#[feel free to ignore if you want :)]
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I feel like a lot of bsd characters have been ruined for me because of the fanon verison/fandom's portrayal of them. A lot of people project onto them and that's fine, but it gets to the point that the character is unrecognizable and it's annoying.
#its frustrating i wish people would stop watering them down#feel free to ignore if you want#just needed to let my feelings out#all the complexity and nuance thrown out the window whenever i see these characterizations#idk i feel like its cuz im really protective over characterizing correctly but#im just upset so i wanted to make this post#rant#rant on mischaracterization#bsd fandom#rant post#bsd#bungou stray dogs
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I don’t get how someone can call themselves a human being when they’ve used words like “psychotic/psychopath” “bitch” and “crazy ex” to describe me. I know I’m not perfect but re-opening my old wounds really fucking hurts when I was just comforting a friend. But I guess it really shows just how much someone is willing to not admit their wrongs and act like the victim all the time. Like I don’t need you to do this to me when I’m going through hell at the moment - what do you think you've accomplished? A golden medal for shit talking about me? Well done, you are such a low life who tears people down and says that they’ve made themselves happy when they still hold onto ways to tear me down
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Thanks to @kelliealtogether and @iammistressofmyfate for tagging me 😊
rules: list five things you never get tired of writing. it can be tropes, themes, characters, phrases, whatever brings you joy. then tag five people!
A N G S T
Happy endings. What's the point of angst if you don't get a happily ever after?
Pynch. I've started writing a lot of Rovinsky recently and I'm exploring Decladam, but Pynch is like home to me. I always come back to them.
Slow Burn. I love making people slowly fall for each other.
The Lynch Brothers. There's so much to explore within their dynamic and they're all so fun and different to write, separate and together.
Tagging: @singersargentboi @onedayanauthor @avalonjoan @your-void-senpai @jackwolfes
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My heaven (please don't make me go outside please please please)
#oh no sad bloom hours#sensitive#vent art#tw vent#im so sorry but i kinda need to get this out of my system or im going to lose it#i recently (like an hour ago or so) had to go back home from uni on a uber#i had months ago an experience with another one that behaved clearly like a kidnapper#(the car's color was different from the one registered on the app. they said they were with another person)#and ever since im scared of using an uber#i have to mentally prepare for it when i have to use one (too may times for my comfort)#and the one i just went with *didn't tell me their “daughter” was with them*#i had to be on call with my sister the whole ride#i was so scared i wanted to cry#and i did cry when i arrived back to my room#my dad had to pick me up a bit before arriving cuz i was too scared#and im still scared#i fucking hate going outside alone#i always get this weird tunnel vission and i feel on edge and when i get back home i feel#so. tired#i wish i could just live in my little safe space forever#i wish i wasn't so afraid of strangers. of being outside#i just want to enjoy life for fucks sake#tw mention of kidnapping#im sorry for this#feel free to ignore if you want#i just wanted to let it all out real quick
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@historiavn for Dolly
"I'm here to ensure you have safe passage, Ma'am. I was also told that you would have my orders---" Jamie removes her uniform hat and tries to relax her stance a bit.
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based on this post, because at this point i think it's safe to say @unclewaynemunson is actually my muse or something (hi anna i hope this is okay even though it’s, like, way angsty and way too long huh)
🤍 also on ao3
Two days after Starcourt, concussed and beaten, Steve has a seizure.
His ears are still ringing when the doctor gives him a stern glance over the rim of his glasses and pronounces him unfit to drive. No, in fact, he claims Steve poses a real danger to himself and others if he sat behind a wheel again.
Immediately, Dustin and Robin jump to promising that they won't let him do that, and in another life Steve is sure he would be grateful, or at least reasonable about it, but in this one he has a horrible second where the floor falls out from under him and he wishes, for just one second, that his head had been shaken a bit more, just enough to–
It makes him nauseous even thinking that. Everything does, lately. He closes his eyes against the offensive brightness of the hospital room and lets the sound of Dustin's and Robin's voices wash over him as he takes a moment to really take in what the doctor's orders entail.
He can't drive anymore. No more late night drives to watch the street lights pass and lull him into a safer state of mind than his bedroom walls could. No more driving the kids to their DnD sessions, no more taking Robin anywhere at the drop of a hat, no more bickering, no more reign over the music, no more stern glances through the rearview mirror, no more "Shut up, Wheeler, or you're leaving the car."
