#[eeee first thing he's actually going to blow up!]

[nokingsonlyfooles]

The Dark Secret of Kung Fu Panda, Part 2...

...if you're coming from a place of Western tropes and values, you need to read Shifu as a shitty teacher, or the story doesn't scan.

Oh, and also a shitty parent, a shitty student of kung fu, and a shitty student of Buddhism.

(Sorry, little dude.)

I've already unpacked the teacher part, but all these things are a result of trying to write a story set in China, that both Chinese and Western audiences will understand. They did very well! But there's always a few folks who aren't able to keep up with a complex read like this - and they don't go, "Oh well, this story wasn't for me," they get mad at the characters and the writers.

So! Let's talk more about kung fu, Buddhism, child development, tropes and subversions - and whether that shiny piece of paper Tai Lung was after actually meant something or was just an elaborate troll.

I like to go to TVTropes and read the Headscratchers. For a storyteller like me, it's like playing Narrative Minesweeper. Let's see, did anyone have trouble with this plot point? (click) Ah, not too bad. What about this one? (click)

(Check that link! This is the page for Kung Fu Panda 2! People are really upset about this!)

KABOOM! Oh, man. Okay. Let's plant a flag in that and try to figure out why it blew up so bad.

Something I've seen across stories is that audiences have a really hard time noticing that they are being lied to when characters or narrators say one thing and do another. I think it's a mirage coughed up by the suspension of disbelief required to consume a story in the first place. We see a lot of villains who are supposed to be criminal masterminds, yet to make the plot go they have to behave like utter idiots. We're willing to put up with that, as long as it seems like they're supposed to be brilliant in-universe.

Then Rian Johnson throws a character like Miles Bron at us. The whole point of Miles is we're supposed to roll with the "in-universe mastermind" tropes, but only up to a point. The message of the film rests on the audience's ability to snap out of it, pick up their critical thinking skills and go, "Yeah, this guy never did one smart thing. Just a lot of audacious things, because he's too sheltered and dumb to understand the consequences."

But if you check the Headscrachers for Glass Onion (and if you care to look at any right-wing critiques of the film), you'll find a lot of people groping for reasons Miles is smart, actually. Maybe Blanc just called him dumb to get a rise out of him! Maybe he's smart socially but dumb with business! Or vice-versa! Maybe the film is badly-written!

No, he is very dumb. Truly. And I don't think the film is badly-written. But some people just blow right trough a sign reading "STOP RIGHT HERE, THIS TROPE IS BEING SUBVERTED, THE DETOUR IS THIS WAY" stagger off the path, and wind up dead in a ditch. Metaphorically speaking.

The above Troper - who is upset by Tai Lung's lack of a redemption arc, while expecting a nuanced story where the bad guys aren't all bad - has failed to detect a nuanced story where the good guys aren't all good.

In China, audiences need a stop sign that reads "Actually, the brilliant teacher is still learning and can do even better." This isn't too jarring, especially given the relationship between Oogway and Shifu. Shifu admits Oogway is a better teacher than him, and smarter than him. Even when he doesn't understand the lesson and loses hope of ever understanding it, he doesn't blame the turtle, he blames himself for just not getting it, and prepares to clean up his mess the best way he knows how. For his part, Oogway was clearly trying to get some hard lessons into Shifu's head - up to and including, "You don't actually need me to guide you down the path, you need to start looking around and trying to understand it for yourself..."

"Bye-eeee!"

Oogway is teaching in accordance with Theravada Buddhism, which is basically the philosophical equivalent of trying to get the dog to notice you've dropped the bacon on the ground and he's not gonna get anything by sniffing your fingers.

Tai Lung's return is an emergency situation, and if Shifu's not careful he'll be trying to reach enlightenment from the Spirit Realm (which does seem doable, given that Oogway continues to train and meditate himself). So Oogway leaves Shifu a $50, says, "You will have to find bacon without me," and buggers off. Permanently. And you know what? After three films, it works!

"Ah, you have finally mastered your Pride. Never stop learning, my most stubborn student!"

On the other hand, a Western audience has much less patience for jerk-ass teachers - and while they do have experience with Trickster mentors, it's much harder for them to see where Oogway is coming from, and why he nopes out instead of just being honest when it's important! They need a much bigger stop sign that says, "SHIFU IS ACTUALLY A SLOW STUDENT AND A BAD TEACHER AND OOGWAY HAS BEEN DESPERATELY TRYING, AND FAILING, TO CORRECT THIS PROBLEM FOR DECADES." But that's unnecessary and nonsensical in China. What we ended up with is much more subtle and open to interpretation. Some people decided to interpret it as, "Oogway's a troll, Shifu's an idiot, Tai Lung got a raw deal, nobody ever admits any of this, and this movie is stupid."

It's true, nobody ever gets called a troll or an idiot - that would be incredibly disrespectful in China, so that's a nonstarter - so you have to draw your own conclusions based on what they do. We see Shifu having a lot of difficulty in picking up what Oogway is laying down. He trusts Oogway implicity and knows there is always some kind of wisdom being imparted, but he gets impatient and tries to speed up the lesson, or he grabs for the most obvious interpretation and runs, or he just gives up and falls back to something he understands a little better.

Like when he gets sick of waiting for Oogway to blow out the candles and get to the point and he douses all of them with a cool move. Oogway is modeling the behaviour he'd like to see - Shifu really needs to slow down and learn patience. But Shifu responds as if the lesson is, "My Master needs help blowing out candles!" which is just silly, but he's going too fast and not paying attention.

Now watch Po listen to Oogway... and watch Oogway listen to Po! Oogay doesn't run in and go, "We don't have time for this! Tai Lung's coming! Get your shit together!" He lets Po set the pace, reflects back his feelings, and offers a little nudge. Which Po absorbs and thinks about at his own pace, instead of pushing to understand everything as fast as possible right now. Ideally, that's how it should go, but with Shifu this approach has about as much impact as boinking croutons off a brick wall.

So it's not too difficult to imagine that Shifu let his pride get the better of him in educating Tai Lung, while ignoring multiple nudges from his own teacher, because he was just too focused on his ultimate goal and going too fast.

In this case, his ultimate goal was a shiny piece of paper his Master rolled up and stuck in a cool-looking temple, all to give some future student a nudge to help them understand, "Self-worth isn't earned or bestowed in this way, it is intrinsic." And Shifu focused on proving his worth as a teacher by trying to turn out a student who was worthy of the scroll!

"Son, I am beginning to suspect you just ain't right in the head."

How can a friend and teacher manage this without stepping off the path of Theravada Buddhism, which a Chinese audience will recognize and expect to remain consistent? The only thing to do is back off, give your student some room to screw up, and nudge him again when he's open to listening.

Unfortunately, that took a very long time. Decades. In the meantime, Tai Lung grew up expecting to make his father proud by earning the scroll.

"What do you MEAN I spent my whole life training and I'm STILL NOT GOOD ENOUGH?"

There is something that I was taught explicitly, because I learned how to teach preschoolers: it is super easy to get kids to believe your love is conditional and dependent on their ability to get good grades and perform. Like, you can swear up and down that you love your child no matter what, but if you lose your shit and take them to Disneyland when they make Student of the Month, the kid is going to draw their own conclusions. You know how Tai Lung complains about how hard Shifu drove him to train? You can do that with praise just as easily as with discipline. More easily, sometimes.

In China, that's a perfectly acceptable way to teach a child, no further explanation necessary. In the West, not so much, but the writers can't hit us over the head with how wrong it is because in China, it's fine. So we have to watch and pay attention to how they act.

In the flashbacks, we never see Shifu being anything but loving and supportive, even when Tai Lung rips off a piece of his moustache and causes him obvious pain.

We never see the leopard boy eat all of his dad's bamboo furniture and cause a freakout (presumably followed by apologies on both sides). Young Shifu seems to have two modes of parenting and teaching: "I'm proud of you" and "Wow! Great job! I'm extra proud of you!" the second of which is reserved for punching and kicking real good. If that's all his dad seems to want from him, and the solution to every problem is to train harder and punch and kick better, it's possible Tai Lung's first experience with real failure is not getting the Dragon Scroll. You know, the thing his dad named him after.

His lack of experience with failure is evident in his reaction; he has no emotional maturity, he's like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Shifu taught him how to punch and kick real good, and did not teach him how to deal with failure, frustration, and a lack of outside validation. That's because Shifu himself is super bad at all those things!

Kung fu is not just punching and kicking and going as hard as you can, it is listening and adapting and approaching situations with open-minded humility. When Shifu rolls up and presents his first student like an art project to be graded, Oogway knows he done messed up. All he can do is nudge them away from a lesson neither one of them is ready to learn yet, and back off.

"Ultimately, my stubborn student, this is my failure, but I'm not sure how to resolve this situation. And your kid is a ticking time bomb, do you not even see that?"

Unfortunately, Shifu's flawed teaching method has resulted in a student who knows nothing but punching and kicking, so all he can do is punch and kick. Real good. "Laying waste" to the village was a late add, to help the audience understand how badly Tai Lung melted down, but it makes perfect sense in this context. If he's not getting the validation he needs for his skill, he'll beat up the whole Valley trying to prove he's the best. And when he gets back to the Jade Palace, no, somehow he has still not punched and kicked hard enough to get what he's after, so he tries to beat up the people standing in his way. Maybe that's how you prove yourself worthy of the scroll!

Alas, it was not. And with a student too misguided and dangerous to teach - yet who still might be able to learn, and help Shifu learn - pausing his rampage for a few decades to allow Shifu some more time to get a clue was the best option Oogway had.

Thank heaven for plot devices!

It turns out, Shifu is capable of improving, through immense pain and suffering. After his failure with Tai Lung, Shifu's despair leads him to fall face first into teaching Tigress with Oogway's method...

...That is, at least he backs off and lets her learn she's going to get no validation from the outside, so she stops looking for it. That's enough to keep her from having a total meltdown when she doesn't get what she wants - it's not a betrayal, it's just par for the course. She goes off by herself, because she's learned to solve her own damn problems (as have the rest of the Five, who follow her), and she almost gets them all killed, 'cos Shifu still doesn't know how to teach humility.

It takes him a few movies - he expects to learn everything through hard work and suffering and so, inevitably, he does.

Just to hammer home how badly Shifu messed up, and how fundamentally flawed Tai Lung's understanding of kung fu is, when Po just hands him the scroll, Tai Lung doesn't get it.

Po is a Mahayana Buddhist. He always tries to enlighten his enemies. When they make it clear they're not ready for it, he'll do what he can to keep them from screwing up everyone else's chance to learn.

So Tai Lung gets yeeted direct to the Spirit Realm. But, it is possible to keep learning in the Spirit Realm, as Oogway and Kai show us in the third film. We just don't see Tai Lung again until the animated series, 'cos no matter how cute he is, he's not the protagonist.

Also, I think the writers can't help but noticed how badly Tai Lung's arc landed with some audience members. There is no good way to address that in under two hours of film. Look how long it took me to unpack it in text!

In the end, the Dragon Scroll isn't meant to be useless, or an elaborate troll from a Trickster archetype. It's a nudge in the right direction. For Po and Shifu, once they slowed down and thought about it, it landed. Tai Lung just wasn't there yet, and showing him that the scroll was nothing but a shiny piece of paper wouldn't have gotten him there, no matter when it happened. But respect to the Dragon Warrior for trying, that's just how he rolls. He's not wrong to try, but Oogway's also not wrong about enlightenment not being a thing to teach.

That's why ya boi gets Oogway's staff, and Shifu ends the film series still needing a little more time to learn.

[kasey-writes-stuff]

MCYT Tickle fic exchange

I got @sleepy--anon <3 /p and I went with the prompt of Sometimes when Sapnap is editing, Dream will just sit next to him on the floor, cross-legged, and start "stealing" little items off his desk until he notices. When he looks at him he gives Sap an "innocent" smile, but as soon as Sapnap takes off his headphones and pushs the chair back he jumps up and runs off giggling hoping he'll chase him 😊

Sapnap was sat editing and Dream was sat on the floor beside his desk criss cross applesauce, Dream began to grow slightly bored and began to slowly steal things of sapnaps desk! Sapnap didn’t even notice at first but after he stole sap’s water bottle that’s when he noticed. So without a word he took his headphones off and quickly pushed his chair back and within seconds Dream took off!

Dream was running as fast as could but giggles bubbling up and eventually out made him slow down involuntarily and so before he could even make it to the back door and to the yard sapnap was able to grab Dream and carry him to the couch, he quickly sat on his waist effectively pinning him down! Dream squeaked as giggles already poured out “EEK sahhahappp!”

Sap smiled happily “What giggling already?” He says sarcastically knowing already how much of an anticipatory giggler dream is “sahhappp yoouuu ahhahallrhehehahhaddyyy knohohowww!” He smirks “yea yea I do! Let’s not make you wait any longer then” He quickly scribbles on Dream’s ribs making Dream wiggle around beneath him as he squeaked before he began laughing softly “EEK SHAHAhahahhapppp!”

Sapnap smiles smugly “yes dreamlee? Too ticklish? Hmm are you too ticklish for the tickly tickles hmm? Well what if I just went right here?” He vibrated his finger tips into the spot where your pits and ribs meet and Dream squealed before falling into full laughter! “EEEEP SAAAPP NOHOHOTT TTTHEHERREHHE!” Sap smirked softly “oh? But this is such a good spot dreamlee!”

“BUT IHIHITTSSS NNHAHAHTTT!” Dream yelled between laughter and sap snickered “oh so should I move then? Maybe to right….” He paused moving his hands to hover over different areas of dream’s body in attempt to drag out things and to keep Dream guessing… Dream giggled residually “sahahppp eheheh” Sap couldn’t help his fond smile as he looks at Dream “what can’t take the anticipation hmm? Too much for you?”

Dream nodded softly smiling sheepishly “mhm” Sap gently ruffled his hair “Alright alright so is there a specific spot you want tickled dreamlee?” Dream blushed softly feeling flustered at trying to think of a spot… “uhm well… I… of you don’t mind… maybe my thighs… and then my tummy and hips..” Dream was blushing beyond belief as he spoke and as he finished, Sapnap was smiling widely grinding his best friend cuter than he could ever believe someone could be “Of course dreamie

He wasted no time as he moved to sit on dreams shins and quickly began scribbling on dreams inner thighs making him squeal as he fell into frantic high pitched giggles “EEPP sahapnahahpp ehehheheheh!” Sapnap grinned smugly in satisfaction loving dreams high pitched giggles “yes dreamlee? Is this good or do you want squeezes instead because I’ll do which ever you prefer” his smug smile turned genuine as he looked to dream awaiting a response, Dream thought about it a bit “thihihiss ihihisss gohohoddd fohohorr nohohoww”

Sapnap nodded “alright just tell me when you want me to switch to squeezing or else just move spots” Dream nodded and laid there giggling happily for a few minutes the scratches were very tickly but also relaxing and to be honest he was keeping things slow for a bit in hopes he could last sapnap’s big finish longer… After another few moments dream begins to speak up “heheheyy sahahapp?” Sap pauses for a few moments “mhm what’s up Dream?” Dream giggled residually at first “cahahnn yoouuu uhuhumm chahhann yoouu… can you go for the big finish… I wanna see how long I can take it this time”

Sapnap nodded “of course dream! You ready?” Dream nodded an excited but nervous smile on his face “I’m ready…” Sap smiled softly “okay then… 3…2…1!” He quickly pushed up dreams shirt to his ribs and began blowing raspberries on his sides as one hand vibrated into his inner thigh and his other squeezed at his hip and even sporadically ran his hand up to where his armpits and ribs met and his very top ribs!

Dream hiccuped before loud laughter began flying out “*hic* EEEE SAHAHAHAPP IHIHITTSSS SOHOHO BAHHAHAAAA NAHAHTT THEHEHE NIHIBBSSS!” Suddenly sap had begun nibbling on dream’s side and tummy causing a surprised shriek for escape him mid sentence, sap smirked softly as he spoke between nibbles and raspberries “Awe can you not take the nibbles? Are they too ticklish hmm? Are they just so ticklish it’s maddening because of how it makes you wanna run away and escape it but yet also you don’t wanna actually get away”

Dream’s face was very very red so red the red began to bleed to his ears and neck he was not good at taking teasing at all despite being very good at dishing them out “SHUHUUTT IHIHITTT SHUUTTT IHIHITT SSHUHUTR IHIHITT!” Sap simply grinned smugly “Oh right teasing makes it so much worse aweee it makes it all tickle sooooo much more and you know what else would make it tickle more?” Dream looked at sap through his nearly mirthful tear filled eyes “WHAHHATTT?!”

Sap’s smirk grew to devious grin as he says “if I focused here” he focused right on the edge of his hip where his hip and thigh met with one hand, “And here” his other hand moved to the back of his thigh “and finally… here and if I sped it all up!” And so his mouth moved to dream’s lower belly! His mouth and hands sped up to full speed! Dream snorted before he fell into silent laughter and after only a minute tears fell down his cheeks making him immediately begin pushing at sap’s head and tapping his arms to signal for him to stop!

Sap quickly stopped and began rubbing the areas to help stop the ghostly tickles, Dream giggled residually as he took in deep breathes “hohohoww lohohonnggg dihihiddd ihihihi lahahssttt?” Sap smiled as he ran a hand through dreams hair “hmm I’m not sure exactly we forgot to set a timer but I think about four minutes? Last time I think it was about three so your stamina has increased by about a minute then but your ticklshness has definitely not decreased! If anything maybe it increased as well!” Dream rolled his eyes as he lightly shoved him before grinning deviously “oh shut up! Say sap has your stamina increased at all…”

Before sap even attempted to answer he was up and off the couch Dream quickly running after him “C’MERE SAPNAP!” “GET AWAY DREAM”

The end

[stickyy]

Can I have a gn reader x Aizawa? Maybe a college AU where Aizawa doesn't know how to handle his crush because he was awkward when he was young and ended up a bully who was handsy. Thank you!

EEEE this is my first ask so i hope you like it anon! :D thanks so much for requesting!

DISCLAIMER: i do not condone or encourage any of the behavior outlined in the following text. this is a work of fiction, and should be treated as such. :)

wordcount: 2299

warnings: dubcon, verbal abuse, slight dumbification, forced oral sex, brief mentions of gagging/vomit (doesn’t actually happen), aizawa is an law student asshole, quirkless!AU, ooc? more likely than u think

notes: im not like a writer so when i put this in word count and saw it was 2k words i gasped-

MIDTERM

Without a doubt, Aizawa’s the smartest student in your Civil Procedure lecture. You admire him; you’re both first years, but he already has an incredible work ethic and results to show for it. He works two part-time jobs to help pay for school (alongside his impressive scholarship), studies into the late hours of the night (mostly due to his being kept awake very loud roommate), and, despite a bad habit of regularly showing up to your 8 am class slightly hungover, still manages to produce the top marks in the class. 

You’re envious of him, because you’re the exact opposite. Your tuition is paid in full by your parents, you have a wonderfully quiet apartment all to yourself, and you study as best you know how, only to practically fail every assignment. You wish you could be surprised, but the material is a dreadfully bland concoction of boring procedure and esoteric theory that you rarely get further than three or four pages into a chapter. You want to like law, you really do, but there’s something about the intricacies of drafting lawsuits that goes in one ear and out the other. It’s no surprise that you sought out Aizawa’s help, desperate to at least pass the class with a decent grade. 

You wish you hadn’t. 

You don’t understand what you do that bothers him so deeply, but something about you coaxes cruelty from somewhere dark inside of him. You always scurry towards the back of the lecture hall to grab a seat next to him, doing your best to be quiet and unassuming, but he shoots you a venomous glare or a soft flurry of harsh words. And you get it, to an extent- some days you walk into class chattering a little too loudly on the phone, and on others you loudly shuffle around in your book bag to try finding the notes that you attempted to start for this lecture (if you even brought them that day). You know it’s annoying, but you also know you don’t deserve the downright verbal abuse he throws at you for it.

“It’s hard to take notes if you forget your textbook. Try being prepared for once,” he’ll sigh as he slides his textbook to you. Like a good student, he took notes for lecture the night before, but it still took some convincing for him to spare you his textbook.

“Do you ever shut up?” He’ll interrupt you as you babble about your difficulties understanding the most recent lecture. You want to retort, tell him off for being rude, but the words die in your throat; he radiates an annoying apathy that makes you doubt the efficacy of anything you say to him.

“You wouldn’t fail every assignment if you actually studied. Or maybe, you’re actually just stupid?” He’ll quip as you clutch your paper, a red ‘47’ scrawled in the upper corner of the page littered with your professor's critiques and question marks. By contrast, Aizawa’s paper is pristine, donning a singular red mark of ‘98, nice work!’.

