#{but if jude accepts bass' offer then} | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

a-swines-baptism · 4 years ago

Note

🎂 [hewo I'm coming with either Samuel or Bass, whoever you prefer :3]

If we’re mutuals, send 🎂 and I’ll make you a treat!

{For this treat, @the-bastard-entity, I’m going to give us a look at one of many possible futures. Nothing nsfw, but cut for length.}

Amanda was a terribly good killer when she wanted to be. Some killers take too long to get to the kill, some play with their food, and some take the time to try and fraternize with their prey-- though a correction is always quick to follow those contemptible few. But the Pig, she’s industrious. Head down, methodical, ruthless. Even when she toys with the Survivors, placing those brutal deathtraps on their head, it’s always efficient. Not unlike a butcher, just another day at the slaughterhouse. Frankly, it’s for this reason that the upstart Entity usually doesn’t pay all that much attention to her trials. They just aren’t nearly as entertaining as they could be-- and they could be amazing. Her mind is built for cruelty in such a unique and special capacity. But with the attitude she carries out her games with, even watching the timer on a trapped mask go off and rip someone’s jaws apart can get old. The only exceptions seem to be when Jude’s involved. Seeing the way they have to dance around conflict with each other, it’s very dramatic. Pulls at the heartstrings, and when they’re placed on opposite sides like this there’s at least a chance for a trial worth watching. Otherwise, it’s just... old hat.

Anyways, his angel’s not there now. In the trial, that is. There’s no reason for the Entity to be watching Amanda go through the motions again, beyond the slight sliver of awareness he holds across the entire Fog. Or at least, that’s how it seems at first. The only thing that keys him off to any difference is a faint pulse of displeasure, coming from one of their fellow Entities... whichever one of their kin the Pig happens to be feeding this time, no one they’re familiar with. It’s a simple task to shift his awareness away from his personal realm, like looking over one’s shoulder-- and he’s greeted with a grisly spectacle as the pig-headed killer punches her knife through the hand of a screaming survivor, nailing it to their throat and twisting the blade for good measure. A memento mori... from her of all people? Now this is unusual.

As he watches, the Pig stands from her kill and starts to chase after the next one... and kills him the same way. And then the third meets the same fate. The Entity can feel frustration pouring off his brethren, denied food like this, but his interest is too piqued to do anything but watch as she runs down the last victim. What is she doing, what would possess her to break from her habits so hard...? The Pig’s cornered the last survivor now, and this time she pauses before doing anything. Looks around, locks eyes with the nearby crow that the Entity is currently watching through. And then she places a bear trap over their head, sets the timer, and with a deft stroke draws her blade deep across both their wrists.

Now he gets it. Somewhat.

Curiosity piqued, the Entity lets himself draw inwards, appearing out of the fog as the trial evaporates and standing behind Amanda. “That was quite the show,” he remarks, a smug grin pulling across his face as she turns to face him. “I’m sure you’ll be paying for it later. But I’ll admit I’m a little curious, what’s got you trying to attract my attention like this, little piggy?” He half-expects her to bull rush him any moment, not that it would end well for her. The killer is nothing if not headstrong, after all, especially when it comes to what she hates. But the attack doesn’t come; instead, there’s a moment of silence. “Go on, say your piece,” he prompts after a moment of staring down her pale blue eyes through her mask, his own golden eyes narrowed in a mixture of curiosity and amusement. “You went through all this trouble to get me here, there’s no point in wasting each other’s time like this.��

There’s another beat of silence, shorter this time, before she speaks. “Do you like Jude?” There’s a hesitance in her voice, blunting the usual aggression (although it’s certainly still there). “--Not as a plaything, either, you know what I mean.” He raises an eyebrow at the question, the faintest hint of laughter behind his words. “Amanda, dear, I know you hate me, but you can’t possibly be getting jealous, can y--” “Answer the fucking question.” She cuts him off, actually taking the young god aback the slightest bit. Not because of her nerve, but because of the odd lack of malice in her voice. “--Please. I know you’re gonna fuck with me, I know that’s what you do, but I’m asking for a reason. Tell me.” That’s all. No insults, no smartass comments, she’s actually minding herself for once. It’s odd, just adding to the pile of oddness that this entire encounter is. And the Entity finds himself pausing, actually considering her question— purely out of curiosity, mind. He wants to know where she’s going with this.

“Jude is many things... beautiful. Fiery. So very sweet, I’m sure you’d agree with all that,” he responds, tapping his chin idly in mock thoughtfulness. “He is many wonderful things, and these things outweigh his annoyances. So I would say I am fond of him. Does that satisfy you?” He grins a smug, condescending grin as he regards the curious killer. “I’m an Entity, piggy. Caring about his kind is like asking you to care for an ant. But I am fond of him, sure.” Amanda seems to process this for a second, before she sighs and shakes her head. “Fine, then are you ever going to punish him again?” Her tone is still as unusually controlled, but the Entity can hear loathing pulse under the skin of her words. Again, a strange question, doesn’t she understand what he is? Granted... well, surely Jude’s learned by now. “...Not unless it was required.” Hardly a guarantee, hardly safe. But as good as one could expect from such a god. “Now it’s your turn to answer a question, though. Why does anything I say about it matter? Sure, you’re scared for Jude, but your mind’s already made up on me, isn’t it? Tell me, Amanda, what warrants all this?” He gestures again to the trialground, to the bodies.

There’s a very long pause before she speaks. “Yeah, my mind’s made up on you. Kind of hard to feel anything besides hate after you did... what you did, to both of us. To him.” She stops, hesitating. “--But for some reason, whatever you did to him... he can’t feel the same way. I see that, and... I don’t fucking know, maybe this is me feeling like I can keep him safe? Or make things easier... I don’t know. But the fucking tension here is gonna get him hurt one way or another, so... I have to do this.” She seems to direct the last bit at herself, before raising her hands and clenching them nervously. Snap, out comes the blade, and the Entity just watches, bemused. A long claw spiders quietly out of the ground behind her, tensing to strike--

And then she relaxes her hands, and the knife withdraws. And she’s left with her hands up, a gesture of surrender. And it’s just enough of a surprise to cause the readied talon to pause. “--I want to be your killer. If he’s going to go with you... I’m not letting him go alone.” The fog is quiet. And the Entity has a choice.

#[the pig speaks]#[meat to slaughter]#the-bastard-entity #{gods I hope that's an okay ending my brain has been burnt the *fuck* out}#{but if jude accepts bass' offer then}#{well}

8 notes · View notes

verryberriess · 4 years ago

Text

Reason

Rating: M (for drugs and alcohol)

Synopsis: Truths are laid bare when alcohol and drugs get into the mix.

Thanks to bestie @maastrash for edits and being awesome and always encouraging me in life BAHHAHAHA

Cardan churned his head around in a daze. He couldn’t help but lean his head against the table. Sectioned off in the upper level, his booth allowed him an expansive view of the dance floor.

His cheek laid against the cool surface of the table as he peered downwards to the lower level, observing the mob dancing and mingling while his brain swam in colors. Whether the indistinguishable shapes in his vision were due to the alcohol or the colored lights from the club itself, he wasn’t able to discern the difference between them at the moment. Despite the booming of the bass in the club, he had the drugs to thank for he was in a happy, happy daze. His fae senses only saw and heard a muffled version of the chaos around him.

Except, now he felt a spike in energy.

Abruptly, he rose from his seat at the booth, hitting his knee against the rim of the table in the process. Smooth.

“Cardan, where are you off to?” Locke asked.

“It is time I join the revel, now that it is at its peak.” Cardan announced groggily. He stumbled his way out of the booth. He could hear Nicassia’s muffled tones of protest behind him, but didn’t care to acknowledge her whimpers.

He gripped the handrail of the stairs tightly. His fingers squeezed the metal at intervals, trying to make his descent as slowly as he could. Elderberry vodka and mirthroot clouded his senses. The combination was too strong for his fae blood to metabolize quickly enough, but Cardan took in that fact with appreciation.

