#<- for the people that spell it like that (for some reason)

[olderthannetfic]

I accidentally killed my own desire to write, and I need some advice. To be really blunt about it, what's the point of writing? When I would spend lots of time laboring over making a good story with a plot and characters who were in-character and connecting all the dots narratively so payoffs were satisfying, my reward was dead silence and virtually no clicks. I posted some mindless smut to my side account one day and got more hits in a day than most of my other works combined got in a year. I know, I know. "Write for ~*~yourself~*~" is the common response. It's the "be yourself!" of writing. It's supposed to be a magical phrase that'll make everything okay. But... I don't like knowing that something I spend months working on won't be read by anyone while something I write in a car while bored got thousands of clicks. I don't like making something I'm proud of and then no one ever looks at it. That's not fun for me. It's not fulfilling.

For a solid decade, I've tried to ignore how the level of interactivity in fandom is falling. Fewer comments. Fewer kudos. No comments in the bookmarks. You put your tumblr and Discord in the AN and get a handful of asks and one person who adds you, talks to you twice and then ghosts you. Most of the comments are "well, actuallys", made even more annoying by them being wrong as opposed to actually correcting an error. I avoid fandom drama, wank, and infighting. I don't engage with things I know will make me unhappy. I try to be happy over in my own little corner. I comment on every single work I read. I want people to enjoy fandom. I used to.

Some dumb smut I wrote in 40 minutes gets five times the hits of the writing I'm most proud of, and it gets it in just under three months. I am not a great smut writer. I haven't stumbled onto an incredible talent I had that makes it so the issue is that I'm so amazing my smut brings all the boys to the yard. People just don't like what I write and put effort into. It's very likely that despite 20 years of writing fic, I suck at writing. And people enjoy my writing most when they don't have to put up with anything substantial and can just skip to the sex.

So for the last eight months, when I write, I just sort of give up. Close the Word doc without saving. No one will read this. No one cares about this. There is no fan eagerly awaiting every update like I await updates from my favorite authors. There's not even someone saying, "update soon!" Close the Word doc. Delete old WIPs. There's no point. I do not tell stories worth reading. I used to. In the FFN days people genuinely enjoyed my work. I'd never have had an opportunity to do the 'I won't update until I get 3 reviews' thing because getting that many on a chapter was usually something I'd do overnight. Post before bed. Wake up. Read the reviews before school. I peaked in high school, I guess.

And now I'm just sort of lost. I still have lots of ideas. Ideas for fics fall into my head all the time. That's never been a problem. What I don't have is any motivation to write them. What's the point of writing? If no one else is reading, I guess the point would be so I could go back and read my own story and have fun with it. Write for myself. But I can review the story and have fun with it in my head without writing it down. It's substantially faster and more importantly, isn't incredibly depressing.

So, at the risk of definitely being calld the second-coming of True Art Anon or a troll or validation-seeking or haha mentally ill haha... what's the point of writing?

--

Okay, so write porn in a car while you're bored.

Look, you can whine all you want about my response, but what you've written here is blatantly about depression.

Lots of people in fandom are still interacting. And no, it isn't just on fics that are objectively written to some pro fiction standard or whatever. Teenagers still breathlessly review poorly spelled cracky masterpieces about this year's big anime and so forth.

Yes, there may be reasons why you in particular are in a slump when it comes to fandom friendships or "plz update" comments. We can talk about that. But this ask is all gloom about fandom in general. That's not realism: that's you having a problem.

--

As for why a person should write: because the actual hours you spend doing the writing are fun.

If they aren't pleasurable in some way, find another hobby.

--

But if you want an answer to the age old "Why did my 5 minute fic get 1000000x more asspats", I've seen meta about this for literally decades.

The most likely reason is that the fic we write quickly and without much thought often feels fresher and more fun. The things we labor over endlessly can feel overworked. Even in cases where they don't, they're often heavier subject matter or more niche subject matter. On top of all that, we just care more, so even a high level of feedback doesn't really feel like enough for the effort and care we put in.

--

Do you really need me to tell you why you don't feel the same as in high school when things were fresh and new?

Go read up on combatting burnout or dealing with post-college anxiety or managing stress in a dead-end job in your 30s or finding meaning in your 40s or whatever is going on.

