#@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

Fics that feature chronic pain

This week we have 7 fics that include chronic pain, across a wide range of genres. Check them out beneath the cut, and comment or kudos if you like them!

The Fluffy Painkille by thesweetpianowritingdownmylife (6387, General) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes,

Frumpkin secretly visits Essek, Essek discovers Frumpkin's purring helps with his chronic pain.

Reccer says: I liked it!

Lacuna by Sangreal (94811, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Torture

Essek is captured and tortured by the Dynasty for his crimes, losing his memory and magic. It is a long road to recovery.

Reccer says: I love this fic and honestly it's one of my favorite depictions of Essek with a permanent disability. The story is super engaging too.

Something To Believe In by AwesomeFroggy (108948, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Where Caleb is a librarian, Essek is exiled to Nicodranas, and Jester (as ever) is ready for shenanigans

Reccer says: The thing about self indulgent fics (and this one states that it is one) is that they tend to be written with so much love and comfort that it makes the entire fic better. This is definitely one of them

the handbook of touch by Anonymous (2481, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek has chronic pain. Caleb helps him by massaging his hands

Reccer says: It's hurt/comfort and intimacy and hands - it's great!

Coping Skills by eldritchmochi (251061, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Modern with magic AU, Caleb and Essek are both involved in the local kink scene and meet there, they also know each other from work, smut ensues.

Reccer says: I liked it!

a winter's crest detour by jaskofalltrades (22873, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: Choose Not to Warn

Essek’s less than anticipated Winter's Crest plans to spend the holidays with his unwanted fiancé get off to a rough start when his flight is rerouted to the middle of nowhere. He winds up trapped with fellow strandee Caleb, who manages to turn Essek’s entire world upside down and might just change Essek’s life for the better.

Reccer says: This is one of my comfort fics. It's like sipping a cup of hot cocoa while it's snowing outside.

Girl, Interrupting by Defiler_Wyrm (1902, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Jester casts sending at the worst possible time and blows a secret wide open!

Reccer says: It's short, sweet, hot & funny all in one neat little package. The chronic pain part isn't made a huge deal of but it's given space to be important.

This is one of our weekly communally-generated shadowgast rec lists. Every week we announce a new theme and allow anyone to submit a fic recommendation. 

And hey, anyone includes you!

Next week, we'll be featuring dancing! Whether that be ballroom, pole or anything in between

Any fics coming to mind? Well, then use this form to submit!

This week's list was also the 69th unique theme! (nice)

[thesweetpianowritingdownmylife]

*banging pots and pans together* I'm unwell about a new thing, which is actually a couple of years old thing and as such might not get a lot of attention, but I hope you can check it out!

[proficientatfreakness]

My best friend chose violence today

Time to FIGHT BACK

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife RUN

[gryphon982]

tagged by @madtomedgar

WIP ask game -- post the last sentence you wrote and then tag as many people as there are words in that sentence  as i feel like

The actual last sentance was a run-on monstrosity, so you get this one instead:

“Lan-zongzhu is currently wrist-deep in white silk, kneading like a cat.”

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife @esmeraldablazingsky @zeldahime @tellingetienne @nothinghereisworking

[chibigrimmreaper]

I posted 12,617 times in 2022

That's 10,431 more posts than 2021!

78 posts created (1%)

12,539 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife

@derinthescarletpescatarian

@prismatic-bell

@gentrychild

@nitewrighter

I tagged 2,411 of my posts in 2022

#svsss - 165 posts

#bnha - 115 posts

#goncharov - 89 posts

#to look at later - 86 posts

#goncharov (1973) - 77 posts

#worthy info - 76 posts

#unreality - 72 posts

#toh - 70 posts

#stranger things - 69 posts

#atla - 68 posts

Longest Tag: 65 characters

#°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

me watching everything beginning to fall apart:

7 notes - Posted November 20, 2022

#4

I am finally understanding more the appeal of horrible characters doing horrible things, being sooooo bad to eachother and for eachother and themselves. They're a fascinating study.

7 notes - Posted September 1, 2022

#3

Trying to collect and compile all the events of goncharov is going to end up like robing hood

7 notes - Posted November 22, 2022

#2

the power imbalance, codependance and problematic behaviour patterns (gifts, possesiveness etc.) is beginning to

✨🎶~ s h o w ~🎶✨

7 notes - Posted November 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

The aro urge to compile a playlist of dark love songs because you recognize love isnt inherently pure and fulfilling like amatonormativity would lead you to believe.

178 notes - Posted September 1, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[icannotweave]

I posted 6,305 times in 2022

That's 2,695 more posts than 2021!

27 posts created (0%)

6,278 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@transratsactivist

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife

@nevershootamockingbird

@gutterdiamond

@gatheringbones

I tagged 6,299 of my posts in 2022

#ofmd - 1,291 posts

#comedy - 973 posts

#favorite - 919 posts

#edward teach - 638 posts

#queer - 628 posts

#bel check this out - 496 posts

#stede bonnet - 452 posts

#society - 400 posts

#video - 398 posts

#blackbonnet - 365 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#i’ve known since childhood they’re inadmissible but like…think hard about why inadmissible junk science is okay in interrogations 🙃🙃🙃

I sent 2 gifts in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

imagined stede giving edward the “you have bewitched me body and soul” speech and now am Very Normal about it.

28 notes - Posted August 3, 2022

#4

like a dog with a bird at your door • a playlist for izzy hands, pining gay homophobe.

44 notes - Posted April 29, 2022

#3

why aren’t more people insane over the tragically poetic irony the surnames “flint” and “silver” contain? just wondering.

