#<- our other two brothers said no nd i kinda dont feel like just doing duo bs

[gemharvest]

Feeling obligated to play a game with my brother sucks I don't even wanna do it so it's kinda ruining my mood. Which is funny, it's a game you would THINK it wouldn't ruin my mood, but I only wanna do hyperfixation shit. :/

[pinyeti]

overwhelming day today here's the debrief

I have two humongous final projects both worth half my grade due on Wednesday and im losing my mind AND I HAVE A PAPER DUE TOMORROW MORNING AT 8AM AND I HAV.E AMIDTERM TOMORROW AT 3.30Pn, my groups suck for both projects and THEY JUST

MY GOD

I DONT MIND DOING ALL THW WORK EXCEPT IM GENUINELY SO FUCKIN TIRED OF DOING ALL THE FUCKIN WORK ALL THE FUCKING TIME AND IM SO SICK OF IT AND IM SO FUCKIN SICK OF IT IM SO FUCIN TIRED OF DOING THIS ALL THE FUCKIN TIME

and I just

I have this friend who im kinda close too but she's curt with me sometimes and we are kinda rude to each other as a joke but she just

she's rude to me sometimes on purpose and I dont know why and I just feel like she hates me and won't tell me why and I JUST I do love her and it bothers me ig and Ive had alot of issues with this friend and every time I try to solve anything

yeah

and I am having a huge body image attack which isn't that deep but whatever and my brother wlel

he's got every mental illness on the planet and makes my life a living hell I get being mentally ill makes life difficult for you but YOU CANNOT EXPECT ME TO SEE THEM AS MORE THAN EXPLANATIONS FOR YOUR BEHAVIOUR RATHER THAN A FUCKIN EXCUSE?? IM NOT EXCUSING YOU TELLING ME YOU WANT ME T

pk

okay and then

today was another friends birthday and she was so

we made a whole birthday surprise thing for her and I went to alot of effort to do it and she just I invited her boyfriend and one of her other friend and she sprent the whole time talking to them and making it awkward for everyone else and I

she was like send pictures? and it just bothered me cuz she went out of her way to make it look like she hated them and if thats so then ill just not invite her to things??? cuz wth I do like my friends and this is really fuckin inconsiderate and we had karaoke but there was an issue with the mic and she was just

being really weird about ti and I felt kinda disrespected and she really doesnt fuckin care

and im so sick of this and

its like she just tolerates them for pictures and it was weird and idk

maybe I dont like her as much as I thought and maybe im the problem cuz I really tried to make it special for her and she just

she was just not having it and I tried so hard and I wish I didnt cuz I felt so stupid for caring about mics cuz when she left the rest of us were singing nd it wasn't awkward and clean up was fun even

and the thing with happened with the friend that was curt with me earlier she just we found out a guy we knew was spreading rumors about her sexuality ( his friend group did this to me first) so I asked her about it and she said yea that guy confessed to her and she told him she didnt like him like that but also that her and my other friend fought cuz this guy was being weird and I was BUSY BABYSITITNG MY FUCKIN GROUP AT THE TIME AND WE COULDNT PROPERLY TALK ABOUT IT so I called her when I got home and she got so weird and defensive about it like I was crazy and I just

I hate when she does this and I hate that I care about her more than she cares about me

in fact I know this is toxic as fuck and caring isnt measured on scales

bUT I HAVE THIS PROBLEM

I DO

I CARE TOO FUCKIN MUCH AND I WISH I COULD STOP AND I WISH I COULD EAT MY BRAIN UP CUZ IM SO SICK OF CARING OHMYGOD I WISH I COULD JSUT END MY FUC

OH AND

IM DOING 2 MURALS RIGHT

BUT MY IPAD CRASH LEFT ONE OHUGE FUCKIN MURAL GONE FOREVER

AND I DONT HAVE THE 720CM VERSION OF IT AND I HAVENT TOLD THEM YET AND

AND I HATE MY ART AND

I am president of a club and WE GOT OUR FUCKIN BUDGET REJECTED SO IM OUT A BUNCH OF MONEY FOR NO REASON AND IM SO SICK

I need a break

I need a break

[mommamouf]

Sista

Im At work doin my work shit and decided id greet customers today. One particular customer walked in, I gave her a very happy and welcoming greeting and she kind of brushed me off. I didn't trip off of it just went back to doin what I was doin. So the same customer later on ask me about this sale. So I'm like I'm not sure let me go ask. She stops me and is like "do you know me?" I smiled and politely said no but in my head I'm like FUCK this some chic from high school or a party and idk wtf I did. So she goes "I'm so nd so and so nd so's sister" tool me Hellas cuz I'm in party brain memory and then it hit me. MY SISTER'S SISTER! MY sister. My actual real life older sister.

