#{ive also forgotten who made it but meh}

[thebadtimewolf]

uh anyways i'll leave the toxic tenrose tag when yall leave the martha jones or tenmartha or the bear, the sleep hollow, the flash the selfie (because ive seen that shit there too) tags alone, how about that?

just a reminder: the tardis didnt take ten and martha to joan crawford, seventh doctor did by default for the chameleon circuit on a whim. because even joan said it! THE RACIST WOMAN CALLED HIM OUT ON THAT TO HIS FACE!

its the only two parter where its literally in your face that it was the DOCTOR that put MARTHA in that situation, not the tardis.

because just like falling in love never occurred to him, so was this entire scenario.

he fell in love with the same racist twice out of fobwatch familiarity and the only reason she didnt notice was because seven landed in april 1914 and ten in november 1913 - a whole year earlier

after all time and time and time again, the doctor lands somewhere with the pre-set location to avoid his past and future selves

but its even established by HIM that he is taking martha to places that he has already went to with people before her. not the tardis: himself.

so dont dance around about s3 ten's actions just because you happen to think of how he treated martha is blown out of proportion when it isn't. At all. BY HIS OWN ADMISSION mind you. "I traveled with Martha, I ruined her life" WHATS NOT CLICKING????

he couldve set it to modern-day by evidence of where he took martha because that shakespeare ep? His rolling of the eyes? HES ALREADY WENT THERE WITH ROSE AS NINE BUT SHAKESPEARE WAS OLDER and was contantly attempting to physically assault rose Meanwhile Shakespeare younger not doing that? Keeping his hands to himself? Flirting with both of them?! Yeah, no that 'dr didnt take them there, the tardis did' ALWAYS FALL FLAT WITH S3 BECAUSE TEN LITERALLY ADMITS HES TAKING HER TO PREVIOUS LOCATIONS MULTIPLE TIMES. the tardis only did that with lazerus, 42, blink, the utopia three parter (utopia, sound of drums, last of the time lords) and THATS IT but even in the first ep of season 3, ten showed he can pilot it with ease like a snap of his fingers. He can go exactly where he want to go. She didnt give him a time, she said this morning and he guessed. The whole point of season 3 is to show why tenrose doesnt work if the direct separation of you and her is being just as an excuse to be a dick AND RUNAWAYBRIDE?? BEING THE FIRST ONE BEFORE SEASON 3? he was mourning rose but it was CHOICE TO FLIRT TO ACTIVELY SHOW ATTRACTION TO ACTIVELY BE A DICK by his own admission. despite still showing attraction to martha the whole run. the entire run. the reason he yelled the reason he put that arms length was never because of rose. twice. THRICE SINCE 12 PUNCHED THAT GUY BECAUSE HE KNEW BILL'S CONCERNS WAS THE SAME AS MARTHAS BUT HE TOOK BETTER CARE OF IT THAN TEN.

THATS WHY NONE OF THE LATER INCARNATIONS OF 12 AND 13 LIKE 10 AT ALL. 13 constantly avoiding saying roses name by new writers - yeah no shit. Its tens fault why we dont actually have a 13rose. Hell, 11 made fun of him to his face and we chalked it up as them being lads.

its because ten is a hoe. why else do you think he was fine with just giving rose a human him? thats essentially a sentient body pillow of a hand that can give you kids. if you like. because that man was always for the streets unless rose locked that human him down quickly QUICKLY.

my god yall really out here fighting for dust of a ship. tenrose is dust. ninerose gave us FOOD. FOOD AND WATER.

ten took away yall one arguement with rose: oh shes poor thats he loves her. NO SHES NOT. SHES RICH. SHE BECAME A DAUGHTER OF A MULTIBILLIONAIRE AT THE END. SHE IS THE RICH.

SHE WOULDVE JOINED ON THAT STUPID SUBMARINE BECAUSE SHE HEARD THE TARDIS WAS RUMORED YO BE DOWN THERE AND THEN DIED WHAT IS NOT COMPUTING WITH YALL WITH THE TENROSE SHIP

did we all not watch turn left after realizing rose is rich? that she got the torchwood job on petes world because her new daddy owned it? like jackie works there? what is she doing? what is her job there quickly quickly i need to see makkari levels of speed here for the those receipts besides 'oh theyre the owners wife daughter and the guy that looks like the other guy that spedrun the invasion by his presence alone so give them what they want to shut them up' go GO

even the tech. mirror tech. thats just oceangate predetermined cmon. rose is rich now. because i know they made more dimension cannons because jackie AND MICKEY had one too but rose CHOSE TO LET A NOW POORER THAT S1 ROSE DONNA TO GET HIT BY A TRUCK and she let sarah jane amd ianto die???? girl gtfo AND THEN TEN PROCEED TO GIVE HER CRUMBS LIKE HE ALWAYS DID WHEN SHE CAME BACK.

sick. sick thats what tenth dr is. sick. and now 14s gonna be like: 😤 i miss yaz *mopes about yaz* and yall are gonna be like: no he should only mope about rose im not racist but he should only mope for rose even those thats still racism but its not bec—

giving the exact energy as billie piper's second ex-husband. gtfo

and by the way gifmakers that also act like this in every interracial ship that directly counters your umpteenth yt hetero ship that ive seen in literally every era since silent pictures: the correlation of those that ship it just as toxic as you to the point of sending you anon hate if you gif anything outside of that and the ones who are bluntly stealing your gifs and reposting as their own on the likes of twitter with no credit IS THE SAME MOTHERFUCKERS YOU ARE TRYING TO GET REBLOGS FROM. THE SAME ONES. THE SAME ONES THAT WILL NOT ASK IF THEY CAN USE SAID GIFS AND VIDEO (if you are a video editor). THE SAME ONES THAT ARE TWO FACED. do you know how many i had to stop reblogging from because the one who stole it ruined it because it was very clearly that they became racist like that was the natural next step? and weirdly - very weirdly for half of said gifmakers - are swifties. its fucking weird that they are also swifties and racist (hey like 🤬the triple k🤬) and certain type of gifmakers and steal from other creators without permission.

anyway. what was i saying? oh, yeah.

sit the fuck down. shut up. and actively try actually try to make an season 3 ten arguement without sounding like you are racist (just like yall always are with interracial relationships where part of the ship is a yt fave x poc) and failing bad at not being so.

yall been like this since 2010. it has not changed. "i can do better, i can redeem myself by learning to be better" you did worse. the goal was to not do worse. you did the complete opposite and did worse as soon as the metal walls creaked inward. and just like the boy who didnt want to be there and getting killed anyway, so is half of those that defend you completely within the dark that you put them in. just like your ship feed you dust and crumbs, so too you do onto those that stand beside you.

christopher eccleston is right, as always, - it should only be ninerose.

*me continuing to beat up tenth doctor with a cricket bat while an anon is going to think this whole post is about rose just absolve tenth doctor of the blame he is rightfully owed in season 3*

[exiledelle]

so ever since i saw undertale yellows merciless route, ive been having a thought about it:

which is also helped by me having had a big interest in undertale aus back in the day dfhjkg

UNDERTALE YELLOW MERCILESS SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

what would happen afterward in that timeline? what happens to the underground after asgore is killed, and theyre shot back to square one?

what would happen if frisk still fell down in that timeline?

so if youll excuse my still-practicing pixel art (i did end up grabbing the hat and pistol off a clover spritesheet on spriters resource though, and the pose and poncho were built off a couple kris sprites), a small sprite edit, and a maybe-meh teen clover design:

for right now im calling this Vengeance AU for a lack of a better name that wouldnt just be [blank]tale or under[blank], with or without a "yellow" attached

also i made clover a teen just to set this version of them apart, plus a blue, starry poncho instead of their usual bandana, and spurs on their boots

(IF ANYONE PICKS THIS AU UP FOR ANTHING, CLOVER AND FRISK (and chara, if included) USE THEY/THEM PRONOUNS!!)

an au where after the events of yellows merciless run, frisk still falls down mt ebott, whether because of clover, or their own reason,

but clover, who once made the climb themself to get vengeance for the other 5 fallen humans, isnt about to let yet another go missing under their watch, and decides to chase after them, and bring them back home. by force, if necessary.

so it ends up with frisks journey through the underground being constantly chased by clover. and while clover doesnt want to intentionally hurt frisk, since their motivation is the "protection" of humankind, it would still no doubt be terrifying for frisk, and clover WILL hurt the monsters.

ruins end up being mostly the same, minus clovers pursuit. toriel, still locked in the ruins, probably wouldnt have heard about asgores death, and would only realize upon seeing clover, grown up, covered in dust, and detached from the world around them.

outside though, things would take a much more bleak turn.

the royal guard is more present after a surge of recruitment, monsters have mostly accepted that theyre stuck down there for eternity, some making the most of it and trying to live happily, others not so much. and when it comes to humans, monsterkind is just a little more on-edge.

papyrus also ends up being recruited, however hes only a lookout/watchman, and not a fully-fledged guardsman, due to undynes biases. she WOULD have preferred he wasnt hired at all, but the guard was desperate, and didnt have many other volunteers

also due to hotlands evacuation at the time, martlets final stand is mostly forgotten, only seen as a rumor with little ground. the only thing people know of is that there was a strange withered flower on the roof of the apartments, but no one thinks anything of it. there is, however, still a lingering resentment in the air around it that makes monsters uneasy, but also weirdly enough, like theres someone watching over all of them

other than that, im not too sure where this au would go, how frisk would end up dealing with clover by the end, or even if frisk would end up in places like the dunes or steamworks, or if theyd stick to roughly the same areas.

i mostly just thought itd be interesting to start to imagine how different things would be, and considering clovers personality and motivations in merciless, i thought itd be interesting if they became an antagonist, following frisk down to drag them back

i might think more on this and add stuff onto it in the future, but for right now this is all there is, but people are free to build on it in their own ways, if they like!! (and/or send an ask and i can TRY to think of an answer, but knowing myself i cant promise anything)

[nine-fingered-entity]

stargate has zero good romantic storylines

[dorkicon]

For the ask.... Mr Brain Storm please 👀👉🏽👈🏽

Also hiiiiiii it's been a while!!!! 👀

send me a character and i’ll list:

favorite thing about them

(laying awake in bed) jesus christ, everything he did was always for love wasnt it.

dont get me wrong, its a totally selfish move, bordering on, like, obsession. but its so tragic that he was. i dont know. he was like. i can fix this. i can bring quark back, just like i can solve any problem, i can solve this. and hes so (obsessed? focused?) that he got everyone killed in an alternate universe in pursuit of that. he was willing to wipe himself from existence bro.

idk i also really like those rare moments where he just shows some straight up empathy, like when he comforts chromedome...hes a very interesting character.

he strikes me as a guy whos all "yeah ive got this under control. i can fix everything and get what i want in the end, and i can do it alone" (everything is on fire)

(im missing some nuance here, i really need to read mtmte again...ider where i left off at this point. point is. i like him.)

least favorite thing about them

i dont care how mr roberts writes his dialog. theres no way brainstorm is british.

favorite line

this isnt a line or anything, and i cant even find the panel but how fucking funny is it that brainstorm owns microscopes that look like perceptor. how does perceptor deal with this. just like emotionally.

also his whole trial scene was pretty great.

brOTP

brainy and chromey. just two well adjusted dudes in a normal friendship.

brainstorm telling him not to forget rewind. just like how he hasnt forgotten quark (face in hands) jesus christ. we need more robot therapists.

he and nautica were really cute too. also rodimus :^] of course i gotta say perceptor too. more on that below

OTP

yeah u know i have thoughts on simpatico. i think theyre both pretty alike, as much as theyre different (that totally made sense) like theyre unpleasant, rude, and smarter than you, but theyre also two deeply lonely dudes that slowly crack over the course of the series and. i think im just a sucker for that.

also they kiss on the Mouth

nOTP

meh

random headcanon

brainstorm has given himself immunity to most poisons "just in case". no one has ever tried to poison him, it was just something he wanted to do.

unpopular opinion

honestly i dont go in the tags very often anymore, but i kinda feel like sometimes ppl give brainstorm the rodimus treatment where they write him like some lolrandom character and its just kinda like...Well okay.

song i associate with them

you guys thought i was gonna put weird science. ha. little did yall know, i had another novelty science hit locked and loaded!!!

favorite picture of them

these panels put a big ol smile on my face...its so much. brainy checking his nails, the way he whips his head around, the call back to the first time brainstorm called them simpatico. its just mwah.

