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mononijikayu · 5 months ago

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lay your love on me — nanami kento.

You bit your lip to keep from laughing as you prepared to drop your bombshell. “You know how I’m always worried about you being a sorcerer and putting yourself in danger?” He nodded, clearly not seeing where you were going with this. “Yes, you’ve mentioned that a few times.” “Well,” you continued, struggling to keep a straight face, “I’ve come up with the perfect solution to that problem.” “And what’s that?” Kento asked, raising an eyebrow. “I think you should quit being a sorcerer and become my house–husband instead,” you announced with a grin.

GENRE: alternate universe - canon convergence;

WARNING/S: romance, marriage, nsfw, rated 18 and above, explicit content, kissing, making out, fingering, p to v sex, orgasm, humor, possessive behaviour, protectiveness, jealousy, characters speaking in sexual innuendo, mention of sexual euphemisms, depiction of explicit sexual content, nanami kento is that MAN, reader petitions for nanami to be her house husband;

WORD COUNT: 5.4k words.

NOTE: i hope this makes up for the fact that i've been writing a lot of angsty fics. this was supposd to be a baywatch thing. but i changed my mind. anyway, i'll be doing the side - 900 works in advance. i hope you enjoy this!!! from this point, i might be slower in updating because i'll be back to uni again and probably will be a little bit more busy. thank you for reading and always enjoy this one too!!! i love you <3

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HE’S NOT PROUD OF THE MAN HE’S BECOME. But it’s hard for him, when it comes to you, his precious wife. Nanami Kento had always considered himself above petty emotions like jealousy. He was calm, rational, the kind of man who could look at the world with a level head.

Yet, ever since he met you, ever since he’s fallen for you, built his life, his universe about you — his life had taken a turn he hadn't anticipated. You brought out something in him that was unfamiliar and unsettling—a possessiveness, an insecurity that gnawed at him whenever he saw the way others looked at you.

As he sat next to you on the sun-kissed beach, the warm Malaysian sunbathing you both in a golden glow, Nanami Kento found it difficult to fully relax. This was supposed to be your quality time, the belated honeymoon you both had both worked so hard to carve out from your hard and demanding schedules. For once, he had managed to take time off from his life as a sorcerer, a rare break that was meant to be a celebration of your love, their commitment to each other.

You were just as busy as he was, if not more. As a lawyer, you were brilliant, successful, and independent. You made more than he did, something that had never bothered him—until now. Not because of pride, but because it made him realize just how much you had to offer. You could have anyone, and yet you had chosen him. The thought should have been reassuring, but instead, it only added to his insecurity.

Instead of peace, he found himself caught up in a swirl of emotions he couldn’t quite shake. It wasn’t just his possessiveness—it was the realization that, for the first time in his life, he was vulnerable. He was vulnerable because he loved you so deeply, because the thought of losing you, or of someone else taking your attention, filled him with a fear he didn’t know how to handle.

Kento couldn’t tear his eyes away from you as you lay on the sunbed, basking in the warm Malaysian sun. The way the golden rays kissed your skin, making it glow, had him utterly captivated. You were wearing the tightest two-piece bikini, a vibrant floral design that contrasted beautifully against your sun-kissed skin. The colors brought out the vibrancy of your figure, accentuating every curve in a way that made his heart race.

He watched as you stretched languidly, your body moving with a grace that seemed almost otherworldly to him. The sunlight danced across your skin, highlighting the delicate contours of your body, the subtle rise and fall of your chest as you breathed, the curve of your waist, the length of your legs.

Every inch of you was perfection in his eyes, and it drove him mad how stunning you were. But it wasn’t just your physical beauty that had him so entranced; it was the knowledge that you were his, that this incredible, breathtaking person had chosen him.

His gaze lingered on your face, where a peaceful smile played on your lips, your eyes closed as you enjoyed the warmth of the sun. The gentle breeze teased a few strands of your hair, brushing them across your forehead, and he had to resist the urge to reach out and tuck them behind your ear. He loved these quiet moments, where he could just watch you, memorize the way you looked in the golden light, the way the sun turned your hair into a halo of warmth.

You were the most beautiful being to ever exist to him, and the thought made his chest tighten with a mix of pride and disbelief. How had he been so fortunate? What had he done to deserve someone like you in his life?

The longer he watched you, the more he felt that familiar, possessive edge creeping in. It was a feeling he wasn’t entirely comfortable with, one that he had never experienced before you came into his life. He had never thought of himself as the jealous type, but when it came to you, something primal and protective stirred within him. He didn’t want anyone else to look at you the way he did, to see what he saw, to appreciate the way you made the world a brighter, more beautiful place just by existing.

And yet, as he sat there, he knew that others couldn’t help but notice you too. It was impossible not to. You were radiant, magnetic, and he could see the way people’s gazes lingered on you, the appreciative looks that followed you whenever you walked by. He clenched his jaw, fighting the urge to do something irrational, to pull you close and stake his claim in front of everyone.

Kento could see the way men’s eyes lingered on you, the admiration in their gazes as they took in your beauty. It made his blood boil in a way he wasn’t proud of. He wanted to stand up, to make it clear that you were his, that no one else had the right to look at you like that. But he stayed silent, gripping your hand a little tighter, hoping the feeling would pass.

You opened your eyes, and your gaze met his. The smile that spread across your face was one of pure love, your eyes softening as you looked at him. In that moment, all his insecurities melted away. You were his, and he was yours. It was as simple as that.

Kento leaned back in his chair, his own smile tugging at his lips as he continued to watch you. You shifted slightly, propping yourself up on one elbow, your expression playful as you caught him staring.

“See something you like?” you teased, your voice light and full of affection.

“Always, my love.” he replied, his voice deep and sincere. His gaze never left yours as he spoke, and you could see the intensity of his feelings reflected in his eyes. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

You chuckled, a soft, melodic sound that made his heart skip a beat. “You’re not so bad yourself, you know.”

Kento couldn’t help but grin at that, though his expression quickly turned serious again. “It drives me mad, you know,” he admitted, his voice low. “How beautiful you are. How you’re mine.”

The way he said it, with such raw emotion, made your heart flutter. There was something in his tone, something almost possessive, that sent a shiver down your spine. But it wasn’t a bad feeling. If anything, it made you feel even closer to him, knowing that he felt so deeply for you.

“And you’re mine.” you replied softly, reaching out to take his hand in yours. The simple touch seemed to calm him, his fingers threading through yours as he gave your hand a gentle squeeze. Your eyes narrowed on him. “Only mine.”

And then there was your possessiveness. You couldn’t deny it—you were just as bad as he was when it came to jealousy. You tried to play it cool, but the truth was, you were no better at hiding it than he was. The moment you noticed the women stealing glances at him, their eyes lingering on his broad shoulders, his chiseled features, you felt a wave of irritation wash over you.

It was subtle, but Kento could sense the tension in you, the way your posture stiffened, the way you shifted closer to him, almost instinctively, as if to stake your claim. You wanted the world to know that this man was yours and yours alone.

Just as it does now.

Because if you were being honest, your husband was the most beautiful man in the world. With his muscular build and tall six-foot frame, he was the epitome of masculine perfection. The way his long, muscular arms held that beer bottle in his massive palm, the casual strength in his grip, made your heart flutter. His chiseled jaw tightened as he glanced in the direction of the men who had dared to look your way, his bright brown eyes narrowing in a clear, unmistakable warning. He didn’t have to say a word—the message was loud and clear: stay away.

You bit your lip, trying to suppress the smile that threatened to break through. This man belonged to you, and he wanted everyone to be sure that they knew it. There was something undeniably satisfying about the way he made it so obvious, so deliberate. And you knew that he felt the same way about you.

His gaze flicked back to you, softening when he saw the look in your eyes. It was a look that said, “I’m yours.” and it made your heart swell with love and possessiveness all over again.

You didn’t care if it was irrational, if it was a little bit crazy—this man was yours, and you were his. And you wanted everyone to know that you belonged to each other, that nothing and no one could come between you.

Kento must have sensed your thoughts, because he leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear as he murmured, “You know you’re the only one I see, right?”

His voice was deep, reassuring, and it sent a shiver down your spine. “I know, babe." you whispered back, your fingers curling around his arm, feeling the solid muscle beneath his skin. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to make sure everyone else knows it too.”

A low chuckle rumbled in his chest as he pulled back just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes sparkling with amusement and something deeper, something more primal. “Good.” he said, his tone possessive and full of promise. “Because I’m not about to let anyone forget that you’re mine either.”

You grinned at that, the fiery possessiveness in his words matching your own. It was an unspoken agreement, a mutual understanding that neither of you would ever let anyone come between what you had. Because you both knew that what you had was rare, precious, and worth protecting at all costs.

As you stood there, close enough to feel the heat radiating off his body, you couldn’t help but marvel at how lucky you were. This beautiful, strong, and fiercely loyal man was yours. And you were his.

You pressed a kiss to his jaw, savoring the way he responded, the way his arm tightened around you just a little bit more. It was a simple gesture, but it carried the weight of everything you felt for him, everything you both felt for each other. This man belonged to you, and you belonged to him. And nothing in the world could change that.

It was a strange sort of dance, the two of you caught in a loop of possessiveness that neither could quite break free from. And yet, there was something oddly reassuring about it. In a world where you both faced so many uncertainties, where danger lurked around every corner, this shared jealousy was a reminder that you were both fiercely committed to each other. It wasn’t healthy, Kento knew that, but it was real. Even if you weren’t proud of it, even if Kento wasn’t proud of it — it was real. Between the two of you. It was love for you.

Still, the women’s gazes hadn’t wavered, you noticed. Their eyes still linger on your husband as if they had every right to admire him. The sight made your blood simmer, a protective, possessive streak flaring to life within you. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Kento—he was as loyal as they came—but you didn’t appreciate the way they were looking at him, as if he were something to be desired, something they could claim if they tried hard enough.

Your grip on his hand tightened as you leaned closer and you cast a glance in his direction. Kento, ever composed, was doing his best to ignore the attention, but you could see the slight tension in his jaw, the way his eyes flickered to you as if seeking reassurance. He puts away the beer bottle on the side and looks to you again.

A grin slowly spread across your lips as an idea formed. If those women wanted to look at your husband, you’d give them something to see—a clear, undeniable reminder that he was yours. You leaned in, your hand resting on his chest as you tilted your head up to meet his gaze.

Kento looked down at you, a question in his eyes, but before he could ask, you closed the distance between you, pressing your lips to his in a hot, passionate kiss. The world around you faded as you poured all your love, your possessiveness, your desire into that kiss. It wasn’t just a kiss—it was a statement. A declaration that this man, this incredible, strong, loyal man, was yours. And no one else had any right to him. He only belongs to you. Only you.

Kento’s initial surprise melted away as he responded in kind, his hand moving to cradle the back of your head, pulling you even closer. His lips moved against yours with a fervor that matched your own, and you could feel the heat radiating from him, the way his body relaxed into yours as if nothing else mattered. Kento’s arms slowly wrap around the small of your back, kissing you even deeper.

When you finally pulled back, you were breathless, your heart pounding in your chest. You could see the effect it had on him, the way his eyes had darkened with desire, the small, satisfied smile that tugged at his lips. You glanced over at the women who had been ogling him earlier. Their expressions had shifted—some were embarrassed, others annoyed, but all of them had gotten the message loud and clear.

Triumph surged through you as you turned back to Kento, your grin widening. “I think they got the point, babe.” you whispered, your voice teasing.

Kento chuckled softly, his thumb brushing over your lips as if to savor the moment. “I believe they did.” he murmured, his tone filled with warmth and a hint of amusement. “Though I must admit, I didn’t mind that at all.”

“Then…..can we continue this upstairs?”

Your husband’s eyes narrow, almost awakening something in him. “What do you have in mind?”

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YOU DON’T THINK YOU WOULD EVER GET TIRED OF HIM. Nanami Kento always made you feel so many things—desire, love, passion—and you loved every bit of it. The tension between you had been building ever since that heated kiss on the beach, and as you made your way back to your hotel room, it only grew stronger.

Each step, each shared glance, every subtle touch added fuel to the fire burning between you. The anticipation was electric, and by the time you reached the door, it was like a dam waiting to burst.

The moment the door clicked shut behind you, the restraint you’d both been holding onto snapped. You pressed yourself against him, your lips crashing into his with a fervor that had your head spinning. It was as if you couldn’t get enough of him, couldn’t close the gap between you fast enough. His hands roamed your body with a hunger that matched your own, pulling you closer until there wasn’t an inch of space left between you.

The kiss deepened, growing more urgent, more desperate, as you both succumbed to the need that had been simmering beneath the surface all day. His fingers dug into your hips, guiding you back toward the bed as he claimed your mouth over and over again, each kiss more intense than the last.

You could feel his desire, the way his muscles tensed beneath your touch, the low growl that rumbled in his chest as you tugged at his shirt, pulling it over his head. The moment the fabric hit the floor, his lips were back on yours, his hands working to free you from your bikini. The way he touched you, with a mix of reverence and raw need, sent shivers down your spine. He breaks the kiss.

“Kento, Kento….” you breathed finally, your voice trembling with anticipation as you felt his lips trail down your neck, leaving a path of fire in their wake. His hands moved with purpose, untying the strings of your bikini, and the sensation of the cool air against your bare skin only heightened the intensity of the moment.

He leaned back for just a moment, his gaze sweeping over you with a look of pure, unfiltered desire. “You’re perfect, my love.” he murmured, his voice rough with emotion, before his lips were back on yours, more insistent this time, as if he couldn’t bear to be apart from you for even a second.

Your hands found their way to the waistband of his beach shorts, your fingers trembling slightly as you pushed them down, the fabric pooling at his feet. You could feel the heat of his body against yours, the way his hard, muscular frame pressed against you, and it sent a rush of heat straight to your core.

The bed hit the back of your knees, and before you knew it, you were tumbling onto the soft sheets, Kento following you down, his body covering yours in an instant. The weight of him, the feel of his skin against yours, was intoxicating. He presses his lips against yours again, the heat between your bodies burning you even more.

You moaned into his mouth, the sound muffled as he deepened the kiss, his hands exploring every inch of your body as if he was trying to memorize you all over again. You could feel his arousal pressing against you, the heat of him throbbing against your thigh, and it sent a jolt of electricity through your body.

His lips left yours, trailing down your neck once again and across your collarbone, leaving a trail of fire wherever they touched. The feeling of his mouth on your skin, combined with the way his hands gripped your hips, pulling you closer, was almost too much to bear.

“Kento, babe.” you gasped, your voice breaking as he found that sensitive spot just below your ear, his teeth grazing the skin there in a way that made you arch against him, desperate for more. “It’s so….it’s so hot.”

“Tell me what you want, my love.” he murmured against your skin, his voice low and filled with need.

“You.” you breathed, your fingers threading through his hair as you pulled him closer, needing to feel every part of him against you. “I want you, Kento.”

The way he responded, with a deep, guttural groan, sent shivers down your spine. His hands moved to your thighs, spreading them apart as he settled between them. It was as though he found home again. You groaned as you felt his hands explore the exposed skin. He was enjoying this, you knew. He enjoyed teasing you.

“God, Kento.” you breathed out, your voice trembling with need. He was driving you wild, his touch lighting you up in ways you hadn’t thought possible. You needed more, needed him closer, needed to feel him in every possible way..

You could feel him pressing against you, his lips returning to yours in a kiss that was just as intense as before. It was almost too much, the way his body fit so perfectly against yours, the way his hands moved with such skill and tenderness, the way every inch of him seemed to be in tune with your needs.

The anticipation was building, the need for him becoming overwhelming as you felt his fingers deftly undo the last of your bikini top. The cool air of the room brushed against your exposed skin, but it was nothing compared to the heat radiating between the two of you. You could feel the wetness pooling between your thighs, the desperate longing for him growing with each passing second.

Kento’s touch was everything—gentle and firm, demanding and patient all at once. The way he handled you, the way he made you feel, it was almost too much to bear, and yet you couldn’t get enough. You wanted more, needed more, and he seemed more than willing to give it to you. He liked to give you more and more, to satiate your greed.

Your bodies moved together with a rhythm that felt both familiar and electrifyingly new. The room was filled with the sounds of your heavy breathing, the soft rustle of sheets, and the occasional, intoxicating moans that slipped from your lips as Kento's hands roamed over your bare skin.

His touch was a maddening mix of tenderness and raw desire, each caress lighting a fire inside you that grew with every passing moment. His fingers traced the curve of your hips, the dip of your waist, and the softness of thighs, lingering just long enough to make you gasp before moving on. You could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin as his lips followed the path of his hands, kissing and nipping at every sensitive spot he could find.

You arched your back as his mouth moved lower, his lips grazing the sensitive skin of your collarbone before trailing down to your chest. He took his time, savoring every inch of you as if he wanted to memorize the way you tasted, the way you felt beneath him. His tongue flicked over your nipple, sending a shockwave of pleasure through you that made your toes curl. You moaned his name, your fingers tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer, urging him on.

Kento responded with a low growl, the sound vibrating against your skin as he took your nipple into his mouth, sucking gently before letting his teeth graze the sensitive flesh. The sensation was almost too much to bear, your body reacting with a surge of heat that pooled between your thighs. You could feel the wetness there, the way your body was aching for him, and you knew that he could feel it too.

His hands slid down your sides, his fingers tracing the curve of your hips before dipping between your thighs. The first touch of his fingers against your slick heat made you cry out, your hips bucking involuntarily as you pressed yourself against his hand. He moved with agonizing slowness, teasing you with light, feathery touches that only made your desire grow stronger.

You could feel the tension building inside you, the need for release becoming almost unbearable as he continued to tease you. His fingers slipped between your folds, stroking you with a skill that had your head spinning. Each touch sent a jolt of pleasure through you, your body trembling with anticipation as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. One after another, it was a pandemonium of pleasure. When you came, you sobbed as you felt his fingers tighten against your crevices.

“Kento, babe. Please.” you gasped, your voice trembling with need. “Please, I need you.”

He lifted his head, his eyes dark with desire as he looked down at you. There was something primal in his gaze, something that made your heart skip a beat. He wanted you just as badly as you wanted him, and that knowledge sent a thrill of excitement through you.He removed his fingers, licking them clean one after another, enjoying the taste of you. The sight of him made you even more wet.

“What do you want, my love?” He cooed at you. “Where do you want me?”

“Inside, Kento.” You muttered, your eyes beaming with pleasure. “Please, babe. Please.”

He didn’t make you wait any longer, his dear love. With a practiced ease, he positioned himself between your thighs, his hands gripping your hips as he guided himself to your entrance. The tip of his cock brushed against your swollen folds, and you could feel the heat of him, the way his length stretched you as he slowly pushed inside.

The sensation was overwhelming, the feeling of him filling you completely making you gasp for air. Your hands clutched at his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin as you tried to anchor yourself in the whirlwind of pleasure that threatened to consume you.

Kento moved with deliberate, measured thrusts, each one sending a wave of ecstasy through your body that made your vision blur. He was gentle but firm, his pace steady as he worked to bring you both to the peak of pleasure. You could feel every inch of him inside you, the way he stretched you, filled you, in a way that made you feel utterly complete.

Your moans filled the room, each one growing louder as he picked up the pace, his hips snapping against yours with a growing urgency. The bed creaked beneath you, the sound almost drowned out by the symphony of your lovemaking. You could feel the tension coiling in your belly, the familiar pressure building as he drove you closer and closer to the edge.

“Kento, I’m… I’m so close, babeeeeee!” you breathed out, your voice trembling with anticipation. You were right on the edge, teetering on the brink of a powerful release that you could feel building inside you like a storm.

“Let go, love.” he whispered against your ear, his voice rough with desire. “I’ve got you. Let go for me.”

His words were all you needed. With a final, powerful thrust, he pushed you over the edge, your body shattering into a million pieces as your orgasm ripped through you. You cried out his name, your voice breaking as waves of pleasure crashed over you, each one more intense than the last.

Kento followed you into bliss, his hips stuttering as he buried himself deep inside you, his own release overtaking him. You could feel the warmth of him spilling into you, the way his body trembled against yours as he groaned your name, his voice thick with emotion.

For a moment, the world stood still. All you could feel was him, all you could hear was the sound of your racing hearts and the ragged breaths you both struggled to catch. He stayed inside you, his body pressed against yours as you both came down from the high, the aftershocks of pleasure still rippling through you.

Slowly, he pulled out, leaving you with a feeling of emptiness that was quickly replaced by the warmth of his arms wrapping around you. He pulled you close, holding you against his chest as he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead.

“I love you, love.” he whispered, his voice soft and full of sincerity. “So much.”

“I love you too, babe.” you murmured back, your voice barely above a whisper. Your body was spent, completely exhausted from the intensity of your lovemaking, but you felt content, safe, and utterly cherished in his arms.

As you lay there together, his arms tighten around you as if he never wanted to let you go. And in that moment, with the warmth of his body against yours and the sound of the waves crashing outside, you knew that you were exactly where you were meant to be—right here, in his arms, for as long as you both lived.

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epilogue

Later that evening, after the intensity of your earlier moments had faded into a comfortable, blissful haze, you found yourself curled up against Kento’s chest, his arm wrapped securely around you. You sighed, almost as though you were the most content in your entire life.

He’d already made sure to take care of you and clean you up, even making you some tea so that you could relax on your shared bed. And you love him for it. He always spoils you to no end. The sound of the waves outside your window was a soothing backdrop, lulling you into a state of utter contentment.

As you lay there, a thought popped into your mind, one that made you grin mischievously. You tilted your head up to look at him, your fingers lightly tracing patterns on his chest.

“Kento, babe.” you began, your tone teasing, “I’ve been thinking.”

“Hm?” He glanced down at you, his expression warm and relaxed, though there was a hint of curiosity in his eyes. “What’s on your mind?”

You bit your lip to keep from grinning as you prepared to drop your bombshell. “You know how I’m always worried about you being a sorcerer and putting yourself in danger?”

He nodded, clearly not seeing where you were going with this. “Yes, you’ve mentioned that a few times.”

“Well, babe.” you continued, struggling to keep a straight face. “I’ve come up with the perfect solution to that problem.”

“And what’s that?” Kento asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I think you should quit being a sorcerer and become my house–husband instead.” you announced with a grin.

There was a moment of silence as Kento processed what you’d just said. His usually stoic expression shifted, his eyes narrowing slightly as he tried to determine whether or not you were serious. You could see the wheels turning in his head, and it only made it harder for you to hold back your laughter. He looked cute, when he's thinking, you like to believe.

“A… house–husband?” he repeated slowly, as if testing the word out on his tongue.

“Yes! A house–husband, babe.” you confirmed, nodding enthusiastically. “You’d be amazing at it! You could cook, clean, and take care of everything at home while I go to work. And you’d never have to worry about exorcisms or curses or any of that dangerous stuff ever again.”

Kento blinked at you, his mouth opening as if to say something, then closing again as he reconsidered. Finally, a small, amused smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “And what would I do all day at your house–husband?”

“Oh, I’m sure you’d find plenty to do, babe.” you replied, barely able to keep a straight face. “You could perfect your cooking skills, learn how to fold the perfect fitted sheet, maybe even take up knitting! Plus, you’d have plenty of time to dote on me when I come home from work. Maybe even meet the old ladies at the corner store! They really like zumba, just as much as you do.”

At that, Kento let out a low chuckle, the sound vibrating through his chest. “Knitting, huh? I didn’t realize that was part of the job description.”

“Well, it’s optional.” you conceded with a giggle. “But I think you’d be really good at it.”

Kento shook his head, clearly amused by your antics. “You’re serious about this, aren’t you?”

“Dead serious.” you replied, though the twinkle in your eyes betrayed your true intentions. “I mean, think about it. No more dangerous missions, no more fighting curses. Just a quiet, peaceful life at home with me. Grow old together and me spoiling my husband with bringing in the dough and you spoiling me with all your love. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

He considered it for a moment, his expression thoughtful. “It does sound nice.” he admitted, his tone still teasing. “But I’m not sure how I’d feel about giving up my job to become a… house–husband.”

“Oh, come on.” you coaxed, poking him playfully in the ribs. “You’d love it. And I’d love coming home to you every day. Plus, you’d look really cute in an apron.”

That finally did it. Your husband Kento burst out laughing, the sound rich and warm as it filled the room. You couldn’t help but join in, your own laughter mingling with his as you both imagined the ridiculousness of the idea. But you suppose the ridiculousness of it is what made it so touching. Life is always strange anyway, you think. And he knows that too.

When the laughter finally subsided, Kento leaned down to press a soft kiss to your forehead. “I appreciate the thought.” he said, his voice full of affection. “But for now, I think I’ll stick to being a sorcerer for now. Though I have to admit, the idea of being your house–husband is tempting.”

“Tempting enough to reconsider?” you asked with a grin, though you knew his answer.

“Not quite, love.” he replied, chuckling. “But I’ll keep it in mind as a backup plan.”

“Deal.” you agreed, snuggling closer to him. “But just so you know, I’m not giving up on the idea entirely. You’d make an excellent house–husband. Mine only, of course.”

Kento smiled down at you, his eyes soft and filled with love. “And you’d make an excellent lawyer who brings home the bacon.”

“Then it’s settled.” you said, laughing. “We’ll just have to make sure you stay safe so I don’t have to resort to plan B.”

“With you by my side, love? I have no doubt I will.” he murmured, kissing you softly as you both settled back into the peaceful, contented silence of the evening.

443 notes · View notes

rinhaler · 1 year ago

Note

I’m begging and scratching at the walls for more plug!sukuna omg. I’ve been thinking about him at a party really clinging to a shy girl, trying to get her to “just take one hit you’ll like it” and something something he convinces her to sit on his lap and he lets her explore his body, slowly getting really worked up. Letting her have “control” until he loses it.

Once again this weeks dub has me by the NECK Ray chase ate and left no crumbs UNFFF I hope you like this! Scummy Sukuna my beloved 💖

warnings: 18+ MDNI, fem!reader, dubcon, creampie, manipulation, vaginal sex, choking, degradation, smoking oui'd, coercion, slight oral fixation.

words: 2k

“Alone?” a voice asks, sitting beside you on the couch. You shuffle as much as you can to give him space, keeping your knees together as he decides to manspread and rest his arm around the back.

“No I’m with my—” you turn to look at Nobara before realising she’s attached her lips to someone else’s while you were disassociating. “Oh, well, kind of.” you shrug.

He smirks, leaning forward. “Good,” he tells you as he pulls some things out of his pocket and places them on the coffee table. It’s like a science, watching people roll blunts. You’ve never tried it and you’ve never wanted to, not when you’ve heard so many horror stories. But whenever you’ve been around to see someone roll, you’ve always been oddly captivated. “You look lost.”

“U-Um…” you huff, unsure of how to respond. “I don’t really like parties…” you sigh.

He nods, not saying anything else as he continues to finish rolling his joint. It’s quick and easy, like he does this all day everyday and has it perfected. You watch him light it, but look down at your lap when he leans back against the couch.

“Why not?” he wonders. “Too loud? Too many people?”

“Yeah…” you confess, feeling a little lame as you admit your true feelings.

You’re in the prime of your life and you’re complaining about being at a party. You wouldn’t mind as much if Nobara wasn’t occupied. But you don’t know anyone else here. Truthfully, you probably would have snuck home if he didn’t sit down to talk to you. You’d much rather be at home with some takeout food and a bingeable show.

Your heart sinks a little when he stands up. Have you really embarrassed yourself that much? So much so that you’ve bored him enough to leave. He walks away, turning to face you after taking a good amount of steps.

“Are you coming? Thought you didn’t like parties.” he speaks. He waits until you stand up, but carries on walking before you can catch up to him. You follow him through the house and up the stairs. It’s a lot quieter, though there are still muffles. Soft moans from one room and crying from another. “Sukuna. If you were wondering.” he introduces himself, not bothering to look at you as he does.

You tell him your name, and realise he’s brought you to a bedroom.

“Get comfy.” he instructs, he turns on a light, dimming it slowly when he sees your eyes screw shut from the brightness. The music still plays softly through the gaps of the door and into the room from the rest of the house. “Why’d you come here if you don’t like parties?”

“My friend… she wanted me to.”

“So you just do what people tell you to?” he asks, sitting beside you on the bed.

Your face fills with heat and your heart begins to race. You wiggle away from him slightly to keep some distance between you. He takes a drag of his blunt, looking up at the lights as he puffs a plume of smoke towards the ceiling.

“Not always.”

He doesn’t respond, instead, he holds the blunt out for you to try. You shake your head, though, declining immediately. Even with a few drinks in your system, you know better.

“Awe, no fun.” he chuckles, taking another drag. “C’mon. One hit, sweetheart.” he tells you, getting closer to you again and putting his arm around you. Your head drops, eyes finding where his hand rests on your hip before looking at the joint he’s holding right in front of you.

“I— I’ve never… I’ve never smoked before.” you admit.

“That’s cute. One puff won’t hurt, yeah?” he speaks, though you’re unsure if he’s trying to convince you or if he’s actually certain it won’t hurt. He smiles widely, it’s toothy and somewhat intimidating. He’s happy. He can see that you’re considering it. “Promise you’ll like it.”

You gulp, heartily, before wrapping your lips around the end of it. You’ve smoked cigarettes before, and you could only assume it would be similar.

Wrong.

You cough, sputter, gag from the invasion. He laughs at your expense, though he smooths a large palm up and down your back to soothe you. Your throat feels charred. It’s like the smoke has burnt holes throughout your oesophagus and the edges are scalding.

He gets up and walks towards a mini fridge you hadn’t noticed, tossing a bottle of water in your direction. And you drink it, quickly, the bottle crackling as you squeeze and drain it of every drop you can steal.

“S-Sorry,” you apologise, still coughing slightly. “That was embarrassing.”

“Yeah.” he agrees. “You really weren’t lying about it being your first time, hah?” he keeps going. Unfortunately for you, you don’t realise that he’s goading you. And it’s working.

You ask for another hit, out of principle. And of course, he smiles and hands it to you.

It gets easier, for sure. Soon enough, you’ve smoked the whole thing. He applauds you, impressed. But why does it make your ego swell? Your confidence soars, you don’t feel so shy anymore.

Not around him.

“C’mere,” he instructs, patting his thighs as an invitation. You look between his ruby red eyes and thick thighs as you decide whether you want to or not. You hesitate, a few times, before eventually standing up. He guides you down by your hips, your thighs straddling his while his hands dip beneath your skirt and thumbs stroke your skin soothingly.

Your eyes feel heavy, and he can’t help but smile when he sees how bloodshot they are. He can see how your eyes want to widen in shock. So utterly confused about how you got here.

He doesn’t give you a chance to think, though, not when his large hand cradles the crown of your head and pulls you towards himself. Your lips are caught together. It’s tame, to him. But to you it’s scandalous. A random hook up isn’t something you’ve ever done. You’re a long term relationship kind of girl.

But you can’t help yourself, now. His personality is magnetic, and his charm is captivating. You don’t want to disappoint him, for some reason. The thought of letting him down scares you. The idea of disobeying him makes your heart race.

That could just be the drugs, though.

You pull back, tracing your fingers over his body. A breathy gasp leaves you as he pulls off his vest, tossing it aside to reveal his chiselled body. Your cunt throbs as you feel how ripped he is. He’s the biggest man you’ve ever been with, like this, and he knows it too. He can tell by the look on your face.

The way you unashamedly squeeze his biceps. Two of your little hands aren’t even enough to wrap around the entire muscle.

He watches you, calmly, admiring how cute you look as you inspect every inch of his body.

“Having fun?” he asks, you give nothing but a dumb nod in response. His skin is smooth and you find yourself tracing a single finger over all of his tattoos. He guides you by your chin to look at him again, leaning forward to kiss you.