78 notes - Posted August 25, 2022

#2

can’t stop thinking about izzy’s outfits (cause omfd is a queer little show so ofc its clothing symbolism is off the chain). 

he’s so leather clad, a uniform of blackbeard’s ranks, but his is so boring - ivan, fang, especially edward, all spice it up with a sleeve missing or a spiky headband and izzy is bare bones. he always wears gloves. he wears a fucking necktie. even his little cross tattoo is brutal, minimalist, no fun or art. he’s like a little biker businessman. 

repression is written all over his body and i'm obsessed.  

182 notes - Posted April 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

god god god I'm literally in tears over this post.

izzy hands is a goddamn walking tragedy because he’s trapped in the prison of subtext!! he’s not a part of the narrative, people like him aren’t heroes, they don't get to be happy or safe or loved gently. i also thought the speech about how People Like Them don’t get retirement was very queer (”we’re not those kinds of people/we don’t get nice things”). happy endings for queers are against the rules and izzy does nothing if not play by a homophobic story’s rules. 

he’s playing so so carefully by the rules of the supposed genre to survive and it’s so so sad. there really is a whole-ass theme of repeating cycles of abuse to feel safe, cycles which brutalize oneself and others (e.g. ed, the crew, etc.). where the possibility of something gentler and kinder hurts too much and therefore seems unsafe! but only cause insanity and danger are normative.

open queer love and joy and tenderness feel wrong (dangerous, unsafe, frightening) cause repression and violence are your love language (the only love language you are or will ever be allowed and no human being can survive without love, really, you have to find it where and however you can). the abuse of normative heterosexuality and masculinity have atrophied and warped him. he’s literally a victim who maintains systems which create victims, oh my god. 

izzy’s coping mechanisms (survival tools) of hurting rather than helping make so much sense when you think about them even a little bit through this lens. like! yes, it’s repetition compulsion probably but also...wow...no wonder he thinks he’s saving ed by forcing him to be brutal? (its for Your Own Good).

not just cause Things Make Sense Again (cause nothing is worse to an abuse survivor than chaos and instability - and nothing warps your ability to judge bad stability from good stability like abuse) when things are finally violent and chaotic again but also!! we can be Safe again! his manic joy makes so much sense cause! we followed all The Rules! we can be safe now, you and me! (”blackbeard is himself again” fuck me I'm sobbing). The Rules said we have to be this way and now things are safe and make sense again and nothing is unusual scary and bad anymore (it’s all the scary and bad I am used to once more). 

but also also...he can express and experience Love (abuse) once more now that blackbeard is back. he can have his Intricate Rituals back. he can have his nice safe little pining spot where he and blackbeard can go back to their subtext marriage and domestic bliss is reestablished. that’s why “he’s under strict orders not to mention his sexuality” wrecks me so much because!! I genuinely do hope he can also escape these abusive cycles and find queer joy and love for himself and know he’s not the narrative’s Bad Gay Man. 

if this show has taught us anything, it’s that we deserve the chance to not be the monster. 

(tldr: the real villain of this series is Toxic White Heterosexual Masculinity and izzy hands is its most beaten-down victim/tool.)

354 notes - Posted April 15, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

Alternative Timelines and Echoes: A Shadowgast Rec List

Hey everyone! This week we have nine incredible fics that are all about Alternative Timelines and Echoes. Recs under the cut, and as always, remember to comment or kudos if you liked them!

I always figured that I'd be the one to die alone by thesweetpianowritingdownmylife (6443,Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: Choose Not to Warn

Written pre-episode 97, Essek is travelling with the Nein and Caleb summons an echo of himself for watch. The echo version of Caleb is from a world where Essek died.

Reccer says: It's sweet and a little sad

the better version of our past by KmacKatie (kmackatie) (5840,Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

While casting the time spell with Caleb, Essek has a moment of glimpsing a number of different futures

Reccer says: I liked it!

Time Relentless Takes No Sides by PryingBlackbird, sociallychallengednerd, toneofjoy (15260,Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

A device discovered in Aeor upends everything. Caleb is trapped in an endless swirl of alternate timelines, and there seems to be no way out.

Reccer says: It's very gripping, and the exploration of all of the different Calebs and Brens is fascinating!

The Refraction of Verisimilitude by marsastronomica (16537,Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Choose Not to Warn

The second in a scourger AU series, Bren attempts to keep the upper hand as Essek's world is rocked by the presence of the Nein

Reccer says: It's very engaging and textured, with Essek and Bren being matched opponents - plus there is a very good scene involving Essek showing Bren what exactly an echo might be used for

small works of cosmic scale by mousecookie (2547,General) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek has a breakthrough he wants to share with Caleb. A breakthrough that apparently includes a snail.

Reccer says: I liked it!

In all worlds, nothing is immutable by CherryMilkshake (22265,Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek tries to travel through time, but instead finds himself in a world where he is happily involved with Caleb

Reccer says: I liked it!

Hang the Hourglass by Luckyowlsfoot (5723,Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: Major Character Death, Graphic Depictions of Violence

An alternate timeline's Essek has to step in to help in Aeor and Cognoza. he can't stay, however.

Reccer says: It hurts in just the right ways

And two fics each for:

reflections and other illusions of control (series) by atlasarcana (84220,Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Choose Not to Warn, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Dubcon/Consensual Non Consent

Essek and Caleb have bedroom issues and summon an echo. The Echo is from a timeline where Bren remained a Volstrucker. Soap opera relationship drama and cross-timeline espionage ensues.