[theavatarspirit]

Do you have a recommendation list of wlw books? Could be your favorites or the ones you thought were the best or just anything really. I'm always looking for more of them

of course my dude

lets get the big boys out of the way

this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone. you've probably heard about. you've probably seen quotes from it. i myself was late to it (i read it the other month) but lord is the hype worth it (in my opinion). made me crazy.

the priory of the orange tree by samantha shannon. yes its big. im sorry but it is worth it. samantha the audacity to create sabran berethnet and let me read the book in a 24 period. the yearning of it all.

gideon the ninth/harrow the ninth by tamsyn muir. its aight. im not the person you should go to about gtn tbh but everyone else out there will tell you about it.

my personal favs

a memory called empire/a desolation called peace by arkady martine. yes i am talking about them again. these two books are the best thing ever written. how many hugos can one woman win. it is so intricate and layered and nobody says what they mean and the politics and the brain surgery and the sluttiness of former ambassadors. thinking about mahit dzmare's character makes me feral. three seagrass can be a teixcalaan so personal.

foundryside/shorefall by robert jackson bennett. me once again banging my one man drum about foundryside. please it is so good i dont care if the fantasy magic system isn't for you. there is a shit talking key. there is brain surgery. there are complex morals. there is a wlw romance just for the hell of it. where the plot goes in shorefall to this day makes me batshit insane. i have read shorefall at least half a dozen times in four months. can the third book come out now please mr bennett i am dying.

the long way to the small angry planet by becky chambers. becky chambers my beloved. i would die for you. i am so sorry i haven't read to be taught yet but i will buy everything you write. but about this actual book it is perfect. everything in this book was so good and soft and whenever i thought something would happen that would make me mad. nope. every single book in this series (there are four of them and all are beautiful to look at if you dont live in america) is outstanding. becky chambers and arkady martine duking it out for the hugo next year.

other books i wholeheartedly recommend

the rise of kyoshi/the shadow of kyoshi by fc lee. yes they are fantastic. if you like atla read them.

when the tiger came down the mountain by nghi vo. stunning novella but i recommend reading the first one the empress of salt and fortune first. also stunning but not as gay.

the jasmine throne by tasha suri. the start of a promising trilogy. the slow burn reeled me in lads. but in my honest opinion not as morally grey as what the people on goodreads said.

sweet and bitter magic by adrienne tooley. do you not mind ya? do you like every single trope imaginable shoved into a book? this is the book for you. the angst got to me ill admit it.

the atlas six by olivie blake. some kind of weird dark academia shit going on here. a plot relevant threesome. not wlw but theres lgbt rep throughout.

the library of the unwritten/the archive of the forgotten by aj hackwith. again not wlw but lgbt rep but i adore these books. third in the trilogy comes out the end of the year and i am stoked. cool library concepts is the best book plot and this are by far the coolest.

steel crow saga by paul krueger. a fun read overall. atla and pokemon vibes with some of that sweet sweet complex moral questions with a fun wlw couple.

jane unlimited by kristin cashore. i dont care it gets really weird in the end i adore this book. get weird kirstin you do you. fun chose your own adventure type thing. main character has romantic moments with two of the characters and its not romance heavy.

finna by nino cipri. novella about two exes trying to get through inter dimensional ikea. yes that is the plot. yes it is good

books that i haven't finished/read yet but have heard they are good

she who became the sun by shelley parker-chan. ive read the first couple chapters and was meh but everyone else ive seen that has read it loved it. is said to be mulan meets the song of achilles, which are two things i have not seen/read so.

one last stop by casey mcquiston. i have read 2/3s of this but ill be honest the sex kinda threw me out of the book. if you dont have this problem and liked rwrb you will also like this.

the liars dictionary by eley williams. if you like pretentious english kid speak. really neat idea for a book is you can get past that.

the councillor by ej beaton. ugh i wanted to read this one so bad but i found it at not a good reading time for me. sounds like it is fantastic though. politics heavy book.

unconquerable sun by kate elliot. if you like greek retellings and can stand tense changes (i cannot).

black sun by rebecca roanhorse. have heard nothing but good things and is hugo nominated and yet i have not finished. shame on me.

these feathered flames by alexandra overy. russian folklore inspired fantasy. dont know whether it is classified as ya but has ya vibes.

fireheart tiger by aliette de bodard. i haven't even started this one but its short and has politics, yearning, and yearning while doing politics.

[emmi-kat]

SPG Kazooland Master Post

Kazooland is the alternate dimension in the Steam Powered Giraffe Universe.  This post contains various facts and tidbits mentioned by David and Bunny Bennett about it on tumblr and the official SPG websites over the years.  Please feel free to share more information in the reblogs!

Kazooland was named for the mentor of David Bennett, Bunny Bennett, Jon Sprague, Erin Burke, and Bryan Barbarin, Mr.Jerry Hager's mime persona: Kazoo the Mime

By 1897, Peter Walter had unlocked the power of Blue Matter and   subsequently, created an alternate reality he dubbed   Kazooland.

Excerpt from The Story of the Cavalcadium

The Cavalcadium tried to  make a permanent portal to Kazooland in their building, based on Peter Walter I’s studies.

The  Cavalcadium was wiped from existence in an instant, and it took Peter  a few months to realize it had simply vanished. Time and space itself  left a void to forget it ever was.     

The  Cavalcadium building now exists in the seams of Kazooland, and acts  as a hub to many other parts of the dimension. A few doorways even exist on Earth.          

Current link to the map of Kazooland: https://www.thecavalcadium.com/Kazooland.html

Information available about Kazooland as late as 2014

  Asininia*             The dark kingdom of Ignatius Becile. Long having taken refuge from Earth, the   black-handed Becile has built a giant city which is depleting Asininia of its   natural resources and precious rock candy veins. His aim is creating an   unstoppable army of candy-powered automatons to consume the universe.

*name is derived from “asinine”

The 8th Dimension of Absolute and Infinite Terror           The only persistent door to the  terrible 8th dimension. Its history is unclear but it is indeed locked and guarded by Jumbo, The Pink Whale With A Top  Hat.* The 8th dimension is notorious for being the place of fermenting  nightmares and evil Lovecraftian Beasts.

*Jumbo can be found in the album The Vice Quadrant, guarding Commander Cosmo and The Necrostar

Horroria

A jagged mountain range of ash and  death, which is primarily a refuge for monsters. A couple of human  settlements exist, but the majority of inhabitants of the continent  are Vampires, Werewolves, Demons, Zombies, Witches, Cultists,  Poltergeists, Man-Eating Hamburgers, and Hamburger-Eating Men.

Hypexion V     

A presumed alien homeworld of the  Hypexions; thin bipedal humanoids with a sweet tooth.

Ironically Foreboding Shaped Islands     

The Chaos Sea marks these bodies of  land as a legend, but time travelers and fortunate explorers speak of  adventurous sailors, pirates, and buried treasure. It is  believed the famous Captain Albert Alexander was the first to have  sailed the Chaos Sea, yet only stories remain.

Lola     

The Hypexion Moon infested with the  diabolical Moon Worms. The Moon Worm Queen is held responsible for  eating a chunk of Hypexion V before she was destroyed, but a newly  born Moon Worm Queen is the talk among the stars. The   talking stars of course.

Lotsasand     

An ancient dust land belonging to the  ancestors of the Kingdom of Set. Though primarily a land for the  outsourcing of dust and camels, the age old tales of Jackal Men,  Living Mummies, and Scarab People still invoke questions of mysticism  in even the most skeptical of skeptics.

Meh     

An icy northern land of Snow Queens and  Mystical Creatures. Many a wise pipe smoking old bearded man tell  stories about this enchanted place, but few are listened to.

Merveille

Merveille is the remains of the once  great Circus Empire, which exploded eons ago and left a watercolored  land of saturated imagination. The inhabitants are mostly the  Speechless Ones, also known as Mimes. It is often described as a  tangible dream, and artists from all over the multiverse have tapped  into its presence for inspiration and escape.

Cities:                    Bip

The capital of  Merveille was named after its founder, and is a favorite spot for  vacation for Peter Walter VI. It was also in Bip that the Great War of 1823 was ended by a mysterious mime with a magical  kazoo.

New Pieland    

Once a paradise of wilderness, pilgrims  from Old Pieland settled here declaring it New Pieland after their  former continent was completely devoured since it actually lived  up to its namesake. It was quite literally a giant land mass of flaky  crust with a warm gooey appley interior.

New Pieland is home to many American immigrants and many other multiverse settlers.  Humans, Robots, Clowns, Cat People, and Vleeds are just a few of the races you'll find in the melting pot which is New Pieland.

Cities:                    Biscuit Town

Biscuit Town is a famous small  mining town in the eastern part of New Pieland. It is home   primarily to clowns, wizards, and talking animals. Biscuit Town has   been run by Walter Robot The Jon until recently, and was the first  town in New Pieland to elect a robot for Mayor. Currently, in  the Jon's absence the Mayor's Assistant Boft is  struggling with the encroaching rogue nation of Asininia, a  resource-hungry super kingdom of mad scientists and candy-powered  androids.    Preferbia   This large sprawling landscape   of suburbia is a metropolis of 1950's ideals, where the  beautiful residents are protected from the ravages of time by a blue  matter rich force field over the city. Created by a visionary man  from Earth after slipping through an interdimensional rift, Howard  Lloyd saw the potential of the unstable rift and created what some  have called the 1950s utopia of mankind. Those who enter  the city rarely decide to leave the prospect of eternal youth, but  some do choose to escape Preferbia's roving gangs of fish mutants and  frequent attacks by the Hypexion Moon Worms.

Snornia

Snornia is the last remaining haven for  mystical beings. It is cut off from the rest of the world by a  vengeful Dragon God, but those who have seen it speak of a fantastical world of magic and danger, with princesses in towers,   dexterous elves making shoes, and six winged warlocks. Humans  who find ways to enter usually do so to train to become wizards or  dragons, but many are eaten by the Dragon God, and even more give up  and sail to Party Island.

South Adventurica

A largely unexplored tangle of   constantly transforming jungles, swamps, and plains unbound by  any mappable record of time. Adventurers have sought to unlock the   continent's mysteries for years, and its surprises still continue to   surprise avid surprise seekers. Dinosaurs, giant insects, carnivorous   plants, elementals, Forgotten Gods, Bobby Darin, and Santa Claus are   all said to live here, but the only proof of their existence are the   ravaged journals from explorers of the past...