With a well placed glare and the sour baritone of his voice, laced with exhaustion, it’s always enough to make your stomach drop from shame and embarrassment. Under normal circumstances, you’d never allow anyone to speak to you that way, but your grade was a dire situation, and with the midterm upcoming, you forcefully swallow your pride and ask him for his help.

You have to beg, but Aizawa agrees to tutor you the day before the midterm. This grade is a make or break for the class- if you do poorly on this exam, you’ll have to drop the lecture to salvage your gpa, putting you half a semester behind your peers. It’s motivation enough to deal with his poor attitude, and the two of you end up reviewing in an empty studying room on the top floor of the library. You began the session alert and determined to catch up, but studying with him shows you just how far behind you are. The textbook sounds like foreign poetry coming from his mouth; Aizawa is nothing short of eloquent when explaining the complexities of something as boring as filing lawsuits, and you spend most of the two hours spent just zoning out, completely unable to focus.

“You’re just wasting my time at this point.” The break in his cadence snaps you out of your trance, unfocused eyes meeting his tired ones, slightly lidded in annoyance, “Are you even trying to remember the material? Or are you just expecting me to spoon-feed it to you?”

Your throat catches, forcing you to swallow a lump as you attempt to ignore his words. 

“I am trying! I just don’t understand why there are two approaches, is all,” You whine, flipping back through your sparse notes to find the section that contained the explanation. 

“I went over that almost 3 chapters ago. If you were paying attention, you would’ve stopped me by now. It’s hard to believe that you even got into this school, if this is how you studied in high school. Did your daddy pull some strings with his buddies in admissions?”

Your eyes narrow, searching harder for the correct section in your notes. That’s a pretty low blow, and even if he’s not completely wrong, it still stings. You now know for a fact you didn’t even read this part of the text, but you keep your eyes trained on the page. At this point, you’d do anything to avoid looking at Aizawa, lest you begin to cry.

“Don’t be an asshole,” is all you can muster, voice shaking with unshed tears, “Would it kill you to be a little nicer? It’s hard to focus when all you do is insult me.”

“It’s hard to focus?” He repeats, his tone a sickly sweet mockery of yours. “Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s my fault. You’re a lot dumber than you think, if you even think at all. The midterm is tomorrow, and we’re just now getting into chapter five. Don’t get mad at me for actually trying to study; if I was holding your hand through it all, we’d still be on chapter one.”

Your vision blurs and a single tear hits the lined paper of your notes, causing the ink to blur as the drop absorbs into the page. You clench your jaw and take a breath before standing up, opening your backpack to put you things away. You didn’t have to take this abuse, you could study on your own. Even if you did poorly, you’d have some of your dignity left.

“It’s pretty rude to just walk out on someone trying to help you,” Aizawa says after a moment, closing his notes shut. “Not only do you give me a headache every single morning, but I try to tutor you and you want to leave without even thanking me? I’m busy, you know? I take time that I don’t have to spare just help your sorry ass out, for free, and you’re not even capable of learning anything from it.”

You sling your bag over your shoulder and move to leave, but you find yourself face to face with Aizawa, his tall frame blocking the door, arms crossed over his chest, and a thoroughly disgusted expression plastered on his features. 

“I should charge you a fee, just for completely wasting an afternoon. Absolutely ridiculous,” His tone is a juxtaposition to his demeanor; he sounds more amused than annoyed, a jeer underlying the words. It makes you feel sick, and you’re suddenly grossly aware of the fact that you're alone with him, the only method of escape blocked. It feels dangerous, and you want nothing more than to be at home, alone and safe.

“H-how much?” You stutter meekly, eager to appease him. “I don’t really have any cash on me but if you have Venmo-”

“That’s not quite what I had in mind,” Your heart starts to jackhammer against your ribcage and panic sets in. You’re frozen in place, unwilling to ask him to elaborate. You may not be very bright, but you have a good idea of what he’s going to ask for, and you can think of a million things you’d rather do instead.

“I know your pretty little skull is practically an echo chamber, so listen closely, okay? We both know that no matter how hard you try, you won’t be ready for the exam by the end of tonight, and I have to work in an hour and a half. So, if you behave and do what I ask you, I’ll let you copy my exam answers tomorrow. Understand?”

You’re silent, paralyzed by fear. A part of you wants to run, desperately, but your mind drifts to the midterm. You know that without any help, you’ll surely fail.

That’s how you end up on your knees in front of him, tears finally streaming down your face from choking on his thick cock. 

“That’s it,” he groans breathlessly, eyes fluttering shut as his head presses back against the door, “I knew you were good for something. I bet this is how you convinced your other teachers to give you a passing grade, huh? A few cocks down your throat-fuck, to save your gpa, I wouldn’t put it past you, dumb slut.”

You hate this- hate being reduced to just a mouth for him to fuck. You hate how he sneers down at you, his eyes alight with sadistic pleasure. You especially hate the treacherous way your spine tingles and heat pools low in your stomach at his amused growls and degrading remarks. He’s just as cruel with the way he fucks into your mouth, disregarding your comfort entirely, hand in your hair roughly guiding your head over his length. He’s almost painfully thick, stretching your lips wide, tickling the recesses of your throat in a grotesque way. You try to wiggle away slightly, just to take a small breath; you’re beginning to feel dangerously lightheaded. You begin to pull your head away but he thrusts his hips upward, holding your head down and  forcing your lips to wrap around the base of his cock.

“S’okay, baby, just relax that empty little head of yours, no need to breathe right now,” he sighs, watching you struggle against him with a smirk, watching the fear bloom in your chest and your mind buzz with the lack of oxygen. Your thrashing shifts his cock in just the right way and you violently gag, eyes widening with the painful sensation. You’re almost convinced he’s going to let you pass out, right before he yanks you off of him. You cough violently, gagging a few more times, drool spilling out of your mouth.

“Throw up on me and a failing grade will be the least of your problems,” he growls, and the threat is a sobering reminder of how fucked up this is. You meet his expectant gaze, and reluctantly return to the task at hand. You can hold out just a little longer, you tell yourself; his hips are beginning to move on their own accord and you know he won’t last much longer. All you have to do is hang on and it will all be over soon.

You know that he’s just a bully, that you’re just doing what you have to do in order to pass this class, that you’re worth more than your grades, that you aren’t stupid- but the dark part of your mind questions if he’s right. Maybe you do belong on your knees, because what do you know? Maybe you are just a dumb slut; there’s no need to study if the only thing you’re good for is swallowing.

The shameful thought forces a new torrent of tears to pour from your eyes, gagging once more on both your tears and his cock, and the look of pure despair on your face pushes him over the edge. Aizawa yanks your head from his cock with a curse and you flinch as his hot cum hits your face. There’s a lot of it, the viscous seed slowly dripping down your face. The sensation is downright disgusting. You feel dirty and used, your throat sore, knees burning, lips swollen from his brutal assault. He presses the tip of his cock on your cheek, smearing his load all over your skin with a cruel laugh.

Through your panting, you keep your eyes closed for a little bit, hoping that maybe this is an awful nightmare and you’ll wake up in your dorm, with an extra day to study and a little more hope in your heart. 

The sound of a camera shutter rips you from your fantasy, opening your eyes to see Aizawa grinning at his phone. You’re too shocked to say anything, only staring at him incredulously from your position on the floor in front of him.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, you know?” He hums as he tidies himself up and grabs his bag. “So photogenic, I’ll be able to get off to this for weeks. Who knows what good you’d be if you were dumb and ugly.”

You didn’t notice that you had stopped crying, but the fresh tears and sound of your own sobs call your attention to fact.

“Try and clean up before you leave, alright? I know you’re a little too stupid to remember, but I don’t think it’d be a good look for you to walk around covered in cum.”

The door clicks closed, and through your sobs you look around at the room, only to notice that there aren’t any tissues left laying around. You hate him, you hate him, you hate him.

(But at least you get an A- on your midterm.)

[neon-junkie]

Please may I get a request for flaco, Kieran, Javier or Sean for their first time with a Male (or gn) reader? If you’ve already done something like this could I please have a link? Thank you for making all these amazing works, you make me smile, have a good day :)

These are all gender-neutral reader ^_^  and eeee thank you :D<3

Flaco

Honestly, Flaco is holding back the urge to really pound you.

He wants your first time to be romantic, true love making, and he sticks to it at first.

But after a while, Flaco can't help that he manhandles you a lot more, or that his thrusts get rougher. But if you want him to return to slow and sappy, just ask, he's happy to change.

He loves kissing along your neck and collarbones, followed by trailing down your stomach and, finally using his mouth on you.

And he's not finished until you're drained, he wants you to remember this, and he's going to ensure you do.

Kieran

Kieran's nervous, probably more nervous than you are, but his nerves don't hold him back.

He'd much prefer to have his first time with you in a comfortable setting, like a hotel room, but if either of you can't wait, then your tent will do.

He'll outrightly ask "how do you like it?" just because he doesn't want to assume anything, or accidentally do something you dislike.

He cums pretty quickly, but he's all for multiple rounds; that's his usual style.

Very happy for either you or him to take the lead! He just wants to ensure you enjoy yourself!

Javier

It's obvious that Javier's trying to hold himself back. He's usually perfect at taking his time and being a tease, but he's been aching to get with you for so long...

Both of you are going to end up very hot and sweaty, and of course, loud, so it's best you don't do it in camp.

He'll never admit this, but he is nervous, very nervous actually, yet refuses to let his nerves get in the way and 'ruin' his first time with you.

He's the type to go "So, how was that?" straight after sex.

Javier loves after-sex cuddles and if you're up for it, he'd love to have another round with you.

Sean

He's nervous, but he covers it up well with his usual, generic humour.

Is definitely the type to blow raspberries on you and introduce you to "Macguire Jr."

He cums quickly, like really quickly... sorry... but if you give him a few minutes he'll try again! and if you don't orgasm during sex, he's happy to help you out after.

He's not really bothered about 'taking the lead' and prefers to do things 'in the spur of the moment,' unorganized and chaotic, just like Sean.

Sean gets LOUD and very giggly, so for everybody's sake, please don't ever fuck him in camp... ever...

[junicai]

Relationship with NCT Dream

➣ MARK ☾ mari

½ of the best friend crew

honestly at the beginning, mark and aria weren’t very close, having only really seen each other in passing or with johnny

but after being dropped into training together the two quickly became fast friends, and now they’re borderline inseparable

you thought you knew pain? watch aria’s reaction to mark’s graduation from dream :)

mark’s the reason why aria felt confident enough to pitch some of her lyric ideas to the team, after staying up until 4am to help her make some edits so she was as confident as possible

kinda just, rests his head on her shoulder? and wraps his arms around her waist when he’s tired

mari being confused in foreigner: ???

aria said once in a vlive that she finds mark really comforting to be around - when she feels stressed or worried about something she’ll go to mark’s room and just sit on his bed for a while

aria is so close with his parents - “ahh, how’s my favourite child” “i’m doing great mom.” “no not you, how’s aria?” “wh-hu-MOM?”

you’d swear sometimes mark is younger than her, considering the pout he puts on and how much he whines when they’re not on the same team together for promotions

mark big protecc boi but also little small cuddly boi

they’re so soft for each other ( ╥ω╥ )

in one of the fancams for mark’s solo stage during superm, someone zoomed into aria singing along with him in the wings and dancing to herself with the Proudest Smile™

he’s! so! proud! of! her! constantly! she could be walking and he’d be like “omg get it”

when aria refuses to get up and make herself food (this happens way too often, she just gets into the groove of her work and doesn’t want to move) mark gets her to by threatening to do it himself

consistently caught by czennies just standing behind her and holding her hand in crowded areas - airports, waiting rooms, etc.

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

mark and aria were standing off to one side as the mc explained the rules of the game they were about to be playing. mark looked totally confused, and elbowed aria in her side before looking down and mouthing “what?” to her. aria opened her mouth, before closing it and looking down at the ground, muttering to herself, “결합… 結合….. le chéile…. le… le.. oh oh - combined! we have to put them together, markie.”and thus, a new confusion meme was born

➣ RENJUN ☾ renjaria

renjun and aria room together while she’s promoting with dream

they were so awkward around each other at the beginning :(

only really spoke in passing, or when they had to

it was renjun that broke the ice at first, asking if she wanted to go shopping for the dorm together

now it’s their thing

“no aria, we can’t get more ice-cream we’re all supposed to be on diets.” “but  ｡ﾟ･ (>﹏<) ･ﾟ｡ please”

he’s lowkey soft for her but he’d rather throw himself off the roof then tell her that

piano pals

he started teaching her how to properly play once he found her messing around on a keyboard in the studio one day

they actually argue quite a bit

not about big things, but about smaller things that push each other over the edge because of stress

the first time he yelled at her, aria spent the night in hyuck’s room 

hyuck yelled at renjun for making her cry 

now they’re probably the best pairing for talking through their emotions instead of blowing up on each other

they’re both quite opinionated people, and they’ve learnt to navigate that well so fights don’t happen as often

does that stop renjun from teasing aria an within an inch of her life? absolutely not

“i’ll kill you” “can you, reach?” “LISTEN HERE-”

he acts like he’s 10ft tall, excuse you sir you are barely 5′6″

renjun was her mandarin teacher for a while, but then kun kindly told her that her “introduction” was actually calling herself an idiot 

aria has a bad problem with saesangs go away bitches and renjun is iconic for going off on them for her because she doesn’t like to make a big deal out of it all 

he gets so angry on her behalf

that was actually a topic of one of their biggest arguments smh

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

aria was leaning on a pile of books to prop herself up as she leant forwards to try and hang a string of lights on her bedroom wall. renjun walked in, and immediately came to her aid, speaking with a teasing tone. “need a hand?” 

aria, without ceremony just elbowed him in the stomach and used his then folded up figure to push herself up higher. “yes, thank you!”

she got hate for that one, but it was all in good fun and renjun was laughing after it

➣ JENO ☾ nori

aria is his princess and everyone else can fight him

like they’re both doyoung’s children, but if it comes down to it he will lay down his life for her

and not even in a romantic way, just a “you’re too precious i have to protect you” kind of way

czennies thought he was in love with her for the entirety of nct 2018 promotions

this boy was hanging off of her at any given second, and there was an edited video of jeno “glaring” at lucas’ back when the taller boy walked away after hugging aria

it was faked, stan twt needs to chill out

he drags her to the gym 

he’s basically her big brother? but they’re the same age - its a weird dynamic but they make it work

they’re so LOUD together

not chaotic, but he makes her laugh so hard 

vlive 191030: “nono-ah makes my cheeks hurt so i can’t spend too long around him. my sides hurt too ~  ♡(｡- ω -)”

any and all fanfictions written about the two are definitely either coffee shop, university or library AUs

this man walks like a bodyguard around her - boy got the arm over the shoulder, tucked her head into him, covering her face, its a whole ordeal

dispatch released some pictures of aria one day and accidentally blurred out jeno’s face because they thought he was her bodyguard 

is so. so mindful of how long aria spends in the training rooms

like, yes everyone else expects her home before midnight (long story)

but jeno actively makes sure to ask people what time she left the dorm at, and texts her to remind her to take water breaks and to come home at a good time so she can sleep 

these two are the creators of so many iconic vlives - they have a bad habit of going live at 1 or 2 in the morning, just doing random things

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT.

“hi hi! so, nono and i- jeno stop it, stop it! - nono and i are walking down to the park to go feed the birds - yes we’re going to feed the bird- no! we are not going to feed the ducks, bread can kill the ducks! why did you bring brea-”

jeno pulled the camera from aria’s hands. “ari and i,” he looked at her purposefully, “are going back to the dorms because someone forgot to bring the bird seed, and apparently we can’t give bread to ducks anymore.”

*sounds of aria intermittently hitting and scolding jeno ensue*

➣ DONGHYUCK ☾ arichan

the other half of the best friend crew

absolute heathens to be around when they are together

donghyuck is the person aria is closest to, and someone she’d call her best friend (only when she was sure he wouldn’t hear her)

she calls him “the demon child i can’t get rid of” but will, and has definitely pouted when he ignored her for too long

generally aria is a pretty soft spoken person, but not with hyuck around - he brings out all her chaos energy (please pray for the patience of dotae)

the pair have a little tradition of kissing the back of each others’ hands before going on stage for good luck. they can’t even remember how it started, but now its an unnegotiable pre-show ritual

he’s so clingy with her absolutely everywhere its painfully adorable  (ಥ﹏ಥ)

interviews? hyuck has a hand on her knee, or if she’s wearing a skirt he’s tucked his hand in between their chairs so she can hold it discreetly. in the dorms? full body tackle onto the couch, where he proceeds to lay on top of her completely.

because of hyuck’s nickname being the sun, and aria always being around him, czennies gave her the nickname “moon” to go with him

fans thought that aria was older than hyuck for a good year and a half before she released her birthday on a vlive, because she’s normally the one tasked with reigning his chaotic energy in during promotions (that is, if she hasn’t already joined him)

but off-camera, aria is absolutely hyuck’s baby there is no disputing that. aria’s sad?he’s there with ice-cream and a blanket and a baseball bat.

the winnie the pooh character that is on aria’s bed was a gift from hyuck for her 17th birthday, after she made him watch seven episodes of the show on netflix with her one night

yes he complained, but he slapped her hand away when she went to change it to something else

a twitter thread of a czennie comparing their horoscopes together went viral when people realized that it was quite plausible that the pair were each others (platonic) soulmates

after an incident involving blueberries, donghyuck took it upon himself to check the ingredients of every. single. food item in their dorm to make sure it was ok for her to eat

hyuck clowns her for her irish accent, and aria curses him out in japanese

tldr: they cute or whatever

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

donghyuck was doing a vlive in his bedroom, sitting and talking to czennies when aria opened the door to his room quietly. she didn’t say anything, just waved slightly with almost closed eyes before she crawled underneath his covers and tucked her plushie underneath her chin. hyuck didn’t even blink at it - so it must have been a regular occurrence.

➣ JAEMIN ☾ nari

jaemin highkey flusters her

not in a oo you’re so cute, cute boy make nerves go eeee

but he’ll wink at her and teasingly compliment her and now she looks like a firetruck this isn’t fair

he absolutely takes advantage of this where ever possible 

“riri, can i have some?” “no, i just made these you should have helped me (-_-)” “riri~ but you looked so cute making them i didn’t want to interrupt you~” *aria.exe has stopped responding*

but when aria isn’t trying to get her cheeks to stop being red, they’re really cute together 

you’d swear aria is older, by how much jaemin whines for her attention

the mighty battles between jaemin and hyuck

hyuck’s just biding his time for the rooftop fight

kinda panics around her when she’s crying, but is always the first to offer up a hug 

has a period tracker on his phone but no one knows about it 

he doesn’t like to coddle her because they’re so close in age, but that doesn’t stop him from getting protective in certain situations *cough cough the fansign cough cough*

jaemin and aria cuddling when they’re drunk? more likely than you’d think

he definitely professed his undying love for her at one point while being drunk, and chenle caught it on video 

“noona we’re playing that at your wedding” 

designated blanket/pillow hunter at award shows, and if he can’t find one then he usually just gives her his jacket

the amount of coffee these two consume should be illegal 

aria prefers to call him nana and he prefers to call her riri in the dorms, so when either of them get called by their first name by the other it means A: they’re on a schedule, or B: someone’s about to die

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

nct dream on idol room were trying out jaemin’s death-in-a-cup (his coffee) and as the cup got passed around, aria grew more and more concerned with each face the members made. “jaemin if i die from this-”

he only smiled at her while passing over the cup. aria held it up to look at the black liquid skeptically, before sighing in resignation and bringing the cup to her lips to take a sip. 

and then another.

“wait this is good i like this”

➣ CHENLE ☾ leri

hide yo kids and hide yo wives because leri is entering the chat

*cue aria and chenle wearing 2000s rapper clothes with backwards baseball caps*

these two are so chaotically calm

its like the energy cancels out or something 

aria with hyuck is just so loud and obnoxious, and the same with chenle with jisung

so when you put those two together it just turns into le positive vibes

you ever meditated to those 132 hertz sounds? thats them in a sound 

aria will hold him like a baby kitten she’s expecting to try wriggle out of her grip at any moment and its comical because he’s a good head taller than her

aria definitely has a knack for making her groupmates’ parents fall in love with her

every two weeks or so she goes for dinner in chenle’s house upon his mother’s request

they have a mutual understanding of the mental toll it takes to be around the rest of the dreamies constantly

chenle and aria sitting peacefully, watching a cdrama: 

the dreamies, throttling each other: AAAAAAAAAAA

will never admit it but he misses her the most when she goes away to promote

he thinks of her as a big sister and the dorms feel empty without her there

aggressive proud hugs 

so aggressive, he legit tackles her

he had to tone it down after knocking her over once backstage and she narrowly missed clocking herself on a nearby soundboard 

“YAH ZHONG CHENLE YOU HAVE TO BE CAREFUL!”

he always gets a little bit anxious when they eat things outside of the dorms because he’s never seen her have an allergic reaction before and he’d like to keep it that way  (`皿´＃)

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

chenle was particularly restless that day, constantly shuffling about in his seat to the point where renjun forcefully tossed an arm over his shoulders to hold him still while the vlive was still playing.

not one to be defeated, chenle then turned to press his lips to renjun’s cheek playfully, laughing when the older boy turned away in disgust. he turned to do the same to aria, coming closer to her cheek before aria turned her head to face his.

