog :)

who is the big spoon/little spoon:

lol they switch

dave is usually the little spoon but if either of them has a nightmare or flashback it's the other way around, bc klaus needs to be held when he's vulnerable like that, and when it's dave he needs to know he is capable of protecting

what is their favorite non-sexual activity:

COOKING TOGETHER,,,, WHILE LISTENING TO MUSIC,,,, and dancing around the kitchen :)) also eating out <3

send me a ship/character/five characters [link]

[mermaidcashton]

all the pretty girls

author: claire (@mermaidcashton) ship/AU: calum hood/luke hemmings, genderswap!AU prompt: “Kissing you is all I’ve thought about since the moment we met.”  wordcount: 1519 warnings: swearing, hint of sexual content  dedication: this one is for gay!sos group chat, and all the other wlw 5sos fans 💘 a/n: • so, i wanted wlw!5sos and established relationship, self-indulgent, domestic cuteness and i...think i have achieved that? lol • written for @maluminspace & @h0tsos​ ‘s 5sos fic writers collab (in which we all chose from a list of AU’s and had the above prompt quote to include - i will share the masterlist for you to see everyone elses when it’s finished!) • i do not give permission for this (or any of my writing) to be reposted, by anyone, on this or any other website. please don’t do it! • title from ‘honey’ by kehlani 

all the pretty girls ***

all the pretty girls in the world but i'm in this space with you 

***

“Kissing you is all I’ve thought about since the moment we met.” “Oh!” Luke gasped, burying her head further into Calum’s shoulder. Calum was bemused. “Haven’t you seen this movie like ten times?” “Fuck,I think I’ve seen this movie ten times.” Calum would be seriously questioning her life choices if she hadn’t taken into account that every time she’d ever watched it, she’d had the hottest woman she’d ever met pressed against her. That seriously balanced the scales of shitty cinema, in Calum’s opinion. 

“It’s just so cute.” Luke sniffed. Calum pretended not to notice her wiping her nose on Calum’s sleeve; she looked cute enough in it to get away with almost anything.

Right now Luke was wearing avocado print pyjama shorts and Calum’s Santa Cruz sweatshirt (despite owning at least 300 separate items of clothing, in Calum’s most conservative estimations), with her blonde hair in a messy bun and the beginnings of a snotty nose. Her eyelashes were glossy with the tears she’d brushed away, and Calum thought she’d still be willing to watch every straight-to-video 00’s rom com ever made as long as it was what Luke wanted. 

“Does this seriously not make you emotional? He gave up Paris for her! Paris, Calum!” Luke whined, craning her neck to look up at Calum from her position under her arm, her lithe body laid across the sofa.  

Calum smirked. “Come on, babe; you know ‘Wall-E’ is the only movie that makes me feel anything.”

Luke rolled her eyes, but giggled all the same before pressing on insistently.  “It’s so romantic, though. Isn’t this the most romantic thing you’ve ever heard?” “No?” Calum scoffed, settling back against the mountain of cushions that seemed to grow every time they went to Ikea. Then it struck her. “Hang on, are you saying that’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever heard?!” 

“Yeah…” Luke let out another dreamy sigh before stilling almost imperceptibly. Oh, shit.

“What?!” Calum said, already looking more indignant than the time Luke had accidentally cheered for Arsenal insead of Liverpool (“Your Liverpool shirt is red, Calum! What the hell is an away kit?! I hate football!”). “Obviously I wasn’t includi-” Luke tried to recover, but Calum was too far gone. “I write the sickest anniversary cards! My last Valentine’s Day card to you? Fuckin’ poetry, Luke! I mean, not literally because that’s lame as fuck, but I am romantic as shit!”

Calum knew that generally speaking, people would consider Luke to be the more romantic in the relationship. Everyone who lived within 5 miles of their apartment had probably heard Luke tell Calum she loved her, or seen her entwine their hands, or pout her lips for a kiss she had to have right that second, at least twice. She was more prone to posting photos of Calum on Instagram with captions that ranged from sweet to thirsty as hell. Every time she attempted to bake for Calum, it would almost always be using a heart-shaped mould or cutter she’d found at the pound shop down the street. And at Calum’s gigs, everyone always knew exactly where she was in the crowd because Luke was yelling about the incredibly sexy bassist with the best basslines in the history of bass at every possible moment. 

However, Calum thought her own brand of romance of just as valid, and Luke seemed to like it. Calum was a fan of surprising Luke with flowers, albeit wild bouquets of sunflowers and daisies rather than roses or peonies (“Wildflowers for my Wildflower.”), and of playing records on vinyl that she thought Luke would like - or that reminded her of her girlfriend - while they ate a dinner Calum had made from scratch because she’d seen a recipe online that she knew Luke would love. Calum also trusted Luke in a way that was rare for her, and lying in the dark of the their bedroom, speaking out loud things she’d never told anyone - childhood memories of her parents messy divorce, her deepest fears, greatest dreams, biggest secrets - whilst her girlfriend rubbed comforting circles over her hip and placed gentle kisses on her shoulder, felt intimate and special in a way Calum hoped Luke felt was romantic. And like she said - her card writing skills were sick.     

Luke sat up on the sofa, freeing herself from underneath Calum’s arm. She clicked the pause button on the remote, dropping it onto the rug as she threw her hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry, I take it back; you are the most romantic I only meant in, like, movies and stuff! Obviously you are the most romantic and beautiful and I love you!”

Calum sniffed, trying to keep her sad face on without breaking. “Obviously not, as I don’t have a European city to not go to for you…”  Luke saw her girlfriend’s mouth twitch at the corner. Right. She tucked her long legs underneath herself, settling back on the sofa as she spoke. “Like I said, I take it back - I was wrong.” 

Calum could count on one hand the amount of time she had heard Luke say those three words during their relationship, and was ready to celebrate a substantial victory, until she clocked the smile spreading across Luke’s face that spelled trouble.

Luke continued in a purposely casual voice. “The actual most romantic thing I’ve ever heard was on our third date, when you drank all those daiquiris and told me that one day you were gonna ‘fucking wife me’.” Calum groaned and tried to sink back into the sofa so it could swallow her whole; this plan was thwarted by all the Ikea cushions.

“Shut up, that wasn’t me. You must have me confused with your other girlfriend. I don’t even drink daiquiris.” Luke’s distinctive laugh filled Calum’s ears; she loved that sound (it was in her top 3 sounds that Luke made), but right now she felt so embarrassed at the memory of her nerves getting the better of her in a Tapas restaurant that she couldn’t really enjoy it.

“Maybe not anymore! But Ashton told me how much of the morning after you spent with your head in the toilet, so I guess it makes sense you gave them up.” Luke teased, her blue eyes bright with mischief.

“I hate Ashton.” Calum mumbled, with nowhere near as much heat as was currently in her cheeks.

Luke’s giggles had taken on a unmistakable air of victory; Calum could not let this stand.

“Right, that’s it; we’re watching ‘Pulp Fiction’!” Calum declared, leaning down to feel around on the floor in the dimly lit living room for the remote where Luke had abandoned it. “Noooo!” Luke whined, reaching out to grab Calum’s wrists as she rose in triumph. “Cal!” She pouted as she missed entirely. It had always made Calum laugh when Luke tried to overpower her in any way; she was clumsy, and she wasn’t quick or strong enough to get the jump on Calum, unless she cheated (which she often did). In the past, Calum had hoped Luke wouldn’t notice the way she clenched her thighs together when the blonde would wiggle against her, bite her lip, whine or pant. Inevitably, as their relationship had continued, Luke had become fully aware of the effect she had on Calum, and now employed her sexuality as a weapon against Calum whenever she deemed it necessary. Nowadays, she tended to cut to the chase, as she was now. Calum barely registered the remote being extracted from her slackening grip as Luke held the grey sweatshirt and her cropped pyjama top up above her chin with one hand. She did register Luke’s small but perfectly formed tits, and wondered briefly what they had been talking about. Luke didn’t let her clothes drop back down to cover her breasts until she’d already unpaused the movie and stashed the remote underneath the armrest on her side of the sofa. 

“That...was savage.” Calum deadpanned, shaking her head as she clambered to her feet. Luke put on her most innocent smile (which was not that innocent if you knew her as well as Calum did). “Do you want another drink?” “Yes please, gorgeous.” Luke replied with her eyes still fixed to the screen, her lips moving in the time with the actress on screen with the dodgy bangs. Calum rolled her eyes fondly before making her way to their small kitchen in search of rosé.

She didn’t notice it until she closed the fridge again, but Luke had responded. 