And that captured dinosaur amusement  park off the coast.

Verk     

A rainy settlement of time travelers  from the 1890s. It is separated from the world by an ethereal mist of  aether called "Henry's Breath," long believed to be   generated by the fat ghost of England's Henry the 8th.  Most settlers began traversing the aether via multidimensional  travel from when Colonel P. A. Walter I discovered Blue Matter in  1896, but all matter of being from the multiverse seems to have  leaked through to embrace knowledge, Victorian style, and to tinker with steampunk abominations.

Cities:                    Dandyton

The Capital of Verk is a bustling city  of inventors, scientists, airship pilots, alchemists, airship pilots,  ghosts, and airship pilots. It is home to the Verk Dandy Candy  Factory, many airships, and the Verkian Rift, a dimensional  hub to countless other realities.

The (old) Cavalcadium landing page including links to Worlds (Earth, Kazooland, and the 8th Dimension), Characters, and Species

Characters include (but are not limited to): Beebop, Bip, Boft, Brown Suits, Buster Becile, Captain Albert Alexander, Delilah, Doc Laborday, G. G., Guy Hottie, Hatchworth,The Highwayman, I. M. Becile, Kazoo, Lily Brennan, Lorene Keaton, Norman Becile, Peter Walter I, Peter Walter II, Peter Walter III, Peter Walter IV, Peter Walter V, Peter Walter VI, Rabbit, Rex Marksley, The Jon, The Spine, The Suspender Man, Uncle Ralphie, Upgrade, and Wanda Becile

Species include (but are not limited to): Robots, Samurai, Scarab  People, Seafarers, Steampunks, Talking  Animals, Trolls, Vampires, Vleeds, Warlocks, Werewolfs, Witchs, Wizards, and Zombies

The Temecula Rift

Prior to the 2013 Walter Robotics Expo, an accident occurred while 26 y/o Peter Walter VI accidentally sealed a Blue Matter Rift that he was trying to open for high speed inter-dimensional travel between Earth and Kazooland.  The result was an explosion that singularly hit Peter Walter VI in his face.  He now wears an iconic keyhole mask to hide whatever the results of the explosion may have been.

Links:

https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/49702485000/regarding-the-temecula-rift

https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/51763873084/walter-robotics-owner-peter-walter-vi-hospitalized

https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/52636220497/a-message-from-peter-walter-vi

Audio posts of Isabella Bennett discussing Kazooland Canon circa 2015:

Kazooland Canon 1/3

Kazooland Canon 2/3

Kazooland Canon 3/3

Rabbit’s white faceplates are made from a porcelain-like material from Kazooland called Impossium

[sourdough-morbread]

Morgana 👀

ok so i know you left this ask ages ago and this is like so fucking long i am so sorry.

but i just... i have a lot of thoughts on morgana. *hides pages of notes made for two big morgana-centric WIPs*

First impression: this is what went through my mind in my first watch through

s1: i fell for morgana really quickly. i was like. YES she has MAGIC and she tells off uther and arthur. 

s2: i still liked her but i getting concerned about the direction the writers were pulling her character in season 2. i was quite disappointed in the way her turn to evil was written. like she was good then barely on screen and very damsel-in-distressy for some reason. and then she became evil!morgana with zero explanation and zero reluctance. didnt really make sense to me.

s3: i enjoyed her as a villain in, but at that point she was a completely different character in my eyes. not in the old character new instalment but in a entirely different person was put inside her. 

s4: she was so boring and one dimetional. just. meh. she barely felt like a threat.. 

s5: i wasnt even paying attention to her.  she has become the random conflict generator the writers rather than a character. so i just didnt care. also i skipped a few eps in my first go so. like dark tower bc i didnt want to see gwen hurt. so i missed out on the emotional impact of that.

Impression now: after rewatching i can see her character arc a lot better. i still think her arc wasnt well done. but thats because the execution was lacking, rather than the trajectory of her character not making sense. because it actually makes a lot of sense.

like in season 1, she is basically immune. she is caught aiding mordred and yet she can get away with uther yelling at her and have it all be forgotten with an apology. meanwhile tom is executed for being seen with a sorcerer. when she wants to kill uther, i dont think she thinks she will be caught. nobody would ever dare accuse morgana and arthur would never suspect it. 

then she discovers she has magic herself and all of that immunity is gone. and without that safety net she becomes willing to endanger so many people, including the allies of magic in camelot. you know, people she would be screaming at the defence of previously.  

her in 1x10 is a small glimpse of what she could have been. a force for good. someone willing to actually fight against what uther and rulers like him were doing. and i would have loved to see that. 

but thats not what the writers chose. instead she regains her footing in hatred and blaming everyone for the fear she felt of death and disgust she felt of herself once she became one of those she defended but saw as beneath her none the less. 

and i will never not be salty about how they skipped over her turning evil and how flat she became. like. let me have a deeply evil terrifying witch damn it! 

i think what makes her terrifying is that she doesnt want power. not really. she wants revenge. she wants to take everything arthur cares about. she wants the throne because arthur doesn't get to have it. she wants camelot to kill its people. she doesnt care about power beyond how much pain she can cause with it. and thats so terrifying. enemy with no goal but to cause you pain. and knows all your weaknesses and can fool the people you have wronged to think she is fighting for their salvation. how do you even fight that? 

idk i just think it was underutilised. again she was just a conflict generator the writers used until the final battle. even then mordred was more significant than morgana. 

Favorite moment: just her in the entirety of beginning of the end. if i had to pick one moment it would be her goading arthur to look behind the curtain. its just so good.

Idea for a story: again... the WIPs. but one i havent written yet.

i had one au where arthur found out about her magic on accident and like. it kicked off a whole plot of her learning magic, and arthur finally facing how terrible uther is and getting his shit together. its not a very detailed idea. morgause would probably use this opportunity to manipulate arhtur. agravain would proably be not evil, tho still a spineless slimy noble. idk.

Unpopular opinion: this is not going to be a surprise to people who know me, but i dislike pretty much all of the discussion ive seen about 2x03. 

fandom seems to be stuck on this dichotomy of either merlin should have told her about his magic and by not doing so he betrayed her— he did not. merlin tried to help her at the risk of his own life. go watch 2x03 again. or merlin reacted perfectly— also he did not. even while helping her, he still refused to acknowledge her magic.

in a situation where something invisible about you can get you killed, subtle word choices matter. merlins words, him continuing to say he wouldn't know if it was magic, even though they both knew it was and that the other also knew, means something. it means i will keep your secret but i cannot help you. this is by no means a moral failing of merlin. he made this choice out of fear for his own life, and i think it is unreasonable to expect him to react perfectly.

morgana in turn had no reason to go to merlin again about her magic. he has made it clear he doest want to be involved, which he has no responsibility to. and why would merlin be able to help her? he, as far as she knows, has no personal experience with magic except his sorcerer friend. 

besides, druids were the safest place for a her to be. it was the safest place for any warlock to be, including merlin.  her knowing or not knowing about merlin has nothing to do with it. like. everything that happens in camelot between merlin and morgana in season 2 is perfectly understandable. they didnt wrong each other. 

what merlin and morgana actually did wrong is getting all those druids killed because they didnt think the plan through. like all of those people in that camp died. aglain, the person helping morgana, died right in front of her and mordred. the druids were the only ones wronged in that situation. which i have never seen pointed out. 

Favorite relationship: her and mordred

listen there is only a singular instance of morgana genuinely hesitating to hurt somebody after her turn and that person is mordred.

Favorite headcanon: oracle!morgana. this is like a whole big headcanon thats basically the origin story of how draognlords came to be. something happened and oracles stole dragons wills and their births to give to mortals as punishment. and then a group of these people came to albion and became the Seers and the dragonlords. who have like different traditions to the druid seers and the priestesses who use methods adapted from scry methods.

thats why she can speak with aithusa even though aithusa cant speak. 

[maruwrites]

The Revolution pt. V

Summary: Dustin thinks he’s finally gonna have a quiet, normal childhood after the events with the Demodogs and Dart, until a new threat shows up at his house in the form of a 17-year old girl.

Warnings: Cursing, because ofc. 

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Henderson!Reader

Word count: 3.2 k (w h a t)

Part I :: Part II :: Part III :: Part IV

“So… What do you like to do?,” Dustin asked.   

He’d promised both his mom and Steve that he would be polite to (Y/N). And during the dinner the Henderson family had at his house, Dustin complied. Which involved him not saying a lot, because he knew his first reflex was to be mean to her. Or at least a little snappy. Anyways, he obeyed and mostly just watched as his mom and this girl talked, or rather as his mom nervously filled up the space with empty words and the girl just nodded occasionally and spoke a little. 

But now Dustin, (Y/N), and Steve were in Steve’s car, going to the diner for dessert.   

This had been Steve’s idea.

‘She looks really nice when she is not being rude to me,’ Steve thought. ‘Shit.’

(Y/N) was trying to catch her breath. The boy had been telling her stories about Dustin and his friends, and most of them were funny. He refrained from letting her in on any of the events of the Demogorgon and Dart, because why would he tell anyone about that? So he just stuck to the stories about the Party, about their love of Dungeons and Dragons, about his adventures in babysitting them.

“Okay,” she said, still giggling a bit. “I guess I understand why you’re hanging out with middle schoolers, then.” 

(Y/N) stopped. She noticed she’d been laughing too hard and tried to compose herself, so she cleared her throat and looked around for the waitress to ask for more coffee. Steve noticed that, but made no attempt to point it out. He knew it would only make her mad.

“So… What did she say when you called her?”

At one point during their lunch, the girl had phoned Claudia to schedule dinner. A family dinner. 

(Y/N) shrugged her shoulders. “She immediately said yes.” The girl laughed, bitterly. She cleared her throat one more time. “But I told her she needed to talk to Dustin first. So she’s gonna ask him when he comes back from… Matt’s house?” 

“Mike.”

“Mike, yeah.”

Steve sat upright and was about to say something when the waitress arrived, bringing (Y/N) more coffee. He declined.

“You were gonna say…,” she looked at him expectantly. 

What was he gonna say? He watched her as she blew her coffee, a futile attempt at making it slightly less hot. She took a sip and made a low, hissing noise when the drink burned her tongue, furrowing her brows slightly. (Y/N) looked at him again. He had been staring this whole time without realizing it.

“Right, uh. Yeah. What I was gonna say was…,” Steve began explaining himself, buying some time. He had forgotten what he was gonna say. “Maybe, after the dinner with the three of you -I doubt he’s gonna say no, to be honest. He’s way too curious to say no- I could pick you guys up and we could come here?” ‘What? That was a stupid idea.’

“Why?,” (Y/N) asked, her forehead wrinkling.

“Uh, it might be easier for him to accept you… Uh, away from his mom? I don’t know if this makes sense but, I feel like seeing you with Mrs. Henderson would be tough on him, like you’re trying to steal her or something.”

“I’m not trying to steal her.”

“I know that. And you know that. But he’s just a kid. A very smart, too-smart-for-his-own-good kid. But a kid. Plus, I can serve as a buffer, y’know? Help you out. After the family dinner, of course.” Steve scratched his head and (Y/N) noticed that that was a nervous tick. She couldn’t help but be a little endeared by that. Not a lot, no. Just a little.

