#[ ty gab for your support 😭 ]

[lgcparker]

𝘴𝘶 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘴 7: 𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘯𝘪 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘶𝘮

“Hello! My name is Parker and I hope you enjoyed my cover. My dream is to sing more for you in the future, so please support me!”

The Introduction (☆/☆)

While Parker’s actual audition for Legacy Entertainment had been a spur-of-the-moment adventure at the time, the moment Parker was accepted, there was very little to stop him from taking the offer. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t Korean, nor did he have any substantial knowledge of the Korean language, because, for a very long time, Parker only wanted to make singing his life.

At the time he auditioned, he had been in university, studying something he barely resonated with, but when given the offer to become an idol— it seemed too good to be true. And there were moments where it was. Moving to Korea has been exciting, but the amount of work expected of trainees was not something he fully anticipated. He could sing but couldn’t dance, which turned out to be just as important, sometimes more. The amount of work he had to do to be able to competently follow choreography, control his breath, and keep a good expression while doing it— he never considered it. It was hard. Exhausting. He was given some grace for not knowing Korean at first, for getting tired too quickly, and for not understanding social norms, but that grace was only for so long, and he was expected not only to learn but to excel. 

If he wanted to be a singer, he had to prove himself to his peers and the coaches first. He came all this way, and to go home because it was hard seemed like a waste. He wanted to sing. And he knew he could do it. 

That drive and confidence are what got him far enough along to be introduced to the public via Legacy’s Youtube channel. And it felt good. 

He had been asked what his dream was, and he had answered like he always did: he wanted to sing. 

Even before the recording, he had practiced that song. He had picked ’Photograph’ because he liked it, yes, but also because he knew it was one he sang well and received good praise from his vocal coaches. And yet, he had been somewhat nervous. For all the confidence he usually processed, he had spent every moment leading up to the filming mulling over his song choices because, at the end of the day, whatever he did would be put up for millions of eyes to see and pick apart. That had been part of why he hadn’t picked a song in Korean. As much as he had improved in his pronunciation, he wanted his vocal color to be seen clearly. Loved and anticipated by future fans.

Even if it was just a video, being introduced was a big deal to Parker because it seemed to lead him that much closer to his dream.

Defining Moment - (FDS5) Performing for Seniors  (☆)

When considering a defining moment, Parker’s performance of Miss Independent seemed obvious. While one moment at the beginning of Future Dreams Season 5 might seem a bit odd, it still holds a good deal of value to Parker on a personal level and in illustrating his character, not only as a person but also as an idol. At that moment in time, it was well-acknowledged by coaches and even other trainees that Parker was indeed a strong vocalist; however, when posed with this task, he knew he didn’t want to sing a ballad. It seemed too easy, too expected, and not something he thought represented himself. He loved ballads, love longs, and injecting emotion into the things he sang so people could feel it, too, but the Parker Su he wanted to show was the Parker who was confident enough not to pick a technically difficult song. Furthermore, he wanted to show that he wasn’t the type of singer who could only stand in one place. Indeed, he was not able to dance as well as some of his peers and fellow contestants, but when he was on stage, it felt right. He knew he could move and smile and make it fun, make people enjoy watching him. 

The thing that honestly set him apart from his peers at the time, at least in his opinion, was his confidence and willingness to have fun, which remains something that, even to the current day, he prides himself on. And so, during that performance, he tried his best to fill up the stage and interact with his audience, even if they happened to be his seniors, people who in any other situation would and should intimidate him. What moves he could do somewhat competently, he did with a smile and a playfulness that was so genuinely himself; even if he hadn’t done well, the fact that he had done what felt right for himself was enough. 

But the thing was, he did do well.

He may not have won the whole season, but during that performance, he stood out to DBSD and was named their standout contestant for that challenge. Even if he hadn’t gotten the additional prize and voting benefit from that, the awe he felt and the validation of his decision had meant the world to him. Prior to the competition, he genuinely respected the members, especially Hyunbin. Their careers and paths were something he wanted desperately to follow. Even if Parker were to lose everything, this moment would still have so much worth to him.

Struggle - Languages (☆)

The reason the Goodal press conference had reinstated so much as a struggle for Parker is that while he knew he wanted to be a singer and had long accepted that Korean was a language he needed to master for his success, his relationship with actually speaking Chinese had been more complicated. As a child, his parents had insisted that he enroll in Chinese school, just as they were made to do, but unlike their parents before them, when Parker inevitably dropped out, there had been little pushback. He was a good kid and still partook in extracurriculars, so what was the big deal? What’s more, he knew enough to get by. He had stocked shelves at a big Chinese supermarket near his house and could reply back to aunties in English and broken Mandarin. It was enough back then, but it was during his prep for the press conference that he honestly regretted the choices he made as a child. 

