#ִֶָ 𓂃˖ mimi writes?!

[y2kuromi]

✶ : ❛ 𝗦𝗨𝗕𝗨𝗥𝗕𝗔𝗡 𝗟𝗘𝗚𝗘𝗡𝗗𝗦 : rin itoshi x reader ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

˖ ִֶָ𐀔 contents : angst , fluff, fem! reader (can be read as gn! hopefully).post argument.est rel. second person (you/your/yours) and third person pov. profanities w/c: 1.4k

if you'd told rin itoshi he would be standing outside your house pleading desperately to be let in — voluntarily — in the cold he would've called you a crazy idiot. or probably something worse. but here he was doing just that. wringing his hands nervously in the woollen cavern of his gloves as he stood on your porch, chilling wind freezing his cheeks and snowflakes tangling in hair and sticking to his long eyelashes

he contemplated leaving. he pondered trudging back home in the still falling snow, with a still broken heart and his pride intact. but he couldn't bring himself to walk through the darkening night. so he stayed.

if he persisted you would forgive him..hopefully. he knew he didn't deserve that. he could barely remember what you'd even argued about in the first place. he just knew he'd crossed a line.

you hadn't spoken to him in three days. and he hadn't tried to contact you. he'd felt tortured by guilt and now all he wanted was for the silent treatment to stop. he was waving the white flag. the way he should've, instead of sharpening his words and wounding you with them

rin was sorry he'd said those things...such awful things. he was a terrible person and you deserved so much better than him. hell, he couldn't even apologise properly. the words would lodge in his throat choking off his every attempt at a coherent apology. they stuck like drywall, refusing to fall from his lips. he felt so sick. so fucking, awfully, nauseatingly sick.

he had no one to blame but himself. for being lukewarm when it came to loving you. you deserved so much more than he could give you.

rin's teal eyes shot open in surprise as he heard the faint clicking of a key. he blinked owlishly at you, pinching himself to see if he was dreaming.

he wasn't. you were standing right in front of him holding the door open, wearing an oversized sweatshirt and basketball shorts. his sweatshirt. his shorts. he wanted to believe you were still his

"why are you here?" you asked, your eyes were glued to the floor as if the carpet was the most intriguing thing in the world

"i wanted to..." he trailed off then he tried again, "i wanted to talk"

"so talk then, as far as i'm concerned you have nothing to say" you said coldly. your words cut through him like shards of ice. he could feel your hurt, your anger prickling his soul

"can i come in?" he knew he was asking for too much, "please"

much to his surprise, you wordlessly opened the door wider and stepped aside for him to come in.

he didn't miss the way you tensed up as he passed you. nor did he miss the wary look that fleeted across your face. watching you tiptoe around him on egg shells twisted the shards further in his chest.

his fingers curled into fists as he followed you into your home. there was a heavy silence, drenched in unspoken words. he wanted to say something, anything. he wanted to tell you how sorry he was, how much he cared, that he still loved you. even though he had ruined everything between the two of you.

instead, he settled down on your couch, folding his arms over his lap. you sat down across the room, as far away from him as possible. you were staring resolutely out of the window, your fingers absentmindedly picking at the hem of your sweatshirt.

"are you even going to say anything?" you finally asked impatiently, "you owe me an apology rin"

"i know" he nodded, "it's just..." you could see the wheels spinning in his head, "my mind is blank, i don't know what to say" he looked at you pleadingly and your expression softened slightly

"just try" you coaxed, "take your time if you need to" he knew he didn't deserve your kindness. you should be hurling insults and profanities at him. he'd hidden away for three days. seventy-two whole and complete hours. yet you still had the patience of a saint

"i love you (y/n)," he blurted. the words left him like a bullet leaving a gun barrel. ricocheting in his mouth until he realized just what he'd said. it wasn't an apology. it was the only thing he knew

he doesn't want you to say it back. he doesn't deserve it. not yet. he wanted you to reassure him that the two of you would still be okay.

"i don't want to break up" he confessed, feeling utterly crushed by the weight of his words. vulnerability used to be a foreign concept to rin. now he was reduced to babbling like a pathetic, lost fool at the mercy of his feelings

"we can't continue this" you stated plainly.

"what do you mean?" he could feel his heart stopping. any second now, you'd tell him it was over. he hadn't ever felt so helpless. so hopeless. so scared before. he refused to meet your gaze. if he did he knew he would cry. rin never cried.

"this endless cycle is driving me crazy rin" you sighed, "one minute you love me and the next i mean nothing to you, just make up your mind"

"i'm sorry" he breathes, and it's merely a whisper, "for saying you meant nothing to me. it's not true, not even close. i need you. i really do. so much more than you know. i know i need to show it more, i'll do better, i'll be better, i promise. just please don't leave me...you're the best thing that's ever happened to me"

his words crashed together and were barely comprehensible .you didn't respond right away. you were processing it all, trying to process everything he'd said.

he heard the soft intake of your breath as your eyes watered. he didn't want to think you were on the verge of tears because of him. he couldn't tell if they were sad or happy tears..

you looked at him hesitantly, and after several moments, shuffled over to stand in front of him. you placed the back of your hand against his cheek. "you're freezing" you whispered, your soft tone was laced with concern. "it was cold outside" rin murmured, leaning into your touch despite the numbing guilt that radiated throughout his entire body. your thumb moved gently across the side of his face. your touch grounded him, it held him together.

your eyes were so warm. they shone like embers. his own eyes closed in relief as you leaned in closer, enveloping him completely in a hug. it took three painstakingly long days. seventy-two awful hours, but rin was back in your arms again, where he belonged.

he melted into you, drowning in the scent of ocha and honey. he clung to you as if he was scared to let go and his cold hands clutched at the warmth that radiated from your skin. he was so impossibly close you could feel his eyelashes fluttering against your cheeks.

rin watched your face for signs of lingering pain, but found none. your face was completely free of wrinkles and creases, your skin was smooth and unlined, untouched except by the light of the coffee table lamp dusting your cheeks. and your smile was the same, small and fragile but still sweet and beautiful

"we're......we're okay right?" he asked. he felt your lips ghost across his cheek in a tender kiss

"'course we are" you assured, carding your fingers softly through his tangled hair. you kissed him tenderly on the corner of his mouth. then the other. your kisses were feather light but filled with meaning. they spoke of forgiveness. he could taste it on your lips.

rin's arm encircled your waist and squeezed lightly as if he feared you might disappear if he let go. he pressed an unapologetic kiss to your lips. he kissed you as if he was trying to etch the shape of them, the shape of you, indelibly into his memory, to commit it to his heart forever. he didn't want to let go.

much to rin's displeasure, you pulled back and looked at him. really looked at him. his long lashes, his magnetic teal eyes, his freshly kissed lips and the faint blush tinting his cheeks. you looped your fingers through his before saying the words he so desperately wanted to hear

"i love you too rin, i'd never leave you"

© Y2KUROMI ‘23 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[n0tamused]

Heyyyy so im feeling evil and thinking of some sort of reader x blade x jingyuan where blade and reader like each other but jingyuan likes reader and it's this sad painful dramatic thing where jingyuan has to let reader be happy because happiness for her is with blade not with him

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾. A Haunted House‧₊˚𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ

A/n: I hope you like this you... youu!! (pointed finger at you emoji) Tbh I wish I could write concrete chapters for these things, but I don't hav the time.. Maybe one day I'll something long/multi-chapter. I love long angst and build up aaa

Content: Angst, Jing Yuan reminiscing about you, how he watched you and Blade grow closer together, remembering how he could never bring himself to stand between you and the person your heart called out for; unrequited love, no comfort

Words: 1490

Ko-Fi

Ages have come and gone with the turns of every amber era, each one feeling slower than the last and bringing by joys and sorrows uncounted. Jing Yuan had read too many words, tested his tongue with various titles and courtesies, yet the words he was attempting to read now tasted like ashes and looked like broken ripples. He found himself losing focus as of late, much more frequently and he could not blame the habit onto his usual sleepiness or the duty of a General that weighed across his shoulders. The papers before him were the reports of his fellow subordinates, Cloud Knights, about their recent investigation. He had read the same paragraph multiple times and found himself more disappointed than the last when the words did not seem to be written in his language. 

His thoughts were plagued by you. To anyone else in his shoes such a notion would bring shame to the General - this wise and old figure who has blooded his weapon and led his ship to prosperity, but he breaks at the notion of a missing warmth and imagined what-could-have-beens. But that small world of memories and dreams is all that was able to comfort him these days, it helped him wake up in the morning when it stabbed through his chest and prevented him from further sleep, all with a sad smile on his lip. What it could have been, if you had your heart for him and not Blade.

It was the late evening when he left the confines of the Seat of Divine Foresight, fresh air filling his lungs. The new assistant that was hired to tend his office greeted him on his way out and he bid her farewell with a gentle smile, although he could hardly call her new at this point, she had been around for almost a century, yet it made little difference to him. Little things meant little, they made him sad and made him lose sleep. Ever since the stellaron had been sealed away he could not stop thinking about the disaster. His mind’s eye drifted to the image of your face when he told you the news, always preferring to tell you these kinds of things in person. He told you to keep your guard up and remain close to your residence if you had no other pressing matters in terms of your work - but the image that floated forward more often than not was the way you left.

His easy smile traded places on his face for a look much more solemn when the roof of his residence loomed over his head, heavy and cold. 

“Hello, Mimi..” he bent down and extended his hand to the white feline as it came up to him, pushing its head against his hand in a strong greeting before making figure eights around and through his legs. At times like these, Jing Yuan felt as if this little creature alone harbored love towards him or took him into consideration, be it when she licked his face to wake him in the mornings or when she didn’t mind when he scratched her ears when she brought him a dead mouse as a trophy for him. A show off, this little one is. Sighing, he carefully stepped from her and took off his boots, placing them back into place.

Moving further inside he glimpsed the darkening sky outside, for a moment wondering if some of his more sensitive plants could use some more watering. He spots the low hanging leaves of the more dramatic sort of his plants. It was watered more than any other plant in his care, yet it curled its leaves and blooms in on itself, drooping from its clay pot, asking for another gallon of water.  

There are letters on the table, he had received them and read them that same morning. The letters themselves looked like they had gone through the disaster, with crumbled paper and torn edges, but Jing Yuan could recognize your handwriting anywhere, even in its most unshapely of forms. The envelopes are open neatly, yet torn at the edges where he couldn’t keep himself from ripping it open, his patience bending in the way of his gut-wrenching curiosity. Every step he takes towards the low table makes his feet feel heavy as lead, agonizing, slow, too heavy to bear, but the General has been through many trials, and none felt as painfully rewarding as this one.

In the corners of his eye he sees a different image than the dull walls of his empty home, he sees fragmented images of better days.

You’re sitting next to him and there are drinks on the table instead of letters. Blade- no, Yingxing is sitting across from you, lifting his cup of rice wine up into the air and towards yours. Baiheng is there too, exclaiming how they were going on with the toasts without her. There is one other, but Jing Yuan wishes not to remember. All hands join together making the porcelain cups clink and sing. 

Yingxing looked less gloomy, less reserved, he looked a century younger with the smile he wore on his face and the faint flush on his cheeks which he styled to perfection after a few drinks had settled in his gut, his eyes fixed on you. Your hands suddenly slap Jing Yuan on the shoulder, a playful act, it barely hurt but he swayed as if the impact had him reeling - you scolded him for not paying attention to you when you asked him something. What was it that you asked? A blessing? For what? Why his? There is a ring hanging on a necklace around that pretty neck of yours - only it wasn’t something he gifted you. Yingxing ,for once, used his skill for something other than weapons. He remembers your squeals of joy when you came over to show it to him. 

It was fine steel, an elegant band of rippling black across it, a red crystal on the top embraced by thorny ivy. It was a bold ring, a rather big ring, and the work of it showed that its master did not specialize in jewelry making - but that did not make it any less special or any less beautiful.

He remembers your joy more than the ring, your flushed cheeks and how you were nearly out of breath by the end of the conversation. Your face is fading, he realizes.

Yingxing is what he sees next in his mind’s eye in his later years, wrinkles decorating the corners of his eyes and the corners of his mouth, leaving permanent reminders of his joyous life. He asks Jing Yuan to relay something to you, a velvet box with a metal handle to clasp it shut through a loop. He wonders why he can’t give it to you himself, why task him with such a thing? But he doesn’t refuse. The memory doesn’t end there, but Jing Yuan can’t make himself remember more of it. The doubt, the hurt, the betrayal..

The mirage slips by like indents in the sand which the waves lap away. Another memory takes place. It is just you and him. There are words unspoken. You look older with the weariness in your eyes, and lean forward, resting your forehead against his shoulder, but you don’t seem to dare to press yourself any closer to him. This one is not a recent memory, and in hindsight Jing  Yuan wonders if you were trying to apologize to him then, in advance. Did you know things would turn out this way? Did you know he’d let you slip from his grasp like nothing ever existed between the two of you? He let you go, knowing you wouldn’t return to him, yet it hurt. You weren’t his. 

He deserved to know you were alright, he deserved to know the truth of it, deserved to be told not to hope - that’s what all those letters told him, what you said in woven careful words, and he can swear there are dried tear stains on the paper. Were those from you or from him?

“Keep her safe”, he whispered, frowning as the house around him grew gray. Lan, keep her safe. Blade - don’t you dare hurt her. It wasn’t a threat, it was a plea. 

He thought of sending you a response back, it was what kept him occupied the entire day besides his ghosts and your fading scent. Perhaps he shouldn’t - the letters would not reach you, and even if they did they would consist of his words telling you how he wished you all the best, wishing you safe travels through the stars - he could never will himself to hurt you, by words or actions. Sorrowful words would do him nothing, and they wouldn’t return you to him either. 

Jing Yuan decides to not write anything back. 

“(Y/n).. Stay safe. Stay happy..”

Dividers at the top: heavenlayt

Ⓒ n0tamused. Do not repost, translate, edit, and/or copy any of my works. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.

[starlixers]

calling for requests...⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

♫ if you’re not of legal age, stay off my page!

hey cuties! mimi here ♡

im opening up my requests for JJK for a little while! they will be passively done meaning: i'll get to it when i get to it (>ᴗ•) !

lineup: gojo ୨ৎ geto ୨ৎ sukuna ୨ৎ toji ୨ৎ nanami ୨ৎ ino ୨ৎ choso ୨ৎ shiu

what do i write?

nsf/w ⭑𓂃 no first years or anyone not an adult!

yandere

fluff

angst

headcanons

gen neutral and afab reader

darker themes ⭑𓂃 (ex. dubcon, fearplay, depression, etc.)

what don't i write?

anything fecal

age/play

noncon

knife/play

unnecessary g/0re

anything not on the no-no list, I’m probably okay with :) send me your best, I’ll give it a try!!

thank you ♡ — star/mimi

[lightsoutletsgo]

mimi's 500 celebration: request a ship!

first of all, thank you so so much for 500 followers! I decided that I did wanna do a little something to celebrate because I genuinely didn't expect to hit 500 🫣

I'm so thankful that each of you is here and so I wanted to give something back to you! I've decided that I wanna try a little shipping thing. I've seen a lot of other fandoms do this and I find it fun to do with moots in dm's so I thought I'd open in up to requests! happy requesting! love mimi ₊˚❀.ೃ࿔*:･

what you get: send in an ask and I'll ship you with the driver(s) I think fit the most! I'll explain my reasonings and write a little drabble about a cute moment to go with the ship!

if you would like to take part: ⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ send in an ask with a bit about you! - if you're not sure what kind of information to include then feel free to use any of the prompts below!

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ you can send as much or as little information as you want (obviously the more info you include the more detail I can do into!)

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ you can ask for up to 3 options (please specify how many ships you would like in your ask) the more options you ask for the shorter the drabbles

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ you do not have to include information about appearance! I mainly base my ships on personality, hobbies and interests anyway

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ if you would like an extra few spicy nsfw points then please specify that in your request

ᯓ⭒ IF YOU'RE SENDING AN ANONYMOUS ASK THEN PLEASE USE AN EMOJI SO I CAN TAG IT CORRECTLY! .ᐟ

prompts: 𓂃₊ ⊹ favourite genre of music/favourite artist/favourite song?

𓂃₊ ⊹ dream holiday destination?

𓂃₊ ⊹ the kind of job you have or the subject you're studying?

𓂃₊ ⊹ favourite food/favourite dessert/favourite drink?

𓂃₊ ⊹ dream date?

𓂃₊ ⊹ stay in or go out?

𓂃₊ ⊹ personality/how would others describe you?

𓂃₊ ⊹ things you look for in a partner?

࣪ ˖˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚.ೃ࿔*:･࣪ ˖˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚.ೃ࿔*:･࣪ ˖˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚.ೃ࿔*:･࣪ ˖˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚.ೃ࿔*:･

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ 𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗘 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧 𝗜𝗦 : satoru gojo x reader

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 synopsis: you have no choice but to believe he'll always come back to you. after all, home is where the heart is

contents:JJK SPOILERS CH236! angst, fluff kinda comfort. profanities. second & third person pov.character death. ( i despise you gege you ruined christmas eve ) wc: 1.8k

satoru gojo was an enigma. you knew that from the moment you met him. on first glance, there was nothing ordinary about him. his vivid blue eyes could simply not go unnoticed.

his smile, and that irritating laugh he shared too often were your kryptonite. you despised how soft you felt in response to his smile. his name alone could inspire the most extraordinary of emotions.

you had fallen hard for him. you'd fallen so irreversibly hard for him that you couldn't even find it in yourself to be mad at him when he called you out of the blue.

being with gojo meant expecting the unexpected. being with gojo meant believing he would come back after disappearing for days, weeks and occasionally months on end, without offering so much as an explanation

the call came whilst you were nose deep in christmas preparations. the kitchen in your shared home smelled of sugar, cinnamon and cloves.

the rest of the house had already been decorated for the holidays. there was tinsel everywhere. reds, whites and greens were splashed all over the place and christmas was only a few hours away

“you’re getting ready for santa?” satoru asks, upon hearing the whirring of the teal kitchenaid mixer he bought you for your birthday. “what about me?”

“you are santa silly” you laugh, switching off the mixer to hear your fiance’s voice clearer

“that i am” he smiled, flicking at the drops of blood adorning his lips with his tongue, “what are you cooking up tonight? ‘m starving”

“i thought we were going out for dinner..” you murmur, confusion evident in your words, “did you forget again ‘toru?”

“no baby. ‘course not” he says, pausing momentarily to wipe off the excess blood, “just something came up at work. i'll make it up to you”

“well the cookies should be done in a bit” you said, and he could hear you smiling. “extra chocolate , just the way you like it”

“mmm” he hummed, blood ringing in his ears, “can’t wait to try them”

“when are you coming home?”

your question is met with silence on the other end of the phone, and satoru has to admit he can tell by the lack of noise on your part that you've grown concerned.

the last thing he wants right now is for you to cry because of him. so he lies to you. it's all he could do. he couldn't tell you that he, the strongest jujutsu sorcerer, was reduced to a bleeding mess at the hands of sukuna. the notion shouldn't even be plausible

yet here he was, leaving his allies to do all the work, while he choked back heart wrenching sobs. he should try to stop the bleeding. try to stay conscious but there was too much. too much blood

“toru” you breathed, sounding completely broken. your voice was barely a whisper, but it was all he could focus on, blurring out the massacre taking place behind him. “what’s happening?”

he couldn’t tell you. his throat felt dry and hollow. his hand twitched in pain as he reached towards his bleeding abdomen. fingers sticky with dark blood

he didn't know. everything had been fine a while ago. it almost seemed like he would win. but satoru gojo was faced with a fatal curse. he could never win.