So the thing is i always wanted more siblings. I didn't really like being the oldest, my younger sister might be part demon. So when I was younger my mom would tell me all the time "I got an older brother and sisters out there somewhere" and the thought of it really use to excite me. Never actually planned on meeting them one day and now these mf just KEEP poppin up.

Anyways she went for a handshake and I hugged her instead (I was excited) we talked for two seconds. She said how she sees me all the time but never knew what to say. They all did actually. They'd see and know me cuz I think they looked it up one day or sum shit. Point is tgey would know but never say hi. I'm glad they all finally did/do.

So nearing the end of our convo she goes "You didn't miss out on anything" with this very sincere look. And it took me a min to understand what she meant. She was talking about HIM. She's the oldest so she saw and actually experienced my our father. I on the other hand have only seen a picture of the man. And she kinda kept saying it. I guess trying to comfort that kid in me but the thing is I'm not longing for him and i guess I always knew there was nothing i missed out on. Yeah as a kid I had my days where it's was like damn I really wish he was around but that was mainly for my mom. I felt like life would be a whole lot easier if he was around to help her and if be less of a burden. My sister's dad wasnt around but he was still "involved" as much as he could be. But I didn't miss him or want him around. He NEVER once made the effort to see me and I got over that at a young age. Like you do wanna meet me or even see me cool, now I know you dont give af so aint no point of me feeling those extra ads emotions. He was sloppy and gross enough to have a whole family, cheat and get two women pregnant at the same time. Again, one of my sisters is only 5 DAYS older than me. So again that speaks for your character. And to find out he walked out on his kids while they were young and never came back. At that point my mind was set. I was waaaaaaay better off without him and I might even have gotten lucky by not knowing him at all. It's just that the way she said it makes it seem like some bad shit went down. She even said his brothers are good ppl but him and the rest of his family are not. Now my curiosity has peaked and I just want to know more. Like what is this other side like. Anyways I thought it was cool but a part of me also feels like they(my siblings) aren't as interested in developing a relationship with me as I am with them. Then again that could be my paranoia.

[fanfic-factory]

Love at First Sight (Chapter 34)