“Huh. Yeah, I guess. You might have a point here,” she said, taking a sip of this coffee. It wasn’t so hot now. “You are more insightful than you look.” (Y/N) gave him a little smile, partially hidden by the ceramic mug she held in front of her lips.

“Wow. A backhanded compliment.” Steve smirked, folding his arms in front of him. “That was the nicest thing you’ve said to me.” 

(Y/N) snorted and Steve just thought: “Fuck.”

“What do you mean?,” she asked from the back of the car. Dustin had called shotgun as soon as they went outside, which won him a stern look from Steve. The older boy was about to complain when (Y/N) said it was no problem. "Ugh, for fun. Like, what do you like to do or whatever? Do you not know English?” Dustin huffed, crossing his arms and staring at the streets passing by. 

“Hey, watch it.” Steve gave him another stern look from the corner of his eyes. 

“I never wanted to do this, Harrington. Okay? You were the one who was like, ‘Meh, she is cool. Your mother would appreciate if you were nice to her.’” The younger boy used a high-pitched voice pretending he was Steve, and it made (Y/N) snort from the back. She was trying not to think about what he was saying, rather how he was saying it. “Practically begging me-" 

“Dustin…” 

It was quiet for a while. 

"I like listening to music. The Clash, David Bowie. Prince and The Revolution is my favorite of all time, and Purple Rain was basically all I heard when I left Jacksonville and came to Hawkins. I own a t-shirt from a concert I went to a while back and it’s basically my uniform. Uh, what else? I love reading, books have saved my life more times than I can count. Once literally, when I struck a boy in the head with a Moby Dick copy.” Dustin snorted quietly and coughed, pretending he hadn’t laughed at the story. (Y/N) noticed it and smirked, proudly, but said nothing. "I have a soft spot for adventure novels, like The Three Musketeers…” She trailed off and caught the little smile on Steve’s face. “Also, Stephen King! Carrie and The Shining have kept me up at night quite a lot.” 

(Y/N) had never been so hell bent on making someone like her, that was why she was being so honest. It bothered her a bit, she felt too vulnerable. But it was worth it, she guessed, if it made the too-smart-for-his-own-good kid like her or at least accept her existence. What she didn’t expect was that Steve would be hanging on to her every word. 

"Oh, and I also play video games. A lot. I had a real problem as a kid, you couldn’t tear me away from the arcade if you wanted to. Like, Dig-Dug, Galaga, Dragon’s Lair…" 

Dustin’s eyes grew excited at her every word, fitting the girl behind him in the description of the older brother he had always dreamt of. She didn’t miss it, his reaction. She could see it from the side of his face. (Y/N) was trying really hard not to smirk, seeing as she might actually be winning him over. She made a mental note to thank Steve. 

“I love those video games! I used to have the high score for Dig-Dug at The Palace, y’know? The arcade in town. Anyways, that was until this girl Max…” Dustin had begun talking with an excitement in his voice but it died down the more he spoke. The boy noticed he was sounding too nice, and immediately backtracked. He became serious all of a sudden and started messing around with his hands. "Oh. I see. Video games, yeah. Whatever.” 

Steve first noticed it when they parted ways, him insisting on walking her back to the bookstore when her lunch break was over. (Y/N) turned to him when they reached it and waved a tiny goodbye, her voice low. She walked in and he was left staring at her through the clear glass of the storefront. The unruly-haired girl struck up a conversation with the owner as she took some books from a box and began placing them in their respective shelves.

He felt odd. There was this feeling inside of him. Steve couldn’t quite pinpoint where it was coming from, or what it was in fact, but he knew that in order to get to the bottom of that feeling, he’d have to keep talking to her, helping her out. It was almost this restlessness. Yeah, restlessness. That was what he felt whenever he looked at (Y/N). He couldn’t stand still. Nor could his heart.

She smirked again. "Why do you ask?” There was a long pause. 

“I’m asking because the whole point of this is us getting to know each other, right?” Dustin snapped, looking behind at her as Steve hit the breaks harder than he had to. The three lurched forward, realizing they had reached the diner. “Harrington, what the hell?” 

”(Y/N), um. Do you wanna maybe go inside and order for us?” 

“I don’t know what you guys want.” She cocked her brows. 

“Or maybe just order for yourself, we’ll be right out.”   

“I’m not that hungry, we just ate a bunch of…” She stopped when she saw Steve fake-smile at her. “Um, sure.“ as she made her way out of his car, mumbling how weird he was acting.   

As soon as she slammed the door, he turned to the younger boy. “What are you doing, Dustin?” 

The boy sighed and mumbled, almost inaudibly: “I don’t wanna be here.” 

“Why not? She is pretty cool, and you seemed really excited to have things in common with her.” He huffed. “Look, no one’s expecting you to embrace her right away or to invite her to the next campaign at Mike’s, or something. Just talk to her like a normal person. You two have a lot in common. Who knows?" 

Dustin scoffed, but he knew. He was starting to warm up to her. She had been nice to his mom, and helped out with the dishes at the awkward dinner, and now was willing to stand there while Dustin snapped at her. The more he discussed it with Will and El, who might have the closest experience to (Y/N)’s, the more he realized that maybe being given away as a baby was a shitty thing to have happened to someone, and that perhaps she wasn’t looking for anything except her family. And now, after what she’d said in the car, he wanted to talk to her about her high scores, about the books she had been reading, whether she liked science her not (he had a feeling she did), ask her to show him some cool music, tips on how to impress a girl. Everything. But there was a part of him holding him back, the part of him that answered the door a few days ago and was confused to find out that he had a half-sister. The part of him that was terrified that everything was about to change, when in reality everything had changed. 

It took him a few seconds, but Dustin finally took a long breath. “Is she really cool?” 

“Yeah. I haven’t spent a lot of time with her, but yeah. She’s cool,” Steve said, staring out the window of his car and finding (Y/N) inside the diner, sitting on the booth they had sat and fiddling with her thumb. There it was again. That restlessness. 

“I have a proposition for you. Over.” Steve let go of the walkie button and waited. Dustin was too curious, at some point he was going to say something. It took a couple of minutes, time the boy probably spent cursing himself and pacing in his room, but eventually, there was the sound of a click on the other end.

“Harrington, I swear to God…”

Steve smirked. “You didn’t say over. Over.”

“Fucking asshole… Over.”

“Do you wanna hear it or not? Over.”

A moment of silence. “…Yes.” Steve waited on the other end. “Son of a bitch! Over!”

It was hard to say something when Steve kept chuckling. “You should say yes to the dinner. Over.”

“Why the fuck would I do that? Over.” Dustin sighed.

“Because after, the three of us can go to the diner and then you and the girl can talk without your mom. You should get to know her before you start hating her. Over.” 

Now, Steve thought he had lost the boy. It took him too long, so long that Steve gave up. He left the walkie on his bed and went to bathroom to take a shower. It was only when he was toweling off that he heard the click. There was a long sigh before Dustin spoke.

“I’ll go only because I spoke to everyone and they think I need to at least figure out what she’s after. Over.” 

Steve sighed. “She’s only interested in getting to know you. She’s not after anything. Over.”

“Yeah. We’ll see. Over and out.”

Steve dropped down on the bed, not caring that his wet hair would damp the pillow. So Dustin accepted it. Begrudgingly so, but he said yes. That was something.

“I ordered fries and milkshakes,” she said, giving Steve a pointed a look. He smiled as he sat down in front of her, Dustin plopping down right next to him. “I told her we’d order the rest once you guys got here.” 

(Y/N) was screaming internally. This was going bad, not good, total shit. Shit. She tried too hard, that was what she got when she tried too hard, just a whole lot of heartbreak and rejection. Dustin had already said he didn’t want to be there and it took not ten minutes of them together in the car before Steve had to ask for some private time to have a conversation with the boy. She wondered how many more times he’d have to do that before that disastrous night ended. 

It was because he was a kid, she knew that. When meeting her parents, she hadn’t been this desperate. Hell, (Y/N) was the opposite, going out of her way to be an asshole, a generally unpleasant person, because she felt she was entitled to at least that. But he looked sweet, a genuinely nice kid. His childish smile, the curly hair, he resembled her foster little brothers way too much for her to ignore that annoying feeling she rarely got. That need to make people like her. 

(Y/N) tried ignoring the silence that came before the waitress arrived and the one that followed right after she left. (Y/N) tried ignoring how Dustin would stare at her, not looking anywhere else. (Y/N) tried ignoring the look on Steve’s face, the one that said ‘Go ahead, say something.’ But after a while, it became too much. 

“I can’t do this.” 

”(Y/N)…” Steve pleaded. 

“No, look. I-Um-Thank you, Steve. Really, for trying to help out.” (Y/N) bit her lips. “But I can’t do this to him. I-I’m sorry, Dustin. I really am. As soon as I found out you-“ She took a deep breath and could see that Dustin’s eyebrows furrowed and his face softened a bit. “When I discovered she’d had another kid, I turned around. I was on my way to Hawkins and I was making phone calls, trying to find out where she lived and someone said your name and I just-” (Y/N) scratched her head. “I drove back. I didn’t know where exactly was back because I wasn’t coming from anywhere, I haven’t had anywhere to come back to in, well, all my life. But I knew-I just knew I couldn’t come here. You don’t deserve this, honestly. No one does, and it was-“

(Y/N) was being honest, she really was. Her anxiety had gotten the best of her, so she gave up. There was no point, right? At least she knew who her mother was, her mother knew who she was. And that was that. No happy endings for her, but she never really expected one. She hadn’t had a very happy start, so why assume the ending would be any different? But the reason (Y/N) stopped talking was because she heard Dustin say something, but he had basically whispered it and she didn’t understand him. 

“What?” 

“��� You don’t deserve this either,” He’d said, now staring anywhere but her. She took a quick glance at Steve, who shrugged very lightly and gave her an encouraging smile. 

(Y/N) scoffed. “Yeah, well.” There was another moment of silence, but this one didn’t absolutely destroy her. This one actually felt good. “I’ve been trying to learn to deal with that shit. I’m not doing the best job, I think? But I’m trying.” 

“It could be worse, I guess. You could be beating the crap out of Steve’s face or trying to run me and my friends over.” Dustin said, shrugging. Steve gave the boy a stern look. 

“What?” (Y/N) laughed, confused. “Why on Earth would I do either of those things?” 

“Don’t mind him.” Steve rolled his eyes. 

“Well, maybe the beating the shit out of Steve’s face. I could do that. It’s not like I haven’t thought about it.” At her comment, Dustin snorted. 

“Hey!” Steve complained. 

“C’mon, man. You just have that face, y’know?” 

“Like you’re begging to be punched.” Dustin completed, looking at him. 

“Exactly!” (Y/N) exclaimed. “Just begging.”   

The two laughed at Steve’s contorted face, and he rolled his eyes. A common enemy, of course. How come he hadn’t thought about that? He would be the two siblings’ common enemy for now, let them make fun of him for a while. The waitress arrived at their table and Dustin noticed when (Y/N) took her fries and dunk them in her chocolate milkshake. He just stared slack-jawed as the girl kept making fun of Steve and his face. When Dustin did the same with his fries, (Y/N) looked at him and smiled, mouthful of fries, giving him a wink. 

