#༄ apple of my eyeིྀ

[desireelovesyou]

╰╴╴━╮ desiree ིྀ ✧*。she ,, they + neos

minor | ━━ demigirl ,, poc//blk

single ༄ enfp ; lots of signs of bpd

˚. ⊹ i am a man-eating eldritch horror ━━ (。ŏ﹏ŏ)

➳ asks and dms are almost always open! pls talk to me, i love making friends

▸ᙏ̤̫͚ my other more normal sideblog (we don’t talk abt the main) ⊹˙∘

dni: erm…i’ll block whoever i want (๑°⌓°๑) jst please don’t be weird. this is my vent acc AND IM A MINOR!!! so all i ask is for you not to come on here and fetishize anything or be like….creepy (i’m okay with good creepy, i mean like bad creepy) !!

byi: this is a vent account, there will be talk of sh (never too graphically :p), suicidal thoughts, obsessive thoughts, bpd related posts and content, my sa (never graphically), psychological abuse, etc. overall just sad and deranged thoughts xx! i’m happy to talk to anyone but i get attached very quickly so jst keep that in mind

tags:

༄ bleeding heartsིྀ = a vent!!

༄ belovedsིྀ = my friends/moots!!

༄ pink inkིྀ= random stuff! usually when i’m in a good mood :3

༄ apple of my eyeིྀ = me tweaking over something obsessively (platonic or otherwise!!)

༄ absolutelyིྀ = reposts!!

༄ signed, desireeིྀ = asks !!

༄ cupidིྀ = VERY HAPPY!

ANONS !!: my prince, doll, 🐦‍⬛, mochi

[desireelovesyou]

i miss you

i can handle being treated like shit over and over again, but i can not handle you leaving me

[desireelovesyou]

i would kill myself if you ever outright told me i meant nothing to you! so maybe, please- don’t do that

some things never change, the way our love is a poison i find myself willing to drink is certainly one of them.

[desireelovesyou]

i love you and if you were to ever leave me you would completely flip my life upside down. you wouldn’t do that to me, right???? you love me enough to not want to hurt me that way?

you can do anything you want baby, anything but leave

[desireelovesyou]

i love like a dog but not in the cute way.

i love like a dog who’s frothing at the mouth for attention- who will growl and bare its teeth whenever someone tries to get too close to you and then whimper when you scold it.

i love like a dog who’s only known the hardness of cobblestone steps and will do anything to keep its soft and clean place at the foot of your bed.

i love like a dog that will find its way home no matter how many times you throw it out because the warmth of a closed door that it knows you reside behind is better than being alone.

i love like a dog that would rather the harshness of a terrible owner than the kindness of a stranger because they’re not you.

i love like a dog that has its teeth buried deep and would rather die than ever let you go.

i love like a dog.

[desireelovesyou]

to still love the person you can’t have

i really could use you right about now. i long to cry into your shoulder. for you to brush your hands through my hair and run them along my back. i could use your hug.

[desireelovesyou]

btw ily and there’s no one for me but you <3 every second away from you is like dying over and over and over again! come home or im going to find u xx

JUST KIDDING!! (i am NOT fucking kidding)

[desireelovesyou]

i’m so sweet and pretty and lovely and i will love you to death if you’d just let me. i’ll ruin myself for you, break my own heart to see you happy- i’ll drag my lips over my teeth and hold back my snarl and swallow all of my desperate whines.

i’ll be a good dog, nothing like the stray you first met- nothing like the wild animal. i’ll clean myself up and wait for you patiently and with a big smile and i’ll try not to show the way jealousy makes me wish i could grab you by your shoulders and shake you until you realize there is nothing in this world for me but you.

everyone has someone, YOU are all I HAVE. would you really be so fucking selfish to give yourself away to someone else? someone who has everything i dont? someone who has so many goddamn fucking toys they may as well own a toy store? i LOVE YOU? i ACTUALLY love you? i’d let you do anything to me and this is what you decide to do? throw me aside like garbage?

well baby too bad because you will always love me and i’ll always be waiting for you.

[desireelovesyou]

me explaining why my tweaker4tweaker4tweaker4tweaker4tweaker- so on and so forth- friend group is actually amazing and why you should all be jealous that you can’t get your grubby paws on friends like mine…heh:

[desireelovesyou]

me when the ppl i love dare to have a life outside of me

rolling around throwing up vomiting banging my head against the wall screaming running around rolling on the floor again throwing up again crying passing out waking back up and then crying again

[desireelovesyou]

i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy i am happy

i have absolutely learned how to live without you🧘🏾‍♀️ (hey so!! need you to come back rn!! losing my mind without you!!! hope this helps!!)

[desireelovesyou]

date idea: i’m crying and begging you not to leave me. you take my hand, give me a warm kiss on the forehead, hold me close and lean in. your breath will tickle the hair around my ear, hot and smelling like the stuff you smoke (it is a scent i’ve come to adore.) you will whisper. “i love you.”

and then you will squeeze my hand and we will run very, very far away. it will be just you and i, and the animals you promised me we would adopt one day.

[desireelovesyou]

come hold me precious baby, fill my cracks with your lies of forever and watch how whole i become just for you. watch how everything in me aches to make you proud, throbs to be seen and cherished by you.

tell me to grow and watch me blossom, tell me to die and watch me collapse into my grave. tell me what to do, and for you? for my world? for a sliver of your heart? god, i’ll do it

i’ll act out every wish, every request- you won’t ever have to beg. doing what you ask of me comes naturally

[desireelovesyou]

guys i lied i have amazing friends that are literally my world and i totally, in fact, do not regret waking up anymore!!!! i love my friends they’re all amazing and perfect and i cherish them all deeply and honestly? i’m so excited to make a friend group with them and keep them all to myself!!!

[desireelovesyou]

i’m so sorry for everything and i’m sorry and i’m so sorry and i just wanna be yours again and there’s nothing i wouldn’t do to be your friend

please i don’t wanna do this anymore im sobbing and i miss you and life is so hard without you

[desireelovesyou]

uhm… i made an oopsie and listened to lana del rey while having a breakdown and accidentally cried my eyes out and accidentally clicked on snap and accidentally clicked your profile on snap and accidentally sent you an essay begging for our friendship back.

whoops.