Reccer 1 says: I like that it explores the idea of Bren vs. Caleb as different possible outcomes to the same childhood, and Essek vs. Shadowhand-Essek as different possible outcomes to the same adulthood with/without the Mighty Nein. Reccer 2 says: This fic series has everything. It's a wonderful character study through the means of kinky exploration between three (or...four?) people with incredibly tangled relationships with violence, shame and desire. Bren's characterizations is such a delight.

multitudinous echoes awoke and died in the distance by mousecookie (10003,Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: brief suicidal ideation

Caleb and Essek are summoned to an alternate timeline as Resonant Echoes of their evil selves, and fight to survive and get back.

Reccer 1 says: Cool concept and good emotional moments Reccer 2 says: It’s imaginative, fast-paced, and intense. The atmosphere is tense, and the visuals are really quite good.

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week's theme is Babygast, so get ready for some cute kids!

[proficientatfreakness]

Thabks for the tag! I did download them together from a post I reblogged recently they are a set do not separate!!1!

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife @emily84 @byrdierose @cuervosolsticio @chess-blackmyre @lethbrigadier @stampstamp

Why is Tumblr saying some people I want to tag don't exist even though I know for a fact you do!!! I see you on my notifications i carry you in my heart!!! So go ahead and consider this a blanket tag: if you see this, show me yours, I showed you mine 👀

last fictional character in ur camera roll just adopted u

(Yes I did do this only because I want him to adopt me. Fuck off)

tags: @cryptidwithaninternetconnection @reggie-the-inferi @gingerbreadeel24 @pickupstyx

and whoever the fuck sees this

[thesweetpianowritingdownmylife]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Wee John Feeney/Israel Hands, Wee John Feeney & Israel Hands Characters: Wee John Feeney, Israel Hands Additional Tags: Makeup, Flirting, Teasing, Missing Scene, Not Beta Read, i am so normal about these two Summary:

Wee John does Izzy's makeup.

[proficientatfreakness]

I posted 12,405 times in 2022

19 posts created (0%)

12,386 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@mystrothedefender

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife

@theluckythreeleafclover

@madmaudlingoes

@accidental-child

I tagged 1,041 of my posts in 2022

#ofmd - 299 posts

#our flag means death - 237 posts

#ofmd spoilers - 204 posts

#our flag means death spoilers - 136 posts

#ofmd meta - 83 posts

#stede bonnet - 62 posts

#ofmd fanart - 52 posts

#ed teach - 50 posts

#gentlebeard - 44 posts

#blackbonnet - 42 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i wouldve screencapped it all because every line is like a clown pulling infinite handkerchiefs but it's them just pulling wig after wig fro

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Dream and Hob Halloween date

Fics coming soon. I can feel it.

And after that, Dreamling christmas rom-coms.

40 notes - Posted September 30, 2022

#4

Stede’s first appearance as the Gentleman Pirate is all in pearly white and Ed’s last as Blackbeard is clad head to toe in black leather

I’m having a stroke

46 notes - Posted April 8, 2022

#3

Black Pete: To Blackbeard, killing's just like breathing.

Stede *unconvinced*

Mary: Love is just like breathing

Stede *awed smile*

60 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

#2

No but listen

What if Black Pete really was on Blackbeard’s crew and that’s why he’s the only one everyone hits?

The way he drops his guard again after having been hit already by Ivan

See the full post

331 notes - Posted April 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Mary, Alma and Louis are the Land, Stede is the Sea

355 notes - Posted June 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[frankpanioncube]

Fic: It’s Something You Earn

My gift for @ thesweetpianowritingdownmylife  for @undertalesecretsanta .  We have HAPPY! Papyrus and Flowey spending time together as friends. 

I have to admit I haven’t ever had to write Flowey when he wasn’t explicitly being a manipulative little git so I hope this is alright. 

Without further ado: Life on the surface is pretty great. Papryus has it all: Friends, family, a bright future ahead of him with plenty of opportunities, but someone’s missing....and oddly enough he seems to be the only one who knows it.  (Bonus points if you guess what show exactly Papyrus is paraphrasing.) 

The clock on the wall ticked into the two-o’clock position as the bored-looking grad student proctoring the exam at the front of the room practically leapt to their feet, subtracting another fifteen minutes from the countdown on the room's whiteboard before settling back into their seat at the front of the room. Only forty-five minutes remained and around Papyrus similar sounds of indecision were forthcoming from the students who remained, mixed with the frantic sounds of the desperate.

Papyrus was in fact on his third check through of his work. He knew he needn't have worried; he'd performed exceptionally well on the midterm and the case study and by his math already had secured the necessary minimum grade point requirement to advance in the program...if he chose to pick this as his major. He'd also learned long ago from one Captain Undyne never to give anything less than his absolute best...but surely three double checks was enough.

Having reached a decision, he folded his test booklet closed and brought it to the proctor who copied his student number off his ID card and wished him a ‘Happy Holidays’ under their breath..

After that, the door to the building soon clicked shut behind him, and he was free! Done! Well, that was, until next semester.

Papyrus allowed himself a short whoop, ignoring the stares, but was quick to move on. He was eager to get back to the house. Sans would be coming down today and he hadn't seen his brother in months. He didn't mind stopping at the coffee kiosk as an afterthought. He did after all have nearly 45 minutes, and when had his brother been early to anywhere?

The younger of the skeleton brothers had come to love University life. The Underground had been a little short on anyone in his age bracket and once the initial excitement of being above ground had worn off, he felt at a bit of a loss as to what to do with himself. Not because his options were limited but because suddenly there was a massive surplus of potential. Apparently, lots of humans felt the same way and University or College was one of the things the ones that most closely matched his own age did about it. He hadn't picked a major yet, but apparently most humans in their first year didn't either...and boy had this been a lot easier to get into than the guard. And then there was the Fraternity. Who knew that all this time that he'd thought Sans was just being annoying, he was actually secretly training him for his new brotherhood and friend-making experience! Why, hazing had been an absolute breeze compared to the quagmire that was his brother’s slovenly ways...

