#— my dreams are my wings. { ooc. }
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when did this start happening? — Kijitykha, trauma swap AU
— FROM HERE ;; ( @diademreigned )
A haze had settled over him. A fog as the world spun around him and the edges of his vision darkened. Despite the chill in the air, X'kijin had found himself tugging off the jacket as the world around him seemed to spike in temperature.
It was fortune that had led him to be with a newlyfound friend. It was blind luck that when he had stumbled back, a hand had braced him at his back, despite their height difference. Had it not been there, had D'tykha's reflexes not been as good, well...
That was neither here nor there and hardly mattered, in the wider picture, given it was no longer a concern. The hand on his back steadied him, then a body followed that he could rest himself against until he found his bearings again.
When did this start happening?
Such a simple question, yet X'kijin had no simple answer. A long time, he ought to say, though that was more of a non-answer, so he settled for something... Slightly more specific.
"Since I was a kid," he said, the words slow as a cool hand pressed to his forehead. He wasn't entirely sure when D'tykha had moved them so that X'kijin lay on the ground, rested against him.
Green eyes glanced upwards at him, though his vision still swam and he'd surely never guess what he was looking at if it weren't for the voice that gave away who he rested against. Their previous conversation had faded to the back of his mind.
"Sorry, I..."
A hand came to rest in his own, a surprise, but not an unwelcome one in the moment.
"Give me a minute..."
#✧ ▌ in character : x'kijin lyzej.#diademreigned#❝ diademreigned — d'tykha lyrre.#❛ x'kijin lyzej. - dream in the light; dance in the dark. you fill the spaces inside of my heart. ⟨ d'tykha lyrre / diademreigned. ⟩#// ooc. we are not allowed to talk only about an au in vc anymore; i can't remember what we discussed for this we are WINGING it HJFDLKJH
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tag drop!!
#(there are many theories but only mine is correct; asks)#(an apple that fell from the tree; submissions)#(artistry crafted by the goddess; art)#(the wandering soul knows no rest; headcanons)#(there are no dreams,no honor remains; musings)#(she guides us to bliss,her gift everlasting; minerva)#(my soul‚ corrupted by vengeance hath endured torment; genesis)#(if it were between you and i,would you be the hero?; sephiroth)#(he flies with wings of an angel; angeal)#(the opera of the goddess; music)#(a single fish within the livestream; ooc)
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weary lesbian and her child that likes to walk into oncoming traffic for fun and pet the cars like horsies
tagged by; @bravevolunteer ♡♡ tagging; you, steal this and say i tagged you!
#i accidentally made her the same age as me and yea her birthday is in march and mine is in april#she is still my daughter#𖥸 ₊ * “ visage ” … something about angel wings‚ much about a broken heart.#𖥸 ₊ * “ ooc ” … just had a dream <3 i love psychology.
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reminder to myself to write up an early popstar era verse post + headcanons ok goodnight
#it's not really like a verse that i'm necessarily like#SUPER open to writing with people in outside of R bc we#started dreaming up this specific plot but like#if you see it and find interest in it i am open to plotting but#it's not gonna be one of my like#'i'm gonna wing it' things you know KBSDCS#it's more so that i'm like#putting perspective to ahri's early days in modern and in the industry#and if you wanna write up a backstory where ahri and your muse are friends during those days that's actually very fine#and if we do like how they first became friends ...#does that make sense tho KSJDCDS like YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN#like for example u know like my canon verse / kda / spirit blossom / etc are like#very open i'll write it any time no problem no in depth plotting required#U KNOW KJSBDC#anyways ok im gonna sleep now#i just had ideas very specific to kaynhri is all like#ahri is intrinsically tied to R's kayn#ooc.#tbd.
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tag drop me hearties.
#devilry. ⟊⚔⟊ || : and really bad eggs.#answered. ⟊⚔⟊ || : ye come seekin’ adventure and salty old pirates,eh?#meme. ⟊⚔⟊ || : prepare to make sail!#meme response. ⟊⚔⟊ || : it be too late to alter course,mateys.#ooc. ⟊⚔⟊ || : no need to expose your superstructure!#musings. ⟊⚔⟊ || : one cannot be moderately dead,or moderately loved,or moderately free.#elizabeth swann. ⟊⚔⟊ || : let me wrap my teeth around the world.#jack sparrow. ⟊⚔⟊ || : a little tune he whistles and a little song he sings,mounting,still triumphant on his torn and broken wings.#cutler beckett. ⟊⚔⟊ || : killing innocent pirates with a gusto.#aesthetic. ⟊⚔⟊ || : we betray the ones we love for those we love a little more.#william turner. ⟊⚔⟊ || : only cruel immortality consumes: I wither slowly in thine arms,here at the quiet limit of the world.#hector barbossa. ⟊⚔⟊ || : and they all dead did lie: and a thousand thousand slimy things lived on,and so did I.#davy jones. ⟊⚔⟊ || : Charon,the proud and sombre beggar stood,with one strong vengeful hand on either oar.#james norrington. ⟊⚔⟊ || : but man,proud man,drest in a little brief authority,most ignorant of what he’s most assur’d.#mr. cotton. ⟊⚔⟊ || : rule 42 of the Code: no one shall speak to the Man at the Helm,and the Man at the Helm shall speak to no one.#v: pre cotbp. ⟊⚔⟊ || : in memory of golden summer hours,and whispers of a summer sea.#v: cotbp. ⟊⚔⟊ || : I am sick of prettiness,I am sick of privacy. I ride rough waters and shall sink with no one to save me.#v: dmc. ⟊⚔⟊ || : man's apparel she put on,and she follow'd her true lover,for to find him she is gone.#v: awe. ⟊⚔⟊ || : we set out with a map and a flag,with a gun and a rag,with ambitions and dreams.#v: post awe. ⟊⚔⟊ || : when our truth is burned from history,by those who figure justice in fond memory,witness me.#norribeth. ⟊⚔⟊ || : we were two ships in the night,hellbent on trying to survive,and capsized.#willabeth. ⟊⚔⟊ || : all the fear and the fire of the end of the world happens each time a boy falls in love with a girl.#sparrabeth. ⟊⚔⟊ || : we were not made to let ourselves grow rotten on the vine,I know heaven can’t be better than your body next to mine.
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tags; general
*❈ ‣ nothing there sings not even my lark. larks never will‚ you know‚ when they’re captive. — ( study. )
*❈ ‣ and i could use a canary — ( wishlist. )
*❈ ‣ sometimes i feel like i cry without a noise‚ sometimes i feel like somebody chose my choice — ( headcanon. )
*❈ ‣ i’m a silly little ninnynoodle — ( ooc. )
*❈ ‣ how can you jubilate sitting in cages‚ never taking wing? — ( aesthetic. )
*❈ ‣ outside the sky waits‚ beckoning‚ beckoning‚ just beyond the bars — ( queue. )
*❈ ‣ have you decided it’s safer in cages‚ singing when you’re told? — ( interaction. )
*❈ ‣ are you discussing or fussing or simply dreaming?— ( starter call. )
*❈ ‣ a runaway from everywhere she'd ever been — ( psa. )
*❈ ‣ how she had wrung out her girlhood like a death — ( edit. )
*❈ ‣ making herself even prettier than usual‚ if possible — ( self promotion. )
*❈ ‣ i feared you’d never come‚ that you’d been called away — ( promotion. )
*❈ ‣ teach me how to sing. if i cannot fly‚ let me sing — ( meme. )
*❈ ‣ and are you beautiful and pale with yellow hair like her? — ( visage. )
*❈ ‣ whence comes this melody constantly flowing? — ( meta. )
#*❈ ‣ nothing there sings not even my lark. larks never will‚ you know‚ when they’re captive. — ( study. )#*❈ ‣ and i could use a canary — ( wishlist. )#*❈ ‣ sometimes i feel like i cry without a noise‚ sometimes i feel like somebody chose my choice — ( headcanon. )#*❈ ‣ i’m a silly little ninnynoodle — ( ooc. )#*❈ ‣ how can you jubilate sitting in cages‚ never taking wing? — ( aesthetic. )#*❈ ‣ outside the sky waits‚ beckoning‚ beckoning‚ just beyond the bars — ( queue. )#*❈ ‣ have you decided it’s safer in cages‚ singing when you’re told? — ( interaction. )#*❈ ‣ are you discussing or fussing or simply dreaming?— ( starter call. )#*❈ ‣ a runaway from everywhere she'd ever been — ( psa. )#*❈ ‣ making herself even prettier than usual‚ if possible — ( self promotion. )#*❈ ‣ i feared you’d never come‚ that you’d been called away — ( promotion. )#*❈ ‣ teach me how to sing. if i cannot fly‚ let me sing — ( meme. )#*❈ ‣ and are you beautiful and pale with yellow hair like her? — ( visage. )#*❈ ‣ whence comes this melody constantly flowing? — ( meta. )#*❈ ‣ how she had wrung out her girlhood like a death — ( edit. )
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BELLUM. Elsa uncovering her repressed memories of baby Keigo and SCREAMING to her sister
Anna like "wow and I thought it was only MY memories that got messed with"
followed by her giggling as Elsa lets out a frustrated string of Norwegian curses HOW COULD HER MIND DO THIS TO HER
#is that a fucking gremlin ?? ( OOC. )#(( LITERALLY she thinks she made ''that kid with the wings who I helped'' up as an imaginary friend or smth#but then she has a dream and finally connects ''that kid'' with ''current friend'' aND REALIZES SHE DIDN'T JUST MAKE HIM UP#and then she has to go hug him and be like ''herreguds I am SO SORRY I FORGOT YOU-'' while crying bc like#that wasn't some Big Moment in her life or anything bc she only met him that ONE time#but at the same time it's a core memory of ''I can use my powers to help people'' bc I'm sure she used her Quirk to get him home safely#and she just feels so strongly about REMEMBERING THAT SHE KNEW HIM even if just for a short while#and this also brings up the question of if Hawks remembers her THEN HOW LONG HAS HE KNOWN AND WAS WAITING FOR HER TO REMEMBER !!!!#I am. emotionally compromised currently thank u for understanding I'm- ))
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okay lets actually work on some tags . . .