No more "Thanks, Steve!", no more "I'll bring some of mom's cookies if you drive us to the arcade", no more "You're the best" or "You're a lifesaver" or "I owe you one".
No more place for him in the group, no more use for him, no more...
No more. Nothing. Now he's just Steve, would-be lifesaver, 'has-been babysitter', 'could-have-been somebody until he lost his license to drive because he wasn't quick enough, wasn't good enough, wasn't strong enough'. Just Steve.
He doesn't know how to be that. Who is Steve Harrington without his car, without the one thing he was good for anymore?
The pit in his chest is deep enough, dark enough to pull him in, and for a moment the very thing he is good for is misery.
He waits until a nurse makes everyone leave for the night, and then he cries. It makes his head hurt, pressure building behind his eyes, but he's used to being in more pain than any teenager should be in, so he curls in on himself and hides underneath the blanket.
Here's to hoping the others won't notice just how useless he is now. Not too soon, anyway. He wants another month. A painless month filled with laughter and hugs, and then they're free to leave, to pull back slowly. Calls unanswered, radio channels changed so he won't reach them, sheepish apologies and rain checks, because now Nancy will drive them. Or Jonathan. Hell, maybe Max will take the risk just to avoid him.
---
He gets a week of daily visits in the hospital, the doctors and nurses insisting on keeping him here, a watchful eye on his vitals, scanning his head three times during his stay, insisting he has head trauma of a severely worrying degree.
Nancy picks him up from the hospital and it's awkward, tense, too much left unsaid between them but there's no one else to do it. Steve's hands are shaking, gripping the seatbelt the whole way home – and then his heart falls when he sees his Beemer in the driveway. The glorious, trusty, wonderful, best fucking car anyone could wish for. His baby. His.
He throw up into the brushes when he realises that he won't get to take it on one last ride. Maybe he shouldn't be so attached to a car. Maybe he's being pathetic about it. At least he can explain away the fat tears in his eyes now, and Nancy doesn't press.
The first thing he does when Nancy is gone is calling Robin, and she's excited when she says, "I'll come right over!" and Steve wants to ask, how, but he keeps his mouth shut, biting his lip. It's stupid, but the thought of someone else driving Robin over makes his skin crawl.
"Alright," he says instead, his voice raspy, and he hangs up before she can detect something in his voice.
After that, he goes outside again and runs his hand along his Beemer. It's shining in the sun; he had it cleaned the other week, the full program, every step in the book to celebrate four years since he got her.
"Four years, huh," Steve says, his nail catching on a minor scratch that isn't even visible but might be more familiar to him than even his home. "Damn good four years."
He's talking to his car. God, it's so stupid, it's so stupid, it's so stupid–
Steve's knees give out and he gives in to the desire that's burning under his skin sometimes, the desire to just sit down and ignore the world. Because everything is less real when you're sitting down somewhere you're not meant to be, and the ground is warm, and Steve just wants the world to go. His head is leaning back against the warm metal of the driver's door, and he closes his eyes for a while, his head still spinning, his ears still ringing, everything still awful.
After a while, there’s a shadow followed by a weight settling down between him, a head landing on his shoulder, a hand taking his.
"I'm so sorry, Stevie," Robin says. The lack of dingus makes it more real, somehow. More tragic. More pathetic.
"I'll live." And it feels a bit like a lie.
---
He gets his month. A month filled with barbecues in his backyard, the kids coming by after school to check on him, and Robin has practically moved in. Joyce picks him up on Friday nights for dinner at their house for a change of scenery.
It’s a good month, though Steve feels trapped. Caged. A bird without his wings, a boy without his car. Steve without his one purpose, the one thing he was good for. He has to be picked up because they don’t trust him walking, or they have to come to his place. And soon the worried glances that are thrown his way are too much, caging him further, reminding him of what this is. A pity party — quite literally. No one trusts him anymore, there’s always someone jumping to help him, not caring or listening to his protests.
And he can’t leave, because “What if you have a seizure in your room?”
It makes him want to scream.
Maybe it shows, or maybe everyone’s just fed up with him now that he can’t provide his taxi services anymore, but after summer the Byers dinners stop and the kids pull away.
