#<- doesnt have a dick but will try anyways
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realizing im kind of a weirdo about laios and marcille
#possramble#ignore this im just babbling but#the thing is that like. i don't ship laios and marcille together. their relationship is so so important to me in that laios comphets himsel#and THINKS that he might be in love with her but he isn't and that's my insane obsession#platonic soulmates for real but they're so sweet together that i fully expect them to be shipped together#like i get it. that's almost the appeal for me. if dungeon meshi were any other series there'd be an epilogue where they get married#convention dictates that they're meant to be together as the male protagonist and his beloved female deuteragonist#but dungeon meshi DOESNT do that and i love it so fucking much they're the comphet besties ever for my strange little brain#like if i ever did an arranged marriage au it would absolutely be laios and marcille having a platonic political marriage and then just#the most insane mutual pining with marcille and falin while laios and marcille struggle their way into becoming best friends#the imagery of the king and his beautiful court mage being tender to each other and everyone thinking they're in love is like catnip to me#like yeah they'd be like that and have no idea people think they should be together and the subversion makes me so obsessed#the more people ship them romantically. the more i enjoy their platonic dynamic it's like some sort of weird comphet fetishism idk#people think they're in love and im outside the window like YES... YES!!!#but also the second i see stuff of them kissing on the mouth or fucking im like oh god no i went too deep in here i gotta get out#don't wanna see that. i'll go feral over the idea of laios and marcille being arm-in-arm like king and queen but they would not fuck.#i want marcille to be his default comphet beard and dance partner/plus one at official royal events but they're not kissing.#she's there on his arm because he's scared of the other noble women tryna get him and being a baby about it#and people see them muttering to each other and laughing and generally being very sweet and think that they're dating but they're not.#she's actually covered in hickies from falin underneath her dress and is gonna get dragon dicked right after the party is over#like she's in her bedroom and falin's helping her take her ridiculous dress off while listening to her complain about politics#and falin is the person she goes home to the person she falls asleep to and wakes up with#they're a triad of utter devotion to each other but only farcille's side of the triangle is romantic#it's almost like an open secret because they're not trying to hide it at all but people assume and are surprised to find out#like people are so right about her relationship with the toudens but with the siblings' roles switched#love of her life & irreplaceable life companion. does anyone get it#anyway. i don't know what's wrong with me#it bothers me that they're not the undisputed most popular het ship for marcille on ao3#it's unnatural. marcille being paired with any other man should be a fringe case.
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yk if i didn't grow up in a constant state of emotional repression, id probably be a disaster right now
#vent post look away look awayyy#ohhhhh theyre really trying it this time...#yall if you have piece of shit family members that you've cut off#dont EVER give them an inch. dont give them the time of day#doesnt matter their relation to you doesnt matter their feelings. fuck em#you cut them off for a reason and trust me they will only Prove your reasoning#FUCK EM!!!#absolutely unprompted#i believe... that perhaps.... there may be a restraining order in my future!!#omg i hope so that would be sooooo satisfying <3<3<3#come anywhere near me and i will metaphorically bite yer dick off <3<3<3#shits getting Messy again!!!! weeee!!!!#at least i have a fun new update for my dearest buddy sockeyesidequest <3#anyway im literally looking at this 'family' drama#and i feel like a rabid dog on a chain. just let me go. please. please. its fine i dont bite (lying) im totally peaceful#i totally dont have a whole life of bottled up unrealized rage to unleash. double prommy <3#'let me know if i can help ill give him a piece of my mind' i say as if i dont actively fantasize about getting his blood on my knuckles
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Why do you think Roier and Missa are easiest to understand? I found the same thing as someone who's just learning Spanish, and I wasnt sure if it was because I've watched so much Roier content that it influenced my ability to understand him, or if there's a deeper reason due to some regional accent differences being easier for non-native speakers to understand. I'm curious about your thoughts since you have really good insights into linguistics, but ignore this if it's too much for tumblr lol!
neither of them talk super fast, and imo their accents are fairly easy to understand-- for me, missa is easy to understand bc he's from the north and that region has accents i'm more familiar with, and roier's accent is somewhat neutral although obviously still clearly mexican and he uses a lot of slang. i think that also helps-- roier uses a lot of the same vocab, so if you're still learning spanish, you can pick up that slang and then understand quite a bit of what he's saying because he swears literally five times in a single sentence. they both speak pretty clearly and, additionally, i think most non-native spanish speakers, especially U.S. americans, are most familiar with mexican spanish rather than other dialects. so that's why someone like rubius or spreen is harder for nonnative speakers to understand, unless they're more familiar with spanish or argentine dialects specifically.
for me it's hard to parse bc i understand most of what they all say regardless since i've spoken spanish for so long, but i think rivers is just difficult because she speaks very fast. mariana is pretty easily to understand as well, there's just less for me to say about him tbh idr where he's from and i don't really have a hard time understanding him, i just watch him less than anyone else really.
