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gaetoeinhaler · 4 years ago

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deadass wish diavolo was real tbh. snack looking mofo.

n e wayz, enjoy.

basically, this is just a oneshot of how i feel most of the time. its correlated to the reader's birthday, which is your birthday and i will NOT make one up for the reader since that would be unfair as hell. but this is what i would like to happen for when my birthday comes around pwq but it wont tbh

people forget my birthday a lot and its mainly because i was born on November 1st which is after Halloween. :,))) the only people who do remember my birthday is my mom TvT but its not like i forget other people's birthdays >:0

i've always remembered my family's birthdays, my friend's, and i had to remind them that it was my birthday until i gave up and said fuck it.

𝐚 𝐛𝐢��𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫

diavolo x female reader fluff

words : 1.3k+

_____________

it was like always. i shouldn't have gotten my hopes up so high. just like in the human world, it happened here. people forgot my birthday. and to make it worse, the brothers forgot it. they can remember everything else, but they can't remember something like this. they never once said happy birthday, not one of them. it hurt, knowing that those who i was close to here didn't even care to remember. though, its best not to tell them. then they'd be apologizing constantly and do things they wouldn't.

heading towards the exit to RAD, i could hear someone calling out my name. a voice i know way too well. turning around, i could see diavolo, waving his hand around to get my attention, coming towards me with barbatos, who looked dead inside as always, following after him. "(y/n)! i'm glad i found you!" the red-head said as he smiled. "happy birthday!" he cheered, barbatos smiling and saying a happy birthday to me as well.

staring at them with wide eyes, i watched as diavolo's expression changed. "what's wrong? is today not your birthday?" he asked. i shook my head and smiled, giggling softly. "no no, it's today. its just i didnt think anyone would remember."

he shook his head. "nonsense! i remembered! didn't lucifer and his brothers remember as well?" he asked, tilting his head to the side a bit. "no, they didn't. though its no big deal, honestly."

he mumbled something about lucifer and his brothers under his breathe before grabbing my hand. "nonsense! it is a big deal! i'll make sure you have the most wonderful birthday then!" his childish aura came back, barbatos looking more dead inside now. i feel bad for him sometimes, but then again, that's the job he agreed to having. well, i'm not exactly sure if he agreed.

____________

with diavolo and i sitting at a table, he was talking about his day. so far, it mainly consisted of his shenanigans with lucifer, not that i minded though. it was interesting to hear how much lucifer suffers with diavolo by him all the time. giggling at one of the stories, barbatos soon walked in carrying a small cake. he set it down gently and stuck in a few candles.

"happy birthday." he smiled as he lit them. diavolo thanked the overworked soul before turning to me. "happy birthday, (y/n)!" he moved the cake closer to me. staring at the sweet in front of me, i gently blew out the candles before barbatos started to cut it. he couldve cut it from the beginning, but i didn't mind. them remembering my birthday was good enough.

____________

frosting on my nose, a red blush upon my cheeks, i stared at the camera with wide eyes as diavolo snapped a photo of the scene in front of him. "i'll be sending that to lulu," he giggled like a highschool girl and most definitely posted it on his devilgram. seconds later, i got a notification on my d.d.d. saying "happy bday (y/n) 😝" with the photo of me in it.

moving my eyes from my d.d.d. and towards the demon king, i stared at him with disbelief. he had a mischievous look upon his face, he muttered out a few words.

"now everyone in devildom will know its your birthday."

____________

"HEKSDSNS liPSTIcK iN mY ValEnTinO wHitE bAg"

"hi welcome to chilis."

"mOthEr tRuckEr DooD! that HuRt like a bUttChEek on a stick!"

with vines playing in the background, and as messed up as it sounds, diavolo and i were cuddled up together in his room. with his arms wrapped around my torso, keeping him close to me, he hummed in delight as he watched the vine compilations. he was most likely confused as to what they were really doing, and why they were doing it, but he still watched and enjoyed.

"ahahahHaha wHy yOu mAd? CuZ mY puSsY pOpS moRe SevEreLy, anD yOurS doNT haH!"

"hey, (y/n)." diavolo whispered, turning his head away from the screen and towards me. i looked up at him, confused. "yeah? what is it?"

"i want to be honest with you." he sighed, removing his arms from around me. he sat up, and looked away. as if afraid to say what he wanted to. "i want to tell you that, i want to become more then friends. not best friends, but as in a dating scenario."

i sat up and hugged him tightly, nesting my face into his chest. "glad to know, i feel the same." i stared up at him with a small smile. it was true. maybe or maybe not i had fallen for the child like demon prince who could kill me whenever he wants. okay, yeah i did fall for him. he was too much of a snack, and damn he dummy thicc doe.

and before i knew it, our cuddling session turned into a full make out session. him looming over me, the vines still playing in the background. lips moved against mine, tongues brushing against each other. his hands pinning my wrists above me, pulling his head away as he panted and stared down at me. we both knew where this was going to go, and we were willing to take it to that level so soon.

"what's worse than a rapist?"

"boom!"

"a ChiLD!"

____________

sitting at the table, lucifer wondered where (y/n) was. she hadn't come home from RAD and hadn't seen her there either when he went to check. anger was fuming inside of him. the least she could do was answer his texts and calls.

it wasn't until a notification popped up on his d.d.d. that caught his attention. a new post from diavolo's devilgram account. opening up the app, he stared at the picture that was taken.

"happy bday (y/n) 😝"

he sighed and set his d.d.d. back in his pocket. he forgot that today was her birthday, and to make it worse, diavolo's use of words and the emoji after it didn't help him. he needed to confront diavolo about emojis and their uses before he makes himself more of a cringe then he already is.

asmodeus, on the other hand, grumbled to himself. his brothers, who had no clue at what was going on, looked towards the fourth eldest. "what's wrong, asmo?" beel asked, chewing on his food. "today was (y/n)'s birthday and i FORGOT! ugh! and now she's spending time with lord diavolo!" he squirmed around in his seat "does she even KNOW how many times ive tried to get laid by him? ugh! and now she has a free ticket!"

the rest weren't surprised about asmo wanting to get a taste of thiccavolo. but when he mentioned it being (y/n)'s birthday, guilt rushed over their past emotions.

"it's (y/n)'s birthday?"

#obey me #obey me diavolo #obey me diavolo x reader #obey me diavolo x female reader #diavolo #diavolo x reader #diavolo x female reader #x reader #x female reader #reader insert #female reader insert #fluff

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dgennk · 4 years ago

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Undertale: Saving Dreemurrs - Halloween

NOTICE: [I just wanted to write something and post it, to get back into writing. I’m working on an AU for Undertale, cause that’s captured my heart since January, and I just wanted to get my toe wet on something silly. Why Halloween? Cause I had some white Reese’s when I was thinking this up. Maybe I’ll rewrite it for Halloween this year? Anyway, thank you for reading, any constructive criticism would be helpful.] Friday October 31st, Halloween.

Within the Underground, this date held no special worth, just another day to live for the next. On the surface however, this date marked a special occasion. As the sun would set, children and adults alike would leave their homes, adorned in costumes for one goal.

Sugar rush inducing, cavity spawning, sweet candy.

Sour, bitter, tooth-rotting sweet. Candies and confections were prepared and bought for costumed humans of the night.

Today this tradition held strong, especially with the inclusion of monsters that once called the Underground their home.

This could be merrily seen within the Dreemurr abode, as its children returned from hours of trick-or-treating. Four children scrambled into HOME with pillow cases filled to bursting with sugary delights.

“Your outerwear, children!” their trailing guardian, Toriel, reminds as she shuts the door behind her.

“Yes mom!” “Got it!” and “Yes, Ms. Toriel!” choired the children, closely followed with the shuffle of clothing. Scarves and jackets, tossed at the basket beside the second entryway, the act hardly slowed their rush.

With a skip into the foyer, Frisk kicks off his final boot and breaks for the right hall. “Last in trades free!”

“Huh?” Asriel gasps while MK lets out an indignant ‘Dood!’ Only for them to be left behind by the other human child.

Chara cackles, their foam forked tail wiping as they turned the corner.

The two boys scramble to give chase, neither willing to part with their treasured trove.

Toriel hummed as she hung her snaily shawl a step from the door. A light thud had her eyes flutter but the bleat that proceeded drew a knowing smile. “Perhaps,” she muses, “I should unveil it a tad earlier.” Her smile grew.

“That wasn’t fair,” mumbled Asriel, sitting at the center circle mat, sack of candy buried in his lap. He rubbed his snout, slightly bruised from his fumble.

“Come on dude, don’t be sore,” Mk laughed beside him, his candy sack untied from his chest. “Your mom’s dress was just too long!”

“I needed it for my costume!” proclaimed the prince fervently. He threw his arms around his bag and dug his face deep. It worked in tandem with his wide-brim green hat to obscure his downcast look. “And, it’s a robe, not a dress.”

“But like,” MK began, a brow risen with a perplexed twist of the snout. “Could have made it shorter.”

“That,” chimed Chara with a playful smile, reclined on the far right bed. “Wouldn’t be authentic.”

A groan escaped the hidden boss monster. “Chara, please stop teasing.”

The jester’s smile grew. “Okay, Az.” Bells jingled with their chuckle.

Frisk tapped his painted chin in thought, face turned up for the starry-blue ceiling. He hummed and nodded then headed for the down prince. “I change my mind,” he leans down, while reaching a blue hand into his right pocket.

“Hm? Frisk?” The prince peered up.

“Here,” The child placed a treat on Asriel’s bag. A blackish ball, about the size of a doughnut hole, with ovid sprinkles topped on its shell. It was inside a clear twist wrapper, no labels to be seen.

“Where did we get those?” Chara mumbled aloud, with a lean to peer over.

A small smile came over Asriel’s mostly shaded visage as he accepted the gift. “Thanks Frisk.” He opened the wrapping, it was hard and didn’t smell much like anything. He still appreciated it all the same. He slipped it between his teeth and took a small crunch to it.

His reaction was a bit of a surprise to the others watching.

Chara paused to stare, wide-eyed. Their brother had taken to the candy well. No, that was an understatement. The boss monster moaned in delight, holding his cheeks as whatever piece of confectionery in his mouth seemed to overload his senses. She couldn’t help but twist her head at Frisk, only to stare, numb from his expression. His eyes gleamed scarlet in the shadow of his hair, a telling smile etched onto his face. “... Frisk?”

“Azz, dood,” MK calls, “WHAT is that?”

The boss monster only groaned before turning his head with a bob. “Oh,” he muttered lightly, his voice muffled somewhat. “It's greht, like moh’s pie, but,” he pauses to savor the taste on his tongue. “It's tahfy!”

“Eh?”

“Hey Asriel!” the rubber-clad Dreemurr smiled wider. “You can have more if you want!!”

“Critical hit!” Chara grunted.

“You ghot more?!” Asriel bursts to his feet, his own candy forgotten to the floor.

Hook. The thin smile on Frisk’s face had blossomed into a face-splitting grin. “Yeah, a dozen if you wanna trade!”

“Oh,” pauses Asriel, “Righht! Uhm… Do you have sohmethhing in mihnd?”

Line! “Well…” he draws it out before clicking his teeth. “How many of those big Reese's do you have?!”

DEVIL! Chara screams internally.

“Oh, those,” Asriel smiles brightly. “Papyrus and Undyne were giving out the really big stuff, they gave me 5. I think they were… jumbo?” he trailed, unsure and flustered. He hadn’t really read the packages at the time. He perked quick though, beaming. “You can have them! If you want?”

“Yes! Yeah!!” Frisk chirps while pulling a white bag from his candy sack. With palpable eagerness he presents it forward to the prince, only for both to stumble. A blur swooped between and snatched it, leaving the two at a loss!

Chara’s glower twinkled, standing high on the bed parallel to the other. “You sneak!” she accuses. “No one gave us these on our route! Where did you get them?”

Frisk’s brows pulled down with his angry expression. “You can’t take my trade candy! Give it back!”

“You had these since the start, didn’t you!?” Chara ignored Frisk’s demand and instead placed the bag behind their back, their other hand pointed at the miffed blue munchkin.

“N-No I didn’t!” protested Frisk.

“You’re a bad liar!” She giggled angrily in retort.

“Come on guys!” MK yawned at them. “Let’s just start eating candy already!”

Frisk whips his hand out to point at Chara, squinted eyes burning red hot, “Not until Chara lets me get my Jumbo Recess!”

“Your Jumbo Recess?!” Chara repeated with a haughty laugh. “You knew I was going to trade for them! I always trade with Asriel!”

Now the youngest Dreemur pulls back, arms crossed over their chestplate. “I didn’t forget! I got something for you too!” he ends in a huff.

“Wait, what?” blinked Chara.

“I was gonna trade for your Rice Krispie Treats with this!” he finds and reaches into his candy-sack. After a shuffle he takes a deeper reach inside and withdraws an oval shaped treat, just a few inches shorter than his face, covered in a clear wrinkled wrapping.

Chara was speechless, arms falling slack.

“Where did you get that giant egg! Is that chocolate?!” Mk was right by it, looking over the super-sized egg thing.

“I got it from the store,” Frisk started with a matter-of-fact tone. “It was pretty hollow but mom helped me put cream inside, so it’s like those egg things you get from dad.”

“Cadbury... Eggs.” Chara slowly corrects. Realization struck her brain. Frisk and mom had made this for them.

Her heart swelled in the chest, rosy cheeks now venetian despite the grey paint. “Hey…” She couldn’t look Frisk in the eyes. “Sorry.”

“Trade this for your Rice Krispies and we good!” the boy gave a thumbs up.

“Sheesh,” Chara smiled, and reached for the bag she dropped. “I get it, I get it.” She didn’t meet a paper bag, instead her hands landed upon something fuzzy. She blinked and looked down.

Asriel was draped over his bed. Where the bag once was, his head was now. His green hat now on the floor, forgotten. He was chewing groggily, half-lidded eyes gazing at nothing in particular while a large mass of stringy, sticky taffy laid within his maw. Wrappers with nothing inside laid all over the bed. The bag was on the floor now, torn open.

Frisk grinned.

MK laughed.

Chara groans.

“...Uh?” Asriel tried to speak, however, the tough candy made it embarrassingly difficult.

“Hey dude!” Mk, popped in front of Frisk excitingly. “You got something big you can trade me?!”

“Fufufu!” The child laughs in the manner of a hero. He turned to Chara and handed them the monster of a creme egg. Then, he turned around and walked to his sack, shrouding it from prying eyes.

MK waited with a held breath as the human slowly rose, his arms held before him but close to hide what laid in his hands.

“Are you ready for this?” Frisk asked anonymously. He didn’t need to look back, he could feel the intensity of MK’s nods. He could hear the whisper of their draft. “Then get ready…

For the dragon!!”

“YOOOOOO!” Frisk had unveiled a stupidly thick gummy in the crude shape of a dragon head, about the size of, again, Frisk’s face.

“Where did you get these?” Chara balked.

Frisk closed eyes glinted and presented the gummy head with one hand and pointed at the star-struck monster. “For your ring pops, I’ll give you this! Deal?”

MK had like 8 of those.

“Deal!”

With the transaction concluded, Frisk happily handed the massive wyrm head to the monster who lifted it with his maw alone.

“Fris-” Before Chara could repeat her question, a knock came at the door, drawing all the children’s attention.

A laugh came as the door knob was turned. “I’m sorry to interrupt in on the fun-oh!” Toriel paused, seeing the state of the four. “I can see you’ve already begun trading. Well, I have to ask you to finish your candy for the time being.”

“Uh?” MK whines, gummy the size of a fist in his mouth. “Ow cooh?”

She couldn’t help her excitement. “Well, It was for the party later this evening, but I had so many ingredients I made a second chocolate pumpkin and snail pie!” she clapped. “I thought we could share that between ourselves before the rest arrive.”

The looks on Chara and Asriel’s faces would always confuse Frisk. Pumpkin and chocolate sounded good but they had a feeling there would be more snail out of the three.

“Hael?” MK questioned.

Asriel was first on his feet this time, a blur of rainbow met everyone in the room as he dashed out first.

“H-Hey! Wait Asriel!” Chara leapt after them. And MK soon followed after, though with far less enthusiasm than before. This left Toriel and Frisk.

The Boss Monster could only be amused by her child’s expression. She reaches out her hand. “Do not worry,” she gave a wink. “I had made a slice with no snails for yourself.”

And with that Frisk beams, racing for their mother and gripping her hand tight. They were all-but dragging her out now, a toothy smile on their face.

Toriel laughed, “my, my.” And closed the door behind them, to go enjoy a treat with her children.

#Saving Dreemurrs #undertale au #frisk dreemurr #chara dreemurr #asriel dremuur #monsterkid #toriel dreemurr #post pacifist #undertale #Undertale: Saving Dreemurrs #fanfic #halloween #pie

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blackaquokat · 5 years ago

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Testify to the Bleeding Heart

Fandom: Who Killed Markiplier?

Pairing: DAtective (Abe x the District Attorney)

Summary: In which an unfortunate side effect of past tragedies comes to light during an intimate moment.

A/N: So while the next chapter of Satisfied kicks my butt, have this little DAtective drabble I wrote in a fit of inspiration back in April, half-inspired by a post @raimeyl made about their sister’s thoughts about Abe and what happens with his bullet wound. Go follow them if you haven’t, btw!

Some references are made to my series Law & Disorder, which you can read on ao3 here , because you may understand this better...no idea if this will be canon to the series or just a fun side piece , but still.

TW for blood and a touch of gore.

When you look back on this moment far later, you will have no recollection of how the hell it started.

Abe probably said something stupid, which is about as surprising as finding a fish underwater.

It is oddly intriguing, the way he throws about his words without thinking first. Where you have spent your entire life hoarding your words and arguments like a warrior hides weapons under their armor, every time Abe speaks, it’s like he throws a rock directly into a hornet’s nest and waits until the insects fly out before running off to safety.

Most times it leads to amusing situations. Other days it gets the bastard stung all over and you end up yelling at him for not watching his mouth—

Ah, right. That’s how it started.