You reciprocate, allowing him to kiss you his way. He slips his tongue between the seam of your lips and two rough hands reach under your skirt and grab the fat of your ass. You wrap your legs around his back as he lifts you up, helping you back down so that your back is flat against the mattress.

He ruts his body against yours. And you can feel just how hard he is beneath his sweats. It’s huge, it feels huge. But you can barely focus as each dry humping of his hips stimulates your core.

“Fuck, need to fuck you,” he whispers against your ear and nibbling on the lobe. Your eyes roll back as he chokes you softly, and your own hips begin to buck as you search for more pleasure.

You’ve never felt so aroused before.

It’s like all of the blood is rushing to your core and pleading with you to stimulate yourself further. You need more. More. You wonder if anything will ever be enough, though.

“S’fucking cute, wan’ my cock bad, hah? Am I right?”

“F-Fuck me, please.” you whimper, screwing your eyes shut so that he can’t see how embarrassed you are.

He loosens his grip on your neck, moving it to cup your cheek instead. You instinctively open your mouth for him, and he lets out a soft laugh before pushing his thumb between your lips. He pulls down his sweatpants just enough to free his cock, eyes not leaving you for a second as you swirl your tongue around his thumb, bobbing and sucking all the while.

“I fucking knew it,” he speaks, “Always the quiet ones, always the dirtiest.”

You giggle a little, still suckling on his thumb like it was your sole purpose on this earth. He flips up your skirt to reveal a cute little g-string beneath.

“You don’t like parties? S’that why you came here dressed like a little whore?” he asks, pushing the material into the crease of your thigh. He lines his cock up with your entrance, slowly pushing in. “Sorry I didn’t prep ya, but you’re drenched anyway. Besides, a slut like you prob’ly doesn’t mind getting fucked like this.” he continues. He forces himself into you, ignoring the resistance until he’s snuggled inside.

He is huge.

The way your pussy splits open just to take the sheer girth of him makes you wonder if he’s even human. His cockhead nudges at your cervix, and every thrust he delivers hammers against it ruthlessly.

“H-Hurh…” you try to tell him that you’re hurting, but his thumb presses down on your thumb and it makes you gag. Though he slows down, knowing you were warning him. He isn’t a complete monster, after all. He’s a bit of a dick, sure, but he wants you to enjoy this, too.

His thrusts aren’t as deep anymore, sparing your poor cervix for the time being. The pain subsides and turns into something a lot more pleasant. So much so, that you can’t stop yourself from raking your nails across his back as he hits just the right spot inside of you with his enormous cock.

He pulls his thumb from your mouth, opting to squeeze the sides of your neck again instead. Your moans become lodged in your throat, and you can’t voice just how fucking perfect he feels inside of you. You’re close, so fucking close.

Though surprisingly, he cums first, loudly. Unable to withstand the blinding pleasure he feels as your tiny little cunt tightens around him. His body breaks out in a cold sweat as he moans, fucking his cum deeper and deeper into you. His restraint is lost, and he’s soon nudging against your cervix again, forcing every drop he can deep into your womb.

The warm feeling has your eyes crossing as you begin to spasm around him. He hisses, desperately, too overstimulated to keep quiet as your walls begin to hug his cock.

“You can stay the night, if you want.” Sukuna tells you, pulling himself out of your spent hole. He wipes his dick off on your inner thigh, though you barely register it as you think about what he said.

“Is this… Is this your house? Your party?”

“Little brother’s party. I live here, too.”

He doesn’t want you to get the wrong idea. You’re certainly a sweet girl, and you seem like the type to get attached. He has an ulterior motive in mind, though. Sure, maybe he’ll fuck you a few more times throughout the night. But he hopes you won’t be a fool and fall for him.

He has a goal for the following morning.

He wants to know how Yuuji’s girlfriend will react to seeing a girl leave his bedroom.

2K notes · View notes

haitanology · 8 months ago

Text

all is said and done before doomsday comes ; s62 x fem!reader

—it’s no secret that tenjiku brings misfortune to all those whose red fabric bleeds onto their skin. before the dooming tragedy crashes upon all of your closest friends, you indulge yourselves in a night where all limits break, tasting what once was forbidden to them.

warning — smut (mdni) ! gangbang, sub!reader, rough sex, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (f & m receiving), orgasm denial, double penetration, anal, dacryphilia, squirting, lots of cum/spit/tears, creampie, praising, body worship, overstimulation, size kink, reader’s eyes are covered at one point, 69, mating press (?), some of them are filthy little freaks and others nasty little shits, kakucho not invited bc he was 14 at the time, got a master’s in dickology i guess bc never have i ever described so many with such detail, there’s probably more i missed idk

wc ~ 9.6k

note, this. this is what i bring to the function. the inability to write porn without plot, always shoving in feelings everywhere.

part i. my heart for thought.

the day before the fight between tenjiku and toman, all men close to you meet up for dinner at your apartment. a tradition dear to you ever since they were boys, with so much anger on their cupped hands spilled in the violence that filled their every desire. yet, not a single drop ever splashed onto you, their touch soft albeit drenched in murderous blood.

paths crossed after stumbling upon their formation, running away from a crowd of high school boys —at the time way older and bigger— you were the reason for their first conquest as tenjiku. a bond forged with the vivid red of your hearts’, the black of the darkness that surrounds them and the white of the ray of hope you offer.

ever since then you’ve been friends, the closest ones could ever be. your heartbeats merged; a yearning for your warmth naive. presence leaving traces of heat on their cheeks, some dark red much like their uniforms.

however, time passes, and before you now stand men. knuckles bruised and innocence gone, viciousness part of their hearts along with the thirst for a bigger power. and even then, a big chunk of their hearts and souls has never left your hands, having them crave more strongly —never understanding what they even wanted.

also having grown with them, with each year your fear has only grounded itself further. roots wrapping around your feet and having you stay put as the world they have constructed opened itself to you. screams laced in agony and tears reflecting sadness, you were aware one day those sadistic grins would perish. the thought eats you alive night and day, in your nightmares and dreams.

it wasn’t the loneliness that scared you, but the idea of losing the blood that pumps your heart. romantically, there’s nothing (or so you say); despite that, the strings that connected you to them are thicker —tough to break and more tense than they have ever been.

so tense they could come undone and tie themselves back up to a bond that’s even mightier. but nothing can make them crumble, you are sure of it.

“i don’t want you guys to fight tomorrow.” you leave your words to hang in the air, washed in the scent of loitering takeout boxes, steam circling around them.

outside, the vast darkness is splattered by dots of light. not following a pattern, entangled in their dance, two stars farther than the rest. in the wide crystals that separate your group from the cold winter night, calmness is reflected.

you barely whisper, but their attention is always on you, so to them it was as loud as a scream. a plead for tranquility to finally settle, heart stripped to vulnerability.

“why the hell not?” shion retorts, although his tone isn’t mad nor pissed off. eyes on you, like they’ve always been, feasting on your pouting lips.

he keeps the head shake to himself, chopsticks navigating through his food to keep his mind occupied. nevertheless, the plopping sounds coming from the boxed noodles have him swallowing down an invisible lump in his throat.

“have a bad feeling, dunno.” shrugging, you mumble, dulcet to combat shion’s unconscious roughness. a gesture he silently thanks, chest constricted inside of him.

not having touched the food tonight, your hands rest in heavy fists on top of your thighs. your stomach mocks you, feasting on the concern that drops upon it, twisting in giddiness that makes itself painful to you. the living room’s icy kisses bring you shivers, its presence heavy.

when the younger haitani scoffs, forcing you out of the mortal trap that are your thoughts, you notice the piercing ache in your head from your harsh wrinkles in between furrowed brows. you don’t want them to misinterpret your worrying for anger —not that they would— the curve they form now more upset.

“nothing will happen.” rindou waves your fear off with a lazy hand from his place in one of the couches. the smile he gifts you gives a tender hug, so joyful and relaxed. “as long as you’re alive, none of us could ever think of leaving you.”

they don’t need to say it out loud; they all agree.

on the other hand, you offer rindou a smile of your own. it’s nervous, trembling while it holds itself up, but ravishing in his eyes. swimming in a vivid purple, his pupils grow bigger, lights reflecting a desire for your wellbeing —a desire for you.

his words can do wonders, and while it may be just for a short time, you can proclaim there’s been an instant tonight where you’ve felt everything would be alright. the world sure wasn’t ending tomorrow, not when that same world declares it won’t. no matter what, all because of you.

yet it’s all in your eyes, wide and averting. the terror has taken over you like a parasite, taking more than sweet words to get rid of.

“yeah, we’re plenty strong!” mochi exclaims, his grin triumphant. arm lifted, he flexes it with pride to which shion rolls his eyes, but the short snort you utter makes it worth it. “what, you don’t trust us?”

your eyes broaden even more when you hear his dejected question, his smirk fallen into a disappointed frown. you shake your head, rapidly so. trusting their strength; with your heart in their hands, you don’t want it to suffer.

throughout the years, the bond that connects you to them has proven to be ever growing. your mind, body and soul as much of a part of them as your own. same for them, who have given all of those to you when all you knew were their names. if it were to be severed, something within you would die, and if it happened to morph into a more passionate craving —one none of you answer to nor understand— you’d fear for the unknown future, and the growth within your heart.

“it’s not that, i’m ju— just—“ you don’t mean to stumble upon your words, the same way you don’t want them to think you can’t leave fate on their calloused hands. taking a deep breath, you gulp. “just—“

but your words are deep in your chest, unable to get out. your gaze glistens, honing onto your fidgeting hands, blinking any trace of the soon to come tears. the bad omen only makes its presence more evident to you, poking its ugly tongue, invisible to anyone else in the living room. it’s real, vivid, and it makes you—

“scared?” it’s mucho who completes your train of thought in your stead, always listening to your heart, inviting him to the confines of your mind.

he’s never needed many words, his gaze hungry for the knowledge of you. and when you nod, answering his query, his expression relaxes. although only when your terror has truly subsided, will he rest peacefully.

“i’m terrified.” you confess, the moon at its highest peak in the darkest sea. voice thin, breakable with a simple touch.

they loathe it, your distress. a stab to their hearts even when someone else’s fright pumps it back to life. to them, that was love, caging your fragile heart in their arms so that their backs take all the damage.

a hushed promise is shared between all of them, one to save you from that dismay, no matter what it takes or how it’s done. it’s sealed, and so is the night’s fate.

there’s shuffling, muted steps silent against the floor below. in front of you stand a pair of black socks, looking up to come across the diminished violet hues of izana. a deep color honed in violence, shining with anger that once glimmered with joy. ruined by the big heart of who he thought was his brother, so eager to bring up mikey to the life they shared —their secrets, their bond, broken by the youngest’s toothy grin.

alas, you haven’t been tainted by his ill-fated hands yet, secured by his own presence. his hand, small but grounding, delicate despite how many punches it has thrown at the world around him. all blood is cleaned, resting on your thigh, caressing your skin.

an electrifying touch, much like the others’, having you sweat. heat on your face, heart hungry, but you’ve never given it much thought. you’ve always loved them, willing for the emptiness of your body to fill itself with yearning so as to not sacrifice what was carefully built.

izana speaks in gentle promises and strong declarations. he doesn’t sugarcoat what’s intense, allowing it to crush whoever hears him, wanting his love to be known. you know they do love you, but the blind eye you all turn to when it comes to the dissatisfaction of your desires will always yell louder.

“we love you, so much.” more than you could know, the silence completes, unheard.

you find the hidden words with ease, nothing will happen to us, he says, and what izana says, goes. but they are blind to the scythe in the middle of the room, itching to spin around and take its next victim. and you know, between you and those whose red jackets bleed, the result will always be one of them.

“enough to drop the fight?” you counter, your decisive frown challenging them. deepening once izana gives a slow shake of his head.

“enough to refuse to die.”

his response isn’t as reassuring as you would have liked, no matter how deep his words puncture. he gives your flesh a firm squeeze, eyes widening at the tight grip on your thigh.

clearing his throat, he turns back to his place on the couch. a small smirk, concealed as triumph when all it really shows is satisfaction. actions given out to make you forget the disappointment due to his answer.

you sit there, missing the warmth of his presence; the contact on your skin. cravings come back up, like bile stuck to your throat. you need to keep it away, as you have always done.

gulping, you focus on the clock’s ticking. small conversations are carried out between them: shion’s obnoxious laughter and rindou’s childish chuckles, the serenity of mucho’s presence, mochi’s boyish pride, the veiled kindness izana attempts to hide or ran’s attentive listening that you know makes him caring —even though he sometimes uses all he knows to poke fun at them.

you love tenjiku, even kakucho, who couldn’t be there tonight. his spot is empty, unoccupied, chopsticks untouched on top of the table. you don’t care, keeping him close to your heart as well.

“i’ll protect them, always.” mumbling, ran’s lips curve up into a smile full of fondness. adoration sparkling the hyacinth tint of his pupils, capturing the memories of the people he treasures for himself.

your own smile engraved on his mind forever, one he makes sure will always stay that way. along the light in your eyes, never dimming despite their company. you make them forget what they are, and what friends would they be if they don’t return the favor?

dinner ends when the moon is at the brightest peak of her journey. between indistinctive chatter you all clean up, the suffocating smell of food consumed by the strong winds from the ajar window.

goodbyes happen as they have done ever since the beginning. strong hugs that last longer than usual this time, pressing you closer to them, some hiding the goosebumps caused by your nose against the side of their necks. others decant for kisses on your cheek, lips so different but exuding the same elation —the exact same passion that burns you from the inside out.

the door opens; you wish for this night to keep going. a reckless dream that should have been more precise.

“i love you guys.” through wobbly words, you manage to say in a flimsy voice. stare avoiding theirs, and lips pressed together tightly. “thank you, for being in my life.”

you blink, trying to dry off your watery eyes. back of your hand wiping them, getting rid of any trace of tears. your heartbeat quickens its pace, moving its way up to your throat, unable to add anything else.

but you turn to them, fear aside, wanting to take one more look before the inevitable happens. and when you do, you come across their gaping mouths and reddish blushes, their hearts going so crazy they are just as speechless. something was different, less friendly; more intricate.

it’s shion who breaks the silence, knowing that if any of them were to touch you now, what would happen could break what was so carefully tied together. they hated to fight against what they wanted, but they could never win if it meant for everything to crumble to pieces.

the world was so unfair, depriving all of you of the purest of loves, and the night to seal it off.

“you’re gonna make me blush, cutie.” shion smirks, more a grimace than anything else, turning around to walk towards the elevator. with an aching heart and disappointment, the others follow his lead too.

“yeah, he’s gonna have to go home quickly to beat his meat in peace.” mochi snorts, their backs to you, leaving you to listen to their forced chuckles.

“oh shut the fuck up! you don’t want me to start talking.” threat dangerous enough to have mochi’s mouth shut, you dread for the moment the elevator arrives. maybe it’s for the best, as all fun has now turned sour, frustrations hard to hide in each and every expression.

you loathe this departure, the bad feeling hugging you so close you choke on your misfortune and the emptiness in your body and soul. no choice but to sit back on your couch, loveless and alone, dreading for horrible news you are sure will end up coming true.

the elevator dings, doors opening wide. before they close, all of them spare you one last look, blended in sadness and failure, for your fear persists in your shaking figure and your pleading eyes. maybe they should have kissed you so hard, you have nothing on your mind but that. filling your thoughts with each of them, helping you sleep, doing whatever it takes. but they can’t do any of that.

after all, you’re just their bestest friend. a step they’re satisfied standing in, or they convince themselves they are, at least. but has there ever been someone to stay in the middle of some stairs, waiting forever for something to happen, not making their way up themselves?

the elevator closes; so does your door. the spare key still in its place inside the potted plant by the entrance.

part ii. my body for dinner.

your bedroom welcomes you with a cold hearted hug, having you wrap your arms around yourself. the huge windows make way for the night painted in streaks of melancholy, the city below so lively; you so dejected.

giving your bed a single glance, you can already tell sleep won’t be coming tonight nor tomorrow. your love is laughable to you, shy and unwilling to make itself braver, sticking to comfort.

what’s so comforting about the loneliness you are doomed to drown in? where no helping hands remain alive to pick you up, having no choice but to join the men you love in death?

tonight will be full of these thoughts, you know that, yet they still hurt. each a stab to your body, a mockery at your soul. every ounce of positivity you try to get out of your system mere carnage to them. it had to be today, you should have crossed that line that unconsciously formed.

allowed them to come closer to you. much like shion’s calloused hands and their cold touch creeping up from behind you, covering your eyes and whispering close to your ear.

“boo!” you shriek, shoulders tense as you jump up in place. however shion’s hold is tough to get rid of, pulling you closer to him without coming across his chest. he wouldn’t have bitten back the moan that was sure to happen.

he laughs, everybody joining right after. you take a deep breath, huffing through their laughter with a hand to your chest. though you don’t want to admit, your heart’s elated at their appearance —at the fact they have come back for you.

“shion, what the hell’s your problem?” it comes out louder than intended, shrill and angry. to them, it’s obvious you don’t mean it. your brows furrow, scowling at the group of men you can’t see. “and why did you guys come back?”

when shion’s lips lean closer to your ear, hot breath fanning the side of your face, your voice falters. the question dies out, tongue starting to dry. you have to suppress the filthy little sound you almost let out when he nibbles on your earlobe.

“you knew it was me?” you gulp when his voice turns deeper, lowered to a darkened pitch that you are ashamed to admit has gone down to your core. room growing hotter. the icy loneliness dissipated the moment they all walked back in, and even so your nipples are erect against your top.

you want to blame it on the cold, but you aren’t fooling any of them with that excuse. instead, you try to turn the situation around, gaining control and drawing another line.

“you didn’t answer my question.”

“you didn’t answer his.” bold as ever, izana takes the control off your hands unapologetically so. previous fondness gone, reserved in his heart for his full desires to let loose. at least, it’s what they all promised to do before clicking your floor’s button again.

deciding against remarking that you did ask first, you take one last deep breath. it’s filling and calming, not easing your erratic beating but doing wonders to clear your head. you don’t know what to do, having them all on your side, a stupid line long forgotten. is giving in to them your best choice?

or rather— is what you have always wanted the best choice?

with your next answer, soft spoken and sincere, you have erased any chance of such a line existing again. the fate of the night has been set, written in the stars watching behind your windows. destiny promised to the moon, gifting all of you the pleasure you’ve been seeking for.

“of course i know it’s him. i know each and every one of you.” because you love them, and because they love you so much too, they’ll help you without a doubt. in the nastiest way they can, but they’ll keep that to themselves.

for a brief second, shion’s hands leave your face to have you see them all. with barely any time to register the image of their eager eyes and hungry mouths, you are grabbed by the aforementioned and pushed to the bed, where you are now sitting on his lap. hands back to your eyes, nerves corrupting your mind.

biting back a whimper when your ass inevitably bumps into his clothed crotch, you notice shion’s breath staggers as well. it’s not too evident yet, but you know his cock will turn much harder, the wet kiss he gives your nape leaving a trail of goosebumps down your back.

you press your thighs —already close together— much harsher. the friction isn’t helping, but you don’t want shion to feel your throbbing cunt at the thought of what could happen. of what is sure to happen.

“we know you’d be awake tonight, still scared of us dying.” izana’s voice, under the sturdy curtain of playfulness, carries heed. their eagerness however, mixes in to give the atmosphere a knot of tension that must be undone. forming for years, but so fragile. “we want to help you forget, for you to relax.”

he doesn’t specify how they’ll do that; you don’t want to ask either. their response comes in heavy footsteps, a presence stopping right ahead of you, breaths heavy and fervent. then, your own breathing halts, leaning towards the anticipating uncertainty.

a hand is tamely placed on your cheek. huge, with big long fingers, and cosy, making you lean your head towards his hold. touch mild despite the brutality you know it unleashes, but you bathe in the traces lit up with craving fire as it slides down your face. moving down towards your chest, where a single finger circles around your covered boobs, crossing to your nipples to play with their hardness. his thumb joins to pinch one, your muted moan silenced by shion’s groaning at your ass’ moving.

“do you know who’s touching you now?” the latter wonders, tone low and full of need. through quick breaths he regains his composure, but his straining cock calls for your pulsating cunt so desperately.

unknown hand making its way below, it stops right above your clothed pussy. with its lone force he parts your legs apart, giving light slaps to the thin fabric of your pijama. you hum, leaning your head back to shion’s shoulder, legs making more way for the hand to go deeper.

it does, taking the hem of your pants and sliding them down to your ankles, where you make quick work to get rid of them. your panties are on full display, the darkened spot from your arousal a feast for their eyes. his lone finger once again slides against your underwear, the damp circle having the boy licking his dry lips. meddling with your entrance, but never quite entering, you want to beg him too, so badly. thought scrapped when his finger presses through to the wet mess that is your sex.

“yasuhiro…” you whisper, a primal want dressing it as a throaty moan leaving you to shudder in place. the mention of his first name, uttered so airily, sends blood rushing straight to his cock, giving an angry twitch silenced by his pants.

whining when mucho’s finger leaves your arousal, moving up to the hem of your panties, it singlehandedly pulls them down. legs moving to aid him in taking them off, letting the cool air be the first to taste your naked folds, covered in shining slick as it begins to clench around nothing.

“you want us that much, it’s good to know.” mucho declares, underwear pending on his index finger as he shows it to the rest, too distracted on your bare wetness. he discards it somewhere across the room, the sound of his voice so sensual to your growing impatience. “we want you so much, too.”

easy to tell by your dampened shoulder, where shion has let out a glob of his drool at the sight of you. fully hard cock pressed against your bare ass, rubbing your plump skin as he swallows all spit from his hunger. you don’t care, clenching your jaw at the absence of attention at yourself, your hands still as you know it wouldn’t be enough.

“such a beautiful pussy, so wet and needy.” is all mucho says before leaving your side, having you want to cling onto him and pull him closer with your wrapped legs. nevertheless, a new pair of hands rest on your thighs, just as big but way softer. tender skin well taken care of, rubbing your flesh near your core.

he’s graceful with his ministrations, long fingers ghosting over your clit. it’s easy to tell who carries himself with such elegance, dainty hands so curious yet sure of what to do. confirmed when his tongue licks its way up your cunt, lapping at your slick folds and sucking the plump flesh.

his tongue penetrates you, curling around to reach every spot it can get. you convulse around him, his insatiable mouth never getting enough of your slit, taking all the juices he can get. you wrap your legs around him, imprisoning him to your pussy. being barely able to register shion’s questioning, so eager to get an answer out of you.

“do you know who’s eating you out? can you tell?” you don’t say a word, poking your tongue out as you can only let out strangled noises. muttered cries for more, drool falling out of the corners of your lips.

your lack of a response isn’t welcomed. the confirmation of who’s hungrily devouring you coming when his pointy nose flickers your clit. choking your sobs at the tightness on your lower stomach, so willing to come undone as you buck your hips into his face —a feeble try to ride his big nose.

“oh—fuck!” you cry out, hearing the braided man slurping on your slick. cunt pulsing, begging for something more to fill it with. hands to the top of his head, ruining his perfectly combed hair with your grip. “ran, it’s ran!”

and for a job well done, he leaves your pussy unattended to give your clit a thankful kiss, resounding in the silent room. you hate it when his strength is much more than your own, pulling away from your hold. all the buildup inside you for naught.

shion’s tongue moves fast to wipe out your saliva, cleaning your lips and replacing the shine with his own. offering a chaste kiss to your cheek, at the same time that ran licks his lips with a content sigh.

“tastes so good, could eat her for hours.” he tells the rest. savoring the flavor of you inside his mouth, he gathers what is left around his lips and nose.

without much time to prepare for what’s next, as everyone in the room has grown eager to have you, your body writhes from the disturbance of a thick, prodding finger inside your cunt. walls squeezing the single digit, unmoving, a victorious grin on the man’s face at the spectacle you offer by thrusting your hips into his finger —fucking yourself with it.

shion’s breezy moans in the background don’t help his case in having the voice of the group. recomposing himself from the implacable grinding his dick receives. this time, he stutters, his hold on you turning frail. he doesn’t sound so cocky now, restraint crumbling without having any hands to pick it up with.

“a—and do you know whose finger is in— si—inside you right now?” he finishes with one long inhale, teeth biting his bottom lip.

on the other hand, you fight off the brimming tears in your eyes with your grinding. lengthy finger shoved in fully so that his knuckles are pressed against you, bruised and battered. less kept together but so welcomed by your walls anyway.

“mo—mochi.” you answer almost immediately, hopeful that he would do something to reward you for it. for his finger to pound you relentlessly until you finally cum. the thought alone sends you to clench around him, asking for more.

but mochi turns out to be sadistic, taking out his finger coated in your essence. you don’t see how he brings it up to his mouth, taking it fully to lap at your slick with an echoing pop. your breath hitches, shion’s pants now wearing darker stains.

“no first name for me?” he mocks you, teasing grin growing wider. silence greets him, and he does well to beat it by causing the first scream of the long night ahead. shoving three of his fingers inside your cunt, unannounced.

they curl, setting a merciless pace of back and forth to reach as deep as he can. the squelching sounds accompanied by your uncontrollable moans, high pitched and cursing out. the pressure builds once again in your stomach, back arching so his tough fingers can keep touching you in every spot possible.

“ah! kanji— sorry, so sorry kanji!” you beg for him to forgive you, spewing out apology after apology between the growing tears and trailing drool.

“it’s ok sweetheart, i love you.” he reassures you. so nice to you, your walls thank him by closing in on him. so good for him, leaving him to grunt from how obedient you are being.

“love you t—“ you want to tell him and the rest of them, in all its glory now that all limits have been broken and left behind.

however, rindou seems to have other plans, shoving mochi away not caring about his shouted protests nor your mewling at the emptiness of your pussy once again. orgasm denied for the second time, rindou’s weight bringing you to lie down on top of shion, lips chasing after your own.

they join together in a feverish kiss, viciousness bringing you two to a world of just both. lips tasting one another; tongues playing with each other, in such an aggressive way spit makes it way down your mouths and to your bumping chins. noses hitting as rindou tries to get even closer to you.

shion’s hands are forced out of your eyes, having you witness in the dead of the night, swimming in darkness, the pile of clothes by the bed. the men are all in front, almost naked if it weren’t for their underwear. doing little to cover their blazing erections.

“want you s’bad.” he breaks the kiss, a thin string of saliva connecting the two of you. mumbled so close to your lips, he takes yours in his without hesitation, teeth clashing and tongues entangled.

you wrap your arms around his neck, fingers ghosting over the streaks of black ink swirling through his back. muscles tense, he groans in your mouth and lowers his hips to your core. clothed cock rubbing against your folds, looking for more friction as he moves faster.

beside you, shion undresses, glancing over to rindou picking you up to kneel ahead of him, arms wrapped around your waist. empty thumps are heard from his grinding, and he decides to crawl his way behind you to help him in getting rid of your top.

effortlessly, they succeed in having you be the first to be completely naked. both men ogling your body up and down. your curves, every inch and crevice of your skin a feast for all of them. some palming their cocks through the fabric, others like rindou and shion, marking you with their mouths.

“so divine.” rindou mumbles, his arms and shion’s controlling your squirming from pleasure. hot breath trailing down to your naked boobs, hands drawing shapes on your flesh. “gorgeous body, all for us.”

you want to nod, instead drooling at their two hard cocks caging you between them. shion grabbing your ass cheek, playing with the molding skin by stiffening his grip. you moan their names, the covered contact insufficient.

“want your cocks, want you inside please.” begging for them, your hands make their way down to grab at their clothed dicks. both men pant, fingers wrapped around their lengths, feeling their hardened girths. “please fuck me.”

and with that said, both of them take off their underwear to have it join the rest of sprawled out clothes. in the dim lighting, with only the moon and the stars as witnesses, only the sparkling light in your pupils guides you to your instincts. so famished, tongue watering at rindou’s erected cock, intimidating as it stands —starving for your pussylips.

he’s big and very thick, a single protruding vein running down his length. red, angry tip, leaking precum and leaving it to slide down to pool around the base of his shaft. balls full and large, saliva drowning your mouth.

shion doesn’t stay far behind, not as big and way thinner, curving slightly to the right. his veins aren’t as marked but there are many, cockhead thick and itching to bury itself inside you. fat drop of precum waiting to fall into the mattress.

with a hand he guides his member to your folds, gathering all the wetness he can get. having you moan against rindou’s mouth, drowning any sound, you pull away to taste shion’s lips as well. spit mixing in with your eager tongues, hearing him swallow.

“can’t wait anymore.” you hear rindou complain, tip prodding at your entrance as he begins to penetrate you. a content sigh leaving your lips, whole length making its way past your tightened walls, cock molding the shape of your cunt to adjust to his size.

bottoming out, cockhead brushing your cervix, you and rindou moan in unison at eachother’s warmth. walls squeezing him so hard, his own cock buried in your wet pussy —the pressure so tempting to have you thrust against him.

and you do, bucking your hips onto his twitching cock, balls slapping your skin to create the filthiest of sounds. wet plops from rindou’s pace sending you into a frenzy, meeting his rhythm so that the coiling tension thickens and explodes into your orgasm.

“taking me in so well— fuck—“ although you can’t register rindou’s praises too well, shion’s rutting against your ass beginning to change into the intrusion of his dick inside your hole. pushing his way in with a single thrust —your very own slick acting out as lube.

you yell out his name when he hisses yours, spreading your ass open as his cock splits you apart. both holes completely filled, hints of pain slapped off by rindou’s fastening pumps. gripping shion so well, clenching around his girth and feeling every vein slide past your heated flesh.

“too much! s’good…” you cry out, the first set of tears coming out from your shut eyes. joining the threads of saliva you can’t keep in your mouth, mixing in on their way down your face.

the single vein running down rindou’s shaft ravages your walls so roughly. their tempo matching so that you never feel utterly empty, balls shaking with each snap of their hips. ecstasy choking you when rindou’s tip kisses your g-spot, relentlessly going at it so that more tears stain your vision —hazy and blurry.

you can distinguish izana’s nearing body, hand on his cock while he gives it a few pumps. he leans closer to your face, same fingers coated in his cum wiping your closed eyes. painting your face, you hum, growing hot as you convulse around both of the men’s cocks. answering you by pulsing through your clenching walls.

“these are the tears i love to see.” giving his finger a kitten lick, saltiness of your pleasure melting in his tongue, izana takes your limp hand and brings it up to his dick. “want to shower your face with my cum. you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

you nod, hand taking his cock and stroking it with deep movements. barely keeping it together with the sloppy pace both cocks inside you are falling into, forcing you to sometimes squeeze his length, drawing out throaty moans from the dark skinned man.

your cool fingers gliding past his searing meat make of him a fervent mess, hips bucking to fuck himself with your hand. head on rindou’s shoulder, you stare at his own tilted back, adam’s apple bobbing as your name is the only thing his lips can say.

“cutie your ass is so tight.” shion drags his cock out with difficulty, hole so adamant in keeping him in. only his tip rests inside, forcing your ass to remember his shape. “gonna fill it up, alright?”

he doesn’t leave room for answers, burying himself deep inside until your vision turns blind. rindou’s cock mimicking his actions, growing at the thought of your cunt taking all of his cum.

“gonna cum—“ you spit out, rindou’s shoulder welcoming your saliva and tears, joining his thin layer of sweat. “cumming, i’m cumming!”

“me too.” it escapes past his kissing teeth, the tremors of your body having him give one last powerful thrust before stilling inside of you. rolling his eyes, his risen shoulders relax once his orgasm crashes upon him. “keep it inside for me, will you?”

you do, for both of them emptying themselves inside of you. hot strings of sticky cum crawling into your holes, painting your walls white and having them spasm and contract as you let your own orgasm wash rindou’s length. he doesn’t let it run out, fucking the union of your juices back into you, not a single drop wasted. feeling so full, heaving out praises to both blushing boys.