#{ they will . . . simple. i do not want them to break. sobs. }#♫ 【✧♡✧】 featherless ; (ooc)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 interview answers ; (answered asks)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 interview questions ; (ask memes)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 gather one gather all ; (dash games)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 do you truly wish to see what's hidden deep underneath? ; (headcanons)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 let my heart bravely spread the wings ; (visage)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 hands up! embrace who you wanna be! ; (musings & aesthetics)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 she chased her dreams beneath the starry night ; (self promo)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 you're the key to where my trust begins ; (promos)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 be free little bird ; you're caged no longer (main verse)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 your story shall be retold on the throne of heroes for years to come ; (fate verse)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 teyvats up and coming songstress ; (genshin impact verse)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 to be the best there ever was ; (pokemon verse)#♫ 【✧♡✧】 just a little songbard ; (final fantasy verse)#{ it's been . . . a while. i'm rusty with making these i fear. }
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new tag dump because i need to update them all. this includes ship tags <3
#[ ooc ] — for merely dreaming we were snow.#[ ic ] — i'm counting on you to be my wings and my eyes.#[ prompts ] — requested melodies from the audience.#[ musings ] — it feels like flying‚ but maybe we're dying.#[ inbox ] — believe me darling‚ the stars were made for falling.#[ lore ] — voler face à la lune‚ vois comme nous évoluons.#[ mirror ] — we will be atoning at last‚ eternal through the past‚ above a blinding star.#[ bronya rand ] — my femme fatale‚ make this dance complete. (faithscore)#[ don quixote ] — let us fulfill our dreams together‚ our dance of beauty and stars. (dreamtchamber)#[ sunday ] — so carry me from these walls‚ brother of mine‚ show me the world outside. (pinokoni)#[ serval landau ] — i feel like i'm struck by your lightning. (raytm)
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tags? tags!
#out of cards ( ooc )#beneath the dazzle ( personal information )#gambler's conceit ( memes )#put on display ( face | pictures )#a scratch on the surface ( musings )#dealt a new hand ( starters )#fireworks burn down quickly; shine bright little spark ( Sparkle )#as rigid in your morals as your thoughts and element ( Gepard Landau )#two jokers in the deck; promises of a fun game ( Sampo Koski )#now; YOU ; seem unfamiliar ( original characters )#a catching tune; the sounds of hope ( Serval )#the man; the myth; the legend; a fear in form and function ( Jing Yuan )#my memories are yours to have; just give me an extra edge ( Black Swan )#Optimism; really; that softness is going to cost you ( Topaz )#trailblazer's unofficial dad ( Welt )#a dragon in human clothing; huh ; what a good pun ( Dan Heng - and IL-)#Such a good boy; a perfect dog for the family; aren't you? ( Gallagher)#a ticket to a fake heaven; smothered in indulgent dreams ( Sunday )#just a songbird with clipped wings; in a gilded cage ( Robin )#more than meets the eye aren't you? ( Acheron )#encased in amber light ( verse i; everything star rail )#Out of the trash emerges... fluffiness? ( Meowski )#never stop. 9 out of 10 gamblers quit right before they win big ( crack | joke | non-serious RP )#teaching a griffon to take flight again ( emergency plan )#a Landau never backs down from their word ( Ocelot Landau [emergency verse exclusive] )#the good reliable doctor ( Veritas Ratio )
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also i got rid of the post i used as tag dump...
so, uh, tag dump.
#out of cards ( ooc )#beneath the dazzle ( personal information )#gambler's conceit ( memes )#put on display ( face | pictures )#a scratch on the surface ( musings )#dealt a new hand ( starters )#fireworks burn down quickly; shine bright little spark ( Sparkle )#as rigid in your morals as your thoughts and element ( Gepard )#two jokers on the table; prelude to a fun game ( Sampo Koski )#now; YOU ; seem unfamiliar ( original characters )#a catching tune; the sounds of hope ( Serval )#the man; the myth; the legend; a fear in form and function ( Jing Yuan )#my memories are yours to have; just give me an extra edge ( Black Swan )#Optimism; really; no surprise you got demoted ( Topaz )#trailblazer's unofficial dad ( Welt )#a dragon in human clothing; huh ; what a good pun ( Dan Heng - and IL-)#Such a good boy; a perfect dog for the family; aren't you? ( Gallagher)#a ticket to a fake heaven; smothered in indulgent dreams ( Sunday )#just a songbird with clipped wings; in a gilded cage ( Robin )#more than meets the eye aren't you? ( Acheron )
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tag dump.
ANOTHER DUMB BLONDE,BUT WITH A BRAIN! / self.
WE GET MANI-PEDIS,BUT WERE MADE OF MUSCLE! / about.
WE GLADLY PAY OUR DUES WITH EVERY SPRAIN & BRUISE! / abilities.
INTELLECTUAL GIRLS WHO ALSO LOVE THEIR TITTIES. / musings.
I’M SO SICK OF SEVENTEEN,WHERE’S MY FUCKING TEENAGE DREAM? / v1.
UFO SPOTTED IN MILFORD. / v2.
WE SHINE LIKE SMALL TOWN STARS. / v3.
YOU HOLD MY DREAMS,KID,I BURST AT THE SEAMS 'CAUSE OF YOU. / hagan & mindy.
THIRD BASE TOPS! / mindy + zach.
THE HELM OF HADES. / woody.
THE SWORD OF ZEUS. / zach.
THE SHIELD OF ATHENA. / hagan.
THE WINGED BOOTS OF HERMES. / hermes.
ORIGINAL CHAMPION. / adam.
INTELLECTUAL NEUROTIC. / maggie.
THAT'S ABOUT AS THRILLING AS THIS DUMBASS VILLAGE GETS! / milford
#tag dump#SHUT UP ANNA-BELLE. / ooc.#ANOTHER DUMB BLONDE,BUT WITH A BRAIN! / self.#WE GET MANI-PEDIS,BUT WERE MADE OF MUSCLE! / about.#WE GLADLY PAY OUR DUES WITH EVERY SPRAIN & BRUISE! / abilities.#INTELLECTUAL GIRLS WHO ALSO LOVE THEIR TITTIES. / musings.#I’M SO SICK OF SEVENTEEN,WHERE’S MY FUCKING TEENAGE DREAM? / v1.#UFO SPOTTED IN MILFORD. / v2.#WE SHINE LIKE SMALL TOWN STARS. / v3.#YOU HOLD MY DREAMS,KID,I BURST AT THE SEAMS 'CAUSE OF YOU. / hagan & mindy.#THIRD BASE TOPS! / mindy + zach.#THE HELM OF HADES. / woody.#THE SWORD OF ZEUS. / zach.#THE SHIELD OF ATHENA. / hagan.#THE WINGED BOOTS OF HERMES. / hermes.#ORIGINAL CHAMPION. / adam.#INTELLECTUAL NEUROTIC. / maggie.#THAT'S ABOUT AS THRILLING AS THIS DUMBASS VILLAGE GETS! / milford.
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more than anything
Lucifer Morningstar x F!Reader
chapter i > chapter ii > chapter iii
[summary: Charlie Morningstar arrives in hell and meets someone from her dad's past when he was an angel.]
warning: mentions of depression: angst: seemingly unrequited love: loneliness: charlie might be ooc:
Charlie gasped her eyes widened with joy, clasping her hands together jumping up and down excitedly. "Are you Y/n?!" She asked, and the angel looked at her shocked, "You already know about me?" the angel looked at the princess of hell, in disbelief.
"Of course, I do!" She exclaimed, remembering the stories her father used to tell her about, [Y/n].