“nothing too serious my love” he fibbed, the lie dripping off his tongue like honey.

“bullshit” you frowned, “i can hear you wheezing gojo. don’t lie to me”

"you’ve always been too smart for your own good" he laughs, the motion rendering him breathless.

he hears your breath hitch and he can feel his heart shattering. he really shouldn’t have called you. he just wanted to hear your voice one last time

“switch to video” you ordered, after a painstaking moment of silence, before adding softly, “i want to see you”

“you really don’t” he says teasingly, trying his absolute hardest to make light of the situation, “i’m really roughed up right now, ‘m scared you won’t think i’m pretty anymore”

“satoru” you said through gritted teeth

“‘m half the man i used to be” he jokes weakly. satoru was a stubborn bastard, yes. but he also cared more about you than anything else. and he knew seeing him like this would scar you for life.

“stop stalling” you pleaded, "we've talked about this"

"don't wanna do this to you" he slurs, squeezing his beautiful blue eyes shut

“i’ll hang up i swear” you say, and he knows you mean it. the thought of no longer hearing your sweet voice hurts more than his pending death

“please don’t” he said, “don’t wanna be alone right now”

you can feel the vulnerability he carries reverberating in his voice. you can hear him panicking.

loneliness is something satoru gojo had grown to despise. but it clung to him endlessly. it came with the weight of the jujutsu world hanging on him — the first sorcerer in four hundred years to have the six eyes and limitless .

he could be touched only when he wished to be. choosing to keep others safe from the burden he had to carry at an unfairly young age simply because he inherited these abilities.

it was painstakingly hard for him to connect with people after losing geto, a void was left in his absence. a void he didn’t bother to fill until you came along

he tended to hide his true desires and feelings behind his cheerful and charismatic personality, but that didn’t work with you. you saw right through him

“okay” you nodded, blinking back the tears that prickled your eyelids, “how bad is it?”

“really fucking bad” he says weakly, “can’t hold out much longer”

if you could you would hug him, or do anything to make him feel better. but you couldn't. he was alone. you wished you could see his face, you wanted to kill him for doing this to you. for leaving you when he promised to stay by your side forever

“you're not going to die on me" you said as firmly as you could manage, “you can’t”

"promise me, you’ll be alright " he said, trying not to grimace as the effort he put into speaking left him weaker than before, "i want you to move on, just because my life ends doesn't mean yours has to”

"don’t say shit like that" you said, fresh tears brimming in your eyes. he was glad he’d decided to stick to audio call. seeing you cry would surely finish him off

“promise me" he pleaded, he could feel his body suddenly growing colder, his bottom lip quivered furiously

"i promise" those words were heavy on your tongue. believing you could move on from satoru was quite literally stupid, you didn't want anyone but him, you didn't need anything, need anyone, as long as you had him with you.

“it really s-sucks that ‘m gonna — s-shit — die alone” he says, his bloody lips trembling “i love you so much (y/n)"

no. no. no. you couldn’t allow this to happen

“keep your eyes open for me toru please" you said frantically, but you knew you were losing him. you were still crying, even though your eyes felt sore and dried out.

“say it back” he whimpered, “need to hear you say it”

"i love you too toru” tears stream down your face, stinging your cheeks as your heart shatters into a million pieces

“i know” he says, smiling to himself despite the pain. it was everywhere all at once. he didn't have the strength to fight it anymore, allowing the cold feeling to wrap itself around him, completely burying him.

“toru?” you whisper timidly. you’re met with numbing silence. stillness, tranquility. you wanted to lash out, you wanted to make everyone hurt the way you were hurting.

you felt unabashedly raw, like a vital part of your body had been ripped away. and then you realised it was something that belonged wholly to him. your heart. he owned your heart, he always would.

you couldn’t stop the loud, unfiltered sobs that fled from the confines of your chest. you wanted to scream until you could taste blood. you were shaking now. you couldn’t breathe. you couldn’t-

“(y/n)!!” you felt arms around you shocking you back to reality. your eyes shot open, locking with gojo’s ethereal blue pupils. concern evident in his face as he tenderly wiped your tears away

you looked around the dimly lit room, turning your head frantically, (e/c) eyes grief stricken and wide with fear “

"it's okay baby, i'm here" satoru said softly, slipping your fingers through his. you grabbed onto him as if he was a lifeline, squeezing his fingers so hard you were sure no blood was rushing to them.

“you’re alive” you said slowly, struggling to see through your tears, you needed some form of confirmation, anything, to let you know that you just had a bad dream, a silly nightmare that wouldn't come to fruition

“‘course i’m alive” he laughs "it was just a dream baby"" he placed kisses on the smooth canvas of your visage, not caring that your face was tear stained

“he killed you.” you sobbed, “and you called me-”

“who?” he interrupts, feigning offence at the mere prospect of someone beating him, the gojo satoru, the undeniable strongest

“sukuna” you murmur, “he looked like megumi for some reason but it was him”

“sukuna?” he frowns, “as if! sounds like a really silly dream my love. but you can talk about it when you're ready"

in the solace of his arms, you quietly tried to regain your sanity, tried to put yourself back together. he whispered sweet nothings to you,gently threading his fingers through your hair. patting your head affectionately—his love language— for once you didn't want him to stop, that small movement helped you clear your head.

you felt so weak, so vulnerable, so exposed. you knew that loving someone, loving gojo, would make you feel things you’d never felt before. you’d never been so scared, never been so happy, never felt so complete all at once

“was it that bad?” gojo asked, his curiosity getting the best of him, “you’ve never been this shaken up before”

“it was really fucking bad” you say, almost laughing because you sounded just like him

he was frowning at how absurd the sound of him dying was. he traced a finger over your hips, ghosting shapes on your warm skin. a cirlce, a triangle, a heart. "i love you y’know. i’m not dying any time soon”

you wanted to believe him so bad, you wanted to be certain. but you were holding on to the fear that your dream would one day become reality “promise me?”

he stuck out his pinkie childishly, looping it with yours. “i pinkie promise”

a small smile makes its way across your face. gojo never broke his promises. they were golden, the surest thing in the universe

“do you think you’d ever lose to sukuna?” you ask, after a sweet moment of silence. you peer at your other half with curious eyes and your heart flutters at the cocky grin on his face

“nah, i’d win”

© Y2KUROMI '23 . please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

✶ : ❛ [𝟬𝟮:𝟯𝟲 𝗔𝗠] : seishiro nagi x reader ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

˖ ִֶָ𐀔 contents ⋮ fluff, bit of angst (if you squint!) , gn! reader, pining. second person (you/your/yours) and third person pov. wc: 0.88k

(y/n) : ‘you up?’

the text lit up nagi's phone screen and made a loud  echo through the speaker. your contact name made him want to grab the phone immediately. despite being in the middle of a fortnite round with his friends. after muting himself and taking his headphones off, seishiro opened up your message. as nonchalantly as he could muster, he typed back.

‘yh, you ok?’

he noticed the time. almost three in the morning. if you were texting him this late on a school night, something must be keeping you awake. he went back to playing fortnite on his computer, but his grey eyes often flickered back to his phone. he couldn't focus on the game anymore, he just wished you'd reply faster

as the words victory royale flashed across his screen, he saw his phone light up.

(y/n) : i’m good just had a nightmare

he didn't know what to do. he didn't know what to say. he wasn't particularly good with words. so he called you. it happened almost automatically. as if his body was on auto pilot. he only realised what he'd done when the obnoxious ringing filled his ears

you picked up on the second ring. soft (e/c) eyes peering at him over your (f/c) sheets.

"hey" you said quietly. your eyes were puffy as if you'd been crying for hours. but you still looked so beautiful

"yo" he said back, yo??? really??? . he cursed himself inwardly. he really didn't think that through. he typically preferred not to think at all but these days all he thought about was you.

"what game are you playing?" you asked. your question made sense, seeing as he was sitting in his gaming chair. reo had picked it out for him as a birthday present.

"fortnite" he yawned, "might be done for the night"

"are you sure?" you asked, furrowing your brows, "you don't have to stop playing to talk to me, i'm alright, i promise" his heart hammered in his chest. 

he wanted to tell you that you were far more important than any game. he wanted to tell you that you were more important than his soccer games. he wanted to tell you that he would drop anything and anyone just to be with you, but all that came out of his mouth was a weak "'s alright".

you nodded meekly. visibly still shaken up by your nightmare. he wondered what it was about. what could possibly make you this scared? you were the coolest person he knew

"what'd you dream about?" he asked as he disconnected from vc and shut down his gaming system. he hoped it was something he could fix. the thought of you suffering was too much for him to bear

"sad stuff" you grimaced. you shut your eyes tightly as if you were squeezing every last drop of weakness from your being. nagi wished you would open up to him. he wouldn't know what to say, but he wanted to listen. he just wanted to be there for you.

"d'you wanna talk about it?"

"no..not really" you sighed, "it's a lot.."

"don't mind" he said, stifling a yawn, "spit it out"

"it's embarrassing!" you spluttered, averting your gaze.

a frown pulled at his lips. he was always there when you needed him. he'd take on all the pain that you were going through in those dreams without hesitation.

"don't care" he pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. your face heated up at the sight, he didn't know how cute he was.

"choki wants t'know too" the grey-eyed boy pulled the cactus into frame. you giggled at him, your laughter lighting up his entire world

"fine!" you conceded, allowing the wall you'd built up to come tumbling down, "i dreamt about my ex again"

"again?" he spluttered, jealousy clouding his expression

"i can't help it" you sighed, "he really hurt me and i can't stop thinking that it's my fault. maybe something's wrong with me and-"

"'s not true" he cut you off, "you deserved better" 'and i'm the best' he wanted to say. the words caught in his throat but he wasn't selfish enough to say them

"thank you sei" you said softly, he didn't need to say much to reassure you. he simply understood you

"'s not big deal" he shrugged, a faint rosy dust coating his cheeks. maybe if you weren't feeling so tired you would have noticed. you were content with settling into comfortable silence, growing sleepier by the second

nagi wished you would reciprocate the massive crush he had on you, just so he could finally do something about it.

if he liked anyone else he would've grown impatient and blurted out a confession already. he abhorred waiting around. but your friendship was everything to him

you stifled a yawn, eyes watering with the precipice of sleep. "night sei," you said, sleep lacing your voice. your eyes were half-lidded as you gazed at your best friend

"night" he said, bringing his cute pet cactus back into frame, "say g'night to choki too"

"night, choki" you mumbled, shutting your eyes. nagi was relieved to see your face relax. you must have felt much better now. his heart filled with warmth at the notion of bringing you happiness

he tried not to miss hearing your voice when the call finally ended. he tried not to feel even more alone in the vast emptiness of his room. he tried to stop thinking about you. but he couldn't

seishiro nagi was irreversibly love sick

© Y2KUROMI 23 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

✶ : ❛ 𝗦𝗢𝗠𝗘𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗥𝗢𝗡𝗚𝗘𝗥 : seishiro nagi x reader

˖ ִֶָ𐀔 contents ⋮ fluff. cw! mentions of alcohol. est rel. second person and third person pov. birthday fic cs i miss my loser

nagi was no stranger to loneliness, rather he found it comfortable and familiar because he strongly believed people and parties were bothersome.

he was quite sure he was allergic to parties. they were loud, overcrowded and he could think of countless other ways to spend his birthday— playing valorant ranked, binge reading manga or better yet sleeping. alone.

that's how he’d always spent his birthday. he was free to do whatever he wanted and the presents his parents sent in the mail made up for their lack of presence. the sixth of may had always been just another day to him.

this year it was a day he wanted to spend with you.

he had to some degree, you’d let yourself into his apartment relatively early with intricately piped lemon cupcakes and a new controller for his playstation before reo dragged him off to keep him out of your way.

the small party you’d thrown left his apartment undeniably altered. to be frank, not much had changed. it was as messy as ever — with sparkly confetti adorning the floorboards and the bottles of soju cluttering the coffee table — but it felt less lonely, he felt less lonely

after he’d gotten over the initial shock of being showered with confetti and having his apartment filled with his friends, a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips and his eyes shone brighter than the stars themselves.

the starry-eyed look he sent you as reo and isagi whisked him away for celebratory shots is filled with the purest form or love. it’s unwavering, and stronger than the lemon flavoured soju they sipped for hours.

it’s stronger than the frown that tugged at barou’s lips as he herded his intoxicated teammates outside and it’s stronger than the hangovers that would follow consequently in the morning.

seishiro’s apartment is empty now, save for the two of you curled up on the sofa. he seems to melt into you as your fingers comb through the messy mop of white hair against your thigh.

he’s never felt more comfortable than he is now with his head on your lap as he taps at the fps game he’s playing on his phone. his gray eyes are fixed on you as he clears the stage and a cutscene fills his screen.

he doesn’t think he’s ever put his phone down faster. the cushions on the sofa dip as he props himself up on his elbows, leaning forward to close the space between you.

“headshot” he hums, pressing his lips languidly to your temple.

you laugh — it's pretty, comfortable and you look absolutely breath-taking doing it. his heavy lidded gaze falls to your lips and he doesn’t hesitate to press a lazy kiss to the corner of your mouth. seishiro always seems to melt when he kisses you

he wasn't the type of boyfriend who would publicly whirl you around and kiss you breathless in front of a crowd — though he would always find you in one — he was still a little clumsy and awkward when it came to love but it was starting to become as easy as breathing.

he blinks at you sleepily, undeniably kiss drunk, and far more intoxicated by the sweet scent of your perfume than the blur of lemon soju lingering on his lips as he pulls away.

“thanks for throwing me a party” he murmurs — a low drawl that reverberates against your skin and fills the space between you.

“glad you liked it, sei” you smile, in a way that’s so soft it makes him want to lean in and kiss you again. he finds he’s too tired and settles for laying his head down on your lap again.

he could care less about the blinking ‘you lose’ screen on his discarded phone as he feels your fingers continue their ministrations on his scalp

it’s adorable, the way he’s fighting to keep his eyes open — letting them drift closed ever so slightly when your thumb brushes softly against his cheek. he basks in the warmth you radiate before you slowly attempt to peel yourself off the sofa

“where you going?” he murmurs drowsily, gray doe-eyes blinking owlishly at you. his brows are furrowed slightly and his lips tug together in a makeshift pout

“home” you sigh, “it’s pretty late, i should probably head out soon” you can't help the laughter spilling from your lips at the quiet, sleepy protests that leave his pouty lips.

"stay the night" he frowns, tracing messy, wobbly hearts on the bone of your encased wrist. “ts still my birthday, you can’t leave me yet”

his eyes shine with a silent plea and he gazes up at you from your lap with warmth that rivals the sun when its rays kiss your shoulders. it’s convincing — enough that you find yourself softening and sinking back into the sofa.

“okay, i’ll stay” you say quietly. seishiro sighs when your fingers comb through his hair again and you know it’s less because he’s well past tired and more because as far as birthdays went, this is the best he’d ever had.

© Y2KUROMI 2024. please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

✶ : ❛ 𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧 𝗟𝗢𝗧𝗨𝗦 : seishiro nagi x reader ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

˖ ִֶָ𐀔 — contents ⋮ birthday fic for moi <3 fluff, fluff, fluff, fem! reader, established relationship, nagi is literally whipped. reo being a d1 hater. pet names . second person (you/your/yours) and third person pov. w/c : 2.4k

if you told nagi he'd be sitting cross-legged in his kitchen picking thorns off pink roses and counting them under his breath while his best friend reo talked him through this (or at least attempted to), he would've laughed in your face. even more so if you'd told him his cheeks were flushed a shade darker than the soft petals he clutched and his heart hammered loudly in his chest. but here he was doing just that hours to your birthday

"what do you think?" nagi asked reo, bringing the bouquet into view. he was quite proud of the floral arrangement of roses, chrysanthemum, lotus and hydrangea flowers. "’s it too much?"

"it's pretty lame, why don't you just cover (y/n)'s apartment in rose petals instead" reo suggested, he was only kidding

"you just want to see me suffer" nagi grumbled. when he'd facetimed him for moral support, he hadn't expected him to crack jokes at his expense, "cleaning that up would be such a hassle"

"i'm surprised you made the bouquet yourself," reo said thoughtfully, "wouldn't ordering one be more your speed?"

"nahh" the grey-eyed boy shook his head, "(y/n) likes these specific flowers for some reason, florist didn't have any arrangements like this"

"so you just bought four bouquets....? you do know custom orders exist right?" there's a small smirk on reo's lips as he teased. nagi shot him a withering glare as he firmly tied the stems together with twine

"wouldn't be as special that way" nagi muttered. he was blushing again, despite being in the comfort of his own home, he could feel the blush still warming his neck and ears

"you really love her, huh?" reo questioned gently his eyes softening when he saw nagi shyly smile at him

"yeah..." nagi breathed out quietly, smiling softly down at the flower arrangement, "should i bake a cake?"

"what??"

"'ve got this heart-shaped pan, and i bought cake mix and some other stuff after training today. i think i could pull it off”

“are you sure about that?” reo queried, “i’m not gonna help you”

“that’s fine, not like you can bake anyways,” nagi scoffed, setting the flowers down on the counter. “it shouldn’t be that hard right?”