You were thinking about Abe’s mouth, which lead to the memory of that soul-searing kiss you both shared before the world cracked open and swallowed you whole.

Now…

“You alright, Partner?”

Abe’s concern pries you from your musings. He’s standing by the tragically small dining room table (essentially a white plastic square with legs), arms folded across his chest.

You don’t know what it is about the Detective that suddenly makes you brave, but you know for a fact that whatever this is between the both of you?

It’s special. It’s real.

It hurts like a bitch, it burns your veins and cracks your heart, it makes you smile like an idiot, and gives you more hope than anything else in your life.

(You had considered kissing him long before the alcohol melted into your system at that doomed party, if only to keep him from digging his own grave by opening his mouth and speaking. Had you known what would happen afterward, you probably wouldn’t have stopped kissing him for the rest of the night.)

This is what you tell yourself as you approach Abe, stepping forward each time he steps back, which is only two steps until he’s up against the wall.

He’s staring at you with a strange mix of fear, arousal, and...possibly adoration.

You really hope you aren’t about to ruin the only good thing left in your life.

You stop when your toes touch his. This is his chance to push you away. You’ll understand. It will probably hurt you beyond repair, and that will be the final sign that love just isn’t something meant for you, but as long as you can keep Abe in your life, as long as he’s still your friend, you’ll get through it.

“Is there a reason you’re trying to trigger my sense of deja vu, Partner?” The shaking in his voice doesn’t sound like fear.

That’s a good sign, you think. “So you remember this too?”

“Oh, very vividly. Especially once the hangover wore off.”

His sarcastic tone makes you smile. “So you know how this moment is supposed to end.”

Uncertainty lines the exhaustion in his eyes. “I never expected a repeat performance. Considering, you know, we were both dead for a while, and...at least part of it was my fault.”

You still think you’re cursed, Abe?

You think that scares me?

You never understood that maybe I’m cursed, too.

Your hand reaches forward and touches the edge of his suspenders, almost reverently. The article of clothing does strange, gymnast worthy things to your heart.

(No one has the right to make suspenders look this damn attractive.)

“Well, how about now?”

Abe doesn’t answer. He just stares at you with a longing so painful it stops the air in your throat.

Screw it.

You grab hold of his suspender strap and use it to pull him to you. Your foreheads bump together gently. A beat passes, time for one of you to bow out if that’s the case, and then you close the remaining space.

And it’s butterflies brushing their wings underneath your skin, it’s slow heat turning to a boil in your chest, this is all the gentleness neither of you never got to have, a lifetime of struggle and loss and pain, but the two of you have earned this brushing of lips, the tips of his fingers grazing your jaw, your hand slipping to the back of his neck—

You are all hard edges and bitterness, and so is Abe. You both have bled and snapped off pieces of yourselves for the sake of this awful, unfair world.

You’ve earned the right for a soft touch. You deserve to be treated like spun glass, just for this brief breath of time.

And Abe deserves to be treated like he’s magic.

Curse or no curse, he has magic in his touch that sparks through your veins like white hot electricity.

Seconds later, an eternity, a few heartbeats, maybe a million, and your lips shift to his cheek and down to his jaw.

He makes a sound like he’s in pain and you stop. Pull away. Clear your throat.

“Sorry, I…” You step back to give him space but he grips your upper arm and pulls you right back to him. Your hand lands on his chest.

You feel something wet and look down. Your eyes widen.

“No, it’s...I’m okay, I just…” He ducks his head. His other hand comes up to your neck, his thumb brushing gently against the steady thud of your pulse. “I’m trying to remind myself that I’m not dead. That this is really—”

“Um...Abe?”

“Yeah?”

“There’s, uh, there’s blood on your shirt?”

“What?”

Abe looks down and sees what you only just noticed: a blossoming scarlet stain spreading across his chest. Your hand lifts from the shirt stained with red and trembling.

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” He shakes his head. The lack of panicking over his bleeding chest is disquieting. “That...that happens, sometimes, when my heart gets going.”

“It—what? Wait, is that where you were shot?” The observation shocks you into action. You grab Abe’s wrist and drag him to the kitchen. “Jesus Christ, Abe! You might have said something!”

“In my defense,” he says as he watches you rifle through the drawers for rags, “I was a little distracted.”

Oh, as soon as you get him stitched back up and he stops bleeding all over the floor, you will punch him in the face.

And maybe kiss him again.

Barring that doing such a thing won’t make him bleed like a damn waterfall again.

Please reblog and comment! If you want to be tagged/untagged, please message me!

@starcrossedforever87 , @dontworryaboutanything , @beereblogsstuff , @falseroar , @intemperantiae , @ren-mon , @memetoyoko , @soul-wolf , @marki-dumb , @withjust-a-bite , @scribbeetle , @its-dari , @silver-owl413 , @sassy-in-glasses , @chelseareferenced , @sketchy-scribs-n-doods , @axolittle-boi , @skidspace , @peaceiplier , @wkm-detective-abe-squad , @veryobsessivefan , @lizard-in-a-skinsuit , @babymadz , @statictay

#wkm #who killed markiplier #kat writes #datective #abe the detective #y/n district attorney #yeah so this started off suuuuuper intimate and i didn't know how to kill the mood #then i remembered the post that raimeyl made all those months ago #and here we are now #no way to kill a mood like a gushing bullet wound

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dietaku · 5 years ago

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Amazing Quest 2: Chapter 1

The sequel to Amazing Quest. Honestly, I think this one is better.

-Controls-

Have you played an SNES-era JRPG before? Then you already know this.

-Cast-

Dood Z. Ma--

Wait, you haven't played an SNES-era JRPG before? Sigh. Okay then.

-Controls-

Control Pad – Move your characters or your cursor around, select things, etc.

A Button – Check/Speak/Confirm. You'll be using this a lot for obvious reasons.

B Button – Cancel. In battle, you can set this as a shortcut for Defend.

X Button – Open/Close Menu. In battle, you can use this to shortcut to your items menu. In the strategy guide, it lists this being used to launch things called the Push-of-War and the Dynamite Trigger. This is clearly not true, and has since become memetic in the fandom, where newcomers with questions that should be obvious are met with jeering posts of “Use the Dynamite Trigger!”

Y – Hold to dash on the overworld. In battle, this shortcuts to the Skill/Spell menu.

L/R – Rotates party members in order either back or forth.

Start – Pause the game. Also, in certain circumstances, unpauses it too.

Select – Opens the world map. Runs a 1/8126 chance of showing a pixelated green and black scene of Dood talking to some old man with a beret, who tells you to “SEEK DA TROOF”.

-Cast-

Dood Z. Male

Element: Light

Class: Pudding Warrior

Weapon: Swords. Four to be exact.

Special: Pudding Morph

Dood, as later side materials would go on to reveal, is the descendant of Hiro from AQ1, though with Pudding powers not dependent on the presence of others. Guess eugenics lost the bet on that one. Dood, like all AQ protags, can transform into the powerful Pudding Forms, but his have three-turn limiters where his MP is rapidly consumed away, however, this can be prolonged by feeding him MP restoration items. His stats are bolstered very, very high during this period, and can thus be a very potent character if built right.

Deliost Nu Toruble Element: N/A (Fire after her mid-game Time Wasp shenanigans) Class: Magic Student Weapon Type: Spoons Special Technique: Magical Assault

The quiet, reflective princess of Toruble, who is kept locked away from public viewing, due to her ever-growing chimeran traits (manifesting as kawaii cat eats and tail). She is a powerful offensive magic user, who only grows more potent as time goes on. However, she personifies the phrase “glass cannon” and has very low LP and Con scores for the duration. Also of note is her impressive figure, which I'm sure is an ancillary detail (You perverts.)

Kylie

Element: Earth (Default Form); Changes with Form

Class: Womanticore

Weapons: Variable Tail (Equippable Genes)

Special: Multi-Form

Kylie the womanticore was the result of a “DiY Womanticore Kit” project launched by the recurring miniboss fight, Balzac, who ended up escaping her captivity and mastering a life in the forest. Kylie is a “build your own” character, where she can equip up to three genes at a time, one in the “Head” slot, one in the “Body” slot, and one in the “Leg” slot. Her default form has middling stats and only a few skills it can learn on its own, but once she learns a skill from a particular gene, she will retain it forever, even if the gene is unequipped later on. Fans really like her, for... multiple reasons. Don't look! She's only 2 years old!

Genki Sake

Element: Wind

Class: Cat Thief

Weapons: Hair Clip

Special: Steal

Genki is of the kunoichi tribe (presumably of some relation to Kimyawa of AQ1, but that's just fan speculation), and strives to be the greatest cat thief of all time. In a very literal sense even, as her suit includes cat ears and a cleavage window you could lose mid-sized dogs in. Her weapons are hidden in plain sight, as she uses his hair clips as both weapons and tools of her trade to unlock doors and chests. When she's on point, she'll even automatically disable traps and she'll stop before running over trap floors. She has high attack and speed stats, but somewhat lacking in defense. And, to put the obnoxious fandom argument to rest, Sake is her family name and Genki is her given name. Now, stop fighting about it!

Chester D. Beaver

Element: Water, yup

Class: Beaver, yup

Weapons: Fish Guns, yup

Special: Spray, yup

Chester is quite an odd bucket of fish – literally and metaphorically. Being of the beaver tribe, he has a rather distinct means of punctuating most of his sentences, and as a mob boss over the beaver crime syndicates (which exist, apparently) he commands respect in such social circles. His spray attack allows him to make his normal attack target all enemies, which calculates damage akin to how all-hitting magic spell variants are done, and his bizarre fish gun series of weapons is always a joy to see in motion. He has high, all around stats, but very few skills to his name until almost at the endgame.

Deima the Immortal Element: N/A Class: Furry (Just Kidding) Weapon Type: Staves Special Technique: Magical Genocide

The eccentric and powerful chimera sorceress and eternal Pudding ally, Deima appears once more as a secret recruit you can find at around the midgame. She learns spells much faster and much earlier in the game than anyone else and has, bar none, the highest magical potency of the game and the biggest MP pools of any of the party, in particular her Hissatsu Zeikei Suki attack. Her field ability will also turn any animals you can hunt into burnt meat automatically, so, try not to use it!

Jaydea Varas Schoen Element: Dark Class: Pudding Noble Weapon Type: “Heaven's Blades” Guitars Special Technique: Regal Pudding Form

The Penultimate boss of AQ1 returns thanks to her gift of eternal life bestowed on her by the Goddess of Destruction. She retains her insane Pudding form, the Figgy Pudding Queen, and her love of Rock n' Roll. If you go out of your way near the tail end of the game and get her her fez and a Black Cow, you can have her join you, doubling your effective Pudding-related firepower. She has a stat build not unlike Dood's, but a heavier emphasis on defense, presumably reflective of her immortality. She does not want for offensive options, though, and will hold her own quite handily.

-Chapter 1: I'm Born! ~ Lone Idiot & Cub-

The game starts with a narrator speaking over a black screen.

Narrator: Nearly a century has passed since the legendary Hero-King of the Puddings sealed away the wicked goddess, Hulst.

JeffCom's translation team was not on point here. She was called Halst in the first game, Hulst in the second, and it wasn't until AQ3 where they finally got her actual name, Holstein, in the game correctly.

Narrator: When the red star appeared in the night sky, people called it the “Eye of Calamity” and said it was an omen of dark things yet to come. The people were without the heroes of legend and uncertainty took deep root in the tumultuous times. As a result, the Church of Sethan became home to many, seeking peace of mind and a road to hope, but not all was as it appeared to be.

Then, the image of a deformed skull appears on screen, in the center of what should be the forehead is a large, pulsating eye.

???: ****! Be careful!

Skull: I shall bring forth my revenge. Your efforts to stop me are in vain!

???: Oh yeah?! EAT THIS!

The Skull gets a large slash across its face. Uh, skull. Whatever.

Skull: Insolent Puddings! This is the will of the very stars themselves!

???: This is too dangerous! It's destabilizing!

???: But we're so close, ******! We can stop it now! ???: There's no time. Go on without me!

Skull: Trying to escape?! I won't let--

???: NOT WITHOUT A FALL GUY, BITCH! GLADIATOR!!! Skull OH SHIIIIIIIIII--!!!

The screen whites out then comes back in, late in the evening as some young boy in ragged clothes, with four sheaths around his belt stumbles into view.

Boy: … Huh? Wait... where...? Oh, I don't feel so good...

The boy shakily takes a few paces before falling flat.

Boy: Ungh! My face is in the dirt, isn't it?

The boy lies there for a moment as a well-to-do girl walks on screen, clad in a yellow ribbon and matching dress.

Girl: ! What?!

She hurries over to him and, for a moment, looks like she's going to help him up. Instead, she whips out a stick and begins poking him in the head.

Girl: Hey, are you dead?

Boy: …

After a moment of this, an elderly man in a suit, identified only as Butler, walks over.

Butler: I see. M'lady, allow me, if you would.

The butler, quite violently, kicks the boy.

Butler: WAKE UP, TWERP! THE LADY HAS DEMANDED YOU ACKNOWLEDGE HER!

Boy: OH GOD, THAT WAS MOST CERTAINLY ONCE SOMETHING VITAL!!!

The boy leaps awake and steps away from the two.

Boy: What was that all about?!

Butler: It's rude not to reply to a lady's inquiry! You vagabond!

Boy: Your... mom... is a bag of bonds...

Girl: What's your name?

Boy: I'm Dood.

Girl: I'm Deliost. Want to be friends? Dood: Sure, why not?

Deliost: Fantastic! Daddy always said I need to make some friends! And the last time I tried to make some, it didn't pan out so well.

Dood: Why not? Differences in hobbies?

Deliost: No, I tried to literally make them. Like build them. Out of straw and rocks. My therapist says I'm making great strides, though!

Dood: Great...

Deliost: I don't really get to go out and do much. Even when I do I have to stay close to the castle.

Dood: There's a castle? Deliost: Indeed. I am the princess of the kingdom of Toruble.

Dood: … What's a Toruble?

Butler: Shall I teach the boy a lesson, m'lady? Deliost: Please, do.

The Butler socks Dood in the face, knocking him out cold.

Deliost: BUTLER?! Butler: There. Lesson learned.

Deliost: I meant open a history book and tell him about the Toruble Kingdom! Butler: Oh. … Bully. Now I just feel silly.

The scene fades out, then returns with Dood laying in a bed.

Dood: Boy, I sure hope I get to maintain consciousness for longer than 10 minute intervals today. That'd be swell.

Deliost walks in.

Deliost: Dood, are you okay? Dood: I'm fine. I think.

Deliost: That's a relief!

A tall man in regal splendor walks in.

King: And this...? Deliost: This is Dood. You said I could keep him!

The King goes to Dood and eyes him.

King: You'd better take good care of my little girl, you got that? One step out of line and--

Dood: Sir. I'm pretty sure I'm like 10 years old. Probably. 10-ish.

Suddenly, some guards rush in.

Knight: Y-your highness! Monster attack! King: What you say?!

The scene cuts outside, as we see a knight get knocked down by some munchkins.

Knight: No!! Knight 2! He was the finest mind of his generation!!

Dood suddenly rushes outside.

Deliost: Dood, what are you--?!

Dood: It's fightin' time!!

Dood leaps into battle with the munchkins. This works as your tutorial, with the game briefly explaining Attack, Defend, Skill, Item, and Flee options that any RPG veteran should be very familiar with. If you try to flee from this battle, the munchkins hold up a pistol to a teddy bear's head and Dood insists it would be unjust to leave it as-is. But as Munchkins die to one attack each from Dood and his high offense build, it'll only take a moment. If you ignore the tutorials for Defend, Skill, and Item, and keep attacking, the game will let you do so, but scold you for not paying attention.

Dood: Hyaaa!!

Munchkins: Run away! Run away!!!

Deliost: Whoa, Dood... that was so brave! How did you do that?! Dood: Oh, it's easy.

Dood takes out one of his swords and points.

Dood: The pointy end is the business end.

Deliost: That's... not what I... okay. Sure. Alright.

Knight: That was incredible swordsmanship! Who taught you? Dood: … Um...?

Knight: You... do have a teacher, right?

You then get a prompt...

My parents!

My Master!

The Sun!

What's a teacher?

If you select My parents!

Dood: My parents!

Knight: Who are you parents? Dood: …

Tears well up in Dood's eyes.

Dood: Uwaaaaaaaah! I'm an orphan?!

Deliost: You didn't know that until just now?!

If you select My master!

Dood: My master! Knight: Who was your master?

Dood: … My Master. Obvs.

Knight: Yes, but what was his name? Dood: Mr. Ster.

Knight: You don't remember his name, do you? Dood: No.

If you select the sun!

Dood: THE SUN!!!

Deliost: What?

Dood: I stare into the sun and it fills me with power! Deliost: Dood, you really shouldn't do that...

If you select What’s a teacher?

Dood: … What's a teacher?

Deliost: Something you appear to be in dire need of...

Knight: … Well, your skills are undeniable! Maybe you should take up some work at the guild!

Dood: Work sounds good. Then I could buy MORE SWORDS!

Deliost: Um! Um! Yes, Dood, let us go and do good by the people!

Deliost grabs Dood's hand and pulls him off-screen as the knights idle. The camera soon catches up to them on a small dirt road.

Dood: Where are we going so fast?

Deliost: Anywhere! Now's our chance to get out and get away from the castle for a bit! C'mon!

Dood: Um. Okay!

You're then whisked away to FirstTown, where you're free to go around and talk to NPCs at your leisure. Here we can find a basic item and weapon shop, alongside a place with a sword and shield icon, wherein lies the guild and the plot. Inside is a lady in a dirndl is stationed at the counter.

Woman: Welcome, I am the guild stewardess. I'll post side miss-- I mean-- important jobs that you can accept here at the counter. In fact, there's a guild location in every city of the world, and due to our lightning-quick messaging services, we can relay information and jobs from all over the world to any location in a very convenient fashion!