“AAA-” “EW CHENLE WHY”

➣ JISUNG ☾ jiri

oh god oh god oh god

if aria could take this boy and wrap him in a blanket and keep him in her pocket she would - no questions asked 

jisung knows she loves him the most out of dream sorry markhyuck and takes advantage of it every second

she used to coddle him a lot when he was smaller, but now that he’s older aria tries to rein it in as much as possible

that doesn’t mean it goes away completely though

“noona can you cook for me?” “of course jisungie! what do you want?” 

*jeno gobsmacked in the background* “you just told me you were too tired to cook tonight”

aria: big baby, must protect

jisung: tiny noona, must protect

jaemin and aria are really the only people jisung is ok with seeing him be super emotional - and he flip flops between the two depending on the reason why he’s emotional

self-esteem, feeling poopy side of it all? straight into aria’s bed, letting her roll him onto his side so she can tuck his head into her shoulder and covers the two of them with her duvet the way she used to do when he was shorter

this boy cannot curse around her unless he wants to get his ass Beat

dancing bros

they go so hard in their NCT Dance duet videos 

he keeps band-aids in his bag for her in exchange for her keeping an extra bottle of water in hers because jisung always forgets his own

jisung rests his elbow on her head a lot

but only briefly because the last time he stayed there for too long she stamped on his foot

tldr: aria is jisung’s emotional support gnome

FAN FAVOURITE MOMENT. 

jisung and aria were doing the chicken leg battle (this one) to fight for first dibs on the rooms they were going to be sharing for the next week or so. just before they were about to start, mark started laughing and pointing at how high jisung’s leg came up on aria’s, with aria’s knee barely hitting jisung’s mid-thigh

“this is an unfair advantage! this is cheating!”

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #307: Double Cuddle Date (Super Smash Bros Ultimate)

Daisy: (Happily Snuggling Close to Luigi on their side of the sofa) So, Tifa, Cloud, how long you two love birds been a thing?

Tifa: (Happily Snuggling close to Cloud on the other side) For a long while now~ (Giggles Softly) We actually became Childhood Friends wayyyy before we even had feelings for one another.

Luigi: (Smiles Softly) That's neat.

Daisy: Definitely! (Starts Giggling Softly) Though, I'd never expected your boyfriend over there to be a cuddler~

Tifa: (Giggles some more) Yes, well...truth be told, my handsome Cloud loves to cuddle with me~ (Starts Playfully Smirking at Cloud) Even when he tries so hard to deny it~

Cloud: (Starts Blushing as he starts snuggling close to Tifa some more) Well I mean..... she's not.... entirely wrong.....

Tifa: (Gently Rubs the Top of Cloud's Spikey hair with a Sweet Smile) Oh, Cloud~ There's no need to be embarrassmed~ I promise~

Daisy: Yeah, man! We still think you're cool! Not as cool as my Weegie....But still cool, regardless!

Cloud: I know....I just....('Sigh') Really missed you, Tifa.....

Tifa: I know you do, 'Hon~ I missed you too~ (Kiss the top of Cloud's forehead)

Luigi: I think I know where you're coming from in all of this, Cloud.

Cloud: You do?

Luigi: Yeah. Remember that time me, Mario, and Peach went to this Fancy Hotel a few months ago?

Cloud: Yeah...I think I remember Dedede telling me about it some time ago...

Luigi: Yeah well.... I'd be lying if I say that I didn't missed my princess during that time....

Daisy: (Snuggle with Luigi a little more comforting manner) Oh sweetie~

Tifa: I'm guessing you missed him during that time too, huh Daisy?

Daisy: Like crazy! I know my Weegie can fight for himself and all, but I still couldn't help but to worry about him sometimes, you know? Heck, I was even thinking about going to that Hotel myself and see if he and the gang was okay.

Luigi: Daisy....you didn't have to think about doing all of that just for me.

Daisy: Of course I do. You're my everything, Weegie~ I love you so much~

Luigi: (Smiles Softly) I love you too, my princess~ (Kiss the top of Daisy's forehead)

Daisy: (Starts Giggling from the kiss)

Tifa: Aww~ You know? I'm really liking this Double Date so far.

Daisy: Tell me about it! This is sooooo much fun than going to some fancy, expensive restaurant.

Tifa: You can say that again. (Thought up of something interesting) ('Gasps') Guys, I think I thought of something.

Daisy/Luigi: Hmm?

Cloud: What is it, Tifa?

Tifa: This might be completely random...But how about we cuddle.... altogether?

Cloud: ................... What?

Luigi: Uhhhhh........

Daisy: Oh my gosh........(Smiles Brightly) It's brilliant!! We can be in one huge blanket and cuddle the night away!

Tifa: (Smiles Brightly) That's why it's so perfect!

Cloud: (Completely Unsure) Tifa, you sure you want all of us to go through with this?

Luigi: (A bit Unsure) Yeah.... Wouldn't it be a bit......awkward in a sense?

Daisy: Maybe, but it's still worth a shot! (Gives Luigi the Puppy Dog Eyes) Pleaseeeee, Weegie?~

Tifa: (Gives Cloud the Puppy Dog Eyes as well) Pleaseeeeeeeeee Cloud?~ It'll only be for one night....And I promise you'll enjoy it~

Cloud: (Turns to Luigi, who Shrugged, before turning back to Tifa) ('Sigh in Defeat') Alright, fine.... We'll try out the whole..... Cuddling plan together....

Tifa: (Squealed in Joy) Eeee~ Thank you!~ (Kiss Cloud's cheek)

Daisy: We promise you boys won't regret it!~ (Kiss Luigi's cheek before getting up from the sofa) I'll find us a blanket that could cover all of us!

Tifa: (Got up from the sofa) And I'll get us some more snacks.

Daisy/Tifa: We'll be right back, boys~ (Blow out kisses to their respective boyfriends before walking away Giggling)

Cloud: (Facepalms while Groaning) This is gonna be a long night....(Turns to Luigi) Sorry about Tifa, Luigi. She normally doesn't act like this....Even if it is cute....

Luigi: (Chuckles Awkwardly) Oh no, Cloud! it's okay. Really. She seems really nice.

Cloud: (Smiles s Little) Thanks. You and you're girlfriend are pretty cool in our book.

Luigi: (Smiles Softly) Thank you. And don't worry. I'm sure the whole "Cuddling Altogether" plan won't be too awkward.

Unfortunately for the two boys, it was pretty awkward for the both of them at first. But surprisingly enough, as time went on, it actually became pretty nice and relaxing.... Mostly thanks to their girlfriends' love and cute affection towards them, of course.

@keyenuta

@cyber-wildcat

@chompycroc

@luigifan00001

@26shann

@ink-correctsmashbrosbloo

@ma-lemons

[ikn0wyouarebutwhatami]

Naughty Alphabet ;o

@savnofilter , YOU HAVE UNLEASHED THE BEAST, PREPARE THYSELF FOR MINE WRITINGS. (That I hope are suitable to you lol) thanks for giving me that extra push to finally make my page!

Warnings: if you not into the naughties, get outta here before it’s too late.

———————————————————————

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

•Will want v much to knock tf out bc you sucked all of the energy out of him, (thru his dick). But will tend to you until he is sure you are all set and good to knock out with him. (Make sure you go to the bathroom after, bring you a washcloth, help hold you up in the shower bc he fucked you so hard you couldn’t stand....) Aaaaand don’t forget the cuddles, doesn’t care how sweaty y’all are.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

•D-UUUH, his hands!! So he can sMaCk that delectable ass, which is definitely his favorite. Grope, jiggle, poke, the possibilities are endless. But tbh he’d find a way to enjoy you just the same even without access to his arms.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

•WOOOOOOO-EEEE, this boy don’t give a fuck about messes while having sex-it’s called doing the dirty for a reason. He’ll cum on you, make you cum on him, you won’t know what fluids belong where.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

•Its kind of hard to pinpoint a kinky type dirty secret on him bc I’m pretty sure he’d own it. But I’m gonna go ahead and say that he secretly loves when you take the reigns. He’d do anything to make you feel good, but it’s just as fun to watch you going to town, pleasing yourself by bouncing up and down on his dick, not allowing him any access to you.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

•HAHAHAHAHA, he was a sweet boi until he met you. But, Katsuki is a very smart boy, and will have you writhing and begging under him in no time.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

•D D D DOOOGGGY STYLE. He wants full access to that ass. Like mentioned earlier, he likes slapping it, groping it, watching Newton’s third fucking law of motion in play (google it and learn something new). Your ass, to him is fantASStic. And I bet he likes the sound of his balls slapping against your pussy too.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

•I can’t imagine you’d get anything more than a chuckle or two from him, and that’d probably be from how cute he thinks you are in the moment, or what a mess you are, undone by him. But if you initiated a joke or two, as it arises, I don’t think he’d mind and you might get a reaction. I really don’t think he’d appreciate it being continuous though.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

•BAKUBUSH FOR THE WIN! Groomed bush tho, it annoys him when it’s out of control and he doesn’t like the way it feels.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

•It might not be typical romantic, but I’m pretty positive that every time you guys do the deed, he looks at you like you are the only true thing in the world. He loves that you trust him enough and love him enough to let him be inside of you like this, that you feel he is good enough for you. Of course, the way he shows this is by fucking you mercilessly into the mattress.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

•Katsuki is whipped for you. (Though he’d never admit it). So if he doesn’t have access to you, or you are on vacation and he won’t be seeing you for a while, you can bet your bottom dollar that he’s gonna jack off if he needs to. And if he can, he’ll try to do facetime sex with you. If that’s not an option, he’ll do it in the shower to the thought of you. (Which sometimes he enjoys a lot because he can imagine whatever he wants to do to you, and how he’s gonna give it to you when he can see you again.)

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

•Ddlg!! You are daddy’s girl, (or whatever name you prefer), and you and your entire being belong to him, and he loves making you understand that, and hearing you admit it and moan it out of those pretty lips of yours.

•Another one might be you dressing up and looking nice to go somewhere. Like a fancy cocktail party, or one of the hero galas he gets invited to. You guys are always late and everyone always knows why. He loves seeing you stand tall and proud, stomping in those heels and swaying those hips, ready to stab someone’s eye out if they look at you wrong.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

•E V E R Y W H E R E.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

•Anything that has to do with you. But the number one way to get him riled up is to play with him. Like playing dumb and dropping something in front of him, or “accidentally” brushing against his dick when you stand up, stuff like that. And playing hard to get.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

•He won’t share you, or himself with anyone else, so no threesomes or anything like that. He needs to have you all to himself.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

•I’m gonna say it’s an even split between the two. Either way, he wins. He gets to see you wiggle and unwind by his doing, getting himself worked up in the process, or just being straight up blessed every time you decide to go down on him in return. But he really does love just watching the way you react, in either scenario.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

•Will almost always want and do it fast and rough, but if you’re in need of some tender love, he’ll give it to you slow and sensual. Which will probably drive you nuts and it’ll eventually end up fast and hard anyways.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

•He’d rather have proper sex because it’s more fun, but he’ll take what he can get, just to be with you. Quickies happen more often when you guys are out and about and he really needs a piece of you.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

•Bakuboi is a good boi, he doesn’t like breaking rules. So when it comes to doing it in public, it has to be in a place where no ones is gonna catch you guys. (Though he doesn’t really mind the thought of someone catching him giving it to you, cuz no one else can.) As for sexy time introductions of new ideas and toys? To me, he’s a “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” type of guy, but if you want to try something he’s willing to do, he’ll do it.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

•I really think that for any human being, it depends on what kind of mood/day they’ve had. But for a good day? Hours. A really good day? You won’t be able to walk tomorrow.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

•Nah, he’s fully confident he can give you all the pleasure you need by himself. He has to be the best after all.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

•Bring some tissues bc he’ll drive you to crying for release.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

•Katsuki has them sexy grunts, the deep rumble growls that come from his chest, and the occasional curse word. If you guys are on the younger side, I wouldn’t be surprised if his voice cracked as he came.

W = Wild Card (Get a random head-canon for the character of your choice)

•If you got angry with him and denied him sex for a while, he will once again convert into Lord Explosion Murder Guy. He will be on the war path, probably throw himself into work to forget about how fucking horny he is, and everybody should keep at least five feet of distance from him at all times. He probably won’t even be able to relieve himself because he’s so angry he’s scared he’ll blow his dick off.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

•I don’t think he’s the longest cucumber in the patch, definitely above average but not a horse. But he got that girth. Even if you’ve tossed around your share of cucumbers, I’m pretty sure you’re going to have to work up to fit around him.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

•....It gets lower as he gets older, but set aside a private fund between you two for condoms.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

•I firmly believe that he is actually a perpetually sleepy boi, he will knock tf as soon as you are ready to do so with him.

——————————————————————

A/N: I’m not always this ‘silly’ but this is my first post and it’s the way I preferred to do something like this. Please feel free to send in requests and asks and comments and what not, just be patient with me! I hope the format wasn’t confusing, I’ve never used the text posts on tumblr so I don’t know all of the features yet, otherwise I would have added a cut.

[elizabethrobertajones]

14x01 watching notes

RIP Kip, we hardly knew ye.

Well hey, returning friends and people who unwittingly clicked on this not knowing exactly what they're in for. Blowing off the dust and starting a new season of Dabb fuckery, which I spent way too long trying to think of a portmanteau for when I already have the episode downloaded

It's 5am, let's DO THIS.

-

So they start with Dean's Hi I Am A Cop On The Day Before I Retire speech re: hula girls and hawaiian t-shirts which is remarkably prescient of me to have been irrationally upset about that one detail after I binged most of season 13 last night to get me back in the mood. So now I have to elaborate on my one line textpost >.>

Because yes, that is the perfect note to start the season on: Dean thought the good times had rolled, allowed himself to hope, assembled himself a family with mom and step-pop (Bobby counts as a full father but AU Bobby is step-pop), brother, husband, kid... Said kid was promising A World Without Monsters aka Dabb's showrunning tagline for an endgame he teases them. And Lucifer was tucked safely away in an AU with the murderous Michael... And then in a series of events it all came crumbling down and with this amount of goodness in his grasp, he gave up what even when the real Michael was hounding him for it, he couldn't before.

Because in season 13 it is beyond obvious that Dean is tired, an Old Hunter, the best of his game but ready to bow out on that note, and yet for him it's not a matter of stepping back and letting someone else handle it because when Michael and Lucifer were involved, it was beyond personal. He and Sam only EXIST because Lucifer and realMichael wanted them to. And so there was no way this trouble would come to someone else's door, when it was the nasty angel on his shoulder and the devil on Sam's and we have Nougat as their collective responsibility who's the nexus of it all anyway.

-

Eeee the Road So Far text is glowy grace colour on a dark blue background. I'm JIZED for the title card.

-

Goodness, the Road So Far is a weird journey because we see Jack being all useful and magic and then callbacks to 13x01 and 2 where he was a messed up 2 day old and Dean just wanted to murder him.

I haven't outlined any expectations for this episode or even this recap but I suddenly realise that I should probably be wondering how much DeanCas we're gonna get in it, and this rage against Jack is subtextually motivated, for sure, but for me the first 6 episodes of Dean's grief arc were wonderful character stuff but removed from the main plot and therefore in my head I keep boxing them off like a bubble season, like 10x01-3 are, and I legit wasn't even expecting to SEE content from them in the recap, because brilliant as they are I sort of just forgot they were a part of this season despite watching them yesterday. The season for me became so much the Jack And Mary Search that this hiccup at the start didn't meet the requirements to be in season 13 :P

They're just That Time Dean Was Really Sad About Cas Then He Came Back And They Were Cowboys

-

Oh good there was "everybody we've lost" and then a recap of Cas dying and then - oh, we're recapping plot again? Er... everybody? Dean? Who else? DEAN?

this was the thinly veiled subtext of that line anyway since Dean waved off Mary and made it all about Cas anyways but. Yikes, editing team.

-

Jesus I watched season 13 yesterday and I forgot about Asmodeus. You know what, this is pre-coffee AND the 2 types of anti-brain fog medication I gobble in the morning.

But he's that much of a useless lump

Also too much Lucifer nipple on screen pre-coffee. Ick.

-

Nice recapping of Not The Levitating Fight.

-

NOW

Stock photo Nyoom of the season!! Hi Baby! You aren't in this episode because Eugenie said the car wasn't being used this season

-

Sam's got his Vengeance Eyes on but he's all scruffy and grown up so I trust him 10000% to get the job done.

-

OW. FUCK. OW. OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. GOOD USE OF INTERSTITIAL MUSIC

Why were you even listening to Dean's tapes if they fuck you up that badly? IS THIS YOUR VENGEANCE PLAYLIST? I'VE BEEN WAITING 10 YEARS

Actually, I haven't, I binged 4-5-6 as one unit after thinking the show was cancelled during the writers' strike but the point is that Sam and his ipod in 4x01 is immediately in my head because he was listening to his own music and being a hipster douche, but now he is not on demon blood he has not installed an ipod dock because he's GETTING DEAN BACK, DAMMIT but at the same time he's also realising that this means a heavy toll that the only driving music in the car is Dean's stuff...

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Oh no, this must be the guy from the SDCC clip we hadn't seen because Osric Chau is banned forever for illegally uploading them all for us in the past, and all I know is that Deanchael is going to Fuck Him Up and I feel very bad for him

*raises my mug to Osric* I'm sure you tried, dude. And thanks for the previous years.

-

Hi Deanchael. I noticed in a promo pic that his tie has that sacred geometry type pattern on it which is a detail I made a mental note to type out literally anywhere in the like month between there and here and did not so here it is at a hopefully appropriate place.

Based on every other scene setting detail I suspect that this faithful man is actually still within the USA because this is literally the cabin set they re-use for everything. The spoilers made it sound like Deanchael was globe trotting to raise his army but now I see what's around us... Yeah no he's as focused on the US as every other big bad before.

-

Anyway they really specifically chose this prayer to Allah because of how pointed it was about being only for Allah and how he was the best, so I'm assuming Deanchael is here to be like yo God's gone and I'm your last chance of faith

-

Like just ruin his day and he got up at like 4am or whatever the first prayer is to do it and all

-

I hope, like, no offence to any Muslim viewers or anything >.> They sure play fast and loose with a lot of this stuff because Christian cultures are full of bitter non-believers raised in the culture and looking to kick up at the big guy in the sky, which is not an impression I get that Islam is as used to cultural flippancy, regardless of personal beliefs of residents of predominately Muslim countries and cultures. I'm not 100% sure though, because the closest link I've got is my raised-Christian Iranian friend who applies Christian eye-rolling to the issues with being in Iran and heathen so I still get that perspective of middle fingers up at Organised Religion from our discussions about it all... anyway big diversion, still waiting for coffee to kick in :P I just swallowed the last of it so I can only get more jittery from here on out!

-

It's so fuckin weird to see Dean's face confidently reciting verse in Arabic

I mean you don't need the hat, sir. I get it. It's not you in there.

-

Well so far anyway he's playing on the fact that the guy does pray to god and his angels.

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Lol @ this man guessing his way through God AND Gabe to Deanchael's annoyance that he's the 3rd guess and he has to clarify that he's the better one.

Man, Gabriel worked on his reputation. I wouldn't have been able to tell you who Michael was because there wasn't even a kid in my class with that name when I was age 4 busy portraying Gabriel in a nativity play with full impish glee that the real deal would have been proud of.

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Uhoh things aren't looking good for Jamil D: Asking for peace and love is good, you funky little hippy.

Is Deanchael implying that the Syria insurgency is the route to peace? I honestly don't know enough about the American foreign policy politics to know what sort of stance this is though from a liberal leaning show (I mean come on Bobo is a card-carrying socialist, I've seen it on Twitter :P), though to an outside viewer well aware of how fucked up it all is should this have been said on a British program, this is a vast over-simplification.