“depends on the flavour” reo affirmed

“what should i do for icing, buttercream?” nagi asked, picking up a bag of sugar and a tub of butter. “’s the easiest”

“buttercream then”

“i wasn’t really asking you, but sure”

“dumbass”

“(y/n)’s dumbass” he grinned, his voice softening at the mention of your name “god i hope she likes this. i feel like i could’ve done more”

“you made her a bouquet, you made her a gift basket and now you’re baking her a cake. you didn’t even get me anything for my birthday” reo said pointedly

“you’re not my girlfriend reo, and you can buy stuff for yourself”

“you’re a terrible friend”

��i’m a good boyfriend though” nagi said softly, “the best in the world”

reo couldn’t argue with that. nagi only put effort in the things he deemed important. you stood at the top of that list, above soccer, gaming and sleeping. he wanted nothing more than to make you happy.

to his credit, he tried his best. he went grocery shopping whenever you asked him to pick up groceries. he made sure you ate enough, and he always made time for you. even if he wanted to spend his entire day playing video games, he still made sure he was by your side.

he would do anything for you. hell, if you asked him to do a handstand and sing baby shark backwards, as stupid as it sounded, he would do it just to see your heartbreakingly beautiful smile

“‘m gonna make (y/n) breakfast in bed” he murmured, he could already see the smile stretching across your face “french toast or pancakes, dunno yet”

“you? cook?” reo laughed, “you’re gonna poison her”

“shut up” nagi scowled, his nose scrunching up in mock annoyance, “i know how to cook, ‘s just a hassle but if it’s for (y/n) i don’t mind” he said as he mixed the dry ingredients until the salt, sugar and cake mix were evenly combined. he cracked two large eggs into the bowl and poured in milk, oil and vanilla extract. the cake mix reminded him oddly of you. sweet and sugary

“you’re whipped” reo said. “you’re too far gone,look at your face all mushy like that you’re making me sick”

“‘s called being in love, not that you can relate” nagi retorted. he gently scooped the batter in the baking pan with a spatula while reo stared at him agape. “‘s obvious” he shrugged, slipping the pan into the pre-heated oven.he ran a hand through his hair as he leaned against the counter with a content look on his face

nagi was still learning what love really was. to him, it looked a lot like you.

loving you felt like breathing, like waking up in the morning after a good night’s sleep. he loved your smiles, your laugh, the sparkle you got in your eyes when you were around him. he loved everything about you. he’d probably never love anyone the way he loved you. and he was okay with that, he wouldn’t trade you for the world

“simp” reo said “ i’m surprised she puts up with your lazy ass”

“you call this moral support?” nagi muttered, “should’ve called someone else”

“who else would sit on facetime with you while you did all this?” reo asked, “i’ll wait”

nagi was deep in thought for a moment but he remained silent. he knew you would, but that would inherently ruin the surprise

"so, nobody, huh? thought as much," reo remarked, rolling his eyes, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. it was a breath of fresh air to not be the one pushing nagi to do something for once

*ding* nagi’s eyes lit up as the timer chimed. the kitchen was filled with the scent of freshly baked vanilla cake. he slipped on an oven mitt before he took the pan out of the oven and placed it on the island. his cheeks were flushed as he glanced over his shoulder to shoot him a triumphant look

“cake’s done” he was slightly giddy with anticipation, once he was done icing it he could finally drive to your apartment and see you. he knew you were already sleeping, he’d called you an hour ago and your voice had been laced with the precipice of sleep. he didn’t really care, he selfishly wanted to be the first to wish you a happy birthday. even if it meant waking you up at midnight

true to his word nagi slipped into your apartment as soon as the clock struck midnight. to his credit he was as quiet as possible. setting your presents down on the counter before sneaking into your room

the bed dips and suddenly there’s a warm body behind you. nagi wraps an arm around your waist, pressing himself closer to you. you let out a small noise as he pulls you in for a long kiss, his hand reaching up to stroke your cheek.

“sei…” you yawn, squinting at him with your sleepy (e/c) eyes. you’re unbelievably pretty he thinks. even with furrowed eyebrows and a worn-out look on your face. your lashes fan across your face and he can feel his heart melting

“happy birthday baby” he murmurs, placing the sweetest of kisses on your forehead.

“thank you” you hummed, resting your head on his chest, enjoying the warmth radiating from the blankets. “thought you weren’t coming till later…”

“couldn’t stay away” he admitted with a sigh, wrapping an arm around your waist, “‘m sorry i woke you”

“it’s okay” you smiled,you brush a few locks of his hair away from his forehead, leaning up slightly to peck his lips. you pulled back slightly content with blissfully reveling in his presence before you sat up properly, pulling back the covers and climbing out of your bed, “c’mon i want my presents now”

“what makes you think i got you anything?” he mutters. eager to stay cuddled up in bed. his hopes were dashed as you dragged him towards you

you wonder how someone could be as cute as he was, despite his hair being messed up more than ever and his eyelids heavy with sleep. you bring your free hand up to his cheek and smile. his hand comes up to hold yours as he nuzzles into your palm, soft grey eyes affectionate and loving, the everpresent pout no longer visible on his face.

“because you love me” you reply, smiling when he grins lazily at you, a little bit dazed

"i do love you," he mumbles, leaning up and slowly kissing the corner of your lips. “wait here” he tells you softly as he stands up, giving you another quick kiss. you watch him leave the room with a fond expression on your face.

your 6’3 boyfriend returns less than two minutes later, cradling a (f/c) box filled to the brim with your favourite snacks, manga and a fluffy miffy plush. as well as the prettiest bouquet of flowers you’d ever seen.

you practically tackle him, hugging him tightly as he laughs. you pull back to admire the flowers in his hands and you gasp, reaching out to take one of them.

“are those lotuses?” you ask, staring at them lovingly. they almost glow under the light in your bedroom

“yeah,” he nods, “you said you liked them”

you loved lotuses, although nagi didn’t understand why. the soft pink lotus flowers and their dreamy forgetfulness and symbolic unwillingness to leave reminded you distinctly of him

“they’re beautiful, thank you so much” you beam. you took the bouquet from him, eyes widening when you realized they weren’t store bought. tears pricked your (e/c) irises and you sniffle as you tried your best not to lose it.

“ hey!” he says, noticing the tearful expression on your face. he cups your face gently “don’t start bawling on me yet”

“you made this yourself?” you whisper, staring in awe at the bouquet, “for me?”

“do i have another girlfriend or something?” he says, raising a questioning eyebrow at you. you glare at him before laughing

“shut up, i love you” you say. you wrap your arms around his neck and give him a tight hug. or at least you try to, the box slightly gets in the way.

“i love you too” nagi smiles, and it’s one of those smiles he reserves for you, one that lights up his face and makes him shine brighter than any star, “now look at the rest, ‘m sorry i didn’t wrap anything”

“too much of a pain?” you asked, tilting your head to the side. he nodded in response, holding out the next gift. a sleek photo album. the first page is filled with a plethora of pictures. there were candid shots of you, pictures you didn’t even know existed. the one that stuck out to you the most was a picture of you at the arcade on your first date.

“you can fill up the rest yourself” nagi yawned, trailing towards your bed and placing the box carefully down on it. you placed the pink and purple bouquet on your dressing table before joining him

“thank you sei” you said, you honestly couldn’t say it enough. when nagi had asked you out a few months ago you’d never imagined he could possibly make you feel this special. hell, you didn’t even care about your birthday that much. you almost hated him now, he’d ruined your expectations for life by making you feel like this..

nagi’s grey eyes drooped as he leaned against your pillow, “s’nothing, there’s one more thing you’ve gotta see tonight” he lazily pointed at a white box tucked neatly beside the cinnamoroll plush with a striking resemblance to nagi

you opened the box gingerly, the sweet scent of buttercream filled your senses. “a cake?” you exclaimed, “sei, you baked?? you baked me a cake??”

“i baked” nagi shrugged, “’s just a small one, and ‘s not from scratch”

you dipped your finger into the buttercream and licked the sweet (f/c) frosting off, “this is really good,” you tell him

“‘m just good at everything” he murmurs, grinning when you gave him an exasperated glance “‘m glad you like it”

“of course i do” you frowned slightly, “sit up for just a second, you gotta sing while i blow out my candles”

“‘m not singing”

“pleaseeeeee” you pleaded, “it doesn’t even have to be the full song, you owe me sei, since you woke me up”

“fine” he sighed, sitting up reluctantly. he watched patiently as you placed the candles in the centre of the cake and pressed the flame to the wax. once the candles were lit, you reached over and grabbed his hand.

he thought you looked really beautiful like this, with the candlelight casting your features in warm glow and your hair fanned out over your shoulders. you seemed ethereal. he stared at you and smiled softly, watching as the flickering light danced on your face, casting shadows onto your (e/c) eyes

“i don’t hear you singing” you said, giggling when his cheeks flushed a startling shade of pink.

“shut up” he huffed, looking away, but you only grinned wider as he sang for you. you didn’t know why he didn’t want to in the first place, he sounded like an angel. after the song was finished, you blew out your candles gently

you wished for a plethora of things all of which you knew nagi would stop at nothing to give you. you felt like he’d given you the entire world already. so you wished you could give him endless happiness. you wished you could spend day after day falling further in love with him, and you wished you could give him the entire universe

after the cake had been kept safely in the fridge and your breathtaking flowers arranged in a vase, you placed a lone lotus flower on your bedside table, nimbly slipping under the sheets beside your sweet boyfriend

“what did you wish for?” he asks, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as he kissed the top of your head

“my wish won’t come true if i tell you” you hummed.

“‘s not fair” he pouted, “i told you what i wished for on my birthday”

“if i kiss you will you shut up and go to sleep ?” you asked. nagi nodded meekly. you didn’t need to ask him twice. he’d do anything for you

© Y2KUROMI ‘23 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 LOVE LETTERS ?! O2: stars aligned,

synopsis: love is a foreign concept, often hard to express in words. except your feelings poured into the sweetest letters, intended for your eyes only. when the saccharine envelopes are mailed out to the five boys you've loved sparks fly, hearts break and chaos ensues. "heavily inspired by tatbilb"

𝖎. series: seishiro nagi x f! reader (she/they) | wc: 7.0k | contents : fake dating trope. kinda? forced proximity. toxic/fake friends, heavy pining. second person (you/your/yours) swearing in italics.

𝖎𝖎. notes: pretend it’s been two days and not two months since i updated this… so sorry wth

⇆ series masterlist prev: parallel lines next: call me baby

MONDAY,

. . . ❀ the weekend dragged on in a hazy blur of ignoring texts and staying curled up in the confines of your bed watching old shoujos, but you couldn’t forget your current predicament.

it felt like a recurring nightmare. and you half wished it was. but it was real. the sick feeling in your stomach. the constant buzzing of your phone. and rensuke kunigami standing outside your house.

your hands faltered, your spoon filled with cereal suspended in the air. the eerie sound of milk dripping off the metal echoed in the kitchen

he was outside your house. of course he was. the two of you always walked to school together. your spoon clattered into your bowl, splashing white droplets onto the kitchen counter

“should i let him in?” your mom asked, the scent of her warm lavender body mist filled the kitchen with a false sense of hope

“no!” you shook your head fervently, “i can’t talk to him mom, i don’t even want to go to school today.”

“you can’t avoid him forever” she sighed, “i told you i didn’t like that kiyomi girl constantly sleeping over, now look what’s happened”

you groaned, pushing your half eaten bowl of cereal away from you. “can you just get him to leave — please?”

your mom exhaled loudly, but she set her phone on the counter and drifted out of the kitchen. you could faintly hear the door opening in the distance and muffled dialogue between them. she returned shortly, with her lips pressed in a thin line and her arms folded across her chest.

you glanced at your phone, watching a notification from kunigami pop up on your lockcreen. you felt awful. you could vividly picture the dejected look fleeting across his face when your mom lied to him

+ 1 new message from: ren you went to school without me?

“you have to sort this mess out” your mom said, shaking her head, “kunigami’s a good kid, don’t throw away your friendship over something so fickle”

“‘s not that easy mom” you frowned, pushing yourself off the stool and smoothing your neatly ironed skirt down, “but i’ll try”

“what are you going to do about meguru and that kid you used to be close with?” she asked, raising a brow as you slung your school bag over your shoulder

you had been ignoring bachira's texts as well, you knew deep down he didn’t deserve it. he'd been really sweet about everything , even going as far as to offer to send his letter back to you. but you couldn't bring yourself to respond.

“who, nagi?” you asked, tilting your head to the side, she hummed in response. “i’ll avoid him too. it shouldn’t be hard, i doubt he’ll go out of his way to talk to me”

"are you sure about that?" she queried, "his letter was pretty intense"

"yeah i'm sure- wait." you narrowed your eyes, "did you read my letters mom?"

"they were cute" she smiled warmly, "you really should get better at hiding things, not that it matters now,"

"thanks" you said through gritted teeth, turning on your heel and making your way towards the front door "i'll be home late, i have to work extra hours to cover my shifts"

"have a good day at school" she called, "or at least try to!"

. . . ❀ you slumped against your desk dejectedly . having a double period of economics first thing in the morning after a subpar weekend seemed like a 'gift' from the devil himself. a gift that went unappreciated, you had suffered enough

it had its silver lining, kunigami wasn't in any of your morning classes. nagi and kiyomi, on the other hand were in some of the classes you had lined up throughout the day. kiyomi rarely attended physical education and you would simply sit beside reo in geography. nagi tended to skip physical education to play video games, he’d be asleep in history too — so that wasn’t a problem.

you heard the scraping sound of the chair beside you being pulled backwards, (e/c) eyes landing on reo mikage. he looked as good as ever, his hair slightly damp from his shower after soccer training and the everpresent scent of his woodsy perfume engulfing him in a soft cloud.

"your hair's wet mikage" you said languidly, your head resting in the cavern of your arms.

"reo" he sighed, sitting down beside you, "and good morning to you too" he was smiling now, the smile that had all the girls at hakuho falling to their knees. except you.

"morning" you hummed, eyes darting around the classroom as the rest of your classmates streamed in.

"you did amazing on friday" reo said, trying to make conversation. you raised a brow. would nagi have told him about the letters? was reo mikage about to congratulate you for being good at writing cringy love letters?

"the semi finals" he added, raking a hand through his lightly dripping hair. you let out a nervous laugh "you guys are really good"

"thanks mikage" you smiled, a soft genuine one that made your eyes sparkle . reo thought you were the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. he couldn't fathom why nagi had chosen sora over you in the first place.

"reo" he said, "c'mon just once? everyone calls me reo"

"it's a good thing i'm not everyone then" you said, stretching and leaning back in your seat. you'd been friends with reo since you were fourteen. three years of banter, three years of him secretly pining after you

"can't argue with that" he murmured, averting his warm violet gaze. he half wished he'd received that letter instead of nagi. nagi didn't deserve you. he did

he was the one who'd found the letter in the first place. nagi was too lazy to check his mail. he said it was too much of a hassle, reo had been sifting through bills and soccer academy envelopes when his fingers grazed the faded yellow envelope

he wanted to talk to you about it. he wanted to tell you that you didn't deserve to be a second choice, he wanted to tell you he understood how you'd felt. but he'd be lying then because he wasn't even a choice at all

you gazed out the window absentmindedly, completely oblivious to the whirlwind of emotions storming through reo's mind. you breezed through the case study assigned after mr. ikida finished teaching. sketching graphs and writing detailed evaluations

his notebook remained blank, he wanted to blame it on being exhausted from morning training, but he knew deep down that the reason he couldn't think about production possibility curves, or demand and supply was due to his surplus feelings for you

"i'm assigning you pair projects for your continuous assessments, a powerpoint presentation analysing the effects of demand and supply in terms of economic growth." mr ikida announced

collective groans and complaints echoed in the classroom and his lip curled into a frown.

"you can pick your own partners" he added, "at your own risk, the presentation is due in two weeks"

you nudged reo with your elbow, pulling him from his thoughts "wanna do the project together?"

"do you even have to ask?" he asks, his violet eyes twinkling. you rolled your eyes.

"you weren't even paying attention" you scoffed, scooping your notebooks into your arms. the bell rang shrilly and your chair scraped backwards as you stood up, "see you in pe mikage"

"reo" he corrected, shaking his head fondly, "see you (y/n)"

. . . ❀ the sun hung lowly in the sky and the faint gusts of breeze enveloped you as you ran effortlessly. you were literally and figuratively running away from your problems

your teammates had noticed the tension between you and kiyomi, —you couldn't blame them, you could cut it with a knife — and you decided to bask in solitude. charging ahead of them, floating through the wind on a trajectory

until your serenity came crashing down chaotically. in mere seconds you were sprawled on your hands and knees on the track. your eyes flickered around the burnt orange expanse, searching for the source of your fall and you found it

seishiro nagi. his leg tangled beneath yours and his head blocking out the sun. the glowing rays highlighted his snowy curls in a way that resembled a halo. ironic, because nagi was no angel. they called him the devil's child for a reason

“are you actually insane?” you spat, shooting the snowy-haired boy a glare. your hands grazed the track roughly and you could feel bruises forming on your knees “like genuinely?”

“nah” he says, shaking his head firmly. “you’re the crazy one”

“excuse me?” you inhaled sharply, eyes widening in disbelief. only seishiro nagi could trip you and somehow make it out to be your fault. your mild irritation slowly subsided as he stretched his hand out towards you

“‘m not repeating myself”

“have you always been this annoying?” you ask, taking his hand. you suppressed the burning urge to pull him towards you and leave him sprawled on the bristled track. you stood on the balls of your feet, tentatively stretching out your legs. "what the hell is your problem?"

“i wanted to talk to you, but you’ve been ignoring me” he pointed out, and you purposefully avoided meeting his gaze.

“there’s nothing to talk about” you said matter of factly

“there is” he said, “your letter”

you had two options: come clean or play dumb. you chose the latter, a near convincing look of confusion was plastered on your face, “what letter…?”

“this letter” he shrugged, pulling it out of his pocket. a flash of yellow paper came into your period vision as he languidly waved it around in your face.

this complicated situation was no longer a distant nightmare. your words lay bare. it was real. it was your handwriting, your letter, your everything.

“i’ve never seen that in my life”, you adamantly denied, though your quivering bottom lip betrayed you. he raised a brow and began to read the concluding paragraph out loud.

“so i relinquish you from my heart, seishiro nagi. have fun with sora, i could care less now. the two of you deserve each other anyways. you’re a match-“

“can you give that back?” you hissed, trying to snatch it from him and failing in the process. he effortlessly dangled the letter out of your reach. your face burned with embarrassment. you could feel your classmate's eyes on you.

“i think i’ll keep it” he says, and there’s a near evil smile etched on his face that you weren’t remotely aware he was capable of.

“give it back now” you said, glaring at him with jarring intensity, "or i swear i'll end you."

“‘s mine isn’t it?” he asks, tilting his head slightly, “says dear nagi doesn’t it? ‘s my address too”

“you weren’t supposed to get it” you frowned, “i didn't send them out, kiyomi did behind my back, without my consent, so please give it back nagi”

you tried to reason with him. emphasis on tried. your efforts were in vain, nagi was insufferable

“sei” he corrected, the teasing smile on his lips growing as you seethed with rage and embarrassment.

“what?” you spluttered, a look of utter confusion clouding your visage

“you said calling me nagi felt weird”

“oh my god will you stop quoting that stupid letter” you groaned, “give it back you nuisance”

“‘s not stupid, i want to keep it” he says. shoving it back in his pocket, “‘ve never gotten anything like this before”

“i’m not surprised” you huff meanly, “it’s not like you deserve it”

“is it because i stole your first kiss?” he says carelessly, not understanding the weight of his words, “you said it belonged to me anyway-”

“do you hate me?” you shrieked, covering your face in embarrassment, “like do you want me to drop dead? clearly you do”

“‘m sorry it’s just cute” he says, “‘m sorry for stealing your first kiss too…”

“you should be sorry” you retorted. nagi had a lot to apologise to you for, and this painfully awkward interaction was going to make the top of the list

“i just said i am”

“then give me back the letter nagi”

“sei” he corrected again. his grey eyes sparkled with teasing intensity.

you didn’t even grace him with a response. you could feel kiyomi’s eyes on you. she shot you a smile. hopeful, unsure. you shot her a withering look. this was all her fault, her fickle attempt at playing cupid was ruining your life.

you turned on your heel resolving to continue your warm up. you were growing tired of arguing with nagi, in all honesty.

then you saw him.

he was slightly blurred by the distance but you knew it was him. kunigami. he was heading straight towards you.

“fuck my life” you exhaled, squeezing your eyes shut. maybe if you squeezed them hard enough all of this would go away. you opened your (e/c) eyes tentatively. nope. kunigami was so much closer now.