“Told you that’s all I’m good for,” Steve says with a mean, pained huff as he hangs up the phone. Claudia said Dustin isn’t home, but he could hear the kids in the background. It hurts more than it should.
“What is?” Robin asks from her place on the floor with her back against the wall.
“Nothing.”
She frowns. “Come on, dingus, you can’t start and then—“
“No, I mean it. Nothing. That’s what I’m good for now that I can’t drive them anymore.”
“Bullshit!” she says, and it comes out so harsh that it makes Steve flinch. He swallows. Right. Robin isn’t hear to listen to him whine about how he feels like he has no place in this town, in this group, in this life anymore now that his head is so fucked up he can’t even be trusted to live alone.
That’s why Robin is here, right?
The babysitter becomes the babysitted… or something.
She doesn’t care, not really. She doesn’t listen. She doesn’t ask.
“Steve, they’re kids.”
“Yeah, well. So am I.”
He turns away from her and ignores the tears threatening to fall. The door to his room falls shut and he would love to lock it just to make a point to the world at large, a point that it can’t shut him out if he shuts himself in, but he knows it’s too risky. If he has a seizure, Robin needs to get in.
He can’t even stay in his room alone without supervision anymore. What kind of a fuck-up is he becoming, where does it end? He’s already managed to chase away the kids, even Dustin only checks on him sporadically anymore, and it hurts. He wants to know why, wants to know what he did, how to take it back, how to get them back.
But then he remembers how it all started. Dustin needed a ride and someone to take a beating. Both of which he can’t do anymore without risking life and death of himself and others. He’s a safety hazard. He’s useless. He’s Steve fucking Harrington, which doesn’t mean anything anymore.
---
And then it’s spring, and Chrissy Cunningham is found dead in Eddie Munson’s trailer. The group is back together again, the Party assembled once more. And Steve, for a just one second, hopes that he can get it right this time, that he can do this again. One last time. Because Vecna slash Henry slash One surely is it.
But then they turn on him — even Eddie looks confused, which is a rather adorable look on him — the moment Steve tries to get a word in.
“You’re not coming with us, Steve.” That’s Dustin, and Steve just rolls his eyes, but then Robin joins in.
“Yeah, no, I’m with the gremlin on this, dingus.”
“Hey!”
“Oh shut it, Henderson.” She turns to him, her eyes softer but no less burning another hole inside Steve. “We can’t risk it, Steve.”
“Risk what?” It’s a challenge. His shoulders squared, his jaw clenched, he’s challenging her, and it’s cruel.
She holds his eyes, her expression icy, like he’s stupid. “We can’t risk you dying. We can’t risk you getting a seizure mid-fight or just by being in the Upside Down.”
“Hey, woah,” Eddie tries to get a word in, but Steve won’t hear him as the desperation, the loneliness, the feeling of being caged like a bird and still the only human left on a desolate planet, all that breaks free.
“We all know that dying in a fight is the only thing I’m good for anyway.”
The silence among their war council, as Max dubbed it, is deafening.
“What?” Lucas sounds small when he asks that, and Steve closes his eyes. He hadn’t meant for him to hear that. Any of them, actually. They weren’t supposed to know.
“Steve, that’s not true.” Dustin’s words are filled with disbelief and worry, and Steve hates the worry, it makes his skin crawl, it makes his heart race, it makes his fists clenched and it makes him want to scream again.
“What else then, huh?” he asks weakly. “What else is there? None of you even talk to me anymore since Starcourt. Since summer.”
“Because you were pulling away,” Nancy explains, though her words are weak and her mouth clicks shut when Steve looks at her.
“Because we’re scared.” Max this time, and Steve doesn’t want to look at her, doesn’t want to tell a child that she’s not allowed to be scared for him— not more than he is, anyway. It doesn’t make sense for him to be hurt. They don’t want him to die. That’s a good thing, right? They didn’t want to see him hurt, so they looked away. It makes sense.
But it also hurts.
Steve shakes his head and pinches the bridge of his nose before all but running from the trailer. He doesn’t make it far (“Stay close so we won’t have to worry”), just needs some fresh air and to sit down somewhere the world will become a bit less real again.
The stairs it is. He tries to breathe through the lump in his throat, clenching and unclenching his hands to get rid of the anger and the hurt and all that excess energy.
He doesn’t want to die, is the thing. The very thought makes him nauseous and panicky. He wants his life back. His car. The freedom to just jump in there and get away. He doesn’t want the cage or the worry or the hovering or the loneliness when he isolates himself from all that.