for quackity, his accent is more noticeable, and his spanish is a little weirder, in that he is so bilingual and if you're not familiar with that way of speaking it can be hard to pick up what he's saying sometimes. this is partially why i wish there were a few more latino americans on the server so people get more familiar with that type of bilinguality-- i think quackity is in a unique position that he doesn't full share with other server members (aside from mouse, in that she is also a latino who lives in the states, although from a content perspective she doesn't do the same kind of bilingual split that q does nor does she stream in spanish), and i would be interested to see more of that kind of diasporic latino experience on the server. that's me rambling and doesn't have to do with accents i've just been thinking about it for a while and i think it would be cool. but yeah q phrases things funny sometimes because he's thinking of the english way of saying something or vice versa, and he is by far one of the most fluently bilingual members of the server, so it's an interesting dynamic for people watching him who aren't super familiar with spanish nor the kinds of calques and things that end up happening with bilingual speakers.
anyway back to your actual questions i do also think exposure does tip the scales lol most of us watch more roier than anyone else and esp for people just learning spanish, you're gonna understand him better than anyone else because of that. which is nice in some ways bc you learn a lot of slang but also if you're going to speak spanish in any kind of non-casual setting please do not talk like roier he is a fucking crazy person who swears so much it's actually unreal
#asks#anons#also this isnt me trying to label q as mexican american since he doesnt call himself that at all#just that he is a latino who lives (part-time) in the states so its a slightly different dynamic if that makes sense? idfk#labels are difficult im not trying to put any on q i just think that element of his life is important to acknowledge#when it comes to his bilingualism#also im not putting a value judgment on fluency levels its just very clear q is extremely fluent in both in a way most people aren't#sorry i have to give a billion caveats i dont want anyone to think im trying to be a dick or assume too much about ccs#and again im white us american and not latino myself#also unrelated to the rest of this but the funniest thing to me about qs accent in eng is how randomly he throws in east coast vowel change#like where did he get those. i need to know#anyway this is way more answer than was probably needed and i spent forever writing it#and now my nephew is here i have to go play with hotwheels
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Does anyone else ever think about how Damian might have had a semblance of a normal childhood if Dick had just like chosen not to relinquish guardianship of him? Because, I think about it a lot actually.
Like I know why he did but what if he didn't? Like what if Dick and Barbara raised him together? Like what then? Sure, it would be awkward because your bio-dad would also technically be your granddad and your father would also be your brother, but overall I think it would have been better for Damian.
I'm sure there are fics about this, drop them in the comments for me, will ya?
#He would get all the hugs and positive feedback from two not emotionally constipated parents#Lets not pretend Bruce is actually raising him anyway#Maybe in this timeline Bruce stayed dead or just decided parenting wasnt for him so now they are raising Tim and Cass too#Tim and Cass would get all the affection too#Damian trying to explain his family: My father sucked and being a dad so now hes my grandfather#Damian: my brother and sister are still my brother and sister though#Damian: Except for my brother Jason. Hes now my uncle#Jason: Thats uncle brother Jason to you twirp#Anyone trying to comprehend it: What in the sweet home Alabama?!#Dick and Babs could do it as a romantic couple or even just platonically#he could be like that kid whose parents are divorced#but they live together because they still love each other they just arent in love anymore#Babs: Hey kiddo its just you and me tonight dad has a hot date#Damian: Tt gross#If it doesnt exist maybe I have to write it!#batfamily#dick grayson#barbara gordon#damian wayne#bruce wayne#tim drake#jason todd#cassandra cain#I tagged them because I mentioned them in the tags
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I made a meme do you leik it :)
#i am SUFFERING out here#i have a presentation and essay for one module a presentation for another module and an object to make with a 1000 word explanation??#for another module all due within the next two weeks#and i am unable to get out of bed 👍🏻#fantastic timing dont you think#theres been trouble with my antidepressents so im off those too which ahahahahah doesnt help#and i cant got to the doctors for them cause ill have to fight for it and then that will give them reason to not give me testosterone in#december when im due to get it cause im 'unstable' and my doctors surgery isnt very fond of me starting anyway#im not about to give them a reason to stop me from getting the perscription#so ive just got to fucking raw dog life for the first time since i was 16 how great#no i cannot complete these very important assignments that count towards my degree im trying not to throw myself into oncoming traffic soz#and also trying to manage to feed myself and perhaps leave my bedroom for a total of five minutes at least a day#this has not been entirely achievable but yk im doing my best 😀👍🏻#depressive episode#did any of yall see those two girls with a podcast that said i love my mental illness it makes me who i am#because i think about those two far too often and im so glad everyone was in the comments so much so they deleted the video lmfao cause bro#depression#can suck my dick#in a bad way
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how to make a character who sucks so bad and nobody likes him but he is genuinely a good protagonist (good as in interesting, maybe on a rare day good as in decent but also, just like, an incredible jackass) . i need to make him worse i need to make him MEANER!