“i’m so sorry” you murmur before locking lips with nagi infront of the entire class. it wasn’t easy considering how tall he was. your arms snaked around his neck and you stood on the absolute tips of your toes, barely reaching him

he raised his eyebrows in shock and disbelief, and maybe a few drops of amusement but to his credit he kissed you back hard, hand on the small of your back, fingers rubbing circles on your hips

your nerves jittered wildly and your heart thumped so hard in your chest you were sure nagi could feel it against his. but you kept kissing him, drowning in lapse after lapse of poor judgment and the faint scent of minty citrus tinging his lips

it was over almost as soon as it had started. you pulled away hesitantly. eyes locking with nagi’s. his grey eyes are blown wide and his lips look freshly kissed, a bright pink that mirrors the blush dusting his cheeks

“the hell was that?” he breathes out. much to his displeasure you pulled away from his grasp and your eyes dart around the field. kunigami was gone. mission accomplished…but at what cost?

“5 laps ‘round the track sawako and nagi” coach harukaze says, “this isn’t some rom-com, keep the lip-locking off my field”

“sorry” you squeak out, the apology was more towards nagi. he looked shell shocked and utterly bewildered. you almost felt bad for dragging him into this mess. but on the other hand, this wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t tripped you. this wouldn't have happened if kiyomi didn't send out your love letters. none of this was your fault.

“‘s fine” he shrugs. but he stares at you as if you’ve sprouted a second head. maybe even a third. he thinks you’re crazy. he thinks you’ve completely lost the plot but he refrains from expressing this because he thinks he's crazy too.

reo is jogging up towards him. looking straight out of a perfume advert. he deserves background music with how beautiful he looks. a paradox of the pain he feels brewing inside his chest after watching you kiss his best friend.

you shoot him a nervous look as you walk towards the white markings of the starting line, leaving the pair standing alone.

“dude what was that?” reo asked, violet eyes tinged with confusion, “i thought you said you were going to talk to her?”

“i was” nagi says, raking a hand through his hair, “we were talking...then she jumped me”

he touched his lips gingerly. it was just sinking in that you’d kissed him. and he’d kissed you back. and he'd liked it. a week after breaking up with sora. didn’t that make him an asshole?

“did she tell you why?” reo prods, snapping nagi out of his trance, he's practically interrogating him now “was it because of the letter?”

“i think so…” nagi trailed off, “i don’t know, this is such a pain”

“nagi! does that look like running two thousand meters to you??” the coach hollers, “less yapping more running beanstalk”

nagi exhales loudly, frustration clouding his face. his brain was throbbing, he’d never had so much to think about at once. he hated being confused.

“talk later” he murmured to reo, before breaking into a lazy jog. his head was swimming . he couldn’t get the stupid kiss out of his head. you tasted like strawberries with faint undertones of something he couldn’t quite place a finger on

why did you have to kiss him?? the letter had already messed with his head significantly and now he was losing it. he almost wanted to trip you again for revenge when you sprinted past him. but he refrained. he had a feeling it wouldn’t result in a sweet earth shattering kiss again, more of an earful of curses

twenty minutes later, you slowed to a halt. beads of sweat trickled down your face and your tongue tasted like sandpaper. the track was completely devoid of sound. no one remained but you, nagi and coach harukaze

“i should really give you extra laps” coach harukaze said, shaking his head discontentedly, “but you’re cutting into my lunch break”

“it won’t happen again” you said, honesty dripped from your words like honey. you meant every word. it truly wouldn’t reoccur. you wouldn’t be kissing nagi on the track. you wouldn’t be kissing him, period. you’d resolved to pretend he didn’t exist — nagi..? didn’t ring any bells

“i should hope not” he scoffed, turning his attention away from you and bearing the brunt of his glare on nagi, “and you casanova, have detention with me again for skipping practice this morning”

nagi blew his bangs out of his face exasperatedly. “‘m not gonna come”

“ahh you insolent brat” coach harukaze seethed, “i’ll bench you for the rest of the season!”

“you wouldn’t, 'm your star player"

“both of you, pick up all the cones and take them to the storage closet” your coach ordered, “and maybe clean it up while you’re at it”

“no way” you spluttered in protest, “let nagi do it by himself, he’s the one mouthing off”

“do you want detention too, miss president?” he asked, a menacing grin blooming across his face. "friday wasn't enough for ya?" you shook your head fervently. you wholeheartedly believed this day couldn’t get any worse

“no thank you” you murmured weakly. moving to pick up the cones and batons scattered on the track. you wanted to get this over and done with as fast as possible-

“why’d you kiss me?” nagi asked, as if his words held no weight, “do you still like me or something?”you thought he would've gone off and left you to do all the work by now. instead, he settled for trailing you like a shadow.

you don’t grace him with a response. convincingly acting as if he was no more than a fly. you’d hoped he’d take the hint and leave you to your own devices. you were irritated and sweaty, all you wanted to do was take a shower and change out of your pe uniform that was clinging to your skin. but you were stuck hauling physical education equipment

you’d dumped the last of the cones in the storage closet, sneezing quietly as a storm of dust filled your senses. then nagi’s voice piped up again

“ look, you’re great in your own way. but i’m not ready for another relationship” the words sounded mechanical, as if he'd been practising them in his head for the last few minutes — he had.

the tenderness in which he said your name almost melted your heart completely. almost

“i don’t want you” you said plainly, folding your arms over your chest “not even in the slightest.”

“then why did you kiss me?” he asked, sounding completely helpless. you were driving him near insanity. he hated being confused. he hated having to think so much, to feel so much. he was losing his mind.

“it’s none of your business” you shrugged, pushing the closet door open and stepping into the hallway

“it is my business! you kissed me in front of our entire form class” he spluttered, trailing after you

“well go figure it out yourself then, since you know so much”

“what- sawako-” he started, but you bolted then. and he couldn’t be bothered to chase after you. nagi really didn’t understand girls. he figured you were all wired differently. so complicated. so confusing

. . . ❀ “you did what???” bachira exclaimed, his vibrant sunny eyes nearly popping out of his head, “you kissed nagi?? (y/n) you kissed-”

“megs keep your voice down” you huffed, covering his mouth with your hand. his mom let out an explosive laugh as she spun around in her chair. your face flushed with embarrassment, “it was a mistake!”

“he doesn’t think that” he laughed, squirming away from you, before nudging you with his elbow. you had half a mind to dump his pineapple flavoured soda water over his head

bachira didn’t go to hakuho high with you, he went to namikaze in an entirely different prefecture, but his mom was substituting as an art teacher whilst your teacher was on maternity leave. the brunette with mesmerizing golden highlights only stopped by to drop lunch off for yu,

then he’d stick around and keep you company, cross-legged on the carpet, while his mom ate her food and chipped in occasionally

“he can think whatever he wants” you shrugged, passing meguru the pack of sour skittles you shared between you, “and he can burn that letter while he’s at it”

“ooo speaking of letters” bachira sang, pulling his out of his bag and handing it to you, the wrinkled envelope had blue ink splotches beside peeling off dolphin stickers “you can have this back”

“thank you” you sighed, relief washing over you, “sorry for not texting you back all weekend, i was such a mess”

“nahhh” he giggled, waving you off, “‘m sure you got a billion other messages from your cute little harem”

“i did” you groaned, slumping against the wall, “kunigami must’ve called me at least a hundred times by now” guilt crawled under your skin. you’d promised kuni things wouldn’t change between you and they had, "and he wanted to walk to school with me this morning"

“you can’t avoid him forever” he quipped, chugging his pineapple favoured ramune with vigor, “i would've taken you hostage by now and forced you to talk to me. nagi had the right idea"

“yeah you would ‘cause you’re a freak” you said, scrunching up your nose and scowling at him. "you and nagi are a bunch of weirdos"

“a freak you were in love with” he giggled. you swat at him playfully, “you’re so cute (y/n)”

“oh my god shut up” you sigh, rolling your eyes exasperatedly, “i wish kiyomi never sent those out”

“why did she anyway?” bachira asks, curiosity shining in his eyes like a red giant star, “i know you said she wanted to play cupid but that can't be the only reason. what if she's secretly in love with you? that's romantic as hell you've gotta hand it to her”

“you’re crazy” you splutter, and you can hear yu snickering under her breath “you don’t even try to hide it..”

“kiyomi’s the crazy one” he mutters, shaking his head, “thank you for the letter though”

“you’re not welcome”

“i’m serious!!!”

“you’re never serious”

“i mean it (n/n)” he says, and all the usual playfulness in his voice is gone, “it’s probably the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me”

“that’s actually cute” you murmur, ruffling his already messy hair, “you’re welcome megs”

unlike the other boy’s you’d loved before, you’d never really stopped loving bachira. your feelings for him just became platonic, as they had with kunigami until they started bubbling up again.

“just keep your head up” bachira said, cupping your face in his hands and squishing your cheeks together “it can’t get any worse”

“don’t jinx it” you say, shaking your head, “i’ll text you later megs” you reluctantly stand up from the comfortable carpet, smoothing your skirt down and slipping out of the art room

. . . ❀ you’re in a daze as you trudge to geography, you’d typically sit beside kiyomi, but that was out of the question. you opted to sit beside reo instead. the stream of questions came as soon as you came in contact with the chair

“so…you and nagi huh?” he hums, a teasing smile tugging at the corner of his lips, it doesn't quite reach his violet eyes

you sigh, embarrassment tinging your face, “did he tell you about the letter? did you know about it this morning?”

"yes.... i saw it first” he admits sheepishly, rubbing his hand against the nape of his neck “he’s too lazy to check his mail so i do it for him, but there's no need to feel embarrassed or anything, it's just me”

“i’m screwed” you sigh, “mikage can you fly me out to mars or something?” you'd rather be anywhere than on earth right now. you'd even settle for burning on the sun.

“can’t do that” he hummed, “not when you’re dating my best friend”

“i’m not-” you spluttered, "we're not- i'm not dating nagi,"

“that’s not what he said” he shrugs, picking up his pen nonchalantly and flicking through his notebook

“what…?” could nagi possibly be annoying.. and delusional? you wouldn't put it past him. nagi was a complex jigsaw puzzle that you were once able to comprehend. now he was a mystery to you. (and vice versa)

“kunigami asked him about you during lunch” reo explained, “he just waltzed up to our table and started interrogating us”

“and what did nagi say?” you queried, curiosity and nausea clung to your being. "is he crazy? kunigami knows we don't talk at all, there's no story convincing enough to negate that"

“well he said he really liked you, said he saw you a lot at the konbini during spring break” reo shrugged "he also said you were keeping it on the downlow, and kiyomi was mad because you kept it a secret so she sent out the letters"

"oh" you gasped, nagi had singlehandedly helped you solve your problems. he had no reason to. you weren't friends. you weren't even on good terms, "why the hell would he do that??"

“kunigami believed it” reo raised a brow, completely bewildered, “the drama is more or less over now shouldn’t you be relieved?”

“it's not really over, she sent out five letters. though i would be under normal circumstances.” you mused, “but nagi isn’t normal,”

“point taken” reo laughs, his eyes twinkling with amusement, “are you going to keep up the charade..?” he doesn't want you to. he's butthurt that you'd written five love letters and he wasn't the receiver of a single one

“obviously not” you splutter, “first and foremost…sora would kill me?? she's already going to kill me for kissing him” you said the last part under your breath

“sora’s the one who dumped nagi” reo pointed out, ever the critical thinker, “she cheated on him with a college kid, why would she care?”

“because she practically owns him” you said pointedly, “everyone knows that nagi belongs to sora, he always”

“nagi’s his own person” reo said defensively, as mad as he was about this entire situation, he jumped to his best friend's defence. you raise an eyebrow skeptically, but chose to reserve your comments.

an uncomfortable silence hangs between you and reo for the rest of the hour. you’re elated when the bell rings and you bolt out of mr. mishima's class

your short-lived happiness depletes and your jaw drops when you see nagi waiting for you beside your locker, as if he had a right to be there. he gave you a once over, sleepy grey eyes locking with your (e/c) ones

“can you move” you say impatiently, avoiding his burning gaze. he shook his head, heavy lidded eyes fixed on you

“tell me why you kissed me first” he said, "you owe me that much"

“can you…get over that?” you muttered, “it was just a kiss, i didn’t make-out with you or anything”

his eyebrows furrowed slightly and a pink tinge crept up his face, “so it meant nothing to you?”

“it meant nothing to you when you kissed me in middle school” you countered, nudging him out of the way with your hip

he wanted to argue with you, he wanted to tell you it was his first kiss too and it meant a lot to him. but he didn’t. he moved out of your way wordlessly and he watched you fish out your history books with an almost wistful expression on his face

“why would you tell kunigami we’re dating?” you asked, narrowing your gaze as you slammed your locker shut. "as a matter of fact, why would you come up with that story for me?"

he shrugs. you’re beyond irritated by his nonchalant attitude . you’re almost tempted to pull his hair out. you think it looks stupid, curling around his face, making him look cute when he was actually the worst

“can you answer me?” you asked, he spared you a brief glance before walking away. you stormed after him, steam nearly blowing off the top of your head

you tug at his slightly rumpled blazer as he strolls in-front of you. he tilts his head and shoots you an expectant look. your stomach turns, butterflies erupting and making your face heat up.

“let me walk you to class first” he says, “then i’ll answer you”

“in your dreams” you scoff, swerving around him and speed walking to class. he’s not very far behind you and when you plop down on your seat, he sinks into the chair beside you

“can’t you sit somewhere else?” you ask, “you’re drawing unnecessary attention to us” you didn't really mind, kunigami usually sat beside you in history and that would've been an absolute shit show

“us?” he asks, he’s smiling now and you want more than nothing to wipe it away. even if you have to kiss it off his stupid face.

“you are insufferable” you sigh, “just go to sleep or something” you didn’t need to tell him twice. nagi had been fighting sleep all day. he was beyond drained, due to a late night gaming session and the unwavering train of thoughts powering through his head.

“okay” he murmurs sleepily, leaning against you and resting his head in the crook of your neck. he feels you tense up against him and he smiles. fair play, you'd done worse to him today.

“stop it” you whisper harshly, trying to pry him away, “have you finally lost it?"

"'m trying to help you" he shrugs, but to your relief, he slips off your shoulder and slumps against the table. closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep

you take this opportunity to examine his features; his chalky pale skin and sharp cheekbones and soft white hair, falling against his face. you're hyperaware of him. of how his eyelashes brush his cheeks when he turns his head towards the window, hyperaware of his steady breathing

with the sunlight streaming through the classroom window bathing his body and casting a golden glow across your face, he looks ethereal. the soft look on his face chipped at your newfound hatred for him. you almost liked him when he was docile and asleep. almost

you forced your eyes away from his sleeping form. you stared at your history notes as the class progressed uneventfully. you tried to focus on the lecture but your brain was still running amok

you'd had such a long day. you hands fisted themselves in frustration as you replayed the last few days in your head. you couldn't believe this was your life now. all the drama, the irrational decisions. it felt like you were the tragic main character in a cliché love story

you'd kissed nagi. in front of kunigami. in front of everyone. and even worse, your love letters were out. you didn't even want to imagine rin's reaction. or isagi's. you sighed, rubbing your face tiredly.

nagi shifts, pulling you out of your spiralling thoughts. you turn your head to check if he was stirring and finally waking up and found him still sound asleep.

except his head was resting near your arms on your desk. for some reason, you couldn't stop yourself from staring at him. you were irritated now. why did he have to look good? why couldn't he look like a troll so you could hate him with ease?

oh god he smelled nice too. 'don't think about nagi' you scolded yourself mentally 'he's insufferable and he's a nuisance' you looked back down at your notes, determined to pretend he didn't exist

after what felt like hours the lesson finally came to an end and you packed your stuff quickly. you moved to stand up and leave when an hand wrapped around your wrist and yanked you back down

you fell ungraciously onto your seat and shot nagi a withering glare. kunigami catches your eye as he leaves the classroom. auburn eyes heavy with underlying sadness. you felt awful. you swallowed, averting your gaze.

your gaze flies back to the boy beside you, who's now gazing down at you, a soft, sleepy smile playing at his lips. a wolf in sheep's clothing. one would think he wasn't pure evil.

"we can talk now" nagi yawns. you shake free of his hold before he's able to pull you any closer.

"what makes you think i'm still interested in anything you have to say?" you retort coolly. he cocks his head slightly at you

"stop being confusing" nagi complains, "'s such a pain"

"stop being annoying" you shoot back. he grumbles but to your satisfactions he doesn't argue. you sigh exasperatedly before continuing, "i guess we can head to the field"

he’s surprised when you loop your hand through his and tug him behind you. so much for not wanting to draw attention to yourself...nagi stumbles forward slightly, caught off guard, before following along.

his hand was warm in yours, sparks stung your palms and you dropped it like it was blazing metal. he shot you a confused look but he said nothing as you walked through the hallways and made your way outside. you hightailed it to the bleachers and sat down, wringing your hands in your lap

nagi took his sweet time sitting down. shuffling over until he was right next to you, propped up on his forearms. the sun cast the skyline muted shades of orange, pink, and blue.

"why did you cover for me?" you ask, "and don't ask me why i kissed you, because you're smart enough to put two and two together"

"'cause we're friends" he shrugged, "'s a hassle but i'm helping you"

"we haven't been friends for years" you point out, "and i said you were on the waiting list"

"i know" nagi replies, "but i still helped you" you wanted to know why he had. nagi was selfish. you knew that. but here he was proving you wrong. it unnerved you.

"i'm telling kunigami we broke up" you said simply. nagi blinked at you in surprise. he really didn't understand you. but he found that he wanted to. he had before, it shouldn't be too hard now.

"why would you do that?" he asked, raising a brow

"because we're not even dating, he deserves to know the truth" you shrugged, crossing your legs and leaning comfortably on the metal seat behind you "and you’re hooked on sora"

“‘m not” he said adamantly. although he wasn’t fooling you at all. not in the slightest. you shook with peals of laughter, the saccharine sounds wafting around the empty field

“you so are. you’ve been on and off for ages. she’ll come crawling back in a few weeks and you'll go back to her without hesitating”

"'s not funny" he frowns. his typical 'x' pout more prominent than ever, " and 's not true either, i'm done with her"

“it is funny nagi," you say, stifling your giggles, "and she's not done with you. i'm sure the college guy won't last a week" you pat his arm reassuringly, but his frown deepens. you're sure he's about to cuss you out, but the words that leave his lips nearly floor you..

“date me.”

"what??" you splutter, "are you crazy?"

"it’ll drive her insane” he pleads, “she’s always been jealous of you"

"that's even worse" you said appalled, "she'll get revenge on me for being with you. which is pointless because i don't even like you."

"i'll make it worth it" he said, and he sounds desperate now. his grey eyes drip with abundant pleas. his hands are clasped together.

"i’ll think about it" you say, locking eyes with him, he anticipated your verdict with bated breath "yeah hell no! i just told you she’ll kill me??"

“if we're being realistic ‘s not like you have a choice” he says, “with your love letter predicament,”

“you’re annoying” you frown, “has anyone ever told you that?”

"you have, dunno about anyone else 'though” he says truthfully, he probably wouldn’t have been paying attention “ just say yes, ‘s not a real relationship. it's just until everything blows over” 

you contemplate what he said for a minute. for once you had to admit he was being completely logical. you couldn’t deny it. after all, you had no other option, and you needed this more than he did.

if rin or yoichi wrote you back you'd have more on your plate and having a 'boyfriend' would make things less awkward....