Truly, it wasn’t until Parker moved to Korea that he even considered the pitfalls of being a monoglot and had to quickly change his perception of English being the only language he truly needed to survive and achieve his goals. Naturally, if he hadn’t learned Korean, then he would not have gotten very far at all in South Korea; furthermore, as he observed other Legacy seniors, such as YP, or even the introduction of LGC Girls Japan, he came to the conclusion that it would potentially be within his best interested to actively study the language he had put aside during his childhood. Even at this early stage in his trainee period, the number of people who assumed he already spoke some form of Chinese only seemed to solidify the notion he needed to take on more than just Korean at some point. 

Studying and practicing was hard and frustrating, especially on top of normal trainee schedules. Unlike the Spanish classes he half passed in High School, both Korean and Chinese used completely different languages with very different writing systems. It was hard. Really hard. Besides being stubborn, what Parker had to his benefit was his willingness to ‘try.’, especially when he now understood the necessity. Even if he said something weird or wrong, he kept trying despite the amount he struggled to fit words and grammar into the right places. While Korean was a necessity, Mandarin felt almost like something he needed to do for himself, especially since he had dug his own grave in his younger years. 

By the time Goodal selected him as one of their ad models for the Chinese market, he could say that his Korean could still be considered a good deal stronger than Mandarin. Perhaps in the eyes of some netizens and reporters,  he should have felt more shame for his shortcomings — and indeed, there was more embarrassment than he had felt with Korean — but even as he sat in front of said reporters at a brand press conference, all Parker could do was attempt to do the best that he could, and hope that even if he still struggled, and reverted to using English words now and then, that his efforts would be recognized. At the end of the day, being able to ‘debut’ in the Chinese market as someone of Chinese heritage was a big deal, even if he hadn’t considered the possibility before. However, through the contract with Goodal, Parker not only felt the importance for him to keep studying, but understood more than ever why his parents had attempted to push him into going to Chinese school. It wasn’t just a boring thing that cut into his weekend, but it was a part of his heritage and also an important ability that would benefit him further once he made his first mainland debut with Type Zero. 

Pepsi Taste of Summer (☆/☆)

The reason why Parker chose his involvement in Summer Taste was because it was his first real taste of what it would be like to work as an idol. At that time, he had been happy enough to have been selected to join the special evaluation team, which hadn’t actually been an easy go. In true Parker fashion, he tried his best, and even then, he received mixed reactions in regard to his growth compared to the other members of the evaluation team. That said, when he was eventually pulled aside (along with two other trainees) and informed he would be participating in this project, he had been floored.

Summer Taste had been his first time in the recording studio for something of this magnitude, and that in itself had been nerve-wracking. For all his usual confidence, the desire he felt to do well was something else. It was all-consuming and made him feel ill with anticipation. Prior to the recording, he had practiced as much as he could, but even when he found himself in the booth, he had genuinely been intimidated. This wasn’t something he was doing for fun— he had been chosen for a reason, and he not only needed to prove that he was the right choice, but he also had to keep in mind that this project was for a global company. Even if the ad only played in South Korea, there was no denying the reach it would have. People who didn't know him would see him in the music video, or hear his voice in the song.

Because of this, Parker did his best to take in the whole moment and learn. Every bit of feedback wasn’t to belittle his talent as a singer but to ensure that the end product would be the best it could be. This was a job at the end of the day, and he was expected to be cooperative, listen, and adjust accordingly.

This was also something that carried over to dance practices and the actual music video shooting. For as awe-inducing and fun as the shoot had been at times, he had to keep reminding himself to work hard and that he was lucky to be given this opportunity. If a choreographer or the director wanted him to do something again, even if their tone was harsh at the moment, he did it. He did it for them but also for himself. He had to get used to these things if he ever wanted to debut one day.

Achievement - Debuting with Type Zero  (☆)

Debuting with Type Zero had felt like a fever dream. One moment, he was losing Future Dreams, and the next, he was told that his dream of debuting as a singer would not be put on hold, like it had been prior to the show. For as cocky as it sounds, Parker always knew he’d debut one day, but he never knew when that day might be. And when he found out the news, he cried on camera. He had left everything — his friends, his family, his dog, his city — to fly across the world to chase this need to be on stage. He had learned to dance, act, and learn a whole new language. And after a few years of blood, sweat, and tears, it happened. 

The actual preparation for the debut had been intense. He felt like he barely had time to process anything before he was in a studio recording Type Zero’s next mini-album, his debut album. And then he was in the dance studio not only learning the choreography for the title song but also being expected to learn the group’s backlog. Perfect. Everything had to be perfect. If he was tired as a trainee, then it was nothing compared to the hours he spent learning and trying to catch up with the other members. At the time, he had been lucky not to have to go through that alone and had another new member to lean on, but it still didn’t detract from the reality of the situation. He was going to debut.

And then, Back to Zero and Thunderous dropped. And he was revealed officially to the world. To Zenith.

However, this didn't mean he finally had time to breathe. Somehow, he managed to enjoy it. Looking back, there was perhaps never a time Parker felt more tired and overworked— his idol muscles were still forming — however, he wouldn’t trade those moments for anything. Debuting and being on stage, singing had always been his dream, and to have finally achieved that felt like he had caught a star with his bare hands. 

How on earth had he been so lucky?