Face buried in his hands, Steve almost misses it when someone comes to sit beside him. The thick smell of leather and cigarettes tells him who it is without looking up.
Eddie doesn’t speak for a while, just sits with him as Steve calms down.
And then, after a while, he lights a cigarette and asks, “You get seizures, Harrington?”
Steve nods. “Sometimes.”
Eddie hums. “That sucks.”
He nods again, and then that’s that. But even though it was a rhetorical question and Eddie didn’t even need an answer, it feels pathetically good to be asked about something. About himself. It only makes the pit inside his chest deeper, cutting into his soul with a sharp edge, this tiny little moment of normalcy. He wants to cling to it. He wants to talk to Eddie. God, he hasn’t really talked to anyone in so long.
“Before Starcourt — remember, the mall? The fire? Yeah that was, uhm. More monster shit. And Russians who thought I was a spy and then… yeah. Anyway. Uh. We used to be friends, I think. The kids and I. They used to care — or I like to think that they did. And then I got one too many head injuries, and the seizures started, and then they… It became too much. For them, for me. And the caring stopped. And, like, it’s fine or whatever, but I still care, and I can’t let them do all that alone. I know that all I was good for was taking them somewhere with my car, but I can’t drive anymore, so now I’m just… I’m just Steve. No titles attached, no use or function or point.”
Eddie just stares at him, puzzled and intrigued and even a little sad, and Steve wants to laugh it off when the silence stretches.
“Sorry, that’s kind of a sob story, you—“
“Wait here,” Eddie says, stubbing out his cigarette before disappearing back into the trailer. Steve watches him with a confused frown but stays put. A minute later, the door flies open and a scandalised looking Max appears, followed by the rest of the crew.
“You what?!”
“Uh,” Steve blinks. “I what?”
“Eddie told us you think you’re useless and that we don’t like you and that all you were ever good for is driving us from A to B with, like, no personal value whatsoever,” Dustin fills in, sounding no less bewildered. “Is that true, Steve?”
And God, the kid is so good at making all his questions sound like dares that Steve instinctively wants to swallow and negate it, tell them that Eddie misheard, that he’s fine, that everything fine.
But then Robin’s whispered little, “Steve” stops him from doing that. In fact, the sadness and confusion on their faces makes the dams break once more, confronted with months of spiralling and no one to drag him out, no one to listen.
Tears spring to his eyes and he gets up from the stairs to properly face them. He shrugs. It’s as much of a confirmation as anything.
And then Dustin sprints forward and tackle-hugs him, burying his face in Steve’s chest with no intention to let go anytime soon.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles into Steve’s shirt and Steve runs a hand through his hair immediately.
“It’s okay, Dustin.”
“No! It’s fucking not okay, Steve, stop saying that. You’re my big brother, you’re my best friend, you’re my hero! You’re the coolest guy I know and nothing’s gonna change that, okay?”
“Then why’d you leave?” His voice is so small, but Dustin only hugs him tighter.
“Because you were hurting and I was… I feel like all of that is my fault.”
“Why would it be your fault, Dustin?”
He shrugs, and it breaks Steve’s heart. Dustin thinks everything is his fault just like Steve thinks it’s his.
“It’s me who got you into the thing with the Russians. I insisted. And you were tortured for it, Steve! You… You told us to go, and we did, and then we came back and you were— you-“
���Hey,” Steve whispers, curling himself around and over Dustin. “Hey, no, it’s okay. It’s not your fault. None of that.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
“I’m sorry I pulled away, Steve,” Dustin sniffles and looks up at him. “I swear it’s not because I think you’re useless. It’s just… I’m so scared.”
And it makes sense, somehow. The anger leaves Steve when he whispers, “Me too. And I don’t like it when you’re all scared and worried. I hate it.”
“I know. Sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Shut up.”
And then they’re both laughing with tears in their eyes. Lucas and Max join them with their own promises that Steve isn’t worthless to them.
“Did you read my letter? You know, the one if…”
“No,” Steve says. “You told me not to.”
“Right. Anyway, read it. Whatever happens, I want you to read it. Because you’re my brother and you mean too much for me to, like, never let you know. But, uh. Billy died. And I hated him, but it fucked me up. And then you almost died, and then you almost died again; and then you just… collapsed. And I thought, I cant do this again, not with someone I actually like. Not with you. And I didn’t wanna watch. I watched Billy. I… I can’t watch you die, Steve.”