Deliost: Ooo. What kind of work can we do here?

Dood: I wanna kill a dragon.

Deliost: Dood... do you know what a dragon... is? Dood: No, but I know I wanna fight one! Stewardess: No dragon slaying today, but I do have this. This might be a good test of your abilities.

Dood receives quest: find lost dog.

Dood: A lost dog?! That's... the saddest thing... I ever h-heeeeeeeeard!!!

Dood bawls.

Deliost: I had no idea you were so in-tune with your emotions, Dood! You're kind of like a puppy yourself...

Dood: I am? Deliost: Yeah. Like one of those small ones that never really gets terribly smart, and sometimes pees the floor out of excitement, but they mean well.

Dood: Aww, that's nice of you to say!

Now we can access the nearby inn, or leave town and see the world map. We're sort of stuck on a linear path for the time being, but we ultimately need to head to the north, near the mountains, but I wouldn't recommend going there until you're level 3 or 4, just to be safe.

Dood: I think it went this way!

Deliost: You can determine where the dog went... how?

Dood: Well, it's easy. To find a dog, you gotta think like a dog.

Deliost: You can do that? Dood: Watch me.

Dood gets down on all fours.

Dood: Woof! Woof! Barf, barf, barf!

Deliost: …

Deliost puts a hand to her mouth, trying not to laugh. You're then free to explore the mountain road. As you do, you'll see a deer munching grass.

Deliost: Dood, wait a sec.

Dood: What?

Deliost: Look there.

Dood: … Is that a dragon? Deliost: … Huh? No! Dood, it's a deer.

Dood: I'm-a kill it anyway.

Deliost: What?!

You then gain control of Dood and you're prompted to tap “Y” when near the deer, which you can sneak up on if you time it right. Dood will slash with his sword, turning the deer into large, cartoon meat on a bone. Deliost does her best impression of The Scream as Dood picks up and presents the meat.

Dood: I killed a dragon! Deliost: Uuuugh... I suppose hunting is a way to get supplies when our coffers are low... but... oh, Dood...

Now, when a random encounter concludes, there's a chance, depending on what map you're on, that a hunting event can occur, where you can kill some wildlife to get items. Dood hits with his sword, and will usually yield a meat, an item that restores health usually, and Deliost throws a small spark of electricity which is good for taking down small birds which Dood can't hit. As you go through the cave here, there's a healing spring.

Deliost: This is... it is. If we drink this water, it'll refresh us, body and mind. It's just like a good night's rest, Dood. … Dood?

Deliost looks over. Dood is shirtless.

Dood: So, we bathe in it, right? Deliost: KYAAAAAA!!! PERVERT!!!

Deliost gets a violent nosebleed, then smacks Dood in the face with her spoon. This sends Dood careening back into the wall.

Dood: BARF!

Dood and Deliost learn their first dual skill: Dood Toss, where Deliost swats Dood in the back, hurling him into the enemy for large damage. From here, you should grind at least a little, then proceed to the end of the cave. As you exit the cave, be sure you save, as not far from the entrance is the boss. Dood and Deliost walk a bit before the creature crosses their path. It's a duck with horns and large, pronounced feet.

Dood: Is that...?

Deliost: It is! It's a--

Dood: DRAGON!

Deliost: Dood! No! It's a Jackoduck!!

-Boss Fight!-

Jackoduck

LP: 500

MP: 100

The Jackoduck is strong, only because it's HP is very high compared to what you're likely used to at this point. However, it doesn't have many abilities of note, mostly involving its Duckaphony attack, which will hit you both for small damage. If you heal as needed, there shouldn't be any issue here, especially as at level 6 Deliost gets the first lightning spell, which deals good damage against it.

-Boss Fight!-

Dood: Whew. That wasn't so ba--

The Jackoduck gets up and bites Dood's arm

Dood: Oooooh nooooo! Deliost! Shoot it! Shoot it!!! Deliost: But it's still connected to you! Electricity will--

Dood: I don't care! Just shoot it! Deliost: Well, okay.

Deliost raises her hand as a massive storm of lightning drops down on Dood and the Jackoduck.

Dood: BARF!!!

The Jackoduck explodes and Dood drops.

Dood: I killed a dragon.

Deliost: Sigh...

You're then free to leave the mountain and you'll exit on the other side, whereupon you'll find... a frog.

Frog: Ribbit.

Dood: Is it--

Deliost: It's not a dragon, Dood!!!

Dood: No, obviously, it isn't.

Deliost: Oh, thank goodness...

Dood: It's the dog we've been looking for! Deliost: Say WHAT?!

Dood got... dog? Now we can head back to FirstTown. Once there, go to the guild.

Dood: We saved the dog! See? Frog: Ribbit.

Deliost: I'm sorry, he's slow on the uptake.

Stewardess: Ehn. Seems legit. Here's 500 currencies.

Dood: Yay!

Deliost's jaw falls and hangs open.

Dood: What next? Stewardess: Nothing right now, I'm afraid. But if you're curious, there's a new monster battle ring in the west where they've got a really neat lineup for the Monster Girl Festa.

Deliost: The... what?

Dood: Sounds kosher. Let's go!

You then can travel westward and enter into Corset, the mini-town that surrounds the coliseum area. Inside, you can't actually access the coliseum, due to a huge herd of people clamoring to battle with the monster girl champ, Balzac. Everyone in this town will tell you that to be anybody in this town, you have to win big at the coliseum, and that if you don't have one, a few stray monster girls run wild in the forest. You can tell this was a 90's RPG, as this, alongside a noteworthy minigame in AQ1 was wildly lambasted by Amelia Sardinian as the reasons why JeffCom+DTK and all its affiliates should, and I quote, “die horribly”. Anyway, we can go out into the forest and enter a little maze area where the enemies just love to spam poison as an ailment. The Mushroom Men, Dire Sparrows, and Vorpal Earthworms are indeed annoying, but if you brought lots of antidotes with you, it shouldn't be awful. At the end of it, you'll reach a clearing, where something considerably larger than you is leaping around the canopy, circling you.

Deliost: I don't think we're alone, Dood...

Dood: How can we be alone when there's two of us?

Deliost: I mean there's someone else here with us, Dood!

Dood: I didn't see anything.

The shadow blazes overhead again.

Deliost: There! Didn't you see that? Dood: Sorry, I can't see anything. I'm busy checking my eyelids for cracks.

Deliost grabs Dood's head and yanks it so he's looking up, just in time for the shadow to ninja past them again.

Dood: Whoa! There's someone here! Deliost: No, really?!

The shadow leaps down before them, revealing a curvaceous monster girl with large claws, long hair, and a long, scorpion-like tail.

Dood: It's...! It's...!

Deliost: Dood! Do not say “Dragon”!

Dood: … I'm still gonna think it.

The woman roars.

-Boss Fight!-

Womanticore

LP: 800

MP: 300

This is your wake-up boss fight. She follows up almost all her attacks with “Waffle Iron”, where she strikes with her claws after her normal attack, or she'll use “Mode Change” where she'll change color and use an elemental strike. She also has a huge pool of HP by comparison to anything we'd encountered. When her health dips below 25%, she'll give up using Waffle Iron, and grab one of your two characters with her tail, immobilizing them until the other hits her a few times, forcing her to drop them. This can be super frustrating, so heal early, heal often.

-Boss Fight!-

Monster Woman: Graaaaa--!!!

She falls.

Dood: I KILLED A D-- I mean... nothing.

Deliost rolls her eyes. The Monster Woman suddenly begins flailing, pounding her fists, feet, and tail up and down on the ground.

Monster Woman: Nooooo! It's not faaaair! I'm so hungry! All I want is a candy bar! But all there are to eat out here are bunnies and squirrels and they're TOO CUTE TO EAT! And the berries, good lord, the berries empty me out!!! A-bloo-bloo-blooooo!!!

She begins crying, with exaggerated anime water fountain tears and everything.

Dood: I can safely say I was not expecting that.

Deliost: Oh dear... maybe we should apologize to her?

Approach and speak to her, but all she does is continue her tantrum, reiterating how much she wants a candy bar. For now, we have to leave and return to FirstTown's item shop, which just got a fresh batch of Candy Bar items in, which we can buy on the cheap. For zenny vs. healing, candy bars are actually more economical than mundane potions, amusingly enough! Anyways, take at least one and go back to the Womanticore.

Monster Woman: W-w-what do you want? Sniffle. Hic.

Dood: Here!

Dood gave her the candy bar!

Monster Woman: … Ah! A candy bar?!

She hurriedly unwraps it, break it in half, and feeds half to her tail and eats half with her mouth.

Dood: … Pssst! Deliost! She just ate that with her butt! … Does she poop out her mouth?!

Deliost: You're not whispering, you know. She can hear you just fine.

Monster Woman: I'm Kylie. Who are you? And why are two little kids wandering around the forest?

Dood: Oh, this is Del-- Deliost: I'M ENKI AND THIS IS DOO... uhh... DUDU!

Dood: … Huh?

Deliost: (Dood! I'm a runaway princess! We can't just go around telling everyone who we are! They'll take us back to the castle if we do that!) Dood: (Yeah, but, why do I have to be Dudu?) Deliost: (You started talking about pooping out your mouth, so it just popped into my head!)

Until it says otherwise, Dood is listed as Dudu and Deliost is listed as Enki, even on the menu screen.

Kylie: How... old are you two? Dudu: I'm... 10-ish? Yeah, let's go with that.

Enki: I'm 11.

Kylie: Hm. Well, I clearly have to be the adult here, seeing as I'm 2!

Dudu: That makes sense! Enki: It... doesn't really. But we can just tell people she's 20 and they'd believe it...

Kylie: I'll go with you! That way we'll be safe!

Kylie joins! She is a customizable character, who starts with three copies of the “Womanticore” gene. As you get more, you can customize her, which changes her Head (her hair and horns), her Body (mostly her arms and color palette), and her Legs (which alters her legs and tail). This has made her very popular, as some late game combinations can be game-breaking, due to any gene being able to slot into any of the three options. Her starting skill is Roar, which ups one character's offense for a few turns. At this point, we can return to Corset and the crowd huddled around the door to the coliseum has dispersed. Inside, we can now register for the battle!

Receptionist: I see. Entering the Monster Girl battle with this Womanticore, eh? Well, if you want to do so, you'll need to pass our preliminary match against our director of monster resources!

Dudu: Kay.

Kylie: Me?! But aren't there younger, prettier monster girls you'd want to enter?!

Enki: Actually, I'd be legitimately surprised if there were any monsters here younger than you...

Now we can head over to a small dungeon-like room, to find a horrifyingly muscular man, whose head appears to be too small for his frame.

Dir. Of MR: OH YEEEEEEEEEEAH! Dudu: … I think I peed myself a little in reflective terror.

Enki: Me too.

-Boss Fight!-

Director of Monster Resources

LP: 500

MP: 0

This guy is a joke boss, if his LP didn't tip you off. He just shouts “AGE?! SEX?! LOCATION?!” at you and punches, which barely does any damage. There's literally no reason you should lose here if you're trying.

-Boss Fight!-

Dir. Of MR: OH YEEEEEEEEEEAH!!!

Dudu: I guess we passed?

Kylie: Yay!

At this point, you're invited to speak to the manager, July.

July: Ah, the new rising stars here to challenge Balzac, I presume? Dudu: I don't know why but the answer is “Yes”!

July: Lucky you, your opponent is a girl, so it'll be easy! Kylie: But... I'm a girl too... what's that have to do with anything?

July: Well, the truth is... the outcome is already set.

Enki: What? The fight is a farce?!

Dudu: And it's fake too?!

July: The cruel up-n-comer, who wants to win at any cost... slowly tortures her enemy... and kills her for the sick entertainment of this crowd! … I expect very high ratings.

Kylie's face goes pale, as her tail turns downward and actually vomits.

July: There is no way you will lose, Dudu. During the battle's climax, we will fire poisoned darts at the enemy monster. She will die and you will win. The ratings will explode through the roof as the old champ is unseated, and we will become very, very rich...

Dudu: We... uh... need to... go... place... now.

July: Be sure to get your advanced payment from your locker room!

Go there, and you'll get 1000 zenny. Immediately head out and deposit it in the bank, then return and try to go into Balzac's prep room.

Dudu: Balzac! Balzac!!

Enki: Dudu, what are you doing? Dudu: We have to warn him! We have to protect his monster girl!

Balzac: I can't sign autographs right now! I'm, uh, preparing my girl for battle! Y-yeah, that's the ticket.

Kylie: It's no good. We'll have to do something else.

Kylie paces back and forth as her tail scratches her head.

Kylie: Ah! I got it!

Kylie's tail snaps like fingers as a light bulb lights up over her head.

Kylie: Dudu, let me borrow your coin purse!

Dudu: It's a coin pouch.

Kylie: Now's not the time to argue over your fragile masculinity. Hand it over!

Dudu gave Kylie all his money.

Kylie: I'm gonna get two antidotes. When I fight his monster, we'll both take one and then we'll be safe! Dudu: Great idea!

Enki: Be honest. You're taking all his money so you can stock up on candy bars, aren't you?

Kylie's tail nods.

Kylie: No! … Yes.

She hurriedly walks off screen.

Enki: Aren't you upset?! Dudu: Not if she gives me one!

Enki: Ugh...

You then take over as Kylie solo. At this point, you now have two antidotes in your key items, so you can get your money back and do any prep you need to before the fight. When you're ready, go inside and go to to the arena floor. There, a huge crowd excitedly cheers. Opposite you is a strange, cyclopean cat girl creature.

Kylie: Hi! I'm Kylie!

Monster Girl: Hmph! You're goin' down!

Balzac: Yeah! What she said!

-Boss Fight!-

Cat-oblepas

LP: 600

MP: 800

While Cat-oblepas (ugh, the puns) lacks the raw hitting power of Kylie, she has the ability to turn her to stone for one round with her “Cat's Eye” technique. In itself, this does no damage, but it gives her an opening to hit you before you can act again. If you leveled her a bit, Kylie should have the “Lick Wounds” skill which restores HP to one target, and is generally more efficient than the healing items you'll have access to at this point. This is a war of attrition and you'll be going back and forth and sometimes the random off-chance that is Critical Hitting or Counter Attacking can shift the tide, resulting in some infuriating lucksacking scenarios. Just be patient and you'll win!

-Boss Fight!-

Dudu: Kylie! Knock her out! Quickly! Enki: What he means is SHOVE HER OUT OF HARM'S WAY! The way he's saying makes it sound useless and vague, as she's already unconscious!

At this point, you have a few moments to act and push the KO'd Cat-oblepas out of harm's way. If you do, Kylie immediately chugs an antidote (one for her tail, one for her face) and presents a hearty thumbs-up to the player. If you don't, she force-feeds an antidote to Cat-oblepas and drinks one, but faints and you'll have to take on the next boss without her. Either way, this event gives Kylie her first customizable gene – Poison! The next scene is just the party walking to July's office.

July: What's the matter? You didn't like my script, Dudu? Dudu: MY NAME IS NOT DUDU. I AM DOOD.

Enki: Because that's so much different...

July: Come at me, bro, I'm fekken ripped!!

July bursts into smoke as the boss fight cues. An amusing point, Dood's name in Japanese is read as “Doo-dii”, so what he's actually screaming is “I AM NOT DOO-DOO, I'M DOO-DII,” because apparently JeffCom has 13 year olds as writers.

-Boss Fight!-

July

LP: 1200

MP: 500

If there was really a battle that you run the risk of losing in chapter 1, it's this one. He hits like a truck, can use Waffle Iron, can hit the entire party with ice damage, and also, you can accidentally end up fighting him and be a party member-down! So definitely come here with Kylie. Deliost should also have her fire spells at this point, which you'll want to use liberally here, as they'll do maximum damage against this guy. Dood should stick to attacking, and have Kylie use whatever buffs she has at the ready when you arrive. If she's a sufficiently high level, she should have “Proud Cry” which ups defense, which Deliost should definitely have cast on her. This guy doesn't have any weird tricks or gimmicks. It's just a heavy clash of titans here. Do your best.

-Boss Fight!-

July: N-no way! My script... run through the shredder?! Impossible...! B-but don't think for a second that just knocking me down will stop our God's wrath!

Kylie: You try to murder and deceive, yet speak of God?! What deity does one as sick as you worship?!

July: BARF!

July explodes.

Kylie: … I wasn't expecting that.

Dood: Wow. July was a real monster over his profits! Deliost: That joke sucked!!

And you then leave, concluding Chapter 1!

#Adventure #fiction #fantasy #science fantasy #writing #infrequently asked questions #Amazing Quest

2 notes · View notes

atmilliways · 6 years ago

Note

Are you still doing the prompt thing? If so can you do 46 please?

I am always and forever doing the prompt thing, gentle reader. Sorry for taking so long.

(prompt meme)

This one is “Nathan, baby.” I’ve actually written something for this before, which you can read here if you like, but here’s something fresh off the top of my brain as well. In other news, this was originally going to be a different pairing, but it, ah… took a turn. In other other news, Skwisgaar is a sex addict and no one is surprised.