#i think the key to getting this kind of character right is that he can't try to be anybody's boss#that's not the fun and engaging kind of jackass that's just reminding the reader of all the bosses they've hated in their time#the engaging and likeable Guy Who Sucks So Bad is a loner who might CLAIM that he will take over the group or whatever and lead#but never actually has any intentions of doing so because part of the things he sucks re: is responsibility of any kind#he does however know that leaders dont like other people horning in on their territory so he will say things like#i'm gonna wreck your shit and then all your lackeys will follow ME! ouahahahahaha . despite having zero plans to follow up with that#the ideal engaging asshole protagonist is a rebel without a good cause: maybe he has a sad backstory; maybe he's just a dick#but if there's one thing about him you can count on it's that he is Opposed To Shit. doesnt matter what it is his primary entertainment#is picking a fight with it for no reason and then saying what the fuck ever i didn't care about it anyway (he didn't)#ideally this is all done in such a way that he is SEXY . but you'd never want to hang with him because he is deeply obnoxious#he is not bossy. he is not controlling. he is maybe even a bit of a wife guy except he hates everyone else and wants to make their day wors#because making someone else's day worse makes HIS day better . the ideal wife for him is the one from ordinary day with peanuts#by shirley jackson#and i have GOT to figure out a way to engineer this guy without copying examples of my favorite versions of him wholesale#i have the scaffolding. but because of my own confrontation-averse tendencies#im terribly concerned that i will never be able to actually make him the asshole he was born to be#q
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Tumblr deleted a post I did in early january explaining (and venting) about the situation in my country but I did record it (I wanted to show my best friend how much I wrote about it) so here is the post.
#zagreus rambling#Im pretty sure tagging it “El Salvador” was a mistake and some asshole who sucks the president's dick reported it#still very fucking weird Tumblr did not notify of them taking it down#doesnt surprise me knowing its me shitting on the recent president. but regardless#I might try to re-write it since I have the video but honestly rn I dont feel like doing it#anyways this is good to rb too
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So I got new shoes and tried out these new insoles with em and man do my feet fucking hurt
But it made me think ab advice [relative coworker] (and other senior coworkers who have now left) that you can tell right off the bat if we're going to have a good visit or a bad visit from the corporate lady by just looking at her shoes. If she has heels, we will have a bad visit. If she has some form of comfy shoes like sneakers, it's more likely to be a good visit. And it made me think
Goddamn is this bitch a fucking moron and a jackass. Like you KNOW how you feel when you have uncomfortable shoes on. You KNOW that that can be prevented by just wearing sneakers. Fuck you're like a gazillionaire you can afford stylish COMFY SHOES! Why the fuck are you showing up to these visits, which you already know you do not enjoy, with heels?? What kinda fucking idiot are you??
And she still has not personally visited since I started btw it has been prophesied 8 fucking times in a year. Get some better shoes you cranky fucking jackass, maybe then you'll feel like showing up.
#marquilla#i get it no one wants to be in ohio blah blah blah but like it's your job but also jfc get dr scholl's ya dumbfuck! take some advil and#power through with a 'good attitude' like the rest of us#like my feet fucking HURT and i was actively trying to NOT be a dick bc of that bc i know it's no ones fault but my own that i feel like#that but like you're telling me Ms. Moneybags doesnt have enough to buy some good shoes and thats why we keep failing? thats why she keeps#skipping our store? (not complaining ab the last part) like fucking come the fuck onn#no one is gonna be looking at your fancy heels bitch you could show up in sweats and sneakers and the managers would still trip over#themselves to please you and you know why?? BC YOURE THEIR BOSS FUCKHEAD WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPRESS HERE??#like im gonna fix this situation that IM having by wearing my old shoes/old insoles until i get new insoles that are more cushiony than#support based bc thats what i need. you mean to tell me you are 30-40 something and you cant figure out what literal 11 year old me figured#out?? which was if im gonna wear heels im gonna buy those inserts that stick to the inside of the shoe to give me cushion and support#you mean that broke ass little 11 year old me had it figured out and you a gazillionare jr. cant do the same??#AND DR SCHOLL'S MAKES NICE SHOES TOO DUMBASS i had dr scholl's brand dress shoes in 7th grade that were sooo fucking cute im so mad i#outgrew them and that they stopped selling those ones 😭 anyway im ranting sgdggdgdgd im just tired of rich bastards being morons
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the xenophobia in genshin is crazyyy 😭
#likeeee within the own game world u have paimon being the stupid lil 'voice' of the player thats literally just used to say rude shit#that u cant even refute.... like the worst offenders is that she straight up says shit like 'theyre fatui u cant trust them'#or 'theyre eremites u cant trust them'#like thats crazy how the two groups we 'cant trust' are based on russians and middle easterners????#anyways i like this game but i have SO many gripes about random shit like this thats bad#some really specific combat stuff annoys me#like umm why does yelan's hydro aimed shot cooldown at a set rate when not fighting but not while fighting?? why not just make it the same?#or why cant shieldwall mitachurls take damage from behind their shields if u shoot them FROM BEHIND?? the shot literally goes thru them#it just makes using ganyu super annoying bc i use her cryo construct skill to divert the enemies so i can shoot them but with shieldwalls#they turn away and then i just still cant do damage until theyre attacking?? even if theyre frozen??