“our good girl.” shion pats your head, soft kiss on your back and hands fondling your tits. you regain your breath still by rindou’s shoulder, knowing it’s not over yet with the way izana’s cockhead nears your face.

the two boys’ cocks leave your holes the moment izana’s twitches. releasing his load on your face, reaching your lashes, forehead and cheeks. streaks of cum painting your skin in a dense white, giving the last touch to your fucked out expression.

“god i love you so much.” admiring his work, and the way your cunt and asshole fight desperately to keep shion and rindou’s seeds. his smile broadens at the thought that this is just getting started.

indeed, mochi’s next in taking you into his arms, so small compared to his size. you don’t have time to regain your breath, composure crushed by the brutality of the s-62, quivering at mochi’s frosting hands.

“so sensitive already, sweetheart.” and so easy to handle, too. moving you as he pleases, lying down on the bed and having you on his chest, right above his underwear and bulging cock.

the big stain of precum is evident on the light grey fabric. an enormous bump waiting to be freed of its confined space. dark, trimmed hairs leading the way to his aching dick. your hands on his abs, stroking his built chest and floating up to his pecs.

his hands cup your ass, thumbs kneading the plush skin and hovering over your widened hole. you feel his dick jump up, taming him with a rock of your body pushed by your legs. he groans, guttural desire drying out his throat, starving for your glistening folds.

“can take it.” you promise him, small whisper loud in the quietude of your room. where the men touch themselves to the landscape of the shade of your figure plastered on the bright nightlife ahead of your windows.

he chuckles, vibrating chest so good for your throbbing pussy, waking up his cock even more. a hand trails up to your face, big thumb pinning your bottom lip. his tongue wetting his lips.

“course you will.” he says it like it’s obvious, dragging down the swollen lip until your bottom teeth can be seen. fingers full of your saliva, drying patches from the previous crying making you look so filthy. exactly how he likes it. “want these lips around my big cock, gonna give you a full meal.”

grabbing onto your hips, he turns you around with one swift twirl. pulling your ass closer to him, legs on each side of his face lifting your lower body, back arching as you are laid down in front of his underwear. clenching around nothing at the compromising position, mochi’s first to dig in to your cunt —tongue flickering your clit so erratically, you purr.

alas, you now have to fully undress him, taking the rim of his clothes and sliding them to the middle of his crushing thighs. he wriggles his legs, aiding you in taking them off completely, widely grinning against your pussy when you gasp at the full size of his erection.

standing furiously near his chest, where your chin hovers above his pubes. the size is enormous, so thick and dressed in many veins that draw intricate curves on his meat, making him even wider. mushroom tip prominent, broad slit already seeping out so much precum. fat plumps of a dirtied white gliding down his whole length, pooling around his base where even bigger, heavy balls rest. your mouth waters at just how much cum he will give you, hurrying up when the tip of his nose lightly teases your entrance.

your hand takes his shaft, whimpering when you see the struggle your fingers have wrapping around it. you pump it once— twice, mochi’s groaning so good for your cunt, going down on his nose so that the tip enters you. when your lips near his head to give it open mouth kisses, wet plops taking bits of his salty cum, your hand holds his balls, playing with them as they barely fit inside.

you take his tip in your mouth, warmth enveloping his cock as you try to move down on him. only taking almost half of his length, breathing through your nose and hollowing out your cheeks, easing your throat as his hips buckle onto your face. his moaning going straight to your pussy, where he begins to grow desperate slurping on your juices. noises nasty, making you moan and tighten your throat on his cock. tongue darting to lick every crevice, drooling so much it accumulates at the base.

both continue the rhythm of your grinding bodies, building your climaxes and chasing after them. hunger making you frantic, savoring every bit of essence as if it were your last meals.

“looks so pretty.” you listen to mucho’s voice on your back, his hand on one of your cheeks. “but i think you can take more.”

he declares it so impassively, keeping his cool as always, that you don’t see his hand raised and profoundly slapping your ass. it jiggles, closing in on mochi’s pointed tongue licking slow stripes. you scream, muted against the wet heat in your mouth. another hand joins mucho, this time being ran’s long finger entering your ass, so sensitive from shion’s stretching not long ago.

both of their fingers buried knuckles deep, a third hand slaps you once again as they begin to stimulate your hole. their ministrations along with mochi’s starved devouring pushing you to take more of the latter’s dick, gagging through parted lips as you take him fully —choking on his tip at the very back of your throat.

nose pressed against his bouncing balls, fucking your face as you do the same to his nose and tongue. your chin scratched by the bush near his shaft, you cry out feeble attempts of his name as more spit leaves your lips, fat tears joining.

“there we go pretty!” seems the third hand belongs to izana, cheering you through the orgasm that pours down onto mochi’s face. giving one more hard slap that sends your skin tingling, trapping mucho and ran’s fingers on your ass, finally letting loose.

you come undone, flooding mochi’s face with your cum and crushing his face with your thighs. he doesn’t seem to care, lapping at your cum without shame, drinking it until nothing is left out, before joining you and snapping his hips to release his load.

it’s dense, so much cum leaving his cock you can barely swallow it all. hot spurts abusing your throat, leaving thick trails out the corners of your lips that you’ll take care of later. it keeps fluttering, but never once you leave it unattended, making sure all of his semen is sucked dry. breathing in when you let it go, tip of your tongue gathering what little is around your lips.

you swallow it down loudly, the echoing plop from your mouth leaving his cock free so gratifying for his ears. he gives your cunt a mellow kiss, tenderness fighting off his roughness.

“good girl.” he coos, readjusting you as he pleases so that you now lie in his direction, ass against his still hard cock. he holds your chin and turns your head around to his, deeply kissing you, passing down the rest of your orgasm so you can taste the sweetness he did. “we love you so much, you are perfect for us.”

and you smile, fond and big it has their hearts pounding in their chests. you kiss the tip of his nose, giddy from their worship.

however, mochi moves up so that his head rests on your pillow. hands tracing patterns on your skin, watching your stomach rise from the harsh breaths you are taking.

“got one more in me.” he mutters close to your ear, feet parting your legs open, showing the rest your abused holes. “will you be a sweetheart and take it?”

how can you deny him when he asks so politely? previous fingering helping you for what will happen now, cock rubbing through your ass cheeks, willing to take his big dick to split you apart. pushing in, slowly making his way through unlike shion’s desperate entrance.

you wriggle in his hold, mochi shushing you by whispering sweet nothings into your ear. wailing at the size you have to adjust to, a little easier thanks to shion. your cum stained face is full of fresh tears and brand new globs of spit. tongue lolling out of your parted lips when he bottoms out.

buried deep inside your ass, filling you to the brim with each thick vein hitting you just right. your squinted eyes widen tremendously at mochi’s calling, gripping him so tightly at the idea of being torn apart by the two biggest.

“mucho, wanna join in? she wants it.” and he doesn’t hesitate to crawl up to where you are, underwear long gone. his cock isn’t much different from mochi’s, less thicker but way longer, looking so delicious against his chiseled chest.

he takes your legs, having them bend down near your shoulders, leaving so much room to hit even deeper. entranced by your wet cunt, glossy and begging for his cock to break it. and who is he to say no to his woman?

in one swift plunge, he finds himself buried to the hilt. balls swinging as the sound of smacking flesh from his ruthless penetration elicits the most pornographic moan he has ever heard from you. massaging his cock just the way he likes it, sponging walls enclosing the space and making him feel impossibly closer.

“so fucking tight— god, fuck!” he growls, pushing you to mochi’s chest, boobs pressed against mucho’s big —worked out— pecs. sandwiched between both men, ruining your insides just by staying still, you sob for them to ruin you —to move faster.

“s’big… ‘s too big—” your incoherent mumbles become higher in tone, allowing them to rock your body as they please. trying to meet their hips as they pound you dumb, reckless rocking making you cry out in ecstasy. “lov— love you s’much. luv your cocks s’much.”

your babbling pushes them to thrust harder. having you whine when mucho stops and his hand lightly slaps your cum covered cheek, calling for your attention. you look up at him, teary eyes sending heat straight to his cock, throbbing against your cunt.

“you see that?” he points down at your belly, a small bulge making it stick out. you take your hand to trace its shape, a silent chuckle gifting hints of happiness to your fucked out face. “that’s my cock, babygirl.”

and you love it, he knows you do. picking up his pace to meet mochi’s, so engrossed in your ass. he doesn’t want this moment to end.

you don’t notice how both of your hands are taken by shion and rindou, hard once again. but they know you don’t care when each hand takes their cocks, already familiar to you, beginning to masturbate them. their moaning helping your orgasm build up, this time stronger, with mucho ruthlessly pounding against your g-spot.

your head turns to the side, coming face to face with ran’s dick. he slaps you with it, playing with your hanging tongue by wetting it with your saliva. you stare up at his innocent grin, him looking down with dilated pupils.

“there’s still a hole unoccupied.” he simply mentions, cock twitching when your hand pulls the foreskin back to expose his angry head. so pale and long you don’t know what you’ll do to make it fit. curving up, he applies his precum to your lips like gloss, pushing in with his hips until he’s balls deep into your mouth.

body used by all of them, including izana whose hands are on your swollen clit, it doesn’t take long for your legs to begin their uncontrollable tremble. this time’s different, your moans turning into shrill shouting as a stream of tears run down your eyes, closed in bliss as you begin to see stars.

your third orgasm hits you harder than any other, right after mochi cums for the second time filling you up to the brim with his huge loads. you begin squirting all over mucho’s cock, squelching sounds getting wetter as more and more cum leaves out of you in hot spurts. he takes it out, watching as you make a mess of mochi’s legs, the mattress and his abs.

“shit!” you moan out, cum gliding down mucho’s cock that has entered you again. though your words are muffled by ran’s dick around your lips, you continue squirting out all your juices, milking out mucho’s cock in the process.

he has so much cum too, cunt stuffed full of his own after your mind blowing orgasm. balls drenched as well, but his smile tells you enough, and you don’t feel ashamed of it —even better, only proud.

pulling away, despite mochi’s cock still buried into your ass, he leaves your chest free for shion and rindou, who don’t take too long in covering your tits and stomach with their loads. satisfied groans out of their lips as they admire their work, thick globs of white on your sweaty skin.

ran’s the last to empty out his cum, doing it inside your mouth much like mochi. you take it all without hesitation, opening wide for him to see you gulping down his seed. uttering a sigh when you’ve eaten it fully, kissing the tip of his cock for a job well done.

“nasty little whore.” you have no idea who says it, the loss of mochi’s dick as he comes out of you taking over your mind. oozing cum follows, filthy trickles running down into your cunt, where you do a good job in retaining what they have given you. “our perfect slut, should’ve done this sooner.”

you agree, spent after three rough orgasms. alas, you see two men staying on the bed —two men that haven’t been inside of you yet. but you are so sore you don’t know if you can take them. such big cocks just like the rest of them.

“we want to taste you, too.” it’s ran’s voice, the one he uses when he wants something. turning innocent, words so tender they heal your tiredness with dulcet touches. you hate when he does that, falling for it every time. “you’ll let us, right? we’ll be gentle, i promise.”

your moans are so loud with each touch, both izana and ran standing you up on your knees, between both of their bodies. you teeter, head tumbling towards the man you have in front, which turns out to be the older haitani. shoulder so comfortable, you nuzzle closer to the side of his neck, kissing it.

your pussy takes him right up, so tight despite being so used throughout the night. he’s washed in the remains of your orgasm, easy for him to move, but he doesn’t. you wonder why, whining against his neck and jumping on his cock, legs quivering so hard you know it won’t take you much to cum again.

instead, a second cock makes its way up your cunt, having you scream out for your fourth orgasm at the close fit of both dicks inside your pussy. they rub one another, not appearing to care too much as both of their eyes are closed, jaws clenched. you squeeze them, adjusting to their size and ignoring the pain for the cum sliding down past them.

you’re crying, tears licked by izana’s tongue as he rejoices in them. no longer are you sobbing from fear, but so destroyed by each and every one of them you have nothing left of you but scorching pleasure.

“already?” he purrs, dragging his cock out just to thrust once more. skin gliding past ran’s veiny shaft, making him move as well, desperate for his release. “but you’ll let us cum, won’t you? after we’ve been so good to you��”

he trails off, falling into rhythm with ran, abusing your cunt for a little while longer. convulsing against them, forcing them closer, tightening your walls so that you can get out another orgasm for them. to show how grateful you are.

“we’ve been so helpful, haven’t we?” he slaps your clit, ran’s lips latching onto your nipples, sucking them clean. chest pressed on his own, sticky cum joining your bodies.

“yes! want you to cum in me.” you cry out, hips meeting their thrusts, bouncing on both of their cocks, balls slapping your pussy. “want you to stuff me!”

tongue poking out, ran moves up to take it between his lips, playing with it in his mouth. pulling his lips to yours in a messy kiss, so full of exchanged spit and trailing drool to your chins. you love it, you love them, and you show them by squeezing them so tightly they have no choice but to fill you up with their cum.

“well, pretty girl, take it.” izana grunts, and with one big roll of his hips, he empties himself inside of you. ran follows suit, whimpers and moans drowned out by eachother’s mouths.

you join them with your last orgasm of the night, leaving you barely conscious on the bed, drenching their cocks with one last wave of cum. you stay there, sprawled out on the bed for all to see, face full of dried out tears, so many different salivas around your swollen lips and remnants of izana’s cum. your body follows suit, drenched in sweat and thick lines of cum following down to the small little bulge on your stomach.

it’s mucho’s hand that presses that tiny bump, all watching as all the cum you’ve tried so desperately to keep inside oozes out of your beaten cunt, huge loads wetting the bed below you. your ass much of the same. you groan, whimpering at his touch, hips bucking unconsciously.

and with two fingers, mucho again shoves some of their seeds back inside, to leave you full. you close your legs, stretching your sore muscles from all the rough handling tonight. the moon’s still up, and its glow is casted above you, giving your enamored smile and angelic touch.

they all lie around you, circling you. shion and mochi on your thighs, rindou and mucho by your chest, and ran and izana near your head. soothing your muscles, kissing every spot they can.

“thank you.” it’s honest, despite the pain it brought, you enjoyed it more than anyone you are sure. in the darkest corner of your heart, it’s what you’ve always wanted, and you got it.

izana doesn’t want to ask if there’s any other thought inside your head that isn’t what just happened. after all, they’ve fucked you dumb. you have a hard time opening your eyes, breaths still long and shallow with huffing here and there.

he’s relieved, your suffering fully gone, consumed by their yearning. leaning down, his lips peck yours, back of his fingers brushing the side of your face.

“we’ve loved you like this for such a long time.” ran confesses, so vulnerable post-sex you love it. always having it hard to open his heart to what he’s feeling, trying to shove it in with insecure cockiness. you are glad it’s him who declares it.

your finger boops his nose, the two of you sharing childish laughter.

“me too.” you whisper, wanting to pat the other’s heads. to show them that you consider them, always. “but it’s all good, now i’m yours.”

and it felt so good to hear, meaning twisted to turn more romantic. more heartfelt, something they aren’t used to, but you’ll give it to them every time they need it.

“and all of us belong to you, but that’s nothing new.” you chuckle at shion’s words, legs numb and body resting. the bed becomes more plush to your body, hugging you and lulling for you to sleep. you try so hard to fight it, never wanting the moon to leave. for this to become a memory.

“i wish for this night to never end. to stay like this forever.” you dream, a foolish one. the moon will always leave and the sun will replace it, and this would only have belonged to the night before doomsday comes.

“c’mon, let’s give you a warm bath.” mochi says before you doze off into a deep slumber. missing their soft cleaning and the close attention to your body. praising it, worshipping all it has done for their enjoyment. they thank you in warm kisses and dark hickeys, thinking to themselves that after tonight, the result of tomorrow cannot escape their grasps.

they must win, for the woman so full of love for them. so that they can live their lives as one, together forever. and perhaps, all of you should have dreamed harder, because the memory of tonight would be the last between you all.

izana and mucho taken away by death’s greedy hands. you, having fallen so deep into a sea of darkness, you had to escape before it all consumed you. the only ones to hold this night close to their hearts, having their friends engraved in hanafuda and your love in their chests, where your initials rest.

everyone of you looking up at the moon every night, begging for her to take you back to that night —the night before doomsday comes.

— end —

good or bad i’m throwing it out there that english isn’t my first language. thank you for reading <3 our troops are so brave, getting through this whole thing and ending up with brain trauma (probably) anyway, reblogs are appreciated :) it’s like a pat on my back (yipee)

( @tenjikusstuff4 @luminouslaybyrinth @idekwhatimdoingsblog )

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helplessautomaton · 1 month ago

Text

Yandere Daisuke

WC 622

not posting this from my laptop so things might look a bit off, apologies. also this is my first fic back since june!!. also i wrote this in like 30 mintues,,,

also might be slightly ooc, if it is sorry but still try to enjoy my spin on the character!!

yandere daisuke drabbles since im still kinda getting in the fandom (couldnt buy the game but watched a video going in detail abt so if anything is amiss, that is why!)

a useless ray of sunshine, daisuke. wanting to look at the brighter side of the situation you all were in. attached to your hip, smiling brightly as ever. remembering when you two first met, along with everyone else. not exactly fit in but tried to make it work while being optimistic in the compacted environment of the Tuplar walls. since you were near the same age as Daisuke, you got the most time spent with him. goofy, a bit stumblely but overall trying his best, giving nervous smiles when ever Swansea scolded him for messing around.

as days went by you two got closer, beaming as he saw you, getting more excited which meant he was a bit more loud, earning glares from the othersides of the room. inside your heart was happy that you got this close with someone this fast and near your age, even if your grumpy old man coworker scolded you more than the hours you spent working. but it was the silent acknowledgement he didnt truly mind you two.

his body going tense whenever jimmy had shot a nasty comment in your way, belittling you with dismissive eyes. daisuke immediately pulling you away with slightly less than ginger hands, while giving somewhat of an empty look. then just as quickly beaming back up using any excuse he could to get you two out of there. opening his heart up to you like always, so even if you shift uncomfortably, you'll stay with him just a bit longer. gentle tears dropping down his face saying hes just so happy you stick with him, your coworker, when youre going through hard-to-speak-about emotions. you couldnt tell if he was getting dependent on you, following you around more, always wearing a smile plastered on his face. looks you'll never see but everyone around you sees, brushing daisuke's eyes of odd character off, but instead "joking" at your confused expression when they tell you of daisuke's sudden stares.

when you're done with anya's psych evaluation, hes waiting for you, taking off with you despite your quiet protests. taking up all the time you have as everyone else gets slighly more frustrated.

after the crash hes more clingly, not willing to leave your side ever even if you get yelled at by swansea or even jimmy. daisuke is always checking your form for any injuries you might or did get. still trying to make you see his optimistic side in all of this, even though he's shaking a little with you in his arms. even if anya wanted to come near you, he'd usher her away saying that you need time, he just cares about his about his friend yknow! swansea is getting more tense and you try to tighten up to give him less of a headache during this stress. but daisuke insists of being there even when swansea is losing his cool and you're exasperated trying to tell him to get on a break.

jimmy cant get a few words in before your spun away or daisuke tries to get him to leave. you get drunk with daisuke and he spills his heart to you even more with how he even got to be here by his parents. saying how they wouldve loved you, anything he could think of, he said. the boy drunkly hugged you securely on the tiles of the Tuplar's rough ground. he wanted to be by yourside to the end and make everything worth it despite the current tragedy.

god forbid if you died before him..

#mouthwashing x reader #yandere mouthwashing #mouthwashing #daisuke mouthwashing #yandere #yandere daisuke

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signedeclipse · 2 years ago

Note

Please could i request a oneshot of Haganezuka meeting and falling in love with a hashira reader (Tanjiro’s older sibling) 💙💙

One More Time [Haganezuka X Reader]

Reader is Human Gender Neutral | Fluff + Romance

Recomended Song - Rather Be by Clean Bandit

It wasn't his first sword delivery, but Hotaru had never been assigned to a slayer permanently before, having only made swords for beginners of the corps or for practice, since most upper ranks in the corps chose older, more seasoned nichirin swordsmiths.

Part of him was excited, being able to tend to an individual's abilities and forge something more unique, as opposed to the clear cut ones most starter blades were.

The other part was frustrating, because it wasn't for anyone unique, no one had specifically chosen him, just a random assignment since all the others had enough to care for. Still, he tried to feel grateful that this was a chance at becoming more reputable.

He remembered his first encounter with the Kamado, the excitement at the idea of a red blade, the disappointment that followed.

It all loomed over him now that the Kamado name had long since grown. It was hard not to recognize such a unique family; a demon, one of the fastest-growing slayers, and the sun hashira. While he wasn't one to take back his words so easily, he was reminded by the chief to bite his tongue the next time he tried mouthing off to the family.

But luck had not been on his side.

When news got back to him that Tanjiro had broken his blade for the second time, Hotaru felt a mix of anger and shame.

Anger that once again his craftsmanship had not been enough, and shame at the idea that it'd likely happen again were he not more careful.

The idea flashed across his mind that his failure twice in a row might mean he would lose Tanjiro as a client of sorts, or that he would be forced to resign from being a swordsmith, so he avoided confronting or contacting him in favour of preparing himself to make the best blade imaginable.

There he was, as the sun had barely begun to rise and the sky was a mid-blue hue, casting the village and its surroundings in a cool tone. Though he slept soundly, he woke up before anyone else got the chance so he could get a head start on his exercises, which gave him time to ponder how long he had before Tanjiro came to him instead.

"So, you must be Haganezuka."

The voice almost startled him from his perch atop a cliffside, though he barely showed it besides the clenching of his fists. The voice was entirely unfamiliar, though before he could turn to look at them their presence had moved.

"Is that a yes?" You were to his right, which he turned to finally meet the individual who had managed to find him.

While still taken back by the speed at which you had moved, he was also very surprised to see the same maroon eyes as Kamado, except it was clear that you were no Tanjiro.

"Well, I'm sure you've realised who I am, but you can just refer to me as Kamado."

Hotaru had not expected your presence in the village, had you been sent in place of your brother?

"I don't have a blade ready yet." Haganezuka had bowed his head slightly. He could run and be stubborn all he wanted, but Hashira could be far more harsh in punishment.

"Blade? I'm not- no-" You had let out a string of laughs, facing away from him and covering your mouth to suppress the giggles. He looked so worried! Even if you hadn't seen his face, the atmosphere around him had certainly dropped.

"It's his first time in the village, I couldn't miss it! Well, that and my swordsmith will be retiring, so I'm here to meet some of the newer generations and pick someone I feel is capable. I was never a fan of blind recommendations." While you spoke, Hotaru had straightened out his posture and looked back out at the village, the sun now growing the area with orange rays.

You were very relaxed, and far more talkative than any hashira he had met, so any intimidation he felt melted away, especially considering you weren't here to scold him.

"Anyways, I hope you give my little brother a hard time, sometimes I think he gets it too easy because of his kindness, and he needs to be ready to combat issues that aren't life-threatening..." Judging by your words, you hadn't seen Haganezuka chasing after your sibling with knives, which relieved him.

Still pouting from his faulty blades, he kept silent, deciding he didn't want to say much if more to prove a point for himself.

By the time he glanced to his right again, you were long gone, with nothing but the imprint of where you sat left in the grass.

The next time he saw you, you were with Kanamori, who held two nichirin blades that had seen better days.

Having been found by Tanjiro and been given the blade he was to repair, Hotaru was on his way to eat and prepare for the gruelling 72 hours worth of work he had ahead of him.

Despite the raging inspiration he felt, you had stopped him dead in his tracks, pulling all the air from him until he felt weak again. Hotaru hadn't realised how much he'd hoped to see you again, and you were still here.

"Ah, have you met my good friend, Haganezuka?" Kanamori motioned to the taller swordsmith, who you noticed now had a wide hat fit with chimes...and his upper torso was revealed, the rest of his clothes wrapped around his waist.

You nodded, smiling and waving to the surprisingly well-built swordsmith, trying to hide your rosy cheeks with a smile.

"I have, but, it's a long story." Shrugging your shoulders, Kanamori hummed pleasantly, before returning to a slow strive towards his workshop, pulling you along considering your arms were linked.

Apparently, Kanamori had experience with dual blades, so you had chosen him for his kind personality and experience since you were a dual wielder.

Before you had entirely left, you turned to look back at Haganezuka, throwing a thumbs up.

"You better make sure this one doesn't break!! I'm trusting you!"

Of course, he would have to make the best blade he could manage, for Tanjiro; if not to prove himself as a worthy swordsmith, then to impress the eldest Kamado.

Author Note - For some reason this took me so long to write I get procrasinating but WE GOT ER DOWN!!! Thank you for requesting <3

Word Count - 1,058

Art Credit - Kimetsu No Yaiba (2019)

#haganezuka #haganezuka x reader #demon slayer #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer oneshots #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #kny x reader #kny oneshots #oneshot #x reader #reader insert

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itsgodepi · 12 days ago

Text

If I lose my mind | Ch. 12

Series summary: When you're buried under a mountain of problems and can’t seem to catch a break, it might feel like you need a complete reset. But did it really have to come with a one-way ticket to a new dimension? Surely, a couple problem-solving courses would’ve done the trick. Or, one day you go to sleep as a normal person and the next you wake up as a Formula One driver. You've never been a fan but isn't it like, one of the most exclusive sports? Pairing: CL16, LH44, CS55, DR3 x reader Chapter: Previous | Next Word Count: 5,4k Also on AO3

The sun bears down with an almost tangible weight, each ray a fiery tendril pressing against your skin. What began as a blissful oasis—a magnificent sunbed that cradled you in its warm embrace after your swim in the icy water, rocking you to the rhythm of the lapping waves—has betrayed you. The once-soft fabric and plush cushions have gradually transformed into a stifling grill beneath your back. Sweat beads at your temples, and the tingling heat along your shoulders hints at a sunburn brewing just beneath the surface

With a sigh, you sit up, the teak deck creaking softly beneath you. The Mediterranean stretches endlessly in every direction, a tranquil expanse of sapphire shimmering under the sun’s golden touch. You slip into your sandals, the straps warm against your skin, and head toward the shaded back deck. If you're honest, when Carlos first mentioned his latest "shiny acquisition," you’d pictured a sleek little boat, perfect for a casual day on the water. Nothing could have prepared you for the sprawling luxury of the yacht anchored at the port outside his beach house this morning.

Just another reminder that you and Carlos don’t exactly share the same tax bracket.

The shaded area greets you with a rush of cooler air and the sight of Carlos lounging on a plush sofa, still in his swim trunks. His tanned skin glistens with the remnants of saltwater from your earlier swim, his eyes glued to his phone, a half-played chess game abandoned beside him.

You shake your head, smirking. He and Charles had been bickering all morning over chess strategies like two old men in a park. They’d finally decided to settle it with one last match, and you’d used the chance to escape and catch some sun. Clearly, they’d taken their sweet time.

Carlos notices your footsteps before you even reach him. His face lights up with that familiar grin, and as you approach, he puts his phone down and extends a hand toward you. His fingers slip around yours effortlessly, his thumb grazing your knuckles in a warm, unhurried motion. It’s oddly comforting, a habit of his that’s grown on you.

“Did you lose?” you ask, arching a brow at the abandoned game.

“Never,” he replies, the arrogance in his tone undercut by the grin tugging at his lips.

“Where’s Charles?”

“Talking on the phone. His mummy called,” Carlos quips, his tone teasing.

You roll your eyes, leaning in to flick his forehead with your intertwined hands. “Don’t act like you weren’t calling your mum this morning all like, ‘Mami, que nos vamos con el barco, (Mummy, we’re taking the boat)’” you mimic, your voice climbing to a falsetto.

Carlos laughs, the sound rich and unrestrained, though he tries to protest, “I don’t talk like that!”

“Que sí, mamá, que tenemos cuidado (Yes mom, we’ll be careful)” you continue, doubling down on your impersonation, complete with dramatic hand gestures. “Ya me he puesto crema, ¡no traigas más mamá! (I’ve alredy put oon sunscreen, don’t bring more!)”

His jaw drops at your performance, mock outrage lighting up his expression. “Stop making fun of me!” he exclaims, though his laughter betrays him. His free hand darts out to tickle your side, a sudden and ruthless retaliation.

“Hey, stop it!” you yelp, struggling to squirm away, but Carlos is far stronger. His previous grip on your hand prevents any real escape, and with his other hand, he mercilessly tickles you until your resistance falters. You trip in your attempt to escape, tumbling onto him.

“¡Que me tiras! (You’re going to make me fall!)” you gasp, half-laughing, half-protesting as you land awkwardly against him.

“That’s the plan,” he says smugly, locking his arms around you in a triumphant hug

“Carlos, I’m all sticky with suncream and sweating!”

“I don’t care!” he replies, his voice sing-song as he pulls you closer.

Despite yourself, you can’t help but laugh, the absurdity of the situation deflating your protests. The driver’s hold on you is inescapable, his strength far outmatching yours. His next words come as a triumphant whisper against your ear “Por lo menos he conseguido oírte hablar en español (At least I got you to talk in Spanish)”

“Huh?” You pull back slightly, blinking at him. He has a point —you don’t think you’ve ever had a proper conversation with him in Spanish. It’s not a conscious decision, you are always surrounded by non-Spanish speakers, and when he does approach you alone, he usually defaults to English.

It’s oddly endearing how pleased he seems with himself though.

“No tienes que practicar más tu inglés (You don’t have to practise your English no more),” he adds with a grin. “¡Ya sabes más que yo! (Already know more than I do!)”

“Sure, sure,” you reply, skeptical. You don’t really know what he is talking about, when did you ask him to practice your English?

“È meglio in italiano?” he switches languages, his grin widening.

“What did you say?” you ask, narrowing your eyes at him.

“C’mon, Charles told me you wanted to practice your Italian before Monza. You can practice with me too.”

Oh, Charles did mention something like that one of the first times you met him, even talked to you in Italian a couple times. You could never really follow the conversations, only understanding half of what he said because of your Spanish, so he didn’t push any further.

“I don’t know Italian,” you deflect, shaking your head.

“Two years in the Ferrari academy, and you didn’t pick up anything?” Carlos teases, his disbelief evident in his tone. His grin is wide, mischievous, and altogether too charming. You try to shrug it off, but his raised eyebrow signals he’s not letting you off the hook “That’s where you met Charles, right?”

You blink. New information. You really should speak Spanish with him more often if this is the kind of intel you’ll get.

“I guess,” you say nonchalantly, feigning indifference. Inside, though, you’re already planning to search about it the moment you get back.

Carlos narrows his eyes, suspicious of your evasiveness. “I guess?” His voice rises in mock exasperation, and then, before you can brace yourself, his hands attack your sides again in a relentless tickling assault.

“Okay, okay, stop!” you gasp, laughter bubbling uncontrollably from your chest as you twist and squirm, your hands blindly grappling for his wrists. His grip falters just enough for you to catch one hand, then the other, but the struggle only lands you in an even more precarious position: half-seated on top of him. “Fine! Yes, I knew him from there, before he was in Sauber. Happy now?”

Guess playing those guess the driver based on their teams challenges from tiktok had to come in handy at some point. You got addicted at those.

Carlos leans back slightly, utterly unfazed, not putting resistance against your hold. “See? That wasn’t so hard,” he teases, his voice as warm and smooth as the sunlit waves lapping against the boat, cradling you from side to side.

One of his hands settles casually on your hip when you let go, the other remaining loosely trapped in your grip.