Everyone goes through fallow periods in fandom and in life.

Feeling reinvigorated has to do with internal factors and some general life circumstance stuff. It doesn't have that much to do with number of kudos. That's just the surface trigger for a mood that was already there.

[raayllum]

Moon Arcanum Callum + Sun Arcanum Claudia in S7?

Callum getting the Moon arcanum has been a fandom... not theory, but shall we say, prospect, since even before S4. Some of this was because of the seeming set up in previous seasons, such as:

Callum having a hunch that the cube wasn't glowing due to the Moon, and being our first hint at illusions on the Cursed Caldera (1x09)

Lujanne explaining the secret of the arcanum (as she understands it) to him in 2x02

Callum doing moon arcanum spells (3x08, Through the Moon) much the way he did Sky spells before unlocking that arcanum

Callum employing aspects of the Moon arcanum in his plans (3x01 with tricking Sol Regem, creating the illusion pearl in 6x01)

His growing relationship and understanding with Rayla, and potential involvement with her family/village

But especially:

This is of course already reflected in spades in his arc as a mage. Everyone, Lujanne included, believes that humans can't do magic. She treats this as absolute fact and destiny, but Callum perceives it as subjective truth; why can't he just make his own connection and do magic anyway? And in doing so, he changes the world. He creates a radically new, better reality.

With season seven's synopsis on sacrifice and life and death, both things we see tied heavily to Moonshadow culture and the Moon itself, I could see Callum connecting to the Moon arcanum next season for a few reasons (and potentially Claudia with the Sun arcanum, which I'll get to after). So let's get into it.

Precursor

Previously, if Callum was going to connect to the Moon arcanum, I'd speculated it'd mostly be around ideas of the consistency of Love (light or dark, the moon is always the moon) and his love for Rayla being his light in the darkness / the one constant truth of his life. I don't think this anymore, obviously, because we got all those things through the Star truth light ritual beat for beat and we're not going to be repeating, but I did think it'd be worthwhile then to revisit what a Moon arcanum could mean for Callum under new context / emotional epiphanies. I've also always thought either Earth or Sun would suit Claudia, but leaned more towards the latter, so we're gonna talk about that, too.

Truth and Lies and Aaravos

As Lujanne explains in 2x02, the Moon arcanum is understanding the true nature of the relationship between appearances and reality, and we can only understand the appearance itself. This feels like a very fitting idea to come back to with Aaravos, who ostensibly never lies but routinely withholds or presents not entirely correct information. "How may I serve you?" when you're just going to be a pawn. Not telling a mourning Claudia that he was indeed the one who killed Viren so that she'll continue to do his bidding, with Claudia asserting that Aaravos "didn't lie" about the ritual in 6x01, and he didn't. We also see him wield the truth as a weapon with people like Khessa ("would you like to know the truth of her fate before you meet yours?") and Sol Regem (more on that here.)

Everything that he says is truth to him, and then he lifts it up as being objectively true (i.e. you're destined to play into my hands) even when it isn't necessarily true. We can also see Callum veering into mindsets that Claudia and Viren have had, where he believes he's past the point of saving ("I'm ruined, it's too late for me" "Promise me you'll kill me") or removing his own agency by admission ("Finnegrin was going to kill you, I didn't have a choice" / "Every step forward is a choice").

Callum understanding Aaravos' or others' actual truths versus their lies and the ones he's believing could be very fitting in S6, especially if he might be learning more about the existence of the Cosmic Council and who made their world the way it is. I think his existence may help lead to that "slow spiral of chaos" but that it won't be just or even Bad at all the way they'd feared, etc.

Claudia is also linked to lies and truth. She lies to others, but Aaravos notes that "If you tell the truth you will lose her," and she goes looking for her own deep truth in S6, but doesn't seem to fully find it. Terry asks her "What do you need to find your one deep truth?" and Claudia says that she needs her dad, but she and her mother have also made it clear that she "needed to stay with Soren" and her family (vs Viren telling her to pick the egg over Soren). With Viren gone and Aaravos manipulating her, Soren could easily be one of her guiding lights next season or in future seasons.