Speaking of whom, he picked out two frosted cookies as a ‘good to see you again’ gift and rushed through the holiday niceties with the cashier. Papyrus might be an independent academically minded, grown bones University student now, but he missed his big brother. Besides that, he knew he had the latest final time of any of the brothers and David, their chapter president couldn't leave himself until everyone else was finished and off to their homes for the holiday.

Moments later, he burst through the doors of the Beta Gamma Epsilon house to some very familiar laughter.

"Sans?"

If Sans was at least early, he probably wanted to get going home.

Papyrus ducked into the common room, to be greeted by the sight of David and Sans laughing, and, judging by the surrounding bottles, possibly more than a little drunk (but par the course for a Frat house, despite Papyrus' best efforts to keep the infernal empties confined to a recycle bin. They were worse than Sans’ socks.).

His brother seemed to have a few more worry lines around his sockets and his clothes seemed wrinklier than normal, but Papyrus was overwhelmingly glad to see him again. It had been too long.

"SANS!" he barked, only half meaning the admonishment. "You're drunk...and I have to drive!"

"That's...not how it works bro." Sans informed him, but he was laughing too.

"Here, I have cookies." Papyrus offered his bounty and a massive hug to Sans who accepted both gifts happily before Papyrus went to collect his packed suitcase from his room.

"Okay here you go." David had followed him, presenting him with an envelope. "Last one. Luckiest brother in the house."

The skeleton barked a laugh. "Nyeh heh! I am indeed a lucky brother!”

"Nah, guy in the envelope."

"Well I do suppose I am ALSO the coolest person to have as a secret santa!” Papyrus hefted his bags and took a harder glance over at the human. “Are you okay to drive?”

"Huh? Oh I’m going to my girlfriend’s before I go home. I’m not driving. And yeah, all the guys have been going on about which one of them is going to get to have some cool monster shit."

"Oh..."

"Damn, was that insensitive?"

"Well, the language was a little blue I suppose.”

David chucked a bit. “You’re a good guy, Papyrus. Have a happy holiday, dude.”

The older student was true to his word apparently, locking up the Beta house and marching out of the parking lot with only a slight waver to his step. Papyrus watched him go diligently (he was a good brother of course!), then loaded his suitcase into his car and Sans packed himself into the passenger side.

They drove in silence for awhile. Papyrus was just beginning to wonder if he should say something when Sans broke the silence, apparently feeling similarly.

Ya ain't worried about your test are ya bro?"

"The great Papyrus has no need to worry!"

“New roomies good?"

"Yeah!" He liked his other the other two pledges who shared his living quarters. “Mark and Derek are worthy human roommates!”  The latter of whom owned a fairly sizable action figure collection himself and had helped Papyrus to restore a few of the pieces he'd brought from his old home in Snowdin. “Well, ALL of the brothers are roommates you see! Although they are not brothers like you and I are, but brothers in SPIRIT!”

Apparently this was the correct response as Sans’ concerns slipped from Papyrus’ social life to more generic ‘older brother’ concerns

"What about your homework?"

"Brother, I am hardly a baby bones! I am already reading ahead for my next semester classes! I do not procrastinate like SOME skeletons!"

“Nothin’ wrong with a little procrastination.” Sans punctuated the remark with a stretch and raised a brow bone at the envelope. “That ain’t what I’m talkin’ about.”

"Oh That! It's a ‘Secret Santa'. It's a human thing. Everyone in the Fraternity gets someone's name who they have to buy a present for. Then we all have to try and guess who gave us what."

"Sounds right up your alley, bro. Bet you've got a real puzzle in mind."

"Naturally. I have to think of something excellent as my presents is required!”

“Good one, bro.”

“Only ten minutes with you and already I’m picking up on your bad pun habits.”

Papyrus stole a peek at Sans out of the corner of his eye who was presently leaning back in the seat, eye sockets closed. It seemed as though the pun deflection had worked the way he hoped it would.

Papyrus returned his eyes to the road, determined then and there that his little mission would remain a secret between he and himself. Papyrus knew it had been...less easy for Sans to adjust to life above ground. It was strange to think of his brother as the tightly wound, high strung one, but he finally started to be attempting to relax and Papyrus was not about to be the one to disturb that balance.

Everything surface-wise so far for Papyrus had been a joy to experience, but it felt odd. Like he alone was missing something...or more exactly; someone. It had become weirder still when it seemed he alone seemed to even notice. Papyrus knew his friends list wasn't exactly the biggest and longest in the underground, so he had never been dismissive of even the most distant acquaintances he did have. There was Sans and Undyne of course, and everyone knew them. There was the self-appointed President of his Fanclub, MK….and that right there was the thing. MK wasn't the president of his fanclub.

The present of his fanclub, or...the last president was...to put it frankly, missing. ...and no one seemed to know anything about him. He'd once in a fit of desperation even tried asking King Asgore who had only looked confused by the question and ended up bestowing on him about six tins of golden flower tea.  It was as if Papyrus was the only person who knew Flowey existed

Sans; the other person who knew everyone (or at least everyone who liked hot dogs, bad jokes and/or grease) had simply looked troubled when he was asked and mentioned something about having an imaginary friend as a Babybones he'd named Gaster...and dropped the subject shortly after. Papyrus had predictably insisted Flowey wasn’t his imaginary friend. Still Sans had simply apologized for the insinuation. That was odd too; his brother would normally never miss a chance to give his brother a little bit of the business for something as immature as clinging to a childhood imaginary playmate.  