"fine" you sigh reluctantly. if anyone had told you a few days ago, that your lover letters would be out and you were agreeing to a fake relationship with nagi — who you hadn't spoken to in ages — you would've called them crazy. but here you were

"solid" he grins, stretching out his hand to shake on it you stare down at his big, veiny extended hand and swat it away.

“we need a contract first” you shook your head, pulling open one of your notebooks and searching for a pen.

“ahhh you’re such a pain” he groaned, “what do we need a contract for, i'm not paying you, you're not paying me”

“boundaries” you said , “work with me, lazy”

“‘m not lazy” he huffed, but relented. he watched intently as you wrote out a title in intricate cursive.

fake dating contract ⭑ 1. no kissing

"first condition, no kissing" you recited aloud. you glance up from your notebook and see a gobsmacked expression on nagi's face. he spluttered uncharacteristically 

“what??” he was dumbfounded, “how are people supposed to think we’re dating if we don’t kiss”

“hand holding, hugs” you said, listing them out on your fingers, “insta posts etcetera”

“you’re joking right?” he asks, “‘s not a very funny joke”

“do i look like i’m joking?” you say impatiently, “the rule stands loser, why do you want to kiss me so bad??”

“whatta pain” he grumbles, pulling out his phone and loading into an fps game. the blaring music filled the silence between you. "sora was always asking me to write her notes, add that to the contract”

“that is so corny" you grimaced, but the idea of nagi writing you cute little post-it notes didn't seem all that bad

⭑ 2. nagi has to write (y/n) notes

"'s funny you say that, considering the fact you're in this mess because of your corny love letters" he chuckles

you shoot him a meaningful glare as you write down the next condition “you have to come to my volleyball games”

"you should come to my soccer games too, it’s only fair"

⭑ 3. we have to go to each other's games

"you’ve got to make me your wallpaper" you said, he glanced at his phone and shrugged. he didn’t really mind. once all this was over he could just change it back to choki

"you gotta make me yours too" he yawns, resting his cheek against his knuckles and gazing at you.

“ughh” you grimace, “c’mere let me take a picture of you then” you take a moment to appreciate the setting sun's warm glow, casting beautiful shadows on nagi's face as he gazes sleepily at you. the soft hues of the setting sun and the shadows it casts dance on his face as you take the picture

as much as you hate to admit it, it's pretty cute. you return to scribbling in your book as he settles back into his game. or at least that's what you thought. he wordlessly takes a picture of you writing the condition down in your notebook. he thinks you look pretty like this. focused and concentrated with your brow furrowed in concentration

“delete that” you say, not even looking up from your notebook. he shakes his head, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. as weird as this was, he didn't mind hanging out with you

"'s my new wallpaper" he shrugs, "it's candid"

you scowl lightly but you let it go. none of this was real. it didn't matter "whatever loser, we have to go on dates too”

“that's fine, just no house parties, except the sports ones” he says, "sora was always dragging me to those"

“when have i ever gone to a house party?” you laugh, "i mean casual dates, like arcades or whatever. you can pick i guess"

he'd like that, more than he was willing to admit, even if it wasn't real. his dates with sora were painfully boring. shopping, partying. nothing he enjoyed. it didn't makes sense for him to compare you to sora, after everything, but he couldn't help it. you were consuming his thoughts

"sure" he said nonchalantly, his eyes glued to the fps game on his phone.

“also no snitching” you add, “mikage already knows but i guess he’s trustworthy. we can’t tell anyone else this is fake”

"that would defeat the entire purpose” you had to agree with him on that. you gave your list a once over. you could always add more to the contract if the need arose.

⭑ 1. no kissing ⭑ 2. nagi has to write (y/n) notes ⭑ 3. we have to go to each other's games ⭑ 4. we have to go on dates ⭑ 5. no snitching

"okay sign” you said, handing him the pen and the notebook. you grabbed them back almost instantly “wait i forgot one!!” you said, “no falling in love, this is temporary”

“haven’t you already broken that one?” he mused, raising an eyebrow at you. your cheeks flushed and you shoved the notebook into his hands

“just sign the contract nagi"

tags 🏷️: @nishimaru @peachesncats @shacha (open)

©y2kuromi 𝜗𝜚 2024 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 LOVE LETTERS ?! O1: parallel lines

synopsis: love is a foreign concept, often hard to express in words. except your feelings poured into the sweetest letters, intended for your eyes only. when the saccharine envelopes are mailed out to the five boys you’ve loved sparks fly, hearts break and chaos ensues. “heavily inspired by tatbilb”

𝖎. series : seishiro nagi x f! reader (she/they) | wc: 2.2k | contents : semi-angst (if you squint) conflict! chaos, fake dating trope. kinda? forced proximity. toxic/fake friends, cheating! heavy pining second person (you/your/yours) flashbacks & swearing in italics

𝖎. notes : i actually loved writing this chapter. especially because the real chaos starts now ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ i'll try and update as much as i can!

⇆ series masterlist prev: dear nagi next: stars aligned

FRIDAY,

. . . ❀ you scribbled furiously on a pale post-it note. the words “where are my letters?” were etched in smooth graphite markings. you needed to know desperately.

your mind hadn’t been at peace since you woke up and discovered your ‘best friend’ and your love letters were missing. you’d hightailed it to school shortly after but kiyomi avoided you like the plague. you were now sitting in geography class — hours to the semi-finals —desperately trying to talk to her

you tossed the post-it onto her desk and she ignored it. the pile of sticky notes was growing larger by the second.

“kiyo” you hissed, “this isn’t funny answer me!”.to your distaste the strawberry blonde ignored you. her viridian eyes remained glued to the faded geography textbook

“oh my god!” you whisper-yelled. except you didn’t really whisper. you just yelled. the sea of students pivoted and you sat like a deer caught in headlights

“sawako” mr. mishima said, his voice sending chills down your spine, “would you like to share this enlightening piece of information with the rest of the class?”

“no…” you sighed, “not really”

“i’m waiting” his boney fingers tapped impatiently on his desk, “it’s that or detention after class”

“i’ll take detention then” you said through gritted teeth. you shot kiyo a withering glare as you trudged towards mr.mishima’s desk and collected the pink detention slip

your classmates gawked at you in amazement. (y/n), student council president, volleyball captain and little miss perfect? got detention? it didn’t seem plausible. not for a million years

you sat through the rest of the class with a stoney look on your face. why would kiyo take your letters? what did she want? your resignation as captain??

the strawberry blonde you’d grown to trust more than anyone averted your gaze. she bit down on her lip anxiously awaiting the bell, and bolted the second its shrill ringing echoed in the classroom

as far as you were concerned, she could burn in hell.

you gathered your things together sluggishly. you weren’t particularly eager to head to detention.

your geography textbook landed in your bag with a thud and you squeezed your eyes shut. you’d die if she sent them. you could already feel your heart stopping and your cells dying

“i’m really disappointed sawako” mr mishima frowned as your last classmate filed out. reo mikage, the resident rich kid kiyomi was head over heels in love, flashed you a pitying look

“i can explain i swear” you pleaded, it was starting to dawn on you that being stuck in detention would prevent you from playing against niiyama today

“is there really a valid explanation for disrupting class?”

“no….yes….i don’t know!” you wailed, “kiyomi took something of mine, well some things actually and they’re very personal and sentimental”

normally , you detested snitches but your life was on the line

“did she take them in school?”

“no..”

“then you should settle that externally” he scolded, “unfortunately your detention still stands”

“mr mishima please” you said, desperation clutching your voice, “the semi-finals are today and i’ve got to play”

“the most i can do is give you one hour rather than an hour thirty and then you’ll have to write an essay on the importance of tourism” he shrugged, “regardless of the trigger you still disrupted my class”

you gaped at him, astounded by the severity he was handling you with. you pressed your lips firmly together and nodded, trudging out of the classroom and down the hallway

“hey (y/n)!” a familiar voice called, you spun around to see kunigami standing in the midst of the sea of doors. he was holding up a bag you were sure was filled with seaweed snacks

“hey kuni” you said, waving and flashing him a half-hearted smile, “what’s up?”

“i was going to ask if you were down to talk before your game” he admitted, auburn eyes boring into yours

“can’t” you said plainly, “got detention thanks to kiyomi”

“oh” he frowned, you felt slightly irritated. he didn’t get to wait on you now. you’d been chasing him for ages and just as you’d moved on he wormed his way into your life

“maybe next time” you shrugged, leaving him standing in solitude. you stumbled across the old classroom hakuho used for detention. it had the perfect view of the field and the rest of the campus

you slid the door open. the dusty room was near empty, save for seishiro nagi sleeping soundly at the back. he jolted uptight, glancing around confused until he locked eyes with you

he gave you a once over with his dull grey eyes and plopped his head back on the table. you pulled out the chair beside him and sat down wordlessly

the silence was deafening, save for the faint huffs of breathing and the sage clock ticking obnoxiously

“so…why’d you get detention?” you asked, peering at nagi with curious eyes. you’d heard he practically lived here, “after missing school for a day, that was fast”

“offered the teacher some melonpan” he said, not even bothering to lift his head off the table

you stifled giggles as you pictured the tall boy offering his teacher sweet buns rather than an answer. you only shared one class with him, which was history and the only thing he did was sleep

“i bet you were sleeping as-well” you mused, pointing an accusing finger at him, “like you are right now”

“why’re you here anyways” he grumbled, screwing up his face as he gazed at you. you thought he looked cute like this. eyes hazy with sleep and his messy bangs a curtain for his face, “aren’t you s’pposed to be perfect or something”

“it’s a long story” you grimaced, “i’m just worried coach’ll bench me today.”

“what’s today?” nagi asked, his voice laced with the precipice of sleep

“uhm friday?”

he exhaled exasperatedly before asking again, “what’s happening today?”

“ohh” you laughed, “we’re playing niiyama’s girls volleyball team. it’s the semi-finals for nationals”

“you got into the semi-finals?” he asked, letting out a whistle of approval , “that’s cool”

“thanks” you grinned, your smile dropped a split second later, “i don’t think i get to play today”

“you’re the star player” he murmured, “‘least that’s what reo said”

“when’d you become such good friends with mikage?” you asked, “i thought it was just you and sora” you clapped your hand over your mouth once you realised how insensitive that was

“we broke up” he said, shrugging his shoulders as if it didn’t matter to him. but you knew nagi. his eyes were sunken and he was more withdrawn than ever

“i know” you cringed, “are you okay?” you looked at him with such tenderness he could feel his heart breaking again.

“yeah” he nodded, “‘s fine”

you knew it wasn’t fine, but you weren’t going to push. after so many years of friendship you’d learnt nagi hated talking about his feelings

“you should come to the game today” you blurted, in an attempt to curve the jarring silence, “we won’t disappoint”

“don’t wanna” he yawned, “volleyball games are boring”

“blasphemy” you gasped, “take that back or i’ll end you”

“you’re so weird” he laughed. butterflies fluttered in your stomach. his laugh was quite literally the sweetest thing you’d ever heard

“you’re in detention ‘cause of melon bread” you snickered, “it doesn’t get any weirder than that”

he hummed in agreement, “d’you think sora cheated ‘cause i’m weird?” he asked. and that’s when you knew that girl really did a number on him. nagi despised people who spoke negatively about themselves and here he was doing just that

“funny question! i think sora cheated because she’s weird” you were really satisfied with your answer, even more so because nagi was laughing again

“why’d we stop being friends?” he asked, his frame shook as the softest giggles left his lips, “i haven’t laughed like this in ages”

“it was your fault!” you said, and it was, “we can be friends now i guess…there’s a long queue for that so you’ll have to wait a few business days”

“i don’t mind” he said softly, and you knew he meant it. his eyes were as bright as the glistening stars in the night sky, “‘s not a hassle”

the shrill ringing of the whistle pierces through your consciousness. your (e/c) eyes light up with excitement and triumph. hakuho had scored the winning point in yet another thrilling volleyball match. the elation in your heart was palpable.

as the crowd erupted in cheers,. you couldn't help but let a smile grace your lips as you looked over at your teammates, their faces beaming with pride.

you felt  a weight lifting off your shoulders, the pressure of expectations and the sinking feeling of your problems with kiyomi momentarily forgotten.

"you guys are amazing" the other team's captain said, she had messy ginger hair scraped into a low ponytail and her sportsmanship was leagues above her teammates who looked as if they were on the verge of tears.

"thanks" you grinned, "really good game, see you in the finals hopefully" you added, hoping to get rid of the other team's intense gaze before it could make you uncomfortable.

"hell yeah to that"she cheered, backing away from the net and returning to her teammates. you did the same, joining your teammates by the bleachers. they immediately enveloped you in a crushing group hug

"you played really well today, (y/n)!"

"yeah! we couldn't have won without you!"

"best captain in the league hands down!!!!"

you smiled softly, the praise warmed your chest pleasantly, "i couldn't have done anything without my amazing team" you responded simply. contentment settled in your heart at the affectionate comments your teammates showered you with.

except kiyomi.

she stared at you with a blank expression as she gulped down water. the chemistry between you during the match had been severed.

“kiyo” you said, slipping away from the rest of the team and sitting down beside her. you wordlessly handed her a fresh towel.

“i’m sorry” she sobbed, the tears seemed to erupt from the depths of her soul, “i’m really sorry (y/n)”

“why did you take them?” you asked warily, “you know what it doesn’t even matter just tell me you didn’t send them”

she sniffled loudly and you bit the inside of your cheek so hard you could almost taste blood. you wanted to scream. you wanted to end her

“i-i did” she said quietly, looking down in shame

“oh my-” you let out a strangled groan, “why the hell would you do that??” you instantly thought back to the hour you’d just spent with nagi. the rekindled friendship would come crashing down the second he saw it.

and oh…kunigami. you could feel tears prickling at the back of your eyes. you couldn’t cry here. you just couldn’t.

“i’m so sorry (y/n) i-“ kiyomi hiccuped, “i was trying to play c-cupid”

“with five guys???” you hissed, “do you know how embarrassing this is? did you think for a second you’d be ruining my life??”

“i’m sor-”

“no i’m sorry” you said, venom laced in your words, “i’m sorry i didn’t listen to minai when she told me you were no good”

you shoved yourself off the bench, angry tears stung your eyes. you blinked them back furiously, stumbling blindly through the crowd of students. the sound of their sweet congratulations shot sour daggers in your chest. come monday they’d be pelting you with insults and scorn. you could already feel it

“careful!” someone said, but it was too late. you were crashing into reo at the speed of light. your nose was engulfed in the exquisite scent of versace eros

“sorry” you said, your cheeks flushed with embarrassment . god could this day get any worse??

“you’re all good adara” reo said, concern dripping from his amethyst eyes, “are you okay?”

“i’m fine” you said unconvincingly, “i just need to get out of here”

“we were just heading out” nagi piped up. you hadn’t even noticed he was there, especially because he said he wouldn’t be coming. you figured reo dragged him here “wanna tag along?”

the thought of becoming closer with the grey eyed boy and having it negated by the stupid letter you’d written three years ago sounded sadistic

“i’m good” you said, shaking your head profusely, “thanks nagi,”

“suit yourself” reo hummed, you stuck your tongue out at him

“later mikage, bye nagi” you waved

“reo” he corrected, you rolled your eyes. he’d been telling you to call him reo since middle school. you refused

you darted around the pair and slipped out of the gymnasium

the wind stung against your cheeks. the sky above was a collage of cascading pink, purples and oranges. the sun dipped gracefully behind buildings. despite the beauty, there was an unpleasant chill in the air; a reminder of what awaited you on monday.

you trudged dejectedly across campus, your duffle bag swung against your hip as you walked out the gate. you contemplated switching schools. maybe even leaving the country but you knew you wouldn’t

“just strike me down dude” your groaned, looking up at the sky. much to your dismay, lightning didn’t flash and end your suffering

you got home safely and crashed on the sofa in a heap of sweat and despair. when you woke up hours later the blazing sun had been replaced by the stars and the vast, murky canvas of the night sky

you picked up your phone warily. heart drumming in your ears. yep. just as you feared your notification center was a symphony of chaos

+5 missed calls from: kiyo

+25 missed calls from : ren ren: can we talk? + 10 new messages

+1 new message from: megs aww i think ur cute 2!

+1 new message from : sei got your letter :x

©Y2KUROMI 𝜗𝜚 2024 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 LOVE LETTERS ?! prologue: dear nagi,

synopsis: love is a foreign concept, often hard to express in words. except your feelings poured into the sweetest letters, intended for your eyes only. when the saccharine envelopes are mailed out to the five boys you’ve loved sparks fly, hearts break and chaos ensues. “heavily inspired by tatbilb”

𝖎. series: seishiro nagi x f! reader (she/they) | wc: 2.8k | contents: semi-angst (if you squint) chaos, fake dating trope. kinda? forced proximity. toxic/fake friends, cheating! heavy pining second person (you/your/yours) flashbacks & swearing in italics .

𝖎𝖎. notes: (y/n)'s last name is adara-sawako although it's not entirely important, i just imagined her as mixed because lara-jean is mixed. the oc's only exist for plot. this chapter is a bit boring but it gets good i promise!

⇆ series masterlist next chapter: parallel lines

THURSDAY ,

. . . ❀ you vividly believed love existed far beyond the body. a bittersweet entanglement of the souls. you could find love in almost everything: the rain pattering gently on concrete, sliding intimately down flower petals. the sun bathing the universe in it’s golden haze. you gawked at the sky and you saw love. in truth, you found love in things a plethora of people wouldn’t understand

you’d found love in his spiky orange hair and the fuzzy undercut he took pride in. you found love in his twinkling auburn eyes and his broad arms that felt like the safest place in the world. you fell in love with how humble he was and you fell in love with his morals. you knew him like the back for your hand

despite all these intricacies, rensuke kunigami wasn’t yours.

kunigami was minai’s boyfriend and you adored him just as much as she did. maybe even more…before he belonged solely to her, the three of you had been peas in a pod. then they started hanging out without you and slowly drifted away.

you were pleasantly surprised when kunigami asked to hangout. just the two of you. no minai. your heart hummed in your chest and heat rose to your face as you agreed. your fingers trembled and the thought of spending time with the boy you loved ran rampant in your head. it all came crashing down when he sat down nervously on your bed in the middle of fifa ‘21

“i need your advice on something” his fingers splayed absentmindedly on the faded bonobono plush on your bed, “i like someone”

for a split second you thought it was you. everything would make sense then, maybe him and minai had been working on his feelings together. maybe he liked you. then you saw the way he looked into space, the soft blush that tinged his cheeks and you knew it wasn’t for you

you mentally ran through a list of girls it could be. kunigami didn’t hang around with a lot of girls. could it be sora? the girl from his history class? minai?