"You know, I went to the arcade yesterday and it seemed really cool. But there was a creepy dude working there. He kept following me around, eating Funyons, I think?” 

“Cheesy puffs.” Both boys corrected her and she smiled. 

“Cheesy puffs, yeah. So I didn’t stay long. But I got some money today and I was thinking maybe after this, we can go to the arcade? I didn’t really get to play any of the games there the first time around.” She raised her eyebrows and Dustin gave her the tiniest bit of smiles. But it was something. 

“Yeah, okay,” Dustin said, shrugging his shoulders. He looked at Steve. “You coming?” 

“Sure, buddy.” He winked at Dustin and smiled at (Y/N). “I’d love to see her completely destroy you at Dig Dug.” 

“Hey!” The boy touched his chest, pretending to be offended. 

“I don’t have to. Didn’t this girl, Max, already did that?” (Y/N) smirked. 

“Okay, that’s it. I’m not gonna stand here and have my reputation be questioned like this!” Dustin complained, but he didn’t move. Instead, he ordered a burger from the waitress and kept eating his fries. (Y/N) laughed hard and complained that he was still eating after the large meal Claudia had prepared for them, to which the boy replied that he was about to play at the arcade, so he needed to carbo-load. Meanwhile, Steve watched the back and forth between the two, happy that his plan was working.   

“Maybe I’ll be the one to destroy the both of you.” Steve said, his voice dripping with mischief. (Y/N) and Dustin looked at him, then at each other, and had a laughter fit. 

The younger boy gave Steve a small slap in the back. “Oh, buddy. That’s the funniest thing you’ve ever said. You wish.”

Tags: @moltars​ @sociallyimpairedme​ @hufflepeople @bitchinmouthbreather  @hanasamara @lexannani @uncle-jjezzy

[sweettsubaki]

*se frotte les mains* Tim, Cass, Kon, Riddler, Bart :)

About thisask 

I'massuming you're talking about Preboot!Tim!Cass!Kon!Bart (also you’ll notice best and worst quality are often the same, that’s because a trait can be both a quality or flaw, it usually mostly depends on your PoV).

Tim generalopinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine Iguess | like them! | love them | actuallove of my life

hotnesslevel: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoreticallyhot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

hogwartshouse: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

bestquality: Selfless, Hard Working

worstquality: Selfless, Focused

ship themwith: Kon

brotp themwith: Kon, Bart, Cass Cain and Dick (I used to really like his friendships withHelena and Connor Hawke, too bad DC forgot about them)

needs tostay away from: Steph (the other way around too, I mean I love Steph but untilthey've dealt with their problems they're just gonna end up hurting each otheragain and they don't need the drama ok, they both need happiness, so yeah untilthat happens and they can have a healthy friendship, please keep them away fromeach other), Ra's is an obvious choice too, also Dan Didio and James Tynion IV

misc.thoughts: I think it's pretty obvious he's my favorite DC Character, I misshim. I haven't seen him in 6-7 years now. Also I know that the current plot issupposed to allow DC to bring Preboot!Tim back but they seem to want to goabout it with giving N52!Tim's memories back, which, considering they don'tseem to follow the same thought and emotional patterns I don't see working outin our favor (especially because of the Genius and Nerd trope that seems to befollowing him since N52, I mean they already existed for no valid reason in thefandom but it went from fanon to canon so…).Also I'm pretty sure he has BPD in addition of PTSD, Depression and most of thesymptoms of a victim of a negligent family (like lack of empathy, 0 selfesteem, ect…)...

 Cassgeneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine Iguess | like them! | love them | actuallove of my life

hotnesslevel: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoreticallyhot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

hogwartshouse: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw| hufflepuff

bestquality: Kind

worstquality: none she's perfect :p

ship themwith: no one really but I guess Steph would be the closest one I'd ship herwith (he thing for Kon was precious though)

brotp themwith: Steph & Tim ofc, I guess I can add Babs to that though

needs tostay away from: deathstroke and whoever wrote that arc…

misc.thoughts: While I do like the idea of her loving Ballet, I'm gonna go ahead andsay her portrayal's not much better than Tim's…. though I'd love to blame N52,it started before that after her Batgirl series ended and while I love her Blackbatcostume, I think her appearances in Red Robin are almost the only time in thatperiod where she was actually well done. I kinda wished we had seen her minglea little more with other heroes and that she had appeared in Steph's Batgirlseries…I need to re-read her batgirl series….

 Kongeneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine Iguess | like them! | love them | actuallove of my life

hotnesslevel: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoreticallyhot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

hogwartshouse: gryffindor | slytherin |ravenclaw | hufflepuff

bestquality: his emotional intelligence

worstquality: arrogance (though technically it's more of a mix between slightshallowness, lack of self esteem/Depression)

ship themwith: Tim ofc

brotp themwith: Bart, Tim, Roxy, Krypto.

needs tostay away from: (Adult) Women, seriously it's creepy. Also the Agenda too, Imean I know they don't exist anymore but still. And ofc Lex Luthor, Joe Kelly and Dan Didio

misc.thoughts: I'd like to add Guardian, Dubbilex, Sam Makoa, Ma Kent and Tana Moonas important relationships of his, because they were extremely important andshould not be forgotten (yes just because I don't like KonxTana as a romanticrelationship doesn't mean she wasn't a very important figure in his early life-actually that's the reason why I can't ship them because it was more like ababy chick imprinting on the first person they meet than anything- she's prettymuch filled a mother like role for him early on), Cassie was obviouslyimportant too (again, don't ship it because it seemed more like settling forsomeone who had feelings for him and was virtually unkillable as opposed toTana rather than him actually loving her romantically, but they were fairlygood friends and did date each other).I think it's really important to remember he's a child, at first he was prettymuch a functioning baby and by the end of the pretty much his emotional andmental age has mostly caught up to his physical age but with the addition ofdepression and ptsd it doesn't help (I mean while I ship him with Tim, there'sa reason why I think the romantic feelings only really started after Kon wasgiven a stable home life with Ma and Pa).Same as for the others, I miss him but at least DC admitted N52!Kon was adifferent character so I'm okay with that as long as they bring him back withhis friendship with Tim and Bart (and if they don't really bring Tim back theybetter show him mourning preboot!Tim dammit)

 Riddlergeneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine Iguess | like them! | love them |actual love of my life

hotnesslevel: get away from me | meh |neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10would bang

hogwartshouse: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw| hufflepuff

bestquality: Curiosity

worstquality: Arrogance

ship themwith: no one (though I read an EddiexBruce fic once that made me interested inthe ship…But only in the context of Eddie being a detective)

brotp themwith: again, no one really, though Scarecrow is probably the one I'd go with

needs tostay away from: everyone, he's a dangerous troll          

misc.thoughts: WHY DID THEY RETCON HIS BECOMING A DETECTIVE IT WAS GREAT ! it wasliterally one of the best thing they came up with for him (let's face it rareare the authors who know how to actually use his potential). I like my kinda reformed villaintroll

 Bartgeneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine Iguess | like them! | love them | actuallove of my life

hotnesslevel: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoreticallyhot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

hogwartshouse: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw| hufflepuff

bestquality: Curiosity    

worstquality: Curiosity :p

ship themwith: no one really, but his thing for Carole was really cute, There'spotential with Rose or Kiran but we never really saw anything so none.

brotp themwith: Tim, Kon, the Ray, Greta, Cissie, MAX MERCURY (okay technically it's hisdad but dammit it's Max okay)

needs tostay away from: Inertia, Deathstroke, pretty much anyone who's mean to him

misc. thoughts: He's my precious child okay, Imiss him, but as for Kon, they actually admitted N52!Bart was a differentcharacter when they revealed his origin story (they did it with Tim too butdecided to retcon that, they're idiots) and I think they do actually intend tobring him back so yay (and as for Kon they better make him miss Tim).his Impulse series is precious, honestly if you haven't read it go for it.While it's for different reasons he's in a way similar to Kon and Tim in thathe didn't not have a childhood that allowed him a 'normal' emotional and mentalgrowth (probably one of the reason why I think of Tim/Kon/Bart more easily thanTim/Kon/Bart/Cassie), though those are actually mostly talked about in hisimpulse series in a fairly direct fashion (especially for the time), wheresuperboy and robin mostly danced around the subjects.

[lesbianyennefer]

ok ive finished andromeda and so im gunna collate my final gathered thoughts below:

All in all its been a good game but for the first time in my life in not just a mass effect but a bioware game i dont LOVE it i cant even say i think its very good - ive even been edging on outright disinterest and boredom at various points throughout. bioware games for all their faults have always made me get fully into their stories get completely immersed in the world and in mass effects case in their characters too. but andromeda is the first time ever that i find myself saying if someone asked me how good it was i would say meh. if someone asked me how the latest installment in my favourite thing to exist on this planet was i would say meh. as someone who for whom the original trilogy is genuinely my favourite thing in existence there arent words for how much it upsets me. im not even like ‘i wanna play again!!!’ like i usually am because im usually still so immersed in the world. here are some thoughts and delving deeper into the things that stood out to me:

- the writing: its poor. there have been a few funny moments and lines and most of the main quest dialogue lines are good but compared to what we are used to from mass efefct it PALES. only one moment of real enjoyment stands out to me in the entire game and that was the movie night one - of the only moments in the game I got happy about like the original trilogy. the writing for dialogue not just with npcs but with companions is often clunky, nonsensical, boring and adds nothing to furthering knowledge/relationships. i honestly couldnt tell you a lot about many of them because the conversations didnt pertain to actually getting to know them. it says in the codex that they all consider me close friends but its never been mentioned that they even considered me one nor can i recall when the friendship actually got going or how we reached the ‘close’ part. similarily a lot of criticism from critics was about the base elements being rehashed from the original and its true. so much has just been copy pasted from the ot in a way that actually makes this version less interesting. the big ‘reveals’ in the story are also so badly done that when jaal mentioned the angara were made by the jaardun is it? i didnt have a wow moment like mass effect has given me in the past i was so confused by everything going on i was just like what? nobody seemed to make a big deal out if either considering an entire race just found out they were genetically engineered. the only real ‘wow’ moment i had in the game was finding out ellen ryder was still alive and jien garson was murdered and even then you cant tell anyone and its pretty much forgotten!! ryder knows that jien was murdered by possibly this benefactor who seems to have ulterior motives for all of them and she also knows the reapers invaded and as far as shes aware eradicated the entire milky way. maybe thats something that should be shared with leadership hmm? (as much as i hate tann)  

- the plot: touching on the last the plot was, to me, nothing to write home about. ive always enjoyed that mass effect has a linear storyline that you get stuck into and follow through at a good pace. now i know they said andromeda was going to be more exploration based game - which i would normally like! - but not when the exploration has almost nothing to do with the main story and is so fucking much that you could play for 3 days 12 hours a day and not get to the next bit of the main storyline!! when you space it out too much the audience - or i - loses all connection with the sporadic main plot and what we are actually supposed to be doing so much so that by the time you go to play the next segment you dont even really know why youre there or whats going on. similarly the plot never made me go :O which the ot did a lot. an example ive mentioned before is that seeing the citadel always makes me go ahhh!!! the nexus by comparison is pretty boring. despite its flaws i love the storyline surrounding the reapers and it always gets me each time i play. sitting her writing this if you asked me to detail the main plot of andromeda i honestly couldnt. i cant remember what i did or in which order. theres no substance or linearity.  