He was finally able to make his way down the stairs and was soon joined by two nymphs. The two leaned against his frame and looped themselves around his biceps. He looked down at their faces, scrutinizing their features. One of the nymphs had a too-large nose and overzealous blush; she purred seductively and blinked whimsically at him. The other pushed her breasts up against him, her clawlike limbs grazed him in a playful manner. Cardan didn’t mind their advances, probably due to the fog in his mind that clouded much of his reason, but he wanted to get into the crowd, and “dance the night away” to rid himself of the events of today.

With the two nymphs dangling from his form, he eased them towards the mob. He felt one of the nymphs tug on his arm and with a breath of honey wine, she whispered, “Prince, instead of going into the throng of revelers, shall we escort ourselves into some place… more private?”

Cardan paid no heed and continued his way through the crowd that parted in tune to his entrance. He allowed himself to sink into the rhythm of the dance floor. He closed his eyes, immersing himself into the music that was still muffled, the colored lights that flashed insistently, and the groove of bodies that rocked to and against him.

Someone tapped his shoulder. Cardan opened up his eyes to perceive a lit, tightly-rolled joint of mirthroot displayed in between fingers extended out to him. He didn’t care who had offered it to him, but he sensed that his high was coming to an end, so he took the mirthroot and placed it in between his lips and inhaled. He felt it invade his lungs and further clutter his brain in the midst of the effects of the substances he had taken earlier. Exhaling, he instantly felt at ease, letting himself loosen. Cardan placed his arms around the two nymphs and pulled them closer against him, positioning them so he was in between the two of them, ignoring their eager gasps as he placed himself at the rear of one of the nymphs. He rolled his body against the two of them, wanting to feel the friction of their bodies against his.

Cardan opened his eyes slightly, surveying the chaos of bodies and the savage energy of the crowd. While he rocked against the bodies against him, he inspected the individuals surrounding him with the little slip of reason he had left. He caught sight of some individual with auburn hair, styled in a horn updo and curls that cascaded down the back of her form. His eyesight perked up a bit and his mind sharpened. He gave a push to the nymphs around him and met them with a glare to their protest. They immediately scattered.

He pushed further in vexation, dismissing scowls and venomous eyes. He had disturbed their highs and disordered the movement of the dancing, but his mind had sharpened towards only one goal at the moment, so he ignored the disapproval of those around him without much thought. The alcohol and mirthroot in his veins both furthered and hindered his resolve. It furthered him towards the direction of those auburn curls without discretion, but hindered him in which he acted before he could fully gather at what he was exactly doing.

He finally made it towards her.

Golden glitter smeared the eyelids and cheekbones of her feminine face. Painted in a dazzling, cherry tint, her lips slightly parted as if breathing in the energy of the crowd. She moved in tune with the music and Cardan, who didn’t care that he stood at the mercy of the rock of the crowd that shoved and bumped him, was finally able to take in her full form. She looked amazing, ethereal almost, despite the lawlessness of the room. Her tiny, skin tight teal blue dress clung to her curvy form; its neckline plunged in a deep V that showed off the cleavage of her breasts. Cardan was in awe. He almost always saw Jude in court dresses that although cinched her waist, flared down the length of her legs so they, unfortunately, couldn’t be seen. The sight before him left him without breath, immobilized him, and heart speeding.

He stumbled towards Jude further. Right now, reason was his foe. He was aware of Jude’s hostility towards him, but courage and stupidity currently fueled him. He now stood before her, and placed his hands upon her exposed shoulders.

Cardan watched Jude slowly rise from the hypnotic rhythm of the room. She must have taken something as well. He watched as her eyes gradually met his and further examined the blown pupils of her eyes. Cardan, too, was in a drunken stupor, so before he could stop himself, he lamented, “Jude…”

Cardan watched her, drinking in the sight of her in this way. There was some kind of tension between them that was better left unspoken of.

They were in the middle of the dance floor, but this time, the surrounding mix of fae and human dared not to get in the prince’s way again, lest they wanted their wings ripped out. Cardan silently thanked his reputation for allowing him to savor this moment.

Jude unexpectedly met him with a sad attempt of a glare but continued to sway her hips to the beat of the bass, “Cardan, stop staring.”

To his chagrin, his brain had failed him. His brain had shut off, he could barely form a word, until he spouted indignantly, “Did you think you could escape me? I can spot you from miles away.”

“You have no reason to bother me here. Stop your glowering, your narrowing eyes.” Despite whatever substances were within her system, Cardan was surprised at the proficiency and fight in her speech.

“And if I want to continue to admire the dullness of your being?” He countered.

Cardan focused further on Jude’s face. He could imagine the amount of concentration that it took for her to focus on him, his own head pounded from its desire to be left to idleness again.

So he obliged it. He let his body do the talking: surrounded her frame within his and placed his hands around her hips. He let them settle there for a few moments, giving Jude time to pull away or not. Unexpectedly, she had pulled him in further, accepting his gesture. Her hands slid up and down his body, feeling the rich fabric of his blouse, attending to the gemstones that rimmed the lining with little touches. In response, Cardan’s hands grazed down Jude’s figure, rested on the cup of her ass, and squeezed. He grabbed her ass and brought Jude closer to him, angling his body so that he fit against her frame perfectly. Her forehead fell into his chest and her hands were tangled in his hair this time, fiddling with his black strands.

Cardan felt a modest tug, so he looked downwards towards Jude. He took in her suddenly shy exterior, and was caught off guard when Jude came towards him and united them at their lips. Those cherry soft things that parted when she spoke left a bit of residue of golden gloss that stained his own. He felt a sort of vigor that abolished any sort of influence that was on him. His mind was clear, and now only focused on one thing: the mortal woman in front of him that pulled him out of his drunkenness and foolery. This kiss was like a sort of message, and he loved it so much. Felt addicted to decipher the code behind this unfamiliar language between them. He pressed himself harder against her: his lips against hers, her body against him. Those damned lips parted again and Cardan let himself in. It was another battle between them, fueled by uncovered truths and drugs and alcohol and the scent of sweat and heat that circulated around them.

The two came off of each other, only to catch their breaths. Panting, their hot breaths added to the already warm air. Cardan wasn’t intoxicated anymore. He was far from it. And glad. Glad that he was going to be able to remember this moment in full. While Cardan held Jude at her sides, breathing heavily, she whispered, “Kiss me, kiss me until I am sick of it.”

Cardan turned Jude around so he faced her back. He ground himself against her, rolling themselves akin to the music. He clasped his hands around her middle. No escape. He bent his head at the crook of her neck and leaned in, starting to kiss along Jude’s jaw and down the length of her neck to the exposed space of her collar bones. They fell into the cadence of the crowd in that moment. Their bodies rolled against each other accordingly.

Cardan felt Jude reach up towards him, her height angled so that she reached his ear and whispered, “I am so high.” Cardan could hear the smile in her words, the purr of her whisper had sent him into a shiver.

“What did you take, sweet Jude?” Cardan whispered into her hair.

“Nevermore,” Jude breathed. Nevermore was a white powdery substance that was to be inhaled through the nose, intended for faerie use. For faeries, it was strong. Cardan could not comprehend the extent of Jude’s response to the hard drug, how she was still standing and speaking right now, nor of however she had gotten a hold of it.

But Cardan felt a little sad, however. Was she standing before him because she was lost in its effects? Would she remember this encounter at the end of tonight, tomorrow? Must he go back and sneer at Jude tomorrow, forgetting this momentous tryst between them?

Cardan held Jude within his arms. He didn’t care that his court saw him mingling with the human girl he used to taunt, that the crowd had pretended to ignore the spectacle between them only seconds ago. He just wanted to cherish how this feeling felt. How being wanted felt.

“Jude,” Cardan spoke softly.

He felt movement within his arms, as Jude suddenly slackened.

Tag list: @maastrash @b00kworm @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln

85 notes · View notes

blairwaldcrf · 4 years ago

Text

if you know me, no you don’t - dan/nate 2k

Summary: dan/nate alternate to episode 4x02 from Nate's perspective for @bisexualdanhumphrey

Comment and read here on Ao3

Notes: we're pretending here that dan hasn't told lily/rufus yet thanks

-------------------------

Nate Archibald, for better or worse, knew Chuck Bass better than few people on the Upper East Side ever would or could. (Or, especially after the spring, wanted to). This is why he isn’t surprised when the not so little black book contains the contact info of more than females. What does surprise Nate is that he’s almost tempted to use them. He doesn’t. Gossip Girl is always watching, after all. But it tempts him, and the fact he’s tempted at all makes him have more than two girls over one night ala a foursome that tires him out for more than a day.