"My dad would tell me stories about you when I was little!" She said smiling, at [Y/n] who's body tensed up for a moment and her cheeks darkened a little. "Really?" She mumbled, under her breath looking away from the princess for a moment. "I thought he'd forgotten about me." She mumbled, her smile faltering for a moment. Before shaking her head. Forcing a smile on her face.
Charlie looked around the angel's office curiously, "So, your father?" said [Y/n], looking over at Charlie, smiling as she continued to look around the room. "So what did your father tell you about me?" She asked, and the princess of hell nodded.
"Good things I hope?" She said, and the princess of hell looked at the angel. "Of course, he said you were the only angel that believed in him." said Charlie, and the angel smiled reminiscing on times that have long since passed.
"We shared the same dream even adding some ideas onto each others, expanding on them. " said [Y/n], looking down her angelic wings seemed to go limp at her side as she frowned, "That was eons ago," She said, looking down.
Their conversation went on for what seemed like hours, the angel saw so much of the one she loved in his daughter. [Y/n] talked about Lucifer, and stories that he never told Charlie. Charlie watched as the angel's eyes sparkled as she talked about memories. [Y/n]'s heart seemed to swell, and then to suddenly falter back to sadness as she remembered, that she was to shy too scared to confess her feelings for the man she loved.
“You loved him didn’t you?” asked Charlie, and the angel looked over at her in shock and smiled softly, and chuckled softly. “Loved?” said [Y/n], and she smiled her eyes closed as she turned towards Charlie. “I still love him?” She said, her smile forced.
She said, “I couldn't bring myself to tell him,” She wrapped her arms around herself, taking a deep breath and letting out a sigh. “I was afraid of ruining the friendship we already had.” She said, placing her hand on her head her thumb resting on her cheek, as she turned away from Charlie. Letting out a sigh, “I-If he didn’t accept my feelings, I didn't wanna lose what we already had." She bit her lip nervously, and turned back towards Charlie.
“S-So I didn’t." She said, looking at Charlie. The Princess of Hell, could see the sadness and loneliness in her eyes. Eyes that were filled with so much regret, "So, I watched as he fell in love with another." Her voice cracking slightly, clearing her throat she continued.
She pursed her lips inward, "Did and said nothing as he was banished to Hell," She looked down, "But, I can't take back what happened eons ago." She said, forcing a smile on her face as she looked at Charlie.
"So tell me about this Hazbin Hotel, I've been hearing so much about?" She asked, curiously and Charlie's eyes lit up. "Your father, wouldn't of set up a meeting with Heaven, without a reason." She said, and Charlie nodded.
[Y/n] listened intently about Charlie's plan, even though she was going to hear it again in court. She nodded in response smiling, "Sounds intriguing." the angel said, looking at the girl. "I do agree that everyone deserves a second chance." She said, a smile growing across Charlie's face.
"If those sinners that come to the hotel are willing." She added, placing her hands on her desk and sighed. "But, it isn't me who you are going to have too convince." She added, and Charlie looked at her, "But, I believe in the cause." She said, smiling looking at the princess of hell.
[Y/n] looked at Charlie and saw so much of her father in her, her heart couldn't help but ache. "You remind me of your father." Charlie looked at her and smiled, "Thank you, if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here right now." said Charlie, “The apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree.” said [Y/n] a hint of sadness in her voice.
Charlie smiled softly, "You really do love my dad don't you?" asked Charlie, and the angel looked away closing her eyes for a moment. Taking a deep breath and with a solemn look on her face, she turned back towards Charlie. "More than anything." said [Y/n] sadly, the room filled with silence. She still loves him even after eons have since passed they've last seen each other, "Sorry, I shouldn't even be saying this to you." She said shaking her head.
She scoffed at herself, "Telling you his daughter that I've got some silly crush on him," She shook her head and placed her head on her desk, "Ugh, I'm so pathetic!" She groaned, into her desk. For eons, after Lucifer was banished to Hell. [Y/n] hasn't been the same since forcing a fake smile on her face, while doing her daily angelic duties. With a fake smile plastered on her face.
One the inside she was hurting. She was lonely. She was depressed. Filled with so much regret being the cause of her own lonely existence. If she wasn't such a coward maybe things would've ended up differently maybe they wouldn't?
Charlie placed a hand on shoulder causing [Y/n], to lift her head and look up at her. "I'm sure he misses you just as you miss him." said Charlie smiling, trying to comfort the angel as much as she could.
"He used to tell me so many amazing and wonderful things about you," She said. [Y/n]'s lower lip started to quiver as tears welled up in her eyes, hiding her head into desk. She glanced over at the clock on the wall; lifting her head up from the desk. She wiped away her tears, "I-It's almost time for the court meeting. You should probably get ready." said [Y/n], as she stood up from her chair.
"Maybe, you can visit once this is all over?" Charlie said, and the angel looked at her and smiled, "I'm sure that would make both his and yours day." The angel really could see so much of the man she loved in his daughter, "That sounds like a dream to me." said [Y/n], as she walked towards the door and placing her hand on the door knob.
She missed him dearly and for many years she stayed in heaven, wallowing in self-pity and regret. Loneliness and heartbreak. Grieving over the lover she was to cowards to confess her feelings towards.
"But, I don't know. Right now you should focus on convincing the angels." She said looking at the young demon, as her gaze drifted towards the ground. "I-I shouldn't of even mentioned what I said today." She said a solemn look on her face.
"You have nothing to apologize for." She said, looking at Charlie and smiling, "I have only myself to blame." She smiled sadly, and Charlie and the princess of hell a gave her a sympathetic smile. As Charlie left the room, "Charlie?" The Princess stopped and turned around, "When you see him again." She said, "L-Let him know." She stammered, nervously biting her lip her wings limp at her side.
"L-Let him know that I miss him more than anything," She said sadly, and Charlie smiled and nodded. [Y/n] watched as she walked away, and closed the door behind her and turned away. Leaning her back against the door, she sank to the ground and brought her knees to her chest and cried. "I really am pathetic," She sniffled, once again wallowing in self-pity.
"E-Even, if I were to go and visit would he even wanna see me?" She mumbled, maybe she should. She didn't expect anything from it but, maybe it would fill the hole in her immortal heart. The thought of seeing him again brought a smile to her face, she really did love him with every fiber of her being. She envied Lilith and was jealous of her not in a hateful or spiteful way.
She just..[Y/n] sighed, wiping away her tears. Standing to her feet and dusting herself off, taking a deep breath in and exhaling. As she placed her hand on the doorknob, sighed, leaving her office and making her way towards the courthouse.
If only she knew how much he truly did miss her, as on his desk. Sat a rubber duck that shared the same angelic features as her, wings and all. If only she knew how is heart would ache, as he would glance at it.
if only she knew
how much she truly means to him
a/n: ngl..i kinda wanna maybe make her charlie's stepmom.. i mean she still loves lilth of course but.. i mean.. like.. come on.. i should..
#lucifer morningstar x reader#lucifer morningstar x you#lucifer morningstar x y/n#lucifer morningstar fanfiction#lucifer morningstar#charlie morningstar x reader plantonic#charlie morningstar#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel fanfic#angst#seemingly unrequited love#unrequited feelings#hazbin hotel x you#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin hotel headcanon#hazbin
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cryptic | S.R.
You and Spencer get a surprise beyond your wildest dreams.
who? spencer reid x fem!AFAB!reader category: fluff (hurt/comfort a little bit) content warnings: oh geez. pregnancy, periods, weight, medical inaccuracy, cryptic pregnancy, traumatic birth, NICU, hospitals, maybe a little ooc i'm not sure, breastfeeding, reader is running solely on oxytocin, crying. word count: 6k a/n: does anyone else have an irrational fear of this? is it just me? that's why i wrote this anyways. also i wrote this MONTHS ago so if it's bad i'm not culpable. (yall voted for unhinged fluff, here it is) anyways i'm calling this part of my "spencer reid dilf agenda".
him
In his work life, Spencer faced fear every day – that was part of the reason he loved life with you so much. The two of you had just moved to your first house together and were still unpacking boxes when he was called away to upstate New York for a case.
You weren’t frustrated with him; you merely kissed him and encouraged him to go save the day.
So, when he told you last night that you must’ve hurt your back trying to move the couch, he didn’t think anything of it. He just told you to rest and to let him know how you were doing in the morning, but when the morning came, there was a break in the case. Spencer had completely forgotten that he was expecting your call.
As the team waited in the police precinct, he didn’t wonder why Hotch answered a phone call and furrowed his brows at Reid until he called him over to talk in private.
For once, his overactive mind went blank when Hotch explained to him that you were in the hospital and that he should call your best friend, Ivy.
In a daze, Spencer pulled his phone out of his pocket to find that he had missed two calls from you and thirteen calls from Ivy. Isolating himself in an abandoned office, he looked at your friend’s contact and pressed the call button.