#hashtag just combat mechanics that dont make sense#also why tf do you sometimes just randomly lose grip on walls ur climbing and start sliding down like ?????#i always seem to go off on the tags of my own posts and never in the post itself huh. i coulda just written all this#anyways this post inspired by zhongli story quest starting with - archeologist guy who paimon immediately goes OH NO A FATUI DROP UR WEAPON#like im sorry since when are we teyvats cop?also the dude literally isnt holding a weapon which he points out but the game still makes u go#'hes fatui we have to be cautious' when the dude is nothing but nice. imagine ur doing ur job and some random girl and her floating toddler#try to fucking arrest you for literally just chilling#anyways and then the dude is like sure you can come along :) for no reason when we were just a dick#bc they have no idea how to write meaningful/realistic npcs jesus christ#sure ppl are like 'who cares its a random NPC' i care its literally so annoying and doesnt make me want to play ur stupid game#also not to mention the pyramid quest in the desert where (worst npc) tirzad is like 'we cant trust these two (his bodyguards!!) -#- because they're eremites' and yeah its whatever disproven by jebrael and jeht being the most slayful NPCs in the game#but paimon still AGREES WITH HIM?? and at that point i was like ok so this sucks but whatever but then#as if that isnt enough after jeht joins the tanit later or wtv u have to go through a whole questline that literally ends w dismantling#their entire village?? its very much reflective of rhetoric like how jeht is the 'only good one of '''them'''' aka thinly veiled racism#like oh its fine because SHE is 'one of the good ones' no fuck you wth#and no having like 2 desert npcs in the archon quest be nice doesnt make up for some of the crazy racist shit they say in the sumeru quests#umm anyways. cant wait for fontaine where the number of characters with non snow white skin will once again be reduced to 0#because they're french right and poc dont exist in france :( /s#this is probably the longest rant ive ever gone on for this game i literally paused the game to type all that 😭
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whats mellos ideal date?
One with L. 😇💖😌
#sorry anon i let this sit for a few days trying to come up with something but i have no idea lol#clubbing maybe? but ive kind of written about that before for date night hc#still cant get that phrase somebody said out of my head. mello is panting like a DOG for him.#anyway i do kind of stand by the fact that this is true LOL doesnt even have to be romantic#mello would drag his dick through a mile of broken glass to hear L fart through a walkie talkie or whatever that post was
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i hope the celling fan fall on yall 😒
#/ref obsessed with this phrase#anyway this is abt the fucingng obsession with the mario movie. dont wanna be a dick but omfg#the thing is like. a lot of the people just yk enjoy the fucking movie and thats fine and chill whatever#bowser sings one of my names at some point apparenty i dont have the right to complain whatever#but like. every person i trust to come at this with good faith has said that the movie is fun bc mario references and j being silly fun#whatever bla bla but other than thats it doesnt rly have much depth and like. isnt a superr great movie#but when everyone else comes at it with HOWW DAREE CRITICS NOT LIKE THE MARIO MOVIE ITS GOOD >:( its like. shut up#like you have to acknowledge when most of the joy of a movie comes from refernces not everyone gonna get#people arent going to treat it like its a masterpeice !! and thats okay whatever !!!#and the movie being fun without any other depth to it doenst automatically make it the most incredible movie ever#obvs the mario movies doesnt need to try to be emotional but like. you can make a movie thats but fun and emotionally impactful#at the same damm time !!!! its possible belive it or not !!!#the one of/most popular/well loved animated movie of last year and most popular movie overall of last year are both movies that#(while i havent seen one of them yet sorryy to the eeaaw girls 😶😶😶 will one day soon i prommy)#are both very fun and silly in places and known and loved for the emotinal impact they had on people cmon man !!#when the animated movie there is still in cinemas for many at the same time of the mario movie#the argument that the movie is fun or a kids movie so u shldnt expect any depth is dumb#the argument that its a mario movie and mario isnt a very plot heavy game makes more sense tho but i feel like#less ppl are making that for some reason? like it not no one but still. and the mario games are capable of depth sometimes#not to mention the reason having less depth with plot works is due to fun gameplay which idk if fun movie scenes can replicate fully#anyway enjoy the mario movie whatever have fun i literally love mario so fucking myslef and ik most ppl are like#being normal abt it and just enjoying a movie but man are the vocal minority just have fully put me off of it#my sibling is going tmrw and im not joining them bc im watching pibtlw w james+luce. but i also just dont wanna at this point#flappy rambles
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i really dont know what to expect from magolor epilogue and im honestly not expecting a ton of story (lore stuff, absolutely bc magolor is kinda stuffed w lore as a character already) but ngl i do sorta hope theres at least a little bit of a hint of him improving or feeling bad or redemption so that people stop saying that he exists to be abuse apologia bc “he never got a real redemption arc”