P.o.v Ross Ellington and I finished our food and decided we would head over to my place to see what the others were up to. i drove up the driveway with Ellington following right behind in his car. we took separate cars because we wanted to stay as low profile as possible but if paparazzi caught what i did back at the restaurant i guess our secrets out. I got out of my car followed by Ellington getting out of his. we walked into the house o find chelsie and Rydel with their arms wrapped around each other ads they cried into each other's shoulders for a second i was a bit confused but then i realized that rocky had probably slipped up and told at least one of them and then the one he told probably told the other. walked over to chelsie and tried to give her a kiss but she stopped me. 'damn it! she does know!' i thought to myself and right on cue she yells in my face "how could you!" mean while Rydel is yelling at Ellington. 'god i am going to beat the living shit out of Rocky when i find him!' i think to myself as chelsie continues to yell at me. eventually Rydel and chelsie stopped yelling at us. im happy because we now have a chance to explain and i also want to make sure that they don't hate us forever, especially Rydel and Ellington because that could ruin the band and i don't want to let any of our fans down. Ellington and i finally got a chance to explain to chelsie and Rydel at happened and why we didn't tell them sooner and that we were sorry from keeping all of this from them. im actually really shocked at how understanding they were. I'm happy that they understand because all i can say is love is love and because of Ellington i am strong (reference to strong by one direction) I'm kinda shocked about how understanding they were though because of how they went all ape shit on us not even five minutes ago. p.o.v Rydel right after i told chelsie that the both of us were being cheated on be both burst into tears and then Ross and Ellington came through the door it took us both a few seconds to realize that it was them because our vision was blurry because of our tears. When we did reslize it was them though we both instantly went from tears to pure rage. Ross then walked up to chelsie and tried to kiss her. At this point we had both had enough of the secrets and lies and just went full on ape shit at them because of what they have put us through. we kept yelling and yelling at the two of them until we felt they have had enough. after we finished yelling at them they made us sit down so they could explain it all. it made sense but even though i was understanding it would take a while for them to gain my trust back again. p.o.v chelsie After ross and Ellington explained everything to us my emotions were so messed up. i wanted to kiss ross but he's not mine anymore, i wanted to yell at him but my voice was basically gone from already yelling at him, i wanted to just hide away from the world and die because i lost the love of my life. he's not mine anymore i wish i could just back off but its not that easy. i couldn't bear to look at him for one more second or hear one more word come out of his mouth so i left. i got up and left. p.o.v Keara i was sitting in my room texting riker. i had asked if i could go to his place to hang out but he told me what had happened between chelsie, ross, Rydel,and Ellington and then the idea of hanging out at his place all of a sudden didn't seem so great. then i asked him if he wanted to come over to my place to hang out. he actually replied so fast it is literally as if e would have done anything to get out of that house and after hearing what was going on there i can imagine why. i decided that for once i would actually socialize with my family before my boyfriend got here so i went to the living room. when i walked into the living room i saw that they were watching the Big Bang theory. since i love the Big Bang theory i decided i would sit and watch it with my family. was the episode where raj had this competition set up and the rest of the group of friends was split into teams of two. right when and Howard and amy realized that the one thing they have in common is loving Neil diamond iker walked in singing along to sweet caroline. p.o.v Riker i pulled up to keara's house and got out of the car. i walked up to the door and walked right in because her house is basically a second home to me. i walked in and i didnt know what they were watching but i did recognize something. i recognized the song that was playing on whatever it was they were watching so i decided to just walk into the living room singing along to sweet caroline by Neil diamond. after i finished singing she stood up and walked over to me so she could hug me. Then i kissed her. i was well aware that her parents were standing right there but that wouldnt stop me from kissing my amazingly perfect girlfriend. her dad kind of gave me a look that made me think he was going to comment on what i had just done. He didnt end up saying anything though so i payed no mind to it. Her mother than said hi to me and continued to act like nothing had happened. after the slight awkwardness we just all decided to watch the rest of the episode of the Big Bang theory. after the episode ended we snuck off to keara's room. p.o.v Rachel i was sitting at home playing my guitar and singing for the baby because i feel that it would be better for the baby as appose to just talking to it. i was getting a bit bored because i was home alone. parents were both at work and my sister was hanging out with her boyfriend ho might i add is not nearly as cool as rocky. when i thought about that it gave me an idea. i grabbed my phone and texted rocky "hey babe can i come over im a little lonely" he replied quite quickly saying "i dont know if thats such a good idea how about i go over to your place. ill explain everything when i get there. love you" i read the text and a huge smile was spread on my face. the reason behind that being that i havent seen rocky in a while and its kinda weird without him. i decided to watch Austin and Ally while i waited for Rocky to get here. i was super happy when i found out which episode was because it was my favourite episode, Austin and alias. My favourite part or the episode was about to happen 'yay!!!' i thought to myself. my favourite part of the episode is when austin swings ally aka Roxy over his shoulder and walks away . rocky walked in literally seconds before it happened. basically saying the first thing he saw when he walked into the livingroom was me laughing like a complete loser. "nice! watching my brother on tv?" he asks while chuckling to himself. "yeah! you got a problem with that?" i asked him sarcastically. "no" he replies as he sits down next to me, outs his arm around my waist, and kisses the side of my head. after the episode ended he asked me if i wanted to have a movie marathon of random movies and of course i said yes. i picked out three movies to start while rocky got the food ready. the movies i had chosen where pitch perfect, cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2 and frozen. the first movie we decided to watch was cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2. personally i love this movie so much because its hilarious and all my favorite parts happen in a chain reaction type thing. After watching cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2 we decided to watch frozen. I absolutely love frozen. it is such a cute and funny movie and olaf is absolutely hilarious. my two favorite parts about frozen e when olaf sings his song about summer and when he says 'ohh, look at that. i've been impailed' and finally after frozen we watched pitch perfect. i would narrow the movie down to my favorite part but it is kind of hard to do considering the whole movie is absolutely hilarious. if i had to choose one part that would be my favorite i would have to say the riff off because the riff off consists of a bunch of really good songs that are made even better in the movie. after watching pitch perfect we realized it was getting really late. "babe can you stay here tonight? i get really lonely when both my parents work and besides i havent seen you in a while and i miss you" i said sounding a bit needy but t doesnt really matter cause im not exactly afraid to admit that i can be a bit needy at times. "sure babe id love to stay with you tonight! let me just go back to my house quickly to get some things and ill be back soon. love you. he kissed the side of my head and left. i decided i would get ready for bed while he was gone to get his stuff. i quickly put on some pyjamas and brushed my teeth. i took a quick drink of water and by the time i had finished all of this rocky was walking through my door again. he quickly got ready for bed and curled up next to me under the sheets. e were lying down in bed and his arms were wrapped around me. usually that would be enough to put me to sleep at a time like this but apparently tonight that wasnt enough. "hey babbe?" i said hoping he woulld still be awake and to my luck he was. "yeah babe?" he said semi curiously. "i cant sleep. could you maybe sing a little because i think it might help." the next thing you know he was singing half a heart by one direction because he knows how much i love that song nd also its a softer song so it made it easy to fall asleep. He kept singing the song as he kept singing i kept getting closer and closer to being asleep and then eventually the sound of his amazing voice just faded away.