“Whatever,” you mutter, but your tone lacks conviction. You let out a soft huff of air, trying and failing to suppress the smallest of smiles when he throws you a wink, boyish and entirely too charming.

You still can’t understand how he always manages to turn your interactions into moments like this — moments so tender and charged that they feel almost deliberate, yet completely unspoken. The way your eyes linger on each other, the way you’re so close, sometimes even holding one another. How easily you’ve slipped into this dynamic with the Ferrari driver.

Why doesn’t this closeness feel strange? You’ve known him for such a short time, and yet it feels natural, like you’ve always been this way. The gentle way your fingers trace patterns along his, the soothing circles his hand draws on your side, a gesture so unconscious it sends a quiet shiver up your spine.

‘It’s just Carlos’ you tell yourself, as if that’s enough. Carlos, with his disarming warmth, his easy-going nature and unguarded affection. He seems so comfortable with this closeness, so unafraid to seek it out with you — it’s simply who he is. With you.

And somehow, without a second thought, you let yourself sink into it.

“What are you thinking?” he murmurs, his voice soft enough to blend with the gentle crash of waves. His gaze is unwavering, those warm brown eyes studying your face with an intensity that makes your breath hitch.

The wind tousles his hair, leaving it a mess of dark strands framing his face. His bracelet catches the light as your fingers toy absently with the cord, the handmade piece adorned with his initials and the tiny Ferrari badge drawn on little white cubes. It’s a fan gift, of all things, but its presence now, between your hands, feels...

A pang shoots through your chest, the ache of it almost too much.

It’s not... real. None of this is real.

“Nothing, I’m…” you smile, the tremble on your lips so easily noticeable and so difficult to hide. “It’s just..., you know, this, and I’m...” you bite down on your tongue, physically restraining the words from escaping.

Forcing yourself to just shut up.

You take a breath in, trying to push down the thoughts that so easily started poisoning the moment. Your eyebrows draw together and you keep your eyes down, letting go of the cord of his bracelet like it’s burning.

It’s fake. Everything.

I’m scared, you want to say, I’m so fucking scared of this —of all of it. Thirty-six days of living this surreal, impossible life, of being thrust into a world of fast cars, flashing cameras, and unimaginable luxury. Of private boats and breathtaking views, of thinking how nice you fit into the arms of this amazing man. And the quiet horror of realizing how easily you could lose yourself in it.

“Carlos,” you begin, the words spilling out before you can stop them. But what are you supposed to say? That this isn’t real? The boat, this life, him? You glance at his expectant face, the furrowed brows, the quiet weight in his gaze. He’ll think you’ve lost it, that you’re going crazy under the weight of it all. “I don’t know how to say this, but I’m… you’re— none of this is—”

The sudden creak of the driving cabin door cuts through your faltering confession, and your head jerks up to see Charles stepping out, his phone clutched in one hand. He doesn’t notice you at first, his thumb furiously swiping at the screen.

He stops just short of the two of you, his gaze flicking up to you, then Carlos, and finally settling back on you. Something lingers in that glance, his green eyes catching the fading sunlight in a way that makes your stomach tighten.

“Think we should head back,” Charles mutters, his voice clipped, as though reluctant to interrupt. “Some weirdo’s been taking photos.”

Guess Charles wasn’t talking to his mum after all. Instead, it was someone from the Ferrari media team, calling to warn him about the photos of you that had been slowly making their way onto social media since this morning. They had just received a fresh batch of unseen ones just a couple minutes ago: a series of candid shots of the three of you, lounging on the boat, laughing, completely at ease, unaware of the long lenses pointed at you from the distance.

Both teams scramble to get the photos pulled, sending messages, making calls, trying to keep the damage contained. But it doesn’t take long for them to see the light. And, as expected, the reactions are far from kind.

_______

“You should stop looking at that” Charles advices, his voice even softer than usual as he sets the pile of plates and cutlery down onto the table on the back patio.

The faint scent of saltwater from the sea mixes with the cool evening air, and the setting sun casts a warm golden glow on everything around you. He moves with practiced ease, placing everything in its place.

You pull your legs from the chair and sit up, stretching as you glance back into the house. Phone left over the table, still displaying the article you found about your ‘escapade’. You hadn’t realized how much time had passed. Inside, the lights are all on, and the shadows of indistinguishable figures move about the kitchen, the soft clatter of utensils filtering through the open window.

“Are they already making dinner? Sorry, you need help?”

The Monegasque stops you with a swift gesture of his hand, starting to place everything on the table by himself. His hair is damp and unruly from his recent shower, the blue shirt he's wearing showing traces of the droplets that must have been falling just minutes ago. He looks so effortlessly nice.

“Don’t worry, Carlos’ mom warned us not to bother you”

“Is that so?” you chuckle softly, a hint of relief creeping in. But you don’t stop yourself from reaching for the forks and knives, setting them in their places on the table —seven seats in total. Carlos’ sister and her husband are joining you tonight. "You should’ve told me anyway..."

"I don’t think she’d let you help even if you wanted to. She even sent the cook home for the night" he calms you, finishing his task and resting his arms on the backrest of the seat opposite to you

“What is she making?”

Charles hesitates, his gaze darting back to the kitchen before turning to you again. His mouth opens and closes with stray syllables that don’t really make any dish you have ever heard before. “Some kind of fish, I think? They’ve said the name a couple times but I didn't get it” he shrugs lightly, but there’s a gentle smile on his lips. "It smells good though. That’s all I can say"

“It does smell nice” you give him, a grin of your own pulling at your lips. You sit down again as ordered, taking your still light up phone from the table and turning off the screen.

She should respect herself is the last thing you manage to read on it, one of the nicest comment of the hundreds hanging on the comment section of the page. You sigh. The sound of the waves crashing against the rocks a few meters away filling in the silence that falls right after.

“Try not to worry about it too much, okay?” he almost whispers, his hand moves through his hair, shaking it out of place “I know it’s hard, but... some people are just assholes, no use in reading the shit they put out there”

A sigh slips from your lips as you lean your elbows over the glass table and glance away, the weight of your thoughts pressing on your chest. "A lot has come up about Monaco too..."

While you can hardly stomach the repulsive comments surrounding the supposed relationship between you Charles, or Carlos, or both of them? Some even asking themselves how your closeness with Lewis might fit into the mix. The constant invasion of privacy, the sense that you’re being watched every second of every day, has been weighting on you lately.

They know where you've been. Where you ate. What you wore. They even managed to snap a picture of that tiny clay hedgehog Charles bought you back at the artisan market —a detail so small, yet so personal, and now it’s making the rounds in social media. It’s all out there now, for anyone to dissect, to judge, to speculate.

One thing is people knowing your hotel back in the middle of a Grand Prix, and another thing entirely is being followed back to Charles’ building entrance. There’s even photos of you carrying the suitcase inside the Sainz’s villa just couple days ago.

The thought of going back to Monaco after this trip to Mallorca feels suffocating. You’re not sure if you can face it. Not after everything. You feel so exposed, like there’s nowhere safe anymore.

Charles’s voice cuts through your spiraling thoughts. "No, I don’t even look at those things anymore," he confesses, the finality in his voice talking of a decision he took long ago. The driver has spent years on the spotlight, for good a not so much "Look, I know we talked about this before, but I really don’t care what anyone says."

His words linger in the quite night, his eyes never leaving yours. "I enjoy this. Being here, with you. Spending more time together outside of racing and being normal, you know?" His smile softens, but there's something deeper in his expression, something you can’t quite put your finger on. "And I loved showing you around Monaco, having you at home. So really, why would I care about what some loser has to say about it? This... this is just me and you. Us."

Oh, that’s...

What?

A rush of warmth blooms across your cheeks, spreading like wildfire through your chest, leaving you breathless for a moment. Your heart flutters, faster than it should, that’s so nice, so comforting in a way you didn’t expect. And the way he’s looking at you, the intensity in his gaze expressing a million things more than he can manage to put into words.

But where is all this coming from? He’s never said anything remotely close to this before. Sure, he’s talked about how great it was spending time with you, how much fun the last few days were, but this?

“I...” you stammer, the word barely a whisper as your mind struggles to catch up. You look up at him, heart racing and nerves threatening to unravel you entirely. What are you even supposed to say? His words, his tone, the way his eyes seem to search yours with such quiet urgency. It all feels so much deeper than just this conversation “I had a lot of fun too, Charles”

As soon as the words slip from your lips, you realize with a sinking feeling that you’ve said the wrong thing. The change in the air is almost tangible, as if the moment itself has shifted, taking on a new weight you can’t shake off. Charles’s smile is still there, but it’s different now. It’s more distant, reserved.

You open your mouth instinctively, your mind scrambling for something to say, something to undo the sudden tension. But the words don’t come. They’re caught somewhere, stuck behind the pressure building inside you.

But nothing comes. The words stay lodged in your throat, swallowed by hesitation, and all you can do is watch as he turns and walks away.

“Toma, dale a la cría más jamón, hombre (Here, give the girl some more jamón, boy)” Carlos Senior voice breaks through the chatter, abrupt yet kindly, leaning over the table to take one of the dishes of cut meat scattered around the table and giving it to his son.

You try to wave it off, an awkward smile tugging at your lips. “Oh, no, no, por favor,” you stammer, already chewing on a bite of the rich, salty meat. But before you can protest further, Carlos takes the plate from his father’s hand and places it in front of you. A bit of heat rises to your cheeks, “Sorry, it’s been a while since I last got to eat it and-”

“No, love, eat some more! There’s cheese here as well, do you want some?” Reyes, Carlos’ mother, swiftly diverts the talk, not waiting for an answer before picking another one of the dishes and sending it down the table towards you.

“Tendríamos pedir más y así se llevan los chicos (We should buy some more, so the kids can take them home)” she suggests to her husband, taking her glass in one hand and turning to the other guest at the table “Charles, do you like it too? And the cheese? We’ll prepare some for you to take back”

You laugh under your breath, trying not to look overwhelmed. The plates seem to multiply around you, the family circling you both in a flurry of food. You catch Charles’ eye across the table, his dimples flashing in an innocent smile. He’s probably not understanding half of the conversation, the rapid-fire Spanish swirling around him too much to keep up with.

Your mind drifts briefly to Nick, he's definitely not going to be happy about this. From the delicate codfish Reyes had spent hours preparing, to the fragrant cake Carlos' sister brought over, you’ve already eaten more than you intended. This time you’re truly not sure if you’ll fit on the car.

Well, the trainer had actually seemed quite willing to ease up on the strictness of the diet when you brought up your conversation with Daniel a few weeks ago. He even programmed a new plan just a couple of days later. For some reason and despite their differences, Nick was oddly pleased that Daniel had discussed the topic with you, even admitted he wasn’t really comfortable with such a rigid calorie count either.

So then, why was it programmed in the first place?

“Where are you taking them tomorrow?” Carlos' sister leans forward, finishing her piece of cheese as she watches the scene unfold around them, her eyes scanning the quiet evening.

“We were going to Palma, to see the market, but now that they know we’re all here...” her brother reclines lazily on the chair, a sigh flowing out his lips “I don’t know, maybe take a trip to Menorca?”

Carlos glances over at you and Charles, his eyes scanning for a response. You nod encouragingly, the idea appealing. It'll throw the paparazzies off for a while, the island not that far from you, but enough to be off the radar for a bit.

His father also supports the idea, instantly taking out his phone to show Carlos a restaurant they visited a few years back as a suggestion for lunch “Your mother loved this one, it had a terrace over the sea and all. And there was this plate of roasted lamb...”

Carlos and his sister both chuckle at the enthusiasm in the man’s voice, exchanging a look with their mother. It’s probably not the first time they’ve heard this story, and judging by the way their father dives into every single detail of it —even in English—, the last time won’t be anytime soon either.

The conversation drifts to other places worth visiting before they leave the island. The family has had this house for years, and while they know Mallorca like the back of their hands, they’ve explored the other islands multiple times as well.

After a while, Carlos’ hand fall onto your knee to gain your attention “Like the plan?”

“Menorca? Yeah, at least for tomorrow” you whisper back, your eyes meeting his. They’re the ones who know how to navigate the chaos of fame, so you better follow along with their advice.

The Ferrari driver nods, his hand giving your knee a reassuring squeeze before leaving it to rest there, calm and steady. The warmth of his touch lingers as the evening stretches on. Yeah, he’s getting too smooth at it, you think —but you don’t mind.

_____

Turns out the Sainz family has an excellent taste, from the restaurants they recommend to the activities Carlos is roped into taking you on. Menorca, it turns out, is even more enchanting than the glossy postcards or travel blogs ever hinted at, with its tranquil waters and the shimmering sun. You spend most of the trip in a blissful haze, thankfully managing to avoid too many encounters with paparazzi or curious fans.

That conversation with Charles from the first evening? It’s not mentioned again, by either of you. The air between you settling back into that familiarity slowly but surely. Still, it lingers in the back of your mind, and you make a mental note to talk things through with him once you’re away from all of this.

The days on the islands vanish like grains of sand through your fingers, blurring into an endless string of sunsets and laughter. You try to memorize every detail —the way the sunlight catches on Carlos’ grin, the sound of Charles’ rare and genuine laugh, the warm feeling being with them bring you. But no matter how tightly you cling, the end still comes.

Your escapade to the Balearic Islands has come to an end, and now you’re heading to Monaco for the last couple of days you’ll get to spend with Charles.

When the time to finally part ways at the airport comes, Carlos holds you tightly. His hug is firm, his arms wrapping around you as if they alone could keep you from leaving. He sways you gently from side to side, reluctant to let go.

“So, you’re coming back every break, aren’t you?” his words, though light, strike a chord deep in your chest.

You want to respond, to reassure him, but the truth lodges in your throat. Because this, whatever it is, probably won’t happen ever again. You won’t get to spend your holidays with the two drivers, won’t be able to talk to them again, to see them, to hug them. This dream, or whatever this temporarily insanity of yours is, will come to an end at some point. Right?

But even as you nod and give him a wry smile, the question haunts you: do you want it to end?

The thought keeps circling your mind over the following days and weeks, as you try to convince yourself of the only sane solution. You have to go back, to your apartment, to your work, to your life –How? You’ll have to figure that one out too. Nevertheless, this feeling reaches its breaking two weeks later, at the afterparty of the Belgian Grand Prix, cradled in his arms once again, this time under the crisp chill of his victory night as you lose yourself in his eyes.

Do you really want this to end?

“Thanks again for coming,” Carlos murmurs, looking down at you in a hug that you both refuse parting from. “I know you’ve been a little anxious about parties and going out lately”

You lean back slightly to look at him, the warmth of his presence anchoring you “I couldn’t miss it.”

“Who knows when I’ll win again, right?” he teases, a sly smile playing on his lips.

“Oh, shut it!” you laugh, swatting his chest. The sound of your voice bounces off the quiet entrance, and for a moment, the world narrows to just the two of you.

“What? You’re the one who said it first!”

“Me?! When?” your incredulous glare only makes his grin wider “It’s you who heard that, always thinking the worst of me”

“If that helps you sleep at night”

You push at him in mock indignation, stepping back from the hug to create some distance, but your heel catches on the uneven ground. The world tilts alarmingly, but before gravity can do its worst, his hands are there—firm and steady—gripping your waist and pulling you back upright in one seamless motion “Nope, we’re not having none of that tonight”

“What? can’t a woman fall down with dignity now?” you spurt back, regaining your footing. Your feet hurt with these heels, you thought rich people parties were supposed to be more of sitting down fun, some wine and expensive food. Instead got that undanceable music

“With dignity?” he chuckles, low and warm, letting you adjust yourself but keeping his hold on you. You don’t know if it's in fear you’ll fall again or simply a need to keep you close “Someone just had a little too many daquiris”

You look at him then, big eyes on display and your lower lip pushed out, like a child caught red-handed and whine “They were so good, Carlos, so sweet!”

“I knew you’d like then,” Carlos’ smirk softens, glad you enjoyed the drink he recommended “When I tried the cherry one, I immediately thought of you.”

“Oh, that’s why it tasted like a lollypop!” The revelation feels groundbreaking in your slightly woozy state. His sweets words somehow flying pass you. You point at him accusingly then, wobbling a bit in your heels. “But don’t change the topic, I’m not drunk no more, I swear!”

“No? You’re not?”

“Perfectly fine now. Just the heels, I promise” you nod, you haven’t drink that much and he know it. He is just teasing “I’m, like, tipsy. Fun tipsy.”

“Fun tipsy, you say?” Carlos repeats in a chuckle, voice almost a whisper, and his gaze lingers. The noise of the party behind you fades to a distant hum. He looks at you, really looks at you, and something in his expression makes your chest tighten and your stomach flip in equal measure.

You don’t notice when his hands begin to slide, one moving up from your waist to rest just below your neck. His thumb brushes along your jawline, tentative but deliberate. The gentle warmth of his palm against your cheek is intoxicating, and before you know it, you’re leaning into the touch, your body betraying you.

“Then...” the man’s eyes glimmer, catching the golden glow of the patio lights. His voice is laced with hesitance, searching yours for a question he suddenly feels too shy to ask “Would it be okay if I kissed you?”

The question lingers between you, heavy with meaning. For a moment, all you can do is nod, barely aware of the small, trembling movement. The distance between you vanishes as he leans in, his hand cradling your cheek with a gentleness that makes your breath hitch.

When Carlos’ lips finally meet yours, it’s like the world stops spinning. The first touch is soft, testing, as though he’s afraid to break the moment. You respond almost instinctively, leaning into him, and that’s all the encouragement he needs. The kiss deepens, his lips pressing against yours with a growing confidence.

His other hand finds its way back to your waist, anchoring you to him, steady and unyielding. Your hand clutching his shirt while the other drifts up to his shoulder. The warmth of him seeps into your fingertips, your skin, until you feel like you might melt into him entirely.

Your heart pounds wildly in your chest, the sound almost deafening in your ears. His fingers graze along your jawline, tracing a path as if trying to memorize every inch of you in this fleeting moment. You’re hyper-aware of everything —his touch, the way his breath mingles with yours, the slight tug of his lips as he smiles into the kiss.

When he pulls away, it’s agonizingly slow, his lips lingering against yours as if reluctant to part. His forehead comes to rest lightly against yours.

“That was really nice” Carlos murmurs, his voice hushed, almost reverent.

“Yeah, it was” you agree, your voice barely a whisper. You lean back, looking up at him with a smile that betrays the fluttering in your chest and can’t help but chuckle “A bit unexpected maybe, but—”

"Unexpected?" he asks with a relaxed laugh, his fingers drawing invisible circles on your waist, his touch light but steady. "You can’t even imagine how long I’ve wanted to do that."

Before you can respond, he leans in for a quick, soft kiss, his lips brushing yours one last time, lingering just long enough to leave you wanting more.

“Like two hours?” you guess, playfully, as you play with the buttons of his dark shirt, and he shakes his head in denial

The sound of a car approaching cuts through the moment—the unmistakable hum of your Uber arriving. Carlos glances over his shoulder at the car, then back at you, his expression softening “Guess it’s time for you to go, I’ll tell you about it another day”

The Ferrari driver pulls back and reaches for your hand, guiding you down the stairs and toward the car. You pause at the door, feeling a little reluctant to part ways, but before you can say anything, Carlos steps close again. His hand slides to your waist, pulling you in for a brief but sweet kiss, one that leaves you with a small smile on your lips.

"Send me a message when you get there, alright?" he murmurs, his lips still close to yours.

"Yeah, I will," you reply, a little breathless, before stepping back and getting into the car.

"Goodnight, Carlos"

“Buenas noches, cielo”

Author's note: Thank you all so much for reading, any kind of interaction is greatly appreciated! I know it's been way too long

Taglist: @purplephantomwolf @raye2000 @yuiiimd @drezzerk33 @leclercdream @homie0sapien @minkyungseokie @carlossainzwho @rewmuslupin @kyuupidwrites @raevyng @lazybot @gills-lounge @hiraethrhapsody @jjkclub @darleneslane @therealcap @aespie

#carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #f1 x reader #f1 fic #f1 x you #formula one x reader #formula one x you

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tuliptic · 1 year ago

Text

What Is My Purpose Here On This Land

This is for all, but especially for those with existential crises. We’ve wondered what we are meant to do, do we have a purpose being on this planet, and many more questions continue to feed our brains.

Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question: What messages does your weary heart need to hear? Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Pile 1 - Pile 2

Pile 3 - Pile 4

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Linestrider Tarot Deck, Flower Petals Oracle Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.

Pile 1: The Rose

A card to represent you: The Chariot

One funny thing when I was shuffling this deck was that this card came out tumbling. It was like.. Upright, reverse, upright again. I’m taking this as a sign. You like taking the wheel. You’ve been through the ups and downs as you journey ahead, sometimes lacking direction, learning self-discipline throughout the process, learning the importance of strength and will, finding balance, and driving to where you are right now. There’s this determination that you’ve gained from past experience, and you’re still driving ahead. A word of advice is to be aware of your own focus level, and to take a rest when you’re tired. The journey of life ahead is long, and it’s always alright to take a break now and then. For some reason, I also feel some of you may be travelling right now, or intend to travel in the future. Make sure to prepare a proper itinerary and have emergency numbers saved!

1. What is my role here on earth? - The High Priestess

First word I’m picking up is healing. You’re the person who answers to the cries of help, being the Universe’s hands in providing aid to those who pray for it, to be that gentle beauty without losing your thorns. You’re called to be the healing energy, to be the kindness that people need but may or may not deserve. Not to put a burden on you, but you probably tend to be kind and subconsciously heal or watch over those who need your help, even strangers, and even people who do not deserve those kindness. (There’s this nagging behind my head that reminds me of the people in Gotham who did nothing yet yells for help/salvation, instead of fighting and protecting their “loved” ones.)

2. Have I achieved it? - The Fool

You’re only starting on this journey. Or maybe have yet to start on this journey. You probably realised this uhhh ability of yours very recently, or have only decided to really start doing something on it. See, realising this ability/skill doesn’t mean you have to do something about it. You may realise your skill for art but not continue cultivating that skill. It’s the same. You’ve probably stopped all those questions and try to take out that first step to do it. You’re killing your doubt step by step, betting in yourself and trusting in yourself to do something entirely new. (Yes, ITZY’s Bet On Me is playing as I write this.)

3. How to achieve it? - The Sun

There are so many things embodied in this card: brightness, hope, ray of hope, and more to come. What I’m feeling from this is mainly warmth, asking you to just be this Sun, to shine just as you are. It’s gonna sound weird but imagine healing rays? I’m cringing and having a weird face as I type this out. But yeah, just be who you are, to continue doing what you do. Just know that your presence is like a walking energy-purifier, lifting up the spirits even by smiling to strangers or wishing them a good day. You can attempt to try doing something else, for example, being more active in volunteer work in nursing homes and shelters, playing a part in activist activities, or even taking up counselling courses to help people out. These are only some of the many ways that are available. Most importantly is that you do kindness with kindness, not to have any ulterior motives behind them.

4. Why do I need to do it? - Seven of Wands rx

The world is changing, more and more people are experiencing a feeling of defeat and overwhelmingness, including you. All are called to make a change, and this is your part in the pledge to make a change. We have arrived at a time of change, and actions need to be taken. People have been fighting among themselves, you may even have been having conflicting thoughts and contradicting beliefs. Peace has been taken away, and instead of fighting to get back that same peace, it’s time to recreate a new peace that will work for this new world. A new structure is needed, and you’re one of those first few people who are tasked to build things anew again.

5. What can I learn from it? - King of Pentacles rx

What you’ll be learning is not only based on what you’ve experienced, but from what you’ve observed. You saw the fall of those who have been obsessed with earthly riches, those who have been paying attention to the materialistic realm, and have forgotten to nourish their soul and mental energy. The downfall was harsh and painful, reminding you that balance is needed in every aspect. From there, you’re gonna continue spreading kindness, letting the scars of the past be a reminder of what has happened, and how you’re gonna redirect the course of your energy.

6. How am I supposed to transform from it? - Knight of Pentacles rx

Self-discipline will take you to a lot of places, and will also be able to take you to places that you thought you never would’ve reached. This gift of yours, this purpose of your is not to let you be more spiritual, but to be more down to earth. You’re supposed to be the bridge between the spiritual themes with the practical, existing world we’re living in right now. From this, you’ll also be able to get connected to your roots, your family, your ancestry, even get connected to your race. I hope I do not get into trouble with how I phrase myself here hshshs. But y’know how colonialism has affected a lot of things, like religion and even language. I don’t quite remember where I heard it, but Tagalog or Filipino, languages of the Philippines, have Spanish influence in it. Or how Christianity kinda replaced the other folk religions with how it’s being brought in. So yeah, you’ll need to do the dissection to find out which was the original, which you wanna connect with. You define your own roots, and you take charge of it.

7. What is the self-fulfilment level? - The Tower

Whilst you dream, you clear your mind of all negativity and your spirit will be refreshed. With that, you’ll charge ahead, doing everything you can until you feel that you’ve changed the world. It sounds really idealistic, but if you need to remember the catastrophic energy that The Tower brings. The change is not gonna be small, and you can’t do it alone. You’ll work ahead, without knowing how long it’ll take. You then make friends on the way, working towards the same goal but with different tasks, slowly but steadily paving and painting a new path. Just like the straw that breaks the camel’s back, your tiniest effort shatters the restrictive and unhelpful rules that were oppressing the people. That’s what you’re meant to be, that’s what you can achieve. But I need to remind you that this self-fulfilment level differs for everyone. One can feel content by doing small things, while some want the satisfaction that comes with doing great things. They are all valid and powerful acts in their own ways, and no one can deny the effort and effect that comes with it.

Overall energy: The Fool, Ace of Pentacles

Overall, you’re called to take actions to start a new chapter of your life. You’re the main character of your own story, you’re the one who decides how you want to paint your journey. However, whatever that you’re intending to do, remember to not do it alone. A solo trip is fun, but a journey? It’s best to have people joining your cause to support each other. Remember that there are other animals in The Fool, cuz one is a guide and the other is a guard/support. The energy of rebirth and transformation comes heavily in this pile, and sometimes, it can destroy you in the process. Proceed with caution and with faith. We are praying for you as you travel.

Pile 2: The Mirror

A card to represent you: The Sun

You attempt to be a person to bring warmth to people around you. The Sun shines warm lights, and that’s something you enjoy as well. But sometimes, when anger gets hold of you, you tend to burn people around you, accidentally or on purpose. You don’t really use the reason “I didn’t mean to”, because if you injure people, you totally mean it. It’s probably due to them crossing your boundaries repeatedly, and you didn’t want to hold back any longer. But still, the card wants to remind you of who you wanted to be. Do not let anger cloud the true you. Let out that anger at the right person, and go back to who you are, the warm and accepting you.

1. What is my role here on earth? - Judgement rx

I don’t really wanna use the word here but you’re called to learn the karmic lessons in the past, may it be the current past or your past lives. There are times that you hold on to your values, yet the world continues to challenge you, which may have made you question what is the meaning of you being here, what do you need to do to get out of this cycle of unfairness. Instead of fighting it, it’s time for you to discard the mask of pride that you’ve been wearing, and accept that unfairness is a part of life that you need to go through. Once there's acceptance, you can build a new structure (structure on how you go through problems, or building up new values or habits, or anything else that can help you). Humility is what you need. And stay away from humiliation. These are two very different things. People taking credit over what you do is… Something you need to be aware of. But. If there are people out there who take credit over what you do yet accuse you of copying or shit like that? Fight.

2. Have I achieved it? - Seven of Pentacles

This is something that will take long to achieve it, but you’re still on the way. You probably have noticed this… Thing? That things have been unfair and that it is too tiring to live, and you’re somehow somewhat struggling through life. Sure, there are times that are fun, but you know that fun does not last long and once it’s time, you continue crashing the waves and pressure life gives you. You feel like you’ve been doing this forever, and things just don’t seem that they are turning better. Have faith that it will. Belief is a skill that comes with birth, you just need to hold on to it, believing that things will resolve in the end. Which it will. The struggles will become lighter eventually, because hard work and effort pays off.

3. How to achieve it? - The Magician rx

There are some other untapped talents in you, and it’s time for you to unlock them. You need to be able to find them and develop them. It’s not something you can easily access to, but it’s something you’ll need to practise and to get good at, and then to use them wisely. This untapped skill of yours may be something spiritually related, with you standing in between humanity and spirituality. You need to be aware to not fall into people’s traps, and to make sure that you do not manipulate others in the process. I feel that this pile may have some talents or skills in manipulation and deception (either you’re aware or not), but you can choose to not do so. Remember, if you choose to do so, there will be more things that you’ll lose. The Magician talks about alchemy, where you use one thing to exchange for another of equal value.

4. Why do I need to do it? - Nine of Wands

There’s a resilience that you need to learn, encouraging you to pay attention to your rights, believe in yourself and defend your position or property. It is time to gather your experiences and life lessons, to reflect on what life has shown you. There’s this hint of spirituality that you’re also called to evaluate - to see what it has to offer in your life, to see how you can use this to make it another life lesson/asset of yours. You need to remember that the process of learning can be difficult and challenging, but you can also make it fun, make it lighter. Unlike in school, where you learn without passion (for most people), you are now learning new things because you’re interested in it. So yeah, learn through playing and experimenting, celebrate each growth and resilience you’ve unlocked. I hope I’m making sense here.

5. What can I learn from it? - Four of Cups

I doubt that many who pick this pile are happy with meditation, but this is one thing you’ll be learning. There’s a need to reevaluate yourself, and realigning values within you. I’m having some difficulties in forming my words, because it feels like your pile already knows about this, but in some sense, refuse to do this, refuse to acknowledge this. You’ve probably heard a lot of this kinda talk, where you need to do this and that to achieve that enlightenment. You really didn’t like that, and you still don’t like it. Yet, this is needed. You need to go through a long while of silence, a time of reflection, to make changes and to be reborn again. It’s difficult, you may cry again and again, because you’ve been in darkness for so long, slowly giving up on whatever ways are out there. Know that it can’t be any darker than this, and it’s also a chance for you to recognise light, and to embrace that light.

6. How am I supposed to transform from it? - Five of Cups rx

You have to accept pain has been crucial in your growth, and walk away from it. It’s time for you to move on, and you’ll find yourself to be more… Accepting? Acceptance is a huge theme in your reading, where you acknowledge that this has happened, and you accept it, and then move on with life. As long as you accept something has happened, that weight will be slowly lifted away from your shoulders. You won’t be able to move when you’ve been crushed by all those unhappiness (or even happiness) that you’ve been holding onto. Focus on wholeness, learn how to take things up and put them down, continue on with the journey of letting go.

7. What is the self-fulfilment level? - The Hierophant

The Hierophant is often related to religion, and it being paired with spirituality speaks even more so. I’m not saying that achieving enlightenment (don’t mistake it with the Buddhist term, please) IS fulfilling for you, but it is one step to achieve what you wanted - release. Life’s burdens have been pulling this pile down, and what you want the most is release, release from responsibilities; release from fears; release from expectations; release from this endless cycle that has been trapping you. You’ll need to invite in a new thought to be released from what has been tying you down, and it’s time for you to be reborn again.

Overall energy: The Lovers, Eight of Cups

There are times where you need to make decisions between two choices that were offered to you. Oftentimes, you want to pick neither, but life decides it for you anyways. Either paths will lead you to where you’re meant to go, so why not stand still for now and listen to your life? Looking at it may be distracting, as there are a lot of worries and neon lights around. Make a cup of drink, sit down, put on your earphones and play some soft music. You might be able to hear something. One thing I have to mention is that there’s a heavy Pluto and karmic energy I’m sensing from here. It’s like… A huge circle, a cycle, where things happen again and again. You’ll need time (and a lot of time) to complete this cycle, only then you can break free from there. Some may feel dejected, but do remember that every step you’re taking right now is bringing you closer to the end. The Mirror is also here for you to reflect, to see who you are, and to see who you are Inside. Make this promise that you’ll be kind to yourself, appreciate each step that you’re taking and celebrate the small wins.