The Pearl

The moon is analogous, framing/appearance wise, to the prison. This is alluded to in 5x09 through framing, and then made even more direct in 6x09: Aaravos escapes his prison thanks to Claudia and (unbeknownst to her) she has become the prisoner, much like how Callum may physically free himself from chains in 5x08 but magically/emotionally chains himself further to Aaravos, or Viren shouting while in chains that he's finally free of the dark puppetmaster.

Basically, when Callum says in 6x01 that he's inside the pearl, I don't think (as of S6 / probably first half of S7 at least) that he's ever gotten out of it. Aaravos uses him even after his nightmare, and we know thanks to the pawn intro that Aaravos' final machinations for Callum also haven't yet come to play. I've been wondering if the Aaravos intro is going to change in S7, since he's out of his prison — and it still may — but if we look at it from the angle of Callum and Claudia both being stuck within the moon/pearl rather than just Aaravos himself, maybe it could stay.

And if Callum is stuck inside the moon-pearl, shattering it by understanding the arcanum ("the whole world is like a giant primal stone, and we're inside of it, and it's also in us") and/or with Claudia moving to the opposite of the moon could be useful, especially since Karim is a corrupted sun in his own way. Speaking of which let's talk about

Light and Dark

We know thanks to Claudia that black and white, or light and dark, are not always clear cut. Her hair thanks to her dark magic use changes like phases of the moon, with the light being bad and the dark being good. Conversely, her path is a dark one with the path of truth and light being withheld from her. In a similar manner, we see Callum's light (Rayla) being what led him into dark magic use and what led him out of it, and will likely see this pattern play out again. Aaravos is a representation of a path of darkness, but we also see the cube flashing a bright light in the pawn intro, tying light and darkness together for him as well.

Callum's understanding of himself that he gained through the Ocean arcanum can not simply become untrue or disappear, so I think recognizing that darkness isn't all he is ("I'm ruined" / "your heart's not full of darkness" "Neither is yours") even if there are dark parts of him and of his life would be fitting. It also seems that could be helpful with Claudia as well, and even characters like Ezran, who will have to wrestle with darker parts of his emotions/personality next season as well with Runaan. They've all got light and dark inside them, and learning how to walk in that balance and still break away from the Cycle / Aaravos is useful. As Ezran said in 4x03:

I just want to yell stop. But that’s not enough. It won’t work. I think about a positive vision, a faith we can all share, that we might build a future together in hope. A future where we can be safe with each other.  But… It’s not that easy or simple. Because people are still hurting and they are still angry. We can’t ignore that, or pretend it will go away. Somehow, we have to hold it all in our hearts at the same time. We have to acknowledge the weight of the pain and loss, but open up our eyes and allow ourselves to hope and maybe forgive and love again. We have to give today’s children a chance to inherit a future filled with peace. To give them that, we have to hold pain and love in our hearts at the same time.

Claudia's love for her family led her to ruin, but it can also save her through Soren. Callum's love for Rayla led him to ruin, but it has also saved him (and again, we'll likely repeat this pattern). Ezran's love for his father will lead him to anger but also pull him out of it, just as Viren's love for his son caused him to begin his journey of terrible things, but also guided him to do one final, truly right thing by the end.

Love is light and dark. Claudia, who's been walking in shadow, needs the full light - the sun, in the form of her brother. She needs to accept and see the truth of what's happening and step fully into the light. Callum, who has been routinely worried of the dark within him, needs to the reminder that he's not all he is, that he has light of his own inside. In doing so, he can break Aaravos' control over him and give hope to any other dark mages / humans in general that no level of corruption is too late to come back from, and that there is always light amid the darkness.

Life and Death

The stakes have never been higher as Aaravos and Claudia are on the warpath, determined to destroy the Cosmic Order and invert life and death. With the world’s fate on the line, our heroes must be ready to sacrifice everything to save it.

In Bloodmoon Huntress, we get a very different peek into how the secret of the Moon arcanum can be thought of through Runaan, who is peak Moonshadow-sacrifice elf man:

Moonshadow form is only achieved when we understand the balance of life against death. Balance is weight against weight, and to understand the weight of death you must feel the weight and value of another's life. Think of those you love, of who you hold most dear. Now think of the souls who have touched your life. Understand that each time your weapon meets its target, each time we fulfil our duty, the potential for that soul to change a life—to love another—is gone. We may remove hate, but we remove the potential for love as well. Moonshadow form is only achieved when we reconcile this balance between life and death.