It did however mark the last time he'd brought it up with other people, and he’d hoped to put it from his own mind now that he had studies and friends but somehow it kept creeping back in. In bed at night, During the lulls in conversation. In the middle of reading one of Sans’ or Frisk’s update e-mails about how life was at home. Now with an excuse to go to the Underground ready made, Papyrus had decided to personally put the issue to bed once and for all.

Whatever he was speculating he would find, there was little time to think about the plan further as the next few days flew by in a whirlwind of activity. Monsters were a bit behind on their Calendar due to the length of time spent in the Underground versus the actual advancements made in human understanding, and there had been a whole issue on when Gyftmas should be celebrated. The real thing by Monster Calendar fell mid-Hanukkah, but the traditions were evidently taken from Christmas. As it happened, Frisk had celebrated Hanukkah before they fell down, so Toriel had arranged for a gathering of course, the night Papyrus came home from school. It also worked out well for Sans’ Gyftmas present; a reservation for 'Christmas Day' at Grillby's newly instated surface version of his establishment.

He was a bit distracted that day by the time they got to the restaurant as inevitably the ‘plan’ as it was now officially titled in his mind and all that it entailed had crept into his thoughts once more. He wasn’t being deceitful, not really, but he wasn’t sure what the reaction would be if he did happen to casually mention it. As it happened, the person in the frat he was to buy a gift for was Brian, rather known for his legendary ability to drink someone under the table, not to mention being 'that one guy who would eat anything'. He was here, at a Monster Bar and he knew Grillby sold product that would go over well and fill the expectation to bring something ‘Monster-made’. He could just buy a small bottle of something or the other and forget the plan altogether. Being naturally honest by nature, it rankled with him that he felt he needed secrecy.

If he did that, it would be better for his brother’s SOUL.

And then he imagined Flowey, alone in the Underground, even though they were free, imagining Papyrus had forgotten him fore---.

"Hey, Bro...it’s your turn..."

With a gasp, Papyrus returned to reality, doing his best to refocus on the gift in front of him. Sans' gift too., no less.

"Uh, YES! THANK YOU BROTHER! I WAS JUST ...ADMIRING THE BEAUTIFUL WRAPPING JOB!"

Now THAT was a lie if there ever was one.

Fortunately, Toriel came to his rescue. "Oh that does remind me of when Asriel was small...I made him three whole boxes of his favourite cookies and knitted him a brand new jumper out of Spider silk. It really was darling, but of course, Asgore wound up eating the biscuits and those sharp little claws had pulled runs in the poor sweater by the next day." She chuckled, a touch sadly.

"Sounds a bit better than me." Grillby had finished clearing down and had joined the party, having kept the restaurant open for their group, which did after all did include his best mate and the Queen of all Monsters.  "My Niece Fuku used to eat the boxes. And the tissue paper."

Sans snorted with absolute delight. "Eating trash. A Monster after my own SOUL."

Papyrus put a hand on the wrapping paper and tore it off enthusiastically, and the evening proceeded.

He didn't think about the Plan again until two days later when all the excitement had officially wound down and he’d made his calls and wrote his thank you letters. Midway through comparing present notes, he was once more reminded he still had one present left to obtain.

>>oh and a gift certificate from Alphys and Undyne to a cosplay armour maker they found at a con they went to. They're going to make me a new Battle Body."

>>cool. Yeah dude, I'm going to bed. I'm super bombed right now. My Dad made Eggnog and it kinda makes the Betas look tame."

Papyrus bade his friend goodbye and flopped back on his bed. And that was that. Decisions made. Tomorrow...was the day.

He slept better than he thought he might.

As it happened, his excuse-which-wasn't -really-a-lie got out smoother than he thought it would.

"SANS?"

"Sup Bro?"

“I AM HEADING OUT TO PROCURE MY SECRET SANTA GIFT!"

"Have a good time." Sans called back from the kitchen.

"Bundle up warmly dear."  It is rather cold outside."

It eased Papyrus' nerves to know that Toriel was around to distract his brother. For her sake he added another scarf; the new one he'd received for Christmas and took his gloves with the peel-off mitten tops too.

He parked his car in the lot of a nearby grocery store that didn't have a time limit on how long people could spend in the space and walked to the chain coffee store at the end of the block. . Someone, he couldn't remember who, had given him a gift card for the place, which didn't have a shop on Campus.  He treated himself to something with god knew how much unhealthy sugar  and snapped a few photos of the monstrosity before he gathered his reserves of determination and began the true journey.

The nice, merchandise stores changed into gas stations and fast food joints, then into garages and the odd warehouse and then there was yet-untamed forest area that allowed him to know he was getting close. He finally spotted the turn he was after and veered off to the path they'd taken down the mountain A glance at his phone told him he was out of range of any human networks but a few steps later he had gotten onto what remained of the Undernet.

Some monsters still lived underground, like Gerson and those too old and unable or unwilling to make the journey.

He resolved to stay out of their way though. Undyne often visited the old turtle and something still niggled at him about this mission being ‘exposed’.

He consulted his clock. Even with his stopover at the coffee place, he'd made good time. He wouldn't risk the River Person.

Once Hotland had been cleared, it was much smoother sailing. He passed the dump, remembering when he and Sans used to come there for his Gyftmas gifts. He also picked some crab apples. In Snowdin he pottered around the old house, marvelling at the smell that had seeped in without anyone to clean it and let himself out (without discovering the long-molded spaghetti still in the fridge). He did however unstring the fairy lights from around the windows., winding them into a neat coil. Brian would appreciate the decorations for his room.