But we know Michael's main traits are Likes War and then also Warmonger and of course, spoilin' for a fight. So this may be a personal judgement and as much as they're bringing politics into their show I'm just backing right on out and going with this :P That he thinks it is more honourable to stay and fight and that Jamil is a hypocrite for not sticking around to work for peace actively.

-

Oh Jamil hooked up with a woman called Darleen. He is FOR SURE in America.

-

It's so funny to me that Deanchael can fly anywhere and they could have set this anywhere but it still ends up being a wooden cabin in the US. This has to turn out to be a lead to follow with a news report about the poor guy or else this is just hysterical that they couldn't be arsed to mock up even a hint of another country :P

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He knew all this about Jamil beforehand so I have to assume he's really just here to drag him.

-

Man, that throw was GOOD. I'm assuming they either spent all summer playing with wires and stunts or else they've gone back to the drawing board on all this flinging people around business.

-

"A better world" oh we are so on for this World Without Monsters malarky still. This lines up with the clip from Dean they opened on so well - the dark irony of he and Michael working on the same project but from different angles. Dean wants to sort out monsters and bad things so he can go on a beach, aka his version of paradise, and Mikey wants to smush all the sinners, and clean up the planet, which is HIS version of paradise.

-

HECKIN GOOD TITLE CARD

now photoshop those wings on everyone

-

I LIKE SCRUFFY BULLET MAKER FROM THE AU.

He's like so happy to be in a world where you just casually have resources.

Meanwhile poor Maggie has become the de facto nurse and hates it.

Ugh the Bunker is a place where people just show up who yell "Soup's on!"

In my redshirt betting pool, Soups On is the first guy who dies.

-

Promo sceeeeene

I'm so happy Sam and Mary are doing this together. Last season Sam was so upset that Dean got to have a relationship with her, and he had missed out, but without Dean around - no offence to him - Sam and Mary may be focused on FINDING him but this is the work they also need to do for their relationship to start to ground it in something real. It's taken this long with all the separations, but remember that Mary also worked through some of her issues about Sam only last season in the AU with 6 month old Jack. And if she needed that sort of reminder and relationship to warm her up for Sam, her suddenly-grown 6 month old, then there were still a LOT of underlying issues that dated back to the start for her to overcome. Hopefully this puts them on a level playing field, though there's a new conflict brewing for them, with Mary's determined optimism vs Sam's pessimism, born of that depression from last season that never really got treated or resolved, they just managed to power past its current main triggers. Of course now it all just shifts in a Deanward direction.

-

I love how Ketch has been punted to London, at Buckleming discretion to drag him back. This wasn't even Bobo punting him out the door, and he and Buckleming have a violent back and forth over favourite characters, started in 9x06 with Bobo's very first episode when he banished Professor Morrison forever.

-

MARY TRIES MOMMING SAM TO GO TO BED

THEN SCRUFFY GUN GUY IS LIKE "CHIEF"

Chieeeeeeef.

Sam runs the shooow here and I love it. He's their badass MoL hunter leader, a scruffy saviour from another world.

Given Sam is wearing the same shirt and jacket in the promo pics I'm guessing he does not sleep, though I hope he gets to eat the soup.

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"Maggie can you hack the traffic cams?" "um. no."

I love and support Maggie. She is a normal person who happened to live in apocalypse world and she just wants to flirt with the guy from the Gas n Go who probably hasn't talked to her since that got blown up and Jack attacked him over her... I mean, this is better than the AU world but maybe she just wants to be normal? Did anyone ask Maggie what she wanted??

-

SAM. You can eat your soup and run things at the same time! Get back here and eat that soup!

-

"yes sir"

Goodness, this is wonderful. Sam's doing what he was born to do, and then not because that was leading a friggin demon army, but then yes because he's got inherent leadership traits that he defers to Dean all the time because, well, he's there, and he's big bro.

Look, sometimes you need big bro to murder Satan's ass for you forever, but you also should be calling the shots. There's a balance here, where Dean can be the older brother, but Sam can be the boss. Work/life balance. Dean's got your back but you command an army of hunters, like we've all been salivating over since like season 8 when they first said the MoL ran the Bunker as the hub of operations dictating stuff to trusted hunters and the like.

Of course, if Sam is the Bobby here, then who is the AUBobby? I hope we see what's up with that soon, I've been wanting them to bristle those beards in an alpha way at each other for months, because AUBobby was their leader before Sam because Sir Chief.

-

"Sam."

"i'm good"

*mothering intensifies*

"i'm GOOD"

*mothering intensifies*

"How's Jack"

You aren't used to being mothered and it's murdering me completely to my soul. Dean's got SO MUCH MOTHERING all through the show compared to you. He even sees Jody as a mom friend while you crush on her like crazy so you haven't even got that!!!!

Because Chief Sam is the boss of this lot but at the SAME TIME he's getting all these soft tender mom moments he's never got to have before. It's a wonderful balance of nuances to his current life. He's overworked but surrounded by a supportive care team that respects him, gives him soup, and holds his hand, literally in Mary's case. And yet he's the scruffy macho competent boss who knows how to call all these shots, deputise, set up missions, but still knows more than them, how to do traffic cams, I'm sure years of lore over most of these hunters who only learned to deal with what got thrown at them in the apocalypse by trial and error because when do they get lore books? Mary and Bobby and other pre-apocalypse hunters would be few and far between to offer competent training to a populace suddenly all turned hunter.

-

Oh, AUBobby is beating up Jack. Perfect.

-

AAAH DIRECTED BY TJW

WAS NOT ADEQUATELY HOLDING ONTO SEAT

WARN A GIRL

-

I love finally seeing the training room but I'm deeply conscious that this is where Put Up Your Dukes starts and I can't get that fan fic out my mind so I'm just like, Jack, don't lie on the floor, your dads have banged there.

-

I'm so happy that AUBobby is nurturing a grandson, because this is the difference between him and Bobby - that our Bobby had that with Sam n Dean, but AUBobby never did. Though he DID have Mary Campbell to crush on, I doubt it would have softened him and rounded out the harsh places in his soul the same way raising Sam and Dean did, because he had an unrequited love and she hadn't gotten over John, while this recently widowed Mary Winchester actually has made better progress just because of the circumstances of the loss. Anyways Jack has no preexisting history with Bobby so there's nothing weird about him and AUBobby stepping into a nurturing relationship, that Sam n Dean would find uncomfortable in a way, given their relationship with Bobby. And Jack gets yet another strong figure to teach and guide him.

AUBobby looks slim and stands tall compared to Bobby, which I'm largely putting down to posture, and not being drowned in layers. I like this difference - Bobby almost never voluntarily dressed in 1 layer, but AUBobby has a more military slant, and this training sergeant routine with Jack is a good fit to show a difference in his character, that isn't surly old Bobby behind his desk, that he's involved in teaching Jack to fight, rather than helping hunters with lore and swigging whiskey.

I'd assume given the lack of availability in his AU, he's considerably less alcohol dependant, so this is a very different character thing. If Bobby were doing this training, and nothing else was different, he'd be taking a breather to pour them both a whiskey as he imparts wisdom.

-

Demon in nice shoes and dark sunglasses at night to indicate that yes I am a demon I have black eyes :P I assume this is a demon anyway not just because of this detail but pre-season spoilers

-

Ah hearing Cas's name is enough to make my heart pick up. MY GUY!

But then, "Castiel, darling"

Stop trying to make Good Omens happen, it's not going to happen. You can't just "darling" up to an angel and expect that good good romance. Crowley took years to wear Cas down and Cas never actually LIKED him, down to their last real interaction where Cas was just "WTF???? LEAVE ME TO ROT AND DIE" when Crowley saved him in 12x12

-

God I miss that

-

"Oh god."

Same, buddy.

You do, however, realise this is your first words of the season gifset line, though?

Someone ought to write to Dabb and inform him that people make first and last word gifsets and to be more careful.

Especially if in the last episode at the end of the season, Cas's last word is "Dean"

-

Anyway Cas has said 1 line and I can tell he's on top form. Unlike 10x01 he's in a hipster hogroast joint.

-

This demon, with dark black sunglasses inside at night (douchebag) just ordered a coffee, black. WE GET IT, ENOBY DEMENTIA DARKNESS RAVEN WAY, YOU ARE GOFFIC AND IT'S AS BLACK AS YOUR SOUL

-

LOL Cas is sitting under the JACK'S sign.

Demon douche sits under Schultz, which is the death beer. And lemme tell you, TJW is well-versed in this. So well-versed in it he's sat Cas in front of a classic El Sol flyer with the subtle touch required to tell Dean that Cas is his dream girl. He knows his shit.

-

This seriously seems to be implying that the rise of hipster food joints is an effort from Hell to spread chaos on earth

-

Cas sitting with his back to the fire is such an interesting visual, but this is just a note to self for later to guess what it all means

-

THIS FUCKIN DEMON TOOK  HIS BLACK SUNGLASSES OFF TO SHOW OFF HIS BLACK EYES

Dabb is so good at incidental characters, and making me hate this guy for nuanced nonsensical reasons is amazing. This is... art...

-

This is a callback to 5x08 and Dean ranting about hating procedural cop shows then him and sam taking their sunglasses on and off at night every time they made  a pun and I'm 100% convinced since 12x01 and Cas busting through that Mystery Spot sign that Gabriel has been subtly influencing events

-

Okay so we know exactly what is written on demon bathroom walls. I'm taking that as a sideways confirmation that Cain knew full well that Dean had his Colette because he'd seen crude doodles of them doing it

Anyway douchedemon just outright told Cas that all the demons assume he and Dean in particular are banging. Not that Cas bangs Winchesters, as some have implied, without knowing all the details. They've narrowed this info down.

I assume this is also in the Winchester Dossier that Barthamus studied from before meeting them. I love that demons probably do have a filing cabinet somewhere of all the notable assholes they run into in their work, and the Winchesters take up a whole cabinent, but the refresher file summarising them in a paragraph if you don't have time is like, Sam: Lazy boyking, will stab you. Dean: fucking Castiel, will stab you.

-

Cas doesn't even move an eyebrow. Incredible.

-

Cas rarely gets hit with these compared to Dean in the history of the show, and Dean is full of bluster or anger or confusion or alarmed eyebrows. Cas is like... no. fuck you. i'm party!Cas, I have my shit in order.

Though this is from a demon. It's an entirely different thing when Heaven is involved, as they also have their dossier on the winchesters.

Sam: abomination. will banish you. Dean: fucking Castiel. Will stab you.

-

*loud coffee slurp* "what's in it for moi?

Cas, stab him. Stab him now. This is not worth the information. You can find another guy.

-

I'm starting to think Cas with his back to the flames is his unwitting danger from this hellish hogroast place.

-

They use Shultz beer containers to hold the sauces and menus on the table. DEEEEATH

-

Cas speaking slower and threatening to burn him to ash "right here and right now"

this is a gifset that will get a lot of notes from thirsty Cas fans

-

Whaaaaaaaa the entire joint turned out to be owned by and filled with demons who would ever have guessed based on one open fire and that metal hogs head from the promo pics :P

-

Stop hurting him!!!! Misha can't stage fight! This is really unfair!!

I wonder how the poor new awesome fight coordinator took to Misha

"let's just... um..." "hide him behind all these demons?" TJW suggests The fight guy nods sadly.

-

Aww Sister Jo got back to work. Good for her.

-

Sister Jo has no fear and can stroll down a shady alley counting her money

*t-shirt meme* One fear: *flappy wing noises*

"Hey Jo."

-

GHOLY SHIT TRUE FORMS TYHUEOJDSHGFSH DS TRUE FORMS WE SEE WHAT ANGELS SEEE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD SCIENCE HAS CAUGH T UP TO THE DIVINE, SPN CAN FINALL Y SHOW US WHAT ANGELS SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

-

Holy shit I want the gif of this as my blog header. That's shitting amazing.

-

Burning HALO

ALL HIS CHI POINTS LIT UP EVEN WHEN IT MAKES IT LOOK SILLY TO HAVE HIS CALVES GLOWING

-

I wonder if this is what Danneel sees when she looks at Jensen all the time

-

"Why would he say yes to you?"

"Love"

I'm dying and I am dead. I gather that Dean is 100% absent from this episode, but that one comment puts him front and centre and I am in paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain. Everything happening around Michael and because of Michael is because Dean loves his peeps. From Sam staying up hacking traffic cams on vampires to Cas getting his ass handed to him by demons.

-

I bet Cas looks like that single glowstick he had on in the cave when angels look at him.

-

Party!Cas

-

I ruined the fun

-

Jensen gently touches Danneel's face and that's just rude because that's all his tenderness for his wife being turned into a scary villain move between Deanchael and Jo. Don't do this to them!!!

-

Oooof Deanchael pulls from Dean's memory of Anael about what she was like, describing her in the most Cas-like terms, then cuts through her hilarious bull about wanting handbags (this is so meta about sticking middle fingers in the faces of people who think she's a well-paid beard) and then starts telling her she wants love and a family.

Deanchael has used the word "love" twice in a scene and it's horrifying to see the word come out of his face, when Dean is so guarded. Now Deanchael is just looking through Sister Jo and analysing what she wants - and she's playing this game very well but this move of his might still beat her. Because ow. Telling her she wants belonging and family. When she's very much established as a Cas mirror by the reminder she ran away from Heaven and doesn't want to play by their rules.

"It's very, very human of you. And so disappointing." Did all those times Lucifer sucked her grace bring her close to feeling it? To the point of permanent damage? I only ask because I know another guy this might apply to.

-

I wonder how much Deanchael is projecting based on conjectures because he knows Cas through Dean's eyes.

-

"But if they're all these sad, lost, fallen things..." Ya, that's Cas too for suresies

-

SAM AND JACK SAM AND JACK

Jack sitting quietly in meditation, clearly unsettled. A parallel to 13x23 when Dean came rushing in to him having a nightmare, now Sam is having a crack at parenting the boy.

-

Jack lying about how things were fine. Nougat. Hon. You're human now. But not that good at being human. Sam knows your tells :P

-

Sam interrupted mid pep-talk by Mary with some nonsense.

Jack is always so ugh... accepting and kinda flippant. He knows parental figures can be disappointing and get dragged away mid peptalk by some business.

Which he's apparently not involved in. I guess after we see him going on hunts with them in 13x23, he's grounded until he goes through basic training so not only is he useless to help with his powers to find Dean, but he can't even do the easy hunter stuff because he's just a kid.

-

Aww my poor baby Nougat :( He's so angsty. He's a TEEN. Lookit him! All growed up!

-

Uuugh I guess this is Nick. "I didn't talk to him. I can barely look at him."

What I'm getting from this sequence mainly is the sound of Triss's rage at the Bunker layout.

-

*Mary pats Sam's shoulder supportively and walks off*

You're on your own, Chief.

-

Ugh I am not ready for this bull if it's Nick but I have to keep watching to be sure :P

-

Ew it is. EW. What does Mark P HAVE on you all.

At least TJW is shooting the heck out of this to show us how gross Sam finds this all.

Sam's shadow falling over Nick.

I really want to know how this bullshit happened. And yet. No, not really.

-

Oh gross AND they're making Mark P take off his shirt. The nipple I didn't want to see in the Road So Far was not warning enough.

Pre-season ugh speculation was that whatever Crowley did to Nick made him stronger and more permanent apparently even than Lucifer being stabbed out of him.

-

So yeah anyway I guess Jack is in part also sulking about this and I'm with him, because Sam being pulled away from their pep talk time to deal with Gross Man Associated With My Father But Not Actually Him Because Biologically I Am The Son Of A Non-Historical President...

-

Making Sam the one who has to care for Nick is utterly cruel. He has so many deputies. Maybe this is just his personal fear that Nick's still a bit Lucifery. Maybe he just sees this as a gross burden, a manifestation of the ongoing trauma from Lucifer, that even when he's dead he lingers.

-

Plus, it's giving us some reassurance that an angel can be ousted from a vessel without killing them, to throw some options into the Deanchael pot.

-

Still. Nick. Really.

-

I bet Jack is sulking because some little cosmic part of him regenerating deep down in his core, that one lil gold glowy chi point in his big toe, knows that Eugenie forgot his name at SDCC and called him "Nick" and this shit from your creator just weighs on you. Jack is an entity beyond Buckleming and yet born from them, and this is what they beget: forgetting their own child in favour of this old carcass.

-

bitter? moi? *sips coffee noisily*

-

Actually, that's not true but I need some tea because I'm sulky so I'm taking this ragebreak to go make some and then I will sip it noisily in Nick's direction. :P

-

Everything henceforth is under the jurisdiction of hot drink no.2

-

"I don't understand how Lucifer could die and I could live"

I hate you

Eurgh, I bet you anything Dabb pulled a Buckleming and just took the post-it note they gave him when he asked, er, HOW does this happen? and transliterated it into dialogue because 1: all the writers shade Buckleming all the time because I can literally see it ooze out of Perez and Yockey and Bobo's writing but this is the showrunner, guyses. 2: it's such a dumbass convoluted explanation that it only burns out the archangel but if you non-fatally stab it then the guy is fine.

Which begs the question of how the fuck is Gabriel because if we get anything good from this, that fucker is in one hell of an interesting vessel situation compared to Old Nick.

-

PS: I am not sure how culturally saturated this is so we are all clear that Old Nick is a historically used name for Satan and his name has been a joke since 5x01 thanks to Kripke, and now we have to actually deal with that.

-

And then Nick is actually sympathetic to how Sam feels looking at him. I guess Mark P really wants us to feel sympathetic to his new dude.

-

"And Michael... did he tell Lucifer anything about his plan?"

Listen, we NEED acknowledgement that for a month or so Lucifer and AUMichael roadtripped together to assemble from their AU the key of solomon, the fruit of the tree of life, and the blood of a most holy man.

There was a lengthy downtime while people settled in and Dean was allowed to think the Good Times were rolling, and all that time, the weirdest brother roadtrip show ever was going on in the AU, mad enough that I would actually find it hilarious to watch despite enduring Mark P as a result of it.

-

SAM DOES NOT DESERVE THIS

He's not allowed to rest, ever.

-

I bet this is douchdemon phoning him from Cas's phone.

-

"Hello Sam!" says a perky voice down the phone. It's INCREDIBLE how unlikeable this demon is making himself. He's actually my favourite character now.

-

Oh no, Nougat is wearing a different grey shirt. He's really depressed. Someone help him.

-

"He just told you he was a demon?" "he seemed proud of it too"

Sam hates him as well. I can't wait for Sam to come scowl at him.

-

"What do we do?" Maggie asks, completely wide-eyed. Oh honey. Poor, innocent, sheltered Maggie. What were you doing all apocalypse until we caught up with you? You aren't hardened, you're adorable.

-

AUBobby and Rufus (his gun)

-

"I'm coming too!" YAY JACK. Your father is in trouble, he's on a hunting trip and he hasn't been home in a few days, but what a different world all the rest is

-

"I'm not as strong, but I can help," he says, looking tiny beside Sam, bruised up from AUBobby's training, a single layer to make him look even smaller...

(we do not talk enough about how all these jackets are a sort of alpha being shoulder plumping thing like when you make yourself look huge to scare off a mountain lion but that's 100% what this is)

IT MADE JACK SMILE yey he's allowed to feel useful! Pop is allowing him to go on a mission to rescue Dad who was looking for Papa when this all went down.

Grandpapa is not so pleased, because AUBobby has been measuring how useful Jack is and I feel like lil Nougat bab is going to do something mildly heroic for Cas or else get pasted for his ongoing character development for the season...

-

"He needs this, Bobby."

-

Dear LORD does he not quit? We don't even know his name? "Are you sure I can't get you anything... hot... or black?" FUck OFF

No wonder by the promo pic Cas looked so utterly done. This is exhaustingly annoying for him. Cas's personal hell is just irritating people. A line of Crowleys and Lucifers and this jerkwad chattering at him.

-

And yet Dean runs his mouth all the time and Cas is in luuuurve

-

Oh lordy are we really doing this coffee metaphor now? "Coffee has no effect on me" (but he once acquired the taste, and it was a core part of him being human and learning to human in the opening shot of 9x06 for him as his metaphor for how he was learning)

"me either *sluuuurp* not any more. But it's like saltwater taffy or infants. I just like the taste."

-

"I'm just being a good host like mother would have wanted"

Cas stops mid eyeroll to eyeroll HARDER at meeting ANOTHER demon with mommy issues. Like, please. Don't. I like Rowena now but can we NOT.

-

Party!Cas of Dabb era is my favourite iteration of Cas by a country mile.

-

"Why are you using me as bait?" "it's kind of what you're for"

Oh Cas. Now he's just the damsel in distress, which I guess is a step up from being an attack dog, but still isn't that great for the ego stroking about his role and use within the Winchester family, an ongoing source of stress for him, this reminds us.