Earlier in the day, Luke had used their alphabet fridge magnets to spell out ‘BUY MORE MILK’. Upon seeing this just after lunch, Calum had immediately checked she had the right letters to arrange the obvious reply; ‘NO FUCK U’, giggling to herself the whole time she’d been doing it. She let out a snort, picking up the personalised wine glasses Michael had gifted them when they moved in together. She set off back towards the living room, idly thinking about what movie she was going to demand they put on when this torture was over.

‘NO U’.

***

my masterlist   • please let me know what you think of wlw!cake and if you would like to see more of them here!

[kvngjoong]

mingi + nsfw a-z

you can tell who my bias is after this, but i’m not apologising. I actually considered myself a soft mingi stan but after this i’m not sure. If this is how i see mingi, my soft baby, idk what hongjoong’s is gonna be like

A: Aftercare

he probably wouldn’t know what to do really, but he would make an attempt. honestly the aftercare would be more centred on him and making sure he is okay bc he is smol and needs to be cared for. but he would still check you’re okay and honestly, the majority of aftercare with mingi is you both making sure all is good, cleaning up a little and probably doing something dumb afterwards like nothing even happened

B: Body part

he likes his shoulders because you like them and for him that’s a big plus. he really likes it when you leave marks on him there because it’s sensitive and because he likes to have a hand in your hair as you straddle him and tell him that he’s a good boy. as for you, he really likes how generally small you are compared to him and that you can still put him in his place and tell him what to do. also probably likes your ass/tiddies since he’s a bit of a newbie

C: Cum

he cums more than the average guy, but he’s good at listening to you and wants to please you, so whatever you want him to do with it, that will happen. he’s a fan of cumming either in your mouth, or on your chest - but he regrets telling you that because now you only let him do that if you think he’s been good enough

D: Dirty Secret

he kinda, really, wants you to choke him. he’s not sure how to approach it, mostly because it’s a topic that isn’t the easiest to approach (and he’s not just gonna say btw babe can you choke me tonight). he tries to encourage it a bit, he’s extra loud when you’re rough with him and you bite him a little harder, but he really wants you to just put your hands around his neck and choke him a little. he would literally cum on the spot

E: Experience

he seems like he would be one of the least experienced in ateez, but that might be wrong. like, he knows what everything is and probably knows about the whole dom/sub thing (hence why he knows he’s a sub, and automatically subs when you guys first do the yanno) but he’s yet to have actually tried a lot of it

F: Favourite Position

as long as you’re on top, he is very content. he likes seeing you bounce on him, so cowgirl or reverse cowgirl is a preference of his that you’re happy to oblige to. he rarely tops (that doesn’t mean he can’t) but when he does he likes it too because he thinks it’s more intimate and again, he likes how small you are underneath him (he can take care of you sometimes, too). so it depends on the mood he’s in, really

G: Goofy

he can be, but he’s not usually. when he’s in a sub mindset he’s there to please you and listen to you. if it’s less of a dom/sub situation, he isn’t impartial to crack a joke here or there, or make you laugh over some weird ass comment he makes. he feels comfortable with you and it shows in his actions. he will mostly roll of your energy though, so if you’re in the mood to take things less seriously, so will he

H: Hair

probably doesn’t shave or manscape, just kinda leaves it. he didn’t know what to do with it so thought doing nothing was the answer, which is fine

I: Intimacy

he can be intimate, but it’s not always. there are special times when he is extra soft and just wants to hold you, which lead to sex and he will top and that will be soft and he will tell you that he loves you and stuff, but that is occasionally and not each time. that isn’t to say there is no intimacy in everything that’s done - he knows that there is love and trust behind everything you do together

J: Jack Off

this is talked about more for yearning, but mingi has been taught by you that to be a good sub he needs to ask you for permission and wait for you before he does anything. he would get a bit of a guilty conscience, especially if you’ve been together a while, if he was to jack off without you giving him permission to do so. this isn’t always the case and he will still occasionally succumb to his urges and run to the bathroom, especially when you’re not around or you’re busy and he needs some relief

K: Kink

considering that, when i started writing san’s version of this, i had to stop to write size difference in all caps on mingi’s version, i think that it is pretty clear mingi has a thing for how small people are next to him. not just height, his everything is big. but he’s also a massive sub. like the biggest sub in ateez. he isn’t a power bottom, he just wants to please and he’s all ears for what you want him to do. he probably doesn’t have it in him to actually dom unless you teach him how to (and maybe he would enjoy that, but he would always be too afraid to actually dom you). other than that, he would be pretty vanilla - but he’s game for anything you want to introduce. he would be pretty vocal if he didn’t like something and he’s not afraid to use the safe word for the reason you introduced it. he wants to please you, but he’s not gonna do something he’s not comfortable with - not that he actually doesn’t like that much in the end, anyway

L: Location

prefers the privacy of his/your own home, though is open to anywhere with a locked door or at least some cover from other people seeing. his favourite is and always will be when you’re at home and things are comfortable. it gives you both some breathing space and you’re free to do whatever you want to, without the real world distractions and people disturbing

M: Motivation

kind of typical stuff, really - likes it when you send him pictures to tease him, and sometimes it’s a though that pops into his head and he’ll tell you the thought in the hopes you will incorporate it. when he’s bored his mind might drift off and he’ll recall when you did something he really likes and he’ll remember it for later. he initiates things quite a bit, since it doesn’t take all that much for him to get going

N: NO

one time you suggest a threesome to mingi and he was umming and ahhing about it for a while, but after careful consideration he realised that he really doesn’t like it for two reasons: he wants you to himself and he is pretty shy and doesn’t particularly want anyone involved in what he’s doing. nothing personal on them, he just doesn’t anyone involved in activities like this unless its you (because he loves you), nor does he want to see you treat anyone like you treat him. he won’t be told otherwise

O: Oral

loves when you suck him off but knows that you’re not always gonna do that unless he asks really nicely (or he’s done something that impresses you, turns you on, or pleases you) so it isn’t the most regular thing - as in, it does happen, but not every day or anything since you both can do foreplay in loads of different ways, and when it does happen he really enjoys it. also likes giving because he likes when you pull his hair and likes getting you off, too. does he have some kind of pain kink? probably. likes it when you pull his hair hard

P: Pace

you control the pace, not him. he likes it slow and then fast towards the end, but he told you that and now you use it against him. whatever you’re in the mood for - you’re in control with him

Q: Quickie

not impartial to them, happy to be part of one, but prefers it not to be. he doesn’t mind when you give him head under the table, but since he’s a sub it’s a bit more difficult for a quickie between the two of you. unless you’re telling him exactly what to do and you’re instructing him specifically on picking you up, pushing you against the door and rawing you, then there’s not much else to do

R: Risk

the poor bby does not want someone walking in on him, despite his confidence. mostly because he shows his sub side to you and only you. it would be weird if one of his hyungs (especially 98 line) ever caught him being your sub. so he likes to do things away from people he knows. he’s not so bothered if there’s a risk of someone he doesn’t know catching him, like one of your friends that he doesn’t know. so maybe you could get away with a cinema hand job

S: Stamina

i keep saying that they are performers so can go for a while, but mingi is on the same level as san when it comes to stamina - he can go a couple of rounds and then still go out afterwards to get food or whatever. he has a lot of energy and usually doesn't use it all during sex. he may, however, get kinda tired during overstimulation and whilst he will ask you for more, he can barely keep his eyes open and he does kinda just wanna lay down for two minutes so he can collect himself. whatever you want him to do though, he can and will do it

T: Toy

he’s not the biggest fan? but he honestly doesn’t have a preference. if you like using them on him then it’s cool, as long as you tell him first and don’t surprise him with it. when it comes to you it’s a bit of a different story. one time you ask him to use one on you and he has no idea what to do with it, but with some instructions he’s got it down and knows what he’s doing. he liked watching you get off but he’s not sure if he’ll do it again because he knows you asked him to use it instead of him getting you off himself. he has a love hate relationship with them

U: Unfair

he’s not a tease at all, at least not intentionally. he does it more as a joke and he takes pride in knowing that you think he’s really fucking hot when he’s performing. however that doesn’t mean he will do things intentionally to tease you. he usually does it to show off to you (like, baby check out my abs on national television) or to get some kind of reaction from you. he won’t admit to it, but he does kind of like it when you tease him. he likes the build up

V: Volume

he’s loud, and there’s no stopping him on that. he will usually whine and moan, but he’s talkative too. more so than most. he doesn’t ever talk back to you but usually he will be happy to answer you and you will never have to ask him to use his words because he’s way too eager to not speak. even when he’s laying back against the headboard and you’re overstimulating him, he’ll still have it in him to ask for more (he will never say stop)