But being tired doesn’t fix things any more than trying to dry his hair without an expensive blow dryer. So, one night after he finishes his routine call with Dan in a bar outside of the city and on the outskirts of Chuck’s usual haunts where he’s sure he can get away with it, he hooks up with a handsome brunette.

Nate pretends he isn’t nervous as they kiss, and indeed kissing does help the usual process begin anyway, but Victor-- at least filed under said name in the book-- gives him a smile as he pulls away. “We don’t have to do anything, you know.”

Maybe it’s the permission to just be that makes him finally give in, but within less than a full minute of saying a finally confident “I want to.” they’re in bed and the broken ice lends itself into something much, much hotter.

Nate had expected things to be both more simple and fast than they were. While he was good enough at foreplay with women, he’d been told it was required by Victor in instances like this. Not that he’s complaining, but it does happen to relate to the fact that he feels more comfortable staying in the bed for a moment in the afterglow of the climax

“I’m not gay, you know.” Nate says slowly, staring at the ceiling. “Not that there’s anything wrong with-- I just mean I really enjoy sex with women and--,”

“Do you think your friend is gay?” Victor asks, an odd expression on his face.

“Chuck?” Nate laughs. “God, no. He’s just-- I mean he’s just Chuck. Pleasure-seeking doesn’t exactly have limits with him.”

Looking for an answer he can’t seem to find, Victor shrugs. “Maybe you’re just seeking pleasure too.”

Confusion is key to Serena Vanderwoodsen breakups, so who was he to say Victor is wrong? Hadn’t he already upped his body count by well more than a dozen in said name of pleasure seeking? According to Serena’s brother Eric, gaydar was a thing and both he and Victor would know well more than Nate about this.

Lamely, he tries to agree. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s it. Just trying things out.”

Victor gives him a discerning look that makes Nate jump out of bed in a way he pretended was nonchalant. Nate gives the same easy laugh and pretty smile he gave to all the people who try to claim he’s deeper than a pretty face and left the building feeling more brooding than he had before entering. A little bitterly, he had notes he hadn’t even made it through the alphabet in Chuck’s book and was already a different person like Chuck had unknowingly promised.

-----------

Juliet Sharp comes as a happy surprise to Nate, an interruption to the increasing craziness he had gotten himself into by worrying too much about his own sexuality. Hard to get like Blair, a coy smile like Serena, and an interesting twist of not being a part of the Gossip Girl elite like usual. When in doubt, let a bossy woman figure it out.

The problem, it turns out, is that she wants to take Dan out from the running for Serena’s heart and while Nate had to admit it would serve Dan a little right after the kiss he doesn’t want to do it. Not really. Still, he lets himself listen to her as easy as if he was listening to Blair back at St. Jude’s. Things are simpler that way, aren’t they? If loving someone as free and accepting as Serena had gotten him cheated on with someone like Dan who knew his own purpose in life so easily, fuck it. Maybe meddling would help.

Seeing Dan is much different than talking on the phone, though. Especially with the singing the Brooklyn guy must take after his mother for. While Dan is no lyricist when it comes to lullabies it seems, he is quite possibly the most adorable thing Nate had seen in awhile and he laughs in a free and familiar way that surprised him after a summer of escaping all family and friends.

Offered Milo, Nate panics. Is he supposed to know what to do with an actual baby? Is he holding him correctly? Sure, he had been around infant cousins before, but those were ones taken care of by nannies just like he was. How was Dan doing this, Georgina? Did that crazy woman even have a maternal bone in her body?

When Juliet takes Milo and Nate gets the chance to be alone with Dan for the first time since they shared a living space, it’s now there. That horribly familiar tug that made Nate nervous every time he felt it. Once upon a time he had felt it when trying desperately not to love Serena the almost entirety of being with Blair, and also now, faced with the one person who had been the ruin of him and Serena in the first place.

After living with Dan he knows things about the “lonely boy” one might miss. That he always wore plaid when he was especially stressed, as if it was a comfort blanket after years in Brooklyn. That if you unplugged his laptop from his charger for any reason he would immediately be angry that it might die and unsave his already thrice saved writing. That he especially hated the Italian place on the corner of his actual favorite spot because they had been racist to Vanessa. That he would normally have dark circles under his eyes after writing too long through the night on black coffee.

Most of all, he notices that all those things are currently at odds, unplugged charger and all, and that Dan was drowning in the midst of Nate thinking that his newly activated sex life was demanding.

“Are you okay?” he asks, knowing the answer. “I mean--,”

“Oh, this?” Dan laughs sarcastically now that Juliet is out of sight. “Absolutely not. But you know, what other choice do I have?”

“Tell your dad and Lily like I said.” Nate repeats, trying to give the good advice no one ever took him seriously for. Then, with a charming smile: “Afford a babysitter, or even a maid, every now and then.”

“Thanks,” is the flat response, but Dan’s lips had fought a smile for a second.

Nate smiles further, pulling the same response out of Dan slowly but surely. “Come on, man. You should know after years of Gossip Girl secrets always add badly. Especially the ones involving Georgina of all people.”

“Yeah, I know.” Dan nods, sounding so tired. “But right now I can live in my bubble where I just take care of Milo and have Georgina barking orders at me and no one else can tell me what a mess I’ve made.”

“Did that sound already as bad to you as it did to me out loud?” Nate asks.

Dan did laugh this time. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean Milo isn’t the mess, don’t get me wrong, it’s just I didn’t exactly envision this as my life. I was at least supposed to finish my second year of college.”

“I know.” Nate said, and he did. Because while Dan had the privilege of connections to so much wealth and ease of life, he’d never take them anymore than Nate would want to. They both had the same pride and respect for work each other did, Nate admits, it was just that Dan followed through while Nate tended to flounder.

“Have you spoken to Serena?”

Looking surprised at the mention of the name, Dan shakes his head. “We haven’t talked all summer, she’s doing her Paris thing and I didn’t want her to hear Milo in the background. Why? Did she talk to you?”

“No,” Nate says. He’d hoped the one thing that had always kept them at odds would still be available to push him further yet again. “No, she didn’t. I just wondered. Gossip Girl said she was coming back to go to Columbia.”

“Oh wow.” Dan considers, looking less hurt than the guy who had kissed said girl should have. “That’s-- I don’t know, that’s weird. Shouldn’t she have said something to either of us?”

Nate shrugs. “I don’t know, it’s Serena.”

With an agreeing nod, Dan answers Juliet’s call for yet another diaper change-- how often did babies really need to be changed?-- and the all too pretty girl came in to see him spy on Dan’s phone and spot the text from Serena.

For Serena and I, he tells himself as he lets Juliet begin a Blair-worthy scheme, but reality has never let him lie to himself for long.

The moment he sees Vanessa cuddle up to Dan like they’re married and Milo is their perfect newborn baby, he can’t help but stop pretending. As observant as Juliet is, she doesn’t know Nate, not really. All she can see is an archetype that she wants to believe in after knowing him for less than even a week. It’s all too easy to let her and pretend that his brooding glare at them is nothing more than anger at Dan for Serena, at least until Juliet’s lie involves Vanessa being shoved at Dan. Telling Juliet to stop, that he isn’t willing that will break hearts isn’t a lie.

… But maybe it was easier to pretend he was having a noble change of heart than to admit how completely jealous he didn't want to be.

So when Juliet says that Vanessa and Dan had been a great couple, Nate forces himself to admit that of all the former couples on the Upper East Side-- or ones by extension-- Dan and Vanessa had always made the most sense. Grounded Brooklyn loner thing aside, she still had more in common with him than Nate could ever hope to, so if Juliet thought Dan could be happier with her then who was he to stop them?