-

Cas's faith in Sam is wonderful. like, as soon as douchmon says he needs something from Sam, Cas just SMIRKS like, OH BUDDY. BUDDDYYY. No, I'm not gonna say it. I'm just - "you think he'd make a deal with you?" I'm ... I don't laugh as a rule but inside? Hilarious.

-

"Somebody asked me what it was that I wanted" You know, I think Deanchael is INCITING people. he's not killing any of them, just using the revelation of his appearance to motivate them - moving Sister Jo to do what she wants, which is to re-organise Heaven with the ideas she had as a button pushing functionary... visiting world leaders and holy men, and this douche...

To what end, though? Chaos? This is a roundabout way to make a better world.

-

"Destroying, Drinking, Defiling, you know, the 3 Ds" they absolutely have posters up in Hell with this on for the newbies to learn.

-

We've seen Heaven's staffroom, I DEMAND to see the break room in Hell, with all its lurid Destiel smut doodled on the walls and so on

-

Anyway it's a hell of a question, pun intended, because demons have no real purpose, even the named baddies have largely been slaves to someone else's will (Lucifer or Crowley) and Crowley could not have answered that question from the start of season 6 through to the moment he chose to sacrifice himself... I don't think any of TFW 2.0 or Bunker Squad could answer it fully. Cas can't, and that's the question that's been bugging him since 9x06 -

EPHRAIM Shh-shh-shhh. It'll be over soon. I'll take the pain away.

CASTIEL I want to live.

EPHRAIM But as what, Castiel? As an angel? or a man?

and it's what his entire crisis in season 10 was over... Who ARE you Castiel? What do you WANT?

-

Dean wants a Beach Vacation Ending. He figured it out and as narrative punishment, he's Deanchael. No one else has sorted it out, though, but Sam got close - he had his pizza dream and was immediately punished with being eaten by vampires and resurrected by Lucifer and all that drama... Sam's work isn't done. Though his growth has taken a huge leap, now he has to figure out what he wants in this NEW setting, and we're only just MEETING Chief Sam in this iteration, so he's got a lot of work to do.

-

"I gave it a good think and I worked out exactly what I wanted. Everything."

Deanchael definitely is planning for this, so watch out buddy.

-

SAM DRIVING, MOM IN SHOTGUN

RED ALERT

-

Uhoh Sam's snapped because of the optimism Mary exudes. Yep, he really was nearly at the last straw in their earlier convo when he scoffed at her attempts to cheer him up.

Look, she's trying to mom you with no experience except adopting Jack. Work with her.

-

Sam is spiralling with the depression, this time all the bad things that could have happened to Dean and how they're never going to find him, throwing these horrible scenarios at Mary to stop her trying to comfort him.

-

"I know. I know he's out there, scared and alone." She sees lil 4 year old Dean. Because, I mean, that is the soul Dean bears to her when they have moments sometimes. And her optimism is a wall against thinking of her toddler in this scenario.

"I know. I know he might not come back. Never think I don't know that. But I can't - I have to think about the good, Sam. Because if I don't, I will drown in the bad." I wonder who that directly relates to who is currently driving this car.

I really hope this is a bit of vindication for Mary - or redemption to the eyes of the people who don't like her - that she does care, and she's spelling out her approach to all this. In the start of season 12 when she was trying to keep afloat she used a lot of optimism and furious paddling on the surface, because she has been doing that her whole life. When she was being raised a hunter, when she was a housewife with no clue what she was doing, a mom but he marriage beginning to fall apart... And then thrust into the present day, and it's 360 degrees of combat and loss and sadness and a ill-advised hook up with Ketch... Furious doggy paddling on the surface.

"For Dean's sake, I can't do that. We can't do that." And she shows that she is prioritising Dean, that she's driven and motivated to keep going FOR him.

Come on, give her a chance.

-

Nyooom.

-

Meanwhile in the Jack and Bobby truck, Jack is the one angsting and Bobby is the one driving.

Jack is one years old and not legally old enough to drive.

-

Bobby peptalks him with the reminder that when Jack had his grace he did hero things for these people, which is why he can ride shotgun, and even if he feels useless now, they'll have his back, that he has earned this squad even if he can't be as awesome as he used to.

-

Maggie is like, I'm getting a reaction shot... Am I going to develop feelings for Jack? That would be super weird, he's one years old. I hope no one is implying this even though I'm in a bunch of scenes getting character focus.

-

Eeeeeeee Sam trusts Mary with the demon killing knife. I am sure they don't call it Ruby's knife to her and he has never, ever told her about that time that thing happened with Ruby.

-

This fucker had his back turned for Sam to enter just so he could turn around dramatically. God he's repellent.

-

An extra was hired to pat Sam down. What a job.

-

"The shoulders. The hair! You are my Beyonce!" I mean, same. Except. Cas is Agent Beyonce so this fuckhead has totally misread this situation.

This gives Sam a moment to look over at Cas and Cas silently says, yes I know he's a total fuckhead, I've been dealing with this all day. I'm so sorry bro, can you just stab him so we can go home and follow a different lead. I don't even care what this one knows, I can't handle him another minute.

-

"I'm more embarrassed than I am hurt" I understand this to my core, and I'm so sorry, Cas.

-

"Kipling. Kip for short."

"Cool. Kip. I'm here." Sam being exactly as "fuck you" as I wanted towards Kip.

Sam is now standing with his head in an El Sol sign. TJW what are you up to bud?

-

Oh no Jack and Maggie got caught skulking. Sam and Cas have the same "my boy!" reaction when they see Cas.

Maggie is here too, you monsters.

But Kip has missed Mary and AUBobby

-

"It's just late capitalism, you understand" Yeah, and fuck you Kip.

-

How is Kip so irritating that he can make tapping a stool somehow the most obnoxious thing a man could do? He's WONDERFULLY well-cast. I love this actor. He's chewing scenery and it's incredible.

-

"What do you want?" Ow, Sam being twisted into asking the same thing Deanchael asked Kip

-

"Ass-modeus Kentucky Fried" listen you are still the worst but that drew a sympathetic smile and I hate it and I hate you.

-

Oh, Sam just Sammed something from that side glance, random demon side-eye. Oooh. Oooooooh.

But yeah, Kip asking for the "Crowley Deal" as if it's a package that can be bought from the Winchesters, and not something that Crowley wormed his way into via much back and forth power plays and drama. The Winchester have always had a back and forth with Hell, and since Crowley there have been a lot of demons, like Bart, trying to figure out what exactly it WAS that they all had. But someone has to be in charge, and the Winchesters are the top dog destined hunters with their fingers  in all the world-saving pies, so clashes come naturally. Approaching them like this, first Bart, now this douchenozzle, is meta, presumptuous, overstepping what builds naturally... An attempt to leapfrog to the end where the equilibrium is established.

But Crowley had time to build a long game. These new pretenders are working in a world where the Winchesters' actions have devastated Heaven and Hell alike, and are, like Mary, just trying to keep afloat on the whole thing.

"We never gave Crowley that deal." Because yes, that's how it seemed to play out, and from outsider eyes that's how it may have looked... But each and every interaction came about naturally through the plot, there was no wrangling it. That's just how the Winchesters and Crowley ended up.

And that hole can't be filled by someone just leaping into the chair and asking for it.

Though it is nice if Motown Meats is the new seat of Hell on Earth instead of the outdated exterior asylum interior castle dungeon look Crowley set up.

-

"You're no Crowley. I know that. So do they." I think that was what Sam Sammed out of the demons, and also true, and ALSO is this the boyking accidentally exerting himself, knowing what's good for Hell? I always get a lil tingle in my thumbs when Sam gets too involved in knowing what's up with Hell.

-

Holy shit Kipling was a Mongolian warlord who rode with Genghis Khan in life. PLEASE survive this episode, I want to hate you all season. PLEAAAASE I BEG YOU.

-

Oh my god this insecure whinging asshole, chowing down on the scenery like there's no tomorrow. "I'D EAT YOUR HEART" *turns to weepy and quiet* "before I show you who I really am..."

This is Eddie Redmayne in Jupiter Ascending levels of scenery eating. He's gonna pick up a barstool and take a bite out of it now.

-

Sam is doing this all unarmed, which is something to remember, because this is the fucker who talked his way into killing the Alpha Vamp while MOSTLY unarmed for a majority of that chat.

-

Sam Fucking Winchester.

-

AUBOBBY AND RUFUS!!!!

Also mary.

-

But AUBobby gets a slow mo for Rufus shooting demons.

-

HOLY SHIT MARY'S SLOW MO

I am pregnant

-

MARY THROWING SAM THE KNIFE

-

TJW was like this fight is too fast, my guy. We need to slow it down.  You're so good at your job no one's gonna see what happened unless we go slow mo.

he and the fight guy high five

-

"Aw, balls."

Hey, Nougat tried. He's got a squishy hero centre.

Looks like he weighs nothing and now he's human he goes down in one punch. Owie.

-

"Here take this. You know how to use it?" "Uh! Stab them with the pointy end!?" "pretty much"

Maggie you precious girl why are you HERE. Why is Soups On or Gnarly Gun Guy not here?

-

Cas you fucking damsel in distress

-

Fight guy is like "uuuuh do I have to"

Misha is like "I'm good here, tbh"

-

SAM FUCKING WINCHESTER

(Aw, Kip's dead, he was fun)

-

"ENOUGH"

YES SIR

-

"There will be NO NEW KING OF HELL"

You are gonna get demon minions like fucking ducklings you ass

-

"Not ever. And if anyone wants the job, you can come through me" Sam is technically immortal so long as Rowena is alive and vice versa you know. Also, how long is he planning on defending Hell? Ever?

I'm stalling from how much I have to scream about how badass Sam was throwing down that declaration that he's now essentially the trial a pretender to the throne has to pass to take the job.

Because if I was a demon... FUCK NO would I want to tangle with this fucker.

-

Sam's file, updated: Current King Of Hell. Will Kill You. AVOID.

-

Sam is fucking terrifying. I love it. He scared demons out of their meatsuits. Sam walking into a room is now a reason to eject and abort mission. God. This guy.

-

Remember in season 1 when demons were scary? Oo er this isn't our sort of thing... halp.

Now Sam looks them in the eye and is like, fuck off. I'm scarier than any of you.

-

"That's what I thought"

Cas is literally giving you the reverse look of in 4x16 when you marched in and fried Alastair's brain.

-

SAM GOT A NEW SHIRT thank god.

I should amend: he did all this wearing blue plaid with orange stripes.

Sam Fucking Winchester.

The BMoL definitely didn't have the right birth certificate because that's his legal middle name.

-

Sam n Caaaaas my GUYS. I hope this is the 10x01 convo but, like, not. Flip flip flip those pancakes, Dabb my guy.

-

Cas, hon, you're still so beat up you have blood trails coming out of your nose. There's not really caring about your meatsuit because it heals eventually, but there's also washing your fucking face, because Sam's had time to change his shirt and get a beer so what were you doing?

-

Probably staring at a picture of Dean on his phone and sighing.

-

Anyway he's here to ask how Sam is, rather than care about himself. Symbolism.

"I've been better. And worse." Worse is 10x01.

Or 4x10's flashbacks. For sure those are the worstest.

Though, this time you are the king of hell and you're wearing a dark shirt and I don't think you have thought this through.

-

The most well-meaning accidental king of hell ever.

-

Sam and Cas share the "to find Dean I'd do anything" look. Be CAREFUL. Cas is literally choosing to wear hubris on his face because he feels bad about his fuck up with going to Kip.

-

Mary! Casual Mary chilling in the kitchen!!

Although, with everyone in the bunker, these rooms are taking on different meanings. The people are chasing out the heavy shadows and ghosts of all the oppressive silences Sam and Dean have filled these corners with.

-

Aw it's Mary and AUBobby. I was half-hoping we'd have her giving beer to Jack, but I guess we need to set up the forward momentum on their relationship for this season.

"Not bad today, old man." "you too, Sunshine."

You do realise that Mary is sitting in the exact same spot as where Dean was when he called Cas "Sunshine" You do know that right I mean you KNOW? This is TJW, he knows. He's a Destiel Shipper of the highest order.

-

Cas pops in on Jack, staring at his busted up face in a mirror, now filling more Winchester angst tropes to make up for lost time. "I'm fine," he says without being asked.  Because 10x01 or 10x02 was where Cas defined "fine" for Hannah and explained to her it's what humans say when things are really not fine but they can't admit it.

-

"You did well." "All I did was get punched. In the face."

I love snarky teen Jack.

"To be fair, we all got punched in the face," Cas says, still covered in hubris.

He has a POINT. He has full right to pull the "I should feel more useless than you" card on Jack.

-

Jack doing the "i'm useless" thing that Cas had to go through when he lost his grace, and Jack was allowed to stay in the Bunker. Is this how Cas would have felt had he not been kicked out?

-

Jack says Michael's out there and he still feels responsible to stop him. There's a very, very very very ver very weird Hamlet vibe from Jack, being forced into a position of emotional responsibility to kill his uncle, but Cas is his once dead now back and not a ghost father, and Jack couldn't kill Michael and so Dean got possessed... I mean, it's not a neat overlay, but Jack wants to kill an uncle, an AUncle, and I feel like in terms of uncle-killing narratives, AU Michael making off with Dean fits about as well to Hamlet's uncle marrying his mom as we're gonna get... I'd love to see how this shapes out because these family narratives since season 11 are becoming deeply shakespearean in the amount of nonsense going on. This sort of supernatural drama is a modern world way to have this kind of heightened emotion and the stakes you find in Shakespearean tragedies, and to force the sorts of reflection on the world and self... I really really dig it. Watching season 13 yesterday really hit me with this feeling all over and I'm delighted that Jack has this arc because I'm so amused/interested to see where this weirdo Hamlet parallel goes for him.

-

"I don't have anything." "Oh Jack" thanks Cas that's what I said out loud "you have me. You have all of us. You have your family." *SHOULDER GRASP*

No hug. Fuck off Cas, with your reassuring shoulder grasps. I know that's the language you've been taught but Dabb era is hug era and you suck.

-

I love that with all of Sam and Mary's doubt and Jack's lack of self worth, it's down to CAS. CASTIEL. CASTIEL WINCHESTER. CASTIEL FUCKING WINCHESTER. PARTY!CAS. to give the actual pep talk of the episode which has ANY conviction behind it. Cas has been fuelled with something MAGNIFICENT since the Empty, and he's turned it up to 11 for Jack here :')

-

Jack makes the smallest smile, then turns back to his mirror.

-

Sam opening the door to his bedroom, framed in darkness. 10x01 parallels again - this shot as well as the demon dean one were repeated a few times through the 3 episode arc, and the demon dean one became iconic but Sam did it too, to Dean's room. Now he goes into his own... empties his pockets... he still has the fucking engraved money clip from Tall Tales because Gabriel is not only not dead but telling this entire story for us... He has the phone, that's off, because Dean is not there, not communicating with him, blah blah. And he has the keys to the Impala. Because he's the chief.

Well, the King of Hell. Damn, it took 14 years to get him there. Azazel is fucking spinning in his grave.

-

Ooh, phonecall! Is it Deanchael? "What do you want?"

Nope, it's Sister Jo! :D She's been standing there ALL NIGHT weighing her options and working out what she wants.

SPIN THAT CHAOS, DEANCHAEL.

-

Deanchael approaches a vampire, and it's that purity of Purgatory, that just wanna eat that fuelled so much of the badass stuff in season 7 with the Leviathan, everything Dean's struggled with when it comes to the black and white world of killing monsters no problem that dates back to Gordon in 2x03, that draws Deanchael to them. Because this is Dean's safe space with Benny, a real relationship based on a bond forged in pure, kill or be killed, eat or be eaten purgatory. Deanchael has the same inner machinery as Dean, because Michael is the worst version of Dean, engineered to be Dean but without love. Dean as a monster. And so it all leads here... D:

-

Well this will be fun :D

[goodbyekillingharmony]

What Are You  Feeling? ~ Irumatsu - Femslash Feb

a.n it’s femslash feb and you bet your ass that this worthless gay would write some epic lesbos. im still finalizing the ship list, but in the meantime, enjoy my favorite wlw ship in the entire dr franchise as a starter ;)

Sometimes all you need is a little push. We can miss out on events that can drastically alter our future, just by not taking action. However, it does not always begin as something that seems life-changing. The beginning, no matter how small it may seem at first, always is the catalyst for something new.

“You can go on ahead, Shuichi! Let me just finish eating first.”

“A-Alright. Call me if you need anything.”

After some hesitation, Shuichi left the dining hall, waving at Kaede who started waving back and watched as he left the area. She looked back around the hall and spotted that the dining area was nearly empty, save from one Miu Iruma, Ultimate Inventor. She averted her eyes away from her meal, and onto the other blonde female. Kaede, being as observant as she his, noticed little nuances about Miu’s appearance that were hard to detect from only a simple glance.

Her hands were always covered with something: paint, oil, glue, you name it. Her eyes always seemed to perk up whenever she tested her inventions, almost like a child in a candy store. And the ever-constant look of exhaustion present on her face, especially her eyes since they almost always had bags under them.

Akamatsu can admit, she was concerned for Miu, more so than she usually is for her other classmates, except maybe Shuichi. Even though Iruma seemed to hate the pianists guts, there was this curiosity that she couldn’t shake off regarding the inventor.

This finally seemed like Kaede’s chance to get her questions answered about Iruma. She was not going to let this opportunity slip by.

She slapped one of her cheeks and got up to sit next to Miu, however, Miu was quick to notice and, before long, started laughing.

“Woa, Kaediot! I didn’t know you had a crush on me! You’re totally fucking thirsty!”

“What the hell gave you that idea?”

“E-Eeee! I-I just noticed t-that you were looking at me, a-and…”

Miu’s demeanor changed in what seemed like a millisecond. The girl was now trembling as tears threatened to escape her eyes. Kaede immediately regretted her actions as she rushed over to Miu to apologise.

“S-Shit! Miu! I-I didn’t mean to upset you! I-I’m sorry!”

“What the fuck, Bakamatsu! Y-You think I’m going to forgive you just like that?”

“N-No, but I-”

“I don’t need apologies from s-some t-trashy skank who always keeps her boytoy on a leash!”

This was going to be harder than first anticipated, Akamatsu thought. Miu’s personality was a little too much for Kaede, and now, it was definitely going to be a bigger challenge. However, she took in a deep breath and decided to avoid being direct for now and make due with what she can now at the moment.

“A-anyway… How’s you day been so far?”

“What?! You’re not even going to respond?!”

Kaede sighed and closed her eyes. She figured Miu hated being ignored and would respond eventually. The hall was completely silent for a few seconds, before Kaede’s hypothesis was proven correct. Iruma broke the silence, however, her voice was much less aggressive and Akamatsu could swear she heard fear in the girl’s voice.

“I-It’s been alright…Didn’t really get a lot of sleep last night though. This fucking invention kept fucking up and I ended up having to go to the warehouse to get extra supplies.”

“Ah! Were you the one we saw at the warehouse yesterday then?”

Akamatsu recalled in her memory that when her and Shuichi were exploring the academy, they saw a figure near the warehouse entrance, seemingly snooping around quite stealthy. At least, until Kaede caught a glimpse.

“I-I uhm…”

Miu’s face became even paler as she was starting to fidget with her fingers. If she seemed terrified a minute ago, now she looks like she's a death row inmate who has to speak her final words.

“M-Miu! T-That was really dangerous! What if someone tried to attack you?”

“E-Ehh…?! P-Pfft… I'd just a-attack them back…!”

“Yeah, right! M-Miu… You could have actually gotten yourself seriously hurt. Everyone is incredibly tense right now and who knows what would have happened if someone walking by became incredibly suspicious.”

“You're not my fucking mom, you whore! I-I could have handled myself easy!”

Kaede, once again, closed her eyes. The intent, this time, was different. She couldn't make heads or tails about Miu's behavior. No matter how much she tried to figure the girl out, she would completely flip flop her personality to one that was more overwhelming than the last.

…

No! She was going to try and get closer to Miu, no matter how hard she has to try. If she wants to escape this academy, then she needs to get everyone on board.

With new found confidence, Akamatsu opened her eyes with a fire in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around the inventor, holding her in an embrace. Needless to say, Iruma was a tad concerned.

“A whore? Me? Hah, nice try!”

“W-What the fuck, Bakamatsu…! L-Let go of me, you fucking-- u-uhh…”

“Lesbian? I know!”

“What the hell are you trying to pull…?! Are you coming onto me or what?”

“Nah. I just wanted to ask you a question and I didn't know how else to get your attention.”

“If you wanted to ask me a fucking question, why didn't you say so earlier?!”

“Because I didn't know if you'd even talk to me.”