The phone didn’t even have a chance to ring before Ivy answered, “Spencer! Oh my god,” she said, sounding relieved to be hearing from him. “I am so sorry for calling your boss. I pulled his number from Y/N’s contacts – I didn’t know how else to reach you, and I- “
“Ivy, what’s wrong?” Spencer asked, teetering between panic and impatience. “She told me she thought he had just pulled a muscle moving,” he explained, wondering what could’ve happened.
On the other end of the call, Ivy took a deep, shaky breath. “She’s okay, but you have to come home,” she whispered, keeping her voice down.
Now he was leaning closer to panic, “Where is she?”
“Northern Virginia Hospital,” Ivy responded. “When you get here, call me, and I’ll bring you to her,” she told him.
Spencer took a deep breath and left the empty office once he ended the call, very nearly running into Hotch, “I need to- “
Holding his hand up in a ‘wait’ gesture, Hotch nodded, “There’s a flight going out, Morgan will drive you to the airport. Don’t worry about anything here,” he instructed him, gesturing over to where Morgan was standing with the keys to one of the SUVs.
After promising to call when he could, a thirty-minute flight, and a ten-minute taxi right, Spencer called Ivy back.
“Hey,” her voice was quiet through the receiver, “are you here?”
He turned around in the lobby of the hospital, “I just came in the front entrance; what wing is she in?” He asked. Which wing would a back injury be in? He supposed it depended on the severity of the back injury.
She cleared her throat and there was a soft rustling before Ivy answered, “Stay put, I’ll come to you.” Her words came out quickly as if she was trying to prevent him from going looking for her.
Then he began to lean closer to impatience, nonetheless, he waited the couple of minutes that it took for Ivy to come out of an elevator, motioning for Spencer to catch up before they took the elevator back up. “Ivy,” Spencer said, “What is happening?”
“She called me at six this morning, saying that she thought she had pulled a muscle in her back and couldn’t sleep. I told her to take some ibuprofen and try to rest, and if she didn’t feel better by lunch, I’d bring her to urgent care. She called me again at ten and told me something was seriously wrong, but she didn’t know what,” Ivy informed him, her voice sounding distant. “She was crying, and I’ve never heard her sound so scared. So, I called an ambulance and met her here while she was triaged…” Her voice trailed off as they exited the elevator.
Spencer’s heart ached at the thought of you being so scared, but it still didn’t answer his question: What happened?
Ivy sniffled and wiped her nose, “Spencer, have you ever heard of a cryptic pregnancy?”
He stopped in his tracks, eyes as wide as saucers, “She’s pregnant?” His words came out as a whisper, a mix of emotions flurried through him.
Your best friend smiled softly at him, “No, she had a baby. That back pain? She was in labor.”
Questions popped into his head quicker than he could ask him. He took a trembling breath, “Where are they?”
She led him around the corner, crossing her arms in front of her chest, “She’s in postpartum recovery, the baby’s up a floor in the NICU. It all happened really fast; you know? Anyways, they kind of whisked the baby away while saying things about Apgar scores that we didn’t really understand.
They stopped for a moment to get Spencer a visitor’s badge before he motioned for Ivy to continue.
Ivy shrugged in response, “She was kind of inconsolable after that, they gave her something to calm her down, but she keeps asking for you,” Ivy said, stopping outside of a door.
Spencer peeked through the blinds to your room. You’re awake, lying on the white bed, absentmindedly picking at the hospital bracelet around your wrist.
“If you need a minute before going in there, take it. Once you go in there, you need to be strong or brave or whatever,” Ivy instructed, putting her hands on her hips. “I’m not saying you can’t be confused or upset, I’d be worried if you weren’t. I’m saying she just gave birth unmedicated without ever even knowing she was pregnant, and they haven’t come back with an update,” she said, looking at Spencer like she was assessing a threat.
He nodded in understanding. Maybe when his head was clear he’d thank Ivy for being so protective of you, but he just nodded. “I need to be in there with her,” he insisted.
Ivy acquiesced, letting him know that she was going to go to the house to get clothes and was going to the store. At that point, Spencer had only been half listening to her.
You didn’t move on the bed when he opened the door. He looked at the whiteboard on the wall, his heart clenching when he saw the words ‘Baby Reid’ written below your name. Spencer quietly walked closer to you before he pulled a chair up so that it was at your bedside and took a seat. He could see tear tracks on your cheeks, “Sweetheart,” he whispered.
Your eyes closed, and two more tears streaked down your cheeks. There was an IV in your wrist and your vitals were being monitored. It wasn’t until Spencer leaned over and smoothed your hair back that you really started to cry.
Gently, Spencer sat on the edge of your bed, and you leaned forward into him. He just held you, running a hand up and down your back as he gently shushed you, “I’m here, darling. I’m here.”
“I had a baby,” you rasped, so quietly that Spencer wasn’t sure if you were telling him or trying to convince yourself that it wasn’t a dream.
He was quiet for just a moment, letting a few silent tears stream down his own cheeks. “I know,” he murmured, “I’m so proud of you.”
You hummed, leaning back ever so slightly, closing your eyes when Spencer kissed your forehead. “I tried calling you,” you whispered, looking up at him with watery eyes and lifting your hands so that you could wipe away the tears.
“I know. I’m so sorry,” he tried to apologize. There was no way for him to navigate this situation, but if he felt this lost, then he couldn’t begin to fathom how you were feeling.
Shaking your head, you waved off his apology, “Did you catch the bad guy?”
He nodded, smiling at your question, “Yeah, we got him this morning. That’s why I didn’t get your call,” he said as he took your hand and intertwined your fingers. “Can I get you anything? Have you eaten? Do you need water?”
A slight smile grew on your face at his concern, a fact that made his heart soar, “I should probably eat something.” The smile faded quickly, “We should probably talk, right?” You asked, leaning forward in the bed to reach for a pile of papers at the foot of the bed.
Noticing a pained look on your face, Spencer set a hand on your shoulder. “I’ll get it,” he said, guiding you so you were lying back on the pillows. “Please be careful,” he reached for the papers and handed them to you.
Quickly, you flipped through the stack of papers that was now in your lap. “I’ve been thinking, you know, and they gave me all of these papers with my options, but we have space at the new house. I work from home most of the time anyway, and we can afford it and- “
Spencer cut you off, leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to your lips. “Yes,” he whispered against your lips before he kissed them again.
Studying you, he watched as you visibly relaxed into your hospital bed. He followed your gaze as you looked out the window of the hospital room, “Spence,” you breathed as a nurse wearing pink scrubs walked into the room.
She looked at him, “Hello, are you dad?”
Dad. He was a dad. Spencer nodded enthusiastically at the nurse.
“I’ve got these bracelets for you two then, they’re to help keep little families like yours together,” she says, loping the white bracelets around both his and your wrist. “Baby’s got two,” she lets you both know. “So, Baby Reid had a hard time breathing at first, but we up in the NICU cleared some of the amniotic fluid from her lungs and everything is looking much better now. Another nurse is bringing the bassinet now…” her voice trailed off when someone knocked on the door.
He wanted to make sure he had heard the nurse correctly. Did she say ‘her’?
The door opened, and it was the tiny hat with the bow that gave it away. She wriggled on the white sheet in her bassinet, looking around her new surroundings. Spencer looked from you to her and couldn’t help the tears that pricked his eyes. It was an emotion that he couldn’t quite place.
Noticing the way you leaned forward, the nurse spoke, “Would you like to hold her?”
“I- Can I? Is she okay?” You asked nervously, for the first time that day, Spencer heard the fear in your voice.
Nodding, the nurse wheeled the bassinet closer to you, helping you move your hospital gown so that you could do skin-to-skin. As she did so, she talked about bonding with a newborn, but Spencer was so enamored watching you that he wasn’t really listening. “We’re estimating that she’s about thirty-five weeks, so she’s late preterm, but she should be able to go home when you do,” the nurse informed you, making sure you were comfortable holding the baby before she stepped back.
The concept of being in a home surrounded by boxes with a newborn stressed him out, but then the tiny baby on your chest let out a squawk and he returned to just watching the two of you.
Both of the nurses left to give the three of you time, and you turned to Spencer, “What was thirty-five weeks ago?” You asked, gently rubbing your thumb over your newborn’s back.
“Exactly? July sixteenth,” he responded, watching your daughter as her eyes shut. “She fell asleep,” he observed, dropping his voice down to a whisper.
You hummed in response, bending your head down and pressing a gentle kiss on the crown of her head. “She needs a name,” you murmured, “we can’t keep calling her baby.”
Spencer leaned over the edge of your bed, “Do you have any ideas?” He asked, even though he already knew you’ve been keeping a list of baby names in your phone for years.
Shrugging ever so slightly, you peered down at your daughter, “All I know is that her last name’s gonna be Reid.” Your eyes flittered up to his, “Please don’t cry. If you cry, I’ll sob, and our daughter is asleep on me, and I don’t want to wake her up.”
“I just love you so much,” he told you softly.
“We can do this, can’t we?” You asked him nervously, narrowing your brows. “She doesn’t have a name. Our house is a disaster. Oh… Spence, we don’t have a car seat. We can’t take her home if we don’t have a car seat.”