“who is it ren” you asked, ignoring the blood rushing to your head, “i’m sure they like you back”

his lips parted, and you wished you knew what it felt like to kiss them. the name was near dripping off his tongue..then his phone rang. and suddenly he had to go.

that night you wrote your letter to kunigami. dear ren…

your eyes prickled with tears that hurt to shed. it would be an understatement to say you cried a lot that night. you sobbed more than you’d even done before. you missed the days when the three of you were inseparable. you missed the days when you’d been a close knit group of six.

you, sei, rin, kunigami, sora and minai

you knew no one stayed forever, but goodbyes never got easier. they left you feeling hollow and broken, holding on tightly to memories that stung. so you let them go. you let go of all the hurt and made new friends. friends that did the clinging rather than you.

kunigami was the one clinging to the past now. minai moved out of the country and he’d begged to do long distance. minai had adamantly said no. she didn’t cry, her voice didn’t even waver. once minai made up her mind she never went back.

he made it your problem entirely, dragging you to the bleachers to talk about himself daily without fail. you were a bit irritated he’d encroached on your after school routine but you were too nice to complain to his face

“i just..i didn’t think she’d really leave me” he frowned. the two of you were sitting on the bleachers sharing seaweed snacks

“people don’t tell you they’re going to leave” you said pointedly, pausing to chew the salty flakes “unless they really mean it”

“i at least thought we’d do long distance” he frowned, “i didn’t want to lose her”

“maybe she didn’t want to lose you, long distance isn’t exactly child’s play” you mused, licking flakes off your fingers

“do you think she’ll change her mind?” he asked. his warm auburn eyes were filled with so much sadness, your heart hurt

“you never know kuni” you shrugged, gathering your books from the metal seat and standing up, “need to train for the semi-finals tomorrow, see ya”

“(y/n) wait” his thick hand grabbed at your wrist. as soon as he did it your heart paused. you forgot to breathe for that fleeting second “promise me you won’t leave me too”

“what?”

“just promise me please” your resolve weakened then. he needed you. rensuke kunigami, the boy you loved a bittersweet year ago, needed you

“i promise” you said feebly, “now let me go, i want to get in some practice before the other girls show up” much to your satisfaction, the sweet ginger let you go

you ran to the gymnasium with your heart crying out profanities. no. you couldn’t like him again. you just couldn’t. that would be really unlucky

you thought there was no such thing as bad luck. things happened. people come and go, no one lives forever. this notion helped you deal with the loss of your father.

you still missed him every day. when you lose your favourite person the emptiness is near impossible to fill. you drowned yourself in student council projects, part-time jobs and volleyball to fill the void. 

sometimes you wished you could go back to the simplicity of grade school. when your only problem was wondering whether you and nagi would play animal crossing: new leaf or read bonobono

but you knew that wasn't possible. nagi was a stranger to you now.

you slipped into the changing room, the air conditioning was permanently on and goosebumps rose to attention on your soft skin

you substituted your school uniform for the comfortable volleyball tee and shorts. you tucked the blazer with houndstooth lapels into your locker and stuffed the silk skirt and dress shirt under it. you slipped on your trainers and jogged out of the freezing room.

you drummed your fingers absentmindedly against the hard volley ball you picked up from the basket by the net.

hakuho's girls team had the semi finals tomorrow and you needed to be on top of your game. there was nothing harder than being the team captain and the libero. at the dying moment it all came down to you

the pressure made your limbs ache but you'd never give up. your dad had loved volleyball, he'd taken you to watch countless games as a child, swinging you on his broad shoulders so you could see above the crowds. you'd wear matching jerseys and get sticky ice-cream sundaes and steaming bowls of nikujaga at night markets to celebrate

you squeezed your eyes shut, bouncing the ball off the wall and digging it aggressively. you refused to cry despite the stinging in your wrists and the pang in your chest. pain was motivation rather than a weakness.

"christ (y/n) what'd the ball do to deserve that?" kiyomi’s voice echoed through the gymnasium. your (e/c) eyes shot open and your eyes settled on your teammates strolling towards you leisurely arms laden with duffle bags, bentos and crystal clear bottles of water

"no food in my gym" you said teasingly, stretching out of your stance and plopping down on the floor

“how long have you been in here for?”

“not too long” you said honestly, “i was stuck with relationship counselling”

“kuni?” kiyomi asked,sitting down beside you “speaking of break ups guess who broke up!”

kiyomi grinned, tucking her strawberry blonde hair neatly behind her ears. her green eyes sparkled as she basked in the attention of the team.

“nagi and sora! she dumped his sorry ass for a college guy she met over spring break. and i bet she was cheating on him too"

"no way!" you gasped, clasping a hand over your mouth. you'd never thought sora would grow to become a cheater. then again, that went to show people weren't really what they seemed

"why is everyone breaking up? is something in the air?”

“aww i feel so bad for nagi, he’s really cute”

“he didn’t deserve that, sora’s such a little bi-”

"the semi-finals against niiyama are tomorrow" you said quickly, cutting off the chorus of reactions, “as bad as we all feel for nagi, we’ll feel a billion times worse if we don’t bring our a-game tomorrow”

“you heard the captain” kiyomi sang, “two laps round the gym and then practice your serving”

your teammates obediently broke into groups, leaving you and kiyomi sitting cross legged by the wall

“is he okay?” you asked, nibbling on your bottom lip

“who?” she asked, shooting you a knowing look, “the first boy you ever loved? the ok to your lala? (y/n), i think you need a boyfriend, it’ll save you a lot of stress”

“cut it out kiyo” you groaned, burying your face in your hands, “i’m just worried, he was my best friend”

“i don’t think he’s in school today” she said, “he wasn’t in econs, and reo came in without him this morning.”

“shit” you grimaced, “she’s horrible, nagi’s a softie at heart and she probably shattered his-”

“he shattered yours” kiyo said pointedly, “i say karma bit him in the ass.”

“you’re horrible too” you said, laughing as you shook your head.

“you love me” she giggled, “can we hit the konbini before we go to your place? can’t have a sleepover without snacks”

“i’ll think about it” you mused, pushing yourself off the floor and jogging towards the court.

nagi seishiro was the first boy you’d ever loved. the only boy you’d ever kissed. and the first boy you’d written a love letter to. you were fourteen when you fell out of love with him. you were seventeen now and your heart no longer belonged the grey eyed boy. it belonged to no one.

at least that’s what you thought. before your thoughts were consumed by kunigami and nagi now.

long after training, long after the konbini run and long after kiyomi had fallen asleep. you’d crept out of your downy sheets and sifted through your closet.

satisfied when you stumbled upon the (f/c) box at the back. you trudged back to your bed — careful to not wake kiyomi up— and pulled the letters out. there were five in total. to all the boys you’d loved before. seishiro, rin, yoichi, meguru and rensuke. in chronological order. you picked up the first letter

a smile flickered across your face. you vividly remembered what it felt like to pour out your feelings for the first time and seal them in a lemon scented envelope. you’d picked out a bonobono stamp and written nagi’s address in your best cursive….

dear nagi,

it feels so so so weird to call you that. you’ve always been sei to me. i closed my eyes for a second and you became this popular soccer star i barely recognise. and you also got a girlfriend. right after kissing me at rin’s house two years ago.

did you know that when you kissed me it meant everything to me? you’ve always meant a lot to me in retrospect. but in that moment all i wanted was to hold your hand and never let go of you. but i did. i had to. because sora liked you, and you liked her. so why did you kiss me sei? it’s not like we were playing truth or dare or anything. you said i smelled like citrus and then proceeded to steal my first kiss. although i don’t think it really counts as stealing, it belonged to you anyway. it was everything i’d dreamed of and more. i felt like fireworks erupted from every fiber of my being but it was the most natural thing ever. only you made me feel that way. it was over just as suddenly as it started. you went back to playing call of duty like nothing happened. it meant nothing to you. i knew that. yet i thought about it every single second of the day for two years.

and those two years have been torture. i think i lost a few years of my life every time you kissed sora. which was a lot by the way. if i die young, you are solely to blame.

i blame you for a lot of things. it’s not entirely fair but leaving me wasn’t either. i couldn’t bring myself to hate you. i tried. believe me i did. it should’ve been really easy to. you’re the most selfish person i know. it’s honestly a mystery how we stayed friends for so long

do you even remember how we became friends in the first place? you’re never going to see this letter but i’ll remind you anyways. you’ve always been special. you’re amazing, it goes without saying. that’s what made you stand out to me. while other boys ran helter skelter in the playground you would read manga in a corner or play video games. i remember you were reading bonobono, which was my current fave because i was reading it with my dad. i told you everything under the sun about my life, my family, my interests and you just listened, not bothering to shake me off. i stuck to you like glue. we were only seven then. it’s been seven years and i guess the glue’s worn off

i miss you. as a friend more than anything. it sucks that you and sora chose to stop being friends with me, i didn’t deserve that. after all, you kissed me. i thought you were twisted for making me fall in love with you. but now i’ve realised it was inevitable. for a plethora of reasons

firstly, we were inseparable, you know that phrase i loved saying ‘two peas in a pod’ i swore they coined it just for us. we were practically joined at the hip. always there for each other, even if it was just companionable silence.

did you know it meant the world to me when you came to my dad’s funeral last year? i didn’t expect you to show. you never show up for anything. i think that’s one of your only flaws –you’re selfish. you’re unreliable and you’re confusing but then i saw you sitting way at the back, struggling to stay awake and knowing you cared about me enough to show up meant so much to me. it still means a lot to me sei

secondly, you just understood me on a fundamental level. you didn’t give a shit about anyone or anything, except yourself. it was refreshing to be around someone who was like that, sometimes. but mostly you were just likeable. you were cool, funny, smart. i could tell you whatever i wanted without feeling judged. you were so indifferent. it balanced me out. i care so much about everything. despite being polar opposites, you just got me…

and lastly, the most annoying thing about you honestly is how attractive you are and you don’t even try. your stupid messy hair is softer than fresh winter snow. i love winter. i loved you. and your lackadaisical demeanour, i loved your grey eyes, i loved that dumb :x face you always made. i loved sharing secrets and lemon tea with you. i loved sneaking off to the arcade with you. i loved picking out choki with you. i loved watching rom coms with your mom. i loved you nagi. you were the first boy i’d ever loved. i say loved because i like someone else now. 

i never thought i would. but i do! i met him a week ago at summer camp. and he’s everything you’re not. he’s sweet and kind, caring and considerate, and he makes me laugh. and he loves strawberry ice cream. not tangy lemon sorbet . and he likes me. the only thing you're incapable of

so i relinquish you from my heart seishiro nagi. it's something i should have done ages ago. i wish you the worst best with sora, i could care less now. the two of you deserve each other anyways. you’re a match made in hell heaven

(y/n) adara-sawako

p.s. i'm sure you're elated to hear it didn't work out with the guy from camp. his name was isagi and he's still ten times better than you. and you and sora are a horrible couple. what is it your ninth break up this week?

you set the letter down, face flushing with embarrassment. you remembered your feelings being intense but you’d almost forgotten how strong they were. you grimaced as you stuffed all the letters under your pillow and drifted to sleep. you promised yourself you’d get rid of them first thing in the morning

but when you woke up they were gone. and so was kiyomi

©Y2KUROMI 𝜗𝜚 2023 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ 𝗠𝗨𝗦𝗧 𝗕𝗘 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 : satoru gojo x fem! reader

synopsis. there’s nothing casual about your relationship with satoru

contents. as sfw as this trope gets. fluff. angst if you squint. no est rel because fwb ⇢ mutual pining & miscommunication. college au. profanities. kissing eugh. i love this song sm ‹𝟹

satoru can tell something’s up from the moment you pull away from him. one second you’re kissing him like you need to feel him to live and the next you’re backpedaling, eyes shining with something akin to fear.

“‘s something wrong?” he asks, blue eyes flooded with concern. his thumb brushes gently against your bottom lip and he’s surprised to find it’s quivering.

he feels something stirring in his chest, love. he loves you. at first it was just excitement to hook up casually with someone who understood him on a fundamental level, but it quickly became a sharp pang of longing. it quickly became love

he didn’t have much to base the feeling off of. he just knew he felt like he was doing something right when you smiled at him and he felt like he was on top of the world when you kissed him. he’d initially been petrified because he didn’t do feelings. he never had.

he was used to random girls fawning over him, used to them begging desperately for his phone number. used to leading them on for weeks before ghosting them. used to one-night stands remaining one-night stands.

but he wasn’t used to this. feelings. he simply didn’t do them. yet he couldn’t help but care about you. and the fact that you were right here in-front of him with tears brimming your waterline

you shook your head fervently. “no . . sorry, i just needed a second” satoru knows you’re lying. he knows you by heart.

he knows you squint when you’re struggling to read something. he knows you drum your fingers when you’re bored. he knows you hate drinking matcha made with old leaves. he knows your nose crinkles when you laugh. he knows your lips taste like sugar and your breath hitches when he kisses you like you’re the only thing he knows. and he knows so, so much more

but he doesn’t know why you’re lying to him. why you’re so quick to slip from his embrace, why you don’t let him hold your hand in the hallways or why you shrink away from him as if he’s capable of breaking you beyond repair.

(he doesn’t know what’s so bad about being with him wholly)

‘no strings attached’ you’d said, repeating the words over and over like a mantra. bullshit. you’d lost faith in their power the more you uttered them. and your beliefs succumbed to falsehood.

‘no strings attached’ he’d agreed, and it had been easy enough at first. he’d tried not to let his heart drop too much when you kissed him. he’d tried to keep the compliments to a minimum. he’d tried his best, and he’d failed miserably

why did he have to fall in love with the one person that didn’t seem to want him?

“you sure?” he pushes, “something’s clearly on your mind, we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to”

( it’s always been more about you than him.)

“i want to, i wouldn’t be here if i didn’t. i just . . .” you trailed off. you couldn’t find the words to tell him that this wasn’t casual anymore. that shoko had been right when she'd said you couldn't be casual with someone you cared immensely about.

“hmm?” he drank you in, slow and deliberate. you weren’t scared. you were nervous. he chuckled lowly, amusement reverberating in his chest. “c’mon we’re friends aren’t we? you can tell me anything”

friends. you weren’t sure you were still on the same page about what that meant. friends didn’t know each other the way you did. friends didn’t kiss like they needed each other to breathe. you weren’t sure what you two were but you weren’t just friends.

not quite friends, not quite lovers . . simply something good. satoru made you feel good. he made you feel loved. more so than your exes had.

his eyes trailed leisurely over your figure as he bounced his knee absentmindedly to regain your attention. you parted your lips, but the only sound filling the space between you was his unfaltering laughter

it was too hard to speak with the intensity of his blue eyes burning into your head. your mind was undeniably foggy and your sentences were barely comprehensible. his laughter wasn’t making things any easier.

“stop laughing” you whined, burying your face in your palms.

you felt butterflies fluttering in your stomach as his hands traced circles on your hips “i’m trying to talk to you”

“and i’m listening” he laughed, motioning for you to go on. you shifted cautiously in his lap. keeping things casual had been your idea entirely. on paper, hooking up with your best friend after a breakup was a bad idea. a terrible one even.

satoru just happened to have been in the right place at the right time. he just happened to be there when you needed someone to make you feel good. and he didn’t leave

it was easy to do the heart breaking,the ghosting. he’d done it over and over again and he’d walk away unscathed. he could do it in his sleep, in a heartbeat

but he never did. because you were his best friend first, and the benefits didn’t even come second. they were merely an afterthought. because he couldn’t fathom the idea of treating you as if you were just a casual fling, of acting like he didn’t care about you

you’d implored him to, and he had to the best of his abilities but he couldn’t bring himself to hurt you.

“i’ve been thinking about something recently” you murmured, finally making eye contact with him. his eyes are sparkling and you’re sure he’s making fun of you

“yeah, what’s that?” you stare at him for a moment. taking in his messy hair and freshly kissed lips. you wonder if his lips have kissed anyone else’s like they have yours. the thought upsets you more than it should

“how i feel about this. about you” your throat feels dry as the words fall from your lips. “i don’t feel the same way anymore”

fucking finally.

he’s quiet. blinking once, then twice before cracking a lazy grin. you groan inwardly, already regretting treading this path. telling him your feelings ran deeper than casual intimacy, was like handing your heart to a god on a golden platter

“oh? have you finally fallen in love with me?” he teases, poking your ribs and making you scowl, “took you long enough”

“you . .you’re insufferable. you know that?” you deadpan, pinching your nose bridge with faux irritation.

“that doesn’t answer my question” he persists,his eyes are unreadable as they search your expression. he tries to find a crack in your composure, hopeful to see how you truly feel about him. hopeful to see if this feeling went both ways

he was sure he would be forever altered if it didn’t , he was sure he’d never be the same if the feeling wasn’t mutual

“what answer do you want?” you fired back, feeling small under his scrutiny. “do you want me to say i’m head over heels in love with you like everyone else to feed your ego?”

“no! fuck no” he sighs, running a hand nervously through his ivory curls. “that’s not what i want at all”

he knew you didn’t think you two could work. you were too scared to try. and he was too scared of losing you completely to do anything about his crippling feelings for you. you didn’t really want him. he knew that, but that didn’t mean it hurt any less.

“what do you want then?” you can feel frustration seeping into your voice. you were confused, so confused. because you had no solid ground rules

just ‘no strings attached’. it was vague, too hazy. and you’d never really understood what it really meant.

“you,” he shrugs nonchalantly as if it’s the most salient thing in the world. as if his heart isn’t hammering obnoxiously in his chest “thought that much was obvious”

and it all makes sense — his lack of commitment towards other girls. shoko being adamant that you couldn’t possibly keep feelings out of this arrangement. how hard he’d chased you. how gentle he was with you. how much he cared

it had always been because of you. it would always be because of you.

“i know . .” he says quietly, testing the waters, “i know you don’t want to make something out of this and i respect that but that’s not what i want”

“we won’t work” you say feebly, you’re not sure the words convince even you. and they only twist the knife deeper. his eyes are glossy, treading over the edge of disbelief.

you’ve never seen him this vulnerable, an absolute shell of the confident boy worshipped on campus. his lips wobbled faintly and you could almost hear his heart cracking in his chest

“you don’t know that, you can’t say that when we haven’t even tried.” he’s beyond desperate, grabbing your hand and brushing his thumb across your knuckles as if they’re capable of granting wishes

“i want to try” your voice is timorous, “i really do, but i don’t want to be just another girl to you. i don’t want to lose you”

satoru laughs again, but there’s no humor tinging the sound. just immeasurable sadness “you’re never going to lose me” it was irrational for you to think that, if anything he was the one at risk of losing you, of losing everything

and he couldn’t shake the feeling he already had

( he’d thrown away his pride, ego, and dignity, as if they were nothing all so he could comprehend the depths of his feelings for you. all so you could look past gojo, and see satoru

all so you could love him )

“you sure?” you asked tentatively. he was known for his empty promises. for breaking hearts and leaving with situations with only his intact. but he loved you.

that had to count for something. that had to count for everything

“‘m positive” satoru nodded, “i’ve never been more sure about anything in my life”

“okay” the smile that finally tugs at the corners of your lips is sweet, undeniably so. like wisps of cotton candy and ambrosia. so sweet, you leave him insatiable

your hands are gentle as they smooth over his shoulders before looping around his neck. his nose brushes against yours softly and you’re close enough to bask in the scent of cool mint lingering on his breath.

you’re anything but patient having wasted so much time on second guessing. you craved closing the painful distance and pressing his lips to yours. but satoru craved commitment and communication a lot more

“can i take you on a date?” all you can muster is a nod as his bottom lip grazes yours and your fingers card through his ivory curls. it’s a start, it’s not much, but it’s more than enough for him

© Y2KUROMI 2024. please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ [𝟬𝟰:𝟮𝟴 𝗔.𝗠.] : satoru gojo x fem! reader

contents: fluff, fluff, fluff! established relationship. second person pov. js 'toru being soft, i'm so normal abt him i swear!!

a deep-set frown tugs at the corners of satoru's lips when he wakes up to find you missing from your spot next to him. traces of moonlight stream in through the blinds, highlighting the outline of your crumpled silhouette on the cold sheets.

waking up alone has become too often an occurrence for his liking. his brows furrow as his fingers ghost over the imprint on the pillow where you should be — beside him — feeling a pang of something akin to loneliness in his chest.

he sighs, running a hand through his hair. attempting to wake himself up a bit more. with a groan, he gets out of bed. the room seems colder somehow without you by his side. the cool wood floors grate against his bare feet as he pads down the hallway.

all the lights are turned off, except the ones in the kitchen. he finds you on your tiptoes, wobbling against the counter as you reach for your favourite mug. he's careful not to frighten you as his bare chest presses against your back and he reaches from behind to grab it.

he places it on the counter, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. "morning," he mumbles into your skin, nuzzling the crook of your neck.