W: Wild Card

mingi likes to be told what to do. he wants to please you so appreciates the help that you give when you tell him how he can get you off, however when it comes to eating you out he likes to take a bit of the control away from you. he goes off when he’s giving head, he loves how sweet you taste and he will always find it in him to put all of his effort into pleasing you, without needing you to tell him what to do and when to do it. he watched videos and everything on how he can improve. like before, he does really like it when you pull his hair and the feeling of the pain, like when you bite him or leave marks on him, turns him on way more and keeps him going for longer. he will probably tell you he likes it in the hopes you’ll do it more often

X: X-Ray

look, there’s a video which is pretty clear, so it doesn’t need much explaining - you know my thoughts on this given how big he is

Y: Yearning

he’s probably a bit more on the needier side. he needs a lot of attention in general, but this also applies to sex. he can go a while without anything from you if it’s completely unavoidable, but if you’re both free then he’ll be wondering why you’re not together? that being said, he does have a lot of self control, mostly that you taught him, and he can be patient when needed. it’s a wonderful ability you’ve taught him, because now when you send him pics on snapchat he isn’t having to run to the bathroom (mostly because you told him he can’t do that without permission, but that’s another story)

Z: ZZZ

he doesn’t often sleep straight after sex, mostly because he’s a ball of energy that can’t be contained and afterwards he would be super talkative and just want to chat shit with you about whatever. even if you’re just laying there he will find something to talk about. if you’re up for it though, he is down for a late night/early morning walk (or smth cute like sitting on the balcony or window sill looking up at the stars talking about space and life etc)

[theartoflovingthomashunt]

Seducing Mr. Perfect

[Red Carpet Diaries Masterlist]  ||  [Hollywood U Masterlist]

Characters: Alex, Thomas Hunt, King Liam (mentioned), Drake Walker (mentioned) Rating: Teen + Notes: Alex has a new favorite film (and so do I). > @choicesjanuarychallenge2020​​​ Photograph  > Thanks to @the-soot-sprite​​​ for the idea! 

– – – –

Alex’s eyes were transfixed to her laptop screen as she sat in bed watching Seducing Mr. Perfect. She didn’t hear or see Thomas come home from work nor try to get her attention. 

Thomas stood next to the bed for a moment, watching her. She was completely enthralled by the story and this wasn’t the first time he’d heard her watching the same movie this week. 

Thomas’s movement from crawling into the bed startled her, causing her to close the laptop quickly, her cheeks blushing. “Oh, hi there.”

“Hello, beautiful,” Thomas kissed her softly but with determination. He held her face with one hand as his other hand opened her computer back up while she was distracted.

“Should I be jealous?” Thomas asked noting the shirtless man that popped up.  

Alex sighed contently seeing a photograph of Henney’s face paused on the screen. That smirk. Those eyes. That chest.

“You don’t have to answer.” Thomas’s lips brushed against her neck before pressing down on the spot he knew was her most sensitive causing her eyes to close and her body to shiver beneath his touch. “You may have been looking at him, but you’re still in my bed.”

“You’re not mad?” Alex guided his mouth off her neck so she could see him. “I can’t say I would be this calm had the situations been reversed.” 

“Should I not be?” Thomas held her gaze. 

Alex’s eyes wandered Thomas’s body, realizing only now that he was wearing nothing but underwear. She shook her head as she bit her lip. 

“My love’s not fragile,” Thomas smirked at the growing need in her eyes. He knew he had nothing to worry about. “If anything I’m less worried about him, and more worried about Liam.”

“Liam?” Alex questioned.

“Last we were in Cordonia filming The Last Duchess, King Liam was out of the country. You didn’t get to meet him. May I?” Thomas questioned reaching for Alex’s laptop. He quickly pulled up a photo of the King. “As you can see, Liam bears more than a passing resemblance.”

“That’s uncanny,” Alex marveled, her eyes widening as she stared at a photo of King Liam that could easily have been Daniel Henney. She felt a warmth growing in her cheeks again. 

“I take no stock in the doppelgänger mythology, however, it is impossible to ignore this pair,” Thomas explained. “Will his presence at our wedding be too much of a distraction?”

“I’m not sure how to respond to that.” Alex shook her head forcing herself to look away from the image. “The King of Cordonia who looks like Daniel Henney is coming to our wedding and this is the first I’m hearing about it?! I don’t see how a King himself is not going to draw attention, and then one that looks like Henney...”

“Is that a yes? I can uninvite him,” Thomas began. “It would save a whole table at the reception since he seems incapable of traveling anywhere without his merry band of misfit friends. I particularly would not miss Mr. Walker and his assumption that he knows more about Scotch than anyone. I mean really! And the way he’s always complaining.”

“Sounds a bit like you,” Alex teased. Her fingers caressing the stubble on his cheek. “If I’m being honest, I’m not sure I’ll notice anyone besides you on our wedding day. I am counting the minutes til I am yours, forever. I want you, Thomas, only you.” 

“Even if a look-alike to Mr. Perfect is sitting in the front row?” Thomas raised an eyebrow. 

Alex threw him a curious glance. 

“I’ve seen the movie, Alex,” Thomas acknowledged. “Lest we forget, I am a connoisseur of cinema. While less than perfect, the film is passable, which is far more than I can say for most romance films. I even referenced it in a few lectures before when I was a professor as a film to study when attempting to create a romance or build dynamic chemistry.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t understand the ‘less than perfect’ part. Those words seem to be incorrectly placed together,” Alex blinked repeatedly, refusing to accept them, even if that was higher praise from Thomas than most films ever received.

“Do you have any idea how cute you really are?” Thomas offered, his lips curling into a devilish smirk.

“Perhaps you should remind me.” Alex’s finger traced down his taut chest. 

“I shall do more than that, my love.” Thomas’s hands glided over her caressing, squeezing and rubbing as he spoke. “I intend to remind you who you belong to. After all, does Mr. Perfect know your body the way I do? Does he know how to make you moan and cry? Shiver and Squirm? Beg and scream in pleasure? I am not concerned about Daniel Henney or King Liam. When I’m done with you and I’ve had you begging for more and writhing in pleasure from my every touch over and over again, you won’t remember who they are. I will be all that you remember. You’re mine, Alex.”

“Pretty big talk,” Alex teased, her body already tingling from the commanding power behind his words and the way his touches reflected every word he said. 

"You're more beautiful than any woman I've ever met in my life,” Thomas kissed her tenderly. He closed the laptop and moved it to their end table. He opened the top drawer and took out a blindfold. “Sensory deprivation. Now every touch will be amplified and unpredictable.”

Alex nodded as Thomas wrapped it around her eyes. She hated not seeing him, but the experience was always more than worth it. Plus, it made seeing him at the end even more explosive. 

“Love is a game of power, a manipulation of emotions. Are you ready?" Thomas questioned as he began undressing his fianceé without waiting for her response. 

“You want to kiss me now, don’t you?” Alex breathed grinning with adoration. 

“You’ll just have to wait and see… well, feel,” Thomas taunted as his lips pressed against her collarbone, teeth grazing across her skin. The shift in her breathing and soft moans escaping her lips were all he needed. He would happily seduce her tonight and every night to keep her happy. She was his future wife, his entire world, and his personal Miss (soon to be Mrs.) Perfect.

_ _ _ _

Thomas Tags: @the-soot-sprite​​ ;  @alleksa16​​  ;  @hopelessromantic1352​​  ;   @flyawayboo​​ ; @mfackenthal​​   ; @lilyofchoices​​   ;  @alj4890​​  ;  @twin-skltns​​   ;    @ab1901​​ ;   @riseandshinelittleblossom​​  ;  @thearianam​​   ; @choicesjanuarychallenge2020​​, @trappedinfandoms; @awkwardambition

[odechambeau]

There’s not a super lot of Odette content known so I’m gonna go over the quiz and provide details too!

It’s one that Emily gave her when she was a child. I’ve had the image of her leaning on her hands and knees over it, just watching the music box spin. Hmnnn I know I liked the thought of it being a glass piano like this, but in my mind it’d been a carousel. One with horses that go up and down as it twirls... could have more than one but hmnnn. It’s an old thing by now, but she still enjoys it greatly. Might also play that Sing Sweet Nightingale son g, or whatever Emily sung/hummed to babies. I’m positive she has all of those mentioned above though.

Recently had the image of her picking it up and dusting it off too. Like by all means let servants take care of cleaning, but ,, not this. This she will care for alone. 