“W-Whatever… Let go of me and then I'll answer whatever the fuck you wanted to ask me.”

This was Kaede's chance. This one question.

((“Don't blow it, Akamatsu… Let's get our answers!”))

Kaede took in a deep breath and spoke with a shaky voice, trying to formulate the question in a way that wouldn't potentially hurt Miu.

“I-I was just wondering w-why you don't sleep that much…? L-Like I know you work on your inventions, but is there some other reason…?”

She was expecting a comeback. Or some kind of insult. Instead, Miu’s face dimmed as she sharply inhaled and folded her hands as she looked at Akamatsu and answered, her voice completely stern and serious.

“I don't know why you care so much, Kaediot. But, it's nightmares.”

“N-Nightmares…?”

“I want to get out of here, y'know. And with the threat of being killed… W-Who the fuck wouldn't be d-desperate?!”

“M-Miu…”

“You have your little dog to follow you around all the damn time while I got no one. I'm used to it honestly. But it sure fucking sucks, doesn't it?”

“M-Miu… I had no idea.”

“Nobody does. I mean, I still don't know how you can trust an-”

“If you want, we can try to become friends and escape this place together.”

“K-Kaediot…”

“I can tell you're scared and I feel bad for not noticing until now. But, I promise I can stay by your side as long as want! And we'll escape this place, all of us! Together!”

“Y-You won't leave me, right?”

“Mhm, nope! I believe in you, Miu! I believe that you're an amazing person and you definitely deserve to escape! So, I'll stay by your side. With me, with Shuichi, with everyone!”

“H-How can you be so sure?! W-What if you-?”

“I promise nothing bad will happen to me, Miu. And I won't let anything bad happen to you! S-So, what do you say?”

“You're too goddamn naive for your own good, Kaede. B-But fine, if it makes you feel safe, I guess I could go along with it.”

“That's all I needed to hear!”

The two girls started to talk about the things they'd do after escaping the academy. Their hopes and aspirations. And Miu seemed to enjoy herself for once.

She was happy.

She fell asleep easy tonight, for the first time in what seemed like eternity.

All thanks to Kaede.

[yandereshit]

Izaya x Reader: salad. [Durarara]

So! A story I wrote in 2k15 and translated to english... well, today. The translation may be a bit weird since I’m not used to doing these, but... well, yes. Here we go lololol have fun with this weird ass shit.

Evening ritual always looked the same. The very moment the night fell upon the city – which happened quite late during summer – you showered and, wearing your cute pink pajamas, you took out the cucumber-meat salad from the fridge and pouring its small amount into a special, porcelain bowl and putting a spoon inside as well, using the lack of interest from your parents’ side, you quietly left the flat, wearing your plushy flip-flops to stay warm and quiet at once.

Luckily, no neighbor has seen you in this weird state. This time your hair was still wet, which made you even more willing to stay unnoticed. You went up the six-floor building and opened the roof’s door. According to the ritual, you’ll sit at the edge of the roof and, staring at the bright, night city, eat the heavenly gift as known as your mommy’s salad.

The door creaked when you stepped outside. The wind started to move chaotically, unwittingly drying your hair. You shook your head, trying to move the strands aside to clear your sight, because the wind hit you from behind, covering your face with the mess of hair. And when you finally managed to do so… well.

“Huh? You’re not Magenta-san.”

Eeeeh...?

You looked up and stared at the silhouette standing a few meters away and staring back at you with concern on his face.

Magenta, Magenta, Magenta... Um…

“It’s shade of pink…?” you guessed, reminding yourself of the hours spent in Ikea on choosing the right color for the curtains.

The silhouette blinked, a bit disoriented. He scanned over your body and put his hands in the pockets of his jacket, tilting his head to the side with a smile and apparently waiting for what YOU were about to do.

“I… u-um...” you stuttered, because the man was standing in your way to your favorite spot on the roof. “I wanted to eat only...” you muttered and, with your face red from embarrassment (wind, why are you not covering my face NOW?!) you circled around the person and sat with crossed legs at the edge of the roof, about to start your meal.

There was a silence. You took a bit of the salad on the spoon, stared at it and sighed deeply, trying to suppress the will to look around at the stranger. You probably should ask him what he’s doing here. But right now, you definitely preferred to take care of the salad and assume… that you’ll keep ignoring him till he goes away. The taste of your favorite meal was so tempting that you really wanted to believe it’ll just work.

One way or another, you lived here since forever. Officially, no one was allowed to enter the roof. And this stranger definitely wasn’t a neighbor since you’ve never seen him before.

You pressed your lips together, putting the spoon in the bowl and carefully taking the phone out from your pocket. You raised it to your eyes’ level to use the reflection to see the other person behind you.

But as it seemed, the person disappeared from your sight. You shrugged, putting your phone aside and finally deciding to take care of the salad.

“You have a cute dog” you heard suddenly right behind yourself and jumped (quite comically, considering you were sitting), letting go of the spoon and miraculously not losing the bowl as well. The spoon screamed drastically and a few seconds later, landed as a bloody stain on the pavement dozens of meters lower. Or maybe you just imagined that. Either way, you lost it.

“Oh dang it” you muttered, standing up and turning around, only to notice that SOMEONE barely a meter further stared at the screen of a phone. You glanced at the spot next to yourself. And yes, it was YOUR phone. You had the photo of your dog on your lock screen.

Automatically, you reached in the thief’s direction, he though, not even looking up, spun around, whirling away from your grasp. It forced you to use more strength and as a result, you lost your balance. And before you managed to stop, both you and the salad’s bowl flied in the floor’s direction.

However, unlike you, the bowl never met the ground. But a few moments later you realized in terror that the stranger has two hostages now. And – by the way – that the roof is quite dirty and you’ll have to take a shower again.

“Give back my salad!” you yelled in annoyance. Well, priorities differ. The stranger snorted and moved away a bit more, extending the hand with the phone in your direction. You hesitantly took it and put in the pocket, but it was obviously not enough. You wanted your salad!

In the meanwhile, the man moved aside and started eating the salad with his fingers.

You screamed in despair, feeling the anger boil inside of you. No one. Is. Allowed. To. Touch. Your. Salad.

You raised your fist in attempt to hit the man’s face. At that moment, the food lost its value. The revenge was what you craved for. It was a fight for honor.

Unfortunately, the man dodged. You tried to hit him a few more times, then kick, you generally tried everything you could. And he – barely amused – without hurry dodged all your attacks, making sure that nothing would happen to the salad and (if that was not enough) he even found time to keep eating it. At least he was aware what kind of treasure he’s holding!

Eventually, you let out a weird, frustrated growl and grasped his jacket with both hands, putting all your strength in not letting go. But he didn’t even try to break free.

“And what now?” he asked with a childish smile on his face, watching every single feature of your silhouette. Ah well. Your hands were busy. The first thing you thought of was kicking him, but he quickly made you unable to do so, standing on your toes. Your flip flops had no chance in comparison to normal shoes so an attempt to break free turned futile.

You pressed your lips together, thinking of literally ANY possibility to rub that annoying smile off his face. And finally, when the man probably thought you’re about to give up… you pulled him to yourself and with all the strength left, bit into his neck

He screamed, letting go of the bowl which shattered on the ground.

"O-oi, it hurts! ヘ（。□°）ヘ", he whimpered, trying to push you off himself. But it made him only hurt more, because you bit into him like some tick. He closed his eyes tightly, focusing on bearing the pain.

Suddenly, you felt a weird, metallic taste. Not fitting to the bitter taste of his cologne you were feeling for the few seconds till now. You pulled your teeth out of his neck, staring in disbelief at the slightly bleeding wound on your victim’s neck.

“Finally...” the “victim” muttered, flopping onto the ground.

“Um...” you whimpered, covering your mouth with your hand. You licked over your lips, and then… “Oh my God! I will catch something!” you yelled, spatting out as much of your saliva as you could. You started to cough in despair.

The man glared at you, carefully touching the wound. The skin in that place was weirdly jelly in touch. He stared at you for some time, clearly not willing to interrupt.

You in the meanwhile, hardly got yourself together and finally stared at him angrily.

“Youuu...”

“You’re not done yet?!” he asked in panic, covering his neck with hands.

“Look at what you’ve done!” you yelled, pointing the shattered bowl and your dead salad around it. “You killed it!”

“You bit me!” he noticed, standing up and brushing the dust off his trausers.

“I-it was in self-defense!” you announced. “And because you stole it from me! You’re the guilty one!

He sighed, rolling his eyes, which for some reason pissed you off even more. You gathered the rest of your despair and you were about to throw yourself at him once again… when something glistened in front of your eyes and stopped by your neck,  informing you that any attempt to move will end tragically. Your heart stopped for a short second and you held your breath, as if fearing that any uncontrolled movement can cause something you pretty much didn’t want to happen. You felt a slight pressure and backed away in panic, tripping and landing back on the ground.

“Maybe I should return the favor, vamp?” he suggested enthusiastically (which seemed, in your opinion, pretty creepy), tilting his head so that you could see the wound on his neck. And it looked pretty ugly. The scar would probably stay there for a few weeks or even months...

He stared at you for a few moments, analyzing the emotions appearing on your face. Shock, then confusion, still lasting anger mixed with fear for your life. The man you just really painfully bit stood in front of you with a blade pointing at your throat, ready to end your life with a short movement. Every blow of the wind made you feel as if he’s already done so.

Not a comfortable situation.

You stared at him as well. He looked like some creepypasta sociopath. Actually, he looked like one from the very beginning. His dark eyes moved slowly along your silhouette, analyzing every single piece of your body. He seemed to seep through you with his stare, yet his face stayed firm. His arrogant smirk distracted you.

Suddenly, he put the knife in the pocket of his jacket and stepped back, not looking away from your face.

He chuckled.

“There, you don’t have to be scared… that much. I’m glad I could see that many of your emotions in such a short amount of time. They were really entertaining.” He laughed and turned around, moving away as if he couldn’t care less about what you were about to do. “And now excuse me, there’s one more person I need to play with today.”

You let out an annoyed grumble and got up, eventually ignoring him and going to the building’s door. Then finally it got to you, how late, cold and windy it became in the meanwhile.

“Ah, one more thing” the man added suddenly, just before you closed the door behind yourself. “Next time, I’d like to also see you laugh.”

As if on call, you laughed.

Hysterically.

You shut the door behind yourself and went back to your flat. You entered the kitchen, took out the whole pot of the salad and, reaching for a new spoon, decided to take all the accumulated anger out on your digestive system.

[bookcub]

Wil and Kvothe

So I was thinking about Wil and Kvothe and how Wil points out that Kvothe’s eyes change color when his mood changes. You know who else points that out? Denna. His love interest. So I decided this makes Wil a love interest. So here’s some headcanons about Wil and Kvothe’s romantic relationship 

Wil is the one who realizes his feelings for Kvothe first 

The Cealdish are more tolerant of same gender relationships 

And as always liked men, but no one enough to get involved with 

This changes with Kvothe 

He notices how he truly feels about Kvothe when they get the news of his ship sinking and thinks he’s dead

One of the reasons he goes back home is to come to terms with losing his best friend, who he is also in love with. 

So when they are both back at the University, Wil is thrilled 

But of course Kvothe is still hung up on Denna 

So Wil tries to move on 

But when inevitably Kvothe and Denna get together and then break up, Wil becomes a rebound for Kvothe 

Like, a friends with benefits thing 

And Wil is like this is my chance 

And Kvothe is like, this is a one time thing 

(sure, babe) 

Wil told Sim the next morning after it happened 

And Sim is like, eeee, so cute, don’t screw this up 

So he and Fela keep bringing Wil and Kvothe on these outings, you know, under the guise, but they are actually double dates

And suddenly Kvothe doesn’t have time for dates because he’s actually low key dating Wil 

And he wants to spend all his time with Wil 

And Wil is like, putting his arm around Kvothe all the time

And sits next to him whenever they are out 

And Wil is like, I’m gonna wait until he figures out I like him and he likes me 

Also, Wil calls him all sort of cute names in Cealdish, which because it’s slang, Kvothe doesn’t understand (think like French, where mon petit chou translates into my little cabbage, so Kvothe is like so confused) 

Kvothe finally wraps his head around the whole situation when Wil openly admires a guy 

And Kvothe is like, no I’m the only guy Wil can like 

Which blows his mind 

Next day after hanging out with Auri he decides to make a move 

So he gives a long speech to Wil about how he is his best friend but now wants to be in an exclusive romantic relationship 

And Wil was all like, I know, let’s get dinner with Sim and Fela and then go home together 

And Kvothe realizes he has been wooed 

So he gets even more dewy eyed for Wil 

And anyways, that’s how Doors of Stone ends and it turns out the whole Kote thing and what caused him to be Kote was all a dream 

And Wil and Kvothe have been married for 7 years and are trying to adopt currently. 

[daisymondays]

Hi Gracie! 13 (three favourite characters to write) and 10 (a theme that keeps coming up in your writing) for the ask please! I love reading about your wonderful writing! 💕

Eeee thankyou so much my lovely

3. Three Favourite Characters to Write

Number one is hands down Bucky Barnes by a landslide, and i thought originally this would be the AU version of him only, but I’m currently writing him in canon and having a great time with it. I’m not sure I’d be able to write pure Post-Winter Solider Bucky, but the Infinity War Bucky who is more settled is really great to write. I think he’s one of my favourites to write as I think he’s so interesting, he’s got so many layers as a character as we’ve seen so many sides to him. There’s his pre-War persona where he appears confident, charming, well-liked and easy going, but I also think there’s a lot of insecurity humming underneath the surface but he hides it well. Also, of course since Bucky Barnes is a big queer, I think that adds a lot of layers to his canon self and the way he’d deal with it. Then there’s War Bucky who is starting to unearth some very ugly aspects of his personality, and realise just how far he’s willing to cross the line when he thinks it’s the necessary thing to do -- and to protect Steve. I love brutal Bucky who does the dirty work. And who is utterly terrified of this part of him, and if he can still be a good person while all this is going on. Then there’s Winter Solider Bucky and Post Winter Solider Bucky and how he can reconcile all this and understand who he was then and is now. Up until now I haven’t had the biggest chance to explore all this but i am loving that about this multi-verse fic i’m writing. And while i do love all this about writing that Bucky, gotta say the reason he’s my fave is for his AU personality which is fun, bright, charming and so deeply caring, but again these insecurities hover under the surface and the secrecy he can carry around and the emotional weight he’ll bare if it eases his friends burden. Also one thing I really want to explore is I really think Bucky has some ugly sides to his personality, the charmingness that he can exploit, a carelessness at times, and the fact he’s very bright and brutal means that when he makes a killing blow, either verbally or with a weapon, it makes a mark. Anyway huge rambling about Bucky aside, i love writing him!! he’s swell

Writing anyone in their early 20s in modern day is a blast for me, i love being able to play up that banter and slang and just emotional confusion at life (self insert much)

Also a huge fan of writing Draco, again I find him interesting with the reconliling his past with who he wants to be now. Though of course very different, seeing as Draco got himself into his mess a lot more than Bucky did, though they both do deal with guilt and having people blame them for situations that were beyond their control in the end. Draco again, is to me, very clever and prideful, and i think very interesting to explore. I have a lot of fun with mixing my own sense of humour onto his sharpness, and not smoothing out his edges but moulding them into someone who has experienced a lot of growth in life. and is now worth knowing and liking, but still has to deal with their past constantly. The way he hides his emotions is also fun to explore, and back when i was first stressing about writing Draco @carpemermaidtales said to me that to write Draco all i’ve got to remember is that whatever he’s thinking, he’ll say the opposite and i think thats very true, and makes for a very fun character voice and a lot of exploration to be had

Steve and Harry I can’t actually say are up there, I enjoy writing Harry, and I loved writing Steve in KAFO but I’m not totally comfortable with them. I relate to them both a lot, and they’re two of my fave fictional characters but their voices are very precise and nuanced -- like wow i could go on and on and on about the nuances of Steve, and his pride and moral compass and intelligence, and just everything, but i think its all such a fine line that it is deffo harder to write. Also both of them have such a subtle and precise sass that i often feel i may not do them justice, and find it easier to stick to the more blatant humour I can give someone like Bucky for example

So actually, my third favourite character to write is one of my original ones!! who i am utterly in love with, like this little fucker popped into my head fully formed in a way no original character ever has for me, and I love him. He’s a detective in an urban fantasy verse and is just such a little shit, and i need to start writing it again as i love him. A lot. And could squeal about him all day ahaha

XXX

Noah groans, dropping down into his seat and summoning the first folder to him with a flick of his fingers.

“I got you coffee,” Carol says, not looking up.

“You’re the best person in this place.” Noah means it. He’s not sure what he’d do without Carol most days. She’s the person he trusts to have his back, and more than that they’ve become good friends in the years they’ve worked their ways up the ranks together. He balances the folder on his lap and leans forward to pick up his usual mug, red with a sleeping dog on. There’s a chip in the handle and it ruins Noah’s morning if anyone else picks it up.

“How’s your arse?” Carol asks.

“Delightfully perky. I think those squats are paying off.”

Carol rolls her eyes and Noah grins back. “I meant after being reamed by Morgan.”

“Kinky.”

She laughs. “I’ll take it it’s sore then.”

Noah doesn’t want to discuss the dressing down he’s received from the Special Agent already. He’s not even been here half an hour. He’ll bemoan his situation later with a pint in his hand.

He takes a sip of his coffee before saying, “The coffee’s cold.”

“Really sore then.”

The problem is Carol knows him too well, she see’s right through his — admittedly pathetic — attempts at deflection.

“And badly made,” he adds. “I’m going to need some actual caffeine during lunch.”

“You can say you want Hot Shots, I don’t judge you anymore.”

“You never stop judging me.”

Carol taps her pen and smiles. “True.”

He’s an idiot aka i love him and need to get back to writing this !!!

10. Answered (badly) Here

FanFic Asks

[vcg73]

Kadam Fic: Greetings From Las Vegas

Decided I should probably answer at least one or two of the Kadam Week prompts before too much time passed.  :)

The prompt was this one   The story is pure fluffy fluff.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Come on, come on . . . just one more little crossbones . . .   Eeee . . . YES!  Oh my gosh! Come to papa, you lovely little doubloons!”

Adam grinned at Kurt, who was bouncing in his chair and pumping both fists. He leaned over to look at his boyfriend’s blinking, clanging slot machine and his eyes opened wide with surprise. “Oh my goodness. Kurt, you’ve just made $500 on a single spin!  If I’d known you would be so lucky, I’d have brought you to Vegas ages ago.”

Bouncing on his red leather bar-style chair, Kurt pondered the cartoon pirate that had just popped up daring him to spin again and double his winnings. He had been slightly reluctant to try the ‘Pirate Booty’ slot machine at first, a little turned off by the ‘buxom wench’ decorating it, but since Adam was already playing the Haunted House game next to it, he had decided to give it a whirl. Much to his delight, the machine had proved to be a hot one. He had built his original twenty dollar investment into nearly six hundred dollars over the course of an hour. He had been making small steady gains until he finally got a chance at a bonus round.

Adam had not done as well with his own machine, but he had managed to make a slim profit, and he had picked up a hundred dollars playing blackjack that morning so he had no complaints.  Watching Kurt’s growing delight over an amazing streak of beginner’s luck had him enjoying their shared casino experience even more.

Kurt poised his finger over the Spin button, bit his lip, glanced at Adam, and abruptly changed his mind and punched Cash Out instead. “I just can’t,” he explained. “It’s really tempting, but I feel like all the littler wins were just leading up to this one, and I would be so disappointed in myself if I pushed my luck and lost everything.”

“A wise decision,” Adam agreed, pleased to see that Kurt’s sensible side had not been overridden by the lure of easy money. “I seem to be at an impasse with this machine. I’ve been winning and losing the same five dollars for the last thirty minutes, so I suggest we try something different. Would you like to play another game, or should we go somewhere else for a while?”

Eyes shining, Kurt replied, “I didn’t actually expect to win any money on this trip. I brought along the cash from my tips, figuring I could stand to lose that much, but instead I’ve been winning like crazy!  And since I did win, I think we should let ourselves be frivolous for once, and blow some of it on something completely fun and Vegasy.”

Adam laughed. “An excellent idea, and I agree. I also assumed we’d do no more than break even, so I’ve been careful to insure that my own funds would still stretch far enough to cover our hotel room and meals.”

“I’d be happy to share the costs,” Kurt reminded him. “Don’t forget, you covered the flight too.”

Shaking his head at Kurt’s offer, he said, “No, no, darling. I don’t want you to do that. As I told you when I booked the flight, I had a few air miles I needed to use up before they expired, and this is my gift to you. I won’t have you paying your own way on your birthday. I’ve got us.” 