#yknow ignoring that kirby as a series doesnt quite has a steady narrative#by this logic dedede being good now is abuse apologism bc he was a villain once and hes not allowed to improve and his arc was offscreen#and hes had a few villainous moments so obviously hes a poorly written character who ur suspicious for liking bc it means ur manipulative#u may think im exaggerating but fans back in the day were literally comparing him to abusers like. no?#tbf i mostly saw this during the point when this website was like ‘’redemption arcs are bad writing inherently’’ w no nuance#and trying to apply what went wrong with su to every property ever whether it fit or not#magolor is a fuckhead. yeah hes a dick. u dont have to like him but its so wild how ppl will act abt him#and its not even comparable to msot examples ppl compare him to like lusamine#w lusamine the argument was ‘’oh shes sad and she was a good mom once so she was never REALLY evil. ignore her verbally abuse lillie pls’’#magolor��s actions were never painted as something he couldnt control or that were misunderstood and well intentioned#hes a villain and the game is aware of that and thats why yknow. he literally got vaporized in the original#the ‘’oh he was only being possessed and controlled’’ thing was a misconception on fanons part. before rhe soul fight anyways#the reason he keeps coming back is bc hes a popular character that people like and wanted to see more of#and the reason his actions are brushed under the rug is not bc of a manifesto of why abuse is ok#its bc the devs were like ‘’wow itd be cool if u could race magolor in this game’’ and its not insensitive bc magolors plan was not based#in reality. idk this discussion annoys me lol#its fun to rag on him and bully him but trying to go ‘’if u like him that’s suspicious bc u like an abuser’’ is ridiculous#echoed voice
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I do wonder how I will be percieved when I reveal my plans for Chocip and Peppark... lolz
#Not coorelated at all but I just wanna say Im dropping the whole 'chocip is actively trying to out Sery and Berum' semi-a-plot#Mainly bc. The way I portray Chocip is like. rather comidic#Like hes a dick and hes already a bigot. but his audacity and desperation makes him a comedian of sorts. A character to have fun laughing a#And having something as serious as that. Actively trying to get 'evidence' that two of his younger siblings are trans#And out them to their transphobic parents. where the best case scenario is disownment. Yeah jfc the laughable one doesn't need that#Like I said he's already a bigot. He doesnt need to prove he's one by trying to put his siblings in serious harm's way#Its not me taking away his edge or making him a 'better' guy its just knowing when to take a step back lol#I can admit I didnt cook with that one!!! But Im just saying it just in case its ever brought up#Thats no longer canon information so don't perceive Chocip like that. perceive him for everything else but not this 'plot'#Anyways with that said. One day the populus will understand what this means
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knock on wood but already had the thought about how the potential What If winstuk of ostensible post-7x03/WDE could just be....boisterous. effulgent. vibrant.
#and it could Not Be. we could have tuk be like i; specifically; hate you; specifically. bit of a damper esp. not assuming further material#but if there's the setup for Contrast Surprise in ''everyone hates winston & has been assaulting him or not moved to make sure he's not#assaulted all day'' bad time & he ends up Unleashed. perfect time to meet just out of frame like knock knock it's me your actual friennd...#anyways i have boundless thoughts; feelings abt WDE Impends that i won't try to expound & enumerate via thirty tags limits#representative is how atm the vibe is [mild] but earlier did have an adrenal response to secondhand info. which is also just a tuesday but#winston billions#winstuk#it could sure just be everyone lining up for a last chance at telling winston they wish he was dead & then forget he exists next ep#like what happens when he's been offscreen for a moment all these five seasons lol#and of course i've thought abt ''well it's not even off the table he litchreally dies offscreen lol lmao''#it's just like 4x11 time to lose forty followers overnight#causing mpc problems? maybe someone will kill you for real.#then his life will have served its highest purpose: upping the stakes for people who matter (rian going ''hope that doesnt happen to me'')#but this would be as likely as anyone following up on winston ever to even realize if he's alive or not. maybe if they Had to ask him smth#billions probably wouldn't be that mean but who even knows. do you want maximal drama out of the winston sendoff or not#like thanks for naming an episode after him and his dick energy i guess....could've just written him out offscreen entirely#but i also have the standards of ''yes i'm gonna be pissed if/when they write him out w/o treating him like another Person in universe''#and even if they do at all in some ways. i'll also be annoyed if they stick to the tradition of not letting taylor talk to him#i know someone official liked my livetweet about that backpat. you all had better do any damn thing. sigh. anyways#only Some expounding. the winstuk setup potential could also be cuntrageous as it'd be great if winston could be more generally
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Yandere Batfam x reader who cant feel pain
HEhehehe i just remembered a disease and I just had to write about a reader with it x yandere batfam.
Have you guys heard of CIPA? Its "Congenital insensitivity to pain with anhidrosis" which is basically a genetic condition when a patient cant feel pain to any noxious stimulus and can also not sweat, and yall are probably like "but SNoWWW, that doesnt like a diSEase. More like a superpower!!!" um no. You need to be able to feel pain or else you wont know what part of your body has been injured and get help before its too late. You could have thumbtack plunged in your foot and u wouldnt know unless it got infected and u probably saw ur foot changing color.
And now yall are like "but SNoWw, the anhidrosis part, where u cant sweat, sounds nice! who would to look like a sweaty pig in this age????" NO! Sweating is a necessary physiologic phenomenon because it lets your body cool down as it releases heat. If you dont sweat, you'd overheat and DIE!
Okay now that we've covered the basic info, lets get into it:
So, Batfam finds out about reader when she's just running into danger with little to no care for self preservation, and they dismiss it as you being just another dumb teen wanting to be hero and "change the world". Time passes by and Bruce is impressed by your passion and decides to take you under his wing.