I’m glad you all got light blue like! When I first imagined Odette, there was this picture in mind. She’s been almost yearning for blue hair since. I think it’s something that needs to be more awakened in her though? Like ah, people actually do have those colored hairs? And I like the idea of her getting it dyed as an adult! I have many pictures on pinterest with different shades of blue that she likes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 

Speaking of hair, bangs are the bane of my existence, and Odette hates being compared to Adora so like I think she wears her hair higher now? and parts her hair the opposite way of adora, kinda like Kaoru and Hikaru! I go ah though because she super vibed at this, so perhaps it’s a little straighter at the top and then spiral curls. She likes this and this too. She really won’t tell me if it’s older her thoug h, because adult her kinda vibes t o o. especially with twin buns and things so g e h.  I gotta try and draw her again but shhh

She was gonna li e, but thought she could trick even more if she didn’t!! Haha~ Unfortunately it was unsuccessful, but perhaps next time ! 

She’s not the best at being thoughtful or anything but she gave Theodore one once in winter for his room. He can have a beautiful plant indoors now!! Not that they don’t have many more too probably but!! She just resonates with the light purple and light blue colors. She gave it to him but not because it was her favorite. At least doesn’t feel that way? Big shrug! Probably didn’t know what to pick! Anyways, think Abel’s papa gave her one too and she ah,, She liked it. Though perhaps she did want to share it with him. But this was before she liked him so shusH.

Originally what I imagined was Adora being pink and her being blue and like. aesthetic! Learned more about Adora now and her wearing blue cuz Nathaniel likes it and she go w e h, but light purple is a close second to the colors she adores. Pink and purple is still aesthetic so it’s f i n  e. shehufftho. 

So she agrees that she’s grown out of her clumsiness, and I know she has! And I’m proud! Stepping on Theodore’s foot was like a fluke because!! He distracted her. But I have very clear visuals of her tumbling into things as a child. I also had the image of her literally bumping into Nathaniel once, idk why. and then she just blink. I wouldn’t be surprised if she fell backwards too though. She just baby. Part of me feels like she might have lil baby tears though owie,,

Anyways she is still quite shy on the inside. Umn, she seems to have outgrown it, yes? That is what she’d been working on the most, as it is one of the traits her parents disliked most about her! But,,, it’s just who she is honest l y. If she’s in a group, she feels little need to speak. She’d let Adora go on, or anyone else to speak in her place. But if you’re one on one with her she can find things now to speak of but,,, She doesn’t like strangers. She trusts little to anyone, especially since her parents are trash and the servants are loyal trash to them. All but one servant, perhaps. Though I’ve had the image of a servant that’s kinda ?? idk b a d at their job, or just very ehhhh clumsy/shy??? Idk but I’d like to replace them with Abel. Who is good at his job and just baby!! She thought he reminded her of herself when she was younger. But she doesn’t hate him for it even though she hated herself for it??? H m n. But!! geh

I told flame once and it was just a throwaway kinda thing so you could all get to know Odette better anyways. But she’s an old ladY. I don’t think she’s ever s e e n a movie. And y’know she may refer to it as a Cinema too, it’s really not that wrong of an answer! 

Her shyness is more one-on-one like when greeting gentleman at a dance or whatever e l s e. She doesn’t like speaking one-on-one. Otherwise I’m surprised Ado r a, we’ve said they’ve done public events for a while now!! She enjoys ballet, she’d say she rivaled her sister in fencing, she enjoys singing and feels like she’s done that publicly too! She has no idea how to paint wh a t, I doubt she’s attempted-- perhaps o n c e. She had cooking on the list at first but that’d be too easy, and she didn’t feel like being roasted :) 

Everyone put snow white and like id k. She disliked Tangled though!! It had a mean mother who trapped her not-daughter in a room. That was one of Odette’s punishments for being unladylike and whatever else as a child! It was dark and she didn’t like it! The mother also kept snapping at her for mumbling, which she did a l o t as a child. 

Also had the image of someone pulling her by her hair and into the dark room so that’s n i c e. Also feels like sometimes she finds herself kinda punishing herself? By sitting alone in a dark room and staring off a bit. I worry. Also I’m sure that’s not the only punishment they had for her just the only one I know of so f a r. Especially if they’re doing all that weekend stuff to ‘the good one’ TM. 

Bonus: Odette if suddenly after all the neglect her parents throw Adora to the wolves cuz she can’t marry Nathaniel, and focus on her . But like also not really because it’s really jarring and sc a r y, thank yo u.

She will have a handkerchief on her at all times, and since she can burn easy at times she likes to carry a parasol! Can’t say she carries a purse as oft e n but it doesn’t really feel all that wron g, but big shrug, I don’t think she goes out that ofte n. Servants take care of buying their needs. Images of her going into town are cute thoug h like let h e r. 

She likes the first two especially, but she has been leaning towards more Asian tastes and continues to into adulthood. She likes th ese (there’s two pictures of it).

[gotatext]

PREFERRED NAME — nora. i think i started going by it in like, 2009?? my full name is eleanor but i hated it n thought it was way too pretentious n i never felt like it fitted me so when i started writing on forums i decided i’d be a nora rather than eleanor and then my school friends called me it and it just kinda stuck, the only person who calls me eleanor is my mum

PRONOUNS — she / her / ethereal being beyond comprehension

AGE — 23 but i tell everyone im 21 because even tho time is literally fake im desperately clinging to that fleeting thing we call youth trying to catch it like smoke in my hands

PINTEREST — i actually have two. this one is my main one where i just cram all my shit n i’ve had it for years and some of its super unorganised. then i also have this one which is one i made for exclusively female characters. it started as mythological figures but now its like, women in literature and the occasional oc as well. variety is the spice of life!

DISCORD — lindsay lohan’s meth#8664

TUMBLR (PERSONAL/MUSE/RPH) — i used to be froseths but now im pvrscphones cos ya gal is a fucking whore for mythology 

OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE — oi oi guvna ere’s me twitta. also here’s my letterboxd n my goodreads if anyone still uses tht

MYER-BRIGGS — enfp / infp border .... the classic profile of a lit student

HP HOUSE — hufflepuff, am fuckin mad. 

ZODIAC — libra which is a joke because i am in no way balanced but i guess i AM indecisive and a peacekeeper so?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY? — i believe it when it says good shits gonna happen in my life and blame it if bad shit happens but i don’t strongly follow it i just find it interesting

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU STARTED RPING ON TUMBLR — maybe like 14?? my first rp blog here is literally so embarassing i wrote as clove from the hunger games n my best friend irl wrote cato :/ it was wild

WHAT YEAR WAS IT? — like 9 years ago?? 2010 maybs

NAME A RANDOM ROLEPLAY THAT STICKS OUT IN YOUR MEMORY — me n my friend ellie made this really cool group the summer before we left for uni which was loosely based on a concept mentioned mayb once in the divergent series, but it gave us loads of freedom to make it our own thing. it was called the fringe n it was like..... this dystopian society where people with different genes were cut off from the rest of society n lived in overrun slum cities where different groups had like, a monopoly over weapons, produce, etc.... my character jack was the leader of this lost-boy-esque tribe called the wolf pack who were hunters n used to run across the rooftops wearing the skins of animals they’d killed and engage in tribal rituals with sacrifices to the gods n shit. sounds lame but everyone there was so invested in their character arcs that it was a shame to see it go. but ! it kind of reached its end point so we blew it up w nukes n they all died. tragic.

WHAT WEIRD ANIMAL WOULD YOU HAVE AS A PET IF IT WAS REALISTIC — a fox?? do ppl keep foxes? idk i’ve always just felt a sense of connection w them like when a fox stares at me im like this shit is life i am living and breathing in this bitch.... visceral

NAME THE FIRST SONG ON YOUR DISCOVER WEEKLY ON SPOTIFY OR THE FIRST SONG THAT COMES ON APPLE MUSIC / ITUNES SHUFFLE — everbody party tonight by cobra man n summer girl by haim..... not my usual stuff but big summer chillin vibes,.....

NAME A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT YOU SURPRISINGLY LIKED — lord of the flies and also the handmaid’s tale. one of assignments was to write a chapter from another character’s perspective n i chose moira

NAME A BOOK YOU HATED THAT MOST PEOPLE LIKED — skellig. fuck off with ur asprin ugly bat man i don’t care. also of mice and men. don’t care about the rabbits or curley’s goddamn wife.