--------------

When Dan texts him I know what you told Vanessa, he leaves Juliet waiting without a thought. On the limo ride over, all he can think is how to explain things, what to say, anything to try and figure out how he absolutely could tell Dan that he was sorry without explaining the true reason he did things. Serena, he reminded himself. Just use Serena.

“Let me explain,” he opens with to Dan the second he enters the apartment and can see Dan’s characteristically judging glare, trying, “You two spent the whole day alone together and seemed like you were connecting--,”

“We weren’t alone, we were with you and Juliet.” Dan argues in a whisper.

“Why are we whispering?”

“Milo is sleeping for once. Why did you lie about me?”

Nate tries not to let his stomach drop as he directly asks. “Was it a lie?”

Surely he didn’t have to go through this again, right? Nate has tried desperately to sleep through Manhattan and still have good karma-- his expenses on every one night stand’s breakfast proved so in his opinion-- but here he is, dreading the one word that Dan says next.

“Is this about Serena?” Dan asks, looking confused. “It is, isn’t it.”

“I wouldn’t have even said anything if you hadn’t lied about getting that text from her!” Nate sidesteps.

Dan blinks at him, brow furrowed. “What text?”

“I-- When was the last time you checked your phone?”

God, everyone is right. I am an idiot. Nate thinks harshly at himself. Of course Dan hadn’t done literally anything normal when he was so wrapped up in Milo, takeout, and the disturbing Georgina.

With a glare, Dan snaps, “Obviously not as recently as you have.”

“I’m sorry, Dan. I saw the text and I--,”

Rolling his eyes and putting his phone back in his pocket, Dan sighs. “You’re sorry. I know.”

“Honestly, I don’t even know how I feel about Serena, I just--,” Nate fumbles, still feeling ashamed and embarrassed.

“You don’t have to say it.”

The forgiveness is so ready and kind that Nate has to admit he’s a little taken aback. He isn’t sure when he and Dan had reached that point, the kind where the tension of competition could ease back into friendship. Once Nate had thought he had that with Chuck before he’d really taken a look at who his friend had become. Even then, though, the tension had never been quite the same. “I think I do. You’ve been there for me through all of last year, and--,”

“And I kissed Serena when you two were dating. I honestly probably deserved something.” Dan offers. “Look, if anyone understands the craziness involved with having feelings for her it’s me.”

“That’s not what it was about.” Nate huffs before catching himself, unable to take back the words now they’re in the air. He’d been so frustrated with the situation, with his life, with who he was both becoming yet wanted to be that he had slipped. “I mean--,”

“What was it then, Georgina?”

“No, of course not!”

“Then what, Nate?”

Dan’s brow is furrowed in the way he doesn’t realize is attractive, and in the midst of the quiet argument they had become closer in the necessity of hearing each other, but still not close enough to bridge the gap Nate is terrified of. Praying that Milo wakes up doesn’t work, and he’s worried that if he walks out now it will seem like even more of a big thing than he wants to pretend it isn’t.

A charming smile won’t work this time. Even as he tries the casual shrug, he can see Dan begin to give a condescending glare to try and pull the truth out. Nate sighs and looks at the ceiling. “Can we just pretend I said nothing and I’ll owe you a favor?”

“Do I look like Blair Waldorf?” Dan scoffs. “Nate, whatever it is just tell me. Nothing’s going to be crazier than finding out Georgina and I made a child together.”

“Wanna bet?” Nate half-laughs.

The confusion dramatically turns to concern at that, and before the brunette could think he had another horrible secret hanging over him, Nate throws it all to hell and kisses him. It isn’t like he expects Dan to kiss back, it’s just the easiest way to explain something that felt impossible to-- well, explain.

Dan does pull back expectedly looking shocked, but he hasn’t completely pulled away from Nate’s orbit who’s a little intoxicated by that detail. “Nate... I’m pretty sure I’m not in Chuck’s book either.”

“Not quite.” Nate manages to get out, having to clear his throat a bit to even do so, nerves about to murder him. “Also, before you try and say it again, this isn’t about Serena.”

“I think I know you better than that.” Dan says softly, nodding. “And I know you well enough to know you’re too good at being a chameleon to your surroundings. I just didn’t know--,”

“This?” Nate offers. “Yeah, me either.”

Nodding, Dan pauses the conversation, eyes lowering with consideration. For a moment Nate thinks he might initiate another kiss but he doesn’t, instead asking quizzically, “Why me?”

“Because you’re the kind of man who would drop everything he wanted in life just to take care of a child you never expected.” Nate replies maybe too easily, gesturing around the messy apartment. “Because even the Upper East Side couldn’t change that when it really came down to it, you were a good person. You care about people and you prove it.”

“Nothing about my charming good looks?” Dan replies with a rather large smile and a casual shrug that Nate hadn’t quite realized he’d learned from him over the years.

Now Nate can’t help but laugh in return, only half hating the fact that he still hasn’t heard anything in response as long as they have this. “Come on, seriously--,”

“I guess we can try serious.” Dan says smoothly, and then they’re kissing again.

For once Nate isn’t afraid he’ll be considered just another pretty face to boss around.

#dan x nate #nate x dan #nate archibald #dan humphrey #danate #gossip girl #dan x nate fic #gossip girl fic #does it count as gg fic in 2021 if it's gay?#asking pls send help #all because of milo hours #i had to watch episodes for this lol #so yall better appreciate me and go comment on my fic

18 notes · View notes

extremelyblackandwhite · 4 years ago

Note

reader being best friends with carter while he's chasing serena but also being in love with him?

CARTER BAIZEN APPRECIATION SQUAD ASSEMBLE! (i promise i’ll get to non carter requests)

y/n and carter had known each other for a while

they had met during a summer at the hamptons when his parents invited her family over for dinner

she had helped him inside the house after returning from a particular night out which to his parents was a meeting with some of his friends to go over stuff for the new school year

from then onwards carter and y/n became friends

he would meet her in the back of her parents apartment and the two would drive around the nights of new york talking about their problems

it hadn’t taken long for y/n to fall in love with him

he was an attractive, smart man who seemed to have more goals other than the vapid boys she knew from st.judes

it wasn’t like she expected him to return her affections. she was his sister’s age, 3 years younger. she knew he wouldn’t be interested so she hid it deep inside her heart where no one would see it

after all she’d rather have a tiny bit of his heart than have to pretend he never existed

maybe she should’ve seen it coming that he would leave, but she didn’t and one afternoon as she knocked on his door to pick him up to go for their weekly lunch at his favourite spot was the moment she wished she could’ve avoided it

it was his mother who had opened the door, tight smile on her face, pity in her eyes as she stared at the girl in front of her “do you not know, sweetheart?” “am i supposed to know something?” “he left. says he doesn’t want anything to do with this family anymore”

her heart stopped for a while, the buzzing sound of her mind wondering why, why he wouldn’t tell her

it had been his sister caroline who had helped her through it, telling her he wasn’t even worth the hazzle, to instead focus on the much more attractive boys her age attending st.judes

y/n wasn’t interested but as time flew by she slowly learned to accept that he wasn’t returning

she had built a life for herself, becoming one of constance’s shining stars holding near perfect grades

she had also built a friendship with blair waldorf after serena had left her, both of them bonding over having someone leaving unexpectedly

“my mum was supposed to host a tea party for CeCe and she went to paris. usual” “do you need any help?” “wanna come? might make it less boring besides you still need a date for cotillion“ “well not everyone can have nate archibald for a date” “i am pretty lucky aren’t i? but you need a date, you cannot not have an escort. even serena is taking ... dan” “alright, i’ll go to the tea party” “perfect”

she should’ve not gone. she should’ve just accepted caroline’s invitation to go shop for a cotillion dress but she didn’t. she couldn’t see the future.

as she walked off the lift into the van der woodsen’s apartment, a familiar face showed, sat in a couch surrounded by girls

“y/n” blair rushed over to her side “i don’t want to frighten you but ... carter’s here” “i’ve seen.” “i want you to know that i didn’t invite him. cece invited him, she wants him to be serena’s escort.” “that’s fine” “are you sure? i could kick him out” “that’s fine”

it wasn’t fine.

