#{{ v;; post season 5 au }} i found peace in my family

[motherbuilt-blog]

Drabble for @ragingicarus 

She is older than her goodbye video and it shows in the way she looks. Hair is going grey and wrinkles starting to form showing it had been a while since their last talk. She has been in Monty’s updates and a few videos. This was the first video she’d made for Murphy since that goodbye though. 

“Hey there stranger I bet you thought that the last video was all you got but you’re special enough I figured you deserve a sequel.” She lets out a laugh at her comment though tears start to fall as she laughs. 

“I thought that video was all I was gonna give you but a few days ago I had a seizure. A few things had been happening leading up to it symptoms and shit. It’s all stuff that happened to my grandmother when she had a brain tumor. I know brain tumor big scary words but I’m okay it’s not pain it’s other stuff like my vision getting blurry or memory loss. “ She tries to explain though she stops letting out a bit of a laugh. 

“Sorry I’m rambling it’s just all scary to say. I’m not afraid of dying I miss Roma, Mbege, Peter, and all the others so much I’m ready to be with them. I’m just scared of forgetting our memories of what I wanted to say. Thinking about the things I’d lose from my mind made me realize I had things I wanted to get off my chest before I forgot it all.”

She pauses for a moment and wipes away a few tears. “I really hope you’re alone I should have said that sooner sorry. I just I need to tell you things and I don’t want my daughter or any of our space family here for it. I just want it to be the two of us I would have done it face to face but I don’t think I have it in me to do this face to face.”

She pauses again and takes in a breath. “I told you I love you and I do but I was also in love with you. I think a part of me always was even as little kids who teased and stole each others toys. I didn’t realize it for a long time not until we kissed up on the ring. Kissing you I realized I had spent a lifetime in love with you. Part of me wishes I had told you but I am happy that I didn’t tell you now that I think back to it. It didn’t feel fair to Mbege who I loved them and still love now. It didn’t feel fair to Emori even if you weren’t together at the time. She is my family my beautiful sister that I love so much.”

Lou turns her head for a moment and wipes away a few tears. It’s not as bad as she thought it would be but she has been crying though most of it. “Sometimes I like to think in some other universe in another life we had our chance. We had our little life together and our happy ending it just wasn’t this one.In this life I got my beautiful girl and of course Mbege who I am ready to see I miss him so much. You- god you have Emori she’s perfect I love her so much she’s so pretty and smart she’s so perfect for you. I hope you two live beautiful lives together and that a long long time from now you can tell me how beautiful your lives were when we meet agai

“I know that tree of eden shit was never your thing but I do believe it. I believe we will meet again and be so happy all of us. Just don’t let that be before you’ve lived a long life okay? I miss you but I don’t want you ruining your chance with this new planet and your girl because you deserve a long peaceful life like i’ve had.” 

“I’m sorry that I laid all this out on you I mean I’ve had what forty years to process it all but you didn’t even know. I just had to tell you all of it before I forget it all. It feels good to say it out loud I feel a weight lifted off my chest I feel... ready in a way. Take care of our family and my beautiful girl keep them safe- live a happy life.” 

A genuine smile forms on her lips and tears stop falling. “I love you so much John Murphy and I can’t wait to see you one day. I know this is the part where I’m supposed to say may we meet again but I know we will so I’ll say something else.” She pauses for a moment and suddenly she thinks of Jasper and a grin forms on her lips. “I’ll see you on the other side, Murph.” She tells him before the video ends screen black. It’s her final video message to John Murphy.

[motherbuilt-blog]

Delia has been doing this bit by bit just get a few people out of cryo sleep to welcome them to their new world. Opening the next pod she looks to the name. “Maia Farrin- I’d suggest getting up slowly so you don’t hurt yourself. Welcome to the future.”

@stellarstolen // delia starter