–

When Toki first joined the band, they all figured he was the youngest out of all five of them. He was scrawny, kind of high-voiced, and relentlessly optimistic. It was the natural assumption. Even Toki had thought that. Then it came out — at some point after their new manager had tracked down Toki’s birth certificate and obtained things like a work visa and valid passport on his behalf — that he was born in late March. Which would have been fine. Except… Nathan had been born in May. Of the same year. The jokes were relentless, and there wasn’t really anywhere he could go in their shitty shared apartment to escape them. Doesch baby want hisch bottle?Mine eyes ams older then yours, can you reads what dats say to me?Dood, I’m gonna have ta see some ID before I letcha have this. Yous, kid! Gets off my lawn!You’re the youngescht, you get up and do it. So, whens am you olds enough to drink legalies?Jest call me Grandpa! … Wait, no, don’t do theat. I’m drunk. … Sonny. Nathan hadn’t wanted to strangle a group of guys to death more since he’d made the varsity football team at fourteen and the older boys had singled him out for hazing. And the most unfair part of it all was that when he confronted Offdensen — whose fault all of this obviously was — in his swanky corner office in the nice part of the business district, the guy wouldn’t let him throttle so much as one of the bastards. “We, ah, can’t afford to miss any performances this quarter,” Charles explained patiently, “and, well, giving any of your bandmates a beating might injure their arms or hands, rendering them unable to play. Crystal Mountain won’t appreciate their newest signed band having to postpone their first official tour.”Nathan growled in frustration. Charles raised an eyebrow. “I could… speak to the rest of the guys on your behalf, if you want.”“No! That’ll just make it worse.” Nathan slouched angrily into one of the chairs in front of the desk. “Fuck. Who cares if I’m younger than Toki? It’s only by a month and a half, and I’ve done way more shit than that fucktard. Did you know we had to explain what sex was to him a couple weeks ago? He didn’t even know.”“I see.” Pausing only to jot down a note for later on a post-it, Charles folded his hands and regarded the frontman seriously. Which Nathan appreciated, because Charles wasn’t giving him any crap or just saying something dismissive and waving him off so he could get more work done. “Perhaps it would help to brainstorm some, ah, ways you might demonstrate that being the youngest doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be taken seriously.”Nathan blinked. “Uh… okay. Well… I’m the leader, right? Dethklok is my band.”“Yes, that’s one point,” Charles said. “But that might be a little on the abstract side. Best to play to your strengths, Nathan.” “You just told me I couldn’t punch or tackle anybody!”“First of all, not exactly. I told you not to punch and tackle your band mates in order to facilitate solving this particular problem, at least for now.” Charles inclined his head just a bit. “Secondly, that would be too easy. You are by far in the best physical condition out of anyone in Dethklok — although remind me to have a conversation with you about the results from your most recent liver panel, once this has been resolved.”Maybe it was shallow, but Nathan perked up a little at the compliment, while at the same time tuning out that bit about his liver completely. “You think so?”Charles nodded and steepled his fingers. “Absolutely. Toki is probably the next strongest, but he’s still recovering from the effects of malnutrition and a few other downsides of living on the streets.”Nathan found himself nodding in agreement. “Yeah, he keeps complaining about those rabies shots. I mean, it’s just a shot, why does he have to be such a pussy about it? I wish I were at risk for rabies, fucking brutal…” “Yes, well.” Charles gave him a perfunctory smile. “I wouldn’t know about that. But I hope this little chat has helped and that, ah, we should be able to stay on schedule for the upcoming tour?”It was pretty clear after that that Charles had work he wanted to get done, so Nathan left. He walked back to the apartment, hands in his pockets, idly mulling over some ideas for a song about getting bitten by a bat and turning into a rabid vampire while knowing he probably wouldn’t do anything with it. What Charles had said in his office had made sense to Nathan, at the time. The longer he walked, though, the more dissatisfied he felt. Advice was all well and good, and getting compliments on his physical prowess was a decent bonus, but it didn’t actually settle anything. So he couldn’t actually hurt any of the guys — that was fine, he could figure out some way around that. He just had to beat them at something. Maybe even just one of them. … Toki. Toki was new, the weak link. All Nathan had to do was prove he was the crybaby. Once was probably all it would take to cement that reputation with the rest of the guys forever. When he finally reached the apartment, he was disappointed to see that the van was gone. They’d pooled their money, back before they’d really had any, and bought one of those white vans that only perverts owned — there had been a token effort to repaint the thing black, except they’d put Murderface in charge of getting paint and he’d gotten the wrong kind, so it looked even shittier but in a dull, lumpy kind of way. But the thing still ran, on a good day, and getting it to start usually meant celebrating with a bar crawl. Which was kind of a bummer to be left out of, but Nathan figured that at least it gave him more time to come up with a plan to take Toki down a notch. Maybe if he started scribbling down ideas in his trust notebook, something good would jump out at him. When he let himself into the dingy three-bedroom, he heard something. A soft, rhythmic squeaking. Heavy breathing… Two sets of heavy breathing. Nathan rolled his eyes in annoyance. It wasn’t exactly unusual for Skwisgaar to stay home and invite a skank (or three) over for some fun while the rest of them were out, but he and Nathan shared a room. He knew from experience that whatever the guy had going on in there could take hours. Better to just barge in with his eyes screwed mostly closed to avoid seeing anything that might scar him for life, get his notebook, and get the the hell out. Ideally without tripping over any discarded granny panties like last time. Ugh. Or maybe it would be someone young and actually still hot… It was a toss-up, really. You never knew with Skwisgaar.He put one hand on the doorknob, the other over his eyes, and bellowed, “Skwisgaar, I’m coming in!”Three things happened immediately. Nathan pushed the door open with a little too much emphasis, sending it against the adjoining wall with a bang. It bounced back and he caught it with both hands to keep from getting smacked in the face. Skwisgaar, with a yell of “WAITS,” tried to jump up and lunge for the door, but got his feet tangled in the blanket. He ended up rolling off the bed and landing on the floor with a hard thud. Toki shrieked and grabbed for a pillow to hide his naked chest. For a moment, there was nothing but deep, awkward silence as Skwisgaar picked himself up and sat on the edge of the bed with the blanket covering his lap. “What…” Nathan looked back and forth between the two guitarists, before finally settling his glare on the lead. “… the FUCK, Skwisgaar! What did I fucking tell you? No screwing anyone who’s in the band! That’s how your last seven bands ended up breaking up!”“Knowds I shouldn’t had tells you dat,” the Swede grumbled under his breath. “And you!” Nathan jabbed an accusatory finger in Toki’s direction. “What the hell are you doing, covering yourself up like a damn girl? You don’t have tits!”“Sorries,” Toki squeaked. He did not release his death grip on the pillow, or lower it even slightly. Nathan pinched the bridge of his nose, unconsciously mimicking something his mother had always done whenever she was particularly exasperated with him. “And god, don’t even get me started on how fucking gay this is. This is really going to fuck with the band dynamics.”“Pft, no it won’ts,” Skwisgaar said dismissively. “We’ve already beens fucking for a weeks and none of yous jackoffs notice, no big deals. Besides—” He smirked. “—I don’ts remembers no complaints to suckings yous off dat one times.”Toki’s eyes widened even further, and he stared at the frontman with a cross between nervous solidarity and mild jealousy. Through the roar of blood rushing to his face, Nathan wondered if it was possible to open your eyes so wide that your eyeballs just fell right out of their sockets. “That’s… different,” he mumbled. “We were both really drunk, so it didn’t count. And… I didn’t realize you remembered. That.” Just thinking about it, to his continued embarrassment, sent some of his blood rushing south as well. Drunk or not, that had been a pretty good night. “Well I does, so whats?” Skwisgaar shrugged, his long blond hair clinging slightly to his sweaty skin. Whatever he and Toki had been doing before Nathan had barged in, he must’ve been really into it. “You had never hads your cock sucks by a guy, and little Tokis here never hads sex with anothers porsons evers. Now you both has. No big deals, you don’t gots to be a bigs baby abouts it.”The word baby made Nathan’s eye twitch, and he was one hundred percent sure that was intentional. Part of that insight was gut instinct; the rest was the way Skwisgaar licked his plush lips and winked lasciviously. Nathan knew he was being manipulated, but it was working anyway. By the time he kicked the door closed behind him he already had his sleeveless t-shirt over his head and onto the floor. “Anyones here ever dones de threesome befores?” Skwisgaar asked with a shit-eating grin. “Noes? Well, pays attentions, school ams in session—”Nathan reached the older man’s bed and shoved him down flat on his back, landing across Toki’s lap. That took care of the leer. He straddled Skwisgaar’s hips and barely had to press down to feel his arousal pushing up beneath the blankets. Toki must have seen it too, because he let out a gasp and followed Nathan’s lead, grabbing for Skwisgaar’s wrists to pin his hands above his head. The younger guitarist looked up at Nathan with an earnest puppy dog look. He really just wanted to fit in and be accepted. Nathan, flushed with pleasure at coming out on top in this situation both literally and figuratively, magnanimously gave him a nod of approval before turning the majority of his attention back to the struggling Swede. “You’re not in charge here, Skwisgaar,” Nathan growled, putting more of his weight on him to prevent any real squirming around. He was starting to regret not taking his jeans off yet — what little movement the trapped guitarist could manage was targeted and stimulating — but there would be time for that soon. Right now he had a point to prove. In fact… He’s the weak link, Nathan realized with a feral, triumphant grin. Skwisgaar, not Toki. Of course! Offdensen had even said it, Toki would probably be among the strongest of all of them once the malnutrition wore off. Murderface was borderline scrawny but the guy bounced back from most things like a rubber ball and always had a knife on him, and Pickles was small but scrappy, and claimed to know twenty-two different ways to kill a man with a broken bottle. But Skwisgaar, his default approach to life was fucking. His libido was legendary, but it was also his weak spot. Anyone who’d ever been within fifty feet of him on the rare occasion a girl took off and left him with blue balls knew that. Making him submit would get him and Toki both to shut up about the whole baby thing, and the other two guys would get bored faster if they were the only ones making the jokes. Teeth still bared, Nathan leaned down and nipped at the pale skin connecting Skwisgaar’s neck and shoulder. He felt Skwisgaar suck in a sharp breath under him and, beneath that, Toki’s legs tensing. The kid was wound so tight that, Nathan realized belatedly, his erection was pretty much right in their faces… Time to see how far this situation could be pushed. Skwisgaar’s eyes widened as Nathan grabbed his chin between one thumb and forefinger. That other time they’d messed around, it hadn’t been anything more than straight-to-business pleasure, and he could tell Skwisgaar was wondering if some sort of kiss was about to happen. It was tempting — just to mess with him, of course, of course, what kind of guy would Nathan be if he admitted to himself that kissing was more than just a means to get ladies to agree to have sex — but no. He turned the blond’s mouth towards Toki and gruffly ordered, “Suck it.” And although Skwisgaar rolled his eyes, his pupils dilated at the command, and he did as he was told. Toki’s head hit the shitty plywood headboard with a thunk. Fuck, Nathan thought as he watched Skwisgaar go to town, rolling into the task with gusto. He really, really wishing he’d taken his jeans off earlier. Last time he hadn’t exactly been in a position to, you know, watch, but he remembered how good those lips had felt.

Nathan scrambled back up onto his knees on the edge of the bed and yanked on his zipper so hard it nearly came off, but holy shit it was a relief. For a moment he got lost in just watching and just palming himself through the front of his tented boxers, but then Toki whimpered. What a baby, Nathan thought, and that reminded him of the increasingly forgettable point of all this. He scrambled off the bed to shuck both his pants and boxers in one go, and sat next to Toki at the head of the bed. Skwisgaar was kind of in the way, but Nathan just threw his legs over the guy and used his bony-ass hip as a leg rest. Then he grabbed the rhythm guitarist’s hand and shoved it towards his cock.

The hand gripped, and Nathan groaned. In this, it seemed, Toki needed little to no instruction, presumably because he’d been practicing this particular activity on himself for longer than he’d known what to call it. No willing to be outdone, a second later Skwisgaar’s hand was there too, taking over any of Nathan’s length that needed attention. The frontman even couldn’t muster any shits to give when Toki’s head thumped down on his shoulder, mouth turning wetly against his skin to muffle the squeaky little sounds that Skwisgaar was wringing out of him, or when Skwisgaar started grinding against the backs of his thighs. It felt too good, too warm, too temporary to bother with second thoughts, and he really hadn’t ever had a threesome before.

Maybe this was something to look into doing more often… With, uh, chicks, of course. Obviously. It didn’t take long after that. Toki came with a choked cry into Nathan’s hair, his grip spasming just right to bring Nathan to the edge but disengaging as he slumped bonelessly in the other direction. Nathan growled and groped blindly until he found a handful of blonde hair and tugged Skwisgaar’s obliging mouth over to finish. He felt immensely pleased with himself for managing to turn an otherwise aggravating day around, with very little resistance or backtalk from the other two men. That was real leadership. Nathan’s last thought before he went over the edge was that if anyone was a big gay baby it was probably Skwisgaar, for being so into sucking cock. And for swallowing both times. And getting off to it into his own hand. Nathan waited a few minutes to get his breath back, then languorously got to his feet. He surveyed the battlefield of tangled sheets, strewn pillows, and sweaty, limp guitarists with a warm glow of dominance and superiority, then left without comments to take a shower. It wasn’t until he was under the hot spray and working some 2-in-1 shampoo into his hair that he realized, none of them had the excuse of alcohol to hide behind. He’d been basically sober — at least, as sober as anyone who’s breakfast had consisted of beer and potato chips could be — and he hadn’t smelled anything particularly strong on Skwisgaar or Toki’s breaths. So what did that mean? Shit, what if it happened again?After a moment of silent contemplation, Nathan shrugged and continued washing. As far as he was concerned, his problem was solved. Everyone would still be able to play for the tour, so Offdensen would be pleased, even though this probably hadn’t been what he’d had in mind when advising Nathan to use strength to his advantage. And however things went from this point, he sure as hell wasn’t going to let it fuck up his band.

#metalocalypse #nathan explosion #charles foster offdensen #skwisgaar skwigelf #toki wartooth #my fanfiction #my fanfic

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iamvegorott · 6 years ago

Text

Silent Date

This is a late birthday present for @rainymae523 ! Happy Birth!

Summary: Wilford finally managed to ask JJ on a date and all goes well except for when JJ is given a braille menu and the waitress starts yelling.

Silent Date

“Should I wear the blue one or the red one? Maybe the green one to match his hair. But then I’d look like Christmas on bleach because of my hair. Would orange stick out too much? I don’t even know what shirt I’m wearing, why am I fussing over bow-ties? What do you think, Dark? Dark? Dark!”

“I’m listening.” Dark mumbled as he typed on his phone, sitting on Wilford’s desk.

“Listening my ass.” Wilford huffed, taking Dark’s phone out of his hands.

“I was using that.” Dark said, holding his hand out.

“I need your help!” Wilford whined, placing the phone back in Dark’s hand. “And you texting Anti isn’t doing that.”

“How do you know that? I could be asking for his opinion.” Dark went back to his typing.

“Anti has literally zero sense of fashion. He thinks he can wear sneakers to a business casual affair. Sneakers? For business casual?” Dark finally lowered his phone.

“You’re going to a casual restaurant.” Dark said in a flat voice.

“With Jamesy!” Wilford corrected. “As a date!”

“You’ve been on dates before, why are you so worried about this one?” Dark asked, phone buzzing in hand as Wilford went over to his closet.

“Because it’s with James.” Wilford pulled out one of his shirts.

“We’ve known him for years, again, why are you so worried?” Dark looked at his new message and chuckled a little.

“Because I’ve been wanting this date for years.” Wilford admitted, throwing the shirt on his bed. He looked at Dark and saw a large smirk and a raised brow on the other man’s face. “Shut up.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You didn’t need to.” Wilford grumbled and went over to his dresser.

“Oh, the lucky red, you really want this date to go well.” Dark teased when Wilford pulled out some underwear.

“Again, shut up.” Wilford tossed the underwear on the bed as well and started going through a different drawer for pants.

“When you get back, you have to dish.” Dark said in a silly voice, laughing a little when Wilford just looked at him. “You did the same thing to me and Anti. I can have some fun too.”

“Well, if I do end up like you and Anti. I’ll be sure not to be texting James instead of paying attention to my friend.” Wilford huffed, going back over to the bed with a pair of slacks.

“I’m paying attention.” Dark protested. “I can tell that you really want this date to go well since you’re wearing your, and I quote, ‘pants that make your ass look like two perfect apples’.”

“They do…” Wilford mumbled.

“Alright. I’ll be the supportive friend.” Dark pocketed his phone and got off of the desk. He went over to Wilford and patted his back. “You’re going to be just fine. Everything is going to be okay and if it doesn’t work out, you two will still be great friends. He already said yes to a date, he obviously doesn’t hate you.”

“Thanks, Dark.” Wilford said with a smile.

“Don’t tell anyone I was nice.” Dark jokingly threatened.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Wilford chuckled.

x~x~x

“Hi, Wilford.” JJ greeted, using Wilford’s sign name by holding up three fingers to make a ‘w’ and tapping it to his chest two times.

“Hey, Jamesy.” Wilford greeted back, resisting the urge to run his hand through his hair, he spent too much time getting it perfect and by him, he meant Dark. “You haven’t been waiting long, have you?” JJ shook his head in response and looped his arm through Wilford’s, chuckling silently when Wilford’s cheeks turned the same shade of pink as his hair.

“Hello, gentlemen, is it just you two?” The woman behind a little podium asked.

“Yep.” Wilford answered while JJ got distracted by a picture on the wall, trying to read all of the phrases on it.

“Table or booth?” The woman asked.

“I don’t care.” Wilford said, giving JJ a light tug on the arm to get his attention.

“Table. Please.” JJ signed.

“Table, please.” Wilford translated, raising a brow when the woman went ‘oh’ and sat one of the menus down to get a different one.

“Right this way.” The woman said before leading Wilford and JJ into the dining area. “Let me know if you need anything, your waitress should be right with you.”

“Thank you.” Wilford said as he and JJ sat down at the table. “So, Dark looked into this place and said that they have amazing bean burgers.” Wilford said, flipping open his menu and JJ did the same. “Is something wrong?” He asked when he noticed the look on JJ’s face.

“Read. Can’t.” JJ said before holding up his menu to show Wilford that it was blank with bumps all over it.

“Is that braille?” Wilford ran his hand over the menu, the texture familiar to the books Host read when he didn’t want to use his narrating. “She must have grabbed the wrong menu.” Wilford said. “You can read off mine” He added and turned his menu around.

“Thank you.” JJ smiled.

“Anyways, they do this really cool thing where you can replace the meat of any burger with a bean patty.” Wilford pointed at the burger section.

“F-R-E-N-C-H S-O-U-P burger?” JJ pointed at the menu as well.