she spent the whole tea party as further from him as possible, not sure of what to say to him or how to even react

although she had to admit it broke her heart that he wasn’t interested in even talking to her, instead looking her way and immediately turning to receive the praise of several girls

“he’s not even that attractive” blair rolled her eyes at her minions which were fauning over him “urgh, imagine being attracted to a wannabe matthew mcconaughey” “you don’t have to make me feel better, blair” “look at that last season suit. disgusting”

she stayed until the end of the party, chatting up with several people who came to ask about her family business and by the end of the party she had even started to help the maids bring dirty dishes into the kitchen

“you were always an odd one, i have to give you that” a voice made her drop the porcelain onto the soapy water and turn her face towards its direction. carter. “y/n, i’m really sorry” “yeah i could tell since you didn’t call or write after you left” “i didn’t have any way to contact you” “you didn’t even tell me you were leaving carter. do you know how it felt walking up to your house and having your mother tell me you left?” “i had to go y/n” “so have i, carter.”

she didn’t want to speak with him, she didn’t want to fall back into the state

at least she had decided not to speak with him until nate punched him at cotillion

“you look like shit” “thanks, y/n.” “i gotta say, i wanted to do that myself. nate stole that away from me” “how long are you gonna be upset with me, y/n?” “as long as i want” “c’mon, let’s do something together” “i said i would act civilised with you not lobotomised” “c’mon, y/n. i’ll pay” “do you even have any money? didn’t your parents cut you off?” “i’ll find a way” “... fine. the bar of the lotte new york palace

blair and caroline had told her not to go but she thought that it would be better to get it over and done with. to call it water under the bridge and not have him haunt her what ifs anymore

she found him at the bar of the palace, black suit on. he never used to wear suits, she still remembers him in his messy st. judes uniform, undone tie all the time

“you came” “i said i would” “i know you have every single reason to hate me but i miss you, y/n. i really do. i have so much to tell you” “some people would use a journal” “i fucked up, i know but ... second chance? you can punch me too if you want” “that’s a really good offer, i think i’m gonna pounder it” “how about i pick you up tomorrow night? late driving around new york” “you got yourself a deal, baizen”

soon enough she found herself in the same situation, still in love with him

he was still the same man, still the same chuckle, talking passionately about his projects, making stupid jokes

but one thing still was the same, the same thing she didn’t want to accept, he still would never reciprocate her feelings

“y/n, i can’t pick you up tonight. i have a date with serena.” “serena van der woodsen?” “yeah, do you mind?” “uh ... no... sure, go on”

her blood boiled out of jealousy

she always thought the reason he would never reciprocate her feelings was because she was younger but serena, serena was the same age as her and it stung, it stung so badly

she ended up at the house of the same person who could understand being jealous of serena : blair waldorf’s

“oh, please, y/n. seriously? carter? he’s so ... boring. god” “well i’m sorry blair not everyone can have their first time in the backseat of a limo with chuck bass” “hey now that nate is single maybe you should go out with him” “i’m not gonna go out with nate” “why you two would make such a nice couple” “i’m not in love with nate” “i’m sorry, y/n.”

she pretended it was okay

she would smile whenever he talked about serena

she would be next to him when she undoubtedly got him inside her petty little games with chuck

she would be there when he quit her and she would be there when he took her back

she was there for everything until one morning where she was woken up by someone banging on her door

“nate?” “something happened and you might want to sit down” “what happened? are you okay?” “serena left with carter last afternoon” “what do you mean?” “they left y/n, together.”

suddenly she found herself in the same spot she had been years ago abandoned

he returned later that summer during the races but this time she didn’t forgive him

she spent the day with dan and blair, mindlessly listening to serena talking about how carter followed her but she knew better

she knew they’d be back together and surely again they were

carter should feel happy, serena was back but he didn’t feel better

he felt ... empty, like something was lacking

whenever he laid down next to her and feel asleep he dreamed of y/n

he dreamed of her vintage oversized tees reaching her knees as she read her favourite books in his study

he dreamed of her laughter whenever he took her to a driver in theatre, fingers holding popcorns to her lips

he dreamed of her red tinted lips during festivities, dancing under streetlights singing showtunes, bitting her lips whenever she had a test

he convinced himself it was just missing her but part of him knew it wasn’t that

he should be with serena, her family approved, his family approved

so he stuck it out, convincing himself this was a phase just a phase

as serena dumped him on the side of the street he looked at the streetlight, remembering y/n in an oversized cardigan jumping puddles over it, twirling around it playfully

“what am i doing?”

he rushed down the streets of the upper east side like a mad man

he’d never walked this long

but he kept on walking, he kept on walking until he saw her apartment

he knocked on the door for what felt like a hundred times

“i’m coming” he could hear her sleepy voice from the other side and sure enough, soon enough the sound of her steps became too loud and she opened the door “carter, what are y...” “let me just say something okay? then you can shut the door” “it’s 1 AM” “please” “20 seconds” “i’m sorry, y/n. i’m so sorry, i should’ve told you when i left years ago, i shouldn’t have left with serena. i should’ve stayed with you. you always listened to me, you always believed in me and i always let you down. i miss you, i miss having fights with you about star wars plots, speaking with you on the phone at 5 AM, trying to make you laugh when you were upset. i miss seeing your sleepy smile every single morning, i miss you” “carter” “all this time being with her i just kept thinking about doing those things with you. taking you to cotillion, dance with you, be at your graduation and help you move into college, take you to fancy bars and restaurants, buy you flowers and everything else money can afford and i missed out on it, i missed out on it and i cannot give them to you. but here’s what i propose ... i wanna be there when you graduate from college, i wanna be there to help you move into your very first apartment, i want to be there when you start your first job, i wanna be there for you.” “you’re not one to stick around, carter” “let me try, please let me try” “isn’t this your third chance?” “i will ask you for a million chances as long as i get to see you for the rest of my life”

#carter baizen headcanons #carter baizen headcanon #sebastian stan

45 notes · View notes

deansmom · 4 years ago

Text

this is a draft from some time in s12 with background established deancas, tattooed!dean and mary getting to know dean. (ao3)

The first time Mary patches Dean up after a hunt, he tries not to squirm.

He’s sitting on the motel bed in Cas’ running shorts and nothing else because he’s got a huge gash across his chest and twenty minutes ago he had a knife sticking out of his shin. Vonnegut is staring up at him from his thigh.

Dean’s had worse. Hell, he’s stitched up worse on his own - but this time his mom was there.

Mary comes out of the bathroom and freezes in the doorway, blinking at him.

He offers her and awkward wave and winces at the movement.

It seems to snap Mary out of it because she shakes her head a little and walks over, “Sorry, I just...”

She makes a noise that Dean thinks is supposed to be a laugh.

“I didn’t know you had tattoos.”

Dean smiles a little bit to himself, amused, “You’ve seen the protection sigil.”

Mary rolls her eyes and sets the first aid kit on the bed next to him, “Yeah, I’ve seen the protection sigil but I didn’t know that you had Vonnegut on your thigh.”

Something in Dean’s chest clenches and melts all at once and the sudden rush of emotion knocks all the wind out of him.

He licks his lips and has to clear his throat to get any words to come out. His voice cracks, “You like Vonnegut?”

Mary laughs quietly as she pours the vodka from the trunk over the stab wound. Dean sucks in a breath and grips the mattress, biting his tongue to keep from yelping.

“He was one of my favorite authors,” she explains, dabbing the wound with some gauze. “Slaughterhouse-Five is one of the only books I read after graduating.”

Dean hisses, not sure what to say.

Mary finishes cleaning the wound up and out and sits back against the other bed while she gets the bandage, gauze and tape together.

“It’s... beautiful.”

Dean looks up, surprised and a little embarrassed. It’s nothing special. It’s old and faded now and it needs to be touched up soon. Some random kid the year he dropped out of high school threw a party and his older brother had a tattoo gun. Dean gave the kid his last twenty bucks and got a pretty solid, but still shit tattoo at sixteen.

John wanted to kill him.

He tells Mary as much as he leans back on the bed, “He didn’t see it until we were on a hunt when I was eighteen. I thought he was gonna hand me over to the vampires we were hunting.”

She doesn’t say much, just lets Dean talk and tell her about how angry John was and all the awful stuff he said to their son.