He hemmed about it for a while and finally let himself into Grillby's picking over the liquor that had been left. He selected one that was full and as an afterthought stuck some money under the register.  He could make sure the bartender knew about it later. After this was over.

Monster alcohol, monster food and a special decoration from his own home. Satisfied with the present, he sorted his finds into his inventory and sat himself down on the step of the old pub, leaning his chin in his glove with a quiet Nyeh.

He had been so sure that he would have attracted the attention of his old friend...that the flower would have followed him and popped up to scare him as he had the habit of doing, so many times during his youth.

There'd been no flash of gold in his periphery however though he'd spun to surprise CHECK many a time.

He pulled out his phone again.

Still...Papyrus was never one to do things halfway. He might be late to supper but...yet...

He moved deeper. Past Snowdin, into the forest...over the bridge and sparing a laugh at his embarrassing attempt at a 'gate'. Why, he'd taken Engineering 102 and he could build a gate twice as good.

He felt a little better for his self-congratulatory inner monologue and perhaps it was this that had given him the strength to march deeper into the ruins.

This was uncharted territory. His brother as he now knew had only knocked on the door and had been eager to leave without a backwards glance. Papyrus had never questioned that desire, nor thought about it.

It was peaceful there, at least and the puzzles were interesting, to be sure.

He found a mostly depleted bowl of Monster candy somewhere along the way and added a piece to his present for Brian, but was starting to grow somewhat hopeless about the status of the rest of his mission.

The doubts from earlier sprang to his mind., the odd conversations with Asgore, the reactions of Sans. He knew Sans didn't tell him everything, but perhaps it was true that there was nothing to  his behaviour after all.

Had he dreamed Flowey? It was...after all a childish name...They'd been 'presidents of eachothers fanclubs’, when Papyrus had no friends.

He was the Great Papyrus, and so must his imagination be very Great....but he was so...real.

"Ah?"

"Hello?"

Papyrus found himself talking to...a patch of flowers, but just now  had sure he'd seen white fur there too. The annoying Dog?

That might not surprise him; the puffball had followed them up to the surface and had become quite comfortable under Sans' care...it had only shown up twice at his Frat House, so he knew his brother was putting in effort.

He was this time however seeing things. The flowers were devoid of anything white...and what was more, this was it seemed, the end of his fruitless hunt, as there was a dead end and the hole through which Frisk had fallen down, just directly above him, bleeding in winter sun.

The Skeleton's shoulders slumped in spite of himself.

"Howdy."

Papyrus's eyes lit up. There was no mistaking that voice. He hadn't been crazy!

Taking sudden note of where he was standing, Papyrus skipped back off the edges of the flower patch.  

Sure enough, the little flower monster (Something in the back of Papyrus' mind told him that was wrong, that Flowey wasn't a monster...but then, what else would he be?) popped his head up through the blossoms, a full ‘head’ above the other flowers.

"Well well, the Great Papyrus is back to deign to pay little old me a visit..."

Papyrus knew Flowey well enough by now to ignore the edge to the flower's voice.

"Of course I did! I have been hoping to see my best friend for ages now!” Papyrus insiste sincerely.

"Ugh, you're so nice."

The initial shock and delight having passed, Papyrus  couldn't keep back the wave of confusion and hurt nor quite keep it out of his voice. "Why...why didn't you come to the surface? With all of us! You ....you could have stayed with us. Me and Sans...Or...Or Frisk. I know you were their friend too!"

For a brief second, Papyrus thought he saw something like sorrow flash across the flower's visage, before it was replaced by something else much nastier. "Because I just Love it down here sooo much Papyrus."

"Oh well then, I'll leave you to it, and you won't mind if I take a walk. It's a long trek back to the surface."

Flowey had been this way ever since the skeleton knew him. Sometimes the flower would say things that even Sans, an accomplished Physicist would have struggled to come up with, other times, he would be no more or less childish than the Snowdin kids who called HIM weird.

Predictably, Flowey shot down into the earth, just long enough  for Papyrus to decide maybe he had decided to go sulk after all, only to re-materialize right under his boot.

"Nyeh!" Papyrus was still Papyrus and though it was a narrow thing, his reflexes were still in good enough condition that he balanced back to avoid crushing his friend.

"Why must you always do that?" he admonished Flowey. "One of these days I will crush you into dust by accident!"

Flowey only giggled. "You must really hate me Papyrus, thinking to step on me with such LOVE that you'd dust me!"

"That's not what I meant!" Now Papyrus couldn't help but be offended by the insinuation.

"Oh, alright alright, don't cry." the flower groused.

Papyrus  hadn't been (really), but he brushed imaginary tears - it was most definitely just the falling snow!) from his eye sockets anyway.

"Come on, Climb up me!" the Skeleton insisted, holding out his arm for the flower.  "We cannot carry on a proper conversation as friends if you keep tunnelling underground like that."

Papyrus extended his arm and after a moment's deliberation, Flowey deigned to climb up., the flower's surprisingly extensive root system anchoring him to sit comfortably astride Papyrus' shoulder as the Skeleton's long strides took them swiftly back through the ruins.

"You might enjoy it you know." If you gave it a try."

"Gave what a try?"

"The surface of course." Papyrus repeated, knowing full well the flower knew exactly what he'd meant.

"I don't trust anything that walks on two legs."

Papyrus imperceptibly shook his head. It was classic Flowey, that much was a fact, but even he could tell that the jibes and jabs were falling a little flatter, that the old spark had been replaced by something that if the skeleton didn't know any better, he would have called resignation. As such, he responded in kind, merely inclining his head towards his passenger. "I walk on two legs." he reminded Flowey mildly.

A beat of silence reigned before a hint of the old spark came back into Flowey's face. "Yeah, but you're really bad at it!"