WHAT TV SHOW DID YOU RECENTLY BINGE? — im not a big binger bc i find it jst makes me depressed if i watch tv all day but im nearly finished stranger things season 3 n i recently finished euphoria (big rec but proceed w caution as quite triggering content)

FAVOURITE QUOTE — cool girl speech from gone girl. but also “there’s something dangerous about the boredom of teenage girls” i know its like.... such an overused quote but it really encapsulates this kind of feral girlhood that a few of my characters like bridget n greta have tapped into. i also loved the line “i feel like i could eat the world raw” from song of achilles, that really captures this kind of.... pure n childlike enthusiasm tht i wanna achieve w rory 

LINK TO A VINE THAT EXUDES YOUR ‘ENERGY’ — this is my energy completely am always covered in glitter n staring broodily out of the windows of ubers at 4am like im in the sad bit of an indie film 

DO YOU WRITE OUTSIDE OF RP? WHAT DO YOU WRITE? — uhh.... not as much as i shd.... i want to be a writer so i shd be makin some effort to get my stuff Out Into The World but im just not.... lol. ive done a lot of poetry collections . i wnt to finish a novel @ some point too.

THREE YOUTUBERS YOU STILL TRUST — bold of you to assume i trust any youtubers

A CELEBRITY CRUSH THAT JUST WON’T QUIT — id literally die for saoirse ronan n timothee chalamet :/ chance perdomo also owns my ass. 

EVER MEET A CELEBRITY? SHARE YOUR STORY — i once high-fived dani harmer, the actress who played tracy beaker. today my sister text me tryin to make me guess what celebrity she just saw on holiday in wales and for ages she let me think it was timmothee but it was actually bradley walsh from the chase :/

WHAT’S YOUR PICTURE-PERFECT NIGHT? — i am in a bomb ass crop top and mini skirt, several scrunchies in my hair, glitter all over my face, wearing cowboy boots. we eat dinner in a trendy but affordable pub that doubles up as a cocktail bar n then we drink zombies or sex on the beaches n go to a rave where everyone is on the same wavelength n i share drugs with girls in the toilets and we swap numbers knowing we will never text each other but its ok bc in that moment we feel like we are soulmates and everyone is super drunk n touching everyone else n its all very visceral and we walk through the woods when the rave ends and lie in the grass because we wish to suck out all the marrow of life 

A CONSPIRACY THEORY YOU KINDA BELIEVE IN — princess diana was murdered 

ARE ALIENS REAL? — maybe the real aliens are the friends we made along the way

PLAY ANY PHONE GAMES? WHICH ONES? — love island game im addicted and way too invested in my fictional relationship with bobby, a cartoon

WHAT’S A FILM YOU LOVED WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG AND RECENTLY WATCHED, ONLY TO FIND OUT YOU DON’T ANYMORE — bold of u to assume i remember my childhood. but if we’re talking last 10 years angust, thongs n perfect snogging is so so cringe 

DO YOU COLLECT ANYTHING? — pairs of glasses belonging to other ppl when they break / get new ones even though i can see perfectly well. 

WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BUT YOU’RE TOO LAZY? — mythology...... always a craving and a wish i’d read like ancient texts but my school wasn’t good enough to do greek or latin or any of that shit n even tho i could read english translations i cant be bothered. also criminal psychology

THREE LANGUAGES YOU DON’T SPEAK, BUT WISH YOU COULD — italian, french and latin

MOVIE YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN 5 TIMES — ladybird, about time, angus thongs, shrek 2, what we do in the shadows, the history boys, atonement, coraline, the breakfast club, ferris bueller’s day off

NAME A FICTIONAL CHARACTER FROM TV/FILM/MOVIE/GAME/BOOK THAT YOU FIND YOURSELF PROJECTING ON / YOU RELATE TO — cecilia lisbon. rue in euphoria. alison brie in glow. adam parrish in the raven cycle. richard papen. olivia cooke’s character in thoroughbreds. allen ginsberg in kill your darlings. lily in sex education. holliday grainger’s character in the film animals --- i too am an aspiring writer who never writes and just gets drunk instead .

DO YOU FOLLOW ANY SPORTS? WHO DO YOU ROOT FOR? — no. cba

HOBBIES BESIDES WASTING AWAY HERE? — i go to the movies basically every day bcos i work in a cinema. im also a voracious reader n i occasionally do theatre or costume making

PLUG A TV SHOW / MOVIE / BOOK / VIDEO GAME / ETC… YOU WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD CHECK OUT — where the wild things are (film by spike jonze).  animals. beats. the book fen by daisy johnson and a girl is a half formed thing by eimar mcbride. andy warhol’s biography from a to b and back again

WHOSE BRAIN WOULD YOU LIKE TO PICK, ALIVE OR DEAD? — phoebe waller-bridge on how i get her life. carey mulligan on how she got to be such a good actress n how i can become her. maybs wes anderson. maybs gillian flynn. i tend to listen to podcasts w the ppl i really wanna pick the brains of.

TEAM EDWARD OR JACOB? — edward :/

LAST MOVIE SEEN IN THEATRE — blinded by the light n i lovd it

DO YOU STILL READ? — when i finished uni i kinda got out of the habit but this week i finished two books so ive set myself the challenge of a book a week.

IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? — i finished song of achilles yesterday n i also finished call me by your name yesterday. started circe by madeline miller today, im also partway through milkman by anna burns and the plays of annie barker

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DID YOU HATE FILLING THIS OUT? – 3 i didnt hate it bcos at heart i am self-indulgent and love fashioning some sense of self when i feel lost in a world that is scary and constantly changing 

[thisissirius]

so i saw endgame. spoilers below obviously.

so anybody that knows me, knows that tony stark is hugely important to me. i started reading iron man comics that i stole from my brother at the age of 8, and he has been my favourite ever since. bucky barnes is like right up there, but tony stark always has the edge. 

going in, i was terrified of what might happen thinking rdj is the end, right? it’s obvious he’s gonna leave somehow but that does not in any way prepare you for what’s gonna come. i am at a loss tbh. i haven’t even tried to put my feelings into thoughts because it’s genuinely heartbreaking. i was sobbing in the cinema and had tickets for this morning which i had to cancel because i could not put myself through that again so soon. 

sure, it’s in the last part of the movie but jesus, it hurts.

natasha. what an awful, awful, AWFUL way for her to die. the fact that it was her and not clint will always fuck me off tbh. she deserved better and she deserved to keep her family. IT WASN’T EVEN A SACRIFICE. it was an accident. 

i don’t .... i cannot put into words how devastated i am that the two characters i lost are tony and natasha. it’s heartbreaking.

that said, the movie itself was great but full of gaping issues lmao. 

the time shit just doesn’t work. whatever explanation they give, the past becoming the future, the future being present blah blah doesn’t work when you have characters changing KEY EVENTS and things still progress as normal? S U R E.

don’t get me started on the idiocy that was steve going back in time to spend ~forever with peggy. i’ve seen people argue both sides; it works! somebody would notice peggy married to steve! to me, it’s just a lazy way to get him out of commission for the hand over of the shield.

the worst thing is, it CANT MAKE SENSE and everything work out the same way. it just cant, no matter what shitty reason they give.

returning the stones? dumb as rocks. how you GONNA RETURN THE SOUL STONE? the 70s? no big deal, just walk back into the bunker and pretend i know what im doing. the scepter? the time stone? the REALITY STONE? steve rogers just walking onto asgard and putting the ether back in jane? jshajf IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE and they were just like HERE HAVE OLD STEVE AND FORGET THAT WE DIDNT EXPLAIN SHIT ABOUT HOW HE WAS GONNA RETURN THE STONES BYE

a l so the whole howard stark and tony MESS just upset me. i get it, we want redemption for howard because apparently the russos love him or disney was like “make him great! tony’s a father! let’s have some emotions!” but howard stark is a shitty father at best, abusive at worst and i HATE IT. get out of here with that shit. 

PEGGY WAS AMAZING AND I LOVE LOVE LOVE JARVIS FROM AGENT CARTER BECAUSE Y E S

that said, a MESS EVERYWHERE TBH

ugh. 

PROFESSOR HULK. i’m... in two minds. I LOVED IT and i know the bff did lol, but it’s also super weird to me BUT IM SURE I’LL GET USED TO IT BRUCE WAS GREAT THIS EPISODE and him getting to undo the snap was PERFECT

clint’s journey was pretty much wasted, i hated the whole nebula killing nebula and there being no repercussions from that? thanos was just .... didnt make sense idek, i forgot how much i hated his reasoning in iw and it wasn’t helped in eg, and then i had to deal with him being like “lol im gonna sit here and let you come to me and it’s clear my message is correct and dlkjhdja no”

thor’s journey distressed me in so many ways. it was played for laughs so many times and just generally hurt my soul. it should have been handled better. when the only person doing the right thing with thor is rocket the fucking raccoon? we got problems. 