She’s crying by the end of it, and Steve pulls her against his chest. Shit, he hadn’t meant to make anyone cry like that.
“It’s okay, Max, I get it.”
“Not okay,” she shakes her head again. “I know it’s not. But—“
“I know.” He’s stroking through her hair. “I know.”
“Uh, guys? I hate to break up the heartfelt confession time,” Eddie chimes in. “But I think our window is closing.”
Right. The end of the world.
With one last squeeze to Max’s shoulders, he lets her go and they gather their things. Discussions about Steve’s joining their mission have been put on hold while their window is still open. They can continue this later.
Nancy drives while Max holds Steve’s hand in the back. They don’t talk and she has her headphones on, letting Kate Bush work her magic, but it’s fine. It feels a bit like healing.
He catches Eddie’s eyes on the other side and holds them for a while. Eddie smiles before looking away, and Steve does the same.
---
In the end, Steve doesn't climb the rope with them. He stays behind in Eddie's trailer even though every fibre of his being screams at him to join. But Nancy has a point when she explains to him that she and Robin got this. It's the first time he stays behind, and he hopes it will be the last.
They hug him before leaving, all of them. Promises are made to talk about this later, after, and he nods.
"Go save the world for me," he tells Robin, holding her tight, unwilling to let go.
"Only for you," she promises, and kisses his cheek before pulling away. "You better be right here when we come back."
He shrugs and gives her an encouraging smile. "I've got nowhere else to be, Buckley. Now go." The last words are whispered and it feels like goodbye. Steve should join them, he should be there! But his head is pulsing and he knows that one wrong move could leave him half blind with a migraine, and they don't need one more handicap.
The one thing he can do, though, is helping them climb the rope, and it makes him feel ridiculously proud, seeing them land safely on the other side, smiling up (or down?) at him. Robin and Nancy wave one last time before heading off.
That leaves him alone with Eddie and Dustin. The latter is already climbing the rope, itching to finally do something, preparing the trailer for their plan.
Only Eddie is left, and Steve looks over at him.
"Will you be okay, Steve?"
"Sure."
Eddie sighs and looks up at the gate, disbelief and resignation and even a hint of fascination in his eyes.
"It should be you," he says, and Steve frowns, confused. "You're the hero here."
"No," Steve huffs, smiling at the metalhead. "No, I'm no hero. The real heroes are already up there, and in California. The real hero died after Starcourt. I'm just the driver who lost his license, the boy with the bat. The protector who needs to be protected."
Eddie looks at him again, that kind of intense stare, the one that shows Steve that Eddie sees something in him. He wonders what it is, but isn't sure he wants to know.
"I think you're wrong, Steve." He says it with such gentle conviction that it takes Steve's breath away for a second, and something passes between them as they hold each other's eyes.
Eddie opens his mouth to say something, but then–
"Eddie!" Dustin is calling for him from the other side, and the boys snap out of their daze.
Steve steps into Eddie's personal space and pulls him to his chest. "Make him pay," he says. "But stay safe. Come back, okay? First sign of danger, you abort mission. Come back, Eddie. I'll be right here."
"Yeah," Eddie rasps, and he squeezes Steve once more. "Catch me when I fall through that gate in two hours?"
Steve laughs, a sad little thing, and he pushes Eddie away from him, hands steady on his shoulders. "Sure, big boy."
"Hey, that's my part."
"Say it when you come back, then."
This thing passes between them again, and then Eddie goes to climb the rope. Steve's hands find their way to his hips, steadying him, but Eddie is strong enough to pull himself up without problem. Huh.
"In the meantime, wrap your head around the fact that you're the one I'm coming back for, pretty boy."
And then Eddie is gone. Steve watches as he falls through the gate, landing on the mattress with more elegance this time, and then he, too, grins down (or up?) at Steve.
He gives a little wave, and then he is alone.
Plenty of room to think when your friends have gone on a suicide mission and you're the one who has to stay behind. The one who will have to do the explaining when things go south. The one who will have to watch and listen, helpless.
It makes him regret the past few months, the self isolation, all the times he pulled back, all the times he didn't push for an explanation or a conversation, all the times he hadn't asked the kids if they're alright because he was too caught up in all the ways that he wasn't.