In a split second, a vine which had unfurled unnoticed behind Papyrus, bound his ankles loosely together and sent him tripping forward and frighteningly close to the edge of the bridge. The skeleton's hand shot forward instinctively, grasping to catch hold of the bar, but - in a flash of  further regret for his woefully terrible engineering skills from his formative years, the support was too far away.  His fingertips barely grazed it and the duo plummeted arse over teakettle down the steep slope, with Flowey clinging to his Papyrus-shaped toboggan.

The drop wasn't that far but the incline was steep and Papyrus immediately lifted his head out of the snow bank he'd ploughed face-first into to knock the grit and snow from his eye sockets.

The flower slithered off onto the snowbank to look down at him.

"Golly Papyrus, are you alright?"

"I..." and Papyrus cut himself off as he noticed the extent of the damage. Far from dusting, the impromptu spill down the hill had nevertheless twisted Papyrus' foot and ankle from it's socket.

"Oh...I'll never be able to climb back up like this..."

"Look at the bright side, pal." Flowey knotted his vines in a very good approximation of a nonchalant human shrug. "Now you can stay down here with me!"

Papyrus struggled himself into a sitting position, the injured leg stretched out in front of him. and gazed up into the grey haze of Snowdin's endless fall of magical snow. That grey would turn to navy soon, a sign that dusk was coming in the world above. He wondered how long it would take for Sans to panic over his lack of checking in. What would happen when the store he'd parked down shut its doors for the night and his car was still parked there. Would some random night security guard take down his licence plate call his house? Would  it be a tow company?

Would they figure it out that he'd gone to the Underground right away or would it take them days to come to that conclusion?

He fixed the flower with his steeliest gaze. "You kow my faamily's going to come looking fo r me."

"Of course they are."

Papyrus opened his mouth to protest that he had lots of friends now, dozens even. Dozens of dozens. More than Flowey...and it dawned on him that was, well...the whole issue. The crux of the problem. The missing piece of the puzzle.

"I can't fix you." the Flower sulked, looking at him askance like he was daring Papyrus to blame him outright.

"No?" Papyrus refused to take the bait and adjusted the way he’d propped himself against the side of the rock wall. "This isn't really going to change anything. Sans or someone will come for me...and I'll have to explain what I was doing down here."

"I..."

"Looking for a present to bring back to my assigned person for the gift exchange." Papyrus cut the flower off, freezing the onset of his scariest smile right off his face.

The manic fang-filled nightmare grin melted into something that Papyrus swore was familiar but somehow also could not remember seeing on the Flower's face at any point.  "You wouldn't tell them...about me?"

"No. I wouldn't." Papyrus said simply.

"Hee Hee, you're almost predictable Papyrus."  That translated in Flowey speak to 'Thank you, I appreciate it.”

Papyrus responded in kind."You're welcome."

"So what kind of crap did you get the humans anyway?"

Papyrus produced his inventory. Predictably the flower ignored the liquor with only a passing glance, but seemed intrigued by the choice of fairy lights "What are the lights for? It’s after Gyftmas, even I know that."

"I thought they could put them up in their room."

"Humans do that? Indoors?"

"Yeah Lots of them do that for decoration."

"Golly, that is cool!" You should have gotten something better than crab apples though, blegh."

"I got monster candy...and apples are at least a healthy snack!" Papyrus protested. "You and my brother both! There's nothing wrong with healthy food!"

"DON'T compare me to your brother!  Flowey screeched, but his outrage was genuinely false this time and the two of them fell about laughing a little bit.

"Just for that, I won't fix you."

Before Papyrus could react even the slightest; the flower's magic flared to life, the world melting away to the specific concentrated blackness and focus of an encounter. A dozen thoughts occured to Papyrus at once: to Check, to increase his defense, and even to attack, but  instead he focused on Flowey who apparently was not giving him a chance for any of it. The wave of green magic was knitting his bones together before he knew it,  and the snow and and magically replicated overcast atmosphere of Snowdin was shimmering back in.

Papyrus flexed his foot experimentally, finding to his delight that  the action caused him no more than the briefest of clicks as the magic that bound him finished knotting itself together.

"Thank you."  he hefted himself to his feet, with relief, wondering not for the first time  how Sans did it; sitting around like that all the time and doubly glad that the snow in question was mostly magic, or his trousers would have been feeling a lot more unpleasant...but it still left them at the bottom of a ravine.

"Well come on, let's see if becoming a school book nerd hasn't made you go soft."

Flowey's thick roots shot upwards and again, Papyrus found himself having little trouble questioning his innate knowledge that the vines would support him easily, despite being sure he had no frame of reference...maybe. Possibly.

"The Great Papyrus would never let something like books get in the way of his training!"

He used the wide, flat thorns and coils as foot holds to slowly but surely, hand over hand make his way back to the top..

It was hard work and by the time he finally managed to heft his arm over the foot path of the bridge, he was heaving with exhaustion. He leaned against the strut to catch his breath, and busied himself as Flowey wound himself cobra-like  up the same path, the long vines shrinking as though they'd never been and he was nothing more than a facsimile of a golden flower once more.

They were silent a moment.

"It's not going to go back to the way it was." The flower intoned at length, his usual bobbing slowing to an introspective sort of sway.

Papyrus privately agreed.. He had checked his friend and that was something he knew he wouldn't unsee.

"No..." he began.

Something seemed to resolve in Flowey and it sparked something in Papyrus as well. He got the drop on Flowey this time, opening his mouth and speaking before he overthought it too much.

“You know...there are many humans that say you aren’t born with a soul. You earn one through facing adversity and overcoming obstacles and the decisions you make in your life. Kind of like you, just now.”