Mary can see some other tattoos peeking out from under Dean’s shorts and on his lower calf. They’re all older and faded, and she feels like she’s stumbled onto something she’s not supposed to see.

She finishes bandaging up his shin and pats the other knee gently, “Ok kiddo, you ready for me to clean up your chest?”

It takes her a moment to get off the floor, using Dean’s good knee as a brace to do so. He offers her a hand but she just waves him off, “I’m fine, you’re the one who looks like shit.”

Dean laughs, a genuine laugh, before moving to lay fully on the bed.

“Gee, thanks mom. That makes me feel better.”

Mary pokes his armpit as she sits next to him, reorganizing the first aid kit. She catches a glimpse of another tattoo near Dean’s armpit and spends half a second too long staring at it.

Dean shifts a little bit on the bed, “You’re gonna give a guy a complex.”

She shakes her head, laughing at herself, “Sorry, sorry, I just -”

Mary looks at him again, trying to broadcast acceptance with her expressions and body language.

“I’ve been around you for a while now Dean and I had no idea you had tattoos.”

She smiles tiredly and looks away quickly, grabbing the vodka again.

“Just seems like something a mom should know.”

The room goes quiet again while Mary works on cleaning Dean up. The tick tick ticking of the old clock in the kitchen fills the silence of the motel room.

In the room next to them the TV is blasting some infomercial. There’s a car in the parking lot that has their bass turned all the way up and if Dean closes his eyes, he can almost feel the bass.

Dean opens his mouth to say something, anything, and Cas opens up the motel door with dinner in hand.

He lets out a breath and smiles, some of the tension in the room and most of the tension in Dean’s body dissipates.

“Burgers? You’re awesome.”

Once the case is done and they make it back to the bunker, Dean finds Mary in the library. She’s flipping through one of the big tombs.

Sometimes Dean thinks it’s funny just how much of his mom he sees in Sam. If Mary had brown hair and was freakishly tall, they’d look identical in this moment.

The air switches on and the clank of the old metal startles Mary, making her look up at Dean. “Oh, hey.”

Dean offers her a small smile, “Hey.”

He’s nervous. He hasn't’ been able to stop thinking about what Mary said in the hotel room - things that a mom should know about her son.

It’s not a big deal, it really isn’t, but... it is. His tattoos are all small and objectively bad, but they’re little pieces of who he is. They represent all the different parts and important people of Dean’s life and they’re... personal.

“I, um,” he starts, rubbing the back of his neck. “I have a couple tattoos.”

If Mary’s surprised, she doesn’t show it. “Oh,” she says. “Ok.”

“The Vonnegut one, you saw...” Dean clears his throat and shifts on his feet, “And uh, I have dad’s dog tags - that’s what was by my armpit.”

He raises his arm just enough so that Mary can see the edge poking out of his sleeve. She lets out a small breath and gets out of the chair like she wants to walk over to Dean.

He interrupts her before she can say or do anything else, “And, uh, I have the opening chord progression from Hey Jude on the other thigh. Cause...” Dean shrugs kinda helplessly, “Y’know.”

Mary looks like she wants to cry.

Dean coughs, clearing his throat, “And, uh, Sam’s birth and death days on this side of my ribs.” He pauses for a beat, something occurring to him, “I should probably update that one.”

That startles a laugh out of Mary, “Yeah, probably.”

He hesitates for a moment, suddenly nervous to tell her what the other two are.

They’ve made a conscious decision to never hide their relationship, but they don’t go around parading it either. And for one terrifying moment, Dean wonders if his mom knows that he’s in love with his best friend who’s also an angel.

“Um,” Dean clears his throat, his voice going deeper all of a sudden. “And uh - this one.”

He pulls his jeans down just about an inch on his left hip to reveal a line of enochian in white ink. It’s the newest one Dean has even though it’s already a couple years old. It’s beautiful small, fragile line work with some red outlining to make certain letters pop.

Mary steps closer, about to lean down to look at it before realizing what she’s doing.

Dean laughs nervously and shrugs, “It’s fine.”

She smiles and gets close enough to just look at it, but not touch, “It’s beautiful.”

The compliment makes Dean’s heart swell a little bit, “Thanks. It’s my favorite one.”

Mary stands up fully, meeting his eyes with a kind smile, “What’s it say?”

The frankness of the question catches Dean off guard for a moment, but it shouldn’t. It also steals the wind out of him for a moment, because, well -

“It, uh,” Dean clears his throat, tucking his shirt back in. “It says beloved.”

Before Mary can say anything, Dean clears his throat again, trying to make himself sound normal and not like he’s freaking out. “And, uh, the last one is just... a C.”

It’s another white ink tattoo and it’s fading, always fading, but Dean loves it. It’s on the webbing of his ring finger.

The library is quiet for a moment, the only sound filling the room is Cas and Sam in the kitchen. The air kicks off, making Dean jump this time with the old metal settling.

“So,” Dean rubs the back of his neck, looking anywhere but at his mom. “Yeah. I just - I... y’know.”

Wanted you to know, he wants to say. Thought you might care, he thinks.

Mary smiles and sets a hand on Dean’s forearm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Thank you for telling me.”

Dean looks up again, meeting her eyes and smiles nervously, “S’no big deal.”

She opens her mouth to say something else, but is interrupted.

“Dean!” Castiel pokes his head in the doorway, smiling at them, “Hello, Mary. Dinner is ready if you’re hungry.”

Mary can’t help but notice the way all the tension leaves Dean’s body again, but she doesn’t dare say anything about it.

It’s not her place. It’s no more her place than if they were two strangers at a gas station.

“Thanks, Cas,” Dean offers, a small private smile on his face. “We’ll be in there in a minute.”

Castiel nods and leaves without preamble.

Mary still doesn’t know what to make of him.

Dean clears his throat, the deeply awkward feeling settling in around them, “I, uh… I know that you’re, y’know.”

He cringes before he can stop himself, “Not entirely comfortable. But I just…” Dean harrumphs, his arms coming up to wrap around himself, “I don’t know. You’re… my mom.”

Even if he’s not her Dean, which he understands, he still wants her to know him.

And he thinks she wants that too. To know them as men, as people… to just be a friend.

Mary just squeezes his elbow gently, too scared to say something that will fuck up the moment.

Dean gets it.

“Come on.” He offers her a smile, his head inclined towards the kitchen, “Let’s get some food.”

#spndeancas #dean and mary #destiel text #deancas fic #mackenzie attempts fics #personal #otp: cursed or not

18 notes · View notes

spilledreality · 3 years ago

Text

Highlights from Jacob Clifton's Gossip Girl recaps, S1 pt1

On this show, we fall on our knees before biography every time

If Jenny came there looking to use B for a tool, then that means she’s in the game. And if she’s in the game, then that means she is a tool in turn. If Blair’s going to start a War, she needs soldiers, and here is one offering itself on a platter, with no allegiances and a hunger so deep she’d give herself up to Bass again… Jenny is maybe too young to understand the terms, but hungry enough to make a deal. “An Eleanor Waldorf original is the uniform of B’s private army. But will J be a loyal soldier, or side with S’s rebel forces?”

I stumped for this assignment hardcore all summer because I love this, I love it when you talk in war metaphors with teenage girls, because... teenage girls invented war. My friend Karen has a t-shirt that says “I Survived Eighth Grade.”

"You know, be honest with where you're both at. Just do that, okay?" I'm not saying it's bad advice, but I think better advice at this point in the game would be to walk before you run, because as any Upper East Sider can tell you, you have to be honest with yourself before you can be honest with anybody else—which hardly anybody on this show has accomplished anyway—or else you're just using them as a sounding board for your own propaganda, which is all Dan and Serena ever do to each other anyway. Mainly about what good people they are.

Dan promises not to tell anybody about Eric, which this whole episode, everybody keeps doing, and meanwhile Serena spends the whole time saying Eric shouldn’t be a secret, but then she ends up stepping in and ruining herself to... keep him a secret. Gossip right there in the title, folks: Disclosure and surveillance, secrets and lies, are just two sides of the very radioactive relationship you have and must mediate between yourself and the world outside. If you’re not writing your story, somebody else is going to. And if you are the one writing it, guess what? Same result.