DONT GET ME WRONG THERE WERE SOME EPIC MOMENTS

steve wielding mjolnir will forever be my favourite thing. with that, STEVE AND TONY AND THOR being the PERFECT PERFECT PERFECT trio in that end fight. YES THANKS. tony stark saving the universe twice over; once with the time loop and the second time with the gauntlet. pepper potts being perfect and awesome. she saved the universe, guys, with her convincing tony to go. never forget. AND IRON HEART YES THANKS. it was VISUALLY STUNNING and the fight scenes were great everyone got a great showing, tbh, and i love everyone carol was... actually well handled. i was concerned for a while how they would handle it, but she WORKS nebula was GREAT.  despite how annoyed i was at the treatment of women majorly in this movie, the scenes of ALL the women helping carol get through the army? AMAZING. i had chills and i’m pretty sure i said “im glad im a lesbian” because let me tell you, they are amazing and i love them

THE STONY/STEVETONY/SUPERHUSBANDS the steve and tony moments were PERFECT. their fight at the beginning, with too-thin tony and a devastated steve felt perfect and real. i don’t think i will ever recover from tony thrusting the arc reactor into steve’s hands, or him calling steve a liar, or steve’s own disbelief and sadness about what’s happened to them. 

i love their meeting when tony decides to help out, and the returning of the shield, and their interactions.

the fact that they get the same mission, and then have their little you trust me, i do moment and going undercover together in the 70s and lksjha.

THE ASS COMMENT are we worthy NOPE

i forever maintain that the ending should have been steve retiring and be like “nah” and instead, sticking around to be uncle steve to morgan, because i honestly believe that without peggy and natasha and tony? there’s not a whole lot left for him. but.

NOW BUCKY BARNES. i just... we didnt get a lot obvs, but what we did get was PERFECT. i loved that he KNEW steve wasn’t coming back, i love that he said goodbye in the only way the two of them COULD say goodbye, and i will forever love that moment between him and sam with bucky’s like whatever, of course you’re captain america, duh

(on that note, i had Feelings about sam consoling bucky at tony’s wedding? why does he need consoling? i have QUESTIONS and i’m probably gonna have to write out my feelings considering my winteriron feelings are growing.)

so in the end, i loved it as a whole, got my ship content, and the fight scenes were phenomenal.

but i lost natasha and my found family.

i lost tony stark, which is a much harder pill to swallow.

[soupberries]

Burn The Stage The Movie: My Experience and Thoughts

I know this is an art blog but I really felt like sharing my thoughts!

This post will consist of:

The general cinematic experience

My thoughts on the movie itself! (I will put this bit under the “Keep reading” tab. I hate spoilers as much as the next guy!)

So - let’s begin!

(Disclaimer: Opinionated)

PART 1: THE GENERAL CINEMATIC EXPERIENCE

The local cinema where I live is located at the top floor of a shopping mall with only one other shop nearby it, which is a restaurant. Take this into consideration.

I arrived at the mall with my friends at around 8 o’ clock. The movie was at 9.15pm but I wanted to get there early because I knew there was a small giveaway for a mock ticket designed by BTSMalaysia on Twitter, and I was afraid if I was late I wouldn’t be able to get it. The cinema lobby was fairly empty except for a small group of people in the corner who were quite obviously ARMYs. One of them had an ARMY bomb and was walking around like he had a duty to do, which he did - it was to hand out the mock tickets. I knew he was the guy I was supposed to approach but I was suddenly frozen with fear and I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I don’t know what came over me. All these doubts flooded into my head, I was scared I was gonna make a fool of myself. Luckily my friend went to approach him for me and we got our mock tickets T_T

After that we went off to go get some food since we still had like an hour till the movie started. I met up with another friend of mine around 8.30pm and she told us that they were having a flash mob up at the cinema lobby and they were playing BTS songs. So we went to go check it out. Surely enough, there was a crowd of people surrounding only two people in the middle who were dancing to Dope (which was being played in the lobby). The cinema was the one playing the music, by the way. Not the crowd. So I guess it means they were encouraging it. Nobody seemed very disturbed by it, and I really hope nobody was. It was cute in a way? Seeing everyone so excited. If the cinema had played more recent and easier songs I think more people would’ve joined in, not just the two. The playlist consisted of Dope, DNA, Baepsae, Anpanman, I NEED U... those kinds of songs. I’ll admit I did kinda cringe though.

It was interesting to see the local ARMYs because sometimes I feel so isolated? But there’s actually a lot more than I would’ve thought. A lot of them seemed to be university and college students, and there were a few parents there too.

I’m so so very glad I got seats right at the back of the cinema. I had a friend who was sitting in the middle rows and she said she was disturbed by the people behind her who were talking during the emotional moments. I hope my friend and I didn’t disturb the people in front of us though... but all we did was make comments once in a while about how cute BTS were haha. 

While the ads were running some people were irritated by how many ads there were which is understandable but it was still annoying. Whenever one ad finished, there would be people going, “Please, please, pleeeease,” but when the next ad played they all groaned. Like just... don’t? When the BTS ads started playing a lot of people screamed which doesn’t make much sense to ME but people are excited, okay, I get it. When the movie finally started some people tried to start the fanchant but got shushed and not to be mean but it was kinda funny. This is a MOVIE, not a concert. We should treat it as such. Anyway it gave me some faith in local ARMYs. They were well behaved and I was impressed. Prior to the movie I was SO afraid of my experience being ruined by “no jams” and “Koreaboos”. But it wasn’t! Surprisingly I didn’t hear a single word of Korean from anyone there. Either that or I’m not observant, haha. I’m glad I didn’t hear it, nonetheless. Nobody had their ARMY bombs with them - or if they did, it wasn’t turned on in the cinema hall. There was no screaming (except for the first few shots of the members when the movie started - which I expected). Everyone reacted and laughed along and I think we all enjoyed the movie. I was happy. 

PART 2: THOUGHTS ON THE MOVIE

From here on I will be talking about the movie, which means major spoilers! Only click “Keep reading” if you’ve already watched the movie or want to be spoiled!

It was very, very different to the YouTube Red series. I thought I was gonna be basically the same thing, which is why I initially didn’t want to go. But after seeing the trailer and how much new content there was, I decided I would. 

Anyway. I like how this movie had a narrative? The whole “Desert, Together, Sea” thing. I just love how they incorporated their hidden track into their movie. I was surprised the movie didn’t touch so much on their struggles? Well it did, but from a different angle. It just wasn’t as explicit as the YouTube Red series (ie. the fainting, the fights, the insecurities). I feel like the movie highlighted more on their togetherness, their family-like bond. Not just with each other but with their staff and even Bang PD. And on BTS’ relationship with ARMY. 

The movie shows the side of them we will probably never ever get to see - them being themselves. When they were having their little retreat thing and messing about and having fun in the pool, I couldn’t help but think, “They look like ordinary boys. Having fun with each other, eating, drinking, chatting.” It must be hard to find that balance, you know? Between your idol life and your ordinary life. 

It was fun to see the shots of them just hanging, like Jinminkook eating together and joking together and being, well, themselves. 

They touched on the pressure they feel to deliver the best performance they can to their fans - which must be an awful lot of pressure, I can imagine. Jimin was so visibly upset at his mistake even after all his brothers were comforting him, telling him he was cool... it was, well, not sad. I don’t know the right emotion to explain it. It was just interesting, I guess? Because, like I said before, we will never get to see this side of them. All we see are the glittery outfits, dazzling smiles, on point performances, an occasional cosy V-live. It can be hard to remember that they, too, are humans. 

I wish I could understand Korean so I could’ve gotten Jin’s jokes! The part with him and their personal trainer (?) was so cute. It really does show the bond they have with their staff. And when they were all having dinner together, when Namjoon gave a toast, saying “We couldn’t have done it without (the staff),” (or something like that) and one of them replied, “Well said!” and everyone laughed. Even after they toasted I noticed Jimin chatting to one of the staffs at the table in a friendly way. These boys, they’re so humble. 

When they had the meeting with Bang PD - man, that totally put him in a new light. I always see people online calling him not-so-nice things and accusing him of mistreating members, which may or may not be true. But you can’t deny that he cares for BTS. (Or at least seems to, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.) They have said he’s like their father, and the movie showed that. He told them that it was important for them to be happy, and that he was scared that if they continued the way they were that they would be miserable. I just thought that was nice.