While Claudia with her hair and dark mage-assassin parallels could unlock the Moon arcanum—especially if her perspectives continue to change—I think Callum as the Protagonist is better placed at this time to be the one to understand the balance between life and death in a season where the antagonists are trying to invert/destroy it. Him therefore understanding appearances and changes, how to control his own and see through others', understanding that balance between life and death, feels very fitting.

Callum's fear of Aaravos and dark magic comes from the fear that he's changing—"I hope you're careful, cause [magic] can change people" / "the corruption takes innocent creatures and changed them"—and that death would be better for him than life if he goes too far. Learning these things aren't the case and that he can get back to the middle (and indeed, "real trust is about accepting even the dark parts we will never know" could be about Rayla accepting he may not entirely swear off dark magic again, the same way Viren kept that door open to do Good) would be useful.

It would also mean the two mage characters most drawn into Aaravos' darkness get the Moon and Sun—the arcanums most associated with light—to banish said darkness as well. Claudia finally being an uncorrupted light and chasing life, not death, and Callum, learning how to be balanced and that he can maintain his identity / use Aaravos' book and key without fearing that he'll lose control.

The fact that Claudia's eclipse imagery only started the same episode she lost her brother, and that her Laurelion dragon-scale necklace is very Sunfire-y looking...

Conclusion

TDP for Callum and Claudia has always felt like a parallel coming-of-age mage story between the two of them, leading to the amount of similarities and diverging plot beats the two have, down to doing the same spell at the same time but in different locations in S6. The Sun arcanum is associated with truth, light, and healing, whereas the Moon arcanum is associated with change, life + death, and secrets/love. All of these things could be nicely brought to a head with Callum and Claudia each unlocking an arcanum of Moon and Sun respectively, showcasing their differences, their continued room to grow, and light amid the darkness.

While I could see alternatives like Sun for Callum and Moon for Claudia, Stars for Callum or no arcanum for either of them, I think these are the ones that fit best at this time / Stars will likely get saved for arc 3 given that arc 3 will probably focus more on rewriting destinies and the Cosmic Order as antagonists.

As always hope you enjoy and Dragons out!

[yoku-yukihime]

would love to know more about yuki if you're willing to share. I like how scrungly her staff is.

Im honored! shes a pretty deep and complex oc all things considered tbh. so apologies if i ramble a bit! im going to try and include everything about her story wise lol. She comes from a hidden society of fox people, the society is pretty in tune with magic and stuff. very scholarly. most of the people that fall out of it become the kind of kitsunes u see that seduce people and steal spirit energy. but Yuki was a studying sorcerer. she was pretty invisible to move people, nothing fancy or stand outish. she happened to fall into a trap along her evening walk through one of the many archives and stumbled onto hidden books tucked far out of reach. forgotten memories and stories forbidden for the ages. Yuki became fascinated with dark arts and taboo mysteries. and important thing with the foxes of this society is that age is shown with tail number, often translates to wiseness. most get to nine and dont reach any more before passing from age. yuki still only had one around this time. she was maybe in her 20s. but looking upon the scripture she found, she stumbled upon legends of an ancient god that could grant a very special artifact. Yuki wanted it to show off, it promised great power. so she got Obsessed with this rabbit hole. she would spent hours, days, weeks, months wandering up the cliffsides by the ocean waiting and watching as she repeatedly tried to summon this old god. she camped out there, starved herself, almost died multiple times she hadnt been seen in the society for months and all searches were called off. she was considered dead. until it happened. one night it appeared over the ocean. It was completely inconceivable. the mere sight of it changed her world view entirely. her mind could not even begin to comprehend the higher existence this ... this thing came from the old god... was a text box. like one you'd see in an rpg game. upon laying eyes on it, yuki became aware of higher existence. it spoke to her in its beeps and text. it offers her its treasure. a red orb of endless magic. a bottomless well of mana to pull from to do whatever she liked with. this was it, what she wanted, she no longer cared after so long. she placed her hand upon the orb, and with that, the old god took over her body... but she made no resistance. she wanted this. she accepted the god inside her. they could work together. she was 100% Interested in what it wanted. and from then on, she started to call herself "The Great Witch" with the old god inside of her, she gained a special ability, being naturally aware of this Higher existence she can use an rpg menu, like dragon quest! check peoples stats, statuses, use her spells from a list instead of reciting incantations or waiting for cast times. every battle with her is Forcibly made turn based, for some reason people Cant attack if shes got her menu open. the gods rule forbids it. so she recognizes her new power, and she gets to go on a romp and do as she pleases! the forgotten young sorcerer is no more, but the soon to be greatest villain in all the land is born, Yuki never looks back and embraces the new her!