- the exploration: i again cant believe im saying this but swtor a mmo game from 2011 has more interesting open worlds with more MANAGEABLE and relevant side quests than andromeda. they might be beautiful but none of the worlds stood out to me - though i loved elaaden and the downed remenant ship star wars reference. i dont mind doing a few bland side quests but when there in the 50s and they lead you on goose chases across entire planets i begin to get agitated. i cant recall the amount of times i had to go back to planets like kadara for one 5 minute firefight and a couple of lines of dialogue. going through the galaxy map animations, the landing animations, the lift down to the slums then crossing the threshold to actually reach the map to THEN find your destination? yeah im pretty done by then.    

- side quests: tying into the above side quests! bioware hinted theyd learned a lesson from dai and taken inspiration from the witcher 3 for their approach to side quests and they appear to have done neither. there are MORE side quests than there were in dai and i actually didnt mind dais but andromedas have become an issue for me - probably because there were so godamn many. they dont have any baring on the story and they are bland and uninteresting mostly fetch quests. i hate bringing the witcher into this because i dont like giving praise to cd projekt red but the truth is bioware could stand to ACTUALLY learn from the witcher 3. the side quests in that are small in number, long in plot and actually connected to the main story. they dont make you feel like youre straying from the plot, their content is deep and very good and they quite often have major consequences. see triss’ quests in novigrad.  one thing i will say is they did seem to take a little of the last into andromeda. some choices have consequences ie saving the salarians over the krogan. that was pretty cool but still underdeveloped. 

- the relationships: by the end of the story i  can say I love all my squadmates despite the fact that i feel like i barely got the chance to know them (the only one il say i dont know at all well enough to love em is gil who has no content aside from the incredibly uncomfortable jill storyline and i wonder why hes the negelected one hmm?). i loved how they moved around and talked to each other but the amount of times i went round to see them and they had nothing to say was a LOT compared to the fact that in me3 everytime you went to see someone they had something (or multiple somethings) to say often without having to enter into a cutscene style animation just to see if they actually want to talk. in terms of romantic relationships ( i romanced peebee) i was disappointed by how little your romanced companion interjects on the story. at least in peebees case there was very little content and she seemed hardly bothered when my ryder got injected then killed herself and then died AGAIN to save them aside from a little snarky “hands off” comment when the archon grabbed her face. she mentioned a little bit back on the ship but compared to me3 and how liara/garrus/ash/kaidan would interject a lot on mission and have hints to their romance sprinkled throughout it felt like another forgotten thing. not one person on the ship mentioned me and peebee aside from a quick thing from sam when i went to see him in my cabin. also jazzed up sex scenes dont mean anything if the rest of the relationship is bland and overlooked. i prefer liara and sheps me3 scene 10x over peebees (my little gay heart still cries). 

- the music: WHERE WAS THE MUSIC??!?! one of my favourite things about games FULLSTOP and the cherry on top of mass effect has always been the music. to this day i love the atmosphere that noveria creates and vigil makes me fucking cry. the suicide mission gets me pumped and leaving earth leaves a gaping hole in my chest. (diverting a bit even dai had fantastic music. in hushed whispers, the lost temple and thedas love theme are among my faves.) aside from the heleus galaxy map music and the ambient from that one destroyed planet i cant recall a single piece of music that stood out. i can remember about 3 tunes overall the map, the main menu and the one that plays a lot when you fight kett. there wasnt even any proper ambient music for the worlds!!!!! there arent words for how upset i am that theres no fucking mission themed bangers. im just really sad about this.       

i think at the end of the day a big reason for me why i havent loved it is because as ive said before it doesnt feel like mass effect to me. to a pretty great extent i think the reason for this is the decision to move to the Andromeda galaxy. the absence of shep and the crew and the normandy is another huge factor but rather unavoidable in terms of continuing the games, but moving to andromeda has robbed the series of everything that made it mass effect. the mass relays, the citadel, the council, the alliance, earth, thessia, palaven they all made mass effect mass effect. Not to mention the quarians (one of my fave races ever), the drell, the volus, hanar, batarians, vorcha they were all a part of what mass effect IS. even the architectural style of the colonies, the nexus its all different and it doesnt have any connection to the ot and the world it created. andromeda feels like its own game completely unrelated to mass effect and one that when considered on its own has an incredibly shaky foundation and sporadic storytelling. at the end of the day it was fun to pass the time but as a huge mass effect fan i feel it was incredibly disappointing and to be quite honest i dont consider it a part of the mass effect i love.   

[samanthasroberts]

Southern Charm Recap: Can They Get Any More White?

I have emerged from my two-day hangover solely to write this weeks recap. Guess killing brain cells is one of my hobbies now.

When we left off I wasnt sure if I was Team Kathryn or Team Whitney, and I dont think thats ever going to get resolved tbh. However, I did just notice Kathryns facial expression in the opening sequence more or less sums up her entire personality.

Thomas and JD, back at it again with the polo. Cause that ended really well the last time. Can they get any more white?

Whitney has some fruit salad and is making coffee and Larissas like, If that’s cooking, I’m about to be the next winner of.

Whitney trying to explain what going steady means to Larissa is pretty hilarious tho.

Kathryn andKody? Corey? Fuck, I forgetare getting a seaweed facial or some shit, AKA Bravo is pampering them so they can talk shit in style. Nice.

Kathryn is bummed that once she has her baby she has to go home alone with her two children.

Kathryn: Im a 24-year-old soon-to-be mother of two. If you dont think Im overwhelmed and nervous then you dont think.

Wow that was like, unnecessarily aggressive Kath.

Cooper? Cooper! Calls Thomas a 50-year-old playboy and is like,

Cooper: Instead of letting it frustrating you I just say let it strengthen you.

Cooper is the moral compass this show needs.

Meanwhile Thomas is sipping bourbon with JD on his porch because Kathryn really needs him.

JD: Hows the baby? Thomas: The doctor said fine… JD looks skeptical, because Im sure he knows better than a trained doctor.

JD: Kathryn moving up the due date seems awfully peculiarseems suspect.

JD is a regular Hardy Boy over here.

JD: I think women dont like being asked for paternity tests.

NO FUCKING SHIT.

JD is like, and Thomas is like, Its clear hes forgotten who hes about to have a kid with because Kathryn is NOT going to be down with Thomas basically accusing her of slutting it up and then trying to trap him into fatherhood. JUST SAYING.

Its date night with Craig and Naomie. Craig chooses going to L.A. over the biggest event for his company, because hes never been to L.A. before. And Craig wonders why hes not allowed to head a bourbon division. I don’t foresee this ending well AT ALL. Craig, youre a fucking idiot and for once Naomie is in the right to tell you youre fucking up.

Craig: Do you see how hard Im trying to justify this?

Yeah, because you KNOW YOURE IN THE WRONG. Thats literally what justification is.

Cameran and Landon meet up for a candle-making class and I am kind of jealous because that low-key sounds fun. Landons explaining her travel guide to Cam, so Im going to take a quick nap.

Cameran: I think its hard for Landon bc she was a typical Southern stereotype of the woman who got married young and was taken care of and she doesnt have that anymore.

Wait, how is this the first Im hearing of this failed first marriage? How has this NEVER come up before this season??

Cameran: So any man prospects? Landon: IDK not really its kind of sad and pathetic.

Landon is like Same tho. Cameran: Do you think the reason youre not meeting anyone is because you want something to work out with Shep? Landon:…Yeah

Cameran and I are both like, FINALLY!

*Cue a montage of them looking really couple-y* I’m rooting for you guys!

Landon brings up every middle schoolers dilemma which is that if she dates Shep, then shell lose him as a friend. Can we get like, a violin quartet to score some melodramatic music or something?

Craig and Shep make it to L.A. and Whitneys bachelor pad is sick. I guess this is what that Bravo money gets you. On an unrelated note, I have a very compelling idea for a new reality show, if you wanna get on board Bravo, Ill get you in at the ground level.

Craig: I wouldve had FOMO if I hadnt gotten to come out heresothanks.

Whitney: Meh whatevs

Whitney: #NewCraig has taken on this persona thats like, not chill dude.

Whitney basically lets it go with the caveat that he may never fully trust Craig again. Eh, Im sure theyll be fine.

Shep: You know when youre perfectly drunk and youre really good at pool? Is that like when Im really drunk and I think Im really good at dancing?

Classic Shmosby.

Larissa crashes the boys weekend which is not at all chill. Larissa is, I guess, the WGG of the group.

Shep: Should I change? I dont want to look all fratty and Southern.

Well that ship sailed like, approximately 36 years ago. Whitney makes a joke about waking up in the morning covered in blood and vomit. Was he secretly with me and my friends this weekend? Unclear. V. possible.

These two slutty-looking blondes show up and Shep is in fucking heaven. Craig low-key wants to kill himself.

Whitney: The goofy, disarming thing works in Charleston but not so much in L.A.

I’m sorry, Whitney, but who you callin goofy? You’re not exactly a chiseled Greek god over there. Whitney takes a casual shot at Craigs bourbon knowledge, or lack thereof, and now that hes gotten that off his chest this friendship is back on track.

The aftermath of Whitneys party looks a lot like the scene I dealt with Sunday morning. So, like, maybe they really were there.

Whitney: The marker of a good boys weekend is a pool of vomit with a partially digested meatball in the middle.

Whitney talks about how Shep didnt get any last night and Whitney said he had a meeting with Hand Solo which made me LOL.

Sheps like, and Im getting soooo mf sick of this trope. I am convinced Shep just acts this way because y’all expect him to be a fuckboy and nobody challenges him or holds him to a higher standard. Also, there’s just no way his dick games that good. THERE IS NO WAY.

JD is on the phone with Paula and SURPRISE, Craig basically didnt do shit for this festival yet still wants to be head of the bourbon division. The entitlement is strong with this one. Craigs phone is dead, party casualty, so JD is calling around to all Craigs friends like the angry dad he is. Did I mention this was dumb af, Craig?

Also, LMAO at how hungover they all look. Their hangovers are giving me life.

Craig: I just feel like Im being used to do all the bitchwork and its annoying. I lied, THIS is the whitest thing to happen on this show.

Shep: People take work too seriously. What happened to just drinking beer and laughing your balls off?

Yeah Shep, I think this may be why your restaurant is struggling to pay the rent.

Thomas and Kathryn are discussing the ins and outs of labor, which I will file away for future knowledge. Thomas calls Kathryn an expert at giving birth which is like, kind of rude lol. But I guess also accurate?

Kathryns opening up to Thomas about being alone this time around, looking up at him with big doe eyes, and Thomas is like,SHUT DOWN.

Thomas: The timing is really bad for me, could you just like, not give birth rn?

Kathryn: Thats why I like having you around, youre like a calming presence IDK why.

Kathryn, do you know what calming means? Im starting to think not.

Back at Whitneys, some massage therapist named Megan shows up, and Shep clearly has a boner.

Shep: So youre gonna give us all massages now?

Megan: Its like holding space to really connect more with yourself.

Shep is blatantly sexually harassing this poor girl. JFC. This is so creepy. Tone it the fuck down.

JD & Co. is launching his bourbon line at Charleston Cup, this horse race in Charleston. Craig is nowhere to be found, shockingly.

JD: Work isnt all roses and cherries. Sometimes its dirt and trenches.

Im putting that on a needlepoint for my office.