"morning 'toru" you smiled, carding your fingers through the ivory strands tickling your chin. "what are you doing up?"

"i could ask you the same thing" satoru replied, punctuating his sentence by pressing soft kisses along the curve of your neck.

"i figured i'd make myself some coffee since i couldn't go back to sleep" you shifted around in his embrace so he could see your face better.

"is something wrong sweets?" he asks, cupping your cheeks in his hands. concern shone in his eyes, bright enough to rival the stars themselves.

"no" you shook your head, savouring the feeling of satoru’s thumb stroking circles into your cheekbones "'m just not tired"

"i'll stay up with you then" satoru hummed thoughtfully

"you shouldn't" you frowned, brushing his hair out of his infinitely blue eyes. his pupils are glazed with sleep, yet still held such tenderness and warmth "you'll be too tired for your meeting"

"'m not going for it anyways, i'd rather keep you company" he wants nothing more than to pull you into a kiss, but that could wait until you'd made your coffee. he pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead before releasing you from his grasp.

you sigh — a quiet exhale flowing from your parted lips as you went to pour your coffee. satoru follows your movements with his gaze. the smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the kitchen as you stirred almond milk and cubes of sugar into the steaming mug.

"want some?" you asked, you cupped your coffee in your hands. the warmth seeped through your fingers. "or i could make you some hot chocolate"

his infinitely blue eyes drank you in as you sipped on your coffe. in spite of your messy hair and the dark circles beneath your lashes, he found himself lost in the pure essence of your beauty. tired eyes transfixed by his shirt slipping off your shoulder and the sleeves hanging loosely on your elbows. he loved looking at you. it was without a doubt his favourite thing in the world.

"'toru?" the sweet sound of your voice eased him out of his trance. he shook his head as he moved to lean next to you. your brows are slightly furrowed and he places a kiss between them. a futile attempt to smooth the scrunched skin.

"'s nothing" he says, voice a mere whisper over the sound of the wall clock ticking and the crickets chirping outside. the lingering silence isn't uncomfortable, not when it's filled with you.

the way you tilt your head to look at him as he presses a lazy kiss to the corner of your mouth. satoru thinks he could stay like this forever. he's close enough to feel the warmth radiating off your body.

satoru wondered if you knew how much of a goner he was, if you realised how much you truly meant to him. you sipped on your coffee, oblivious to the way he watched every little movement you made. you were everything. his everything.

he'd never sleep again if it meant having your fingers carding through his hair. he'd never sleep again if it meant his hands could linger over your warm skin, imbued with the scent of coffee and your perfume, for eternity. he'd never sleep again if it meant having you with him.

"'m just in love with you" he admits, whispering the words as if they would break the earth's atmosphere. you smile, and it's brighter than any star satoru has ever gazed upon. he gently takes your mug from your grasp so he can wrap both arms around you without your coffee getting in the way.

"i know" you say softly, "i'm kinda in love with you too…"

"really?" he raises an eyebrow, grinning. satoru's gaze drops to your lips and his heart flutters in a way that's become familiar to him— and only him —after years of knowing and loving you.

"yes really" you stood on the utmost tips of your toes and leaned forward to press your lips to his. slow, gentle. it tastes exactly how he imagined it would— like sugary coffee and wisps of heaven; like home

it felt as if only the two of you were awake in the vast expanse of the universe. moonlight kissed the perfect canvas of your skin as your fingers trailed over the strong curves of his bare forearms.

the taste of coffee lingers on his lips as you pull away. satoru thinks that nothing compares to you. no one could hold a candle — no one could burn as bright.

he didn't know what his life would've been if he hadn't met you. you were his world, his soul. he wouldn't give you up for anything. not even his own freedom, because he knew without a shadow of doubt that you were it. he was never truly free until he met you

he knew he should drag you back to the comfort of your bed, to indulge in the luxury of holding you in his arms and lulling you back to sleep before the sun rises. but he selfishly wished to bask in your presence for a little while longer. to stay like this for eternity because he never knew when he'd lose the privilege of being with you.

© Y2KUROMI 2024. please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗛𝗬𝗣𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗦𝗜𝗦 : yuuta okkotsu x reader

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 synopsis: the thin line between being friends and lovers is one you thought yuuta would never cross, until he does

contents: no curse au. a smidge of angst. fluff! mutual pining. kissing (how scandalous) maki and toge play cupid. second person pov.

it's early spring, the sun had long since set and the cherry blossoms were in bloom. pale pink petals drifted on your window sill as you gazed out the misted glass.

you were trying to focus on the paragraphs about active sites and substrates in front of you. you'd read the same lines over and over again without absorbing anything. your heart simply wasn't in it. you wanted to talk to someone, not just anyone. your best friend.

if you could even call him that with how distant he'd been over the last few weeks. the two of you had known each other for as long as you could remember and had always been inseparable, but that wasn't the case recently

he was almost a stranger when you talked, barely acknowledging you or any of your actions and his responses to your messages seemed detached when he bothered to text you back

you glanced down at your lock screen. streams of messages varying from toge asking you to play fortnite with him to maki telling you about the gossip she'd heard from nobara. but nothing from yuuta.

you exhaled loudly as you tossed your phone onto your dresser. you missed him but you wouldn't push it. after all, you didn't even know why he'd suddenly fallen off your radar.

you flipped through your biology textbook absentmindedly, skimming over detailed diagrams of organ systems and leaf cells. the words seemed to float above your head and your thoughts circled back to yuuta.

did you do something? no. that wasn't it. if you did maki wouldn't have been able to keep it from you. your mind raced, trying to figure out what could've caused so much distance between the two of you you're so engrossed in your thoughts that you don't hear your door creaking open

"hey" a familiar voice makes you snap your gaze up to find yuuta standing in your doorway. you're startled, undeniably so and for a second you think you've conjured him up. you blink once. twice he's still there.

"i hope you don't mind me coming over, your mom let me in" yuuta rambled "do you have minute to talk?"

you know you should tell him you don't have a slither of time for him. you know you should tell him to get lost. but you don't. because somehow every single thought you have is drowned out by his dark blue eyes.

"sure, i've got a biology test tomorrow but it's just on enzymes and transport in animals so i can study later"

"great!" he grins, shutting the door behind him. he pads softly over to your bed and sits cross-legged beside you. his smile turns more sincere as his blue iris meet your (e/c) ones. he watches you intently and you feel slightly self conscious under his scrutiny.

it's shallow, but you wish you'd opted for studying in a more flattering outfit instead of an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants. it's stupid because yuuta doesn't seem to care about what you're wearing.

"what did you want to talk about?" you asked, closing your textbook and setting it down on your bedside table. a sick twisted part of you hoped he wanted to talk about the two of you.

it wouldn't happen, there was a line between what was left of your friendship and anything more that you and yuuta would simply never cross. you knew that. so you didn't understand why the words he uttered next had your heart shattering into tiny fragments.

"i've got a date tonight" he fiddled with the hem of his shirt as he spoke, blissfully unaware of how the words ate you alive. of how they chewed you up into a pulp and spat you out ruthlessly.

your smile faltered briefly, it was barely noticeable — you were quick to mask it with a wobbly grin. your throat suddenly felt incredibly dry as your gaze dropped to your hands. they were balled into fists as you dug crescents into the soft flesh of your palms.

"i asked this girl in my geography class out, you don't have any classes together so i'm not sure you know her...." he says, raking a hand through his dark hair. his voice sounded distant. as if someone else was speaking for him. like he wasn't really there

maybe you really were dreaming. you had to be. yuuta wouldn't do this to you, he couldn't be that cruel. you knew that. yuuta would never hurt you. you were his best friend, he loved you. his love was pure and blameless. it was anything but cruel ( it was everything but romantic )

"....she's really nice, i think you two would be good friends" he beams. it was slowly sinking in that he really had a date — a date with someone else. a date with someone who wasn't you. it stung.

you couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy tugging at your heart strings. the twisted feeling was closely followed by one of guilt. it wasn't right to be jealous. you were just friends. that's all you'd ever been.

"i'm really happy for you" you say, the words dripped from your tongue slowly, deliberately — drenched in false sweetness and blind loyalty. he deserved to be happy , you just selfishly wished it was with you

"thank you" he says softly, dark azure blue eyes sparkling. the expression on his face was so warm. so familiar. you wanted to reach across and take his hand. to hold it tightly. to keep him close to you so he wouldn't leave again. but he wasn't yours. and you were sure he never would be.

"so...why are you here? shouldn't you be getting ready for your date?" the questions came out harsher than intended, but yuuta wasn't fazed. he's oblivious to the bitterness in your tone, he's oblivious to your feelings.

"i need your help" he admits sheepishly, "i've never been on a date before so i thought you could teach me the basics" the confession brings a slight flush to his cheeks and his fingers tap nervously against his knees.

you blinked once, twice and then shook your head lightly. you'd waited so long for him to notice your feelings. and now he was asking you for advice?

the universe was cruel. undeniably so. it seemed to be laughing at you. mocking you for thinking your best friend could ever view you in such a light even if you only dreamed about it subconsciously.

"let me get this straight" you sighed, rubbing your temples " you want me to teach you how to go on a date?" yuuta nodded earnestly, a small pink tint creeping across his cheeks

"yes please" he was so cute. so perfect. you couldn't say no to him. even though he hadn't spoken to you properly in weeks. you wouldn't say no to him. not now, not ever.

"there isn't much to say in all honesty, it'll come naturally to you so just be yourself. you're a really sweet guy yuuta, any girl would be lucky to have you" you felt tears prickling at the back of your eyes

you weren't lucky. you were absolutely, unequivocally, cursed.

"what if she wants me to kiss her? i've never kissed anyone before i'm kind of nervous about it" he said shyly, his cheeks reddened with embarrassment as he stared intently at your covers.

"i doubt it'll come to that" you murmured, "you don't have to kiss on the first date, it's better to take things slow"

"have you ever kissed someone on the first date?" yuuta asked curiously.

"that's a bit of a personal question isn't it?" you mused, "but i have" you reflected on the clumsy clashing of lips and wandering hands you'd experienced after mediocre first dates. nothing worth writing home about.

there were no sparks flying, no currents coursing through your veins. just unfeeling touches as you tried to find someone, anyone to fill the void. but they were never anything special. they weren't yuuta.

"can you teach me?" the question caught you off guard. he was staring right at you, those deep blue eyes searching your soul.he seemed nervous, unsure of himself.

"what?" you resisted the temptation to gulp audibly

"can you teach me how to kiss ?" he asks slowly, pronouncing each syllable carefully. like he was testing the waters to see how far he could get.

"kissing isn't something i can teach, it's just something you figure out besides how would i even go about teaching you how to kiss?" you rambled, wringing your hands in your lap.

"you could kiss me" yuuta suggested with a bright, hopeful grin, he held your gaze with unwavering intensity. his voice was unusually steady and clear.

"i can't do that" you splutter. the words tasted bitter on your tongue. yuuta's face falls and he's quick to avert his gaze.

"why not?" he sounds genuinely perplexed. it was a good idea, a great idea even. he didn't understand why you were so adamant about saying no.

"because, we're friends" you say the words through gritted teeth "and i'm not going to kiss you when you're going out with another girl. it's not fair to her" and it especially wasn't fair to you.

not when he'd ignored you for days— not when you were hopelessly in love with him.

yuuta stared blankly at you, brows furrowed in confusion as the words processed slowly in his head. you watched him, gnawing at your bottom lip. this sucked more than being ghosted. you wanted to cry. to scream. to do anything but deal with this.

"you should go yuuta" you said quietly, "you're going to be late for your date" you forced a smile which only served to make him frown even more.

"are you upset with me?" he asked anxiously. this wasn't supposed to happen. if maki's hypothesis was right, pretending he had a date tonight should've result in you blurting out a confession and ending this stalemate "i'm sorry"

"don't apologise" you sighed, "i'm not upset....maybe a little, i just think you should get going. it's rude to keep your date waiting"

maki's hypothesis was wrong. so wrong. he'd gotten his hopes up for nothing. it had taken him time to process his feelings for you, and he'd gone about it in confusing ways. this was a last ditch effort to fix things. and it was a bust.

he could see your friendship — his whole world — falling apart because of him.

he wasn't sure how to tell you that you consumed his thoughts wholly. that you were the first and last thing he thought of every day. that he couldn't envision a future without you. he was trapped by his feelings for you and he selfishly prayed the truth would set him free.

"there isn't one" he admits, " there's no date.. i lied so you would kiss me" his gaze met yours again, you blinked owlishly. none of this made any sense.

"you wanted me to kiss you?" you repeated incredulously. "why would you want that?"

"i don't know if you ever noticed but i'm in love with you" he says firmly, a serious look etched onto his features. your lips parted slightly, and your breath caught in your throat. "i needed time to process how i felt and being around you made that too difficult"

you sat in silence for a moment, trying to process what he'd just said. yuuta okkotsu was in love with you. not the girl from his geography class that he'd conjured up. you. you didn't expect to hear these words coming from him. never in a million years.

"i understand if you don't feel the same way. it's selfish of me to say such things after being so cold to you and i'm sorry i lied" his words crashed into each other," not that it changes anything it was maki's idea. i asked her if i had a chance and she told me this would answer my question—"

"why would you listen to maki?" you interrupted, bewildered. he shrugged, it had seemed reasonable at the time. though he should've been able to tell she had something up her sleeve from the glint in her gold flecked eyes.

"she knows you better than anyone and i was desperate because toge told me someone asked you out after school today and i was going to lose you if i didn't do something quickly" he confessed, running his fingers through his dark hair

"you've always had me" you said softly, this sweet, caring, innocent, adorable soul, had no idea how much you liked him. and it was the most obvious thing in the universe.

he lets out a breath he wasn't even aware he was holding. relief floods over his pale skin, the smile on his face is so wide it looks almost painful. "that's a relief"

"you had me fooled" you laughed, "maki'll thank you later, i was a few moments away from calling her in tears" it's a bit embarrassing to admit out loud, but honesty seemed to be the theme with both of you tonight.

"you care that much about me?" he asks hesitantly. it's almost impossible for him to believe it. you'd both placed each other on a pedestal, thinking that you weren't good enough for the other. but sharing the mutual understanding that you were better together

falling in love with your best friend was no longer deemed an unfortunate curse but a blessing "you don't know the half of it" you admitted, brushing his hair away from his eyes.

the lines between friends, and what you are now are blurred mosaic tiles that cloud your vision. yet all you can see is yuuta. he's yours. wholly. his beautiful smile and his kind heart, every inch of him.

the sound of his heartbeat filled every single inch of your brain. it drowned out the obnoxious ticking of your pochacco alarm clock, it drowned out the chiming of your phone — probably with texts from maki and toge — it drowned out the giddy feeling in your stomach as his blue eyes lingered on your lips

"can i get that kiss now?" he asks shamelessly. you can feel your heart hammering as his hands brush against yours. you nod silently.

you could feel yourself drowning in the oceanic pull of his eyes. the tides are threatening to pull you under. but yuuta is holding your hand and pulling you impossibly close to him until your noses brushed against each other softly and you could smell the spearmint and cherry blossoms lingering on him

you're not sure who closes the gap as your lips ghost over each others. it's tentative and hesitant but it feels right. he tasted like love, in every sense of the word.

he was different from the boys you'd gone on dates with. yuuta kissed you gently, with feeling. he kissed you like he meant it. that's all it took to make fireworks explode inside your chest. that's all it took to make you fall in love with him all over again

© Y2KUROMI 2024. please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ 𝗖𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗥𝗬 𝗙𝗟𝗔𝗩𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗘𝗗: yuuji itadori x fem! reader

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 synopsis: yuuji swears he’s not biased and he likes all his presents equally, but your kisses just happen to be his favourite ones

contents: fluff fluff fluff! yuuji being absolutely whipped, happy birthday to the best boy ever ( gege free my baby :c )

yuuji’s birthday was supposed to be about him. yet he found himself consumed by his feelings for you.

the skirt to your dress was brushing against your thighs and the shoulder you were showing had him transfixed for longer than it should have.it was just his birthday, why did you have to look so…beautiful.

he’d never thought of someone this much, so many adjectives sprung to his head when he thought of you. you contaminated his thoughts, you were the first and last thing he thought of every day.

that’s why he was fixing you a drink, before making his, because the ingredients for your favourite drink happened to be nearly gone

“here you go” he said holding out a cup to you. your fingers brushed slightly against his as you thanked him and took it from him with a smile. he found himself quickly returning it, butterflies fluttering in his stomach from the contact, before he raised his own drink to his lips, he made a confused face at the unfamiliar taste on his tongue

“different from your usual?” you asked, cocking your head slightly, yuuji realised his mistake.

“i mixed them up, this one’s supposed to be for you, that one’s mine” he prepared himself to walk away and get you another cup, when hands much smaller than his own pried the cup from his hands.

“i figured” you said giggling, lifting the cup you had stolen from him to your lips and handing him the correct one. he watched as you took a slow, unsure sip, and smile at the familiar taste on your tongue, “thank you yuuji”

he could only manage a nod as he raised his own cup towards his mouth, fighting another grimace as he found it too bland and boring now. he craved the sweet, but unfamiliar taste that had once been on his tongue, and wondered if he kissed you — right here, right now — it would taste like your sweet drink. he let himself imagine for a minute, pressing his lips to yours, catching your cheek in his hand, tilting your head back and deepening it,

“let’s go dance” you said excitedly, pulling him from his selfish thoughts, he flushed with embarrassment, hating himself for thinking of you like that. you were holding your hand out to him, “c’mon ‘yuu, i want to be the first to dance with the birthday boy”

“okay” he found himself saying — ignoring the small voice in his head that remind him that he couldn’t dance and he hated it — and following you to the middle of the classroom

satoru had thrown a small party with nobara, megumi, the second years and the sorcerers from kyoto jujutsu high. he’d gotten so many presents he’d nearly lost count — his favourite had to be the human earthworm plush wrapped in pink ribbons (fushiguro had filled him in on your conquest at the arcade a few days prior)

yuuji thought dancing with you was painfully unfair, he was allowed to put his hand on your hip, to draw you closer, to feel your chest brush against his for a second, but you were always twirling away.

“you’re really good at dancing,” you said, placing a hand on his shoulder. he finally had you in his arms again, “though you’re too stiff, relax yuuji, dancing is about having fun!”