[fanfiction-mania]

Love at First Sight (Chapter 34)

P.o.v Ross

Ellington and I finished our food and decided we would head over to my place to see what the others were up to. i drove up the driveway with Ellington following right behind in his car. we took separate cars because we wanted to stay as low profile as possible but if paparazzi caught what i did back at the restaurant i guess our secrets out. I got out of my car followed by Ellington getting out of his. we walked into the house o find chelsie and Rydel with their arms wrapped around each other ads they cried into each other's shoulders for a second i was a bit confused but then i realized that rocky had probably slipped up and told at least one of them and then the one he told probably told the other. walked over to chelsie and tried to give her a kiss but she stopped me. 'damn it! she does know!' i thought to myself and right on cue she yells in my face "how could you!" mean while Rydel is yelling at Ellington. 'god i am going to beat the living shit out of Rocky when i find him!' i think to myself as chelsie continues to yell at me. eventually Rydel and chelsie stopped yelling at us. im happy because we now have a chance to explain and i also want to make sure that they don't hate us forever, especially Rydel and Ellington because that could ruin the band and i don't want to let any of our fans down. Ellington and i finally got a chance to explain to chelsie and Rydel at happened and why we didn't tell them sooner and that we were sorry from keeping all of this from them. im actually really shocked at how understanding they were. I'm happy that they understand because all i can say is love is love and because of Ellington i am strong (reference to strong by one direction) I'm kinda shocked about how understanding they were though because of how they went all ape shit on us not even five minutes ago.

p.o.v Rydel

right after i told chelsie that the both of us were being cheated on be both burst into tears and then Ross and Ellington came through the door it took us both a few seconds to realize that it was them because our vision was blurry because of our tears. When we did reslize it was them though we both instantly went from tears to pure rage. Ross then walked up to chelsie and tried to kiss her. At this point we had both had enough of the secrets and lies and just went full on ape shit at them because of what they have put us through. we kept yelling and yelling at the two of them until we felt they have had enough. after we finished yelling at them they made us sit down so they could explain it all. it made sense but even though i was understanding it would take a while for them to gain my trust back again.

p.o.v chelsie

After ross and Ellington explained everything to us my emotions were so messed up. i wanted to kiss ross but he's not mine anymore, i wanted to yell at him but my voice was basically gone from already yelling at him, i wanted to just hide away from the world and die because i lost the love of my life. he's not mine anymore i wish i could just back off but its not that easy. i couldn't bear to look at him for one more second or hear one more word come out of his mouth so i left. i got up and left.

p.o.v Keara

i was sitting in my room texting riker. i had asked if i could go to his place to hang out but he told me what had happened between chelsie, ross, Rydel,and Ellington and then the idea of hanging out at his place all of a sudden didn't seem so great. then i asked him if he wanted to come over to my place to hang out. he actually replied so fast it is literally as if e would have done anything to get out of that house and after hearing what was going on there i can imagine why. i decided that for once i would actually socialize with my family before my boyfriend got here so i went to the living room. when i walked into the living room i saw that they were watching the Big Bang theory. since i love the Big Bang theory i decided i would sit and watch it with my family. was the episode where raj had this competition set up and the rest of the group of friends was split into teams of two. right when and Howard and amy realized that the one thing they have in common is loving Neil diamond iker walked in singing along to sweet caroline.