Realistically, Spencer knew that you had at least twenty-four hours before you were released from the hospital, maybe forty-eight, given the circumstances. He also knew that you knew this, and he was afraid the events of the day were beginning to take a toll on you. He wasn’t going to say that, instead, he leaned forward and comforted you, “We’ll figure something out, I promise, okay? The name thing we can do.” He encouraged you to take one step at a time, “What about Ivy?”
Your head snapped up, “Really?” You asked, staying conscientious of the newborn on your chest.
“She was there for you through all of this when I couldn’t be,” he shrugged. “Did you know she dug through your contacts on your phone and called Hotch when I didn’t answer?” He watched a small smile tug at your lips, “I just think we should honor her in some way.”
Nodding, a full smile bloomed on your face, “Absolutely.” There was a brief silence, “Do you need to call Hotch? You can step out if you need to. We’re fine alone. I mean just for a little while not for- “
That was the second time you had nearly worked yourself into a panic. Spencer set a hand on your shoulder, “Y/N, angel. Don’t stress yourself out, okay? I’ll handle it.” He promised, after all, you had already done the hard work.
You paused and took a deep breath at his encouragement, leaving the both of you in silence while you caught your breath. “What about Eleanor?”
He smiled and looked at your sleeping baby, “It’s perfect,” he whispered.
The first time Eleanor, who had quickly been nicknamed Nell, cried with the two of you in the room was also the first time Spencer held her. He had been too nervous before, not that he’d tell you that, but when her wails started and he saw you wincing as you sat up in the bed, he instinctively picked her up.
He was still in his work clothes. Granted, he had taken off his tie and the top two buttons of his shirt had been undone, but it didn’t seem to bother Nell, the baby had quickly hushed upon contact. “Sit back,” he gently instructed, “Are you in pain?”
You nestled back into the pillows, “Just a little, they said it’s normal.”
Nothing about this was normal, Spencer wanted to say, but he knew you were well aware. He handed you the baby, knowing that it had been two hours since she last ate and that was likely why she was crying. According to the nurses, she was a good eater. He took their word for it.
Spencer watched you rock gently as Nell ate, you were staring off at nothing, so he asked, “What are you thinking right now?”
“I’m wondering why you’re not more freaked out,” you admitted, looking down at the newborn.
He leaned back in the chair, “I don’t know. I work best under pressure and with a little bit of chaos. It’s also highly likely that the entire situation hasn’t fully sunken in yet.”
You nodded understandingly, “It’s a lot to take in. If you think about it, most parents have months to fully prepare and wrap their heads around it. It’s been about ten hours for me. Maybe six hours for you.”
Nodding, Spencer watched intently as Nell fell asleep, her tiny fists falling and quiet coos coming from her. He heard you say something to him, but the words didn’t process. “What?”
Giggling quietly, you cocked your head at him, “Do you want to hold her?”
“Uh, I don’t know,” he replied honestly. You seemed like you were taking to parenthood exceedingly well, he was afraid he wouldn’t match up.
In the end, it was your understanding smile that prompted him to agree. “Unbutton your shirt,” you ordered, laughing at him when he looked bewildered. “Skin-to-skin isn’t just for moms, Spence. Besides, I want you to bond. I want her to know who you are even when you’re away for work.”
He obliged your request, undoing his shirt so that he could gently place Nell on his bare chest. She squawked while she was being moved from parent to parent but quieted again as soon as she was being held, “she’s so small,” Spencer remarked, marveling at the tiny creature on top of him.
You nodded sleepily, “Four pounds, fourteen ounces. She had to fit behind my ribcage somehow.”
The oddness of the situation began to find a place in him. Were there changes in you that neither of you had noticed? Your period was always irregular, there was no significant weight change, and even morning sickness had seemed to totally pass you by. “I can’t believe we had no idea,” he murmured as he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Nell’s head.
“I went to the doctor three months ago for chest pains, do you remember? I took an at-home pregnancy test just in case and it came back negative. The nurses here told me that there’s a less than one percent chance of that happening,” you informed him, slowly starting to mumble.
Spencer looked up at you to find that your eyes were fluttering shut. “You should sleep. I’ve got this.”
You grunted in protest, “but what- “
“No,” he interrupted. “She just ate, she’s sleeping, and you’re exhausted. I can spend some time with her while you sleep.”
Sleepily, you grinned, sliding down on the bed, and settling your head on the pillows, “Daddy’s girl,” you whispered.
He loved the sound of that.
you
You had always known that Spencer Reid was perfect, and as you watched him fall into the role of father, that knowledge became concrete. You blinked the sleep out of your eyes and kept your gaze on the two of them, not daring to disturb the peace. Instead, you watched in awe as he held your daughter, softly speaking to her as if she could fully comprehend what he was saying.
For all you knew, she could understand what he was saying. She was Spencer’s kid, after all.
Gently, he whispered to her and one of her little fingers gripped his index finger. “Your palmar reflex lets you hold my finger like that, Nellie. It’ll go away when you’re six months old,” he softly swiped his thumb over her back as he murmured to her. “I don’t usually like surprises,” he admitted to the infant, “but you and your mama might just be the best thing to ever happen to me.”
You grinned, reaching your hand out and touching the green armchair, “I love you.” He reached out a hand to hold yours. “Do you want to try to get some sleep?” You offered. Your body still ached, but getting some sleep had made you feel loads better.
“I don’t think I can,” he answered candidly. “I feel so…”
“Wired? Stressed?” You suggested.
He shrugged slightly, “I was going to say hyperaware, but yes,” he responded.
You wheeled the empty bassinet closer to him, “Set her down. Babies can sense stress. Take a minute, catch your breath,” you told him.
Reluctantly, Spencer placed Nell in the bassinet, adjusting the hat on her head while you watched him. “Don’t worry about me,” he said softly.
Your shoulders drooped involuntarily, “When was the last time you slept, love?” After years with Spencer, you know he would go days without sleeping in order to break a case. His lack of a response answered your question well enough. Quickly, you pressed your call button and asked if a nurse could take Nell to the nursery.
Once you made sure the baby was taken care of, you moved over in the hospital bed and patted the open space. “I don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” he told you.
That was the problem with Spencer. He would always put you, and now Eleanor, ahead of himself. It made your heart ache. “Spence, this has been the craziest day, and I can tell you haven’t slept. So, get over here and lay down with me,” you instructed.
Rolling his eyes, Spencer kicked off his shoes before lying next to you in the hospital bed, “Do you promise to wake me if you need anything?” He asked as he gingerly pulled you into his arms, afraid of hurting you.
You hummed, resting your head on his shoulder, “Cross my heart and hope to die.”
“I hate that saying,” Spencer whispered, pressing a tender kiss to your hairline.
Closing your eyes, you relaxed into him, “I promise, angel. Get some sleep.”
You startled awake, looking to make sure you didn’t wake Spencer. Your chest ached as you sat up, cringing at the noise your papery hospital gown made. Gingerly, you placed a hand over your heart, feeling the pounding of your heart and listening to the beeping of the monitor, cursing the screen for making so much noise.
This had happened earlier before Spencer arrived, and the doctor had given you something to calm down then.
When you came into the ER, they thought your appendix was bursting, but when they did an ultrasound, they found that you were in active labor. There was no time for an epidural, they didn’t have time to give you anything for the pain. A kind nurse held your hand and quickly explained what was going to happen.
Within thirty minutes, you arrived at the hospital, gave birth, and had your baby taken to the NICU.
It was too fast; your brain was so overwhelmed that it had shut down. It seemed like a ridiculous thought; how did you miss the birth of your daughter?
Hiccupping back a sob, you felt a comforting hand on your back, but the fact that you had woken Spencer up just made you cry harder. He wrapped his arms around you, and you buried your face in the crook of his neck. “Shh, it’s alright,” he cooed, rubbing small circles on your back. “I love you so much, you know that, right? I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you,” he comforted you. “It’s okay, it’s just all catching up with you, honey.”
You pulled away, wiping the tears from under your eyes. “It’s okay,” you repeated his words.
“What do you need right now?” He asked, smoothing your hair back. “Do you want to make a list? Do you want to move around?”
Nodding absentmindedly, you watched as Spencer pressed the call button and got up, helping you stand. Your legs shook, and you felt a bit like a foal, but it felt good to be out of bed. You haphazardly finger-combed your hair before stepping into hospital slippers and leaving the room. For now, the nurses instructed you to just walk around the maternity ward.
As the two of you walked around, you made several lists. Things you needed to buy. People you needed to call.
By the time you’d returned to the room, Ivy had returned. Spencer opened the door for you and helped you sit on the end of the bed.