Pile 3: The Key

A card to represent you: The World

This pile is giving me a very comforting and secured energy. Paired with this card, those who picked this pile may have completed a project, or have achieved one of their goals in life, or are close to closing an existing project with success. You may also be one of the fixed signs (Aquarius, Taurus, Leo, Scorpio) or have them in your personal planets. Another thing I’m picking up is that some of you may be looking out for new projects to start when you haven’t reached the end of the current project. Take a step back, do not rush into things quickly. Sure, an end speaks of a new beginning, but you need time to plan a proper project and to recuperate from the exhaustion of the previous project.

1. What is my role here on earth? - Three of Swords rx

I’m seeing more of a guide here. You have been through difficulties in life, and from those, you’ve gained experiences, insights, knowledge and wisdom. With that, you’re tasked to guide the rest who are going through a hard time this round. It’s difficult because kindness isn’t something everyone is equipped with, and for you, especially, you may find it a lil bitter. This is where you challenge yourself to step outside of your comfort zone, to try something that you’ve never thought of, or even detest. But you gotta do it as the path you step on is the road to growth and illumination.

2. Have I achieved it? - Knight of Wands

You're charging towards it, albeit a lil reckless. You do have the passion in it, and you’re more than willing to be the change, even wishing that the change is something that can change the world. You can’t wait to experience the storm and thunder, wanting to feel the same scale of impact. However, you need to remember that passion can dissipate quickly, like how it started. There might be transits in your life, maybe Mars is transiting one of your personal planets right now, which gives you that impulse of wanting to achieve something. You are in control of your response, but the actions of other people and events are not. Do not be dejected when people reject you, but continue ahead without that recklessness.

3. How to achieve it? - Ten of Swords

You will be able to achieve it by going through defeats. You’re one who learns through actual defeats, the pain, remembering the falls of life through your body and soul. From there, only then you can compile those you’ve learnt and observed into a book, for your own and other’s references. At this phase, you may feel pulled between one path or another, and pushed to make a decision. It can be quite tense, but don’t avoid it. These tense situations build your strength, getting you ready to fly. Do not bend; do not submit defeat, continue ahead to chase after your ideals. Let that resolution and will to be your light.

4. Why do I need to do it? - Two of Wands rx

There’s a fear in you, not knowing what you are meant to achieve. This could be a personal goal for you to focus throughout your lifetime, building yourself up, giving you an unnamed courage to find your inner power. I feel that you may have subconsciously (or maybe consciously) compared yourself to people around you, wondering where in life you are, what you’re meant to do. To counter that, you need to set a personal goal, to have some sort of inner alignment, and figure out what you want to achieve. Do you want to appear as a confidant people turn to? Are you keen on sharing thoughts and experiences to make people’s lives a lil bit easier? Try taking a notebook and writing your goals down, and see what you need to do, or what you should stop doing to achieve that. It’s time that you activate a certain switch in you to be that fire (either to warm or to destroy. It’s up to you).

5. What can I learn from it? - The Hierophant, Ace of Pentacles

I feel that you may be even able to start something, maybe a support group or a club, especially in a religious context. There’s some form of finances involved in it, so yeah, maybe a support group where you guide others, and others guide the others, and let the leaves of the tree expand. Finances will be involved in terms that there are donations coming in, which you may use to assist those who are financially needy. You’ll be able to accept this new side of yours, and be more willing to reach out your hands because you could physically see how this chain of kindness continues on, holding on more hope that things can actually change for the better.

6. How am I supposed to transform from it? - Judgement

It is time for you to reevaluate your life, what meanings you want to fix to your life. There may be a calling to change your life or open your heart to new possibilities, to new responsibilities or a new field of work. The horn in this card symbolises that there may be a wake-up call from the world around you, telling you that it’s time to stop being in your head, to see the world for who it is, and how you’re supposed to make changes, or answer to those changes. Change can refer to something tangible and immediate, or the whole way one sees life. In fact, you may have already changed without realising it.

7. What is the self-fulfilment level? - Five of Cups rx

There’s a release from pain and suffering. The pain and suffering does not necessarily mean something physical, but something that’s more on a spiritual level. Y’know how sometimes one can feel… Empty and blank? That. That is actually suffering on a spiritual level, because you have no direction, no guidance, and sometimes that could feel suffocating. Some out there could just go along with life even though they have no idea what to do, and it’s cuz their direction of life is to go along with what the journey has to offer. What you’re doing right now is just standing there and looking blankly to where your eyes are looking, which increases the weight in your chest and legs. Through this, you’ll be able to find a proper direction and the awakening that comes with it will elevate you. Walking again after you’ve been standing so long will be uncomfortable at first, but take small and steady steps. You’ll find yourself running again soon.

Overall energy: The Star, Four of Swords

This reading talks about hope and rest, and how they come hand in hand. I felt a weight on my chest as I was typing the self-fulfilment part, because of how heavy the desperation and feeling of loss is. Know that The Star is shining a gentle ray of hope, consoling you that things will be better. The Star may not be visible all the time, especially in the daylight. But know that she is always there, and you can hear her whispers in the night, when you think you’re about to fall. Be kind to yourself and share your beauty as well as knowledge with those around you. But remember to take rests as well. You can’t afford to do much when you’re having a burnout. It’s alright to fall, but remember to rest and stand up again. Your passion is your greatest drive, go for it.

Pile 4: The Word

A card to represent you: The Magician rx

I feel like you’re currently standing in the middle of two different things, two very different and distinct fields (like science vs arts, realism vs spirituality), not knowing where to head to. There’s some sort of pull from both of them and you’re feeling very, very torn. However, remember that the Magician is someone that has a lot of skills, and has been acting as the bridge between the physical plane and the spiritual realm for a long time. You, also, have the skills to bridge between the various fields/things that are scattered across. As the bridge, you can see the connecting and overlapping points, and you can build out from there. You honour differences and expand.

1. What is my role here on earth? - Two of Swords rx

Your role is to take out the blinds that were covering the people’s eyes, including yours. You are called to stop them from hiding or shying away from the truth, making them see what is the truth, calling them to face reality. For some reason, I feel that you may have not been very liked at home due to this nature. Your parents may think that their reputation or status as parents should not be challenged, but you couldn’t care less about it. What you cared about was that justice and truth be upheld, and you won’t hesitate to rip anyone apart if they tried saying otherwise. This, in turn, has created quite a huge confrontation when you were growing up. But are you stopping there? No. You will continue your role of wake up call, but only once or twice. You’ve understood that there are always people out there who want to run away from the truth, and you’re not gonna waste your effort and time on them.

2. Have I achieved it? - The Chariot rx

You’re currently in a fallback. You took a step back to look at the options available and to reevaluate the situation. You realise that you were having a narrow goal and vision tunnel, which will cost a lot of meaningless sacrifice. You may have thought that it was okay to let your horses run without holding the reins, but now is not the time. You’re now evaluating and weighing the pros and cons, which are the items that you want to invest your time and energy on, finding out where your passion lies. A word of advice: Do not be afraid to try multiple things. Nothing is fixed in stone. Just like you may discover a new favourite dish later, you may also discover a new skill that is useful.

3. How to achieve it? - Page of Cups rx

First of all, you need to kill your doubts and fears. Fear is one main thing that’s stopping you from trying new things in different fields. There are always new things out there waiting for you to try, there are new opportunities that can’t wait to come to you. Being protective of your own energy is important, but you need to get out at times, to talk to people, to learn their ideas and train of thoughts, to see things from their point of view. This way, instead of tearing down the blinds covering their eyes, you’ll be able to verbally convince them to take the blinds down themselves, which is a much gentler way. Be honest and true, even to your fears. Accept them, and they might reward you with something special.

4. Why do I need to do it? - The Fool rx, Knight of Pentacles

I’m seeing some form of heavy responsibility here. You are not tasked to enjoy or to have fun, but to be like a defender, a protector, even a fighter or truth. Unlike The Fool, who goes on new journeys having fun, you are stationed at a place, guarding the gates, making sure those who enter are those who have earned it. This responsibility is not randomly placed on people, but it chooses those who vow to bear witness to the truth. Obligation is a word that’s also relevant here, where you’re also willing to bear this duty. Not sure if you’re doing this because you want the truth to be known or you just wanna spite people by forcing them to look at their wounds. It’s all up to you.

5. What can I learn from it? - Page of Wands

It’s like… A stone egg hatching. You thought that it was a stone, from its rough and hard exterior. But in reality, it’s actually a dragon egg. You learn that miracles happen in various forms, and that one really needs to think of the various possibilities and potentials you hold, even the ones that sound impossible. It’s alright to fail, it’s alright to fall, as long as you continue to climb up and attempt, you’ll be able to see the glory that’s arriving your way. Glory is a huge word but it is what it is. Stop losing focus and get that glory in your hands.

6. How am I supposed to transform from it? - Eight of Pentacles

You can transform into a gem by polishing and honing your skills. If I were to compare and describe, I’d say that you’re a jade as compared to other stones out there. It takes a skilled master to recognize the green under the hard and dusty exterior. Now, you’re that skilled master, and you’re gonna trim and polish the rock to reveal the gentle green in it. It can only be done little by little, and repeating the process until you see that gleam of green. And that’s what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna polish your skills day by day, night by night. Repetition of the task can sound mundane but that’s needed for you to be able to gain precision. This precision can be used in a lot of places, such as knowing the fine line of breaking the truth harshly or choosing to not say a single thing. Sometimes, people have their pride, and that precision will be able to help you to observe which line to cut, where to stop.

7. What is the self-fulfilment level? - Ten of Swords rx

Through this, I’d say that you’ll be able to let go of the past hurt that you have. There is a lot of anger and pain, especially when you recall how you were treated unfairly. You weren’t in the wrong, but you still get attacked. Now, you’ve learnt how to see things from their side and handle them properly, you’re now able to move on from that anger. It’s difficult, but at least, that chapter of your life is ending. You can close that book, and move on to the second book of your trilogy. Life’s a journey, make the rest of it worthwhile.

Overall energy: The Star, Seven of Cups (Strength hidden behind that keeps wanting to show up)

The Word in this picture is Love. Redirect that love to yourself, allow hope to shine on you, and accept that gleam of hope. Opportunities are coming, but you need to learn how to differentiate them from the illusions or wishful thinkings you’ve made. Fret not, you have the strength, the power to discern them according to your inner code of morale. You have what it takes, so practice courage each day. There’s a new you in the future that’s waiting for you. They seem eager, and prepared to take you onto a new journey, to see the new sceneries that come along with it.

Thank you for reading!

#tuliptic #🌷#pick a card #pick a pile #pick a picture #tarot reading #general tarot reading #i'm not sure how to feel about this tbh #it's very conflicting #so i guess it's prolly gonna resonate with a very specific group of people #do drop me asks if you need further clarification on them #i'll do my best to explain them to you #finally gonna get this out so i can focus on something else yeet

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crackedpumpkin · 3 months ago

Text

𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐌𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬 | 𝟎𝟳 |

[ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 ] | [ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ] | [ 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ]

“This isn’t what I meant when I said that we needed to talk.” You roll your eyes at Cole’s griping, though the fact that he hadn’t removed the earbud out of his ears tells you more than you need to know.

“Just shush for a moment and let me relax a little, okay?”

He lets you be, leaning back and letting his head relax on the brick wall behind him. After he’d suddenly dropped the whole bomb of needing to talk and all, he’d summoned Rocky and (dragged) brought you to the nearby rooftop.

Instead of actually talking about your feelings and thoughts, however, you’d pulled out your phone and earbuds, shoving one into his ear when he sat next to you and shushing him with a glare.

As the music plays, your racing heart starts to calm. Staring up at the sky, you watch the clear blue slowly fade into hues of pink and yellow, the colourful rays dancing together as if they were in an otherworldly waltz of their own.

“I’m still sorry, by the way.” You turn your head to see his closed eyes and tilted head back, exposing his Adam's apple. He speaks slowly, as if carefully choosing the right words in his mind to mould a cautious sentence. “The day we first met, Lloyd and I had just been mobbed earlier by a group of fans again, and I just wanted some quiet time to myself.”

Black irises meet yours, a shared stare filled with silent apology. “It’s fine,” you allow a slow smile onto your face. “I’d have reacted much worse if I were you. I’m sorry about hitting you though.”

He laughs, glancing down at his abdomen. “What, this old thing? Barely felt it. Maybe I’ve gotten used to your punches.” He chuckles when you shove him once more with a playful scowl, the air between you both settling into a much more relaxed mood.

He hesitates, allowing the song to play for a few more bars before deciding to broach the long-awaited topic. “So what’s got you so riled up about soulmates anyway? I mean, you made your dislike pretty clear, but I thought most people look forward to meeting theirs.”

“That’s exactly what makes it annoying.” An exasperated sigh falls from your lips, running a hand through your hair. “Just because I have a soulmate doesn’t mean I have to automatically like them, do I?”

He winces. “I didn’t think I was that bad…” He mumbles, looking down at his shoes and kicking away a small pebble.

“No, it’s not- I just…” A groan leaves you, eyes fixed back onto a passing cloud as you try to sort out the mess of thoughts all clumped together in your head. “It’s complicated, okay? It’s not you, it’s me.”

“Right,” he nods. “Can’t argue there.” He hides a weak grin when you shove him with an annoyed laugh, copying your posture and looking up at the clouds. “So why? Why all this?” He gestures aimlessly.

The answer’s hard to pinpoint, unable to conjure the right words to encapsulate the surge of emotion in your heart as it swells. The silence between you grows heavier with each passing second.

He notices your quiet struggle, and for a moment, the air between you both feels fragile. Breaking the silence, he speaks, his voice softer than usual. “I didn’t think I’d ever have a soulmate,” he admits, the rawness in his tone catching you off guard.

His gaze grows distant, barely focusing on the clouds in the sky. There’s a vulnerability in his eyes, one that mirrors your own uncertainty.

“After my mom died, I saw what losing her did to my dad. He was... broken. I never wanted to go through that kind of pain.” He pauses for a moment, gathering the courage to continue. “When I became a ninja, I thought I was untouchable. I had a purpose. I didn’t need anyone, least of all a soulmate.”

The weight of his words hangs in the air, and it hits you—his resistance, his fear, the walls he’s built. He takes another breath, a tremble in his words as he speaks. “I thought I didn’t need anyone then, and I’m still not sure I do now.”

His admission stirs something inside you, the unease morphing into something more complicated. You want to say something, anything, but the words seem stuck behind the unspoken tension that lingers between you both.

“Looks like we both don’t need soulmates then.”

Wow, I need to stop talking. Forever.

A flicker of surprise registers in his gaze as he processes your words. Shaking his head with a nervous laugh, a moment of silence passes between you both. Guilt starts to eat away at the edges of your conscience, mentally berating yourself for your response.

He stands up, his fingers brushing against the earbud before handing it back, hesitation flickering in his movement. You stare at his outstretched hand, taking a deep breath as the words rip themselves out of your throat, an unspoken secret you’ve never shared with anyone.

“My mom and dad got divorced when I was 15.” The instant relief you feel is startling, like a weight that had been dragging you under finally loosened its grip. For so long, it had gnawed at you, a parasitic leech feeding on your spirit.

Well, until now.

The sensation of a freshly opened wound is unnerving, raw and exposed to your soulmate who stands in front of you. He’s completely silent, which only adds to the growing nervousness that begins to spill over the jug holding everything inside.

Coughing, you snatch the earbud from his hand and roll up the wires in a hurry. Standing up, you refuse to meet his eyes. “So, where’s Rocky? I’m pretty tired, so I kinda have to get home now.”

Another moment passes before Rocky materialises behind you both. I guess he’s finished recharging his dragon, you think to yourself as it bends down, sensing you didn’t really want to talk with his owner for the time being.

The ride back home is quiet, though your arms had found themselves wrapped around his waist once more from fear of falling off. You’d allowed yourself a brief moment of resting your forehead against his shoulder for a moment, breathing in his cologne that calms your racing heart.

As the seconds pass, you can sense your raw wound slowly patching itself up, like a hastily plastered band-aid. It shouldn’t still ache like this, not after all these years. Yet, even now, the mere mention of your mom has a way of pulling at the fragile seams, threatening to tear them open all over again.

It’s like what your mom always said when you were younger. You’d always been an active and mischievous kid who constantly found herself in accidents. Every time you came running to her, she'd kneel down, her hands gentle but firm, tending to the wound. “Remember,” she’d say, “if you acknowledge it, you give it power. So ignore it, and it’ll go away.”

Back then, it worked. Chanting those words under your breath as she cleaned your wounds felt like a secret spell, something to cling to. But now? Now that you’re older, wiser, and have seen more than just playground accidents? It feels hollow. Because no matter how hard you try to ignore it, the pain still lingers.

Perhaps it’s the fact that you’re older now and more mature, but the phrase still stood strong. If you didn’t acknowledge the wound, then it wouldn’t hurt. If you didn’t acknowledge the fights behind closed doors, they didn’t happen. If you didn’t acknowledge the divorce, it wasn’t real.

But it is.

The thought makes you inhale shakily, choosing to press your forehead against his back, wanting nothing more than to burrow further into a deeper, darker hole within yourself. His back tenses slightly before relaxing, and you can sense his concerned gaze as he glances down at you before turning back to face the front.

He lets you remain there for the rest of the ride home, pretending not to notice your shaky breaths and occasional tightening of your arms around his waist. Opening your eyes, you spot the comic book store below, and it dawns on you that he’d taken the longer route back to your home.

Suddenly, breathing gets a little easier.

When Rocky finally lands, you’re back in your usual upright position. He lets you dismount first, then dematerializes his dragon, having learnt from the previous experience. You both head toward the building, his hands casually shoved into his pockets, and an odd sense of ease settling between you.

As you pause in front of the lift, you press the button, the soft glow of the floor numbers flickering in the reflection of the glass doors. "Thanks for today," you murmur, your voice quieter than intended but sincere. You catch his gaze in the reflection, his eyes meeting yours. The corners of his lips curve into a small, relieved smile.

“Maybe the next time we meet, it’ll be less awkward.” He jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“Yeah. Next time.” His words don’t go unappreciated, the warmth in your own voice surprising you. The lift arrives with a soft ding, and as you step inside, something makes you hesitate. You keep the doors from closing, holding the button down.

He’s already started to turn away, ready to head back. “Friends?” The word slips out, catching slightly in your throat. Extending the olive branch feels strange, but somehow necessary.

His body stiffens for a beat, caught off guard by the offer. Slowly, he turns back toward you, his expression shifting into a wide, genuine grin. “Friends,” he repeats, the relief in his voice matching your own.

As the doors close between you, you both share a nod of understanding, your expression mirroring his. The shared gaze filled with a sense of warmth and genuine trust doesn’t break, until the lift finally disappears from his view.

— — — — —

As the saying goes, when life gives you lemons, you strangle the bitch for doing so.

When it comes to Duolingo streaks at least.

“Español? More like espafar,” you mutter, pressing the home button rapidly when the screen shows your broken streak. You’d been 7 days strong into the Spanish course but forgot all about it until now.

The lift doors open, and Holly steps in with a grin. “Buenos dias!”

“Don’t even,” you groan, showing her the screen of the animated green bird shaking its head in disappointment. She raises her brows. “I just keep forgetting everything except for like, the simple phrases. Why is it even teaching me how to say ‘the bottle is big?’”

“Good point. I don’t think the topic of bottle sizes comes up in conversation often.” She agrees, stepping out of the lift when the doors open on the ground floor.

“We still gotta find a company to research,” you grumble, wincing as the bright sun decides to aim its rays directly at you. Alan - another of your professors who insisted you remove the Dr. from his name had assigned your class another project on top of the already existing ones from other classes.

“I’m basing mine off Papa’s Pizzeria,” she shrugs, narrowly avoiding a kid on his bicycle, the ringing of bells sounding through the bustling streets as they deliver newspapers from door to door. “His business model is crazy. He’s got like, what, four successful franchises?”

You sigh, the reminder of the cake you’d placed an order for just a single week away from being collected. The only reason why you’d even placed the order so early is because you knew you’d forget if you didn’t. Plus, if not for Cole’s presence, the earliest slot would’ve been months away.

“I haven’t decided mine yet,” you say, swinging your arms up in the air as you yawn, the effects of your morning americano already wearing off. Blinking sleepily, the bright lights of a building looming in the distance catch your eye.

Huh. You squint a little, reading the words off the top. Borg Industries.

“Is that a big company around here?” Holly blinks, glancing from you to the big neon signboard in the sky.

“You’re joking.”

The shrug you offer in return draws a snort of disbelief. “Borg Industries? The most innovative, cutting-edge tech alive? They make everything! Over two-thirds of the city uses Borg Industries products. What I would kill to sneak a look in their lab.”

“Someone’s a fan,” you say sarcastically, flinching when she practically jolts upright.

“Oh no, I’m not just a fan, I’m a fanatic.”

She halts in her tracks. “Actually, why don’t you do your project on it?”

You hum thoughtfully, mulling over the suggestion. “Sure,” you reply with a shrug. “Why not?”

“You can ask me anything,” she all but jumps in front of you with an excited smile. “I’ve been studying their stuff since I was a kid! My mom used to work for them, but she left because she got pregnant with my brother.”

“If I have any questions, you’ll be the first person I call. Or text. Most likely text.” The assurance makes her laugh, continuing the walk to the university.

Luckily, today just has a few morning classes so you’re able to finish by 2pm. The iced latte you’d gotten on the way had been your primary source of fuel throughout the lectures and project discussions, chugging down the last of it as soon as class concluded.

“That’s weird, what’s he doing here?” Glancing over at Holly, you follow her squinted gaze to a tall boy leaning against the wall next to the campus entrance. “What the fuck- Leo??”

You glance over, curiosity piqued. He looks up just as you approach, greeting Holly with a playful grin. “Hey, sis! You forgot your—” He pauses mid-sentence, his gaze landing on you. For a moment, you feel a chill, as if he’s sizing you up, but then he shakes it off, the charming smile returning.

He pushes himself off the wall, walking over to your friend with an air of effortless confidence. “Here you go,” he says, handing her a small package with a flourish, his demeanour playful and light.

“Thanks! You didn’t have to come all the way here,” she replies, genuinely grateful.

He shrugs, a cheeky glint in his eye. “Couldn’t let you go without your snacks, now could I?” He turns to you, his expression warm but with a hint of mischief. “And you must be the infamous friend I’ve heard so much about. Nice to finally meet you.”

“Infamous?” You question, fist-bumping him. “Not the wildest description I’ve ever gotten. I’m satisfied with that.”

He pauses, turning to glance at his sister with a sceptical eye. “How’d you get someone as cool as her to be your friend? What’d you do, blackmail them?”

You grin.

This is insanely validating. I like him.

“I did not,” Holly huffs, her cheeks flushing as she pushes her brother away with an embarrassed smile. “I gotta go for my elective now, have a safe trip home!” You wave her off with an amused smile, watching Leo protest vehemently to his sister.

Upon reaching home, you quickly take a shower and change into a more relaxed fit. If you were gonna get beat up during a spar, you’d at least do it wearing lighter clothing.

A knock on your door draws your attention. Opening it reveals Emily holding a cup filled with a liquid so hot you can see the steam coming off the surface in wisps. “I made some tea for you.” Her voice is hesitant.

Not again, you sigh internally. Every now and then she’d approach you with something like cookies or cake as a peace offering. You’ve always rolled your eyes and shut the door in her face.

However, you hesitate. Would it truly be so bad to accept it…?

“It’s yuzu tea,” she interjects quickly, seizing the moment your silence creates. “I saw your friend’s mother today and gave her a whole tumbler. I was also hoping you could join us at the restaurant downtown for your dad’s birthday. I know you usually celebrate just the two of you, but… maybe this time we could celebrate together?”

Your heart sinks, frustration rising beneath the surface. Of course she’d ask for something in return. Stop pretending to be my mom. I never asked you to.

A part of you stops the harsh words from spilling past your lips, pressing them together. You know you’re being completely unfair to her, the recently opened wound beginning to throb.

“Okay. I’ll be there.”

She blinks owlishly at your calm reaction, her hands remaining in the same position even after you remove the cup from her hands and drink from it. “Thanks,” you manage to say, angling yourself to squeeze past her figure in the hallway and walking to the door.

Cole’s confession flashes through your mind as you glance at your dad who’s adjusting his tie in the mirror, steps slowing to a halt as you watch him hum in the bathroom.

“Hey munchkin, looking forward to your lesson today?” He spots you from the corner of his eyes, turning to you with a bright smile.

You nod, adjusting your collar. “Yeah, thanks for signing me up for them.”

His hands freeze, brows furrowed in pure confusion. Hiding a chuckle, you continue to the door, putting on your shoes and leaving quickly before they start asking questions.

The phone rings in your pocket when you’re on the bus. Picking it up, you press it close to your ear as you alight, tapping the transit card on your way off. “Hello?”

“Class is cancelled today, Master Wu had to rush off to an appointment.”

“Oh.” You pull the phone away for a moment to see Cole’s name on the screen. “Why’re you the one calling me though?”

“We bumped into each other, but he forgot to let you know. He did tell me that dinner would be on us next time you come over after lessons though. Not like he’s paying me to cook anyway,” he grumbles at the last bit.

You hum in acknowledgement. “To be honest, I’m kinda…on the way already.” You admit.

“How near are you?”

You hesitate, your steps slowing to a halt. “Like…Right below the huge-ass mountain near? It’s chill though, I can just take the bus home.”

“No,” he pauses. “Just come on up. The rest of us are having Game Night, and we could use one more player.”

“Well…” You hum, glancing at the stairs. “If you say please, maybe I’ll consider it-”

“Please.”

Oh. Well, that was fast.

“You’re no fun, you know that, right?”

“You’re the one going up the stairs, aren’t you?”

You pause, glancing down at the number of steps you’ve already walked. “Damn you, Brookstone.” His sharp laugh cuts off when you press the red button to hang up, continuing the climb with a roll of your eyes.

Reaching the doors of the monastery takes a significantly shorter amount of time than you’d expect, but it’s more likely due to the increased levels of physical activity through the amount of walking you do every day and Master Wu’s classes.

The couch potato in you is still not sure if you should be grateful for it or not.

Cole’s the one who greets you at the doors, leaning against them nonchalantly while waiting for you to reach. “About time.” He narrowly misses the punch you throw his way.

“You couldn’t have asked Rocky to pick me up?”

“How could I? He’s resting right now.” You roll your eyes. “So how’s the project going?” He asks, referring to the one you'd been talking about over text a couple nights ago.

“If you want, I could ask Papa to let you interview him,” Cole grins, taking the bag from you as you bend down to take off your shoes before stepping onto the varnished wooden floors.

“It’s fine, I've changed companies. Ever heard of Borg Industries?”

He tilts his head in thought. “I’ve heard about them, yeah. You're gonna do your project on them now?”

Your stomach growls, interrupting your sentence. The room you’re about to pass catches your eye, Cole raising a brow at your grin. Entering the kitchen to grab a snack from the private stash he’d shown you just last week, you eye the various bags of chips on the countertop.

“You just got back from patrol?” At his nod, you veer toward the fridge and open it, grabbing a packet of frozen dumplings you’d seen him get during a random midnight grocery run at the convenience store nearby.

It’d been the first time you saw each other ever since ‘the talk’, but strangely enough, both of you immediately fell into lighthearted conversation when he asked about your classes.

He grabs the plate from a cupboard above. Spotting his fingers grasping at the edges of the plastic, you can sense the frustration brimming with every movement. Hiding a smile, you nonchalantly walk over and pull it away, examining it with the air of a professional before opening it with a simple tear.

“Call me mistaken but aren't you supposed to have, like, super strength?”

He chuckles, shaking his head as you dump the soon-to-be delicious snack on the plate. He takes the now-filled plate from your outstretched hand, placing it into the microwave and turning it on.

“Now I just have to do research on Cyrus Borg. You wouldn’t happen to know his assistant or something, would you? That superstar ninjadom power would really come in handy right now, soulmate.” The conversation resumes as easily as it’d stopped, accepting the cup of tea he hands you and take a small sip.

He takes a sip out of his own cup, shrugging. “I might know one of his assistants.”

A solid thump echoes through the kitchen as you set down your cup, your gaze turning serious. “You better not be playing with me, Brookstone. I can and will drain you dry during Monopoly.”

“I’m just saying,” he points out, “that favours are a give and take. So, I’ll do you this favour and you do me another.”

“And what exactly is this favour?” Crossing your arms, you eye him with suspicion.

“It’s no big deal. Just be Kai’s partner for Game Night.”

You blink, regarding him with scepticism. “That’s it? Just be his partner?” He nods, taking another sip. “Sure,” a slow grin spreads across your face. “I’ll do it. Then, you introduce me to this assistant and put in a good word.”

“Sure thing, soulmate.”

You watch him turn to take out the dishes from the dishwasher below the countertop, smiling softly. It’s almost insane how quickly everything had blown over. If not for him initiating the talk, you’re a hundred percent sure you would’ve continued to run away again and again until you’d been cornered.

In a way, you’re grateful for him. The whole romantic part of it would be sorted out by your future selves but for now? Being friends isn’t so bad. He sets the plate down, picks up a pair of chopsticks you’d set aside for use earlier and grabs a dumpling.

You’re too preoccupied with your thoughts to notice he’d placed it closer to you, having poked a small hole to let the hot steam escape. “Gonna eat?” He asks through a mouthful, gesturing to the plate.

You pick up your chopsticks and pick up the dumpling closest to you, blowing on it to cool it down before taking a bite, and chewing slowly. Glancing up, you notice him looking away hurriedly. “What?” You ask with a blank stare. “Do I have something on my face?”

“Yeah, it’s over here.” He gestures to his left cheek and you use your knuckle to rub against the spot. “You missed it,” he huffs in amusement, leaning forward. Automatically closing your eyes as he draws near, you wait patiently.

“Is it off yet?” His touch is almost feather-like, barely sensing it against your skin before you hear him sit back down in his seat. Hearing what you assume to be a sound of agreement, you open your eyes, only for them to widen at his red cheeks and teary eyes.

He uses his chopsticks to gesture at the hot dumplings as he chugs down a bottle of water, exhaling shakily when he finishes. “Hot.” Is all he can muster, roughly wiping away the tears while you dissolve into a fit of laughter.

After your initial laughter subsides, you let out a chuckle every now and then, continuing to eat. “Didn’t know you were here!” Looking up, you greet Jay with a casual wave as he saunters into the kitchen with a smug air about him.

“Heard you’re playing tonight. Prepare to get wrecked!”

“Please,” you scoff playfully, shoving off the arm he’d slung around your shoulders. “All the energy for my cancelled class is gonna go towards killing you guys off in Charades.”

“Don’t count your roosters before they hatch,” he shrugs in response, using Cole’s chopsticks to steal a dumpling. “Whose team are you on, anyway? Cole’s?”

“Kai’s.”

His arm freezes, and you can practically hear every muscle in his neck creak as he looks at Cole in silence. “...Kai?” He glances back down at you, his gaze filled with sorrow. “What did this despicable man do to make you agree?”

His arms are flung around your shoulders once more, but this time it’s in pity. “Wha- What did you make me agree to??” You demand, swivelling back toward Cole who simply smiles innocently as Jay pats your back.

Scowling at him, you bite down harshly on another dumpling, eyeing him in disbelief. Surely it wouldn’t be that bad, right? You don’t know what’ll happen or why Jay’s behaving this way, but surely it’s not terrible…

Right?