“That actually sounds really good.” Wilford said after reading the description. “I might get it.”

“Same-as-me.” JJ agreed.

“Hello! What can I get you to drink!?” A waitress asked in a loud and slow voice after walking up to the table, looking at JJ as she spoke.

“Excuse me, ma’am, you don’t need to-” Wilford stopped when JJ waved a hand at him. JJ smiled at the waitress and pointed to a picture of the Sprite logo.

“I’ll take a Cherry Coke.” Wilford said, irritation clear in his voice.

“Alright. Are you ready to order or do you need a few minutes?” The waitress asked in a normal tone to Wilford. Wilford looked at JJ and JJ gestured for Wilford to go ahead.

“We’ll each take a French Soup Burger, but can we get his with a bean burger?” Wilford said.

“No problem? Anything else?”

“Nope.” Wilford forced a smile and it went away the moment the waitress was gone. “I should complain to the manager.” He grumbled.

“No. No. Fine.” JJ signed, letting Wilford know that it was okay.

“But-”

“How are you?” JJ asked, cutting Wilford off again. Wilford sighed before smiling and answering JJ’s question.

After dinner, JJ and Wilford were walking out of the restaurant, JJ holding Wilford’s arm again. Wilford saw Anti standing at the end of the parking lot, leaning against a tree and scrolling through his phone. He must be JJ’s ‘ride’ home.

“I still don’t get why the waitress was yelling at you or why they gave you a braille menu.” Wilford huffed when they stopped walking.

“Understand. Talk. Can’t.” JJ shook his head as he signed, saying that they didn’t understand people who couldn’t talk. “She. Thought. I. Deaf.” He explained.

“Even then, you don’t need a braille menu and there was no need to yell. Yelling wouldn’t magically-” Wilford was stopped once again, but this time by JJ grabbing his face and pulling him in for a kiss.

“Thank you.” JJ said. “Fine. Promise.”

“I…” Wilford held out the word, face flushing.

“Kiss him back, you dolt!” Anti shouted. Wilford stiffened for a moment before shooting Anti a quick glare. JJ just raised a brow and smirked, asking if Wilford was actually going to do it. Wilford laughed and cupped JJ’s cheek with a hand, leaning in to press their lips together again. He couldn’t help himself from laughing a little again when he saw that JJ was blushing this time. “If you’re gonna fuck, let me know so I can go home!” Anti shouted again, getting Wilford and JJ to both have flushed faces.

“See you. Later.” JJ said before going over to Anti, slapping at his arm as soon as he reached him. Anti just laughed before glitching the two away. Wilford happily smiled at the spot, snapping out of his daze when his phone started buzzing.

“Hey, Darky!” Wilford greeted after answering the phone, walking further away from the restaurant. “Yep, all went well...If you say ‘dish’ one more time I’m friend breaking-up with you.” Wilford warned with a chuckle, disappearing in a cloud of pink smoke.

Tag List: @readeatfightlove13 @sketchy-scribs-n-doods @blueyeswhitedragon16 @estraevelyn @virge-of-death @superdltpurplerage @xhuxk37 @i-am-not-anon

Let me know if you want to be tagged in anything! ^__^

#dapperstache #some danti

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attract-mode-collective · 6 years ago

Video

youtube

Exactly 79 Photos & Videos Concerning The Game Boy (plus other handhelds)

So... hope you’ve all been following me on Twitter, which is more or less the unofficial new home for Attract Mode. Mostly cuz Tumblr’s days are, alas, numbers, plus I haven’t warmed up to Medium as much as I had hoped to. Though I’ve actually spent the past two months republishing every single post that contains mainline Game Culture Snapshots, so it has remained somewhat useful at least.

Now, for a while there, I had been compiling every single thing tweeted. But because I’m now so damn active on that end… plus I’m busier than ever with other projects… I’m way behind with those digest posts, and the very idea of playing catch up legit gives me anxiety. Yet I have been sharing lots of cool things, which all deserve to be in the blog proper… and because a lot of them are specific to the Game Boy, I figure, why not just focus on that?

Like the above, which is a technique for producing full color photographs via the Game Boy Camera, and yet another thing that I can’t believe hasn’t made the rounds!

Sticking with Game Boy photography, here have a pair of mods that will greatly enhance picture quality. The first involves mounting SLR lens onto a Game Boy Camera (via ekeler.com)...

And the second has one shoving a Game Boy Camera into a SLR itself (via @MaxKriegerVG)...

As someone who was into video games as a kid, and also interested in photography, the Game Boy Camera was the first camera I was able to call my own. Am pretty sure this was the case for others as well?

I also remember seeing this ad in Nickelodeon Magazine (which I would eventually writer for, not too long later) and being absolutely gob smacked (via nintendroid.org)…

Though as much I loved Nintendo brand of FUNtography, I would quickly discover… as did everyone else I also assume… that taking pictures is serious business (via @PolandNintendo)…

Not only did I have a Game Boy Color, but I also had the Game Boy Printer (I still own both, for the record). Unfortunately my snapshots from Link’s Awakening have long since faded, but as with many things, you can find copies online (via gameandgraphics.com)…

Speaking of the world of print, coming soon is a handy guide to Nintendo handy game machine (via miki800.com)…

That one magazine ad featuring Princess Peach catch your eye as well? Well here’s a much better look at it (via suppermariobroth)…

I love handheld gadgets of all kinds, yet some of the popular ones confuse me. Like Hudson’s Shooting Watch; it makes no sense to have a gadget that can detect button presses without a game attached. Guess I’m not alone (via instagram.com/kazzycom)…

A realization I made while sifting through Game Boy related content is how popular the color yellow is with many. Cuz Pokemon? Anyhow, the final post from a blog that specializes in gorgeous photographs of gorgeous hardware, which I just brought up again very recently (via hard-aware)…

How your parents used to trade Pokemans online (via melonjaywalk)…

And no, Game Boys weren't the only things that one could connect to keitais ya know. And yes, Game Boys aren’t the only portables I’ll be showcasing (via anthony10000000)…

I own quite a few VMUs and am always looking to expand my collection… but nothing yellow, sorry. Instead, I want the one covered with dolphins (via anthony10000000)…

So my new favorites artist is Eri Kitamura, and not just cuz she makes pretty looking Game Boys…

She also makes pretty looking girls playing Game Boys (well, this one is technically listening to music)…

Was originally going to post the first thing from Eri that caught my eye, which is a Game Boy with a girl on it, but instead here’s a Game Boy with a girl on it playing a Game Boy…

Time for two more videos from the same individual responsible with the process for producing color photographs at the very top. And it’s what everyone has been waiting… specifically the backlit Game Boy Color mod everyone has been waiting for.

The process is detailed in this two-part video, and here’s the first one (it’s about 50 minutes long cuz spoilers: this shit ain’t easy)…

youtube

And here’s part two, which is ONLY 40-ish minutes long…

youtube

The author of the videos actually has a store, so if the process seems a bit too daunting, you can purchase a pre-modded unit for $250. Actually, this one is $260, cuz of the dual shells. Quite the price tag, yet somehow totally worth it (via instagram.com/esotericmods)…

Now might be a good time to mention how… remember that GBA with the GameCube finish from eBay a few months back? Well, I decided to get the one that resembles a Super Famicom, something I’ve been lusting over for years.

Well, here’s what the aforementioned seller had in his listing…

And this is what I got instead…

Yeah, that green shoulder button is not the right shade. After some complaining, I got the seller to admit that the one in the picture was hand painted; he didn’t know where it get ones that it’s exact color as on a Super Fami controller.

He also had a no refund policy, yet I bitched & moaned enough to warrant an exchange, for another Cube-esque model, one sans the stick. Cuz it’s comparatively boring to look at, here’s a version with the stick…

Again, mine just has the standard d-pad. As for my replacement… the colors of the A & B buttons are not an exact match, once again. But it’s close enough (am mostly just sick of dealing with that guy, aka johnnys_merchandise, whom you should all avoid btw), plus I have started to scour AliExpress for replacements.

BTW, my failure to obtain a modded handheld that channels another form of hardware has me wondering if I should go for something completely different instead (via instagram.com/wakuwakuisland)…

Up in the mountains, flower bloom amongst Game Boys & Game Boy Colors, whereas deep in the forest, you’ll find mushrooms and Game Boy Advances (via pxchinko)…

Some say memories are fuzzy, though for others, they're leafy (via lyosphe)…

I’ve looked all over for tinycartridge's original post, but no luck, so you can all instead have my personal copy of the earthy wallpaper that was shared years ago (and which I still to this very day)...

The Game Boy Micro, DS, and DS Lite are like family, and like siblings, there can the occasional squabble (via benkyo-es)…

@frankcifaldi: When I met this guy in 2003 and he told me he was going to make an extensive fan site about the Supervision, a Taiwanese Game Boy knockoff, I was like "sure dude." 15 years later he actually launched the thing??

Meanwhile, the Game & Watch Perfect Catalogue just came out, with the full low down on all 59 models. BTW, had no idea there were 59 in total until @ionadisco mentioned it…

How Game & Watches were sold in America; I fondly recalls this ad in-between the pages of Amazing/Spectacular/Web of Spider-Man (via suppermariobroth)…

And how Game Boys were sold in Japan, one day one apparently, which would explain this salesperson’s rather perplexed demeanor (via flashbak.com)…

Silly as it sounds, and as silly as he looks, the US version of Firebrand is nonetheless a warm & welcoming face from my childhood (via nintendometro)...

Mario dropping a knowledge bomb (via suppermariobroth)…

Here’s Peach seemingly kicking Toad’s ass in Super Mario Bros Deluxe, which I’ve been meaning to tweet for a while now, but now seems like the right time & place for obvious reasons (via nintendometro)…

A cute comic about someone finally beating a game after ten years, or at least I believe that's the case (you know, language barrier and all; via @desune593)

Sailor Moon seems to enjoy handheld gaming more so than in the arcades (via uglygreenjacket)…

It saddens me that ravages of time is robbing me of my precious memories, including the names of 90s anime, hence why I had to ask on Twitter who exactly is this (answer was Tenchi Muyo; via shxtfased)...

It’s SethEverman, just playing some pokemon blue…

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Speaking of music, it again saddens me that I wasn’t about to make the trip to Japan to catch chiptunes at Square Sounds, and various associated venues. At least @bit_shifter_ took this great snapshot of Glomag at Cyberpunks Osaka…

Meanwhile, here in NYC, we actually still have record stores. And you can grab Josh’s latest release, his first in 12 years(!) at Rough Trade (via bit-shifter)…

Though back to Japan; attended Square Sounds would have also afforded me the chance to check out Tokyo Game Show, where I could have gotten that VMU shaped USB drive that was being sold at the Sega booth (via miki800)…

A few weeks before TGS, there was an earthquake in Japan, in northern island Hokkaido. Many were left without power, but one person was able to keep up with the news, thanks to an old DS peripheral that basically provides bunny ears (via kotaku.com)…

On a semi-related note, here’s someone watching old ECW VHS tapes on their Game Gear (via heavyelectricity)…

Sorry, but the only other thing I have that’s related to Sega’s Master System on the go is this gif from a pizza ranch salad dressing (yikes) commercial, which was cross-promoting Sonic Chaos (via sonicthehedgeblog)...

I have no idea why I'm so amused by this Getty Image of a Neo Geo Pocket that was confiscated at summer camp. Or perhaps no explanation is needed? (via hellomrkearns)…

Speaking of the Great Outdoors, here’s my buddy Steve enjoying some Mario Kart 8 in the middle of a forest (via instagram.com/vitaminsteve)…

And speaking of Mario Kart on the Switch, Bowser seems like a pretty cool dood to have a car trip (via suppermariobroth)…

The Switch is so beloved that people are doing fan art, not for any particular game but the simple the act of playing with it (via annazees)…

Granted, one of the best things about the Switch is all the different ways in which one can play (via kanekoshake)…

If you enjoy your Switch on the go and are looking for a way to store games… and are a diehard Breath of the Wild fan as well… plus if you have access to a 3D printer (via miki800.com)…

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It’s a tribute to Star Wars… games… all of them… featuring Princess Leia focused on her DMG (via deviantart.com/robduenas)...

BTW, do you still have your Game Boy? If not, here ya go (via anthony10000000)…

When the realization hits that your Game Boy Color library is incomplete (via @Bootleg_Stuff)…

Back to my buddy Steve, who visited the Primark at the Staten Island mall and took pics of the game related apparel that, sadly, were no longer in stock by the time I was able to swing by. With the one thing I really wanted being this shirt…

This pair of Super Mario Land X Air Jordans is only $1,350.00 (via miki800.com)…

I’m sure you’ve seen him already, but for the sake of completion, here’s that grandpa from who rigged this bike with 11 phones to become a Pokemon Go master (via bbc.com)…

Yet another sign of our times, literally (via fuckdragonballz)…

This image features a PSP and a MacBook, both of which are from the mid-2000s, yet feels very late 1990s/early 2000s. Why? Those USB cables (via jcgraphix)…

And last but not least, here’s Paris Hilton with her DS in 2005 (via @ParisHilton)…

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wendip-week · 6 years ago

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Wendip Week 2018 Part 4: Date Night

Hey guys, sorry for not posting these here during Wendip week. Let me give you a run-down of the background: I made my Wendip Week in context of the Kamen Rider Weird series I’m writing, which takes place in the future of SuperGroverAway’s universe (with ddp456 influence….yes, I had permission from them both). As a result, the main characters - including Phoebe, their daughter - from my series are co-hosts for this week. I’ll post more of Wendip Week here, but for those of you who want to read the main story, follow me on fanfiction.net or leave a guest review. Now, then, here’s part 4 of Wendip Week 2018:

#############################################################################################################

“You know, Phoebe…” Ken got up and paced the room a bit. “Your mom, well, I’ve noticed something about her.” He was trying as hard as he could to word the next thought carefully.

“Yeah?” Phoebe said, looking up at him with an inquisitive gaze. “Come on, just say how you feel.”

“She’s…not really the mushy romantic type.”

Phoebe relaxed and leaned back. “I mean, yeah, I’ll give you credit there…”

“It honestly feels like Dipper is more into the grand gestures, ya know?”

Phoebe cocked an eyebrow. “You’re reaching a bit there…that’s kinda harsh. Mom’s done romantic stuff.”

“Sure, like burning her hair on a candle when trying to make a romantic dinner?”

“And Dad once got bitten by a bunch of doves trying to set up an anniversary surprise, what’s your point?”

Ken sighed in mock resignation. “Oh, fine. My point was different anyway. I was just going to say that when she DOES go for something, she goes big. I’m just surprised how long it takes sometimes…”

“Wait, are you talking about…” Phoebe groaned in mock frustration. “You just LOVE talking about yourself, huh?”

“Well, sure, but also blame it on the watch.” Ken pointed. “I’ve been getting messages from Castle that if he’s spending a fortnight writing these, he’s getting some worldbuilding out of it.”

“What’s worldbuilding?”

Ken threw up his hands. “I dunno, I just work here….So a week after Dipper’s anniversary surprise - yes, the one we talked about last year - Wendy sprung something on a similar scale: after she got a push…”

###############################################################################################################

Ken woke up in a hammock outside of the Mystery Shack, confused for all the world as to what he was doing there. Then he remembered - after cleaning the bunker of the anniversary party from last night, he had crashed there to avoid having to ride home so exhausted. He went into the kitchen to see Wendy sipping a cup of coffee by herself. “Oh, um, good morning.”

Wendy looked up. “Oh, hey Ken. Slept well?” Her face had a smile, but her eyes seemed…off.

“Yeah, thanks. Um, you got anymore coffee?”

“Sure, man. Help yourself.” Wendy nodded to the kitchen counter, where the pot was still steaming. Ken filled up a mug and wordlessly sat across from the only occupant in the room.

After a moment of silence, Ken decided to start. “So, um… surprised to see you up so early.”

Wendy chuckled a bit. “Well, I’m sure Dipper’s sleeping well mostly because of the planning he had to do the past few weeks. Doofus gets like that sometimes - works on what he considers important tirelessly, then crashes. Ask him about your belt sometime if you don’t believe me.”

“Oh, I believe you.” Ken leaned forward a bit. “But that’s one adult out of all the ones that you somehow beat to the table. I don’t think the problem is with them. I think something’s bothering you.”

Wendy sighed. “Man, this is why I talk to you like and adult and asked that you call us all by first name. You somehow get us too well.”

“Quick study, I guess….so, what’s eating you?”

Wendy leaned back and looked up in the sky. “Want to guess what Dipper and I did for our first anniversary?”

“Wait, so a year after the bunker or…?”

Wendy laughed. “Oh no, sorry. I meant our actual anniversary a year into being married. Sorry, we didn’t start counting from earlier on until, well, later…on.”

Ken shrugged. “It’s fine. But humor me, what did you do?”

“Chinese takeout and a bad movie. I kid you not. And it was MY idea too. After Dipper had tred to do this whole thing with a bunch of doves…”

Ken snorted. “In an apartment. I don’t know what he expected to happen.”

“Well, yeah, he wasn’t exactly his smarter self that day. Point is, though, he always worked to make our anniversaries special. Now I wonder why I never seem to. We have a date night this Saturday, and yet all I can think of is what B-rated movie to watch.” Wendy kicked the corner of the table lightly.

Ken shook his head. “Wendy, if I may…you’re not seeing the big picture here.”

Wendy looked up, a bit of fire in her eyes that suggested the next words had to be carefully chosen. “How so?”

Ken smiled, not being put off at all by the look. “I was part of yesterday’s event quite last minute, and yet I was able to see one thing very clearly. Dipper loves you, he loves everything about you, and he loves every minute he gets to spend with you.”

Wendy calmed down a bit as the truth of his words washed over her. “So what, then? I’ve hit peak? No reason to do anything special for him?”

“Not exactly. I’d say the best thing you can do is keep making good memories with him - whatever that means.” Ken got up. “Want some eggs?” He said, getting some out of the fridge.