It isnt until months later that Bruce discovers something odd about your behaviour. You were standing in the kitchen with the rest of the batkids, laughing and having a good time when he saw Dick had pulled out a hot pan of cookies from the oven and placed it on the aisle. The pan slipped, and without thinking, you had grabbed the hot pan with your bare hands very calmly and placed it back on the aisle, without so much as a hiss of pain or even a sweat.
And now that he thinks about it, Bruce has never seen you sweat. Not during training, not during summer, not even when after you ran laps around the mansion.
With a quick search on the Internet, he finds out about the disease and of course its Dick who he confides in first about his suspicions. Soon, the rest of the batfam has heard the rumours and now they're all watching you keenly to see if its true.
But Jason is the one who tests out the theory quickly by spilling some hot tea on your hand when you were busy talking to Tim about the importance of sleep. The room goes dead silent as they watch your hand turn red, yet you fail to react. It took you a few seconds to realise that they're all looking at you, and when you follow their gaze, it takes you a few seconds to react.
Or fake a reaction.
You shriek, pulling your reddening hand as you run to the sink and run it under cold water, your mind trying to come up with an excuse. But you know its too late when Bruce's hand comes to clasp your shoulder, pulling you away from the sink as his eyes examine your injured hand and... you.
"Bruce I-"
"I know, Y/n." He gives you assuring nod, carefully bandaging your hand as you sat in his office. "You have CIPA, hm?"
You looked down. Why bother lying? He's Batman, he'll find out anyways.
Bruce lifted your head and smiled gently at you. "Its okay. I'm not disappointed in you. I just... you could've told me." You shook your head. "If I did, you would've treated me differently... like a freak."
He sighed. "You are different, but I would've never treated you like a freak. You're not a freak. If anything, between us, I'm more of a freak than you." He was talking about being a hero, but you giggled at the thought of him referring to being a rich dude who cosplays in spandex.
Bruce cupped your cheek and smiled. "I promise, no one will treat you like a freak. But we will have to take some precautions for your safety."
-
He lied. You've never felt more like a freak than you do now.
Every single day would start off with Dick waking you up and sticking a thermometer in your mouth because he needs to make sure that you're not overheating, even though Bruce has set a thermostat in your room that he controls and he's programmed it to turn your room temperature change by the hour.
Then Dick would start checking you all over for any bruises or injuries, even a scratch, that you may have caused yourself in your sleep. Originally, Damian was the one who had a whole checklist as he examined your body, but that all ended the moment you smacked him when he asked you to lift your shirt. Dick would just have you go and check yourself in the bathroom and trust you when you said you're all good. Also, you're much nicer to Dick than you are to the rest of the brothers (its his puppy dog eyes and that sweet voice that compels you to do as he asks. He's just too nice.)
Dick would then lead you to down for breakfast with the family, where Alfred already has your glucometer out because of course, they must check your blood sugar level every day, lest they find out you're diabetic or something. Only then would you be served your meal, which is a highly nutritous, perfeclty seasoned, balanced dish because they want to make sure you dont have any vitamin deficiencies (because how would they know???? you dont feel pain). But you cant eat just yet. No no, whichever brother is closer, most often Jason, will first taste your food to make sure its not too hot to consume (because you dont realise you've burned the roof of your mouth that one time when Tim ate a slice of pizza that was fresh out of the oven and huppahhuffpuhh the morsel out). Jason would then give you the go to eat and you finally do. You make sure to finish the whole plate (because otherwise Bruce will make note of it and then interrogate you "medically" why you didnt feel like eating all of it?)
After breakfast, while the rest of the batkids get to go to school and work, you dont (because Bruce thinks that your immune system could be weak and he cant risk you catching any diseases from the outside.) No, you get a special trip to the infirmary where Bruce and Alfred do a more thorough medical check up, taking your vitals, JOTTING IT DOWN, while Alfred hooks you up to an IV drip of vitamins. And even though they go to such extents to ensure that you're healthy, they still take you to a skilled doctor once a week for regular check ups. Bruce wanted to keep the doctor in the house to do daily check ups, but you talked him out of it that you dont want to feel like a lab rat who has her blood taken every day. Once a week is fine, Bruce.
Once the medical check up is done, Bruce would then take you with him, either to Wayne enterprises where you sit in his office as he imparts you "business education that no school can teach you." which you believe because... well he has managed to triple the Wayne wealth even after his parents death. If he's working from home, then he'll let you accompany him in his home office where you can either read a book he chose for you (because Bruce prefers to homseschool you himself) or do a puzzle/case he created specifically for you. If he's working in the batcave, then he'll let you tag along but you can only work here by brainstorming or doing some computer research, but in no way are you allowed to ever go on field and fight. No, not since your last incident.
Just 2 months ago, you were patrolling with Jason (because Bruce refused to let you go alone now. He just wont risk it) and you encountered some bad guys who were a little more well equipped than you two had expected. A fight broke out, and in the process you got hurt badly. Of course, you didnt realise it because you didnt feel any of the punches or the bone fracturing. Jason could only look at you in dread as you smashed your head against the villain's head until the guy passed out, all while your nose bled, you were covered in bruises from top to bottom, AND you had a bone sticking out of your arm.