— — — — —

“How the fuck are we getting negative points???”

You can’t help the scoff of pure, utter bewilderment as you stare at the board in front of you. Turning to glare at Kai, he crosses his arms defensively. “Don’t blame me, you’re the one who couldn’t guess seagull.”

“In what universe was that a sea-” Cutting yourself off, you exhale, pinching the bridge of your nose as you try to calm down. “A seagull has two wings and a beak. Not an amalgamation of parts from Willy Wonka’s Factory.”

“That’s what I drew! Two wings and a beak and a body!” He splutters, the offended expression on his face instantly making you lose whatever remaining hope you have for the night ahead.

A snicker from the left draws your attention, turning to see Cole, Jay, and Nya instantly masking their expressions. They raise their brows in sync as if it were your idea to team up with Kai in the first place.

Your fingers curl into a fist, wanting nothing more than to march over to your stupid, dumb soulmate, and grab his collar, shaking him till he admits he’s wronged you. Unfortunately, reality sinks in when he stands up for his turn.

You watch as Jay and Nya cheer when Lloyd gets the charades right, Kai sulking next to you. “Fuck it,” you declare, grabbing his arm and pulling him to sit back upright. “We’re gonna beat these losers.”

“Those are some fightin’ words,” Nya pipes up, Jay giving her arm a squeeze in encouragement.

“Yeah, I don’t know about you but based on facts…” Lloyd trails off, pointing at the whiteboard as Cole uses a red marker to write down yet another point under their names, “we’re in the lead. And you know the rules-”

“I actually do not-”

“Losers treat the next group dinner.” Cole cuts you off, finishing Lloyd’s sentence as he grins maniacally at you.

Blinking, you can feel the last bits of your dignity slipping away from under you. Your partner and you exchange glances, fist-bumping each other. “Well, looks like you’ll have to get more sponsorships because we’ll be enjoying the entire restaurant menu on you guys.”

“Sure,” Jay snorts, waving dismissively. “On us. As if you’ll be able to beat Nya and me at Jenga.”

— — — — —

“You cheated.”

You shrug with an air of innocence. “Poor Jay…Sad, sad little Jay who couldn’t keep the tower from collapsing in on itself…Playing Jenga with a degree in Engineering and still losing…” Kai sighs sadly with a shake of his head, bending down to pick up the scattered pieces.

“Ugh-” Jay splutters, throwing his hands up in the air. “You cheated somehow, and I’m going to prove it. Zane!”

“From my calculations, it seems that she really did beat you, Jay. She tricked you by-” You cut him off with a loud hush, shaking your head urgently even as he mumbles out a response from below your hands covering his mouth.

“A magician never reveals their secrets.” You glare at Cole when he gently removes your hands from Zane’s face, the latter now able to speak properly. “What do you want, Brookstone?”

“Just for you to let Jay marinate in his loss.” He chuckles, helping you stand back up. He ignores his friend’s cry of outrage, taking the Jenga bricks from your hand. Kai stands up too, dumping whatever he has into Cole’s hands before sauntering off to the coffee table with a victorious grin.

“Everyone,” Pixel gasps, standing upright from her initial place on the couch. The room falls silent, tension cutting through the air as all eyes turn to her. “I tracked down the villain’s hideout. We need to go now.”

The playful banter evaporates, replaced by a rush of adrenaline and urgency. Cole’s expression shifts from playful to serious in an instant, and you can feel the weight of the moment pressing down. “Are you sure?” he asks, his voice steady but laced with concern.

Pixel nods, her excitement palpable. “I’ve got the location and everything. This could be our chance to finally confront them.”

“You wanna come along?” Surprised by his sudden invitation, you grin.

“If you insist.”

“I didn’t but, okay-” He lets out a slight cry when you hit his arm with a scowl. You take a surprised step back when Pixal lifts up the dartboard attached to the wall, pressing a button that reveals a hidden lift.

“Wait, you’re letting a civilian tag along?” Lloyd asks, placing an arm in front of you before you enter it.

“It’ll be fine, she’s been taking lessons from Master Wu. Besides, it’d be great to have experience!” Kai points out.

You nod along. “Yeah, what he said. Besides, I’m not just a civilian. I can hold my own,” you retort, crossing your arms defiantly. “I want to help.”

Cole steps closer, his tone firm yet encouraging. “She’s right, Kai. We need all the hands we can get. Besides, she knows what’s at stake here.”

Lloyd sighs, his arm lowering reluctantly. “Fine. But if anything goes sideways, you’re getting out of there.”

Pixal beams at you, the lift doors sliding open with a soft hum. “See? It’s gonna be fine! Just think of it as a field trip.”

As you step into the lift, you feel a mix of excitement and apprehension swirling in your stomach. The doors close, and the lift descends quickly, the sound of machinery humming around you.

“Okay, so what’s the plan?” you ask, trying to distract yourself from the rising tension. “And out of curiosity, am I considered an honorary ninja after this?”

Cole cringes, shaking his head at your bad attempt at lightening the mood. “Maybe after you defeat the Overlord single-handedly or have an attack that’s targeted at you.”

“Or have an arch-nemesis out to get you,” Lloyd (unhelpfully) chimes in.

“Let’s move!” Zane calls out, adjusting his gear as he steps into the lift behind you. “We can’t let this opportunity slip away.”

Jay grins widely. “Yeah! Let’s catch those bad guys!” His eagerness is infectious, and you can’t help but smile through the sudden nervousness making itself known in the depths of your stomach.

Pixal quickly outlines the plan. “We’ll split into two groups. Lloyd and Cole will take the east side while Kai and Zane cover the west. Jay and Nya, you’ll cover the entrance to make sure they can’t run. If you find anything suspicious, signal each other.”

“Got it!” Jay replies, cracking his knuckles. “I’m ready to show those crooks who they’re dealing with!”

The journey over is quick, all of them using their own vehicles while Cole lets you ride Rocky with him once more. The briny smell of the seawater hits your nose before the docks come into view, grimacing at the scent.

“Smells like piss.” Cole hums in agreement at your comment, diving down and landing. Once you disembark, Rocky dematerializes. The remaining vehicles come to a stop next to you.

“Stay sharp,” Kai reminds everyone, his expression serious. “If we see anything out of the ordinary, we regroup immediately.” You take the earpiece he hands to you, taking a step back when a screen materialises in front of your eyes.

“Hello. Do not be alarmed, this is merely a scanner to help detect and zoom in on anything we might find.” Pixal’s voice makes itself known in your ear, glancing around to see the rest already prepared to get in position.

“Let’s move out!” Cole whispers, nodding toward the entrance of the warehouse. You follow closely behind, your heart racing with each step. In fact, you’re not entirely sure you’re breathing at all.

As you approach the massive doors, you can see the dim light filtering through the cracks, casting ominous shadows on the ground. Cole raises his hand to signal for a moment of pause.

“On three,” he murmurs, his voice steady. “One… two… three!”

With a collective effort, you all push open the heavy doors, the sound of creaking metal echoing in the silence. As the doors swing wide, you expect to be greeted by the sight of henchmen or the stolen goods you’ve been hunting for. Instead, you’re met with…nothing.

The warehouse is empty.

“Shit,” you breathe, stepping further inside, eyes scanning the vast, open space. Shadows dance along the walls, but there are no signs of life. No stolen items, no villains, nothing but an unsettling quiet.

“Where are they?” Kai asks, his voice filled with disbelief. “They should’ve been here!”

Cole’s brow furrows as he surveys the area. “They couldn’t have just vanished. There must be something…”

Pixel, still communicating through your earpiece, adjusts her scanner. “I’m not picking up any heat signatures or movement inside. It’s as if they cleared out completely.”

Cole shakes his head, his determination unwavering. “No, this doesn’t feel right. They wouldn’t just abandon their hideout without a reason.”

A dim light flickers in the corner, catching your attention and drawing you away from the chaos around you as everyone starts to argue. As you step through the plastic shroud that covers the entrance to a separate area, an unsettling chill washes over you. The room is filled with silence, broken only by the faint rustling of your footsteps.

A massive map of Ninjago looms on the wall, its edges frayed and yellowed from the lack of sunlight. Red circles and ominous question marks encircle specific regions, each marked with frantic scrawls of black and red ink. The museum is crossed out, a bold slash that feels more like a threat than a mere ‘X marks the spot’.

“Guys?” you call out, your voice wavering as an unsettling feeling creeps into your gut. As the scanner detects something hidden behind the corner of the map, you feel your pulse quicken. You lean in closer, your heart pounding in your chest as you spot the edge of a photo peeking out.

“What’d you find?” Cole's voice breaks the stillness as he enters the room, pulling the plastic aside with a flicker of curiosity. He steps in, but his expectation for a casual discovery fades when he sees your face contorted in confusion and dread.

With trembling hands, you reach out and gingerly pull the photo free, a sense of foreboding washing over you. As you hold it up, the dim light reveals a bird’s eye view of you at a café, oblivious to the world around you, immersed in your work. The image is haunting, a snapshot of a moment that feels both ordinary and deeply unsettling.

The café looks familiar, but something about the angle of the shot feels invasive as if someone was watching you from afar, hidden in the shadows. You notice the way your focus is entirely on your laptop, unaware of the eyes that might have been tracking your every move.

“Is that…?” Cole starts, his voice trailing off as he takes a step closer, peering at the photo with wide eyes. The room feels colder now, the air thickening with the weight of unspoken fear.

“What the fuck?” you whisper, the realisation dawning on you like a dark cloud. This wasn’t just a coincidence; someone had been watching you. “They know me? They’ve been watching me?”

Something clatters to the ground as the plastic shroud is pulling away once more, each ninja entering one by one. “What’s wrong?” Nya asks, noticing the sudden change in your demeanour.

Everyone falls silent when you hold up the photo with a blank expression for them to see. They have similar reactions, looking at you with grave eyes before Jay breaks the silence.

“Guess you’re an honorary ninja now.”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

“Is what I’m seeing real, or am I just dreaming?” Jay slaps his wrist, hissing in pain when it stings. “Nope. Real, definitely real.”

“Shh!” Nya hushes him, excitement bubbling over as she grips the edges of the doorway. Her eyes widen as Cole pokes a hole in the dumpling, lifting it with a flourish before placing it down near you. “I bet she’s his soulmate. She has to be!”

“No shit,” Jay mutters sarcastically, but his tone shifts when he notices Nya’s raised brow. “But isn’t he all ‘Oooh, I’m big and buff and strong, I don’t need a soulmate because I’m sooo independent’?” He rolls his eyes, a smirk playing on his lips.

Nya presses a hand over her mouth, desperately stifling a laugh at his poor imitation. “Look at them! They’re so sweet,” she sighs, fanning her flushed face.

“Yeah, they remind me of us,” Jay murmurs dreamily, only to blink when Nya glares at him. “What?”

“Don’t you remember how our first date went?” The reminder makes him stiffen, a sheepish laugh escaping him. He squeezes her arm, his eyes pleading for her to drop it.

“Oh!” His wish is granted as Nya’s attention shifts back to the scene unfolding before them. They both watch as Cole leans over the table, fingers hovering hesitantly above your cheek.

“Is it off yet?” you ask, oblivious to the sudden tension in the air. Cole’s face flashes with panic as he quickly brushes off whatever it is before sitting back down, fanning his flushed cheeks.

In that split second when you open your eyes, Cole grabs an unpoked dumpling and pops it into his mouth whole before letting out a pained grunt.

“What is he doing??” Nya practically whisper-shouts, her eyes wide in disbelief.

“Well,” Jay allows himself a moment of smug satisfaction as he watches Cole immediately regret his life choices, chugging down the entire jug of water, “at least now you know who’s more lame.”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Taglist: @candyquokka @mossy-mika @em-100-blog @cursedreader @alicesmile1 @alexa24 @raegreenie4 @burdeningbitch @viennasthings @cadencannot @ml3czqo @nanasemo @certified-cole-simp @beescomet @theblindhag @mitbin24 @sweetlittlebumblebree @brooklyniswriting @cantbecreative @something-else3 @iinlovewithfictionalppl @itz-moonlight @jebesovovise @ryeheep @letthelightin2112 @classically-bored @clearlawyereaglewobbler @anajellyc <-(So sorry i genuinely forgot to tag you!!!! forgive me pls 🙏🏻🙏🏻)

#ninjago #lego ninjago #cole brookestone #cole brookstone x reader #cole x reader #ninjago x reader #cole ninjago #lego ninjago x reader

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farfromstrange · 1 year ago

Text

Do No Harm

CHAPTER TWO: Imposter Syndrome

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Summary: You've been trying your hardest to focus on your work, but there is something else that is bothering you. Claire decides to give you a call and check up on you. It seems like both of you are keeping secrets of your own, and then there is this handsome lawyer who refuses to leave your mind after he quite literally burst your little bubble of solitude...

Warnings for this chapter: Slight angst, mentions of domestic violence, Reader's POV, use of reader's fake name

Word Count: 4.3k

A/n: It took me a few tries to finish this chapter because I couldn't, for the life of me, settle on a plot, but I think I've got it figured out now. I didn't do the classic "this scene from another POV", I switched it up a bit, so what happened in chapter one isn't repeated word for word. I think it flows better like this. I hope you guys like it, and thank you for your support so far! I really appreciate it.

Read Chapter 2: Imposter Syndrome on AO3.

The human body holds up to six liters of blood. Without saline or a blood transfusion, losing more than two liters can be fatal—and every drop lost after that decreases your chance of survival. A paper cut won’t kill you, but a gunshot wound might. It’s a simple equation that doesn’t require a medical degree to solve.

If the human body experiences trauma though, everything is on the line. A nicked vessel or artery can lead to a bloodbath. Trauma to any of the major organs can lead to internal bleeding and cause the body to suffer fatal consequences. You could lose too much blood too fast, or the blood could travel to your brain, and you could herniate.

Depending on the place of injury, trauma can lead to a large number of complications that are therefore a threat to life. But it’s not just blood that the human body needs to survive; oxygen is another vital player in the game against time. Without it, the brain dies, and if the brain is dead, there is nothing anyone can do to bring you back.

Many things could kill a human being, and many complications could occur in a split second, and that makes trauma an unpredictable event.

Your fingers instantly stop moving over the keys of your computer when the black phone on your desk starts screaming. At first, your eyes switch to your phone, but you have any non-emergent calls silenced. That explains it.

You flinch. You suddenly become painfully aware of the city’s lights shining on you from behind, the blue light of your laptop illuminating your face and causing your pupils to shrink, and the bulb in your desk lamp that is flickering every so often, reminding you that you need to switch it sometime soon.

You pinch the bridge of your nose, then press the acceptance button. You answer the phone. “This is Doctor Clarke at Metro General,” you say. “How can I help you?”

“Jesus,” the familiar voice reaches your ears, and you let out an almost annoyed sigh. “You sound like hell,” Claire answers.

“And you don’t sound sick,” you retort.

You aren’t sure what to make of her sudden mystery illness, or why she didn’t tell you and you had to find out from the hospital administrator who was losing it over the fact that her favorite nurse called out sick that morning.

The phone goes silent for a short moment before she says, “It’s complicated.”

“Hey, we all need sick days sometimes,” you shrug. “Just took us all by surprise, is all.”

“Are you trying to turn this around on me so we won’t have to talk about you?”

Your lips part in a dry chuckle. “Is this about me?” you ask, even though you know very well that it is. You’re the one trying to deflect.

“You silenced your phone.”

With another sigh, you push the stack of papers you’ve been working on aside and take the next folder from the pile. “I’m fine.” You hold the X-ray picture up to the light, squinting your eyes. “Just... splendid, yeah. You want me to do a psych eval? Urine sample? My social security number?”

You can physically hear her roll her eyes at your comment. “Can’t I just be worried about you without you taking it like a personal attack?”

It’s a loaded, rhetorical question asked in a tone that you are more than familiar with. It is a train wreck waiting to happen, but Claire is your friend—a very caring friend, too—and she hardly ever lets loose when she wants to know something.

She knows you better than anyone, after all. She knows everything, even the parts you swore to never talk about again—parts you swore you would take to the grave.

That is the purpose of a new life, isn’t it? Forgetting the past ever happened, then moving on? If that could actually heal trauma, life would be so much easier. Unfortunately, denial tends to make the wounds bleed faster. You will die faster if you keep it all bottled up, but it’s easier said than done when it comes to reality. Sometimes, denial is the only luxury you can afford for yourself, even if it slowly kills you.

You have seen your fair share of traumatic injuries pass in and out of the emergency room over the years. Not just physically but mentally as well. There is only a small margin of error in an even smaller time frame in which traumatic injuries can be treated without lifelong consequences. The scars though, they remain forever.

“Look,” Claire continues softly, “I’m worried about you. I know you hate talking about yourself, but every once in a while, I have to make sure you’re alright and not... falling apart or something.”

You swallow thickly, the lump slowly starting to hurt your esophagus. “Why would I be falling apart?” you question, but your voice no longer has the same level of conviction in it.

Feigned confidence doesn’t go a very long way, you’ve noticed. You can’t stand your ground when you don’t believe in where you’re standing.

“A little birdy told me you had a bad day. That’s why.”

In the halls of a hospital—any hospital—word travels faster than lightning. You roll your eyes, but you don’t know what to say. She isn’t wrong. You did have a bad day. Your blood is still boiling. Everything in you feels a hundred pounds heavier. You may not be falling apart because there is not much of a foundation left to fall apart, but the feeling is eerily similar.

You used to be a beloved surgeon at a prestigious hospital for all five years of your residency, but with each year that passed, what had once been just a spark turned into gigantic flames that slowly began torching your skin. They burned your flesh and dragged it down to your fragile bones. Your body went into shock over the years. You became septic. And it almost killed you, too.

Your heart froze in place before it miserably cracked. It didn’t take long before the inferno took over every last crevice of your life. It burnt out everything that was remotely good for you. You were so dependent on something—someone—that was slowly poisoning you.

You ran for months. You moved from State to State, you changed your name and your whole identity twice. You tried everything to get away, but your demons kept haunting you. The distance between you and your old life grew bigger until eventually, you reached the other side of the country, hundreds of miles from the hell you escaped from. There was nothing left in your past to exist for, so you became someone else. You lost yourself and gained a stranger’s identity in return. Someone who wasn’t scarred from a battle that she almost fully lost.

You thought it would be easy to pretend to be someone else, someone without the same wounds that have been inflicted on you, but that turned out to be the wrong thing to believe.

Claire’s voice rings out again. “What’s going on with you, Liv?” she asks.

You’re not really present at the moment, but this time, you hear her.

You shake your head. “Nothing.” It’s a blatant lie, but it rolls over your tongue so easily, you are tempted to believe it yourself before your friend even can.

“You keep zoning out,” she says. “You’re not helping your case.”

“It’s been a long day, that’s all. What’s going on with you?”

Her lips part in a soft exhale. You hit the nail right on the head. “Nothing’s going on with me. I just had to take a sick day. Migraines, you know? I get them sometimes.”

You don’t buy it. Her voice sounds strained, but more like she is forcing herself to sound sicker than she is. Not that you are allowed to judge, it simply strikes you as odd, considering that she isn’t usually like this, and it makes you wonder what else she is keeping from you.

A pregnant pause follows. “I heard about the girl,” Claire says then, changing the subject. You’re both way too good at that. You’re hypocrites.

“Annie,” you cut her off. “Her name’s—was Annie.”

You keep replaying it over and over in your mind. From the moment you received the page to the ER to the little girl landing on your operating table, you retrace all of your steps. You rethink every decision you made, every uttered order, every cut, and every stitch. Every time you do, you come up empty.

Annie was six years old. She got hit by an oncoming car. It was a gruesome sight, but you kept telling yourself that it could have been worse. She was stabilizing when you took her to the operating room. All the tests suggested that controlling the damage could buy some valuable time for the specialists to do their jobs. In your mind, the path was clear to a full recovery.

Everything you did to save her life ended up doing absolutely nothing.

It elicited a feeling that you are more than used to—inadequacy. You know that it is utterly selfish to think that way; this isn’t even about you. The feeling wraps like a noose around your heart, but you can’t allow yourself to make this about you. You’re not that type of person.

Claire takes your silence as an answer. “I logged into the hospital server and took a look at the X-rays,” she says. “That aortic tear was irreparable, as much for you as it would’ve been for the world’s best cardiothoracic surgeon. This wasn’t your fault.”

Your throat tightens. “You don’t know that,” you argue. “I could have caught it earlier. I could’ve… I could’ve done something.”

“No, Liv, you couldn’t have. But I think you know that.”

You search the depths of your mind for the right words to say, but you come up with none. “Who blabbed, anyway?” you ask.

In this case, though, the question is, who didn’t? Everyone must have heard about Annie by now, and the people around you care too much. It was bound to reach Claire’s ears eventually. You just didn’t think it would happen so soon.

Claire holds off on her answer for a moment. “Doesn’t matter,” she answers. It’s the kindest choice. “What matters is that you can’t beat yourself up for something that wasn’t your fault.” Her voice suggests that she’s smiling.

“I…I’m fine,” you lie.

“I know you’re not.”

“You’re the one who called in sick but clearly isn’t. You don’t see me bugging you about it.”

That shuts her up for a moment. “This isn’t about me,” Claire tries to talk herself out of it, but you see right through her.

“Are you sure?” you ask.

“I—” She sighs. “I promise you, if there was something going on, I’d tell you.”

You should return the sentiment. You should tell her what you’re really thinking, but you’re mute. When it comes to your own feelings, all words in the English dictionary elude you.

Still, the feeling that Claire is lying to you keeps eating away at you. She has no reason to. Or maybe she has, but it’s none of your business. You’re curious, maybe a little worried, but you can’t expect her to tell you every little thing about her life and then refuse to do the same because you can’t possibly ask for help with something you don’t even understand yourself.

You’re miserable enough as it is. You would rather suffer through it alone than bother her with your chronic overthinking and the fear of failure.

“I’m still cat-sitting for Jenny,” she breaks you out of your thoughts.

You chuckle slightly. “But you’re allergic to cats,” you say.

“I know, but…” She stops herself. “The point is, I still have an almost full bottle of white wine in the fridge and there’s this deliciously cheap pizza place around the corner. Their breadsticks are to die for, trust me. You could come over after your shift and we could look after that stupid cat together. Maybe. Just until we both feel better.”

Until you both feel better. You feel like it would take more than wine and pizza to make you feel better.

You need to sulk. You need to marinate in your misery. That way, you can suck it up and be better next time. Everything else seems like too much of a waste of time.

You shatter what little hope she had about you agreeing to her offer like a full wine glass on a white cloth, sure to leave stains. Your hand momentarily motions toward the stack of paperwork, but then you remember that she can’t see over the phone. “I wish I could,” you say, “but I have to finish my surgical reports by tomorrow.”

Claire nods slowly. “Are you sure it’s the paperwork?”

“I promise.”

She accepts defeat. She can’t change your mind. You’re stubborn, determined, and a pain in the ass most of the time. She still loves you, but she has long given up on forcing you out of your shell.

Sometimes, which is more often than not, you prefer to be miserable because you have no idea how to be anything else.

“Well, I tried. So… at least call me if you need anything,” she says.

You offer her a smile, but it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. You’re tired. Your heart is pounding from all the caffeine and the frustration of the unknown. You have paperwork. As long as you have paperwork, you’re occupied. It’s as good a reason to avoid talking about anything that could be considered even remotely personal.

“Thank you, Claire. For everything,” your voice is barely above a whisper. “Take care of yourself. I’ll talk to you later.”

You hate that you’re like this, but you can’t change who you are now or what all those years of suffering have made out of you. You can’t change the fact that underneath Olivia Clarke, it is not who you are. And it will never be who you are because her identity is a fraud.

You may have escaped the worst time of your life and traded it for a fresh start, but that doesn’t take away the paralyzing fear that still sits deep in your bones, making it impossible for you to sleep at night. It may be a fresh start to a new life, but the slate is far from clean. There are bloodstains that you can’t get out. Stains that will haunt you forever.

Every day and every night that you spend at the hospital, you’re reminded of the terrible past that threatens to overshadow your future whenever you set foot outside. Your name may be Olivia Clarke, but that will never be your real name, no matter how badly you try to pretend it to be. And on some days, it breaks you just a little more when you fail at the one thing you have always excelled at. The one thing you have dedicated your life to. To do something good, to be worth something, and to prove the cruel monsters in your mind wrong about their assessment of you.

You don’t want to be a coward. You don’t want to be weak. You don’t want to be dependent on anything or anyone ever again. You forgot how to be happy. You became someone you’re not because the person you used to be was broken by someone she thought she could trust.

He took everything from you, and he took all that you are. Olivia was never taken advantage of.

Claire saved your life. She knows the truth, but facts aren’t enough. She’s your only support system, the only one who knows who you truly are, deep down, and yet she knows nothing at all.

Long after you’ve hung up the phone, you start wandering the halls of Metro General. You haven’t quite figured out what you’re looking for yet. You want to be alone. You want to be not needed. You want to exist somewhere that isn’t here. And you don’t want to be found, just for a little while.

When you get settled on an empty bed in one of internal medicine’s abandoned hallways that had to be emptied after severe budget cuts affected the hospital, the tears start pouring out without warning. You barely manage to stifle the sobs that slip past your lips. You hate crying. You used to believe that it was a sign of weakness, but tears have become as much of a partner in crime to you as the pain has.

It’s not as easy as it used to be to hold all of those treacherous feelings in—feelings you don’t even understand yourself—and that makes you hate yourself enough to cry even harder. Because you try, try, and you try even harder as you give all of yourself over and over again to be someone you never thought you would turn into, and still, you find yourself failing more times than you could possibly count.

Your life ended when you met the man who ruined you; ever since then, you have only been a shell of the person you used to be, and there is seemingly nothing you can do about it other than accept that Olivia Clarke is who you are now, and she is all you can be.

You didn’t expect another lonely soul in need of an escape to find his way to your little haven. This hallway isn’t even on the hospital map anymore, but he still somehow found his way here.

Your eyes switch to his cane, the red glasses, and the way he so awkwardly carries himself when he seems to realize that he, in fact, isn’t alone. You know that feeling of instant disappointment all too well, and he just caught you crying, which only makes matters worse.

After the initial awkwardness has dissipated and you get to talking, you take a moment to appreciate him. His name is Matthew. He is a defense attorney. He is unlike any man you’ve ever met before. You’re cautious when it comes to new people, but there is something almost calm about him. He’s funny, charming, and he’s respectful. He made you feel comfortable from the start.

There is a mystery surrounding him. You know all about mysteries. They draw you in. They make you feel less alone in a way. He is the biggest one you have encountered so far.

People tend to consider you an enigma, too. Most of them are wary of you because you barely share anything about yourself. You’re still learning, even after two years, to be someone new. You’re constantly reinventing yourself because all you were before is gone now. You lost yourself in the fire. So, most people you meet don’t talk much when they do; you’ve gotten used to having only one friend. It keeps your identity safe, as guarded as you are. It’s the safest bet for everyone involved—or everyone not involved.

Matthew is different. He seems genuinely curious, but he doesn’t pry. And that makes you open yourself up to him, even if it is just your body language. He’s sitting right next to you, his calm voice like a gentle symphony in your ear. He serenades you every time he speaks. That is a dangerous quality. He’s an attractive man, and you can’t keep your eyes off of him. You can’t stop listening. He’s like a work of art—a damaged work of art.

The man before you is broken and bruised. That’s what makes him so mysterious. The hesitation you showed when he introduced himself, indirectly asking for a piece of you in return, shows when you ask about his injuries.

You have seen all kinds of injuries, including those on a blind man who fell down the stairs. Matthew doesn’t fit the profile, and that only makes him more mysterious and therefore more interesting to you.

You have to stop yourself before you ask too many questions. You don’t want to push him away, but you also can’t draw him in. You can be nice, but that is as far as you are willing to go. You hold your walls so high that no one can break through them, no matter how fascinating or attractive they are.

Matthew is a dangerous man because he makes you feel things that you have long told yourself never to feel again. But it’s hard when he makes it so easy to like him.

You patch him up. It’s not just professional courtesy; he seems like he desperately needs someone to look after him. You are being nice to him, that is all. You keep telling yourself the same thing.

You’re still disappointed when you get paged to the emergency room and you have to leave him behind. The chances that you will see him again are low, and they shrink to zero when you return to the hallway four hours later and find it dark and empty again. The plastic packaging of the bandages you used on him is still lying around, but that is all that is left of him. All you have is a memory of a very unexpected encounter that will probably never occur again.

But maybe that isn’t such a bad thing, after all. At least like this, you can’t make the mistake of falling for a guy claiming to be nice. At least like this, you can keep your fragile and already broken heart safe from enduring the same kind of pain ever again.

You pass the nurse’s station in the emergency room on your way out. Dropping the chart of your last patient on the counter, you wish everyone a good night.

“Liv, before you leave–” One of the senior nurses stops you dead in your tracks, “Someone left a card for you,” she says.

You turn around, frowning at her. “A card?” you ask. “Who did?”

Her lips curl into a mischievous smile. “Handsome fella. And he had good manners.”

Your mind reels. There are only a handful of people that would fit that description. Every time someone leaves something behind for you, your first response is to panic. Your blood pressure spikes. You can feel your heart beating up to your throat and your vision blurs. You’re not a fan of the suspense or knowing grins, and it’s obvious.

The nurse’s smile fades and she rummages through the stack of papers next to the computer. “He only knew your first name and his blindness made it a bit harder to figure out who he was talking about, but thankfully we only have one excellent trauma surgeon named Olivia,” she says, her eyes still twinkling. She can’t help it.

You let out an audible exhale. Your body relaxes. Your heart rate slows down. You can finally see her clearly again, and she slides the card across the counter for you to take. You want to apologize for the hostility, but her face tells you that she understands.

The next time your heart starts beating faster, it isn’t out of panic. You look down at the names on the card and the distinctive number on the back, and your brain releases a sudden rush of dopamine. It’s late, you’re tired, but somehow this little gesture puts a surprising smile on your face.

You shouldn’t be as excited as you are. Your plan for this evening has been tossed far out of the window in an instant.

“So,” the nurse asks, “who is he? A patient? A friend?” She wiggles her eyebrows. “A guy from Hinge?”

You shake your head. “Just… a guy I met,” you answer.

If he were an official patient, this would be highly unethical and you would have to toss his number into the nearest trash can.

The blood has permanently settled into your cheeks. You’re not usually the kind of person who blushes. It’s infuriating.

With a chuckle, she leans over. “Well, either way, the guy was smoking. Said you should give him a call. I hope for your sake that you do.”

You keep twisting and turning the card. “What else did he say?”

“Not much. Just said that I should give this to you and that you should call him if you want. You must’ve made quite the impression.”

Your teeth dig into your bottom lip. You would’ve never suspected this. You are essentially still a stranger to him, and he still left you his number. He wants you to call him.

It makes no sense, and yet it flatters you like nothing has in quite a while.

You let out a soft sigh before stuffing the card into the pocket of your coat. Looking up, you meet the nurse’s curious eyes.

Your mind is taking its time to process your thoughts and the feelings connected to your thoughts.

She chuckles at the bewildered look in your eyes. You must look like a fool. “Where does one meet a specimen like that anyway, if you don’t mind me asking?” she says. “‘Cause I desperately need me one of those.”

A beat of silence follows. Then, you wet your lips and answer, “Abandoned hallways. Way more effective than Hinge, apparently.”

The subtle joke makes her laugh. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

You put in the effort to fake a smile with your nod. “Well, thank you,” you say. “You guys have a good shift. If you need anything, page me.”

“Will do,” she says. The other nurses nod. Of course, they listened in on your conversation.