“okay”, why couldn’t he say anything else? why couldn’t he think of something better to say? he was usually talkative.

now you were quiet, although still smiling. he found himself looking into your eyes. you caught the corner of your lip between your teeth, and he found himself mimicking the action like a ventriloquist dummy.

you slowly twirled for a few minutes. yuuji was focusing on dancing to the rhythm of the music, trying to put himself at ease, he was sure he would short circuit if he thought for a second longer.

“see? you’re much more relaxed” you’re impossibly close to him, so close he can smell the warmth of your perfume. he shivered the butterflies in his stomach returning again, he swore he could feel them flying up to his lungs,

“right” he tried to come off as nonchalant, but he knew you could see through it. you could always see right through it.

he expected you to call him out on his act, like you always did, wanting him to be the real, unfiltered version of himself. but instead you only smiled and pulled yourself closer to him. he suppressed a groan, christ. were you trying to kill him?

you were tilting your chin up, he was bending his kneck down, you wanted this as much as he did right? shit he hoped so. your eyes were closing and so were his. your bottom lip brushed against his upper lip, and he fought a shiver forcing its way up his chest

“hey— oh” damn it kugisaki, yuuji could just kill her right now.

he listened as you laughed and talked, trying to calm the seething rage that was bubbling in his chest. you had stepped away, still close to him, keeping him in place with your hand placed on his forearm

“hey idiot, we need you to come cut your cake” yuuji found it in himself to look up at nobara, to act as if he had been listening, and not thinking of all the possible ways to make her pay for ripping away his best chance to fulfill his fantasies and selfish desires, “you coming?” and shit, just like that, he had to leave, and he was never going to—

“maybe in a bit, yuuji and i were just about to get something to eat” then you were smiling and dragging him along. the fairy lights around him blurred, strung in multitudes but none compared to you. they were all so dull and insignificant compared to the beauty you radiated

you brought him to a secluded area, before turning around suddenly. his breathing hitched at the frustration, clear as day written all over your face. he wanted to reach forward to do whatever he could to make that look go away.

but who the hell was he to think he had the right to touch you in anyway. plus you were obviously mad at him. chasing this stupid fantasy wasn’t going to get him anywhere. he needed to stop.

“you always look at me like you want to kiss me, so why don’t you just do it?!” yuuji was taken aback by your words, he didn’t think it was that obvious. he wrapped his arms around his body, hugging himself, trying to subdue how shaky and nerve racked he was

it was no use denying anything. he didn’t want to lie to you especially after coming so close to kissing you moments before, “i didn’t want to assume anything” honesty dripped off his tongue like honey

“assume all you want” you said, taking a step closer to him. his eyes widened and he instinctively took a step back.

“what are you talking about” he said, upset that he finally had your permission and he was taking this the wrong way.

“yuuji” you said softly, your eyes searching his. you took a step closer and placed your hand gently on his chest. you could feel his heart beating against your fingers, you could tell he was nervous. he felt like he couldn’t breathe, “i like you too”

he watched with half lidded eyes as you entwined your arms around his neck slowly, he found his arms making their way to your hip and the small of your back. he really didn’t want you to move away from him, it would just break him. he really didn’t want to be wrong.

he really wanted to kiss the breath out of you, to claim you as his in every way, shape and form. he had an impossibly long list of things he wanted to show you. he wanted to give you the world. no he wanted to give you his world. but he had to be sure. he couldn’t risk losing you over a stupid selfish crush

“yuuji you can kiss me” you said, the words rang through his ears as clear as day. you were close enough that he felt the words before he heard them

before he could even think, he moved the hand from your hip to her cheek and pulled you closer, tipping your head back and crashing his lips against yours.yuuji had always sworn to himself, that if he ever got the chance to kiss you, he would be gentle. he would take his time. but he didn’t have the energy to restrain himself, and found himself groaning into the kiss, kissing you with a bruising force.

he swallowed your sighs as he moved his tongue against yours, feeling as though he would never tire of the taste of you, whether it was the taste of your lipgloss and drink combined,he didn’t care, he loved it.

you pulled away, much too soon for yuuji and pressed your forehead against his, breathing heavily. a few moments later you leaned forward to press a series of short kisses onto the corner of his mouth.

while he had thought about it before, this was the moment for certain that yuuji knew that he was yours. he would take anything you would give him and give you his all.

being a jujutsu sorcerer made him think being in love would make him vulnerable, that the curse users would have something to use against him,but right now, with your mouth reaching towards his again, he was sure he could take on the king of curses himself

© Y2KUROMI 2024. please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

[y2kuromi]

⭑ : 呪術廻戦 ❛ 𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗡 𝗜𝗧 𝗥𝗔𝗜𝗡𝗦, 𝗜𝗧 𝗣𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗦 : gojo x reader

࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 synopsis: satoru shows up to your apartment , drunk and drenched from the rain after the shinjuku incident ( dec 24 2017 )

contents: angst, fluff, fix it fic for the shinjuku incident. nudity kinda. he calls reader ‘baby’ , writing for gojo feels like writing a love letter (this was supposed to be a drabble i hate him)

it’s raining. constant precipitation trails down your windows, the sickly scent of petrichor slithers through curtains , and your ex boyfriend is standing outside your door. illuminated by the moonlight glinting off the railings and casting shadows on your front door. ( on christmas eve nonetheless)

for a minute you do nothing but observe him. his once bright blue eyes reduced to a dull dark blue that rivals the insipidity of polluted oceans. his hair dishevelled, the thick band of his blindfold strung within the messy strands, and his bottom lip trembling as he barely managed to stand

“what are you doing here?” it comes out bristly shades colder than intended. you feel a prickly sense of regret as you watch hurt flash through his eyes.

it however, was a valid question. he didn’t get to show up to your house after two weeks of radio silence. two weeks, of sleeping alone in your bed. fourteen days of instinctively making two cups of coffee, only for one to go cold and untouched. three hundred and sixty hours of wondering aimlessly if he would come back this time.

and now he was here. covered in rain and full of soju, and sorrow. you know something’s happened. you know he needs you to put the pieces back together.

“gojo” you prompt, arms folded across your chest. he looks at you. he really looks at you. and you feel the hurt and anger — the grudge, you were so adamant about holding — ebbing away into nothing

he’s drenched —and drunk. and vulnerable — rain drops cling to his hair, his clothes. you frown. something was wrong. the rain shouldn’t be able to reach him, not when he had infinity.

( unbeknownst to you , he let the rain wash away his sins, he let the precipitation drown him mercilessly to wash away the blood on his hands )

his heart aches in his chest. the words weigh heavy on his tongue — he came to you because he didn’t know where else to go, he came to you because he needs you

it’s his curse. his utter codependency and reliance on you (and your love). it’s a pain, being the strongest yet being absolutely weak for you.

“i missed you” is all he says. and you’re taken aback by how unabashedly raw he sounds. his voice is shaky, drenched with tremors that could break the ritcher’s scale.

you contemplate turning him away. for leaving you, and having the nerve to darken your doorstep. but you don’t have a mean bone in your body. you can’t leave him like this. drunk, alone. there’s no telling what he’d do. so you swallowed your bitter feelings and invited him in.

“do you want to come inside?” it’s a rhetorical question, you both know the answer is yes. satoru nods. he makes to step over the welcome mat, tripping over his feet in the process and staggering towards you.

you reach out instinctively before he tumbles headfirst through the doorway— it’s quick. too quick for him to register, the arm supporting him, your palm pressed gently to his bicep.

“such a klutz” you murmur, but you don’t let go of his arm. instead you lead him carefully through the doorway. into your apartment (into your heart again)

it’s the same as it always is. the way it always has been. the carpet is still fluffy and neatly hoovered. the polaroids of both of you still hang by the tv. your cat still slinks past him, hisses of disapproval directed towards him— he’d always hated that cat — it’s as if he never left.

you make your way to the living room — with satoru in tow, ankles bumping against the coffee table as you set him down on the couch. he slumps against the crotchet knit pillows. he’s feverish and barely conscious , but he’s home.

you’re so, so close, that he’s engulfed in your scent —warm vanilla tinged with hues of petrichor — your touch, that he’s craved for nights on end, your warmth, everything. it’s overwhelming

in the midst of his feverish consciousness, you’re all his brain can bear to think about. with the alcohol coursing through his veins, and the painfully vivid images of his best friend, of blood — on his hands flashing through his mind. all he wants is to be consumed wholly by you

“i’m going to get you some water” you say, “don’t fall asleep on me yet, you’re too intoxicated”

“‘m not drunk” he’s lying through his teeth. a feeble attempt to keep you within his reach. ‘don’t leave me’ he wants to say. he can’t be alone with his thoughts. not now. not ever

“you couldn’t even walk in a straight line” you mutter, “god knows how you got here safely in the first place”

“i warped here” he slurs, and he has the nerve to sound proud of himself. he has the nerve to be pleased with the fondness flickering in your eyes before you mask it with frustration

“typical” you said, pinching the bridge of your nose exasperatedly, “just stay here, i need to get you sobered up”

he doesn’t argue with you, rather, he lets you trail to the kitchen and return with a misty glass of cold water. you don’t have to, and he doesn’t deserve it — but you hold the glass to his slightly parted lips and tilt it backwards.

you don’t have to, and he doesn’t deserve it but you’re gentle. so, so gentle as if he’s fragile, made from brittle panes of glass. you treat him as if he’s merely human,

“thank you” he says, and the words hold more meaning than the universe itself. his eyes have a little more light, but they don’t hold a candle to the bright blue they once were

you set the empty glass down on the coffee table, a ring of condensation forming on the sheer wood. you’d typically never put glass down without a coaster, but satoru had that effect on you. he’d make you forget about mundane things like keeping your coffee table pristine, all you could think about was him

“you should’ve gone to shoko’s” you sighed, “or nanami’s”

“didn’t want to” he shrugs, “they’re not you”

“that’s exactly my point gojo” you exhaled. you knew he wouldn’t see reason. you knew it was pointless to remind him that he’d been the one to end things, that you were no longer his. “you’re getting water all over my couch”

“our couch” he says. and it’s true, in retrospect. you’d bought it together. you’d done so much together

it’s silent. save for the wall clock ticking and sound of your cat clawing at her catpost. it’s silent save for satoru’s shallow breathing and the ubiquitous thumping of your hearts.

satoru aches for you to hold him, for you to act as if he’d never left. he wished he hadn’t now, watching you sit as far as possible away from him on the couch. watching your hands clench into fists in your lap.

“what’s wrong?” you asked finally. he can’t tell you. yet he knows that his heart will stop beating, and he’ll cease to exist if he doesn’t.

“a lot” it’s vague, but it’s something. it’s typically all or nothing with him, he just needs time. that’s all he wants. he hasn’t even processed what he’s done yet

his hand inches closer to yours. he’s begging silently. to feel you again, and he knows he’s asking for too much.

“i’m running you a bath” you said, and it hurts to reject him. it physically hurts to recoil and edge away from the couch. “then you’re going tell me what happened”

“okay” he nods. satoru hates being told what to do, but not when it’s you dictating. he would do anything for you. so he trailed after you.

he clumsily stumbled through the hallways he knew like the back of his hand, blindly following you as if you were the only thing that could make him move forward.

your shared bathroom was empty without his stuff cluttering up the sink. without his towel hung up beside yours. without his toothbrush mingling with yours on the counter. without his three-in-one soap sitting beside your vast collection in the bathtub. without him.

silence hung between you. the water trickling into the tub became the only background noise. he leaned weakly against the sink, watching you lean over the tub, hands experimentally treading water

“i’m still mad at you” you said, your back was turned to him but he knew you were. you had every right to be. “so mad”

“i know baby, ‘m sorry” you didn’t need to look at him for sincerity, he did sound sorry. “i really am, i was gonna get you flowers, but-”

“i don’t want flowers, i want you to be honest with me”

you dipped your fingers into the water to make sure it wasn't too hot. you still remembered how picky he was about things like this. he liked his water warm enough to sting, but not enough to burn. he liked a lot of things that way

“get in” you said, stepping away from the the tub and wiping your damp fingers down on your joggers. you avert your gaze as satoru shrugs off his clothes. your eyes flicker over the cracks in the walls as he sheds the layers of pain that anchored him to the ground

“no need to look away” he murmured “‘s nothing you haven’t seen before” that much was true. you’d seen satoru at his absolute worst (when he was weak on nights like this), you’d seen him at his best (when he was “the strongest”)

“you’re unbelievable” you spluttered. you felt heat rise to your cheeks. it was suddenly too humid in your shared bathroom. the tiled walls felt like they were closing in and satoru was too close to you.

you didn’t even realise you were backing towards the door, slowly drifting impossibly further away from him, until you felt him reach desperately for you.

“don’t go, please” it’s hard to stay mad at him. you can’t. not when you can feel his hand trembling on your wrist. not when his voice cracks and fades into nothing. not when he needs you

you didn’t grace him with a response, instead you slumped weakly against the door and watched him slip into the steaming tub. you don't mention the fact he's using your things, lathering your precious soap onto his tainted skin.

he scrubs roughly until his skin is pink and his fingers are pruney. he scrubs until he can no longer feel the throbbing pain in his chest.

"want me to wash your hair for you?" you asked after he finished washing himself. he nodded, he just wanted you to touch him. he needed you to touch him. even if it was just this — even it it was only this.

you sat on the edge of the bathtub tentatively then you poured the shampoo gently into his hair and began to move your fingers softly through his snowy curls, trying your best not to hurt him. his hair was surprisingly knot-free for once. he shivers slightly as your fingers smooth over his undercut.

he lets your fingers comb through his hair until it’s a bright white again and no longer carries hints of petrichor and alcohol

"don't fall asleep" you murmured, as you noticed his ivory lashes fluttering against his rosy cheeks. he shot you a half hearted smile. you washed the soap suds out of his hair — carefully, to ensure you didn’t get soap into his beautiful eyes

satoru felt wholly at peace. your hand ghosted tenderly across his face as you wiped at the suds that lingered on his cheeks. it felt good to be this close to you. to be completely exposed for your eyes only.

“i love you” he murmurs sleepily. he presses a nervous kiss to your wrist and he’s surprised to find that you don’t flinch away

he’s not surprised that you don’t say it back. asking you to love him — when he’s such a wreck, when all he seems to do is cause you pain — is nothing but mere entitlement.

he doesn’t deserve it. he knows he doesn’t. yet he craves your love the way the moon craves the sun. the way the plants crave water. he craves your love because it’s the only thing that will keep him going. so he whispers the words like a mantra

his lips tremble against your skin as he presses soft kisses and i love yous to the bone on your wrist.

“coffee or tea?” is all you say in response. but you don’t pull away. he doesn’t need his six eyes to tell him that your resolve is weakening.

“coffee” he says. you wordlessly hand him a towel. it’s yours. fluffy and probably fresh out the laundry basket. it smells soft and nostalgic. your fingers brush against his briefly. it’s still there — the spark that dances on your fingertips, the spark that brings him back to life

“you left some clothes in the closet” you sigh, “get dressed and come to the kitchen. i would make you something to eat, but i haven’t gone grocery shopping yet”

“d’you have any sweets?” he has the audacity to ask. it’s worth seeing a smile tug at the corner of your lips as you stand in the doorway.

“you and your sweet tooth” you muttered, but you shook your head fondly, “i’ll see if i can find anything”

when satoru trudges into the kitchen, his hair is still damp, droplets trickle down his neck and a towel is draped around his shoulders. he finds you perched on a stool by the kitchen island sipping languidly on what he assumes to be hot chocolate

the counter is empty, save for the bowl of ceramic fruits you kept as a centrepiece and his mug of coffee —black with infinite granules of sickly sweet sugar— just the way he likes it. it’s hot, wisps of smoke blow onto his face but it’s perfect.

“‘toru ” you said, all traces of bitterness erased from your voice, “what are you really doing here?”

his throat is dry. so dry. and the words weigh heavy on his tongue. but he has to tell you. he owes you that much at least.

“i killed someone” he says. the lack of emotion in his voice doesn’t phase you. it’s the tears brimming in his eyes that have you worried.

“who did you kill?” you ask. whoever it was, you could take it. you would shoulder the world of pain that weighed him down. you would stop him from drowning in his emotions. you have to. after all, he is your fatal flaw, your achilles heel — your everything

“suguru” it physically hurts to hear his breath hitch and his voice catch over the three syllables. it hurts to watch the tears fall from his dull blue eyes. it hurts to watch his fingers tremble around his coffee. it hurts to watch him break

sitting beside you, satoru isn’t the strongest jujutsu sorcerer ; he isn’t the honoured one — he’s weak. he’s broken. he clenches the bruised pieces of his heart in his palms. a cardiac puzzle for you to put together. but you don’t know where to start.

there are too many pieces. too many words swarming in your head. too many tears falling from his cerulean eyes. too many days apart. it’s complicated — this soulful relationship you have with him, it’s hot and cold usually but it’s blazing now.

“toru” you don’t know what else to say. there aren’t enough words to wrap around him. not enough words to soothe him. you couldn’t tell him that everything was going to be okay. you couldn’t lie to him. so you said the only thing you knew he wanted to hear, “i love you”

“i’m a murderer” he says, he thinks it’s true. you can’t possibly love him. you shouldn’t. he’s not a good person. he doesn’t deserve it. “you shouldn’t have let me in”

“but i did” your hands inch towards his, to no avail

it's subtle but you feel it, pressing softly against you — his cursed energy protecting his entire being. an invisible wall between you. a gap that you can't close. infinity

"you're using infinity" you point out. the words feel foreign on your tongue. infinity wasn't supposed to exist when it came to you. it hurts to see him avoid your gaze. it hurts to see him recoil. you're both hurting now. and it's the last thing he wants, “you don’t have to, it’s just me”

“sorry” he exhales, you feel the wall between you crumble. it comes crashing down like the vast ocean waves on sturdy sea rocks.

“don’t be” your fingers graze his softly and you loop your pinkie with his. it's small. underwhelming. you're giving him an out in case it's too much. in case he can't take this, but he doesn't move. “we don’t have to talk about it, we can just go to sleep and pretend it didn’t happen”

“i’m sick of pretending” he mutters. his eyes are glued to the marbled countertop. they ghost over the swirls until he feels dizzy. “it’s my fault, if i had been strong enough back then-”

“you didn’t fail him, you didn’t fail anyone” you squeeze his hand gently, grounding him. “it’s never been your fault, haibara wasn’t your fault and suguru wasn’t your fault either, blame the higher ups for being incompetent”

“i was incompetent too” he reminds you. he’s clinging to the past and he’s haunted by its ghosts.

“you were also a child” you said, “we were kids ‘toru, and as much as we want to, we can’t change the past”

“the future doesn’t look any brighter” he laughs, it’s cold and bitter. devoid of any positive emotions, and for a split second you think he might be spiralling down the path suguru took all those years ago.

satoru dreamt of a perfect world where jujutsu sorcerers protect the weak like they were destined to. it’s all he’d ever talked about. it looks like his dreams had been crushed into dust and scattered across the ground for the wind to carry away

“the future isn’t always bright, but it’s ours” you mumble softly. “if you need someone to talk to i’ll always be here for you, no matter what happens”

and that’s all satoru needs to hear right now. a reminder of why things turn out the way they do. a reminder that you’ll always find your way back to each other.

even when the future looks dark and gloomy you’d always belong together. like two peas in a pod, like two starcrossed lovers, after all — tragedy is what binds you together

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