God, he wants them to be okay. He wants to talk about this, wants them to tell him he's more than the driver without a license, more than the protector who needs protecting. He wants Eddie to come back and explain what he meant, say what he wanted to say. He wants...
He wants his old life back. But more than that, he wants them in his new life just as much. He wants to be brave enough for this new life and find a new purpose. Create one if he can't find it.
But he can't do it alone. He refuses to do it alone even one day more.
"Come back to me," he whispers, looking up at the gate from where he's sitting on the floor, back against the wall. "Come on guys, you've got this. Please work. Please, make the plan work."
And then, miraculously, it does. Eddie falls into his arms with an undignified squeal and the rest of the Party soon follow. They're unscathed, miraculously, and Steve cries as he holds them, all of them, in a group hug that makes the trailer smell like relief and grief and a new life ahead of them. Slowly, with an unnatural sound, the gate above them closes, and then silence reigns.
They cling to him now. Refuse to let go. Good thing he has nowhere to go as Lucas gasps and sobs into his chest, explaining what happened, that Jason almost destroyed the walkman, that Max could have died. And Steve runs shaky hands through his hair, pulling in Max, too, so the three of them can just hold each other for a second.
Dustin and Eddie are hugging beside them, and Nancy and Robin hold hands, a different kind of horror in their eyes, but they smile wetly at Steve as their eyes meet.
It's over. It's done.
They did it. They really did it.
Steve closes his eyes and holds Lucas and Max tighter. They don't complain.
---
Three days later, Steve's house is brimming with life again like it hasn't in months. Turns out, Hopper survived, and he hugged Steve for a whole five minutes, telling him he did good, he did great, he's a hero. Again with that shit that Steve doesn't believe, but he doesn't have the heart to tell Hop, so he just buries deeper into their embrace.
"It's good you're alive," he tells him, and the Chief sobs out a laugh.
"You too, kid. This town would be lost without you."
"Yeah, right," Steve laughs back, and then that is that.
Except, it isn't, because when he returns to the living room with Hop, Joyce and El in tow, everyone's standing, looking at him with timid expressions. Robin and Eddie are holding hands this time, and so are all the kids. They all look like they have something to say, and the only thing missing is a large banner that says INTERVENTION.
"Uh, what's going on?"
Dustin is the first to clear his throat, but only after Erica kicks him. "We wanted to apologise. For leaving you when you needed us the most."
Oh. Steve's shaking his head, placating words already on the tip of his tongue, ready to explain to them how that's not their fault, how that was all him, he could have said something, he could have asked, he could have–
"Steve," Nancy says, effectively cutting off any protest he could have voiced. "Just listen, okay? Don't say anything."
He looks at Joyce, who nods, and Hopper who looks about as lost as he feels.
Dustin continues then. "You deserved better, Steve, you really, really did. We all did, I think, but you... You put yourself in harm's way from the get-go."
"Yeah, you came to protect me when you didn't even like me." Jonathan this time. "No thoughts, just protection. I owe my life to you. Every single one in this room does, y'know."
"And what you got for it is severe head trauma and... us abandoning you." Nancy.
"You're not just the driver, Steve. You never were just a driver to us." Hell, even Mike is in on this? "You're annoying, you suck, and you don't even try not to act like you're everyone's big brother."
"You're family, Steve." Oh, baby Byers. That's what gets his eyes stinging and his lip trembling, so he bites down on it so they won't have to see. It's futile with the way they're smiling.
"Yeah. You're so much more than our babysitter," Lucas explains. "You're the best basketball coach."
"You actually listen to my music and read comics with me," Max continues with a smile. "You suck just a little less than everyone else in this town."
"Hey!"
"No, she has a point."
Steve's not keeping up with the who's who anymore, he's trying too hard to keep it together.
"You teach me new words," El says, smiling. "You give me your clothes, you take me shopping, you teach me how to deal with meanies."
And the list goes on. Everyone has something to say to him, something beyond the ways he can be useful. Something that he is to them, something meaningful, something that sounds a lot like purpose and family.
"And we were so scared, because you were hurt. Because of us. You were protecting us, and look where it got you. You're a hero, Steve. As real as they get, you are one."
"More than Wonder Woman," Max agrees. "More than Superman. You're Steve! And that's... He’s our hero."