"Jay? I think I'm hurt?" You asked as blood coated your teeth.
After that, Bruce forbid you from going out on the field altogether because you just dont know when to stop. If it werent for bones sticking out or blood dripping down your face, you wouldnt know that you've been injured.
Anyways, at lunch, almost everyone has returned from work/school and you get yet another balanced meal (temperature tested by another brother). You're now scheduled for some exercises, usually conducted by Damian (under Dick's supervision because otherwise, you'd just be smacking that devil's spawn.) You guys use the gym in the basement, where Damian makes you run on the treadmill for some time, during which he does not take his eyes off you once because he needs to know when he should stop you, especially since you dont sweat or are even huff. If he didnt keep time, you could probably run for a long time and not realise that your legs or lungs are begging you to stop and take a break. As you hop off the machine, he's immediately taking your temperature. He does it after every exercise he makes you do.
After that is done, you spend time with Tim who likes to have you try on little gadgets that should "help you feel pain", but so far, he hasnt had any luck (but he doesn seem to be doing good in disguising trackers in your daily wear things). Oh and Damian loves to join in because he gets to sneak up on you and prick you with needles to help Tim see if your sensory pathways work. They dont, but you dont need your pain receptors to detect Damian coming up behind you as you smack him when he tries to prick you.
Then dinner is served, and then you're ushered straight to bed where Dick, or more often- Bruce has you do a self check like the one Dick does in the morning, but Bruce also makes sure to check your eyes to see if you "accidentally scratched your cornea" or whatever, tucks you in, tells you that he's so proud of you for how youre handling this and that you can come to him anytime, for anything. He kisses your forehead, wishes you goodnight, and leaves.
Half an hour later, Jason sneaks into your room with the goodies- junk food and video games. You two have the strongest bond because Jason is the one who treats you the most normal, and Jason does it partly to piss off Bruce but partly because he cares about your mental health. He knows it cant be good for you to be cooped up in the mansion under supervision like a bird in a gilded cage.
So sometimes, he sneaks you out of the mansion and takes you out on late night rides on his bike. You can even watch him fight villains, but you're sat far away and can never interferre.
Unfortunately for you two, this sneaking out will have to end because Bruce had recently decided to set up some cameras in your room because he wanted to make sure you slept well without any abnormal breathing patterns. Bruce hopes he doesnt have to use restraints on you, because he's not blind. He knows you're uncomfortable with this intricate routine and knowing your impulsive self, you'd probably break your own bones to get out of these restraints. And then he'll be forced to use sedatives and he really doesnt wanna rely on drugs... he likes your company when you're not droopy.
And as Bruce had anticipated, you broke down. You finally tried to leave, and he could see the color draining your face as you realised that there is no leaving.
"Why isnt the door opening?" You asked Bruce, as his four sons slowly surrounded you.
"You dont have to run away, Y/n-" He tried to calm you down but you flinched away, eyes wide as you looked at him like he was going to harm you.
"Bruce, why isnt the fucking door opening?" Your voice trembled, shooting him teary glare before focusing your eyes back on the boys who were closing in on you.
"You're meant to stay here, inside, where its safe." He answered, heart aching at the alarmed stance you took, your fight-or-flight was going to kick in. He took another step towards you, hands raised in surrender. "We can keep you safe-" thats all it took for you to bolt as the boys began chasing you. Realistically, you knew you couldnt escape them but something about their intensely concerned calls for your name had you jumping out of the window.
Glass shattered and sharp shards embedded themselves in your skin and feet, but you didnt react to them. No, your brain wasnt screaming in pain, it was screaming for you to get out!
Adrenaline pumped you to run into the dark woods surrounding the mansion, but you were soon knocked to the ground by Dick, who cushioned your fall by placing you on top of him as his hands wrapped around your form like a cage. "Y/n, calm down and listen-"
You began thrashing in his arms, screaming in agony. "Let ME GO! YOU'RE HURTING ME-!" Dick's arms loosened instinctively and you took that as a chance to elbow him in the throat and run, thanking some deity for letting Dick forget that you cant feel pain.
But your relief is short lived as Damian catches you and pushes you to the ground harshly. "Damian! Be careful! She could break a bone-"
"Bones can heal, Drake." Damian barked back, pulling you up before he pushed you against tree. "Let me go, you maniac-" Damian's hand clamped around your throat, making you shut up. "You're the one who's a maniac. Look at you! You've fucking hurt yourself because if your astounding stupidity!"
You whimpered, clawing at his hand wrapped around your throat. "Dami- p-please let go- you're hurting me!" You cried out, but your eyes went wide as he squeezed your throat and bared his teeth at you. "Not falling for it, dumbass." So... fooling Damian wasnt as easy a feat as it was fooling Dick.
You stopped the act and looked at him dead serious. "Let me go, Damian, or-"
"Or what?"
Or what? Or what? Did he think you were out of options? Out of escape plans?
You dont know why, but that triggered something inside you.