“I’ve come bearing gifts,” Ivy greeted, grinning with bags in her hands. She gestured to a suitcase, “First, clothes for both of you. I just grabbed whatever I thought might be good. Toiletries and stuff too,” she said, rolling the suitcase off to the side. “I grabbed a couple of newborn outfits, but again, I was kind of flying blind. The lady at the department store was extremely helpful.” She handed Spencer a bag of baby clothes. “I got a car seat, the same lady recommended it, she was probably getting a commission, but it’s in my car. I have approximately zero idea how to set it up, but I figured, Spencer has a doctorate in engineering. He can do it.”
You glanced blearily at your best friend, “Ivy, you didn’t have to do all of this. This is too much,” you confessed, holding a tiny onesie in your hand.
She dismissed your insistence with a wave of her hand, “I also got this.” Ivy held out a small stuffed duck. “I know it won’t do her much good now, but I couldn’t help myself.”
After you changed out of your hospital garb, you looked at Spencer, “Go call Hotch, we’ll be good here for a while.” You gestured to your best friend, who was filtering through the suitcase she had packed, trying to find your hairbrush. At your request, he told you he’d also ask the nurse to bring Nell back down so that Ivy could meet her.
Once he was gone, Ivy sat behind you on the bed and brushed through your hair, tucking it out of your face, you were finally beginning to feel a little bit more like yourself by the time she had finished.
You watched intently as the nurse arrived at the door, “Do you want to meet her?”
Ivy nodded enthusiastically, lips parting as she observed the small baby. “Is that her name?” She rasped, looking at the card on the bassinet, Eleanor Ivy Reid. “That’s not funny, don’t joke about stuff like that.”
“Yeah,” you whispered, keeping your voice down as Eleanor slept. “It’s not a joke, and for the record, it was Spence’s idea,” you informed her, reaching into the bassinet, and scooping up the now-swaddled infant. “He’s so grateful that you were there for me, and I am too.”
She smiled, “I’m always going to be here for you two – you three now. Number one babysitter,” she said, pointing to herself.
You sighed and looked from your friend to your daughter, “She’s got a whole FBI unit of babysitters.”
“I’ll be here when they’re away – when Spencer’s away,” she reminded you, carefully adjusting the hat on the baby in your arms.
The last thing you wanted to think of was Spencer being gone, leaving you to take care of a baby you weren’t ready for.
Ivy must have sensed your nerves, “Hey, you know I’m always in your corner, right?”
You nodded slowly, “It’s just all catching up with me. I have to call my mom. I have to call my boss. How do you retroactively apply for maternity leave?”
“One thing at a time,” she said soothingly. “Right now, just enjoy your time with your perfect little family. I’ll call your mom for you,” she offered. “If your boss gives you any grief, he’ll have to deal with me.” Standing up, she placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, “I’m going to go get food, do you two still have the same orders from the deli?”
Confirming with her, you moved so that you could feed Nell, watching her as she looked up at you. “She’s right, you know? You are perfect,” you cupped her head with your hand, looking up to find Spencer watching from the doorway.
“Hotch says congratulations,” he spoke gently, striding over to your bedside and sitting on the edge of the bed. “He also said to let the team know if we needed anything,” he let you know, pressing a kiss to your forehead. He continued to let you know that Hotch had offered to figure out Spencer’s paternity leave, and while you felt bad about giving Hotch something else on his to-do list, it felt nice to have one less thing on yours.
You nodded, “Ivy’s gonna call my mom, so that’s two things off of our list.”
Spencer squeezed your shoulder, “They asked if they could come to visit, but I didn’t want to answer for you.” He moved back to the armchair, “I just said we’d let them know.”
“At the very least we’ll send a picture,” you murmured. “I’m surprised you’re not researching newborns right now.”
Raising his eyebrows, Spencer shrugged, “I asked one of the nurses if I could get access to the hospital library.”
You snorted, “Of course you did.”
No one from the BAU ended up visiting while you were in the hospital, mainly because the idea of too many people in the one hospital room made you anxious, but both you and Eleanor had been cleared to go home. Eventually, you would have to allow visitors.
“Spencer, you can go the speed limit,” you said from the backseat of the car, not taking your eyes off of the baby in her car seat.
He glanced back in the rearview mirror, “This stretch of road is bumpy. I don’t want to wake her.” Despite his anxieties, he was taking to fatherhood remarkably well.
You shook your head, “She’s already awake, babe.” She looked around her new surroundings, spending part of the six hours a day that she was awake going home for the first time. Part of the beauty of a newborn was that they slept for eighteen hours a day, but only in about fifty-minute bursts.
Spencer kept glancing back, and you made a mental note to get a mirror for the rear-facing car seat.
As he turned onto your street, you sat up slightly. “Who’s here?” You asked, looking at the cars in your driveway. You recognized Ivy’s car, but none of the others rang any bells.
“That’s JJ’s car, and that’s Morgan’s truck,” Spencer told you as he pulled into the driveway. Once he got out of the car, he ran around to where you were sitting. He opened the door, taking the car seat out of its base before helping you out of the car. “I had no idea they were here,” he said curiously.
You hummed thoughtfully, looking at Eleanor in her car seat. There was a part of you that felt horrible, you didn’t have anywhere for her to sleep set up. Another part of you knew that she’d be just fine sleeping in your arms while Spencer set something up. “Far be it from the BAU to abandon one of their own in their time of need,” you murmured, stepping through the front door as Spencer held it open for you.
Setting the carrier on the coffee table, you undid the clips so that you could hold the baby. As you lifted her, her legs scrunched up until you held her to your chest, at which point she settled.
“Where are they?” You asked, gently rubbing Nell’s back as she started to fall asleep on you. You peeked around the corner into the kitchen, across the counter, there were bottles set out to dry, along with other various baby things. “Oh, Spence,” you breathed.
There was a distinct lack of boxes in your house, they weren’t entirely unpacked, but there were much less than there had been when you left. A crash from upstairs got both of your attention, Spencer’s arm instinctively going around your waist.
Together, the two of you walked upstairs, finding members of the BAU in one of the rooms that was going to be a guest room setting up a nursery. “Hey?” You said, peeking in through the doorway.
“Oh my god!” Penelope said, “Wait, crap, sleeping baby.” She covered her mouth with her hands, horrified at the idea of disturbing the sleeping infant.
You smiled, looking around suspiciously, “What’s going on here?”
Rossi waved a finger at you, “Your best friend is a drill sergeant is what’s going on here.”
Confused, you turned around to see Ivy with her hands on her hips. “I thought you weren’t coming home until the afternoon,” she explained, “I was going to have them all out of here so you could have a nice peaceful house.”
“You enlisted the BAU to unpack our house?” You asked her, tears pricking at your eyes.
Ivy shrugged, “It started as just asking a question, but we all came to the same conclusion. The two of you were never going to ask for help, so we had to take matters into our own hands.” She wiped her hands on her jeans, “Plus, they have kids, so they actually knew what you needed,” she gestured to JJ and Hotch.
You leaned forward to give her a one-armed hug, keeping yourself mindful of the baby. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Penelope hugging Spencer.
JJ stepped forward, “I’m around. Any questions you have,” she assured you. “How are you feeling?”
Laughing nervously, you looked up at Spencer, “Still reeling.”
The rest of the team laughed too, which brought you some semblance of comfort. “I almost thought you were playing a prank,” Emily confessed.
“No, you definitely thought they were trying to prank us. You didn’t believe them until they sent the picture,” Morgan said, exposing her.
Appalled, Emily rolled her eyes, but you spoke up, “I’m not sure I would have believed us either.” Had you not experienced it firsthand, you definitely would’ve been skeptical. Eleanor was going on two days old, and you had still woken up wondering if it was all some kind of dream.
Spencer had previously told everyone that no one could hold her. He was concerned about germs. You echoed his concerns, just maybe not as strongly. So, instead, everyone just cooed at her until Spencer gently ushered you into your bedroom.
You let out a sigh of relief when you spotted a bassinet set up next to your bed. Gently, you set her down while Spencer pulled the bedding down, “You should rest,” he told you softly.
“Spence, I just spent the majority of the last two days in a bed. I’m tired of bed,” you responded, sitting down on the ledge of the bed.
He hummed in response, “You just had a baby.”
Reaching out, you took his hands in yours, “Moving around will be good for me. I promise not to do anything to tear my stitches. I’ll just show Nell the house.”
“Babies don’t recognize their surroundings until four to six months, so she wouldn’t recognize anything you showed her anyway,” he told you.
You narrowed your eyebrows at him, “Spencer."
He held up his hands in concession, “Right, overbearing.”
“Hey,” you said softly, “We’re still figuring this out, right? So, we’ll take it one step at a time.” You offered, having already had an in-depth discussion about being okay with making mistakes. “Why don’t we go check out the nursery?” You stood up, watching as Spencer carefully picked Nell up, cradling her in his arms.
You led the way into the hallway to find JJ, Morgan, and Ivy finishing the nursery. Morgan and JJ moved the crib to a different side of the room while Ivy placed books on a shelf.