The way Yoongi was so excited about all the music equipment in the shop was so cute! They seemed so happy to have a day to themselves to just go out and shop. In fact, they seemed very happy about vacationing in general. When Jin announced that they got a week’s vacation after their Taipei concert he looked very excited. I hope they get more holidays. 

I feel like the thing that makes them so humble is the fact that they are AWARE of the fact that this isn’t going to last forever. I feel like that’s what keeps them going, too. How Yoongi said, “There will come a day when we can’t do this even if we wanted to.” Hits hard, man. 

I loved how they kept joking about them winning the BBMA and how they kept mentioning it? Not in a prideful way, like... I don’t know? It was just fun. How Hoseok said jokingly to the cameraman, “Hey, you’re working for a BBMA winner!” They were obviously very excited about winning it. 

WHEN YEONTAN POPPED UP OH MY GOSH it was so so cute! Everyone in the cinema uwued together haha.

Oooh and when Hoseok hit that high note in Stigma? Wowwww!

Another part which I learned something new was when Taehyung and Hoseok were in a car and Taehyung played 4 o' Clock for him... and he said he wrote it to the character he played in Hwarang - Hansung! That's so cute of him. But turns out it wasn't written to Jimin like we originally thought? Though that was just speculation by Namjoon, right? Anyhow. Taehyung is precious.

There was one line of the narration which stuck out to me, I don’t know why? It went something like, “When you present yourself with confidence, not conceit, you will captivate the hearts of thousands.” Which is very true! In the case of BTS, I feel like one of their major appeals is how humble they are. They present themselves in a way that is confident, but not arrogant.

The relationship BTS and ARMY have is a very interesting one. Codependent. BTS helped ARMY and ARMY helped BTS. We never fail to show our gratefulness for each other. They highlighted this in the movie too.

I didn’t get very emotional during the movie, though. I didn’t cry (I don’t know if I was supposed to - I felt like I was). Some things that made my heart hurt were the orchestra versions of Sea and Spring Day! Please release those tracks! I need them!

Also, a side note... who was the narrator? I have a feeling it wasn't a BTS member so it felt kinda weird. But I suppose BTS are quite busy and may not have had time to narrate a two-hour movie. I don't know.

All in all, it was a sweet movie. BTS’ teamwork is astounding and I truly believe it was fate that brought them together. 

As a business student, I feel like this movie was a very smart idea. It brings benefits for all - the cinema company, BigHit, BTS and ARMY. Cinemas get money, BH and BTS get money as well as gaining consumer (ARMY) trust and loyalty and potentially even more clients (fans) from ARMY who brought their non-ARMY friends. ARMY get new content and a whole new understanding of their faves. Win-win, yes? Don’t mind me. That’s just Business Lily speaking. 

But yeah, that’s all I can remember... It was enjoyable, but perhaps I would’ve enjoyed it more if I wasn’t sick with a flu haha.

That’s all I have for now! Thank you for reading

[topeve]

enjoy :) 4, 7 (what is your opinion on baby by justin bieber covered by ana ivonne being the villaneve anthem), 13, 15, 31, 37, 53, 64, 66, 75, 82, 83, 93, 94, 96, 105, 114, 118, 134, 145, 151, 163, 164

I’VE NEVER ANSWERED ASKS ON MY LAPTOP BEFORE BUT THIS PHYSICALLY MADE ME GET UP AND LOG ON BC I CANNOT DO IT ON MOBILE

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?

hmmm honestly it was probably super mario world 2 on my gameboy advanced. it’s been like………….literal years but i’m in the LAST world of levels so m gonna beat it SOMEDAY

7: What’s your opinion on baby by Justin Bieber covered by Ana Ivonne being the villaneve anthem?

i SAW ur post about it and my immediate reaction was, admittedly, mixed emotions…………mostly bc like……….i wouldn’t associate Justin Bieber of all people w one of my favorite ships. HOWEVER upon listening to it?????? it’s growing on me! i like how sultry the cover is & i’m really thinking about adding it to my villaneve playlist! so thank you for that!!!!

13: Are you a cat or dog person?

i would Die for both of them—i like them for different reasons???? sometimes u jus really want a more interactive presence (dogs), but then cats are so independent……. the overall verdict is prob cats tho…..cats purring or doing the brrmph? poetic cinema

15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?

jenna marbles jenna marbles JENNA MARBLES

i dont watch anyone else because i dont really have time but if i want to see some QUALITY content i watch jenna marbles……..i beg of you……watch the green screen video…..you’ll know what i mean when you see it

31: Do you get scared easily?

uhhhh idk it depends on the circumstances. i can get real nervous over stupid things like a party but if i almost get t-boned by another vehicle i’m perfectly fine (because i’m dead inside)! 

37: What is your eye color?

dabs on that beat. theyre a deep brown. i like em

53: How are you feeling right now?

i’m ok! i’ve been really stressed lately but right now i’m super chill and sleepy

64: Favorite animal(s):

penguins (my best friend is actually a penguin i met in a german aquarium type thing), tigers, frogs

66: Favorite emoticon:

THE ONE I USE THE MOST OFTEN IS 😅

75: Can you do a front flip?

that, my friend, is a resounding no!!!!!  on a trampoline i can but not normally. also, i am scared,

82: Something you really enjoy doing:

i love my guitar……..i went on a weird hiatus with guitar playing because i just didnt have the time but someone left a guitar in the classroom the other day and it was like rediscovering an old flame 

83: Favorite person to talk to:

oh god idk there’s too many people i like talking to???? though a friend sent me a rly sweet message out of the blue the other day and it was super refreshing 

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?

if it’s hot coffee usually i max out at 2 but iced coffee????? no limit, no limit at ALL i dont CARE if i get the jitters it be like that sometimes!

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?

THERE ARE SOME THINGS I DONT WANT/NEED TO KNOW so i’d much rather fly my ass around in a circle than read minds idk like….hearing people’s uncensored opinion of u or others….Dont Like That

96: Winter or summer?

summer!!!!!!!! the winter is SO long here it’s like 6 months so by the time we dont have snow on the ground i’m DYING for the sunshine

105: Do you drink milk?

JFGHEIURHGIRUGH i answered this one already but YES i’ll drink it straight out of the carton i have no sense of self preservation

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?

sunny! kind of for the same reasoning as the winter/summer question. it gets really tiring when the weather is so gross all the time so my body is like permanently soaking up sunshine whenever it gets the chance. the only thing i hate are the flies bc theyre nasty

118: Do you have freckles?

my brother does but i dont?????? if im in the sun a lot i tend to get some speckles but my face is normally clear of anything

134: Do you like roller coasters?

YES I LOVE THEM i DIE for rollercoasters i went on this SUPER cool one where it was literally going upside down and backwards the ENTIRE time i’ll NEVER forget it

145: How many languages do you speak fluently?

i’m bilingual, so two! i speak english & french fluently or super close to it—french is sort of in a complicated spot bc i dont really get to use it a lot which results in losing some

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?

probably ancient egypt they were real cool and funky and its amazing how developed they were at the time in comparison to other civilizations

163: Last time you cried and why:

not 2 be emo but yesterday just bc of general stress and stuff yknow?? sometimes you just really need to cry and get it out of your system to feel better 

164: Do you have long or short hair?

SUPER long—doesnt look like it at first because my hair’s naturally curly but when it’s wet or straight it’s nearly butt length,,,,,,, i dont really like it since it gets in the way all the time so it’s almost ALWAYS put up or tied back and out of my face. hoping to chop it off sometime this summer and do smth different!

holy HECK that was an adventure. thank you sm for the ask u are the REAL mvp!!!!!!!

[elsaclack]

that i need you because it’s so hard to be who i am

i tried to write something else but it turned into this so i guess i’m a week late lmao but!! here u go

pt. 1 of who knows how many (probably 2 but we’ll see)

title is a line from a song called who i am by nathan perry

Amy empties out her desk about an hour after Vin leaves.

It’s hard, in that moment, to put a name to the sinking feeling in the pit of his gut. Because it’s a happy occasion, it’s a joyful step forward for his bride-to-be, and they spend the half-hour or so that it takes to box everything up giggling and laughing at each momento they find in her drawers. She has a surprisingly large number of non-functional knick-knacks hidden away between her file folders and homemade disinfectant spray, so between neatly packing her stationary and rubber-banding up all of her replacement ink fills for the nice fountain pen her brother got for her on her last birthday, they spend a considerable amount of time trekking down memory lane.