[laurentidal]

Confundus

Ginny sat alone in the stacks trying so hard to remember the spells she'd need to pass her exams. She knew that she'd learned everything. But ever since that spell backfired, her brain had been a little… scattered.

That awful Malfoy had been causing a scene again and she so wanted to shut him up. But something happened when she'd cast her spell. The wanted to Confund him. Make him think he was a chicken or something. But he must have been ready, and she ended up hitting herself instead. She shook it off, but in retrospect she probably should have gone to see Madame Pomfrey. Every now and then she would have strange thoughts. Like she was someone else. Her brain must have gotten more rattled that it seemed at first.

Tori - no. Ginny. Ginny got to her feet and sighed. She'd never pass at this rate. None of the spells she tried to cast were working. Not even that basic ones. It's like all her magic had disappeared. But that was impossible. It had to just be in her mind. Maybe once she went home and got some sleep.

Wait, home? She wouldn't be going home until school was done for the year. Why did she think she was going home tonight? What she needed was to find her friends. They always had a way of getting out of trouble. Maybe they could help. But where would they be?

Just then, Harry rounded the corner. Perfect.

"Ginny," he said with a wicked grin. "I've been looking for you."

"Oh yeah?" she asked. They hadn't been together long, but all that time pent up and waiting for it, Tori hadn't waited long to fuck him. Ginny. Ginny hadn't waited long. "And why were you looking for me?"

He reached out and ran his hands along her side, brushing her breast. "No real reason."

Her nipples stiffened at his touch. What had she wanted to talk to him about? It mustn't have been very important. That was another thing. Thoughts were sliding out of her mind with some regularity. She was in danger of becoming the new Neville. And it seemed to happen more around Harry. It must have just been her horniness taking over her brain.

"You want to go back to the dorms?" she asked running a finger slowly along the bulge she saw in his pants.

"Why wait?" he said. "I do have the invisibility cloak. We could do it right here."

He pulled up a large sheet that looked a little different from the cloak she'd seen him use before. But she must have just been wrong. She was so silly. It was his cloak after all. He'd know what it was. She giggled softly.

"People will hear."

"I'll just hex you mute."

That was a good point. She was soooo happy he was so smart. Especially since she couldn't do any magic at all right now. He walked over and hung the blanket across the door to their little room.

"There. Now no one can see us in here."

That wasn't how it worked! Tori had read enough to know that. You had to put it over yourself. Right now it was just a curtain in the door. But. But. Ginny wasn't Tori! She wasn't! And Ginny trusted Harry. Harry knew how his own invisibility cloak worked. He was the smart one. She was just the silly girl with no magic or brain.

"So," he said expectantly. "Strip."

Ginny smiled happily. He was always so direct. So commanding. Ever since they'd met yesterd… Ever since they'd started dating. He told her what to do and she did it. She was a good girlfriend. He pointed his wand at her.

"Muffliato."

She knew that one. It made her quiet. Harry often liked to cast that on her when she was annoying him. It made her so wet that he had so much power over her. She couldn't even defend herself without magic. So hot. She stood there, voiceless and naked as Harry looked at her.

"l can't believe this really worked," he said happily. 'You really think you're her, don't you? And you think this is Hogwarts. And I'm him. This whole fantasy I built for you… Amazing."

Ginny looked at him questioningly but content. She didn't know what he was saying but he was sooooo much smarter than she was. It would have been so silly to ask him anything. She wouldn't have understood it anyway.