Sheps not going because his grandpa died. OK thats actually like, very sad. My condolences.

We will now resume with our regularly scheduled program of shit-talking.

Craig is taking forever to get readyCraig and Chad from are both the secret Betches interns.

Craig is hungover with an upset stomach and a sinus infection, which is literally what happens to me every time I drink. AKA right now. We’ll get through this, Craig. Emergen-c and green tea all mf day.

Cams like,

Craig apparently slept in and didnt do anything to help JD set up. Which, Im not surprised by, but again, is a really bad move for when youre trying to show initiative.

Cameran: #NewCraig is starting to run its course because at this point hes becoming #OldCraig

Dannis dropping some random whiskey fun facts and Craig is like, Fuck the bourbon division, Im not sure Craig is qualified to have any job at Gentry HQ, PERIOD. How the fuck is he going to be a lawyer if he never wants to do work? He’s gonna have a rude awakening if he ever makes it to first-year associate (I have heard).

Craig is there for all of two minutes and is already like, fuck this Im leaving.

Oh JK Craig didnt actually leave. JD gives a speech and what do you wanna bet Craig is gonna get shafted in this thank-you speech?

Wait for it..

BOOM. SHAFTED. I called it.

Cameran is so into this race its scary. How much money did she put down on that horse? Judging by her reaction to losing, Id say a lot.

Once again JD is dressed like a 1920s fat cat. Live your truth, JD.

JDs like, and Craig is like,

JD: Do you think you should have gone out of town? Craig: I mean Ive never had to give up a trip for a job so

Oh boy, Craig. I fear for you in the real world. I really do.

At Kathryns, she and Thomas are eating dinner. Kathryns going into labor tomorrow morning. I hope they dont actually film her birth. That would be kind of fucked.

Thomas: I want to have a traditional family, hear the shnookums running around, hear the house fill with laughter.

Lol, “shnookums” only makes me think of one thing:

Thomas: I still love Kathryn, I care about her but Im afraid a day of reckoning is forthcoming.

UH OH.

Kathryn asks Thomas how he feels and he says hes apprehensive and shes like, BRUH, FEEL APPREHENSIVE?!

Kathryn: If I say anything mean to you tomorrow just give me a free pass.

OK thats fair, she is giving birth and all.

Kathryn gets up and eats some generic brand Lucky Charms before giving birth. I take it all back, she really is struggling with money.

OK low blow. Sorry. Kind of.

Seeing the sheer amount of diapers in Kathryns house is enough to make me never forget to take my birth control.

Thomas: For some reason, maybe through divine intervention we were brought together. Steven Spielberg I believe said, Ive made a lot of movies, but my greatest creation of all was a child.

So I wonder at what point Thomas is gonna be like Who am I kidding, theyre gonna drag that out at least over the course of another epsiode.

OK enough shit-talking from me. That baby is cute. What did they name him?? How they gonna leave us hanging like that?

div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2), a.prevBody{display: none;}

Source: http://allofbeer.com/southern-charm-recap-can-they-get-any-more-white/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/03/16/southern-charm-recap-can-they-get-any-more-white/

[jimdsmith34]

Southern Charm Recap: Can They Get Any More White?

I have emerged from my two-day hangover solely to write this weeks recap. Guess killing brain cells is one of my hobbies now.

When we left off I wasnt sure if I was Team Kathryn or Team Whitney, and I dont think thats ever going to get resolved tbh. However, I did just notice Kathryns facial expression in the opening sequence more or less sums up her entire personality.

Thomas and JD, back at it again with the polo. Cause that ended really well the last time. Can they get any more white?

Whitney has some fruit salad and is making coffee and Larissas like, If that’s cooking, I’m about to be the next winner of.

Whitney trying to explain what going steady means to Larissa is pretty hilarious tho.

Kathryn andKody? Corey? Fuck, I forgetare getting a seaweed facial or some shit, AKA Bravo is pampering them so they can talk shit in style. Nice.

Kathryn is bummed that once she has her baby she has to go home alone with her two children.

Kathryn: Im a 24-year-old soon-to-be mother of two. If you dont think Im overwhelmed and nervous then you dont think.

Wow that was like, unnecessarily aggressive Kath.

Cooper? Cooper! Calls Thomas a 50-year-old playboy and is like,

Cooper: Instead of letting it frustrating you I just say let it strengthen you.

Cooper is the moral compass this show needs.

Meanwhile Thomas is sipping bourbon with JD on his porch because Kathryn really needs him.

JD: Hows the baby? Thomas: The doctor said fine… JD looks skeptical, because Im sure he knows better than a trained doctor.

JD: Kathryn moving up the due date seems awfully peculiarseems suspect.

JD is a regular Hardy Boy over here.

JD: I think women dont like being asked for paternity tests.

NO FUCKING SHIT.

JD is like, and Thomas is like, Its clear hes forgotten who hes about to have a kid with because Kathryn is NOT going to be down with Thomas basically accusing her of slutting it up and then trying to trap him into fatherhood. JUST SAYING.

Its date night with Craig and Naomie. Craig chooses going to L.A. over the biggest event for his company, because hes never been to L.A. before. And Craig wonders why hes not allowed to head a bourbon division. I don’t foresee this ending well AT ALL. Craig, youre a fucking idiot and for once Naomie is in the right to tell you youre fucking up.

Craig: Do you see how hard Im trying to justify this?

Yeah, because you KNOW YOURE IN THE WRONG. Thats literally what justification is.

Cameran and Landon meet up for a candle-making class and I am kind of jealous because that low-key sounds fun. Landons explaining her travel guide to Cam, so Im going to take a quick nap.

Cameran: I think its hard for Landon bc she was a typical Southern stereotype of the woman who got married young and was taken care of and she doesnt have that anymore.

Wait, how is this the first Im hearing of this failed first marriage? How has this NEVER come up before this season??

Cameran: So any man prospects? Landon: IDK not really its kind of sad and pathetic.

Landon is like Same tho. Cameran: Do you think the reason youre not meeting anyone is because you want something to work out with Shep? Landon:…Yeah

Cameran and I are both like, FINALLY!

*Cue a montage of them looking really couple-y* I’m rooting for you guys!

Landon brings up every middle schoolers dilemma which is that if she dates Shep, then shell lose him as a friend. Can we get like, a violin quartet to score some melodramatic music or something?

Craig and Shep make it to L.A. and Whitneys bachelor pad is sick. I guess this is what that Bravo money gets you. On an unrelated note, I have a very compelling idea for a new reality show, if you wanna get on board Bravo, Ill get you in at the ground level.

Craig: I wouldve had FOMO if I hadnt gotten to come out heresothanks.

Whitney: Meh whatevs

Whitney: #NewCraig has taken on this persona thats like, not chill dude.

Whitney basically lets it go with the caveat that he may never fully trust Craig again. Eh, Im sure theyll be fine.

Shep: You know when youre perfectly drunk and youre really good at pool? Is that like when Im really drunk and I think Im really good at dancing?

Classic Shmosby.

Larissa crashes the boys weekend which is not at all chill. Larissa is, I guess, the WGG of the group.

Shep: Should I change? I dont want to look all fratty and Southern.

Well that ship sailed like, approximately 36 years ago. Whitney makes a joke about waking up in the morning covered in blood and vomit. Was he secretly with me and my friends this weekend? Unclear. V. possible.

These two slutty-looking blondes show up and Shep is in fucking heaven. Craig low-key wants to kill himself.

Whitney: The goofy, disarming thing works in Charleston but not so much in L.A.

I’m sorry, Whitney, but who you callin goofy? You’re not exactly a chiseled Greek god over there. Whitney takes a casual shot at Craigs bourbon knowledge, or lack thereof, and now that hes gotten that off his chest this friendship is back on track.

The aftermath of Whitneys party looks a lot like the scene I dealt with Sunday morning. So, like, maybe they really were there.

Whitney: The marker of a good boys weekend is a pool of vomit with a partially digested meatball in the middle.

Whitney talks about how Shep didnt get any last night and Whitney said he had a meeting with Hand Solo which made me LOL.

Sheps like, and Im getting soooo mf sick of this trope. I am convinced Shep just acts this way because y’all expect him to be a fuckboy and nobody challenges him or holds him to a higher standard. Also, there’s just no way his dick games that good. THERE IS NO WAY.

JD is on the phone with Paula and SURPRISE, Craig basically didnt do shit for this festival yet still wants to be head of the bourbon division. The entitlement is strong with this one. Craigs phone is dead, party casualty, so JD is calling around to all Craigs friends like the angry dad he is. Did I mention this was dumb af, Craig?

Also, LMAO at how hungover they all look. Their hangovers are giving me life.

Craig: I just feel like Im being used to do all the bitchwork and its annoying. I lied, THIS is the whitest thing to happen on this show.

Shep: People take work too seriously. What happened to just drinking beer and laughing your balls off?

Yeah Shep, I think this may be why your restaurant is struggling to pay the rent.

Thomas and Kathryn are discussing the ins and outs of labor, which I will file away for future knowledge. Thomas calls Kathryn an expert at giving birth which is like, kind of rude lol. But I guess also accurate?

Kathryns opening up to Thomas about being alone this time around, looking up at him with big doe eyes, and Thomas is like,SHUT DOWN.

Thomas: The timing is really bad for me, could you just like, not give birth rn?

Kathryn: Thats why I like having you around, youre like a calming presence IDK why.

Kathryn, do you know what calming means? Im starting to think not.

Back at Whitneys, some massage therapist named Megan shows up, and Shep clearly has a boner.

Shep: So youre gonna give us all massages now?

Megan: Its like holding space to really connect more with yourself.

Shep is blatantly sexually harassing this poor girl. JFC. This is so creepy. Tone it the fuck down.

JD & Co. is launching his bourbon line at Charleston Cup, this horse race in Charleston. Craig is nowhere to be found, shockingly.

JD: Work isnt all roses and cherries. Sometimes its dirt and trenches.

Im putting that on a needlepoint for my office.

Sheps not going because his grandpa died. OK thats actually like, very sad. My condolences.

We will now resume with our regularly scheduled program of shit-talking.

Craig is taking forever to get readyCraig and Chad from are both the secret Betches interns.

Craig is hungover with an upset stomach and a sinus infection, which is literally what happens to me every time I drink. AKA right now. We’ll get through this, Craig. Emergen-c and green tea all mf day.

Cams like,

Craig apparently slept in and didnt do anything to help JD set up. Which, Im not surprised by, but again, is a really bad move for when youre trying to show initiative.

Cameran: #NewCraig is starting to run its course because at this point hes becoming #OldCraig

Dannis dropping some random whiskey fun facts and Craig is like, Fuck the bourbon division, Im not sure Craig is qualified to have any job at Gentry HQ, PERIOD. How the fuck is he going to be a lawyer if he never wants to do work? He’s gonna have a rude awakening if he ever makes it to first-year associate (I have heard).

Craig is there for all of two minutes and is already like, fuck this Im leaving.

Oh JK Craig didnt actually leave. JD gives a speech and what do you wanna bet Craig is gonna get shafted in this thank-you speech?

Wait for it..

BOOM. SHAFTED. I called it.

Cameran is so into this race its scary. How much money did she put down on that horse? Judging by her reaction to losing, Id say a lot.

Once again JD is dressed like a 1920s fat cat. Live your truth, JD.