Wendy drummed her fingers on the table as Ken got to work with a pan. “You know what, Ken? You’re right…except for one thing…”

Ken turned around. “Which is?”

“He doesn’t love every moment we’ve had together….because some of the ones from our first summer together, I ruined by doing the wrong thing. I do need to keep making new memories, but partly to make some of those right. But one in particular I need your help. Heck,” she smiled. “I could use the entire family on this, but at the very least I need you, Finn, Soos, and the Shack.”

Ken looked at her with confusion. “The Shack?”

Wendy chuckled. “Mabel ever told you of the first big dance party we held here?”

###############################################################################

A few days later, Dipper was returning to his room for some rest when he noticed a note on his pillow. “Wait, what’s this?” With his trademark curiosity, he opened it up to find a very familiar hand:

Hey, Dork,

I know we had plans for Sunday’s date night, but I have another idea - one I don’t want to spoil by looking at you as I give you this:

As Dipper’s eyes lowered down the page, he gasped at what he saw - a black bowtie. He was slightly confused - “Have I ever worn this outside of Northwest events?” In his heart he knew the answer, but…he shook his head as if to dispel those thoughts and kept reading:

Wear this and your normal clothes that day, and don’t cancel the checkup on the manotaur caves - just be back at 7:00. I know you’ll be tempted to try and find out what happens, but don’t get itchy over this - just trust me.

Wendy

Dipper chuckled. “I don’t know what to expect, but something tells me I’ll enjoy and regret it at the same time…”

#####################################################################################

6:59 PM on Sunday…

Finn looked at Ken as the two were in place. “Well, we’re almost on. You ready?”

Ken brandished the sticks in his hands. “Twice in eight days. I should get paid for this.”

Finn grinned. “Well, well, the superhero is getting greedy.”

“Quiet, doods.” Soos said from his position, even as the two could not see him. “He’ll be here soon.”

#############################################################################

After a long day and even a shower in the bunker - years of marriage taught a man to not interrupt the plans of your wife - Dipper stood in front of the door to the Mystery Shack, clutching his bowtie in his hand. Despite his wife’s reassurances in the notes, he had to control every muscle fiber in his body to keep from itching. Instead, he simply tied the black fabric over the orange t-shirt, wishing he had a mirror to make sure it was straight. Of course, he caught himself thinking this way and began chiding himself for that instead.

“Easy there, Dipper…it’s alright…” he muttered as his hand reached for the doorknob. “Wendy had a good reason for doing all this…you’re acting like you’re twelve again…” And with that he opened the door and was taken aback by the scene.

The entire main room of the Shack had been cleared out and replaced with a purple dance floor and strobe lights. Soos played a techno sound off his favorite synthesizer as Dipper walked in, causing the young man to notice that Soos had gone back to wearing the green T-shirt he had as handyman rather than his modern Mystery Host suit. Dipper couldn’t help but say aloud. “OK….maybe I am twelve again.”

Out of the corner came his favorite voice. “Depends. Do I look fifteen again?”

Dipper turned about to see what was probably the least surprising thing that night. There she stood, his Wendy, having gone through all the work of putting this together and yet still wearing her work boots, flannel green, a lumberjack cap, and a black bowtie matching his own…again, like that night.

Seeing her and her plan come to fruition, whatever nervousness Dipper had before coming in was gone, and he found himself grinning as he replied “You kinda do, lumberjack queen.” But then he quickly became overawed again. “You did all this for me?”

Wendy smirked, “Well it was my idea, but come on. We’re kids again, remember? Do you honestly think that I lifted a finger in doing all this?”

“Boom!” Mabel came out shooting a confetti gun with a giant POOF! “You’re not the only one who gets to use family resources for romance, bro-bro. Decorating extraordinaire Mabel, at your service!”

Dipper looked around as the rest of the family gathered - Melody, Ford, Stan, even teenage Gladys and Phoebe all coming close to the dance floor but not stepping on. After all, they all knew this night was about them.

Dipper chuckled. “God, other than the crowd…with you and me dancing, this is almost exactly like how I imagined that night going.”

Wendy grinned mischievously. “Well, one other big exception. Soos isn’t a DJ for all of tonight…he’s just an MC.”

Dipper’s eyebrow twitched in surprise. “Wait, then who - ?”

Soos interrupted by speaking into the mic “Ladies and Gentlemen, your cover band for tonight, please welcome Two Tune Monty!”

With that and some applause from the family, the makeshift curtain behind him dropped to reveal Ken and Finn behind the drums and guitar, ready to rock on. After a quick nod, Ken started drumming out the beat.

Dipper looked at Wendy in mock disgust as he said, “Fall Out Boy’s “Dance Dance”? Really?”

Wendy laughed. “Be honest, dork. It wouldn’t really be us if there wasn’t something either unconventional or straight out of a B-movie. This felt like both.”

“Oh well…Wanna dance?” Dipper graciously held out his hand. Wendy took it with a smile.

Ken: She says she’s no good with words, but I’m worse

Barely stuttered out a joke of a romantic stuck to my tongue

As the two tried couples dancing to a song not meant for it, Dipper turned red upon realizing how true those words had been.

Ken: Weighed down with words too overdramatic

Tonight it’s “it can’t get much worse”, Versus “no one should ever feel like”

“Regretting this yet?” Wendy grinned playfully, thinking of how overdramatic Dipper could be..

“A little…but you gotta try harder than that.” Dipper said.

Finn: I’m two quarters and a heart down

And I don’t want to forget how your voice sounds

These words are all I have so I write them

So you need them just to get by

Dipper suddenly started spinning with Wendy across half the floor, earning quite the whoop from the twin sister watching it all. As Finn finished the verse and entered the guitar riff, Wendy pulled Dipper close and whispered “Got a list?”

Dipper just grinned. “Oh you,” before dipping her down low.

Finn and Ken: Dance, dance

We’re falling apart to halftime

Dance, dance

And these are the lives you love to lead

Finn: Dance, this is the way they’d love

If they knew how misery loved me

Somehow they both knew exactly how to mock falling apart to halftime - by separating and literally almost falling to the floor before grabbing each other for support. They pulled back to each other, nearly bumping heads before letting go and solo dancing next to each other, just enjoying each other’s company.

“This is WAY more fun than if we did this back then.” Dipper said as he grooved.

“Shut up and dance,” Wendy mocked.

“Wrong song,” Dipper just laughed.

As the boys entered the second verse, the overhead lights turned off as strobe lights started their magic.

Ken: You always fold just before you’re found out

Drink up it’s last call last resort

But only the first mistake and

“You getting out of work at the Shack…” Dipper was all too happy to use that as he spun his wife.

Wendy knocked his hat off and pushed his hair back while pulling him close. “You showing me this little gift…”

Finn and Ken: I’m two quarters and a heart down

And I don’t want to forget how your voice sounds

These words are all I have so I write them

So you need them just to get by

Finn: Why don’t you show me a little bit of spine

You’ve been saving for his mattress, love

Dipper suddenly found himself letting go of Wendy and dancing perfectly, his feet moving in ways that he did not seem to control. “What is happening?!”

Wendy laughed. “Just roll with it, I guess.”

Finn and Ken: Dance, dance

We’re falling apart to halftime

Dance, dance

And these are the lives you love to lead

Finn: Dance, this is the way they’d love if they knew how misery loved me

As the guitar did a bit of a solo, Dipper gulped. Wendy smiled. “Even on our date night you’re worried about family. Don’t worry, I gave them a censored version”

Dipper grinned like an idiot. “Wendy, thanks for this. This is the second time this summer you’ve closed a gap in my soul from that first year.”

Wendy joked, “Only two times? Gotta try harder.” before kissing his cheek. “You’re welcome doofus.”

Finn and Ken (skipping a few bars): Dance, dance

We’re falling apart to halftime

Dance, dance

And these are the lives you love to lead

Finn: Dance this is the way they’d love (Ken: way they’d love)

Finn and Ken: Dance this is the way they’d love if they knew how misery loved me

Finn: Dance, dance

Dance, dance

###############################################################################################

“Well, not to boost your ego,” Phoebe chuckled as the story came to a close. “But you two did a nice job.”

“Thanks. Although, it kinda goes to show, I feel like a lot of romantic moments and dates involve family being there when it comes to your clan. Kinda like that whole first anniversary.” Ken remarked, leaning back.

Phoebe shrugged. “Mom in some ways doesn’t love Dad just for himself. She also loves everything about him, including the other people close in his life, like aunt Mabel.”

Ken groaned. “Did you have to word it like that?”

Phoebe shot back. “Would you rather I reveal the verse of the song you and Finn conveniently cut out? Something about mattresses and…”

Ken looked at where he imagined a camera would be and started gesturing with his hand. “Cut the feed, cut the feed!”

#wendip #Date night #Wendy Corduroy #Dipper Pines #fanfic #older!Wendip #older!Dipper #older!Wendy #submission #wendipweek #wendip week #wendy x dipper #dipperxwendy #gravity falls #dipper pines #wendy corduroy

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akiamekosaysstuff · 7 years ago

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Game Grumps Live: Salt Lake City (Review)

My siblings and I got the extraordinary opportunity to see Game Grumps Live! In Salt Lake City on July 15, 2017, at Rockwell @The Complex. We had general admission seating. Here are my thoughts and recommendations!

(Note: This post contains pics but they are bad pics. My apologies. My phone’s focus could not keep up with the frenzy.)

Show Rundown:

They started off with Vernon coming on-stage and greeting the crowd....

...and picking an audience member who is “So good at Super Mario Bros. they could play it with their eyes closed” to...play it with their eyes closed.

(Vernon placing a Sonic hat over the lucky participant’s eyes so he can’t see.)

He then asked the crowd to shout instructions (Mainly “JUMP!”) at the participant at the right times. This made for 10 minutes of amusing intro to hype us up. BUT THEN...VERNON LED US IN THE “HEY I’M GRUMP” INTRO...AND THEN THERE WAS A DEAFENING ROAR…

(The blur here is a perfect representation of the chaos that ensued) ...Arin and Dan EXPLODED ONTO THE STAGE AND THERE WAS NO MERCY FROM THE CROWD.

(Seriously though it’s hard to get good pics when you’re short and the crowd has no chill.) The Game Grumps were on the scene and gave us a hearty hello!

(*Hushed screaming* THERRRE THEY ARRRRRREEEE) The bulk part of the show was an interactive Mario Party 10 game. Arin picked Peach (of course) and Dan picked Yoshi. They then split the crowd into two and had the crowd pick players 3 and 4. 3 picked Waluigi, and 4 (my team) picked Toad.

They had hype chants all prepared for us (“WA-LU-I-GI” *THREE CLAPS* and “GO TOAD”) and told us to hype and cheer as much as possible. They played the game and at each mini game they brought up audience members to play for their respective teams, each time asking their names and asking them for silly hype phrases (Like “What’s your favorite pasta?”) or insults to the other team. There was also dabbing and occasional shenanigans from Dan and Arin. (One of my favorite moments was Dan doing some ridiculous dance/posing at the crowd. Arin asked “What the f*** are you doing, Dan?” and Dan responded with “I”m appealing to the crowd! For Star Points!” XD <3 )

At the conclusion of the game, TEAM TOAD WON!! GO TOAD!!!!! *Deafening roar*

Afterwards they opened it up for questions for about 20 min. (The game went kind of long.) Then they had to bid us goodbye!! Sad!! :(

Thoughts:

I was SUPER hyped to see these guys. Like, really really hyped. It’s still surreal to me that I saw them in person, but at the same time, it’s like “OMG I know these guys.” Mostly, I’m just really glad I got to see them.

The show was fun, but halfway through I realized something: I wasn’t laughing.

Sure, I was cheering and screaming along with everyone else, but I didn’t feel like I was witnessing a live episode of Game Grumps like I had expected. It felt more like a sporting event than a comedy show. It was only really fun if you were one of the people picked to go on stage with the Grumps. Once I realized this I was really disappointed that this was all I had come to see, and hoped in vain that they would play another game afterward. This is more disappointing when you consider how these guys really are very talented performers and improv artists. I paid to go see them and I didn’t get much of that at all. Mostly people just trying to soak in their 3 minutes of fame. (Which admittedly I’d have done too.) I’ve heard that they’ve played Mario Maker at other shows and I really wish they’d have done that instead. I would recommend that if you are ho-hum about going to see them live that you definitely keep this in consideration. (Also, bring earplugs to protect your hearing.)

The Q&A was actually a bit more enjoyable in some aspects, even though I didn’t get a chance to ask a question. I was surprised that the questions asked were pretty quality. (They said at the start, No “Can I get a selfie/hug?” questions, and only one person asked a “Monkey” question, like “Can you say/do X.”) I’ll go over notable questions in a later section. I don’t regret going to see them, but I’m still disappointed I didn’t get exactly what I thought I paid for. (And drove 6 hours and paid for a hotel for.) If you’re a huge fan though, I probably don’t have to tell you that it’s worth it anyway. :)

The Venue:

I will be issuing a complaint with The Complex. We stood in line in 100+ degree weather for over an hour (on top of the hours we’d already spent wandering the outdoor mall) with the comfort that we would soon be in an air conditioned building...except it wasn’t. I had confirmed with The Complex ahead of time that seats would definitely be put out, but I had not at all expected or thought to ask about the air conditioning. It shouldn’t be unreasonable to expect an event venue to be able to cool their crowd, right? I’m not sure if it’s the unexpectedly hot temperatures, the fact that the smoke patio door was open the whole time, or a crowd larger than expected, but it it was sweltering in there and I found myself using my hand fan the entire time, and it wasn’t much help. I do not find this acceptable and I would not consider going to an event there again for this reason. (At least not in the summer, jeez.)

BONUS: Notable Questions and Answers!

Will we ever have an episode of “Dad Grumps”? After a roaring audience chant of “A-VI, A-VI”, Dan said Avi (his dad) has been warming up a little more to the idea of being on the show in some capacity. He doesn’t want to be on camera but he *may* consider doing a podcast interview similar to the interview Dan did with his grandma.

Are the Grumps ever going to finish “A Link Between Worlds?”

They are apparently waiting on a custom controller being built for Dan’s enormous thumbs. They are hoping this will happen, though.

Will there ever be a three-way Game Grumps episode featuring Jontron?

There was a loud roar at this question, mostly “YEEEAH!” BUT there were definitely some audible “Boos.” They have considered it in the past but after...recent events…(Google it if you don’t know)...it’s leaning toward a strong “No.” I got the impression that this wasn’t an outright “No,” but my guess is it’s going to be hard to see how Jon’s reputation erodes or blows over in the next few years.

Has Arin taught Dan how to draw yet? This is a reference to “Super Mario Galaxy: Part 69″ where Dan mentioned how he couldn’t draw and Arin mentioned how he could possibly teach him. They said this has not happened as of yet. The crowd then proceeded to chant “DOODLE DUDES,” and Arin, surprised, said that having Dan on an episode of Doodle Doods could possibly happen, and if it does, we have Salt Lake to thank for it. :)

That’s it for now! Please let me know if you find my review useful, helpful, entertaining, or if you were also there, accurate. :) Thanks!

#game grumps #game grumps live #dan avidan #arin hanson #danny sexbang #jontron #doodle doods #avi #link between worlds #review #show rundown

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amethysia · 7 years ago

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Pretending (pt. 1)

(Hey guys! Had this little fic idea thanks to an RP blog. They were given the prompt of ‘pretend to be this character’s significant other’ and my little brain was like, DOOD THAT’D BE CUTE. So here is this~

BTW, “She” is GOING TO FINALLY END. Work has had me swamped and little energy to do anything besides loaf when I come home. So I’m not posting this as a ‘lol I’m too lazy to finiiiiiish’, I’m posting this because I can’t let a fresh idea rot XD

I also apologize for any grammar and spelling mistakes. Honestly, this was supposed to be a really short ficlet, but that did not happen XD

Enjoy! and Thank you!!!)

He held her close, as they swayed to the music. He breathed her in and felt his heart beat faster than it ever had. He had to tell her. He had to.