“Did you hear that from your human school?” the flower scoffed, though from the lack of follow up disparaging comments Papyrus knew he was both considering the statement and not angry with Papyrus for acknowledging the situation.

“Actually I got that from a human television show. But yes, it’s taught. It’s called ‘philosophy’”

“Even though they must know now that souls are real?”

“...Yes. I think it’s like LOVE and love.”

Flowey was silent another beat. “If I don’t want to come back to the surface...ever, will you still come to visit me?”

“Of course! We’re friends. Best friends.”

“Even after…’

“Pushing me off a bridge?”

“Y...yeah. Pushing you off a bridge.”

“Or any of the other stuff.”

Flowey’s expression shifted briefly to one of shock before he recovered himself and started to laugh. “Papyrus, that’s why I like you!”

“Maybe you can give some pointers to the new President of my fanclub.”

“That los--”

Papyrus looked at him.

“He’s probably doing a great job.”

“Yeah.”

***

Two Years Later:

"BROOOO!"

Papyrus  looked up from the project he was working on grateful for the distraction. His nasal bone had been inches away from his drafting table  and the proximity to the table wasn't exactly helping him work out the kinks in the design.

"COME ON! TWO DOLLAR SHOTS NIGHT! PLEDGES ARE BUYINNNNNG!”

"Yeah! yeah! Take a break at least!"

Papyrus still wasn't exactly known for being the booziest guy in the house or the biggest advocate of the party time, but the idea of stepping away from this work for awhile was a very tempting offer.

"Um...Go ahead." he told the brothers. "I will be sure to grace you with my GLORIOUS presence shortly!"

In spite of his resolve to try to focus on his work for another hour yet, the Skeleton found himself putting away his books and rolling up his blueprints. almost immediately after he heard the large group 's multitude of voices muffled by the door shutting behind them. He made no move to run after them, drumming his fingers on the tabletop in an uncharacteristic display of stagnation.

"Hmph. I can see these lazy human slackers have rubbed off on you. Sitting here staring into space."

The burst of intuition that had him eager to push off the outing suddenly made sense, and Papyrus picked up on the usual banter without missing a beat as easily as if they spent everyday together. "I WAS MOST CERTAINLY NOT BOONDOGGLING!" he screeched in mock anger, stomping his foot...to give him a leveraging anchor to heft the immensely heavy old bedroom window up far enough to allow his friend access. As a third year he' was now eligible for a single private room in the house, but it hardly mattered now as the housemates were long on their way to their campus event by now and those that had not gone probably assumed he was chatting with Undyne again. The flower was contained to his windowsill fern it seemed with no magic soil to move in, but Papyrus had offered his arm as he had in the Underground years ago.

The vines coiled around him and the Skeleton felt something. Something more than determination, a small thing that was not quite magic, and more like a shadow than anything but still tangible and barely there but like a candle guttering doggedly away with the urge to grow stronger.

It was what had brought Papyrus back to see Flowey that first Gyftmas above ground and what had brought him back after that...and finally what had brought him above ground for the first time tonight.

And that was enough.

[proficientatfreakness]

Psst Rummi is gay @thesweetpianowritingdownmylife

Looking through buttons on the Canadian gay archives and just found my favourite one. It's called "Gay Moon. Button."

[westiec]

I am excited to reveal the art piece I did for the MDZS Summer Solstice Bang!

This was my first time doing a fandom event as an artist! I'd like to say a huge thank you to my wonderful paired author @thesweetpianowritingdownmylife for being fantastic to work with as well as to the Summer Solstice mods for all their work running such an excellent event!

Be sure to check out the amazing story this piece accompanies here: a song that we’d never heard

And peruse the rest of the Summer Solstice works here!

[Image ID: A digital drawing of a framed triptych. The left panel shows Song Lan, a merman with a silver and black tail seated on an underwater rock and holding a red thread. The right panel shows Xiao Xingchen, a cultivator in white robes holding sword, on the deck of a junk-style sailboat. The center panel shows Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen, now wearing a white blindfold, from the waist up in the water at sunset. Xiao Xingchen is smiling and Song Lan is looking at him and reaching out to steady him. At the top of the center panel, Xue Yang, a mer with black and red tentacles and a gold shell necklace, looms over the scene with his tentacles wrapped around the frame.]

[winepresswrath]

What about...jc and wwx getting cursed. The curse is that they cannot go further than 10m away from each other, or they suffer horrible pain. Maybe they have to reconcile to break the curse, and if they refuse to talk about it or argue, the distance gets smaller.

I love a good proximity curse. The idea that every time they argue their tether gets shorter is particularly fun, because a) it allowed me to imagine them spitefully smushed up against each other b) we can say the corollary is that when they cooperate the magical tether gets longer c) at some point they start trying to sabotage it a little on purpose, but because they’re both doing it the sabotage counts as working together. They are eventually forced to confront the implications of their lengthening magical leash. Is there anything more in character for either of them than accidentally sabotaging themselves while deliberately trying to sabotage themselves in a different way?

[xiyaoism]

Hey! Do you have any fic recs for a xiyao fic where jgy gets resurrected? (I mean in his body, more than going the wwx route). Or hell, 3zun where they BOTH get resurrected, and both decide to put the differences aside and go get their man?

So, lovely folks who follow this blog. Can somebody of you help out?

Is such a fic out there in the vast wide world of AO3? I personally only remember that I have seen a prompt for it on the kink meme a few days ago (if I remember correctly, that is) but just because I haven’t seen such a fic doesn’t mean it’s not around somewhere.

Pls, if you know of such a story... let OP know :)

[proficientatfreakness]

@thesweetpianowritingdownmylife it you

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