With another small wave in their general direction, you make your way outside into the cool night air. You retrieve the business card from your coat, your eyes roaming over the names carefully printed on it, and the Braille that has been added for obvious reasons.

Nelson & Murdock. Attorneys at law.

From what he told you, this is probably the only somewhat expensive thing he and his partner afforded for a semi-successful marketing plan for their practice. It almost makes you chuckle.

Matt Murdock is a very fascinating man, though as you stare at the card and the number on the back you can’t help but feel a slight hint of unease bubble up in your chest, and you ask yourself, what did you get yourself into?

Tag List: @shiorimakibawrites @allllium @siampie @auroraslibrary @roseallisonparker @abucketofweird @thatonegamefish @capylore @kniselle @sumo-b98 @peachstarliight @danzer8705 @kakamixo @littlehappyperson

#matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x f!reader #matt murdock angst #daredevil #matt murdock x you #daredevil x reader #matt murdock fluff #reader insert #matt murdock fic #doctor!reader #medical drama #matt murdock imagines #charlie cox #do no harm

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c-e-d-dreamer · 8 months ago

Text

When We Howl, the Moon Will Cower: Chapter 4

A/N: I'd say I'm sorry this chapter is so long, but I feel like no one actually wants to hear that. We've got a little bit of everything! Cassian getting his ass handed to him. Nessian banter. Mama A being the worst. And SMUT! Anyways, hope everyone enjoys

Additional note: I'm really sorry to everyone on my tag list. Tumblr won't let me tag any accounts for some reason. It won't let me select when I paste it in and it keeps saying "no blogs found" when I try typing manually which I know is a damn lie 😭

Read on AO3 // Chapter Masterlist // Previous Part // Next Part

Cassian

Cassian watches as Nesta works through the combination, fists hitting against Cresseida’s raised palms. Her hair is tied back in a braid that runs down her back, the strands swishing across her shoulder blades with each movement and glinting beneath the rays of the afternoon sun. She’s been at it for a while, pink coloring the apples of her cheeks and stretching down her throat to her collarbones, and even from where he’s standing, Cassian can see the beads of sweat speckled across her skin.

Before he can stop them, his thoughts start to spiral down and down. He still remembers the last time he saw that sheen along her skin. Still remembers exactly how far down that flush can go. His body still too keyed-up after sleeping beside her the night before. He has to tilt his head up toward the sky with a sigh, determined to cool the heat sparking and simmering in his veins.

When Cassian focuses his attention back down, Nesta and Cresseida have moved on to sword practice. Wooden sword in hand, Nesta moves first slowly then with more speed through the steps Cresseida directs. Cassian keeps waiting for Cresseida to correct Nesta’s stance, but after the fourth repetition, he can’t take it any longer, striding across the training rings.

“Watch your foot.”

Nesta sighs at the sound of his voice, dropping her wooden sword to her side and turning to him with an unimpressed expression. “What?”

“Your foot. You’re turning it inward each time you lunge,” Cassian explains, gesturing down toward the foot in question. “You’ll lose strength and control doing that.”

Nesta glances down to her own feet, and Cassian wonders briefly if she intends to ignore the advice out of pure stubbornness, out of pure, witchy spite. Another way for her to pull one over on him while they’re trapped in this blazing wildfire burning around them, between them. But instead, surprisingly, Nesta readjusts her stance, shifting her foot so it faces forward.

“Thanks,” Nesta mutters, raising her sword again to work through the same sequence. “Did you need something else then?”

“Just trying to help, sweetheart.”

“And yet, I don’t recall ever asking for it.”

“Cassian!”

Cassian turns at the call of his name, finding Baz just outside the training rings. For once, there’s no smile on his third’s face, his brown eyes missing their usual, playful spark. It has cold dread flooding through Cassian’s limbs, crystalizing between his ribs until the weight twists and presses in. He breathes through the churning in his gut, but his muscles feel tense, his lips pressed into a grim line by the time Baz reaches him.

“What’s happened?” Cassian demands, skipping right past pleasantries.

“Alistair and Cormac have returned,” Baz explains.

Cassian sighs softly, squinting back toward the village and the rows of cabins, his mind reeling over this news. There’s no denying the relief that floods through him, the way it soothes the fear that always sparks within him every time they send out scouts. But what did they see? What information are they bringing back? It’s a stark reminder of the storm clouds looming just over the horizon, of the thunder shaking the ground beneath Cassian’s feet, beneath the pack’s security.

Nodding to himself, Cassian turns his attention back to Baz. “Gather the elders. We’ll meet immediately.”

“Already on it.”

Baz turns on his heels, jogging away, and Cassian watches him go before making his way toward the meeting hall with another sigh. Anxiety prickles across his skin at what they’ll learn, what will be discussed. He makes it a few steps outside of the training rings when the sound of a second set of footsteps reaches his ears, Cassian stopping short. He turns to find Nesta walking beside him, her brows furrowing at their sudden halt.

“What are you doing?” Cassian asks, gesturing back toward the training rings. “Go back to training with Cresseida.”

“It sounds like there’s important news, clearly an important meeting,” Nesta offers, peering up at him as if it’s obvious.

“And?”

“And? And I’m joining you.”

Cassian scoffs, crossing his arms. “You’re not attending this meeting.”

“What,” Nesta snaps dryly, her tone low and incredulous. “Why not?”

“I’m not having a witch in the room when we discuss pack business.”

Cassian is certain that the glare Nesta settles him with would cut down a lesser man where he stands. The blue of her eyes is pure ice, a fire burning in them and promising to swallow him whole in a blazing storm. She steps closer to him, her chest brushing against his own with every annoyed, heaving breath, lip pulled back in a sneer.

“I am your wife,” Nesta reminds him, words cold and clipped.

Cassian leans down until they’re eye to eye, offering a glare of his own. “I didn’t choose you.”

This close together, Cassian catches it, the way her mask slips for just a moment. He almost thinks he imagined it, that flash of emotion in her eyes, before the fury returns. He doesn't dare look down, look away from her gaze, but he can feel the sparks of silver flames prickling across his skin where their hands hang a hairsbreadth apart. He resets his stance, shifting his feet and preparing for the impact of her magic.

“You’re a godsdamned bastard,” Nesta seethes.

She doesn’t say anything else, surprisingly keeping a leash on her magic and her rage. Instead, she turns on her heel, stalking back toward Cresseida on the other side of the training rings. Cresseida meets Cassian’s gaze briefly, shaking her head, before holding out the wooden sword for Nesta to take again. But Cassian doesn’t have time for disappointment or other’s opinions on what he should or shouldn’t do.

On how he should or shouldn’t run his pack.

He winds his way through the village until he reaches the meeting hall. Baz and Emerie are already standing outside, and he offers them both a nod in greeting.

“Are all the elders gathered?”

“Everyone’s gathered and ready, yeah,” Baz explains, glancing behind him to the open doorway.

“Where's Nesta?” Emerie asks, looking pointedly over Cassian’s shoulder as though she expects the witch to appear.

“Hell if I know,” Cassian shrugs, moving to step forward into the meeting hall but Emerie is quick to step directly into his path, blocking him. He rolls his eyes. “Last I left her, she was at the training rings with Cresseida.”

“Should we wait for her before we start, then? One of us can go grab her,” Baz offers.

Cassian lets out a derisive snort. “Why would we wait for her? She’s not attending a pack meeting.”

The cold look Emerie settles him with rivals Nesta’s. “She’s your wife.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that? Did everyone forget that I didn’t choose her?”

“Did you forget that she didn’t choose this either?” Emerie demands, smacking him hard in the chest. “You were there. Her mother practically sold her and her sisters like cattle. I thought I already told your dumbass you need to respect her.”

“We don’t have time for this,” Cassian growls, side stepping around Emerie and into the meeting hall. “Let’s go.”

“Fucking idiot…”

~ * * * ~

The sigh that tumbles past Cassian’s lips is heavy, icy claws sinking into his lungs and drawing blood with the exhale. He digs his fingers through his hair, the strands already starting to knot with how many times he’s repeated the gesture. The map continues to lay splayed out across the wood of the table in front of him, and all he can do is stare at it, blink at it.

“We’ll have to inform the vamps and the Vanserras,” Baz’s voice draws Cassian from his quickly spiraling thoughts. “We can’t keep this information to ourselves.”

“A temple,” Emerie whispers, almost to herself. “What kind of evil do you have to be to attack and destroy a temple?”

“If Cormac is right, they got whatever they were looking for,” Cassian comments, leaning forward over the map and sliding his finger along the parchment, along the ink of the lines, the trees and the mountains. “Hybern’s even more dangerous now, and we need to be ready. We need to up our defenses along the western lines, make sure our warning system gives us as much time as possible.”

“You really think Hybern would try something? Attack the pack directly?” Baz asks, a hollowness taking over his usual sunny expression.

“Mother knows what Hybern is thinking or planning,” Cassian says, pushing back up to his feet. “But I’m not willing to risk it. Not willing to risk our pack.”

Emerie nods in agreement, the weight of what Cormac and Alistair described finding at the temple clearly still pressing on her even as she defiantly holds her chin up high. “I’ll make sure the new orders are delivered and implemented.”

“Tomorrow,” Cassian offers, giving Emerie’s shoulder a comforting squeeze. “We’ll worry about implementing everything tomorrow. I think we all could use a night off after that.”

“And maybe a drink,” Baz mutters, the barest hint of a smile starting to return.

Cassian chuckles softly, unable to deny the idea sounds appealing. He has a bottle of whiskey back at his cabin that’s smooth and aged, and it might just be calling his name. “And maybe that too.”

Cassian rolls up the map and returns it the rightful place, following his second and third out the door the elders vacated what feels like hours ago. True to his teasing words, Baz heads for the pack’s favorite watering hole, Emerie vanishing toward her cabin to find her wife. It leaves Cassian to make the trek back to his own cabin alone.

The meeting lasted for hours, darkness having now blanketed across the village. The clouds shimmer and shift across the face of the moon, the silver light rippling like waves across the grass where it bleeds through, casting shadows over the trees and cabins. He just hopes it means that Nesta may have already retired for the night. The last thing he wants after that meeting is to rehash an argument with her.

He’s already dreaming of a tall glass of whiskey, of settling before the fire and relaxing at least for one night, as he makes his way up the steps to his cabin. He reaches forward for the handle of the front door, but a shock jolts through his fingertips, skittering up his arm and through his entire body. His eyebrows pinch, and he shakes out the pins and needles before trying again, only to earn the same reaction, his every muscle tensing in response.

“What the fuck…”

Cassian raises his hand, carefully, slowly, pressing his palm forward. The magic glimmers around his touch, spreading outward in silver swirls that Cassian suspects must be some sort of runes. They stretch all the way up and around the cabin like a shield.

A ward.

She’s put a ward around the cabin, locking him out.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Nesta?” Cassian shouts, loud enough she can hear him from wherever she is inside. “Let me in!”

Only silence answers Cassian, mocks him.

“Nesta, I know you can hear me! This isn’t fucking funny.”

Cassian growls in frustration when there’s still no response. He slams a fist against the ward, but the magic seems to give back whatever impact thrown at it, silver flaring around him and the force sending him stumbling back a few steps. He scrubs a hand through his hair and down his face, sending a silent prayer up to the Mother. He doesn’t know how long his stubborn witch of a wife intends to let him stew, but it’s clear that it’s going to be a long night.

~ * * * ~

Nesta

Nesta tugs on the strands of her hair, shifting them until they sit how she wants. She holds them steady in place, plucking the pin from between her teeth and sliding it between the strands. Examining her work in the mirror, she hums quietly in approval, finally stepping back and toward the door. She winds her way through the cabin and to the front door, but her steps stop short when she pulls it open.

Cassian is curled up on his side, his back to the door. One arm is tucked up beneath his head, cheek pillowed on his bicep, and his hair is a tangled mess all around his face. For a moment, Nesta can do nothing but gape, nothing but blink in surprise at the sight of him here in front of the door. When she’d warded the cabin last night, she assumed that he’d find somewhere else to sleep, perhaps crash with Baz wherever the third’s cabin is.

Guilt begins to spool in Nesta’s gut, but then she remembers everything that happened yesterday. She remembers how Cassian seems set on locking her out of everything involving this pack. As if being isolated from her family through this farce of a marriage wasn’t bad enough, she’s stuck being just as isolated here thanks to her dear husband. As if Hybern and its king aren’t as much of a threat to her as they are to Cassian and the pack.

All of the anger and rage from yesterday blazes back through Nesta’s veins like a wildfire, and she raises her chin, stepping right over Cassian’s still sleeping form. Hopefully, now, the alpha has learned his lesson. He wants to play games and shut her out of everything, then he can enjoy sleeping outside in the cold and being shut out of his own cabin.

“Nesta.”

Nesta sighs, pausing just two steps down from the cabin. She turns around just in time to watch Cassian scramble up to his feet. Despite not being in his wolf form, his eyes still glow golden, furious in the way they spark and blaze. His lips are pulled back in a snarl, brows pinched down low as he glares at her.

Nesta raises a sardonic brow, not giving him an inch with her cool expression. “Sleep well? Who knew you took your inner wolf so seriously that you take to sleeping outside now.”

“Do you think this is a fucking joke?” Cassian growls, fists clenching at his sides.

“I don’t know. Did you think yesterday was a fucking joke?”

Cassian scoffs, but Nesta has heard enough. She spins on her heel and continues down the steps that lead away from the cabin and back toward the village.

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

“Emerie is waiting for me with a carriage,” Nesta explains, not stopping or turning around. “I don’t want to be late for tea with my sisters.”

She can feel Cassian’s ire following her the whole way, burning a brand into her spine. The low sound of his growl practically echoes in her ears. It has a self-satisfied smirk tugging up Nesta’s lips the whole rest of the way, and if Emerie notices her expression, she thankfully doesn’t comment on it as Nesta climbs inside the carriage, as it carries them away from the village.

It feels almost strange to be back at the Archeron manor, to peer up at the dark red brick, the spires, and the climbing ivy through the carriage window. Almost subconsciously, her thumb slides across the slightly raised skin on the back of her left hand, tracing the scar back and forth. A deep breath in and out, and Nesta opens the carriage door, stepping out and into the misty morning light.

She walks up the front steps, the front door swinging open right before she reaches it. At least, the magic imbued within the wood and brick of the house still recognizes her. Nesta steps inside, instantly greeted by the familiar smells of fresh lavender, ginger, and basil, and follows the halls all the way to the sunroom at the back of the manor.

The round table in the room is already covered in a white, lace tablecloth, a steaming teapot placed at the center. Elinor sits primly in the seat directly across from the doorway back into the main house, hair neatly and harshly tugged back away from her face and chin raised high. As soon as Nesta steps inside, her mother’s cool eyes are pinning her in place.

“Mama,” Nesta greets quietly.

Feyre is already settled in the seat directly to Elinor’s right, so Nesta takes the seat across from their mother. She chances a glance toward her youngest sister, but Feyre has her eyes cast downward, staring intently at her plate. Nesta doesn’t miss the way Feyre chews on her bottom lip, the way she aimlessly pushes around her eggs, even as her grip on her fork is white knuckled.

Giving her hands something to do, Nesta reaches forward for the teapot, pouring herself a cup. Thankfully, just as she’s taking a sip, Elain steps inside the sunroom, brown eyes wide and almost nervous as they flit around the table. She’s quick to settle into the final seat beside Nesta, fingers twisting and fisting into the skirts of her dress.

“My girls,” Elinor begins, taking the time to look at all three of them. “Back together again. Have you all been well?”

Feyre’s eyes flash up at the question, but Nesta is quick to jump in. “I’m sure we’re all still adjusting, Mama.”

Elinor hums, Nesta’s fingers twitching and tensing in response to the disapproving sound. She has to shake the urge to trace that scar on the back of her hand again, that sound and what typically followed it still haunting and prickling in the back of Nesta’s mind.

“And what have we learned, hm?” Elinor continues, folding her hands neatly in front of her. “The rumors say that Rhysand’s numbers are beyond what we’ve been led to believe. Is it true? Are there more vampires than we know?”

“How would I know that, Mama?” Feyre sighs softly.

“You’re his wife now, are you not? And what about the wolves?” Elinor asks, her attention snapping to Nesta. “There’s long been stories of their training, of their strength.”

“I haven’t seen anything out of the ordinary with the pack,” Nesta explains, trying to hold her mother’s gaze but dropping her eyes to the dark swirls of her tea.

“And how about the Vanserras? And their coven’s spellbook?”

“I… I haven’t seen any spellbook, Mama,” Elain murmurs, her voice quiet.

Elinor sighs, and Nesta tries to brace for whatever is coming. “I give you girls everything that you need, set you and this family up, and this is what you offer me?”

“Mama…” Nesta starts, prepared to place herself in front of her sisters and in the line of fire with their mother if need be.

“You all have to be better. You’re Archeron women for the Mother’s sake.”

“Are we? Since you married us off,” Feyre mutters under her breath, but not quiet enough that their mother doesn’t hear.

“You insolent child,” Elinor seethes, turning her ire on her youngest daughter. “I am making you all stronger, ensuring you can take your birthright. And you’re ungrateful?” She takes a calming breath, smoothing out the lines of her skirts. “I expect you all to be better than this moving forward. At least I see you haven’t allowed the vampire bite, nor the wolf mating bite. That’s good. Elain?”

Elain’s grip on her skirts is near white-knuckled beneath the table, pink beginning to spill through her cheeks. With each second of silence that stretches around them, Nesta frowns in confusion, trying to surreptitiously reach toward her sister in comfort without their mother noticing.

“Elain,” Elinor repeats, her voice clipped.

Another tense moment passes, but then Elain slowly lifts her hands, placing them palm up on the table. The pink line across her left palm is unmistakable, still slightly puckered and not fully healed. A bonding spell, a witch’s equivalent of tying two souls together through blood and magic.

“I’m sorry, Mama,” Elain whispers, wincing when Elinor’s fingers curl around her wrist in a tight grip. “It was Eris. He insisted that Lucien and I do it.”

The response has Nesta even more confused. Elain has never been a particularly good liar, neither when they were girls and she was stealing cookies and sweets from the kitchen nor when they were teens and she was sneaking out to meet Graysen Nolan in town. And Nesta knows that Elain is lying now; although, she has no idea why.

“What were you thinking, Elain? This type of stupidity is beneath you.”

“Please, Mama. You’re hurting me.”

“Do you have any idea what this means? What you’ve done? You’re an Archeron, dammit, not some Vanserra’s tramp. Marriage or not, I will not have you tarnishing this family’s name.”

Elinor releases Elain’s wrist, crescent shaped indentations embedded in the skin from her nails. Elain clutches her hand back to her chest, cradling her wrist. Anger sparks and flares in Nesta’s chest in her sister’s defense. She glares across the table at their mother, but Elinor’s focus stays glued on Elain. The biting words sit heavy on the tip of Nesta’s tongue, poised and ready to fire without a second thought for the consequences, for what she knows it would mean to bring Elinor’s ire back her way.

As long as it’s off Elain and Feyre.

But before Nesta can say anything, Elinor pushes up to her feet. She looks down her nose at all three of her daughters, a cruel queen and her subjects. “Remember your place, remember what is expected of you as an Archeron, and do not fail me again.”

~ * * * ~

Nesta is quiet the entire carriage ride back to the pack’s village. She can feel Emerie’s curious gaze watching her from the seat across from her, but Nesta keeps her eyes firmly out the window. She watches the leaves and the trees shift and morph as they move past, her mother’s words, the whole morning, still playing over and over in her mind.

She’s an Archeron woman. A witch who comes from a long line of proud, powerful women. One of three sisters said to be blessed by the Mother herself. No matter that she’s a married woman now. No matter that she and Cassian may one day be amicable. No matter what the pack might one day mean to her. An Archeron is what her mother expects her to be, and Nesta will not fail her.

She will not be a failure again.

“Are you alright?” Emerie finally dares to break the quiet to ask. “You seem… tense.”

“I’m fine,” Nesta dismisses curtly. “Besides, you don’t need to worry about me.”

“You’re the alpha’s wife. You might be surprised, but that actually means something to me.”

The words take Nesta by surprise, and she turns her attention to the second, blinking a few times before remembering herself. “Thanks.”

Emerie shrugs like it’s easy, like it doesn’t mean anything, but it does to Nesta. It makes her feel like she may be less alone in the pack after all. She’s about to ask Emerie if she likes to read, to see if they may share any interests, but the carriage pulls to a stop. Emerie is quick to hop out, holding the door open for Nesta to step down as well.

“I promised Cresseida I’d relieve her from shop duty as soon as I got back,” Emerie explains, waving off the carriage. “You’ll be alright?”

“I’m fine.”

Emerie’s gaze sweeps over Nesta, like she doesn’t quite believe the words, but she doesn’t comment or say anything else. With a nod of her head, she heads toward the market square. Left alone, Nesta takes a moment for herself. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath in, allowing the scent of the trees and the moss around her to fill her senses. The peace this deep into the forest licks at her wounds in a soothing way she doesn’t expect, has that magic within her settling like a beast returning home.

Home.

Is that what this place is now? Between her grandmother and her mother, the Archeron manor certainly never truly felt like a home. Nesta has never really felt like she had a home, not a true one,at least. When she was younger, she used to read stories of sweeping romances and believed that she could find one just like the women between those pages. Her mother always said they were nothing more than fairytale dreams, always chastised her when she had her nose in those books.

Maybe that was one thing Elinor was right about.

Sighing softly to herself, Nesta rolls her shoulders and starts along the winding path through the village, back toward the alpha cabin on the top of the hill. When she pushes through the front door, she’s surprised to find Cassian standing in the kitchen. He looks just as surprised to see her, but then his expression changes, morphs into rage with the way his lips pull back in a snarl, the way his hazel eyes flare and narrow.

Nesta had almost forgotten about Cassian, certainly forgotten about their previous argument and the ward she’d placed around the cabin last night. She’d been too caught up in her mother and her sisters, between the disaster that was tea this morning. But it’s clear that Cassian hasn’t, and it all comes crashing back to Nesta as she takes in the way he’s glaring at her.

It’s the perfect distraction.

“I see you got yourself back inside after all,” Nesta comments idly, turning her back on him and removing her shoes and her cloak.

“We need to talk about last night.”

“What’s there to talk about? I thought it was rather fitting. Perhaps, we should build you a dog house.”

Nesta turns back around, offering her best saccharine smile, knowing it’s exactly the thing to get under his skin and fuel the fire. To draw out the pull to her push until they’re burning together and everything else fades away with those flames. But Cassian merely tilts his head, watching her in that unnerving way of his as though he can see right through her. It has Nesta’s hackles raising.

“Do you want to play, Nes?” Cassian drawls, taking slow, measured steps closer to her.

“Play? There’s no playing. You’re insufferable.”

“Insufferable? That’s weak, even for you.”

Nesta scowls up at him, daring to close that final step between them until they’re toe to toe. “Excuse me?”

“Oh, come on. Is that the worst you’ve got? I’ve been called much worse than that, sweetheart.”

“Like what?” Nesta asks, any other cutting words dying on her tongue.

“Offended on my behalf?” Cassian fires back, reaching a hand up between them to cradle her jaw, dragging his thumb across her bottom lip.

The teasing tone has the scowl returning in an instant, Nesta smacking his hand away. “Perhaps, I want to shake the person’s hand. Exchange ideas.”

“Ideas?” Cassian continues to tease, walking Nesta back until her back hits the wall.

“Yes. Ideas I could have shared in the pack meeting yesterday.”

Any teasing drops away completely from Cassian’s expression as he rolls his eyes. “Back to that, are we? It’s my pack, remember? Did you forget who the alpha is?”

“Did you forget I’m your wife? I should have been in that meeting.”

“Oh, you want to be my wife, now? How about you be a good little wife and get on your knees and suck my cock?”

The words are crude, all but snarled in her face, but that doesn’t seem to stop the way Nesta’s body responds. She still remembers that cock all too well. Remembers the way it had felt fucking into her. Remembers the way his knot had stretched her. Remembers the delicious ache between her thighs that remained for the entire next day.

But she’ll be damned if she lets Cassian know all that.

“Fuck you,” she snarls instead, shoving at his chest, but of course his large frame in unmoving.

“You’ve certainly forgotten how good a wolf’s sense of smell is,” Cassian tells her, leaning down over her with a cocksure smirk. “You think I can’t notice the sweet scent of your arousal? Do you want to suck my cock, sweetheart?”

“It’s clear you certainly want me to.”

Nesta shifts her hand, reaching down to grip Cassian’s cock through his pants. He hisses at the contact, but she can feel how he’s already half hard, can feel the way he twitches against her palm. It’s clear he’s getting off on their back and forth just as much as she is. She rubs her hand up and down, squeezing when she reaches the head of his cock.

Cassian continues to swell beneath her ministrations, and Nesta can’t help but lick her lips. How would the weight of him on her tongue feel? How would he taste? Just the thought has her clenching her thighs, desperate for friction, for relief, beneath the skirts of her dress. There’s a hunger yawning in the space between her ribs, clawing and gnawing at her chest, and she sees that same hunger echoes in Cassian’s own burning gaze, in his darkening hazel eyes.

“The no kissing rule still applies,” Nesta tells him, pulling her hand away so she can focus on the laces of her dress. “This is just sex.”

“Just sex,” Cassian agrees, reaching a hand back to fist in his shirt, tugging it up and off.

Nesta’s dress has barely hit the floor in a crumple of fabric before Cassian is pressing fully into her space. His hands find her thighs, fingers spread wide and digging into her skin, and he hauls her up off the ground with ease. He turns on his heel, only taking a few long strides before he deposits Nesta on the kitchen table, the wood pressing against her back.

Cassian takes his time roving his eyes over her, tracing down her throat and collarbones, lingering on her heaving chest and her peaked nipples, following down her stomach and between her spread legs. He dares to reach his hand forward, shadowing that same path with two fingers. It’s a spark catching, goosebumps erupting across Nesta’s skin as she arches up against that touch.

“So pretty flushed like this,” Cassian comments idly, using those same two fingers to toy with the waistband of her undergarments. “Good enough to eat.”

Cassian gathers up his hair in his hands, tugging it away from his face and securing it with a leather band, before he slowly drops down to his knees. His fingers curl around Nesta’s ankles, calluses along his palms sliding up her calves, over her knees, up her thighs. He pries her legs further apart, leaning in until even through the fabric separating them still, Nesta can feel the ghost of his hot breath against her cunt, until he can lick a thick line over the dampness that’s already gathered there.

Cassian groans softly, giving her cunt another lick. “And oh so sweet too. Who knew just the thought of sucking my cock would have you dripping already?”

His hands slide up over her hips, and Nesta can feel the heat of them scorching her skin. She can feel the hint of claws too, teasing and drawing a shudder up her spine. Would he fuck her with those claws? What would that feel like?

The sound of tearing fabric is almost too loud, even over Nesta’s panting breaths. She snaps her attention down just in time to watch what remains of her undergarments fall away. That cocksure grin of his is out in full force, hazel eyes glinting from between her thighs. Normally, Nesta would want to wipe that smirk clean off his face, but right now, all she can think about is the sight of him on his knees before her, about the blissful release that sight promises.

“Cassian,” Nesta whines instead, trying to buck her hips up against his hold. “Please.”

“What a good girl,” Cassian praises, mouthing along Nesta’s inner thigh and drawing a soft whimper from her lips. “Now, keep those eyes on me and keep moaning my name.”

The first slide of Cassian’s tongue against her cunt has Nesta gasping, thighs squeezing instinctively around the alpha’s head. Cassian groans against her, his mouth moving to her clit and tracing slow, tortuous circles over it. Nesta tries to keep her gaze firmly on him, but it feels almost unfair. His wide shoulders bracketed between her thighs, the shorter strands of hair falling out of his updo and along his temples, and his eyes…

His eyes glow golden as though the wolf within him has decided to join as well. As though Nesta truly is the prey caught in the predator’s trap. But she’s not sure she’d rather be anywhere else.

Cassian groans again, and then he really starts to devour her. He fucks his tongue up into her, curling and flicking it along her walls. Nesta feels like she’s burning, every nerve ending blazing and focused on where Cassian’s mouth works her higher and higher. Her feet scrabble desperately for some sort of purchase, against Cassian’s shoulders, against the edge of the table.

“Cass… Cassian… fuck.”

Nesta knows that she’s babbling, knows he’s turned her into a puddle of moans and canting hips, but she can’t find it within herself to care, not with the way he plays her body so well. She slides a hand down to Cassian’s head, holding him right where he is, the other finding her own breast to pinch and tweak her nipple in time with the movements of Cassian’s tongue.

Cassian focuses his attention back on her clit, and that fire blazes hotter until it swallows Nesta whole. Her back arches up fully off the kitchen table, fingers curling tight enough in Cassian’s hair that her nails bite into his scalp. She moans loudly as her release carries her right over the edge, trailing off into a whimper when Cassian continues to lap at her still fluttering cunt until he’s had his fill.

When Cassian finally pulls back, Nesta is forced to release her grip on his hair, her hand falling back to the table with a soft knock. His lips and chin glisten, and he makes a big show of sliding his tongue around his mouth and gathering up the excess. Nesta watches from beneath hooded eyes, that heat in her blood still simmering.

She pulls herself up into a seated position, reaching for the laces of Cassian’s pants. She makes quick work of the knot, pushing the fabric down until it slips from his hips and falls to his feet. Just the sight of his cock bobbing free has her thighs clenching again, has her swallowing hard and licking her lips. She eyes the vein that runs along the underside, the already weeping head, remembering exactly it’ll feel when she sinks back onto it.

Her legs are shaky as she slips off the kitchen table, but she’s able to guide Cassian back until he’s falling into one of the kitchen chairs. She sinks down onto her knees between his spread legs, sliding her hands up over his knees and along his thighs. She drags her nails along the skin, through the coarse hair lining his strong thighs, before finally curling her fingers around his cock, squeezing the base.

“Now this is a sight I could get used to,” Cassian comments, his hips bucking up against her grip. “A good girl on her knees before her husband, ready to take his cock so well.”

Nesta wants to roll her eyes at the words, but there’s no stopping the way her body responds to the praise. She decides to focus on the task at hand, leaning in and licking at the arousal dribbling from Cassian’s cockhead. She moans softly at the salty taste blooming across her tongue, opening her mouth wider to swallow him down. She slides her tongue along the underside, relaxing her throat to take as much as she can and working what she can’t with her hand. The weight of him in her mouth is exactly as unparalleled as Nesta imagined, and she moans around his cock as she starts to bob her head.

Tears start to prickle Nesta’s eyes, but she doesn’t let it deter her, blinking and peering up at Cassian through her eyelashes. His gaze is already pinned on her, lips parted and expression nothing short of enraptured. His dirty mouth is silent now. Nesta almost wishes she could smirk around the way her mouth is stuffed full. She may be the one on her knees, but it’s the pack alpha rendered powerless.

It goes right to her head and right to her cunt.

She widens her stance and dips her free hand between her own thighs. Her fingers slip through the wetness, and she teases her clit briefly before sinking two fingers into her cunt. She tries to match the pace of her fingers with the movements of her mouth, curling her fingers every time she swirls her tongue over the head of Cassian’s cock.

“Gods, look at you,” Cassian’s voice draws her attention back to him. “Go on, sweetheart. Add a third finger. Get yourself nice and ready to take my knot.”

Nesta whines around Cassian’s cock, but she does as she’s told. She presses in a third finger, fucking her cunt hard and desperately. Heat coils low in her gut, her thighs beginning to tremble, and when she dares to press her thumb against her clit, Nesta has to finally pull back from Cassian’s cock. She drops her forehead to his thigh, letting out a high pitched cry as her walls clench around her own fingers, her release making a mess of her own hand.