The Vishkar corporation had yet another mission for Satya: find out what their competitors were really dealing in. They had gained an internal tip that a rival company may be dealing in weapons smuggling. This very company was also going to hold a gala in honor of the company's new CEO, and Satya was to gather intel and leave before anyone could suspect her of learning the truth. There was just one catch, she had to go in with an escort, due to company relations and the type of work Satya could do. Her superiors tried to find someone suitable, yet anyone who was able to was either already sent out on other business, or they just did not have the time. "We apologize for the inconvenience Miss Vaswani. We are looking for an escort for you to draw off any suspicion. Mr. Corpal wanted to attend himself, however he is in another country at the moment." said the Vishkar superior. "It is alright," Satya said with a small smile, "When is the gala? If you send the date and time, I may be able to gather an escort for myself. That way, no one can suspect the Vishkar organization of any wrong doings and it won't be an inconvenience to anyone in the company." The superior nodded, "I will send you the information. If you do procure an escort of your own, please make sure to inform us. If you still need us to search for one, we will be more than happy to. We can also look into a sister company for someone reputable as well." "Thank you," Satya replied. The call ended with finalized information for the mission. Satya's personal computer glowed with the familiar blue that most of her creations had, making light blinks as she touched and tapped at certain windows. An escort. Satya thought about what that meant. A person who would pose as someone close to her, to draw attention away when she questioned someone or had to sneak into another part of the building. Overwatch had a lot of people who were great candidates to help, however, many of them had recognizable faces or were people who were pronounced deceased. Her mind wrapped around the possibilities. Pose someone off as a relative? This would be a good possibility, however, probably not a good distraction, since no one knew her growing up and many people knew her as a Vishkar prodigy since childhood. Perhaps say they are a business partner? That would possibly draw more suspicion. A friend, significant other, or spouse might be the best possible choice, since it would seem more likely that someone like that would still be learning about her and make up things easier, albeit there could be some stories that could be fudged and would need to be rehearsed. Her choices were slim if it came to this option. She thought of someone she could act with, someone she could be at ease with and they in turn could act and carry conversation. She thought of Tracer, a person who has seen it all and was a wonderful conversationalist. However, Tracer was to be sent out three days prior to the gala on a mission with Mercy and Reinhardt. Which also meant those two were out of the picture as well. Morrison or Ana would be good candidates, but they themselves have had reputations from the early days of Overwatch, and were considered deceased. Winston would be an option, but she also thought of him being too much of a distraction. Few others remained. She approached Zenyatta and Genji, but the two were being sent out on a mission with D. Va and Lucio that very night and wouldn't return till much later. Mcree had asked for personal time off the week of the gala and Hanzo refused point blank. Torbjorn mocked and laughed at her. Bastion wasn't a safe option and neither was Orisa. Pharah had to go to her company to receive repairs on her Raptora. Mei and Zarya had been out of the country working on gathering information on Talon activity and would be returning the day after the gala. That left only two people. These two were unpredictable. They had quite the reputation for themselves and Satya figured it would be out of the question. They just would not be an option. Time flew by and there were only a few days before the gala. Vishkar still could not find anyone available, even from a sister company. Fate was playing a cruel joke on her. She gathered her nerves and decided to ask the only two people left. Junkrat and Roadhog were very unusual fellows. A tall, goliath of a man, quiet and dangerous, and a hunched over wild man, tall, loud, destructive genius and lover of explosives and demolition. Her choices were definitely few. She did not dislike the Junkers, but they were well known for their crimes and that would possibly pose a problem for her mission. Never the less, she had to try. This mission was important to Vishkar and she had to work hard at delivering as she always had. She asked Roadhog first. He was working in the hangar on his motorcycle, giving her his eyeless glare from his mask. She apologized for any inconvenience or any discomfort from her question, for she feared that her very presence disturbed him. He rumbled a surprisingly polite refusal, because he was not fond of large crowds and he wasn't sure what kind of food they would be serving. She thanked him and turned to find the only one left. She wanted very much to sway Hanzo or even Torbjorn, but she knew neither would ever agree. Hanzo's pride was as great as his stubbornness, and Torbjorn, well, he was Torbjorn. Junkrat was in the workshop, covered in soot and brushing away some smoke that wafted in his face. She shook her head as she saw him. He was definitely an odd one. She wasn't afraid of him or dislike him, it was just that she knew he'd outright refuse because he'd have to be around 'suits'. When they first began working together, it was a little rigid and most, if any talking was 'professional'. They did not have many conversations until Winston had them working on projects together. She got along alright with most of everyone in Overwatch, but few really had conversations with her like he did. He would start conversations at random, mostly when he was turning ideas around in his mind and he would ask out loud if a certain math formula made sense. Most of it was very calm and sometimes the conversations were mild, much to her surprise. She found herself reminding him of many things, her attention to the detail somehow helped him remember certain things he had to do for missions or projects. Somehow, her constant planning and stern attitude towards work seemed to help Junkrat focus at times. Torbjorn would comment that her 'nagging' was finally useful for something. She walked into the work room, leaving the door open to ventilate the smoke. The air was definitely rich with the scent of gun powder. She let out a few coughs, which caught Junkrat's attention. "Oi! How's it goin'!" he said, letting out a few coughs of his own. "I am alright. You look as though you are not," she said, remarking the extra soot and look of frustration on his face. "Yeah. Th'damn things not working the way I want it to. Probably time for a break. What're you gonna work on?" he asked as he turned what looked to be a small land mine in his hands. Satya leaned on the desk that she used, not far from his own. Junkrat used his desk as more of a tool box and shelving unit, because he preferred to work on the floor, which also gained him scolding from both Satya and Torbjorn about posture and shared space. Nevertheless, he used the floor. She let out a sigh and looked towards the floor at some screws and bits of metal, "I'm actually in need of something. You see, I've asked practically everyone and it doesn't seem like anyone can assist me. I came to you last because, well, I'm sure you would not be entirely up to it." He sat crossed legged on the floor and straightened up, raising a brow and putting his failed mine in his metal hand. He cleared his throat, "Ah well, I dunno, might be able to." She sighed deeply and pushed herself from her desk and walked over, closer to his working area on the ground. "Well, I have a mission coming up for Vishkar. I have to find out what one of our rival companies is up to. However, I was asked to bring an escort. I need someone to pose as someone who knows me well for a gala. But I know you are not into these sort of things, especially since there are going to be a lot of what you call, 'suits' there." She crossed her arms and continued to stare at the ground, "No one else is able to accompany me and I apologize for bringing this up. I just don't know what to do. Even my supervisor can't seem to find someone. I could do this mission alone, but it is risky if I choose to do so." She looked up to face him and she saw his brows knit in concern. Her own expression softened and just as she was about to tell him 'never mind', he spoke up. "I mean...If it's dangerous for you to go alone, I can see if I ain't busy that arvo. When is it?" Her eyes widened, "It...It's in three days from now. At 7 in the evening at the Grand Hotel in Madrid. It is a formal attire event, but truly, you do not have-" He raised a hand to stop her sentence, "C'mon Symm. We both know I ain't into fancy shindigs like you, but if you need someone to help you, I don't mind goin'. 'Sides, eating rich people food and talking down to them might be a real ripper!" He flashed her a wide grin, his gold teeth gleaming. She let out a deep breath, "Junkrat, I...I truly appreciate this. I will give you and Roadhog a copy of the information and itinerary for this mission. And again, thank you. I will do my best to also make sure that you are comfortable during the gala and we can rehearse some things." She almost felt like she was holding her breath the whole time. She excused herself from the workroom and began preparations for the mission. It would be hard work for the next few days to help Junkrat get into character, but Satya was determined to make sure everything would go perfect, even if she had an imperfect chaperone.

#Junkmetra #Symmrat #fan fiction #sometimes I write #self indulgent drabble #Pretending #fics

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myth0sinwndrlnd · 8 years ago

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my experience with caffeine

~ This is a long post so if you don’t want to read it, I understand. There are some interesting things to hear if you are considering quitting or cutting down on coffee/caffeine here. However, all the things that I have put into this post are from personal experience and should not be taken as a professional or scientific fact. I am merely putting this out there because it’s just an interesting thing I’ve been going through during the past couple of months and I wanted to put it down. Also, there are certain drinks and certain companies mentioned in this post. They do not have a correlation to the situation that I was in. They just happen to be the things that I was drinking/the places I was going during that time. Thank you :3 ~

So, I have been a fan of coffee for a long time. I had started to drink it in high school, but I wasn’t a cup or two every day. It was more like a treat for me whenever we went to the mall or something.

After that, when I got into college, I legit was having two to three cups of coffee a day to keep me up and wake me up in the morning. And while that was all well and good, I found that the more that I would drink, the less it would effect me after a while. This is natural. You drink enough coffee, soon it takes more to wake you up.

Yet, unlike a smart person who would’ve thought to cut back, I just went stronger. This is when Starbucks introduced the Flat White. Which is, essentially, shots of espresso and milk. That’s it. And let me tell you that is what I drank for a long ass time.

At first, I would have maybe two shots of espresso in the drink a day. Yet, after a while, it got to the point where I was having 3-4 shots of espresso a day.

Let me put this into perspective of how bad that is.

If I had 5 shots of espresso in my drink, I would’ve been at my daily limit recommended for caffeine for the day of my age range. And due to my asthma and stimulant use, I would’ve been at risk for adverse effects such as heart palps.

Let that sink in.

5 shots of espresso is all it would’ve taken.

This is also on top of my 40mg of ADHD meds that I’m taking. Yep, that’s right. I was having 4 shots of espresso daily on top of, essentially, a chemical that was a member of the amphetamine class. That’s no good.

Now I was drinking coffee/espresso like this for a long ass time. Like months. And then I realised that I was starting to develop addiction symptoms that weren’t unlike me when I was in college and smoking. I needed a coffee or I would be irritable, angry, and lethargic. And I would just not talk to anyone at my workplace until I got my coffee. I was that bad.

** I would just like to stop here and say that no. I am not equating my coffee “addiction” to someone who is severely addicted to drugs in any capacity. It was not that bad. I was not “jonesin” for the coffee at any point. I am merely finding the similarities between my smoking habits in college to my coffee habits later in life. **

Alright.

So, after I started to see that, I realised that I needed to cut back. Like completely. So, I did the only thing that I knew that I could do.

I stopped.

I stopped ordering Flat Whites. I stopped drinking coffee in general for a long time and I switched to tea. Now, tea has caffeine in it. At least the tea that I drink. But it doesn’t have nearly the large amount that I was drinking regularly at that moment in time.

And I started to feel better.....after the weird symptoms I had.

I legit got the shakes at one point. I got irritable. I was angry and the most tired that I think I’ve ever felt. I even threw up one morning (and subsequently gave myself a panic attack cause I thought I was preggers, but that’s neither here nor there). I got so irritable that on a day that I was working from home I put my cat in the bathroom for about an hour so that I could vacuum in peace. Why did I do this? Cause she was bapping the vacuum while it wasn’t even running (no, don’t worry, I didn’t throw her in there or yell at her. And I did take her out when I realised I wasn’t actually mad at her).

I had experienced these types of symptoms before.....when I quit smoking. (see ** message above)

I was going through a very very very minor version of withdrawal. Withdrawal from caffeine.

That’s when I knew I had to stop.

I was on tea for a long time. I think I had been two months without a cup of coffee save for the few here and there when I went to visit my parents. And even then, I didn’t finish the whole cup.

Now, let’s fast forward to these past three weeks: the three weeks of allergy hell I’ve been living in. I have been tired from allergies. I was being late for work. I needed a push. So, on a whim, I decided to try the new Iced Flat White and other iced espresso beverages that were at Starbucks.

Just one or two a week to get me through allergies right? Wrong.

Holy crap did something super weird happen y’all.

Well, what happened first was poor self control. I actually missed how I was on coffee that I went from one or two a week to one a day again. And, it was close to 4 shots again. Yeah, I know what yer sayin. Way to go, Beck.

But I have chastised myself enough about that.

What is weirder is that after the first week, I started to get very nauseous in the afternoons. Like, bedridden, gagging, dry heaving, sweaty nauseous.

During the first week, it was just once maybe twice.

Yet, the next week, it was every day. Now, I can’t be gettin nauseous every afternoon. I have shit to do. So I decided to test something out and get all scientific.

For the past week, I did a test. I drank my normal tea for two days. And then I drank my 4 shots and coconut milk for the next two days. I did that for about a total of 3 days each (two tea, two coffee, one tea, one coffee).

What I realised is that my body was not too happy on the days that I was drinking coffee. And it was completely fine, albeit a bit more tired in the afternoon, on the days that I would drink tea.

So, after compiling the “data” that I got, I realised something. My body was getting nauseous due to the caffeine. I had “quit” the high dosage for so long, that introducing it back into my system wasn’t like riding a bike. It was like taking an adrenaline shot to the face after sleeping for about 12 hrs (I know not scientifically correct, but that’s how I felt).

After this, I decided. Nah. No more. So, I’m back to tea in the morning and coffee as a treat.

I am going to miss the coffee. I do love espresso and my family are coffee nuts and snobs to the max. But, I think that there is something to be said about cutting back on something in order to benefit yourself as well as maybe taking a moment to appreciate something.

I found that the times that I did drink coffee after cutting back, I would appreciate it more. It wasn’t just coffee. It had different scents and flavours and aromas. Something I didn’t appreciate before when I was using it to just beat the fatigue.

And it has even given me a chance to experiment with more tea. Something I have been wanting to do for ages.

Now, if you made it to this part of the post, wow dood you didn’t have to do that :3. But, it means that you are either curious or you are going through something along this spectrum.

And if you are going to glean anything from this personal experience, let me just leave you with this: Your body knows what the fuck is up better than you do sometimes.

• Listen to it. • Learn the signs. • Do research on dosages and side effects of certain chemicals in foods and how much you should be having for your weight/height/age. • See if you should even be having that much of that chemical/food/drink if you have a preexisting condition or are taking medication (turns out I shouldn’t have been having that much caffeine ever due to being on the ADHD meds I am on) • Don’t think that you can just get over it or muscle through it.

Your body knows how to run itself. Even if you think it doesn’t. Listen to it. It could be telling you something super important.

TL;DR

Was ingesting too much caffeine for a long ass time. I stopped after realising how bad it was for me personally to be doing that. It sucked. Got back on that horse during allergy season. Suffered for it. Now back on only tea and coffee for treats. LISTEN TO YOUR FUCKIN BODY IT KNOWS WHAT’S UP FAM.

#my LONG rambles #story time bitches #quitting caffeine #quitting coffee #coffee #caffeine #personal experience

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whenthatchermeetsbowie-blog · 8 years ago

Photo

MARGARET THATCHER’S TIMELINE

1925 - October 13: Margaret Hilda Roberts is born in Grantham, Lincolnshire

1943: Begins her degree in chemistry at Somerville College, Oxford.

1946- October: Elected as the first female president of the Oxford University Conservative Association.

1951- December 13: Marries divorced entrepreneur Denis Thatcher, becomes Mrs Margaret Thatcher. Her wedding dress is made of royal blue velvet.

1953- August 15: Twins Carol and Mark Thatcher are born.

1958- July 31: Selected as the Conservative candidate for Finchley.

1959- October 8: Elected as MP for Finchley.

1966- March 31: Labour win the general election. Thatcher moves to the shadow Treasury team under Iain Mcleod. Macleod

1967- October 10: Appointed to the Shadow Cabinet as shadow Fuel and Power spokesman.

1968: Votes to decriminalise homosexuality and legalize abortion.

1972- January: Unemployment passes 1 million and British troops kill 13 people in the ‘Bloody Sunday’ riots.

1975- February 11: Thatcher is elected as the Conservative leader on the second ballot and appoints her main contender, Willie Whitelaw, as her deputy. It is during this period that she begins to be influenced by economists such as Friedrich von Hayek and Milton Friedman, whose ideas would ultimately shape her monetary and industrial policies when in power.

1976 – January: In response to a withering attack on the Soviet Union she gave in a speech, the newspaper of the Russian defence ministry dubs her the “Iron Lady”. The name sticks.

1979- May 4: Thatcher becomes the country’s first ever female Prime Minister after winning the general election with a slim majority of 44 seats.

1989- April 1: The deeply unpopular poll tax is introduced in Scotland before the rest of the country.

1990- November 28: Thatcher resigns as prime minister and is replaced by Major.

1992- June 30: Thatcher enters the House of Lords as Baroness Thatcher.

1997: Thatcher backs William Hague who wins the Conservative party leadership. Labour goes on to win in a landslide election.

2012- January 6: Film ‘The Iron Lady’, starring Meryl Streep as Margaret Thatcher is released to mixed reviews.

Margareth Tatcher | The Iron Lady

· British Politician, longest of the 20th century. First woman.

· Responsible for economical en social policy ‘ tatcherism ‘.

· Died of a stroke

· “Thatcher is dood. Nu nog het Thatcherisme, maar dat is nog iets heel anders. Want het door haar staalharde opgedrongen neoliberalisme van deregulering, privatisering, afbouw van sociale voorzieningen en openbare diensten, van desindustrializering heeft niet alleen een materiële erfenis nagelaten, maar ook een maatschappelijke. De neoliberale redenering dat mensen zelf verantwoordelijk zijn voor hun situatie, is diep doorgedrongen ten koste van begrippen als solidariteit en streven naar meer gelijkheid.”

Personality

· Perseverance against all odds

· Aspire for academic brillianc

· Dream big. You only get one life

· Live up to your words

· Don’t get intimidated

· Conservative

· Dominant

Margaret Thatcher Fashion

The Hair : While running for election in 1979, Thatcher's hair had some semblance of life – at times, it even looked as though it moved. That all changed once she reached in power. Post-1979, the hair – like her – stayed fixed in place. Thatcher underwent a subtle, but noticeable, makeover. Gone were the brightly coloured shiftdresses of the late 70s as Thatcher gravitated towards suits. A year before the power-dressing 80s, she predated, and possibly contributed to, that fashion trend. Her hair did too. Swept back from her face, it was like a helmet – held together by several cans of hairspray that, one imagines, could stand the force of one of those famous four-hour snoozes or any fight with Arthur Scargill. A visit onboard the Falklands-bound HMS Hermes, however, proved too much. Pictured in 1982, her hair was, for once, less than helmet-like. This was a one-time-only occurrence. She made sure it didn't happen again.

The Pearl : Few things survived from Thatcher's pre-prime-ministerial wardrobe but pearls were an exception. Photographs from the 50s onwards show her wearing them – necklace and earrings – as the picture-perfect housewife. She even wore them for her wedding day in 1951, and apparently didn't take them off again. Recent pictures showed them still firmly in place, more than 60 years later. They make sense, of course. A twinset and pearls is the epitome of traditionalism – Thatcher may have dispensed with the knitwear (far too domestic, one suspects) but the pearls do their job handsomely. Expensive but not frivolous or decadent like diamonds (far too Elizabeth Taylor), they spoke of reliability. Seen as classic without being blingy, they fit into a look that wants to spell out reliability and no-nonsense conservatism. To put it another way, they're "this lady's not for turning" in a necklace.

The suit : Thatcher's style wasn't subtle – see her colour scheme. The Duchess of Cambridge wore a tennis outfit to watch Wimbledon (geddit?), and Thatcher could be accused of matching her for literalness long ago. For her first day as prime minister, she sartorially demonstrated that the Conservatives were back in the most obvious way; she wore Tory blue from head to toe, with a boxy jacket and matching skirt. A somewhat clumsy symbol, but it was one she liked. She was back in blue recently, meeting David Cameron in a shiny knee-length coatdress for their dinner at the Goring Hotel in 2011. Notably, Thatcher's allegiance to the colour wavered for her resignation speech in 1990. Foreshadowing Labour's dominance under Tony Blair seven years later, and perhaps hinting at her feelings about the events that took her out of office, her suit and lipstick were both blood-red.