It’s hard not to notice the fact that she only seemed to start collecting things about a year before Captain Holt took over as their commanding officer. She merely blushes when he points this out.

But then it’s 7:30 and the last of her belongings are finally unloaded and carefully placed in and on her new desk and she’s straightening up the last picture of the two of them from the night they got engaged right beside her brand new computer monitor while she talks about what they should order for dinner (she’s been dealing with a hankering for good Chinese food ever since Vin mentioned the authentic Chinese cuisine he ate the last time he was in Tianjin and Jake is definitely not still vaguely jealous of the general lifestyle Vin leads) and Jake’s stomach is hollow, hollow, hollow.

That’s what makes the rumbling so loud, he thinks.

Amy arches an amused brow when his stomach practically wails at the mention of fried rice. “So we’ll double up on the egg rolls, then?”

He grins as he nods, but even he can feel that it’s not quite touching his eyes. “Sounds perfect,” he says honestly.

Her smile softens, edges tinged with concern, but she seems to decide against asking. “Let’s order from the car so the delivery time seems shorter,” she says as she slings her purse over her shoulder.

“I’ve totally rubbed off on you,” he says mock-smugly, and she grins cheekily in return as she rounds her new desk and reaches to take his arm. “Lemme just run back upstairs and grab my bag from my desk.”

She pauses, hand outstretched toward him. “Oh, d’you want me to go with you?”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll just meet you at the car?”

Slowly, her hand falls back to her side. She’s got that look on her face again - pensive and curious, like he’s a particularly difficult case she’s on the verge of cracking but she can’t quite find that final missing piece. “Okay,” she says, pacing backwards toward the elevator, seamlessly merging into oncoming beat cop traffic. “Two minutes?”

“Ten-four,” he salutes, and she salutes back, and he waits until the elevator doors have slid shut before releasing a long, slow breath.

This new desk is set up pretty much exactly the way her old desk upstairs is set up, with the exception of the new filing cabinet off to the left hand side and the fact that this new monitor is so slim it takes up about half of the depth that her old one did. It leaves more room for the little knick-knacks she’d hidden away upstairs - like the plastic police-woman figurine, who’s down on one knee with her gun drawn, a little chip of paint missing on the left lens of her dark sunglasses. She’s part of the set Jake has sitting on his own desk - positioned right, and she fits right up against the open door of the squad car, in front of the police-man figurine, whose feet are spread shoulder-width apart so that he can stand over the woman’s bent leg and fire his little plastic gun over her head. He’d had it for ages before he met Amy, and had kept the entire set for a few years after she came to the Nine-Nine. He’d only given her the woman from the set toward the end of a week-long marathon murder case, and that was only because he was so deliriously tired he couldn’t even think straight.

At least, that’s what he’d told himself at the time.

He gingerly plucks the figurine up off of Amy’s desktop and examines it closely. It’s almost exactly the same as he remembers it - though her plastic hair is a bit more orange than red. He runs the pad of his thumb over the smooth surface of the little blue hat - a move he used to pull often when he was anxious and fidgety upstairs - and then carefully replaces it exactly where he found it.

The night crew is still in briefing when Jake makes it upstairs, so his bag is still sitting exactly where he left it - which is to say in the exact center of his desk, fallen to the side, contents just beginning to spill everywhere - but, still, he falters and stops in his tracks.

Amy’s desk is empty.

It’s suddenly very difficult to breathe.

Which is pretty stupid, all things considered. The sight of his partner’s desk empty and barren should be far less striking than it is, especially since he’s seen his own desk just as empty and barren twice now, for far more terrifying reasons than a promotion. He should be happy, then. He should be happy.

But her desk is empty and someone else is going to sit there eventually and they won’t know him. They won’t immediately know how to play finish the lyrics with him when it’s slow and he’s bored, they won’t know that only he is allowed to sing along to the Backstreet Boys when their songs come up on shuffle, they won’t be able to tell what mood he’s in by what flavor of Pringles he’s eating or even that Die Hard is the best movie in the history of cinema. They won’t try to huck jelly beans at his head when he’s not paying attention or do wild dances in the middle of the bullpen floor when they solve a grueling case at 3 AM or walk around in those big clunky sensible heels or know what he means when he says he feels fizzy and Amy’s desk is empty.

He clenches his shaking hands into fists down at his sides.

He’s not sure how long he just stands there staring at it, but eventually the briefing room doors swing open and the bullpen is full of the din of beat cops chatting and over the noise, he hears a familiar voice calling his name. Amy’s skirting around the beat cops, fighting against the flow of traffic to get to where he’s rooted to the spot. As he watches a few of the beat cops seem to recognize her; a few of them point, a few wave, one even breaks away from the crowd to shake her hand. She greets them all with a polite - and completely thrilled - smile on her face that only fades when she’s standing in front of him and his body mostly blocks her from view. “Is everything okay? What’s going on?”

There’s a little crease in her brow, more prominent on the left brow than on the right, and when Jake blinks a thousand images flash behind his eyelids of this expression, framed by a thousand different hairstyles and a thousand different circumstances. He feels her hand on his arm and nearly shivers at her touch - surely whoever sits at her desk won’t ever draw this kind of reaction out of him. No one will ever be able to read him as easily and fluently as Amy does, and just how the hell is he supposed to rely on someone else out in the field when the best partner he’s ever had now sits an entire world away from him?

“Your desk,” is all he manages to get out before the words seem to grind to a halt right there in his throat. A brief spark of confusion ignites in her eyes before understanding snuffs it out; she glances over her shoulder at that long stretch of flawless, sparkling faux-wood-grain surface in question, and her grip around his arm grows tighter.

“I’m just gonna be downstairs,” she says softly as she turns back to face him. “Plus, we live together. We’ll still see each other every day -”

“I don’t care about - I mean, I mean I do care about that, but that’s not what’s - I’m just -” he stops and tilts his head back, releasing a loud breath, focusing on the way her thumb rubs against his bicep through his flannel in a slow and soothing motion and not on the fact that his ribs feel like they’re clattering together in an earthquake. “You’re the best partner I’ve ever had,” he finally manages to croak. Her thumb goes still. “You’re my best friend and my fiancée, and I really am so happy and so proud of you, but...but your desk is empty and I don’t know who’s gonna sit there next and that kinda freaks me out.”

His confession hangs between them for all of three seconds before her hands are on his back and her head is against his chest and the earthquake dies down at once. He pulls her in closer, forgetting her rules about workplace-appropriate behavior and no-PDA the moment the scent of her achingly familiar strawberry shampoo drowns out the stale coffee and gunpowder that seems to cling to the very air here. He buries his nose in her hair and breathes deep, and the ache of her empty desk isn’t quite so stinging anymore. He still closes his eyes to block out the sight of it when he turns his head to kiss her temple, though.

“Jake,” she says softly when she pulls away a few moments later. “You know that you and I got insanely lucky, right? I mean, most partners don’t end up falling in love or getting married. Just because you fell in love with your last partner doesn’t mean you’re destined to hate your next one. And, who knows? Maybe Holt will move Rosa or Charles into that desk. Or maybe you can steal it and finally have that mega-desk you always used to talk about.”

He snorts, and runs his hands down her arms until her hands catch in his. “Yeah, maybe. But a mega-desk won’t make me a better detective, and neither will Charles or Rosa. I got better because of you. I guess I’m just...sad to be losing that.”

Her eyes flick down to his lips as she smiles, and then her hands are framing his face and she’s up on the balls of her feet to kiss him. The taste of her spearmint toothpaste has mostly faded from her post-lunch brush, leaving room for that taste he’s yet to put an actual name to - comfort, joy, home, her - and every cell in his body seems to go peacefully still at the gentle pressure of her lips against his.

Slowly, they break apart, and Jake’s suddenly aware of the fact that his hands are on her hips, skimming lightly along her back, beneath her blazer, just above the waistband of her slacks. “You’re not losing anything, Jake,” she murmurs, curling her fingers against his cheek at such an angle that the edges of her engagement ring barely catch against the scant amount of stubble he’s grown over the course of the day.

He tilts his head up to press a slow kiss to her forehead, lingering until his heart doesn’t feel quite so close to the edge of bursting.

“C’mon,” she says as she turns back toward his desk. “I’m starving and I already ordered the food, and I’m really not in the mood to chase some delivery guy down if we’re not home when he gets there.”

He chuckles as he quickly shovels his belongings back into his bag and slings it over his shoulder. She’s already started toward the elevator but her hand is outstretched toward him; this time, he only spares a single glance backwards at her old desk before hurrying toward her and taking her hand.

It’s just a desk, after all.