Ever so slightly, you leaned into Spencer, glancing at the sleeping infant in his arms, you reached over and cupped her head with your hand. “This is your family, Nell,” you whispered, smiling when Spencer leaned down to press a kiss to the crown of your head.
That was your first lesson in parenthood, it really does take a village.
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who would let the world burn for you? cw: yandere themes, mentions of blood and dead bodies. angst. possible oocness. gn! reader.
I LET THE WORLD BURN, I LET THE WORLD BURN FOR YOU, THIS IS HOW IT ALWAYS HAS TO END.
FIREFLY/SAM would gladly let the world burn if it guarantees your safety. you’re like an ever-lasting flame they can physically cradle in their hands; you give them hope, a purpose. what makes you think they’ll purposely snuff you out for a world—the universe who didn’t dare to show not an ounce of mercy to them?
sam gently holds you in their arms, green wings resembling flames behind their back. behind them is a vast sea of angry fire—burning buildings and corpses sam doesn’t bother to look back to as they walks away from the ruined civilization. “ sam. .” you weakly whisper, the mecha looks down. if it could frown as it scans the cuts and nasty bruises littered all over your body, they would.
“ i came here for you. “ sam says, their voice soft and full of worry reserved only for you, “ it wasn’t apart of the script but i couldn’t bear to stand by and let you do everything by yourself. i feared that you could’ve. .” a familiar feminine voice blends in with sam’s low robotic one as they trailed off.
they fall silent when your shaky hand reaches out to touch sam’s “ face “, soft orange flames sizzles out from their metal slits.
I LET THE WORLD BURN, JUST TO HEAR YOU CALLING OUT MY NAME, WATCHING IT ALL GO DOWN IN FLAMES
KAFKA would let the world burn to show you what she’s willing to do for you. she wants to see the look on your face when everything is in flames because of her.
“ k-kafka. .” you mutter, backing away in fear as she saunters closer to you, stepping over dead bodies with no regard. her velvet lips stretches into a grin, teeth baring as orange flames are reflected in her eyes, making her look menacing. “ there’s no need to look so fearful, ” she drawls, stretching her arms wide as she draws nearer and nearer. “ you know i wouldn’t dream of laying a finger on my precious doll. “
you backed up against a cracked brick wall, legs trembling as she finally in arms length. “ y-y-you, wh-wh—“ kafka chuckles, placing a gloved hand on your cheek, her pinkish purple hues stares into your own. “ use your words, darling. i’m listening. “
“ wh-why? “ you choked out, (e/c) eyes filled with tears. kafka hums, placing the other hand on your cheek, now cradling your face. “ why? it’s simple, really. you may think the reason why i’m doing this is to make you suffer or something cliche straight out of a boring hero vs villain flim. hmm, it’s none of that. “
she leans closer to your face until her lips brush against yours. “ it’s an act of love. all i did was make it dramatic, isn’t it ironic? “
I SHOULD’NT HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE, LOOK AT WHAT IT MADE ME BECOME
RUAN MEI never could understand the concept of love due to her trauma and just couldn’t emotionally grasp it. but you—you made the loose ends stretch and connect and she finally gets to have a taste of what it means to love. but soon after, things began to spiral out of control—specifically her emotions. it’s now always you, you, you on her mind. it’s frustrating because it’s making her think irrational, illogical things. so, will she let the world burn for you? yes—undoubtedly so.
ruan mei winds her slender arms around your waist, guiding you into her midst. her cool breath fans against your skin as she outlines your cheekbone with her lips. and she doesn’t stop there—no, she’s moving down to the corner of your lips, jawline, neck, and then right at a certain spot where she feels your pulse. it’s slow and steady. a hand trails up your arm and eventually three fingers press against the opposite side of your neck. a blue light and a warm tingle follows suit.
“ ruan mei, you don’t have to do all of that. i’m alive. “ you sighed. ruan mei moves back a bit to peer into your eyes, she touches your cheek. “ i’m aware. “ she says softly, contrary to the glint in her eyes, a emotion that you can’t recognize—a emotion so passionate yet ominous that it sends a chill down your spine.
“ and I’ll keep it that way. “
I LET YOU GET TOO CLOSE, JUST TO WAKE UP ALONE
AND I KNOW YOU THINK YOU CAN RUN, YOU’RE SCARED TO BELIEVE THAT I’M THE ONE
BUT I CAN’T LET YOU GO
ACHERON allowed herself to get swallowed up by the waves of love—she allowed it to rush through the cracks of her heart and fill up the emptiness within. you’ve imprinted on her soul and now she’s hopelessly devoted to you. if the world must burn for you to be by her side, so be it. the world means nothing if you’re not in it.
her white tresses flows into the wind as she calmly walks towards you. her ruby eyes settled only on you as the once blue sky is ripped apart with one clean red slash and ruins scattered everywhere behind her. “ acheron. .what have you done? “ you asked in disbelief, holding onto your shattered blade. “ what needed to be done.” acheron merely replies, snatching your forearm and pulled you into her possessive embrace.
“ you didn’t need to do this and you know it! why did you fight me to stop me?! i could of saved millions of lives if it meant giving up my own. a whole civilization is gone now! people—ch-children! “ you sobbed, pushing your palms against her shoulders to escape her hold. acheron holds you tighter into her strong body and buried her nose into the side of your neck. it’s wrong, so, so wrong for her to do something so reckless—so selfish to discard innocent life for the safety of your own. but she’s gone through enough loss and suffering and the hole in her heart is full of you—her everything. if you died, she fears that she would of. .
“ forgive me, forgive me, “ acheron mutters into your skin like a prayer, “ i’m truly a coward but i’d gladly continue to be so if i can hold you in my arms like this. “
FEAR IN THEIR EYES, ASH RAINING FROM THE BLOOD ORANGE SKY, I LET EVERYONE KNOW THAT YOU’RE MINE
jingliu is letting everything burn. you’re her beloved— she would do anything for you. her blade will cut through anything and everything, even the moon itself to prove that to you.
her glowing, red feral eyes matched the color of the sky as corpses of the cloud knights laid around her like a ritual circle. jingliu looks at you and smiles lovingly in contrast to the horrific act she’s done. “ darling, come here. “ she softly commands, lifting her hand (which is stained with the blood of many!) out to you, waiting for you to take it and join her. you shake your head with terror, your body trembling. “ n-no, jingliu. th-this is madness! “
jingliu tilts her head to the side, her expression falls expressionless. then, she takes a step towards you, her hand falling limp to her side. “ this is madness you say? how laughable, my dear, “ she lets out a breathy laugh and casts you a chilling smile. “ this is hardly anything. once i annihilate the abundance in your name, only then you can speak to me about madness.”
honorable mention
I’D LET THE WORD BURN, I’D LET THE WORLD BURN FOR YOU
STELLE intentionally and unintentionally would let the world burn for you without a doubt. she’d choose you over the world, not caring about how bad it’ll make her seem. all she’s really thinking about is you and not the full consequences of her choice. and because of the astral express, things will get complicated. ultimately, you’ll be the one to give yourself up if the situation really requires you to step up. she’ll prob need to be held back.
“ we don’t have much time, i’ll go. i’ve dropped it anyways. “ you volunteered with a heavy heart, looking back at the city covered in flames. dan heng and march quickly opens their mouth to speak but stelle beats them to it, “ no, you’re not! i-if you’re going, then i’ll go with you! “ she shouts, taking your hand into hers, “ it’s just an artifact—“
“ an artifact that is needed to save this planet and it’s not like dan heng can use his powers either because he’s just going to flood everything and march you already exhausted yourself which means i have to—“
march chimes in, “ h-hold on a minute, even i think it’s a bad idea to go back in by yourself!everything is covered with smoke and ash, there’s no way you can find it on the ground somewhere and you can’t see anything! we need to call welt and himeko—“
“ okay, you call them and i’ll go find it. i know it’s a terrible plan but we’re out of options guys. stelle. please, let go of my hand and stay with dan heng and march. “
stelle stubbornly refuses, “ no. i said i’ll go with you so i am. if you think you’re going to go by yourself then you’re absolutely silly. if it was my choice, i wouldn’t let you go at all. “
your brows furrow with frustration, “ no, you’re being silly, stelle. look—we don’t have time to argue! you’re not going with me! “ without thinking, you jabbed your fist hard into her stomach, causing her to gasp and kneel over in pain. she still holds onto your hand but you hastily break free from her weakened grip. “ i have to go! dan heng! hold stelle back if she tries to follow me! give me 5 minutes tops, i’ll come back! promise! “ you dash towards the burning city, covering your nose in search of finding the lost artifact.
“ no! “ she screams horsely as she watches your figure run further and further away and eventually disappear into the sea of smoke. although in pain, stelle attempts to get back up and run after you. dan heng swiftly restrain her. “ l-let me go, dan heng! can’t you see what’s they’re doing?! it should of been me! no, not even me—the world should just burn! “ she screams at the top of her lungs, tears rolling down her cheeks.