The pussybow blouse: If the hair and suit represented the hard side of Thatcher – a woman-of-steel armour in a world of men's suits – her advisers were savvy enough to know there had to be something that played up her femininity. Rarely, if ever, seen in trousers, the skirt suit could only go so far, especially with those shoulderpads. Enter the pussybow blouse, a sloaney staple in the early 80s – Princess Diana was also partial. Printed, possibly polyester and with that rather silly floppy bow at the neck, the idea was to soften her look and even, dare I say, add an element of fashion into a practical, power-centric wardrobe. She certainly thought the pussybow was a fashion statement. While hosting a famous dinner for fashion designers including Zandra Rhodes and Katherine Hamnett at Downing Street in 1983 – when Hamnett used the opportunity, and her T-shirt, to protest against Pershing – Thatcher wore a theatrical velvet number topped by, you guessed it, a pussybow blouse.

The handbag and the pearl : It may just seem like a mere receptacle but fashion knows the handbag is so much more – especially for power players. While Anna Wintour famously never carries one – all the better to demonstrate she is transported by car everywhere she goes – Thatcher's was a different kind of power. Hers gained a life of its own – or certainly a word: "handbagging". Used by her ministers in the 80s to describe a dressing-down by Thatcher, it was prompted by the prime minister's everpresent handbag. Square and black, it hung from her often-gloved arm (in a rather old-fashioned move, Thatcher wore ladylike gloves – even with eveningwear – well into the 80s). It was there for her first day in Downing Street for both her first and third term, on a golf cart with Ronald Reagan and accessorised with a hardhat on visits to building sites. Although what it contained remained a mystery – this was before mobile phones – she certainly got her use out of it. Auctioned by Christie's in 2011, the Asprey style bag she owned for 30 years was sold for £25,000.

IMAGE PERSONALITY

The Iron Lady Friendly Intellectual

Neat Concentrated Open Interested

Efficient Organised Friendly Sensitive

Sharp Feminine Sympathetic Easygoing

Fierce Driven Sincere Reliable

The Economy Boom

In the 1980s, fashion was influenced by the western economic boom. Youth culture stopped hogging the scene as the teenage market lost impetus. The dominant market was getting older and was also financially secure. Demographics changed the face of society. People were living longer and seemed to act younger at the same time. Old industries died, while new technologies developed and boomed.

In Britain Thatcherism promoted privatization and the idea that greed was good was given credence. Temples to modern living, shopping malls sprang up throughout Britain. Western society consumed and consumed.

FASHION

Margaret Thatcher Styles

Pre-Prime Minister Time

Before the Notorious Iron Lady did become the first female Prime Minister of the Great Britain, she was a Master of Science and researcher at BX Plastics and a lawyer before her membership at the Lower House and her time as Minister of Education and Science. This is the time where Margaret Roberts turned to Margaret Thatcher and evolved a style she would keep for the rest of her life. While her clothing was at first comfortable, loose hanging and made of cheaper fabrics and easy on the eye. When Thatcher became Member of the Lower House and later on Minister of Education and Science she felt the need to be representable at all times, with all accessories. The Blue/White striped hat is the only ‘mistake’ she made according to her believes, since it was to joyful and did not represent the heart of the concern which she was obliged to speech about.

Easy Comfortable Superficial Free

Skirts Wool & Cotton Simple Loose

Prime Minister Time

When Thatcher became Prime Minister she was dressed in a navy suit with padded shoulders, wearing a pearl necklace, her husband Dennis Thatcher gave her, having black court shoes on her feet and an Asprey bag which even became synonymous with her conservative but feminine style. Having suits ranging mostly from the shaded of royal blue to navy blue, mostly in combination with pussybow blouses. The Iron Lady’s style is powerful, classic, static and elegant at the same time. By never wearing trousers, but shaping up with the padded shoulders she becomes gracious and emancipated. Her opinion on trousers was that they rob a woman of authority. During the period of being PM of the UK she once said the following about her own clothing style: ‘Never flashy, just appropriate’.

Static Power clothing Emancipation Heavy-Weight Suits Buttons

‘Never flashy, just appropriate’ Representable Ruches Navy Handbag

Conscious Colourful Authority Old-Fashioned Conservative

Post Minister Time

When Thatcher was relieved of her duties as being Prime Minister her style did not change anymore. The pearls would she wear until the very end; ‘…because Dennis gave them to me.’. In a time where people would wear less colour than before, Thatcher did not follow the trend, but kept on wearing the colours that were most true to her.

Timeless Navy Handbagging Elegant Omnipresent Conservative

Margaret King (The stylist)

I first met Margaret Thatcher about six days after she had become Prime Minister. She came into Aquascutum to buy a new coat; she already had one but it was quite old – she was very careful with her clothes. She also wanted a dress, but the one she liked was made in Italy and she insisted that she only wore British. She was very attuned to our country. I rushed into Liberty, bought some silk, and we made her a dress in three days, copying the Italian design. On the Monday morning it was perfect. I sent it up to Downing Street and she left for France on her first foreign visit as PM. In the evening, I saw her on television wearing that dress.

I didn’t do anything else for her – she had her own dressmaker – until 1987, when she was due to go to Russia to meet President Gorbachev. She needed a coat, but I wanted to do more. As our leader, I felt she should look absolutely devastating.

We made up four coats for each day of her visit. I then phoned up the milliner, Philip Somerville, and asked for this great big fox-fur hat, and also found her a statement brooch.

Margaret Thatcher’s arrival was dramatic and the press was glowing. The Americans were mad about her, saying how she truly looked the part of a prime minister. Everyone was very excited. The French, for instance, originally disregarded her and thought she looked rather frumpy. After the Russia trip, however, they were all over her; they couldn’t stop talking about her. The Italians were the same. That was the turning point for her and her style.

Our relationship grew from there. Women need to have an image. On one of my early visits to Downing Street, I persuaded her to put on smoke-coloured stockings and black shoes, close her eyes, put on a coat and hat, and turn around to look in the mirror. She just knew she looked good. Margaret had wonderful posture, too. A person who holds herself well gets away with a lot.

Our Aquascutum factory started to make all of her clothes, but I also worked on her whole image. The press referred to her “bagging” everyone, so

I persuaded her to stop carrying a handbag and start carrying a clutch. The pussycat bow – I got rid of that, too. Women often try to look feminine by putting a bow around their neck, but it can make the neck appear very short. She was also very conscious of saving money so the same items were worn again and again.

Her mother was a dressmaker, so Margaret knew about cloth and finish. She really cared about clothes; she loved it when people like President Reagan admired how she looked. She was very conscious when she sat down not to show a lot of leg – although she was blessed with lovely pins.

I was conscious about her upper half. When women sit, their shirt starts riding up, so I created these pop-in bibs that were attached to the top of each of Margaret’s jackets with press studs. I inserted a little V-cut into each of her suits, and would pop the bib into the suit. It stayed neatly static when she sat or moved around. In the Commons, she would have a plain one, and if she was going out, I’d have one with beads on it to give her a different look.

When she packed for trips abroad, Margaret would take a special book detailing each outfit for each day and occasion. It was all minutely planned; she was very organised. When the trip was anything to do with business, she wore more sober colours. But when she was representing the country abroad, or standing in a photograph with men in black and grey suits, she would wear colour; I particularly remember a deep coral outfit she wore to the Rocky Mountains in 1990. Pink was very good on her. I didn’t want to put her in too much Conservative blue. She was careful to preserve her British image, so she would never have gone to India and worn an adapted sari, for instance.

If Margaret trusted you to do something, that was it – she trusted you. I felt very close to her, and working with her was an amazing chapter in my life.

Movies, Books, Music, Quotes

MOVIES

The Iron Lady (2011)

Tracking down Maggie (1994)

This is England (2006)

DOCUMENTS

Death of Revolutionary (2013)

Fashion as a political tool (2016)

+ multiple short youtube documentaries

POP MUSIC

David Bowie - 87 and cry

QUOTES

In politics, If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman.

— Margaret Thatcher

People don’t think anymore, they feel. One of the great problems of our age, is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings rather than thoughts and ideas.

— Margaret Thatcher

It used to be about trying to do something. Now it’s about trying to be someone.

— Margaret Thatcher

I wouldn’t be worth my salt if i weren’t attracting some controversy and criticism.

-Margaret Thatcher

Three and a half million of us, who can't find fucking work.

And that Thatcher sits there in her f****** ivory tower and sends us on a fucking phoney war!

-This is England movie

A woman leader was revolutionary. A woman leader with Margaret thatcher’s background was unheard of.

- Death of revolutionary document

There were lots of people from middle class that had marvelous taste. She wasn’t one of them. - Mary Warnock reacting to Margaret Thatcher shopping in Marks and Spencer

Working class boys started to earn money, buy suits, cars, drink wine, going on holidays abroad

- this was the age of yuppie (a fashionable young middle-class person with a well-paid job.

"stereotypical 1980s yuppies obsessed with material objects and financial success”)

Death of revolutionary document

Report on the movie “The iron lady”

Comes from a family that owned its own shop. As a child she always worked there.

Here she learned that you have to work hard in life.

Studied at Oxford.

“get up and do something.

Thatcher acts against terrorism.

“it used to be about trying to do something, now its about trying to be someone.

“once life must matter, beside the cooking and the cleaning. Once live must be more then that.

“I will not be a woman that stands silence and beautiful next to her man.”

She had a high voice, therefor she wasn’t taken serious and called a screaming housewife.

When it became clear she was going to run for prime minister her team told her a lot needed to be changed. She had to work on her voice and clothing style, which made her look like a conservative housewife.

Her pearl necklace staid, she called it the ‘twins’, because it was her present from her husband when she had given birth to her twins.

Thatcher strongly supports small business and believes people should take risks and work hard if the want to achieve something.

Its time to put the ‘great’ back in Great Britain.

She describes her ruling/vision as: unity, strength and courage.

When British islands were conquered by the Argentine government, she stood up and fought for her country. After many dead’s Britain recaptured their islands.

“take pride of being British”. Thatcher herself is a proud Brit.

While she ruled people within her party resigned, because they couldn’t work with her any longer.

Highlights of speeches Margaret Thatcher

She ensures that Brits became proud again to be British.

Thatcher had a good relationship with the President of the unite states, Donald Regan. They shared the same visions.

Thatcher provided military bases for Regan when the VS was planning an attack on Kaddafi, while no one else in Europe would.

“there are a lot of weak people within Europe, weak, weak, weak.

Describes herself as: clear, decisive and purposeful.

“you can’t spend what u haven’t earned.

Its not the governments task to create jobs it’s the businesses.

“strong defence, stand up for your country”

she knew like only a shop owner daughter could know how much pride the people would get out off earning their own home

“we offer them a place that they own”

the people themselves must be the owners over property, not the government.

stood up against Soviet Union with Regan.

Margaret introduces the free market economics.

Analyse of Margaret’s speeches

Always wears suits/mantelpakjes(?)

Her pearl necklace is standards and sometimes her neck gets decorated with a bow.

Blow out big hair

Wears shiny jewellery like brooches and earrings.

wears a lot of blue

a few to none hand gestures.

She kind of has a swish (I think because of her teeth)

Voice became lower from the moment she started running for prime minister.

#research

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aion-rsa · 4 years ago

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CBBC’s Broom Cupboard at 35: Memorable Childhood Moments

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

On the afternoon of the 9th of September 1985, UK children were introduced to their new big brother. Phillip Schofield, a vision in a side-parting, a geometric print jumper and a beaming smile, arrived in the Children’s BBC Broom Cupboard to babysit the nation’s kids for an hour and a half every weekday.

Schofield’s job was to ferry us through the post-school slump and drop us off at Neighbours no later than 5.35pm. He let us watch cartoons, wished us happy birthday, praised our felt-tip drawings of Jimbo and the Jet Set, and never once told us off for eating too many packs of salt and vinegar Chipsticks before tea.

After Phillip came Debbie Flint, who was awesome because her earrings didn’t match, and then Andy Crane, who taught us all the words to the Around The World With Willy Fog theme song. Cheery Simon Parkin and slightly naughty Andi Peters—the man who introduced the phrase “oo-er missus” to the school playground—followed.

Those presenters were like family. They did much more than just read aloud from the Radio Times and interview the residents of Ramsay Street. They were the companions of our salad days, back when we lived in blissful ignorance of what salad even was.

To salute CBBC’s thirty-year anniversary, join us as we revisit a few childhood memories from the early days of the Broom Cupboard. Feel free to add your own below…

1. The Jonny Briggs trombone slide

Forget synths. The sound of the mid-eighties was the trombone slide. Specifically, the slide in J.A. Greenwood’s The Acrobat used as the opening theme music to Jonny Briggs.

Jonny Briggs was a sort of trainee Shameless, the story of a working class lad with two big brothers—one nice, one a bully—, a gobby older sister, a best friend called Pam, and a dog named after a jazz mag. Its fifteen minute episodes were comic glimpses into Jonny’s schoolboy scrapes and family life. It was classic Broom Cupboard fodder, and that opening note is all the time machine you need to take you instantly back to sitting cross-legged in front of the TV, eating a Jacob’s Trio (or perhaps even, if your family was posh enough to have a car and a utility room, a KP Choc Dip).

2. Goodbye to our viewers in Northern Ireland

(From 2:55)

If you grew up outside Northern Ireland, and were as stupid a child as I was, you too may have been perplexed by why each day at 5.05pm, CBBC presenters waved goodbye to Northern Irish viewers.

What happened in Northern Ireland at the same time every day that meant kids couldn’t watch Blue Peter, I wondered? Did everyone in Northern Ireland have really early bedtimes? Was that when telly finished for the day there? Perhaps kids weren’t allowed to watch Blue Peter for religious reasons, like the brother and sister in my primary school who were let out of assembly before hymns on Friday? Was it something to do with the Troubles?

Was Blue Peter behind the Troubles?

No. It wasn’t. The real reason for the Northern Irish early exit from CBBC, as it turns out, is a simple one. Northern Ireland showed regional news before The 6 O Clock News and aired Neighbours an hour later than everywhere else.

3. National Willy Fog Day

Following in Phillip Schofield’s tradition of tunefully singing along to the theme songs of Ulysses 31 and Mysterious Cities Of Gold (that starring role in Joseph And The Amazing Technicolour Dream Coat didn’t come out of nowhere), Andy Crane turned the theme to Spanish/Japanese cartoon Around The World With Willy Fog into a Broom Cupboard singalong.

Taking things a step further, Crane and co. named the 28th of April 1988 to be National Willy Fog day. To mark the final episode of the series, the Broom Cupboard transcribed the lyrics to the theme, told viewers to send in a stamped addressed envelope if they wanted a copy, and asked them to wear Willy Fog-themed fancy dress on the day in question. According to this interview with Crane, the viewer response was astounding and necessitated reinforcements to be drafted in to cope with all the mail-outs.

Some former viewers still mark the occasion every April, which is oddly touching. We especially salute the wonderful Fiona, in this ace YouTube video from 2008, for keeping the tradition alive.

4. Downtown

Downtown was a genius segment to rival anything Alan Partridge could dream up. The premise, should you need reminding, was that viewers sent in photographs of themselves and their mates (involving a trip to Boots, a stamp and an envelope in those days) while they were, wait for it, down town.

The pictures would then be shown in a CBBC slide-show, as in the above video courtesy of this tremendous Broom Cupboard website) accompanied by the dulcet tones of Petula Clark’s titular song. There was also an accompanying campaign to get the Clark song to number one, using a three-prong marketing campaign of repeated exposure, felt-tip pen banners, and pleas from Phillip Schofield.

5. A Tribe Of Toffs – John Kettley Is A Weatherman

Technically, this clip is from Children’s BBC summer holiday spin-off, But First This (later known as BFT), but it all began in the Broom Cupboard.

In 1988, Sunderland-based band, A Tribe Of Toffs, sent a cassette tape of their novelty song, John Kettley Is A Weatherman, to Andy Crane. Crane played it to the producer of BFT, who invited the group down to record a video featuring Kettley himself, and the result is above. The song reached Number 21 in the UK singles chart.

According to his official website, John Kettley is still a weather presenter, and appeared on Celebrity Eggheads in 2013.

6. When the Budget moved it to BBC Two

Once a year, you’d switch on Children’s BBC only to find in its place a man you didn’t recognise reading out the price of a pack of cigarettes in the House of Commons. That disappointment was only matched by the relief at realising that you could simply switch channels to BBC Two, and all would be well in the world again.

7. Edd the Duck et al

In the grand genealogy of Broom Cupboard characters, we think we’ve got this just about straight:

Hogan the Monkey begat Gordon the Gopher, and Gordon the Gopher begat Bobby the Banana. To Bobby the Banana two sons were born, Chris the Carrot and Edd the Duck. Edd the Duck begat Wilson the Butler. Wilson the Butler was the father of The Caretaker. The Caretaker begat Ban The Broom, who gave birth to a son. And he named him… scratch that.

The only Broom Cupboard puppets anyone really needs to remember are Gordon the Gopher (whose leather jacket, it’s widely and quite possibly erroneously reported, was custom-made for him by Adam Ant) and Edd the Duck, spreader of mysterious “Quack Circles”, singer of Awesome Dood (which rhymes ballad with mallard), nemesis of Wilson the butler, and star of Duck Tracy, Duck Dares, and a pretty terrible video game.

8. Maggot Moments

Speaking of which, Maggot Moments was a late arrival to CBBC, in the days of Philippa Forrester and Toby Anstis. If it proved one thing though, it was that compass points sorely needed inclusion on early 90s UK school curricula.

9. “Tell that aardvark it’s a wrap!”

Finally, for a child of CBBC, nothing is more likely to do the job of one of Proust’s madeleines than an ident. From BBC Micro continuity slides to Acorn Archimedes animations to the snazzier modern versions collected in the video above, these stings are wee pockets of pure nostalgia.

Happy thirty-fifth birthday, CBBC. You raised a nation.

This article first appeared in September 2015.

The post CBBC’s Broom Cupboard at 35: Memorable Childhood Moments appeared first on Den of Geek.

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