p.o.v Riker

i pulled up to keara's house and got out of the car. i walked up to the door and walked right in because her house is basically a second home to me. i walked in and i didnt know what they were watching but i did recognize something. i recognized the song that was playing on whatever it was they were watching so i decided to just walk into the living room singing along to sweet caroline by Neil diamond. after i finished singing she stood up and walked over to me so she could hug me. Then i kissed her. i was well aware that her parents were standing right there but that wouldnt stop me from kissing my amazingly perfect girlfriend. her dad kind of gave me a look that made me think he was going to comment on what i had just done. He didnt end up saying anything though so i payed no mind to it. Her mother than said hi to me and continued to act like nothing had happened. after the slight awkwardness we just all decided to watch the rest of the episode of the Big Bang theory. after the episode ended we snuck off to keara's room.

p.o.v Rachel

i was sitting at home playing my guitar and singing for the baby because i feel that it would be better for the baby as appose to just talking to it. i was getting a bit bored because i was home alone. parents were both at work and my sister was hanging out with her boyfriend ho might i add is not nearly as cool as rocky. when i thought about that it gave me an idea. i grabbed my phone and texted rocky "hey babe can i come over im a little lonely" he replied quite quickly saying "i dont know if thats such a good idea how about i go over to your place. ill explain everything when i get there. love you" i read the text and a huge smile was spread on my face. the reason behind that being that i havent seen rocky in a while and its kinda weird without him. i decided to watch Austin and Ally while i waited for Rocky to get here. i was super happy when i found out which episode was because it was my favourite episode, Austin and alias. My favourite part or the episode was about to happen 'yay!!!' i thought to myself. my favourite part of the episode is when austin swings ally aka Roxy over his shoulder and walks away . rocky walked in literally seconds before it happened. basically saying the first thing he saw when he walked into the livingroom was me laughing like a complete loser. "nice! watching my brother on tv?" he asks while chuckling to himself. "yeah! you got a problem with that?" i asked him sarcastically. "no" he replies as he sits down next to me, outs his arm around my waist, and kisses the side of my head. after the episode ended he asked me if i wanted to have a movie marathon of random movies and of course i said yes. i picked out three movies to start while rocky got the food ready. the movies i had chosen where pitch perfect, cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2 and frozen. the first movie we decided to watch was cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2. personally i love this movie so much because its hilarious and all my favorite parts happen in a chain reaction type thing. After watching cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2 we decided to watch frozen. I absolutely love frozen. it is such a cute and funny movie and olaf is absolutely hilarious. my two favorite parts about frozen e when olaf sings his song about summer and when he says 'ohh, look at that. i've been impailed' and finally after frozen we watched pitch perfect. i would narrow the movie down to my favorite part but it is kind of hard to do considering the whole movie is absolutely hilarious. if i had to choose one part that would be my favorite i would have to say the riff off because the riff off consists of a bunch of really good songs that are made even better in the movie. after watching pitch perfect we realized it was getting really late. "babe can you stay here tonight? i get really lonely when both my parents work and besides i havent seen you in a while and i miss you" i said sounding a bit needy but t doesnt really matter cause im not exactly afraid to admit that i can be a bit needy at times. "sure babe id love to stay with you tonight! let me just go back to my house quickly to get some things and ill be back soon. love you. he kissed the side of my head and left. i decided i would get ready for bed while he was gone to get his stuff. i quickly put on some pyjamas and brushed my teeth. i took a quick drink of water and by the time i had finished all of this rocky was walking through my door again. he quickly got ready for bed and curled up next to me under the sheets. e were lying down in bed and his arms were wrapped around me. usually that would be enough to put me to sleep at a time like this but apparently tonight that wasnt enough. "hey babbe?" i said hoping he woulld still be awake and to my luck he was. "yeah babe?" he said semi curiously. "i cant sleep. could you maybe sing a little because i think it might help." the next thing you know he was singing half a heart by one direction because he knows how much i love that song nd also its a softer song so it made it easy to fall asleep. e kept singing the song as he kept singing i kept getting closer and closer to being asleep and then eventually the sound of his amazing voice just faded away.