"Alright 'Ginny,"' Harry said, pants falling to the floor. "We're going to fuck now. It's going to be ~~magical~~. And maybe when we're done I'll let you come back to reality. Tori's friends will be missing her eventually."

Ginny nodded eagerly at the word fuck and didn't really listen to anything else. If she could speak, she'd have squealed with excitement. Ginny loved to fuck. And after all, they were invisible. She'd been so worried earlier. Why? As long as she had a dick inside her, there was nothing else to worry about. She let her wand fall to the ground as she took a new length of wood and what little was left of her dumb little brain burst completely.

Thanks for reading! If you are a fan of my work, consider buying me a coffee. Any contribution is insanely appreciated. 💖

[angelsdean]

the way that nick spell in 14x17 makes it canonically SO easy to open a portal to the empty. it drives me insane. dean literally HAD cas's blood. on his jacket. it was all right there. it was set up perfectly. why show us nick opening a portal to the empty and specifically showing that the main ingredient was BLOOD then. not using that. dean was meant to rescue cas!!!!! full circle moment. i'm the one who gripped you tight a raised you from perdition. what's the matter, cas? you don't think you deserve to be saved? i love you, too. of course i love you. SMOOCH. anyways.

[linterteatime]

Some more human au thingys for y'all, rejoice, do a silly little dance idk

[slimey-wallz]

(Updated) About me!

If you have any questions, please ask away!

(Also forgot to add that I'm the creator of the slime AU, Depressed AU and Robo AU!)

I'll add more stuff to this soon 💕

[neosatsuma]

Had a mystifying conversation with a friend and now I'm curious. By "teach to spell," I mean, "Did your school have classes/segments dedicated to learning phonetic combinations, learning spelling 'rules' ('I before E except after C,' 'double consonants make a short vowel sound,' etc) and/or memorizing how to spell words of increasing complexity?"

[pigswithwings]

anyways dont always trust tumblr media recommendations because like 17 people all tagged my house post with Sarah Gailey's Just Like Home and. well it wasnt that good imo

[arthrobug]

Quick WIP before bed >:3

[leupagus]

Say what you will about Martin's writing style (and I've said plenty) but I do think he's got the White Walkers' mythos worked out for a future book and IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO NICE IF THE SHOWRUNNERS HAD DONE 1/100TH OF THAT WORK SETTING THEM UP

Gus: I am mad all over again that there was absolutely zero explanation given as to why/how the Night King operates or how his powers work or why he chose now to attack or ANYTHING ELSE

Gus: on the plus side it means I get to make up a whole subplot that, not to brag, I'm comfortable saying is at least as good as anything D&D could've made up IF THEY HAD EVER EVEN BOTHERED

Gus: but like - okay so craster's infant sons get sacrificed to the Night King, who them magics them into White Walkers as babies

Mardia: Yep yep

Gus: so does that mean there's a white walker nursery

Mardia: Omg

Gus: do they have to change diapers

Mardia: LOOOOOOOL

Gus: is there a white walker daycare center

Gus: how does the night king TEACH his lil adopted monster babies

Gus: is there like storytime around the - well not fire

Gus: does the Night King remember what it was like to sit around a fire?

Gus: does he miss being a human and all his rage at the spell the Children of the Forest put on him to kill the First Men has curdled his brain?

Gus: what was he DOING for like 8 millennia, just hanging out?

Gus: did he get really good at ice fishing?

Gus: DO THEY EAT?

Gus: where the fuck do they get their snazzy outfits from

Gus: are there white walker tailors

Gus: what's the currency situation

Mardia: Lololololololol

Gus: I'M JUST SAYING

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

[shima-draws]

How many times can people butcher my name challenge

[fazgoo-connoiseur-1987]

Everyone talks about the horror of a serial killer murdering kids and ghosts possessing things, but no one ever talks about the real horror: corporate greed

THATS LITERALLY WHAT FNAF IS ABOUT!!! THAT'S WHY WILLIAM FUCKING GETS AWAY WITH IT !!! THATS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE STORY YOU GUYS !!!

[hollowtones]

lot of people have desires and wants, thouhgts?

I think most people who are alive experience those three things, yeah. Maybe all people who are alive, but I can't say that with confidence.

[stardoopy]

Worms

(Happy Hughdebeste Day!)