Asher tugs softly on the boy's St. Jude's school tie, in the age-old manner. (We've all done that, every one of us, because it works on everybody: adjust the tie, adjust the collar. It's subservient at the same time it's controlling; it's intimate but out of their line of sight. Their eyes can't see what your hands are doing, which is touching them, and reminding them that you can see them. How many times in a day does somebody touch your throat? If wolves had neckties, they would do that shit to each other constantly.) The boy stands, smaller, on the other side of him, but you can see rigidity in his pose. You can see him not giving in. And when Asher looks around, furtively, afraid, in love, and surveys the street, and kisses him, you can see the boy give in again. Just like he knew he would.

Blair's afraid, confused; Serena's eyes track her like a snake. "I wasn't feeling well..." Serena make a barely sympathetic moue and hmms at her for a moment, lovingly, and then takes the scarf from around her head, and ties it around Blair's neck. (How many times in a day does somebody touch your throat?) "You poor thing," she says, musically; Blair starts to panic. She stammers out that she needs to get her missed assignments, and Serena strokes her hair. Just like Georgina did, once upon a time. She promised it would feel so good, to let it burn. She was right. Blair walks away, touching her hair where Serena singed it; the scarf around her neck, like a collar. Chuck appears, grinning. "Well well well. Look who's back on top. I wonder how that happened!?" Serena goes among the people, admiring their necklaces, adjusting their hair, giving her favor and taking it away again. The sun lights her up; she is on fire.

Serena: “I for real thought you were running late. Those were just test shots just now. I... encouraged you to do this. Why would I try to steal something that I pushed you to do?”

Blair: “Because, again, that is how you roll.”

This is everything; this is the show, what it is about. Even what Dan is about, in a way. Blair instinctively knows, correctly, that she deserves to be loved, which makes it so confusing that Serena’s “it” makes everybody give her stuff instead. We came into this at a weird time, but it’s their whole relationship: trying to hold onto each other in the constant onslaught of this narrative unfairness. A friend emailed me, before this episode, like, “Why do you care about this show so much? Why do you care if Serena and Blair work it out?” And this was exactly why: Because Serena will always get the thing, and Blair will always lose the thing, and they will try to love each other anyway, and it’s riveting. Blair is going to want a thing this week, I promise, and whatever it is, she will almost get it, and then Serena will get it, and they will both want to die as a result. And if you’ve never been on one side of that relationship at one time, and on the other side of that relationship at another time, what have you been doing instead of having friends, because you always feel one way or the other, and you have to recognize how gross it makes you feel to be on either side of that, because it’s nobody’s fault, it’s just how it happens. There’s a totem pole, and you’re on it, and there’s always somebody above you and somebody underneath you, and you have to be kind to them both or else you’re in an uncomfortable position, and learning this is how we get ourselves under control.

Dan's response [to getting dumped] is confused sadness, in combination with the easygoing acceptance that could have led to greater heights of pleasure than he might have imagined if he didn't suck so greatly. It's more interesting than that, though, because in all three stories tonight you have a rug-pull about the relationship: you thought it was like this, but it's like that. You thought I liked you, trusted you, loved you, you thought we were on a team together forever, you thought I enjoyed your company, you thought nothing would come between us... The most painful thing about a breakup, or a momentary shame, or the embarrassment of getting played, or finding out the game behind the game, is feeling like an asshole. You were going along like everything was fine, and they knew it wasn't fine. They lived in the real world, and you didn't.

When people scream and yell about getting played, or cheated on, it's not pride. Nothing like that. It's pain, and it's fear: the world wrenching itself around you, from one position to another, like finding out the floor is the ceiling and always has been; that sickening coyote drop in your stomach just before you go into free-fall. The world changes around you, its angles and symmetry force themselves into new and unfamiliar shapes, and it's terrifying and sickening; deception is betrayal less on the emotional level than an ontological one.

#jacob clifton #gossip girl

4 notes · View notes

abunchofcrazyweirdos · 5 years ago

Text

OOC:

If youre checking out my muses page: PLEASE Ignore my blank muses. I am redoing everything and it’s in the works. Here are my muses in case you’re wondering and would like to know who they are. I do have another page of muses that is perfectly alright. If you’re wondering who they’re FCs are I will let you know too.

Noah Puckerman: (S1-6 or college).

Jake Puckerman: Womanizer of McKinley High School. Dancer/Singer.

Mason McCarthy: Twin brother to his sister Madison. He wishes that she would let him live his own life. He’s a cheerleader and singer.

Kitty Wilde: Head Bitch in Charge, her role model is Quinn Fabray. In Glee and a cheerleader.

Derek Hough: Lives to have fun and dance. Professional dancer on Dancing with the Stars. Passionate, Dedicated, and joker.

Kevin Matheson: Video game programmer, nerd, diligent, resourceful and sensible.

Brian Kinney: CEO of Kinnetik and owner of Babylon night club. Self-made millionaire. He will often put his foot in his mouth, and say things without thinking

Riley Matthews: Ball of energy. Outgoing and Bubbly. Loves her family and friends. Will try something new even if she fails.

Lucas Friar: Moved from Texas to New York. Champion bull rider, compassionate, intelligent, noble, athletic and a gentleman.

College FC for Lucas

Farkle Minkus: Boy genius. Nerd. Loves school. The teachers pet and he rather be studying than out partying with friends.

Ashton Irwin: Drummer for 5SOS. Aussie Native. Singer. Punk rocker, passionate.

Calum Hood: Bass player for 5SOS. Singer, Adventurous, Aussie

Luke Hemmings: Lead Singer, Guitar player for 5SOS. Dedicated and Aussie.

Michael Clifford: Vocals and Guitar player for 5SOS. Aussie, Punk rocker, joker, shy at times.

Harry Styles: . ¼ of One Direction. Singer plays piano and guitar. Cheeky, lovable, Baby Tarzan and curly.

Louis Tomlinson: Joker. ¼ of One Direction. Singer. Guitar player and Piano.

Liam Payne: ¼ of One Direction. Beatboxer, Singer, Batman (secretly) and Daddy Directioner. Lovable.Adorable, Puppy.

Niall Horan: Food lover. ¼ of One Direction. Drums, Singer, Guitar, Piano.

Zayn Malik: A former member of One Direction. The rapper, Singer, Doing my own thing, the tattoo artist.

Alec Lightwood: Shadowhunter, reserved, logical, charming, imaginative. Don’t mess with him. Overly protective of his sister and loved ones.

Billy Nutter: Punk, protective, impulsive, devoted, uncertain and sassy.

Nikko or Hunter Clarington: Singer, bad boy, adventurous, passionate and lives life to the fullest.

Oliver Queen: Athletic. The Green Arrow. Independent, Strong, hard-headed, stubborn and will do anything to save his family and friends.

Ethan Snow: Hard headed, bad boy with a soft side. Once his mind his made up, that’s it. He won’t budge.

Trinity White: Sweet, lovable, warm, singer and a bookworm. Can be hardheaded at times.

Evie: She will always be in the library, or with a book in her hand. She is very driven and passionate. Very intelligent.

Felicity Smoak: Team Arrow. Graduate of MIT and a hacker.

Caitlin Snow: Bio-engineer for S.T.A.R. Labs. Easily hurt so she guards herself and her heart. Killer Frost

Steve Rogers or AKA Captain America. Kicking ass and taking names. Loves to have a good time and joke around.

Clint Barton or AKA Hawkeye. Sneaks up on you if you’re not careful. Will kick your ass if you get on his bad side.

Cisco Ramon: Mechanical Engineer at S.T.A.R Labs. Intelligent, joker, laid back and Vibe.

Clary Fray: Promising art student, intelligent, guarded. Shadowhunter

Cole Pendery: Member of IM5. Dorky, a child at heart and very lovable. Cuddly panda.

Jackson Whitmore: Cocky, competitive, has a lovable side to him. On the lacrosse and swim team. (Verse: Roy from Arrow as well)

Lindy Sampson: Born in Chicago now lives in New York City. Works at NYPD in the Cyber Crimes Division. Hacker, MIT Drop out. Quick to take the blame.