"He’s our brother," Dustin says.
"He’s my son," Joyce adds, taking his hand.
"He’s our friend," Erica, Mike and El say in unison.
“He’s the one we stay for.” Robin’s eyes shine as she smiles.
“And the one we come back for.” Eddie’s smile is gentle, confident, and captivating. Steve can’t look away, even through his own tears.
---
In the following months, Robin gets her license and Eddie develops a sixth sense for whenever Steve needs to just sit in a car and ride around town, watching the street lamps pass and letting them lull him to sleep. There’s an upside to being a passenger, he finds, because he falls asleep like this a few times, always waking when Eddie kills the engine. He drives for hours sometimes, admitting with a blush high on his cheeks that he didn’t want to wake Steve.
Somewhere on the highway to Indianapolis, between three and four in the morning, Steve looks at Eddie in the soft glow of the night, and finds that he’s fallen in love.
And in the weeks and months and years that follow, he realises that that’s something new he’s good at.
#stranger things#steve & the party#steddie#steddie fic#but also not really. steddie is just something that happens along the way#this was meant to be short but uh. uh. whoops?#hi anna i am sorry feel free to ignore this i could have made this easier in everyone but they’re teenagers with trauma dammit#dio words#actually i just wanted an excuse to make steve sad. if you know me you know
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I didn’t know which of Cassie’s hair lengths is preferred by the fandom so I drew her long hair because I never draw long hair.
Speaking of hair, I absolutely adore the way Bart’s hair turned out.
#fanart#digital art#we are going to ignore that Conner is the only one in costume#I need to wake up in 3 hours#tim drake fanart#tim drake#conner kent#conner kent fanart#bart allen#cassie sandsmark#kon el#Tim turned out more sickly than intended#if I messed anything up or you want to criticize feel free to#this is my second attempt at uploading this drawing
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#sleep token#vessel#vessel sleep token#iii sleep token#vessel iii#song: nazareth#very likely this has been posted before so feel free to ignore it or point me towards a different post but i just. wanted it on my blog#am unsure where or when this took place if anyone has any more specific info i'll update it#the source is the tweet where i found it#i. very simply. have not been able to get this out of my head since i saw it and got tired of hunting so. here you guys go#they're just so cute#i have a bonus gif i'll add in a reblog i didn't want it to take up the whole post#the good news is searching for the the source ritual is what lead me to that video of them playing nazareth at ulu back in 2017#so that was a fun find#gif me baby one more time
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THE EX-MORNING
#the ex morning#the ex-morning#kristsingto#gmmtv 2024#krist perawat#singto prachaya#naomivents#uservix#josistag#usersasa#userbon#userdragonz#userrlaura#userpharawee#userrain#userbunn#userzhaozi#< feel free to ignore if it isn't for you#theexmorningedit#I WANT KRIST CHAR SO BAD#gifs#kiss
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Okay okay. Some are saying that iwtv is not about being in love with the monster, but the horror of the monster being in love with you, which I think it's too simple since it's more about 'the monster loves me, but what if I am a monster too? What if the monster is actually a mirror of everything I don't love about myself and the beauty of learning to love all this monstrous things about me, in you?'
#some people just want to point out the villain without realizing they are all capable of being it#you really want Louis to get therapy and a nice boyfriend? wrong fucking show buddy#also haters are the weakest link of this fandom what do you mean you hate this character cause they're evil? disregard#they're all great and you are wrong#ofc feel free to ignore a girl's 5am thoughts it's not that deep#i get very riled up by stupid takes and have to write cause it's free therapy for me#interview with the vampire#amc iwtv#louis de pointe du lac#lestat de lioncourt#claudia iwtv#armand iwtv#daniel molloy
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My childhood friend said that my Odysseus looks like a mix of Chappell Roan and Griffith from Berserk and that thought is killing me. It's too correct.