But still she wants more.

She’s not sure how she manages it, but she pushes back up to her feet. She moves to straddle Cassian’s lap, to finally take what she wants, but she barely gets a single knee up onto the kitchen chair. Cassian’s hand snaps to her throat, fingers pressed hard against her thundering pulse. Her cunt echoes the squeeze of his fingers, clenching around nothing desperately.

“Nice try, Nes,” Cassian leers up at her, keeping his hold of her as he stands up. “But I’m still the one in control here.”

He tightens his grip around her throat briefly, Nesta’s breath catching with the squeeze, before releasing it entirely. He spins her around, her back pressed firmly to his front and her hips digging into the edge of the kitchen table. She can feel his cock still hard and waiting, and Cassian shifts his own hips so that it slips between her thighs, dragging teasingly through the mess of wetness there, along her clit.

Cassian presses his lips to her ear, hot breath skittering across her skin. “Beg for it.”

“Please. Fuck me, please.”

Cassian groans at her words, but still, he doesn’t give her what she wants. His hand slides down her stomach, down between her thighs. He sinks two fingers into her dripping cunt, spreading them and stretching her wide, but it’s not enough. It’s not nearly enough. It’s nothing compared to the real stretch she knows he can give her.

“Do you want my cock, Nes?”

“Yes,” Nesta moans, tilting her hips back to grind more firmly against his cock. “And your knot. Please.”

Cassian’s teeth snag on her earlobe. “Good girl.”

Cassian pulls his fingers free, but Nesta barely has time to whine at the loss before he’s replacing them with his cock. Already, just the stretch of him has stars popping in Nesta’s vision, her cunt fluttering and clenching down around him as though desperate to draw him deeper still, to keep him right there. She feels so incredibly full, her toes curling against the hardwood of the cabin floor.

“Two orgasms already and you’re still so tight around me,” Cassian sighs, pressing between Nesta’s shoulder blades until she’s bent in half over the table. His hands find her ass, fingers digging in against the flesh. “But Mother save me, look at the way you take me so well.”

Nesta whimpers as Cassian pulls his hips back, the slow drag of his cock, but then Cassian is snapping his hips back forward. Again and again he drives into her, setting a hard and fast pace. It’s everything that Nesta needs. Every thrust that has him pressing deeper still, every slap of his hips against her ass, has Nesta keening. She claws at the kitchen table, desperate just for something to hold onto.

As that heat starts to lick up her spine again, her body coiling tighter and tighter like a bow string, Nesta reaches a hand between her hips and the table edge, fingertips trying to catch on her clit despite the jostling. A growl sounds from behind her, fingers curling around her wrist. Cassian yanks her hand away, pressing it to the table and holding it firmly there.

“You’ll come on my knot or not at all.”

It’s a threat and a promise.

Her entire body feels wrung out, but she doesn’t want him to stop. She hopes that he doesn’t stop. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, she knows she should feel embarrassed at this hunger that cloys in her gut, that flares through her chest, but she can’t find it within herself to care. She wants this. Wants him. Wants his knot.

Her throat feels hoarse with how much the male behind her has made her scream, but there’s no stopping the litany of moans that tumble past her lips. Especially when she starts to feel the swell of Cassian’s knot, feels it catching against the lips of her cunt with every forward thrust.

But he only seems to keep teasing her with it.

The next time that Cassian snaps his hips, Nesta presses her own back to meet him, forcing his knot to sink into her, to properly notch and lock them together.

“Fucking shit,” Cassian groans, dropping his head to her shoulder.

His hands grip Nesta’s hips hard enough to bruise, his cock twitching and flooding her core with warmth. The stretch of his knot, the feeling of being so completely and utterly full, is indescribable, and Nesta clenches down, milking his knot and his cock with a soft moan.

“Still want to be a good little wife, Nes?” Cassian asks, grasping her jaw and pulling her head back against his chest. “Then come all over your husband’s knot.”

His free hand slips down between her thighs, pressing hard against her clit. It’s all it takes for Nesta’s third release of the afternoon to tear through her. She all but screams Cassian’s name, her body trembling through the way his knot still presses against the walls of her cunt, the way she can still feel his cock twitching and filling her deep, the way he doesn’t relent with the rough circles he traces against her clit.

When Cassian releases his hold on her, Nesta is like a marionette with her strings cut, slumping down against the kitchen table with a soft whimper. Her chest heaves as she tries to catch her breath, tries to calm her thundering heart and come down from her high. With her cheek pressed to the table, breath puffing against the wood, Nesta allows her eyes to fall shut.

She and Cassian may never be the sort of husband and wife Nesta often dreamt of as a girl, will certainly never have the sort of love she read about in books, but at least they can have this.

—

Taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added or removed): @moodymelanist @nesquik-arccheron @sv0430 @talkfantasytome @bookstantrash @eirini-thaleia @ubigaia @fromthelibraryofemilyj @luivagr-blog @lifeisntafantasy @superspiritfestival @hiimheresworld @marigold-morelli @sweet-pea1 @emeriethevalkyriegirl @pyxxie @dustjacketmusings @hallway5 @dongjunma @glowing-stick-generation @melonsfantasyworld @lady-nestas @goddess-aelin @melphss @theladystardust @a-trifling-matter @blueunoias @kookskoocie @wolfnesta @blurredlamplight @hereforthenessian @skaixo @jmoonjones @burningsnowleopard @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk @ofduskanddreams @rarephloxes @thelovelymadone @books-books-books4ever @tenaciousdiplomatloverprune @that-little-red-head @readergalaxy @thesnugglingduck @kale-theteaqueen @tarquindaddy @superflurry @bri-loves-sunflowers @lady-winter-sunrise @witch-and-her-witcher @fieldofdaisiies @freakingata

#nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #acotar #acosf #nessian fanfiction #nessian fic #nesta x cassian #When We Howl #my fic

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elliesfavbae · 7 months ago

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Are you nervous, flower? - first kiss with Ellie, part 1

synopsis: Your more experienced at kissing best friend helps you out

Pairing: Ellie Williams x unexperienced!reader

warnings: just a fluff, my first fic too (how do i crop a pic)!

part two, part three

wc: ab 1500

It was a hot summer day. Like 32 degrees celsius outside. The sweet space of your room was no better. You were BOILING, everything sticking to your skin. Ellie could’ve said the same, sitting next to you in your room. It was like she was a part of your room’s scenery at this point, she was there almost all the time. You have been friends since you remember, spending every while with each other. Ellie recently broke up with her girlfriend and she was ranting about it:

“I let her be my girlfriend for two months for what?! So she can cheat on me WITH A MAN?” She emphasizes the last three words

It seemed like she wasn’t upset about losing her, just was frustrated she “wasted” so much time, as she describes it.

“I’m telling you, she wasn’t worth it” You try to comfort her. But the amount of times she has told you about her break up within the last week is uncountable, and you can’t think of any good responses anymore.

“Yeah, I know” Ellie rolls her eyes at your answer and groans, throwing her head back.

“It could’ve been worse though. Like, you could’ve been together for a year or something” You try again but it doesn’t seem to work well and Ellie sighs.

“Two months is a long period of time anyways. You don’t understand, you’ve never had a girlfriend” She whines, throwing herself next to you on your bed.

“Hey!” You throw a pillow at her. “I still have time”

“Okay, okay” She puts her hands up in a defensive gesture. She’s making fun of your lack of romantic relations whenever she can. “But you can do like, a lot of things in two months in a relationship“

“A lot of things? Like..?” You look at her, curiosity in your eyes as a thought occurs in your mind “Like… have you done the deed?”

“What? No! Ew, don’t say it like that” Another groan escapes Ellies’ lips and she hides her face in hands. “We just… Kissed. A lot. Unlike you” She smirks as she finds another reason to make fun of you.

You don’t say anything because you know it’s true. Yeah, you haven’t kissed anyone yet. It’s not like you didn’t want to, you just… Never had a chance.

“Actually, why have you never kissed?” She turns right to face you. There is no malice in her voice, just pure curiosity.

You drop your gaze down “I don’t know I just… I haven’t had a good opportunity, I guess?”

“Bullshit. If you wanted to do it, you’ve already done it. Seriously, with that pretty face of yours?” She jokingly strokes your cheek

Your gaze is still running away from Ellie’s inquisitive irises. Suddenly, it feels like the temperature just increased by another 32 degrees.

“I guess I am just too nervous to do it. I have, like, no idea how to kiss” You admit

A chuck escapes Ellie’s lips “Sorry, shouldn’t be laughing but it sounds ridiculous. You’ve never kissed because you don’t know how? Yet you don’t even want to try” Ellie really tries not to laugh but can’t help a giggle which she tries to cover with a cough

“It’s just not that easy as it sounds. Not for me” Though she is laughing, you don’t feel amused. You realized it’s true, you’re actually scared to kiss.

“Listen, I’m really sorry” The girl says when she sees your serious expression. Ellie puts her hand on your arm “What if someone… showed you?” Her lips curl into a playful smile

I finally let my gaze meet your eyes “Like a movie?” You awkwardly chuckle, trying not to jump to any conclusions.

“No dumbass, like a person would actually… teach you. Would that make you less nervous?” Ellie suddenly sounds kind and now it’s her gaze that runs away from your eyes.

I gulp. It’s obvious what Ellie means now “Like… you want to kiss me?” You ask, a ray of hope creeping into your voice

“No, I, uh. I don’t necessarily want to, I just want to be a good friend and help you out” She sounds so nervous all of a sudden.

“Well, yeah sure, you can steal my first kiss” I say sarcastically, but to be honest you actually want her to help me out.

“Alright, come here” Ellie’s confident again, she pats a space on your bed in front of her, inviting you to sit closer.

You take a deep breath as you change your position, fake yawning to check for bad breath hoping Ellie didn’t notice that. But she did.

“I don’t care about your breath, really” She chuckles again but it doesn’t sound annoying. Not anymore.

“It's not like I thought you would, I know you won't judge me and-” I start mumbling because of the nerves “fuck I don’t even know what I’m saying” I admit with a sigh and an awkward smile.

“Are you nervous, flower?” She brings her hands to your cheeks and gently strokes them and you feel dizzy as if the blood left your whole brain, but in reality it’s quite the opposite. A blush creeps on your cheeks. Ellie has never called you a name like that before.

“I promise it will feel nice” Your best friend half-whispers and you feel like the whole world is spinning. You must have a real stupid look on your face but you don’t even care at this moment.

“So,” she starts “It’s all about what you do before the kiss” She puts her hands down and looks you into the eyes. Then her gaze lands on your mouth and your eyes again.

“You should look them into the eyes, at their lips, and into the eyes again.” She bites her lip “Extra points if you do that.” You are so lost in this moment you don’t really listen to her anymore. You can smell her cologne and shower gel. You can feel how hard your heart is pumping, too.

“And if you’re bold enough” She stops to bring her hand to your ear and she tucks a strand of hair behind it “You can do this. Trust me, it works” But you’re a living proof it works, as well as the damp spot on your underwear is.

“So? Are you ready?”

At first, you forget words in your throat. You clear it, and answer, your voice just a whisper “...Yeah”

She puts her hands on your cheeks once again and pulls you closer. You watch as she closes her eyes, so you do the same. And then you feel her lips on yours. It doesn’t feel like you imagined, it’s wet and slippery. But she was right, it feels really nice. She sucks gently on your lower lip, tilting her head, so you do the same to her upper lip. You feel so many things at once, yet you feel numb at the same time. Butterflies in your stomach going crazy, the smell of her warm skin, soft lips against yours, confident fingers holding your cheeks, her saliva mixing with yours, throbbing between your legs. The only sound in the room is this wet kissing sound you are making and your heartbeat. And, did you hear that right, a whimper from Ellie? The kiss lasted about five seconds, but it felt like eternity to you.

Ellie pulls away from the kiss. She keeps her hands on your face and you already miss her soft lips.

“So? How did your first kiss feel?” That’s all she says as if nothing has happened. As if she didn’t just kiss her best friend for the first time.

You touch your lips with your fingers, like you are checking if it actually happened. You are speechless at first, but finally manage to say something, it doesn’t even make sense. “Wow.. It was.. thanks Ellie”

“What?” She furrows her eyebrows with a smirk on her lips. “Um, you want advice? Another try? Anything?” She suggests, slightly amused by your reaction

“Yeah, right, advice or kiss me again or something” You start mumbling again

“I would say… Just don’t tilt your head so much. And don’t stress, princess.” She does it again, calls you a name that makes your face red “But to be honest, it was adorable how nervous you were.”

You finally regain your attitude but your voice is still low. You roll your eyes at her “So… Can you kiss me again?”

pics credits on pinterest: ambar, vic

#ellie williams #tlou ellie #ellie tlou2 #ellie williams best friend #ellie willams x reader #girls kissing girls #pride month #sit on my face ellie #ellie williams first kiss #first kiss #fic #fluff #ellie williams fluff #small series

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garoujo · 2 years ago

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✩ ˛˚ . HANMA SHUJI ; — you basically emptied your bank account to finally see your favourite band BONTEN in concert, although the bassist wants to make sure you have a night to remember.

warnings: f!reader, bassist!shuji, band!au, other members mentioned, exhibitionism, some choking, biting, backstage scenes, this was written with pure hormones so it’s v messy + wild. note: i am back and as crazy as ever <3 i’ve had this in my drafts 4 months plz forgive me !

fuck, you’d waited too long for this moment — to finally see them, be in their presence and be able to admire your favourite band up close, this close. but nothing could’ve prepared you for how pretty BONTEN actually were, all those interviews and fan videos barely did them justice with the true beauty they exuded on stage, in their domain.

you’d basically scraped the bottom of your savings for this ticket and you didn’t regret it one bit, you’re so close you can see the glisten of sweat along the lead singer mikey’s chest beneath his low cut shirt. rindou mans the drums while his brother ran takes the keyboard, violet rays and handsomely, teasing smirks everytime they clock a particularly pretty thing losing their mind in the crowd.

lead guitar is a particularly unpredictable one, pastel pink mullet in contrast to the rest of sanzu’s sharp features but it suits him you think, frames his bright eyes despite the dark grin that accompanies his scarred cheeks — he was pretty, proven by his even more crazed fan base — he liked it though. although as pretty as the rest of the group are, they’re not why you’re here though, he is.

hanma shuji, bonten’s bassist and fuck— is he a force to be reckoned with, black kanji across his skin and you don’t think sin and punishment have ever looked as good as they do when they’re paired with his smirk and black and blonde hair. there’s temptation in his amber gaze and you swear you feel electricity lick at the base of your spine when you meet it in the crowd, watching the way his grin tugs even wider as his long fingers toy with the strings.

its those same fingers that are working you open now as he presses you against one of the speakers in the back, you’d heard rumours about how bonten in particular liked to fuck with their groupies, maybe that’s why you’d opted for a particularly short skirt for their gig — but fuck, were you feeling lucky when you’d been invited back stage to ‘meet the band.’

you’re not sure if it’s the adrenaline from the set or the particular expertise of hanma’s fingers pressing into you that already has you so wet, every loud squelch from your pussy seems to echo even louder than the last as you shake and every whimpery, sweet little whine only makes the bassist over you hum out a laugh as he nibbles on the shell of your ear.

“oh you’re a big fan, ain’t ya, babydoll? should put this pretty face centre stage, the crowd would love you.. yeah?” his voice is a honeyed, low drawl and you swear it only makes you feel even better when it’s accompanied by his lips smearing along your skin.

you can feel the still damp graze of hanma’s hair along your neck, still wet with sweat from the set as he accompanies the next particularly deep kiss of his fingers with a searing bite of his teeth along your pulse point.

you could cry with how insane he feels already, embarrassingly so as you grab and scratch at his shoulders — trying so hard to swallow down the pretty little moans that he’s pulling from you so easily. he had a reputation for being an adrenaline junkie, seeking out thrills — but you didn’t think that also included him fucking a fan behind some flimsy curtain when he has a perfectly secluded dressing room.

your head drops back as you feel hanma’s free hand curl around the base of your throat, squeezing lightly before he’s pulling back to let his dark, lidded gaze sweep over your already fucked out features.

“don’t fuckin’ hold back on me, fuck sake— you’re already this wet, don’t make me pull those pretty sounds out of you.” he grits despite the way the corners of his lips curl into something dark, taunting when he pulls his fingers out of you with a click of his tongue.

“im all tired from my set, babydoll. you gonna help me out?” hanma goads, teases as he lets his eyes drop to his belt and the particularly noticeable bulge in his pants — chuckling when just the loss of his touch pulls a sweet little whine from your pouty lips.

you know what he wants, and you’re so eager to give it to him — to reach forward and let your fingers work eagerly with the buckle of his belt until you’re able to peel back the layers. a quiet little gasp falling from you when the weight of his heavy cock finally presses bare against your thigh.

you’re basically fucking begging him to just hurry up and fuck you already when you send him a doe-eyed look, thighs twitching when he rubs a few sticky circles into your clit before hes pushing himself closer to you with a growl. your ears feel like they’re ringing with want as it drowns out the footsteps of the staff and leftover fans that still shuffle around on the floor, begging to get a peak at the members backstage and you feel like a fucking vip with the view you have right now.

hanma’s slender fingers in sin wrap around the base before he’s letting his head roll back with a few rough strokes of his palm, pinning your hips against the rough surface below you as he leans over your figure to rub his cock along your slick folds.

you’re fucking soaked, feeling the first silky grind of his cock split through the petals of your cunt before it’s catching on your clit, making you both gasp and moan at the wet tacky sound that follows before it’s drowned out by a swooning, loud cheer from the leftover crowd outside. you jump slightly as it rings, but relax when it’s followed by a particularly smooth voice, most likely belonging to one of the haitani’s as they entertain the leftovers, basking in the way they’re basically begging to be dragged backstage — to be in your position.

you feel hanma’s palm press hard against your throat when your legs curl around his waist, bringing your attention back to him as you pull him close. he pushes you so deep against the speaker your back arches as he finally splits through your folds and sinks into you with a shameless, low groan — chuckling at the way you’re already twitching around him, taking him so well he’s already considering dragging your sweet little pussy around the country with him.

“wanna show ‘em all how well you take me? you’d break their fragile lil hearts, such a selfish lil thing.”

#݁ . ࿓ : sealed#this is queued so plz post sob !#tokyo rev x reader #tokyo rev smut #tokyo revengers smut #tokyorev x reader #tokyorev x you #tokyo revengers x you #tokyorev smut #tokyo rev x you #tokyo revengers x reader #hanma x reader #hanma smut #hanma x you #hanma shuuji x you #hanma shuuji smut #hanma shuuji x reader

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ephemerallovesong · 1 year ago

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Rooftop [HSR Blade x Reader headcanons]

Sometimes life gets so hard that you want to end it all. It seems as if the world around is losing all its colors. But he knows what it's like to wish for death. And he won't let you leave him. Pairing: Blade x gn!reader

CW/TW: heavy topics, reader is really depressed and suicidal, attempt to end life. Do NOT interact if this can trigger you.

A/n: I'm in a depressive episode again and can't visit my psychotherapist right now, so here some comforting HCs. Please, talk with a specialist if you have problems with mental health, you are strong and everything's going to be alright. Not proofread, as a non-native english speaker I'm sorry for any mistakes.

◈ You have always been a ray of sunshine in Blade's life ever since you both met. Even if he didn't talk about it openly. Your care for him made him feel something warm again other than an all-consuming emptiness inside. ◈ But sometimes even the brightest sunny day can be overshadowed by clouds. ◈ You were especially cheerful that evening. So much so that it became suspicious. Especially when Blade noticed how empty and tired your eyes were despite your smile. ◈ You tried not to talk about your depression with other people. Jokes here and there, nothing more. Although Blade still noticed it. And he was worried. Although it was hard to tell from his cold and neutral expression. ◈ "Blade, promise me something? Promise that you can find something good in this life, no matter what." you said with a warm, yet slightly sad smile. ◈ But he has already found it. You. ◈ He just looked at you silently for a while before simply nodding. Your phrase was even more suspicious than your behavior. ◈ And then you left. ◈ But intuition told Blade that something was clearly wrong. He hesitated for a while before following you. Quiet, like a cat on the hunt. ◈ You went up to the roof. ◈ At first it looked like simple stargazing. You stood there and looked up at the dark sky. A light breeze gently ruffled your hair. ◈ "I am so sorry. I'm really sorry. I can't take it anymore." you mumbled to yourself. And there was silence. ◈ But as you confidently walked towards the edge of the roof with a heavy sigh, Blade broke this silence and rushed towards you. He understood what exactly you wanted to do. And he couldn't let that happen. ◈ You barely got your foot over the edge when he grabbed your arm and pulled you closer to him. His heart was pounding wildly in his chest. ◈ "Wh... What?" there was so much confusion and despair in your voice as you were pressed against his chest. "No! No! Let me go! Let me go!" ◈ You've already made up your mind and you can't back out. But Blade held you tightly in his arms. ◈ You cried and screamed and tried to break free from his grip, but it was useless. Your own heart felt like it was about to jump out of your chest. ◈ "I can't let you go." Blade's voice is barely above a whisper. "Not now. Never." ◈ He tightly held your waist with one hand while he stroked your head with the other. You trembled and sobbed and tried to fight. ◈ As soon as you start to sink to the floor Blade dropped down with you. You cried and he held you in his arms as tightly as he could. The thoughts in his head raced at the speed of light. It felt like it wasn't really happening. He could lose you. No. This cannot happen. ◈ With every minute your crying became quieter, and the struggle was weaker. Until you finally go limp in his arms, breathing heavily. ◈ "I'm here. I'm with you. Everything will be all right." his voice was still quiet, he continued to stroke your hair. "I understand how you feel. Like no one else. But (Y/N), I won't let you leave me." ◈ He should have noticed earlier that something was wrong with you. So that it doesn't get to this point. ◈ But he was glad that he listened to his intuition and got here in time. ◈ "You told me to find something good in this life. But I almost lost it. I almost lost you, (Y/N). You are the most valuable thing in my life." ◈ You fell completly silent as you listened to his words. ◈ "Please, I can't lose you. I do not want to lose you."

#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #hsr blade #blade x reader #star rail #hsr #blade #hsr blade x reader #blade x y/n #blade x you

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look-at-the-soul · 2 years ago

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The one

Modern Tommy Shelby x reader

A/N congratulations @toms-cherry-trees on 1.5K followers! 👏🏻✨🎉🥳🙌🏻 you deserve that and many many more!! So I wrote this little piece for you, I hope you enjoy it, the idea came to my mind as the perfect match for your autumn theme when I saw this moodboard @acewritesfics created (I know you did it for Cillian + cottage Ace, but since I have that idea very similar in my The Photoshoot series, I took it as inspiration for a modern Tommy ☺️)

Patting around the bed to find the solid body she loved the most, but all Y/N could find was emptiness.

She couldn’t love this place more, the birds were chirping outside, the fresh air was too good to be true, no cellphone signal… if only she could find Tommy.

“Good morning beautiful.” He praised from the bedroom door, stepping in with a tray full of coffee, fruit and toast.

“I woke up and you weren’t here.” She pouted covering her upper body with the sheets.

“But I am now.” He replied placing the tray over her legs, taking one long look at her disheveled hair, tangled from all the times he ran his fingers through it the previous night. Her naked form covered only by the ivory sheets.

This was the closest to a vacation she could afford right now, not because money was a problem, but because Tommy had been extremely busy with his business and she knew asking for a five day or a week holiday would drive him mad, so a weekend at a small cottage was a luxury she couldn’t miss.

Everything had been perfect since they arrived; the lovely weather, the scent of nature, the calmness vs the caos in the city. She loved specially the dead leaves crunching beneath her feet as they took a long walk the previous day.

“It was a good idea to bring that small coffee machine.” Tommy chuckled realizing how little things they had there, no tv, no wifi, there was a small old fashioned fireplace that luckily still worked and he lit it as it started to get chilly last night.

“Told you it was a good investment.”

“I thought we’d have one… guess I was wrong.”

“Yeah same reason why you brought your iPad too.”

Tommy stole a strawberry from the bowl. “Uhu, I really can’t believe there’s no access to technology around.”

“Don’t complain, we’ve hot water and power light.”

Tommy’s eyes sparkled suddenly. “And the best part is… I‘ve you all to myself.”

Y/N’s body tingled just by his voice and the way he was looking at her.

Closing her legs instinctively, she observed her boyfriend place the tray on the dresser.

“You think that’s going to stop me?” He arched an eyebrow cockily at the same time he took one of her legs to drop a kiss on her ankle, starting a trail of feather-like kisses all over her skin, making Y/N discover the soft spot behind her knee that she didn’t know it existed and how much it was turning her on.

She sighed content letting Tommy throw the covers aside.

****

It was a lovely Autumn day, her favorite season, the colors, the trees losing their leaves, the smell, she could swear the atmosphere was different.

Perhaps what really made a difference was watching Tommy so calm with a high energy and an endless smile on his face. Turning around, she found the last rays of sunshine kissing his skin, every freckle and the reflection in the lake in front of them making his blue eyes sparkle even more.

He wasn’t wearing his signature immaculate three piece suit, but a white t-shirt covered by a denim jacket and black jeans, he looked like a totally different person, looking at him made her heart skip a beat, just like the first time.

“Whot?” He frowned.

“You look different.” Y/N pointed out. “Happier.”

“Well I’ve everything I want right now, that surely is a motive.” Tommy admitted kissing her hair.

His surprise grew even more when he saw Y/N pulling out a blanket from the basket she demanded to bring to their stroll.

“Don’t stand there watching, help me!” She shot him a look, placing her side on the grass.

“So bossy.” Tommy chuckled, relaxing his body finally over the blanket, pulling her towards him moments later.

He tried to suppress a chuckle when he saw her placing a bottle of wine and two glasses between them, she was always extra when packing.

“Oh, do I hear someone complaining?” She laughed.

In silence, his mind wandered to think how grateful he really was for Ada insisting over and over for him to try out one of those ridiculous dating apps, after being extremely picky about the prospects showing up in his cellphone, he stopped when he found Y/N’s profile.

Matching her right away, the conversation was flowing naturally, they simply clicked and agreed to meet the following week.

She wasn’t just eye catching physically, her interests caught his attention, she was a lawyer and worked at her own firm, had a good taste in music and books, she loved to fight for human rights. And when they first met in person, he knew she wasn’t just good looking, she had a brain, an interesting conversation and she could keep up with his wicked sense of humor surprisingly well. He was surprised how the conversation never seemed to die with Y/N.

The romance took off immediately, date after date, they discovered new things about the other one, Tommy particularly loved the moment she arrived at her apartment, kicking her high heels while he poured some wine as she stretched her legs on the couch. By now he had lost count of how many skirts and dresses she owned, but he knew she wore a different outfit to every trial.

Now they were both wearing casual outfits, comfortable shoes and she added a light scarf around her neck, both completely out of their elements.

Tommy leaned on his back enjoying not having everyone bothering every three minutes, the silence, peace, not feeling anxious about his next meeting or the papers piling up to sign on his desk, the atmosphere calm, he even took several minutes admiring the sighting… not every day he got to have all of that.

“Did you fall asleep?” Y/N whispered nudging her nose against his cheek.

“No, I’m just relaxing as you said I should.” He confessed opening one eye to look at her.

The autumn breeze made a chill run up and down her back, instinctively Tommy’s hand started caressing over the jumper as if he had been able to feel it. He was lying down on his back. This was the prettiest sunset she had ever seen, the lake catching the reflection of the sky, copying the oranges tones, as well as the incredible trees before her eyes, it looked like it was taken out of professional photograph.

Closing the novel she had been reading, Y/N turned around and rested an arm and head on his torso, adapting to the calm rhythm of his breathing. Taking in the scar on his chin, she wondered how he got it.

“I can feel you staring.” He stated with his eyes closed, hidden under his Ray Bans.

“Just admiring the view,” she admitted, “and the calmness.”

A smile started forming on his lips, but he didn’t move from his position, loving the way her body felt against his.

“I can’t remember the last time I took a day off.”

Y/N chuckled switching her position to lay down next to him. “That’s exactly why I suggested it. You needed to relax.”

“I was relaxed.” He defended quickly.

“Ugh you can be so stubborn sometimes, you were under so much stress, it wasn’t fun to be around.”

In mere seconds, Tommy pinned Y/N under his body.

She squealed and tried to kick her legs while he was holding his weight on his arms to not crush her down.

“Oh let me show ya how much fun I can be.” He adviced with a smirk, grinding against her sweet body, changing completely the atmosphere.

“This is dangerous… and wild.”

Apart from the cottage and the very few villages at the other side of the lake, they were practically on their own.

“No one is around.” He answered playfully looking from left to right, attacking Y/N’s neck afterwards.

A wave of electricity ran through every nerve in her body. Deep down she knew this was a side of him that not all the people got to see, and it wasn’t really so frequent.

“But… you’ll have to be on top darling, I’m not getting any younger.” Tommy joked resuming his previous position.

“I don’t ever want to go back to the city.” Y/N murmured as they snuggled, loving their surroundings close to the cottage. “Look at you. Who would’ve thought you would end up enjoying this?”

“I’m a man full of surprises, love.”

His hand sneaked around her waist, bringing her body above his.

Y/N giggled, but let him pull her closer, Tommy loved that look on her as the sun about to go down shone through her.

“Oh Mr. Surprises I think we should rent this Airbnb more often.” She absolutely fell in love with the cottage and everything around it. It was small, cozy and had everything they needed.

Tommy cleared his throat. “Speaking of Airbnb…” he took in her beauty for an instant, “when we go back to the city, I’m planing to make an offer for the place.”

Y/N looked at him with shock written all over her face.

“What? Why?”

“Because I love how happy you look.”

Her smile grew and the space in her face wasn’t enough to hold it. “Tommy!”

He felt her smile against his lips as they kissed, but soon she moved away from his body to wrap a cardigan around her shoulders.

“And I also think it’s time you meet my son, Charlie… and the rest of my family.”

Before Y/N could answer something, Tommy continued. “I know we said we’d take it slow, but we’ve been dating for a while and you already know I’m deadly serious about this, why waste time?” He shuddered. “My sister specially has been very adamant to meet you.”

“Woah, you really want to make this official?”

Tommy nodded.

“I couldn’t feel more sure about us, since the moment I saw you walking into the restaurant that first time I thought shit, this is it, this is the one for me.”

“I’m so glad you sent that first message, I had decided earlier I’d give up looking and close the app.” Y/N ran her hands up and down his chest.

His knuckles caressing her cheek.

“Tell me about Charlie.” She asked. Eyelids half closed from his delicate touch.

And now it was his turn to smile because he absolutely knew she was the one.

***

A/N one of my friends just met her bf through a dating app and I’ve never seen her happier, so I got the inspiration from there! Kat I hope you never see this 😂🤣

Master list

Tag list: @lyarr24 @runnning-outof-time @cillmequick @gypsy-girl-08 @datewithgianni @cloudofdisney @gretelshelby @ange-thoughts @lespendy @onlydeadcells @fastfan @stevie75 @thenattitude @prettylittlehoneyeyesxoxo @esposadomd @allie131313 @imichelle-l-rigby @winchestergirl22 @already-broken144 @strayrockette @forbidden-forest-witch @elenavampire21 @forgottenpeakywriter @zablife @heidimoreton @peakyscillian @shaddixlife @moral-terpitude @babaohhhriley @shelbydelrey @sloanexx @cilliansangel @rangerelik @sydneyyyya @adaydreamaway08 @dandelionprints @thomashelbyswife

#That’s what Cill said #tommy Shelby #modern tommy shelby imagine #modern Tommy shelby #thomas shelby #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby x you #tommy shelby fanfiction #modern peaky blinders #cillian murphy x tommy shelby

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