“All right, I won’t push. Just know that the offer stands if you do need help. ”  Kurt sighed happily. “I still can’t believe you overheard me telling Rachel that I’ve always wanted to see Las Vegas, and saved up your money and those air miles that I know you were going to use to visit home, just so you could bring me here for my birthday.”

Adam shrugged, as if the sacrifice had been nothing at all. “Don’t think I had enough to reach Heathrow, and mum and dad are going to be in Madrid for a combined medical conference and couples retreat this summer, so they wouldn’t be disappointed if I skipped. Besides, my gesture wasn’t entirely selfless. I’d been longed for a holiday with just the two of us.”  

“Me too, just don’t even try to tell me this isn’t amazing,” Kurt said, giving his hand a squeeze. “Because it is, and so are you.” 

He did not say it out loud, but the grandness of the gift itself meant less to him than the knowledge that Adam must have spent months planning and budgeting just for the joy of giving it. His last boyfriend had loved making grand gestures, but they had largely been empty spectacles designed to make Blaine look good, and deflect any anger or hurt that might justifiably be aimed at him. Adam had no such ulterior motive. He was caring and thoughtful to everyone, and he hadn’t even told anyone what he was planning until it came time to book the airline tickets, and then he had confessed his plan in time to make sure that going to Vegas was something that Kurt actually wanted to do. 

Adam gave him a quick peck on the cheek and brushed away the admiration with a bright smile and a cheery, “All right then, big spender. If you’re going to treat us to a night on the town, what shall we do with it?  Sky-high roller coasters, Cirque du Soleil, a comedy act, the wax museum, Thundah From Down Undah...”

He hitched his eyebrows as he spoke the final suggestion in an exaggerated Aussie accent, clearly joking, and something about it brought out a streak of mischief in Kurt. “Oooh! That sounds fun!  Let’s do that!”

Adam blinked. “Darling, that’s  . . . you do know it’s a male strip show?”

“Of course I do. I saw their poster in the lobby of our hotel. They’re all sewper hawt , and Rachel will be so jealous, and I can’t wait to tell everyone back home! Can we, Adam? Can we, can we, please?”

Adam had been staring at him blankly, looking as if he was not quite sure he was hearing right. But when Kurt began play-begging, he laughed. “For a moment you had me going, love. I assume you are joking, but if I’m wrong and you really do want to go and see what those fellows are packing down under, we can absolutely do that.”

For a split second Kurt was tempted to accept, suspecting that it would be fun to watch Adam get all overheated and squirmy at the sight of a dozen nearly naked Aussie hunks, but then he laughed. “Who am I kidding? The minute some oiled-up beefcake started thrusting his g-string at us, I’d be so embarrassed I’d spend the rest of the show hiding my face in your shoulder.”

“Doesn’t sound so bad,” Adam said with a fond smile.

“No,” Kurt agreed, “it doesn’t.  But if you don’t mind, the only handsome hunk I want to spend time with tonight is you. Do you mind if we go see Cirque?”

Adam wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “I don’t mind at all.  What do you say we go grab supper first, then we’ll hunt up tickets to whatever performance is playing closest. Or did you have your heart set on a particular one?”

“LOVE?” he said hopefully.  

“The Beatles show?” Adam asked.  When Kurt nodded, he smiled. “Makes sense, given what a fan you are. All right, then. I believe the tourist guide you picked up at the hotel showed a 9 pm performance at the Mirage. You don’t suppose they offer a native Englishman’s discount, do you?”

Kurt beamed. In spite of his country of origin, Adam was not a major fan of the Beatles. Just the same, the idea of seeing a whole show centered around their music clearly did not bother him. It was so nice to be with someone who was willing to give the things Kurt liked a fair try, without immediately arguing for something they liked better. It made him eager to return the favor whenever he could, and he had been rewarded with a number of interesting experiences that he otherwise might have missed. “Probably not, but we can give it a try.”

“All right, then. Let’s go cash in your fortune and grab a bite. Maybe we’ll make one last pass through the casinos on our way back tonight and see if your lucky streak is still in business. How are you at craps?”

“I’m better at poker,” he confessed as they began winding their way through the aisles of slot machines and oblivious gamblers. At Adam’s questioning glance, he said, “I used to play with my dad and his mechanics. They taught me the basics, but Dad says I have a pretty good poker face, and I could usually bluff them all by the time I hit my teens.”

Adam pondered that, studying his boyfriend’s innocent looking features and recalling a few stories he’d heard from Kurt’s former school chums about him backing down bullies twice his size. In his unguarded moments, everything Kurt felt showed in his face, but when he had his guard up?  “I believe it. And I think I’d like to witness your skill at the tables for myself. Just don’t let yourself get caught up in any all-night poker tournaments, hmm?”

“Why not?  Got other plans for me?” he asked with a smile, giving Adam’s waist a firm squeeze. 

“Always,” he returned with a teasing wink. “But in fact, I want you to get a good night’s sleep tonight so you’ll have lots of energy for tomorrow.”

Excitement flared in Kurt’s eyes. “What’s happening tomorrow?”

“It’s a surprise,” he said with maddening nonchalance. Seeing Kurt’s pout, he smiled. “I won’t give it away, but I’ll give you a little hint to chew on. This particular surprise is not mine. The daytime portion comes courtesy of Rachel and Santana. And for the nighttime half, you can thank your dad and step-mum.  Since you couldn’t be with them on your birthday, they all wanted to be sure that you would spend it doing something you’ll love. The girls helped me pack you up an appropriate outfit for tomorrow, since I had directed you to bring only casual wear.”

Equal parts puzzled and intrigued, Kurt fell silent for the rest of the walk out of the casino and out into the warm spring night, as Adam steered him safely along the Strip with a hand planted at the small of his back. 

They made a striking picture walking together. Adam, with his golden blond hair and newly-acquired suntan, firm muscular body showed off to good effect by a tight white cotton button down and jeans; and Kurt with his reddish brown hair and still-pale skin catching the rays of late evening sunshine, tall and slender in his tight black jeans and patterned navy shirt, its sleeves rolled up to show off a pair of nicely defined biceps. 

“I can’t think of anything Dad would get excited about in Vegas,” Kurt admitted at last, coming back to earth as Adam pointed to a neon sign garishly blinking advertisement for a buffet restaurant. He nodded, then finished his thought, “unless they got us tickets to Caesar’s Palace, and I know he’s not sending me to a boxing match!”

Adam’s face remained utterly innocent, but a twitch in his cheek had Kurt asking, “What?”

“Promise you won’t tell Burt I let the cat out of the bag?” Kurt nodded eagerly. “Right location, wrong event.”

Kurt chewed on that clue while Adam paid for two all-inclusive dinners and they took their place in line.  After a moment, he gasped, and by the time they had filled their plates and found a table, he was trembling with suppressed excitement. Staring Adam straight in the eye, he nearly whispered, “Adam, they didn’t. They couldn’t have. Did they?  Adam, are . . . are we going to see Celine tomorrow night?”

A grin he could not keep at bay anymore spread across Adam’s handsome face. “I should have known you would guess it.”

“Oh my God!” Kurt shrieked, clapping a hand over his mouth when the exclamation startling an old couple walking past their table. He called, “Sorry!” then turned back to Adam. “Are you serious?”

He laughed. “Absolutely. The ladies have prepaid a luxury package for you at the day spa attached to our hotel, and I will leave you to their tender mercies for a couple of hours while I check on certain arrangements that I’ve made. Then in the evening, we’ll head over to Caesar’s to see the show.”

The smile on Adam’s face was rather smug, as well it should have been. Kurt could not imagine what he had done to deserve such a wonderful boyfriend. He did not doubt for a moment that it had been Adam who put the thought of buying tickets to one of Kurt’s all time favorite divas into Dad and Carole’s heads. His parents were wonderful people, but their musical taste rarely ventured past the 80′s classic rock station. 

Wishing he felt daring enough to lean across the table and plant kisses all over Adam’s face, Kurt settled for squeezing his hand and saying, “I love you, Adam. Thank you so much for giving me this. And I don’t just mean the concert and things.”

Clearly knowing just what he was trying to say, Adam lifted Kurt’s hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. “You’re welcome, darling. Happy Birthday.”

THE END

A/N: I ended it here because I’ve never seen either of the entertainments they’re about to experience, nor do I know how to play poker. So we’ll just imagine they had an amazing time at everything, went home to New York richer in both money and experience, and that Adam is going to get very very lucky for many many nights.  :)

[jjungkooksthighs]

HIII ITS ME HEART FLUTTERING ANON 😁 SO! FAV CHAPTERS EEEE first of all chap 1 had me hooked obviously from the start, and for chap 2 i lovedddd how it set the scene for how they first met and then when they ran into each other again ... literal tingles up and down the way he TALKED to her??? “pretty omega ... i won’t bite” AHHHHHHHHHHHH

and then all of chapter 3 was so good the way he was talking to her again was sooo good so possessive and it was incredible like i don’t know if you understand literally LITERALLY it makes my body tingle and then chap 4 when he carried her through the forest and hes all like “you wouldn’t want me to lose control would you” AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

and then chapter 5 i love that you wrote her a sweet best friend and also that scene where she imagined him .... GOD ur incredible. and then the ENDING. when taehyung popped out .... i’m actually double biased with taehyung and jungkook and so when that happened i was like JHDJSAIWIQKSJJS more tingles it was so well written please

... then chap 6. do i even need to say anything? thigh riding i CANT i almost passed out and he made her admit that she had her own fantasies and nobody could do it like him .... also the end when he was like “it won’t be just your legs that ache in my wake” AHHHHHHHHHHHH LIKE I SWEAR MY WHOLE BODY JUS. IDK HOW TO DESCRIBE IT OTHER THAN AHHHHHHHHHHH

chap 7 ... the whole dancing scene was so hot and then he told her to come to him OOOOO ANTICIPATION

finally chap 8 GODDDD first of all i love grinding like literally you don’t even understand and so when you wrote that in i was like EEEEEEE and then she went down on him and at the same time she got off on his leg that was so so sexy but then they have to go apart again :( until the next chapter !

so. in case you haven’t noticed it’s very hard for me to pick a fav chapter. lol. BUT i would def say chap 6 and chap 8 for obvious reasons, chapter 3 and 4 were also really sexy but i think my fav will be chapter 9 actually i’m anticipating it a lot and i’m sure it’ll be nothing but amazing ... that’s not pressure it’s me having faith in you cause you’re an amazing writer and i’m so excited to see what you come up with next hehe

i hope tbis wasn’t too long and annoying to read but yeah ily

Chapter 1 of COC was written during a lust filled craze following the Idol performance at Gyeongbokgung Palace that they boys did for that BTS week on Jimmy Kimmel’s show. Kook really was in a rare form following his 23rd birthday and that performance truly had me salivating over him from start to finish. I saw Jungkook and my eyes did not stray from him once and not a day later, I was working on a fic that I had no idea would become the 40k plus piece that is now COC. 

Chapter 1 was brought you to my overwhelming horniness after that performance and it’s interesting that you were lured to my fic in the same way Jungkook allured me to him even from the moment I first saw him back in 2013. 

You caught that little bit with him biting her in chapter 2, huh?? XD I am impressed. Perhaps he was joking, perhaps he knew from that second he saw her that she was destined to be his mate and therefore was hinting at a future mating mark???

Moving on, Jungkook is indeed a very possessive individual (from what we know of him irl in that he’s said “what is yours is mine and what is mine is mine”) and I wanted to depict that side of him in addition to making that trait even more abundant in his character in the story since wolves themselves are very territorial and possessive creatures. If Jungkook irl likes to stake his claim on things, then you can only image how much more enhanced that side of him would be if here were, say, a werewolf. 

I am glad you Jungkook’s characterization in the way that he converses with those around him (especially reader) and when I was writing, I wanted reader to feel shy and even more, I wanted you guys as the readers to “feel” the tingle that she does when he speaks to her. The fact that you do means i succeeded in that and I am very, very pleased to hear it!

As for his comment about “losing control,” let us just say that every single time that reader is around him, it takes him an enormous amount of self-restraint not to let his urges take hold of him that she brings out whenever he inhales her pheromones that make his baser being howl with need for in addition to her own personality that he finds very refreshing and adorable. On top of all that, she’s the most beautiful creature he’s ever seen, so he’s quite taken with her and she with him. I wanted to instill that desire between them as well within their conversations and hopefully that is conveyed in the chapters, too!

Chapter five....that one was one written after quite the dream I had. I will say that one was genius if I do say so myself. It was so long and i had so much I wanted to do with it and the final product I was actually really satisfied with. I’m happy to know you were, too, hun! It’s funny you say you are double biased with Tae as someone I know very well irl is biased so hard for him that not even Kook can sway her attention (and lbr how can one NOT look at Jungkook when he’s sin incarnate when he wants to be and cute lil baby boy when he feels like being sweet?)

LISTEN CHAPTER SIX I WROTE IN ANOTHER LUST FILLED HAZE OKAY I MAKE NO APOLOGIES FOR THIGH RIDING I MEAN HAVE YOU SEEN HIS LEGS??? HAVE YOU??? LITERAL ORGASM MATERIAL ISTG I WOULD RIDE THEM WHENEVER, WHEREVER AND HOWEVER HE WANTED IF HE LET ME. MY URL LITERALLY IS JJUNGKOOKSTHIGHS OKAY I MUST PAY HOMAGE TO THE CREATIONS OF THE FINEST MAKING TO MAN (honestly though everything about Jungkook is a gift from the gods). i cannot tell you how many times I have thought about fucking myself over his thighs okay it’s just not healthy and let us leave it at that. Ahem, anyways.... chapter six really was something, huh? That whole chapter got deleted off my computer after I closed the file and forgot to save it and so had to rewrite the whole thing from scratch. It was a sad day when that happened, but I got right back to work and finished the reworked version about two days later. I had worried for some time that that chapter wasn’t as hot because of the diction in it, so hopefully you were able to immerse yourself in that and get those tingles there, too XD

Chapter seven was especially long and that one was actually deleted originally after some comments about the diction and so I had to rewrite it and repost it so that people would be able to understand it better. That whole dance scene is very close to my heart as it was taken directly from that little dance break Jungkook does in his My Time performance during their online MOTS: One concert. The song he sings is also My Time, which is my favorite solo song (in combination with Euphoria because they are both my children and you can’t pick favorites with children lbr), so that whole little show he puts on for reader is very special to me since I love the song (and dance) so much. 

Chapter eight was hot af, I admit it. He really did a number on reader in chapter seven and so she wanted to show him how he made her feel and boy, did she deliver. He fell even harder for her when he realized she wanted to please him despite her inexperience and it was a godly experience for him to be able to teach her how to use her mouth on the only cock that she will ever have in her mouth or her cunt. :) They are animals after all, for only animals do what they did in that chapter in terms of her literally rutting against his leg and getting off while she drank his seed after blowing him. Anyways, it was hot and I confess, my mind really was somewhere south while writing that. 

Oh, and to clarify, they don’t separate in that chapter (and I have begun to write chapter nine and they are not apart in that one either. Well, in the beginning at least ). 

So, chapters 6 and 8 were your favorites, huh? Looks like your favorite ones are the ones with smut , eh??? Interesting... I will say that chapter nine will not have any smut in it, but I think you will be pleased with it when you read it. You will have quite a lot of emotions hit you during it and I hope to do you justice when I post it, hon. 

Thank you so much for giving me such a long and detailed response. You may think I found it annoying, but I assure you that I did not. Rather, I thought the opposite in that it was endearing and I want you to know how grateful I am that you took the time to write all this out and send it to me. I wanted to give you a response that was just as detailed and thoughtful as I appreciate you for doing what you did. So, I guess what I am trying to say is thank you for this. I enjoyed reading your thoughts and i hope you will be appeased by my reply in turn, sweetling. 

[mistralrunner]

Running Reads Oathbringer: Part II.III

Spoilers for pages 410-480 below. Also some Mistborn spoilers cause of a couple Cosmere thoughts.

"No good can come of two Shards settling in one location."

*looks at Ruin and Preservation*

Okay it was a bit dire there for a while but they really fit together.

And what about worlds with three Shards?

Does this mean this Shard isn't Cultivation then?

Maybe Autonomy? 

I'm glad Jasnah has some healthy paranoia

Good Jasnah, ensuring Shallan is actually involved in the meeting

Ah yes now we get into discussions of the Parshmen

Yay Kaladin for defending them.

War only fuels Odium after all

"Maybe that should make you reconsider those other wars, rather than using them to justify this one."

Ooooh

You go Kaladin

I am worried though, cause the Voidspren definitely have experience with manipulating negotiations and I think even one of the Listener songs referred to it

The Parshmen do not deserve this

There has to be another way

Kholinar being a dark spot is really concerning. Like how does that happen magically?

Heh a strike squad infiltrating a possibly occupied city

This is going to be fun

I wonder who the three men in Kaladin's strike squad will be

(or maybe we could bring in Lyn so it's not all dudes in a strike squad just saying)

(I know she actually has to learn to Invest first but I can dream)

Jasnah has a point about the long term

The danger of different orders is the conflict. The value is that they can focus on different aspects of the war

BAHAHAHAHA I love Jasnah's plan just for the sheer audacity of it

But I agree with Dalinar, locating's good, killing less certain

I'm kind of sad that the only interaction between my faves has been antagonistic

Jasnah you are admittedly overlooking the point that war fuels Odium. Killing Parshmen will make them more your enemy and only lead to more war.

I'm definitely not opposed to Windrunner scouts though

Jasnah had better cuddle some skyeels

I can’t believe this is a sentence I wrote. What is this book.

Ugh no please no love triangle Shallan stop doodling Kaladin also seriously you had one job

I'm with Jasnah on this. Shallan has accomplished a lot but she's settling on her laurels when she needs to grow in a lot of ways.

Shallan you are Veil

Shallan the secrets will blow up in your face and likely hurt others

Aww Jasnah's including Renarin

Well Shallan I'm glad you delegated investigating Shadesmar in this room to Jasnah, your judgement isn't entirely horrible

I do relate to some degree to that uncertain adulthood thing, but Shallan really is not on a great path right now

Helaran was of the Skybreakers ooo

But didn't have a real Shardblade?

Uli Da? Ooo who is she.

Oh hey exposition on the factions

It is kind of cool how there secretly have been Radiants of one order this whole time

Oh, that's why Shallan's mother...she was close to a Skybreakers acolytes

Someone else in Amaram's army bonded a spren and was eliminated?

If it was Tien...

Heh this letter deserves further investigation cause Pattern is right, this is half truths

This Veil thing is getting seriously concerning. I mean I understand the value of having an escape and sides to yourself that others don't know and secrets that are nice to keep to oneself but this is getting a bit deep.

Also I feel like encouraging disparaging yourself among your employees isn't a good idea

Heh it's the opposite of that undercover boss skit

"I heard that Shallan has a six pack"

I mean it is good to learn from them but I don't think that is Shallan's intent

What happened to the scholar?

Well Gaz, that's a light way of putting, I tried to kill Kaladin on his very first day and was awful to all of them

Shallan do listen to them. Be a leader and give your soldiers purpose.

Also what happened to those slaves you took Shallan. Did you just leave them behind. Seriously you should have freed them from the start.

Oh dear this Ghostbloods fangirl is going to be a problem

Heh if someone asks Shallan to start investigating Veil the Ghostblood’s spy as Adolin is investigating Sadeas's murder that would be hilarious

Okay this is an interesting turn of events. Learning how to spy by testing someone's spying abilities by having them train you a spy network of soldiers. I'm curious to see how this goes...Shallan.

This Shard concerns me. Also is super arrogant. "If Rayse becomes an issue, he will be dealt with. And so will you."

Teft!

Now will we finally learn what you are up to?

Oh no is it drugs?

What happened to you in such a short span? You were the reliable one helping train all the other Bridge crews.

Firemoss? That's the only drug we've heard of right?

Yep, firemoss.

Ugh Sadeas's soldiers can't stop being awful can they

Oh no addicted and suicidal Teft no

Oh no seeing things. People or spren?

Please don't let Kaladin know his absence contributed to this he already suffers enough

Yep a spren

Teft you're so close yet so far you're actually talking to a spren but like so many Radiants really need some help to move forward

YES BRIDGE FOUR INTERVENTION

BEING THERE FOR EACH OTHER

Hopefully Kaladin's medical knowledge will help here

Teft why why Sanderson must Bridge Four members suffer but at least they're there for each other

"Cephandrius, bearer of the First Gem"

Hmm is that "the element" mentioned in the first letter

Also this Shard is arrogant. I don't care if they're a god.