JDs like, and Craig is like,

JD: Do you think you should have gone out of town? Craig: I mean Ive never had to give up a trip for a job so

Oh boy, Craig. I fear for you in the real world. I really do.

At Kathryns, she and Thomas are eating dinner. Kathryns going into labor tomorrow morning. I hope they dont actually film her birth. That would be kind of fucked.

Thomas: I want to have a traditional family, hear the shnookums running around, hear the house fill with laughter.

Lol, “shnookums” only makes me think of one thing:

Thomas: I still love Kathryn, I care about her but Im afraid a day of reckoning is forthcoming.

UH OH.

Kathryn asks Thomas how he feels and he says hes apprehensive and shes like, BRUH, FEEL APPREHENSIVE?!

Kathryn: If I say anything mean to you tomorrow just give me a free pass.

OK thats fair, she is giving birth and all.

Kathryn gets up and eats some generic brand Lucky Charms before giving birth. I take it all back, she really is struggling with money.

OK low blow. Sorry. Kind of.

Seeing the sheer amount of diapers in Kathryns house is enough to make me never forget to take my birth control.

Thomas: For some reason, maybe through divine intervention we were brought together. Steven Spielberg I believe said, Ive made a lot of movies, but my greatest creation of all was a child.

So I wonder at what point Thomas is gonna be like Who am I kidding, theyre gonna drag that out at least over the course of another epsiode.

OK enough shit-talking from me. That baby is cute. What did they name him?? How they gonna leave us hanging like that?

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source http://allofbeer.com/southern-charm-recap-can-they-get-any-more-white/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2018/03/southern-charm-recap-can-they-get-any.html

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Southern Charm Recap: Can They Get Any More White?

I have emerged from my two-day hangover solely to write this weeks recap. Guess killing brain cells is one of my hobbies now.

When we left off I wasnt sure if I was Team Kathryn or Team Whitney, and I dont think thats ever going to get resolved tbh. However, I did just notice Kathryns facial expression in the opening sequence more or less sums up her entire personality.

Thomas and JD, back at it again with the polo. Cause that ended really well the last time. Can they get any more white?

Whitney has some fruit salad and is making coffee and Larissas like, If that’s cooking, I’m about to be the next winner of.

Whitney trying to explain what going steady means to Larissa is pretty hilarious tho.

Kathryn andKody? Corey? Fuck, I forgetare getting a seaweed facial or some shit, AKA Bravo is pampering them so they can talk shit in style. Nice.

Kathryn is bummed that once she has her baby she has to go home alone with her two children.

Kathryn: Im a 24-year-old soon-to-be mother of two. If you dont think Im overwhelmed and nervous then you dont think.

Wow that was like, unnecessarily aggressive Kath.

Cooper? Cooper! Calls Thomas a 50-year-old playboy and is like,

Cooper: Instead of letting it frustrating you I just say let it strengthen you.

Cooper is the moral compass this show needs.

Meanwhile Thomas is sipping bourbon with JD on his porch because Kathryn really needs him.

JD: Hows the baby? Thomas: The doctor said fine… JD looks skeptical, because Im sure he knows better than a trained doctor.

JD: Kathryn moving up the due date seems awfully peculiarseems suspect.

JD is a regular Hardy Boy over here.

JD: I think women dont like being asked for paternity tests.

NO FUCKING SHIT.

JD is like, and Thomas is like, Its clear hes forgotten who hes about to have a kid with because Kathryn is NOT going to be down with Thomas basically accusing her of slutting it up and then trying to trap him into fatherhood. JUST SAYING.

Its date night with Craig and Naomie. Craig chooses going to L.A. over the biggest event for his company, because hes never been to L.A. before. And Craig wonders why hes not allowed to head a bourbon division. I don’t foresee this ending well AT ALL. Craig, youre a fucking idiot and for once Naomie is in the right to tell you youre fucking up.

Craig: Do you see how hard Im trying to justify this?

Yeah, because you KNOW YOURE IN THE WRONG. Thats literally what justification is.

Cameran and Landon meet up for a candle-making class and I am kind of jealous because that low-key sounds fun. Landons explaining her travel guide to Cam, so Im going to take a quick nap.

Cameran: I think its hard for Landon bc she was a typical Southern stereotype of the woman who got married young and was taken care of and she doesnt have that anymore.

Wait, how is this the first Im hearing of this failed first marriage? How has this NEVER come up before this season??

Cameran: So any man prospects? Landon: IDK not really its kind of sad and pathetic.

Landon is like Same tho. Cameran: Do you think the reason youre not meeting anyone is because you want something to work out with Shep? Landon:…Yeah

Cameran and I are both like, FINALLY!

*Cue a montage of them looking really couple-y* I’m rooting for you guys!

Landon brings up every middle schoolers dilemma which is that if she dates Shep, then shell lose him as a friend. Can we get like, a violin quartet to score some melodramatic music or something?

Craig and Shep make it to L.A. and Whitneys bachelor pad is sick. I guess this is what that Bravo money gets you. On an unrelated note, I have a very compelling idea for a new reality show, if you wanna get on board Bravo, Ill get you in at the ground level.

Craig: I wouldve had FOMO if I hadnt gotten to come out heresothanks.

Whitney: Meh whatevs

Whitney: #NewCraig has taken on this persona thats like, not chill dude.

Whitney basically lets it go with the caveat that he may never fully trust Craig again. Eh, Im sure theyll be fine.

Shep: You know when youre perfectly drunk and youre really good at pool? Is that like when Im really drunk and I think Im really good at dancing?

Classic Shmosby.

Larissa crashes the boys weekend which is not at all chill. Larissa is, I guess, the WGG of the group.

Shep: Should I change? I dont want to look all fratty and Southern.

Well that ship sailed like, approximately 36 years ago. Whitney makes a joke about waking up in the morning covered in blood and vomit. Was he secretly with me and my friends this weekend? Unclear. V. possible.

These two slutty-looking blondes show up and Shep is in fucking heaven. Craig low-key wants to kill himself.

Whitney: The goofy, disarming thing works in Charleston but not so much in L.A.

I’m sorry, Whitney, but who you callin goofy? You’re not exactly a chiseled Greek god over there. Whitney takes a casual shot at Craigs bourbon knowledge, or lack thereof, and now that hes gotten that off his chest this friendship is back on track.

The aftermath of Whitneys party looks a lot like the scene I dealt with Sunday morning. So, like, maybe they really were there.

Whitney: The marker of a good boys weekend is a pool of vomit with a partially digested meatball in the middle.

Whitney talks about how Shep didnt get any last night and Whitney said he had a meeting with Hand Solo which made me LOL.

Sheps like, and Im getting soooo mf sick of this trope. I am convinced Shep just acts this way because y’all expect him to be a fuckboy and nobody challenges him or holds him to a higher standard. Also, there’s just no way his dick games that good. THERE IS NO WAY.

JD is on the phone with Paula and SURPRISE, Craig basically didnt do shit for this festival yet still wants to be head of the bourbon division. The entitlement is strong with this one. Craigs phone is dead, party casualty, so JD is calling around to all Craigs friends like the angry dad he is. Did I mention this was dumb af, Craig?

Also, LMAO at how hungover they all look. Their hangovers are giving me life.

Craig: I just feel like Im being used to do all the bitchwork and its annoying. I lied, THIS is the whitest thing to happen on this show.

Shep: People take work too seriously. What happened to just drinking beer and laughing your balls off?

Yeah Shep, I think this may be why your restaurant is struggling to pay the rent.

Thomas and Kathryn are discussing the ins and outs of labor, which I will file away for future knowledge. Thomas calls Kathryn an expert at giving birth which is like, kind of rude lol. But I guess also accurate?

Kathryns opening up to Thomas about being alone this time around, looking up at him with big doe eyes, and Thomas is like,SHUT DOWN.

Thomas: The timing is really bad for me, could you just like, not give birth rn?

Kathryn: Thats why I like having you around, youre like a calming presence IDK why.

Kathryn, do you know what calming means? Im starting to think not.

Back at Whitneys, some massage therapist named Megan shows up, and Shep clearly has a boner.

Shep: So youre gonna give us all massages now?

Megan: Its like holding space to really connect more with yourself.

Shep is blatantly sexually harassing this poor girl. JFC. This is so creepy. Tone it the fuck down.

JD & Co. is launching his bourbon line at Charleston Cup, this horse race in Charleston. Craig is nowhere to be found, shockingly.

JD: Work isnt all roses and cherries. Sometimes its dirt and trenches.

Im putting that on a needlepoint for my office.

Sheps not going because his grandpa died. OK thats actually like, very sad. My condolences.

We will now resume with our regularly scheduled program of shit-talking.

Craig is taking forever to get readyCraig and Chad from are both the secret Betches interns.

Craig is hungover with an upset stomach and a sinus infection, which is literally what happens to me every time I drink. AKA right now. We’ll get through this, Craig. Emergen-c and green tea all mf day.

Cams like,

Craig apparently slept in and didnt do anything to help JD set up. Which, Im not surprised by, but again, is a really bad move for when youre trying to show initiative.

Cameran: #NewCraig is starting to run its course because at this point hes becoming #OldCraig

Dannis dropping some random whiskey fun facts and Craig is like, Fuck the bourbon division, Im not sure Craig is qualified to have any job at Gentry HQ, PERIOD. How the fuck is he going to be a lawyer if he never wants to do work? He’s gonna have a rude awakening if he ever makes it to first-year associate (I have heard).

Craig is there for all of two minutes and is already like, fuck this Im leaving.

Oh JK Craig didnt actually leave. JD gives a speech and what do you wanna bet Craig is gonna get shafted in this thank-you speech?

Wait for it..

BOOM. SHAFTED. I called it.

Cameran is so into this race its scary. How much money did she put down on that horse? Judging by her reaction to losing, Id say a lot.

Once again JD is dressed like a 1920s fat cat. Live your truth, JD.

JDs like, and Craig is like,

JD: Do you think you should have gone out of town? Craig: I mean Ive never had to give up a trip for a job so

Oh boy, Craig. I fear for you in the real world. I really do.

At Kathryns, she and Thomas are eating dinner. Kathryns going into labor tomorrow morning. I hope they dont actually film her birth. That would be kind of fucked.

Thomas: I want to have a traditional family, hear the shnookums running around, hear the house fill with laughter.

Lol, “shnookums” only makes me think of one thing:

Thomas: I still love Kathryn, I care about her but Im afraid a day of reckoning is forthcoming.

UH OH.

Kathryn asks Thomas how he feels and he says hes apprehensive and shes like, BRUH, FEEL APPREHENSIVE?!

Kathryn: If I say anything mean to you tomorrow just give me a free pass.

OK thats fair, she is giving birth and all.

Kathryn gets up and eats some generic brand Lucky Charms before giving birth. I take it all back, she really is struggling with money.

OK low blow. Sorry. Kind of.

Seeing the sheer amount of diapers in Kathryns house is enough to make me never forget to take my birth control.

Thomas: For some reason, maybe through divine intervention we were brought together. Steven Spielberg I believe said, Ive made a lot of movies, but my greatest creation of all was a child.

So I wonder at what point Thomas is gonna be like Who am I kidding, theyre gonna drag that out at least over the course of another epsiode.

OK enough shit-talking from me. That baby is cute. What did they name him?? How they gonna leave us hanging like that?

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from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/southern-charm-recap-can-they-get-any-more-white/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/171944066947