Damian and Tim could only watch as you suddenly slammed the back of your head against the tree. "Y/n-" He gasped in horror as you leaned your head forward before slamming it back against the hard rough surface. This time, Damian's hand that was wrapped around your neck felt your blood around his fingers.
"Its my life and I get to decide how I should live it." You sneered before raising your head again to bash it, but Damian's hand quickly slipped from your neck to the back of your head, cushioning it when you smacked it back, the skin on the back of his hand breaking as it made contact with the bark.
You pushed him away and tried to make a run for it, but Tim grabbed your wrist. You tried to pull away, but he had a death grip on it. "Y/n, stop! You need to listen-"
"Oh is that so? I think I need this." You used your other hand to punch yourself in the face (because Tim would've dodged it if you punched him), making your nose bleed. But you didnt feel any pain, and now you were acting like a super soldier zombie that has no concept of self preservation who is going through fucked up lengths to prove her point.
Your eyes caught the sight of a glass shard poking out of your thigh. "Wanna see something cool?" You pulled out the shard, not paying mind to the blood oozing out. "Y/n, stop-" Tim begged, and you saw Damian froze in the back as you raised the shard.
They didnt know what your next target was- slashing your wrists, slitting your throat, or stabbing your stomach, but fortunately, they didnt have to find out as Jason came up behind you and injected you with a tranquilliser.
Sadly, you never felt the prick or sensed the hero sneaking up behind you.
thoughts? also, what other diseases would u guys like me to write for. i just adore these cool medical abnormalities lol
#yandere batfam#yandere batman#yandere batboys#yandere bruce wayne#yandere jason todd x reader#yandere jason todd#yandere dick grayson#yandere damian wayne#yandere damian x reader#yandere tim drake#yandere#yandere x darling#yandere x you#yandere x reader#yandere x y/n#yandere family
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Batboys and y/n at gala ( nigthwing and jason ver_)
I really suggest checking out 'type of y/n I ship with batboys post " to get a better idea of the type of y/n I write per batboy
dick- shower s'x as a good luck before leaving is non negotiable .Hyper when getting ready, wants his hair to look great, wants you to compliment him and will take hayley no matter what. is lowkey excited to go. Will blast music and have a car karaoke. Walks around the whole gala, talks to everyone and pulls you along with him. Proly has to give a speech which he absolutely rocks. charming , charismatic and an amazing conversationalist . spends most time with grandmas at the party, they are the only people he will allow to leave you with. You do have an option to hang out with his siblings and make fun of him otherwise you are stuck with him till the end. Will prolly be the last to leave, helps alfred round up his siblings. Everyone thinks you're the luckiest person in the world cuz u just got the whole lottery of people by getting dick but he is sure to remind you how much he needs you, especially when trying to power through a boring ass gala. Once the event is over, boy is drained . super tired and sleepy. help him out of his shirt and cuddle him,. slow and sweet s'x which may or may not turn into more but he just needs some loving and peace. poor thing had to make so much small talk his brain hurts. give him a head rub. will get you flowers or chocolates the next day as a thanks for dealing with the gala cuz he knows how boring those things get.
Jason- He doesnt wanna go. say the word and u guys aren't going. but you promised alfred or ,maybe you thought it'll be fun. plus u get to see him in a suit which is sooohot jfejqfbq .. anyways complains while getting ready, super grumpy give him a kiss to shut him up. Will try to seduce you out of going...may succeed and get you late / cancel. Will also try to touch u in the car so be sure to just keep suching his hand away. will ruin your lipstick and if u like me wear lip stain.. well u should prolly cancel cuz he is gonna stain everything. Just wear transfer proof lipstick with clear gloss and carry a clear gloss. Follows your lead in the gala , or stands in a nice corner with you with him. Don't you dare leave him with these rich bastards he will stab someone. Will find some way of getting you out of their asap which means quickie in the car or the bathroom. now you are too ruined to go back to the gala . so you guys just go to the nearest fast food restaurant/ diner and pick the corner booth His suit jacket on you cuz he might have torn your dress a little , his tie tied like a pirate scarf on your head and his top 3 shirt buttons undone. you guys throw fries at one another and are prolyl tipsy from the gala champagne. i would not be surprised if jason stole a bottle just as a "fuck the rich thing" . You guys for sure end up in the newspaper the next day but who cares. go home singing stupid girly pop songs , arms interlinked, drunk in the gotham snow. prolly fuck you again once you get home cuz u just looked so hot. dw he'll buy you a new dress bbg.
#jason todd x reader#dick grayson x reader#batboys#batboys x reader#batboys x batmom#batfam x reader#batboys fluff#nightwing#nigthwing x reader#red hood x reader#Jason Todd x Reader#Jason Todd x You#Jason Todd x Y/N#Jason Todd Fluff#Jason Todd Angst#Jason Todd Comfort#Jason Todd Headcanons#Jason Todd Imagines#Red Hood x Reader#Red Hood x You#Red Hood x Y/N#Red Hood Fluff#Red Hood Comfort#Batfamily#Batfamily x Reader#Batfamily Fluff#Batfamily x You#Batfamily x Y/N#Batfamily Headcanons#Batfamily Imagines
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