Dalinar why are you putting Gawx through this the child does not deserve this

Huh so Jasnah found something interesting indeed during that vision

Hehe Jez has dark eyes excellent make those lighteyes uncomfortable

Oh hey a dead or partially dead Aimian

Gawx does have a point, Dalinar could just be crafting whatever visions strengthen his argument

Heh of course the Azish would see the Alethi with a code of law barely 30 years old as barbaric

I'm so proud of Gawx. Admittedly he knew a lot even before taking on this intense role as emperor. Just the knowledge and eloquence.

Also the Sunmaker is horrible.

Ten percent?

Oh god.

And then the Alethi honor his example. Yeah the Azish really have good reason not to trust the Alethi. This long break between Desolations really did allow people to do awful things and engender distrust.

I still am amused by how Sadees is one step away from Sadeas

YES LIFT IS HERE YES YES YES YES YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

LIFT I MISSED YOU SO

heh she's still bitter about the pancakes

Also she can enter this even though she's not presently with Gawx? Connection I guess

Heh she's baffling even the Stormfather

Half in the Cognitive Realm does lead to some fun things

Pale white eyes? I didn’t realize she had those? Unless it’s just the Wyndleblade/Shardfork effect?

LIFT

I'M DYING HERE

"He's got too nice a butt"

Lift I love you

I mean in classic Lift fashion her argument actually does have logic behind it, as unconventional as it is

Wait why does that uniform look weird oh god the patch is gone Moaaash

"You have spoken to one who cannot respond. We, instead, will take your communication to us-though we know not how you located us upon this world." kind of lost you there

Anyways back to crying about Moash and how he lost Bridge Four and Horneater stew

He still has his coat?

Nooo not the Bridge Four patch

But Moash, Kaladin couldn't bear to tell Bridge Four

Good move starting this chapter in a twisted reflection of the nights of stew and comradely of Bridge Four

Graves is dead?

That is not a turn I expected I thought Moash would be solidly with the Diagram

Well Moash's concerns about not being in Shardplate proved true

I'm having feelings about Kaladin saving Moash even now via the training

Oh no Fused with Surges

Friction and Gravitation seen so far

Do they all have two or one

Don't let them get the Plate

Yeah spears over swords!

Kaladin's training, saving lives when he can’t be there personally

Does she have Friction and Gravitation at once? Different combinations of Surges?

Ah they can't heal though

But where do they get the dark light

Szeth said something about them supposedly being able to hold it perfectly so they don't need recharging as much, but then are also more limited?

Oh noooo

Don't give them the Shards

Oh noooo

This is probably worse than being with the Diagram

This is so much worse

Angst is coming

But woah

Are those

Oh my god are those skyships? We're getting fabrials skyships?

That go above the storms with sails pointing down toward them?

Eeee

Vaguely crustacean vaguely sci-fi skyships!

"We are indeed intrigued, for we thought it well hidden. Insignificant among our many realms." Wait are there Shards with more than one world? I am so confused.

Ooh spies freelance or working for highprinces

The idea of being watched everywhere always makes me a tad uncomfortable even as the concept of observing is intriguing. Really this whole spying versus scouting thing is something I really should be delving into with my own story but that’s a tangent

Heh the mind museum trick I know that one not that I ever used it

I am really getting concerned about the multiple personalities

Oh hey by the way I'm still worried about Moash. Just thought I should mention that.

It's scary to think of how much Shallan has changed. She used to be excited about learning, about being part of things. She's splintered now.

I want to be in the room where it happens the room where it happens seriously that room has so many interesting conversations going on

Shallan barely read those books Adolin gave her?

She had the promise to become one of the greatest scholars of her time. It’s making me really sad.

Ooh yes they're talking about the ships yesss

Ugh this cuts a bit too familiar

Surrounded by brilliant smart people, but not taking advantage of it, feeling left behind, overwhelmed, not living up to your potential of scholarship...

Going from being excited to missing appointments

Changing, losing pieces of oneself

Well at least my identity  issues aren't as bad

Cause oh god Shallan just thinking of taking in different masks and forgetting who she is

Forgetting this partially started with her wanting to be a scholar

Shallan's really being left behind

Not growing, just escaping

But hey Navani is hosting a meeting of smart people that is awesome

Yes for Jasnah supporting Renarin thank you

Is that Evi's chain he's fidgeting with?

I want to be at this meeting

Ever since Amaram I'm suspicious of every stormwarden. I don't know it they're all with the Sons of Honor or not but still.

Elthebar is a jerk interrupting women and insulting them at a science meeting

I'd like to punch all the people insulting and laughing at Renarin please and thank you

(Also I guess it's development for Shallan to go from wanting Renarin muffled to being angry at the Alethi court's treatment of him...or is it just jealousy)

Oh dear Shallan that isn't even some of your quality banter

Shallan is lacking in female friends and it is sad

Aww Jasnah feeling she's been a bad mentor to Shallan

Oh hey Renarin and Shallan getting along that's much better and Shallan agreeing with Renarin's assessment also good

Also the city being one giant fabrial is pretty cool

Heh I love the sentiment of we could stand up to Jasnah but she's usually right about things

Oh please don't go on that mission to Kholinar I know I wanted a woman in the party but I do not want any love triangle nonsense

Aww Dalinar being there for Renarin

If Moash meets the Parshmen Kaladin trained that would be hilarious

You were also trained and protected by Kaladin Stormblessed? Wow we're everywhere.

(The idea that there are more of them around now because some actually do live)

"As the waves of the sea must continue to surge, so must our will continue resolute. Alone." I am so confused but so concerned

Pfft I wanted a pov in Revolar even though I knew Kaladin had to leave and now we've got one

It's comforting to know that the Voidbringers don't seem to have the same mastery of Surges as the Radiants. At least for now.

Huh eaves culture I've also been considering that for my own worldbuilding

Wonder if he'll hear of Kaladin's wind stunt

Oh no don't do that. I knew it would happen because the Fused are in charge but don't counteract slavery with slavery

The irony that Moash is a slave now after being one of the Bridge Four members that technically wasn't a slave

I really did not see this turn coming and I’m looking forward to seeing where it goes

Hehe I wonder what will happen when Kaladin sees Moash's Shardblade on the battlefield

Huh Moash's backstory in the caravans comes into play nothing is wasted

Oh no the awful lighteyes is in charge of them, there's hierarchy and why they're all slaves and yet

Well Moash, you're right on the brokenness of humanity, wrong on Kaladin not being broken

Kaladin just fought to be something beyond broken and brought others up with him

This is messed up

But hey, Moash is heading toward the battle eventually that way

Alright definitely a Shard that isn't Cultivation since they don't care about Roshar, my guess is Autonomy

Skar!

"When the dream dies" is a concerning chapter title

Good news, most of Bridge Four can draw in Stormlight. Bad news, Skar, Dabbid, and Rlain can't.

Wonder how the scout ladies are doing?

Under six minutes for over a mile with a pack hm wish we had exact measurements is Roshar mile even a mile is a minute even a minute I'm curious about pacing and how fast you can run with Stormlight

Huh lashing plus Stormlight to improve running speed

I would not want to feel like I was running downhill forever it's hard on the knees and I instinctively pull back lest i fall

Teft I worry about you

Chouta returns!

Bridge Four having issues but still supporting one another yes

I'm so proud of how far they've come but ouch Skar the feeling of falling behind especially cause he was one of the naturals with a spear

Kaladin why are you late but Teft how dare you say that about Kaladin.

He's trying. He has to be there for Bridge Four and also be the one advocating for not mass murder as a solution to things

Ah things are not all well

"Finally deigned to arrive" that wording bothers me I'm protective of Kaladin

They still haven't realized that those talented people probably won't stand a chance of becoming a squire unless they fix their Connection problem

Which they'd better cause I want female Windrunners

Oh hey Koen from the old cobalt guard joined Bridge Four

That's clever swapping two groups for the same amount of Stormlight as one

Aww they found the room of Listener art

Plateau runs still happen? That's bizarre if reasonable.

I have feels about that bridge

Aww Rock's kids setting up a water station

I'm curious about this Elhokar mission cause there's so much of the book left so it can't be the climax

Kaladin. Team bonding. Not drills. That is the secret.

They're flying I'm so proud

No Skar you are part of Bridge Four glow or not

Okay good Lyn and Skar get solidarity that helps with Connection right?

Yes a world where rank and eye color don't matter would be nice. It's not so simple and it's certainly not automatic but at least there's hope for change

Huh Skar was aware of what Kaladin did with the arrows that early on

Oh right Skar is a teacher this is helpful for him

YES LYN YES

Heh and Skar only learns to glow when he feels content with just helping others

This is a feel good chapter

I'm so happy

YES JASNAH CHAPTER AT LAST

Oh god some of them admire Rayse's "initiative"? Who would have been the correct one?

I am more concerned about the Shards than ever before, and about Sazed on the battlefield with the old crowd who know so much more

Yes I want more Ivory content

Jasnah's so cautious

Also I appreciate how she had a backup of her notes

Huh we never got a scene of Shallan returning the notes she retrieved from Jasnah's trunk. Where are they. Also the drawing.

Oh okay so she probably got the notes back

I'm glad Jasnah has a spren friend to talk to. She's not entirely alone.

Also of course her spren is also logical.

Ah she's worried about Shallan

I want to give Jasnah a hug

What happened to her?

"A childhood illness nobody else seemed to remember...it had taught her that people she loved could still hurt her."

Oh god she fears madness. Losing the intellect she relies upon, not being able to trust fact. What was that one time she couldn't rely on her mind.

Of course the scholar gets inkspren

The idea that culture was almost entirely lost among many spren due to the Recreance and is barely starting to recover yikes

Cryptics really do have a reputation.

Inkspren war with Honorspren?

Huh Ivory is a fitting defiant name

So Honorspren seek rule over Shadesmar? It doesn't feel like Honor.

Huh there's some poetry to the Skybreakers not ending in death but living in it instead

Oh.

Jasnah knows.

Wit knew and now Jasnah knows.

And she's tough enough to withstand it.

And she's working on Oathbringer.

I love how it makes so much sense she's on the cover. It's Dalinar's flashback book but Jasnah is the one writing the book and holding the deep secret

I still want the Jasnah and Wit road trip

[jangbyul]

I was debating whether I should post this here but i decided that I would because more than anything I want to be able to remember this experience and for those who continue to read this post, maybe it can provide them with more insight on how things operate at Kpop concerts. also, I hope this post can provide some laughter and that whoever reads it, will fall in love with vixx even more because heck I sure did <3 

warning: the following blurbs you are about to read contains many many grammatical error and may not even make sense because I wrote it after the concert at around 2am in an attempt to remember everything so please bear with me OTL I also didn't go into too much detail about the format and setlist because I mainly wanted to remember the things VIXX did and their cute interactions with one another. enjoy! 

----

Rehearsal

They came out in their casual clothes and omg they looked so freaking fluffy!!! And can I just say that they have such amazing skin like holy they didn’t have makeup on but they still looked pretty and glowy and flawless like how? Hongbin was in this navy long zip hoodie and a plain white shirt paired with blacked jeans? Damn he looked so good in such a simple outfit! Poor bb looked so sleepy though :( hyukkie omg I feel bad because I don’t remember exactly what he was wearing but I think he was wearing a white shirt as well? I was too focused on him being adorable and teasing Leo haha so they performed 2 songs during rehearsal - good night and good morning as well as dynamite and during dynamite hyuk playfully tapped Leo’s cap xD so yeah Leo was wearing a baseball cap with Chicago on it? And his outfit was mostly white, I would say his was the most laid back for sure! Ravi was in a black tee and black pants and a black beanie as well (all black lol) i am sad to say that Ravi looked tired as well and didn’t smile much but he still killed his rap parts though! Next is hakyeon! That boy was dressed up looking chic as hell! He was also in an all black outfit but he had a leather? jacket on and black skinny jeans. He looked like he was in a good mood because he smiled quite often and said some things to the audience. Last but definitely not least is jaehwan. He was in a black hoodie which this scary picture of a doll on it lol as well as black jeans. He was sooo freaking smiley and there were times where he kinda bounced around on stage? He waved a lot to the audience and when rehearsal was over he was the last to leave the stage ^_^

Actual concert

this was such a blur! I was so sad we were only allowed to record 3 songs so I don’t even have a video for on and on (which is my fave song). But they all killed it! 100% killlllled it and they sound just as good live as they do on their CDs, no joke. since Im a hongbin stan I glued my eyes to him the majority of the time but seriously when it comes to dancing, hakyeon draws so much attention. Just the way he effortlessly moves and theres just so much passion when he dances. I couldn’t help but stare *_* jaehwan dances with a lot of power and confidence and he might not be the main dancer but I still think he did an amazing job! hyuk when he dances he’s freaking MANhyuk! he also has a lot of power when he dances like I don’t know how to explain it like his moves are just so intricate? hongbin my precious bean sweated so much LOL it was to the point that he grabbed a towel every chance he got and turned away from the crowd to wipe it xD I could tell he was super focused when dancing and damn he moves fast like one sec he was on the left side of the stage and then the next he was already on the floor on the right side of the stage! Judging by the amount of sweat and how he kept wiping his upper lip cuz of the sweat, he really worked hard <3 (he also freaking did a lip lick thing that drove me into a frenzy ugh) during to us, all the fans held up a banner and just enjoyed the song together. it was such a good feeling, to have so many starlights in one room and have vixx right in front of us ;;;;

Apart from the songs they also did this interactive-ish thing with us! Like prior to going into the concert we were allowed to write something we would like them to do on a sticky (ex. Jaehwan please do aegyo) etc and so hyuk designated himself to be the “MC” and how it worked was that each member would choose one of the stickies for the member on their right. Leo chose first and he chose one for jaehwan and what he had to do was sing a part from his musical. He did so without using his mic and at that moment I knew exactly what an angel sounded like *_* everyone in the crowd was in awe that I think we cheered too early because it looked like jaehwan wanted to continue still but stopped and clapped and then went back to his seat. Hakyeon even pointed out that the crowd was just waiting to scream because we went from “ahhhhh” to “WOOOOOODFGDFGDFGD” real quick haha next jaehwan chose a sticky for hakyeon! He took his time choosing and hakyeon actually got off his seat and went up to jaehwan (I guess to make sure he isn’t choosing something too difficult for hakyeon to do lol) and while jaehwan was choosing he beatboxed a little which drove us insane <3 hyuk said somethings like “oh choose for your love N, you bro N, your mother father N” XDD jaehwan finally chose one which was also for hakyeon to perform a song from his upcoming musical? I wasn’t too sure if it was from a musical because the translator there sucked lol hakyeon said he had to prep because he doesn’t rmr some lines but in the end he sang beautifully like he never ceases to amaze me with his voice that is just so suitable for ballads & lullabies yenno he kept going until hyuk had to intervene and tell him to stop he still kept going and it got crazy when ken started singing as well haha such cuties!! Anyway so next hakyeon chose for hongbin and omgosh I saw my sticky and was really hoping hakyeon would choose it but he didn’t OTL i wrote it for hongbin, asking if he could sing a ballad because precious bb has a lovely voice and deserves to sing more! In the end hakyeon chose one in which hongbin had to do aegyo and boy did he struggle! The first time he did it it was pretty quick but still adorable nonetheless because his voice went all high pitched eeee so hyuk actually made him do it a second time and it was slightly longer and his voice went from high back to his usual lowish voice cuz he got so embarrassed.. hongbin said something and the translator said hongbin was sad because starlights didn’t understand his true feelings TT I guess he really didn’t want to do aegyo :( hongbin chose for Ravi and my Rabin feels were reignited because hongbin took two stickies and allowed Ravi to choose one! Ravi chose to also do aegyo I think? And he ended up doing the “oppa song”??? some cute music played and Ravi had to do aegyo to it but it seems like he was prepared and did it without hesitating that even the members joked and commented that he was really good at it LOL our Ravi may be the badass rapper and has tats to prove it....but he is too cute when he wants to be :3

Somewhere in there Ravi had to do an eye battle with hakyeon and lol hakyeon was so pumped and ready, being so confident he was gonna win and had that smug look on his face while provoking ravi by playfully hitting him on the chest. In the end hakyeon did win (but I feel like thats because he purposely made Ravi blink HAHA). Ravi chose for hyuk and hyuk had to dance to chained up double speed! That of course was too easy so it got ramped up to triple speed and I think later to quadruple speed?? Triple/quadruple speed was hella fast and hyuk was moving so fast that by the end of it he was so exhausted and joked that he can never do a concert again! He looked a bit frazzled afterwards so ken was like are you ok??? Oh yeah and we somehow got ken to do triple/quadruple speed as well but he didn’t even try to go super fast because srsly it’s killer! Hyuk was still recovering so Leo asked if he could chose his own and hyuk let him. Leo chose to perform a bit of whisper with Ravi!!!!! It was just the chorus but they did a bit of the chore and leo sang without the music and Ravi rapped without the music as well *_* because leo cheated by basically making it into a joint mission with Ravi, hyuk later chose another sticky for leo LOL this required leo to write each of the members name with his belly button xD poor leo didn’t want to do it at all and kept saying its weird!! He struggled so much and actually did his signature collapse onto the floor dying from embarrassment HAHA he managed to complete it but he did so by moving his entire body across he stage like he sat right next to hyuk on the right side but by the end of it he was all the way to the left side standing right in front of Ravi haha ken and hyuk demonstrated that you don’t have to move ur entire body but just your upper body xD then they wrapped up that segment and performed some more songs! after the final song when they were bowing and exiting the stage, ken did not want to leave and kept waving and blowing kisses ahhh those bbkins <333 hongbin legit had to come out, and drag him off the stage LOL then hongbin popped back out and did a heart with his hands ahhhh

I also just wanted to note that jaehwan was just a ball of sunshine throughout the entire concert. He constantly waved enthusiastically and smiled his puppy smile. he was just so playful and when fans shouted I love you to him he would immediately say I love you too back and jokingly act like yeah the fans love me most XD jaehwan definitely climbed up my bias list after this and I’m just so glad I got to witness his playful humorous side in real life. it made me think back to vixx’s reality shows and how the members always mention that theyre thankful for ken because ken jokes around and does his best to lighten up the mood after a stressful day ;A; Hyuk also made such a big effort speaking English to us and although it was just short sentences, I was still extremely proud of him and thankful that he made that effort <3 hakyeon too said a lot of sweet things to us and his humble self kept thanking us when really we should be thanking him for gracing us with his presence!!!!! Leo kept his cool demeanour for the majority of the concert, It wasn’t until the very last few songs where they came out not in their usual stage outfits that I saw leo being extra smiley and literally jumping and spinning on stage XD he went right next to jaehwan and started jumping with him (KEO IS REAL OK) hakyeon also made sure to go left to right and say bye to the fans and wave! Same with jaehwan hehe hongbin was mainly on the opposite side of me and oh how I wish he was on my side more during the last few songs!

I noticed that jaehwan was the most popular here like so many people I met that day were jaehwan stans hehe Ravi was also really popular and hakyeon too! Whenever hongbin sang I screamed extra hard because I really want him to feel just as loved and appreciated and same goes for hyuk too because those two have so much to offer!

Photo Op

I was such a nervous wreck LOL my friends and I were all strategizing a plan, trying to make sure we’d end up in front of our biases. it was 15 people per group so when it was our group’s turn I legit blanked out and just tried to navigate towards hongbin. So the order was N, Hyuk, Hongbin, Ravi, Ken, and Leo. I stepped onto the stage and was immediately greeted by N’s smiling face and wave. I waved back automatically and seriously couldn’t do anything but wave Lol i was way too stunned by his 6 foot beauty and that small eye contact! *_* I ended up somewhat in front of hongbin but like on the floor and not on a seat but its okay! The photo op was super quick like they took 2 pics and that was only like 20 seconds! the staff rushed us and kept telling us to move move move -.- As we got up to leave I quickly turned back and looked at hongbin and told him I love you ahhhh he looked at me and smiled and waved and that was all I needed to turn into a big pile of mush ffghfghfghf *_* I think I was able to catch eye contact with jaehwan after and I tried to say bye to leo but failed LOL as I got off the stage I still couldn’t believe I was able to muster up the courage to say something to hongbin eeeep! Oh and vixx is known to be giants right so I was expecting them to tower over me because I’m only 5’4…but up close they weren’t as tall as I expected. yeah they were impressive in height but not what I imagined I guess xD But yeah the photo op went by so quickly and I’m praying to god I look somewhat descent in the pictures they took lol rip

Im so sad that the concerts over and you bet I’m going to suffer from PCD for the next few weeks T_T but I’m just so thankful to have been able to experience this and to finally see them live! all the while meeting some pretty awesome people along the way! It was definitely a memorable concert that I hope to remember many years from now :)