(Lovely doodle of my boy courtesy of the wonderful fellow trashcat @thehelplessmortals :3 )
#Chappell Roan comparison makes me so happy. like yeah. My Odysseus is very much “Pining lesbian coded” after he meets#Penelope in my writing (Not me projecting. shut UP! ALSO THEY'RE DEMI)#like I definitely can hear him being like “WHAT'S IT TAKE TO GET YOUR NUMBER? WHAT'S IT TAKE TO BRING YOU HOME?” from 'Hot to Go'#like the lovesick fool he is to a confused and overwhelmed Penelope#BUT GRIFFITH? IT'S TRUE AND I HATE IT. I WANNA KICK HIM DOWN THE STAIRS.#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#my headcanons#Dootzverse#(feel free to ignore Tal <3 I just wanted to make sure you're credited and I wanted to share my “pain” from this revelation lol)#odysseus#<-I need to curse people with this as well#Mad character design
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plant study, 240527 🌿 reference photo by jcdilorenzo
#digital art#artists on tumblr#digital illustration#plants#myart#userfairy#analook#madstual#alitracks#usersa#majatual#eritual#oh btw the watermark is for my twitter i just didn't feel like editing it to match this @ too#& please click for better quality tumblr absolutely ruined this#also i decided to tag a couple friends just because i think you guys might enjoy this piece 💘 feel free to ignore me if you want lmao#channeling my inner hyunjin with this one.......
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psd pack #1 by perotovar
i saw @heroeddiemunson show the difference between their gifs edited vs unedited and it made me wanna do the same! i have a few psds that i cycle through depending on the scene and figured i'd share them with anyone that was interested!
if enough people are interested, i might do a second batch of some fancier/more experimental coloring 👀
they're pretty basic for this first batch, but they can be decently customized for a lot of things. i obviously can't make a universal psd but i can certainly try to cover the basics lol
psd links under the cut! please like or reblog if you use!
you can have all of them in a pack -> here <-
or individually:
base
blue scenes (there's 3 versions within the psd)
foggy scenes
dark scenes
yellow scenes
day scenes
ezra
#pscentral#completeresources#psd#photoshop#coloring#psds#resources#pedropascaledit#ppascaledit#pedro pascal#usermaguire#useriselin#userallisyn#xuserannie#userallii#userfanni#userkam#idk if y'all want to be tagged in this kind of thing#but i figure it's at least useful? lol#feel free to ignore this if you want!#oaks#psd*
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Finished veilguard and have many thoughts but none of my friends are done yet. I will probably do a second playthrough at some point just to do emmrich’s romance, but man…. Very torn on the game.
#spoilers for Lucanis romance ignore this is you want to romance him blindly#last chance!! okay spoilers: I understand why ppl were saying they were disappointed in his romance#to say it’s a slow burn is just flat out a lie. they backloaded the hell out of his romance and it’s a tragedy bc he coulda been great-#-despite the cringiness of some of his story and dialogue. ESP when in his banter he mentions rook is his only relationship he’s#-ever had. despite how strong he comes on in his first quest….. like dude come on. explore Lucanis attempting to be flirtatious and failing#it could’ve been so much cuter and awkward#instead I literally got whiplash when he mentioned being in a relationship with rook in banter bc *I* hardly remembered we were#like it’s so weird#I really dislike it#personal#dav spoilers#anyway any moots who finished feel free to dm me
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#there's so many more but feel free to let me know any others you like!#personally I love william so much like what a down to earth guy he's always so cheery and fascinated by plants like arthur#his sweet nature and the way he interacts with arthur- god I could cry#and he always remembers arthurs name 😭#“well I'm ignorant ugly and nasty”#“well lets see if we can do something about that :)”#god I love u william you're so lovely#the way they get so casual and friendly the more you complete his requests too :')#he wants to help arthur#gahh#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#mick squeaks#arthur morgan#william rdr2#blind man cassidy rdr2#moonshiners rdr2#hamish sinclair rdr2#marko dragic rdr2#albert mason rdr2#algernon wasp rdr2#francis sinclair rdr2#margaret rdr2#charles chatenay rdr2#mr black rdr2#mr white rdr2#charlotte balfour rdr2#whew#tumblr polls#polls
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Please reblog for a larger sample size, or don’t if you don’t want to, whatever
#on the one hand ‘Gotham’s wicked little sister’ clearly communicates Newark to me if Gotham is NYC#but on the other I’m having trouble thinking of a city with a more famously corrupt police force than Baltimore#+ ‘BPD’ is pretty on the nose#Atlantic City is also plausible if you want to keep it NJ#Chicago & Detroit are cities Nightwing has worked out of in continuities where Blüd doesn’t exist#and I included Bakersfield purely as a knock against Bakersfield. feel free to ignore.#bludhaven#Nightwing#Batman#poll
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