Tommy Calligan: NYPD Detective with the Cyber Crimes Division. New York City born and raised. Witty, Smart and tough.

Jake Bolin: Aussie born and raised but moved to New York for job. Lawyer. Has a temper and will snap easily.

Gabe Morales: Member of IM5. Bad Boy but lovable too. Cocky.

Iris West: Daughter to Joe West. Journalist, Graduate Student. Witty, Passionate, easily will defend friends and family. Brother: Wally West.

Jace Wayland: Determined, narcissistic, expert Shadowhunter.

Connor Walsh: Law Student. Sly, Sexy, Smart, Narcissistic

Veronica Mars: Private Eye. Will accept any job that is offered to her. Dedicated to her work, family, friends and partners.

Oliver Hampton: Computer Nerd and hacker. Falls in love easily. Has to learn how to guard his heart.

Logan Echolls: Known as the resident bad boy of Neptune. Does not apply himself, smart, sarcastic attitude,tough exterior but troubled inside.

Grace: Gentle. Kind. Positive outlook on life. Surfer. Sweet.

Mack: Leader. Smart. Confident. Determined. Surfer. Singer.

Aiden: Passionate. Driven. A leader. Smart. Hardheaded

Simon: Intelligent. Finds humor in any situation. Loyal. Vampire or Human

Izzy Lightwood: Kick ass. Comfortable in her body. Keeps people in check. Breaks rules, will speak her mind.

Image result for raphael shadowhunters

Raphael: Well-dressed. Handsome. Protective.

Image result for lydia shadowhunters

Lydia: Driven. Bad ass. Vulnerable. Harsh.

Image result for Magnus Bane

Magnus Bane: High Warlock. Glitter. Perfection.

Jason: Mechanic (Motorcycles)

Josh: Tattoo Artist.

Neal: Informant for FBI.

Image result for Jess Mariano

Jess Mariano: Writer. Smart. Witty. Hot-headed/Temper

Image result for Logan Huntzberger

Logan Huntzberger: Smart. Charming. Flirty.

Image result for machine gun kelly

Ty: Your typical bad boy.

Image result for tyler young

Tyler: Closeted gay. Foster child. Dad is MIA and Mom is sick.

Image result for brent antonello

Jude Kinkade: Vice President of Devils Basketball team

Zero or Gideon: Member of the Devils Basketball team.

Noel Kahn: Your typical charming guy with a bad side. Throws wild parties.

Wyatt Casey: Outsider. Likes to keep to himself mostly.

Diego: FBI Agent.

Barry Allen or Sebastian Smythe: Singer, Forensic scientist and Student

Danny: Hockey Player.

Mickey

Ian

Chelsea

Ben

Deran

Andrew

Jughead.

Jay

Thomas

Stiles

Ethan

Derek

Theo

Liam Dunbar

Corey

Mason

Pol. Student.

Buck: Firefighter.

Ricky

Carlos

Aria

Marley Or Kara

Chris

Moose:

Cami:

Sean or Eddie:

Andie:

Blaine Anderson:

2 notes · View notes

perfectirishgifts · 4 years ago

Text

John Rzeznik Of Goo Goo Dolls On New Christmas Album And Premiere Of Augmented Reality Holiday Movie Musical

New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/john-rzeznik-of-goo-goo-dolls-on-new-christmas-album-and-premiere-of-augmented-reality-holiday-movie-musical/

John Rzeznik Of Goo Goo Dolls On New Christmas Album And Premiere Of Augmented Reality Holiday Movie Musical

The first Goo Goo Dolls Christmas album, ‘It’s Christmas All Over,’ is now available via Warner … [] Records

Since forming in 1986, and breaking through to the mainstream nine years later with the album A Boy Named Goo, Buffalo, New York alt pop outfit Goo Goo Dolls have tackled everything from live albums and vinyl reissues to greatest hits sets and more.

But for the first time in their nearly 35 years, 2020 marks the group’s foray into the world of Christmas music.

In a tumultuous year defined by quarantine amidst pandemic, the Christmas spirit may seem fleeting for some.

But the group’s latest album, It’s Christmas All Over, looks back for inspiration, conjuring up the Christmas classics of yore not only in terms of canon cuts revisited but aesthetically too, in everything from the album cover art to the stunning visuals that drive the augmented reality film which accompanies the new seasonal release.

“It was always the best time of year. It was always the time of year where my family would call a ceasefire with each other. We’d have relatives over. There was always a ton of gifts and good food. It was just amazing,” said Goo Goo Dolls singer and guitarist John Rzeznik, recalling what the Christmas holiday means to him. “I went back to the real old stuff – and some very obscure stuff. Louis Prima and Spike Jones and stuff like that. Trying to get some inspiration from stuff like that was a lot of fun.”

With their touring schedule wiped out by the onset of COVID-19, the Christmas album, now available via Warner Records with exclusive holiday-themed merch, quickly became a priority for co-founding Goo Goo Dolls Rzeznik and bassist Robby Takac.

Rzeznik co-produced the record with touring band members Jim McGorman and Brad Fernquist, who helped facilitate elaborate arrangements featuring a horn section and more, capturing the essence of the seasonal standards.

“We were in L.A. and it was kind of like this post-apocalyptic Los Angeles. It felt like there was no one in town but us,” said Rzeznik of recording sessions which took place during the early days of shelter-in-place orders. “We were in this really old recording studio – very hip, very cool. You walked in the door and it felt like it was 1968, you know? And it was just fun,” he continued, noting the impact of L.A. studio Palomino Sound and his continued exploration of recording techniques from a bygone era.

“It was such a learning process. I was putting my two cents in – but I don’t have a musical education. So I relied on two of the guys in my band: Jim McGorman, the keyboard player, and Brad Fernquist, who plays guitar – because they have these very, very deep musical educations. So they were able to take the ideas and run with them and we could work together,” said the singer. “It was challenging at times. But I have a really tight musical relationship with those two guys. So they understand, when I’m like humming something, what I’m looking for.”

Top notch session musicians contribute to the album, offering each of the album’s ten tracks an old school feel. Jon Button, of The Who, chips in with upright bass, while The Union Square 5 lend a jazz feel to the closing instrumental affair “The Christmas Party.” McGorman adds keyboard and mellotron while Fernquist adds additional guitar.

In addition to the group’s take on exemplary holiday cuts like “Let it Snow” and “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” It’s Christmas All Over also features a pair of original tracks. “It gets harder each year to believe in what’s real, I need Christmas,” sings Rzeznik in the new “This is Christmas.”

“Do as much as you can to help as many people as you can. That’s what that means,” he said of the new lyric. “And I really believe that if you put that challenge out to people, that they’ll accept it and they’ll rise to the occasion. I truly believe in that spirit – maybe not so much of Christmas, but of human beings. That if you ask them to help, they will. And they’ll do it gladly,” he continued. “The other original song on the album is ‘You Ain’t Getting Nothin’.’ That song is about a kid – who’s basically me – who winds up on Santa’s naughty list. We had a really interesting guy from Chile, Juan Urbina, animate a video for that song. And it’s very Chuck Jonesy – an homage to his animation and his slapstick style. It’s really awesome.”

Accompanying the new album is the augmented reality film It’s Christmas All Over, a musical movie set to premiere at 7PM ET on Saturday, December 12, 2020 via FanTracks.

Produced and directed by FanTracks president Barry Summers, the film take’s the album’s vintage tone even further through band interaction in settings like a 1940s speakeasy and even the iconic set of The Ed Sullivan Show.

Auctioning a signed guitar to benefit St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital’s “Music Gives to St. Jude Kids” program, Rzeznik is clear on what the holiday season should mean despite the obvious limitations brought on by COVID-19.

“More than ever, even though we physically can’t touch each other, there are so many deep ways that we can become better as a society,” Rzeznik said. “Being of service, especially in these times – raising money, collecting food – especially protein. Things like that. You’ve got to help your neighbors,” he continued. “Get out of your isolation and help. Socially distance and be safe – but contribute. Being of service completely cures isolation. And you can save your own life by helping someone else with theirs.”