#trendy#firefly x reader hsr#kafka x reader#acheron x reader#ruan mei x reader#stelle x reader#jingliu x reader#honkai star rail women x reader
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Lost and found
Self-Aware BSD AU x SAGAU Imposter crossover
Self-Aware! BSD Characters x GN! Reader
Description: You dissapeared a month ago. You finally returned home.
Warning: OOC. Religious fanaticism. Non-descriptive torture. Reader almost get killed. English is my second language.
Normally, the atmosphere in the house was happy. Kids were playing on the playground, Akutagawa siblings often watch movies in the living room, Oda and Kunikida discussed books in the library. Sigma can start a spontaneous poker game. And much, much more.
But, most importantly, there were you.
In one moment, you were reading books with Poe, and Karl was sitting on your lap.
Next moment you were fooling around with Nikolai.
Then you were having a competition, where Tachihara with Teruko on his shoulders were racing against Tetchou with you on his back.
It was fun.
It didn't last.
The day you disappeared became the worst day of their lives.
No more laughing.
No more having fun.
They were searching for you.
Looking under every branch in the forest.
Breaking in every house, where people, that have even smallest disagreement with you.
Sleepless nights.
And constant search.
For their Dear Guiding Light.
______
Different religions have different things, that can be considered blasphemy. Yes, some acts can be called "universal" blasphemy. That everyone, no matter, where they are from and what their beliefs are, would call such acts blasphemy.
But, some religions, have something, that only for them will be viewed as blasphemy.
In Teyvat any resemblance to the All-Creator was the act of blasphemy. The worst sin. The High treason.
And sinners must be punished for the heinous act.
Creator would sit on their ivory throne and command their holy knights to destroy the Corruption.
Because The Embodiment of Divinity can't be wrong. Because The One, who brought life, are doing it for the good of the Teyvat.
So, when the news about another Sinner being spotted in Mondstadt reach Creator, they ordered their Divine Knights to Purge the Sin from Teyvat.
Creator love Teyvat. Creator love humans. Creator destroyed Celestia, an embodiment of Sin, that tried to destroy Creator, the moment they sat on the ivory throne.
Creator were freedom. That's why Barbatos didn't feel bad, commanding wings of Teyvat to feed the fire, that Knights of Favonius set, to burn the small cottage with you inside.
Creator were following their contact, the promise to protect Teyvat. That's why Morax didn't bat an eye, throwing a stone spear at a boat, where you were hiding.
Creator were internal. So Baal didn't regret unleashing the power of lightning on you.
Creator were a fake. It was real knowledge. But Real Sinner have power. Nahida were sorry, that she and Aranara's could give you only a small break.
Creator were Justice. Fontaine people were ready to hung you up. Real Sinner have power. Furina and Melusines were hiding you as long as they can. When you saw the enraged Neuvillette, who was ready to destroy the village, you left by your own accord.
For Creator, they would start a war. In Natlan you were almost caught. By pure luck, Columbina's attack didn't end your life.
Fatui's dream became reality, because of the Creator. Snezhnaya's people were ready to tear you apart.
Instead, they tie you up and drag you to the Ivory Throne.
_______
You didn't like being transported to Teyvat.
Yes, it was beautiful. But, you missed your friends and family. You missed BSD Gang.
Worst of all, you didn't have your phone with you. You can't even try to reach out to your world.
You decide to find Traveler, or Abyss Sibling, or Alice. Maybe, they can send you home?
You wished you stay in the wilderness.
People of Teyvat hated you. Traveler hated you. Abyss Sibling hated you.
Everyone called you a disgrace. Sinner. Corruption, that must be purged.
They try to burn you alive.
They chased you like a wild animal.
They wanted to kill you.
And every person who tried to help you were punished.
You had no idea, what happened to Nahida and Aranaras. And you hopped that Yoimiya, her father, Furina and Melusines were fine.
You were captured a week ago.
Week, full of torture.
Of boiling water, that was poured down your throat.
"Dirty heretic! Accept the cleansing of your soul from impurities!"
Of hot iron on your skin. Of terrible scars on your chest.
"Heretic"
And you were forced on your knees before an Ivory Throne.
Your exact double raise their hand.
And Five archons and one Hydro Sovereign attacked.
Arrows of Anemo. Spear of Geo. Sword of Electro. Wave of Hydro. Claymore of Pyro. Wave of Cryo.
You can't even scream. Boiling water burned your tongue and throat.
You were tried and wished for one thing.
To finally be safe.
The moment, before you were hit, the portal appeared under your legs.
___________________________
It was nighttime.
All of them gather in the living room.
Another day of fruitless search.
And no trace of you.
Suddenly, they heard a noise from the outside. The empty barn was shaking. The wight light was visible through the cracks in the old wood.
Everyone hurried here.
Tetchou got here first and opened the door.
Light faded.
You were there
You were laying on the floor.
Tortured. Branded.
And alive.
Chaos started. No one can stay silent even for a second.
Yosano got near you in a second. Not only because she ran towards you. Tachihara and Akutagawa literally carried her to you. Yosano used her ability without second thought.
Now, healed, you were still laying on the floor. From time to time, you let out a quiet sobs and 'please, I just want to go home'.
Everyone was panicking. Asking if you were alright. If you will be okay.
Fukuchi carried you home.
______
You were unconscious.
They bathed you, change your clothes and try to make you as safe as possible.
You were laying on your bed, covered in every blanket they can find. They brought even their own blankets. Somewhere in there were laying Rimbaud's coat, that he cover you with.
Your room was full of people.
BSD Cast were sitting on the floor, on the windowsill, on the edge of your bed.
Everyone was there. Even kids were allowed to stay up.
They were sitting close to each other. No one could phantom a thought of leaving you even for a second.
The night was sleepless.
_____
You thought, that you were dead in went to the afterlife.
Because, you can feel, that you were warm and laying on something soft.
You don't want to open your eyes. You wanted to stay in a warm, safe place.
More senses were back.
You heard birds singing.
And quiet sobs. Sound of steps.
And whispers.
"Myshonok, you can't leave us. Please, come back..."
"[Y/N], it's okay, take your time. You will soon be better, right? We will have fun pranking Vagabond..."
"The world without you will never be ideal... [Y/N]... Darling... Come back..."
Some voices sound closer.
"[Y/N]... Please, Birdy, woke up... My Dear, I missed you so much, please, come back!"
Someone was holding your hand, squeezing it. You feel, how, that someone's tears fall on your knuckles.
Another voice. This one touch your shoulder. The voice sounded broken.
"[Y/N], my precious Iris Flower... Wake up... I beg you..."
They also were crying...
Birdy... Iris Flower... Could it be?
You opened your eyes.
______
Two pair of eyes, one - dark brown, second - green and grayish came into your line of sigh.
Dazai Osamu and Nikolai Gogol.
Were you seeing things? Or you really were back.
You manage to whisper. You feel, that your tongue and throat weren't burned anymore.
"K-Kolya? Osamu?"
You looked around. Your friends were here.
"G-guys... E-Everyone..."
Before you can finish, you were swarmed by your friends.
Everyone tried to see you, to touch you. Kyuusaku, who manage to get to the front, climbed on your bed and hugged you.
"I knew it! I knew that you will be back! That you will return. B-because I told them all... that you will come back... you will certainly come back" Kyuusaku sobbed. Suddenly, they looked angry. "Where were you?! We were waiting for you... Searching for you... but you... completely, completely disappeared!"
You bit your lip and drew blood. For one moment, angry shouts of "SINNER" filled your ears.
Q cried again and hid their smeared face in your chest.
No. They are your friend. They won't hurt you.
You carefully hugged Q. You didn't feel any pain. You remind yourself to thank Yosano later.
"Good question, where were you, [Y/N]? Who... Hurt you?" spoke Mori. And you flinched.
One of the worst thing during The Imposter Hunt was Zhongli. More specifically, his voice, that sounds so similar to Mori's. During Nightmare-filled nights, that voice was cursing you, threaten you, promising to tear you apart.
In reality, you saw Zhongli saying that words. In your Nightmares, you saw Mori.
Zhongli made you scared of your friend!
Everyone noticed your reaction. Yosano spoke.
"[Y/N]... What happened? You were on a brick of death, when we found you..."
You still couldn't say a word. You were scared. You were terrified of returning to Teyvat.
Fukuzawa spoke next. He carefully picked up Kyuusaku and put them down on the floor. Then Fukuzawa with the same carefulness, propped you up against your pillow.
"We will discuss it later. Right now, [Y/N] need some food. Kitten, are you hungry?"
You slowly nodded. Oda, who was standing near the door, immediately left to get food from the kitchen.
The others stay in your room, looking at you.
This exact moment they made a promise to themselves.
They will destroy everything and everyone, who have hurt you.
And they will make sure, that this people will suffer.
#self-awarebsd#self-awareau#bungou stray dogs au#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd anime#bsd x gender neutral reader#gender neutral reader#imposter sagau#genshin impact sagau#genshin sagau#sagau#sagau impostor au
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